dukat: ah! captian sisko. it seems like you have seized cardassia by the balls once again. if only we were on the same side. cardassia cluld use a man like you

sisko: ah but dukat, cardassia has no balls, on the fact that the federation removed them. you are out numbered out played and outballed. and the question is. what now?

julian in the back of ops (he isnt supposed to be there):

Gotham Characters and Hyperpop Songs They Remind Me Of

Jim Gordon: I Need Help Immediately - 100 Gecs

Explanation: Not only is the title so true for him, but this song gives me major anxiety. And everything he does gives me anxiety. I feel like if a song was used to describe his character, it would just be this one. Like get therapy pookie you need it.

Harvey Bullock: Stupid Horse - 100 Gecs

Explanation: I don't really have one for this. I just think about this song and think about how he would have such a hard time understanding what they're saying. Then he'd give up and never listen to it again.

Oswald Cobblepot: Yummy - Ayesha Erotica

Explanation: He's literally so cunty guys like cmon. He's so cunty!? He'd blare this in his convertible while driving to the GCPD to bother Jim.

Victor Zsasz: #BrooklynBloodPop! - SyKo

Explanation: I have a feeling that he would actually REALLY love hyperpop. He loves disco, so I think he'd like hyperpop. He'd listen to this while assassinating people fr. He'd try and fire shots so they sync to the beat too lol help me.

Bruce Wayne: Haunted - Laura Les

Explanation: This kid's got demons. He's fighting these demons everyday bro. He had an emo phase. This kid needs therapy asap.

Barbara Kean: Worldwide Torture - Jazmin Bean

Explanation: She's so girlboss and she could rip you in half with her teeth girl. Sleep with one eye open.

Selina Kyle: Voicemail - Poppy

Explanation: She's had to fend for herself her whole life and this song really reminds me of that. That' really the only explanation I have for this tbh.

Jerome Valeska: Punk Tactics - Joey Valence & Brae

Explanation: You're gonna tell me you can't see him dancing to this like a child? Cmon. Like Victor Zsasz he'd try and sync gunshots with the beat and he'd lip sync too.

Edward Nygma: Kill V. Maim - Grimes AND Freak Show - Punkinloveee

Explanation: Guys...I need him. Ok anyways, I feel like he REALLY genuinely loves hyperpop. He likes the electronic sound it has and how much bass it can have. He would be a huge fan of Grimes and random hyperpop songs.....

....

...

He would listen to Freak Show during sex...

what's up kids it's that time again already

because I am extremely ready to be done with season 4 !!!

Gotham 4x17

something wild I've just realized is that at this point there are only 18 episodes left of the entire show, since season 5 was retooled into a half season that only got 12 eps and had to cut several ideas and characters including, among other things, the presence of Man-Bat. that's odd partly because I've spent something like nine months chipping away at Gotham at this point, and it's very strange to imagine my life now without any more Gotham to liveblog. it's also strange because this is no way feels like a story that's nearing any kind of conclusion, and I have to assume that when it inevitably comes the end will be as abrupt, brutal, and messy as every other aspect of Gotham up until that point.

anyway let's see what fresh hell is in store for us this time

god we've really abandoned all pretenses here Bruce is Batmanning on every level except for actually wearing a bat cowl

Oswald looking UNBELIEVABLY cunty atm I'm OBSESSED

bitch!!!

it would have been so cool if Bridgit had literally any kind of consistent personality or motivation but alas it is not that kind of show

a cool thing about the show never technically letting Cameron Monaghan's character be referred to as the Joker is that I don't technically have to like the Joker! and that's a huge relief because I do in fact like Jerome very much

oh my god they stumbled into an interesting Riddler moment again. this rules. like realistically this is about as good as guy whose whole gimmick is riddles could probably do for himself.

Lee got rid of her shitty bangs AND has acquired some sparkly fingerless fishnet gloves I love this for her

oh boy Jerome in a dog cage better not be a writer's poorly disguised fetish

I am once again asking what the point of making him Solomon Grundy was it lasted like ??? six episodes ??? people come back from the dead on this show all the time it didn't have to be a Thing

the thing is that if I didn't already know what the reveal is going to be (there's a second Valeska and Cameron Monaghan is going to play his own twin) I would simply have to assume they were going an incredibly bold gay Joker route and having Jerome hunt down his ex boyfriend

hey this is unhinged. like there have been a Lot of stupid storylines in this show but this genuinely so dumb and SO unnecessary

they want me to believe he stapled a live barracuda to someone's face as if the Riddler could possibly control a noble barracuda

there are just so many men in this city that Lee should be permitted to dismember with her bare hands

oooh baby Orphan Black this is not they are STRAINING to keep from having to show two Cameron Monaghan's at the same time. this is so disjointed

Hatter and Scarecrow getting sent to kill Jim and Harvey but immediately giving up because Harvey uuuuh screamed and ran right at them is ??? lmao??? you are so bad at your jobs hit him with some fear toxin or something?

also exactly no one on this show seems willing to actually run like their life is on the line which is really creating a very weird ambience. Mad Hatter and Scarecrow are doing the white person half-jog across the intersection while being chased with a gun

anyway Jerome just gave his brother a little smooch on the head but I don't think I'm insane for saying it seems like he wants to put his entire tongue in his twin's mouth. and that is hands down like the most normal thing going on in this episode.

RESPECT FOR LEE THOMPKINS: LOST !!!!!!!!!

New Episode, New Ian

What they showed:

What we all thought of:

and that made the ending of last night’s episode fraught with emotion (as did Cam’s acting), and I was sort of freaked out by events until about an hour after the show when I saw the full scene in the church from the next episode-and now I’m back to thinking Shameless is just continuing their same old bullshit.  

Weekly warning: There will be spoilers under the cut, even one for The Walking Dead so if you haven’t seen last week’s mid-season finale of that show-you have been warned.

Another brand new writer this week-I wasn’t impressed.  Last week’s seemed ignorant about sexual orientation, this week’s seems just as uninformed about addiction (and maybe medications to treat bipolar disorder).  

I’ll try to dispense with the other storylines as quickly as possible.  The Kev and Vee stuff doesn’t interest me or amuse me in the least-it’s not my cup of tea anyway, but of course it’s not being well-written and that hurts its chances even more.  This week we saw the twins for a second, but no Yev and no Svetlana.  I guess the thrupple is over again already?

Carl is a waste of screen time this year, in my opinion.  The new love interest is a weird, bitchy sort who screams about the living hell of her teen life-which includes SAT prep, tennis camp, and cruising the Greek islands on “P Diddy’s” yacht.  You’re trying too hard, Shameless, we’d hate this teen bride to be without all the whining.  

Oh, we also find out Carl is also 16 this week-so, either Debbie’s twin or another set of (heretofore unmentioned) Irish twins.  

Frank is a total waste of time too, except one interesting line-he tells a stranger in line at a job fair he has “five kids”, so I guess he really doesn’t count Ian as his own.  

It’s Liam’s last day of school?  But Carl’s just weeks away from going back to school?  I know the time line has never made sense, but wtf?  

Also Fiona flat out states she’s 28 in this episode-what’s with the new writers establishing ages all of the sudden?

Debbie should’ve gotten fired in her first scene at work, but doesn’t, but self-sabotages the job later (in typically “hilarious” aka unfunny Shameless fashion), and from an Emmy tweet I guess the audience is supposed to think she stood up for herself but all I could think was, “Good luck getting another job where they let you bring your baby to work in a pet carrier.”  Of course Debbie IS a Gallagher and this IS Shameless, so by next week she’ll probably have some high paying steady job with in-house daycare and a retirement plan...

Snore got to have a couple of lines this week-setting up her still in the future storyline.  Lip asks her if she’s ok when she seems distracted/down in the dumps/who tf knows what she was going for, and she answers, “Sorry, just stuff.”  Lip says, “You wanna talk about it?” and she says, “Naw, it’s fucked up.”  Ian will have a similarly cryptic scene at the end of the show-suddenly they want us to think storylines continue from week to week?  

We meet Fiona’s new fella-the only thing remotely interesting about him is his Irish accent.  Nessa’s got her weekly “I’m never at work, I’m always free to hang with Fiona” scene too, in which Fiona says Ian has a “history of psycho behavior” so fuck you, New Writer.  (Fiona also has a history-of child endangerment and neglect-so she should put those stones away while she’s living in that glass house.)  

Lip had another week where I just can’t invest in what he’s got going on.  Why is Lip, the alcoholic adult child of an alcoholic so disillusioned and shocked by Youens’ downfall?  Why are they writing him so naive?  Lip is supposed to be smart, plus he’s watched Frank his entire life-we’re supposed to believe that he was gobsmacked by Youens getting drunk during an hour break at the courthouse?  Wouldn’t that be Frank to a T?  You remember Lip’s dad, don’t you?  The guy who when he couldn’t get booze down this throat used an eye dropper to get alcohol into his blood stream thru his eyes?  They have Brad say to Lip that with Youens’ record, if it was anyone else, Lip would say he belongs in jail after his fifth DUI-which rings true.  If it were Frank in the same position, Lip would be testifying against him!  Anyway, the big farewell scene at the prison, the writer to me showed little to zero sympathy (or maybe even awareness?) that alcoholism is a disease.  Instead of giving Youens a speech like Ian got to keep his EMT job, Youens tells Lip he’s “a drunk”.  Don’t any of these people watch Mom on CBS?  And I’m not being flippant-my uncle (my mother’s brother) was an alcoholic and I don’t think he had a drink during my entire lifetime (he was working on his sobriety by the time I was born), but I know he did struggle every day, he wanted a drink every day of his life.  The show keeps acting like there’s just some magic hump Lip needs to get over and then he won’t want/need to drink and it just doesn’t work that way.  That’s why the program says “one day at a time”-Lip can’t keep waiting for some magic moment one day down the road where he’ll be “cured” and never want another drink.  Lip did his 28 days, he’s been going to meetings, he should know this.  The writers definitely should know it, but they don’t treat alcoholism like a disease at all-I don’t get it and I don’t think the storyline is great.  Lip hasn’t seemed to learn anything from any of the father figures in his life.  Also?  I strongly suspect that now that Youens is “put away” and Brad’s too overwhelmed to be a sponsor,  they’ll show Lip searching for a new sponsor next week, but after that he’s going to be Snore’s rock when Terry-oops, I mean her father-gets out of prison and all of Lip’s drinking issues WILL have magically been handled to free him up to be her hero.

Now on to the only reason I keep watching this mess of a show.  When we first see Ian this week, it’s in a very OOC scene of him throwing not one but two buckets of icy water on Fiona in bed.  Really?  You expect me to invoke a suspension of disbelief so strong that it believes that A: Ian would ever do such a thing, and B: (since we find out he’s been doing it for a week) that Fiona’s mattress isn’t completely ruined?  Fuck you, Shameless.  And between “joking” about killing her and now this act of aggression, I’m really getting sick of how they’re writing Ian-he’s never been like that.  

Speaking of character traits-next we see Jerome spelling out MANIAX on the sidewa...Oops, sorry, Ian’s egging Fiona’s building and writing out his explanation of where “Cuntlord” came from as a mash up on the sidewalk in spraypaint.  He’s also got the kids from the shelter with him and they’re setting up a tent city on the conveniently empty lot next to Fi’s apartments.  Terror is...there.  Standing there.  Being useless.  Ian gets in Fiona’s face, says he wants her to “smell their shit”-oh, Shameless, you’re making it too easy-the whole show smells like shit.  Terror tries to tell Ian it sounds like a family issue, that Ian shouldn’t be using “Terror’s kids” (I cringe every time he shouts “my kids” at Ian).  Ian’s got a bullhorn, they chant some obscenities (as if Fiona’s tenants and other people in the neighborhood wouldn’t call the cops about THAT)...you can just see the wheels turning, that Shameless is trying to be shameless again, but it ain’t working.  Anyway, Terror stands there trying to look worried (it comes off more as constipated) as Ian marches off around the building with the kids.  If we’re supposed to think he’s like Mickey worrying about Ian as he was losing control, it’s not working.  

As soon as Ian leaves for work, Fiona buys all the kids off with free pizza and twenty bucks-and even the girl crushing on Ian has her price and is the last to leave.  I bet that’s the last we’ll see of the “kids”.  Fiona also pulls a totally cunty move and has all the kids’ stuff removed by a clean up crew.  It would’ve killed them to write a line where she says, “Bring it back to the Youth Center but tell someone in charge there that if they set up again, I’m throwing it out.”?  

When Ian gets back to the lot after work, he and Terror are looking on the scene and they start to pick up some stuff Fiona’s crew missed.  Fi is trying to talk to Ian, to apologize and put it behind them, but Ian’s ignoring her.  She says that Margo has another building and that she’s willing to lease it and waive the first and last month’s rent deposit, Ian says they’re not interested in charity.  Terror speaks up and Ian barks at him, and then Fiona asks Ian if he’s off his meds.  That only makes Ian madder, but she tries again, asks, “are you taking them?”  Ian is livid now, he informs Fiona that yes, he is taking them and that he’s “fucking angry” and is she going to suspect he’s off his meds for the rest of his life when he gets angry and that he’s allowed to be “angry at bitch assholes when they’re being fucking bitch assholes,” and then he stomps off, obviously upset and hurting and Terror stays with Fi just like he stayed with Monica when Ian was hurt and upset by her-because Terror never validates Ian’s feelings and is TOXIC.  Fi doesn’t go after Ian either, and tells Terror to go look at the building for the youths.  She doesn’t say the offer is time sensitive though, ffs.  

Ian doesn’t get home till it’s full dark out-where was he all afternoon and during the early evening?  At the time I was hoping Mickey’s abandoned building rooftop, but you know that’s just dumb of me.  

Terror is waiting on the front stairs of Ian’s house.  Ian doesn’t look pleased to see him.  First thing out of Terror’s mouth: “I went to look at that place on Ashland.”  (No “Hi”, no “Are you ok?”, no “Do you want to talk?”)  Ian says, “You what?” clearly pissed off.  “It’s got good bones (that’s the 2nd time in the episode they use that real estate buzz phrase-Fiona described the building to them thusly-it sounded out of place both times).  I signed a lease.”  Hold the phone-I’m really going to need to see a printed out job description for Terror’s position at the youth center ASAP.  He has the authority to sign binding legal/rental documents for the place?  He doesn’t even have a valid ID!!!  But I digress.  Ian’s response is, “Fuck, Trev.”  He just sounds exhausted.  Terror says, “She’s right about you not being yourself lately.  (Dafuq?  You’ve known him all of ten months maybe?  And you’ve NEVER let him talk/express himself?  What do you know about Ian being “himself”, asshole?)  This isn’t the mountain you’re making it to be.  Are you taking care of yourself?”  Is he asking if Ian’s having anonymous sex with randos who worship him?  WTF is Terror’s definition of Ian taking care of himself?  Ian answers, pausing between each word, “Yes.  I am taking my fucking meds.  Now get off my porch, dick.”  Terror literally steps in front of him and gets right in his face (since he’s standing a step or two up the stairs) and says, “It is my job to do what is best for those kids and that place on Ashland will make their lives a little bit better.”  So?  THAT’S the appropriate response to whatever Ian is going through?  ANOTHER goddamn lecture about Terror and what Terror does?  Like I said, Fiona didn’t say, “Rush right down there, this offer is only on the table for the next few hours.”  Terror’s all about what he has to do for those kids in need while the guy he claimed he “really loved” is in a world of goddamn hurt?  Leaving Mickey out of it all together, Terror still comes off as an uncaring, self-centered asshole.  Terror doesn’t care about Ian, it’s so clear in this (and many other) scenes.  Why does Shameless keep forcing this on us?  All Terror has been saying the last few episodes while Ian has been trying to help the kids is that Ian’s doing it wrong, and that they are Terror’s kids.  Even bringing up his job like that-if he wanted to make the point to Ian that he’s been trained to help them and Ian hasn’t-why not say THAT instead of going from, “Your sister’s right, are you taking care of yourself?” to pounding his chest and crowing about “his job”?  He’s the one that let Ian in to help the kids, now all he ever does is act like Ian’s not good enough at it.  

The last scene is Ian in his bed.  Fiona comes in to talk to him, they both say they’re done fighting.  Ian oddly says, “I shouldn’t have wasted my time on that bullshit.  Not when there are larger concerns to consider.”  Fiona asks, “Larger concerns like what?”  He takes a breath like he’s about to answer, pauses,she gives him a searching worried af look, then he just changes the topic, “Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?  I was almost asleep in here.”  Instead of saying something like, “I’m your sister, you know you can tell me anything, I want to know,” she just says, “Night, Ian,” gets up, walks to the door, pauses, says, “I love you, you know.”  Close up of Cam’s face, another pause, he finally says, “You too.”  She leaves, there’s another close up of him-his eyes move from the door to staring at nothing.  

So, when I was watching it live, that scene totally freaked me out.  He seemed like he had something bad to tell her, but just couldn’t yet.  I WANT to believe this is all leading to him mourning and missing and not coping about Mickey, but this stupid show never wants to remember Mickey and sure as hell doesn’t want to act like he ever meant anything to Ian but a puppy love Ian outgrew.  So I doubt that’s where they’re going.  I also don’t think it has anything to do with Monica because the show feels like they’ve “done” that story and it’s over.  I was wracking my brain about what Ian’s larger concerns could be referring to, and upset that we’re going to have to wait two weeks to even begin to find out.  Because another possibility is that they’ll never say what the hell he was referring to because that’s what this show is now-brand new every week.  There’s still no fall out from him going into the old couple’s house-was that just a throwaway joke?  That, just like Kev dancing at the Fairy Tail, Ian would do anything for that money?  

On The Walking Dead’s mid-season finale it was revealed that Carl had been bit by a walker in an earlier episode and that’s what this bed scene was reminding me of-that Ian had something really awful and life-altering happen, but he just can’t bring himself to tell anyone yet.  

Anyway, thoughts were spinning around in my head, and then I saw this:  https://youtu.be/ZiFnSVqu1D4   and it was a cold dose of reality, just like those buckets of water falling on Fiona’s head: by the next episode all will be fine.  Ian’s found a new passion project, Terror is on board, holding his Bible for him and supporting his man, even if he does claim to be Ian’s ex-Ian’s quick to “reassure” us that they’ll start banging again soon.  That ugly smile on Terror’s face made me want to cry.  

Now I’m thinking that maybe all “larger concerns” is gonna turn out to be that one of the youths told Ian off camera about the gay conversion program at that church-or that maybe instead of being on Mickey’s rooftop Ian was wandering around the city and saw a flyer or a poster for it.  So when he’s talking to Fiona he’s already moved on from topics of real estate and his contemplating taking on organized religion.  Because this show is that badly written nowadays.  True loyal fans keep remembering how the show was back in the day and could read a lot into the emotions played by Emmy and Cam in that final scene and were naturally worried that something personal is going on with Ian, but it probably is just him setting off on the path of becoming a zealot with a new cause with much-or all-of the reasoning happening off the page and off screen.  LAME.  

They could’ve so easily set this storyline up over time-Ian gets back from leaving Mickey to find not only has he lost the love of his life, but also his mother, his one sympathetic source when it comes to the lifelong condition he still doesn’t have a handle on, it would’ve been the most natural thing in the world for him to look to religion for answers.  But no, we had him chase after Terror like he’s Ian’s only relationship option, and in the next episode he’s got a Bible with dozens of post-it tabs marking the pertinent passages he needs to take on a pastor instead.  Somewhere between telling Fiona he was almost asleep and the next episode he’ll have read and highlighted the entire Bible and quasi-broken up with Terror with the promise that they’ll get together again soon.  Because they can’t make Terror and Ian just friends.  They’re really going to make us suffer thru this on again, off again tedious bullshit?  Why?  

One more note on how much they let happen that we don’t get to see: WHEN DID TERROR FIND OUT IAN HAS BIPOLAR DISORDER?  Was it when Fiona was asking Ian about his meds?  Was it long ago?  Was it before or after Ian ran off with Mickey?  WHEN?  First they just spring it on us that Terror apparently knows all about Ian being a teen prostitute (which the audience still doesn’t even really know about-all we got was retconning because the last we knew, Ian told the porn producer he couldn’t turn tricks at the club), now this?  They waste so much time on scenes that go nowhere and that don’t advance the story at all-they can’t give us a little bit of Ian actually talking to the guy he’s screwing?  Hell, they don’t even give us scenes of them screwing....