#i have my walkman and discman = music
Text
i could literally stop using my smartphone rn if i wanted to
#i have my walkman and discman = music#i have compact cameras and a camcorder = ....camera#i have a dsi and i might get a PSP = games#i have pens and a notebook = notes app#like. i could get a flip phone and i would be fine 🤷🏾♀️#i mean i wont stop using it cause its very convenient but sometimes i like walking around with tech that doesn't require#i charge it (apart from the dsi)
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
what bands/albums do you think the losers would have on cassette/vinyl??
or what songs/bands from the 80s-90s do you think the losers would put on their mixtapes they give to each other??
#im looking to expand my music taste#and i have a walkman and discman#so i want to get more cassettes and cds and records#so let me know your hcs!!#richie tozier#eddie kaspbrak#mike hanlon#bill denbrough#ben hanscom#beverly marsh#stan uris
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
I had one of those days that makes me realize how much of my work experience existed before my current staff entered the workforce.
The employee who is 25 years younger than myself asked a simple question today - one that I'm sure she didn't realize would make me laugh.
She was answering a publisher inquiry about photographs that were sent for publication. The publisher wrote back to say that the author of the book had sent low resolution images and to please send high resolution versions.
My employee was desperately trying to find the images. We manage a repository of 4 million+ digital media files, and a sister unit manages a repository of at least that amount, plus several million undigitized film negatives/positives, but she could only find the low resolution images in either repository. So she asked for assistance.
I took one look at the year the images were taken and started giggling.
I had to explain to her that these photos were taken by a digital camera. In 2001.
I had been working here for 11 years when these photographs were taken. I remember them, I remember the event, I remember that our place of business was still officially using film because it would take several more years for digital cameras to be of a sufficient quality to match film quality (I believe we finally switched over to fully digital around 2005/6). But these photographs were digital only because event photography was usually taken for the business records and therefore did not have to be preservation quality (not that we called it that back then, but you get the point).
Hell, even most of the photographers that captured the events of September 11, 2001 were still using film. Film was the standard medium back then.
So I informed her that this "low resolution" was the maximum the camera could output, and what the book publisher has IS the highest quality that ever existed. Thanks to our metadata, we know it was taken by a Fujifilm digital camera with a whopping 3.1 megapixel chip.
Then I did the math. This employee was...six...when these photographs were taken. She wouldn't have ever experienced a world without the Internet, much less digital cameras, computers (and 5-1/4 inch floppy discs! cartridges! zip disks!), and maybe even cell phones. I doubt she had a walkman and probably not even a discman, given that the iPod debuted in 2001, and other digital music players were already on the market.
I do think it's funny, though, that I watched this whole rise and fall of analog and digital media consumer hardware happen, and so my understanding of the technical capabilities of the era are so internalized that I expect everyone to make the same inferences. Gotta check my assumptions. :)
And yes, I am old.
#way to make me feel old!#digital media history#digital preservation#media preservation#i can't get over how fast media technology has changed tbh#it's almost mind boggling
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Spring Awakening Fandom Tag
(By @winter-asleepening )
1. How were you introduced to the show?
2007(?) OBC sountrack on compact disk gift from a friend.
2. Seen a production live?
My honest answer is going to get me in trouble around Question 17, isn't it.
3. Dream role/character you relate to most
Ilse Neumann.
4. Favorite male character
Moritz.
5. Favorite female character
Ilse. Is that redundant with Question 3? Martha, then.
6. Deaf West Revival or Original Broadway Cast?
The OBC soundtrack got me through a very rough time in my life, but as far as the cast goes I'm going to say the Deaf West revival cast. I'm glad it was revived, I'm glad that cast is cast in that cast, and I'm glad they're the introduction for a new generation of Guilty Ones.
7. Favorite song
I love them all equally.
8. Least favorite song
...I don't care for Mirror Blue Night.
9. Favorite quote/line
I'm more of a melody person than a lyrics person.
10. Favorite TV performance
Deaf West Touch Me THEY TURNED INTO A BOAT
11. Favorite cast member(s)
I don't really play favorites with cast members, I just try to find what each new actor brings into the role.
12. Favorite cast member moment
I don't really follow the behind the scenes anecdotes either, but Jonathan Groff forgetting the lyrics to Left Behind except for "all things" is as inspirational as it is horrific to imagine going through. If he can get through that and live to tell the tale, then I can get through a bad day.
Also every time Michael Arden says, "All my best ideas come from [ Andy Mientus ]" is like d'aww they're cute together.
13. Do you write fan fiction?
In this fandom, no, I'm more of a reader.
14. Do you make fan art?
I could.
15. Do you cosplay?
Not really...I don't like the late 19th century fashions? I'm more of a Merveilleuse type (no bra no corset just Spirit Halloween chiton).
16. Don’t do Sadness or Blue Wind?
Those are two halves of a whole song!
17. Word of your body or the Reprise?
OBC I did not like the Reprise because even through the Discman (... that's a Walkman for CD's) I had the sense that it was a "comic relief" moment that relied on the existence of gay boys as the joke.
The Deaf West production kept a sense of respite and relief, and some comedy in the relationship dynamic between Ernst and Hanschen rather than playing on preexisting stereotypes...even though it didn't change a word of the script in that scene, which is amazing on a text analysis level like what happened who used the Captain Planet power ring with the power of heart in this scene, what sorcery is this?
So it depends, because the non-reprise Word of Your Body does a narrative job—Melchior haters can feel free to hate, but I can understand what the musical version was trying to go for with his character, and Word of Your Body was part of that.
Groff's Melchior came off more smarter-and-better-than-you but sort of giving up his pretensions in the process of seduction, and I can understand why that aspect might look appealing.
Doyle's Melchior doesn't have that "he's a ruthless boy but maybe i can change him"—I think he plays Melchior as more sad and desperate, and putting that energy into studying is how his Melchior thinks he gets a handle on his own feelings.
McKenzie's Melchior is an oafish, bookish 14-year-old boy trying to act smooth as he condescends to a Deaf girl. He has as much primal sexual energy as a newborn beagle puppy, which to be clear is none at all. I think that can be endearing, that he doesn't really know what he's blathering about in terms of life experience.
Wendla's a consistent constant performance-wise, all three versions I think balance out to a constant average...so it's really the Reprise that determines which one I like better.
OBC Reprise was very much worse than OBC Word of Your Body...but, Deaf West Reprise was a little better than Deaf West Word of Your Body and a lot better than the OBC Reprise. But I like the OBC Word of Your Body better than the Deaf West Reprise, at the same time that I like the Deaf West Word of Your Body an equal amount as the OBC Word of Your Body, contextualized comparatively being different than the chronological context that defines its vibe in an individual show's run time.
18. Touch Me or My Junk?
My Junk as a tune — but the Deaf West Touch Me did turn everybody into a boat, that was kinda cool.
19. Explain the song of purple summer.
Ilse recovered from her trauma and now owns her sexual identity, despite the history of everyone in her home and community doing their worst to her in ways that directly targeted that very intimate part of her. Her story is not the main plot of the show, but the fact that she survived and found personal definition means she now has her own voice on which to carry the wisdom of her life. That will be what heals and inspires others. Red or pink sunsets plus blue evenings make the sky in summer purple. At the end of the day, there still is beauty in living.
20. Explain the song of purple summer (wrong answers only)
Butterflies scatter ergot fungus while they fly around, so everybody thinks that everything looks purple this summer. The sky is purple. The rain is purple. The corn is purple. The horses are purple. The fungus is eating everybody's brains. They're all going to die.
7 notes
·
View notes
Note
8, 20, 33, 49 for the music asks 💖💖
8: Songs that you could listen to forever and never get tired of?
Hysteria by Def Leppard
Stand Up (Kick Love Into Motion) by Def Leppard
La Bamba by Ritchie Valens
Little Dreamer by Van Halen
Waiting by Mammoth WVH
20: What type of music device do you own/use?
I listen to music on almost every format, I use Spotify, have a record player, cd player, a walkman, discman, (I have my mom to thank for giving me her two old ones) and a small boombox.
33: If you had to listen to only one band for the rest of your life, which one would you choose?
That’s such a tough question but if I had to choose I think I’d go with Def Leppard. One, because they’re one of my biggest obsessions (and have been for a while now) and two, because I feel like there’s a lot of range in their discography where I don’t think I’d get bored since there’s a wide musical range across all albums.
49: You are locked inside a closet with your favorite band member for an entire day/night. What do you talk about/do?
I would be locked inside with Joe so here’s my realistic answer:
I’d want to get to know him on a more personal level, but I’d also love advice from him. Specifically on how to have a positive mindset to achieve your dreams, because clearly he’s done that. More than anything I’d just love to hear all he’s gone through and how it’s shaped him into the person he is today. Like sure you can read up on him and the band but I feel it would be more true to life hearing it from the source. Maybe after that we’d fangirl about some of the bands we both like, exchange recommendations and all that stuff. And lastly I wanna get a hug from him🥹💗
Unrealistic answer: I wanna FUC-
#thank you for the ask💗#now i wanna meet joe even more now#just thinking about it makes me want it more🥹#joe elliott#def leppard#ritchie valens#van halen#mammoth wvh
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 2, Episode 7 ("Like Mother, Like Daughter")
The episode opens with Rory and Lorelai insulting each other's taste in music.
LOL, poor Dido, what did she ever do to you Lorelai? #IWantToThankYouu
Dido reference AND a Discman in the first 5 minutes of the episode. Be still my little Millennial heart.
Rory sitting down to enjoy two slices of white bread with no filling (served on fine china) is one of my favorite moments from this series and another fine example of Rory's bizarre eating quirks.
Given that in a previous episode Rory was practically eating a Thanksgiving meal in the cafeteria, this must be some sort of special theme day at Chilton. Prison Lunch Day. Or Public School Lunch Day.
Rory's Two Slice Tuesday is unfortunately interrupted by the guidance counselor looking to have a little chat. GC won't say why she needs to see Rory but she needs to see her as soon as possible, then tells her this discussion is going to be long enough to make her late for her next class.
I once again am envious of Rory's visible lack of anxiety/blissful naivete. I want to live in the clouds like Rory does. No "We need to talk, but not yet, and I won't tell you why, so eat your lunch and just let the anticipation stew the whole time" in the history of ever has had a good outcome but Rory is just smiling and strolling along her merry way and somehow not hurking up her Prison Sandwich.
I had such a visceral reaction to this one-time, unimportant Guidance Counselor character that my review began to turn into something of a trauma dump and I had to reign it in, a bit.
As a 12-14 year old whenever I saw a "counselor" or school psychologist approaching to "have a little chat" while I was alone (because I was being tortured by bullies and deeply depressed and these same psychologists were doing fuck all to combat it), and they would always use that same sickly sweet, phony, passive aggressive voice and language like this lady here. My fight or flight response would kick into high gear.
Rory Gilmore? OUR Rory Gilmore? Social behavior?
Not Tristan? Or Paris?
Alright lady, you need to leave my poor friendless girl alone. Let her chill alone with her bread slices and fruit cup and her novels and let her listen to Dido on her Discman without interference.
Oh Lady, you did NOT just come for my girl's Discman. DISCMAN. Walkman is for CASSETTE TAPES.
Lady: When we write recommendations to a University on behalf of a student, the student's social skills are a big part of it.
Lemme get this straight, Rory is constantly being harrassed (and her sexual purity being bought into question) on a near daily basis by Paris, Tristan, Madelyn and Louise and so homegirl here decides she's better off chilling alone at lunch and it's HER fault and she won't get into college?
Ayup, this is pretty much of a mirror of my own life in the same time period. Schools just did not give a fuckall about student's wellbeing and mental health and put the blame on innocent students like Rory.
*more war flashbacks*
But in the real world, Rory would get eaten alive socially in a big college, so that much is true.
Alright lady. Kindly, from the bottom of my heart, lovingly...get bent.
Rory: "Loners are those guys you see walking around wearing out of date clothing, they tend to carry a duffel bag, with god knows what inside!"
Lady: Loners come in all shapes and sizes, even pretty girls.
Whoa, lady!!
Rory: I don't suppose there is a Walkman/ reading lunch time club I could join is there?
Me: Form one and I'll join you. Us friendless losers trying to avoid passive aggressive guidance counselors need to stick together.
Lorelai: What does she expect you to do?
Rory: I guess that means going up to strange kids at school and saying "hey, mind if I awkwardly butt in where I don't belong and don't want to be?"
My heart breaks for Our Rory Gil.
Lorelai: Chilton is a cult!
Yeah, maybe, but your beloved Stars Hollow is also a cult, which is compromised of many smaller sub-cults.
Kirk Job: Car Mechanic
Lorelai: How dare she do this to you?
Rory: It wasn't just her, it was Charleston's suggestion.
Of course it was. These Passive Aggressive Counselors and their superiors making lives of their already miserable students even more miserable always worked in teams.
I just want to point out again (sort of repeating myself here) that this lady did only minimal probing into WHY Rory might prefer eating lunch alone.
Kirk: I couldn't help but overhear. I ate lunch by myself and carried a duffle bag and I turned out just fine.
R&L:
Sure he's a grown man with night terrors who lives with his mother, but for a small town with limited employment opportunites Kirk somehow manages to find work whenever he needs it and seems content with his life (and eventually finds love), so don't despair girls.
Lorelai wants to go down to Chilton to give PAGC and Charleston a piece of her mind, good luck with that.
As I'm watching this show for the fourth time, I'm a jaded chain smoker and no longer blissfully naive and expecting that Rory will suddenly propel through the social stratosphere at PAGC's suggestion.
Portrait of author on her fourth Gilmore Girls rewatch.
I already know that by the time she graduates high school Rory has not made a single new friend at Chilton (besides Paris, arguably) OR outside of school in Stars Hollow, and I also know that by the time she graduates college Rory has still not made a single new friend besides Paris (who is more like her wife at that point anyway, and no I don't count those two bozos they tacked on in a desperate move near the end, Lucy and Hailey or whatever the hell their names were, who cares), and by the time she's 34 in A Year in the Life she still has not made one single friend that anyone is aware of.
Okay, okay, fine, I guess we can count Marty as her friend. But my memories of what actually went on there are too fuzzy to opine on.
Lorelai to Charleston: I'm here to talk about this ridiculous accusation that Rory is a loner and that's somehow a bad thing.
Oh come on, how is it ridiculous, your daughter is absolutely is a loner and an introvert and she only has one friend, one she's known since childhood, but yes, it's not necessarily a bad thing as long as she's happy.
Lorelai: I raised Rory to do what she wants, as long as it doesn't hurt someone else.
#JusticeForLindsay
Rory could have had a nice new friend in Lindsay...
Unlike most Chilton parents, Lorelai has to take precious time off from work at a real job to meet with HMC to discuss a pressing matter involving her daughter, but HMC instead admonishes Lorelai for her lack of parental participation at the school and pressures her into joining some dopey club with a bunch of dopey Chilton Moms.
Lorelai leaves the meeting. Rory was barely mentioned. Lorelai goes home to Rory and embellishes a lie/jokey joke about how hard she fought HMC in Rory's defense (she did no such thing, because she was barely given the chance to speak by HMC).
Two Slice Tuesday With A Side Of Fruit continues.
Ugh, there's Francie (Francine?) in the back. Fuck. I did not care for this dumb mean-girls/Puffs storyline they had going through most of this season. Another one of The Agonies I'm not looking forward to.
This must be the fancy table, where nobody is partaking in Two Slice Tuesday.
I think the Chilton administration should look into more pressing issues, like why this high schooler is a 45 year old named Patricia.
#gilmore girls#rory gilmore#lorelai gilmore#Denise Rewatches Gilmore Girls#Gilmore Girls Season 2#every gilmore girls high school extra is over 30#they don't fuck around at Chilton and leave people back#like mother like daughter#white bread#prison lunch
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
That's purely personal, but i listened to a singer on spotify and his song are a huge part of my childhood.
When I was a kid, i often got the electronics that my 5years older sister had.
She had this old walkman, and biy did she listen to a lot of music with that thing.
One day, on Christmas, she got a discman, and she gave me her old walkman. At the time I was like 7-8 and was ecstatic to get this!. But problem, I didn't really have any tape of my own to listen to. I usually listened to whatever was on the stereo.
My mom gave me a tape of an artist that became popular when she was younger. So to try the walkman out, I listened to this artist.
I listened to that tape so much...
The artist is a monument here in France, one of the artists people will suggest if you ask for suggestions. There are many great artists, but he is a big one.
He had different eras more or less directly linked to his state of mind at the time, so you can hear very funny songs, to heartfelt songs (songs he made for his wife, daughter, and a few years ago, granddaughter), to very provocative songs.
He sometimes plays a role of a punk and rebel in some of his songs that are frankly funny, but a lot of his songs are also criticizing society as a whole. How people livevin the suburbs and how they are treated,
How governement isn't good sometimes. How he mocks movements... he isn't always here to say what we want to hear and yet people love his songs
He is by far my favourite french artist, and even if he indirectly insulted me in quite a few of his songs, i still love his work. I thank mom for giving me this tape to try out
I didn't listen to his songs on loop for 3 weeks straight. Nope. No siree!
His name is Renaud, and now I wanna listen to his songs again XD.
#personnal#will delete later#even to this day#even though he started his carreer in the 70's#people love him#unfortunately now he is 71#and his depression and addiction problems took their toll on him#he doesn't have the same strength anymore#but his words are still good
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
@thecashandandrogyny hi here’s my little collection! i apologize in advance for how terrible the photo quality is and for how long this post is going to be
starting off with stereos👍👍
THIS asshole……i got it for 50 bucks at a garage sale & for breakfast it chewed on my copy of london calling on tape. the only part of it that hasn’t fucked up so far is the cd player which is pretty much all i’m using it for at the moment. wise advice from the guy who runs the local phys media music & records store: never buy a stereo/walkman/whatever if the brand is someone’s name. for the meantime it’s a shelf for my vinyls and hat collection
next is her. the cd player doesn’t work quite right (skips songs & butchers the quality iirc). when i was still using my mom’s old stereo as my main one i’d use this little sony to fast forward and rewind tapes, since those buttons didn’t work on my mom’s. it’s kind of just sitting there on my floor now !
to be honest i haven’t used this one yet but! she’s pretty & looks brand new. i think it was like $12 at a thrift store. score
the shitty ass photo doesn’t do this one justice it’s so cool looking in real life!!! it only plays tapes but it plays them well and it’s actually really small & very lightweight. i wish it ran on batteries too instead of cord only but oh well. i fucking love sanyo’s old music products
now my discmans…..
the two on the right i’ve had for a while and work beautifully. i usually only bring the sony out and about with me because it actually fits in most pockets and bags. the jvc is such an unfortunate shape that it’s pretty much impossible to bring anywhere. sad! & the one on the left i got last weekend at a garage sale. it works fine it’s just super fucking dirty and i gotta clean it still
e walkmans
the first one i ever got & my favourite & the oldest out of all of mine (1982). but i don’t think that even needs to be said because the sheer size of it gives away its age. compared to my hand it’s massive LOL my only gripe with her is the audio quality… it kind of sounds like you’re trying to listen to a stereo on middle volume while its like 30 feet away from you. there’s nothing wrong with it though its just wear and tear! i got it at a value village with the case and all + the leather straps attached to it are so you can carry it like a purse but i don’t dare try and hold it like that out of fear of the straps breaking
this one is somewhere in the mid 90s range + the second one i ever got + my second favourite! it’s waterproof and pretty much built for running with so it’s the one i usually bring with me out in public! like most of the walkmans i have it has a belt clip on the back (unlike the previous one where the belt loop is a part of the vinyl case) (i have to literally remove my belt to take that thing off which is a little embarrassing to do in heavily populated areas)
i originally got one of a very similar model at a thrift store but there was something wrong with it that made it so you could hear this clicking sound every time you’d play a tape. you could hear it even if the volume was way up so i passed it on to a friend of mine who liked the clicking sound and was in desperate need of a walkman. then i found this one on ebay for around the same price & it was in the box which was cool! nothing really special to say about it…….and i do have the headphones pictured on the box
and this is my most recent score!! ft dookie by green day. i got it at a local vintage shop. it’s old enough that it doesn’t have a rewind button which is kind of neat
now kind of miscellaneous stuff i have laying around!
radio headphones LOL. same story as that one sanyo up above: found og at a thrift store, and maybe might have broken it by accidentally leaving it in my bag for too long aand it got crushed by my books. it still worked, the plastic just broke so it didn’t quite sit right on your head & was uncomfortable to wear. a friend of mine willingly asked for them and then i found this pair (same exact model) on ebay and got it for like $15 cause i really liked the old one
these are kind of cool!!! if your car has a cassette player and you want to listen to a cd, you can put that tape into the player and connect the cord to a discman/cd player and it’ll play! vice versa for the other one: if your car has a cd player but you wanna listen to a tape, you plug that into the electric cigarette lighter and the cord into a walkman/tape player. these would be twice as awesome if i actually had a car. Lol
then this little portable radio! it’s kind of fun to walk around the house seeing where the signal cuts out & where it gets stronger. the metal antenna actually gets massive when you fully extend it
these are cool too!!! not pictured is the plastic piece that goes between them but i do have it (you can kind of see it behind the portable radio in the last pic). you put your walkman in the plastic piece and connect it to the speakers and it basically turns your walkman into a custom little stereo
and last but not least my dad’s walmart brand mp3 player he gave to me. it has a shit ton of faith no more, david bowie, and glenn danzig songs on it and it doesn’t stay alive for more than 30 seconds if it’s not plugged in
anyway that’s all i’ve got at the moment thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk about them!!!!
#truly my prides and joys#i think i’ll give this post a tag for future reference#💿#also unless otherwise stated like the ones i got off ebay every one of these i got secondhand!
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
At this point I've chosen to just buy old discs and cassettes. I don't like half of what's being put out anyways, why not buy a few secondhand Now That's What I Call Musics?
That's not to say I'm ditching streaming, I'm not always gonna have a walkman or discman on me, it's just not going to be my all-the-time.
I'm not gonna shame you if you wanna stick with streaming, but I'd still like to encourage you all to try this out too. I'd also advise against piracy is you go this route, not just because it's illegal (this is tumblr, nobody cares about the legality of piracy) but also the fun of the collecting and hunting
0 notes
Text
Thirty, Flirty and... Thriving?: An Aro (Short) Story
How does it feel to be 30 and a perma-single aro surrounded by people in romantic relationships? It's not as funny as it sounds. (Warning for general negative thoughts).
1990 doesn’t seem so far away, but, in reality, three decades have passed since then. That year, the Human Genome Project officially began, the Hubble Space Telescope was launched, the first web server was created, the World Wide Web was funded and the first content web search engine was introduced. That was also the year the official demolition of the Berlin Wall began and when the first episode of Twin Peaks aired. 1990 is also the year I was born.
Thirty years are a lot and that’s exactly the amount of time I’ve been alive (biologically, not mentally and certainly not emotionally. Those have felt like twice as long). Since 1990, I’ve seen the economic crisis in my country, the devaluation of our national currency, protests and rallies, some of which I was part of when I was only 7 years old.
I saw our football team winning a gold medal at the Olympics, the rise and fall of pop punk music, the evolution from walkman to discman to mp3 player to streaming. I’ve owned Beta videotapes, DVD’s and a Netflix subscription. I was there when the first Spider-Man movie premiered in 2002 and I’m still here after our third live-action Peter Parker on the big screen (Andrew Garfield is the best, by the way. You can’t change my mind).
I got a college degree, I’ve traveled to another country, attended four music festivals, learned a language different than mine, written 40 fanfics from start to finish, changed jobs, successfully moderated a blog for four years and, currently, I’m taking care of my mom. I got through the influenza pandemic in 2009 and I’m now trying to survive the COVID-19 pandemic. I’ve made friends, I’ve lost friends and, this year, I said goodbye to the last of my grandparents. I could’ve probably done more, but I’d said it’s been an eventful life; however, compared to what other people around me have done, it seems like nothing.
In the last six years, my sister moved in with her boyfriend, two of my friends got married and two others had babies —those last two points only in the span of three years. Everyone in my inner circle has settled down except me and I can’t help but to feel betrayed by a generation that promised me we were going to be different, that we weren’t going to settle for normal, that we were going to be a revolution.
All these promises of long-lasting and committed friendships were forgotten once adulthood fully hit us and all the expectations about family and kids were hot on our heels. It was then when they began to cancel plans, when the texts became scarcer and meeting twice a year was considered almost an excess.
“True friendships are those in which you can spend years without talking, but still love each other as if nothing had happened”… Do we really have to be satisfied with that?
I know it’s not fair to blame them for choosing a life that doesn’t include me in the way I’d like, after all they maintain other friendships just fine, but then I wonder if it’s really a me problem or if it’s a circumstantial problem.
Is this a consequence of my inability to form long term relationships of any kind or it’s just that I can’t relate to them anymore for lack of shared experiences? Because here’s the thing: me being aromantic actively makes my relationships different from others. Not stronger, not better and not purer; just different.
When you’re 30, aromantic and perma-single, maybe you can talk with your allo friends about your jobs, but you can’t talk about dinner with your mother-in-law. You can talk about not making ends meet, but you can’t talk about the baby’s first words. You can empathize, you can be happy for them, but you can’t truly relate.
You become a listener and not an avid participant, and that breach between you and your friends turns you into someone who lives on the margins (to borrow Hannah Gadsby’s wise words) with little to nothing to share in a world that prioritizes the impossible dream of the nuclear family.
How many conversations about the latest episode of your favorite tv show can you maintain when there’s more important things to talk about, like the husband who’s looking for a house he can pay for with his new raise? How many times can you attempt to talk about random things before the conversation drifts to the baby that hasn’t stopped crying since his teeth started to erupt?
How much of this disconnection can you keep ignoring before you realize there’s nothing keeping you together?
It’s not that what you care about doesn’t matter, but when the world is so strongly ruled by the amatonormative idea of companionship, it is difficult to relate to something that’s not relevant to you.
Your life suddenly feels meaningless and, for some, it really is. You are stuck.
My life, as an aro person in a country that’s generally quite closed-minded, is different. For me, there’s no one I can consider a partner for life. My goals aren't focused on marriage or motherhood, or anything remotly close to what society considers normal. This is when the challenge to celebrate my own victories appears, because they're not what people expect of me.
At 30, it's not enough to have some success at something you love; what good is it when you have no one to share it with? And you start to be too old for the many other things you want: Too old for friends, too old for fun, too old for new experiences, too old not to have figure out life already. Too old to find someone that feels the way you do.
Am I asking too much? How do you know what the limit is when the rules were specifically designed to exclude people like you? Who gives you the guideline to communicate your emotional needs effectively without them being dismissed? How similar to them do we have to be to be included?
The goal is, then, to learn how to recognize my own value, despite following a path no one else seems too fond of. It's saying "It's great your kid has taken his first steps. I've finally made some progress on that story I've been working on for six months" or "Jeez, it's fantastic you went on that trip for your anniversary. I've recently managed to catch up on that podcast I've wanted to listen to for a long time."
The dream is to form a community. A diverse community integrated by true conviction and not because the people in it had no choice due to the high cost of living around the world. One with people that say “This is what I want” and not “This could be a lot worse.” “I chose you”, not “This was the last thing I had”.
How many chances of getting that do you still have left as you age?==================================
==================================
Back in February when I turned 30, it really hit me that I've lived through a lot and things have changed so much since I was a kid, so I decided to write this little something for @aggressivelyarospec‘s #AggressivelyArospectacular week.
I hope this... expands your horizons? And, if you're aro and over 30, hit me up with a message; together we're stronger. Fuck, do it either way if you're younger, I'm so up to talk about all this with you guys.
#aggressivelyarospectacular#essay#my writing#aas*#aa*#long post#really long post#general negative thoughts#maybe I'll delve further into this topic later on#I think it's important we talk about this
68 notes
·
View notes
Note
wanted to send this ask as an update bc i mentoned ordering my own discman under ur poll but it came in today and im having so much fun with it like im buzzing listening 2 music from the cds i have is so fun and i've only had it in my hands for like 2 hours atp but it's so fun and i love it <333 my little red walkman i wanna bring it out with me for classes now
oooo what songs/albums r u listening to?? I'm glad ur having loads of fun with it!!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
viii. We saw the first snow
NAPOLEON BIRTHDAY PROMPTS 2020- Day 8 - garret
Prompt: “What’s gotten into you?”
Ao3 link in source!
Spending the night in what is possibly the coldest place in the whole mansion, in wintertime, was downright stupid.
“This is stupid.”
Napoleon had nothing wise to say about her statement, this time. He took the remaining few steps to the garret’s door, gas lamp in his right hand, her hand in his left. He opened the door and it creaked in a familiar way, tugging a smile on his lips. He closed the door behind them and set the gas lamp on the wooden bench.
She buried herself deeper in her coat, glad that she chose to wear it, and moved closer towards Napoleon.
“This is stupid!”, she tried again.
He searched for her hands, grasping them softly where they were hidden inside her pockets, and brought them out. He led her to sit on the bench.
“Look up?”
She did as he said, and with that her lips parted, a small gasp slipping out, “Oh my.”
Napoleon locked his gaze on her for a moment, tried to see if the stars were truly reflecting in her eyes or it’s just his imagination.
“There are so many of them…”
The night was clear, and now she understood why he was so persistent about coming here. He once said that winter nights bring the best sights.
“There are.”
She snuggled closer to him, because, she could use some extra warmth. And because she was suddenly not that opposed to the idea of staying here for a bit longer.
***
The following night they were at the garret again. The sky had been clear through the day for the most part, but it seemed that the clouds had pilled overnight.
The nostalgia for the summer nights was strong. It’d been a while since they stopped coming here due to this and that - the day shortened but it was busy nonetheless; one night the creeping coldness slipping from the dusty window made them seek the warmth of the fireplace in Napoleon’s room, and they abandoned their fortress.
Now they were armed with warm clothing, and suddenly the conversations started to flow again like old times; the chill air kept them awake. Her eyes, today too, shined, in lieu of the starts.
“…After the gramophone comes the radio. It took some decades to find a way to broadcast but it was a key invention for the war. It was its main purpose, though you can tell how short it took people to establish music stations as well…”
Napoleon hummed, absorbing the information. He was leaning on his arm by the window with her sitting opposite him. Listening to her, many questions popped in his head, but he would save those for later – he didn’t dare stop the flow of her speech. It was warming his heart so much to hear her talk so passionately like this, and the topic was arousing his curiosity all the same.
She toyed with the end of her braid as she went through all the bits of knowledge she could recall, enjoying how patiently he waited to hear more.
“I think it’s still wartime when we get to the magnetophon, too…it uses something similar to the cassette tape for what I know. The cassette tape is basically something about this big”, she gestured with her hands, “and it’s... like a film tape, it has the audio information rolled on it similarly”, she waited to see him nod because as sure she was about his capability of absorbing information, some of the things she used to describe were new terms for him while others she’d already talked about.
He nodded.
“Right. So now we’re in the 60s. In the next few decades, we have a bunch of new devices, like, lots of them. And they’re not all that much alike too.” she snapped her fingers, “Music gets portable.”, Napoleon nodded again, that being something he’d already come to acknowledge, too, “and we still have the cassette tape and the vinyl when something even smarter comes out, the disk. Those are still used in my time. From there we have the discman, walkman, the MP3 player… and what, finally the iPod I think. People stream music mainly from their phones, though. That’s why you don’t see me bringing a separate device from the 21st century especially for music.”
Napoleon hummed in agreement, tapping the fingers of his other hand on his thigh. “It seems most things ended up their evolution with the phone. Do you think they would be separated in their own devices again someday?”
“Hmm, it's hard to say. I mean, what about photos? The phone makes it possible to photograph, but the quality is nowhere close to this of the camera that is especially for this purpose. If they end up improving phones, they would start decreasing their mobility…”
“I don’t know about that. I mean, you can’t tell me they wouldn’t find a way to put all that in something this small,” he put his pointing finger to his thumb to gesture, “if they want to.”
“You’re absolutely right! My point is, you see how most of those inventions take place after the 60s, right?”
“Yes.”
“The generation that grew up in those times is quite different even from their 10 years precursors. You come to see people who can use technology with no problem at all and some that can’t learn to, no matter how hard they try. It’s… amazing how you grow up doing something as simple as listening to music and you’re caught into several technology eras, and suddenly you adapt to everything.”
Napoleon smiled.
“That’s really interesting to hear. I mean, I think it’s the same about most things. There will always be a difference between the elders and the new generations when it comes to adapting.”
“Yes. And the difference is huge when you think about how people born in the 50s are still out there in the same world that now has smartphones. But, listen here. If every next generation adapts better, maybe that means that the borders will blur at some point, am I right?”
“Quite possible.”
Napoleon thought about it, turquoise gaze falling somewhere past the border of the window.
He widened his eyes.
“Close your eyes.”
“What? Why—“
He moved closer and put his hands on her eyes, then took her hand, urging her to stand up from the bench.
“What’s gotten into you??”
“Shh. Let's walk you out of there and then you can open them.”
He led her carefully to the door, then opened it for her, all while making sure he blocked the sight to the window.
She only rose an eyebrow at him before taking the task of going down the old stairs, supporting herself on the walls.
They took the stairs down to the second floor, but Napoleon didn’t stop there as predicted, and they took the ones to the first floor too.
Curious but enjoying it, she followed suit after him. She tried to guess: “Midnight snacks?”
“Maybe later. Come.”
He went to open the front doors that led outside the mansion, only stopping for a second to snatch his scarf from the hanger.
“Are you crazy? It’s past midnight and if someone hears the door they’ll freak out—“
He pushed the door very slowly, preventing much noise, and got out of the way, so she can see.
Snowflakes fell from the skies. They were visible near the garden lights, they danced fast in their silent chase one after another.
“Come out in the snow with me?”
She looked at him, huffs of hot air were coming from his mouth, his cheeks already rosy from the crisp air, and perhaps something else.
She grasped his hand and smiled in the earnest. The smile grew in laughter, a burst of careless laughter that rang like bells in the silent night. It wasn’t enough before he joined her in it.
17 notes
·
View notes
Note
What was your first memory (form childhood?) when you realized that music can make something special to you. I call it musical orgasm, it has nothing to do with sex as such but feeling of fulfillment is the same. So in other words, if possible please describe your first musical orgasm.
It must have been early, because I do not remember it. What I can tell you is that when I was around 3 or so, some friend of my Mum’s started organising these chamber music evenings with pretty high profile musicians in our town, and because we always got tickets for free and my parents both wanted to go they just took me with them. They appearantly got alot of criticism for it, because it was somewhat late for a child that age, and people thought I would disturb. I never did - I either fell asleep on my dad’s lap or listened very attentively. I do not remember this, but appearantly alot of the times the musicians noticed because it was so strange and talked to me afterwards and showed me their instruments.
I started to be the “flower girl” when I was about 5, I had to walk up on stage once they were done and hand the customary flower bouquets to the soloists, curtsy and everything. My mum sewed these really pretty dresses for me, can you believe it? It’s like that was a different person. I remember being super nervous every time, I didn’t know about actors or football stars or what was on the radio, so these people were the biggest stars in my universe.
I got my first radio when I was about 7 because I would. not. shut. up. about it. It looked like this (actually pretty sure it was that exact model). I started to listen to music so much, my parents started to worry, especially because I would lay down on the carpet really close to it and turn it quite loud, so they worried about my ears. But my dad was already quite sick at that time and I think they eventually just had bigger worries, and I don’t remember having to defend that a whole lot. I listened to whatever came on the radio, and my Mum’s Deutsche Grammophon Tapes with the yellow labels.
When I was around 10 I was deemed old enough to take the 50 minute Busride from our home to my school by myself. I think my mum wanted to soften the blow and gave me my first Walkman because of that. Shortly after that became a Discman. It didn’t have anti skip, so everything sounded like a broken record on the bus, but I still took it religiously. I had these rechargeable batteries, and 6 of them fitted into the charger. I went through all 3 pairs each day and if I ever forgot to charge them one night that was a very, very, very bad day. Things were really difficult for me at school, and often I just listened to music in my breaks just to not have to hear what people were saying about me. It wasn’t allowed of course, but I got very inventive in hiding it beneath my clothes and my earbuds under my hair and stuff.
Besides from radio stuff I hardly remember, that time I listened mostly to bands my brother showed me, most noticeably a german folk-rock-pop band by the name of Paddy Goes To Holyhead, who wanted to bring Irish folk to germany but with a twist. I still listen to them today:
https://youtu.be/Rmv1gG_tLQQ
youtube
When I turned 12 we got our first TV, and suddenly music had this additional visual element. I’d always drawn alot to music and MTV and Viva was everything I ever asked for. I spend HOURS doing nothing else, and watched everything even if alot of the music I didn’t even like. But I think what was a real turning point for me was the moment Funeral of Hearts came out. I just couldn’t look away. I kept waiting for it to come back on so I could record it on VHS. That album was the first one I went to get in the store the day it came out. I actually made a sole friend at school because I drew Heartagrams on my jeans, and they noticed it, and then introduced me to all those other bands, like stuff that would only play late or seldomly on MTV , like Die Ärzte, and In Extremo and such (and Rammstein!) Their Dad played in a Metallica cover band, and suddenly there was this entire new world that looked so cool and seemed to be exclusively build for misfits like me. Via them I met my first boy in a band(tm). He was the drummer, and now there were gigs too. I technically was too young, but I didn’t look it I guess and because my friends were a little older they just smuggled me in. I met more people that way, first time I even had any real friendships at all. First kiss, first love, first everything happened against this backdrop of really shitty garageband gigs and parties.
https://youtu.be/Wdt1pzddYTI
youtube
Another turning point for me was when With The Lights Out came out. That’s a Nirvana Boxset released in 2004, and it contained all these demos, and I had just recently been introduced to Nirvana by some of the guys, and it opened this insight into how that kind of music was made and that even my biggest stars kind of sounded just as shit as my friends at some point, and I think it just made it feel like aomething that really belonged to me. I got it for christmas, which shows that while my mum was kind of a shit neglectful mum still was sort of cool too. One of my favorite Christmas presents ever, I still have it.
The rest, as they say, is history. I don’t always like being asked about music because I have so many moments with it, so many ways to answer questions like “what’s your favorite song” etc. I always feel like it’s to big to be answered like that, you know? Music is my sanctuary and the most important thing in my life, even if I love my job, or my family or whatever. I could not exist without it. An exemple: according to Spotify, I spend around 2700 hrs of listening to music in 2019. That’s a third of an entire year - and I don’t actually listen to music so much when I work because it needs too much concentration (the music, not the work). Plus, I additionally listen to CDs and Vinyls so spotify can’t even track that. That’s alot of time.
I recently got a pair of trendy Marshall headphones because my studio headphones plainly make me look stupid in puplic, and they fold down small enough to fit in my jacket’s pocket. (Which is a relief, because to be honest wearing heafphones around your neck all the time is a little impractical.) The other day I met a friend, and she picked me up at the trainstation. She looke me over and said something like you look so different today, and riddled over it for like 10 minutes before she suddenly goes “oh Anna where are your headphones!!!” In my pockets, is all.
Maybe that tells you all you need to know about me.
#i think this went completely out of hand#but thank you so much#this ask made me feel really seen#and I need that today#this is such a good place to exist#thank you tinnike
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Does anyone else listen to an album and remember exactly what they were doing when they fell in love with it?
I’ve been listening to The Number Twelve Looks Like You a lot recently, mostly “Worse Than Alone”. I had moved to Florida from Virginia a little over a year before it came out. I moved down there to be with my girlfriend, who broke up with me two months after doing so. I had asked her if she was leaving me for a friend of her’s and she assured me she wasn’t. A month later, they were dating. I spent the next seven or so months in a depressive haze. Not necessarily suicidal, but being angry every morning that I woke up and hadn’t died in my sleep. Not throwing myself in front of cars, but I wouldn’t have moved if one ran up on the sidewalk at me. On top of that, I didn’t have any friends (yet) and I worked at an Applebee’s (To this day still, the worst job I’ve ever had). Slowly, things got better. Made friends, started being more outgoing and I met someone (Although we did break up, we’ve stayed friends and they remain one of my best friends to date). I remember reading online that the new Number Twelve album had come out. The closest local music store was down in Tampa, almost 2 hours away, so I drove down to the Best Buy in Spring Hill to get it on CD. I’ve never really connected with them on a lyrical level; My avidity for them has always been for the music, specifically the guitar and drums. Nothing against Jesse Korman or Justin Pedrick; They have fantastic singing/screaming voices. And they’ve never had a bad bass player, though they’ve had a few, but Jon Karel’s flawlessly intricate drumming and Alexis Pareja’s dizzying guitar work is something I never tire of. When the stress of existence got to me, I’d drive out to Fort Island, put my headphones on and stare out into the gulf. Just let my mind go blank; the only thing processing was the music playing in my ears. The instrumental interludes of “The Garden’s All Nighters” and “I’ll Make My Own Hours” can still untangle the negativity in my head. The tribal drum solo at the end of “Retort, Rebuild, Remind” was unlike anything I had heard at the time, and such a unique choice for a metalcore album. Aside from that, it’s just a banger, through and through. My mp3 player had broken a while before I bought the album and my discman skipped whenever I went for a walk with it in my pocket so I bought a walkman and taped it. For me, it’s one of those rare albums that you don’t want to skip any of the songs on. It hasn’t gotten old in the 11 years since it came out and I don’t doubt it ever will
#don't mind me folks#just ramblin'#pretty sure I didn't use those semi colons correctly#whatever#rambles
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
I just had a weird nostalgia for finding a certain cassette tape and popping it into my walkman.
I...haven’t owned a walkman in twenty years. And I’m not going anywhere?
My cassettes are mostly gone. If I could find it on spotify I donated it. I was downsizing. I now have a spotify folder called “Ghosts Of My Cassettes (and missing CDs)”.
I do still have most of my records though, granted they are sitting unused in a box.
I had one terrible discman that skipped horribly if it MOVED. Shortly after that I had a car with cassette player and rarely ‘walked’ anywhere listening to music.
I now have a rather old mp3 player but rarely go anywhere, but when I do I plug it into the cassette player in my car. Which is what a lot do with your phone now, right? Using spotify through the car stereo?
I also just realized the entire four years of high school I never thought of taking it to listen to music on my half hour walk home (and yes, part of it WAS uphill - but not both ways!).
I can still grab that or a mixtape though, I’ve remade several on my spotify lol
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Music I / 1984 - 2009
I stood on the stairs leading to the apartment. The song was still playing through my earphones and I knew that once I go through the door it would be another world. The music would stop.
Maybe I could just stand here and listen till it's done, I thought. Maybe I could play it on the home speakers once I get in. No. I can’t.
Now I'm thinking about it, and can't enjoy it. I pause the music and reach for my keys.
———
She hates my music.
No, she says she hates music. Who the fuck hates music?!
------
I always had a pair of earphones in my ears. Since I was eleven. An uninterrupted soundtrack that was accompanying my life, whenever I could get away with it that is.
At the very beginning all we had were headphones. Bulky, clunky, headphones with a metal connector and flat over ear foam covers.
I remember how it felt when I got my first earphones though. They came with a black Sony Walkman. My ears were way too small for those plastic earbuds, and the foam covers added more bulk and friction. But when I could get them just right, they drowned out the noise. I was alone with the music.
My first Walkman — well, a nameless portable cassette player, it wasn’t a Sony — was my older sister’s. I took it with me to school, without her permission. After a couple of days it was confiscated. By someone at school that is. Fascists. Yes, I was eleven, but it’s not like I was listening in class (That wouldn’t come until high school). On the school bus, and during recess. But they still took it away. It was off-white, had only three buttons (for some reason the technology to rewind seemed more challenging than that to fast-forward), and the door was held shut by two rubber bands. But it was mine (my sister’s), and I loved it. They took it.
The fascism didn’t come as a shock. At age six I came to school with a pair of canary yellow plastic wayfarer style sunglasses with mirrored multicolored lenses with the word Star written across both of them in graffiti style script. It’s difficult to describe, but it was back in 1990, and they were cool. Extra cool for a six-year-old. I think I pulled them off. I’m pretty sure I pulled them off. I remember them so vividly. I loved that yellow. Maybe that explains my lifelong affinity to yellow.
Again, they were my sister’s. And again, I took them without her permission. Pretty ballsy move for a six-year-old. So, I took them to school. And on the first day, an agent of fascism called Madame Badee3a confiscated them. I was wearing them during recess. Fuck her and her fucking tan stockings. They went up a few inches below her knees and seemed too tight. She probably had varicose veins. Good! I hope they hurt. I would imagine she’s dead by now. I think the world is a better place.
She never gave them back. I don’t remember if I confessed to my sister. I probably didn’t.
They gave the cassette player back though.
She used to like music. She used to LOVE music. We fucking bonded over music. We might not have become friends (two decades ago now) if it weren’t for music. I judged people based on shoes, and taste in music. She had great taste in both.
------
By the time I reached high school, I had progressed through a couple more Walkmans, a Sony Sports Walkman (oh that sweet yellow), a bulky Discman, a round cooler Discman. And finally a super thin silver metal Panasonic CD player that was so thin that it had it’s own flat removable rechargeable batteries. It was too thin for even AAA batteries. I loved that thing. It was a SL-CT 780. Google it.
------
She had many CDs. And she had a cool CD player as well. A Panasonic Shockwave. Rugged silver metal and blue plastic highlights, seemingly indestructible. With weird looking headphones that hung around your neck with a vibrating part on the back of the neck that vibrated with bass. Panasonic were the shit back then.
I judged people based on their technology. She had great technology.
She lent it to me. For a couple of months. If that’s not a sign of teenage love, I don’t know what is.
------
As I progressed through the tiers of technology, and the genres of music, it became more necessary to keep it playing at all times.
I used to listen during recess and on the school bus. Now I listen in class. Thank god for hoodies. If I didn’t have a hoodie on, I would pull the earphones through my sleeve and put a hand on my ear as if I’m resting my head. Music in one ear beats no music.
By then I had started playing guitar. Now I could play the fucking soundtrack. Holy shit.
------
How can she possibly hate music? People who hate music don’t get cool state-of-the-art Panasonic CD players.
Maybe lending to me was a sign that she wasn’t serious about her music playback devices?
Was it all a lie?
She sang with me though. I’d play guitar and we’d sing together.
She’s a hell of a singer. Can you hate music and be that good a singer?
------
I always had a pair of earphones in my ears. Through college, every single day. MP3 player by Creative. First iPOD. A Nano (I even got her an iPod Shuffle on my first trip back home from college). And then iPod Touch after graduation, with my investment banking sign-on bonus. Then iPhones took care of that from then on.
I had a pair of earphones in my ears all the time.
We got married. Played guitar and sang at the wedding. Ended with an hour of Karaoke with friends. The soundtrack continues. Now we’re united forever and it’s time for our sountrack. On the first day of our honeymoon, we were exploring the streets of Barcelona. I put one earphone in my left ear and gave her the other to put in her right. She didn’t want it.
OK.
I’ll keep one in my ear though. Just like high school. Let’s keep walking.
She lets me do that for a while. We had an argument about it. She said it was ridiculous. To put it away. I refused.
Of course it was ridiculous. But she was taking away my music. After an hour of lovely but awkward strolling, I stopped enjoying the soundtrack. I took the earphone out. She unplugged the soundtrack.
——-
She Madame Badee3a’ed my music.
Now she says she hates music.
Who the FUCK hates music?!
——-
12 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
stephhannes
is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?
pockpop
❀ let me treasure you ❀
midnight-noise
Mood-swing God
tigerishroar
Cuando menos me lo espere.
crow-1977
Schmucker Security