i need to take a handful of horse tranquilizers

this scott 3l rewatch it so so strange. i was right with my original notes, their relationship does not read nearly as scary from the scott pov and im really wondering why this is. My first theory was that it was an editing style thing or a background music thing or maybe the specific scenes that are missing but now that I’m really thinking about it I Dont Know

*opens trenchcoat to reveal several pamphlets with fic tropes on them* What kind of nicities might you be interested in Tumblr user error-is-bae? `<•##>3

well hello there anonymous tumblr user that im fairly certain is one of two people.

listen man i know everyone and their dog has written a fic where gabriel atones for the errors of his ways by throwing himself into rebuilding lust w minos. but i cannot get the concept out of my head

every interp ive seen thus far has minos be angry, yes, but i dont think hes been angry enough. i want him to break. i want him to tear into gabriel like a rabid fucking beast. i want him to grab him by the throat and throw him to the floor hard enough shards of concrete get lodged in his lungs. i want gabriel to scramble back instinctively because he knows hes no match for a prime soul, especially not without his Light but he's not fast enough and then Minos grabs him again and he can't breathe--

and i want him to just go limp. to accept his fate. and minos just gets angrier because he wants him to fight, he wants to revel in the feeling of his bones crunching and listening to him scream but it's not satisfying if he doesnt fight back and he did not waste away in that god forsaken prison watching everything he'd worked so hard to achieve (peacefully! he never wanted a fight, he wanted to thrive, he tried to reason--) be torn down by his own withered hands only for gabriel to rob him of what little gratification he could receive as if he hadn't already taken everything from him. i want him to roar "why won't you fight me?!" as he lifts gabriel by his collar. he wants to see the spirit that gabriel had before (when they were colleagues, friends even, when they would spend their time debating philosophy and literature and enjoying being together), wants to watch it break under his fists--

(and he thinks of the way gabriel looked down at him so long ago, the divine light of the spear held to his throat shining across his armor, the way he had pleaded for some of that previous kindness to return only to feel as the head pierced his skin and dug its way through his flesh, blood curling down his neck in rivulets and pooling in his mouth as he gasped for any semblance of breath he could take--)

and for just a second he thinks of how things could have been so much different if gabriel had a heart. if he was allowed to rule his kingdom in peace, allowed to let his people prosper and grow and have a second chance. and he looks at gabriel, sad and limp and broken in his grip, but hes not broken like a warrior after a valiant fight or a killer after a spree, hes broken like a fledgling bird with clipped feathers pecking at fingers for its own survival, like a child tucked away in a damp street corner waiting for it to be safe to move again, like the people he had helped build a new life in death.

and on one hand it infuriates him because gabriel is the reason he never got to see his people thrive, never got to see his kingdom grow and live and by all means he should despise him for everything hes done

but at the same time he remembers the gabriel from before the Council, remembers their late nights together, remembers the intelligence and the wit and the charm and the kindness they had Beaten out of him, sees how hopeless and faithless he has become

and sees that he has the chance to be better.

but he has to think about it. so he drops gabriel to the ground and watches as he scuttles back and coughs for breath and looks up at him and can practically feel the confusion and disbelief radiating off of him and if he's honest hes not sure hes making the right decision either. so he turns around and stalks away before he has the chance to change his mind.

anygays. i spent way too long writing this out cus im just obsessed with the concept of them growing closer Slowly because obviously minos can never truly forgive him and gabriel cant ever be rid of that Guilt but i do think there's something there to work from. they just have to put in some effort.

[ID: A redraw of the "let's talk about the mail" scene from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Sonder, a person with pale skin, short brown curly hair, blue eyes, and glasses, is glaring angrily at another person, mostly offscreen, and holding up one hand while another one rests on a conspiracy board behind her. The conspiracy board involves a picture of the Coin from Blaseball labeled "this bitch", a picture of a bunch of the suns from Blaseball, a logo of the sun with a blue arrow through it labeled "bad? KILL", the Welcome to Desert Bluffs logo, a picture of the Dawn Machine from Fallen London, a large piece of paper just reading "the sun the sun the sun" over and over, a piece of paper with a dollar sign on it and a smaller piece of paper below it reading "capitalism (BAD)", and many other pieces of paper with writing on them, including one with "destroya destroya against the sun we're the enemy," "the sun goes out when god explodes (harrow the ninth)," "god??", and a few pieces that are partially covered but appear to read "killed," "bastard," "i'm so cold," and simply "the sun". All of these are connected by red strings. Captions at the bottom read "Let's talk about the sun. Can we talk about the sun? I've been dying to talk about the sun." End ID.]

my mood recently and also constantly forever

This is going to sound like the world's most brain-rotted thought but passerine by the oh hellos is martlet coded and canary in a coal mine by the crane wives is clover coded

good morning internet i have drank a cotton candy bang energy and now i am seeing capcom's true original plan for resident evil village and that plan is just "yeah make a weird lumpy fish man who turns into an even bigger and lumpier fish man. now make him FUCK." i know that the one nine inch nails song about fucking like an animal came out before resident evil village however they travelled forward in time and saw re village and went "i need to write a song about moreau from resident evil village." just like the original doctor moreau (known for his island), everybody want him. tumblr slept on him in favor of heisenberg and lady dimitrescu and even donna whateverthefuckherlastnameis. but the REAL residetn evil sexyman is SALVOATR MOREAU. he gets SO MUCH BITCHES it is UNRRAL. yes i have been awake since 230 morning my time. and yes i did just chug a bang energy. and yes i may be losing my mind but the truth COME OUT. SALVATORE MOREAU *DOES* IS GET BITCHES. not me. i dont want him carnally or in any other way he is my least favorite character not just in resident evil village but in the series asa whole. he's so narsty and slimy. however i think in universe he gets so much bitches. and i think that should extend to out of universe. everyone wanted to fuck the duke when resident evil village came out. or maybe there was like one very vocal person that i s

post cancelled the person who wanted to fuck the duke also had the hots for moreau iirc. ok cool post cancelled i can rest in peace knowing SOMEONE sees my vision of moreau getting mad bitches. i dont even know if tehy still have a tumblr but i remember seeing selfship moreau art on my dash and i didnt know who he was but fuck yeah you go you fucking funky litele fish fucker. i guess.

ok so. kaine has obviously existed longer than bg3 and gale have, so with that in mind i have two questions

first of all, who was kaine before bg3 and gale? did kaine have a different partner? did kaine as a character change at all when you put him in bg3? is bg3 canon now?

and secondly, what made kaine x gale make sense? what made it happen? what made it grow to this immense size?

one of these days i could probably sit down and share all of kaine's history + lore but that would require my brain to work in some organized way so likely it won't happen</3 but this i can do

[deep inhale]

the first thing to know about kaine is that they were born entirely of whatever the fuck happened to my brain the first time i watched the music video for move by taemin. they were an idea way before this, but literally within 24 hours of this album drop they became a fully realized creation.

in their very earliest iteration, kaine was the only child to a minor noble family in an unnamed nation somewhere in faerun, and they were born very sick and as such grew up intensely sheltered. prior to their first campaign (hoard of the dragon queen lmao) they ran away from home in an attempt to prove to themself that they were strong enough to... well, to live.

eventually, they became the central part of an original setting, which i then created a homebrew dnd campaign centered around. the first time i ran a game in their setting circa 2018 they did have a bit of a fling with another npc, but it was more or less a tactic to tie their two parts of the story together. that game fell apart and when i began it again, rewritten (more than a year and a half ago!) that npc was no longer a part of it. they're still the main driving force behind the campaign - it was their prophecy that brought the party together, and they're using the party as their ticket to the outside world.

kaine didn't necessarily change much when they were stuck in bg3. i changed their lore a little bit, of course - the crux of my homebrew setting (osoa) is that it's a small place inside what is essentially a demiplane snowglobe, and what the people there perceive as the "spiritual plane" is the layer of the cosmos that separates them from faerun. in that version of events, kaine learns the truth through an arcane connection across the planes with another character (we don't have to get into his crazy ass rn) and kaine's efforts (along with the efforts of a cult of fanatics) end up shattering the glass and reconnecting their demiplane with faerun.

for bg3, all i did was push that story up, and made kaine more passive in it - osoa was reconnected with faerun when they were young, partially as a result of the ritual that imprisoned their magic, and by the time they grew up, it was old news.

so no, bg3 isn't their "canon" - although it's not any less canon than their original story, i think. there's the kaine that exists in their og story, the kaine that exists in my dnd campaign, and the kaine that exists in bg3 - all loosely related but equal in the end. i use them for basically anything i get the excuse to, anyway.

now. kainegale. [grabs you]

i hadn't actually intended to romance gale when i started playing bg3! i didn't play early access and my first campaign was a different character altogether, who i abandoned about 12 hours in because i fucked up a bunch of shit and also because gale had grabbed me by the dick.

i made kaine for gale early on because i saw him as a good foil for them. kaine is a sorcerer, but they spent their whole life studying magic theory. they weren't allowed to use their magic to their full potential because of its volatility and the nature of its imprisonment, so they were made to study everything they could in an attempt to ensure their safety. this, of course, built up resentment for magical theory and school and lessons and whatnot. gale, of course, is a wizard, and loves to read, but more importantly he loves to teach.

it is vital to understand this in the context of their relationship - gale changes everything kaine thinks they know about what magic is. not only is he a practitioner of a different type of magic altogether, but when he speaks, kaine wants to listen. they can hear the value in it. he makes it matter to them. and if there's more than a little bit of a professor/student complex in there, well. that's just the effect a little bit of positive reinforcement has on a motherfucker innit

and the more i got to know gale, the more i really felt that he and kaine were made for each other dkjsdfkjksd that sounds so corny but it's true.... there's just so much about them that i didn't do intentionally that makes me absolutely insane.

the symbolism. his name is gale for fuck's sake - the storm imagery is built in to his character. kaine is a blue draconic sorcerer - they're lightning, they're thunder, they're a raging windstorm.

as if this wasn't enough, they really are two sides of the same coin. they've both been dehumanized without realizing it, in totally opposite ways. gale by his relationship with mystra - she built him into something she could use, she made him think he was nothing without her, and then ripped everything away from him when he acted of his own will, effectively proving it. when we meet him, he thinks he's nothing. even in act three, at the carnival - "gale thinks that he, and the world, would be better off if he were dead."

compare this to kaine. they've grown up being told over and over that they are the strongest mage their bloodline has produced in generations, that they are the scion of house silva that is going to lead valais into a new era of prosperity, that they deserve all this and more - but they're not allowed to feel it. they're not allowed to leave the palace, they haven't been named or coronated to their people, their existence has been all but kept secret outside of their country, and they're not allowed to use their power. they've been magically shackled for as long as they can remember. their power is nothing but a tool, and it's not a tool that's at their disposal.

kaine teaches gale how to choose himself. gale teaches kaine how to be themself.

and their personalities, too. idk. i have these Thoughts and Theories about gale's time as mystra's chosen, and how he essentially has to adjust to being mortal again, and how kaine is all new to the world and experiencing everything for the first time, and just. im fucking holding them so tightly in my hands

of course all of this just exacerbates the most harmful parts of themselves, and everything gets worse before it gets better, but they are so. they just get each other. idk. it was like i didn't even try - they just became this thing that i am merely a conduit for. my muse, as it were

thank you so much for asking<33 there's so much more i could say about all of this i'm sure. i'm just so crazy about them both

back to sad loving tommy hours guys

hey bestie im kinda losing it over a post that didn’t clarify it was about c!phil and called him a ‘sadistic bastard who never cared about his son /lh’ (i dont think those words can be lighthearted but okay) it was maintagged, not tagged with anything like c!phil hate or or

im losing it. why do we have to avoid the goddamn main tag anytime phil does literally anything that could be seen as even somewhat bad.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE. Bestie I am so sorry that you had to witness that bullshit with your own two eyes. It pisses me off to the MOON and BACK people cannot bring themselves to have a single brain cell? It’s fucking insane.

Tag your shit, people. Jfc this isn’t rocket science.