#i’m sorry i didn’t mean to go off
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fucking insane how my english teacher expects us to write a full length mla style essay with multiple cited sources for our exam, despite the fact that this year we’ve only done two essays at the beginning of the year with only one source and that’s literally all the writing we’ve done. even more insane how she’s confused as to how we don’t understand what to do
#like she’s a nice person but#not a good teacher#she waits until the very last second to put in grades#like last quarter she wasn’t able to finish grading everything on time bc she waited so long and gave us so many assignments#which is also hypocritical because get this !! she doesn’t accept late work !!!#what the actual fuck#this essay is supposed to help prepare us for ap english classes next year#which guess what! i’m not taking an ap english class!! so this is pointless to me!!#literally everyone is confused about the prompt#it literally says ‘come up with a common theme between the three sources and use evidence to defend your thesis’#but then in class she says we have to have an opinion to defend?? despite the prompt she gave us never mentioning defending an opinion????#i stg#again she’s a really nice lady but. i fucking hate her teaching style.#it’s not helpful since we spend so much class time on things like writing journals and talking about our lives and shit.#which i’d be fine with if our classes weren’t 45 minutes each.#also the writing journal prompts are so hard to answer. i straight up don’t do them anymore bc i don’t know what to put.#also also whenever she gives us time to work quietly on whatever she tells us to#she ALWAYS starts talking about unrelated things like what the plan is for the week or something that happened in her personal life#which distracts me from my task and i end up not finishing it#i’m sorry i didn’t mean to go off#i’m just glad that tomorrow is our last day of class and then exams are next week and then i’m DONE for the summer#only now i have less free time since my mom made me get a job that causes me physical pain :)))))#which means having to take more time sitting and doing nothing while the pain goes away :)))))) only to do it all over again :)))))))))))#on top of swim practice i don’t think i’ll survive#but tbh i’d pick swim over work any day#at least that’s actually beneficial to me#kay speaks
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I want to preface this post by saying that I love the cat king as a character, especially one that has such a major impact on Edwin and his relationship with his queerness and learning to be okay with it; HOWEVER, I also believe that everyone that genuinely believes he should be a love interest for Edwin should read this. (Also if you just like the cat king as a character and want to understand his character better and why his and Edwin’s relationship is not something that would be healthy or “real” for either)
#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#the cat king#i do not ship them but I don’t want to hate on those who do (mostly) I just want to kind of inform people of the creators meaning for their#Relationship because I keep seeing people saying they hope they get together in s2 and it’s really confusing to me#Their relationship stems from the cat kings own narcissism and predatory behavior and Edwin’s need for someone to push him into under#Standing that his queerness doesn’t have to be torture and can be something giddy#even if he doesn’t return those feelings#The cat king does like Edwin but he doesn’t know anything about him. He likes the game and then he likes the kindness he’s shown despite#Knowing the cruelty he’s presented to Edwin#Queerness and preformance always go hand in hand#He’s a older secretly insecure character#Edwin is the younger#genuinely kind character that shows him that projecting his hurt will never get him what he wants#It’s about the isolation of queerness and the walls put up and the coping mechanism used to protect yourself even at the risk of hurting#Those just like you. That kiss from edwin was to say “I’m sorry your loneliness had caused you to be cruel. It’s the easiest way to feel.#And while I cannot and will not give you what you want or need#you deserve to feel happy and not like you have to gain the attention of uninterested people#I can’t even explain all my thoughts about their dynamic it’s just so much it’s just about the predadation from older queers because of#The trauma they’ve endured and the cycle of hurt and the way we can break the cycle with kindness while also protecting our youths by#Healing those traumas#Something the cat king learns and accepts#Off topic but I don’t like people defending their age gap because#Yes; Edwin is 86#but he died with a teenage boy brain and then spent 70 of those years in hell where he certainly was not getting his brain developed while#The cat king has possibly hundreds of years of sentience and experience. The power imbalance is not if y’all. And that part of their dynami#Is actually very clear I think but some people didn’t catch it?? Or didn’t care??? Idk man
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hi so i just finished bridge to terabithia and now i’m unwell and my eyes are red because i’ve been crying before i’d even reached 20 minutes of it for i actually knew what was going to happen and by the time i reached an hour something something i just straight up sobbing screaming into my pillow. and now it’s 12 am and i’m still thinking about them. because god, look at them, how they were, the little world they lived in, wouldn’t you just love that, to run away, to escape, to grasp that childhood naivety and innocence that you lost a long time ago, to feel the sun in your skin and the air in your lungs and to paint fantasies and laugh and play and run hidden away from the world and find an old run down tree house and decided to make it your own little shelter and pin up canvases on the worn wood and paint and let your creativity goes wild and have someone understand you and gets you and do it with you, and wouldn’t you just love to have something so constant, so sincere, so genuine, so pure, so real, that there wasn’t anything else. if i knew i was going to cry this much, if i knew how much space this movie would make in my life, i wouldn’t have started this movie tonight. i would have been in peace on the floor of my room, not realizing how badly i actually want something like this even though i would never unironically admit this to anyone in my life or even myself when i’m outside of the familiar place of my mind, for that matters
#bridge to terabithia#how am i supposed to recover#i wasn’t planning to write a paragraph about it but yeah i kinda love this movie i guess#i needed a good cry and the universe didn’t stop me from choosing this movie i don’t know if that’s nice or simply mean#i was going to watch la la land after this but that’s not gonna happen now#i’m not reading back what i wrote otherwise i would just delete it because i’d think this movie deserves better more coherent thoughts#and i’d say that i’d just rewrite it tomorrow but then i wouldn’t#because nothing would ever beat the “everything i create has to be great or nothing” in me#and i never am proud of what i made unless it’s supposedly only for my viewing#so i actually don’t know if what i just wrote make sense but yeah#my eyes feel so weird right now#also the ending was definitely up to interpretations!! (spoiler alert* just in case)#i myself personally like to believe he dreamed up the last 30 minutes of it and didn’t even go to the museum#and so he’ll just wake up definitely shocked but then still find leslie in her house who was just about to meet him so they could go!!#and because the rope was cut off by the lightning from last night they decide to build the bridge so everyone could cross safe and sound!!#i like my ending better they really should change it#but no all and all the end was really beautiful#even though it took me maybe even an hour to get through it because i keep sobbing and have to repeat over and over to hear what they said#yeah okay anyways sorry for the rant<3#i’m not sure what this is#but glad i could get it off my chest#let’s see how to tag how to tag#movies#just#childhood#whatever <3#nadirants
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HI BESTIE COMING IN TO MAKEOUT WITH YOU RN. HOW ARE WE DOING??? I'LL GO FIRST: SO SO FUCKING UNWELL <3 JSDKLSDHJKL
But also your tags on my analysis,,, 👁️👁️
I have Since Shifted on things a little bit after making that post, because I've seen others point things out, as well as noticed differences myself.
SO I'M COMING IN TO TALK EVEN FURTHER ANALYSIS WITH YOU BECAUSE SHDJKSDSK YEAH THE MAN IN THE FOREST OKAY OKAY SO-
There's speculation right now that the man in blue in the top picture and the man with his back to the camera in the bottom picture are the same person. And the current speculation I've seen right now is that it's fucking Hornigold.
But I also wouldn't be surprised if it's like, some other sort of threat too? Like some sort of British Admiral or someone else out to get the lot of them? Or maybe they're entirely different people shdjks BUT I'M LEANING TOWARDS THERE BEING SOME SORT OF CONNECTION,,,
Because like, the Wee John shot comes right before Ed's barrel shot. So I'm like 👀👀👀
BUT REGARDLESS, LOOKING DIRE/DRAMATIC FOR A FEW REASONS.
I was so ~*~swept up~*~ by the beauty that is Wee John in drag in that first shot that I didn't really pay attention to the surroundings. If you look closely, it doesn't really look that much like a party anymore, but some sort of hostage situation/attack. Or maybe it WAS a party, but then whoever the hell that is crashed it.
Because Wee John's hands seem to be bound, someone appears to be tied to the mast, Roach looks like he's having a Bad Time in the foreground, etc etc.
And I THINK it's the Revenge? So like, they were partying, and then chaos ensued, or something along those lines.
AND NOT ONLY THAT, BUT LIKE...
Ed looks desperate, man. And the lighting and his costume/makeup all match up. And because he's wearing the fucking pearls, and has his hair back, and doesn't have his makeup on, this makes me think that ALL of this is in the latter half of the season.
His desperation also makes me think that whoever the fuck THAT is captured/did something bad to Stede. Like maybe...
Whatever led to him screaming like THIS. ((I know there's a high possibility it could be something funny like a crab getting a little 🍆🦀 or something equivalent. BUT ALSO, WASN'T A TORTURER CAST?????))
Anyway, TLDR, they were trying to have a nice party, whoever the fuck that is crashed it and fucked with the crew and/or did something horrible with Stede, and Ed is fucking PISSED ABOUT IT.
((dude if that is the case, and like, they haven't fully made up, yet ed goes absolutely INSANE trying to protect stede??? that's one of my favorite tropes so i'll be in the Ground hope you know that))
anyway kiss kiss smooch smooch rolling into my grave <3
JODI JODI YAAAAAAY I ALWAYS LOVE LOVE LOVE WHEN YOURE IN MY INBOX!!!! it means i’m in for a good time! and MY GOD did you deliver!!!
i’m obsessed with this theory! i think you’re right - this very well could be Hornigold, which would explain Ed’s desperation and unease. It would also explain the barrel situation. “He treated us like dogs — worse than dogs.” Maybe this is finally his chance to get back at this prick.
In terms of the party on the Revenge:
Talent show? 👁️👁️
Maybe they’re finally doing what they were going to before everything went to shit. It would explain Wee John in drag! Maybe Hornigold seizes the The Revenge midway through? This also means that this could happen post reunion, which explains the pearls and the hair tied back.
I can’t recall if it was a torture or an executioner that was cast! Does anyone have that info hiding anywhere? You could be right about that too Jodi! Hornigold’s taken Stede captive and Ed has to get him back even if they haven’t made up yet, or something along those lines.
WAIT! What if the beach gunfighting scene is them returning to each other after all that?
UH OH
If I think about this any more I’m going to die 😌👍 this response was not nearly as coherent as what you’ve presented here, but we’ve been in the clown car together since the start so I’m starting to think we could communicate telepathically at this point.
#I LOVE YOU I LOVE THINKING THOUGHTS#THIS SEASON IS GOING TO BLOW OUR FACES OFF#i’m so tired i didn’t get to sleep until like 1:30 and then woke up at 3:00 for the teaser#i went back to sleep after a few hours but my body is fuckin hating me for it rn hahahaha#so i’m sorry if this response isn’t terribly articulate#but you know what i mean!!!!!#ofmd#ofmd s2 teaser#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd s2 predictions#ask#💕✨
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Residency…
Even my eyebag’s eyebags have eyebags at this point.
#oh the drama#residency#medicine#surgery#eyebags#please#and i’m doing double work right now since my co-res decided to milk the parental leave system#love that (/s)#and right when the new interns started#so they’re going to be on easy street when they come back since the interns will be prepped and ready to go when they come back#i mean eight weeks off…#and they aren’t even the ones who gave birth#and i’m on call as much as the interns are at this point#i didn’t even get a chance to breathe between PGY-1 and PGY-2 i feel like an extended intern right now tbh#and that isn’t right#sorry but all the extra work getting dumped on me isn’t fair#when they come back they better be ready to WORK#sorry if that’s bitchy and insensitive but what about MY well-being?#i needed to rant this out my therapist wasn’t enough i needed tumblr lol#and i did all this while recovering from a leg injury#if this dude gets the chief position over me i am going to lose it#personal#update: thanks for the hugs and hearts guys 💜💜💜💜
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hello hello good morning!!! i am just stopping by to let u all know that fishie touya nibbled on my finger today and it was literally the cutest thing in the entire universe <333
our pretty rainbow boy <333
also!!! today’s everskies outfit under the cut!! (ﾉ´ヮ´)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
how cute is this!? i wish i had a pair of black overalls irl :(( i only have blue ones atm 。ﾟ(ﾟﾉД｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡
anyway anyway come add me on this silly app if u wanna!! my username is inkyclari! let’s be friends!! i’m still figuring out how the whole thing works hehe but my gosh does it ever remind me of the hours my best friend n i spent dressing up digital dolls when we were lil kids!!!
#i kind of love the fact that there’s a blog AND a guestbook#i was so so so young when i had myspace (way too young to have myspace but all of my bffs older brothers had them D:)#(so we HAD to have them too duh)#but the guestbook function especially reminds me of myspace SO much!!!#like just early web 2.0 type sites#and msn!!!!!! tbh i miss msn HAHA#i was one of the last kids in fifth grade to get one >.>#because that’s when i FINALLY got internet lmfao#my zia made my account bcoz i didn’t know how to#anyway we used lil pixel dollies like this one as our profile pictures ALL the time#and we’d like;;; gatekeep them so hard LMAO#like we’d search online for hours for the cutest ones and then when someone would ask where we got it or if we could send it we’d be like#“oh sorry idk where it is on my computer i lost it :((” and then we'd all laugh together#terrible we were mean kids man#anyway enough reminiscing#i’m off to go edit ta!haitham!!!!!!!! <333333333#all +10k words of him!!!#heeeee wish me luck#have a wonderful day friends <3#clari chatters#pxl.clari
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Okay! Guess we’re going to stash the ending of 27 under “repress, ignore and read comfort and fluff until further notice”
#Harlan I mean this in the nicest way possible#fuck you#malevolent podcast#malevolent part 27#malevolent spoilers#arthur malevolent#Arthur my scrunkly baby boy#john doe malevolent#John I’m so so sorry#this whole episode fucking killed me#and if it didn’t the wait is going to finish me off
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so, i was reading 17° Aquarius which is what Micky's Mars is in and it was... interesting. i mean it's main theme is egotism and being dependent on others for stimulation; corruption and selfishness at its very worse. there's some merit to this but i only say that confidently because his Mars is in his 12H.
while the 4H represents the hidden life, and 8H represents the hidden mind, the 12H represents just being hidden in general; whether its abilities, emotions, opinions, the past, whatever is placed there. it's only accessed/activated -- other than for a profection year -- either willingly, or being forced to tap into it. especially so if there's aspects to it. it's also the last house which often represents endings and closure, answers given, and healing from old wounds.
majority of the time people will either totally ignore whatever's in this house or they'll escape into it to avoid reality. sure, you can ignore or run to your 12H placements for as long as you want, but they will always come back to bite you in the ass. everyone like's to throw karma around here, but that word has become so overused that it overtime lost it's original meaning, to which i cannot even define, as it's been bastardized to fit the white person's spiritual lexicon (thank you colonialism very cool /s). soooo a better way of describing this house is a house of personal retribution.
the reason im bringing this up is not to talk so much about Micky's 12H, since it's only his Mars there ...so sorry worldwide Micky girls nation <\3. although i will say, when i read "susceptibility to physically illness if frustrations grow intense" i got worried, so my eyes are closer than ever on that old man. watching him like a hawk as we speak.
i'm bringing this up because i've mentioned before about Mike's 12H and how that might've came into play when he had that "i got it" moment in his life. we actually have some telling placements here. he has three: his South Node, and asteroids Vesta and Pallas.
im actually not gonna talk about his asteroids because it's not why i'm here in your inbox. why i'm here is to discuss his South Node. this is extremely important, Mike girls. you should take notes. its gonna get melancholic.
in astrology, we have these things called Moon Nodes. you have a North and a South Node, and they will always be opposing each other in opposing signs, because they're supposed to; the North Node represents the present life, the quest, growth, while South Node represents the past life, the resource, our blockages. do you see where this is going?
i could explain the Nodes themselves, as it does give way to fully realizing their curriculum in his chart, but ive honestly hadn't gotten around to fully understanding them just yet because i'm still stuck on degree theory. i'm only sharing what i know and what i'm currently reading on them so that i can explain this correctly. you can read here and here if you sincerely need to know the details. all you have to know for this is that his NN is in Leo 6H and his SN in Aquarius 12H. i've already explained the 12H, but the 6H deals with daily living, organization, service and health. now you are bueno *whip crack effect* 👍
tw death mention coming up here//
i've been quietly busy piecing things together to see what important placements were there in-around the times of death for the three. mistakenly, at first, i would focus heavily on their profection year they died and the aspects to it, without even considering the years before that would lead up to that. those prior years do in fact play a role here. what i've found is that there's no one important placement, aspect or degree that can encompass a death-like sentence to someone's astro makeup. while astrology cannot predict when or even how someone will die, what we can do is posthumously see what important factors lead to their passing.
in Mike's case, he passed in his 7H profection year; the year before, he was in his 6H; to note, he actually has a stellium here, which are all entirely retrograded, but that's not important to this. and guess what was there? because this was the year of 2020, when everyone was isolated and recollecting themselves; this was his Node's last attempts to sober him up before it all ended, and it had to do so by sheer force.
you know what happened next? he stopped hiding.
even after Davy had passed and he gave in to touring with his surviving band members, he still seemed to isolate himself after the show was over. barely showing for interviews with the others. didn't spill himself too much that wasn't about what was going on around him. he kept to himself as always and no one tried too hard to pry him. the usual Michael Nesmith routine.
but after Peter had passed, i think something just snapped in him. for some reason i feel like he found himself more comfortable being vulnerable after Peter was gone... really strange stuff. almost like he was afraid of being or feeling similar to him? ffs i wish he was still alive so i could ask him cause it's gonna kill me otherwise.
but now, amidst the chaos of 2020, instead of running away into comfort and escaping from being vulnerable, he brought those vulnerabilities out instead, especially so on stage. if i had to guess anything about Mike during this time, is that he just wanted to heal. he so badly wanted to mend things even after things were too late & far gone, which i would also include his physical health here too, as 6H rules physical health -- Micky did say he had health issues for a long while. but his struggles trying to communicate that among other things made it a too-little-too-late issue (uh-oh girls, it's his Saturn Rx 3H eating him alive!).
but what he could mend at that moment, he did, and what he was able to mend was his relationship to his audience. remember when we talked about this before with Peter? sighs. Mike went YOINK and took those lessons without directly discussing him, whether he knew it or not. he is sooooo irritating ❤
i'll end this off by sharing this: in one of my sources i have that actually talks about the Nodes, there's a section where the author explains the Nodes through the lens of different religious and cultural mythologies. of course, since we're talking about Mike, the Christian version stood out to me most for this case, which brings in the story of Adam & Eve. at first i passed it off cause it's only a short paragraph in a sea of much more lengthier mythologies, but the more i read it the more enlightening it became to me.
here's the direct quote:
"Eve draws Adam into the world of duality, relationship and further incarnation, by listening to the serpent. Later, Eve having given birth to Mary, God enters mankind through her, thus bringing the Christ out of Adam. Here I would understand Eve and Mary to be representing two different facets of the cosmic feminine principle. So by listening to the serpent, we move further into duality and the world of form, and by listening to God, we are reconnected with unity."
and in the end, Mike finally listened to God. properly. for once in his life.
.
#i’m not even going to add anything here this is a masterpiece all its own so i’m going to let your words do the work kale#they deserve to be front and center because wow dude#mike nesmith#the monkees#the only thing i will say is it is interesting because i can definitely see the shift in mike after peter’s death. i think he really#was confronted by his own morality at that point. having dealt with several health issues by that point himself. and knowing he was only#getting older etc. i also think (and this might be my own bias but) micky in that rolling stone article he did recently he mentions how#mike was still very private but he would say things to micky that he wouldn’t anyone else (which is according to micky so who knows). but#it seems like mike really benefited from micky being the other monkee left (which sounds HORRIBLE) but i mean it in the sense that he#seemingly felt a level of comfort with micky that he didn’t with davy or peter and was able to more fully come forward#when they became a duo. and this might be so off topic but it just came to me as i read this sorry 😂#rhubarb asks
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My professor: you need to follow APA format to the letter or I will fail you on this assignment. I’ve created a model for you to follow for your reference page
The reference page: *single spaced* *no hanging indents* *capitalizes every word of the titles*
#SHE USED REGULAR INDENTS. THERES LIKE NO CITATION STYLE THAT USES REGULAR INDENTS ON THE REFERENCES#bites her bites her bites her bites her#she sucks so hard#I fucking haaaaaaate her#she’s so particular about everything#she will take points off for typos because we’re ‘professionals’ but literally LITERALLY every email or rubric she writes has at LEAST one#typo and usually it’s multiple like she typed it with her eyes closed and just hit send#also we have to revise assignments based on her feedback#but she’ll regularly either a. leave a comment saying you didn’t include something that you included in the literal next sentence#or b. will just say ‘huh?’#HOW DO I FIX HUH I DONT KNOW EHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS#also she has apparently never heard a single figurative language expression#my friend wrote that equality and differentiation go hand in hand and she said ‘hand in hand???? what?’#like girl you tEACH WNGLISH#sorry I’m so fucking mad i hate her I’m so glad to be done with this class#unless she fails me on one assignment meaning I fail the entire class 🥰🥰🥰🥰#personal
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sigh i hate being that person but also not really bc it can be frustrating sometimes so please please please leave feedback for content creators instead of only leaving likes/empty reblogs!!!! obviously we create content because we like doing it and it makes us happy, but it takes time and effort and it helps a lot a lot more than what you might think to give us some feedback/tell us what you liked. trust me, 99% of us aren’t expecting a paragraph (let alone a ten page essay) back, even a few words or a keyboard smash already mean a lot to us, and it can be very frustrating and demotivating to put out content only for it to be silently consumed w/o any sort of interaction. so please support the content you enjoy by rbing (to help circulate it) and leaving feedback 💗💗
#sol.txt#sorry </3 just needed to get this off my chest bc im going to be posting a lot (hopefully) since im taking requests and…#…i hate keeping people waiting for long#but i’m not here just to pump out content and scream into the void#and i wish more people/silent reader’s understand how demotivating it can be wo accusing ccs of ‘doing it just for attention’#using prove it you won’t as an example: i didn’t just yank 19k words from my butt 😭 it took months of writing & rewriting#so is it really too much of ccs to ask for just a few words of feedback when they’ve spent hours upon hours creating content for you? 😞😞#it takes less than 3 minutes rbing and leaving a few tags :(#and if you’re going to say it takes too long to do that: you have time to read 19k words but not enough time to write a few tags? 🤧#also not saying you have to do this for everything on your dash / im just saying if you liked it then why not support the cc who made it#sorry whhshajs this is such a long rant but idk i don’t talk ab this topic a lot and it’s kinda </3 holding it in all the time#but yes please please support your fav ccs!!!! it really doesn’t take as much time as you think <3#and i PROMISE you 99% of ccs appreciate feedback with their whole heart#like we literally send eo screenshots of tags screaming ab how sweet they are#that’s how much feedback means to us 💗 okay that’s enough from me 🤧 this is your reminder to drink some water and stretch
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help nooooo i just realised that they butchered akechi’s character too
#i mean… would mr ‘don’t run in the halls’ really *really* smile as two of his students play tag in said halls?#who is he and which ‘verse is he from? the m*t* s**t* ‘verse????#reliving the [redacted] anime is oddly therapeutic in a way. it gives me an appropriate channel for anger venting#so thanks [redacted] anime for being the anger management course that you are </3 i still hate you though </3#man it’s almost 2 am and i need to be up in 4 hours but i stayed up late to read pksp anyway whoops#binge reading the su-mo chapter was quite the experience. i’m glad the bookstore had all 6 vols when i dropped by#and now i finally understand the moon berlitz references. hell yeaaaaaaaaaaaaa#i lost it when the faba faba-d off though. sorry (not sorry) faba dude kinda deserved it#but man. freakin’ moon and her ‘is ok i studied pharm sci i know how to make all medicines :))’#girl pls what kind of magical pharm sci school did you go to? i never learned anythingggg but placebo pills :(( (former pharm sci student)#reminds me that the capsules we used for class were old af and expired so the capsule filling task didn’t go well at all#making suppositories was weird though. shapin’ the thing and pressing it into the mold and all…#but the expensive tablet making machine was very cute. the temptation to smash it to bits was even cuter though~~
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Those funny bursts of inspiration and motivation that are just like “yes! It’s brilliant! The solution was there all along! JUST WRITE! If I sit down and Just Write and finish my stories I can send them to agents and try and get them published!
And then I look at my laptop like “now what the fuck are words and how do I use them”
#ryan’s ramblings#no seriously why are my biggest bursts of inspiration paired with utter bouts of writer’s block#sometimes it makes me frustrated knowing that making a legit living off my writing will be near impossible#but books that are NYT bestsellers and widely adored are legitimately terrible#not in a mean way just like. I’m sorry Lucy Foley but the Guest List was full of so many embarrassing errors#and then you admit you were an editor for a big publisher???#a silk dress that can’t be touched by ungloved hands because it’s so delicate?#that the bride will simply cut above the knees and dye it for casual use????#A TIERED RED VELVET SPONGE WEDDING CAKE#TRAVELING ON A BOAT?!?#man I know you only made it red velvet to draw a comparison to the color of blood didn’t you#but then to act like red velvet is the fanciest cake flavor is probably funnier than anything else#not to mention the Colleen Hoover obsession rn.#I’m more worried about the fact that my novel genres go from Literary to Sci Fi to Paranormal to Fantasy to whatever. even a romance#not gonna manage to hold an audience through every book at that point#but maybe I’ll have a little bit of something for everyone at the table
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drove my mom to the ER.
#that’s it that’s the text post#no pity or condolences pls#just… felt like I needed to post this. to say something instead of just reblogging shit#not sure it’s necessary…. it’s not… but I dunno maybe I just think my life is so important I need to post vaguely about it#also canceled my therapy appointment for tomorrow because fuck it let the psychic trauma fester#didn’t go last weak but I had a decent reason. I suppose ‘being with sick mother’ is also a decent reason#I just kinda dread seeing my therapist now#funny how he went from cool dude to another person I’m afraid to disappoint in one session#anyway I’ve been in this hospital for about 5 hrs now and it sounds like it’ll be an overnight thing#very sad stuff#but also I hate ‘I’m so sorry’ messages#I know they mean well and I know I’m basically inviting them but let’s like… not do that dance okay?#let’s just keep it loose#band on the sinking titanic vibes#anyway… this is my little injection of my personal life before going off to reblog softcore shit hours later#I didn’t mean to write all of this but it seems I can’t be vague to save my life#you can ignore this#text
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brb gonna go have a breakdown in the shower or something just got an email that i don’t have a job anymore
like I knew it was coming but really at almost 11 on Friday night?
great follow up to my dad p much trying to attack me yesterday bc I wouldn’t let him (who doesn’t even have a drivers license anymore bc seizures and vision problems and beginnings of dementia) get in the truck and drive probably all the way to dallas bc he decided he wanted to just move out I guess with his 1 bag of shit we take him to dialysis with but yeah im a “son of a bitch” he threatened to “call the sheriff” on for not letting him go kill himself and others in a big truck that will crush a good portion of other vehicles out there
#it’s not bc I was doing anything wrong it’s because the doctor would have to say I was better enough to go back and apparently I’m not so#she didn’t#and fmla protection ran out already so they weren’t required to hold the job anymore#i shouldn’t be upset bc that job literally made me su1c1dal and made me want to tear off my skin but like#i have things i need to pay for#that means I won’t have insurance soon either#sorry you had to see this#delete later
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Why is he just talking to me like normal sometimes
#I don’t understand at all#and he posted triggering content without a warning#I know people forget yknow it happens and I just tweeted about feeling bad and he replied asking if I was okay#which still feels really weird rn because he’s never apologized or talked things out with me#and I just said I saw something triggering and he said he hopes the poster gets punched in the face#I didn’t wanna say it was him so I just said I hope not#I just feel really weird about all of this rn#I don’t wanna pretend everything’s fine#I don’t wanna just keep going like it never happened#it’s not healthy either#I’m sorry to anyone following this stuff it’s probably getting annoying by now#I’m just too scared to start the conversation because I don’t want him to go off on me#and I guess at this point he’s not gonna do it#just because me and your bf talked it out doesn’t mean it’s over
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#I had a horrible afternoon after my good morning but I’ve been moving on from it#helped greatly by the fact that I was going to Google Charlotte Tilbury lipsticks#but I accidentally wrote ‘HARLOT tilbury’ like a million times and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t finding lipstick#i’m still laughing#god help me#I’m sorry Charlotte I didn’t mean it#off season [ooc]
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