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#i guess classes would help with things like forcibly learning shadows and anatomy and composition
opens-up-4-nobody
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1 year
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#ugh. im feeling chatty today. probably bc i feel kinda weirdly anxious. like when u can Imagine bad things happening in detail
#and like it feels like ur wait for it even tho its in ur imagination? whatever. anyway. ive been watching a lotta
#stuff on like professional artists and idk maybe im just in too deep on science academia but i dont. i dunno the culture
#seems so weird to me? like what does one do in art school? i guess i took a lot of art in high school but my teacher was kinda trash
#all we did was paint realisticly using a grid and i hated that. but i image ur supposed to exercise different styles and medias? how tf
#does that get graded? i dunno. i haven't taken any uni level art classes. i should tho. id probably like it
#its weird tho. anything that tries to give structure to art stuff seems so weird to me. like u go to school for science stuff to build up
#ur background knowledge and i guess u can do that with art but it feels different. i guess bc ur training muscle memory. i dunno
#i like to imagine an au where i go to art school but i legitimately cannot fathom doing that. cannot fathom a life outside of my toxic
#relationship with academia. i dont even kno what i would want to specialize if i went down that path. maybe illustration
#bc it makes me happy when ppl say my style looks like something out of a kids book. i dunno
#i guess classes would help with things like forcibly learning shadows and anatomy and composition
#maybe i just need to make art friends. like what is ur life like? im too much in a science bubble
#i guess going to art school also just devotes all ur time to art. not just tiny pockets of time between all the things u have to get done
#god. i can only imagine the panic of procrastinating an art project and physically not having enough time to finish it
#thats how i felt with my masters thesis. there was just physically not enough time for me to fix my code in all the ways i needed and rew
#rewrite things. but i finished it somehow
#ugh. god. i have things i need to finish coloring. i will finish them today. i will
#i hate coloring. but colors r so pretty ;_;
#unrelated
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