#he does not and will never see jacob as his equal
Note
so i've followed your stuff for a while now, & i have something embarrassing to admit, when i was 14 and scrolling through the g/t tag on ao3 (it was some years ago) i found your jacob & edix fic, and i was so upset after reading it that to calm myself down i had to imagine an entire scenario where a vengeful giant brutally killed edix to save jacob. i'm so sorry your writing is lovely but i hate edix so much. that mofo needs to die. jacob get behind me
when someone finally gets just how fucked up edix is and that he's literally the villain of the entire series no matter how much he tries to justify it on his end
if you also want to hear a secret a big reason i wrote the milo and ben story despite not really liking the borrower trope that much was because i also read a fic on ao3 about an exterminator doing something too fucked up for my liking to a borrower colony so i wrote a (somewhat) fluffy.......ish story to make me feel better and then abandoned it halfway for like a year until i needed a bday gift fic for my bestie lmao
#ask#anon#EDIX SHOULD MAKE YOU MAD HE MAKES ME MAD FOR EVERYTHING MY SWEET BABY JACOB HAS TO GO THROUGH#and for that reason i love him (:#because i love fucked up lil fearplay power dynamics and the angst and the hurt no comfort MMMM#like listen to me#edix is not some cute lil plant nerd just being a silly guy with cat ears#he is actively and willingly a part of an invading species that either forces alliances or destroys a planet's natural habitats#for their own goals of cataloguing the universe#he does not care about anyone's survival or wellbeing outside of the venandi and jacob and thats ONLY because he thinks jacob is a cutie#he does not and will never see jacob as his equal#does he love jacob? yes unconditionally. that doesn't mean its healthy or remotely absolve him of what he's done to him
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Duckie
Chapter 9
pairing: jake ‘hangman’ seresin x bradshaw!reader; bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw x twin sister!reader
characters: y/n bradshaw, nick bradshaw, jake seresin, penny benjamin, serenity hart, denver miller
word count: ~10.7k (don't kill me i know the chapter lengths are all over the place, i'm sorry)
warnings: language, parental doubts, canon character deaths mentioned, drinking, thunderstorms, jake being an absolute sweetheart
a/n: i want to apologize that is has been 8 months since i have last updated the main story, i really didn't think it would take that long... but i just wanted to make sure i was proud of the chapter and i really do think i am proud of it. so thank you for your patience and i hope you enjoy 💜
series summary: daughter of goose and carole and twin sister to bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw, y/n bradshaw also got her papers pulled when she tried to enlist in the Navy. which turned out to not be as bad as she thought.
chapter summary: a week after duckie and jake went on their "not-date" she is seriously regretting not getting jake's number before he left -- considering they haven't seen each other since. though, as fate would have it, that weekend they see each other at the beach and as duckie is walking away jake gets a push from his friends to get her number. little does he know he'll be getting much more than that from her
'duckie' universe
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It had been a hectic week since your ‘not date’ date with Jake and honestly… you were missing him. Nick was missing him too, hugging the cowboy manta ray every afternoon when he napped.
You were really kicking yourself for not getting his number, you had no way of talking to him. And you both were busy, you with school stuff and softball practices and Jake with his Top Gun classes. So you just had to bet on the off chance of running into him again.
Late that Saturday morning, you and Nick were walking the beach, occasionally splashing in the surf. You wanted to tire him out so when Serenity came over later to babysit, he wasn’t too much trouble.
At some point when you had been distracted, Nick had run off without you noticing, most likely seeing something he liked or wanted.
When you do notice his absence, it’s because you don’t hear giggling and splashing. You look down next to you and panic shoots through you when you see that your son isn’t right at your feet.
“Nick? Nick! Nicky!”
Your chest heaved with your panicked breathing, thoughts running through your mind a mile and a half a minute as you shouted and ran across the beach like a mad woman – shouting for your son.
How could this happen? How could you not notice that your toddler wasn’t right next to you? What kind of mother gets that distracted that she doesn’t even hear her child run off? How did you not notice? Why didn’t you hear him? Why did you let something else pull your attention away that fast and for that long?
Maybe those middle aged mothers in the store were right? Maybe you were too young to be a decent mom… Maybe you shouldn’t–
“Han’man!”
The small, but excited voice shut your thoughts off in an instant, relief flooding your entire body as you ran in the direction you heard your son – nearly tripping over your own feet in the panic.
You spotted the classic beach volleyball court and saw Jake pick him up, looking equally as confused as he was happy.
“Nick where’s your-”
“Nicholas Jacob!” You called, adrenaline still pumping through your body.
Your son yelped a little and turned into Jake’s neck upon hearing you shout as the pilot cringed. The first and middle name? Never a good sign.
“Oooh, someone’s in trouble,” he mumbled, instinctively rubbing the child’s back in order to keep him calm.
The other aviators noticed this and gave Hangman a confused look. They were in the middle of a volleyball match and then boom a toddler’s running into the pilot's legs. And now he was comforting said child, not something they would expect from him usually.
Nick threw his arms around Jake’s neck, not turning to look at you as you ran over, sliding a little as the sand shifted under your heavy steps. “You can’t just run off like that! Do you know how worried I was?!”
The other pilots probably should have looked away, minded their own business. But now they were very intrigued as you came up to Jake as he held your son.
And by the time you got in arms reach you had calmed down slightly, trying to channel your mother to help you handle this situation.
“Nicky,” you coaxed, as you got closer and reached out to rub his back. He just buried his face into Jake’s shoulder, a small cry coming from his lips as he hugged the pilot tighter. He hates yelling, he doesn’t like it when people are mad at him. You played with his curls, knowing that he thought you were angry, “Baby, I’m not mad… You just worry me when you run off like that. You are too much like your Uncle.”
Nick looked at you finally, but still rested his head on Jake’s shoulder. His eyes were red and you sighed, knowing that he still thought you were mad. “I’m sorry I shouted, Nicky. Mama’s not mad at you. I promise.” He sniffled and reached out for you. You smiled softly and took him into your arms, then he promptly buried his face into your shoulder.
“I’m so sorry, guys,” you apologized, looking around at all the pilots. “I don’t know how he got away from me.” Jake shook his head, waving it off with a flick of his wrist, “It’s okay. I was winnin’ anyway.” You laughed, bouncing Nick instinctively, “Alright, well, we’ll leave you to it.” You adjusted Nick on your hip, smiling at the men before walking away.
Jake watched you walk away before turning back to his classmates, clapping his hands together and ready to start the next match. But he was met with crossed arms and expecting looks. “Okay let’s – What?”
“You’re in so deep, Hangman,” Denver, also known as ‘Ransom’, said with a teasing scoff. “Have you gotten her number yet?”
The blond shook his head, “No but I figured she’d offer it when she was ready.” The other pilot rolled his eyes. “Seresin, since when have you ever waited for her to make the move?” Jake huffed, “She’s different. I don’t want to move too fast. I want her to know that I’m all in first.”
Denver crossed his arms, “Hangman, go ask her. Show her you’re all in. She won’t know if you don’t tell her. And I’m pretty sure she’s a little nervous to ask you. You know… given that she doesn’t know!”
Jake’s eyes widened in realization, making the brunette laugh as Jake jogged after you, “Hey, Y/N, wait up!”
You turned as he called out to you, Nicky looking up as well from his spot on your shoulder. Looking up at him as he slowed down to a stop in front of you, you tilted your head a little, “Yeah?”
He took a few deep breaths, talking with one hand as the other rested on his hip, “First I want to preface, it’s totally cool if you say no. But we’ve been getting to know each other, and I was wondering if I could get your number?”
You looked at Nick then back at Jake, thinking about your response carefully. “I’ll be at the bar tonight. Come by and we’ll talk about it.”
Jake nodded, and smirked, “I look forward to it.” He ruffled Nick’s hair before going back to the group.
You smiled, eyeing him as he walked away – a little more confidence in his step as he walked up to his friend.
You know you were kicking yourself before for not getting his number, but now that he’s asked you… you were hesitant, you felt like you had a lot you needed to tell him before you took this step.
Sighing a little, you adjusted Nick on your hip again and made your way back to your car.
During the drive home, Nicky was quiet and played with the shells he had found on the beach.
You knew he was still upset from when you yelled, and you knew that he didn’t quite understand why you were so worried. He was only three after all, and he had so much wonder that it was a miracle he didn’t run off to squash his curiosities more often.
He did need to understand why you had shouted and why you were so worried, it was important that he knew that.
But neither of you were ready to give nor receive that conversation. You were still thrumming with that anxiety from the 90 second eternity it took to find him and he was still upset from when you yelled at him. You just needed to wait for when you got home after you both calmed down.
When you got home, you gave Nicky his bath in near silence as you made sure all the sand was gone and he was clean of salt water.
You had thought through your side of the conversation and decided on how you were going to talk to him.
After getting him bathed and getting some comfy clothes picked out, you knelt in front of him as you helped him dry off.
“Nicky? Can we talk about what happened at the beach?”
He sniffed, nodding his head under the little shark hood of his towel.
You smiled softly at him and gave a gentle squeeze to his arms. “You know Mama isn’t angry right?” “You yelled… people yell when they’re angy…” His voice was soft and timid, he was trying not to cry again.
“Oh baby…” You tilted his head up and cupped his cheek. “Sometimes people yell when they’re angry or mad. But not all the time.” Confusion flashed over his tearfilled eyes and you sighed.
You sat back on your heels, wiping his tears away with your thumb. “People can yell for a lot of different reasons, Nick. Sometimes we yell or shout because we’re excited, we’ve done that before haven’t we? Like when you saw Hangman and shouted because you were so excited to see him.”
He nodded, using the towel to wipe his other eye as you gave him an encouraging smile.
“It all comes down to how we say something, and I know that might not make sense just yet, because you’re three, but it will and we’ll talk more about it then. But I know you don’t like yelling when people sound angry or mean, it’s loud and it can be scary, right?” He nodded again, sniffling a little, “Yeah…”
You nodded, dipping your head a little to look him in the eye. “And Mama’s sorry if she sounded angry or mean, that wasn’t my intention. But you running off like that scared me, it really really scared me. I didn’t know if you were hurt or lost.”
“But I was safe with Han’man… I was okay Mama…”
“I know that now. But in the moment I was really worried about you and I didn’t know where you had run off too. That’s why I shouted.”
You rubbed his arms, making sure to hold eye contact. “You can’t just run off like that without telling me. It makes me worried for your safety.”
The dam finally broke and Nick started sobbing. “I’m sorry Mama… I-I jus’ saw Han’man an-and wa-wanted to s-say hi…”
“I know, I know baby,” you cooed, wiping his tears as they fell. “And Mama forgives you, I know you didn’t mean to. And I know there will be times where you’re really really curious and you want to explore, but you have to tell me so I, or someone else, can make sure you’re safe. And there will be times I’m gonna yell, but I still love you okay? And I will do better to control my tone in the future.”
He sniffled and hugged you tightly, his little arms wrapping around your neck in a grip that rivaled a grown man. You smiled and adjusted your legs, crossing them before wrapping him tighter in his towel and pulling him into your lap.
You sat on his floor for a while, holding him close and rocking back and forth as you pressed kisses to the side of his head.
It wasn’t too long after that conversation that Serenity was using her spare key to come in, finding you and Nick giggling in the living room as you watched Kung Fu Panda.
“Looks like I’m missing all the fun,” she laughed, sitting her backpack down on the bar.
Nick sat up, a wide smile on his face, “Ren!” She smiled and walked over, her arms out wide for a hug, “Nicky J!” He got off the couch quickly and ran to her, hugging her with a high pitched giggle.
You smiled as you stood up, “Oh I don’t know about missing the fun, just a little late to the party.”
“Well, I guess I have some fun to catch up on,” she said as she ruffled Nicky’s curls. “And Mama can relax a little bit.”
You nodded because now that she was here you could take a shower and get ready to go to the bar. You needed the moment of solitude to collect yourself after your mild panic attack on the beach. Needed to take a second alone to let the parental mask slip and just let yourself feel.
“Yes, and I will be showering and getting ready to go to the bar. You both can finish the movie and give me the rundown when I come back.���
Serenity nodded, “You got it, we’ll take notes. Won’t we buddy?” Nicky nodded, “And we can act it out for you too!” You smiled and played with his hair, “Yes you can, and I look forward to it.” Nick giggled, running back over to climb on the couch and continue watching the movie.
You looked at the college student, brows raised as you let out a breath. She arched her eyebrow inquisitively, “Mama need me time?” You nodded, rubbing your hands on your thighs. “She needs so much me time. Had a bit of a scare at the beach and I need a minute to process it, without him two feet away… God, that sounds so bad doesn’t it?”
She shook her head, grabbing your wrist gently, “Not at all. You need space to breathe, that’s why I’m here – well, and cause I love that little man over there.” You both laughed, glancing over at the couch where Nick was zeroed in on the TV.
Her grip tightened momentarily to gain your attention again. “And you’re doing great, Y/N. Don’t ever question that.”
A rush of tears filled your eyes, a weight you hadn’t realized was sitting on your chest lifting ever so slightly and allowing you to actually breathe again. Biting your lip to keep from crying in front of your son, you hugged Serenity letting out a heavy exhale that released the obsessive thoughts that rattled in your head.
“Thank you…”
Your voice was no louder than a whisper, but your gratitude was nothing short of a scream.
Serenity rubbed your back, “And I will fight anyone that says otherwise. Even you. Understand?” She pulled back only when you did as you nodded and wiped your face. “Good,” she nodded towards your bedroom with a smile. “Now go shower.”
You nodded, squeezing her shoulder in thanks before jogging towards your room.
She smiled after you before turning to your son, clapping her hands as she walked over, “Okay Nicky, let’s make sure we get all the details for Mama.”
After your much needed shower, taking the solitary moment to breathe and let more tears fall to just release the stress, you got dressed in a pair of jeans and an old band t-shirt you had held onto from when you went through your mom’s things. And you added a black jacket because it had clouded over while you were in the shower.
And of course, Nicky gave you the rundown of what you missed of Kung Fu Panda while you got ready before going back to let you finish up.
You took a deep breath as you clasped the guitar pick necklace behind your neck, letting the engraved gold rest against your sternum. Kendall had gotten it for you for graduation, having your favorite lyric of Great Balls of Fire engraved on the front – because he indeed drove you crazy and vice versa. For Christmas, Penny went and had Kendall’s initials engraved on the back, knowing that you’d be giving the necklace to Nicky once he was old enough.
Letting the breath out and calming yourself down, you stepped out of your room and slipped your jacket on as you walked to the door. “Okay, I’m heading out. It looks like it might rain, so just call me if anything happens or you need me to come home, okay?”
Serenity nodded from her spot on the couch, popping a goldfish cracker into her mouth “Got it, go have fun.”
You squatted down and Nicky ran over to give you a hug. “Bye Mama, have fun with Han’man.” You smiled and rubbed his back, “I will. Be good for Ren okay? I won’t be back until after you go to bed, so I love you baby.” You gave him kisses all over his face, “Mwah, I love you sooo much.” He giggled and kissed your temple, “I love you too Mama.”
You shared a smile and he ran back to the couch to curl up in his corner.
“Okay, you know all the numbers Ren. If I don’t answer, call Penny or the bar. Okay, I’m gonna head out now, see if I can beat the rush of pilots that are gonna get grounded soon. I love you both, bye.”
They both waved at you as you grabbed your purse and walked out the door.
About 90 minutes and one Amarello after you arrived, you watched Jake stroll into the bar, his green eyes finding you leaning on the bar immediately despite the crowd in front of him.
“Howdy,” you greeted with a smile as he walked over and leaned on the bar next to you. “Hi, Darlin’,” he replied, grinning down at you.
You glanced around, the bar wasn’t as packed as you thought it would be, but it was still full of pilots since the surprise showers grounded their classes for the rest of the day.
You looked back at Jake, remembering his question from earlier today on the beach. As you drove over and the hour and half you had to yourself at the bar, you had tried your best to prepare your speech, get everything you needed to say in order so you didn’t fuck anything up and miscommunicate your feelings.
Sighing, you closed your eyes, recalling everything you had lined up to tell him. You didn’t look in his eyes, keeping your gaze centered on his chest, knowing his green irises would wipe your memory.
“I’m gonna be honest here Jake…”
He held up his hand, gently interrupting you, “I get it, Y/N. If you still aren’t ready for a relationship, I understand. But I still want to be a friend that you can call, whether it be just to talk to me or if you need help.”
You sighed, relief filling your chest knowing that he was willing to wait, but you still wanted, no needed, to tell him how you were feeling.
You finally looked up in his eyes, swallowing the word vomit of emotions that wanted to escape, “Jake, you have done a lot these past few weeks. You’ve taken the time not only to get to know me but to get to know Nick. That means so much to me, more than you know. And I can tell that Nick already likes you, so I can’t just let you out of our life easily.”
Jake smiled, bashfully looking down at the bar as a chuckle broke through his lips, “I try my best. And I’m a little offended that you thought getting rid of me would ever be easy.”
You rolled your eyes before continuing.
“And I do like you, Jake. I like you a lot. While you are cocky as hell, you’re sweet and a gentleman. It’s just…” You rocked on your feet, thinking of everything you needed to say but couldn’t put into words – your rehearsed lines disappearing into thin air now that Jake was here. Damn those eyes.
You hung your head, trying to see if looking away from him would help re-materialize the pre-coordinated words.
But Jake ducked his head to meet your eyes, showing you he was listening and chasing away your coherent thoughts, “It’s just what, Y/N?”
You glanced at Penny, receiving a reassuring nod from her and sending a short one back. “I’m gonna step outside really quick Pen, watch my drink?” She nodded and gave you a small, encouraging smile.
“Follow me,” you patted Jake's shoulder, and slid your hand down his arm to grab his hand.
You pulled him outside to the covered deck and leaned on the railing, taking a deep breath to inhale the scent of the rain – trying to reign in your racing thoughts.
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” Jake’s whiskey smooth voice asked as he leaned on the railing as well, his back facing the clouds.
You cleared your throat, dropping your head to look at the damp sand as you pieced together the puzzle of emotions and words in your head.
“My dad died when I was 4… He left my mom alone to raise 2 kids that were too much like their father. I told myself that I need to stay away from service men, definitely pilots. But you, and your perfect teeth and perfect hair, those damn green eyes…”
Jake was flattered but he could feel how this was going to end. You’d build up his ego to cushion his fall when you turned him down.
“You have become an exception to my one rule.” Okay… Jake certainly wasn’t expecting that. “A rule that I gave myself on my own. I’m just scared, Jake. Nick and I have grown so… close to you and I’m afraid–”
Jake lifted your chin, cutting you off, and quietly spoke to you, noting the thin line of tears in your water line. “Hey… I understand. But I’m a damn good pilot, I ain’t goin’ down easy.” You laughed, shaking your head fondly before smiling up at him, “There’s that ego.”
He chuckled softly, his trademark half-smile flashing a canine, “What can I say? But seriously, I will do whatever it takes to get back to you both safe. If that’s what you want.”
You nodded, stepping closer, unconsciously straightening your back to be closer to him, “I want it, I do.” You bit your lip, a shuddering breath escaping your lips.
His soft gaze hardened slightly, reading your body language, but it softened again as he tilted your chin up. “Then why are you hesitating?” You shrugged, shaking your head subtly, “I don’t know.”
You knew why, deep down you knew why you were holding back. Why you wanted to spray the butterflies in your stomach with vinegar. Your brain knew why. But your heart was pounding on your ribcage, trying to get to your brain to tell you it was okay. That you could love again, and it would all be okay.
Jake leaned down, seeing the fight in your eyes. “Is this okay?” You nodded, your breath mixing with his as you looked from his eyes to his lips and back again.
There was a soft eagerness, a puppy in those green eyes waiting to run around, bouncing as he waited for his command – a command only you could give. It was familiar but completely new at the same time. But it felt safe.
Instead of giving him the words he was looking for, you rested your hand on the side of his neck and pressed your lips to his – letting your heart take the wheel.
The kiss was soft, but it didn’t change the fact that butterflies went wild in both of your stomachs. Jake couldn’t help but smile against your lips as he cupped your jaw and tasted the hint of Amaretto on them.
You pulled away, needing to get air into your lungs but Jake chased your lips, catching them in their minty trap. It was clear he came prepared for anything, not that you minded.
Your free hand fisted in his jacket, wafting his cologne into the air – an all consuming, but not overwhelming scent.
You both finally pulled away from the chaste kiss, light headed and breathless. You stayed close, your noses brushing against each other.
“What’s gonna happen when you leave?”
Jake smirked, his breath still tickling your lips as he pulled out his phone, “Well, I’m not sure, but it’d be a hell of a lot easier with your number.” You laughed and finally looked up at him, stepping back a little to take his phone, “Smooth Lieutenant. Very smooth.”
As you and Jake held eye contact a smile settled across your face before you looked down at his phone, typing in your number and sending a text to yourself.
Jake couldn’t help the blush that darked his tanned cheeks at the sparkle of your smile that not even the rain could dim.
You weren’t like anything he’s ever seen before; a strong, single mother that did everything for the sake of her child and someone that had gone through so much at such a young age.
“You’re amazing…”
Jake hadn’t realized what he said out loud until you giggled and looked down at the deck with pink tinted cheeks.
“I said that out loud, didn't I?” He laughed at the end of his question. You nodded, “You did. But I’m flattered, so thank you.”
You messed with his jacket, “And you’re good, Lieutenant. Maybe too good to be true.”
“You’re stroking my ego, Darlin’.” You giggled and gave him a quick kiss, “I better head back in.” He grabbed your waist, “Do you have to?” “Do you want to have fun or not?” He bit his lip and you patted his chest and walked in.
He watched you walk in and shook his head. Laughing to himself he adjusted his posture and went in and straight to the pool table.
You and Jake hung out at the bar for hours after that, having the time of your life.
You danced to the music that came from the jukebox, played darts and you watched him play pool. You drank and ate, Penny keeping an eye on you both because you had to drive back home to your son and Jake did not need a hangover in the morning.
But you didn’t need the drinks to have a good time. Like right now. Jake had suggested another round of darts, but this time, you added a few spins before your throw. Almost like kids getting ready to hit a pinata at a party.
Jake grinned as he spun you around a few times. “Okay, now that you’re properly dizzy, why don’t you try and get a bullseye?”
“You’re kidding me,” you giggled as you swayed a little on your feet. “I doubt I’m gonna hit the target. I can’t hit it when I’m standing straight, what makes you think I can hit it when I’m dizzy?”
He shook his head and turned you by your shoulders to square up to the board. “Who knows, maybe you’ll be better?” You snorted as you raised the dart, “I highly doubt that.” He scoffed playfully, “Just throw the dart, Y/N.”
You giggled, “Okay okay.”
Your tongue poked out of the seam of your lips as your vision swam a bit and you lined up your shot.
Taking a few balk throws, you finally get ready to actually throw it when there is a harsh crack, followed by a loud, booming sound – loud enough to rattle the windows.
“Oh shit!”
Any attempt you had made to actually aim the dart didn’t matter, because when you jumped at the harsh thunder the dart was sent on its own journey.
You laughed at your reaction to the sudden thunder and leaned back against Jake, “I can blame that horrible throw on the thunder, right?” He looked over your shoulder, seeing the dart about a foot and a half under the board in the wall.
“You sure it was thunder?”
Your jaw dropped and you smacked his chest with the back of your hand, “That was uncalled for Seresin. But I walked into that one.” You both laughed as Jake nodded, “Yeah, I guess I can give you another shot Bradshaw.”
“Well, thank you oh so gracious Hangman,” you sassed a little as you readied another dart. “I’m actually gonna try this time.”
He chuckled and crossed his arms as he watched you repeat your process, his eyes drawn to your lips as your tongue once again pokes out.
You managed to throw the dart just as the lights flickered out.
“Are you fucking serious? The weather really doesn’t want me to hit this board,” you grumbled as you pulled your phone out to use your flashlight.
Jake did the same, him immediately shining it at the dart board.
“Look at what we have here, you actually hit the board,” he teased as he walked up to the board. “Not a bullseye, but you hit it.” You flipped your hair, “Look at me go. Mama’s still got it.”
Jake gave you a look, his face deadpanned and his brow low. You held his eyes, yours playfully squinting.
It was a standoff for about 20 seconds before you both started laughing.
“C’mon Mother Goose, let’s go to the bar,” he chuckled as he grabbed your hand gently.
You froze for a second, confused as to where he got that nickname from – forgetting it was just a nursery rhyme to everyone else at that moment.
He looked at you, frowning in concern, “Hey, sweetheart, you okay?”
You shook it off, swallowing as you nodded, “Yeah, yeah… I’m okay.”
With a furrowed brow, he stepped closer, tilting your chin up with a crooked finger, “You’re not afraid of the dark, are you?”
His light tease pulled you back fully.
“N-No, I’m fine, it’s okay,” you said softly as you shook your head. He cupped your cheek, “Are you sure?” You nodded, “Yeah, yeah, just thought of Nicky… He’s not the best with storms sometimes.”
“Do you wanna check in on him? Make sure he’s doing okay? Especially now that the power’s out.”
You chewed on your lip, your thumb and pinky tapping rhythmically on your thigh. “Are you sure it’s okay?”
Jake nodded, “Of course it is! That’s your baby, do not question if it’s okay. It’s always okay.” You immediately open your contacts, “Thank you.”
He smiled, squeezing your hand, “I’ll be at the bar when you’re ready, if you gotta go home, that’s okay.”
You gave him a smile and mouthed a ‘thank you’ as your phone rang, waiting for Serenity to pick up.
Jake nodded again before going over to the bar.
Penny and Jimmy were turning on battery powered lanterns and setting them up around the bar.
“You guys need some help?” Jake offered as he leaned on the bar.
She looked up at him as she sat a lantern down on the bar, “You don’t think you could get the power back on, could ya?”
Jake laughed lightly, “If my call sign was Sparky, I might be able to give it a shot. Unfortunately, it’s not.” Penny shook her head with a laugh, “It’s alright Hangman, once we get these set up, we’ll hopefully get the generator up and running.”
He nodded, “In the meantime, I’ll take two waters, if you can spare them.” She nodded with a smile, “Coming right up.”
As she got the bottles out of the ice bucket she prepped after looking at the forecast, you came over after finishing up your call.
You sighed a little as you sat down.
“Hey,” Jake greeted as he rubbed your knee. “How’s the little man holdin’ up? He alright?” You nodded, smiling as you rested your hand on his, “Yeah, Serenity said he was snuggled up on the couch with his turtle and his manta ray, watching movies with plenty of goldfish crackers.”
Penny popped up, “You have power?”
“Nope,” you laughed a little awkwardly. “He’s watching it on Serenity’s laptop. Which I told her she didn’t have to let him do that. She’s got stuff to do for summer classes but mine was dead. I just hope she doesn’t get behind.”
She gave you your water, “She’s a good kid, I’m sure she’ll be okay for one night.” You nodded and sipped your drink, “Yeah.”
You looked around noticing that everyone started to mellow out since the place was practically pitch black – save for the lanterns.
“Man… seems the lights weren’t the only thing the storm took out. How long until the generator is up and running?” You asked, leaning on the bar.
Penny shrugged, “I don’t know. It depends, we haven’t used it in a few years. It shouldn’t take too long, I think Jimmy checked on it after the clouds rolled in and the forecast changed.”
You nodded and looked around, “Well, maybe some live music can hold everyone over until then.” Penny and Jake furrowed their brows as you grabbed a lantern and went over to the piano.
“What? Did you seriously think that Bradley was the only one of my father’s kids that could play? C’mon now Penny, you should know better than that,” you teased with a playful wink over your shoulder.
Jake furrowed his brow, “Have you been holding out on me Mother Goose?” His tone was entirely playful as he came over to piano with his phone flashlight on as a fresh toothpick hung from his lips.
Penny blinked and looked up, a rush of nostalgia hitting her, “Wait did you just call her ‘Mother Goose’?” Jake looked up at her and nodded as he rolled the toothpick to the other side of his mouth, “Yes ma’am I did.” She nodded and glanced at you as she wiped down the bar, “And um… w-where did that nickname come from?”
He shrugged, “She’s got a little duck on her keychain and she’s a mama. Just kinda makes sense, I guess. Why do you ask?”
You couldn’t help but smile a little as you tapped the keys.
“Oh I was just-” Penny started but you cut her off gently.
“Goose was my dad’s call sign, Jake. A lot of his friends from the Academy and flight school called him ‘Mother Goose’,” you said, emotion present in your voice but you weren’t sad.
Jake stumbled over his words a little, “Oh I-I had no idea. I can stop if you w-want me too.”
You shook your head, a smile gracing your features as you looked up at him, “No no, it’s okay Jake. It definitely shocked me when you called me that earlier, but it’s… nice.”
He smiled back at you and sat down, “I’ll call you whatever you want, Darlin’.”
A giggle slipped past your lips and you were now thankful that the poor lighting hid the blush on your cheeks as you tested more keys.
You took a breath and readied your fingers on the right keys, “Okay okay, let’s get these people fired up.”
Jake arched his brow but then you played the opening notes to a song he heard non-stop in flight school when the class went out to a bar.
“Jerry Lee Lewis? You really are Bradshaw’s sister,” he laughed, gently nudging your shoulder but not so much as to mess you up.
You just rolled your eyes before jumping into the song. “~You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain!~”
Jake chuckled as people in the bar began to cheer, a few patrons jumping in to sing with you. He looked around, seeing that the flashlights on phones had been turned on and everyone’s moods seemed to flip on dime.
“~You broke my will! Oh what a thrill!~”
“~Goodness gracious great balls of fire!~”
His eyes landed back on you, watching you play the piano like he had only ever seen your brother play. It was lively, bringing an energy to the bar that got zapped out with the electricity. Almost as if the lightning hit you and you soaked up all the energy in the bar, and now you were returning it when it was needed.
He felt himself singing along, unable to escape the way that your infectious voice seemed to latch on to everyone that heard it.
Jake had always fought the urge to ‘feel the music’ when it was your brother. Be the one person in the bar unaffected by him. But here with you, he didn’t fight. He didn’t want to fight it. And he was unashamed to be sitting next to you on that piano bench, singing a song that you were sure your brother had played to death.
He saw you smile at him when you noticed it, feeding off of his energy just as much as he was feeding off of yours.
You found yourself looking only at him to see if he was enjoying himself, using him as a reference point for how the rest of the bar was feeling. That your attempt at entertainment was working.
It felt good to see everyone having fun because of you.
Now you could understand why your dad and Bradley did this so often.
Your smile never left your face as you continued to sing, though you hated how the song was coming to an end so soon.
Jake met your eyes as you started the last verse, his smiling matching yours.
“~I chew my nails and I twiddle my thumbs!~”
“~Real nervous but it sure is fun!~”
He watched your eyes light up as he sang the words back to you and the blush crawled up your neck. You clearly weren’t expecting him to sing that line to you – telling you how you made him feel through the song.
So, he continued to look at you, holding eye contact as he sang through a wide, infectious smile, using the lyrics to convey what he had trouble putting into words once again.
“~Come on, baby! You’re drivin’ me crazy!~”
His heart fluttered when you seemed like you were at a loss for words, despite them already being written for you – all you could do was smile as your muscle memory continued to play.
“~Goodness, gracious! Great balls of fire!~”
You played the last string of notes, your face dangerously close to Jake’s as the soft glow of the lanterns and phone flashlights illuminated his features almost angelically, the lights creating a halo around him and blurring the crowd like a camera focusing in on the subject of its image. His green eyes, though casted in a shadow, twinkled softly as he looked your face over like you were the only thing in the room – and to him, you were.
He was seeing the same thing. The blues of LEDs and the yellow of the lanterns created a harsh but gorgeous contrast on your face as your chest heaved when you attempted to catch your breath and the light sheen of sweat made your skin shine in a way he never thought about before. Your eyes were illuminated, but they held a shine of their own when you looked him over.
The cheers behind him all melded into one sound, one that Jake could confuse for his own heartbeat if it wasn’t pounding against his ribcage.
There was no hesitation this time as he pulled you close by the nape of your neck and pressed his lips to yours with breathless passion.
Your outside hand fisted in his Henley shirt, the fabric warm but a little rough under your fingertips. His heart was thumping rhythmically against your knuckles, giving the butterflies in your stomach a beat to dance to.
His hand moved down to the side of your neck, his thumb finding your pulse point. The sensation of your heartbeat under his fingertips was mesmerizing.
The kiss felt both like an eternity and not long enough when you finally pulled away, both of your lips damp and as your breath mixed as your foreheads rested against each other.
Around you, the crowd was still buzzing with energy, talking to each other as they started mingling again.
But you and Jake couldn’t hear them, not when you're so consumed with one another right there on the piano bench. You were in your own little world, a small sanctuary in the middle of the bar. Just you and him.
Smiling, you can’t stop the giggle from escaping as you try to smooth out where you had gripped his shirt. “That was um…”
“Electrifying?” Jake offered, his dimple appearing as he smirked playfully.
“That’s one way to put it, yeah,” you said with a light, slightly breathless laugh.
He chuckled and opened his mouth to say something else, but the overhead lights flickered for a split second before they stayed steady and the sound of the jukebox started up again.
You both sat up straight, looking around the bar as the patrons started back up in their games they abandoned.
“Would you look at that – one song and you managed to light up the whole bar, literally,” Jake said as he looked from his surroundings and then back to you, taking in how you smiled at everyone having fun again.
You hummed, turning your head with a playful glint in your eye, “Well, thank goodness it was only one song. I don’t know if I could’ve played another one. Unless Twinkle Twinkle Little Star counts.”
Jake laughed as he stood up, offering you a hand to pull you to your feet. “Well, if Nick was here, I’m pretty sure he would have a blast if you played that.”
“Oh, yeah, he definitely would,” you said with a laugh as you pushed some hair out of your face. “Another drink?”
He nodded, fluffing his shirt a little. “I can go for another.”
You grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bar, “Penny!”
After you got your drinks, you and Jake went to a booth by the windows.
“That was really impressive, Y/N. I knew Rooster was good, but he’s not that good,” Jake complimented as he sipped his fresh beer. The bitter liquid soothed his throat, his voice a little raw after singing.
You shrugged and sipped your Amaretto, the warm liquid warming you up from the chill of the rain outside. “I don’t know about that. He’s been playing since he was little. I started getting into piano in, like, middle school. And then in college I um.. I picked up a little guitar.”
Jake watched you bite your lip, your nails tapping against the glass of your drink. He wasn’t entirely sure what caused that far off look to appear in your eyes, a fogginess he wasn’t familiar with. But one thing he did recognize was that flicker of love, a shine of longing and admiration peaking through the fog – like a lighthouse on the shore.
He didn’t know much about Kendall, just what you had told him. He knew that you had met in college, you had been friends before you began dating, and that Kendall played the guitar – his favorite one tucked into the corner of Nick’s bedroom.
You cleared your throat, blinking the fogginess away and pulling Jake out of his thoughts.
You rubbed your hands on your jeans before resting your elbows on the table to talk with your hands, desperate to keep the conversation flowing.
“But like I was saying, Brad and I are very different when it comes to singing and playing the piano. He definitely channels our dad a little more than I do.”
He chuckled and leaned forward, resting his upper body on his forearms, “Well, I think I’m a little biased when it comes to that. But don’t sell yourself short, Darlin’, you put on quite the performance.” He added an unnecessary wink, but it didn’t stop you from smiling and looking at the table to hide your blush.
You lifted your head and smiled at him, sniffling just a little. “Thank you, Jake. That means a lot.”
Jake reached over and squeezed your hand, “Anytime.” He cleared his throat, “If you don’t mind me asking, that song clearly means a lot to you and Rooster, why-why is that?”
Tears stung your eyes a bit, again, but your smile didn’t falter. “Our dad, he um… he played it all the time. And I mean all the time. I’m surprised our mother stayed sane.” Jake reached up and wiped a tear that slipped through. You leaned into his warm palm slightly, as you continued.
“One of our last memories with him was sitting at the piano as he sang that song. Our mom in his lap singing with him without a care in the world about who was watching…” Your voice was a little heavier as you neared the end of your sentence, the memory making you a little emotional.
He smiled and squeezed your hand again, his thumb rubbing your knuckles, “That’s beautiful.” You gave him a soft smile and squeezed his hand back.
“Can I show you something?” He asked softly, not wanting to disturb the moment too much.
You nodded and sat up a little straighter, wiping your eyes as you spoke, “Of course.”
Jake nodded his head towards the window and your eyes followed the direction.
The glass was a little foggy, sweating as the cold temperature of the rain was meeting the warm air of the bar and the glass acting like a mediator between the two.
Your brow furrowed in immediate confusion though you weren’t going to question Jake just yet. There was certainly much more to it.
And he proved your suspicions by bringing his finger up to draw in the condensation.
It was a quick drawing, a simple sun with a smiley face and a little heart next to it. But the look on Jake’s face told you it was so much more than just a little doodle on a window.
“That’s really cute Jake,” you said softly, as you smile at him.
His grin widened and he shifted in his seat. “When I was little, I was never good with storms. My sister was even worse. She was scared and I was upset because I couldn’t go play in the rain.”
You couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up when he said that, the picture of a young Jake pouting in his room as he watched the rain out of his window in your head – he definitely picked out two droplets to race against each other, maybe even him and his sister picked one and had a competition.
He just smiled at you before continuing.
“My grandma and my mom had this routine with us where they would have us by the bay window in the living room and we would draw in the condensation. And I, of course, rubbed my wet hand on my sister’s face,” he said with a small chuckle.
“That I’m definitely not surprised by. Bradley pestered me too, still does, it’s a brother thing.”
Jake nodded, “Oh yeah, for sure. But aside from that, there was a purpose to why my mom and grandma had us do this. Because as you can see now-” He pointed to the drawing, seeing that it was already dripping and disappearing, more condensation taking its place. “-it’s already going away.”
Your brow furrowed in confusion. You still weren’t exactly sure where Jake was going, but it was clear this was something he held onto and cherished. Especially for him to bring it up now, years later. Plus, he had you roped in now, you were invested in this little smiling sun.
“The whole point of drawing in the fog was because it doesn’t last forever, and neither would the storm outside. Or any storm, really. As I got older, we stopped the window drawings, but my mom kept it up with us for little things. Like when my sister was going through a break up, she drew a sun with a little heart on a note and put it in her backpack. I can bet you that she still has every note, because I know I do.”
Tears pricked your eyes a little bit, “That’s really really beautiful, Jake. Your mom and grandma sound like very wise women.”
Jake nodded, a proud smile pulling at his lips, “They are, I’m lucky to have them.”
You mirrored his smile and you both went back to conversing with each other, planning out ideas for your next ‘not’ date.
“There’s so much to do here, so much it’s like there’s nothing,” you said, laughing as you sipped your drink.
You had listed off a lot of places to go nearby and all the things you could do together, but it all sounded so fun that you were having trouble deciding.
Jake nodded, rubbing his face a little as he laughed, “Yeah, seems like it.” He glanced around, noticing a pool table nearby. “Hey, how about we think on it some more later and just play a game of pool?”
You hummed a little and glanced over your shoulder at the pool table.
A sly smile came over your face as an idea popped into your mind.
You turned back to face him, biting your lip a little, “I um… wow this is embarrassing, I haven’t really ever played pool before.”
Jake squinted at you, almost analyzing you to see if you were just fucking with him. But you just played it up by hiding your face in your hands, hiding the grin that you knew would give you away if he spotted it.
“You’re serious? You’ve never played pool before?”
His tone was inquisitive, but it also had a laugh behind it that he was hiding as best he could and it almost had you laughing.
“No no, I have played before. But it’s just been too long. Last time I played it was maybe 10 years ago when I was in high school, and I was awful.”
Jake’s laugh finally broke through at that.
“Hey! Don’t laugh!” You whined, holding back giggles of your own.
He nodded, trying to stop himself by clearing his throat. “You’re right, you’re right. It’s not funny. It’s… it’s kinda sad actually.”
You dropped your jaw and reached over the table to swat at his shoulder. “Oh shut up!”
He chuckled as he dodged your hand, and you couldn’t help but smile as the corners of his eyes crinkled and his dimples poked through. “Okay okay, I’m sorry. But c'mon let’s play at least one game,” he proposed as he slid out of the booth and stood. He offered you his hand, a wink accompanying his next words, “And I promise I’ll go easy on you.”
You rolled your eyes and took his hand, “Fine, one game.”
A victorious grin crossed Jake’s face as he pulled you to your feet, squeezing your hand as he turned and pulled you to the table. Your lips pulled up in a similar fashion as you stumbled a little when he drug you behind him.
“Okay,” he said as he came to stop at the pool table. “I don’t have to explain the rules, do I?” His brow arched with his question, only using it to further his teasing. You rolled your eyes, hand going on your hip, “No, I know that much, Seresin.” The sass in your tone made Jake laugh, “Alright, Bradshaw, let’s play.”
You nodded and grabbed the two pool cues, “Let’s.”
He chuckled and shook his head playfully as he quickly racked the pool balls. Once they were all in order, he took the triangle off and tossed it on a table as he walked over to you.
His fingers wrapped around the taller cue, his warm hand encapsulating yours.
How had you not realized how large his hand was until now?
“Y/N?”
You shook your head, not having realized that you froze, “Oh um, sorry, sorry.” You let go of the pool cue, clearing your throat as you pushed some hair behind your ear. He chuckled at your sudden shyness, “It’s alright, darlin’. It’s cute when you get all blushy.” You huffed, though a smile pulled at your lips as you shoved his shoulder.
Jake laughed and held his hands up in defense, only slightly jostled by your shove. He gestured to the table and grabbed the cue ball, “Okay, okay, you wanna break?” He punctuated his question by putting the ball on the table with a *clack*.
You bit your lip, still feigning nervousness as best you could. You nodded and walked around to the end of the table beside him.
Tossing the cue up and catching it lower, you leaned over and nearly fell into muscle memory – letting the end come down and rest easy in the dip between your thumb and pointer finger.
You rolled your shoulders a little bit, moving your hand much lower on the stick so you would have less control of the cue. You relaxed your shoulders, letting them drop as your right hand tightened its grip. The maple cue rested on the walnut of the table, using it as the support for the middle of the stick.
Jake tilted his head, taking in your posture. It was… unconventional, and maybe a little awkward. But he wasn’t going to step in just yet, because maybe that stance just worked for you. And the look of concentration on your face was just too cute for him to interrupt.
Much like earlier at the dart board, your brow furrowed and your tongue poked out from between your lips. Jake grinned at the sight, and he couldn’t help but wonder if Nick made the same face when he focused on something. Like if his nose crinkled like yours did when he colored or if he stuck his tongue out when he did a puzzle.
Then his mind wandered a little further.
The image of a little girl appeared in his head, basically a clone of you in your lap as you sat at the piano. You guiding her hand along the keys, then having her repeat the order on her own. Her tongue sticking out as she tries to remember.
But before he can fantasize any longer, he shakes himself out of it once you take your shot.
He watched the tip of the cue whiff the ball as the butt nearly became perpendicular to the floor. “Woah there!”
You covered your mouth with your hand, doing your best to feign embarrassment at your ‘failure’. “Oh.. my.. gosh.. I can’t believe that just happened,” you snorted, laughing at yourself as you looked up at the ceiling, hoping that a blush was covering your cheeks to really sell it.
Jake came over to stand next to you, chuckling just a little. “So um… is that how you held it in high school?” He leaned against the table, the cue snug against his side as he crossed his arms, looking down at his boots as he crossed his ankles before looking up at your profile.
You swallowed as you kept your eyes on the ceiling, and Jake couldn’t help but watch the column of your throat move with the action.
Sighing, you looked at him, “I mean, kinda, like I said, it’s been awhile. But that felt so wrong.” You looked away from him and focused on your cue. “And now I’m embarrassed… because you just saw that.”
He sighed gently, a smile pulling at his lips. While you were embarrassed, he couldn’t help but admire the blush on your skin. He didn’t like the reason, because you shouldn’t be embarrassed, but you looked cute.
He reached out and turned your head to face him, smiling softly at you. “Hey, you don’t have to be embarrassed. It happens, and I guarantee that is not the worst shot I’ve seen.”
“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”
He sighed and propped his cue against the wall, “C’mere.” He adjusted the cue ball again and gently pulled you to him when you hesitated to move closer. “I don’t bite, unless you ask,” he whispered the last half of that in your ear, his accent slightly thicker as you felt his lips curl into a smile against the lobe of your ear.
His warm breath raised goosebumps on the skin of your neck, a shiver going down the nerves of your spine. He chuckled, his chest rumbling against your shoulder and making you giggle as a genuine flush covered your face and neck.
“Okay,” Jake said, turning you gently so your back settled against his chest. His hand rested on your hip and everything just felt right. Both of you slotted together like a puzzle piece, it was comfortable.
He looked down at you, “Am I too close?”
Your head shook almost embarrassingly quickly. If anything he wasn’t close enough.
“No no, you’re okay.”
He nodded, smiling at you, “Alright, just let me know, okay?” You swallowed, nodding back, “I will.”
“Alright, now, I’m gonna show you how to properly hold a pool stick. Do what you were doing before.”
You nodded, bending back over and mimicking the stance you had done previously.
Jake looked at you gaging what to adjust. “Okay, so one issue is, your back hand is too low. Don’t shake hands with the bumper.” He took your wrist and tried to slide your hand up but it barely moved. “And you don’t need a death grip on it, it’s not going anywhere unless you move it.” You nodded and relaxed your grip to let him adjust your hand placement.
He moved it to about the middle of the weight and watched your guiding hand adjust itself to a bit more of a natural position.
Smiling, he glanced down at you, “There we go, how does that feel?” You nodded, “A lot better, definitely more comfortable.”
“Perfect, and that’s how you know you’re doing it right. Before you were uncomfortable and it threw off your control. You guide the cue, it doesn’t guide you.”
You snorted a little, hanging your head as you laughed, “You sound like a therapist, or a yoga instructor.” Jake laughed along with you, “Unfortunately I’m neither of those. Not qualified nor flexible enough.”
You arched a brow and looked at him over your shoulder, a cheeky smile on your lips, “Not flexible enough? Oh, that’s a shame.” His eyebrows raised, almost as if he was sizing up a challenge, “Oh is it now? I mean, I’m sure with enough stretching, I’ll be good to go.”
You laughed before shaking your head, “Okay okay, let’s stay on task, Lieutenant, yeah?”
“Right, right, of course.”
Jake cleared his throat as his fingers wrapped around your shoulders, “Okay, being relaxed is fine. But you’re too loose and that makes it awkward.” He slowly pulled them out from their slouched position, straightening your back a little in the process. “That’s better.”
You swallowed a little, the heat of his chest against your back making you both nervous and excited.
“Do you feel more in control?” You nodded at his question, not trusting your voice to be steady. “Good, now, let’s test this.”
Worry shot through you for a moment, afraid he might step back and let you do this on your own – squashing the mini fantasy that you created.
But your worry was smothered when Jake adjusted his own stance, his knees nudging the backs of your thighs. His right hand encased your own as his left hand acted as a stand for yours – keeping your guiding hand steady.
“Loosen your grip, Duckie. It’s not gonna change your power. In pool, the speed determines the power.”
Jake’s voice was steady, but it was raspy as he spoke in your ear again. His breath fanned along your ear lobe and your jaw, raising goosebumps once again.
He felt your wrist and hand relax a little, and he just hoped you couldn’t feel his heart beating against your back.
“Alright, there we go. Now, all you gotta do is bring it back and–”
His sentence fell short as the felt tip collided with the cue ball and he felt a vibrating sensation against his hip.
“See? So much better. And now, if that’s your phone in your pocket, I think you’re getting a call.”
He stepped back and let you stand straight as you pulled your phone out.
Your heart dropped slightly when you saw Serenity’s contact flash across your screen.
Did something happen to Nick? Was he okay? Did something happen to the house? What went wrong?
Jake must have noticed that your face changed on dime, because his face fell into one of concern. “Y/N? What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”
Was it Serenity? Was it Bradley? Was it a chaplain? Or hell an NCIS agent?
“It’s Serenity,” you said as you pressed the green answer button and brought the phone to your ear. “Hey Ren, what’s up?”
Jake sighed in relief, his worst thoughts going off to the wayside in favor of just worried thoughts.
You brought your hand up, chewing on the edges of your nails as she spoke.
“Hey, Y/N, everything’s okay–”
Jake watched your body visibly relax, your hand rubbing at your mouth much like he’d seen Bradley do when he was stressed.
“Nicky’s okay? Nothing’s on fire?”
“No, nothing’s on fire. But Nicky is not wanting to go to bed without you here. I think it's the rain, the storm I should say. He doesn’t want to go to his room. Won’t even get up off the couch.”
You sighed but nodded, “Okay, I’ll be there in a little bit. Get his turtle and his manta ray, then get my body spray and lightly spritz a blanket and let him curl up on the couch until I get there.”
“I’m so sorry Y/N, I know you wanted to have a fun night out… I just didn’t know what to do.”
“Don’t apologize, I’m glad you called. I’ll be home in a little bit.”
You hung up and looked at Jake, “I’m so sorry, Jake. Nicky is–”
He held his hand up, “Nope, no apologies, go be with your baby. We can meet up later. Tell Nicky I said ‘hi’.”
Your heart skipped a few beats as you smiled at him. He smiled back and nodded towards the front door, “Now go Mother Goose, you got a duckling waiting on you.”
The look in his eyes was nothing short of fond, the yellow overhead lighting making his eyes a comforting shade of green.
He wasn’t upset at all, no disdain for your sudden departure on his features. Was he disappointed? Yeah, but you were always going to be a mother first. He couldn’t and would never get in the way of that, or try to change it.
You hugged him, and he didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around your waist in reciprocation.
“Thank you,” you kissed his cheek in thanks as you pulled away from the hug. “You don’t have to thank me, Darlin’. Just text me or call me when you get home safe, okay?” He said with a smile, gently squeezing your shoulders.
You nodded, matching his smile, “Of course, as long as you do the same?” He winked, “You got it.”
He grabbed your purse for you, “Drive safe, Sweetheart.” You nodded, “I will. Bye Jake.” “Bye Y/N.”
You smiled at him again before going over to the bar, patting the top with the palm of your hand. You opened your mouth to get Penny’s attention but she was already smiling at you. “Heading out?” Your head tilted as you nodded, “Yeah, how’d you know?” She shrugged, nodding down to the bag hanging off your shoulder, “Lucky guess.”
Chuckling, you pulled your wallet out, “Nicky won’t go to bed, the storm is keeping him up.” You pulled out a fifty, “For my drinks and Jake’s, the rest is your tip.” Penny shook her head, pushing the money back towards you, “That’s way too much, Duckie. 25 is plenty. Plus, Jake’s tab is open and your drinks are on it.”
“Penny Benjamin–”
“Y/N Bradshaw, don’t argue and go home to your son,” Penny pointed to the door to punctuate her order, the damp towel swaying slightly from her movement.
Huffing out a ‘fine’, you put the fifty away and put a ten on the bar, “I’m still tipping you, because I love you. Not as much as you deserve, but you’re gonna fight me on it.” She smiled gratefully at you, taking the bill, “Thank you, now go home. Text me when you get there.”
You patted the bar again, “Yes, ma’am. I’ll see you later, don’t let Jake get too drunk.”
With that you walked to the door, though Penny stopped you with a shout.
“That was an Oscar worthy performance by the way!”
You rolled your eyes, waving to her as you slipped your jacket on, “Bye Penny!”
phew!
that was a long one huh? but hey, we finally got a kiss! they kissed!! and before hand we got a little peak into duckie's insecurities as a mom. though we can all agree she's pretty great right?
i hope you guys liked this chapter and are ready to see where the next chapter takes duckie, nicky, and jake!
hi darlings i know it's been a long time, too long, but like i said before -- i wanted to make sure this was a chapter i was proud of and lately my creative battery just wouldn't behave and it's been hard to write and like what i write. but i think... i think i did it here.
my ducklings <33:
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Hey! Then in hoo it is mentioned that Leo has dealt with a lot of bullies and horrible people since Esperanza died, I could ask for something like him and his s/o going to do something normal like shopping and end up running into one of these people And they keep making fun of Leo so his s/o defends him and comforts him or something like that(sorry if it seems confusing, English is not my first language haha)
first of all your english is great babes!! not confusing at all <33
ah yes. the bitchy girls. the asshole mean girls who have a fucking superpower for sniffing out adhd and autism and other neurodivergent traits like fucking blood hounds. the devils in lululemon leggings and nike sneakers who worship the ground hailey bieber walks on and keep their marc jacobs tote bags full of knives to stab anyone and everyone in the back with the moment the see an opportunity to.
those girls.
Leo's been able to avoid them for a while. Drew was the worst at camp, but she was a watered down version of them - Leo realized at some point that Drew adopting those traits was her own way of dealing with shit, and the more time she spent at camp since Piper became head of cabin, the more chilled out she's gotten.
There were barely any mean girls at MIT, none he had trouble avoiding at least. But now he's here, back in the real world, shopping for groceries for your little apartment you have together. And in the real world, fresh out of nursing school, is Emily. The exact same Emily from the school he went to before camp half blood. At 15, Leo went through a lot of shit. School was hell, his foster family was so bad he ran away enough to be sent to the wilderness school, and he was at one of the lowest points of his entire life.
You don't know who she is, but from the look on Leo's face, the sudden, sharp drop in his energy, the way he starts picking at his hands and gets all jittery. He hopes he can get away with it, hopes she won't even recognize him.
"Oh my god... Leo Valdez?"
you grimace at her voice, the way she mispronounces his last name, and your hackles rise. She looks at you in shock, seeming to hold back a laugh.
"Wait, is he your boyfriend?"
She says it like it's some joke, like this whole thing is hilarious.
"He used to be so awkward!" she giggles, "Wow, you look exactly the same."
Leo can read you like a book, and he knows you are SO pissed off for him.
"Yeah," You say with an equally sarcastic smile, "I had no idea you guys were the same age, you look so much older. I never would have known you guys were in the same class."
She blanches a little, and you double down.
"Leo actually just graduated top of his class at MIT. He has, like, a dozen job offers already." You smile at him proudly. "So how about you, are you... doing anything?"
"Mhm." She nods, the humor suddenly gone. "Nursing school. I just started."
"Oh," you nod, glancing over at Leo and sharing a subtle look with him, "well, we better get going, we have some open houses to get to."
As you walk away, still close enough for her to hear, you mutter to Leo, stifling a smile.
"Wow. The mean girl to nursing school pipeline is real." You chuckle, "And like, she does know it's not 2016 anymore, right? Cause her eyebrows don't seem to..."
He's so surprised that after an interaction with her, after all these years, he actually feels... okay. Outside the shithole of high school, with you by his side, she doesn't seem nearly as intimidating as she had. He's not sure how you got him to realize that so quickly, but he realizes that there's nothing that feels that intimidating when you're by his side. And you're right, her eyebrows are just as awful as her personality.
#drabbles#leo valdez#leo valdez drabbles#leo valdez x reader#heroes of olympus#heroes of olympus x reader#heroes of olympus drabbles#no shade to anyone who does/still likes 2016 makeup and eyebrows /gen#and no shade to anyone in nursing school /gen#just using some small town mean girl archtypes yk#anyway yeah#once you break down that facade#leo is SO unthreatened#and he is forever grateful to you
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How would the assassins react to meeting amazons?
https://www.washingtonpost.com/science/2019/12/31/amazons-were-long-considered-myth-these-discoveries-show-warrior-women-were-real/
(As usual I’m only adding the main games and I’m counting the Hidden Ones. Also, Basim isn’t here because I haven’t played Mirage yet)
Altaïr:
I mean… he has a thing for women who can fight when you consider Adha and Maria. Not counting the whole “what sorcery is this?” moment of his when he first met Maria which can be seen as him being too surprised by how he had been fooled by Maria into thinking she’s Robert de Sablé, we can safely say that Altaïr would give them the respect he believes they deserve. Of course, if this is post-Altaïr Chronicles + pre-AC1, then he’ll treat them the way he treats everyone, in that same arrogant “I know I’m better than you” kind of way. But, hey, at least, he treats everyone equally.
Ezio:
He’d most definitely be respectful although, if anyone was going to flirt with him, he’ll flirt back. Nothing serious though, he’s most probably there for a mission and he’s old enough to know when to prioritize. After the mission though, well, what he does in his free time is not any of the Brotherhood’s business as long as it doesn’t go against the Creed and the tenets.
Ratonhnhaké:ton:
He does not see why this is surprising. He was raised by a mother who was also a warrior. His grandmother is the leader of their clan. He doesn’t get why others are surprised.
Edward:
After the Mary reveal? Edward is at the realm of “Nothing surprises me anymore about women. I don’t know women, I will never understand women so this? This isn’t surprising me at all” all the while actually being just a bit surprised because of his upbringing. But he’s not showing it.
Arno:
… I mean… They’d remind him of his lost love, that’s for sure. Depending on how much time has passed, this might make Arno maudlin or he would look at them with a small smile that is both fond and also sad. It won’t stop him from doing his mission but he’d definitely feel some kind of bittersweet emotion whenever he thinks they do something Élise would have done.
Evie and Jacob:
Jacob would look at them for a moment before joking, “Looks like we found your homeland, Evie.”
And Evie would immediately counter with a dry “Oh good, I always knew I was adopted.”
Jayadeep is behind them, trying his best not to get swept up by their conversation to say “you’re twins” because he knew that he would lose if he did that.
Bayek:
I mean, Bayek fell in love with Aya. He would give these women the respect they deserve as warriors.
#considering some of them have proactive love interest#they won’t necessarily be surprised#sure maybe some of them would be#but they’d be polite about it#because most probably they’re there for a mission#and they need the locals’ assistance#ask and answer#assassin's creed#altaïr ibn la'ahad#ezio auditore#ratonhnhaké:ton#connor kenway#edward kenway#arno dorian#evie frye#jacob frye#bayek of siwa
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Do you think Louis in Dubai already knows about Armand's role in what happens to Claudia? It would explain why he doesn't correct Armand when he says he never harmed him. I've seen so many contradictory theories about that but I believe their relationship is real, it's just not fully honest.
Hi Anon! That's the million dollar question, isn't it? We don't really have a definitive answer but for my part, I think Louis already knows. I'd much prefer if the show stuck to that bit of book canon.
IMO it makes for more interesting storytelling than to have some cheap dramatic reveal at the end where *gasp, [cue young & the restless music ♫] Louis ✨uncovers a treacherous betrayal✨ after living with the ♥︎love of his life™ for nearly 80 years. Shock and horror!!! What will Louis do next? Tune in on Sunday to find out...
I know Armand is one of, if not the, most powerful mind gift wielder but even he couldn't possibly maintain such a massive lie for that long. Especially not when he and Louis regularly exchange blood.
And as I've said so many times before, Interview With The Vampire is Louis' story and it's about him trying to come to terms with his own mistakes and how they contribute to the tragedies he suffers. Like almost all the books in the chronicles, It's more about internal conflict than about some external evil that the 'hero' must defeat to save the day and get the girl. Jacob sums it up perfectly in his recent Newsweek interview where he says;
❝ I think this season is quite a confronting at what happens when you really dig into your own culpability to things that that you felt you were the victim in or ways that you felt were wronged. And how much did you play a part in both fronts and responsibility you're really willing to take for your own actions and the way that you manifested your thoughts and feelings?Louis is way more powerful than he would ever admit, he is way more responsible for the tragedy of his own life than he would ever admit. ❞
I've seen some hints here and there about the angle the show might approach it from. For example, Armand and Santiago's official character bios which I find very interesting;
This suggests they will initially paint Santiago as the sole villain and Armand as a helpless spectator (I could not prevent it and all that)
But ultimately, I think it's crucial to the story that Louis knows the truth AND chooses to stay with Armand anyway. In the same way he says yes to Lestat's marriage proposal in the church, after witnessing him go on a murder rampage. In the same way he invites Lestat back into their home after Lestat beats him to a pulp and nearly kills him in episode 5, and then tells Claudia to "do better" when she's less than thrilled about it. In the same way, he can't bring himself to burn Lestat in episode 7, even while knowing it puts Claudia in potential future danger if Lestat were to come after them—which btw, he does and his testimony is ultimately what seals her fate.
I could go on and on but the point is that Louis is a complex and flawed character, whose desires and self-imposed morality are completely at odds. I think this season will be all about revealing just how flawed Louis is and I for one cannot wait to see all of it.
And no, unlike 'some people', it's not because I need Louis to be revealed as an evil liar because then it 'puts him on an equal level with Lestat and so Lestat's not so bad. 🤡 It's because just like Jacob says, I believe we need to allow space for black and brown characters to also be complex, flawed and even problematic at times. Let's be monsters and enjoy it! That's what makes for good representation and that's what makes for interesting storytelling. And don't worry Jacob, I'll still love Louis at the end no matter what he does! ♥︎
#ask#iwtv season 2#iwtv amc#iwtv#louis de pointe du lac#jacob anderson#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire
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This is unrelated to anything, but my favorite thing about Carlisle is that whatever Edward tells Bella/the reader about him is wrong in every way. Like, Edward thinks he’s damned so the implication is that Carlisle, a former priest, thinks the same and encourages Edward to believe that, but this is disputed in New Moon. In Breaking Dawn, Edward is convinced that Carlisle would forcibly abort Bella’s baby if it weren’t for Rosalie, but Carlisle confirms he would never do such a thing to Jacob.
Even when Edward shares details of their backstories, he just glosses over crucial information pertaining to Carlisle and it is so funny. Edward mentions Carlisle spent a few decades with the Volturi and this is treated like it’s nothing. Edward completely cuts Elizabeth out of the story, making it seem like Carlisle chose him because he thought he was special, and we only learn about Elizabeth from Carlisle himself. Granted, this could be because SMeyer didn’t come up with that until New Moon, but it does make me reevaluate Edward’s testimony on… anything. I know human memories are blurry to vampires, but they’re not erased like Alice’s were because she was subjected to brain injury inducing electroshock therapy. So it feels like Edward’s exclusion of Elizabeth was deliberate. Lastly, Edward’s disdain for human-blood-drinking vampires and his assumption that his family has equal disregard for them is especially ironic when all of those human-blood-drinking vampires who come to the Cullens’ aid in Breaking Dawn are Carlisle’s besties.
It makes me question Edward’s thoughts on everything, and I feel like the fandom takes a lot of what he says as absolute truth (such as Rosalie being meant for him or Rosalie wanting Bella to die so she could raise the baby) because he’s a mind reader, but his perception and misunderstanding of Carlisle, his beloved father and oldest companion, throws that out the window.
Oh yes, this! I used to say "Edward is not a good storyteller" because he leaves out crucial details all the time. And whether that's a conscious choice on his part to leave things out or he's Just a Teenager who makes himself the focus of everything, I don't know. (Or, as you suggest, that SM didn't flesh out the stories until later so Edward was giving accurate information in the moment but the stories changed).
The other two examples are Esme and Rosalie's backstories, too. With Esme, he makes it sound like, again, Carlisle just found this random dying person and chose to save her; he completely leaves out they had met before. And with Rosalie he makes it sound like the only reason Carlisle 'saved' her was so Edward could have a girlfriend. But when you hear the story from Rosalie's POV it's not like that, and ROSALIE of all people would not be trying to paint Carlisle in a more positive light, so I trust her more. Rosalie talks about hearing him say how terrible what happened to her was, how he couldn't just leave her, what a waste of a young life, etc and that she was free to go off on her own if that's what she wanted. Absolutely nothing about matchmaking or suggesting they get together. Even the guide says it was in 'the back of his mind' and while "omg this poor girl, I can't leave her here, and hey maybe she and Edward will hit it off if she decides to stay with us" isn't super great, it's not nearly so creepy as "here Edward, I found a wife for you" as Edward sort of implies.
And I do often see fandom/fanfic taking Edward's word for it; Carlisle gets a lot of flack for 'changing Rosalie for Edward' and being willing to abort Bella's pregnancy against her will, but when those incidents are seen from the POV's of other characters, Edward's understanding of those moments is called into question.
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Oor - September 2004, Interview with Richard
Three years after Mutter, Rammstein comes back with Reise, Reise with a more human sound. Guitarist Richard Kruspe explains why open laughter is allowed.
Has Rammstein gone soft with Reise, Reise? Not exactly given the criticism of first singe Mein Teil and the accompanying video clip. But the Berlin group has certainly changed. Look at those pictures. The militaristic and post-apocalyptic poses have given way to a more comical image. They have shot a few more series: at the edge of a swimming pool, on the beach, in the sauna and in a bullfighting arena. And listen to Amerika, and Amore, and Reise Reise’s title track. They are accessible and infectious tracks with a victim (see box). Self-awareness Richard Kruspe calls it. In 2004, Rammstein dares to take a step back from himself.
Los is Kruspe's favorite new song. It is also the clearest thing that Reise, Reise is a different album than Sehnsucht (1997) and Mutter (2001). Kruspe wrote it for Mutter, but it was shelved until they decided to play the riff acoustically. "It's not what you would expect from a German band, especially not from this German band. It is a simple, AC/DC-like riff, which gives a bluesy feeling when played acoustically. It's unlike anything we've done before," says Kruspe. And yet Rammstein, unmistakably.
“We decided that a few things had to be changed when making this album. For me personally, this first and foremost meant that work had to be less tense. Previously, the aggression in the music was paramount and the mutual friction in the band was also an important factor in the recording process. This time we consciously tried to leave the egos outside the door more. Give each other a little more space. And I think that's why this album sounds a bit more human than its predecessors. We used fewer machines, which was also a goal in itself. The live feeling had to be there. No more having to figure out our own songs afterwards, because we've been cutting and pasting too much.
We used to be more on each other's skin because… everyone had their hang-ups and because in a band with six people you just have clashing characters. Rammstein has no leader. All six of us are equal, which means that each of us fights for his place and there are sometimes endless discussions. That causes problems. In fact, it can lead to major crises. At the time of Mutter I had very clear ideas about how the music should and should not sound. I was pretty rigid about that, but luckily at some point I realized I had to let go of that and see the whole picture — a dynamic six-man group. It was a particularly intense period, in which I finally decided to live in New York, I literally had to distance myself.”
Kruspe was not alone in struggling with his place in the democratic whole that is Rammstein. Each band member has opted for a form of self-therapy.
"Of course it's quite a bit. Over the years you get a certain vision of your work and your music, which does not necessarily correspond to that of the five others. Just deal with that. When I once started the project — because Rammstein was a project, I didn't have a permanent band in mind — my starting point was that I wanted to work with similar musicians. Everyone has the same input. It has remained that way and gradually no one has ever allowed himself to be commanded by another. Maareh… There is always a kind of chemistry between people. Men, women, it doesn't matter. With the six of us, that chemistry is quite explosive.”
This means that Rammstein is standing at the mixing desk in the studio. "You! More bass! More guitar! More drums! That's really how it goes. That's why we also need a producer [for Reise, Reise was just like on the three previous studio albums Jacob Hellner]. He gets twenty, thirty percent more out of the songs. And the work would never get done otherwise. What we do notice, now, after ten years, is that some of us have become less fanatical. Not everyone has an opinion on every aspect of music. Can't either. But to admit that you have to turn off your ego. Well, that has now happened. For the new album we wrote more as a band. That is different from before and that is important, because when you write as a band, it is easier to discuss. »
Kruspe does not discuss the lyrics: “Till actually writes poems, not lyrics. Sometimes they fit, sometimes they don't. That is simple. Some of his poems have nothing to do with my feelings, but have such a strong story that I can go along with it completely. It helps that I've known Till for about eighteen years. I know where a text like Stein um Stein comes from. A man who bricks up his wife because he doesn't want to lose her. The biggest problem for a human being is letting go. That even plays a role in Mein Teil. To give things away, to renounce, to distance myself. Very difficult: Such a theme means that I can identify with that text. That's enough.”
A project, then, was Rammstein initially. Kruspe once shared a flat with Oliver Riedel and Christoph Schneider. Together they began to develop musical ideas, without any suspicion of worldwide success. Second guitarist Paul Landers, Till Lindemann and keyboardist Christian 'Flake' Lorenz later joined them; the latter only under the necessary pressure.
Kruspe: “With Mutter, Rammstein has made a big leap, especially in Europe. We have become a stadium band. But we never thought about any success. It started with an idea. We wanted to try everything. Success or no success, grow big or stay small, that did not occur to us. A band has its own dynamics, which you cannot plan. When we got success that was nice, but what do you do with it? A man must follow his intuition. Even if after ten years you are no longer as free as when you started, you should still try to keep working from a certain naivety. Switch back to the time when you were open-minded about your music. It was Picasso who said later in life that it would take him all his life to paint like a child again. That's it: learn everything and forget it again. We try and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Of course you can't take it too literally, because you grow as a person and you are always influenced by new things. But it is a good starting point.”
That said, Rammstein is not enough for any of the members to fully satisfy creativity. Kruspe doesn't want to limit himself, so he puts some of the music he writes aside for other projects. “New York helps me with that. When I'm there, I'm not so overpop Rammstein. And that makes it easier for me to write and play. In a sense, I've already put this album behind me and I'm working on new ideas. I'm working on now… I can't say too much about it. Not a band, but a nice project that will interest people.”
Reise Reise’s second single, is Amerika, with the irresistibly jolly chorus 'We’re all living in Amerika, Amerika ist wunderbar' (later it becomes 'We're all living in Amerika, Coca-Cola, Wonderbra').
“The claim that Germans have no humor is outdated. Germany has become self-aware in the last decade — and humor comes when one develops self-awareness. Amerika comes directly from our band humor. It's not a political statement, we don't do that.
I believe that everything in life should be in balance. You don't eat a whole cake, a piece is enough. A look at America shows us that there is a lot out of balance there. America controls the whole world and that is a bit too much. But it's not a black and white story. It is also the people themselves, in the US and abroad. I remember the first time I drank Coca-Cola. Dude, that was cool. It tasted good, it felt good, the marketing of that brand worked perfectly for me. Isn't that nice? It's just well done. Now I know how much sugar is in it, how bad it is for you. I make a choice. Anyone can do that. Coca-Cola, Hollywood… It doesn't take that much effort to look beyond that.”
Rammstein made his breakthrough in America with Sehnsucht. David Lynch used the group in his movie Lost Highway and a Lollapalooza tour did the rest. Kruspe: “I think that the theme and the visualization of Sehnsucht came at just the right time for many American young people. However, in America everything moves very quickly. You can suddenly be successful, but you can also forget it in no time. An American band therefore has to tour endlessly, visit radio shows, make a noise. As a German band that is impossible, because you already put a lot of energy into your own country and Europe. When we toured for Mutter, we found that we simply had no strength left to restart the whole story in America as well. Plus, after September 11, 2001, America took a much more restrained attitude towards foreign groups. Patriotism was rampant, even when it came to pop music. Now it could come again. Rammstein has a certain cult status. Rammstein is cool, you know. And in Germany it helps if you prove yourself in the US. They look at you differently. America remains the largest music market; if you grow up in Europe, you want to go there. Not for the music itself. Interesting trends and developments have long ceased to come from the States.”
At the time of their first album Herzeleid (1995), Rammstein was a band from 'the former East Berlin'. Today those words hardly have any value. Kruspe has seen Berlin change. West Berlin was a different world. The capital of darkness. A dark, depressive atmosphere. “When I ended up there, I didn't feel comfortable at all. [Kruspe fled east to west via Hungary and Austria shortly before the fall of the wall.] Yes, West Berlin was substantially Easier than East Berlin. Now you can also find a lot of merriment in the city. East and West have drawn together and that gloom that David Bowie, Iggy Pop and Nick Cave deliberately sought out is largely a thing of the past. I am someone who quickly feels at home somewhere. Not in the sense of family or friends, but in a general sense. In New York it is easy to get to know people, but it is very difficult to make friends. The city has so much energy, which I don't feel in Berlin. In New York, capital of the world, you want to go out and feel part of something bigger, of a whole. You feel lonely in your apartment. In Berlin, the capital of Germany, the situation is reversed. There you feel lonely when you walk on the street and it is nice to be at home. Now I still fly back and forth. A month here, a month there, so I can't say I feel completely at home in New York yet. I am someone who tries to live intuitively. I went from the countryside to the Berlin suburbs, then to Berlin itself, now to New York… I am a wanderer. After 25 years in and around Berlin, I also feel the call of other places.”
Back to Los for a moment. What sets that song apart from the rest of Rammstein's repertoire is the primal feeling that emanates from that acoustic riff. For once no associations with drinking and sea shanties, but American roots. Still, Kruspe says, "I've never been a fan of American rock culture. I liked English hard rock much more than American hard rock. Only with bands like Faith No More and 24-7 Spyz did I start listening to Americans. Metal itself bored me. The aggression of Metallica, for example, appealed to me, but I went more for the melodies of Judas Priest. What do I find nice Americans now? Queens Of The Stone Age. Dave Grohl. But I listen more to the latest Killing Joke, or the Cure.
My own guitar sound is very metal. Why? Well, why do men prefer to ride a Harley… A metal guitar wall is the best thing there is. I get rid of my inner aggression with it. But you won't see me fiddling for hours on all kinds of guitar loops, I find that boring. I once studied guitar for a year or two to get better, but don't ask me about my guitar heroes. I find Depeche Mode's Martin Gore infinitely more inspiring than any guitarist.”
#Rammstein#Richard Kruspe#Till Lindemann#Paul Landers#Flake#Christoph Schneider#Oliver Riedel#interview#translation#2004#*scans
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Food for thought but here's an interesting video about the psychology of the trinity and I'm curious as to what your thoughts on this and how Gege might be applying this in JJK considering the concept of threes is arguably prevalent in the series.
https://youtu.be/LAR6FPBPbmA?si=61IoNkA2M7w8dPIb
ohoho anon. I even made a little diagram about it that I just absolutely have to share because the brainrot was so good.
This is the thing, maybe this amounts to something, maybe it doesn't, but these are the things my nerdy brain lives for in jjk. ESPECIALLY because they show Gege's level of metaphorical thinking.
I remember this one time this jjk anti told me "I am sure Gege does his research, but jjk is not that deep". Bro... this isn't research, this is deep understanding of the dynamics of the psyche.
Anyways, Analytical Psychology in jjk under the cut'o.
In fact... MBTI anon, this one might be for you... I'd be curious to read your thoughts.
God I missed using that meme.
First things first. Max Derrat! YES. I've only seen a few of his videos, but what I've seen has always been very, very interesting stuff. Guess how I found him?
Dun dun dun...
Jacob's Ladder.
I WILL NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT THIS MOVIE.
So, anyone reading this, go watch the movie and the yt video shared by anon if interested. The movie is a mindfuck, my favorite kind.
About the video...
TLDW; Max basically talks about why the number 3 is considered a sacred number in numerology. For example, Max argues that we often see Gods that come in triads (i.e. Zeus and his brothers Neptune and Hades), but argues that 4 is actually a number of wholeness.
I had rambled about numerology and the significance of 3 and 4 before here. But here's the text again (context: mind = body = soul in jjk as representing the 3 major clans):
Thing is, we are ideally meant to think of it as if this holy trinity (3) makes up one whole together (4). This "whole" is called the Self in Jungian terms, and it is thought to be the entirety of our existence (mind (includes the shadow) + body + soul).
Also, from a numerology and esoteric standpoint, you also want to consider that four (the Self) symbolizes stability and order, where three (mind + body + soul) is harmonious but not balanced.
But I really like that Max brought up the Kabbalistic tree of life for his example of why 4 = wholeness. I'm not going to go into all that tho. Suffice it to say he brings up Jung's Answer to Job, which I have not finished reading, but I understand the book is basically Jung rambling about why God is basically an asshole.
Don't quote me on this.
Part of the conclusion that Jung came to is that if God (1) represents "good" then he is not omnipotent because there is an opposite energy to "good", and that is "evil", or Satan (2).
Now, Max talks about how the Holy Trinity (3) represents aspects of God (or something like that), but that Satan, who is on an equal level as God (because good vs evil are opposing energies), got pushed into the shadow (4).
Again, Max does a much better job at explaining how this works, but the whole thing totally reminded me of Jungian typology.
Excuse the chicken scratch.
In the diagram above, you can replace mind (spirit), body (the son), soul (the Father) and (?) with one of the functions from the MBTI.
Mind you, I haven't studied Jungian typology in depth, and I am totally not well-versed on MBTI typology. But the gist of it is that there's 4 functions thinking, feeling, sensation, and intuition. For one reason or another, one becomes dominant, two support the dominant one, and a 4th one is underdeveloped or pushed into the shadow.
You see the pattern?
This is where we come to jjk and the one who might "emerge from the darkness, blacker than darkness. [And] purify that which is impure."
Jujutsu Kaisen
Now. I don't have the most coherent thoughts on the topic tbh. Everything is kind of a bunch of ideas floating around that I'm having a hard time grounding.
But I think of particular interest is the idea of the bath's goal being "being near evil."
But in the original Japanese text, the kanji Ura Ume uses is the kanji for devil/demon, not evil. You know, the function that got pushed into the shadow.
魔
So there's defo something here pointing at the need for wholeness and for bringing the contents of the shadow into consciousness in order to achieve said wholeness.
And what is in the deepest depths of the shadow? The devil himself. Your own worst enemy.
If you haven't already, I recommend you read Ant's meta of Megumi's character (hi Ant). Of particular interest to this whole ramble, is the idea that at the core of individuation, Megumi is being tasked with merging with his shadow and how that has greater implications...
God I love Jujutsu Kaisen...
Anon. THANKS for this ask. I am spoiled with brainrot inducing asks and I am very grateful for it.
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Which of the Quarry counselors do you think are more obvious about having favourite campers? What do you think are their tells?
thank you for the ask! obviously all of the counselors try very very hard to not pick favorites & some of them are better than others. Emma can't help herself - there's a girl in her cabin with severe confidence issues that she can't help but take under her wing. she's not TOO obvious, she's a role model after all, but she picks the girl to be her assistant during demonstrations more often, "accidentally" runs into her during free time almost every day to see how & what she's doing, ends up braiding her hair at least once a week. but when anyone else asks to be braided, she does them too bc she doesn't want anyone to feel left out. the braiding nights end up helping her little star make friends with some of the other girls in her cabin & Emma couldn't be prouder. there's also prolly a cluster of Emma-esque girls that constantly seek her out & she (not-so) secretly preens under the attention
Jacob's a little more obvious about the scrappy little kid he takes to on the third day of camp - they're always the first kid he greets, loud & obnoxious, & he's always scouting them out to play frisbee or throw a football. they tell him he's annoying & he smells bad but they always go with him. Jacob gives them terrible advice, they give him equally-as-terrible (but for jokes) advice & it's very chaotically wholesome. whenever he's not with them, he's definitely the leader of the pack for a bunch of noisy, rambunctious boys that either play football or cause general mayhem
Dylan & Kaitlyn are a lot better at hiding it. they see how obvious Chris is after all. their daily rounds happen to brush by a certain camper's favorite "hiding" spot? crazy. hey, now that i've seen you, did you eat much at breakfast? seemed kind of zoned out - you need to talk about anything? there's always conveniently a spot near them at the meal table. if they notice the kid reading a certain book, they'll find it in the library to skim through so they can happen to bring it up- oh thats a good book! who's your fav character? mine's blorbo.
i don't know if Abi or Ryan picks favorites but they're prolly good at keeping it to themselves, & Nick is so weird it's impossible to tell if he likes someone or not bc his behavior never makes any sense. thank you for coming to my ted talk
#this was fun :)#i don't know how accurate they are but i like thinking about it#the quarry#ask moth#no i cannot & will not stop bullying nick#again i dont hate him#i just feel the need to fight him in every fiber of my being
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assassins’ amoures
Fluff alphabet here for my favorite Assassins (and some Templars) to commemorate the 15th year and for Flufftober
Based off their names
E,Z,I,O
Ezio likes to be the equal one in a relationship, although in some more “spicy situations”, I can see him as a soft dom type. You bring out the better qualities of him, even light-hearted teasing aside. Keeping him focused and building him up keeps Ezio going. Even to the ends of the earth, he’ll do what he can to keep you safe and loved. When he’s in love, oh good luck to any trying to grab his attention. Thoughts are of you, with that blushed far off look, even Claudia and Leonardo are teasing him.
A,R,N,O
This boy?? This boi! This boyo is so in love he smiles non stop. Always day dreaming of you, reading pieces of poetry or romance literature that reminds him of you. Favorite nicknames are “my love, darling, heart/mon coeur” or personalized ones solely for you. He is every romantic cliche ever and then some! Adorkably a badass! When he’s not being an Assassin, he’s off in the gardens or taking strolls, and you’re always by his side. Arms linked.
S,H,A,Y 🚢 🌊
On the seas, Shay likes to sit out and spend time with you on the deck. On land, maybe a romantic walk at night. Given how this man left the Colonial Assassins and knew the Templars, there are most definitely secrets that can cause a rift but he claims to do so to protect you. That being said, he’s your hype man! Always guiding you and building you up, since he didn’t have a lot of that from someone he genuinely loves. When he’s away missing you, oh he’s an emotional wreck. Not showing it outwardly, but it’s a storm cloud inside him.
B,A,Y,E,K
Seeing you shoot off an arrow, the sun gleaming in your eyes and hair, you have never looked more ethereal than in this moment. Your strength and focus never fail to amaze Bayek. He sees you as his equal in all matters, though his kisses say otherwise. Passionate and all consuming of your being. Yet even such a focused man is keen to matters of the heart, and his calls for you when he finds the Order and is taken away for his work.
H,A,Y,T,M
A traditional man of sorts, Haytham likes to you spoil you in such ways. Fine clothes and some jewelry, along with long walks in town squares to show you off (in his own way). Being the significant other of the leader of Templars means you are privy to secrets, but Haytham has his reasons (at least he likes to think so). Aside from that, he adores your wit and humor and when away, likes to imagine the fun banter you two would have. He would absolutely be the type to want to marry you, falling into a peaceful domestic routine of sorts.
A,M,U,N,E,T (Aya)
Before and after becoming a Hidden One, Aya admired your presence. You were there for her through the worst of times and when she founded the Assassin’s with Bayek. Being her spouse, co-founder, fellow partner in crime means you have a leader of a wife who also enjoys a good time. She adores you, and you her, calling each other “my love” or “goddess”. Traveling together adds a sense of thrill and excitement in new places, although if you’re ever homesick, Aya/Amunet wants you to share that with her.
E,D,W,A,R
Life on the high seas can be rambunctious but Edward can count on your leadership. Sometimes. When you’re not getting into the crew’s shenanigans. Your fun-serious side, with a dash of ruthlessness, is one of the many becoming qualities he admires in you. When you’re not cracking jokes or death defying stunts/schemes, Kenway does have a softer side to him. Going out of his way to talk to you, or when you sees you off in a distance, daydreams how you’re buying his favorite rum for him as a gift or protecting him. Do you think of him as much as he does you? Or do you remember the time he covered you with a blanket one cold night?
J,A,C,O,B
You had been best friends with Jacob, but even the laughs and glances couldn’t fill the you-shaped hole in his heart. When you finally got together, there was never a shortage of admiration on his part about all that he admires about you, including your fun side. That being said, he’s a passionate man who is not shy about making it known how he feels about you, despite Evie’s teasing, and if a Rook tries to get chummy with you they find out real fast! Maybe laying it on a bit thick with the compliments but you know he’s genuine. He likes to scale the rooftops with you to get the best views, especially at sunset. If you ever have nightmares/panic attacks, Jacob knows what that feels like and he’s more than willing to help you through it.
C,O,N,R
Connor didn’t expect to fall in love after trying to rebuild, but you were a welcomed exception in his life. When he first started catching feelings, he thought it was subtle until your eyes met his and he turned away with a blush creeping on his cheeks. He may not be the most traditional romantic but once you realize what he’s doing, you’re touched by how sweet he is. Once you’re together, Connor’s little nicknames for you are along the lines of “love, dove” or maybe something floral. If you ever have nightmares/panic attacks, that soothing voice calms you down as he holds you close.
E,V,I
Unlike her twin, Evie likes to think she was refined and focused until she met you. Then her more carefree, free-spirited fluoridated when she spent more time with you. Jacob likes to tease that you’re a “bad influence”. She sees you as her equal in every way and comes to realize that even in the most trying times, she can let her walls down for you. She values you, in all ways a loving significant other can: your opinions, your ideas, your wants.
K,A,S,N,D,R
Kassandra is a woman who’s naturally curious and takes an interest your activities/hobbies, be it pottery or sword sparring. Her kisses are heated, gripping to you as if you’re her tether. She imagines a simple life with you at times, living out the rest of your years by the beach. If there’s anything you have set your sights on, your Amazonian love is in your corner 1000%. Romance is not her strongest suit, but you know she tries and that’s all that matters. I don’t know Ancient Greek dialect, but I’d imagine nicknames would be something like “sweetie” or “darling”.
A,L,E,X,I,O,S
Alexios did not expect to have a family again (Kassandra and his mother), let alone the heart of you. He respects and values you as his equal, and all that you do. He enjoys hunting, sailing and some sparring with you, and encourages you if you want to improve yourself. After settling down, your presence inspires him to be more at peace. He doesn’t have to be closed off or hesitant or the simplest actions. When he confessed, Alexios gripped tightly onto you, pouring every ounce of his soul into words. You gladly accept, and soon are pulled close to him in the tightest hug and sweetest kiss. After that, you could be doing the most mundane thing and Alexios looks at you as if you’re Queen of Olympus itself.
E,I,V,O,R
Eivor admires you, loves you, their beloved and equal in every way. An inspiration to fight to see tomorrow with you. Not “showy” with their emotions, or the most blatantly romantic, Eivor still has those moments where they want to be near you at every moment. Making sure you’re well fed, taken care of, or warm during the harsh winters. You’re a much valued and loved person in Eivor’s life, someone worth protecting amidst this dangerous lifestyle.
A,L,T,I,R
Though he won’t outright admit it, Altair admires your skill as a fellow assassin in training (mostly as an excuse to be near you). As long as Maria and Malik don’t rib him that the arrogant “novice” has finally been bested. If anything, it indirectly inspires him to do better/push himself to which you tease him relentlessly, but he’ll gladly take it since it’s you. When he finally confessed to you, the tense pause almost killed him (fearing you’d say no) only to return your hug ten fold in an iron grip. Cupping the back of your head. In the younger years, you two daredevils were always seeking out the highs of being an Assassin but mellow out with age. Still, that romance never dies with affectionate banter and nicknames, and gentle touches.
A,V,E,L,I,N
Aveline enjoys shopping with you or even taking (much needed) long walks with you. She sees you as her equal, and values your opinion, be it for both Assassin and other non-related matters. She’s faced betrayal and heartache but you’re an inspiration that there’s always a better tomorrow, no matter how small some victories may be. You confessed to her one night, and it was one of the happiest moments in Aveline’s life, the day you called her “my rose”. One of the loveliest, genuine aspects of her life, Aveline treasures her life with you.
#assassin’s creed#ac unity#ac rogue#ac syndicate#ac3#ac origins#ac valhalla#ac15#fluff alphabet#assassin’s creed black flag#assassin’s creed x reader#assassin’s creed brotherhood#assassin’s creed templars#ezio auditore da firenze#arno victor dorian#bayek of siwa#aya of alexandria#eivor#haytham kenway#connor kenway#edward kenway#shay patrick cormac#jacob frye x reader#evie frye#altair ibn la'ahad#aveline de grandpre#alexios of sparta#kassandra of sparta#flufftober#flufftober 2022
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bro let me COOK rafe’s mommy issues are so interesting like he definitely seems like he really wants someone nurturing and who will take care of him and be soft with him when he needs it because he never had that in a mother figure bc if rose has thought there was something wrong with him since he was 10 she was definitely avoidant at best and outright cold at worst (and most realistically). i think the lack of that would probably turn into him seeking out a woman who fills that archetypal Mother energy but also kind of overcompensating with what he expects from a partner? (soft, feminine, demure etc etc)
and i think where wires get crossed for some people is like they see s2&3 rafe and he obviously feels this need to be in charge and in power he’s not calling you mommy in the bedroom or anything but that can coexist alongside him subconsciously seeking a sort of motherly figure/energy in his partner because men like rafe don’t view their mothers as equals to begin with. he still has the power
SPEAK TO THESE NIGGAS!!!!!
like rafe wants a woman who fulfills very specific qualities (which is why i always say he wants someone stereotypically feminine) because he likes the idea of someone who's super caring and nurturing being with him to compensate for that need of a mother
and ur right about men like him not respecting their mothers, and thats because their fathers dont so they pick up on that and extend it to their partners.
like he rlly is very nate jacobs coded which makes him surprisingly easy to manipulate in some respects like how maddy tricked him into thinking she was a virgin because she knows he values that and i think you could do rafe like that but you would have to completely erase your more dominant personality traits because he wants someone subservient much like his dad does
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More info on my modern au called Sweet Tooth.
Francis Osman is the leader of the Turkish Mafia in Western Europe. Fleeing Turkey years back, he established a brutal reputation as some of Europe's most sadistic gangsters. For now, Francis and his gang are keeping a low profile due to someone close to him flipping with Interpol, which resulted in something devastating he swore to never experience again. Whilst this, they are in conflict with the Clerkenwell crime syndicate, otherwise known as 'the torture gang'. An equally malicious mob of smugglers who, since the Turkish Arifs took over London's underworld scene, their battle for territory has come close to an all-out war. What with this recent development crippling all of their profits, they are trying to strangle Francis' hold on the area and take over.
Francis is tearing through the backroads of London in his cherished Porsche to meet with his underboss Verrill Özdemir "Demi" who orchestrated a Comission with the surrounding heads to try and prevent a gang war at a time no one can afford it. He's looking for an out, maybe. Or a way to funnel money in a more advantageous way to get profits 📈 again under federal scrutiny.
He might have found both options in a happenstance encounter with a man and his spunky 13 year old at the park over his need for speed and a damn candy bar, but which one will he choose? An out for himself with this man or will he burn the man's life down to reestablish his crew through manipulation, taking piece by piece, because 'it's just business'...
This is a previously established Jacob Marley/Ebenezer Scrooge au (they were more closer in age here cause, eh)
Jacob and Ebenezer had adopted a young girl from a tragic situation shortly after marriage and raised her when Jacob died in a fatal car accident with Eb's sister Jan seven years ago due to coming to the aid of someone Eb still despises for taking so much from them, even if the loss sent him a revelation in life. Eb has a fear of car accidents taking more from him, which is why he drives so slowly, especially with Beryl.
The story is a SMAU which means it will be written, but with these post, Instagram and text conversations in between with artwork for photos.
Handles below, and the differences in personality are amusing. Francis' just kills me. These Hands. Eb is just lonely and secretly pines, even if he's given up trying to find love again and pours that into his besotted devotion to Beryl but he does gripe politics and talk bitchy about his competitors. Bob is just here for support and to follow news facts and nature groups. He takes pictures from his timeshare cabin alot(even if Eb bitches it's a scam) and is insufferable about outdoorsy events with the family. Eventually the man will move them to the woods to be one with nature, I swear. XD More characters have handles but these are the main ones seen.
Being Francis would absolutely NOT use his full name or have a public account for liability reasons, he would be creative. His account is mainly to lurk other accounts(mafia modernized) and keep updated on current events. People that follow him are in his inner circle or he's baiting them to think they are.
The Oz is a reference to yes the Wizzard of Oz because of course he would see himself that way. XD
He's the man behind the scenes running everything. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!
@rom-e-o @sasha-geonn
Below are some examples of what they post before they meet.
#Demi is an OC fleshed out from the main story Fox and the Rose as well as other main OCs.#scroogeverse#SweetToothverse#SMAU#scroogeposting#oc francis osman#ebenezer scrooge#scrooge 2022
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a prompt thing!
davey is sick and doesn’t show up to sell (or modern au to school/work/etc)
i'm distracting myself with writing so feel free to send me any prompts and i will try my best to write them!! <3
At first, they barely notice anything is wrong. Davey's back in school, but he's continued selling papes with the boys in the evenings and at the weekends. Although Davey had been a quick learner in the early days, he's becoming slower and he looks distracted.
It's brushed off with jokes, until Davey doesn't even have the energy to respond. "Sore throat," he musters, and Jack sends him home and promises to give their equal share to Les when he gets home that evening. He doesn't think much of it - the cold New York winters are harsh, especially during your first time selling in Demeber, and Davey looks like a strong gust of wind could knock him over on the best of days.
He walks Les home that night, refusing a dinner proposal again, and bids the younger boy goodbye and shouts out "make sure that brother of yours doesn't skip out on any more hard work!"
But Davey doesn't show up the next day, and neither does Les. Nor do they show up for three more days after that. Jack gets tired of waiting for the boys with no answer. He climbs up the fire escape to try and get into David's room, when he sees the outlines of tall figures looming in the background.
"He's burning up," one of the men say, leaning over Davey's bed. "Hot to the touch!"
He tries to make it through another window, when he's blocked by Sarah. "You can't be here," she says, worry dripping from every word.
"Davey?"
"They say it's scarlet fever," she says, and Jack's read too many headlines about how it's been killing children all over the world. His heart sinks, feeling utterly hopeless.
"Les?" he asks, clinging onto some hope.
"He's okay, he's with our grandparents. They wanted me to go too, but I told them I wouldn't go anywhere without Davey," she says confidently. "He'll be okay Jack."
"I..."
She places an arm on Jack's shoulder, giving him a sad, knowing look. "I know, Jack."
"What happened?"
"He came home from school, and ma caught him coughing up blood into a handkerchief. She told him to rest, but he only got worse. He was getting sick, kept complaining about pains. I've never seen him like that before Jack, it was scary. I haven't been able to see him since," she says, and Jack can tell she feels as lost without Davey as he does. "Go back Jack, they won't let you anywhere near him. I'll let you know when there's news."
Jack knows better than to argue with Sarah, so he lets himself wander off, walking back to the lodgings on autopilot. He doesn't say anything when he returns, not sure how to break the news to all of their friends who had been waiting for Jack to turn up with the Jacobs' boys behind. Instead, their eager faces begin to fall, and Jack runs straight up to the penthouse. He tells them eventually, and the lodgings don't feel the same as they used to anymore, not without the infectious laugh that follows the two wherever they go.
It's a long week, until finally Davey and Les join the line to pay for their papers. It's Crutchie who spots them first, and the boys run to crowd their friends. Les looks like he's eating up every bit of fame it takes, although Jack can see the protective grip he has on his older brother's hand.
"What? You miss me?" Davey asks, as Jack watches him smiling at the sight before him.
"Don't do that again," Race says, barging in to be the first to give Davey a hug. "You had us worried sick. I couldn't win a game of cards for days."
"I'm sorry that I through you off, your game" Davey says, as Specs is the next person to hug him, Les still holding onto him with a strong clutch. "Guys, I'm okay. I swear. Got it all out of my system."
One by one the Newsies say their hellos, and get on with their days, but before he catches up with the two, he watches Davey divide his share with Les, giving the young boy a few more papes than usual. Jack joins them then, puts his satchel around his arm, and he tells Les to run ahead to some women in the park talking.
"You really scared me Dave," Jack says, and watches as Davey's eyes wander from his excitable brother to his selling partner. "I saw you one night, when the docs were all crowded round you. And I just kept dreaming that I'd wake up and you weren't with us no more."
"Hey, hey. Jack, it's me. I'm here. I'm here and I'm okay," Davey says, grabbing Jack's hand. There's no one too close by, so Davey seemingly decides to risk such a bold move. "I'm really sorry that I scared you like that, but it's okay now."
Jack looks down at their hands, and wishes he could capture this moment with his new paint. Instead, he begins to trace the lines on Davey's hands. "I was afraid you wouldn't know just how much you mean to me."
"Jack -"
"You can't go anywhere, okay? Because I can't stop thinking about you and it's driving me crazy. I was too cowardly to say it before, but you've been it for me. And I've been crazy gone after you from the very beginning."
"Okay," Davey says, and Jack watches him.
"Okay?"
"Okay, I'll stay. Here with you, for as long as you'll let me."
Les runs up to them, dime in his hand before he looks at them both. "Gross. Come on, these papes won't sell themselves!"
Jack watches the kid run off, proud as punch, and he wraps an arm around Davey's shoulder, bumping into him. "One day I'll have you selling like him."
Davey pokes him in the side, before laughing to himself. "Oh shut up. You're the worse."
"You love it though."
"Yeah," Davey says, staring earnestly into Jack's eyes. "I really do."
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See, posts like this one here are what makes me think that some people must have watched a completely different show than I did.
This idea that Louis is drawn to Lestat because Lestat emasculates him is an odd one given that—do you know who else emasculates Louis? Literally every fucking white man he meets on a daily basis;
Tom Anderson, who calls Louis a most discrete negro and to whom Louis still has to say “Yes sir Mr. Anderson sir.”
The white lawyer who calls Louis an exceptional negro before condescendingly tapping him on the head like a dog—and whom Louis rips to shreds shortly after as a result.
Fenwick, who looks down on Louis and resents that Louis turned down his scraps. Who accuses Louis of being arrogant for wanting to rise above his station— and whom Louis guts like a pig and leaves on display as a warning to other white men who would want to disrespect him.
So does Louis also want to fuck all these other white men? Is he irresistibly aroused by their racist comments towards him and by the humiliating way they treat him?
Not to mention that Louis also grew up with a mother who emasculated him constantly, in whose eyes he was never good enough. She treated him as less than his whole life despite the fact that he provided for her and his entire family—including his good for nothing brother-in-law Levi, who Florence later replaces Louis with because, in her eyes, he makes a better son than Louis ever could.
His own mother who tells him “Don't come back fragile son” and who mocks him for the way he dresses and for his sexuality.
And yet you think being emasculated is what seduced Louis and drew him to Lestat?
It was nothing special to Louis, he was emasculated every single fucking day of his life.
What was different about his interaction with Lestat is that Lestat tells him they are “destined to be very good friends”, that Lestat openly compliments Louis and praises him, that Lestat says he is only in New Orleans because of Louis, that Louis is his destiny.
That's what draws Louis in and not the fact that Lestat initially talks down to him like every other racist piece of shit he meets when he enters into spaces where his society dictates he is not supposed to be.
Louis does not get drawn to Lestat because Lestat wins the dick-measuring contest—which makes Louis angry to the point where he wants to slit Lestat's throat with his cane sword—but in spite of it.
In that scene, Lestat was like one of those lame pick-up artists who insult you to lower your self-esteem so that you will respond better to their advances when they later compliment you. It's a classic manipulation technique and it works as intended because, in all his anger and frustration at the exchange, Louis still liked the way Lestat tied a string around his lungs.
I mean did you even listen to the speech Lestat makes in the church to convince Louis to accept the dark gift?
Notice how among all the things Lestat lists he includes deferential businessman.
That's because being deferential to white men is not Louis's true nature, and Lestat knows this. It is something that was forced upon him by the primitive country he lives in.
Louis says yes to Lestat in the church because Lestat promises he can free Louis from all of it and allow him to finally live, not just as an equal, but as something far superior.
Lestat promises Louis—a man who has been disempowered his entire life—a power he can't begin to imagine (and also love and acceptance as an added bonus).
We later find out this was a lie, of course—becoming a vampire does not free Louis from having to experience structural racism and homophobia. As Jacob said in this interview, as a black vampire you can kill and eat one racist or maybe even a thousand but you can't singlehandedly dismantle systemic racism.
So this implication that because Louis is disenfranchised by the racist society he lives in, it must mean he enjoys being degraded, enjoys being talked down to, enjoys being treated as less of a man simply because of the colour of his skin or his sexual preference is INSANE to me.
This kind of discourse, coming from people who claim to be Louis fans is frankly baffling because it's no different than the racist Lestat stans who always want to shift the blame onto Louis for everything Lestat subjects him to during their relationship. This is no different than saying that Louis chose to be abused, was asking for it, and even secretly enjoyed it. That Louis was looking for an excuse to fight with Lestat and probably loved getting beaten within an inch of his life like I saw some idiot say in a comment the other day.
Listen, I'm all for everyone having their own interpretation of the show but in my humble opinion, if you think along these lines then you have fundamentally misunderstood both Louis and Lestat as characters and the dynamic of their relationship. But most importantly you have completely missed the main point that both the show and the book are trying to make.
#I had to make a post about it because I refuse to let stupidity like this go unchallenged#the fact that this is the fandom's 'kang' whose fics y'all eat up like candy is frankly concerning#because this same racist and victim-blaming rhetoric is reflected in the dehumanizing way they write Louis#and yet people still eat that shit up#sad#iwtv#iwtv meta#interview with the vampire#fandom woes
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Had a four hour car drive yesterday and thought about what monster hunter weapons each of the The Quarry characters would use so please enjoy this analysis of monster hunter weapon type mains and playstyles that literally no one asked for. I'm basing this off of World: Iceborne since it's the game I'm most familiar with.
Jacob:
This himbo would be a greatsword main. It's big, it's clumsy, but it packs one hell of a punch when it lands. Big sword means big damage numbers. He wouldn't use any of the side or rising slashes. It would be true charged slash or nothing, like god intended. He'd forget to block more often than not and get knocked back quite a bit, but he'd land enough hits to do a formidable amount of damage. Also, Kaitlyn would yell at him enough that he'd go after the tail like he's supposed to lol.
Kaitlyn:
My girl would be a light bowgun main. Heavy bowgun would be too slow for her tastes, and while it does do more damage, I could see her giving that up for more maneuverability. I could also see her doing a hardcore sticky build. It'd be five minutes into the fight and she's already got the monster stunned and on the ground. She never misses her shots and would be the one to take the time to tenderize monster parts before absolutely blasting them to shreds.
Depending on the monster, I could also see her doing a DPS spread build. She'd pile on the short-range damage mods and get up close and personal, hitting all the weak spots like the shotgun-wielding queen we know she is.
Any team she'd be on would be formidable, especially if she had someone like Dylan drawing aggro for her.
Dylan:
Our boy has two mains. The first is a defensive lance build. He's up front in center, hiding behind that shield while drawing aggro and taking hits like a champ. He's not a DPS, he's a full on tank, with max defense, fortitude, shield, and knockback jewels. And he'd be making jokes about stabbing the monster with his pointy stick the entire time, if you know what I mean.
His second main would be hunting horn. As much as the boy loves music, how could he not? Smacking monsters around while composing sick beats and buffing your teammates all at once is the perfect combo. He'd be a support-class king. I could see him running wide-range with speed-eating as well to serve as a healer.
Ryan:
Ryan's a bit harder to pin down since he can be equal parts aggressive/defensive depending on the choices you make in the game, so he'd probably choose a weapon that had a shield. More than likely it'd either be sword and shield or gunlance. He wouldn't bother with layering on the defense though, only elemental resistances. He'd boost his attack to get right in the thick of it, but would have a shield to fall back on if things got hairy.
His playstyle would be dependent on who his teammates were. If he's with Dylan, he's probably running sword and shield, because otherwise Dylan would be making jokes about him "blowing his load" in the monster with a gunlance.
If he's running sword and shield, I could see him running wide-range, especially if he's with both Kaitlyn and Dylan and Dylan was running lance.
Laura:
Girlboss is in it to win it. She's DPS through and through. Shields are for people who don't know how to dodge. If the monster is hitting you hard you hit it back harder.
When she's with other people she's maining switchaxe and is min-maxing the hell out of her build. She's got max attack, max expert, max challenger, and is eating for attack. She's zero sum discharging her load right into the monster's weak point and is loaded up on destroyer jewels to break every part on that motherfucker. If you can kill a monster fast, Laura can kill it faster. If it takes longer to set up a trap than it does to kill the monster, she's killing it.
When Laura is solo she's running a min/max heroics hammer build, because she fears no god and she fears no monster.
Max:
Max is a dual blades user. Easy to learn, easy to use, with the added bonus of Naruto running. He'd be more of a healer support build, running wide-range and buffing Laura so she could focus on damage. He'd make sure all the parts were tenderized for her. But he'd also always try to mount the monster (and of course make jokes about it), much to Laura's chagrine.
Abi:
Insect glaive all the way. She's up and away from the fight playing The Floor Is Lava. She'd load up on defense and elemental resistances and max her stamina regen to let her keep going as long as possible. She's not here to DPS she's here to survive and she'd be good at it. Also, she thinks the kinsect is cute.
Her and Nick/Emma would make a good team since most of the time she'd be out of the way of their attacks and wouldn't get hit. Abi would always want to capture monsters because she would feel bad killing them.
Nick:
Nick's another hard one to pin down, but I could see him maining either longsword or heavy bowgun. Both because they would make him look cool lol.
For longsword he would focus on using helmbreaker as much as possible but wouldn't be great at countering. He'd also forget that his spirit attacks hit his teammates and would get in fights with Jacob since they would constantly be interrupting each others combos.
For heavy bowgun, he wouldn't have different builds, he'd probably just have one generic build for everything. He wouldn't use just one type of ammo, he'd switch between everything he could fit in his inventory. He'd prefer wyvernheart over wyvernsnipe.
Emma:
Emma would be a chargeblade main with an equal parts defense/damage build. It's a flashy weapon that still has good defensive capabilities and she would take the time to properly learn how to counterblock and the intricacies of sword and shield mode versus axe mod. I could see her also focusing on utilizing monsters' elemental and status weaknesses against them. She'd be an ideal teammate for the Alatreon fight.
I could also see Emma using bow. She'd be inflicting statuses on monsters left and right. And as a bow user, she'd be a clutch claw queen. She's tenderizing all the parts and is the first to throw the monster into walls as soon as they unenrage.
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I want to know what other people think, if you agree with me or not. Let me know!
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They Were Born...
Character(s): Jacob Seed, Joseph Seed, John Seed, Old Man Seed
Summary: Experimental fic for the Daemon AU, technically a wip as i'm still working on Faiths part
Warning(s): Canon typical violence, child abuse, child neglect, Homophobia, Religious themes
When Jacob is born he's born screaming, clawing at the air and raging war with whatever came into contact. He's not soothed by a Mother's loving touch, or held tightly to a proud Father's chest. He's passed between nurses, cold and dark and covered in blood. He only stops crying when the sound of an animal's pitiful howl joins him, and a warmth weighs him down. A wet nose nudges his cheek and he knows he's not alone; his Daemon was born howling.
When Jacob takes his first steps he is not recorded, there are no arms waiting to catch him if he stumbles. But his Daemon is there, Dante is there. He wobbles on his small legs, grabs onto Dante's snout to steady himself. He doesn't understand this is special, he just laughs with a toothless smile as he and Dante shuffle across the floor together. Dante wobbles more than Jacob, he falls and Jacob falls with him. They get back up.
When Jacob is two he breaks a photo frame. An old photo of men who had never stepped foot in this cold house lay on the floor surrounded by shards of glass. Jacob cries; Dante cries too. Glass is stuck in Jacob's hand and Dante tries to pull it out but they both wail and jump apart when he does. No worried Mother runs to make sure he's okay, the sound of angry footsteps echo through the house. Jacob is two when his father first hits him.
Joseph is born quiet, almost like a ghost. If it weren't for the rise and fall of his small pink chest he would have been mistaken for a gruesome statue. His mother screams and nurses rush him away to clean him, there's a presence with him as he lays in his cot. A comforting presence that curls around him; Evelyn is equally quiet. Jacob stands behind a plane of glass and sees his little brother for the first time, Dante scratches at the door and whines. He's a big brother now, he doesn't understand completely but he knows it's important. When they get home his Father hands Joseph to Jacob, his Mother disappears into the kitchen. Evelyn grabs onto Dante's fur, Joseph holds Jacob's finger. He's a big brother now.
Joseph's first steps are taken outside, in their small backyard with patches of dried grass and dirt. Jacob holds his arms out for him, Dante walks by his side ready to catch him; Evelyn's on his back. Jacob cheers for his brother, lifts him as best he can and spins him proudly. Joseph is one years old and his laugh is infectious, Evelyn squeaks and jumps around on Dante's back; she wants to spin too. The water sprinklers come on as they spin around the yard, it's a good day.
When Jacob is five he takes his first steps through intimidating metal gates twice his size, Dante sitting on his shoulder as a school building looms over them. There are no tearful parents watching him take these steps, no fixing of his second hand shirt and no expert hands to tie his untied shoelaces. He's tired, he didn't get any sleep that night. Old Man Seed wouldn't let him; not until he and Dante knew what they could and couldn't say. This wasn't like church, they were going to be unsupervised for seven hours. Jacob was excited; until he wasn't. The teachers were cruel; their gazes burnt into Dante until he hid himself in Jacob's bag. Jacob didn't understand, he wouldn't until much later.
Evelyn isn't like other Daemon's, she climbs onto people at church. As soon as she learns how too she tries speaking to everyone who will listen, Joseph's favourite word is "why?". The priests and nuns say it goes against God, they need to be fixed. Old Man Seed agrees, his Mother is silent. Jacob holds his brother as they stand outside the church, he knows what's coming; he knows what he has to do. When they get home he talks back, Dante snaps at the old Crow always on his shoulder and when that red hot anger flashes across the man's face Jacob knows Joseph is safe for now. He can't walk without limping on Monday but he feels proud, he protected his brother. But he knows it won't last. Joseph's face is bruised when he gets home. It didn't last at all.
John is born crying, gargling and clinging to the nurses that took him from a defeated looking woman. John can't stay still, even when Seraphine is in the cot with him; they both writhe and wail. The wailing doesn't stop, it is raw. Jacob holds Joseph up to the glass to see their new baby brother, Evelyn sneaks into the room as a nurse walks out. Joseph puts his hand on the glass, he's a big brother now too. He doesn't know what that means, but Jacob tells him it's important. Joseph wants to hold him. Evelyn pats John's face and cradles Seraphine to her chest. They stop wailing.
John's first steps are magical, they're at the local park and Joseph is building a sandcastle. Evelyn is fixing John's hat when he grabs onto her and pulls himself to his feet. Jacob grabs the shitty camera he'd gotten at a pawn shop, traded it with a ring his Mother never wore anymore and hits record. John giggled, cheeks red and chin covered in drool as he hobbled towards the sandpit; both arms outstretched to balance him. Joseph forgets about the sandcastle, awe in his smile as he gets up and steps out of the sandpit. He looks at Jacob to make sure he's seeing this moment, he is. He never missed a minute. Joseph mimicked his older brother, held his arms out and cheered John's name. Joseph spun him around and Evelyn picked up Seraphine, put her on Dante's back and the three Daemons danced in the flowers blissfully.
Old Man Seed gets worse; Jacob gets angrier. Joseph stays quiet, John was only two and already his light was being snubbed out. Evelyn would climb onto Jacob's shoulders when they tensed, pet his unruly red hair as she and Joseph whispered words to calm and reasonable for their age. John would wrap his small arms around his leg, look up at him with tearful eyes and apologise. He had nothing to be sorry for, but he cried like he did.
It's summer when Dante settles, Old Man Seed is on another rampage and Dante gets in his way. He's thrown into a wall and Jacob howls as he feels gravity throw him to the ground. He can feel the change, it's too soon, they weren't ready. But it wasn't up to them. Jacob buries his face into his fur, a wolf pup shaking and whimpering and trying to scratch off the feeling of that cold, hateful hand. Jacob feels it too, the back of his neck burns and no matter how much he scrubs in the shower the next morning he can still feel it. Joseph and John ask him what happened, he gives them their lunch boxes and tells them not to worry about it.
Jacob gets called a slur at school, the other boys say him having a male Daemon means he was made wrong. He has more to worry about than what they think, he doesn't care about being shunned at lunch tables. He spends time with Joseph during lunch, he can tell Joseph cares more than he does about being rejected by their classmates. Evelyn makes excuses, Joseph says something about a voice; Jacob's trying not to get up and pummel the kids mocking them from the basketball court.
Jacob nearly burns the house down when he sees John's thighs covered in welts, Dante is ready to swallow that old crow whole. John is tearful, he says it's okay; he's strong just like Jacob. But he's not, Jacob knows he's not. He doesn't want him to have to be. Joseph coaxes him out of it again; the voice of reason as Evelyn wraps around John's shoulders comfortingly. Seraphine hides in Joseph jumper, Dante paces and growls, claws digging at nails in the floorboards and teeth gnashing. Jacob sits down in the middle of the floor, he wants to cry. He hadn't cried in a very long time, he thinks he forgot how. But oh, he still knows how to howl.
Old Man Seed pulls Jacob and Joseph out of school, their Mother is a distant memory. A ghost that danced on stairways and wasted away under covers. John starts pre-school, the other kids love him. He has fun, he likes the adults with gentle smiles and kind eyes; they're nothing like his Father or people at church who call Seraphine a bad omen. Seraphine likes them too. Jacob and Joseph don't enjoy homeschooling but they're happy John gets his hours of freedom a day now. They enjoy mornings, where Old Man Seed is gone and it's the three of them in the kitchen eating breakfast. Joseph will button John's coat, Evelyn will fix his hair. Dante brings him his bag and Seraphine holds onto Joseph for as long as possible until Jacob walks him to the bus stop. It almost feels normal.
Joseph just wanted to read a comic book, he got welts and cults on his back instead. He hears a voice, there's an urgency within him. Evelyn is scared of it, Joseph thinks of it as a friend. Jacob doesn't know what to think but he puts faith in his little brother. He trusts him, more than anyone. He listens when Joseph dissuades him from following through with one of his many plans to end Old Man Seeds tirade once and for all. Dante still gets too close to the old crow.
Joseph can feel something coming and it does; John kicks and screams as he's carried to a car, Seraphine hiding in his pocket. Jacob and Dante growl and claw and bite, they snarl at the people shoving them into the back seat. Joseph and Evelyn politely follow one of the social workers, sliding into the backseat next to Jacob and John. He tells Jacob they'll be okay. Jacob doesn't say anything back.
#Far Cry 5#Jacob Seed#Joseph Seed#John Seed#Daemon AU Tag#daemon au#Far Cry Tag#this is a bit old and not beta'd so sorry if it's a bit rough!#I just wanted to get it out there bc I love this au#it hurts me immensely :“>
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