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demisexual-kingdom · 5 years

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I am honestly really struggling right now and need to confess something. I'm asexual - but due to childhood abuse I am mentally ill and hypersexual. I'll be frank, it means I get turned on by really disturbing things but morally I know they are disturbing - my mental illnesses mean that I will self harm with masturbastion which I come to despise when I 'snap back' into myself from dissociation at also being sex repulsed) and am horrified. Can asexuality and hypersexuality coexist?

TW: self-harm, trauma.

Hi anon, I’m really sorry for the late reply, but it took us some time to figure out what to say.

Yes, asexuality and hypersuality can coexist. As you said, having sex for you is the result of traumas and it comes with other purposes or motives but sexual attraction.

Regarding the other issues, honestly, my best advice is that you should look for professional help, like a therapist. You feel bad about yourself doing what to do and I can only imagine how hard this is, especially when you find difficult to change these toxic patterns towards yourself.

If you feel the urge to cut yourself again, try to put some ice onto the place you usually use to self-harm. Ice numbs and calms you. It’ll bring a mildly sense of comfort, enough for you to put things straight and avoid hurting yourself.

I’m sorry for what happened to you and I hope you get better to live the fullest and happiest. Never forget that violence doesn’t define you and nothing of these is your fault. You’re nothing but a survivor, a strong person.

Sending my love

-Mod Paris

#ask #anon #answered #asexual #questioning #trauma

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