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#how many things did i start and then forget about

gamblersdoll · 22 hours

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HELLOOO how are youu? I want to ask could you write sukuna with a reader that has a succubus tattoo? You know the ones that go on your lower belly or back. PLS PLS PLS AND TY.

this scared me because im like literally finna get a succubus tattoo ! but of course! and im good!

cw: belly bulge mention, crappy sukuna, breeding kink if you squint.

any tattoos you get, he’s head over heels. (he wont tell you, of course.)

any arm tattoos hes biting at, especially when they are done healing because he’ll be damned if he fucks them up.

but a succubus tattoo? have you lost your fucking mind? do you not know how this man is??

once he figures out that you had gotten a succubus tat, its all over for you. he saw it, days after wondering what your deal was and not letting him see your stomach, not touching it, hell not even looking at it. (this caused many arguments.)

so instantly seeing it, your clothes are gone in a instant, find yourself on your back and knees spread wide the fuck open. you were aching by this point, tears streaming from your face as you clawed at his wide ass back.

“kuna pleeeassee!” you squeal, toes curling as he presses his thumbs into your slightly tender tummy. it was hell, feeling his thumbs dig into you and you couldnt do shit about it.

“so fuckin pretty.” he growls, feeling his fat, hard tip bulging through your skin. he reaches and grips your hair at the scalp–hard. he makes you look down to your stomach. “look at that shit, girl.” he groans, pressing his thumb on your lower stomach, watching the outline of your tattoo bulge from his fat tip.

“do you feel that?” he whispers, thrusts getting harder each second. he felt his balls starting to get tight, knowing hes about to breed your creamy pussy from the inside out.

by then, you thought it would be over.

“nah, you have another cock to please, did you forget?”

aside from the fact he goes crazy over that, any tattoos he’s basically taking care of them the old fashioned way. he was an old head, so it was a given he would do that.

and its one of the moments hes a little bit gentler than usual, knowing how sensitive it can be— ontop of you having sensitive skin all fucking ready.

so, if you decide to get a succubus tattoo, either three things can happen: youre being taken care of, nutted on, or youre expecting a little runt.

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ethereal-night-fairy · 2 days

Text

Silver Tongues, Like Bullets

Chapter 4

Werewolf!141 x Female Reader

Safe to say you aren't adjusting well to being kidnapped. With your anger at a all time high, names are being called and things are being thrown. Patient is running thin with the men, what lengths would they go to to set you straight?

Warnings: MDNI, violation of privacy, gay sex, cock stroking, masturbation, unconsentual nude viewing, dark themes, manipulation, forced proximity, reader comes from a religious household, childhood trauma, abusive parents, talks of self harm, description of self harm, violent behaviour from you, shouting, crying, name calling, mental breakdown, non-con touching, threats of punishment, You get spanked once in this chapter, sorry if I missed any.

Sometimes I forget how long editing can take me....

Silver Tongues Like Bullets Masterlist

Masterlist

Words: 7k

-28/11/2023

There were vile people in the world. Simon knew that. His pack knew that. You probably knew that. It was an obvious fact many people tended to ignore for their own convenience.

He witnessed that violence first hand as a boy and then again as a soldier. There were people in this world who'd exploit anyone for their own selfish gain. God awful people who'd do it to their own children. People who didn't deserve to have children in the first place. People like your parents.

He's heard you mumbling in your sleep at the cabin and a couple times here when you managed to fall asleep. It was often the same sentences repeated over and over again. ‘Need to get them out’ ‘are they safe?’ ‘my poor babies’. Your ‘babies’ here probably refer to your siblings if Ghost isn't mistaken. He couldn't find any evidence of you having children of your own. But seeing as it was you managing the majority of the childcare at home spoke volumes as to how you're treated by your parents. You had a lot of responsibilities starting from grocery shopping and food management down to school meetings and pickups. God knows what your parents did while you did their job for them. Unfortunately for Ghost he did know.

Ghost didn't consider himself a good person not by a long shot but looking at the information he pulled on your parents had his sanity slipping. He'd have strangled them both if he was given the chance.

But a digital trail of incriminating evidence would have to do. The worst punishment for a narcissist is exposing their lies and damaging their reputation. Digital trails can be quite damning if put in the wrong hands. Good thing they found their way to him. This would scratch his inch for blood. All he had to do was press send and their lives would come crumbling down. And that's exactly what he did. This would definitely help move the investigation about you along. The town already thought you committed suicide because of your parents. This story was a scandal within itself. Especially since your parents were aid workers employed by the church.

He did feel bad about your younger siblings though. Poor souls were sent to live with a relative for the time being. God knows what they're feeling right now being put in this difficult situation.

Your aunt seemed like a decent woman though, strangely enough you resemble her more than you do your mother and father. Gaz using his connections in the police force made sure she was someone that would keep the kids safe. She'd treat your brothers and sister better than your parents ever did. At least something good came out of this whole incident.

Ghost glances at his watch, it was late. He should be in bed with the rest of his pack and the newest addition to this family of his. It was a shame Gaz and Soap had already called dibs on the floor beside you. Not that you wanted them there.

You're much feistier than any of them anticipated. They couldn't really tell at the cabin because of how often they had to drug you. But Ghost quite enjoyed teasing you. Especially when you bit back at his remarks. It stirred a playful attitude in him that he hadn't experienced in a while. Not to say Johnny and Gaz weren't playful, but it was a boyish kind of playfulness with them.

This was different. He knew you were harmless which made it all the more fun when you tried fighting. It was a losing battle from the start yet you continued your struggle. It was endearing in the sort of way when a bunny runs amuck. He’ll enjoy making you all sweet and pliant in his hands. But that was a problem for another day. For now he'd enjoy the little moments he has with you. If you'd let him that is.

-30/11/2023

The situation was escalating. You absolutely wouldn't let anyone near you. Even when they were very sweet and understanding towards your drastic changes in moods. This wasn't what they had envisioned when they took you. That was weighing hard on the boys, especially when you wouldn't eat or drink. They were growing concerned about your wellbeing. Today was no different. Each meal time they tried making something you'd enjoy based on the pictures you posted on your Instagram. But you were adamant with your choice to ignore them.

Food was running low and they needed to go shopping before they left for their deployment. While they were at it they also wanted to buy you winter clothes and essentials for your room. You were probably sick of wearing their sweatpants and t-shirts anyways. They hoped this would warm you up to them even if it was only a little bit. It was decided Gaz and Soap would keep an eye on you until Price and Ghost got back.

Price gave strict instructions to Gaz and Soap before leaving. They were told to keep you calm above anything else and no funny business, that comment was aimed at Soap specifically. Ghost and Price didn't want to leave when you were so unstable but things needed to get done before their departure date.

It wasn't too hard finding what you needed considering they got their hands on your online purchase history. Excluding all the stuff you regularly bought for your siblings you didn't have much in terms of essential items that you used daily. It was all cheap stuff so the two men decided it would be nice to get you better quality clothes, skincare, shampoo and anything else they thought you'd like. Price had to text Gaz for that though. Gaz knew best out of all of them of what products to buy especially for hair.

The most indulgent thing you bought for yourself was your camera. And even that was bought secondhand. They felt guilty that it was partially their fault that it got ruined in the lake. But they swore to make it up to you. For now they focused on making your living space more comfortable. Maybe that would get you to eat. With all the groceries packed and a pretty bouquet of flowers in Ghost's hand they decided to go home to make a nice dinner for you.

Unfortunately for them in the short time they were gone, Soap had managed to upset you again. Upset you quite badly at that too. When they had gotten back with their hands full of blankets, bedsheets and clothing they were greeted with a messy living room with things thrown everywhere.

And to make it worse you were crying huddled in a corner. They didn't even have time to get the groceries before Price let out an audible sigh. They were barely gone for two hours this time. What could possibly have happened in such a short amount of time to make you cry like that? Gaz was trying to soothe you but you cried harder when he tried coming closer.

Soap was looking both upset and guilty sitting on the sofa quite a distance away from you. He was covered in new scratch marks, which in itself gave enough of an indication as to what might have happened. That man really couldn't keep his hands to himself even if he tried. But Price couldn't really blame him. Physical touch was his love language. It's the way he showed his affection for everyone. Which often could be mistaken as him being horny. When in reality he just liked the closeness physical touch brought. Though Soap is horny a lot of the time too.

He wanted to fuck Ghost the first week of meeting him and meeting Gaz wasn't much different. He's an insatiable wolf. They all knew that before forming this pack. But you were fairly new to all this so it wasn't fair for him to pounce on you so quickly. You needed time to adjust to the situation. He'll have to have a talk with Soap tonight after dinner.

“What happened?” Price hands over his bags to Simon.

“I was just trying to relax with her,” Soap muttered. Simon, taking the hint, takes a grumbling Soap with him after he's done sulking. They both leave to go get the groceries out and start on dinner.

“Soap wanted to take a bath with her,” Price approached carefully while listening to Gaz explain the situation.

“Want some privacy luv?” you sniffled to yourself as you looked at them extremely annoyed but nodded your head eventually. Seems like you were still holding a grudge. But you'll come around he knows it. Maybe they should let you get your anger out of your system so they can move past this.

“You can take a bath alone luv, just leave the door unlocked ok? We got you new pajamas, cute ones with strawberries on them.” You stare at them for a while before a soft ‘thank you’ leaves your mouth when Price hands you a bag with all your bathroom necessities.

The rest of the day was spent with you sitting in a corner mumbling to yourself and refusing to eat for yet another day even after they gave you the flowers and made you your favourite dinner. Though your lack of appetite was concerning. He knew you snuck sealed packaged food at night. You just wouldn't eat anything cooked by them. He supposes that it's their fault for drugging you. They'll have to build the trust back up slowly.

Price was growing concerned about when they'll have to leave you alone in the house. He was growing afraid you'd do something to hurt yourself. They were due to leave the coming Monday. But it wasn't like he could push back the deployment any further. They had finally got information on the shadow company and Graves. They weren't going to let that rat slip away again.

But they also had a responsibility to keep you safe. Maybe it would be better to take you with them for the time being. You could stay on base while they figure things out. It would also give you a chance to bond with them. Not that you showed any interest to do so.

Price wishes you'd take more of an interest in them. You just accepted their confession on being werewolves, not a single question was asked in that regard. There aren't many people they would share that information with so they were expecting more of a reaction from you. But they didn't get much of one. Apart from you promising to keep their secret if they let you go.

But then again Simon found your old Whittpad? Wattpad? (Was that how you say it?) history. Apparently it was some app to read stories on and you read your fair share of supernatural romances from what Simon had told him. He did reprimand Simon for digging into personal information about you. Price knows you wouldn't be happy if you knew they knew of your reading habits. Not that they'd judge you for it. Everyone has needs. If that was your preferred method of meeting them, it was none of their business. He did wonder if you learned any silly myths about them through those novels.

Overall the day wasn't the worst they experienced with you. You were clean, dressed nicely and got to use some of the stuff they bought you. Things only escalated when Soap tried apologising to you before bed but you didn't want to let him near you. Some not so nice things were said on your part. And you did end up throwing a few cushions at him to get him to leave.

But at least you looked refreshed dressed in your new pajamas and he knew you'd probably try to find something to eat when they'd ‘fall’ asleep. They'd have to enjoy the small victories for now. This was going to be a difficult journey but Price was a patient man. He knows you'll come around eventually. They just needed to give you time to adjust.

-nearing midnight

The laptop screen finally loaded up. It wasn't for the reason Ghost usually used it for. He needed to see those images of you again. You were strung up today especially after that incident with Soap in the afternoon. More things were thrown and some mean things were said. So Price thought it'd be best to let you sleep alone in the living room since all the doors were securely locked anyway, you weren't going to escape even if you tried.

But Ghost thought Price was being too lax with your increasingly violent behavior. They should nip this in the bud before you seriously injure yourself or someone else. But for now he'll follow the orders he's given. Which means no excessive snooping or going near you for any reason other than necessity.

Despite the violent outburst they were all looking forward to showing you your room tomorrow, just the bars on your window needed to be installed. You'd also get your own ensuite which would give you the added privacy you probably needed. Soap was getting a little impatient but so was he. He just wanted you curled up in arms already but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.

There was something bothering Ghost though. His suspicion started at the cabin when he had to undress you. Obviously there was so much going on that it was hard to focus solely on his suspicions but he was sure of what he saw. Your calves were littered with faded scars, he's sure the boys must have got at least a small glimpse of them already. No one has brought it up though. They could very much be old self harm scars. It was a very common occurrence with children in abusive households. He has plenty of his own. Thank god yours looked a couple years old. There weren't any new marks on you apart from a couple bruises you sustained in the forest.

As Ghost goes through your pictures again he realises why you wear stockings in all your pictures. You're never smiling either. There's not a single picture of you smiling. Not on your SD card or on your Instagram. He doesn't think he's seen you smile properly at the cabin either but that was a difficult situation and you were also sick. So that was understandable. He does want to make your life easier here, he wants to make you smile, make you feel loved but you were making things much more difficult than they needed to be.

As he goes through the picture lands on his favourite one. It wasn't one of the exposed pictures of you. You were just holding some wild flowers close to your face. You aren't smiling in it per se but there is a serene expression on your face. You looked the happiest he's ever seen you. Though he's only known you a little over a week but he wanted to make you feel safe. He did have a lapse in judgment at the cabin. His lust and anger spoke for him then. But he wanted to be better for you. He wanted to do better by you. He checks the date of when the picture was taken. And goes to check its correlation to your calendar.

(20/11/23 - 9:00-10:00pm waiting for callback from the London agency)

It was the date you received your job offer in London. His heart felt a little heavy, he felt guilty they took that from you but he had ampled doubt that you'd be able to escape your parents hold even if you did move to London. They'd still expect you to send money back home even if it meant you had to live in extreme conditions to survive in London. That was no life, you deserved better than that. They'll figure out a way for you to keep doing photography. But you needed to learn to trust them first and be a little less violent.

Ghost's door opens just as he's about to close his laptop.

“Ah’ve had enough! Ah made her ah sandwich but she didn't even touch it. Just stared at meh angrily until ah left! How am ah supposed tae be swee-” Johnny stops mid rant, his eyes zeroing in on the image on the laptop. Johnny stares at the screen until the realisation hits him that the pictures were of you.

“Ye greedy bastard! Ye could have told us that ye had them! Ah wouldn't have wasted meh time trying to imagine her naked.” Johnny in a huff just deposits himself in Ghost's lap clearly annoyed at the man for keeping your images to himself. Without asking for permission he quickly finds the picture he's looking for. Ghost wasn't surprised the picture he landed on. Soap was a simple minded man most days. He supposes it's time he makes it up to him, for keeping the pictures to himself.

“It's nae fair if yer the only one having fun! I'm telling Price about this in the morning.” Soap huffs pushing down his grey sweatpants and fishing out his hardening cock.

“Let me make it up to you pup. But you shouldn't treat her so roughly, she isn't like us. She needs time to warm up. Be patient with her.” Ghost lets out an apologetic purr as he nuzzles his nose into Johnny's neck, making sure to leave wet kisses behind as his hands take over Soap's movements on his cock.

“Ah'm nae forgiving ye that easily” Soap throws his head back feeling Ghost fist his cock with more vigor while his eyes stay glued to images of your naked flesh. This is the least he could do for him.

The rest of the night it spent with Johnny on his back begging (quite loudly) for more. He was insatiable with his rut probably approaching. Which was dangerous in this situation. You certainly weren't ready to have sex with all of them. When one of them goes into a rut they all follow pretty quickly. Ghost doesn't falter in his movements as he plows into Soap's stretched hole. Waiting for his knot to catch on Soap's spasming muscles. He thought about covering his hand over Soaps mouth but he desperately wanted you to hear what you were missing out on, on what could be yours if you allowed them to take care of you.

If the spanking was anything to go by it seemed you liked a little rough treatment. But you were still inexperienced so they needed to go slow with you. Kinks and safe words could always be figured out later. It's not long after Ghost's keen ears pick up on the moans of Gaz followed by grunts from Price and the slapping of skin. Seemed like everyone was pent up today. You probably wouldn't get any sleep with the noise they were making.

-01/11/2023

It's been four days, four days of you trapped in this hell, four days of you escaping their wandering hands, four days for you refusing to drink or eat in their presence. Last night being the worst of it all. They had finally let you sleep by yourself in the living room. But the whole night was filled with the noise of slapping skin and lewd grunts and wanton moans.

You bet they did it on purpose too. Your face felt hot remembering how slick and uncomfortable your aching pussy felt the whole night, especially when you had no outlet to relieve yourself. With their stupidly keen sense of smell and heightened hearing they'd know for a fact if you had touched yourself to the sounds of them fucking. It felt like you were trapped in a nightmare with no way out. You just wanted to be rescued already. Please God someone must be looking for you…please anyone…you needed to get home…for them if not yourself…

Your head was pounding, on the verse of bursting from the lack of nutrition and sleep. Your nerves are vibrating with fear, keeping you on your toes. You knew a chase was coming. They had just finished whatever they were doing in that spare room of theirs. The insistent clatter of tools and nails had finally ceased but now you were faced with an entirely new dilemma. A dilemma that involved four men cornering you.

‘Come look at your room’ they said, as if you didn't know that was code for ‘get in your cage’. You weren't stupid despite having ended up in this horrible situation. You knew you wouldn't see the light of day if they managed to get you in there.

Your forever prison. If and only if they get you in there. You didn't plan on entering another type of hell just after trying to escape the last.

“Darling! Please listen! Ow! Sto- Darling!” armed with another padded cushion you don't stop to listen to their stupid excuses as you yet again hurl the non lethal object at the person closest to you. That being Gaz.

We aren't trying to hurt you!”, safe to say you don't listen again as you circle the sofa for the umpt time in the last two minutes.

“Don't come near me! I don't want to look at the room!”

You've been tightroping on a knife's edge for the last four days, making sure they don't get their hands on you for any reason! You weren't going to let all your hard work go to waste! If you were honest it felt so much longer than four days. Hours felt like days when you're trapped in a cage, even if it was a golden one. Time goes so slowly when you have nothing to but wait to be rescued. You watch them circle around you like prey while you try to find any sliver of an opening to escape.

“Look, we know this situation isn't ideal but we promise it isn't forever. You can decorate it however you like later,” Were they purposely acting obtuse? You watch Price put his hands up in surrender. Trying his best to look non threatening while Ghost moves to watch everything unfold from the comfort of the far wall. Stupid prick… You hated the bastard. He's the reason you had to endure such a humiliating punishment.

You don't trust their pretty words, you've already made that mistake once. Well more than once but you get the idea. You weren't going to fall for it again. That you promised yourself.

Price stays back while the younger two of the four men decide to close in on you. They look at you with apprehension and pity. A sentiment you didn't appreciate. You wouldn't even be in the situation if it weren't for them. This entire situation was of their own making. They had no right to be angry with you. Not one bit, but it wasn't like that would stop them from trying to ‘punish’ you. Thankfully they've been busy sorting things out to do anything even with you getting increasingly more violent.

Gaz gives Soap a look and you know what's about to happen, you can tell they were about to pounce. You feel your nerves fraying with anxiety so with your weight pressed against your heels you ready yourself to run. They try creeping closer but the second they decide to take a definitive step you bolt.

“Darling that's enough! You need to stop fighting us!”, Price shouts as you swerve at the last second narrowly escaping the two men when they crowd you. You make a break for the kitchen not listening to their shouts as you evade their calloused hands. Thankfully you manage to get to the other side of the breakfast counter before either Gaz or Soap could reach you. Out of reflex you grab the nearest makeshift weapon at your disposal. That being a very expensive looking vase with the flowers they gifted you yesterday. The very first you ever received and you couldn't even appreciate them because they were given to you by your kidnappers. They both stand on the other side looking less than impressed by your choice of weapon.

“Sweetheart we just want to show you your room, that's all,” you hiss and bare your teeth at Gaz earning you an aspirated sigh from him.

“Don't come near! I-I'll hit you!”, your voice breaks which in turn pisses you off more. Strength! Embody Strength! You shout at yourself internally to steel your nerves. You needed more conviction in your tone to inspire fear. Even if it was only a little bit.

It's a stalemate. They looked annoyed, but more exhausted than anything else. Of course they'd be tired. They were getting fucked the whole night while you suffered….

You know you were making things worse for yourself but you didn't want to be locked in that room. Your chances of escaping would plummet. You just needed to hold out a little longer, just a little longer. Someone must be searching for you. Your friends, your family, at least one person would have reported you missing by now. They must have…you needed to get home…

You watch them with laboured breaths, waiting for them to spring at you again. Waiting for an excuse to get violent and get your built up frustrations out. Price pinches his nose in annoyance before giving up and going to sit on the sofa with Ghost following closely behind. It's only Gaz and Soap cornering you now.

“We promise ye’ll like yer room hen, we even got ye ah fluffy blanket and some plushies. Please stop being difficult. We just want tae take care ye.”

“Fuck off, I don't care! You? y-you?” You have to think for a second for an insult that would hurt them, that would make them dislike you. Maybe then they'd let you go.

“ Y-you?… you Dogs!” You instantly regret the words leaving your mouth kinda grateful you didn't end up calling them mutts. Gaz flinches at your raised voice, or more so at the word ‘Dogs’. Guilt floods your heart the second you see their hurt expression, an apology spills out of your mouth before your anger could block out your guilt.

“I'm sorry that was rude of me…but don't come near.” You look at them wearily, you didn't mean to be derogatory towards their biology. Not that you understood it but you didn't need to be rude about it. Their eyes soften at your apology but you still see the flash of hurt cross their eyes.

“I just want to go home, I promise I won't tell anyone about your secret. Please…please won't you let me go? I have people I need to take care of.” You brandish the vase with shaky hands because they were still on the offensive so you keep your guard up.

“We took you for your own good love. You weren't being treated well at home. We'll give you a better life here. You just need to allow us to.” You’re filled with disappointment at Gaz's words. You feel the ever familiar sting of tears tightening your waterline but you stay strong. No, don't cry! Don't show weakness!

“Hah? A better life? A better life? You must fucking kidding if you think I'd believe that!” You scoff at his ridiculous suggestion. You watch Soap try to approach again only for you to step back vase still in hand.

With your tears pushed down your building anger was rearing its ugly head again. It was boiling your blood to the point where you wanted to scald everything surface near you, you wanted to make everyone feel your pain. After years of working hard to appease your parents, trying to get them to see reason, saving money to escape the cage they put you in. You found yourself in yet another cage. The worst part was you only had two weeks until you left. Just two weeks…

Yet you found yourself locked in again, bound to a fixed location at the mercy of four strangers. This time the bars enclosing your freedom were tinted gold, but they were bars nonetheless. You were slowly losing any form of identity you built for yourself. Any form of escape you manifested was crumbling to the ground, much like an like your sanity. Fear was settling in, you felt it in your bones. The rattling was unsettling, this whole situation was. Why you? Why did it have to be you?

And to top it all off they were supernatural beings. You're more shocked how easily you accepted that fact than you are about them actually being werewolves. You attribute that to all the werewolf wattpad stories you read as a teen…. You had so many questions you wanted answered but you didn't want to ask them just in case they take it as your acceptance to being theirs.

“We'll give ye such ah great life here. Ye’ll want for nothing. We'll buy ye whatever ye want, whatever clothes, whatever makeup, whatever food. We'll even buy ye ah new camera. Ye can take as many naughty pictures as ye like.” You freeze at his words, blood running colder than rivers in the arctic. Shock marred your features as you tried to understand what you were hearing. Gaz clocked it first that Soap had just made a huge mistake. And Soap looked at you with guilt the second he saw your distraught face. They fumble with their apologies but you can't seem to hear. Cold blood rushing to your ears blocks out any sound from reaching you.

They saw…They looked through your camera….they saw you naked. They violated your privacy….

Before you were willing to forgive them for what they did at the cabin, namely because you thought they were helping you when you were sick. But they just needed a convenient excuse to get you naked didn't they? Fucking Perverts!

Feeling anger was an understatement, you were feeling down right ravenous for blood, for destruction. How fucking dare they!

“I WANT TO GO HOME! NOW! RIGHT NOW! I DON'T LIKE YOU! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE! LET ME GO YOU FUCKING PRICKS!” You scream your built up aggravation out at them. You flinch at your own anger. You've never had the guts to voice your anger out like this. The most you've ever done is slightly raise your voice which often ended up with you being backhanded by your dad. You've learnt to either stay silent or placate him with money. Money always seemed to work to calm him down. Money wasn't going to help you here.

It was different here. The one punishment they inflicted made you feel buzzed and tingling in all the sting places. And they haven't gotten maliciously violent with you yet. No matter how angry you'd get with them, they wouldn't threaten to harm you. Any aggression they faced at your hands was often met with patience and coos to soothe you as if you were a skittish bunny. That didn't excuse them of being perverts though. Especially Soap for that matter. That man had a problem keeping his hand to himself.

If the cooing didn't work they'd just let you tire yourself out. It often felt like you were talking to a brick wall when they'd get like this. If your screaming bothered them they didn't let it show, only looks of pity crossed either of their faces. Which only served to aggravate you even more. Gaz tries to take a step closer but you just take another set back continuing to let your frustrations out as tears prickle your already bloodshot eyes.

“DON'T COME NEAR ME! I'll hit you! D-don’t...*sob*..come near..*cries*,” a wave of fatigue washes over you while you raise the vase as a warning. Everything you knew was crumbling around you. You felt sick to your stomach despite not having eaten properly in days.

“Can ye pick ah different vase? Me nan gave meh that…”

You're stunned into silence for a second, your tears also drying up. You’re discombobulated at his, your mind racing to understand what he just said. Guilt sits heavy on your chest as the words unjumble in your head. Your arms immediately lower as an apology leaves your mouth far too easily for your liking.

“Oh..*sniffle* I'm so sor- wait…why the fuck should I care!?"

Right!? Why should you care? You should be angry, you should be breaking things.

But despite you trying to school yourself on maintaining a front, your grip becomes shaky and you're forced to return the vase to its original place. You glare at the two men angrily having put the vase down despite wanting to smash. No matter how bad you wanted to hurt them, this just seemed excessively cruel.

“Thanks for putting down the vase hen. Come on now mah sweet girl, promise ye’ll love yer room.” You stare at him incredulously, more accurately at his audacity.

Tears blur your vision again as you curse your frustrations out at them for the hundredth time today.

“This is your fault! I'm like this because of you! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you…” You close your eyes for a split second to clear the falling tears, unfortunately for you that's when both of them take the opportunity to block your escape from either side. You can't do much other than struggle with your limited energy. You haven't been eating out of spite for the last few days. And running around definitely didn't help your situation. Everyone was on edge and your tantrums weren't helping.

Soap wraps his bulky arms around you as gently as he could while whispering his insincere apologies to you. You shout at him not to touch you, to get his ‘filthy hands’ off you. All you were doing was wasting your breath though. Which just serves to aggravate you more. You're upset, you're angry and down right exhausted. You just wanted to go home. The cage at home was better than here. At least you were close to escaping that one.

Soap hoists you up in his arms carrying you towards the living room while Gaz trails behind looking upset and guilty. It seems everyone was at their wits end today. And the boys were due to be deployed this coming Monday, you heard them say as much. Why couldn't they just leave already. You didn't want to be near these perverts.

Once you come into Price's view he ushers Soap to deposit you in his lap while Ghost fiddles with the TV channels. The fight has left you now, you're just limp in Soap's arms while you silently cry out your muddled emotions. Soap gently deposits you on Price's lap and immediately your face is pushed to his neck where you cry harder.

“Our pretty Bunny, it's ok, just cry it out.” Nothing was ok, you weren't ok! You weren't safe from their touches.

“I know. I know. It's ok baby, let us take care of you.” You huff out in anger trying to escape his hold but you just don't have the energy to fight them anymore. So your face remains pushed to the crook of his neck while you're forced to inhale the smell of his aftershave. The worst part was that the scent was soothing your frayed nerves. You inhale the smell of the forest and something slightly fruity and sweet. Strawberry….When did he eat strawberries? You wanted some… You weren't going to tell him that though. Your stomach grumbling does that for you. Traitor…

“Everything we've done we've done for your betterment. I know you're hurt now but you'll understand eventually. Just let us love you darlin. Promise we'll take such good care of you.” You stay silent not knowing how to respond to their bullshit. You'll just have to figure out a way to escape once they leave.

“What is it luvvie? Why are you so pent up today? Do y’need some help making yourself cum? We can smell y’slick cunt since last night.” Ghost coos at you while trying to find a channel to watch on the TV. Your blood boils at his words, your anger that's been simmering erupted like a volcano.

“As if I'd let you monsters touch me! Delete my pictures you fucking perverts!” The simmering violence in you burst out unexpectedly as you grab the spare remote near you to hurl it at his head, hitting him pretty hard.

“Fuc- Ow!” Ghost clutches his covered head. You feel bad immediately after you realise what you've done. You don't even get a chance to apologise before Price is restraining your arms while everyone tuts at your actions. You watch as Gaz goes to check-in on Ghost, they remove his mask away from your sight. Probably checking for any serious injuries.

You hear Price sigh heavily beside you when everything seems fine with Ghost. So you're assuming he wasn't too badly hurt, probably just a little stunned you actually tried hurting him. Before you can try to escape and run you feel an iron grip on your arms halting you. It was just shy of bruising so when you tried to push away from him you weren't expecting him to growl so inhumanly at you, or with so much anger. He seemed pissed, very pissed. Maybe you should apologise but you were too scared to do anything other than try to escape.

“Ghost was right. We can't have you getting violent like this. I think it's about time we teach you a lesson luv. This behaviour has gone on too long.” His voice was deceptively calm, while you only heard grunts of approval from the other men. Your emotions were all over the place on one hand you felt bad for hitting Ghost on the other you wanted to escape by any means, even if that meant you hurting them. You still can't believe they’ve seen your pictures. The humiliation just doesn't stop, does it?

Price had you bent over his knee before you could realise what was happening. You're made aware of the power imbalance from the get go. There was no way you'd escape his hold. If you weren't going to be able to hurt them physically while you struggle, you think perhaps you could use your words instead. The first flurry of curses leaves your mouth as wrists are captured and pinned to the small of your back.

“I hate you! You stupid assholes! Perverts! You don't care about me! Let me go!” You repeat the same sentences over and over and over again. Until your own ears felt like they were bleeding.

“Don't make things harder for yourself sweetheart. I think we've been too soft on you if you're acting like this.” This whole time you felt Price's large hand caressing your back down to your ass cheeks. Giving the plush of your bottom a mean pinch before landing a hard slap over your pajama bottoms. You bite down a groan as the sting travels down to your already drenched cunt. No doubt they know you've been soaked since last night.

“What do you think Simon? How do you want to punish her?

Ghost comes into view, mask still on. Only his obsidian eyes were on display. They looked eerily devoid of emotions. You expected him to be more angry than he looked but then again looks are often deceiving. Soap moves out of his way as he crouches to be level with your face. His glove covered hands come up to wipe away the tears staining your face. He was surprisingly gentle when caressing you.

“That throw was personal wasn't it luv? I'll be nice and forgive you if you apologise.” You shake your head to the best of your ability only to be rewarded with a chuckle. You just glare at him seeing that he found the situation funny.

“How about this? You have a nice big dinner with us and you don't have to get a spanking. But you have to finish your food. Doesn't that sound nice?” You glare not wanting to give the satisfaction of doing what they say. Or getting potentially drugged again. Even though you were extremely hungry. Your stomach being the treacherous bitch she is decides this is the moment she wants attention on her and growls for everyone to hear. Gaz and Soap just watched you with sympathy and you hated that even more. You didn't need their pity. You didn't want their care or affection. You just wanted to go home.

“Oh you poor thing, you shouldn't be so cruel to yourself. Come on… all you have to do is have some dinner. It's either that or Price here spanks you so hard you'd be unable to walk without wincing in pain.” You hate that he was making a reasonable offer. It just pissed you off more that they got to pick and choose when they wanted to be cooperative with you.

“So what do you say? Y'want to be good for us?” You glare but don't answer straight away knowing you'd probably get yourself into more trouble. You weigh the options out. Your fear and anger waging a war in your head as you do so. In the end your anger wins. You weren't going to submit to their whims; it was the only thing you could control right now. And you needed the sense of control more than you needed food.

“Fuck you! I want my pictures deleted, you asshole!” That sentence sealed your faith for the night.

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epickiya722 · 3 days

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Of course, Izuku can't have his moment without some people having an issue about it.

Not surprised, anything involving Izuku Midoriya someone is going to hate and has been for almost 10 years now.

Here's the thing that honestly has pissed me off about the fandom. And you know what, I know some of you are going to think I'm a bitch about this, but at this point? I don't care. I'm now at a limit that has been pushed.

When it comes to Izuku Midoriya, some of you seem to forget that he is an individual. This is still HIS story he's telling.

Look, I got my ships, but damn it. Sometimes, I want these characters to still be perceived as their own characters.

Katsuki showing up this chapter was enough for me. Yes, he is a big part of Izuku's story, but... I feel like it would not be right for him to be more included in AFO and Shigaraki's ultimate defeat.

Last time I checked, Katsuki was only a temporary OFA user... FROM A MOVIE. His journey didn't completely evolve around One For All. Izuku's did.

When Katsuki was having his awesome moments fighting AFO when he was a kid and a baby (AFO), I ain't seen no one going "Oh, Izuku should be by his side, BakuDeku" or anything like that. No, y'all was cheering Katsuki on and seemed satisfied that Izuku served as support.

That's all this fandom ever does is see as Izuku as support for Katsuki, just he always has to have his story evolve around Katsuki and nothing else.

He's the main character, but with some of you? He's not allowed to have his own moments to shine. He's not allowed to think about anything else but Katsuki. He's not allowed to put down the villain he was meant to face unless Katsuki is there to take the shine away.

Be honest, that's how you feel, isn't it?

Like, damn, Katsuki already won the last how many popularity polls!! When are y'all going to rest and let Izuku Midoriya be front row and center in his own damn story?!

I don't hate Katsuki, but I'm starting to dislike a lot of his fans.

Same for Shoto.

Look, Shoto also being more involved like how some of y'all wanted for this chapter would make no fucking sense to me. His fight was always meant to be against Dabi. His story involved his family. Izuku wasn't there fighting Dabi, so why in the hell should Shoto share some of the big moment when Izuku takes out ShigAFO?

How would that be fair for Izuku?

Some of you didn't even like Izuku being involved with the family drama and later he wasn't for the big fight because the Todoroki Family Drama wasn't for him.

As with Katsuki, Shoto is still a supporting character. He's a big one, but oh my gosh!!

I literally just woke up and the bull I'm already seeing is ridiculous, it is.

Sometimes, I feel like some of you who think they know the story haven't been paying attention at all. Some of you, I feel have that "this character should have been the main character" mentality so when Izuku does MC things, you go into some frenzy over it. Some of you, I feel should take off the damn shipping goggles and for once realize that these characters are still individuals and percieve them as such. Horikoshi, if you read this... don't make any ship canon. The fandom can settle for fics.

Ten years... for ten years... as much as some of you demean Katsuki for his actions, you act just as he did towards Izuku. Treat Izuku like some damn punching bag. You don't even have to like the story, I don't give a damn.

He gets moments to shine, it's a problem. "No, this character should be---" Just stop!

I'm not saying Horikoshi's writing is perfect. I'm not saying you have to like Izuku. I'm not even saying I'm an expert on BNHA because I'm still learning the story, too.

But what I am saying is, and it's going to sound bitchy, is that y'all are so blinded and muddled by your criticism and shipping that you're quick to make judgments. You're quick to rush and not sit back and really try to understand what's going on and your hatred or indifference towards Izuku is just doing a disservice to not just the story, but to yourselves. The way some of you think will ruin the experience for you and some of you sound like jerks, for real.

Like, every character is important to BNHA in some way, yes. But what about Izuku Midoriya? Doesn't his importance matter, too?

Or is he just some character for you to hate on or some character you only value for shipping purposes?

Feel how you about this chapter (even though it was just leaks and not the officially out chapter, let alone THE WHOLE DAMN STORY!! BNHA AIN'T FINISHED YET!!), I don't care.

But oh my gosh... do better, just do better.

It isn't just this fandom. It's all fandoms. There's this trend now of "criticizing" the main characters or saying "they're not really the MC" or how their value as a character for shipping purposes.

This can apply to any character, but right now I'm focusing on main characters.

When it comes to main characters, you should understand them most of all to understand the story and a lot of you or at least the loud minority have failed drastically.

#i mean it is still HIS damn story #i get some criticisms like pacing alright #but come on #izuku get behind me 99.8% of this fandom don't care about you #'but i do--' no you don't no the fuck you don't #just kiya's thoughts #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha 423 #bnha manga spoilers #bnha spoilers #bnha leaks #mha leaks #midoriya izuku #izuku midoriya #deku

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scientia-rex · 2 hours

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Hi Dr. Kristophine, do you have any advice on what kind of information doctors need for medical issues that are more nebulous than "my knees hurt"? I've been feeling Weird and Bad in a way that has me concerned, but I'm afraid to make an appointment because I don't know what to say that will get the Weird and Bad feeling across in an actionable way. Going to the doctor takes SO much energy that I don't have to waste and I don't want them to just take a blood test and say everything's fine go home (again).

The best thing you can do with medical information you're trying to prepare for your medical provider, as a lay person, is be as specific as possible.

-Location: Is it one place in particular, or everywhere? Does it stay in one place, or move around?

-Timing: When did it start? Did it come on suddenly or slowly? Does it happen continuously? Does it come and go? Is it always there to some extent, but it gets better and worse? On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being fine and 10 being the worst you can imagine, how bad is it at its best, and how bad is it at its worst? How much time does it spend really bad vs only kind of bad?

-Quality: If it's pain, is it aching, burning, stabbing, dull, electrical zap, etc.? If it's not pain, what is it? Is it discomfort? Is it weakness--i.e., you can't do that thing? Is it fatigue--like maybe you can still push through doing the thing but it feels like you're trying to wade through mud to do it? Is it a racing heart, sweating, pressure?

-Triggers: Does something in particular set it off? A time of day, a food, an action, a medication, a thought? A surprisingly common trigger for migraines is sitting still with your neck in one position. (New research suggests that necks are critical to migraine formation, to which I yelled out loud at the paper, no duh!) There may be triggers you haven't noticed; try keeping a symptom diary, where you note down when you have episodes and what you were doing beforehand, what you ate that day, menstrual phase, etc. Any detail that you can remember, whether or not it seems relevant at the time.

I cannot tell you how many times I've dug deeper into a chronic issue only to discover that the patient can, in fact, tell me what the trigger is, but because it's something important to them, they simply haven't noticed. May subconsciously even avoided noticing. Do you get migraines every time you DM? Do you need to work a stretch break into your D&D session?

There can also absolutely be multiple triggers--I know I'll get migraines if I don't sleep, if I'm sick, if I sit still for too long, if I have dental work, etc.

So bring in all the info you can. Write it down if you're afraid you'll forget. Don't hand it to the MA, too many doctors will go "oh my GOD they brought a LIST how high-maintenance" and tune out. Hang on to it but tell them about everything.

I don't expect patients to be able to tell me "I believe I've had a left radial styloid fracture" but I do expect them to tell me "I fell and tried to catch myself with my left hand and now my wrist hurts," and that's good enough. The rest of it is my job. When it's something more vague, like "I started feeling different and bad about six months ago," any other information helps. Did you start a new med around then? Are you going through menopause? Do you struggle with anxiety? Do you have first-degree relatives (parent, sibling, or child) with genetic disorders, autoimmune disorders, etc.? Do you have a history of anemia? Are you vegan? Have you started having night sweats and unexplained weight loss? Did you recently travel internationally? This can go a lot more different directions than a hurty wrist, so bring in all the info you can.

And keep in mind that modern medicine is very limited--much more so than most people think. There is an excellent chance that medicine will not be able to diagnose your condition. It may still be able to offer treatment. It may fall on your shoulders to manage it as best you can, knowing that doctors don't have answers. Nobody can tell me why I have chronic pain, and I don't mean as in "I've asked doctors and they don't know," I mean "I've personally scoured the literature and had the relevant and appropriate tests and no one can know at this phase of medical knowledge." So I deal with it, I've stopped trying to push myself past my reserves because people who can't admit to ignorance tell me to, I keep my painful body moving because that helps, I do PT, I take a multivitamin occasionally because I know my diet sucks. I manage.

There are not always right or wrong answers--I don't take gabapentin, because I don't want the sedation and kidney exposure, but patients with my exact symptoms might find it helpful and may find the risks and costs worth the benefits. My mother, who has whatever it is that I have, right down to the tricky stomach, from whom I presumably inherited it, has taken medication at different points in her life, depending on how much pain she was in and what other responsibilities she has, and that is perfectly reasonable. Autonomy matters. People have to be able to make these choices for themselves, with assistance but not paternalism from their medical professionals, because the math is different for everyone.

#the attending dr. kristophine #listen I feel very strongly about autonomy #I am here to help not to dictate from on high

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yarrayora · 2 days

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I actually really love ur interpretation of farcille where falin and marcille have a... Difficult time together. Because it annoys me when people treat their relationship like the most important one and also like they're completely perfect for each other. Because they're not! The bath scene itself is an example of how they're not completely on the same page yet. Marcille treats Falin like a precious toy to look over, even when she's clearly uncomfortable, and when Falin starts asking questions (because she knows something is up), Marcille shuts it down. Marcille doesn't treat Falin as an equal. Also the bits in the daydream hour where it implies Marcille wants Falin to dress a certain way or cut her hair a certain way because it looks good to Marcille.

Not to say that Marcille is evil, or even completely in the wrong. I think Falin has a bit of a bad trait where she doesn't talk about things that upset the ones she loves. There was an extra comic, if I remember correctly, from Falin and Marcille's school days, about Falin bringing food to Marcille's room and Marcille would just be like "??? What???" And eventually Falin just stops going to Marcille's room. But then later Laois explains that Falin was trying to get Marcille to eat with her, but eventually gave up without speaking about it at all. Or how she did drop the topic of her resurrection even though she knew something was wrong and deserved to know what was going on. And while she was under the influence of the dungeons magic, it's pretty in character of her to go hungry and not say anything because someone she loved (Thistle in that moment) wanted her food.

And that's not even getting into how many fans erase how important Laois is to BOTH of them and how much he loves them as well. (Marcille was definitely not his biggest fan in the beginning, but I think you could make the argument that by the end, she cherishes him almost, if not just as, much as she cherishes Falin. Not even in a shippy way)

Anyway. All this to say, I love farcille but they're not a perfect couple right now. I actually really like that ending you imagined a while ago where they never put a label on things and falin dies old and happy but Marcille keeps thinking of "what could have been". I think that's really the only way their relationship can end (unless they COMMUNICATE in the case of Falin and LISTEN in the case of Marcille)

here's the scene you mentioned!

i think theres a scene in a different chapter showing more of this but i cant remember lol so im not sure if falin stopped or not. but considering how falin grew up as a conveniently good kid for her parents i think it's in-character for her to give up in fear of bothering marcille

which is in line with chimera falin's attitude (WHICH IS SO COOL THAT HER CORE AS A PERSON REMAINS UNCHANGED DESPITE THE DUNGEON'S INFLUENCE)

and yes i think a lot about how laios is the reason they even go on the dangerous quest to save falin! he is what convinced marcille and chilchuck it's not too late for her! because they know hes knowledgeable about monsters, so if he thinks they can still save her then it must be possible! on the contrary, as shown by the official roleswap comic where falin and laios swapped places, she couldn't convince the party, not even marcille, to go save laios with her. further showing that laios is the person they trust as their leader

also regarding marcille and laios i think people sometimes forget that despite their difference branch of passions both of them are hungry for knowledge

hell, she might be the only one in the party beside laios who is in it for the sake of knowledge instead of glory and wealth (toshiro is in it to prove himself as a warrior, namari having to make up for her father's misdeed, chilchuck for the betterment of his people, and falin who is still at the stage of following laios and marcille's whims)

honestly i think it's inevitable for The Most Popular Ship to be sandpapered. in the end, shipping is about having fun with barbie dolls that have no agency to protest about how theyre being treated and we the shippers are gods ruling over fanon

but im also. kinda petty about it lol.

#dungeon meshi #dunmeshi analysis

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floweredtatamis · 3 days

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All his parts have been finished...

Some days ago I started working on @psychic-pigeons 's Chilchuck pattern and today is finally the day when I put him together. The pattern was actually really easy to follow and fun to do, and even when I struggled, psychic-pigeons was kind enough to take time out of his day to answer my questions kindly and clearly. I had so much fun I took a lot of pictures, that I'll be posting here! I changed a few things out of laziness, but overall I stuck with the pattern!

I started with the head and the arms and I had no problem, then went to the legs and body. I really like the shape of the feet, and the fact that they are a single piece together with legs and torso made it very sturdy. But one thing I couldn't get over was how fucking cute the little boots were... I played a lot with them, and I enjoyed putting them on and off maybe a bit too much.

I had some trouble with the shirt and thought of winging it and making a different one, but with pigeon's help I managed to finish the shirt and I'm glad I didn't change it... It's adorable... Something that I really like is that all clothes are actually clothes, and you can take them on and off. I had a lot of fun dressing and undressing my poor headless armless Chilchuck.

One thing I did differently (apart from the belt and pouch that I winged at the end) was the vest. If you know one thing about me is that I hate sewing, so I couldn't see myself making all the squares individually and then sewing them together... So I used the same tunisian crochet technique and diagram of the original to make two pieces and embroidered the panels on top afterwards. Here they both are on top of my dinner table together with plenty of breadcrumbs.

I dressed his body with the clothes and... Made the mistake of putting his shirt backwards... I corrected it and then... Put his vest backwards so I had to undress him again...

(I pinned the collar for a bit to make it stay flatter, but I removed them later)

I suck at embroidery, so I was very scared of doing the face. For how much I suck at it, I think it looks very good!

The hair I didn't take as many pictures, but imagine his head full of pins. I did the individual strands first before the "crown", and worked in sections making sure each one was dry and secure before taking the pins out and moving to the next part. I used liquid silicone.

And with that I sewed his head in and he was complete!

I had a lot of fun. The pattern is a delight and I learnt a lot throughout too. If you were on the fence of making your own, take this as a sign to do it! I love my little guy. My mum calls him her grandson.

Also don't forget to show support to @psychic-pigeons ! Making patterns is hard enough without considering writing them down and explaining them, and his pattern is in my opinion a 10/10. Thank you for the chance to make one as well!

Sadly my Chilchuck doesn't squeak, but maybe eventually I'll make him a hermit crab inside a box to sit on top of (eventually... This took me four days and my hands hurt).

#psychic-pigeons #dungeon meshi #chilchuk tims #crochet #amigurumi #he's more of a doll than an amigurumi though

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laura1633 · 2 days

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Ah not about a fic but yes about Max’s skill! There's so much recency bias that people have forgotten what he achieved from 2015-20 in cars which really weren't the most competitive and even in 21 the mercs still had the advantage! Genuinely who else was consistently on the podiums and getting a couple of wins per season in cars which were plagued by reliability issues and not able to match the lead cars on pure pace at all. The Ham-Bot-Ver era in 2020’s slow car proved why people were calling him a future world champion even if you ignored all the previous signs, and people complaining about his dominance seem to forget he's had the best car for 2 years only (counting from a little bit into 22 as at the start the Ferraris were matching the red bull).

The car by itself would probably be equal to Checo’s performance- good but he's not consistently second with a 20 second gap to the others. There would be more race winners even if the championship was secured. The thing people forget is that Max has been consistently outdriving his machinery since his toro rosso days- I don't get why people think that that trend would change now he's in a better car.

Sorry for the rant! Just excited by Max appreciation there's so many haters around!

Oh no need to apologise at all - I’d be happy to read Max appreciation asks all day long and I love everything you have said here ❤️

I have seen quite a few people talking as if Max has had the fastest car all his career, it makes no sense to me. I think some people have very short memories. You are 100% correct in what you have said, he has always out driven the car and achieved more than would be expected of him. People only need to look at how many wins and podiums he achieved before he even had a dominant car and they would realise how much of a difference he makes as a driver. That’s before you even consider his karting career and the fact he was brought into F1 so young (he really did his learning on the track, something I think some people give no credit for and use against him time and time again).

I think it is completely wrong to put his achievements these past few years down to just the car. Is the car good? Yes of course it is, there is no denying Red Bull have produced a great car (and have a great strategy team, great pit stops etc) BUT I believe that Max has made that car seem more dominant than it is. I think he has performed so well that he’s not got getting the credit he deserves because he makes it seem easy - when it is not easy at all. It’s not easy to hit those win streaks even if you do have the fastest car on the grid. He is just so consistent. If you took Max out of that car and put another driver in I don't think the car would look as dominant as it does in his hands.

I hope when people look back they will realise what a special driver he is. It’s just a shame people can’t appreciate greatness whilst it is happening.

#laura1633 asks #Max Verstappen #MV1 #MV33

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bananacatmeow · 4 hours

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hey! I don't know how many people will read this, but if you do, please tag any who you think might not know what im about to say.

okay? let's go.

I'd start by saying i love and appreciate all of you so so much, and im very grateful i found you all in my life. please believe me when i say im so happy i walked into such a great community on here, one that appreciates me just as much as i appreciate them. i love you all so so so much.

unfortunately it pains me to say that i have to leave now. i cant specify why, but i'll let you know that im alive and well, just not in the capacity to be using any sort of social platforms as i am currently not in the right place of mind for that. (dont worry! im alright haha)

again, it has truly been a wonderful experience with all of you, it would be wrong to ask you all to wait for me, because even i don't know when i will be back, so, until then, take care of yourselves my friends, and i hope you all have wonderful lives here on forth. i hope you find love in this world, i hope you have a great life ahead and find meaning to your existence. i hope you achieve everything you ever dreamed of achieving. i hope the sun shines on you always.

im sorry for all the things i might have promised during this time that i did not get to complete. trust me, i would have if i could, but i really can't right now. im sorry. i hope you will forgive me one day.

remember that you are all wonderful people and each and every one of you deserves love and care in this world. if one day you find yourself doubting on that, remember me and remember that i still love you and will think about you till i die, i promise i wont forget.

oh this is painful to write ahaha,, i never expected id have to but.. well, anyways. theres probably more i have to say, im sure ill remember even more stuff that i should have said even after i send this but since this feels like a letter now, ill sign off properly.

with love always, ina.

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highpri3stess · 22 hours

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If you're seeing this now, I'm not online and, this is queued. I wrote this on Thursday before my journey, so yeah.

My initial "fuck you" post was quite mean spirited. As much as you people might not believe me, I hated the way it ended up sounding.

There are a lot of things that are far more important than me whining about my own problems going on, really. I could use this as a rant to talk about how people only care about serious issues now and are making rallying posts now, when I was trying to talk about it in January, especially "big" blogs, but honestly, I do not care anymore. It hurt initially that I was ignored and seen as a nusiance, but I'm over it. As long as the people who need these funds gets it and get out safely from Gaza, then I'm happy creators for palestine is taking root on tumblr as well. I wish I could join, but honestly, I'll just use my tiktok and youtube to try and help and generate money in any way I can. This is not me trying to "look" like a good person. I am not. The ongoing genocide is far bigger than anyone, and as long as people are protesting and generating money for the people, I'm happy. Please go ahead and help these creators to get to a goal and help a family in palestine. Also reblog gofund me's for Congo and Sudan and donate to them if you can, please. I'll also see if I can rally people at school to donate too or at least talk about it, but with how Nigeria is so pro-isn'treal, hope is bleak.

Now, to address my reasons for going. I'm seeing some anonymous asks as I've arrived on my blog to make this post asking me "Why are you leaving?"

Well, it's simple really. I could just say severe racism and go my way but it's more than that.

I would like to start with myself really as the main problem:

Ever since I was young, I wanted to do the right thing. But in the end, the right thing isn't always necessarily the right way to go. This account was made when I was going through the most stressful and painful time of my life. I hated medical school. I was recovering from the trauma of being sexually abused and consequently reminded that I would never get justice. My old tumblr wasn't going anywhere either and I wanted a fresh start, at least something working. If I say this account helped me through hard times, I'd be lying. It made me forget about my problems and then I return to reality and nothing has changed. I've frankly gotten myself into so many spats and spoken to many people with vitrol in the name of doing the right thing without checking myself. I've broken friendships and hurt people with my words and my actions, without being level headed and asking questions first. I've done so much hurt, I don't think the good I intended to do would outweigh it.

Even with people who have done something wrong or wronged me, I overreacted. It was not right of me and I don't want anyone who follows me to think it was or is right. I've made up excuses for myself over and over again when I respond with a vile comment or even with a threat and it is time for me to stop that consciously. The people who said I was immature or too sensitive were right. As an adult, I'm am supposed to be well adjusted to my emotions. I'm no longer 18. I am 20. I will be treating people who will say worse things and I must do the work to adjust.

To anyone I've hurt, justified or unjustified, I humbly apologize. It was wrong of me to react that way. You do not have to forgive me, truly, or accept my apology. I would like to just apologize. My actions were and are inexcusable.

Secondly, the Saetoru/Tee situation:

If you were or you weren't here, it doesn't really matter. Tee did something horrible to me and my mutual and I can't forgive them. I've longed for an apology and for her to change her ways, but honestly, you can take a horse to the river but you can't force them to drink from it. This is me closing the chapter on that. Honestly, the best thing for anyone to do when it comes to her is just block her and anyone associated with her. Giving her attention does nothing but feeds her ego and reacting to her probably tickles her fancy. Sometimes, the best solution for people is just going no contact with them.

To anyone I hurt in the crossfires or put under stress, I'm sorry. I should not have done it and I should have faced Tee head on, alone and not involved any of you. To the person who sent the post to papersirens, I have forgiven you. You may have caused me pain, but being angry at you forever is not the way to go.

Thirdly, Monsters:

I've done a lot of blaming towards the readers for being rude, but at the end of the day, it doesn't matter. That fic has caused a lot of pain and anguish and gathered a very toxic audience that frankly scares me. I grew up in the fanfic community with the knowledge that positive interactions helps with boosting the writers morale, but honestly, I am yet to see how being racist to me or rude to me would boost my morale. Being mean to me over my own story does the opposite- it discourages me. As a result, the last comment as at tuesday was my last straw. I will never write that fic again. Not even when I have time. That project has been muddied with racism and vileness I can't even look at the folders without bursting into tears. It's better for all of us to break up from that toxic relationship. Like some of you said, there are better fics, so please read those instead.

Lastly: Will I ever return to tumblr?

Yes. But never on this account. It might not even be this year even. Or it might be. Who knows? You won't even know it's me anyways unless you have my discord. I'd like a fresh start and a rebrand and frankly to distance myself from the vile person I am now.

Final thoughts:

My advice to you all is to protect black writers. Many of us are leaving the platform due to antiblackness and hostility. Frankly, this app would be nothing without the countless black artists whom many of you get your ideas from. They are the pinnacles of this app and without them there is not fandom. Take care of them. Please.

-Monica.

#monica.speaks ♡#monsters ♡#moots ♡

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that-basic-simp · 1 day

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Girl With The Wave Tattoo PT. II

A/N: I sincerely and deeply apologize for not getting this out sooner. Tumblr did not notify me that a couple people commented asking for a second part to this. It was only recently that I saw that part two was requested. To those who requested this, I am so sorry for making you wait this long! Mizu X Fem!Reader CW: Deep conversations about trauma and dark/intrusive thoughts WC: 1.0k+

"Hey, Mizu!" I smiled, waving to her.

"Hey, Y/N," she smiled.

"Tea again?"

"You know it," she said, pulling out her wallet.

"I got it," I said.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes, I am sure. I know you've been working hard."

She smiled, shaking her head, "I take it Ise told you?"

"Yes. And the social media posts of your recent tattoos lately."

"Business has been booming. I am grateful."

"I take it you're stressed, though."

"Very much am," she let out a sigh. "Oh, before I forget."

"Yeah?"

"You free tonight?"

"M-Me?"

"Yes, you," she chuckled.

"I-I," I found my friend and Ise were standing around the corner, vigorously nodding their heads. "I'm not doing anything tonight."

"Great. I'll meet you here, then?"

"Y-Yeah," I said, finishing up making her tea.

"See you then," she smiled, taking the cup from my hand.

Our fingers brushed over one another's as she grabbed it, heading out of the little cafe. She waved to my friend and Ise before heading out. I stood there, my mouth wide open and my eyes blinked rapidly. My friend came over and hugged me from the side.

"Look at you! Wooing Mizu like that."

"I-I didn't do anything. I-I just treated her with kindness and respected her as a person."

"And those are qualities you don't find a lot these days," Ise said.

"Yes, I remember the story you told me."

"And also, from what I heard from my friend, Mizu is not the easiest person to like. And she struggles to find people to talk to," Ise said.

"I can see why," I said.

"But this is good!" my friend said. "I know how much you've been wanting to date someone."

"I-I'm not sure I want to date Mizu. I mean, she seems nice and all and I do find her attractive, but I-I don't know."

"Just let things happen, Y/N," my friend said. "You don't have to force yourself to like someone if you don't feel like you do."

"Thanks," I said.

"We should also probably get back to work," my friend eyed the line that was starting to gather behind us.

"Oh shit," I said and turned towards the register as my friend and Ise were getting things prepared.

After we closed the cafe, I was walking out right when Mizu was walking towards the building.

"We'll see you later, Y/N," Ise and my friend said.

"Later," I said to them before turning to Mizu.

"H-Hey, Mizu."

"Hey, Y/N," she smiled. "You ready?"

"Where are we going to go?"

"I found an awesome place to show you," she said and walked off towards the outskirts of the city.

We got onto a train that led to the outer parts, where not many people lived and it would be a long hike to reach the next town over. The train stopped and Mizu got up. I followed her off the train and into the woods. The sun was starting to set and it was getting chilly. My work uniform wasn't enough to keep me warm, since I was wearing a short sleeve shirt and jeans.

"Here," Mizu said and wrapped her jacket around me.

"Thank you," I said. "W-What is here? And how did you find this place?"

"I remember a friend of mine, Ringo, told me about this place. How it's mostly woods and it's far enough from the city to where I won't get lost, but also far from the next town over. I came here one evening and started wandering around, trying to find a calm and quiet spot. Then I stumbled upon this," she pulled back some foliage and there was a large cliff ahead of us.

I stepped out of the woods and she followed behind me. I noticed she was wearing a white tank top and shorts with tennis shoes.

"How are you not cold?" I asked.

She chuckled, "The tattoo shop I work in is either freezing or boiling hot. The HVAC needs to be repaired and we're struggling right now to get it fixed. I've been working a lot more hours so that I can use what I get to help pay for the repairs. Don't worry, it's not just me who is doing that. Everyone is chipping in."

"I was gonna say," I said.

"It's the only place I will be a good person to, along with you, Ise, and your friend at the cafe."

"I don't blame you," I said.

"Come, let's sit."

We walked towards the edge of the cliff and sat down, our legs swinging in the air.

"After everything you've been through, I don't blame you for not being nice to those who aren't deserving of it."

"I should be nicer to people. They're just trying to get by and here I am, traumatized from my past."

"The healing process is a long and perilous journey."

"It truly is. I-I don't think I will ever heal."

"I know people say time heals all wounds."

"It's bullshit."

"Time heals the physical wounds, not the mental ones."

Mizu turned towards me, a look of shock on her face.

"What?" I asked.

"I always say the same thing, too."

"Well it's true. If you've been traumatized, no matter how much it hurt you, you can't easily get over that within a week. Or even a year. Hell, not even two years. Your body may be able to heal itself, but the brain and heart can't."

Mizu slowly nodded her head, "E-Exactly."

"I-I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't want this to sound like a therapy session."

"You know, no one understands any of that like you do."

"Really?"

"Yeah. A few people I have talked to have never made me feel safe. Safe in the sense of I can express my thoughts and feelings freely."

"Your thoughts and feelings are valid, Mizu," I said. "No matter what anyone says, they're valid."

"Even the dark thoughts?"

"That's a gray area. But if you don't enact on them, either if they're dark towards yourself or someone else, they're still valid to have."

"Why do you say that?"

"They're your thoughts and feelings. So they should be valid to at least you. I think it's important that they're mainly valid to you, but I do feel you need validation from others on what you're thinking. And I think everything you think, dark, light, whatever it may be, is valid. Unless you enact on the dark thoughts."

"Don't let the intrusive thoughts win," Mizu chuckled.

I chuckled with her as well, "Yeah. Don't let the intrusive thoughts win. But they're still valid."

"Thank you, Y/N," Mizu said.

"You're welcome, Mizu. And this is a great sight. Thank you for bringing me here."

"You're welcome. Want to do something like this again sometime?"

I turned and smiled at her, "I'd love to."

#mizu x reader #bes mizu #mizu blue eye samurai #mizu #blue eye samurai

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queendomkey · 2 days

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Well, we've finally reached it. The song that made me first start crying on my initial TTPD listen.

There's so much to this song, so much about how we use up and discard the women who make culture. Clara Bow is about the women who get held up as touchstones posthumously / very late into their careers. Swift has stated that she pulled from actual examples used about her, but I can think of so many more that could've been pulled in board rooms.

You look like Gwen Stefani, you look like Brittney Spears, you look like a Spice Girl. I can think of so, so many examples, beyond the ones who are listed in Clara Bow. We, as in the public consciousness, forget the women who shaped the imagery we love. Billie Holiday shaped jazz and pop, Anna May Wong as a pivotal film actress in Hollywood's earliest days, and Sister Rosetta Tharpe for rock and roll. For a very long time, any plus size woman trying to get into music was compared to Adele, and now it's Lizzo.

Young women, especially those in the media industry, are constantly, constantly inundated with women we are supposed to be like, but not entirely. We're supposed to be the better version of them, damned with faint praise. A line that has, in hindsight, stuck out to me was "You look like Stevie Nicks in '75, the hair and lips," because... Why '75?

Obviously, part of it is for the rhyme scheme. But the song is told entirely in quotes, something someone said. Swift looks like Stevie Nicks in '75, because she looks like Stevie when she was young, when she was "new," when she was dazzling.

That's not to say that Stevie Nicks isn't a powerhouse now. She still performs, still writes. She performed this year! In 2024! And yet, she will forever be frozen in '75, when she was with Fleetwood Mac and was releasing their self-titled album, in the throes of writing Rumorus. ( side note: please read the history of Rumours writing process. )

It's an endless cycle: women's ideas are taken, consumed by the public, and when only the bones remain, they're used to compare.

"Promise to be dazzling" is the ending line of the chorus - and it's both a beautiful, poignant reminder that the women listed in the song have captured audience's hearts and minds, and a threat. Promise us that you'll be dazzling, you'll forever be sixteen, forever hold up these ideals and stay the exact same.

I think Swift said it best herself, "There's this thing people say about celebrities, that they're frozen at the age they got famous." The demand is: promise to remain the newest thing, and we will always love you.

The truth is that, well, it's not possible. The promise is designed to not be kept. When public opinion turns on these women, it's to detract from their legacy of art.

Getting older is not a curse, it's a gift. We have so many public figures who didn't get that gift, who are frozen at 18, at 22, at 27. And yet, the societal demand is that women stay young, women can only be beautiful, can only be successful if they are young.

A couple of other songwriting notes.

"Did you know you'd be picked, like a rose?" Another question from imaginary men in meetings; did you know, you would be picked to be the new great thing? Did you know, that you too will begin to wilt under the pressure?

I love the repeats of "I'm not trying to exaggerate, but I think I might die if it happened to me / I might die if I made it." Because it relates back to that idea of how caustic fame is. How everyone around the Narrator (very much Swift, in this case) can see how she's being affected by it, and are indirectly praising her for being so strong. Neverminding that this entire album is a statement, a saying of "fame has drained me so, please let me off this pedestal."

But, didn't you know? "[You're] flesh and blood amongst war machines / You're the new god we're worshiping."

That final verse - You look like Taylor Swift, in this light, we're loving it. You've got edge, she never did. The future's bright, dazzling. Her delivery of the lines is soft, but the intent is clear. It doesn't actually matter who the imaginary board director is addressing - it doesn't matter which of the new generation of pop artists look, sound, act, are like Taylor Swift.

What matters, I think, is the warning. Don't let them do this to you. Do not let them tell you that youth is all you have, do not let them make you follow the mold of women before you, that you may only ever be bejeweled right now.

The future, too, is dazzling.

#ttpdminutes #the cassandra speaks #Clara Bow ttpd #Clara Bow TS #taylor swift

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wesleysniperking · 2 days

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Usopp and Conqueror’s Haki | part 1 (TL;DR)

Read this if have you any doubts. True Usopp fans only.

This is probably one of my MOST favorite topics to just think about and mull over. For the past couple of days, I’ve just been spouting streams of consciousness it seems, but I’m really wanting to showcase what there is to like and truly appreciate about Usopp.

So, this whole discussion on him having Conqueror’s haki just gets my neurons goin’ baby. Meaning it makes me really happy and theoretical and the like.

As long as I’ve been in this fandom I’ve come across all these theories and speculations surrounding Usopp. And guess what? They never stop. And they don’t seem to be slowing down anytime soon. The Final Saga is here and OP fans are getting anxious and bold. Behind all the scrutiny and petty hate, the real question everyone is asking is, “What will Usopp do next?”

Anywho, every time the convo gets to Conqueror’s haki Usopp gets name-dropped. I never entertained what people would consider bullsh*t. But every time I’d look into Usopp theories and speculation, Conqueror’s Haki was at the forefront. But then when I started frequenting websites such as Worstgen, Reddit, YouTube, etc. Conqueror’s haki kept being brought up and Usopp was in that same sentence. Even the haters with all their doubts think Usopp shows the most potential when compared to other characters people speculate on (no shade to them at all, whatsoever). So, after that sh*t started being shoved in my face, I decided to look into all these theories and speculation arising when it came to Usopp and Conqueror’s Haki, AND despite being skeptical and straddling the fence, I mean, the guy has potential.

First, I’m just gonna say this, when people start talking about how he’s gonna use it and when he’s gonna use it, they come up with all these scenarios that got me thinking they are cooking up something quite tasty.

Like, a multitude of a multi-page thesis.

One scenario that stands out to me is that there will be a moment where Usopp finds himself amid battle and unfortunately he once (again) gets the overpowered baddie whom the monster trio can’t defeat. So per usual, Usopp runs, hides, lies, makes a few seemingly tactless shots with Kabuto, and grovels (maybe), and then he starts getting beaten to a pulp. Like he starts getting the sh*t beat out of him. Then the baddie leaves him or more clearly the baddie starts walking off while giving a diatribe about Usopp being a worthless piece of sh*t and deadweight, throwing Usopp’s insecurities back into his face. So, Usopp gets back up and tries again (bleeding and tired), and some way and somehow (due to desperation and sheer will) he unleashes conqueror’s haki and it’s game over for the big baddie. But it depends if the true fight gets started then (Usopp’s Kabuto raised and ready) or the baddie just ends up on the ground, stomped. The end. This also clarifies that when people imagine Usopp with Conqueror's Haki, this isn't something he's trained for; so it's very sloppy and new to him. He won't know he's used it. It's a one-time, big moment thing, and then whatever else happens from there we run with.

But let’s get back to the ground. That’s daydream-ville. I gotta come back to earth. Needless to say, there are some supposed and still growing/adding conqueror’s haki traits that are/include:

The ability to force their will onto others/a strong will

This one is very complex, somewhat, when it comes to Usopp. But it’s also where it’s the most interesting. From the jump, the Going Merry crosses my mind. Ship developed a Klabautermann because of Usopp’s wholehearted care. That was one of the MAJOR (if not only) reasons why she came to save the Straw Hats during the buster call. So, he was basically the captain of the GOING MERRY (not the SHs, he lets Luffy have that with no qualms—and never did have any).

Then let’s not forget Usopp’s iconic speech when Luffy needed to get his a** up and finish Lucci off. Many people claim that—when discussing how far the crew could’ve gone without Usopp—this is where the deal-breaker comes in. If Usopp hadn’t been there to give Luffy that speech, Luffy would’ve been cat food.

Then there’s Usopp lies coming true. Call it a coincidence or irrelevant, there is indeed proof. If you’re an Usopp fan, you know you know.

Heck, he’s even lied about having conqueror’s two times (was it two or three?), and everyone knows that his lies come true. Even haters (to a point) or non-fans actually can consider this. Like, bro lies about having conqueror’s haki two times and it’s bound to come true.

continue here

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