#hooooly shit i finished it
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Diluc Ragnvindr x Reader- Replaced (hurt/comfort??)
You quickly found your abilities became obsolete when Lumine arrived in Mondstadt. Feeling hopeless, you run away, only to be caught by a certain red haired wine tycoon.
(A/n: Ohhhhh my god i actually finished this thing. i started it while i was having a breakdown and finished it yesterday. im actually rlly proud of it lol)
I tried to keep this one as gn as possible and i think i did good. reader has a vision and is in the Knights, id say theyre around as high in the ranks as amber if that makes sense lol.
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You had worked hard for years to rise to your position in the Knights of Favonius. Although you weren't as high up in the ranks as people like Kaeya or Jean, you pulled your weight and always got the job done. You wielded your weapon with confidence and always did your best to help protect the people of Mondstadt. This had taken you some time, but your efforts had clearly paid off. You were a highly respected and valued member of the Knights of Favonius.
So how come Lumine had barely been in Mondstadt for two weeks and had already risen to your level in the ranks?
No, she wasn't just at your level of hard earned respect- she had surpassed it. Everyone was talking about her. She just showed up in Mondstadt and became a knight (even though it was honorary), a process that everyone else had to work at for years before successfully completing and earning their titles.
You watched as your fellow knights and citizens of the City of Freedom grew to quickly adore her and completely forget about all of the effort you had put in.
You weren't an idiot. You had never been on her level. You weren't all powerful, and you weren't a perfect fighter. You certainly had no reason to be famous. But Lumine was the only person anyone in the Knights was talking about, praising her for deeds like defeating abyss mages and wiping out hilichurl camps, all things you had done many times in the past and hadn't received as much praise as her for accomplishing.
Then, she truly began to replace you. Jean gave tasks normally assigned to you to her, telling you to go home early for the day or go help out with busywork. Usually on the rare occasion you had nothing to do for the day, you would accompany Kaeya on missions, but of course he was busy with her as well.
And soon, so was Diluc.
You and Diluc had been friends for several years at that point. Although he was normally serious and straightforward, this part of him would crack a little around you. In the last year or two, however, you had found yourself falling for the man.
How could you not? He was dedicated to protecting Mondstadt. He was disciplined and successful, despite all of the hardship he had endured in his late teens with his father and brother. He was caring. And not to mention absolutely gorgeous. But you had always thought he was a bit out of your league, and that he deserved someone on his level.
Like Lumine.
You saw how close they had gotten, how his identity as the Darknight Hero was revealed to her so quickly, while it had taken years for him to tell you about that part of him- and he had only told you about it because you had caught him putting on his mask as he left the tavern one night. You thought you had come to accept that there was no way he'd love you back, but seeing them get so close stirred feelings within you you thought you had gotten rid of.
For a while, you did nothing, trying to be happy for the girl working so hard to protect the city. As every day passed of going into work and being promptly told you weren't needed, you began to feel worse and worse, growing more and more hopeless with every mention of her name.
All of your insecurities came to a climax during the final fight against Stormterror. When you realized something was going on, you rushed to the Knights of Favonius's headquarters for a briefing. When you asked Jean how you could help, clutching your weapon, declaring you could and would help fight Dvalin, she said you could just stay in Mondstadt and help make sure nothing happened to the citizens.
This was the final straw. A part of you felt selfish, knowing how important it was that the city was protected by capable fighters, but part of you was hurt. Normally you would have gone along to fight a massive threat, but this time you were simply left to hold down the fort.
And when it was all over, when Stormterror was defeated and the city was safe, Lumine was hailed as a hero. You weren't surprised at that point, she had done everything recently, of course she would defeat one of the Four Winds.
You had enough. The night after the battle, as the city was filled with a mixture of celebration and festivity at the quelled threat, and solemn rebuilding of broken homes and businesses, you took the opportunity to leave unnoticed. You wrote a note saying you were quitting the knights and not coming back into the city for a while and left it on Jean's desk. You packed up some of your belongings into a bag- just some clothes, rations, and first aid supplies- and left the city.
You spent a while wandering the continent, venturing into Liyue, seeing pieces of nature you hadn't expected to see so soon in your life and fighting enemies tougher than ones you had fought before. After a while, you decided to wander closer to Mondstadt for a little bit, never going close to the city itself and avoiding the knights whenever you heard they would be near. You continued to fulfill your oath of protecting people, defeating enemy after enemy that threatened innocents. You fought regisvines, mercenaries and treasure hoarders, and even a hypostasis and emerged victorious from each fight, albeit with some relatively minor injuries. Perhaps some sad part of you still wanted to prove yourself. You grew exponentially during this time, and you didn't even know how long you had been gone- was it one month? Two? It didn't matter. It seemed doubtful that anyone had even noticed you were gone.
You were wandering through the woods a little ways away from Springvale one night when you heard two children crying out for help. Running to the source of the sound, you discovered two children being targeted by two abyss mages and some hilichurls. You saw one of the abyss mages charging a blast of fire to shoot at the kids, and without thinking, you placed yourself in front of the children, taking most of the blast. You charged at the monsters, quickly taking out the hilichurls with a few hits and moving on to the mages. As you told the children to run back into Springvale, a figure appeared behind you. A male voice that sounded fairly familiar called out to you.
"Those are abyss mages! They're much more dangerous than hilichurls! You stay with the kids!"
You didn't even turn to face the figure as you responded.
"I know what they are, I've beat way worse! I'll handle this! I'm more than capable of beating a few abyss mages!" You shouted, grunting as you defeated the first mage. A few minutes later you slayed the other one as well. You turned and rushed over to the kids, checking them for any injuries. When you looked up at the mysterious figure, you were horrified to realize you knew who it was.
It was the Darknight Hero, also known as Diluc Ragnvindr.
"Y/N! Where have you been, everyone's been worried about you! Didn't you realize disappearing like that would have everyone worried sick?!"
You felt a pang of guilt at his words. Maybe people really did miss you… but if they truly cared, they wouldn't have replaced you. They wouldn't have thrown you away, you thought.
"Listen, Dilu- I mean, Darknight Hero. I wasn't needed anymore, so I left. It doesn't matter. And anyways, that's not our priority right now. We should make sure these kids get back into Springvale safely."
He grunted. "Alright. I'll go with you into Springvale, but once we drop off these two we need to have a serious discussion about some things."
You and Diluc walked the kids back into Springvale, telling their parents about what had happened and making sure they got into their homes safely. As you two walked out of the town, it almost felt like the air itself was suffocating you. You considered just running away, but that probably wouldn't help much. He could catch up with you.
What did he think about you now? He probably hated you for running away. He had probably completely replaced you with Lumine by now. They were probably dating.
After what felt like an eternity of walking through the woods, you and Diluc made it to the Windrise tree. As you gazed up at the tree, Diluc broke the silence.
"So where have you been all this time?"
"I walked to Liyue. I travelled through there for a while but wanted to stop near home for a little bit. I plan on seeing the rest of Liyue, going through the Chasm, and then going to Sumeru later this month."
"Why exactly did you have to leave so suddenly? You never told me you were planning to visit Liyue. I would've said goodbye to you before you left."
As he said that, he turned his gaze towards the sky. He looked… regretful?
"I wasn't planning on it."
"So you just randomly decided to travel to another nation one night?"
"Not exactly."
He suddenly turned towards you and looked straight into your eyes.
"So why did you leave, y/n? Did someone tell you to leave? Were you threatened? What aren't you telling me?!?"
As he spoke, he started to sound more frenzied. Although seeing his tough facade fade sometimes was nice to watch, this was scary. You started to feel guilty for leaving without telling him.
"Diluc, nobody threatened me. I left because Mondstadt and the Knights don't need me. They found someone better and I got tired of feeling useless every day." You shifted and looked towards the ground. "I've done more while traveling this last month or two than I have in so long. Since Lumine got here I haven't had an opportunity to use my weapon, but I've gotten to fight so many more things and help so many more people than I did back in Mondstadt during the Stormterror crisis. And I doubt anyone truly missed me. If they said they did, they probably just said it out of courtesy. I'm sure they'll all be fine, they have Lumine now." As you mentioned her name, you felt spite run through your veins. "She can clearly do so much more than I ever could."
You lifted your head to look at Diluc. He had a look of shock on his face, and didn't say anything for a second. Then he finally spoke.
"So you're saying you left because you were jealous of the Traveler?"
Your tone changed to something angrier, sharper.
"Yeah, I guess you could say that."
Diluc sighed. "I'm sorry that they all made you feel that way. But rest assured, nobody meant to replace you. I'm sure they didn't realize what they were doing. You could never be replaced, y/n-"
"How could you POSSIBLY say that I could never be replaced when you replaced me too!"
You didn't even realize you were shouting at Diluc.
"What are you talking about, y/n? I could never replace you! You are a wonderful person, why would I ever want someone else in my life?"
"You did replace me, Diluc! Just like everyone else did! You completely stopped visiting me when she got here! Whenever I tried to find you, you were with her! You abandoned me for her!"
At this point, you were starting to cry as you yelled at him. "And I can't even be angry at her because you deserve someone like her! You deserve someone so much better than me! She's perfect- she's beautiful, and so strong, and has accomplished so much, and everyone loves her, and look at me! I'm never going to compare to her! It's no wonder you're in love with her…"
Although you said the last part of your rant under your breath, he still heard what you said.
"Y/n. Please. Look at me."
You looked at him.
"I am afraid I must apologize to you. I am so, so sorry for how I've treated you recently, and I'm so sorry it took all this for me to realize my mistakes. I promise you, I never meant to replace you with Lumine. The truth is, I've been busy recently with her because we've been investigating the Abyss Order. The Abyss Order manipulated Dvalin into attacking the city, and I was busy trying to get to the bottom of the situation without worrying the citizens of Mondstadt. I should've tried to make time for you, and I know sorry probably isn't enough, but I'm afraid it's all I have to give at this moment."
Suddenly, it all made sense. You should've figured he'd be trying to help with the Stormterror threat. And of course she would be able to help with that. You felt some of the jealousy fade away, but some of it still clung on to your heart, a weight waiting to be lifted.
"And another thing."
He looked away from you, glancing at the ground.
"Your notion that I am in love with Lumine is incorrect. Although I now consider her a good friend, the feelings I hold towards her and you are different. You mean much more to me than she ever has. The entire time we were out chasing after the Abyss, you were all I could think about, and when you disappeared I was terrified for you. So please trust me when I say she is not the one I love, but you are."
You were in disbelief. Did Diluc really just say he felt the same way towards you?
"Wait, Diluc. Did you just- are you saying that you have feelings for me?"
Although his head was turned away from you, you could see a blush spread across his face.
"Yes, that…is what I'm trying to say. I've grown to love you in the time we've spent together. I tried to ignore it for the sake of our friendship but as more and more time has passed it has become increasingly difficult to ignore. If this damages our relationship so be it. You deserve to know the truth."
Stunned, your mind went blank of a reply for a moment. You took a deep breath before replying.
"Diluc, I… I love you too. I'm so, so sorry I left without telling you, and I'm so sorry I was jealous of you and Lumine, and I'm so sorry for making you worry about me, and I love you so much, I- I-"
At this point you were crying and couldn't form a proper sentence. You looked down, hiding your head in your hands, too embarrassed to look at Diluc. He wrapped his arms around you and put one hand on the back of your head, pulling you into a warm embrace. Although he was generally standoffish, you had to admit he was a great hugger. You sobbed in his arms for a while, letting out months worth of stress. You kept babbling little "I'm sorrys" and other incoherent apologies, but he kept his arms around you the whole time, comforting you and assuring you that it was okay and he loved you. After a while you stopped crying, and at that point the sun was beginning to rise. You and Diluc stood under the great Windrise Tree and watched the sun slowly rise among the cloudscape.
"If you want to keep traveling I won't stop you, but I think you should stop by the Knight's headquarters and tell Jean and Kaeya that you're okay. They've all been worried about you."
"Yeah, you're right, I probably should. But I wanna stay with you for now…" you said as you leaned into him once again. You suddenly let out a loud yawn, realizing how tired you were from a night of fighting and crying. Diluc also noticed your sleepiness.
"Do you want to go back to the winery with me to get some sleep?"
"Yes. That would be absolutely wonderful. I'm exhausted."
"Then let's go."
You and Diluc walked back to the Dawn Winery in the light of the early morning sun, holding hands and talking about everything that had happened while you were apart. When you got back to the winery, you slept through much of the day in your lover's arms, and spent the rest of it making up for lost time, telling stories of your adventures and eating food Adelinde brought you.
It felt like a burden had been lifted off of you, and you could finally enjoy days of peace with Diluc without standing in the shadow of another person.
Bonus:
The next day, Diluc took you to the Knights of Favonius's headquarters. Everyone was surprised, but pleased at your return. Diluc explained why you had left to your superiors, and they rushed to apologize to you.
It turned out that right after you left for Liyue, so did Lumine as she sought the Geo Archon. And with two of their best workers gone, the Knights were barely coping with rebuilding the city from Stormterror's damages.
You could tell they were truly remorseful for how they had treated you the last few months, with even the normally aloof Kaeya looking grim as the situation was explained to him.
It also turned out that you weren't the only one fed up with their actions after Lumine's arrival. Many other knights felt like they had been cast aside after the Traveler's arrival. You were just the only one to leave.
You weren't sure if you could forgive them just yet, and you knew you wanted to travel some more before officially returning to the knights.
But now you knew how truly important you were to your friends in the Knights, and you had a loving boyfriend to boot. Overall, things were finally starting to look up for you, and you knew that no matter how far you traveled from your homeland, you would have people waiting for you when you got home.
Finding the one you loved had truly led to the ending you deserved.
#hooooly shit i finished it#diluc x reader#genshin x reader#genshin imagines#genshin impact x reader#diluc x y/n#diluc ragnivindr x reader#genshin x y/n#gender neutral reader#hurt/comfort#slight angst#diluc ragnvindr#genshin diluc
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drunken haze (of memories)
[stationary version below the cut]
#hooooly shit#aventurine is my roman empire#this piece was like… at least 15 hours?#and after i finished i just went back to drawing him again#there’s sneaky little references to his backstory if you look for them :)#honkai star rail#hsr aventurine#aventurine honkai star rail#honkai star rail fanart#lix art
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i hope the team working on the dragon prince knows that they gave me a FUCKING HEART ATTACK WITH THAT EARLY RELEASE
#the dragon prince#i finished it today and god there SO MUCH to unpack#imma rewatch it to really digest everything#goddd#thus season was so dark#like the nightmare sequences?#hooooly shit#I THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE TIME TO PREPARE MYSELF BUT NUH UH
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as i begin working on it, i need to like. stress again. you guys are not fucking ready for the prompt lian sent in at all
#ell shut up#when i woke up and read through it i was just. holy shit. hooooly fucking shit#shaking my head. my god#btw i did finish another fic! but im stockpiling that one for next week! i want to finish one more too :D#then i can schedule them for when i am overseas!
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Ineed to lie down and process that but also I need to watch a hundred analysis videos about this right now
#solis.txt#just finished watching rgu. HEY? HEY? HEY? H#hoooly shit. hoolyshit. hooooly shit.#I CAN LOOK IN THE TAG WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT SPOILERS NOW YAY
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God damn. I'm in constant awe of just how incredible the Chainsaw Man anime adaptation has been. I already saw the manga as a 10/10, and this anime is somehow making me love this cast and this story more and more with every episode.
#i just finished the latest ep with katana man and hooooly shit#won't spoil anything!#chainsaw man#csm
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what is up tspin nation!!!
#sillywacky#scientific sillies#im not putting oc tags on this sorry#WARNING FOR. LONG RAMBLE IN TAGS#guess who JUST started hir entry an hour ago. over 40 hours after the challenge was announced#and i had multiple hours to start. and i just didnt because my brain didnt want to yet#it is five in the morning. i got the script done at least and its gonna be fun to draw. but Hooooly shit#i have GOT to start working on entries earlier!!!!#duality of denver. challenge 1 gets announced and i start immediately. finish entire entry (with many distractions) within 12 hours#or. alternatively. challenge 2 gets announced. i wait 40 hours before even starting. and draw on whiteboard with friends instead during tha#ILL BE OK DW. IVE BEEN SLEEPING. just not at normal times#and im more excited to draw so now that i have the script done it will be smooth sailing#However. I must sleep soon. im going to be working on this entry all day today when i wake up. but its gonna be fun
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Other people get to read about feudal conflicts! Me? I get to participate in it directly! How you ask? Well all you have to do is be a member of tHE FUCKING KINK COMMUNITY--
#this is simultaneously a joke and the most serious I have ever been#I wouldn't trade it for anything but hooooly shit do the big events sure feel like fucking clan meetups#Where the perception of the barest slight will result in yet another feud that will last far longer than reason would suggest#I count the hours until we are finished#One day I'll document all the stupid drama#Know that any big kink conference you go to is run by people who are either gritting their teeth to get through it#Or ready to stab each other in the back
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just finished Ad Astra by Hellenite on ao3, and holy shit that was fucking amazing
#the cat rambles#best damn fic ive ever read#i was listening to the rain formerly known as purple on loop while reading#and as i finished the fic the song ended and hooooly shit that was a religous experience#read ad astra now#i am not asking
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✿ BITE ME
°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•
↳ matt sturniolo x fem reader
↳ words - 2485
↳ summary - you and matt have hated each other for so long, until you see him at a party and suddenly you two don’t hate each other.
↳ contains - smut, sex, drinking, degrading, oral, orgasm, hair pulling, swearing, biting, praise, cream pie, breeding kink, cum eating, idk what to put 😭
↳ song - meddle about by chase atlantic
°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•
°:. *₊ ° . ☆
im in the campus gym watching the team play basketball, something i enjoy and it gives me time to finish up my work for classes. unfortunately, matt’s in the team, i ignore him the best i can. for as long as i can remember me and matt just have it out for eachother but honestly watching him all sweaty in that jersey, flexing his muscle… hot.
my heads down trying to focus on my work until a thud hits my shoulder, i shoot my head up and see matt in front of me. “are you going to just sit there all stupid or give me back the ball?” he snaps as he waits for me to respond, “shut up” i scoff back at him as i pick up the ball and throw it back to him.
“hey i’m not the one acting all dumb, flaunting here looking for attention” his brows narrow as he quickly throws the ball back to his teammates. “god. fuck you matt. fuck you.” i mumble under my breath as i start getting my things, matt walking back to the court as i storm out of the gym.
as much as i think he’s hot, he’s still an asshole. the littlest things he does and i start boiling over.
i get to my dorm room and drop my work on the floor as i flop onto my bed and groan into my pillow. i lift up my head as i check the time on my phone, it’s four. my best friend, nick (also matt’s brother) is taking me to a halloween party later, he says to need to ‘get back out there’ he says i’m lonely, i think i’m just fine.
i take a quick nap, finish my work, make a snack and finally start getting ready for the party. i pick out one of my favorite baby tees, black with white letters that spell out ‘bite me’, and a cute black denim mini skirt that barley hides my ass while the shirt hugs my figure too. i sit down at my desk to do my makeup, some mascara, eyeliner, highlights, and my favorite lipgloss.
i get a buzz on my phone from nick, he’s at the party, asking if i’m ready. i text back that i’ll be there soon. i quickly mess with my hair but figure it’s fine down, i grab some random cat ears and do whiskers with my eyeliner as a ‘costume’. i grab my bag and head out the door.
i get to the party and walk in, i see nick across the room and a smile floods my face, i run up to him, meeting him in a hug. “y/n!! oh my god finally.” he eyes he up and down, “wow, good costume,” i roll my eyes and laugh as i see his, creamish sweater with blood stains, “whatever, who are you?”
“stu, ghost face, obviously,” he smiles as he spins around, showing off his outfit. as we go to the kitchen, getting drinks as he complains about having to wait here without me, all these bitchy college kids.
we drink and laugh as we dance, taking up the whole floor. after a while i tell him i’m going to get another drink, even though it feels like i’ve already had fifty. i make my way to the kitchen and as i’m about to fill up my cup i feel someone behind me, matt, his hands grab onto the table, pinning me between him and the table. i turn around and roll my eyes as i realize it’s him.
“fuck are you doing?” he stares down at me, eyeing down my whole body. i eye him too, still hot, and i see he has in those fake vampire teeth. god would i love to feel his teeth sink into me. “nothing… i’ve been looking at you, that outfit,” he whispers as he moves his lips to my ear “dressed like such a slut.” my eyes widen, hooooly shit, maybe i’m drunk maybe he’s just extra hot right now, but damn.
“you drunk?” i giggle trying to push down my thoughts of him.. oh the things he could do to me, but no, he’s an asshole.
he laughs, his eyes never breaking eye contact, his hands travel to my waist pushing me more into the table behind me. one of his hands leave my waist and moves to tug on my shirt, “bite me? oh i bet i could,” he smirks as he bites down a little to show off the fake vampire teeth.
he pushes his hips into me, his bulge hitting me, “cmon baby, you know you want this.. i’ve seen that way you look at me and shit i cant say i haven’t thought of this.. i’ve dreamed of it…” one of his hands move to tuck some of my hair behind my ear, my lips part, he’s never been like this and god i’m dying for it. i stay still and quiet looking up at him, just shocked. he’s thought of this? baby? oh my god.
“say it, you want this” he whispers so quiet i can barley hear from all the noise in the background. i stay quiet again, my mind is fucking blown. “don’t be shy now.. look at that outfit, youre not shy…” i open my mouth slightly, about to speak but instead i just nod, his smirk grows wide as he takes my hand, leading me to the bathroom, locking the door behind us then setting me on the counter of the sink, his hands resting on my waist.
“matt-“ im finally about to try and speak but he cuts me off, “shhh baby, you’ve been teasing me all night, i cant hate you like this,” he smiles as his fingers trail from my waist to my thighs, circling his fingers on my skin.
he leans his head closer before taking out the vampire teeth and moving his mouth to my neck, kissing and marking me, i let out a slight gasp as he captures my skin between his teeth, slightly biting and giggling as i make small noises. “mmm,” he pulls away to admire the marks he made from my neck to my collarbones, he smiles and moves his hand to my cheek, “so pretty baby,” all i can do is look at him, those eyes, his hair, his hands, and i can’t stop to think about what he’ll do to me next…
he kneels down and he starts to pull down my skirt, smirking up at me as he throws it to the side, leaning down to kiss around my thighs, i bite my lip gently. his hands rest at the top of my underwear, teasing me.
“matt, please..” i say softly, he chuckles as he pulls down my panties, throwing them aside too. he looks at my eyes, wanting to see my every reaction. he moves his finger to land right on my clit, aching for his touch.
“mph.. pleeeease..” i look down at his finger on me, waiting for him to move it. his smirk grows seeing how desperate i am, “learn to be patient baby,”
he puts his hands on my waist again and pulls me forward off the counter, i look a little confused as i stand in front of him, looking up at him, “don’t worry, just. be. patient.” his hands on my waist move off and one on the back of my head, gripping onto my hair, i whine a little as his hand pulls my head up to look at him more, “beautiful,” he smiles as he leans his head down, sealing our lips together.
“mm.. get down,” he says firmly as he moves away from the kiss, i feel his hand pushing me down a little, to get me on my knees. i kneel down in front of him and his grip loosens on my head, “good girl,” he leans down a little whispering in my ear then moving back up, staring down at me.
he moves his hand to my cheek, his thumb to my lips as he parts them, “oh baby..” he takes his hand off my face, “well?” he tilts his head a little and i stop looking at him, my hands move onto the top of his pants, undoing the belt, im nervous but at the same time… ive been waiting for this, for so fucking long. i put his belt to the side and my hands shake a little, before taking his pants off i wait a little and look up at him, my heart racing. i hear him laugh a little as he stares down at me, “no ones stopping you,”
i look back down, and grip onto the top of his pants, pulling them down as he steps out of them, his hand moving back to the top of my head. the perfect outline of his rock hard dick, a wet spot on his boxers at the tip, i need him to throat fuck me, my hands rest at the top of his boxers, as i just look. fuck. “its rude to stare,” he says softly, smirking down at me still.
i pull down his boxers as his dick springs out, hitting the side of my face. i feel matts grip on my hair tighten slightly. precum leaking out his red tip, his other hand grips his dick and moves it to caress my lips.
“open up baby,” i part my lips, sticking out my tongue a bit as he rubs it on my tongue, i stare up at him as he keeps his eyes on my mouth. he slides it inside, my lips wrapping around it as he moves both his hands to my head, gripping my hair tightly and pushing my head forward, his tip reaching the back of my throat as i look up and him, his eyes shut and head leaning up, “fuck baby.. youre amazing,”
he speeds up, fucking my throat good as i start gagging. his hands holding me down at the base, spit drips out as i try to not gag as his hips buck at my mouth as he finishes, releasing my head and pulling out of my mouth. i spit out his cum mixed with my spit, catching my breath as i lean my head against the cabinets below the sink.
“fuck..” i gasp, as he kneels down in front of me, both of us sitting as he puts his hand on my cheek, my eyes opening to look at him as i pant. his hand moves to wipe off some spit by my lip, “you did so good.. cant wait to find out what else youre good at,” he smiles as he pulls me in kissing my mouth then standing back up again.
“get up.” my arms a little shaky, i use them to help me up off the floor as i stand in front of him. “turn around baby” i do, staring at the mirror, i feel his hands move to my ass, kneeding it as i look at myself, my makeup and ‘whiskers’ smudged. my hair all messed up and the cat ears unbalanced on my head.
his hands play with my ass then moving to my stomach his fingers moving down to my aching clit as he starts to circle around it, “fuck!” my head drops down as one of his hand reaches to my head, gripping my hair and forcing my head back up, “look or ill stop.” i force my eyes open as my knees buckle and i let out small whimpers, biting my lip trying to be quiet. “mm.. so wet for me baby..”
his head turns as he moves to my neck, kissing me as he circles my clit faster and faster. my teeth clench down as i keep forcing my eyes open as he continues to mark my neck even more.
“fuck, please matt..” i moan as i lean my arms to my elbows on the counter, his hand gripping my hair more as my body shakes and i let out a louder moan as i finish over his fingers.
he leans up from kissing me, taking his hand off me, he sticks those fingers up in front my face as his other hand still holds my head up, “cmon baby, see how you taste,” as i pant i stick out my tounge, his fingers moving to my mouth, sticking them in as i close my lips on his fingers.
he slides them out then giving my cheek small pats as he whispers in my ear, “good girl,” he then moves both his hands to my waist, making my head drop down. he pulls my hips toward him as his dick rubs against my ass.
before i know it he pushes inside me, making me gasp as he starts to thrust into me, grabbing at my hips, not even letting me get a second to adjust to him, “fuck! matt!” i moan as my eyes shut hard, my fingers gripping onto the counter. “mm.. you feel so good,”
he moves his hips faster and faster, slapping against me, “fuck, i’m close baby,” his fingers dig into my hips as i let out mindless moans. “you want me to cum inside you? hmm?” his breath hot against my skin as one of his hands move back to my head, gripping my hair again, “answer me.”
my head leans up as i try to nod my head, “yeah? you slut.” he drops my head again, thrusting into me as he finishes inside me, filling me up. he pulls out, his cum dripping out, “slut” he smirks again as his head leans to kiss my neck, “i’m starting to think you don’t hate me,” i smile as i breathe heavy.
“oh baby, i could never hate you…” he whispers, smiling on my skin as he hugs my waist. “mph.. m-matt..” i gag a little, dropping down onto the floor, carrying myself to the toilet as matt moves to lift up the seat then holding my hair as i throw up. “shit…” he laughs as i use the back of my hand to wipe off my mouth, closing the seat and flushing, “uh.. sorry,” i laugh a little as matt then kneels down next to me.
“you good?” i nod a little, “i think i am now…” we both turn our heads to each other as we start bursting out laughing on the bathroom floor, our clothes scattered around and both of us catching our breath still, “i’m.. im sorry i was a jerk to you…”
“i would’ve never thought i’d ever hear you apologize but.. i accept..” i smile, both of us still laughing as matt leans to me again, kissing me as he holds my face in his hands. “let’s get out of here?”
☆ °:. *₊ ° . °
taglist : @slutforchriss @mattsleftnipple03 @mattsdinosweater @ccolleenn @mixvchelle @leah-loves-lilies @sturn-wrld
#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo smut#matthew sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#sukiipjs#𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆#𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆
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finally some good fucking horror
#after a rash of watching disappointing movies & shows#I recently watched Pulse/Kairo and just finished ep.1 of Archive 81 and hooooly shit#this is what I was put on this earth for#yes I'm a bit of a sucker for vhs aesthetics#but that spine-tingling blood-freezing capital-E Eeriness? that takes so much fucking effort and skill to pull off#also god A81 is v clearly coming from a place of absolutely loving the genre and it shows!! vvv exciting#if I end up having to eat my words abt this I will literally cry I am so excited for where this goes#also I still have Thoughts on Pulse as well. but hm. another time
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a few people wanted the drabble of sitting on jjs face so here it is!
your boyfriend had been away on a pogue adventure all day leaving you alone in your shared apartment. needy for him but not having him here to help you release, you tried everything from your small hands (which couldn’t do the job, not like jj’s calloused and rough hands which gets you in all the right spots) to the little pink bullet vibrator jj keeps in a drawer when he plays with you(only climaxing when he has his dick buried deep inside of you holding the vibrator to your clit). none of it was doing what you really needed it to do like your jj so you text him. moving your panties to the side and taking a selfie of your painfully wet cunt you text him, “want you home jayj..” with an attachment.
jj’s phone pings in his back pocket, taking it out he sees a message from you“hooooly fuck..woah..uh guys there’s like a family emergency back home like—a car crash a terrible terrible crash so imma dip and we can “reconcile” this like tomorrow, yeah?” the pogues look at him with a disgusted face, and john b speaks up, “ew dude, we know it’s your girlfriend. you better come back tomorrow we have a lea—oh whatever.” he stops talking, seeing jj put on his helmet and get on his bike, starting the gear. about 10 minutes later jj bust through the door to see you in silk but slightly sheer pink, nightgown.
he basically pounces on you right then and there there. grabbing your head and kissing you deeply, exchanging saliva from the both of your tongues. jj pulls back “babycakes you can’t send me something like that and..wear something like this. it’s bad for my heart im telling ya.” you giggle at his deprivation, taking your hands and lifting your skirt up you show him your exposed cunt. “s’achey down there jayj.. need you to make me cum!” wet slick dripping down your thigh, jj almost throttles “oh jesus..you drive me fucking crazy.” he grabs you from the waist, hoisting you up on his shoulder and runs into your shared bedroom. making out with you he lays his head down on the pillow, grabbing you to straddle his chest. “get on top sweet girl, if y’re so needy you can ride my face.” you whimper at the suggestion and shake your head frantically. “jayj I cant do that! what if I suffocate you!” he rolls his eyes “baby the best way to die would honestly be in between-“ you cover his mouth with your hands preventing him from finishing the embarrassing sentence. “okay okay! ill do it.”
“atta girl.” you get closer to jj’s face, thighs hovering over him as you grip the headboard. “papa your face is gonna get messy!” he gets impatient with your excuses “that’s just fine sweet cheeks, but this not what mean-“ he grabs your thighs and pulls you down to mouth, mumbling “dis is what I meant.” you shiver at the contact, jj thrusts his tongue up into your cunt, slurping at your juices. “y’always taste so fuckin delicious baby..fuck.” he moves to your sensitive bud sucking knit gently and rolling it in his mouth “angh, jj your makin me feel s-so good, oh god!” he hooks his arm from under your thigh and starts rubbing your clit, sticking his tongue back into your pulsing hole. “go on princess, try to grind that sweet pussy on my tongue.” you grip the headboard, helping your balance to move your lower body forward and backwards in a slow pace. “mmmh it feels so good papa! oh your gonna make me cum!” you hear the squelches of your needy cunt and you clench around jj’s tongue. grinding yourself across his face to climax, your clit stroking on him. “f-fuck papa..s’good..” you mind going blank from the intense climax, you twitch and hover off jj’s face falling on his chest. jj sits up grabbing you by the shoulders to hug you, seeing the wet spot seethe through his pants. “well fuck babydoll..all your fussing made me cum too..shit.”
#jj x reader <3#obx smut#jj maybank x black!reader#jj mayback x reader#obx x reader#jj maybank#to make up for rafe punching him in my last fix <3 papa jj#rafe x reader <3#rafe cameron#rafe outer banks#rafe x black reader#rafe blurb
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HOOOOLY SHIT OKOK. I FINISHED IT BEFORE THE DEADLINE COULD KILL THRASH ME YAYYYAYYYYY
erm. hello!! hhihhi!! sorry if the intro is long i wanted it to be cool,,, I hope it was cool!!! Here's all the. relevant info!!
Name: Night Terror (Crescent Stardom is her legal name though)
Reference Image:
Notes on Personality: Night Terror, as she is actively reformed here, Is considerably less cruel than her old self. But still keeps very stand-offish to strangers and has a natural glare that tends to make people think she is still as aggressive as before. Be gentle with her and you might be able to catch a glimpse of her softer, more skittish personality that she moreso shows around family than anyone! She is also fairly quiet, so communication with her outside of little spurts or responses will take effort. She's just anxious, that's all!
Backstory and Lore: Separated from her Father; Meta Knight; soon after birth, Crescent Stardom was renamed Night Terror by the evil wizard Nightmare. He altered her form to be as monstrous as he'd made Meta Knight, and raised her to be the one to kill the lone swordsman. Her view on the world was heavily warped until Kirby shattered through it with sheer kindness for their long lost sister. To this day she is in active recovery with her refound family, struggling with concepts of morality and trying to build herself a new image... It's. A work in progress.
@kirbyoctournament
#kirby oc tournament#my art#kirby oc#night terror#kirby meta knight#I would have made this way more detailed#BUT I was made aware of this way too late#and still need to awnser asks!!!!#so erm#sorry gamers!!! i hope you like blue backgrounds#i also forgot my signature so please be nice#and dont steal my work!! pretty please dont
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Such Sharp Teeth
I needed to write a werewolf fic again, so many other writers i follow have been putting out bomb content so i had to join in <3
Writers notes: It's not true abo dynamics- some elements are featured but it doesn't follow truly, it is reader insert but MC's name is Aurora-
also go read @becauseicantthinkwritings Objects in Motion, hooooly shittt
Warnings: 18+themes, graphic descriptions of body transformation, insinuated non con elements, reader digression advised :)
All you could feel was the cool air on your skin, blowing through your hair as the moon glowed overhead. You felt strong, powerful. It was exhilarating and freeing all at once. The beauty of the forest surrounding you as the sharp ribbons of silver moonlight cut in shards through the trees.
You could taste the air, smell bread being baked from miles away, hear people talking and animals scurrying away from you. The forest floor rose up time and again to meet your feet, every sensation heightened. It was a beautiful thing more often than not, but tonight was different. Tonight there was a sense of desperation inside of you.
A tinge of fear, footfalls echoing behind you, they were far but yet still so close. Too close for comfort. Howls rang out and you knew that you'd never escape keeping pace like this. Your breath grew ragged, no longer deep inhalations but tortured puffs.
You could see your breath in the air before you and then you felt the pain surging through your body. Bones breaking, tissue tearing, muscles unraveling only to be knit back together in another form. You wanted to cry out at the pain but it’d only alert them to your location and that was far too dangerous.
You could taste blood and feel tufts of fur spring up along your spine as it twisted and mangled its shape into something new. Your eyes blurred as you felt the bones in your face collapsing and extending, ears rising up and canines lengthening in your still too small mouth.
The next time your foot hit the ground it was no longer a foot, but a paw. The squelching sound of mud making contact with the pads of it. You had been running fast but now the speed was unparalleled. Heavy panting as you pushed yourself to the brink of exhaustion.
You still had miles to go but the howling was far off in the distance growing further away and that’s how you liked it. How it’d need to be for as long as it took you to figure out the next step.
The covers you woke up in were caked in mud, it crunched as you shifted in the bed, pattering to the floor surely creating a mess. You groaned stretching your arms overhead, human arms, the muscles sore and aching from how far you’d run last night.
Even the edges of your feet and tips of your ears felt taut with tension and soreness. Rubbing a hand over your face, coming away with more dirt.
“Shit.”
“Shit is right, look at the state of this room.” A friendly face poked her head in through the doorway. She was tall, elegant limbs covered in a chunky sweater and leggings. Dark brown hair pulled up into a messy bun, light hazel eyes filled with a touch of mischief.
“I’m sorry, Celeste. I promise I’ll clean everything up.” She moved over to the side of the bed, holding a mug of something that smelled heavenly. Gesturing for you to take it, the heat seeping into the palms of your tired hands.
“I’m not worried about it. Here, drink. You need something to warm your bones.” You nodded taking a long drawn out sip. The liquid was chocolatey with a medicinal hint that washed over your tongue and seemed to heat your insides up almost immediately.
“It should help with well…everything.” She gave a half hearted smile, shrugging one shoulder up, before adjusting the edge of her sweater. “You came a very long way.” You finished the drink, setting the mug into the side table next to you. The warmth began to leech into your bones finally and you felt immensely grateful for Celeste and her healing abilities.
“I couldn’t stay. I had to…I just-time was running out.” The reassuring smile gave way to an earnest look of sympathy.
“They can kill you for this.” You swallowed thickly, all too aware of the dangers you had put yourself in. The odds hadn't been in your favor but you had to take a chance, to get away from home. Home. It felt a sham to even call it that.
“I know. And I’m beyond grateful you letting me stay here the night but I promise I’ll be out of your hair soon.” Celeste made a waving gesture in the air, dismissing your words.
“Don’t be ridiculous, stay as long as you need.” The kindness created a fist in your throat, you’d been friends for years, writing letters back and forth since visiting often wasn’t allowed.
Rival pack members weren’t allowed to associate with one another more than their Alphas permitted.
You bit the inside of your cheek in an attempt to shove down the hatred and anger you felt for your pack. To call them such a thing felt like a crime in and of itself. They were horrible and controlling, to think of yourself free from them felt exciting and terrifying.
“You could get in trouble.” You nearly whispered, even though no one was around to hear. She brushed off the notion.
“We’ll figure out a place for you to stay in the meantime. Has it started?” You gave a brief nod, not wanting to talk about it. The temperature of your skin, the cramping, that undeniable ache that shook you to your core. Like your body was no longer your own. It was infuriating and deliciously tortuous.
“Then in a few days when it’s over we can figure out what to do from there.”
“Your brother is gonna kill you.”
“What he doesn’t know won’t kill him.”
“Speak for yourself.” Celeste only gave you a smirk before squeezing your shoulder in a comforting fashion.
“Alright up, I need to change these sheets. A dirty dog rolled all over in them.”
That night felt like hell, a worse cycle than you’d ever had before. The winges of pain and agony ached through your system. It felt like your body had been tossed into a blazing fire.
In fact that sounded much better than what you felt now. Heats were different for every pack member but you couldn’t recall a time when you wished you were unconscious instead of enduring it.
You had needed to get away from your town, your pack before this happened. Before you were tied to the worst man you’d ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You were his property in his mind and the idea of you turning him down, running away rather than accepting his forced mating had surely sent him into a rage.
Maybe your body knew what had been coming and was throwing a fit in rebellion even now that you were in safe territory or maybe the strain and stress of escaping and being on the run had done you in.
Either way no matter how many cold showers you took, how many naps your forced yourself into, how many times your own hands attempted to hit their mark, it wasn’t enough.
Celeste had left a hearty brew of tea for you that was supposed to help, you’d chugged the whole thing down to the shock of your friend and still nothing. Or maybe it had helped and this was the edge being taken off.
Being hit by a bus felt less excruciating than this.
You somehow managed to fall asleep and when you woke your mouth felt dry, the familiar ache between your legs remained unsatisfied.
You wanted to tear the pillows on the bed to pieces, watching the feathers explode and drift down around you as your screamed into the frigid air.
You couldn’t even keep the window open for fear of Celeste's male pack members smelling you and paying an uninvited visit. Tipping off her brother that you were here, potentially getting her in loads of trouble.
Your fingers itched to tear open the window and taste the cold November breeze. Your nails scratched gouges in the white paint on the window sill as you stared longingly out at the frost bitten garden.
A soft knock came at the door, seeing your friend slipping into the room with another pot of strong smelling tea. Celeste sat the tea down on the side table, noting your frustrating posture by the window.
“I’m sorry, I know exactly how you feel.”
“I hate it.” It sounded like a whine, maybe it was but at this point you didn’t care.
“I have to go out and run some errands in town but I promise it won’t be long. Drink the rest of this, I put something in it to help your frazzled nerves and maybe even get you to sleep.”
The thought of sleeping another 48 hours and waking up normal again sounded so enticing.
“Thank you.” You crawled into bed staring out the window imagining running freely through the forest, only this time not away from something but towards something better.
Something that felt intangible right now. Tossing back a long swig from the tea pot and letting your eyes shutter close for however long they’d allow.
The hours crawled by and you felt yourself somewhere in a slumber and waking titration. Eventually you could see the sun was lower in the sky, mid to late afternoon maybe?
Your body groaned in revolt as you got up from the bed, joints creaking and popping, clasping the now empty teapot in your hands.
You could feel the sweat dripping down your brow, swiping at it, rubbing at your eyes anything to avoid feeling how warm your whole body felt.
Celeste hadn’t come home yet and you managed to scrub the pot clean, place it in the drying rack and wash a dish or two more. Just to feel useful for once.
Wanting to be the least invasive houseguest as you could, moving over to where the washroom was and folding some of the sheets spilling out of the dryer. The small menial tasks actually helped contain the disjointed feeling your body was experiencing.
The sound of a key being inserted into the side door, unlocking and closing alerted your ears that Celeste was home. You felt too tired and pained to call out to her, instead waiting to see her face pop around the corner, but it didn’t.
Footsteps echoed across the wooden floor and sounds of bags being dropped onto the kitchen island, accompanied by the soft sound of items, perhaps fruit, falling out and rolling along the granite. Then you smelled it.
The most intoxicating scent that had ever graced your nose. It was pine trees and fresh crisp air, like looking up into the night sky on a winter evening. It had a bite at first that smoothed into a warm rich earthy quality. There was even a hint of spice, it overtook every one of your senses, like you’d been bathed in it.
This wasn’t Celeste.
Your ears strained to listen to anything this visitor was doing, whoever it was they had a key. Fuck. Celeste hadn’t told anyone you were here. Your muscles tensed, noticing all sounds from the kitchen had ceased.
Attempting to pad as quietly as you could out of the washroom, venturing a quick look into the kitchen. Sure enough there were grocery bags with oranges spilling out onto the island but no one around.
Silence.
If you could just sneak to the back door, you could see it from your point of view. One quick leap and you’d be gone and able to shift and disappear into the fast approaching night.
One step, then another. You were always known for being quiet in your pack, able to sneak up on any prey. This was no different.
Another few steps and you’d be home free. You felt the cool wooden floor kiss the tips of your toes before the strongest force you’d ever felt knocked you from your feet.
Your legs barely touched the ground before your back was slammed into the nearest wall, tauntingly so close to the back door. Large strong hands held you in place, your shoulders pinned against the drywall.
The scent you’d smelled before consumed you, your traitorous body arching against the wall towards the source.
“Who are you?” The voice was deep, a hint of gravel. Male. You felt your vision clearing from your head smacking against the hard surface to see sure enough a large man in front of you.
He was tall, towering over you, lean and athletic, muscles strained under his white shirt, corded along his forearms down to his hands that stilled you.
You felt the anxious pull to look down, to not meet his eyes. The undeniable mark of an alpha, it irked you to no end. Taking a steadying breath you fought your body, looking up into his face.
He was handsome, carved from rock and earth and dusted with something you couldn’t quite place.
Dark brown hair that fell across his forehead, the sides were closely cropped but the rest hung longer, down to eyes that were such a deep brown you could lose yourself in them easily.
You could only imagine how radiant they’d look, flecks of gold catching the light when he smiled, but right now they were cold, calculating. The air caught in your throat, a choking noise all you could muster.
Your arms flexed against the wall, knowing you couldn’t escape but dying to, begging to. His nostrils flared, you watched the pupils in his eyes dilate, consuming the already deep brown gazing back at you. His fingers gripped you tighter.
“I said…who are you? Why are you in my sisters house?”
“I…I.” Your brain couldn’t form words, not now. The scent of him, the feel of his touch against your heated skin, you could feel dampness spreading between your legs, the slow ache building inside your body clawing to get out.
Your inner wolf was barely continued under your skin, a popping sensation in your ears, the room felt like it was spinning.
It was like he could sense everything going on in your body, the way his eyes roamed ravenously over your flushed skin, his fingers flexing against your arms, the intensity of his gaze.
It was a split second but you could feel his face pressed into the crook of your shoulder, hear him inhale you deeply. Groaning as he exhaled, there would be bruises on your body where he gripped you so tightly.
You couldn’t hide the gasp that left your lips feeling his hips pressed against your own, his arousal evident. You felt your hands reaching for his back and his grip lessened enough to let you, your nails scraping against his muscled back through his shirt.
The noise he made rumbled in his chest, you could nearly feel it reverberating through your own body. The scratch of stubble scraping against the soft skin of your neck as he breathed deeply the scent of your heat and your legs yearned to be wrapped around his waist and carried to the nearest flat surface.
A bed, the couch, the floor-
“Hey, HEY!” You felt his hands fall from your arms as another voice rang through the room.
Celeste was wedging herself between the two of you, arms out protectively in front of you. “Billy! What the fuck are you doing here?!”
The man before you took a step back, his eyes were still pitch black, his chest heaving, fingers clenching and unclenching as if testing that they were truly not holding you anymore.
“Celeste. You know this woman?”
“I do! This is Aurora, she’s-she's my friend.” His eyes narrowed on you.
“I don’t recall ever being introduced to her before.”
Celeste glanced worriedly between the two of us, I nodded at her, the most encouragement I could offer at the moment.
“She’s…uh…. She left her pack.” His eyes widened a touch, lips parting, taking a solid deep breath before looking back at Celeste.
“Celeste….” His words were a warning, tinged with anger, frustration, concern…
“I know! But she needed to get out of there, they were gonna force her to mate with a homicidal maniac of an alpha!”
“An alpha?” His tone was harsh and abrupt, rubbing the bridge of his noise, lines forming on his brow. “Jesus Christ, Celeste. Do you know how dangerous this is? To us? To the pack?”
“Forced Mating, Billy! That’s barbaric!” He sighed, leaning back against the kitchen counter, running a hand through his already mussed hair.
“It is. I know that as much as you, but some packs…still participate in the old ways…” his words weren’t convincing anyone, you could see it in the strained expression on his face.
You drew a steady breath , hesitantly pushing away from the wall you had just been pinned to. You missed the feeling of heat from his body being so close to yours already.
“I…I can leave. No. I think I should, Celeste, he’s right. This is dangerous you guys can get in a lot of trouble hiding a rival pack member. If you were to get caught it could be…it could be bad.”
Billy and Celeste both were looking back at you, you could see the similarities between the two. The dark hair and long lean stature, Billy’s eyes were significantly darker, but they shared similar noses and mannerisms. How they stood, staring you down, intimidating and beautiful.
“Rory…where would you go?” Your friend sounded so incredibly sad, it broke your heart. “Plus it’s not safe…”
“Once my cycle is over, I’ll leave.” Billy watched you with the focus of a pack leader and in the way only a wolf could. At the mention of your heat you noticed how his nostrils flared, chest rising into a territorial puff. “I’ll find somewhere to go.”
Celeste walked over to you, grabbing your hand and pulling you into a hug. You held her tightly, the overwhelming feeling of fear and frustration from your body and emotions beginning to take a tighter hold of you.
“Wait.” A deep sigh came from where Billy stood. “We can figure…something out. Until you have a safe place to go.” His dark eyes were no longer black orbs but the brown had returned, a softness, and something else danced across them as he spoke to you.
“But-“ he raised a finger, the look of admonishment towards his younger sibling. “Do NOT let anyone else know she’s here until I say, and make sure she stays in the house until... well until it’s safe.”
You watched as he gathered his keys from the island, turning to walk across the kitchen, his heavy motorcycle boots louder than they had felt before, followed by the sound of the door closing behind him.
You knew what you had seen in his eyes, because you could feel it just as deeply. Longing. And something just below the surface, barely concealed but there nonetheless.
#billy russo#ben barnes#the punisher#billy russo x reader#billy russo x female reader#billy russo fanfic#the punisher fanfiction#ben barnes character#the punisher au#Alpha!Billyrusso#Alpha!BillyRusso#werewolf#werewolf fanfic#a/b/o dynamics#punisher au
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Ellaaaa please tell us about your show!!! I want the whole account (if you want to/when you have time ofc)!! I'm so happy you got to hear fine line live ahhh you totally deserved it!!!
AAAAAAHHHHHHHH KIND ANON I CAN SCREAM ABOUT IT FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
so we had front of stage tickets and it was 100% the best ticket ive ever had so far: zero effort for an insane view and a fantastic place in the crowd with all the space we needed to dance and more. i've queued before and just really never want to again for more than enough reasons, and here was shown how i seriously didn't need to.
wet leg was epic. i am obsessed with them they are so fucking cute and also cool and also hot and also good. yes. i screamed my frustrations to the sky with them and all was good in the world.
and then. i'll just say immediately that the setlist is fantastic and definitely the best collection of songs i've ever heard of his, despite lights up not being there. the beginning was super fun and energetic, he is a master showperson, but it's in a way that is uniquely his. you can look at him and be in awe of the grandiose performance filling that entire stage, and then see that he's also smirking, skipping along the runway and pulling faces at his band. it's just. !!!!!!!!! you know?!?!?
my soul left my body during stockholm syndrome. goosebumps forever, bc of the sheer disbelief that im hearing a 1d song live. harry smiling, us screaming.
i've always wanted to hear she live, too, so that was just... mesmerizing. there were orchids projected on stage and it was all so perfectly fitting. our orchid, our mermaid. note the colors as well :')
then it was a big fucking party. just dancing and singing like we've never done before. he really felt happy and like he felt good, so happy and jokey. he grabbed Three pride flags during tpwk, and this was my first time witnessing the brass quartet as well. it was a BIG FUCKING PARTY
grapejuice is also so fun live. it's always such an experience to hear him sing a song live that he hasn't really sung before. i could tell that it's a tough one to sing, but he made it fun and quirky and cute.
aaaaaand THEN HE SANG FINE LINE. he sang fine line. holy shit. this is like. i grieved when he decided to stop singing it last european leg, it hit me hard. i think i've said it a shitton of times already on here but fine line is a song i listen to every morning and every night, it's the only thing that can calm me through a panic attack. it's an anthem of perseverance, hope and self-love. hearing it live was just me being transfixed, mesmerized, by what was unfolding in front of me, and slowly crying more and more. a tight tight hug from @bluewinnerangel through the sobs at the end was necessary bc we were all falling apart. in the best way
the darkness and pause after that were also necessary to get us back on track, for a show that was going to rake us through the entire spectrum of the human emotion once more. sign of the times was just. gasp
the PARTY that then ensued during wmyb. that bse intro is something else. any 1d reference obviously unlocks something unhinged in my brain that makes me fucking lose it, but hooooly shit. it goes SO HARD. wmyb always does and i'll never get sick of it.
to finish us off, of course, we have our rock: kiwi. the heaviness of that intro is addictive. his menacing gaze when he's choosing who to soak. the fucking SONG GOES SO HARD. IM HAVING YOUR BABAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY
and then it was over. but it felt extra extra good bc i knew i would be experiencing it again hahahrghr and my body is definitely stiff from the legit workout i did during the concert last night so. holy shit fuck yes
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fuck it i want to talk about the kiss.
because this kiss is perfect. absolutely perfect.
regardless of the exact level of experience these two actually have with the mechanics of kissing (and i would guess it’s not much), kissing like this is new to both of them.
stede has been accidentally giving ed an entire ocean of mixed signals. because this say fellas, is it gay when involves a list of things like ‘leans in close and treats you kindly and wears your pants and so desperately wants to make you happy and offers to co-captain a ship’ as well as ‘picks up zero hints, does not seem to be aware of the way you want to kiss him, there’s some chick named mary up in this, fuckin for REAL is he gay or from new zealand???? i cannot fucking measure this ratio, it’s so weird’ & etc
so ed has been making aborted moonlight leans and being like STAB ME! THE STABBING IS A METAPHOR! PLEASE WOULD YOU GET WITH THIS, MY THIRST IS INTENSE and staring at stede like he’s made entirely out of red silk handkerchiefs, etc.
and now that the shit has truly hit the fan ed finally, finally, is like. fuck it. here we are, alone on a beach together, my beard is gone and your ship is gone and everything is fucked up, but just being with you makes me happy.
literally at this point why not? worst case, stede clarifies that ed has been misreading the feelings building between them.
(it must be said because thinking it hurts and i am nothing but generous with sharing the pain: that he misread stede like he misread the party at first, because the rules of the social road ed learned require a whole different set of skills than stede learned in his fancy world of melon spoons and tureens.)
ed knows that if stede rejects him, he can always skip out to nurse his wounds alone. this is a perfect fuck it, shooting my shot moment.
so he pushes past the false start where he gets derailed by turtles and toes (and neatly sets up the finale at the same time, i love good writing i really do) and just lays it all out. right now, he doesn’t want to curve to fit around the spaces somebody else wants him to fill: he wants to do what makes ed happy.
and then because stede is at his core so fucking kind, he comes through in the clutch here and says the exact right thing once again, just like he did when he told ed he wore fine things well. there are a lot of responses stede could give here that would be... fine, or terrible, but this is the perfect one.
what makes ed happy means: i care what makes you happy. i might even want to be the one making you happy, on a longterm and regular basis.
it also means: i’m not going to staple my narrow, not you-approved idea of what makes you happy on your face and then get pissed when you’re not 100% into it, because that is a clear pattern in your life.
literally the best and most beautiful thing stede could have said. unerringly hitting the heart of the things ed wants most, and totally on accident.
and then ed delivers the favor in kind, finishing it off with the absolute perfect thing he could say to stede, slowly because hooooly shit this is much scarier than getting stabbed and also totally on accident: stede makes him happy.
not just the fun they’ve had together, or the access to shared fancy pants and plans to match. just stede, existing in the world at all, and being by ed’s side.
which implies, even in these much less pleasant circumstances stede makes him happy. (and the unthinkable thought: if stede makes ed happy when things are generally not going well, maybe ed could still feel that way even if stede himself makes him unhappy once in a while.
you know: like how people are when they say they love you and they mean it.)
so stede bluescreens a bit because this is the first compliment of his life on this calibre and also he has no idea what to say to that, since he’s never heard it before! literally nobody has been like: hey stede. the fact that you’re in the world is very cool. you yourself are a net positive, and you make me happy just by existing.
AND THEN. THE FUCK IT TIPPING POINT. SHE IS HERE.
it’s not a teenage first date thing, though the vibes aren’t far off: but these are two men who just heard and said the thing the other most wanted to hear.
what makes you happy, ed? / what makes ed happy is you.
they both emphasize the other in that moment; they both receive everything they’ve ever wanted.
(also it’s just some super fun wordplay. hate this team.)
anyway: the best slightly awkward but incredibly perfect first kiss.
i love that neither of them are in the perfect position for this; i love that stede is 100% not prepared and ed has to shift to keep it going and drops his hand slowly to the middle of stede’s back while he raises the other to touch his neck, and his FINGERS BRUSH STEDE’S THROAT which, fuck that. throats are vulnerable; thin skin, jugulars, the place where the pulse beats, etc. vampires like throats, weird serial killers like throats, lovers like throats. it’s all very metaphors gone wild and tender, because you have to feel pretty safe to let somebody touch your throat on purpose.
anyway: i love stede’s little ‘mmph!’ sound, it’s all just so fucking perfect.
and then ed cups stede’s face and i want to gnaw on SHEET METAL and he KEEPS IT THERE? KEEPS IT THERE. “your hand on my chest is my hand” style? look. i just. i hate the little details each of the actors on this stupid mean to me show emphasizes. the physicality of this cast is fucking insane and it makes me want to go full red stringboard doing a rewatch for each character and only paying attention to what they’re doing so i can really appreciate all these ridiculously talented people.
this show ruined my life, news at eleven, i will never think about anything else.
so yeah! ed is STILL CRADLING STEDE’S JAW stede is saying you make stede happy, i am throwing my fucking tv out the window, etc.
aaaaand then they start making the kind of plans that don’t have great longterm feasibility and the narrative starts to get the road ready for chauncey to royally fuck things up for everybody-slash-probably make things better in the long run but turns out we do not, in fact, have to hand it to chauncey for derailing a plan that would eventually have led to things going sour and then i cry, but that’s for the recaps etc.
#our flag means death#ofmd spoilers#my ofmd meta#how obsessed with this show am i? normal amount#hbo JUST RENEW IT ALREADY#they better give us the nod on s2 and 3 at once or i s2g#fuckin corporate fucks gimme our pirates
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