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bee-kathony · 6 years

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McTavish & Beauchamp Chapter 3: On the Road

Claire leaves Leoch to collect rent with the men, she feels her chances of returning to Craig Na Dun slipping away.... is that a bad thing?

Chapter 1: Firsts Chapter 2: Decisions Chapter 3: On the Road

CHAPTER 3 | ON THE ROAD

The next few days I was busy attending to people with injuries or illnesses that didn’t live near a healer. I also accompanied the men while they hunted and chased a wild boar in the woods. One man was not so lucky and the boar ended up killing him, the only thing I was able to do for the poor man was offer him comfort in his last few moments.

I was in the surgery now and that’s what Dougal was thanking me for.

“I wanted to thank you, personally for uh what you did for poor Geordie up there on the hunt.” Dougal said, holding a small glass bottle in his hands across the room.

“In truth I did nothing,” I said honestly, “I wish I could have helped him.”

“Ye did. You took him to a peaceful place. And that’s all any of us can ask when we pass. So… thank you.” He said quite genuinely and I was surprised by the tenderness that Dougal was exhibiting towards me.

“You’re welcome.” I replied and waited for him to say something else, when he didn’t I said, “Well if there’s nothing else, you’ll have to excuse me I have a lot to do here in my dungeon.” I said rather sarcastically.

“Well, that’s why I’m here lass.” Dougal said, turning now to face me. “To set ye free from this dank room.

I shook my head, confused. “What do you mean?”

“You’re comin’ on the road.” He said.

“On the road?” What the hell?

“I’m leavin’ tomorrow and I’m takin’ you wi’ me.” Dougal said.

“Taking me where?” I crossed my arms in front of me.

He looked down at his feet, “Travelin’ through Mackenzie lands, collecting rents. Colum doesn’t travel so… visiting the tenants and tax men that can’t come to the gathering, that falls to me. And… attending to a wee bit of business here and there.” He looked from side to side, something in the way he said “business” struck me as odd.

“But why me?”

“I think it would be wise,” Dougal stood and walked over to where I was standing, “to have a healer along. Specially one that does well under strain. And there’s a lot of that on the road.” Dougal crossed the room and made to leave, “So, that’s the business settled. Mrs. Fitz will have suppa ready and you don’t want to incur her wrath by comin’ late…. We leave at first light.” He left me there, wondering what I was to do next.

I didn’t know where this journey out of the castle and on the road would take me. What opportunities would arise. Would I be able to return to Craig Na Dun and go back to Frank?

Did I want to anymore?

I only hoped that wherever we were going… that Jamie was going to.

The next morning I was delighted to see Jamie in the group of men. He came over to me to help saddle my horse and strap my bag down.

“Mistress Beauchamp.” He smiled and gave the horse a pat, his hand brushing against mine. Why was I suddenly so nervous?

“Good morning Mr. McTavish, I hope you slept well.” I said loud enough for the rest of the group to hear and then leaned in and whispered, “I’m glad to see you Jamie. I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here.”

He grinned and looked around at the other men, too busy saddling their own horses and then slipped his hand around my waist, “Perhaps we can find time to…” he raised his eyebrows and then I assumed he tried to wink but it was more of a blink really.

“Oh yes. Perhaps we can.” I smirked; would this give us an opportunity to do what we both had been longing for since we came together those many nights ago? Jamie looked down at me, his eyes lingering on my lips and I brought my hand up to my mouth. I heard him grunt deep in his throat and then someone was calling his name.

“Aye, I’m comin’.” He sighed and squeezed my waist, helping me onto my horse.

Everyone climbed on their horse and we were off. I looked behind me at Leoch, I didn’t know if I would ever return to see it and if I did would it be back in my own time?

_______________________________________________________________________

Jamie rode ahead of me for most of the journey that day so I spent most of my time talking with Ned Gowan, a man who studied law at the University of Edinburgh and was coming along to help with the rent collecting. He had two bags to hold the money in, one I assumed for the actual rent we would be collecting from Colum’s tenants and the other one he didn’t explain what it was for but I had my suspicions.

It was actually quite nice to be out, riding a horse in the Highlands. A welcome change from the stuffy dank walls of Castle Leoch.

With every kilometre we traveled I felt my chance of finding my way back to Craig Na Dun slipping away. I had no idea where I was and I knew I would never find it on my own.

After a few hours of traveling we made camp for the night. The men set up tents, bridled the horses and began to cook what looked like a skinned rabbit.

I sat off to the side on my own as they told lewd jokes around the fire which didn’t offend me at all but what did hurt was when they began to speak in Gaelic, making me feel rather ostracised. I was a “Sassenach” after all, I couldn’t expect them to include me in their conversations but it didn’t help me feel like I belonged.

Jamie must have noticed how uncomfortable I felt and he came over and handed me a bannock, “Dinna worry what they’re saying lass.”

I took it and picked off a small piece, “They hate me.”

“Och, they don’t trust ye,” He crouched down to his knee beside me, “Well, maybe Angus hates ye, but he hates everyone.” He smiled and did his best to cheer me up which managed to lift my spirits a little.

“And what about you? Do you think I’m a spy for the British?” I asked him. We had been intimate physically within a matter of weeks but we were still strangers, unknown to one another in so many ways.

“Nah, but I do think there are things ye’re not tellin’ us and I know you thought about leavin’, during the gathering.” I opened my mouth to protest but he raised his hand stopping me, “Lass I know ye didna go to the stables just to find me, as much as I want to believe that.” He smiled and I blushed.

“Well I suppose you could be right.” I met his gaze, those blue eyes burning daggers into my heart. “But I was never actually going to leave.” Why didn’t I want to tell him the truth? That I had actually thought of leaving on that horse, leaving him, Jamie, behind.

“Although it still weighs on me… out here in the open. I could leave anytime I wanted to and none of you would ever know until morning.” I crossed my arms over my legs.

“Aye, weel, I wouldna wish to see ye go, ye know that Mistress.” Jamie placed his hand over mine, “I know ye are keepin’ things from me but what ye’ve given me…” He leaned in and whispered into my ear, “Ye’re body. I know I can trust ye, I canna believe ye would go around doing that wi’ just anyone ye ken?” A mischievous glint caught in his eye and I turned my face to hide my smile.

“Thank you for trusting me Jamie.” I smiled, “It’s been a rather long day.” I said and set the food I could not eat on the ground and stood, wrapping the blanket around my shoulders tightly. “Goodnight Mr. McTavish.” I squeezed his hand, still holding onto mine.

“Goodnight Mistress Beauchamp.” Jamie let go of my hand, and I left him to find my tent.

We rose early the next morning and continued to the next town to collect the rents. We accepted bags of grain, animals ranging from pigs to goats and whatever anyone else could manage to pay. Some people were giving all they had, surely we could give them some grace?

It weighed heavy on me to see these hard working people give up their livestock which they needed to survive on, to feed their own children.

To be honest I was a little bit fed up with the eighteenth century life and the way people were treated here. Perhaps that’s what drove me to walk over to our cart and untie the goat someone had paid their rent in.

Rupert immediately chased after me, “Hey, hey, where do ye think ye’re takin’ that.”

“Back to her owners, the family needs her.” I tugged at the rope now caught between me and Rupert.

“The goats ours, we’re takin’ her wi’ us.” Rupert shouted, causing a crowd of people to stop and look at us. “The hell you are.” I shouted right back.

“Ye’ll be givin’ me the goat.” He demanded. “Let go! There’s a baby that needs milk.” I huffed and pulled on the goat’s leash.

Dougal walked over then, “Stop ye’re bletherin’ woman, the beast is payment for rent. Fair and square.”

I had also had enough of Dougal just now, “So you’d let a child go hungry?”

“The goat goes wi’ us.” Dougal turned the crowd of observers, “A Sassenach” and motioned drinking with his hand, making everyone laugh.

Just then a man walked over to us, he seemed to be a Smith in the village, “Madame is everything alright?” He was also British, just like me.

“I’m sorry?” I asked, almost taken aback to hear such a familiar accent after all these weeks.

“May I be of service?” He asked again.

“Aye,” Angus said, “Ye’ll keep ye’re nose out of our business.”

“I was speaking to the lady.” The man replied.

Dougal stepped in, “The lady is a guest of Clan Mackenzie.”

“Do you treat all your guests this way?” The man looked from Dougal to me, unsure whether to take me away from them by force.

“Eh, bugga off.” Angus chimed in, always the charmer, “Go home laddie, and suckle on ye’re ma’s tit.”

The man looked at me once again, still deciding whether to continue in this little altercation but turned and went back where he came from.

“That’s it. We’re leaving.” Dougal said.

_______________________________________________________________________

That night we ate in a tavern in the village. Dougal spoke the people there in Gaelic, he was speaking with such passion, a speech and cause he obviously cared very much about. But I didn’t know what he was saying.

From what it looked like though, Dougal was taking money from these people and keeping it for himself. Money I’m sure Colum would never see a penny of. This only deepened my dislike for Dougal. What made me grow to hate him further was when he walked over to Jamie and suddenly ripped his shirt, exposing the scars on his back for everyone to see.

It took everything in me to not get up out of my chair and spit in Dougal’s face. How dare he do that to Jamie? Expose what is a private and painful memory to complete strangers.

I barely talked to the rest of the men as we continued on our journey. Jamie kept to himself after Dougal had exposed him like that. A few small smiles throughout the day but I could tell something was eating him up.

Jamie was right however… we didn’t know much about one another, whatever we had shared between our bodies was still there but with every passing day that I could not touch or kiss him I wondered if it was just lust, a passing emotion or something more.

Dougal’s shady business was enough to make me want to leave and tough it out finding my way back. I couldn’t admit I had feelings for Jamie but he was the only reason I stayed now.

One night however, as I sat in yet another tavern and watched Dougal give the same passionate speech, I heard a word I recognized.

Dougal had said “Jacobite”. Frank was a historian which meant by association I had heard a lot about certain time periods that Frank would obsess about. The Jacobite Rebellions being one of them, his direct ancestor, the nasty Black Jack Randall having fought in the battle of Culloden in 1746.

Suddenly my perspective changed, I was beginning to realise that the activities Dougal and his men were involved in, weren’t criminal. They were political, he was using the shocking display of Jamie’s scars, not to frighten his audience but to stir outrage against the British. Dougal was raising money for a Jacobite army.

I contemplated this newfound information as I sat by the fire one night. Everyone had fallen asleep but I heard voices rise out in the darkness. I looked over but couldn’t see anyone and so I walked over to where the voices were coming from.

“Kinsmen or no’, I dinna owe ye this.” I heard Jamie say to Dougal.

“I seem to recall a certain oath of obedience as long as my feet rest on the lands of Clan Mackenzie.” Dougal replied across the way from Jamie.

“I gave my word to Colum, not to you.” Jamie huffed back at him. I crept closer, peering through brush.

“It’s one and the same lad, and you ken it well. Outside of Leoch, I am Colum’s hands, head as well as his legs.”

“A case of the right hand not knowin’ what the left was up to.” Jamie almost spit out. I had to agree there with Jamie. I was almost positive Colum knew nothing about Dougal’s political affiliations.

“The Mackenzies, the Mcbjorns… no one can force them to give against their will. But we have somethin’ in common. We want our King back where he belongs. Don’t you?” Dougal asked Jamie.

“You have more to gain from a Stuart throne than I do. If you don’t want to save your own silly neck-“ Dougal said, his voice rising.

“My neck is my own concern!… and so is my back.” Jamie said angrily, rushing towards Dougal. I could tell from his posture it took everything in him not to strike Dougal.

“Not while ye travel with me sweet lad.” Dougal said and no other heated words were exchanged. He turned and left Jamie there, steaming with rage.

Jamie turned to the nearest thing and punched a tree several times. He only stopped when he heard the sound of my footsteps come closer.

“He’ll do that again. Use you like that” I said to him.

“Aye, it gets him what he wants ye see.” Jamie faced me and covered his hand with his other, his fingers brushing his now bruised knuckles.

“And you let him.” I walked closer and sat down on a log near the fire, pushing my skirts behind my legs to conceal more warmth.

“He’s my uncle. A man has to choose… what’s worth fightin’ for. As ye ken well.” Jamie said, closing the distance between us and sitting beside me.

I smiled and reached for his hand, I raised it to my lips and kissed each injured knuckle gently. He winced slightly but didn’t pull away.

“I understand now… I think.” I ran my fingers over his hand and held it in my lap. “What Dougal is trying to do… for the Jacobites.”

“Aye, I didna think ye understood before but I didna want to drag ye in this mess, that’s why I didna tell ye…” He stared at his hand in mine.

“I’m sorry I didn’t speak to you. After that first night Dougal ripped your shirt. I should have gone to you, but-“ I looked up as Jamie brought his other hand under my chin.

“Nah, lass, it’s fine ye ken. I was too angry with Dougal myself. I’m afraid I woulda been more of a burden to ye had ye come to me then.” His thumb traced along my jaw.

“When do you think we can be alone?” I asked, the feel of his touch sparked that pull I had felt towards him.

He smirked, his thumb now tracing along my bottom lip. “We’re alone now Sassenach.”

I flicked my tongue out and licked the pad of his thumb and bit it gently. He laughed and pulled it quickly away, shaking it like I had hurt him badly.

“I want you Jamie…” I grinned, “But I can’t do that with you out here in the woods… with ten other men only feet away.” I stared at him, almost afraid he would say damn the men and push me to the ground and take me right then. That thought did arouse me more than I wanted to allow myself to believe.

“Och, ye’re right. I think in a few days we’ll stop at a tavern in one of the towns and stay there. Instead of sleepin’ outside like we have been.” Jamie now pulled my hand to his mouth and kissed it. “Then, Sassenach.”

“Best get some sleep.” Jamie placed my hand in my lap and stood, helping me to my feet.

“Well try not to hit any more trees.” I laughed and rubbed his arm.

“Dinna worry… trees are safe, Sassenach.” Jamie smiled and leaned in to kiss my cheek and left to his own tent.

How could we be this formal when he had already been inside of me?

I told myself that while he had not be able to control himself that night at Leoch, and neither had I, he had managed to regain some of his restrain. It was sweet really, how kind he was, not at all how I pictured men of the eighteenth century to act towards women.

I had experienced the attentions of eighteenth century highlanders and Jamie’s attentions were far more flattering.

While I wished we had waited, that our first time had been more stretched out, there was something to be said in our heated joining. All the tension from our time spent together, wedged tightly on the horse, our kiss by the fire that first night at Leoch, it had led to a combustion we could not contain any longer. Soon we would be able to appreciate our coming together.

Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ. Here I was thinking about appreciating Jamie’s body, it had been almost two months since I had arrived and the amount of time I spent thinking about Frank and returning to him was dwindling with every stolen glance at Jamie. Every brush of his fingers against mine, and with every thought of his body joined together again with mine. I slept fitfully that night. Eager for what was to come.

_______________________________________________________________________

I saw the men in a different light the next day, not criminals but rebels. I wished I could tell them that they were on the losing side of history. That it was all a pipe dream. The Stuarts would never unseat the Protestant King George the Second but how could I tell them that? These proud passionate men, who lived and breathed for a flag of blue and white.

It was another day of travelling to the next village. But this journey was different, we came across two men who had been hung up with a “T” carved into their chests for “traitor”. Even I knew this was the work of the redcoats.

Dougal told us to take them down and wrap the bodies. We couldn’t leave them like this. We buried them as they should’ve been and a few men spoke a final parting word. That night Dougal was filled with a new sense of passion when he spoke and to be honest I felt my self wanting to see a change.

After supper I said goodnight to the men, I felt Jamie’s eyes on me the entire time as I walked up the stairs to my room. How long would it be before he came to my room? My heart was pounding as I laid in bed, waiting. Perhaps Jamie was waiting for all the other men with us to go to sleep.

I heard thuds against my door and decided to get out of bed and investigate.

I nearly tripped on a large body sitting right outside my door as I kicked it, “What on earth!” I shouted and loud Gaelic curses came from the large mass.

“What are you doing outside my door?” I said, trying to hold back giggles.

“I was waiting ye see, I wanted to make sure know one came to ye’re room…” I raise my eyebrows at him. “Besides me” He said quietly.

“Why not just come in? Why lay in front of my door?” I asked him. If he wanted to sleep with me again he had a funny way of showing it. After all that talk of being alone again.

“The taproom’s full with townsmen half gone wi’ drink. I was worried some of them might venture up here in search of…well, I didn’t think ye’d care all that much for such attentions from them.”

“After the events of today, I doubt any of them are feeling any kindness towards and Englishwoman.” Jamie really was the kindest man I had ever met. Trying to protect me from the very thing I hoped to be doing with him in my room and hopefully soon. “I’m sorry I stepped on you.” I stifled a laugh, “Well come in Mr. McTavish, you can at least sleep in my room and if anyone tries to come in, you’ll already be there to protect me.” I stepped aside to let him in.

“Sleep in ye’re room? Wi’ you? But Sassenach, you’re reputation…” He smirked, walking through the door and shut it gently behind him.

#mctavish and beauchamp #jamie mctavish #jamie fraser #claire fraser #claire beauchamp #outlander #outlander fanfic #mclairefras

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dramoor · 6 years

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’“When our Lord and great God and Savior Jesus Christ was, in his goodness, working many wonders, as it is recorded in the sacred Gospels, and when his reputation was spreading everywhere, Agbar the Ruler of Edessa heard of them and wanted to see Jesus Christ with his own eyes, but was unable to do so because he was suffering from incurable diseases. For a black leprosy had burst out over all his body and had consumed him, for this reason he was unapproachable and unseen for all his subjects.

Around the time of the Passion of our Lord and God and Savior Jesus Christ, he wrote a letter and sent it by a certain Ananias, ordering him to depict with absolute accuracy his height, his hair and his face, and in short his whole bodily appearance, and to bring him the form of Christ; for Ananias was a skilled painter.

The letter was as follows, word for word:

Agbar, Ruler of the city of Edessa, to Jesus Savior, the good physician, who has appeared in Jerusalem, greeting!

I have heard about you and about your cures, which are done by you without drugs; for example you make the blind see again; you make the lame walk; you cleanse lepers; you drive out unclean spirits; you heal those who have been tormented by disease over long periods. Having heard all this of you I had one of two ideas: either that you are Son of God, who do these things, or that you are God. So then I write to you and ask you to and to come to me to cure the suffering I have, and then to be with me; for I have also heard that the Jews murmur against you and wish to do you ill. My city is very small but distinguished and adequate for both of us to live here in peace.

Ananias left for Jerusalem and having given the letter to the Lord he gazed intently at him, but, since he was unable to get near him because of the surging crowd, he climbed up onto a small outcrop of rock and at once began to move his eyes while press his hand to the paper and he began to copy the appearance of what he saw, but he was quite unable to capture his form because it appeared now with one now with another appearance and with differing aspect. But the Lord, who knows what is hidden and searches hearts, knowing his intention, revealed what was happening secretly. For he asked to wash, and while doing so he was given a cloth folded in four, and when he had washed he wiped his most pure and divine face with it. Thus his divine form and appearance were imprinted — O the wonder! — on the cloth. This he gave to Ananias saying, Go, give this back to the one who sent you’. He also gave him a letter in the following terms,

Blessed are you, Agbar, who have believed in me, though you have not seen me. For it is written of me that those who have seen me do not believe in me so that those who have not seen me may believe and live. As to what you wrote about my coming to you, it is necessary that I accomplish all that I was sent out to do and, after I have accomplished it, to be taken up to the Father who sent me. And when I have been taken up I will send you one of my Disciples, named Thaddaios, heal will heal your disease and grant you and those with you eternal life and peace, and he will make your city such that no enemy can prevail against it.

At the end he fixed seven seals in Hebrew letters, which when translated mean, Picture of God Divine wonder. [In Greek a play on words: Theou thea theion thavma]

Agbar received Ananias with great joy and fell down and worshipped the Holy and most pure Icon of the Lord with faith and much love, and he was instantly healed of his disease. Only a small patch of leprosy remained on his forehead. After the saving passion of Christ and his assumption into heaven the Apostle Thaddaios reached Edessa and brought Agbar and all those under him to the font, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. When Agbar came out of the water he had been cleansed of the small remaining trace of leprosy.

When King Abgar received the Holy Mandylion (Napkin) from the Lord, he kept it in a gold frame adorned with pearls, and placed it in a niche over the city gates. On the gateway above the icon he inscribed the words, ‘O Christ God, let no one who hopes on Thee be put to shame.’ For many years the inhabitants of Edessa kept a pious custom to bow down before the Icon of the Lord Not-Made-by-Hands (acheiropoiton), when they went forth from the gates. But one of the great-grandsons of Abgar, who later ruled Edessa, fell into idolatry. He decided to take down the icon from the city wall. In a vision the Lord ordered the Bishop of Edessa to hide His icon. The bishop, coming by night with his clergy, lit an oil lamp before it and walled it up with a board and with bricks. Many years passed, and the people forgot about it. But in the year 545, when the Persian emperor Chozroes I besieged Edessa and the position of the city seemed hopeless, the Most-Holy Theotokos appeared to Bishop Evlavios and ordered him to remove the icon from the sealed niche, and it would save the city from the enemy. Having opened the niche, the bishop found the Icon Not-Made-by-Hands: in front of it was still burning the oil lamp, and upon the ceramic tile closing in the niche, a copy of the icon was reproduced. Reports suggest the Holy Keramion was brought to Hierapolis, where it was obtained by Emperor Nikephoros Phokas in October 966 before he besieged Antioch, and then brought to Constantinople on 24 January 967. Other reports suggest these were two different Tiles, with the one in Hierapolis originating from the time of Christ when Ananias was returning to Edessa with the Mandylion and he placed it in between two baked tiles, thus creating the Keramion that way. One tradition also states that the Ancha icon of the Savior in Georgia, which was brought there to escape Iconoclasm, is in fact the Holy Keramion from Edessa. Phokas had the Holy Keramion from Hierapolis placed in the Blacharnae Church in a golden box ornamented with precious stones and later had it deposited in the Church of All Saints. In the eleventh century it joined the Holy Mandylion in the Pharos chapel where it was displayed in a golden capsula suspended from the ceiling on silver chains. When Constantinople was overrun by the Crusaders in 1204, the Holy Keramion became lost to history. This ceramic tile, known as the Holy Keramion (or Keramidion), is honored by the Church on August 16th, together with the Holy Mandylion. ‘We venerate your most pure icon, loving Lord, as we ask pardon of our offences, Christ God. For by your own choice you were well-pleased to ascend the Cross in the flesh, to deliver from the slavery of the enemy those whom you had fashioned; therefore with thanksgiving we cry to you: You have filled all things with joy, our Savior, by coming to save the world’.” (Image: The Holy Keramion (Ceramic Tile) of Edessa)

(Text via IconandLight)

#Holy Keramion of Edessa #Icon #Lord Jesus Christ #miracle #Ruler Agbar #Orthodox Christian

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lgbtloudhouse · 7 years

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The fall of Lgbtloudhouse. A Story based on real events. An au of reality.

Depression. It wasn’t as bad as it seemed, for a certain young girl… at least not in their eyes… Celeste B was a normal fangirl. She would laugh and cry over things people called “for kids”.. Well, it was for kids! And she still was a kid, so she enjoyed the things she liked to do. Drawing, editing, watching The Loud House and obsessing over the characters. She loved the show and it was one of her favorite things to watch. She would make connections with them and pick out things about them that she would relate to. “Ok, come on, Luan is gay as hell and y'all know it.” She said to no one in particular, but just thinking out loud. She would just browse tumblr looking at some of her favorite blogs and the ones she makes friends with. They were one of the reasons she lift her head up and smiled. Until one day. Let’s just say to summarize it, she was mentally unstable and ill. She took meds for it, but she still had her moments. Her weaknesses. Her downfalls. It turned dark.

Celeste was scrolling through one day and came across something disturbing. People were calling her out. She looked closer, confused and worried. “Its just a drawing, get over it!” “Wow, I can’t believe some little kid is getting triggered over a simple drawing. Jump only drew an oc!” “Lmao damn sjw’s crying again kys”

“W-what.??” Celeste felt something hit her heart. Was this really happening? /oh.. well, it’s nothing. I’m pretty sure it’s just some trolls…/ But she’ll come soon to know that it was more than just trolls she was dealing with.

-some while later- Celeste was doing well. Drawing random lil things here and there. Going on tumblr was hard, but she still loved it. …..

“Oh.. oh my GOD!!!” Celeste put her hand over her mouth in fear. What is this… this… thing she’s looking at? “Did.. they… they… drew PORN of me???” She was shaking, trying not to cry. She needed to talk to someone about this.

Her friends. The safe squad.

She opened up her messages.

Lgbtloudhouse: Queenie! I.. I found something, it’s very very disturbing.. QB: what is it? *lgbtloudhouse sent a link* QB: oh my lord.. These trashies don’t know when yo stop. I can’t believe they’d stoop to such a low level. I’ll handle it. For now, block aval0nx and report it. Lgbtloudhouse: ok..

Celeste was sitting in her room, just trying to ignore everything. Why would someone so such a thing to a mentally ill teenager who only wanted some peace? She sighed, and went to bed.

-some days later-

Celeste had a huge headache. Dealing with internet creeps was not going well for her. She tried to ignore it, but each time she would make it feel bad about herself. She still couldn’t believe what happened. She just wanted a break, but she couldn’t.. She didn’t know why, or what was holding her back, but she knew it wasn’t good.

/time to see what’s going on again../ she thought.

“You are worse than cancer. You are incurable, never go away, and torments people for the rest of there life’s to the point where you want to kill yourself. I don’t think I need to explain why for both points.”

“Let’s see lgbtloudhouse use those insults later when she isn’t some snobby kid whos parents probably buy her everything she wants, she thinks the whole world has to bow to her just because she thinks we should. Lgbtloudhouse is just a spoiled brat. You can practically smell the friendlessness and bitch from that kid.”

“Lgbtloudhouse is a cunt.”

“She must be a real dumbass cunt if she thought she won. I will use the word strongly. Dumbass cunt.”

“Queenie is just using lgbtloudhouse. Like a tool. She doesnt care about her feelings”

“We may like fictional incest but for the love of God act better than lgbtloudhouse and safehouse!”

“New comic. Page 1/10. Chapter one: a "Celestial” being.“

/NO…/

/OH MY.. GOD…/

Celeste could not believe what she was seeing. Her mind felt like it was crumbling apart trying to stay stable.

/leave. I’m gonna leave./ she thought.

Upon finding more chaos.. she decided to take a break.

Until one day.

A fellow friend of hers decided to message her to inform her on what has happened. Something that she’d never seen before. Let’s call this guy, "Lines”. No shade or anything negative to Lines. But Celeste discovered something horrific that shook her to the core. He sent her some photos in warning to her.

“There’s something I found online.. and i think you need to see this..”

“Sure, what is it?”

*Lines sent a photo*

“Do the world a favor, and do the n— jig off the nearest tree.” One photo showed a Celeste glancing at a rope along with a Clyde dangling on a tree, dead, in the background. Sucide baiting. Something inside of Celeste broke. She couldn’t feel anything anymore.

“Also…”

*Lines sent a photo*

This is when the worst happened.

Celeste. Her being violated, drawn pornography of her and Lincoln was showed on her phone. Uncensored. With Lynn and Lars, loud house canon genderbents, watching and getting off in the front.

Celeste dropped her phone. Her family was out. She began to shake. Cry. Scream. Tear at her skin. Sobbing and crying hysterically, couldn’t take it anymore. She ran to the kitchen. Threw open the drawer. Grabbed the biggest knife she could find.

She tearfully ran back into her room. She turned off the lights and closed her curtains.

But grabbed a pencil and some paper and began writing.

Dear family,

Let me just explain why you are in this unfortunate situation. As you know, I love the loud house and I began to go on a site called tumblr. I found many sweet and lovely friends on there. Let me just give out their names because I really want my beautiful friends to thrive through this horrible time. They are: queenbean03, fangirl20, brighteronthesunnyside, adh2d, vanillafrappelatte, transfairycosmo, loud-siblings-against-loudcest, thebigcrunchone9, asknightvaleandgravityfalls, underratedhero, phandomtrashnumerouno, spectrumbunny, skwhy, sourbetes, thecyancat, summeroverdrive, hadenohade, kirby-universe, doctorgalaxy101, wonderingaboutwander, lifeismarvelous, tamamajasper, animatedtrash4, Adrianacartoonfangirl, and many other beautiful souls and friends. I’m so sorry this happned. I was going through tumblr and I started to get bullied. First it was insults, then name calling, then death and suicide threats, then drawn porn of me. Tell Caleb (my brother, 6), Ariel (sis, 5), grandma, and the family and my friends that I love them. I love you guys so much, but I can’t take this anymore. Love, Celeste.

She raised the knife over herself. And.. *thump*.

“Celeste! We’re home!” Celeste’s mother Jennifer called out. They brought home cheese pizza, which they knew she loved. They also noticed that she hasn’t been coming out of her room lately and looked noticeably sad. They got some pizza to make her happy again.

“Hmmm. Why are all the lights off?”

Celeste’s dad, Rich, shrugged.

“Maybe she wanted some dark.”

“Yeah, but all of them?”

“Yeah that’s weird. Caleb, go wake up your sister.”

“Okay!!!” Caleb was Celeste’s little brother. He can be a handful, but he’s still her brother. He, like his sister, has autism, adhh, ocd, and is in general very hyper but still loving.

He ran to her door and opened it.

She was laying on the floor.

Caleb ran out to tell their mom.

“Mom, Celeste is sleeping on the floor!”

Jennifer laughed. “You’re so silly Caleb. I’ll go get her.”

She walked over to her door. And screamed.

Laying on the floor, was her daughter Celeste. Dead.

“What the???!?!

She looked closer.. and gasped.

A knife was in her head.

She then saw, this was self-inflicted. Suicide.

-month later-

It was a dark and depressing day in South Carolina. Raindrops covered the graveyard like grass covering land. Despite it being summer everyone felt a chill inside their hearts.

"We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of daughter Celeste B. She was a wonderful spirit and lovely girl. But then the harsh pain of evil came over her in despair. May we all come together and this heavenly soul rest in peace. And may the world have peace in future cyberbullying to stop. And for acts of hate against this lady and other victims of cyberbullying to decrease quickly. Amen.”

It was a shame. Love will be found in all the right places. May we come together and figure out that what you say can have a impact on someone’s life. I am glad I never killed myself. I am strong but weak. Beautiful yet fragile. Loving yet fearless. Now what would you react if this actually happned and I did commit sucide? Love yourself and choose your ways carefully. Love eachother and find peace. I am strong for staying. Don’t give up for light or life. You are loved, my love.

#celeste says

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tpanan · 5 years

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My Sunday Daily Blessings

September 15, 2019

Be still quiet your heart and mind, the LORD is here, loving you talking to you...........

Twenty-fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time Lectionary: 132

First Reading: Exodus 32: 7-11, 13-14

The LORD said to Moses, "Go down at once to your people, whom you brought out of the land of Egypt, for they have become depraved. They have soon turned aside from the way I pointed out to them, making for themselves a molten calf and worshiping it, sacrificing to it and crying out, 'This is your God, O Israel, who brought you out of the land of Egypt!' "I see how stiff-necked this people is, " continued the LORD to Moses. Let me alone, then, that my wrath may blaze up against them to consume them. Then I will make of you a great nation."

But Moses implored the LORD, his God, saying, "Why, O LORD, should your wrath blaze up against your own people, whom you brought out of the land of Egypt with such great power and with so strong a hand?

Remember your servants Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, and how you swore to them by your own self, saying, 'I will make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky; and all this land that I promised, I will give your descendants as their perpetual heritage.'" So the LORD relented in the punishment he had threatened to inflict on his people.

Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 51: 3-4, 12-13, 17, 19

"I will rise and go to my Father."

Second Reading: 1 Timothy 1: 12-17

Beloved: I am grateful to him who has strengthened me, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he considered me trustworthy in appointing me to the ministry. I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and arrogant, but I have been mercifully treated because I acted out of ignorance in my unbelief.

Indeed, the grace of our Lord has been abundant, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. This saying is trustworthy and deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. Of these I am the foremost. But for that reason I was mercifully treated, so that in me, as the foremost, Christ Jesus might display all his patience as an example for those who would come to believe in him for everlasting life. To the king of ages, incorruptible, invisible, the only God, honor and glory forever and ever. Amen.

Verse before the Gospel: 2 Corinthians 5: 19

Alleluia, Alleluia.

"God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation."

Alleluia, Alleluia.

Gospel: Luke 15: 1-32

Tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to listen to Jesus, but the Pharisees and scribes began to complain, saying, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.” So to them he addressed this parable.

“What man among you having a hundred sheep and losing one of them would not leave the ninety-nine in the desert and go after the lost one until he finds it? And when he does find it, he sets it on his shoulders with great joy and, upon his arrival home, he calls together his friends and neighbors and says to them, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep.’ I tell you, in just the same way there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who have no need of repentance.

“Or what woman having ten coins and losing one would not light a lamp and sweep the house, searching carefully until she finds it? And when she does find it, she calls together her friends and neighbors and says to them, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found the coin that I lost.’ In just the same way, I tell you, there will be rejoicing among the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

Then he said, “A man had two sons, and the younger son said to his father, ‘Father give me the share of your estate that should come to me.’ So the father divided the property between them. After a few days, the younger son collected all his belongings and set off to a distant country where he squandered his inheritance on a life of dissipation. When he had freely spent everything, a severe famine struck that country, and he found himself in dire need. So he hired himself out to one of the local citizens who sent him to his farm to tend the swine. And he longed to eat his fill of the pods on which the swine fed, but nobody gave him any. Coming to his senses he thought, ‘How many of my father’s hired workers have more than enough food to eat, but here am I, dying from hunger. I shall get up and go to my father and I shall say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I no longer deserve to be called your son; treat me as you would treat one of your hired workers.”’ So he got up and went back to his father. While he was still a long way off, his father caught sight of him, and was filled with compassion. He ran to his son, embraced him and kissed him. His son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you; I no longer deserve to be called your son.’ But his father ordered his servants, ‘Quickly bring the finest robe and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Take the fattened calf and slaughter it. Then let us celebrate with a feast, because this son of mine was dead, and has come to life again; he was lost, and has been found.’ Then the celebration began. Now the older son had been out in the field and, on his way back, as he neared the house, he heard the sound of music and dancing. He called one of the servants and asked what this might mean.

The servant said to him, ‘Your brother has returned and your father has slaughtered the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’ He became angry, and when he refused to enter the house, his father came out and pleaded with him. He said to his father in reply, ‘Look, all these years I served you and not once did I disobey your orders; yet you never gave me even a young goat to feast on with my friends. But when your son returns, who swallowed up your property with prostitutes, for him you slaughter the fattened calf.’ He said to him, ‘My son, you are here with me always; everything I have is yours. But now we must celebrate and rejoice, because your brother was dead and has come to life again; he was lost and has been found.’”

**Meditation:

If you lost something of great value and importance to you wouldn't your search for it until you found it? The joy of finding a lost loved one, a precious member of your fold, and your hard earned savings to feed your hungry family are vivid illustrations which Jesus uses to describe what God's kingdom is like. God the Father does not rejoice in the loss of anyone. He earnestly searches for the lost until they are restored and joyfully united with the whole community of heaven. Jesus told these three parables right after the scribes and Pharisees, the religious elite among the Jews, expressed disapproval with Jesus' close contact with people of bad reputation.

Sinners were drawing near to hear Jesus Luke in his Gospel account tells us that "tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear Jesus speak" (Luke 15:1). Wealthy tax collectors were despised by the Jews because they often forced the people to pay much more than was due. And sinners, like prostitutes and adulterers, were a scandal to public decency. The scribes and Pharisees took great offense at Jesus because he went out of his way to meet with tax collectors and public sinners and he treated them like they were his friends. The Pharisees had strict regulations to avoid all contact with them, lest they incur ritual defilement. They were not to entrust money to sinners of bad repute, or have any business dealings with them, or trust them with a secret, or entrust orphans to their care, nor accompany them on a journey, nor give their daughter in marriage to any of their sons, nor invite them as guests or be their guests. They were quite shocked to see Jesus speaking with sinners and even going to their homes to eat with them.

Finding and restoring what has been lost Why were many tax collectors and sinners drawn to Jesus? Jesus offered them forgiveness, mercy, and healing and the promise of full restoration with God the Father and the whole community of heaven - God's kingdom of righteousness, peace, and joy. When the Pharisees began to question Jesus' motive and practice of associating with sinners of ill-repute, Jesus responds by giving them a three-fold lesson in the parables of the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the lost son (Luke 15:4-32).

What is the point of Jesus' story about a lost sheep and a lost coin? In Jesus' time shepherds normally counted their sheep at the end of the day to make sure all were accounted for. Since sheep by their very nature are very social, an isolated sheep can quickly become bewildered and even neurotic, and become easy prey for wolves and lions. The shepherd's grief and anxiety is turned to joy when he finds the lost sheep and restores it to the fold.

The housewife who lost a coin faced something of an economic disaster, since the value of the coin would be equivalent to her husband's daily wage. What would she say to her husband when he returned home from work? They were poor and would suffer greatly because of the loss. Her grief and anxiety turn to joy when she finds the coin that she had misplaced.

Restoring the lost to the community of faith Both the shepherd and the housewife "search until what they have lost is found." Their perseverance pays off. They both instinctively share their joy with the whole community. The poor are particularly good at sharing in one anothers' sorrows and joys. What was new in Jesus' teaching was the insistence that lost sinners must be sought out and not merely mourned for their separation from God and the community of the just. God does not rejoice in the loss of anyone, but desires that all be saved and restored to fellowship with him. That is why the whole community of heaven rejoices when one sinner is found and restored to fellowship with God. Seekers of the lost are much needed today. Do you persistently pray and seek after those you know who have lost their way to God?

A broken family and grieving father Jesus told another parable about a Father who loses his son. This parable is a story in three parts. The first part of the story focuses on the restless behavior of the younger son who wants to leave home to get away from his father. He offends his father by demanding that his share of the father's inheritance be handed over to him right away, rather than waiting for the time appointed for passing on the inheritance after the the father has either passed away or has retired from the management of the family estate.

The second part of the story focuses on the extravagant and magnanimous character of the father who loves his younger son very dearly and generously gives his undeserving son whatever he asks for. He yields to his son's ill-timed request for his share of the family's wealth. The father must have grieved over his son's decision to leave him and go off to spend his share of the inheritance while he is still young and ill-prepared to manage such a large sum of money without acting foolishly and getting into serious trouble. Instead of resenting his younger son's disrespectful behavior and rejection, he maintains unbroken love for his son while he longs and searches for any sign of his return.

The third part of the story focuses on the older son who resents his younger brother for running off with his portion of the inheritance and he also resents his father's outrageous generosity and mercy towards the younger son.

The lost son "came to his senses" Why did the younger son decide to return to his father's home? Jesus said "he came to his senses" when disaster followed his reversal of fortune and loose living (Luke 15:17). He had lost all of his inheritance on wasted spending, and was barely surviving on what would have been a most shameful job for Jews - feeding swine which Jewish law regarded as unclean and unfit for eating. And to make matters worse, the younger son was now on the point of starving to death since famine had struck the land. He was desperate to stay alive and avoid a painful slow death. His only hope was that his father might take pity on him and let him return home, no longer as a worthy son, but as a hired servant instead.

The foolish son who had shamefully disinherited his father, knew he no longer deserved to be treated like a son. But he also knew that his father was merciful and kind. The son who was now a poor beggar wanted to return home to beg his father's forgiveness. Before the son could reach home, the father who had been searching daily for him, ran to meet him as soon as he recognized his presence on the road leading to his home. And then the father does the unthinkable - he treats his rebellious son, not with cold reserve, hot anger, or just condemnation, but with warm tender affection and tears of joy - and then restores him beyond his wildest dreams.

The father's extravagant love and mercy What is the main point or focus of the parable of the lost (prodigal) son? Is it the contrast between an obedient and a disobedient son? Or is it a contrast between the warm reception given by a generous and forgiving father or the cold and aloof reception given by the eldest son who wanted to have nothing to do with his rebellious brother? Jesus contrasts the father's merciful love with the eldest son's harsh rejection of his errant brother and his refusal to join his father in welcoming his brother back home.

While the errant son had wasted his father's money, his father, nonetheless, maintained unbroken love for his son. The son, while he was away, learned a lot about himself. And he realized that his father had given him love which he had not returned. He had yet to learn about the depth of his father's love for him. His deep humiliation at finding himself obliged to feed on the husks of pigs and his reflection on all he had lost, led to his repentance and decision to declare himself guilty before his father. While he hoped for reconciliation with his father, he could not have imagined a full restoration of relationship. The father did not need to speak words of forgiveness to his son - his actions spoke more loudly and clearly! The beautiful robe, the ring, and the festive banquet symbolize the new life - pure, worthy, and joyful - of each and every person who returns to the merciful embrace of the waiting Father in heaven.

The prodigal could not return to the garden of innocence, but he was welcomed and reinstated as a beloved son. The errant son's dramatic change from grief and guilt to forgiveness and restoration express in picture-language the resurrection from the dead and a rebirth to new abundant life with God the Father through his beloved Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.

Contempt and pride lead to division - mercy and forgiveness restores and unites The parable of the prodigal son also contrasts mercy and forgiveness with their opposites - an unwillingness to forgive and to be reconciled. The father who had been wronged, was forgiving and merciful towards the younger son who recognized his need for forgiveness. But the eldest son, who had not been wronged, was unforgiving and refused to be reconciled with his brother. His refusal to forgive turns into contempt and pride. And his resentment leads to his isolation and estrangement from the community of forgiven sinners.

In this parable Jesus gives us a vivid picture of God the Father and what his character and attitude towards us is like. God is truly generous, kind, and forgiving towards us. He does not lose hope or give up when we stray from him and his commandments. He searches our hearts to show us where true love and mercy can be found and he lead us back to the way of everlasting joy and happiness (Psalm 139:1, 23-24). God the Father always rejoices in searching out those who have strayed and he welcomes them home with open arms. Do you know the joy of your heavenly Father who welcomes you home to his kingdom of everlasting righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit?

Sources:

Lectionary for Mass for Use in the Dioceses of the United States, second typical edition, Copyright © 2001, 1998, 1997, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine; Psalm refrain © 1968, 1981, 1997, International Committee on English in the Liturgy, Inc. All rights reserved. Neither this work nor any part of it may be reproduced, distributed, performed or displayed in any medium, including electronic or digital, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

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amitsinhavidhi · 5 years

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Euthanasia and all that we should know

EUTHANASIA and all that we should know. The meaning of euthanasia is the painless killing of a patient who is suffering from an incurable and afflictive disease or is in an irreversible coma. In one word the meaning of this word is ‘mercy killing’ or ‘assisted suicide’.

SUPREME COURT JUDGEMENTS

The Apex Court in 2011 had recognised passive euthanasia in the Aruna Ramchandra Shanbaug Vs Union of India & Ors (on 7march, 2011) case by which it had permitted withdrawal of life-sustaining treatment from patients not in a position to make an informed decision. The bench was hearing a PIL filed by NGO COMMON CAUSE, saying safeguards were needed while taking a decision by medical boards to withdraw life support of a terminally-ill patient.

The Supreme Court of India recognised a “living will” (meaning, a written statement detailing a person's desires regarding future medical treatment in circumstances in which they are no longer able to express informed consent, especially an advance directive.) made by terminally-ill patients (meaning, persons who are suffering from an incurable disease that cannot be adequately treated and is reasonably expected to result in the death of the patient eventually.) for Passive Euthanasia. A five-judge Constitution bench headed by the Chief Justice of India (CJI) Dipak Mishra stated that passive euthanasia and advance living will are “permissible”.

The bench, also comprising justices A. K. Sikri, A. M. Khanwilkar, D. Y. Chandrachud and Ashok Bhushan, also laid down guidelines as to who would execute the will and how the nod for passive euthanasia would be granted by the Medical Board. The Apex Court said advance directives for terminally-ill patients could be issued and executed by the next friend and relatives of such person after which a medical board would consider it.

The Apex Court stated that the directions and guidelines laid down by it and its directive shall remain in force till a legislation is brought on the issue. The CJI, while reading out the judgement, said though there were four separate opinions of the bench, all the judges were unanimous that the “living will” should be permitted since a person cannot be allowed to continue suffering in a comatose state when he or she doesn’t wish to live.

On January 15, 2016, the Centre had said that the 241st report of the Law Commission stated that passive euthanasia should be allowed with certain safeguards and there was also a proposed Law-Medical Treatment of Terminally Ill Patient (Protection of Patients and Medical Practitioners) Bill 2006.

On March 9, 2018, Friday, in the case of Aruna Ramchandra Shanbaug Vs Union of India & Ors (on 7march, 2011), the Apex Court has allowed a living will and passive euthanasia. It has held the right to die with dignity is an inextricable facet of Article 21 of the Constitution. It further said that an adult human having mental capacity to take an informed decision has the right to refuse medical treatment including withdrawal from life-saving therapy.

The latest developments on the issue of Euthanasia:

Passive euthanasia is when medical treatment is withdrawn with the deliberate intention to hasten the death of a terminally ill patient.

The “living will” authorises patients to give explicit instructions in advance about the medical treatment to be administered when they are terminally ill or no longer able to express informed consent.

A person suffering from terminal illness has the right to refuse medical treatment to avoid “protracted physical suffering”, said the judgement peppered with quotes of writers and philosophers.

Passive euthanasia will apply only to a terminally ill person with no hope of recovery, the judges said that the issued guidelines would be in place until a law is enacted.

To consent a living will, a family member or a friend can go to the High Court, which will ask a Medical Board to decide if Passive euthanasia is needed.

The Chief Justice of India, while reading out the judgement, said that though there were four separate opinions of the bench, all the judges were unanimous that the “living will” should be permitted since a person cannot be allowed to continue suffering in a comatose state when he or she does not wish to live.

A national debate over the legalisation of euthanasia revolved around Aruna Shanbaug, a nurse who spent 42 years in vegetative state after a brutal rape in 1973 and died in 2015.

Though the Supreme Court in 2011 rejected a petition to stop the force-feeding of Aruna Shanbaug, it allowed “passive euthanasia” for the first time and said that life support could be legally removed for some terminally ill patients.

“This is an historic decision which clears the air,” said by Supreme Court lawyer Prashant Bhushan. “Everybody will breathe a sigh of relief, because people were earlier apprehensive that if they withdrew life support, they could be prosecuted for culpable homicide,” he added.

Active Euthanasia, by administering a lethal injection, remains illegal in India.

A critique of this change regarding Euthanasia

The recent legalisation of Passive Euthanasia has become the most discussed topic in the country. From a critique’s view I can find some Pros and Cons about Passive Euthanasia.

They are stated below:

PROs

Passive Euthanasia gives the right to a terminally-ill adult to make an informed decision whether that person wants to be diagnosed or terminate the treatment and die without any more suffering.

It provides a way to relieve extreme pain and also it is a way of relieve for a person whose quality of life is low.

It is another case of freedom of choice and also it frees up medical funds to help other people.

CONs

The history of the law’s treatment of assisted suicide in this country has been and continues to be one of the rejection of nearly all efforts to permit it. That being the case, our decisions lead us to conclude that the asserted ‘right’ to assistance in committing suicide is not a fundamental liberty interest protected by Due Process Clause.

Doctors must not engage in assisting suicide. They are inheritors of valuable tradition that inspires public trust. Nothing that is remotely beneficial to some particular patient in extremist is worth that damage that will be created by the perception that physicians sometimes aid and even abet people in taking their own lives. The greatest harm that a doctor can do is to consign a desperate patient to unbearable suffering or force the patient to seek out of such suffering permitting a physician assisted suicide would lead patients to distrust their doctors.

If we are to remain consistence and we believe that individual has the right to dispose of their life, we should not erect artificial barriers. This would mean so called “Peaceful Pill” should be available in the supermarket so that those old enough to understand death could obtain death peacefully at the time of their choosing.

#legal advice #lawyers in india #free legal advice #Indian lawyer #business lawyer #Top Human Rights Lawyers

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dmmowers · 7 years

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Respect to whom respect is due

Respect to whom respect is due A sermon for Trinity Episcopal Church, Baraboo, Wis. 14th Sunday after Pentecost | Year A, Track 2 | September 10, 2017 Ezekiel 33:7-11 | Psalm 119:33-40 | Romans 13:1-14** | Matthew 18:15-20 **reading lengthened due to sequential preaching of Romans this summer

The line of homeless people parted for a Dallas police cruiser to come through.

Then came another one. And another one. The homeless people came to this park several days a week because they knew that Don Hart and his team of volunteers would be there. The menu was scrambled eggs; volunteers stood by ready to pray with anyone who asked about it. But the dozen police cars that eventually showed up that particular morning made the homeless nervous. Was this some kind of sting? A roundup of homeless in the wrong place at the wrong time?

But then the police started questioning volunteers, and then came the order over the bullhorn: "This operation is feeding the homeless without a permit. Break these tables down now."

Don Hart was the director of Bigheart Ministries in Dallas, and had fed, clothed and counseled those in the homeless community in Dallas for 30 years. Now you're telling him he needs a permit? Like a lot of major cities across the country, in 2005 the Dallas City Council passed an ordinance that said that any organization who wanted to feed the homeless needed the city's approval, needed to provide bathrooms and to meet a list of public safety requirements. Dallas and other cities said that this was a matter of public health, to prevent homeless people from getting foodborne illnesses from improperly prepared food. Hart shot back that the city wanted to sweep the homeless under the rug and prevent the homeless from gathering together. When he filed a lawsuit in it was a violation of his religious freedom: Jesus shared meals with homeless people, he argued. And you can bet that he didn't have a certified food safety manager amongst his disciples.

Hart sued in federal court, and after 7 years, in 2013, the courts ruled in Hart's favor: feeding the homeless was an exercise of Hart's religious liberty. Hart began feeding the homeless again Easter Sunday 2013.

I could have chosen a number of stories like this to open this sermon this morning. There are similar stories about feeding the homeless in many major cities in this country. There was an infamous anti-illegal immigrant bill in Alabama a few years ago, since struck down by the US Supreme Court, that made it illegal for any church to feed, teach or give a ride to anyone who turned out to be an illegal immigrant. The reality is that even though the United States was the first country to guarantee free exercise of religion, the relationship between politics and the Christian faith has never been particularly clearcut.

This is not new. In his letter to the Romans, St. Paul helps the little church at Rome think through their relationship with the Roman Empire in our reading today. "Let every person be subject to the governing authorities; for there is no authority except from God, and those authorities that exist have been instituted by God. Therefore, whoever resists authority resists what God has appointed, and those who will resist will incur judgment."

If you're anything like me, and you were waiting for what Paul thought about politics, and you read that, you might find yourself underwhelmed. So you're just supposed to do what the authorities tell you? Even if they tell you that you can't feed the homeless? Even if they tell you that you can't do things that are inherent to what it means to be a Christian?

For quite a long time, as Christians interpreted this passage, that's essentially the line they took. Christians were to be good citizens, pay their taxes and not cause problems for the secular authorities, because the secular authorities have been instituted by God. This interpretation is enough of a headscratcher when you think about American democracy. But the church in Rome lived in the backyard of the Roman Emperor. After the rise of Caesar Augustus, the second Roman emperor, around the time of the birth of Christ, a popular story began to circulate throughout the Roman Empire: people started calling Caesar Augustus divi filius -- a Latin phrase meaning "divine son" or "Son of God". The writers Horace and Virgil wrote celebrated histories of Rome that culminated with the rise of Caesar Augustus and the era of justice and peace that Augustus brought with him to the entire Roman Empire. The Roman emperors that came after Augustus encouraged this behavior, building prominent houses of worship so that the people could come and offer worship to the emperor, as though he was a God.

Does Paul really mean that we are to be subject to the governing authorities even if they are demanding worship we give to God alone? Even if they are telling us that we can't feed homeless people? Is there more to the story here

II.

As you might guess, there is more to the story, and we'll come back to how Paul meant the Romans to interact with the government in a moment. But I think we probably know people who treat our American government this way - as though our primary duty in life is to be a good citizen of the United States, and to live without running afoul of the law. Many of us treat the United States as though our identity as Americans is the most important thing about ourselves. Lots of us wince when we have to deal directly with government red tape or with state or county entities who seem more interested in collecting a paycheck than they do in helping the people they're supposed to serve. But all of that seems far removed when we talk about freedom, when we celebrate national holidays, and when we reflect on what our country is like.

Around the Fourth of July in 2016, Lifeway Research Group published a poll of 1000 Protestant pastors, asking them a number of questions about the relationship between their congregations and patriotism. One of the questions they asked was, "Do you ever worry that your congregations love America more than they love God?" 53% of pastors said that they did. I have been and continue to be a part of that 53%.

The God who raised Jesus Christ from the dead is a God who displaces all other allegiances, who insists that our love for country must take a backseat to our love for and allegiance to the Lord Jesus and to the family that he calls to follow him, the family called church. This is obviously dicey territory. Lots of us in this room are veterans, and many of us have people we know who serve in the military currently. Sometimes when you start talking about allegiances, people think that you're being disrespectful to veterans or servicemembers, and I want to be sure that you all know that that's not my intent at all. We ask an enormous amount of our veterans and active duty personnel, and when they return from combat, our culture puts a cone of silence around them, limiting the places where they can share and process the terrible things that they experienced. I am tremendously grateful for the sacrifice that each of you veterans and military families have made.

And so it's with all the respect in the world for military families that I point out that if we believe in the gospel of St. Paul, our primary allegiance must shift. The God who raised Jesus Christ from the dead is a God who will not have his people serve any other gods before him. When people ask us who we are, the most important marker is not American. It's not Democrat or Republican, or progressive or conservative. It's Christian.

III.

That puts us in a delicate situation, of course. We are left in the tension of knowing that we are followers of the Lord Jesus and called to live a life that points to Jesus. Our primary allegiance has changed. We place the Lord Jesus and his church ahead of a flag, ahead of unbridled greed, ahead of our individual reputation in a community. And we still interact with the government and in some cases serve in the government - but we do so as Christians. The governing authorities are not always friends of God's people. Christians in many eras have come under suspicion by governments because governments have feared that Christians were up to subversive activities. From Rome itself in the mid 60s, just after Paul wrote this letter, up to the present day in some cases, certain governments have seen Christians as a threat. The Anglican Archbishop of Uganda, Janani Luwum, was personally executed in 1977 by the dictator Idi Amin. In 1980, Catholic Archbishop Oscar Romero was shot and killed while celebrating Mass by a sniper connected to the military of El Salvador, where he lived and served. Even in America, the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr., while not undertaken by the government, was motivated by his activities with the Civil Rights Movement - political activities which were directly inspired and motivated by his Christian faith.

Why does this thread of Christians being subversive to governments run through church history? Because of things like what Paul writes to the Romans here. He says, "There is no authority except from God, and those authorities exist that have been instituted by God." He's writing to a tiny, rag-tag church in the capital of an empire that spans the entire known world, an empire whose emperor is worshiped as a god himself, an emperor who claims all the authority there is on Earth. But Paul directly contradicts this claim: Caesar is not Lord of the universe because Jesus is Lord of the universe. Any emperor who would set himself up as the final authority on earth is confronted by the fact that that Jesus, who came to Earth as Messiah, has now been crowned King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Emperor of Emperors, President of Presidents, and he reigns as king over the world. That's present tense - he reigns now as king, no matter what Caesar tells us about his own authority.

From the very beginning of the story of the Bible, our God has been a God who has wanted to share the task of governing the world with people. That's what Paul means when he says that all governing authorities are established by God - God graciously shares the task of governing with flawed people, and it is right for Christians to obey and support those people as far as it is possible. We pay to all what is due them, Paul writes - taxes to whom taxes are due, revenue to whom revenue is due, respect to whom respect is due, honor to whom honor is due. But when the culture around that little church in Rome was demanding that they go and pay homage to the emperor in temples built for that worship, you can bet that Paul's word to his little church was: no. Stop. We worship God alone. Caesar is not Lord because Jesus is Lord.

IV.

I preached a sermon a couple years ago where I touched on some political themes at a previous parish. When I arrived at the office for the first time after that sermon, I had a lengthy e-mail with the subject line: Stop Mixing Politics and the Gospel. That subject line has stuck with me ever since. There is an impulse that is deeply ingrained in American society that says that religion is one thing and politics are another, and so we can believe whatever we want to believe about God without having to critically examine our politics. Christians believe that each human person is created in the image of God, that each of us bear the imprint of God's loving creation. Lots of Democrats deny that this image of God exists for unborn children and so call abortion a right, rather than a violent denial of the image of God in an unborn child. Lots of Republicans are happy to say that convicted violent criminals are made in the image of God, but see no contradiction between this belief and the use of the death penalty, a process which violently denies the image of God in the person of that criminal.

It took me a minute, but I came to really appreciate the person who e-mailed me. She had a problem with a few things I said, and so she came to me directly to talk about it. She was respectful and kind to me personally while making it clear she disagreed with me about some things. She met with me later and we had a productive follow-up conversation. We never got to where we agreed about the issue, but I better understood where she was coming from, and she could better see how the gospel made demands of us politically that she couldn't see before.

This was a good example of the process of solving interpersonal conflict that Matthew lays out in the gospel reading we read this morning. When we have a conflict, we don't call our friends and tell them about what a terrible person so and so is. We go to the person directly, privately, and preferably in person to say that they have hurt us, or that we disagree about something, or that we wonder about something they said. We presume that they have the best of intentions, and we do our best to be honest with them. We might not get to where we agree, but hopefully we can settle the conflict and leave wishing the best for each other. If we can't, then we have another conversation where we bring along one other person and try to show the person where they've gone wrong. We confront hard things directly, we don't feed the rumor mill, we don't assume the worst of the other person.

There's been a lot in this sermon today that you might read as more controversial than my usual preaching. I'll be the first to tell you that's because what Paul wrote is controversial; it's a difficult text. But if you find yourself struggling with the idea that following Jesus changes our relationship with our government or our country, let's talk. Let's confront whatever feels uncomfortable or wrong about that in private but directly so that we can go forward together. Maybe we'll come to agree, maybe we won't, but I'm committed to being here and to being your pastor, even if I've said things that you find offensive. That is the way that Christians resolve conflict, and that is the way forward for us in difficult political times: we talk together to discern how to be good citizens, how to pray for our leaders and servicemembers, but also to remind ourselves and everyone that all human leaders face the judgment of God. When leaders misbehave, or when they forget their God-given vocation to provide for the poor and for people who are vulnerable, Christians are there to remind them that there is God who rules heaven and earth and who one day will come to bring justice to all those who are wronged by the abuse of any authority. The day when that judgment will come is closer than we think: "besides this, you know what time it is, how it is now the moment for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we became believers; the night is far gone, the day is near." When that day comes, the righteous Messiah on his throne will be revealed, and all emperors, presidents and generals will bow and say, "Worthy is the Lamb to receive blessing and honor and glory and power." Thanks be to God.

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Mean while the heinous and despiteful act Of Satan, done in Paradise; and how He, in the serpent, had perverted Eve, Her husband she, to taste the fatal fruit, Was known in Heaven; for what can 'scape the eye Of God all-seeing, or deceive his heart Omniscient? who, in all things wise and just, Hindered not Satan to attempt the mind Of Man, with strength entire and free will armed, Complete to have discovered and repulsed Whatever wiles of foe or seeming friend. For still they knew, and ought to have still remembered, The high injunction, not to taste that fruit, Whoever tempted; which they not obeying, (Incurred what could they less?) the penalty; And, manifold in sin, deserved to fall. Up into Heaven from Paradise in haste The angelick guards ascended, mute, and sad, For Man; for of his state by this they knew, Much wondering how the subtle Fiend had stolen Entrance unseen. Soon as the unwelcome news From Earth arrived at Heaven-gate, displeased All were who heard; dim sadness did not spare That time celestial visages, yet, mixed With pity, violated not their bliss. About the new-arrived, in multitudes The ethereal people ran, to hear and know How all befel: They towards the throne supreme, Accountable, made haste, to make appear, With righteous plea, their utmost vigilance And easily approved; when the Most High Eternal Father, from his secret cloud, Amidst in thunder uttered thus his voice. Assembled Angels, and ye Powers returned From unsuccessful charge; be not dismayed, Nor troubled at these tidings from the earth, Which your sincerest care could not prevent; Foretold so lately what would come to pass, When first this tempter crossed the gulf from Hell. I told ye then he should prevail, and speed On his bad errand; Man should be seduced, And flattered out of all, believing lies Against his Maker; no decree of mine Concurring to necessitate his fall, Or touch with lightest moment of impulse His free will, to her own inclining left In even scale. But fallen he is; and now What rests, but that the mortal sentence pass On his transgression,--death denounced that day? Which he presumes already vain and void, Because not yet inflicted, as he feared, By some immediate stroke; but soon shall find Forbearance no acquittance, ere day end. Justice shall not return as bounty scorned. But whom send I to judge them? whom but thee, Vicegerent Son? To thee I have transferred All judgement, whether in Heaven, or Earth, or Hell. Easy it may be seen that I intend Mercy colleague with justice, sending thee Man's friend, his Mediator, his designed Both ransom and Redeemer voluntary, And destined Man himself to judge Man fallen. So spake the Father; and, unfolding bright Toward the right hand his glory, on the Son Blazed forth unclouded Deity: He full Resplendent all his Father manifest Expressed, and thus divinely answered mild. Father Eternal, thine is to decree; Mine, both in Heaven and Earth, to do thy will Supreme; that thou in me, thy Son beloved, Mayest ever rest well pleased. I go to judge On earth these thy transgressours; but thou knowest, Whoever judged, the worst on me must light, When time shall be; for so I undertook Before thee; and, not repenting, this obtain Of right, that I may mitigate their doom On me derived; yet I shall temper so Justice with mercy, as may illustrate most Them fully satisfied, and thee appease. Attendance none shall need, nor train, where none Are to behold the judgement, but the judged, Those two; the third best absent is condemned, Convict by flight, and rebel to all law: Conviction to the serpent none belongs. Thus saying, from his radiant seat he rose Of high collateral glory: Him Thrones, and Powers, Princedoms, and Dominations ministrant, Accompanied to Heaven-gate; from whence Eden, and all the coast, in prospect lay. Down he descended straight; the speed of Gods Time counts not, though with swiftest minutes winged. Now was the sun in western cadence low From noon, and gentle airs, due at their hour, To fan the earth now waked, and usher in The evening cool; when he, from wrath more cool, Came the mild Judge, and Intercessour both, To sentence Man: The voice of God they heard Now walking in the garden, by soft winds Brought to their ears, while day declined; they heard, And from his presence hid themselves among The thickest trees, both man and wife; till God, Approaching, thus to Adam called aloud. Where art thou, Adam, wont with joy to meet My coming seen far off? I miss thee here, Not pleased, thus entertained with solitude, Where obvious duty ere while appeared unsought: Or come I less conspicuous, or what change Absents thee, or what chance detains?--Come forth! He came; and with him Eve, more loth, though first To offend; discountenanced both, and discomposed; Love was not in their looks, either to God, Or to each other; but apparent guilt, And shame, and perturbation, and despair, Anger, and obstinacy, and hate, and guile. Whence Adam, faltering long, thus answered brief. I heard thee in the garden, and of thy voice Afraid, being naked, hid myself. To whom The gracious Judge without revile replied. My voice thou oft hast heard, and hast not feared, But still rejoiced; how is it now become So dreadful to thee? That thou art naked, who Hath told thee? Hast thou eaten of the tree, Whereof I gave thee charge thou shouldst not eat? To whom thus Adam sore beset replied. O Heaven! in evil strait this day I stand Before my Judge; either to undergo Myself the total crime, or to accuse My other self, the partner of my life; Whose failing, while her faith to me remains, I should conceal, and not expose to blame By my complaint: but strict necessity Subdues me, and calamitous constraint; Lest on my head both sin and punishment, However insupportable, be all Devolved; though should I hold my peace, yet thou Wouldst easily detect what I conceal.-- This Woman, whom thou madest to be my help, And gavest me as thy perfect gift, so good, So fit, so acceptable, so divine, That from her hand I could suspect no ill, And what she did, whatever in itself, Her doing seemed to justify the deed; She gave me of the tree, and I did eat. To whom the Sovran Presence thus replied. Was she thy God, that her thou didst obey Before his voice? or was she made thy guide, Superiour, or but equal, that to her Thou didst resign thy manhood, and the place Wherein God set thee above her made of thee, And for thee, whose perfection far excelled Hers in all real dignity? Adorned She was indeed, and lovely, to attract Thy love, not thy subjection; and her gifts Were such, as under government well seemed; Unseemly to bear rule; which was thy part And person, hadst thou known thyself aright. So having said, he thus to Eve in few. Say, Woman, what is this which thou hast done? To whom sad Eve, with shame nigh overwhelmed, Confessing soon, yet not before her Judge Bold or loquacious, thus abashed replied. The Serpent me beguiled, and I did eat. Which when the Lord God heard, without delay To judgement he proceeded on the accused Serpent, though brute; unable to transfer The guilt on him, who made him instrument Of mischief, and polluted from the end Of his creation; justly then accursed, As vitiated in nature: More to know Concerned not Man, (since he no further knew) Nor altered his offence; yet God at last To Satan first in sin his doom applied, Though in mysterious terms, judged as then best: And on the Serpent thus his curse let fall. Because thou hast done this, thou art accursed Above all cattle, each beast of the field; Upon thy belly groveling thou shalt go, And dust shalt eat all the days of thy life. Between thee and the woman I will put Enmity, and between thine and her seed; Her seed shall bruise thy head, thou bruise his heel. So spake this oracle, then verified When Jesus, Son of Mary, second Eve, Saw Satan fall, like lightning, down from Heaven, Prince of the air; then, rising from his grave Spoiled Principalities and Powers, triumphed In open show; and, with ascension bright, Captivity led captive through the air, The realm itself of Satan, long usurped; Whom he shall tread at last under our feet; Even he, who now foretold his fatal bruise; And to the Woman thus his sentence turned. Thy sorrow I will greatly multiply By thy conception; children thou shalt bring In sorrow forth; and to thy husband's will Thine shall submit; he over thee shall rule. On Adam last thus judgement he pronounced. Because thou hast hearkened to the voice of thy wife, And eaten of the tree, concerning which I charged thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat thereof: Cursed is the ground for thy sake; thou in sorrow Shalt eat thereof, all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles it shall bring thee forth Unbid; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, Till thou return unto the ground; for thou Out of the ground wast taken, know thy birth, For dust thou art, and shalt to dust return. So judged he Man, both Judge and Saviour sent; And the instant stroke of death, denounced that day, Removed far off; then, pitying how they stood Before him naked to the air, that now Must suffer change, disdained not to begin Thenceforth the form of servant to assume; As when he washed his servants feet; so now, As father of his family, he clad Their nakedness with skins of beasts, or slain, Or as the snake with youthful coat repaid; And thought not much to clothe his enemies; Nor he their outward only with the skins Of beasts, but inward nakedness, much more. Opprobrious, with his robe of righteousness, Arraying, covered from his Father's sight. To him with swift ascent he up returned, Into his blissful bosom reassumed In glory, as of old; to him appeased All, though all-knowing, what had passed with Man Recounted, mixing intercession sweet. Mean while, ere thus was sinned and judged on Earth, Within the gates of Hell sat Sin and Death, In counterview within the gates, that now Stood open wide, belching outrageous flame Far into Chaos, since the Fiend passed through, Sin opening; who thus now to Death began. O Son, why sit we here each other viewing Idly, while Satan, our great author, thrives In other worlds, and happier seat provides For us, his offspring dear? It cannot be But that success attends him; if mishap, Ere this he had returned, with fury driven By his avengers; since no place like this Can fit his punishment, or their revenge. Methinks I feel new strength within me rise, Wings growing, and dominion given me large Beyond this deep; whatever draws me on, Or sympathy, or some connatural force, Powerful at greatest distance to unite, With secret amity, things of like kind, By secretest conveyance. Thou, my shade Inseparable, must with me along; For Death from Sin no power can separate. But, lest the difficulty of passing back Stay his return perhaps over this gulf Impassable, impervious; let us try Adventurous work, yet to thy power and mine Not unagreeable, to found a path Over this main from Hell to that new world, Where Satan now prevails; a monument Of merit high to all the infernal host, Easing their passage hence, for intercourse, Or transmigration, as their lot shall lead. Nor can I miss the way, so strongly drawn By this new-felt attraction and instinct. Whom thus the meager Shadow answered soon. Go, whither Fate, and inclination strong, Leads thee; I shall not lag behind, nor err The way, thou leading; such a scent I draw Of carnage, prey innumerable, and taste The savour of death from all things there that live: Nor shall I to the work thou enterprisest Be wanting, but afford thee equal aid. So saying, with delight he snuffed the smell Of mortal change on earth. As when a flock Of ravenous fowl, though many a league remote, Against the day of battle, to a field, Where armies lie encamped, come flying, lured With scent of living carcasses designed For death, the following day, in bloody fight: So scented the grim Feature, and upturned His nostril wide into the murky air; Sagacious of his quarry from so far. Then both from out Hell-gates, into the waste Wide anarchy of Chaos, damp and dark, Flew diverse; and with power (their power was great) Hovering upon the waters, what they met Solid or slimy, as in raging sea Tost up and down, together crouded drove, From each side shoaling towards the mouth of Hell; As when two polar winds, blowing adverse Upon the Cronian sea, together drive Mountains of ice, that stop the imagined way Beyond Petsora eastward, to the rich Cathaian coast. The aggregated soil Death with his mace petrifick, cold and dry, As with a trident, smote; and fixed as firm As Delos, floating once; the rest his look Bound with Gorgonian rigour not to move; And with Asphaltick slime, broad as the gate, Deep to the roots of Hell the gathered beach They fastened, and the mole immense wrought on Over the foaming deep high-arched, a bridge Of length prodigious, joining to the wall Immoveable of this now fenceless world, Forfeit to Death; from hence a passage broad, Smooth, easy, inoffensive, down to Hell. So, if great things to small may be compared, Xerxes, the liberty of Greece to yoke, From Susa, his Memnonian palace high, Came to the sea: and, over Hellespont Bridging his way, Europe with Asia joined, And scourged with many a stroke the indignant waves. Now had they brought the work by wonderous art Pontifical, a ridge of pendant rock, Over the vexed abyss, following the track Of Satan to the self-same place where he First lighted from his wing, and landed safe From out of Chaos, to the outside bare Of this round world: With pins of adamant And chains they made all fast, too fast they made And durable! And now in little space The confines met of empyrean Heaven, And of this World; and, on the left hand, Hell With long reach interposed; three several ways In sight, to each of these three places led. And now their way to Earth they had descried, To Paradise first tending; when, behold! Satan, in likeness of an Angel bright, Betwixt the Centaur and the Scorpion steering His zenith, while the sun in Aries rose: Disguised he came; but those his children dear Their parent soon discerned, though in disguise. He, after Eve seduced, unminded slunk Into the wood fast by; and, changing shape, To observe the sequel, saw his guileful act By Eve, though all unweeting, seconded Upon her husband; saw their shame that sought Vain covertures; but when he saw descend The Son of God to judge them, terrified He fled; not hoping to escape, but shun The present; fearing, guilty, what his wrath Might suddenly inflict; that past, returned By night, and listening where the hapless pair Sat in their sad discourse, and various plaint, Thence gathered his own doom; which understood Not instant, but of future time, with joy And tidings fraught, to Hell he now returned; And at the brink of Chaos, near the foot Of this new wonderous pontifice, unhoped Met, who to meet him came, his offspring dear. Great joy was at their meeting, and at sight Of that stupendious bridge his joy encreased. Long he admiring stood, till Sin, his fair Enchanting daughter, thus the silence broke. O Parent, these are thy magnifick deeds, Thy trophies! which thou viewest as not thine own; Thou art their author, and prime architect: For I no sooner in my heart divined, My heart, which by a secret harmony Still moves with thine, joined in connexion sweet, That thou on earth hadst prospered, which thy looks Now also evidence, but straight I felt, Though distant from thee worlds between, yet felt, That I must after thee, with this thy son; Such fatal consequence unites us three! Hell could no longer hold us in our bounds, Nor this unvoyageable gulf obscure Detain from following thy illustrious track. Thou hast achieved our liberty, confined Within Hell-gates till now; thou us impowered To fortify thus far, and overlay, With this portentous bridge, the dark abyss. Thine now is all this world; thy virtue hath won What thy hands builded not; thy wisdom gained With odds what war hath lost, and fully avenged Our foil in Heaven; here thou shalt monarch reign, There didst not; there let him still victor sway, As battle hath adjudged; from this new world Retiring, by his own doom alienated; And henceforth monarchy with thee divide Of all things, parted by the empyreal bounds, His quadrature, from thy orbicular world; Or try thee now more dangerous to his throne. Whom thus the Prince of darkness answered glad. Fair Daughter, and thou Son and Grandchild both; High proof ye now have given to be the race Of Satan (for I glory in the name, Antagonist of Heaven's Almighty King,) Amply have merited of me, of all The infernal empire, that so near Heaven's door Triumphal with triumphal act have met, Mine, with this glorious work; and made one realm, Hell and this world, one realm, one continent Of easy thorough-fare. Therefore, while I Descend through darkness, on your road with ease, To my associate Powers, them to acquaint With these successes, and with them rejoice; You two this way, among these numerous orbs, All yours, right down to Paradise descend; There dwell, and reign in bliss; thence on the earth Dominion exercise and in the air, Chiefly on Man, sole lord of all declared; Him first make sure your thrall, and lastly kill. My substitutes I send ye, and create Plenipotent on earth, of matchless might Issuing from me: on your joint vigour now My hold of this new kingdom all depends, Through Sin to Death exposed by my exploit. If your joint power prevail, the affairs of Hell No detriment need fear; go, and be strong! So saying he dismissed them; they with speed Their course through thickest constellations held, Spreading their bane; the blasted stars looked wan, And planets, planet-struck, real eclipse Then suffered. The other way Satan went down The causey to Hell-gate: On either side Disparted Chaos overbuilt exclaimed, And with rebounding surge the bars assailed, That scorned his indignation: Through the gate, Wide open and unguarded, Satan passed, And all about found desolate; for those, Appointed to sit there, had left their charge, Flown to the upper world; the rest were all Far to the inland retired, about the walls Of Pandemonium; city and proud seat Of Lucifer, so by allusion called Of that bright star to Satan paragoned; There kept their watch the legions, while the Grand In council sat, solicitous what chance Might intercept their emperour sent; so he Departing gave command, and they observed. As when the Tartar from his Russian foe, By Astracan, over the snowy plains, Retires; or Bactrin Sophi, from the horns Of Turkish crescent, leaves all waste beyond The realm of Aladule, in his retreat To Tauris or Casbeen: So these, the late Heaven-banished host, left desart utmost Hell Many a dark league, reduced in careful watch Round their metropolis; and now expecting Each hour their great adventurer, from the search Of foreign worlds: He through the midst unmarked, In show plebeian Angel militant Of lowest order, passed; and from the door Of that Plutonian hall, invisible Ascended his high throne; which, under state Of richest texture spread, at the upper end Was placed in regal lustre. Down a while He sat, and round about him saw unseen: At last, as from a cloud, his fulgent head And shape star-bright appeared, or brighter; clad With what permissive glory since his fall Was left him, or false glitter: All amazed At that so sudden blaze the Stygian throng Bent their aspect, and whom they wished beheld, Their mighty Chief returned: loud was the acclaim: Forth rushed in haste the great consulting peers, Raised from their dark Divan, and with like joy Congratulant approached him; who with hand Silence, and with these words attention, won. Thrones, Dominations, Princedoms, Virtues, Powers; For in possession such, not only of right, I call ye, and declare ye now; returned Successful beyond hope, to lead ye forth Triumphant out of this infernal pit Abominable, accursed, the house of woe, And dungeon of our tyrant: Now possess, As Lords, a spacious world, to our native Heaven Little inferiour, by my adventure hard With peril great achieved. Long were to tell What I have done; what suffered;with what pain Voyaged th' unreal, vast, unbounded deep Of horrible confusion; over which By Sin and Death a broad way now is paved, To expedite your glorious march; but I Toiled out my uncouth passage, forced to ride The untractable abyss, plunged in the womb Of unoriginal Night and Chaos wild; That, jealous of their secrets, fiercely opposed My journey strange, with clamorous uproar Protesting Fate supreme; thence how I found The new created world, which fame in Heaven Long had foretold, a fabrick wonderful Of absolute perfection! therein Man Placed in a Paradise, by our exile Made happy: Him by fraud I have seduced From his Creator; and, the more to encrease Your wonder, with an apple; he, thereat Offended, worth your laughter! hath given up Both his beloved Man, and all his world, To Sin and Death a prey, and so to us, Without our hazard, labour, or alarm; To range in, and to dwell, and over Man To rule, as over all he should have ruled. True is, me also he hath judged, or rather Me not, but the brute serpent in whose shape Man I deceived: that which to me belongs, Is enmity which he will put between Me and mankind; I am to bruise his heel; His seed, when is not set, shall bruise my head: A world who would not purchase with a bruise, Or much more grievous pain?--Ye have the account Of my performance: What remains, ye Gods, But up, and enter now into full bliss? So having said, a while he stood, expecting Their universal shout, and high applause, To fill his ear; when, contrary, he hears On all sides, from innumerable tongues, A dismal universal hiss, the sound Of publick scorn; he wondered, but not long Had leisure, wondering at himself now more, His visage drawn he felt to sharp and spare; His arms clung to his ribs; his legs entwining Each other, till supplanted down he fell A monstrous serpent on his belly prone, Reluctant, but in vain; a greater power Now ruled him, punished in the shape he sinned, According to his doom: he would have spoke, But hiss for hiss returned with forked tongue To forked tongue; for now were all transformed Alike, to serpents all, as accessories To his bold riot: Dreadful was the din Of hissing through the hall, thick swarming now With complicated monsters head and tail, Scorpion, and Asp, and Amphisbaena dire, Cerastes horned, Hydrus, and Elops drear, And Dipsas; (not so thick swarmed once the soil Bedropt with blood of Gorgon, or the isle Ophiusa,) but still greatest he the midst, Now Dragon grown, larger than whom the sun Ingendered in the Pythian vale or slime, Huge Python, and his power no less he seemed Above the rest still to retain; they all Him followed, issuing forth to the open field, Where all yet left of that revolted rout, Heaven-fallen, in station stood or just array; Sublime with expectation when to see In triumph issuing forth their glorious Chief; They saw, but other sight instead! a croud Of ugly serpents; horrour on them fell, And horrid sympathy; for, what they saw, They felt themselves, now changing; down their arms, Down fell both spear and shield; down they as fast; And the dire hiss renewed, and the dire form Catched, by contagion; like in punishment, As in their crime. Thus was the applause they meant, Turned to exploding hiss, triumph to shame Cast on themselves from their own mouths. There stood A grove hard by, sprung up with this their change, His will who reigns above, to aggravate Their penance, laden with fair fruit, like that Which grew in Paradise, the bait of Eve Used by the Tempter: on that prospect strange Their earnest eyes they fixed, imagining For one forbidden tree a multitude Now risen, to work them further woe or shame; Yet, parched with scalding thirst and hunger fierce, Though to delude them sent, could not abstain; But on they rolled in heaps, and, up the trees Climbing, sat thicker than the snaky locks That curled Megaera: greedily they plucked The fruitage fair to sight, like that which grew Near that bituminous lake where Sodom flamed; This more delusive, not the touch, but taste Deceived; they, fondly thinking to allay Their appetite with gust, instead of fruit Chewed bitter ashes, which the offended taste With spattering noise rejected: oft they assayed, Hunger and thirst constraining; drugged as oft, With hatefullest disrelish writhed their jaws, With soot and cinders filled; so oft they fell Into the same illusion, not as Man Whom they triumphed once lapsed. Thus were they plagued And worn with famine, long and ceaseless hiss, Till their lost shape, permitted, they resumed; Yearly enjoined, some say, to undergo, This annual humbling certain numbered days, To dash their pride, and joy, for Man seduced. However, some tradition they dispersed Among the Heathen, of their purchase got, And fabled how the Serpent, whom they called Ophion, with Eurynome, the wide-- Encroaching Eve perhaps, had first the rule Of high Olympus; thence by Saturn driven And Ops, ere yet Dictaean Jove was born. Mean while in Paradise the hellish pair Too soon arrived; Sin, there in power before, Once actual; now in body, and to dwell Habitual habitant; behind her Death, Close following pace for pace, not mounted yet On his pale horse: to whom Sin thus began. Second of Satan sprung, all-conquering Death! What thinkest thou of our empire now, though earned With travel difficult, not better far Than still at Hell's dark threshold to have sat watch, Unnamed, undreaded, and thyself half starved? Whom thus the Sin-born monster answered soon. To me, who with eternal famine pine, Alike is Hell, or Paradise, or Heaven; There best, where most with ravine I may meet; Which here, though plenteous, all too little seems To stuff this maw, this vast unhide-bound corps. To whom the incestuous mother thus replied. Thou therefore on these herbs, and fruits, and flowers, Feed first; on each beast next, and fish, and fowl; No homely morsels! and, whatever thing The sithe of Time mows down, devour unspared; Till I, in Man residing, through the race, His thoughts, his looks, words, actions, all infect; And season him thy last and sweetest prey. This said, they both betook them several ways, Both to destroy, or unimmortal make All kinds, and for destruction to mature Sooner or later; which the Almighty seeing, From his transcendent seat the Saints among, To those bright Orders uttered thus his voice. See, with what heat these dogs of Hell advance To waste and havock yonder world, which I So fair and good created; and had still Kept in that state, had not the folly of Man Let in these wasteful furies, who impute Folly to me; so doth the Prince of Hell And his adherents, that with so much ease I suffer them to enter and possess A place so heavenly; and, conniving, seem To gratify my scornful enemies, That laugh, as if, transported with some fit Of passion, I to them had quitted all, At random yielded up to their misrule; And know not that I called, and drew them thither, My Hell-hounds, to lick up the draff and filth Which Man's polluting sin with taint hath shed On what was pure; til, crammed and gorged, nigh burst With sucked and glutted offal, at one sling Of thy victorious arm, well-pleasing Son, Both Sin, and Death, and yawning Grave, at last, Through Chaos hurled, obstruct the mouth of Hell For ever, and seal up his ravenous jaws. Then Heaven and Earth renewed shall be made pure To sanctity, that shall receive no stain: Till then, the curse pronounced on both precedes. He ended, and the heavenly audience loud Sung Halleluiah, as the sound of seas, Through multitude that sung: Just are thy ways, Righteous are thy decrees on all thy works; Who can extenuate thee? Next, to the Son, Destined Restorer of mankind, by whom New Heaven and Earth shall to the ages rise, Or down from Heaven descend.--Such was their song; While the Creator, calling forth by name His mighty Angels, gave them several charge, As sorted best with present things. The sun Had first his precept so to move, so shine, As might affect the earth with cold and heat Scarce tolerable; and from the north to call Decrepit winter; from the south to bring Solstitial summer's heat. To the blanc moon Her office they prescribed; to the other five Their planetary motions, and aspects, In sextile, square, and trine, and opposite, Of noxious efficacy, and when to join In synod unbenign; and taught the fixed Their influence malignant when to shower, Which of them rising with the sun, or falling, Should prove tempestuous: To the winds they set Their corners, when with bluster to confound Sea, air, and shore; the thunder when to roll With terrour through the dark aereal hall. Some say, he bid his Angels turn ascanse The poles of earth, twice ten degrees and more, From the sun's axle; they with labour pushed Oblique the centrick globe: Some say, the sun Was bid turn reins from the equinoctial road Like distant breadth to Taurus with the seven Atlantick Sisters, and the Spartan Twins, Up to the Tropick Crab: thence down amain By Leo, and the Virgin, and the Scales, As deep as Capricorn; to bring in change Of seasons to each clime; else had the spring Perpetual smiled on earth with vernant flowers, Equal in days and nights, except to those Beyond the polar circles; to them day Had unbenighted shone, while the low sun, To recompense his distance, in their sight Had rounded still the horizon, and not known Or east or west; which had forbid the snow From cold Estotiland, and south as far Beneath Magellan. At that tasted fruit The sun, as from Thyestean banquet, turned His course intended; else, how had the world Inhabited, though sinless, more than now, Avoided pinching cold and scorching heat? These changes in the Heavens, though slow, produced Like change on sea and land; sideral blast, Vapour, and mist, and exhalation hot, Corrupt and pestilent: Now from the north Of Norumbega, and the Samoed shore, Bursting their brazen dungeon, armed with ice, And snow, and hail, and stormy gust and flaw, Boreas, and Caecias, and Argestes loud, And Thrascias, rend the woods, and seas upturn; With adverse blast upturns them from the south Notus, and Afer black with thunderous clouds From Serraliona; thwart of these, as fierce, Forth rush the Levant and the Ponent winds, Eurus and Zephyr, with their lateral noise, Sirocco and Libecchio. Thus began Outrage from lifeless things; but Discord first, Daughter of Sin, among the irrational Death introduced, through fierce antipathy: Beast now with beast 'gan war, and fowl with fowl, And fish with fish; to graze the herb all leaving, Devoured each other; nor stood much in awe Of Man, but fled him; or, with countenance grim, Glared on him passing. These were from without The growing miseries, which Adam saw Already in part, though hid in gloomiest shade, To sorrow abandoned, but worse felt within; And, in a troubled sea of passion tost, Thus to disburden sought with sad complaint. O miserable of happy! Is this the end Of this new glorious world, and me so late The glory of that glory, who now become Accursed, of blessed? hide me from the face Of God, whom to behold was then my highth Of happiness!--Yet well, if here would end The misery; I deserved it, and would bear My own deservings; but this will not serve: All that I eat or drink, or shall beget, Is propagated curse. O voice, once heard Delightfully, Encrease and multiply; Now death to hear! for what can I encrease, Or multiply, but curses on my head? Who of all ages to succeed, but, feeling The evil on him brought by me, will curse My head? Ill fare our ancestor impure, For this we may thank Adam! but his thanks Shall be the execration: so, besides Mine own that bide upon me, all from me Shall with a fierce reflux on me rebound; On me, as on their natural center, light Heavy, though in their place. O fleeting joys Of Paradise, dear bought with lasting woes! Did I request thee, Maker, from my clay To mould me Man? did I solicit thee From darkness to promote me, or here place In this delicious garden? As my will Concurred not to my being, it were but right And equal to reduce me to my dust; Desirous to resign and render back All I received; unable to perform Thy terms too hard, by which I was to hold The good I sought not. To the loss of that, Sufficient penalty, why hast thou added The sense of endless woes? Inexplicable Why am I mocked with death, and lengthened out To deathless pain? How gladly would I meet Mortality my sentence, and be earth Insensible! How glad would lay me down As in my mother's lap! There I should rest, And sleep secure; his dreadful voice no more Would thunder in my ears; no fear of worse To me, and to my offspring, would torment me With cruel expectation. Yet one doubt Pursues me still, lest all I cannot die; Lest that pure breath of life, the spirit of Man Which God inspired, cannot together perish With this corporeal clod; then, in the grave, Or in some other dismal place, who knows But I shall die a living death? O thought Horrid, if true! Yet why? It was but breath Of life that sinned; what dies but what had life And sin? The body properly had neither, All of me then shall die: let this appease The doubt, since human reach no further knows. For though the Lord of all be infinite, Is his wrath also? Be it, Man is not so, But mortal doomed. How can he exercise Wrath without end on Man, whom death must end? Can he make deathless death? That were to make Strange contradiction, which to God himself Impossible is held; as argument Of weakness, not of power. Will he draw out, For anger's sake, finite to infinite, In punished Man, to satisfy his rigour, Satisfied never? That were to extend His sentence beyond dust and Nature's law; By which all causes else, according still To the reception of their matter, act; Not to the extent of their own sphere. But say That death be not one stroke, as I supposed, Bereaving sense, but endless misery From this day onward; which I feel begun Both in me, and without me; and so last To perpetuity;--Ay me!that fear Comes thundering back with dreadful revolution On my defenceless head; both Death and I Am found eternal, and incorporate both; Nor I on my part single; in me all Posterity stands cursed: Fair patrimony That I must leave ye, Sons! O, were I able To waste it all myself, and leave ye none! So disinherited, how would you bless Me, now your curse! Ah, why should all mankind, For one man's fault, thus guiltless be condemned, It guiltless? But from me what can proceed, But all corrupt; both mind and will depraved Not to do only, but to will the same With me? How can they then acquitted stand In sight of God? Him, after all disputes, Forced I absolve: all my evasions vain, And reasonings, though through mazes, lead me still But to my own conviction: first and last On me, me only, as the source and spring Of all corruption, all the blame lights due; So might the wrath! Fond wish!couldst thou support That burden, heavier than the earth to bear; Than all the world much heavier, though divided With that bad Woman? Thus, what thou desirest, And what thou fearest, alike destroys all hope Of refuge, and concludes thee miserable Beyond all past example and future; To Satan only like both crime and doom. O Conscience! into what abyss of fears And horrours hast thou driven me; out of which I find no way, from deep to deeper plunged! Thus Adam to himself lamented loud, Through the still night; not now, as ere Man fell, Wholesome, and cool, and mild, but with black air Accompanied; with damps, and dreadful gloom; Which to his evil conscience represented All things with double terrour: On the ground Outstretched he lay, on the cold ground; and oft Cursed his creation; Death as oft accused Of tardy execution, since denounced The day of his offence. Why comes not Death, Said he, with one thrice-acceptable stroke To end me? Shall Truth fail to keep her word, Justice Divine not hasten to be just? But Death comes not at call; Justice Divine Mends not her slowest pace for prayers or cries, O woods, O fountains, hillocks, dales, and bowers! With other echo late I taught your shades To answer, and resound far other song.-- Whom thus afflicted when sad Eve beheld, Desolate where she sat, approaching nigh, Soft words to his fierce passion she assayed: But her with stern regard he thus repelled. Out of my sight, thou Serpent! That name best Befits thee with him leagued, thyself as false And hateful; nothing wants, but that thy shape, Like his, and colour serpentine, may show Thy inward fraud; to warn all creatures from thee Henceforth; lest that too heavenly form, pretended To hellish falshood, snare them! But for thee I had persisted happy; had not thy pride And wandering vanity, when least was safe, Rejected my forewarning, and disdained Not to be trusted; longing to be seen, Though by the Devil himself; him overweening To over-reach; but, with the serpent meeting, Fooled and beguiled; by him thou, I by thee To trust thee from my side; imagined wise, Constant, mature, proof against all assaults; And understood not all was but a show, Rather than solid virtue; all but a rib Crooked by nature, bent, as now appears, More to the part sinister, from me drawn; Well if thrown out, as supernumerary To my just number found. O! why did God, Creator wise, that peopled highest Heaven With Spirits masculine, create at last This novelty on earth, this fair defect Of nature, and not fill the world at once With Men, as Angels, without feminine; Or find some other way to generate Mankind? This mischief had not been befallen, And more that shall befall; innumerable Disturbances on earth through female snares, And strait conjunction with this sex: for either He never shall find out fit mate, but such As some misfortune brings him, or mistake; Or whom he wishes most shall seldom gain Through her perverseness, but shall see her gained By a far worse; or, if she love, withheld By parents; or his happiest choice too late Shall meet, already linked and wedlock-bound To a fell adversary, his hate or shame: Which infinite calamity shall cause To human life, and houshold peace confound. He added not, and from her turned; but Eve, Not so repulsed, with tears that ceased not flowing And tresses all disordered, at his feet Fell humble; and, embracing them, besought His peace, and thus proceeded in her plaint. Forsake me not thus, Adam! witness Heaven What love sincere, and reverence in my heart I bear thee, and unweeting have offended, Unhappily deceived! Thy suppliant I beg, and clasp thy knees; bereave me not, Whereon I live, thy gentle looks, thy aid, Thy counsel, in this uttermost distress, My only strength and stay: Forlorn of thee, Whither shall I betake me, where subsist? While yet we live, scarce one short hour perhaps, Between us two let there be peace; both joining, As joined in injuries, one enmity Against a foe by doom express assigned us, That cruel Serpent: On me exercise not Thy hatred for this misery befallen; On me already lost, me than thyself More miserable! Both have sinned;but thou Against God only; I against God and thee; And to the place of judgement will return, There with my cries importune Heaven; that all The sentence, from thy head removed, may light On me, sole cause to thee of all this woe; Me, me only, just object of his ire! She ended weeping; and her lowly plight, Immoveable, till peace obtained from fault Acknowledged and deplored, in Adam wrought Commiseration: Soon his heart relented Towards her, his life so late, and sole delight, Now at his feet submissive in distress; Creature so fair his reconcilement seeking, His counsel, whom she had displeased, his aid: As one disarmed, his anger all he lost, And thus with peaceful words upraised her soon. Unwary, and too desirous, as before, So now of what thou knowest not, who desirest The punishment all on thyself; alas! Bear thine own first, ill able to sustain His full wrath, whose thou feelest as yet least part, And my displeasure bearest so ill. If prayers Could alter high decrees, I to that place Would speed before thee, and be louder heard, That on my head all might be visited; Thy frailty and infirmer sex forgiven, To me committed, and by me exposed. But rise;--let us no more contend, nor blame Each other, blamed enough elsewhere; but strive In offices of love, how we may lighten Each other's burden, in our share of woe; Since this day's death denounced, if aught I see, Will prove no sudden, but a slow-paced evil; A long day's dying, to augment our pain; And to our seed (O hapless seed!) derived. To whom thus Eve, recovering heart, replied. Adam, by sad experiment I know How little weight my words with thee can find, Found so erroneous; thence by just event Found so unfortunate: Nevertheless, Restored by thee, vile as I am, to place Of new acceptance, hopeful to regain Thy love, the sole contentment of my heart Living or dying, from thee I will not hide What thoughts in my unquiet breast are risen, Tending to some relief of our extremes, Or end; though sharp and sad, yet tolerable, As in our evils, and of easier choice. If care of our descent perplex us most, Which must be born to certain woe, devoured By Death at last; and miserable it is To be to others cause of misery, Our own begotten, and of our loins to bring Into this cursed world a woeful race, That after wretched life must be at last Food for so foul a monster; in thy power It lies, yet ere conception to prevent The race unblest, to being yet unbegot. Childless thou art, childless remain: so Death Shall be deceived his glut, and with us two Be forced to satisfy his ravenous maw. But if thou judge it hard and difficult, Conversing, looking, loving, to abstain From love's due rights, nuptial embraces sweet; And with desire to languish without hope, Before the present object languishing With like desire; which would be misery And torment less than none of what we dread; Then, both ourselves and seed at once to free From what we fear for both, let us make short, -- Let us seek Death; -- or, he not found, supply With our own hands his office on ourselves: Why stand we longer shivering under fears, That show no end but death, and have the power, Of many ways to die the shortest choosing, Destruction with destruction to destroy? -- She ended here, or vehement despair Broke off the rest: so much of death her thoughts Had entertained, as dyed her cheeks with pale. But Adam, with such counsel nothing swayed, To better hopes his more attentive mind Labouring had raised; and thus to Eve replied. Eve, thy contempt of life and pleasure seems To argue in thee something more sublime And excellent, than what thy mind contemns; But self-destruction therefore sought, refutes That excellence thought in thee; and implies, Not thy contempt, but anguish and regret For loss of life and pleasure overloved. Or if thou covet death, as utmost end Of misery, so thinking to evade The penalty pronounced; doubt not but God Hath wiselier armed his vengeful ire, than so To be forestalled; much more I fear lest death, So snatched, will not exempt us from the pain We are by doom to pay; rather, such acts Of contumacy will provoke the Highest To make death in us live: Then let us seek Some safer resolution, which methinks I have in view, calling to mind with heed Part of our sentence, that thy seed shall bruise The Serpent's head; piteous amends! unless Be meant, whom I conjecture, our grand foe, Satan; who, in the serpent, hath contrived Against us this deceit: To crush his head Would be revenge indeed! which will be lost By death brought on ourselves, or childless days Resolved, as thou proposest; so our foe Shal 'scape his punishment ordained, and we Instead shall double ours upon our heads. No more be mentioned then of violence Against ourselves; and wilful barrenness, That cuts us off from hope; and savours only Rancour and pride, impatience and despite, Reluctance against God and his just yoke Laid on our necks. Remember with what mild And gracious temper he both heard, and judged, Without wrath or reviling; we expected Immediate dissolution, which we thought Was meant by death that day; when lo!to thee Pains only in child-bearing were foretold, And bringing forth; soon recompensed with joy, Fruit of thy womb: On me the curse aslope Glanced on the ground; with labour I must earn My bread; what harm? Idleness had been worse; My labour will sustain me; and, lest cold Or heat should injure us, his timely care Hath, unbesought, provided; and his hands Clothed us unworthy, pitying while he judged; How much more, if we pray him, will his ear Be open, and his heart to pity incline, And teach us further by what means to shun The inclement seasons, rain, ice, hail, and snow! Which now the sky, with various face, begins To show us in this mountain; while the winds Blow moist and keen, shattering the graceful locks Of these fair spreading trees; which bids us seek Some better shroud, some better warmth to cherish Our limbs benummed, ere this diurnal star Leave cold the night, how we his gathered beams Reflected may with matter sere foment; Or, by collision of two bodies, grind The air attrite to fire; as late the clouds Justling, or pushed with winds, rude in their shock, Tine the slant lightning; whose thwart flame, driven down Kindles the gummy bark of fir or pine; And sends a comfortable heat from far, Which might supply the sun: Such fire to use, And what may else be remedy or cure To evils which our own misdeeds have wrought, He will instruct us praying, and of grace Beseeching him; so as we need not fear To pass commodiously this life, sustained By him with many comforts, till we end In dust, our final rest and native home. What better can we do, than, to the place Repairing where he judged us, prostrate fall Before him reverent; and there confess Humbly our faults, and pardon beg; with tears Watering the ground, and with our sighs the air Frequenting, sent from hearts contrite, in sign Of sorrow unfeigned, and humiliation meek

#ParadiseLost

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