#he actually tried to protect kirk from finding out the truth because he knew it would upset him
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fellas is it gay to lovingly caress your captains face as you remove his memories because you don’t want him to cry anymore. (he’s crying because he flirted with leonardo da vinci’s robot girlfriend too hard and she blew up fyi) just before this a mutual friend told you he pitied you because you had no capacity to love.
#although wiping jims mind was quite an unhinged breach of trust#the way he just sadly whispers ‘forget’ 🥹#why did bones come for poor spock so hard this episode this episode though?#he didnt even do anything to deserve it lmao#he actually tried to protect kirk from finding out the truth because he knew it would upset him#and bones was still like this is on you bitch#episode is requiem for methuselah btw#tos#star trek tos#star trek#jim kirk
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The Lone Survivor: Part 2
Spock x Fem!Reader
Premise: Fem!Reader accidentally bonds with Spock when rescued from her own starship crash. The Golden Trio realize the footage from the wreck could wrongfully incriminate the reader. They attempt to find a way out of this. PART ONE HERE
SLOW BURN. Eventual smut in later parts. More Bones dialogue than probably necessary but WHATEVER. Fatherly Bones. There will be more one on one Reader and Spock in part three. Right now it plays like a normal episode with build up because I’m stubborn.
WARNINGS: Movie amnesia, sexual themes if you squint, mentions of death, and implied one-sided matrimony.
Part 2: The Night We Met I Knew I Needed You So
There was no mistaking the final moments illustrated in the found footage from the Calvary. It was you assaulting the crew on the bridge-you setting a course straight to destruction on Toravalve 9.
However, Mister Spock had disagreed. He had reached into your mind and saw you in your own eyes. It couldn’t have been you.
After carrying you back to the medbay you were put safely back in your bed with a Doctor McCoy who hovered over you like a disgruntled mother bear. With the tricorder at your forehead you pleaded with him to relax.
Captain Kirk had been summoned to hear what you both, or rather, Mister Spock had to say. For some stranger reason Spock omitted the existence of the orange tape. He deliberated his own findings via meld instead.
“A copy of sorts, Captain.”
“And you’re sure you saw the Lieutenant looking...at her own self?”
“As unlikely as it may seem, it is was I saw. Although it was also demonstrated that the Lieutenant received a severe head injury before witnessing her own self attack the crew members.”
“And you’re sure it wasn’t some kind of...” Kirk deliberated for a moment, “... out of body experience.”
“Also unlikely. Although it is perceivable Lieutenant L/N maybe have suffered delusions after cranial trauma I possess a suspicion that an illusion was made unto the Lieutenant and the crew.”
Kirk glanced at you for a moment and back to Spock, quizzically at first, but then with a dashing smirk. “A hunch, Spock? How very...human.”
Spock quirked a brow, hands still stonily behind his back, “All endeavors begin with a hypothesis.”
“You believe me,” you murmured, from your bed still although no longer in your white, medbay gown you were graciously presented with black Starfleet fatigues. Nurse Chapel had gently maneuvered your unruly waves into two pleats that were coming undone slowly.
A stark contrast to the pristine, polished head science officer.
The fingers on Spock’s right hand flexed at the sound of your voice.
He only turned his head to look at you, “Empirical data is what needs to be obtained-whether I believe what memories are buried in your subconscious is incidental.”
“They still don’t feel real,” you admitted. Not even your name felt real.
“Such an admission will not help your case and I advise you keep that opinion to yourself, Lieutenant.”
You felt like he was chiding you. Your ground your jaw slightly and you knew he could feel it: the aggravation, the impatience. Fear.
His right fingers flexed again, but his expression, unchanging as ever, gave nothing away.
The electric pool of warmth in the back of your mind hushed you, told you to remain calm. Diplomatic.
How could looking at your own self feel real? ‘She’ seemed so real. You had walked around the corner and met yourself, squaring you up instantly. She lunged for you and you wrestled with her, shocked at the fact that you had your own hands around your throat. They weren’t your hands. It was an imposter.
How? That was the real question.
“How do we find proof then, Mister Spock?” Kirk asked, reinserting himself.
“We locate the imposter and confirm my hypothesis.”
“You make it sound so easy,” Kirk replied.
“Indeed it will not be so. Commander Craft is aware of the meld that took place and will order me to testify my findings against the lieutenant. Until the Lieutenant’s sanity can be declared-”
“I’m sure I can help with that,” the doctor said, almost appearing out of nowhere.
“What is left is concrete evidence,” Spock added.
“The imposter,” Kirk finished, nodding.
“Who’s Commander Craft?” you asked.
He turned to look at you. You were made to feel the oblivious child with everyone in the room talking about you. However, you listened and you absorbed. You were careful with your input. Listen first, talk later, you thought to yourself. The presence in the back of your mind hummed in monotonic approval as if to say, good girl.
You wondered what those words tasted like on Spock’s lips. You shuddered in embarrassment and turned your head away.
Spock coughed uncharacteristically, “Commander Craft is the elected official heading the investigation crew from the Federation. We were contacted yesterday and were to present a full report of our findings and happenings.”
Which included the bond. That detail in itself was still above you, not fully explained nor understood. You could feel it for what it was and knew he was there. Not why or how, however.
“We must garner more time,” Spock continued to his captain, “And possibly keep myself from testifying.”
“We could declare you insane,” the doctor quipped earning another brow arch from his opposing.
“You’re asking for a loophole,” Kirk stated.
“Essentially, Captain.”
Kirk seemed to know there was more to it, the way he pursed his lips and put his fists on his hips. You knew yourself that if Spock testified against you with what he saw in the meld then there was no evidence against you truly-just what you yourself witnessed. However, Spock would be asked to tell the whole truth and that included the tape. If you were deemed crazy then your own experiences would be null and void.
Did Kirk already know about the tape?
Kirk sighed,” Spock, I...we’d be misleading not only Starfleet, but the Federation. This isn’t the first time you’ve-” he glanced at you, “-taken the unorthodox route to obtain justice.”
“Then I am asking for your trust, Captain.”
Kirk’s eyes narrowed then softened. He relented and with a sturdy tone which meant business as he relayed, “I suppose you already a loophole in mind then?”
“Indeed, Captain.”
“I would expect nothing less.”
Spock paused, fighting to look at you.
“Well, aren’t you gonna tell us?” the doctor asked.
“Proposals are not so elementary to make on Vulcan, even when it is logical...but also yet not as it could fare unfavorable circumstances. Especially if one party is unwilling.”
It took Kirk a moment, and even the doctor even longer.
“You mean...?”
“Yes, Captain.”
“You’re willing to marry her so you don’t have to testify?” he asked incredulously.
You were stupefied, impressed, but stupefied. The stoic Vulcan could play dirty. An actual proposal.
“You’re going to marry her?” Bones asked, mortified, “She’s a person...not a pawn! This is her life we’re meddling with. Marriage is a serious thing-”
“You’ll find, Doctor, that I am quite serious.”
“You could wreck her life.”
“I intend on saving it.”
Spock, your heart breathed.
“It seems like a reach for you, Spock,” Kirk said, “They would never believe the both of you, even if Y/N did agree.”
“It will be most believable as the Lieutenant and I have already made a bond.”
Silence befell everyone.
“You can’t be serious,” the doctor said finally, a fierce protectiveness in his voice. “At a time like this-”
“It was not intended as I am careful to shield my mind when partaking tactility with other forms-but, she called to me.”
And he had found you in the dark.
“She accepted it-although it is possible that may be due to the extreme duress she was suffering.”
“And you were there to save her,” Bones finished, a grave distaste in his voice.
“Such a bond can be mediated by a healer with moderate difficult just as a Terran divorce can be secured.”
It was a slap to the face. He was as willing to ‘save’ you as he was to dump you and leave you for dead. Red hot turmoil threatened in your core and you clenched your blankets. What was the point then?
Your crew was dead, your reputation tarnished, and everyone thought you were a murderer.
Let me die, you thought, just let me die.
“Certainly not,” Spock said quietly. Both the Captain and the Doctor eyed him wearily as this random statement.
“So you...negating your-”
“No, sir. I am simply waiting for Lieutenant L/N’s input on the matter.”
“There’s no way in hell she’d agree to this. The bond is clearly one-sided, Spock. How could you be so irresponsible?” Bones chided.
“A explanation escapes me.” He was still looking at you with smoldering eyes, with bright stars dancing behind them. Cold, but fierce.
What other shot did you have? How else could you bide time while searching for this monster? You wanted to give up. It would be easy.
Kirk leaned in to his second in command and suggested softly, “Perhaps you should ask more properly, Mister Spock. She is a lady. Bones is right. It’s her life.”
“Lieutenant-”
Kirk elbowed him.
“Y/N,” he corrected himself, “Will-”
“Yes,” you blurted in a hushed voice, “I will marry you, Mister Spock.”
x
You were left in your bed again under strict supervision this time. You reveled in the shock of what you’d just agreed to, and even the shock of the situation in its entirety. Rediscovering the monster that claimed your crew and your identity was still fresh and seeing it through your own eyes again with the meld drained the life out of you. You were exhausted, but your mind still raced. ‘It’ was on the ship-it had to be. They didn’t find a copy of you or anyone else in the wreckage. You wondered how recognizable some of your crewmates were and you had to still your frantic thoughts.
“What ever is going on up there it needs to stop. You heart rate is very high.” Doctor McCoy was already readying a hypo.
“That...thing. It might be here-”
“We’re on high alert, looking for any copies of ourselves. It’s not the first time this kind of thing has happened,” he tried to assure you.
“There are no red lights.”
“They get annoying after awhile. Whatever it is, it’s damn good at hiding. But we’ll flush it out. The Captain has a plan.”
“Did Mister Spock tell you the imposter can read your memories? That’s how it tricked me. Did he tell the captain?” you asked, wring your hands with the blanket.
“Your guess is better than mine.”
You thought back to Spock’s omission to the orange tape. Always flipping back and forth between elusive affection and monotonous professionalism. Marry me. Divorce after.
“He’s hard to place sometimes.”
“And you agreed to marry him.”
“I did,” you blurted stubbornly. “We’re bonded.”
Bones suddenly became eye level with you, bracing both hands on the rail. “But do you know what that even means?”
You arched a brown similar to Vulcan fashion, “Do you, good doctor?”
Bones shook his head and instead asked, “Sleep now or later? Does it help with the nightmares?”
“Yes, I think so. Now, I think. Doctor?”
“Yes, kitty?”
“Thankyou.”
x
Sleep was apart of the healing process and being roused from it interrupted that. That was at least what Bones tried to argue when the captain requested your presence in the conference room. Flanked by your fiancé and the kindly captain himself you were expected to hold an interview of sorts with Commander Craft via telecom before his arrival at the crash site. Several ships had already come to help clean up.
“What am I supposed to say?” you half pleaded with them, “I’m not good at lying.”
“You do not have to be deceitful. However, if you find yourself under duress the commander may suspect a guilt as I had sensed upon our initial meeting,” Spock replied, one arm linked on your good side.
Your other arm supported a crutch when had a nervous hand floating behind it via the captain.
Kirk shot a reassuring look your way. “I recommend the truth. Tell him what you told me, and you’ll be fine. He’s a bit of a stickler for rules and he’s tough on the stand-”
“Jesus,” you muttered.
“Or...a bit of theatrics couldn’t hurt if you get too overwhelmed. You did just lose your crew.”
“How could I forget?” Your lip quivered.
You three paused at the door.
“I trust my first officer, Y/N,” Kirk turned to face you, “As unorthodox as this has become, I put trust into his melds and by what he has told me you didn’t do anything wrong. That thing-that monster did.”
You couldn’t stop the tears dribbling. “Captain, I let my crew die.”
“Any death having occurred was unintentional on your part, Lieutenant, ”Spock said in his chilly tone, “As was demonstrated in your memory you tired to apprehend and fend off the creature, but to no avail. You did everything in your power. The human emotional phenomena your are experiencing is common upon singular entities having being spared from genocide.”
“That is?” Kirk asked.
“Survivor’s guilt,” you sighed, finishing the statement for you fiancé.
x
Commander Craft was not unkind, nor did he smile. He was neither young or old and his questions were fairly basic as the captain’s were three days earlier. You recounted all you could remember, and it was stressed by you and the captain that you had lost most of your general memory due to head trauma. Whether he seemed convinced was unknown to you. You tried to hold back in your distress. The warmth in the back of your mind wrapped around the little knot that pain and anxiety was birthed. It was squeezed it slowly, like the grasp of a hand. You delivered your answers calmly.
“The double of yourself, you saw. Did you see it transform from your father to yourself?” the commander asked.
“No sir.”
“Have you seen a copy of yourself since you boarded the Enterprise?”
“No sir.”
“And no foreign entity has been detected on the ship?”
“No sir,” the captain replied.
“Mmm,” the commander paused for the first time in what seemed like hours. “L/N, had you ever experiences delusions or hallucinations before?”
“I don’t remember.”
“And did you experience the trauma to your head before or after you saw yourself sabotaging the ship?”
“I...” you glanced, “I’m not sure. After?”
“Do you remember hitting your head at all?”
“I remember the copy throwing me hard against the wall and everything going black.” You tried to strengthen your voice, but it kept cracking. You heart continued to race. “And-”
It flashed.
“When I let my father on the ship. I went black there too. But I’m not sure if I hit my head that time.”
“And Mister Spock you were able to witness what Lieutenant L/N saw?”
“Affirmative.”
“But...through her point of view.”
Fuck. You had a feeling he would try to pull the crazy card.
“Were there any observation tapes recovered from the crash?”
“My crew obtained few, but to my knowledge they are still processing them,” the captain answered smoothly.
“Has any other information been made available to any of you?”
You could feel the edges of your vision blacken. You couldn’t make eye contact with him. Cold sweat had broken from your brow. A cold, steady hand placed itself to your brow. The natural warmth on your mind shimmered.
“She has a fever, Captain.”
“I won’t tolerate any nonsense, Lieutenant-”
“Commander, she has just lost four-hundred members of her family to a people-eating imposter!” Kirk bellowed lowly, “She’s kept it together well so far. I commend her efforts. You have the wrong idea about her.”
“Until I can find proof of this ‘imposter’ and until her psyche can be cleared by one of our doctors then we’ll see. This isn’t the first time the Federation has had to deal with the Enterprise’s shenanigans.”
“People eating?” you whispered in disbelief. Oh my god.
Spock caught on to Kirk’s unnecessary honesty. “It was discovered the imposter’s prime directive was to use the Calvary’s crew as sustenance.”
You toppled forwards and were caught and cradled by your fiancé.
“Take her to the medbay, Mister Spock,” Kirk ordered.
“Call for the doctor. I am not taking my eyes off her until we arrive!” the commander snapped.
“By the time Doctor McCoy arrives she will succumb to shock. I must attend to my t’hy’la in the most logical and efficient manner possible.”
Kirk fought the need to smile, not realizing that your theatrics weren’t really theatrics.
x
PART THREE
#spock#mister spock#mr spock#startrek#tos#star trek#spock x reader#spock x fem!reader#doctor mccoy#bones#jim kirk#captain kirk#kirk#oc#reader#slow burn#song lyrics of chapter is Be My Baby by The Ronettes
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I have just seen "Misere", 8.14 of The Blacklist. In fact I have watched this episode three times back to back and this is what I have to say about it, what I must say about, what I feel obliged to say about it.
First things first, I felt Red's grief as acutely as I would have felt my own grief. Liz' part in Anne's unfortunate death was just that, accidental. And I do believe that this is the turning point in this feud that Liz started against Red. For a time being she wanted to act like an avenging angel of death when it came to Red, but to go all the way through, and actually take his life not with the help of other people and devises, but with her own hands, is what she quite simply couldn't do. She had said she knows Red's weakest spot, "you can not kill me and I can", but the reality of it that she herself is facing one truth right now, to which the spirit of her soul, of all the good there is in her, leads her as Mr. Kaplan.
Before "Misere" Liz' motivation has been revenge for her "Mother". Right now it is the way back to "just let your consience be your guide". Liz is not a cold-blooded murderer. She wasn't one in season 2, she is not now. She was blinded by her rage, pain, loss, she was all for handling the flaming sword of vengence and bringing it on Red's head. But seeing his sorrow and pain, just like being on the brink of being the reason why Ressler could have died only because Liz was attempting to kill Red in the hospital in the beginning of the season, showed Liz that a rampage of revenge is a way to fully loosing herself, not finding the true path to her destiny.
She may blame Red for putting Tom into her life - but Tom has become the love of her lif, no Tom without Red=no Agnes without Red. She may blame Red for Tom's demise and her own coma, Kaplan's death, Sam's death, the Witch' death, but the truth is: Sam was dying anyway, Tom died because of Kaplan's actions, of her setting him up by giving him the bones she dug up of her own volition, she herself killed herseld because SHE WENT TOO FAR IN HER REVENGE ON RED! And here is Liz, seeing Mr. Kaplan as the one person whose spirit is showing Liz exactly what revenge is turing her, Liz, in! Which is both beautifully heartbreaking and extreamly plausible.
What essentualy would have changed if Red had chosen to stay away from Liz? She chose to study forensic psychology because that was her choice. She decided to work for the FBI because that was her choice. She wouldn't have Tom and Agnes, but there would be a man, probably marriage, child, most likely adopted, because that was what she wanted. She would learn to think like a criminal even without Red, because to be a good profiler, she would need a deeper understanding of how criminal mind works, only she would learn longer and harder. She would discover that justice is not always achieved lawfully. She would discover her inner nature with or without Red, Sam would die of canser anyway. And who knows, Kirk and/or the Witch may have discovered that Katarina Rostova's Daughter is alive and works as an FBI profiler. Then the Cabal, and all the others could get the wind of that fact too. And then the hunt would begin, only without Red to lessen the impact of the hunt, the reason for which would come as a complete shock to an unsuspecting profiler.
Liz was marked before she was even born. Red as the Mother could only stay away this long...until he knew she would not be safe, and tried to minimize the impact by hiring Jacob Phelps, aka Tom Keen, aka Christopher Hargrave.
And to be completely just: there would be no The Blacklist unless we have Red and Liz and their relationship being exactly what it is. If one part of the fandom blames Liz for all the betrayal she inflicted on Red, after all the times he proved he loves her and protecte her, and the other blames Red for ever entering Liz' life, the truth is exactly in the middle of all that; the coin has two sides, but we could only see both if the coin is resting on its' edge. The MO of the show is that we can not be only team Red or team Liz, we should be both, because there is no team Red without Liz, no team Liz without Red. It is either both of them or none at all.
Right now we are through the middle of season 8, with sure knowledge of season 9, which was never declared to be the last. And the MO stays the same: we get to know who Red is=end of story. So Liz will find out that the Witch was not her Mother before season 8 is over. She will continue trying to solve the mystery of who Red is and why he plays such a huge part in her life. The hunt for the blacklisters will continue, and Liz will continue searching not just for Red's true identity, but also for her own.
"Our journey isn't over yet. You may have given up on us, but I haven't". Red will never give up on Liz, and Liz will keep searching, making mistakes, trusting the wrong people, hurting Red and coming back, blaming him, and then seeing parts of the truth, but the journey will continue until we all arrive to the point when the mystery will be revieled. Until then it is a difficult and long path of two people to each other, and at the same time to the core of who each of them really is individually.
PS: to those who say that Red and Anne having sex "kill Rederina": guys, that is what identity change is all about, you have to act like the person you impersonate; if you impersonate a man, have sex with a woman, or your disguise is burnt. And, come on, Katarina was shown to be bisexual, and Red too is bisexual, and SEX REALLY IS NOT ABOUT GENDER OR IDENTITY AT ALL, it is about pleasure any person could make any other person expirience in full. All that is needed is the desire to do so!
PPS: Liz needs her Mother. I will stay and see the story through just to see her finally being reunited with Her, or finding out that her Mother never abandoned her and was there for her the entire time Red reentered her life! No matter how many seasons it will eventually take, but that is all there is to it. I am there for the Reveal. Not for the audience, for Liz!
#Misere #Season 8 #Episode 14 #Liz Keen #Red #Raymond Reddington #Tom Keen #Mr Kaplan #Sam #Rederina #choosing the way #a personal take on the last seen episode #and on team Red #and team Liz #which in fact is the same #put the coin on its edge #to observe both sides #objectively #Anne 😭
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The mark: Neville or Constantin
Red: A confluence of peril had entered your life, and I wanted to be within reach, to have influence.
I started theorizing Tom’s character in 2x19 due to Red’s confluence of peril reference. imo, a second “unknown” employer for Tom was introduced in that moment.
Red: The secrets she took with her could compromise any number of players on that map. They’ll be coming. They’ll be coming for you.
In Arioch Cain (3x5), the enemy coming for Masha branched off. It’s my opinion that Red was preparing for a war against Neville Townsend up until the moment he received the “Rostova” painting, but once he received the painting, knew that it was Constantin Rostov coming for her. imo, those “secrets” Red spoke to in 3x11 would be the secrets contained in the Sikorsky Archive that Katarina stole in 1990.
Red: As I feared would happen, elements from Katarina’s past are circling Elizabeth like a pack of wolves in the night. I put Tom Keen in her life to keep an eye on her, and he married her.
Kate: This isn’t about Tom Keen. It’s about your need for control.
Red: Indeed. I need to control the danger to Elizabeth. I’ve built a vast criminal network predicated on that very principal. It’s time to live up to my mission statement.
In 4x17, Red connected Tom to Katarina in his own dialogue. One must consider her deceased since 1990 given her fake death and change of identity. That’s why her name had been lost to history.
Red: Katarina Rostova was a name that had been lost to history.
To connect Tom to Katarina Rostova specifically, he had to be connected to her through someone or something that existed up to but not surpassing 1990. The only thing I saw (at any time throughout the series) connecting Tom to the past was the mark in his go-box. This mark immediately connected him to the night of the fire because the mark had to be there in order to scar her.
Forget about Berlin. He had NOTHING to do with Red's surrender.
What I'm stuck with now, is choosing which of these two men Tom worked for because both are directly connected to Katarina Rostova, while only one was said to be the reason Red turned himself in.
Constantin Rostov vs Neville Townsend
1. Both connect to Katarina Rostova in 1990 (or prior to).
Katarina: Seeing Masha with Constantin makes me think of my own father. I wonder what he would say now about the choices I’ve made.Look at me - in love with the man I was sent to seduce and betray. An American. Raymond wants me to run, take Masha and disappear with him. But how could I do that to her? She’s my entire life. She’s everything.
Woman: N-13 is an operative. The “N” stands for “neopoznanny,” the Russian word for “unidentified.” 13 represents the 13 packets of intel he stole from Lubyanka Square in 1990.
2. Both could’ve been at the fire, but I lean toward Neville.
Kirk: Do you know what I’m thinking, Raymond? That house by the water, holding a gun in your mouth… I should have pulled the trigger.
Kirk: One day I came home, and you were gone. He’d taken you. I never thought I’d ever see you again… until there you were - in the news, you… and Reddington - the most wanted fugitives in the world.
While Constantin spoke of the house by the water, he never thought he’d see Masha again after she was abducted, which means he didn’t see her after she was taken from the campus. He could’ve went after Reddington at the beach house at any time prior to that.
Katarina: Listen, carefully - you stay here with Masha. Speak to no one. Do not answer the door or the telephone. Don’t go out unless you absolutely have to. Listen. When it’s safe, I’ll call with instructions. I’ll ring once, hang up, and call back. Understand? Lock the door behind me.
Katarina's actions at the motel room with Kate gave off the impression that she and Masha were already being tracked by someone even though the motel was an hour’s drive away from the fire.
Either one could’ve scarred Masha, but I have a hard time believing Constantin left both Katarina and Masha at the fire. I believe he would’ve waited for them to exit the beach house and made sure they got home safely.
3. Masha’s paternity and the fabricated DNA report.
In 1x22, Tom whispered to Liz that her father’s alive. Despite what many believe, he had no idea Raymond Reddington was her father. I believe he was speaking of Constantin Rostov.
Kirk: I had proof that she was my daughter. A DNA test.
Red: You saw what Katarina wanted you to see. She lied to you about everything.
If Neville is connected in any way to Constantin, the KGB, Moscow, or perhaps even a Russian official, he may have been given a copy of Rostov’s fabricated DNA report. Constantin had reason to believe he was the father because Red told him Katarina fabricated it. Either way, either of these two men could’ve given Tom a copy of Kirk’s fabricated DNA report, but I don’t believe it was in Kirk’s SVR file. Neville would have to believe Constantin was the father, despite the possibility of him questioning Masha’s paternity after the fire.
4. The Russian connection.
Gina Zanetakos, Berlin and fake Berlin, Constantin and his possible fake are all of Russian descent. If Neville connects through Russia, he could be connected to one or all of these characters. Same can be said of Constantin. If Tom was employed by either one, they could be how he connects to all of these characters.
Tom: Did the same thing last month. It’s probably why you don’t recognize me. Constantin. Berlin, man, he’s tough. I had to get away for a while, go to Germany, figure a few things out.
Constantin: I come here for the peace and quiet.
Tom: Sure. Sorry. Gosh, you know, I just thought maybe you could help me.
Man: He said to piss off, pal.
Tom: Just take a minute.
Constantin: I don’t know who that is.
Tom: I think you do. Why don’t you take another look?
5. The Drexel painting, the blood pool, and the Devry map.
While it's hard to say what woman commissioned the painting of Masha Rostova on behalf of Alexander Kirk, it could've been anyone. Gina, Odette, and Scottie are my suspects. I'm not even sure the woman who commissioned the painting is relevant at this point, only that Kirk was the one who had it sent to Red.
What I am interested in is the Devry map and the message Red sent in blood in Arioch Cain. If he were doing as I believe - preparing for a war against The Townsend Directive in 3x12, then I believe his message in that blood pool in Arioch Cain was directed toward Neville. Because Neville could be connected to Constantin, he may have reached out and waited to see if Constantin would force Katarina to surface. After all, Constantin had no idea his wife was a KGB agent, so it's likely he had no idea she had a bounty on her head.
The Devry map makes more sense for Neville because of the parallels they’ve thrown in to the Fulcrum and the Cabal with that Sikorsky Archive. I'd expect Cabal’s competition to be much larger and consider the Townsend Directive a better fit for actual competition against them. And as I’ve said before, the way Red spoke of those secrets Katarina took with her fits more in line with Neville than Rostov. He was after a woman he believed could save his life, not secrets Katarina had. If Constantin had no idea his wife was a KGB agent, he’d have no idea she took these secrets with her anyway. Certainly not secrets that could compromise any number of players on the map. It just fits more in line with Neville.
6. Tom’s three passports.
Either Neville or Constantin could've issued those three passports Red mentioned in 1x18 and Liz questioned him about in S2. imo, he lied about Red issuing those passports.
Red: Lizzy, I’ve been monitoring Tom since he entered your life. About a year ago, I discovered that he had purchased three passports from a trusted forger I use in Warsaw.
Liz: Can you be honest about the passports?
Tom: The passports?
Liz: They’re real - Government issue. Where’d you get them?
Tom: Berlin had a guy.
Liz: I guess not.
Tom: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I can’t. Not about this.
Liz: That’s not how the truth works. You don’t get to pick and choose. Not if you want to learn how to swim.
Tom: I’ve been thinking about what you said – About needing to tell you the truth. So I’m gonna tell you the truth.
Liz: I don’t understand.
Tom: The passports - The passports came from Reddington.
What it would look like....
Red told Liz in the pilot, “Someone tried to hurt you.” Liz herself made several mentions to the idea that she got the scar from her father. This could speak to either Raymond or Constantin. However, if she’s getting the roles reversed in her head (as Dr. Orchard spoke of in 2x10), it could’ve been anyone.
Constantin
If employed by Constantin Rostov, would simply appear that he was trying to reunite Masha with a man he believed to be her real father. He’s a quick and easy connection, but he’d need to be the reason Red reentered Liz’s life when he did. Did Red kneel on the seal because he saw this mark and connected it to Constantin Rostov? I doubt it. Red's pre-pilot scene with Kate in 4x17 came off urgent and rather desperate. He considered this enemy an immediate threat.
Neville
I can’t even begin to describe how this looks in current story. Neville put a bounty on Katarina's head. He wanted her dead. Period. Setting up the woman from Paris (imposter Katarina) was done in an effort to protect Masha, so Dom felt she was in direct danger of Neville using her as leverage to get to Katarina.
Young Dom: Do you know they’ve assembled a directive? The Russian Vory, KGB, the Americans - her enemies - have pooled their resources and put a bounty on her head. They’re calling it the Townsend Directive.
Young Ilya: Neville Townsend?
Young Dom: He’s at the top of a very long list of people who want her dead.
Young Ilya: Are you worried they’ll find you?
Young Dom: I’m worried they’ll find Masha, try and leverage her.
Young Ilya: Look, Dom, I - I can’t help you.
Young Dom: You made a promise! To Katarina. You told her you would look after Masha if anything happened to her.
Young Ilya: Yes, but I can’t call off Townsend. And he will not stop looking.
Young Dom: Sure, he will. He’ll stop looking. And so will the rest of them if Katarina’s dead.
Young Dom: He’ll never stop. And instead of protecting my granddaughter, we’ve put a target on her back.
Young Ilya: Oh, stop using the child as an excuse! This was about you, Dom.
Young Dom: This was about Masha!
In seeing Tom with this mark, Red would see Neville in Masha’s life and consider her in immediate danger because Neville would use her as leverage. This would give him enough reason to turn himself in.
If he's connected to the mark in Tom's box, Neville was introduced in the very pilot and had been discussed several times since then.
Red: But if I die you’ll never know the truth about your husband.
Red: You’ve discovered something curious about your husband, haven’t you, Lizzy?
Red: Tell me about your husband. Does he know you as well as you know him?
Does he know about you as a child? Does he know about the fire?
Red: Right now, the only thing that matters is the immediate threat - your husband - finding out who he is and who he works for. The rest will come. I promise you.
If he's connected to the mark, in framing Red and Gina with it, Tom removed his own association to Neville and made it appear as though Red and Gina were assisting Neviille in finding and killing her mother.
Red: God willing, Katarina’s daughter will live a private life of quiet courage. But if anyone learns her identity, the only way I can stop the threats from rising is to rise up as a greater threat than all of them.
Liz already sought revenge against Red for Tom's death in S5. In 8x4's sneak peek, she's having pretty little flashbacks of Tom proposing to her on the pier in S3. She pulled Tom's go-box from her vent in S7. There are parallels to future episodes from what I've seen of audition spoilers, so Tom's box continues to play into the storyline through dialogue. There have been numerous mentions to him throughout the series since his death in S5. In current storyline, imagine what it would look like for Liz to be seeking revenge against Red for killing a woman she believes is her mother, only to turn around and find out that her dead husband worked for the very man who put a bounty on her mother's head.
Red: I turned myself in to the FBI to point you toward a truth that inevitably you would have to discover for yourself.
If he's connected to the mark, Neville Townsend and Tom’s connection to him was the truth Red was trying to point Liz to from the very beginning. The very man who would’ve scarred her at the fire, which would've given him reason to question her about it in the pilot.
Red: Someone tried to hurt you.
Even better if I’m right about Liz’s second memory wipe and Tom was involved in Red’s Vanessa Cruz shooting. Because Red is Liz’s mother.
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October 25: 1x20 Court Martial
Now that Chopped is done I am free to watch TOS again. Today’s ep: Court Martial, a wonderful combination of two of my favorite things: Captain Kirk and Legal Stuff.
Look at that backdrop. I forgot how many Very 50′s backgrounds they had in this show.
The Intrepid is here for repairs! Such a lost opportunity to show more Vulcans in Starfleet.
I don’t entirely get why the Commodore has his own special transport pad. I guess it must allow him to beam himself places without the use of a ship but like... to where is he beaming?
Lol that absolutely terrible sailor suit outfit on the little girl. I can only assume it’s a school uniform as it’s the only thing she ever wears.
Can you believe how this whole episode is based, essentially, around allegedly broken regulations? I mean I know it’s more than that and they do a good job explaining why it’s bad to eject the pod early (”when there is no emergency”) but like, essentially, the underlying conditions of emergency are not in Kirk’s control. It’s possible to just skip officially calling the emergency while nevertheless acting in a way that is appropriate for an emergency, and so it comes down to “did he first declare the emergency officially and then act in accordance with the declared emergency or did he just skip the first step?” rather than “did he act too quickly?” since HE was the one who determined if the conditions warranted an emergency.
Having said all that I still don’t get what an ion pod is or where it was or why it had to be ejected at all. Or how Finney got out of the pod if it was ejected.
Vulcanian expedition?!?
Kirk’s default voice is just flirty; I’m sorry but it is. Even talking to his old school classmates, who are VERY quick to judge him harshly and hate on him, implying they were probably never friends, he’s All Charm by default. And he doesn’t drop the charm even when he starts politely fighting with them.
Bones using Jim to flirt--with Jim’s ex-girlfriend! “Did you see that guy over there, he’s pretty famous, and we’re friends!”
I love Areel Shaw and I’m just gonna say I think she’s my favorite Kirk girlfriend.
Charged with culpable negligence. As opposed to...not culpable negligence?
When he was a midshipman...
What’s with all these professor & student friendships??
I cannot believe part of the Finney & Kirk backstory is that he literally named his daughter after Kirk. Like that’s so intense! I feel like it kind of changes everything but I can’t entirely untangle how.
This “I can’t believe you filed a report about my error” backstory is literally the beginning of STID except Kirk is the Spock of this scenario.
Star Trek: Law and Order. Bum bum.
This whole idea of pitting Kirk against a computer is clever in that people to this day are like “but computers are infallible?” but also dumb because Kirk >>> Computer obviously.
Having drinks with the ex and he turns the charm up to 11.
All of this is wildly unethical, from her telling him about the prosecution’s case, to her BEING the prosecution.
I actually read an article recently about this isn’t, or shouldn’t be, her job as prosecutor, to drum him out of the service in disgrace. Her job should be to find the truth in a more neutral way.
Wtf are all these totally useless federal reporters doing here?
I’m a pro-book person but this is a HILARIOUS anti-computer speech. Like--the law is in the computer dude! It is! It’s the same law as in the books. Intergalactic Westlaw is available to you. And then he goes off on this weird rant about Moses, like--dude, Moses isn’t in the reporters OR Westlaw OR whatever Starfleet code is actually at issue here.
Kirk likes him though.
Shaw in the dress uniform with the long skirt hot damn.
Not even the computer can pronounce Spock’s full name. And he’s been demoted again.
Vulcanian Scientific Legion of Honor.
Spock isn’t having any of this. “I don’t dispute it. I just... actually I do dispute it because it’s nonsense.”
His entire testimony is the equivalent of “You don’t have all the facts.” / “Which are?” / “I love him.”
The defense doesn’t need to question him because he’s already testified for the defense.
This is such a hilarious use of McCoy. For the first time ever we’re told he’s actually a psychologist on top of being a surgeon and GP and then his whole testimony isn’t even really medical? It’s just like wild speculation, which being a doctor and an “expert in psychology” somehow qualifies him to provide?
I love how Kirk’s service record just goes on and on and on. Areel doesn’t do herself any favors objecting to it; that just draws attention to it. As the defense lawyer knows by insisting it continuing and then cutting it off for being comically long.
Kirk: “I can be level-headed in an emergency. This wasn’t my first rodeo.”
This chair design is SO BAD. I know it needs to be like this for the plot but omg putting the pod release button on the chair at all (like does the captain have to jettison pods a lot?) and then especially directly under the red alert button, and then putting both of them just out there without any kind of cover or anything--that’s just waiting for someone to lean on his chair arm and make a deadly mistake.
Also nothing else is even labeled lmao.
This is a very impressive deep fake.
This whole ion storm does not really seem like a scary emergency situation lol. It seems like Kirk and everyone else are basically keeping their heads.
“You may be able to beat your next Captain at chess” Kirk as chess master confirmed.
“I didn’t realize how close you and my father were even though I was literally named after you.”
Obligatory Bones accuses Spock of not caring about Jim scene.
“Why thank you, Doctor, my blood is very cold.”
I can’t believe Spock programmed the computer to play chess with him. Probably so he could practice for Jim.
The lawyer’s outfit is hilarious: little pocket for a pen in front. Is he... a civilian lawyer? Is that even allowed?
Here is talking about the Bible again. And the Magna Carta. First, it’s always funny when a bunch of real things are followed by some fake science fiction things. And second, he’s pretty obviously just talking about the Constitution, and like maybe a very tiny bit about the Magna Carta. There’s no right to counsel in the Bible.
Really glad to know the Martians care about the right to an attorney though. And that the Alpha 3 Colonies protect the right of confrontation.
I bet Spock is unimpressed with this Drama.
Why did they change out of their dress uniforms?
How convenient that Finney was one of only three people who could change the computer. I mean I guess this is a permissions thing--but why would the records officer have that? Not that I know what a records officer is.
“White noise device” you can’t fool me, that’s a microphone.
Also another hilarious use of McCoy. Do they really NEED the ship’s surgeon to put a microphone against people’s chests? “Don’t mind me, just stealing your heartbeats.”
Like the general concept of this is nifty story telling but some of the details are....uh.... funny.
Captain’s log: “We brought a young girl onto the ship even when it’s in a dangerous position so we could use her against her father.”
Finney really was playing the looooooong game of revenge lol. And yet it still doesn’t seem well thought out. What was the next part of his plan? Somehow get back OFF the ship once Kirk’s career is ruined, and then live the rest of his life under an assumed name? Never seeing his daughter again? No Starfleet career even though it’s allegedly so important to him? Seems a little bit like everyone loses.
Lol not letting Spock leave the bridge because the court martial’s not ever. “Sorry, we all might die, but court IS still in session.” Even though they ALREADY KNOW the alleged victim is still alive!
I love that Uhura is essential personnel. They didn’t keep the navigator on board, even though they apparently need one, but they did keep Uhura.
Oh no, Kirk’s flimsy shirt, falling apart again!
“Beaten and sobbing, Finney told me how to fix the ship.” Bitter much?
Kirk, being a badass, fixing the ship all by himself.
Honestly I just really love a narrative in which an upright man plays by the rules, does the right thing, and behaves in good faith and is ultimately vindicated and rewarded.
Now everyone agrees there’s no crime and thus no point to continuing the court-martial.
He’s defending Ben Finney! Good luck with that.
I love how Kirk’s face goes from full-on-romance to slightly-embarrassed-serious-Captain as soon as he remembers, hey, I really AM on the bridge!
“She’s a very good lawyer.” / “Obviously.”
This was such a good Kirk episode, both for showing off all his good qualities, and for getting some interesting insight into his character. He strikes me as the kind of person who, because he’s so by-the-book, and because he’s smart and successful, inspires jealousy in other people, and thus has a lot of strained acquaintanceships--like with the other men at the bar. But he also has these really, really strong friendships and relationships: Areel Shaw, Spock and McCoy, and even Finney. I feel like he’s probably rather awkward with most people, but then when the relationship is established, he’s ride or die. And, he doesn’t hold grudges. I don’t think he really knew how upset Finney was about what happened literally 10+ years ago--especially if he had any say at all about Finney serving on his ship, and I suspect he could have at least vetoed him. And even after Finney tried to disgrace him and then actually kill him, he still didn’t seem to upset about it, or about his lawyer turning around and defending Finney.
I think Kirk likes the military in part because it gives him this very strict set of rules about interacting with other people, so he doesn’t have to make up his own. I bet the intensity of the service also allows him to form these stronger relationships, which do seem to suit him better. And when he doesn’t have anything else to fall back on, he INVARIABLY pulls out the charm: he does it with old classmates, random 21st century pilots, immortal teenage girls, and actual love interests. It’s his default mode. I think that makes sense for someone who’s very ambitious, very precise, very nerdy, very rules-oriented, and whose default mode as a young man, by his own admission, was “grim.”
Wow it is so much later than anticipated... I need to get to sleep!
Next ep is Return of the Archons, which I’ve only seen once and don’t remember super well. I think it’s a ‘society ruled by computers’ thing, which is fine. Maybe not as much of a classic as some other S1 eps, but it should be fun anyway.
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Letting Go
Susan was the first. Then Peter. Then Edmund. Lucy held on the longest, but at some point, you have to grow up.
Written for Writer's Month Day 10: Dark AU.
Note: I do not own The Chronicles of Narnia.
Read it on Ao3.
Susan was the first to leave Narnia behind. She was always quiet when the other siblings discussed the adventures and lessons they’d had. Peter thought she might resent that their younger siblings got a third trip while she was expected to stay behind and grow up. Edmund suspected she was frustrated at returning to being a child after living as a queen with the power to protect and make changes to an entire country. Lucy believed she had loved Narnia and its people too much, and the loss was something she’d never come to terms with.
The others tried to tactfully bring it up a few times, but Susan always dismissed them.
“It was a fun game when we were younger, but at some point you need to stop playing pretend and face the reality in front of you.” She frowned. “Magical lions and fauns and dwarves don’t pay the bills or solve the world’s problems. Our lives aren’t a fairy tale. They never have been. I think it’s time you stop pretending that they were.”
They decided not to mention Narnia around her after that. She continued believing she was fine and happy, and maybe she was, but Lucy always felt sad when she saw glimpses of Queen Susan the Gentle and had to hold her tongue.
-----
Peter was the next to forget. He and Susan had always been close and visited each other regularly. Perhaps he had gotten tired of tiptoeing around her and thought Narnia was an easier sacrifice than time with his sister. Edmund suspected he hadn’t quite grasped the “know me in this world” lesson from his final trip, and Lucy worried his stubbornness outweighed his ability to see the truth.
“Susan’s right,” Peter explained, “it’s time to put our childish games behind us. Honestly, I’m a bit ashamed it took me so long. I don’t regret it, though. It was a brilliant game.”
For a while, they tried to convince him of the truth. He was often good-natured about it, recalling memories and musing over their decisions as sovereigns, but he was always distant.
“We had amazing imaginations, didn’t we? I don’t think any of our school chums created entire countries and contemplated international relations during their holidays.”
Edmund and Lucy would agree, but they could tell their elder brother had convinced himself it was all a game. Eventually they found it easier not to mention Narnia at all rather than listen to Peter and Susan treat it so trivially.
-----
Edmund took much longer to forget. Lucy wondered if it was because he got to go a third time, but he had always been apt to trust her after their time with Professor Kirke. Plus Eustace shared some of their memories, and he and Edmund got along incredibly well. But eventually he drew his sister aside and told her he was done.
“I’m sorry Lucy, but I don’t think I can pretend like this anymore.” His eyes were dark and sad. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot and talking with Peter and Susan. We’re worried. That time we were with the professor was rather traumatic, and we were young. We used Narnia as a coping mechanism, but we have to work through the trauma at some point to heal and move on. I’ve been seeing a therapist, and if you’d like, I can give you some recommendations.”
“But what about the second time, with Caspian? Or the Dawn Treader with Eustace?” she asked. It had hurt when Susan and Peter forgot, but Edmund had been a steady and sure presence by her side. How could he lose Narnia, too?
“The war had just ended, we were transitioning back to school, and we were travelling, which is always stressful. And then next summer we were forced to endure our relatives while the other two were adventuring in America. Remember how beastly Eustace used to be?”
“So you think we made up Mr. Tumnus? The White Witch? Caspain and Reepicheep?”
“It’s not impossible. Some children have been known to hold on to their imaginary friends into early adulthood.”
“And Aslan?” Lucy asked, heart breaking. Her brother had the decency to smile sadly and squeeze her arm sympathetically.
“If Aslan was as benevolent as we believed, would he have allowed me to betray you all and grapple with that guilt afterwards? Or let us grow up as kings and queens and then rip that away from us? Or wait to summon us again until all of our old Narnian friends were dead? You have to admit, some of that is pretty messed up. It’s easier to explain as the imaginings of traumatised children than the machinations of a supposedly good all-powerful lion.”
He was doing his best to be kind. She knew he had probably weighed this over and over for months, maybe years. Edmund was driven towards the truth, so it was even harder to fathom that he was turning his back on it. When they parted ways, Lucy had never felt so lonely.
-----
Lucy tried holding on for another two years. She’d stopped mentioning Narnia to her siblings, and they had the decency not to pester her about it, but it was too painful to be the only one who remembered. She limited their interactions, though it only made her lonelier.
Sometimes she spoke with Eustace and Professor Kirke, and they introduced her to other people who claimed to know Narnia, but it was harder to find comfort in people she didn’t know. Edmund had said it would be easy for escapists to alter their remembered fantasies to fit the same or similar mold of another’s in an attempt to feel some connection to them. Other than Eustace, she didn’t share any actual memories with them, and the only real connections in all of their stories was Aslan.
It was Aslan who kept Lucy believing for so long. She felt he really could connect all of these people through a magical alternative world where they were capable of incredible things. She trusted Aslan, even if he wasn’t real. She’d looked for him in her own world as he’d asked, and she believed she’d found him in church.
Ironically, that was what finally made her turn her back on Narnia. If she’d found the true Aslan, she no longer needed childhood fairy tales to show her the truth. Maybe it had just been a way for a young girl to try and make sense of her circumstances.
There was a great sadness when she finally let go. Lucy would always think of Narnia with fondness and nostalgia, but it was relieving to understand at last what her siblings seemed to have figured out earlier. Narnia was a game that had helped them through a strangely stressful and magical time of their lives. Now that she could face the reality of those experiences, she was closer than ever to her siblings. They were finally on the same page.
-----
Three months after Lucy came to this conclusion, the Pevensie siblings received word of a tragedy. Their cousin Eustace, Professor Kirke, and a few of their friends whom Lucy had met died tragically in a train crash. It was a shock to them all. Edmund and Lucy took their cousin’s death particularly hard. But they mourned and moved on. They had jobs to do, bills to pay, and lives to live.
“I wish we could have done more for them,” Susan sighed over dinner a few years later. They were revisiting childhood memories, and Narnia had come up for the first time in a while. “They were all convinced that it was more than a game.”
“I talked to Eustace a few times about it,” Edmund admitted. “He believed Narnia and Aslan were the reason he changed. He didn’t think he was capable of doing so on his own.”
“Poor Eustace,” Lucy sighed. “If only he’d believed in himself more. I should have encouraged him more than I did, made him feel appreciated.”
“And the professor,” Peter agreed. “He wasn’t altogether there in the head, but he made our time with him jolly good. I wish I’d talked to him more before the end.”
“Well we still have Mrs. Macready,” Susan chuckled. The others laughed.
“I don’t think any imaginary fantasyland will let us escape from her!” Peter grinned.
I don’t know if this really counts as a Dark AU, but the idea of all four Pevensies forgetting Narnia makes me really sad, so I’m saying it counts.
#writersmonth2019#gizka#my words#dark au#the chronicles of narnia#the pevensies#peter pevensie#susan pevensie#edmund pevensie#lucy pevensie#family#siblings#pevensie siblings
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STAR TREK Fic Rec
NR
A Moment From the Temporal War- https://archiveofourown.org/works/16592681
Complete, WC: 553
A tiny ficlet, more of a premise than a story. This is what happened when the Temporal Cold war from ENT erupted into open temporal warfare, as seen in the "Storm Front" two-parter.
Scenes from a Disaster Zone- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11311746
Complete, Bashir/Garak, WC: 6,861
This fic assumes an established relationship, begun soon after Julian joins Garak on Cardassia as part of the Federation aid effort. It is not ASIT-compliant, but is definitely influenced by it and all the other wonderful post-canon fics out there.
Of Stars and Plebes- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1899546/chapters/4094982
On Going, Kirk/Spock, WC: 40,318
James T. Kirk was not always the confident, swaggering Captain of the U.S.S Enterprise. Follow him as he makes his way through the halls of Starfleet Academy with his best friend Bones and lest we forget, an excruciatingly uptight Vulcan.
The Promise- https://archiveofourown.org/works/13877313/chapters/31926819
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 207,872
As children, Jim and Spock promised they would get married when they grew up. Jim thought it was just a silly joke between kids.When they meet again upon the Enterprise, Spock still expects Jim to fulfill that promise.
G
On Human Gestures- https://archiveofourown.org/works/10783569
Complete, WC: 757
A simple study of some of Spocks more human gestures and where he probably picked them up from.
Always Shall Be (2019)- https://archiveofourown.org/works/17766896
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 1,052
After Jim is brought back to life after Khan, he spends a short time in his recovery visiting Spock Prime.
Fallacies and Assumptions, Logical and Otherwise- https://archiveofourown.org/works/12863751/chapters/29380029
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 6,799
Spock must piece together fragments of memory to uncover the truth of who he was. He knows his own heart, but what about Jim's?
Graduate Vulcan for Fun and Profit- https://archiveofourown.org/works/17969
Complete, WC: 15,113
It really does take a village to raise a Jim.The members of the Kelvin's crew watch over Jim as much as he lets them.
I Will Have This- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14679873/chapters/33916410
Complete, Amanda/Sarek, Kirk/Spock, WC: 15,541
Just as she finished adding a small box of sweets to her items, she felt a tug on the sleeve of her robe. Turning, she had a smile prepared, and a praise on the tip of her tongue for whatever item her son had chosen. That turned into a sharp gasp when she realized that carefully ensconced in her son’s arms was not any item for sale in the shop, but a very human baby.
“Mother, I will have this.”
Nature Boy- https://archiveofourown.org/works/13499398/chapters/30958488
On Going, Kirk/Spock, WC: 25,361
The story of a young boy on an unfamiliar planet who makes friends with the trees.
No Vegas Wedding for Us- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14934444/chapters/34599873
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 28,919
Jim Kirk has loved Spock and pined after him throughout the entirety of their five-year mission. He thought, hoped and dared to believe that today, the day of their wedding, would be the happiest day of his life. But there's just one problem. Well, two problems. Okay, maybe three. Spock doesn't love Jim in return, the marriage is a sham, and now — as their wedding guests grow impatient and Jim's hope fades — Spock has gone missing.
Facing down a ticking clock, Starfleet's scrutiny, and profound misconceptions about each other's intentions, Jim and Spock had nine days to decide if the lie was worth it to keep Spock on the Enterprise. Now, it seems Spock has made that decision.
It Takes A Village- https://archiveofourown.org/works/8226730/chapters/18854419
Complete, WC: 33,227
Transporter malfunction turns Bones into a toddler. Can the crew keep him out of trouble, or will young Leonard McCoy be too much to handle?
out of obscurity into the dream- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11135340/chapters/25110768
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 87,794
Spock has lived an entire life in seclusion, brought up by a Romulan to believe he was one too. Convinced his telepathy was a rare gift that must be protected at all costs, he was prohibited to touch anyone and leave the house.
Jim Kirk comes across him accidentally after he was hired to steal a Vulcan artefact. Together, they start an adventure of finding a soulmate in each other and preventing another catastrophe from happening after the artefact turns out to be a part of an ancient psionic weapon.
Also known as “How I almost died three times in two days and found my soulmate”, an autobiography by J.T. Kirk.
T
A Logical Confession- https://archiveofourown.org/works/10631613
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 1,492
Spock confesses his love to Jim, in his own logical way.
Fic: Variable Meaning- https://flagrantialuna.livejournal.com/1058.html
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 4,239
The last thing Spock ever remembers is a mission going horribly wrong.
where the long shadows grow- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15878247
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 5,957
Spock, he thinks, should be fine. So long as he still rejected the Science Academy, and didn’t get assigned there again, and isn’t on leave to visit his parents, and --
His parents.
“Oh, Spock,” says Jim, into his knees. “S'ti th'laktra.”
He feels an echo in the back of his mind, endless sadness and grief.
Tick-Tock and Fizzbin- https://archiveofourown.org/works/5670571
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 7,916
When Hikaru Sulu came to visit Spock and Jim at the small house they had recently purchased, and presented to them an air-hole equipped box that emitted a yelping noise, Spock said quickly and loudly, without stopping to consider the consequences, "No."
Irak-nahan- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14824949
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 8,447
While on a simple diplomatic mission, Spock is attacked by an unknown force. It is up to Jim and McCoy to figure out who did it and why. The only issue is that there are plenty of suspects, but none of them are very suspect. It's a race, not against the clock, but against Spock's tolerance for the psychic pain he's being put through. Spock, meanwhile, is not only fighting the strange entity taking up residence in his mind, but also the feelings he has for his captain.
The Vulcan Bite- https://archiveofourown.org/works/13582686
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 8,720
When Pon Farr hits, Spock knows he must conceal himself in his quarters or risk his violent sex-fiend behavior ruining his career. While trying to check up on his friend, Jim is shocked that a hormone fueled Spock actually bites him.
He tries to conceal it and hopes it heals on its own. But what neither of them knows is that the Vulcan bite during Pon Farr can give the victim the exact hormones and symptoms of Plak Tow.
Only one thing can resolve their mutual fever.
Fulfilling the Needs of the One (Or the Both)- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1184912
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 8,754
Spock begins to wonder if his relationship with Jim has been one-sided in his own favor.
Five Years Gone- https://archiveofourown.org/works/12910674/chapters/29496396
Incomplete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 11,671
Jim was declared dead five years ago. Spock has been in command of Enterprise. The Enterprise is sent to Drozana Station (stolen from Star Trek Online because it's the perfect crappy space station for this story) to recover something Starfleet left behind.
What Spock doesn't know is that Jim's not dead, and it's going to be one hell of a reunion.
Nothing without you- https://archiveofourown.org/works/16649242
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 12,197
After the Fal-tor-pan, Spock finds himself bereft, confused and unable to define his relationship with his Captain and friend. Torn between a present he does not entirely belong to and a past he cannot fully comprehend, he struggles against his mind and the conflicting feelings drawing him to Jim.Does he dare reach for him? Can he find a way to bridge the distance between them? Will he remember the meaning of t'hy'la?
The Walls Between Us- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1114712
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 12,898
They have been imprisoned for thirteen hours, ten minutes, and forty-two standard seconds.
Adventure Is Out There- https://archiveofourown.org/works/7580593/chapters/17247538
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 12,922
Regardless of her feelings about parenthood, Winona will be dead before she leaves her last remaining link to George on Earth.
Jim is just the average, everyday, Starfleet-brat boy genius. His time is split between the mostly-Vulcan engineering crew and raising hell on the rest of the ship. If anybody (including Jim) knew the details of what occurred during his first trip to Vulcan, they wouldn't be surprised.
Acceptable Price- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14913896/chapters/34545332
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 14,636
In which Spock fights to the death for possession of the Enterprise crew and Jim finally admits (to himself) he might be feeling more than simple friendship for him. When Spock confronts him about his strange behaviour, the Captain has no choice but to risk it all and confess.
Just As The Twig Is Bent- http://ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=7061&warning=1
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 17,580
Oh, I wonder what's going to become of that boy! I just don't know …”
James Kirk felt the flame of anger in his cheeks as he listened to his mother complain and whine to the Imperial guards who had brought him home.
The Gravity of Never Letting Go- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14847870/chapters/34370529%E2%80%9D%20target=
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 20,230
After George dies and the Kelvin is destroyed, Winona is left out in the black with a newborn and a choice: go home, or run away from her problems. The consequence for her decision go beyond anything she could have imagined.
Accustomed to slightly lower then natural gravity aboard Federation vessels, an extended stay on Earth is a death sentence for Jim. But he's not going to let that stop him.
Not This Time- https://archiveofourown.org/works/7991806/chapters/18290599
Complete, Amanda/Sarek, Kirk/Spock, WC: 28,432
The crack of rock startled Spock, causing him to bark for a status update from Chekov. He wrapped an arm around his mother’s waist, fingers gripping hard enough that he hoped he wouldn’t bruise his human parent. And then the ground gave way. Distantly, the words, “I’m losing them, I’m losing them!” echoed from the communicator clipped to his belt.
White surrounded them, and he felt himself falling . . .
The Captain and his Hawke- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15409014
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 35,265
Two cursed lovers, never and always touching and touched, as long as the sun rises and sets, as long as there is day and night and for as long as they both shall live.
An irreverent young thief, constantly running for his life, the one and only who knows his way inside the holy Cathedral of Aquila .A mysterious Captain, travelling only by daylight with a black hawk upon his shoulder, intent on exacting a terrible vengeance. An ethereal, sorrowful Vulcan whose sun is the moon and who can tame wolves, gliding through the night forest like a ghost.The Bishop who once desired him, and who now seeks to destroy him.
A bond that is slowly falling apart...
Spaceships, Private Jets, and Minivans: How to Start a Global Incident in 5 Minutes Flat- https://archiveofourown.org/works/9338150/chapters/21159536
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 49,227
One early summer morning in Riverside, Iowa, a spacecraft crash lands into the backyard of a highschooler by the name of James T. Kirk.
Earth history is changed forever.
Closet Key- https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8476056/1/Closet-Key
Complete, WC: 61,639
In a universe where Vulcan is pre-warp and Jim is still prone to causing trouble, what trouble can a little crash landing cause? How did Jim end up in a ship alone? And what about Spock? Do these two hold the key to each others troubles? Or can they only make things worse?
Written in the Stars- https://archiveofourown.org/works/3558830?view_full_work=true
Incomplete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 67,532
A collection of space husbands short stories ranging from the five year mission to old married bliss. <3 Each chapter can be read as a stand-alone work.
Refuge- https://archiveofourown.org/works/7760779/chapters/17697628
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 70,138
In a less powerful, less united Federation, Romulus takes an opportunity to attack Vulcan and Federation planets begin taking in Vulcan refugees. One of these refugees, a young Spock, stays with the Kirk family on their farm in Iowa. Everyone thinks it's temporary, but after a few years Earth becomes as much a home to Spock as Vulcan ever was, and the Kirks-- especially Jim-- become family
Iowa Loam- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11195496/chapters/25000587
Complete, WC: 77,912
Jim Kirk, age ten, and his friends battle the horrors of Romulans, early bedtimes, and annoying girls. AU: set when the Federation is just being formed.
All In- https://archiveofourown.org/works/12987213/chapters/29693286#workskin
Complete, Kirk/Spock, Scotty/Uhura, Coral Marcus/Bones, WC:87,831
Jim opens his eyes. Spock’s face is calm. It’s like they’re not talking about what they’re talking about at all - a living, breathing entity that’s made up of parts from both of them. She’s her own individual, sure, but they’re the ones who made her.
And Bones.Bones had something to do with it. Jim’s red blood and Spock’s green blood and this steady, soothing heartbeat.
Plugged In- https://archiveofourown.org/works/3401606/chapters/7446449
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 93,519
Spock creates a videogame in an attempt to study humans to determine if they are ready for first contact. With the new opportunity to interact with the new species, he joins the game to study them first hand.
Jim catches wind of a strange NPC that hangs out in the IDIC tavern in ShiKahr. Everyone thinks it's defective, but Jim thinks it might be a secret event and talks to him. He's strange, and he's kind of cute in a weird way. Starfleet starts getting wind that the game might be controlled by people not of Earth origin, and they begin to question the creators' motives. Will Jim choose Starfleet, a faction he had sworn his life and loyalty too, or a man he had never even met face to face?
The Button- https://archiveofourown.org/works/7824229/chapters/17859643
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 105,505
In a life tainted by magic and evil, Jim makes his way from a young age as the apprentice of a powerful medium and her monster slayer husband (though a lot of his training seems to revolve around fetching rare and expensive liqueur...).
Eventually, the stars begin calling to him, whispering of an unnatural enemy. Something will have to be done about that. Something will also have to be done about the stubborn Vulcan who thinks one shared childhood adventure makes them friends.
Before all that, though, Jim finds a peculiar key.
RESTORE, REMAKE, & REBUILD- https://archiveofourown.org/works/16186019/chapters/37823240
Ongoing, Bashir/Garak, WC: 107,034
Eight years after the Dominion War, Dr. Bashir--rather afflicted, unfortunately--is en route to Cardassia Prime. Meanwhile, Garak has re-established himself as a politician of note, and his methods may be a point of contention. Further still, Kira reflects on her role keeping the "family" together, Ezri ponders conventional Federation ethics, Miles ruminates on lessons hard-learned, Keiko benefits from being treated like a major character, and the shadow of Enabran Tain looms over a world in recovery.
100 Words- https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12174343/1/100-Words
Incomplete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 133,324
"I want this, okay? I'm just not used to it and I'm not entirely convinced it won't end in an ugly, painful mess, but I want to try it!" Spock was absolutely enraptured, his free hand was trembling on his thigh where he was keeping it to prevent it from latching itself on the human's psy-points all of its own accord… "I am willing to try if it's with you."
M
Letters from the Northern Continent- https://archiveofourown.org/works/45841
Complete, Bashir/Garak, WC: 7,966
It just figured that the first time Julian Bashir set foot on Cardassia after the war, it would be halfway around the world from Elim Garak.
Kirk and the Friend Problem- https://archiveofourown.org/works/12087084/chapters/27395046
Incomplete, WC: 13,611
The problem starts in the Starfleet Academy and doesn't end when Jim goes off into space.
Condemnation- http://www.memory-prime.de/elizabethhelena/Condemnation.html
Complete, Bashir/Garak, WC: 14,554
"Post-'The Wire,' pre-'Our Man Bashir,' when the guys are still having lunch regularly, Julian finds out about something Garak has done, something worse than he ever thought or could have imagined." Can you now see why this story has NGHE?
Bonds of Blood- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1097988
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 17,627
Spock is renowned throughout the forge as a merciless warrior, but Jim knows him only as the coward who killed his brother.
Especially the Lies- https://archiveofourown.org/works/16584785/chapters/38866268
Complete, Bashir/Garak, WC: 23,673
It started out as a simple lie. He should have known better than to get involved in a lie with Elim Garak.
On the Arrow- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11243349/chapters/25129032
Complete, Kirk/Spock, Scotty/Uhura, WC: 26,736
After receiving the serum made from Khan’s super-blood, Jim is unsure of his place in the world. Escaping a destroyed San Francisco, he travels back to Riverside to re-evaluate his future. When his first officer unexpectedly arrives on his doorstep, Jim is reminded just how much he wants Spock to be a part of it.
Entering Orbit- https://archiveofourown.org/works/864225/chapters/1657428
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 30,957
Jim escapes to Iowa to avoid the media frenzy following the Narada incident, but a late-night miscommunication results in Spock turning up on his front porch.
...And Always Shall Be- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14901614/chapters/34514093
Incomplete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 33,158
Spock hesitates only a second longer, then presses his palm to the door and it slides open. He anticipates and receives Jim into his embrace, allowing his t’hy’la to bury his face in Spock’s neck.
“Sorry. I didn’t…I wasn’t sure where to go. I needed you,” Jim says, gasping through his emotions.
After 11 years apart, Jim and Spock finally find their way to each other.
/lost+found- https://archiveofourown.org/works/8676292/chapters/19890799
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 37,960
Spock is the first Vulcan at Starfleet Academy, and Starfleet Academy is the first time Spock has been on Earth for an extended period of time. He hopes to find a place where his status as half-human isn't looked down upon so harshly, and tries to adapt to human life and human values.Then he meets some cadets who are willing to adapt to him.
They'd call us star-crossed (If they called us at all)- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15648153/chapters/36343638
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 38,479
He plucked a star from the sky and gave me back the sun
In which Spock has to come to terms with the terrible loss of his entire planet and Jim does his best to help him heal.
This is the story of how they came to be what they are - the best Command team in the Fleet - and how they found the strength and courage to trust each other completely. The story of the birth of t'hy'la.
Foundations- https://archiveofourown.org/works/333518/chapters/538714
Complete, Kirk/Spock, Kirk/Gary, WC: 44,819
Amanda only wanted what was best for her son, and after Sarek’s death, she was certain that Vulcan was not it. However, she had never expected it to be Iowa either, or rather, a poor little boy from Riverside.
To Be Wed- https://archiveofourown.org/works/10898799/chapters/24227988
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 49,610
"With a human ruling alongside King Sarek, it makes sense that they would want a Vulcan to rule alongside you. Look on the bright side. At least it's not Sybok."
Prince S'chn T'gai Spock and Crown Prince Sam Kirk are pushed by their families into an awkward courtship, sure to become an awkward marriage. Meanwhile, the younger Terran prince just wants to make sure his future brother-in-law feels comfortable in his new home. But unfortunately for Jim, the road to hopeless, unrequited love is paved with good intentions.
Hidden Realities- https://ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=2558&warning=1
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 50,498
Jim resumes command of the Enterprise for a difficult mission, and miscommunication abounds. A direct sequel to “Frozen Memories.”
Malleus Maleficarum- https://archiveofourown.org/works/7846546/chapters/17915866
Ongoing, Kirk/Spock, WC: 51,329
In the summer of 1976, a man with pointed ears moved into the old abandoned Grayson house up on the hill just north of town. Right around the same time, strange things started happening in Riverside—even stranger than when Amanda Grayson mysteriously disappeared back in 1948. Jim Kirk has always wanted to know the truth. Leonard McCoy just wants to make it through the summer alive.
Thy Soul, Alight In The Dark- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15327285/chapters/35561382
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 51,686
When disgraced former Starfleet captain and current salvage runner James T. Kirk stumbles upon what appears to be an abandoned Vulcan research vessel on the edge of Federation Space, he thinks he’s finally found some luck. The state of the ship and the fate of her original crew however, turn what was supposed to have been a standard day’s work into something quite a bit stranger. As Kirk and his crew debate if they can—or should—wake a sleeping survivor, it soon becomes clear that the nightmare is just beginning.
Only Fools- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013237/chapters/2011855
Complete, Kirk/Spock, Kirk/Gary, Scotty/Uhura, WC: 62306
Spock has just graduated with highest honors from the Vulcan Science Academy when Nero destroys his planet. Lucky to escape with his life, he is bound for Earth on a rescue ship where he meets a strange fellow traveler: an elder version of himself. Disturbed by his counterpart's experiences in his own timeline, Spock vows never to follow the desires of his human half. But when a man named Jim Kirk comes into Spock's life, he's faced with a struggle to find the balance between Vulcan and human.
The Wall- https://archiveofourown.org/works/13737003/chapters/31562937
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 89,421
Following the events of the Halka Incident, the Enterprise returns to Earth where a massive investigation awaits. They must face inevitable changes a trip to the parallel universe brought and prevent another disaster from happening: they brought back an instruction on how to create the Tantalus Field, and you can't really expect people to sit idly once learning this, right?
But for Kirk, saving Spock may become a number one priority.
Finding Spock- Part 1- https://archiveofourown.org/works/9820079/chapters/22049192
Complete, Kirk/Spock, Spock/Uhura, Spock/TPring, WC: 199,758
Spock is as Vulcan as they come. Or not. Struggling with isolation, his natural emotions and his need to be a true Vulcan, he somehow builds a life at Starfleet Academy. Follow his life from his childhood to his spiritual homecoming on the Enterprise.
THE SUM OF BOTH OF US- https://archiveofourown.org/works/883469/chapters/1701844
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 207,623
Jim Kirk is nine when a massacre on Tarsus IV leaves him without a family and without a home. Spock is twelve when a strange boy in the desert saves his sehlat. Families aren't born; they're made. The look in mother’s eyes at his correction remained a mystery long after the colors of the night sky and the complex patterns of distant nebulae had become translatable by means of distinct and relatively straightforward equations.
Leave No Soul Behind- https://archiveofourown.org/works/187333/chapters/275539
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 258,951
If you're Starfleet, you spend your whole life wishing you never see an EPAS uniform right up until the moment they become your only hope. Whether you're dying a slow, cold death in space, or a long painful one on some godforsaken planet, they're going to come for you. So count your last breaths, son, and hold on tight. They leave no soul behind.
R/EX
Sure Thing- https://archiveofourown.org/works/731935
Complete,Kirk/Spock, WC: 5,120
So suddenly Kirk finds himself being courted by Spock... at first Kirk thinks it is Spock trying to mess with his mind because Spock is still pissed about the 'cheating' incident but is soon disabused of that notion and he finds himself in his first loving, committed relationship in his life.
Shelter- http://www.ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=689&warning=1
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 6,944
The stark peaks, gray sentinels of a cold world that had never known life, looked down indifferently as the three men in Starfleet uniforms came hurrying over the ridge.
One of a Kind- https://archiveofourown.org/works/48653
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 7,074
Three planets. All things rare and beautiful.
Everything but This- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15650613/chapters/36350709
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 11,043
And then they were standing in front of Cat’s Eye, and Spock was opening the door for Jim, and Jim stepped inside with a mild flirtation on his lips, but then the entire club went still, and Jim froze too, and all inhabitants were looking at them.
And, god help them, they were all vulcans.
--
A week ago, Jim kissed Spock. Now they're about to have their first shore leave together as...what, a couple? This could either be very awkward or very spicy. There's a good chance it might be both.
Designated- https://archiveofourown.org/works/15206531
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 11,304
“I would like you to read over the contract and consider what you are agreeing to before you sign,” Spock says, and reaches for the PADD on the table.
And because Jim is an absolute dipshit who thinks nothing through ever at all, he just shrugs and uses his fingers to scroll to the bottom, signs, and hits send.
In My Own Skin- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11399640
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 11,477
After the events of Turnabout Intruder, Jim is trapped in Janice Lester's body indefinitely and has to learn to carry on with his normal life and duties trapped in this body. Established relationship with Spock, but things become understandably difficult as a result of Jim's situation. Complicating matters even further, the Enterprise is assigned to a difficult diplomatic mission with a new member of the Federation.
Poses- http://www.ksarchive.com/viewstory.php?sid=691&warning=1
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 16,483
Consciousness approached as slowly as dawn on a misty world, bearing two vague impressions—one of pleasure and one of pain. The pain was a faint throbbing at the side of his head, rattling like a distant drum in time to his pulse. The pleasure was more immediate: a vastly comforting warm weight pressed beside and across him—unquestionably a friend.
One on a Side, Two Together- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11343174/chapters/25385205
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 17,108
A landing party almost never starts out as an obvious disaster.
A Crack in the Mirror- https://archiveofourown.org/works/11478597/chapters/25741107
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 19,765
Nearly two years after the events of "Mirror, Mirror", Mirror Spock returns with an unusual request.
In Another World- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14391432/chapters/33233040
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 20,796
Starfleet believed Jim Kirk was destined for command. Jim Kirk would prefer to leave his father's long Starfleet reputation behind him and dedicate himself to xeno-botany. Offered a position to work on hybrid plants on Vulcan, Jim is put into contact with a tutor, the blind xenolinguistics professor, Spock. It's only after meeting him that Jim realizes how he and Spock are connected, and why the Vulcan hates him so much.
But then fate has other ideas, and long after Jim leaves earth for Vulcan, they're thrown into each other's paths once again.
Gift- https://archiveofourown.org/works/982288/chapters/1934555
Complete, Amanda/Sarek, Kirk/Spock, Stonn/TPring, WC: 30,886
Spock gets a small golden-haired, blue-eyed creature as a gift from his father (except he doesn't). The creature speaks in his nurse's Secret Language, appears to be convinced that Spock is an "elf" and calls itself "Jim." Utterly fascinated, Spock decides to keep it.
Sviksu- https://anon-j-anon.livejournal.com/84524.html
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: +40,000
"There is a Vulcan by the name of S'chn T'gai Spock. His name is infamous in our history."
The World Well Lost- https://archiveofourown.org/works/14962537?view_full_work=true
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 42,811
When Jim and Spock meet as teenagers on Tarsus IV and endure unspeakable horrors together, it seems like nothing can separate them. Until, that is, Jim is forced to burn every last trace of himself from Spock’s mind to keep him safe. Years later, Jim is still a smoldering husk, but it seems amnesia has been good to Spock. To remind him of the world they built together before the famine—and of how it ended—would be too cruel. Wouldn’t it? But when Starfleet tasks the Enterprise with hunting Kodos down, old scars will be torn open and hidden secrets will come to light, forcing Jim and Spock to reconsider everything they thought they knew about their shared history on Tarsus IV.
Papers in the Roadside- https://archiveofourown.org/works/270668
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC:49.637
Jim owns a small bar in Chicago, keeps on picking up strays and taking care of everyone no matter how hard it makes his own life. Spock is a journalist writing feature articles for the Chicago Tribune; he depicts the world with uncanny skill, but hides more than one personal drama and is possibly under surveillance from the Vulcan royal family. They meet by accident just before their lives start to spin out of control.
Magpie- https://archiveofourown.org/works/338376/chapters/547603
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 57,648
Spock met Jim when he was 7 and Jim was 6. It has since been generally agreed that this was a mistake (or: the one where they grow up together and things are simultaneously better and worse for it).
a sequence that you never learned- https://archiveofourown.org/works/1077361/chapters/2164321
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 64,624
"'Spock,' Jim breathes out, completely overwhelmed by the gesture—not quite believing that Spock knows him so well, that's he's already started researching, that he trusts Jim with a member of his own endangered species."
When Jim gets it in his head to adopt an eight year old Vulcan, Spock presents a logical solution to the issue of Jim's humanity: marriage to a Vulcan citizen.
Kirk's War- https://archiveofourown.org/works/5135270?view_full_work=true
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 78,933
Sequel to Colony War. Not a stand-alone. Spock is recalled to Vulcan by his father and must face his family, changed by events. The war with the colonies is winding down but there are still serious issues within Starfleet Command that Kirk is determined to sort out.
Paper Tigers- https://archiveofourown.org/works/17001378/chapters/39967212
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 92,106
Thirty years ago, the war between Earth and Vulcan ended with a shaky armistice. Now, Earth's monarchs hope their volatile neighbors might formalize peace and ally with them against a growing Klingon threat. But Vulcans are fiercely independent, and are currently fighting their own war against a rebel insurgence. An alliance remains unlikely.
In spite of this, the two planets' sons, Prince James Kirk of Earth and Dorli Kahr-lan Spock of Vulcan, find themselves passionately drawn toward each other the moment they meet, and their own private alliance could change everything.
The Lotus Eaters- https://archiveofourown.org/works/277853/chapters/440466
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 93,594
Stranded on the planet Sigma Nox while searching for a missing away team, Spock and Kirk find themselves pitted against a disturbing native life form. With the captain out of commission on a regular basis and Spock struggling to preserve his stoicism, staying alive is difficult enough – but when a slim chance for escape surfaces, their resolve is truly put to the test. Together they must fight for survival in the heart of an alien jungle, and in the process, uncover the mystery of the planet’s past.
Take Refuge in What You Know- https://archiveofourown.org/works/715652/chapters/1324993
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 120,334
Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma."
Colony War- https://archiveofourown.org/works/4079998/chapters/9188761
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 134,709
Lt. Kirk has been given a simple mission, to clear a suspected rebel colony base. But his team fails him and Kirk must rely on his own daring and some unexpected help to save the mission. Relations between Vulcan and Earth are breaking down, threatening a three-way war. From his demoted position, Kirk must try and pull together his crew and repair a broken Federation.
Sha Ka Ree- https://archiveofourown.org/works/9488996/chapters/21471398
Complete, Kirk/Spock, WC: 180,505
The year is 2258. Jim Kirk is a Lieutenant on the U.S.S. Farragut, Spock the science officer of the U.S.S. Enterprise. When the ships come together for a priority landing party, these two strangers find themselves fighting against the odds for a chance at life in an alien world, and the only way they'll make it through is by relying on each other.
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⊱ Delicate ⊰
Prompt: “Do you even know what you've done to me?”
Fandom: Star Trek (AOS)
Pairing: Jim Kirk x Reader
Words: 2,319
Warnings: Language, mentions of sex
A/N: It’s an angsty one because I love drama. Sorry for any typos, it’s almost midnight while I’m rereading this and probably missed a few errors. Also, I will have a fluffy Jim Kirk story (bc I’m still not over him) up by next friday if I’m able to finish editing this weekend. For the meantime, enjoy!!
“You alright there, kid?” McCoy asked, tearing you away from the thoughts inside your head and bringing you back to reality. “What’s troubling you?”
Shrugging a shoulder, you picked up your PADD and resumed the work you were doing on there. This wasn’t the first time your boss had caught you staring off into the distance and you definitely knew this wasn’t going to be the last.
“It’s nothing,” you said, the lie easily rolling off your tongue. “You put me through back-to-back shifts and it’s wearing me out.”
“You sure? I mean, you’re the one who requested for longer hours but if it’s too much–”
You shook your head and gave him a tight-lipped smile. Ever since you joined the Enterprise, you found yourself being close to Leonard. He was good friend to you and you enjoyed working with the doctor when he’s not being his cantankerous self.
“No, I’m fine. I’ll get use to it,” you simply replied as your attention falls back to your device in hand.
“You’re not picking up more hours because you’re trying to avoid someone on the ship are you?”
You shot your eyes toward Leonard and chuckled nervously. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean.”
“I don’t know what you’re trying to say.”
Shifting uncomfortably in your seat, you were ready to bolt out of the office at any given moment. You had a feeling this conversation was going to happen sooner than later. Leonard McCoy was not clueless and you would be foolish to think so.
“Jim’s been asking about you.”
The sound of his name brought a sudden dryness to your throat. You haven’t seen the man since you walked out of his quarters in the middle of the night a few weeks ago. “Oh, what about?”
“You know he’s worried about you,” Leonard revealed and you couldn’t bring yourself to believe that statement. “What ever feelings you have for him, he needs to know.”
“I-I don’t understand,” you stammered out. “What feelings? Jim and I are just friends.”
Leonard pursed his lips. “Look, I know about what’s going on between the two of you. Jim might seem fine in the hallways but in actuality, he’s a mess. You have to talk to him.”
“There’s nothing going on between us,” you tried to convince him but it was a lost cause.
“Not anymore as far as I know. (Y/N), please know that I care about you and as much as I hate to admit, I care about Jim too. You two have been off lately and from what I’ve observed, it's affecting the way you work.”
“What do you mean? I've been doing great here. I’m looking after patients left and right, and despite how busy I am, I was able to finish up last week’s paper works early.”
You heard him sigh deeply through his nose. “That's not the point I wanted to make. All I am saying is that you and Jim need to talk this one out. I'm not taking anyone's side but I would very much like my two friends to make up and stop avoiding each other.”
You were speechless, the tears prickling your eyes as you thought of the next words to say.
“I-I have to go. I’ll see tomorrow,” you managed to say before quickly exiting Leonard’s office and walking out of the Medbay.
Your heart pounded hard against your chest and you willed yourself not to cry. All you wanted in the beginning was no-strings-attached sex and it was working out well with Jim. That was until you started developing feelings for the Captain and it seemed to be just one sided.
No one was supposed to know about the relationship. It had been a well-kept secret for nearly six months but it was slowly eating you up. Your feelings went beyond what you had originally anticipated when you began staying the night at Jim’s. You admired his strength and how passionate he was at his job. Despite his flaws, Jim was a good man. He’s smart, funny, sweet, handsome, understanding, charismatic– the list of words to describe him would be endless but to sum it all up, you were in love with him.
And then Jim died. You had never felt so empty when his body was brought into the Medbay and you had never felt so broken during the two long, agonizing weeks after McCoy injected him with Khan’s blood. No one knew for sure if he would wake up and each passing day tore you apart.
Losing him, even for the short time that felt like an eternity, made you realize how strong your feelings were and it scared you. You had never been in love like this before and the fact that Jim sacrificed himself without a second thought made you believe that something like that could happen again.
So you did the best thing you were good at, you ran away.
You ran away from the fact that you had fallen in love with Jim. You ran away from your chance to tell him the truth. You ran away to avoid facing your fears and you didn’t want to stop running. It was all too much for you.
You wanted to forget about him. You wanted to convince yourself that those kisses behind closed doors meant nothing and it was all an illusion. It was a secret affair that you two had and it ran its course. You didn’t really love him and you were just lonely.
What you felt for him was lust. Just pure, all-consuming lust and nothing more.
You repeated those words in your head when you stepped out of the turbolift and they kept replaying on your way back to your cabin. You could hear them clearly as you shut your eyes in bed and they even followed you into your dreams. Those words brought you a restless night because deep down, you knew that they weren’t true.
The Medbay was slow today. You were albeit glad that Leonard hasn’t cornered you into the exam room you were practically hiding in yet so that you two can continue the conversation you stormed out of.
As you sterilized that last of the hypodermic needles, you hear the sound of someone entering the room and then locking the door behind them. “Len, I swear to god if you bring it up one more time–”
You froze when your eyes met the unmistakable blue ones of James Kirk. Suddenly, the air had become thick as Jim slowly approached you with hands behind his back and a slight frown on his face.
“You’ve made yourself hard to find throughout the day, (Y/N),” he began once he got to you.
“I’ve been busy,” you said with such a small voice that you weren’t sure if he had heard you or not. “What are you doing here?”
“I need to talk to you.”
You glanced down to the floor, avoiding Jim’s strong gaze. “I think I made it clear that night that things were done.”
“No, you didn’t,” he responded sternly and it threw you off. “We slept together that night and by morning, you were gone. I deserve a bit of an explanation there because I thought everything was going well between us. Did I do something wrong?”
You held back a response. None of this was his fault. It was merely your actions and your feelings that fucked up the relationship you had with Jim and you were almost sure that things would never be the same.
“It just didn't work out, Jim. I can't do the sleeping around anymore,” you answered as you fumbled with the edge of your blue uniform. “Besides, we are both busy now and it's best if we focus on our jobs.”
Before you could dash out of the room, Jim reached forward and grasped your hand into his. The touch alone was enough to make you stop in the middle of your tracks and tilt your head up to meet Jim in the eye. “I don't believe that's the entire reason why.”
“Jim–” you tried pulling yourself away from him but to no avail. He wasn't letting you off that easy. “Please, I don't want to talk about this right now.”
“Do you even know what you've done to me?” He questioned you and the slight crack in his voice brought tears to your eyes. “The past year has been hell for me with Khan and almost losing everyone on this ship. You're the only one who kept me going and all of a sudden, you just ran away.”
“Don't,” you whispered as Jim inched closer to you. He let go of your hands to hold you by the sides of your face, making it impossible to leave his unwavering stare.
“Whatever it is, I want to fix it. I don’t know exactly how you feel about me, but I’m comfortable enough to say that I love you. I’ve been in love with you for a long time now and I want to have something more than just fooling around.”
He wiped the stray tear that escaped as you spoke. “Jim, I lost you. You were gone and it tore me apart. I love you too, but I can't go through all of that again. I know you would give your life to protect the crew but I don't want to lose you that way.”
“I know and I’m sorry. But you were on the ship and we were going to crash– I had to save you. I had to make sure you were going to make it out alive,” he admitted, and you saw nothing but all honesty in his eyes. “Please, let’s give this a try. We’ll take it as slow as you want. I just want to be able to hold you again.”
It was difficult for you to find your voice as Jim slowly leaned in. You fought the strong urge to close what little distance was left between the two of you. Breathing in his intoxicating scent, you could feel him holding you steady by your waist, the silence in the room becoming too deafening.
“Please,” he repeated, his lips brushing softly against yours and you gently pushed him away.
Jim stumbled as you backed away from him, your chest heaving as your tears blurred your vision. You were crying in front of him and in that moment, all you wanted to do was disappear.
“I’m scared, Jim,” you spluttered through your sobs. “I’ve never felt this way before and I don’t know what to do.”
“It’s okay,” he assured you as he neared you once again. “This is all new to me, too. We can figure this out.”
“What if we can’t? What if something bad happens again?”
“Then we fight through it together.”
Jim silently pleaded and you had to make a decision. You knew that in relationships, you had to take risks and there were certainly a lot more risks to take because of your job in Starfleet. However, you wanted to be brave– you wanted to be brave for Jim. You’ve spent so much of your life running away from your problems that you’ve never had the chance to stand up and fight for what you believed in.
And what you believed in right now was you and Jim.
“Let’s not focus on the ‘what ifs.’ Let’s not think about the bad stuff that may or may not happen and only look forward to the good. We can’t live our lives worrying about things all the time.”
Jim’s hand lifted your chin up, his gaze locked onto you as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “I love you, (Y/N). I know that this started off as a way to blow off some steam but trust me when I say that this has become so much more. I want to hold your hand out in the hallways. I want to be able to walk into the Medbay and see how your day is going. I want to kiss you without having the fear of someone catching us. I don’t want this to be a secret anymore. ”
“I want that, too.” you said truthfully. “I want it more than anything.”
Jim’s lips were dangerously close to yours and you let them be. “Good, because I need this.”
He pressed his lips against yours and you almost immediately kissed him back. Cradling your face with his hands, you wound your arms around his neck as he held you close. He nipped on your bottom lip while you ran the palm of your hand up and down his chest.
Before things got heated, a knock on the door sounded and the two of you pulled away flushed and panting. Once you straightened out your uniforms that were loosen up by wandering hands, you called out for whoever it was to come in.
“Bones,” Jim greeted as the CMO entered the exam room. “How are ya, buddy?”
“I’m just dandy,” Leonard replied. “You two made up?”
You looked over to Jim who simply smiled at you. “Yeah, we’re good now.”
“Great,” your boss said in relief. “I’m happy for you both but I would suggest doing whatever it was you were trying to do some place else. This is my Medbay and I do not condone this type of inappropriate behavior over here.”
“No worries, Bones. We’ll get out of your hair,” Jim chuckled, grasping your hand into his before leading you out of the room.
“Wait, my shift is not over yet,” you pointed out and Jim halted in his walking. “Len’s gonna chew me out if I leave now.”
“So, you would rather spend time with Bones than me?”
Playfully rolling your eyes, you take his hand and pulled him towards the turbolift. “You win this time, Kirk.”
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Writing On The Wrist 2
You woke up in Medbay, feeling heavy and achy, but not so feverish anymore.
“What time is it?” You muttered to yourself. “Gonna miss my shift.”
Immediately, letters appeared on your wrist again.
“It’s 1400 hours and you aren’t going anywhere until I clear you.”
Before you could think of a smart reply, the CMO, your very own recently met soulmate, appeared by your bed. Now that you could see more clearly, he looked even more stunning: tall, broad-shouldered and and very tan for being on a starship.
“How ya feeling?” He asked, checking the readout on the biobed.
“Not so awful. Thirsty,” you managed.
“You want to try some water? Think it’ll stay down?”
“I’ll give it a shot,” you shrugged and sipped cautiously when he handed you a cup.
“Thanks, Doctor. I was really in a bind.”
“Yeah, you were. This strain hits hard and fast and if you’d waited any longer, the fever would have become extremely dangerous.”
“Yikes,” you shuddered. “Thank goodness I was in good hands–legendary, in fact.”
The doctor’s face was exasperated, then amused, then slightly smug.
“I should have kept my mouth shut that day. Between Carol and Jim and Nyota spreadin’ it around, I’ll never hear the end of it.”
“I would imagine that there’s some truth to it, though, being a surgeon and all.”
You were definitely on the verge of flirting, but heck, it was your soulmate, after all.
“That’s for me to know, and you to find out,” he murmured, winking at you.
Up close, his face was even more interesting and expressive than you’d noticed before. There were lines in his face that told of a somewhat turbulent life, but also dimples that hinted at a fabulous smile.
You decided that you could have done a whole lot worse when it came to soulmates despite his initial rejection.
“Now that you’ve met me, do you still feel averse to the idea of soulmates?” You ventured. “Because I’ve actually really enjoyed “talking” via wrist writing and you’re really not the terrible person you claim to be.“
He sighed and looked at you with a weary and somewhat torn expression.
“Honestly, no, but we’re on different shifts, so if we want to hang out, we’ll have to get clever.”
“Not a problem,” you said, relief filling you. (You weren’t sure whether it was him or that you didn’t have to puke finally.)
Leonard thought about you a lot over the next few days and was definitely becoming open to the soulmate thing. He could admit to himself he thought there might be something to the whole destiny thing, given how much he’d come to enjoy your wit on his arm and he did find you very attractive in person, even though you were sick. So he set about to rectify his earlier hasty judgment and get to know his soulmate.
It was harder than he thought, given the mismatched schedules and and the hole he’d dig for himself with his stubbornness, but at last the two of you figured out times to get together.
He’d even tried to clean up his language a bit so fewer swear words would end up on your body. If Chapel looked at him knowingly when he used a substitute instead of his usual curses, well, who cared?
Jim came down to see him one day and informed him he was going to be with the landing party for the next away mission.
“There’s some kind of illness spreading down there and I want you there to see if you can help. It’s a swampy planet, so wear protective gear.”
Leonard sighed. “When do we leave, Jim?”
“In three hours. Meet me on the transporter pad at 1400 hours.”
That evening, you were enjoying your off weekend, having earlier traded with another officer. You had finally put the flu behind you and had settled down to watch holovids of crime shows. Halfway through the second episode of “Starfleet Criminal Investigative Services” you began to see some bizarre bits of dialogue coming across your wrist.
“I told you I don’t know anything…..”
“I’m a doctor, not a guerilla…..”
“Don’t hurt her….she didn’t do anything wrong….”
“We’re trying to help your people…..AAHH!!”
“Dammit….”
You bolted out of bed and tried his comm. No answer. Fear for him rose the more these ominous fragments appeared and disappeared. Leonard was in trouble, possibly being tortured. You had to find out what was going on.
Seeing the captain on the bridge, looking like thunder and barking orders right and left, you knew something was definitely wrong.
“Excuse me, can I talk to the Captain?” You asked the yeoman, who was hustling about. “It’s about the away mission.”
“Is it important? Because we’ve lost contact with the away team.”
“I guessed that,” you said. “I may have some information for him.”
He looked at you weirdly, but brought you to the captain.
“Sorry to other you, Sir,” you began, “but I’ve heard from Doctor McCoy. Something awful is happening down there.”
The captain’s eyebrows were bushy peaks of skepticism, but he breathed deeply and restrained himself from yelling at you. The stress was really getting to him.
“How in the world did you get in touch with him?”
For answer, you pulled up your sleeve, exposing the writing on your wrist, which was coming through in random spurts of curses and pleas.
“Captain, the doctor and I are linked by a soulmate bond. I can see every word he says. I’m very worried about him right now.”
Kirk leaned forward and read some of the writing for himself. He frowned and clenched his fists.
“That’s not good. How long has it been like this?”
“Maybe twenty minutes? At first I couldn’t make sense of it, but then it became obvious they’d been captured.”
He nodded at you. “Bones, you’ve been keeping secrets from me,” he muttered under his breath. To you he asked “Can you ask him where he is? We’re having no luck scanning for them. Spock’s being trying to connect with Uhura through their bond, but she seems to be unconscious or shielding heavily.”
This doubled your fear. Nyota had been captured, too. You swallowed through a lump of dread and nodded.
“I’ll try.”
Of course, if Leonard was unconscious or had his arms tied behind his back, he wouldn’t see it, but you went ahead and spoke.
“Leonard, what’s wrong? What happened?”
Nothing.
“Leonard, are you alive? Can you talk to me?”
Finally a reply came.
“We’ve been captured. They’re more afraid of us than the plague that’s killing them. I’m in a cell in a cave system. Don’t know where the others are. They’re trying to pump Uhura and I for information.”
“Did they hurt you?”
“Nothing I can’t handle. I keep hearing screams from the other rooms and it’s driving me wild, not being able to get to them.”
You and Jim exchanged a worried glance.
“Tell him to hang in there. We’re sending a team down as soon as possible. There’s only one cave system big enough to be a prison down there.”
You related this and could almost imagine Leonard’s nervous twitch at hearing Jim’s bold plan.
“Just be careful. This place is crawling with guards. Tell Jim not to do anything stupid.”
You held up your arm to the captain again. He snorted and gave an exasperated sigh.
“Why does he always think I’m going to do something stupid? If saving his hide takes some stupidity, well, I’ll do what it takes and deal with his wrath later. You in?”
You nodded.
“Okay then. But first, how’s your combat skills?”
“Decent, but I’m good at communications.”
“So I’ve heard. Uhura’s said you’re one of the best we’ve got and she wants you moved to Alpha shift.”
Your cheeks warmed at such high praise from the best linguist in the Fleet, but the anxiousness about her and Leonard soon returned in full force.
“How soon do we leave, Sir?” You asked.
“As soon as I get a team together and prepped. That information you got about the cave completely changed the game. Thank you, Lieutenant.”
“It was the bond. Thank goodness for that.”
“Yes,” Jim smiled. “And I can’t wait to get him back here for you. Maybe having a soulmate will make him less grumpy.”
“It didn’t at first,” you retorted, “but I think he’s starting to actually like me.”
“If he didn’t, I’d be very disappointed in him.”
After a thorough briefing, the away team was beamed down to an area not far from the cave system entrance. The planet was very rocky, with little plant life and strange hulking vulture-like birds swooping and soaring everywhere. Jim had brought Spock and six security officers who immediately began scanning the horizon for signs of life.
“Nothing within 200 meters, Captain,” reported a redshirt.
“Strange,” Jim muttered. “This place was crawling with them before we came down.”
“Maybe they’re all inside now,” you theorized. Torturing Leonard, probably.
The fight to get in wasn’t as hard as you’d expect. The aliens weren’t used to enemies who fought back and scattered with loud shrieks. As you went deeper into the caves, your wrist began to get warm, meaning you were getting closer to Leonard. You stuck close behind Jim, phaser at the ready. The caves were dark and winding and very confusing. You’d stopped at a fork in the road, unsure which direction to take, when Spock spoke up.
“It is the right fork. Nyota has been advising me.”
“She’s still alive?” You blurted out.
“Yes, but time is of the essence. She fears they may kill the doctor.”
“Let’s get a move on then,” Jim said, stern face not giving away anything he was really feeling.
After several more turns and scuffles with guards, you found Nyota and nurse Chapel in a cell. Christine appeared to be mostly unharmed, but the lieutenant was definitely worse for wear. One of her arms was tied up in a makeshift sling and there were bruises and cuts all over her face.
“Hey guys,” she said, mustering a smile. “Glad to see you, even you, Captain.”
Spock wasted little time in breaking the lock and freeing her, frowning as he looked her over.
“Do you require assistance, Nyota?” He asked.
“I can walk, Spock,” she assured him. “It’s mostly my arm and side. You should see the other guys.” She gave a smug grin that boded ill for the alien captors, but it slipped off quickly when she saw you standing there.
“Y/N! I’m so sorry. They took the doctor away for another “questioning” a few minutes ago. Have you heard from him?“
Your wrist was still warm, but no words had appeared for ten minutes and you guessed Leonard was unconscious.
"Up until ten minutes ago. We need to find him soon.”
“Right,” Jim said grimly. “Point the way, Lieutenants.”
You were afraid to ask Chapel what they’d already done to him, the look on her face was so concerned.
Leonard was trying to catch his breath after another round with the whips, when he felt his wrist grow warm and saw words that gave him hope.
“Hold on, Leonard. I’m coming.”
He didn’t dare say anything, since the guards were still hovering over him, but he felt better and tried to focus on his mental pictures of you to pass the time.
Presently, there was a zapping noise and both guards hit the floor.
“Bones!” Jim called. “Are you with us?”
“Yeah,” he croaked, lifting his head for the first time in hours. His whole body throbbed and he knew he’d lost a lot of blood from the torture.
A sharp gasp came from outside and he fixed his eyes on yours, which were filled with tears at the sight of his battered, chained up body.
“Len!” You gasped. “What did they do to you?”
Jim blasted the lock apart and you rushed to help him and Spock free your soulmate.
“Not sure you want to know, Darlin’.” He whispered, wincing as the chains were pulled away. You saw his back was a mess and there was blood leaking from his mouth. His blue shirt hung in shreds.
“Did they kick you in the mouth or is that from internal bleeding?” You asked.
“The latter.”
“Hang on for me, babe,” you said, “we’re getting you out of here.”
Spock immediately handed the medkit you’d brought to Chapel, who did what she could to make the trip home less painful for the doctor.
Despite that, he had completely lost consciousness by the time the team made it back to the Enterprise.
You sat with Jim outside Medbay while Leonard was undergoing surgery, both of you pacing back and forth anxiously as the hours passed.
“I’m glad he has you, Y/N,” Jim said at last.
“He would’ve died if you didn’t have that bond with him and figured out what was going on. Thank you. I really don’t know what I’d do without him.”
“Neither do I, Captain. Neither do I,” you sighed, trying to hide the quiver in your voice. “What would we do without his big heart, grumpy overprotectiveness and bad metaphors?”
“I heard that…” came across your wrist suddenly.
“Are you awake?”
“Sort of. Feel like I’ve been fighting a Gorn. I want to see you, Darlin.”
“I’ll be down as soon as Dr. M'Benga says it’s okay. I love you, Len.” You whispered the last sentence, hoping Jim wouldn’t hear. He did, but he didn’t say a word.
Len’s reply came swiftly.
“I love you, too, sweetheart.”
Smiling happily and blushing at the last word, you nodded to Jim and left to find your soulmate. You were going to make sure Len’s recuperation was as pleasant as possible.
@thewaithfuckingannoyme
@kirkaholic123
@medicatemedrmccoy
@southernbellestatues
@star-trekkin-across-theuniverse
@frostingsfics
@yourtropegirl
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Hey if you have time: ReaderXChekov where reader gets injured on an away mission and has to go see McCoy but plot twist reader is afraid of doctors and tries to hide. Chekov finds reader and drags/coaxes them to med-bay and stays while they get treated and is in general a good partner and friend. Bonus points if McCoy is grumpy that they are being so affectionate while he is trying to work, but secretly is glad Chekov is there because he knows reader is scared of doctors.
Chekov X Reader – An Apple a Day
A/N – Writing for Chekov but thinking of Jaal in Mass Effect Andromeda.
Warnings – None.
Rating – T
There was no doubt about it. Being a red shirt officially sucked. Sure, you’d often heard jokes about it but you’d never actually believed it. Now, you were stuck behind a rock on a desert outcrop, shielding yourself from Klingon fire while Kirk and Spock did the same a few metres away. Ideally, you could have laid covering fire down all day until Scotty beamed you back aboard the Enterprise. The planet however, ruined that plan with its highly magnetic field, meaning that because of interference with the sensors, Scotty could only beam the three of you back if you were all grouped together; that meant you had to leave the safety of cover so as not to risk Kirk or Spock’s life. It’s not that you didn’t trust Kirk and Spock to have your back but being the only security member there left you wishing you were the one protecting your team, the way it was meant to be; after all, you were the best shot of the landing party.
“I couldn’t have been more scientifically minded. Nooo, I had to decide punching things was more fun.” You grumbled silently, mentally preparing yourself for what was to come next.
At Kirk’s nod, you sprinted the daunting gap which had seemed pitifully small only a few minutes ago. Seconds before you made it to safety, you felt a stinging sensation under your ribs. You knew all too well the pain of a phaser shot and this most certainly wasn’t it. A risky glance at your attackers revealed that the Klingons were accompanied by some form of unknown animal. It was a creature the likes of which you’d never seen before, an iguana-like animal, about the size of a large German Shepard, that apparently spat some form of acid. You felt tugging on your arm and in the next instance, the three of you were back in the transporter room.
Kirk gave you a concerned once-over, his gaze lingering on your torn shirt, the bile had lightly burnt the skin underneath. You glanced down at the injury; fortunately, it wasn’t causing much pain past a light stinging.
“Spock, comments?” Kirk demanded, never looking away from you.
“The Klingons have been suspected of creating genetic hybrids for some time now, Captain. Lieutenant (L/N)’s injury appears to be the work of the first one we’ve seen; effects are unknown. It is advisable that the lieutenant is escorted to med-bay for immediate treatment and long-term observation.”
Kirk nodded at the practical analysis, meanwhile, deep-routed fear clawed at the back of your mind, making you nervous about what could come if you didn’t act fast. Hiding your reservations, you tittered a small laugh, Spock raised a curious eyebrow.
“Come on guys, a doctor for this paper cut? I’ve had worse injuries from falling over, I feel fine, really.” You grinned breezily.
“No, Lieutenant.” Kirk argued. “I want you checked over by Bones.”
You held up your hands in mock surrender. “Alright, you got it. I’ll go to med-bay right now if it puts your mind at ease. Still, I really do feel fine so it’d be a waste of your time for you to escort me when I already know the way.”
“You sure?”
“Stop fussing, will you? I’ll see you later.”
Before any more arguments could be made you ran out of the room, taking a left for the turbolift but changing direction as soon as you knew it was safe to. If you were going anywhere, it was straight to your hab-suite for a change of clothing. Once in the safety of your room, you glanced at the wound which had dried out rather quickly, you hid it with the new shirt and left quickly, heading to the one place you would fade into the background; Engineering.
“Vhat do you mean ‘not here’? Vhere else could (s)he be?” Chekov asked McCoy dubiously. He’d come to pick you up from med-bay as a surprise only to find a disgruntled McCoy arguing with Spock over the comm-link.
“I mean that (Y/N) is not in this room, nor has (s)he been here since the mandatory physical at the beginning of the year.” McCoy growled gruffly.
“But (s)he’s hurt, zhe Captain said so.”
“I’m sure (s)he is but I don’t have time to play a damned game of hide and seek on a ship this big. You want my advice? Get a tracking device. Better yet, check with Scotty, (s)he’s probably with him in engineering anyway.”
“Really?” Chekov looked hopeful.
“HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW?” McCoy burst out irritably. “You’re not gonna find anything here, go ask somebody else and stop wasting my time, I do actually have other patients, damn it.”
Chekov knew better than to provoke McCoy further, he left the doctor alone and begun his search for you, trying to reach you through your communicator every so often but receiving no reply.
You didn’t remember entering the empty storage room, in fact, you didn’t remember much at all. All you could focus on now was the debilitating effect the iguana-dog had had on you; evidently, the bile it produced was a fast acting venom with a delayed start, not an acid. Knowing what had damaged you however didn’t help, what you needed now was a cure. You were currently experiencing a wide-array of symptoms, each worse than the last. It had started with mild nausea and sweating. Then came the dimming vision. After that, your breathing had become shallow and laboured. Even if you wanted to see a doctor now, which you didn’t, it wouldn’t be possible; small movements alone caused serious pain to flare through your body, as if your skin was on fire.
The next stab of pain caused you to wonder exactly how much time had passed, it had lost its effect at some point around the dimming vision. Had it been seconds or hours? Was it even the same day or had you slipped into a different one? How long did it take for the various new symptoms to occur?
At some point during your suffering, mild delirium set in. You were stuck reliving the previous battle, except, with each rendition, there was something else out of place. In one battle, you were walking on the ocean’s waves, in another you were fighting the people you’d lost through the years. Finally, you could hear echoes of things you’d heard before while you fired your phaser at imaginary foes. One echo however, was new, something you’d never heard said before. The familiar voice resonated within your thoughts, bringing you briefly back into reality.
“Pavel.” You mumbled upon feeling his arms wrap around you, raising you into the air; it felt vaguely like flying.
“Argh, you stupid, stupid… Hang on, McCoy vill fix zhis.” Chekov stressed frantically. He couldn’t believe his eyes, your skin was almost translucent, revealing the veins and arteries underneath.
“No.” You batted his chest lightly, barely a tap. “I’m fine… don’ need him.”
Chekov wasn’t listening, he was too busy trying to keep you steady as he ran the way to med-bay.
“Don wanna hurt ‘gain.” You argued bleakly through laboured breaths.
“He’ll make you better lyublyu (love).”
“…Docs ’re dangerous.”
“Not zhis one. I promise.”
Fresh waves of pain coursed through you, you writhed against Chekov who tightened his grip on you.
The only indication that you’d reached med-bay was McCoy’s exclamation of, “Good God man.”
“Doctor.” Chekov pleaded helplessly, so sure that he was going to lose the one person he truly loved aboard the Enterprise.
“On the bed.” McCoy ordered.
“Don’t leave.” You whimpered, using your little energy to grasp Chekov’s shirt.
“I’m here lyublyu (love), don’t vorry.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you’ll make my work much easier.” McCoy grumbled sarcastically, hiding his concern for you behind a disdainful tone.
Shouted words turned to fuzzy mumblings and then to nothing as your body finally gave in, though whether to exhaustion or medication, you weren’t sure. McCoy did his best to stabilise you, all the while issuing orders to Kirk and Spock through his communicator; if he was going to save your life, you’d need a different kind of help.
After hours of work, pumping you with endless hypos and chemicals, your survival became a waiting game, relying purely on the success of Kirk and Spock. Chekov stopped murmuring comforting words to you for the first time since he’d brought you in. Fresh tears fell freely from his eyes as he gripped your hand and steeled himself for the question he’d been dreading since the start.
“Vill-” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Vill (s)he make it?”
McCoy sighed, lifting an uncomfortable hand to his face. “I don’t know.”
Although he’d been prepared for the answer, Chekov shuddered queasily. What he really wanted to hear was something along the lines of, “Yeah it looks bad now but it’ll be okay.” or, “(S)he’ll be fine after a good night’s sleep.”
It was foolish to wish for a lie but that was all he wanted to believe. Hearing the truth was acknowledging the likelihood of your death and that was something he simply couldn’t bear. After hearing that, Chekov couldn’t bring himself to ask anything else so he settled for whispering all his plans for the two of you in the future, slipping naturally into Russian as a small comfort to himself.
You struggled to open your eyes, squinting against bright light that forced you to keep them shut for a minute. You didn’t think you had ever felt worse, every muscle ached like it did after intense training, your mouth held the after-taste of vomit, and you could feel extra pain where you knew several hypos had been used; on top of all that, there was a heavy weight on your thighs and you wondered briefly if you’d been paralysed. You fought against the light again, forcing your eyes open until they adjusted. If you’d had the energy to smile, you would have, Chekov was sat on a chair next to your bed, his head was resting on your legs and his usually neat hair was ruffled all over the place.
“Glad to see you’ve joined the land of the living.” Nurse Chapel beamed at you, bringing a large glass of water with a straw in it.
“H-”
Nurse Chapel help up a hand. “No talking. I expect you to drink that first and then you’re going to let me run some tests; when I’m done, you can talk, understand?”
You bobbed you head lightly, instantly regretting the headache it brought with it.
“Good. Glad we’ve come to an agreement.” She passed you the water, making sure you were taking steady sips before scanning your body and talking again. “You know, you’re lucky you got me instead of Doctor McCoy. He’s worked on you for almost 60 hours straight and let me tell you, he’s furious; still, underneath all that crabbiness lies a heart of gold, if he yells, it’s because he cares. Now tell me, do you remember what happened?”
Disjointed memories of your delirium came to you, the only true one being of the iguana-dog. You put down the now empty glass and cleared your throat, ready to test your voice. “Venom?” You croaked.
“Yes, venom that you foolishly tried to hide. Venom that we didn’t have a cure to.”
“How-”
“Spock and Kirk had to ‘liberate’ one of the creatures that did it from the Klingon camp so we could synthesize a cure; I imagine they’ll want words with you too.”
You cringed, the thought of a telling off wasn’t appealing, surely the venom had been enough of a punishment already.
“Don’t worry.” Chapel smiled. “They won’t get to my patient until you’re fully recovered.”
You silently prayed that wouldn’t be for a long time so you could put off the punishment. “What about the iguana-dog?”
“Iguana-dog? Oh, the Triffid that poisoned you?”
You raised an eyebrow at the name.
“Yes, that’s’ in the animal lab being examined, though it made quite the effort to get to you. Spock believes that the scent the other Triffid made the creature friendly towards you; it’s tried to attack everyone else on the ship you know.”
“I always did want a pet that could kill me.” You joked, lying back uncomfortably.
“Well you’ll have to talk to Kirk about that, for now rest, it’s been a long-”
Chekov stirred, mumbling a tired, “Lyublyu (love).”
Chapel sighed sympathetically, “I’ll give you two five minutes together, any more than that and I’m fetching McCoy.”
Chekov stared blearily after her before coming to his senses and turning his attention to you. “(Y/N)!” he grabbed hold of you enthusiastically, quickly letting go when you cried out in pain.
“Shit, do you need a doctor, vater, sleep, tell me and I’ll get help.” He hovered uneasily, clearly ready to run wherever you needed.
“It’s okay, jus’ need a little rest and I’ll be right as rain.”
Chekov stared wide-eyed, unsure of what to say next. He was past anger and elation; right now, he just wanted to care for you and make your recovery his number one priority.
“Thanks for staying with me.”
“Lyublyu (love), I’m never leaving.”
“Good luck with that, five minutes and Chapel gets McCoy to throw you out.”
“I’d like to see him try.”
You managed a weak laugh at Chekov’s bravado, he was swelling his chest out to look bigger. “Easy there Rambo, McCoy would wipe the floor with a toothpick like you. What’s say we leave the fighting to a pro like me?”
“Leave zhe fighting to you?” Chekov tutted. “Zhat’s vhat got us into zhis mess.”
“Alright, alright, then you think you can stay on guard duty while I sleep? Who knows what kind of experiments McCoy’s ready to try when I nod off.”
“He vould never.”
“Wanna bet? I hear he’s pretty pissed at me.”
“(Y/N) please, zhe whole ship is pretty pissed at you.”
“Oh yeah? What about you?”
“I’m zhe vorst of all, unfortunately I’m stupid enough to love you.”
You grinned and continued the conversation, quickly losing track of time. Nurse Chapel watched through the window in the adjacent room while McCoy complained at her about anything and everything he could think of concerning you. “-and on top of that Chekov’s still in there and I know he won’t (Y/N) leave to do his damned job; that’s distraction in the workplace.”
“Oh hush.” Chapel chided. “We both know you’re glad (s)he’s not alone.”
McCoy blustered. “No. I’d be glad if the idiot didn’t fear doctors, I’ve never heard of anything so ridiculous in all my years.” He kept complaining while rifling through drawers, making himself look busy as Chapel listened; she shook her head and continued to observe you, letting McCoy get all his ranting out before he could get to you, though she feared you would still get an earful anyway.
#star trek imagine#imagine chekov#chekov imagine#star trek#reader#reader insert#fanfiction#chekov#chekov x reader#pavel chekov#pavel chekov x reader#an apple a day#Anonymous
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Gotham 3.21 - Destiny Calling
As I watched it, and some random observations here and there.
Previously on Gotham.
In short – the theme for s3 barring these episodes. Betrayal! More betrayal! Betrayal for lunch, breakfast and dinner! People are dead, alive, dead, then alive again.
As always, long post will be long - monstrously long- and in two parts. There are likely to be rambling digressions. Gobblepot may appear (although I welcome all shippers and non-shippers alike :)). There will be naked favouritism and naked not-favouritism. Broader comments at the end on plotlines and parallels and general direction.
Screaming and mayhem outside while the bank still tries to run as normal. An old woman repeatedly asks for her savings while an uninterested seller tells her there’a problem with the account. The old woman reveals herself to be infected, and starts wrecking the place. We’ve all wanted to do that in the bank, really. And the post office. Especially the post office.
An armed officer runs out of GCPD while a virus'd prisoner beats a cop and general mayhem reigns. We go to the locker room and see – hilariously - that someone has written ‘Gordon has the rage’ across the lockers. What the actual fuck? Who took the time to do that?
The virus voices are telling Jim he’s a killer as he stares in the mirror, hissing it over and over.
(A big disgruntled aside: So – Jim’s big dark truth is that he’s a killer at heart? Really? Weirdly – I watched an episode of Star Trek at the weekend, in which Kirk had the following wisdom to offer (because Kirk can solve all problems :)).
All right. It's instinctive. But the instinct can be fought. We're human beings with the blood of a million savage years on our hands, but we can stop it. We can admit that we're killers, but we're not going to kill today. That's all it takes. Knowing that we won't kill today.
And it’s never more true than here. Barnes told Jim that. There’s no big fundamental difference between Butch and Harvey, Oswald and Jim, Barnes and Falcone, Bruce and Jerome, Bruce 1 and Bruce 2. It comes down to what they choose to do. Their ability and inclination to make good choices is – of course – dictated by their circumstances: but they still ultimately have a choice. There’s not some innate quality that makes a killer – nothing ‘special’ about the ability to kill.
Further – we’ve had ample proof that Jim has no particular love of killing. He refuses to kill Oswald way back in the pilot, and again in the middle of the Galavan mess – even when Oswald has a gun pointed at him, and killing him would have made Jim’s life easier. He could have shot Barbara in the church tower, or let her fall, but tried to save her instead. He didn’t want to kill Ogden Barker. He expressed regret over killing Galavan. We might see him lose his temper a lot, and get physically violent – but that doesn’t equate to some burning need to kill.
So – this just doesn’t really ring true.
And as a final observation, this is basically a betrayal of the man we started out with. We come in with Jim, who is appalled at the state of Gotham because of his innate decency. He’s ‘the last good man in Gotham’. He has to compromise his principles over time because there is no other way to get things done, but it is with the end goal of doing the right thing. If anything, the tension was how much Jim was willing to compromise his ideals to do the right thing, how much that hardened him, damaged him.
So, when, how, and why did this morph into: ‘Jim Gordon has a big bad darkness at the centre of his soul, and his dearest wish is to kill?’)
Jim is visibly fighting the virus. Harvey enters the room and asks for Jim’s gun - not badge. The officers know he’s infected, and Harvey is doing his best to keep this situation stable. Jim says he can control the virus, but Harvey says it’s for his own protection.
We hear that Lee apparently disappeared in the chaos and is waiting for Jim to give in. Harvey tells Jim to prove her wrong. Jim asks where Bruce is.
Bruce is in the interview room, where Alfred watches from behind glass. Jim and Harvey enter. There’s a brief conversation where they establish it’s not the clone, and Alfred says he must talk with Bruce – whose strength, he believes, will bring him back to his right mind. Lucius then enters, calling Harvey.
(An aside – and where was clone Bruce this episode? It was sorted of implied that he could play a role here, and it never came about)
Harvey is delighted, Lucius has found that there’s an antidote
I could kiss your face
Lucius actually did detective work and found notes about the antidote in papers from court leaders house. Hugo was designing own special antidote. Jim asks where Strange is, only to be exasperated when Harvey explains. Jim says Strange is a weasel who’ll be trying to get out of town (you’d never do that, Jim, would you?), and that they should check the downtown train station.
Lucius tells Harvey to wait in a warning tone. Harvey tries to say he knows the risks, but Lucius points out that Strange's version is accelerated and Jim won't be able to fight long.
I like Lucius. He’s smart, and measured, and compassionate, and actually puts in the work. It’ll be interesting to see how the balance at GCPD works next season because, in many ways, he’s supplanted most of what Jim should be.
The railway station where people are fleeing town. Hugo still looks so stylish. He’s stopped by too burly men and utters a truly beautiful,
Oh no
Fish appears
I think you mean: hello Fish - I miss you.
She smiles,
Don’t worry sweetheart, the fun has just begun
Hugo looks resigned as he’s taken away.
A penthouse overlooking the city. Ed has been reading Villainy for Dummies, and is loftily talking about Rome – I think it’s Nero fiddling while Rome burned, but I tuned out. He praises the Court’s style
Barbara is more interested in the opportunity to consolidate power. Ed has no interest in running Gotham. He only wants to kill Oswald because, as we saw when he was desperately trying to make contact with the Court, Ed can’t leave a job undone. Babs is impatient. Ed will need muscle for that, and why should she help Ed, if Ed won’t help her. She wants Ed to use that ‘big, beautiful brain’ of his to help her, and she’ll help him.
(An aside – uh, have Barbara and Ed been intimate? I know that Barbara can sometimes sexualise her mannerisms – but there was a familiarity there (baby, honey, all the touching) that was…. different, and they’re very in-sync. She’s not really using her sexuality in an attempt to seduce him to her cause either. I’m not suggesting a romance – but it wouldn’t surprise me if that was how they’d killed some time in that penthouse, or at some other point.)
Back with Fish and Hugo
I thought we were friends
Hugo stammers that he can't refuse the Court. Fish tells him she isn't upset. She knew that when Hugo was summoned it was to cook up horror. She needs horror. She knows the Court made the virus, and she knows there’s more.
Hugo pleads, but Fish is implacable.
You will give me the virus. You will give me the army you promised me. You will give me everything I say until the city is in the palm of my hand. Clear?
Hugo manages to be bitter, resigned and obsequious in two words
Yes, madame.
Jim and Harvey arrive at the station too late. Harvey's phone rings. It’s for Jim – Lee checking in.
Jim answers. He tells her to turn herself in. Lee comments he's fighting – but the cage is finally open – he’s free. She thought he loved her – they can be together now. Jim doesn’t want it like this. She pours herself some of Jim’s whiskey and asks what the whispers say. Was it about hurting? Killing?
See how well I know you
She says she’ll check in later, but she’s off to have fun.
Jim looks like he’s succumbing to virus when Harvey calls his name. He gives Jim a gun. They’re off to find Hugo
Jim and Harvey meet Fish’s crew in some tunnel somewhere – presumably leading out of the station
Fish tells Harvey he looks awful. Harvey thanks her, and then says
I know in your own sick way you love this city. Gotham is bleeding to death
Hugo laughs suddenly – he’s noticed that Jim has the virus
Fish approaches him, and asks what it feels like. Jim says like it’s taking all his willpower not to kill her. Fish and Hugo confirm that they have a cure for the virus, while Jim fumes. Harvey says he’ll shoot her if she doesn’t step back
Jim growls that she’s had her chance. Fish is no fool, though – she has backup. Victor charges up. Jim leaps up and breaks a water pipe. Victor’s gun freezes the water, creating an ice wall – behind which Jim snarls. Fish looks at him.
There he is - the real James Gordon. Nice to meet you, at last.
She laughs and walks away. Jim snarls like an angry chihuahua.
Burning city shot again. We’re at GCPD.
Alfred has brought Bruce tea, and asks if he’s hungry. Alfred isn’t being trite here – we will try to make tea and sandwiches in times of crisis. He talks about going home, or going to Switzerland, where they had happy holidays
Bruce is blank, and tells him his attempts to elicit emotion are clumsy, and that he murdered his best friend and teacher. Alfred says he was a liar, manipulator, and brainwasher. Bruce denies this – saying that he gave him revenge, and took away his pain – which is more than Alfred ever did.
Alfred looks like he’s in pain
Bruce says they’ve merely paved the way for one who is to come. Alfred asks what he means, and Bruce ominously replies:
You'll see
Oswald’s mansion, where Bridget and Victor squabbling over who gets to kill Hugo, while Hugo trying to ooze way out of it. They power up, and he panics, calling for
Miss Mooney
Miss Mooney is busy - I'm here now
It’s Oswald, who has been sitting nearby, drinking.
I think your children are angry with you. You made them what they are, then abandoned them.
He tells Hugo he’s working with Fish. They’re partners, now – she forgave him. She has evolved. She has a vision. She sees a city where people like Oswald, Victor and Bridget are in charge.
He also tells Hugo that the virus is tearing that city apart, and they need an antidote.
Hugo says if he tells, he has nothing to trade for his safety – they can torture him all they want. Oswald blithely says OK. Hugo looks worried. Oswald comments that in Arkham, he was tortured daily. Hugo blusters
That was therapy.
Oswald looks outraged for a split second, then smiles
The sensation was like my head being torn open, and hot lava poured into my brain. Thinking of it afterwards made me physically ill.
(An aside – oh Oswald.)
He laughs
So – naturally - I had to have it
Oswald has the machine. Hugo caves instantly - which is testament to how bad the pain elicited by the machine actually is. He’ll tell them everything.
Oswald smiles.
I know - but not just yet
He flips the switch. Hugo screams.
Back in the tunnel – Jim punches his way through the ice. Apparently, the virus makes your bones very hard too. When they get to the street, a still virusy Jim tears Harvey’s car door off. Harvey tells him to fight the virus, not his car, and says he’ll drive.
GCPD – where a random cop tells Alvarez that Mayor James has called in the national guard. Oh no - Alvarez is infected. He breaks the man’s neck, and starts trashing the place.
The interrogation room, where Alfred asks Bruce again who's coming. Bruce wants him to leave. Alfred refuses, and asks him again,
Remember who you are
I know who I am. I have a destiny
Alfred tells Bruce what the sensei offered was not real – he needs to remember what's real. Bruce snarls that vengeance for his parents’ murder was real.
Alfred says that’s not real. What's real was how Bruce's mum read to him when he got sick, or how Alfred and Bruce’s dad looked for him when he got lost sailing in storm, out of their minds with worry. They might have died in that alley, and that man may have taken away the pain of that one night: but there is no life or love without pain. That man could not touch the love Bruce’s parents gave him, that he still has inside him – the same love Alfred has for him:
I love you. I would do anything for you, I would die for you
He tells Bruce he needs to find that love
Come back to me, master Bruce.
Bruce has tears in his eyes
(An aside – I have tears in my eyes. Godammit show.)
There’s fracas outside. Alfred reluctantly leaves. Bruce is still shaken - but sees Alfred has left his pen.
Alvarez is picking off cops at random. Alfred tackles him, and nearly winds up shot himself – but Lucius comes to the rescue. Alfred thanks him. Lucius is admirably unshaken. However, when they head back to the interview room, Bruce is gone having used Alfred’s pen to pick the lock on his cuffs.
At Sirens, Butch tries to convince Tabitha that Barbara has to go, and that sharing info with Fish would take out Ed and Barbara at once. Tabitha isn’t convinced though. She’s also distracted by Lee, who is ordering a drink. Lee drinks a lot in this episode, are we sure booze wasn’t Lee's deepest desire?
Butch says he’s surprised to see Lee. She calls him an errand boy, then a shoe-shine boy, then says she wants to see Barbara. Butch has enough of the insults, and moves to throw her out, but then sees she has the virus, and is tossed across the room
Tabitha checks on an unconscious Butch. Lee taunts her – asking her repeatedly to take a message to her boss, and calling her a sidekick – first Theo’s, now Barbara’s. The next time Lee sees Barbara, she’s going to rip her head off. Tabitha looks worried at this. Lee leaves, and Butch begins to come round.
Bruce is on the chaotic streets, heading for the demon’s head, or whatever. Lucius and Alfred follow some way behind – Alfred promising to kill whoever did this to him.
Fish and co in the slaughterhouse where the antidote is kept. Oswald tells Hugo if this is a trap, Hugo is dead. Hugo says it’s no trap – he tested this version on livestock and set aside a successful batch. He takes test tubes of antidote from a safe. It’s concentrated and once diluted - enough to cure every infected person in the city.
Fish tells Oswald that they will rule the city together. Oswald agrees, but first he will kill Ed. Fish promises that he will, and all those who tried to stand in their way. Oswald looks rapt. As they begin to leave, there’s a noise. Fish calls out:
Who’s there - show yourself
It’s more Cirque de Soleil assassins. I tire of this. A huge fight breaks out.
Harvey's doorless car.
Harvey is getting a call about an ice and fire fight in a slaughterhouse, which he mentions to Jim. Jim just snarls in response
Just drive the damn car
Are we sure the virus didn't amplify Jim's innate tendency to behave like a prick?
Back to the slaughterhouse. Jim and Harvey enter the fight. Jim starts taking down assassins, flinging them about, killing them for no good reason. In the middle of his killing frenzy, he runs Fish through with one of the assassin’s sword. She gasps, and drops the antidote.
You damn fool
Oswald screams
Fish!
He runs to her side. Fish calls his name in return, and he holds her as she folds to the ground. He’s desperate – telling her it will be OK and they will get help. Jim watches wide-eyed behind them, the virus seemingly clearing as soon as he’d realised what he’d done.
Fish shakes her head.
No – I’ve done this enough to know when I'm finished
Oswald is still trying to comfort her, but she interrupts.
Listen to me. Make this city yours, or you burn it to the ground.
With that, her eyes become fixed and staring. Oswald weeps. This is the third time now that Oswald has held a parent (in this case a parent figure) as they died. The third actual time.
Jim still looks aghast at what he’s done, gaping down at the scene in front of him. Hell – everyone’s aghast – the place is silent.
Oswald turns, enraged and grief-stricken, running at Jim.
Ppeople call me a monster, but you – Jim Gordon, you are the monster!
The attack puts the virus back in charge and Jim grabs Oswald by the throat, lifting him high in the air.
You're right. I am a monster.
Harvey hits Jim on the back of head to force him to drop Oswald. He asks Strange if there’s more antidote. He says there is – he only needs one thing….
And it’s Jervis, sitting nervously alone in the back of an Arkham ambulance. We hear sounds – and Butch opens the door. Jervis is fidgeting, twisting his hands high on his chest as this is happening, and it makes him look oddly vulnerable and childlike.
Tabitha is nearby, and Barbara and Ed lean against a car, talking. Ed’s sources have told him about the possible antidote and, he smirks, Fish’s death. But Ed knows they’re missing an ingredient:
This bozo
Ed – you’re wearing a shiny green suit. Let’s not fling insults. Meanwhile, Jervis is wide-eyed and smiling
Are you my saviours? Are you the one to set me free?
(An aside – Jesus, poor Jervis. And that’s something I never thought I’d write – but he really is set up as incredibly vulnerable here.)
Barbara smirks,
Not exactly. Let’s make Gotham beg
Ed smiles, while Jervis looks like he’s just realised this is not a good place to be.
Back on the streets again with Bruce, seeking out the Yuyan building. He has an auditory flashback to his ‘sensei’s’ instructions – which is handy, since his endless wittering about pain and destiny had become white noise to me. He finds the building, and enters.
It’s a room with a huge statue in the middle. Bruce touches the statue, a secret door opens, and he walks down a stone spiral staircase. At the bottom, there’s a stone passageway – which he starts to walk down. Something seems to speed past behind him
Lucius and Alfred outside on the street have stopped outside the building. Alfred tells Lucius to let Harvey know where they are, and Alfred goes in, eyeing the ornate door/statue thing.
Meanwhile, down in the tunnels, more of the slaughterhouse assassins surround Bruce.
(An aside - someone's been playing too much Mortal Kombat)
Another assassin appears behind Bruce, and makes them stand aside. Bruce enters a room with a large pool in the middle (I feel like I’m playing a text-based adventure)
There’s a voice
I wouldn't touch that, Bruce.
This is Ra’s al Ghul. He tells Bruce his sensei died but succeeded – he led Bruce to him. He is a demon, a saint, a ghost. He’s seen things that would shake the core of Bruce’s beliefs. But in all his travels, he never found a true heir. He asks Bruce if he’s ready. Bruce says he is –but Ra’s says he failed. Bruce says Alfred distracted him.
Ra’s nods.
I know
He puts his hand on Bruce’s face - like Fish with Oswald, another proxy parental relationship. As he does so, Alfred is dragged in. Bruce stares at him
Don't be so surprised - can't get rid of me that easily.
He then banters a bit about the ninjas getting better of him before glancing at Ra’s delivering one of the best – if not the best – line of the episode.
You alright mate? What you come as?
(An aside - The British instinct to mock even in the worst circumstances does my heart good. Anything grandiose and melodramatic must immediately be made ridiculous.)
Ra’s laughs, but then hits Alfred. Bruce is to embrace his future by killing Alfred. He talks about destiny and joining him as he hands Bruce the sword. Alfred speaks.
He's wrong. There's no other way to put it. Your destiny is to be Bruce Wayne. And one day you're going to remember that, and how much I love you. I remember when mum and dad brought you home and gave you to me. A tiny defenceless little creature. Look after him, they said. I held you, and you looked at me, and at that moment I decided I would do anything for you. So if this is what you need to do, you crack on.
Bruce has tears in his eyes. Alfred repeats himself.
You do it.
Bruce raises the sword, scream, and stabs him. He almost immediately starts to shake his head, the mist clearing, scattered hallucinations. As his vision clears, he sees Alfred, and realises what he’s done. There’s a whispered ‘Bruce’ from Alfred, and he pulls the sword from him. Alfred falls to the floor. Bruce weeps. Ra’s laughs
You've broken through your conditioning. Impressive
Bruce is enraged
You don't control me anymore! I will never be your heir!
Ra’s says he will:
No – your strength fulfils the prophecy, you are my knight in the darkness
Bruce’s voice cracks
You made me kills Alfred!
Bashir’s voice gets all whispery
Use the waters Bruce. Our time will come
Bruce scoops water from the pool, and pours it on the wound. It seems to cauterize and Alfred splutters – alive.
Part two to follow.....
Thoughts?
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Did Donald say this in Esteban too?
Cooper: The meeting is set for the National Museum.
In 04-09 there’s another museum location
You’ll be going to Cuba undercover, as tourists.
Samar: He’ll be going. Not me. You may be fine with doing this job, no matter how you feel. I can’t.
“No matter how you feel.”
That’s the emphasis.
Ressler: How you feel? How about how Keen feels? Forget about what she did and try to figure out why she did it.
“Try to figure out why she did it.”
Liz is his partner. Liz comes first before the job. The job is the excuse to defend Liz.
Even though she lied to him. Used him. Took advantage of him the man is joyous and livid all at the same time.
Is he still livid now? Or might he do something to prevent Keen from ever leaving him again?
Samar: I have, and someday, maybe I’ll be okay with it.
That’s Thursday.
But right now I’m not.
What? You’re okay with this?
No. But for now, I accept it. You’ll be going alone.
Till he gets his real partner back.
Esteban: The Americans want me dead, so our relationship dies with me, so I get embarrassed.
Ressler: Look, I’m not here to kill you, pal, I’m here to tell you that Raymond Reddington wants to see you.
Stewmaker: “I’m not the guy you kill I’m the guy you pay.”
Esteban: Oh, so now the US government is Reddington’s messenger.
Yes.
Ressler: Oh, you know how it works. The American government has deals with all kinds of scumbags.
Plot point.
Liz: I faked my death to have a normal life. There’s nothing normal about being held prisoner.
Kirk: A temporary inconvenience. You’ll see in time that the normal life you want, I’m the only one who can give that to you.
Did this play out? Is he talking about the house and money?
Ressler: We have an ETA on that plane? There it's is! Go back to 318 what did "Tom" say after Liz water broke? "What's our ETA?" This is Bokenkamp and Eisendrath this is what Ressler says for the past 4 years in dialogue. Not Tom and not last season until THAT episode whenLiz gave birth.?
Red: Your job here is done, Donald.
Ressler: Like hell it is. [there it is again. In 3/18 only Tom said it.] [the cruelty and deliberate how should I say it, endless water boarding to a faithful audience is sick. And they really don't deserve the amazing cast they have, fans, and writers.] of 3B I came here to get Keen. I’m not leaving without her.
Red: You think I’m gonna let you tag along so you can inform the people who kidnapped Elizabeth they have the right to remain silent? I appreciate your assistance, but I’m not interested in having an ethical debate with you about whether they have the right to consult with an attorney before I put a bullet in their head. Excuse me. [ Door bell jingles ]
He didn’t kill Kirk.
What about that dirtball? I suppose you think, uh, I should be okay with letting him walk. It’s entirely up to you. You made a deal with him. Yes, in order to save Elizabeth, I made a deal with the devil of the day. I did you didn’t.
It was a charade, Aram.
Or as Red stated in 3/17 to Donald, an elaborate feint.
So Agent Keen is alive?
“Agent”
Reddington. Where are you? Tell me you have Agent Keen.
“Agent”
Red: You spent a lifetime bouncing from one authoritarian regime to the next. But this is the last stop. You’re a relic. The detente between America and Cuba makes you a man without a country. Sooner or later, both sides will want you dead. My money’s on sooner. [Red has no country]
Panabaker: You told them he worked for us? Do you have any idea what kind of blowback I’m dealing with here? And it doesn’t take long to find out who told the Cubans.
Ressler: I heard it was an anonymous tip.
Agent Ressler… Are you a traitor or– or just a moron?
You’ll find out on Thursday. Notice the red parallels? A man without a country.
Ressler: Look, the Agency was gonna assassinate Esteban… I have no direct knowledge– …so the Cubans wouldn’t find out who was feeding secrets to the CIA. [whos feeding???]
Ressler: Whoever this anonymous source is, he just saved a lot of lives. [Reddington]
Panabaker??? What are you talking about? Now that America knows about Esteban’s little torture chamber, the Cubans are going to want plausible deniability.
Panabaker: Let’s not mince words. You took it upon yourself to tell the Cubans about our–
Ressler: No, I took it upon myself to stop what Esteban was doing. Do you have any idea what that was? No, because all you care about is what Esteban was doing for you. [Ressler broke the rules]
Panabaker: There are bigger issues, Agent Ressler.
Ressler: Torture, abuse, murder. I don’t see any bigger issues than that. [Foreshadowing.]
Aram: Excuse me. Navabi: Have you heard from Reddington? No. Uh, last time I spoke to him, he was on his way to the location where Agent Keen was being held. I’m sure he’ll call. I’m sure they’re okay
Aram: . I think you were wrong not going to Cuba. I’m not saying what Agent Keen did was right, but as long as her life is in danger, as long as Agnes’s life is in danger, I think we have to put our feelings aside.
Samar: What’s happening to Liz is her own fault. I know that sounds harsh, but it’s true.
Hell yes! Audience took Samar’s side in this too.
Oh Donald Donald…
Let’s see what JR Orci wrote in Mato:
Tom: You have nothing to apologize for. You tried to help us find a normal life. I’d take that risk again.
I will guess here this led to the Keen 2 screamfest? Trust me. He’s going to be stupid again. And liz will go off again.
Liz is a fugitive?
If you don’t mind me asking, who’s on the plane? Ressler: Friend.
Samar: A fugitive.
Daly: Sounds complicated.
Sounds like their ONS is coming out.
Aram I guess??? I know this is not about me, it is about Agent Keen, but I don’t know if I have the strength to lose her again.
Who said this? None of us do.
It’s plot point.
Okay go back to lady Ambrosia and the story about liz’ parents collapse of the Soviet Union (Red took Liz after she was born. Cape May “there was a man. He wouldn’t let me see her.”
Now this:
Kate: I betrayed you for the same reason I just betrayed Nikos– to keep Elizabeth safe, just like you asked me to all those years ago, when you first put her in my arms as a baby girl, only now she has a baby girl of her own, and your existence in their lives puts them in constant danger.
Liz was an infant. Red stole his child because legally he could not claim her as his own. (I knew this was what went down! Who is reading slowburn fix? I’m revealing this now! Carla Reddington, and Jennifer and Elizabeth.
Then it was Katarina Red and Masha.
After that it was Katarina Kirk and Masha because red was married to Carla with Jennifer.
Red has two daughters. They need to go back to this. Red had two wives two families one in Moscow one in the states. Two identities. The Fulcrum was to keep him safe so he wouldn’t be a double agent–he’d have protection. Treason a man without country.
Kate helped him through all of it. Now is Kate a colleague or a relative?
Kate: Everyone wants me to make things easier for them. Cleaner. That’s what I am, after all, the Cleaner.
Tom: Just forget I brought it up.
Typical selfish prick
Kate: In my desire to make life easier for your baby, I betrayed Raymond, and now he doesn’t know what to do with me. Well, he knows what he has to do, and he wants me to make it easier for him. But I won’t. I’m not here to make him feel better, and I’m not here to make you feel better, Tom.
Unforgiving dialogue. Accountability for actions.
Kirk said they’re going to the Summer Palace. That’s all I know.
Red: Yes. I know the Summer Palace.
Sure he does. He used to play house with Katarina when Constantin was gone. That’s why Liz stuff is there. But that’s not the house he was shot in. He blew up that house in S1.
Kirk: It’s yours. It belongs to you and Agnes, of course. It’s a lovely location to raise a little girl, don’t you think?
Liz gonna get to keep this house?
The armed goons don’t do much for the landscape. Well, the coercion was necessary and temporary. All I ever intended to do was show you, prove to you who you are, who I am. And then you can choose for yourself. Like a Russian fairy tale.
That’s right. Excuse me, Elizabeth. I have much more to show you, but my physician is waiting for me. Hello, Elizabeth. My name is Katja. You can think of me as the Palace Keeper. Palace? The Summer Palace. It’s what Mr. Kirk calls the cottage. Anything you need during your stay, let me know. [ Telephone rings, beeps ] Director Cooper. Red: I know where Elizabeth is, Harold, where Kirk is taking Agnes.
And Ressler is at this house. Rescuing Liz not Tom Ressler. The same house she lived in for the summers (back nine) that Red also knows.
And it’s all Liz’ and Agnes.
Got it.
Liz: How long have you known him?
I have worked here for nine years. I took over from my mother. She worked my entire childhood maintaining the Summer Palace.
[Foreshadowing for clues in back nine]
So you know him well?
No, actually, I don’t. He hasn’t visited here in years. It’s been… too painful for him. Until now. ♪
This was my bedroom. Welcome home, Masha. ♪ I promised you the truth.
Liz: But… there was a fire. I… I shot my father. I remember.
Yes you shot Red in *his* house. Not this one. Liz lived with Red too.
Kirk: What’s the memory of a small child? You didn’t remember me or your mother or this room.
Reddington lied to you, Masha. He told you your father was dead, but thanks to you– what you did on the water– I’m very much alive. All the stories Reddington’s told you about who he is and his connection to you– he knew you were looking for answers and he took advantage of that to re-enter your life.
True to protect her from Red’s reality. He’s a man with no country. A spy master, killer, who gave up his career for one woman.
Know anyone else who’s on the verge of doing the same thing?
Kirk: Do you know why I call this cottage the Summer Palace? We came here for a vacation one July, and my little princess loved it. It’s been a palace ever since.
One summer that changed everything. She was four-leading up to the horrible fire in December.
She wasn’t at the Summer Palace. She was with her “papa” in the states.
Tom: I’m gonna find her.
No you’re not. Red did. And Orci eliminated Tom from the Summer Palace. Huge deal.
So um do ppl see where the arc is going? Expect a few drop in scenes if they hadn’t happened already.
Read more at: http://transcripts.foreverdreaming.org/viewtopic.php?f=194&t=28691
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8x7 Rewatch: Chemical Mary
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
A nice reference to Robert Frost.
Red: The road not taken.
Dembe: Beauty school?
Red: Yes. That young woman's great passion that her single father just can't understand. It pushes them apart. But instead of insisting that she understand him, he enrolls in beauty school as well and learns to better understand her.
Dembe: I think you understand Elizabeth. Probably more than you want to.
Red: Well, I'm not her father. Maybe if I were, I'd want to understand her even better. Perhaps she wouldn't be so determined to kill me.
Dembe is right, Red understands Liz better than he wants, but they also have their differences. This conversation hits back to Red's conversation with Liz in S6.
Red: I was a difficult child. People saw me one way I saw myself another. I felt misunderstood - acted out. My father fancied himself a disciplinarian. Very moralistic. Instead of trying to understand me, he excommunicated me.
Liz: And your mother?
Red: My mother - My - My mother - My mother understood. My mother understood the problems of the human heart in conflict with itself. So she understood everything. I've taught you to think like a criminal. I should've taught you to think like her. I - I should've learned to think like her.
Liz will learn to understand Red. She's halfway there, she simply isn't wearing Tom's face as Katarina is wearing Raymond's. Perhaps through Agnes, she will.
Mary: Pig, hog, runt... sow... boar. My brother's mantra. When he was a boy, he collected glass pigs. He knew everything there was to know about them.
Hog futures and a pig-masked rapist in S7. Lipstick on a pig in S6.
Glass pigs. Reminds me of Josephine with her glass figurines. They include Rogelio, who was first introduced in Alistair Pitt's episode.
The Woman: "Once upon a time, there lived a little country girl, the prettiest creature who was ever seen.”
Red: You destroyed a creature more beautiful han you could ever comprehend.
Red: I fear she may do something that she can never recover from. And of all the tragedies that you and I have experienced together, that would be the most tragic. We have to do - do everything in our power to prevent that from happening.
But I also tthink Red and Alina’s storyline is just as much for the sake of Red understanding Liz, so I think we’ll be seeing Red and Alina sharing more scenes, which I’m very happy about. I love them. I think she’ll be recovering the thumb drive from Cooper for Red next week, but Rakitin will continue playing out as I believe they’ll identify him before she gets her hands on it.
Cooper still refuses to believe Liz assisted The Freelancer's release from prison, so he finds it even harder to believe Liz is working with Chemical Mary. Ressler and Aram share in his disbelief while Alina believes it's possible because she has fresh eyes. She's not as close to Liz as they are. Cooper is then given proof that Liz assisted in The Freelancer's release.
"The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." Henry IV, Part 2 is a history play by William Shakespeare. Red and his Shakespeare references lately. Parisian references... the Temple of Love (Temple de l'Amour) and the Canal Saint-Martin.
Aram: She goes by the name of Rakitin. And when I say, uh - "she," I don't mean she's a woman. I mean, she could be. Or a man. I'm... I'm trying to alternative pronouns instead of defaulting to the generic "he" to represent a man or a woman. Rakitin could be a he or a she. Or a they.
Cooper: This is good. We know who the hacker is, but we still need to find out what he... or she... hacked.
A Rederina conversation between Aram and Cooper. Nouns and pronouns, as I continue to point out because a “ripe apple” doesn’t speak to gender, and Red told Kirk Liz is his daughter. That’s why I’m glad he confirmed he’s not her father. Fans should definitely lay that theory to rest.
Aram: Now, these photos were taken within a few days of the incident. But these... were taken a year later.
Alina: No wonder we couldn't find her.
Liz: He'd need doctors, like Koehler - someone who could change his face.
Dom: And not just once many visits over the course of a year.
They then parallel Chemical Mary with Rederina.
Take this shot of Red reading a womens magazine.
Congressman: But I think he's been here a long time. Long enough, he's become one of us. And he's using us.
Connolly: What if the reason he chose her in the first place is because he wanted to get his hands on this thing? What if that's the real reason he turned himself in?
Congressman: Based on what I know of Rakitin, he and N-13 pose an imminent threat to national security.
Red: Within 12 hours, inmate Luther Todd Braxton will break out of his cell. When he does, he will steal a classified intelligence packet that contains secrets vital to your National Security.
Much like Tom Connolly, I believe the congressman is dirty, and he’ll be the one to push Cooper for Senator just as Connolly had plans to push him up the ladder in S2. He’s basically selling Cooper the idea that N-13 (Red) is using them just as Connolly tried selling the idea that Red was using Liz for the Fulcrum. I don’t think Cooper believes that, but I do think he should’ve quashed his curiousity with the thumb drive. I think this thumb drive will get shut down quickly because Alina will recover it. Her recovery will force Cooper to take Rakitin into custody to question him. Cooper’s decision to arrest Rakitin will then force Red to extract him. With the thumb drive in Red’s hands, and the need to extract Rakitin being their final loose end, Rakitin will either die before he talks or his extraction will be successful. That’s where I stand right now in how this plays out.
Rakitin and Neville are running separate for a reason. Liz plans to out Red, and believes his thumb drive identifies N-13, so she handed it to Cooper. I do believe this to be the case because the congressman asked Cooper about it during their meeting. “Why do you say that? Did anything on the drive identify N-13?" Sikorsky told Red that Cooper isn't off limits like Liz is, and I think that has to do with Cooper himself identifying N-13 should he open it. Sikorsky doesn't want anyone identifying N-13. “A fact no one knows is true. We must do whatever we can to keep it that way." Again, this was something Dom mentioned in 5x13. No one is to know the truth of what happened to Katarina Rostova aka N-13. So Liz hands Cooper the thumb drive to get the proof she needs while she works her way through these blacklisters in order to get to Neville Townsend. I think that’s why they’re not showing Liz’s side of the story yet. I think the thumb drive will stop at Rakitin, but whatever Liz is doing... I believe her side will pick up with Neville when his men abduct her. I’m just not sure if they’ll actually abduct Liz or if they’ll abduct a double of Liz because I see they have another doppelganger blacklister coming, and I do believe Red could put one in place to protect her.
Chemical Mary's facial burns and Cooper running Red's fingerprint instead of his DNA... I'm leaving my Minister D playout on the table. I still think Ressler could be the one to figure out who Red is, and I think Red will end up threatening him with fire. They could even use this as a way to pull Liz back into the post office. EIther way, I think Ressler may get an inkling after seeing Mary’s facial burns.
One Parisian woman for another. Maddie Tolliver. Madeline Toussaint. Ressler has enough in his storylines to hand it to him. Alongside Ressler, Aram has enough in his storylines to find Liz's second memory wipe. Throw Aram’s conversation with Cooper about pronouns into a conversation wtih Ressler, and Ressler will be looking at Red’s medical file. They basically have to stick Aram and Ressler together when the time is right. Enough time and reason to have a gender-jumping conversation.
Mary: Open this door right now! I want to see her! Where is she?! The woman! I want to talk to her! Do you hear me?! Ugh! Open this door right now! I want to see her!
Again, nouns and pronouns. The woman from Paris is now the woman who abducted Mary. SHE and HER is not specific. That’s how they ran imposter Katarina in S7.
They're pushing "miracle" dialogues like it's nobody's business. They tie in their Diviner soundtrack. Everything they’re doing now is fated. It goes back to Red’s “knock on wood” in Roy Cain’s episode.
8x7 & 6x22
Sikorsky: I am told Rakitin is in play.
Dembe: The Townsend Directive. Our friend in Miami says it's in play.
I believe they’re pushing Red’s fingerprint back to Tom’s fingerprint - specifically on Diane Fowler’s record brush, running opposite the DNA CODIS search. By the time they’re done, I believe both sides will collide and head into Liz’s second memory wipe as they reveal two imposters - Tom and the woman from Paris.
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Tom Keen dialogue connections.
Christopher Hargrave & Katarina Rostova.
Red [3x14]: Two months later, she went to Cape May and left her clothes on the beach, walked into the ocean and was never seen again.
Scottie [3x22]: Next morning, Christopher was gone. The police searched everywhere, but - nothing. He was just - gone. Like his castle.
Howard [R1]: In 1988, you vanished from the Ocean City beach home your parents were renting.
Because I predict Christopher Hargrave will be central in S7.
“Katarina” knows both Raymond and Liz, but not Tom Keen.
Tom Keen is the entire reason Red reentered Liz’s life.
I believe he’ll be the reason “Katarina” will enter Liz’s life.
Tom [5x2]:That mystery has been solved. But this one hasn’t.
Ilya [6x19]: It is a mystery, right? So, we give them the answer.
Dembe [2x15]: You tell her the truth by telling her everything.
Tom [5x8]: Because I know the truth. I know everything. And now Liz is gonna know too.
Tom [4x7]: Some answers about who you were. But none about who you are or who you will be.
Liz [5x9]: She [Scottie] didn’t know who we were.
Liz [6x20]: It doesn’t matter who you were. This is who you are and who you’ll always be.
Red [1x18}: The rest will come. I promise you.
Liz [1x21]: It’s all connected. All of it. Everything. The blacklist.
Liz [1x21]: They’re connected. Maybe not all, but some.
Liz [2x19]: Is that all of it? Red: Some of it.
Tom [5x8]: I figured it out. The whole thing. Why Nik was killed. All of it.
Tom’s calculus book - sending his employer intel on Liz/Masha
Red [1x21]: Worse than I thought.
Rostova Glasnost file - insert Scottie, Tom’s mother in Kirk’s arc
Red [3x14]: It just keeps getting worse.
Ilya Koslov - if Tom’s father, insert him in “Katarina’s” arc
Red [6x19]: Because I think you may have made things worse.
Reverse Kirk’s arc with “Katarina’s” arc, Scottie with Ilya. This would give Red reason to question Scottie because he needed to be sure it was Kirk.
Red: Who hired you?
Scottie: You know exactly who hired me.
Red: I’d like to be sure.
Scottie: Alexander Kirk.
For all Red knew, it could’ve been "Katarina” coming for Liz, especially when you add in the fact that Liz actually believed her mother was coming for her in S3.
Liz: Reddington’s lying to me. I know it. If my mother wasn’t trying to abduct me, why’d Solomon ask for Masha?
Tom: Do you really think this woman is gonna hire a team of mercenaries to kidnap her own daughter?
Liz: If that woman knew Reddington, she would. She’d know it’s the only way to pry me out of his grip. But where’s she been all this time? And why’d Reddington say she’s dead?
Dom [3x20]: She’s gone because of choices you made for both of them. First Katarina and then Masha. As far as I’m concerned, you killed my entire family!
Tom [4x13]: That’s Richard Game. The man who murdered me.
Tom [3x20]: Liz was convinced that her mother was the one who tried to kidnap her. Reddington said she died years ago, but Liz didn’t believe that, and neither do I. I think we’re staring at Katarina Rostova.
Red [4x13]: All that really matters is that you vanished off the face of the earth nearly 30 years ago, and yet - here you are.
I think the Drexel painting may have leaned him more in Kirk’s direction.
I'm pointing this dialogue connect out for a reason. Had Tom killed Scottie, he'd still have Howard, so those answers wouldn’t die until Howard dies. Unless Howard isn't Tom’s father. This speaks to the Ilya connection I added above.
Red [3x22]: If you kill her, the answers you’ve been looking for your entire life will die with her.
Liz [4x7]: He’s gonna die because a bus accident delayed some lab work, and all the answers I’m looking for are gonna die with him.
Liz's mother -
Red: I killed Sam because he was in pain and he wanted to die and because I had to protect you from the truth.
Liz: What truth? The only memory I have of my real father is from the night of the fire. I remember him pulling me out of the flames saving me.
Tom's father -
Tom: I told Liz I would, that it doesn’t matter. And it doesn’t. It wouldn’t, except that you told me not to let Scottie Hargrave know that I am her son, that if I did I would never find the truth I’ve been looking for. What does that mean?
Red: He’s dead, Tom.
Tom: What truth? You knew my father.
Liz -
Liz: Mr. Kaplan was my nanny.
Cooper: Somehow I’m not surprised. She loved you so much.
Liz: And now she’s gone. Just like Sam. And my mom. Everyone who knew me best, knew the answers about who I was, where I came from.
Tom -
Tom: My father is dead. She’s the only one left who knows who I am.
Red: You’re Elizabeth’s husband and Agnes’ father.
Tom: Who I was.
Christopher -
Scottie: My perfect baby boy. He loved the water. Found that necklace in a trinket shop during a trip to Ocean City. We had rented a house that summer, spent the whole week on the beach building sand castles with drawbridges and moats.That night, Howard and I had a big fight. Too much to drink. Next morning, Christopher was gone. The police searched everywhere, but - nothing. He was just - gone. Like his castle. It’s been 28 years, and not a day goes by where I don’t walk into a room - hoping, praying he’ll be there.
Katarina -
Shelter Worker: I think we’re all running from something. I think we’ve all had to do things to survive. Everyone here has a past. Whatever your story is, it’s your story, and yours alone. Most importantly, I think the woman who stepped into that ocean is dead. The one who emerged has new choices, a new future, and I’m here to help her.
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Every time I see a Keen2 shipper praise Tom for the husband and father he was, I can’t help but laugh my ass off. It’s as if they’ve been watching an entirely different show than I've been. Aside from my many theories involving Tom, the way in which they’ve written his character is another huge reason I believe Agnes is a Keenler baby and Keenler is endgame. A quick look at Tom Keen as a husband and father.
I’ve stated this many times, as I believe it rather strongly. Tom would’ve never been able to offer Liz a normal life. That which was stated in season four and proven in season five. Tom would’ve never been able to set aside his spy life for the sake of family.
Red: Tom is very good at what he does. It defines him. He can no sooner choose to stop than a great white shark can choose to stop swimming and eating. He will do what he does.
Liz: I trusted Tom - forgave every lie, believed every promise that he would stop keeping things from me. And then he went off on some secret quest and got himself killed.
Something to which they’ve been writing opposite for Ressler during the course of his hunt for Liz in season three and again with his brother in season four.
Ressler: I mean, this place - this job, it’s - After Audrey died, I came to work the very next day. It’s so easy to lose perspective, forget what really matters.
Samar: Your brother?
Ressler: He’s fine. But he might not have been. I should’ve been there.
Samar: You were working. Whether Reddington is involved or not, it’s your job.
Ressler: He’s my brother. I should’ve been there.
Liz was living out Tom’s dream scenario rather than her Djinn fantasy, and family came second. Even the child he believed to be his daughter came second. After faking Liz’s death, he left Agnes to take on mission after mission. Photographing Panabaker and Scottie, pulling the bank job with Solomon, poisoning Peter Pruitt, switching the oil truck. Gone on a mission while Kirk was trying to kidnap Agnes, then blamed Scottie because she was there - where he should’ve been.
Tom: What did you do with my little girl, huh?
Scottie: My people received word Kirk was on the move. I alerted the FBI, and because of it, more people weren’t hurt. Your daughter is safe, and she’s getting the medical attention she needs.
An issue that came up again in season four.
Liz: How’d it go?
Tom: Honestly, it was great. I was thinking about what you said, about why I needed that. Truth is, I still don’t know. But what I do know, is that this family’s the most important thing in my life. I don’t wanna lose it.
Liz: We just arrested a woman who would’ve done anything to stay with the person she loved, but she lost him anyway.
Tom: I’m not going anywhere.
“I’m not going anywhere.” Yet he did, when he took off for Halcyon, leaving his wife and supposed child behind. Left them behind long enough that Agnes was calling for her Grandpa when Tom tried putting her down in the deleted scene. Again in season five. Instead of handing Liz the suitcase as Kaplan specifically asked him to, he decided to make it his mission to investigate it himself, and he lied to Liz about it.
Tom: I wanted to tell you that I love you, Liz, and that I’m never gonna leave you, ever again.
He didn’t even bother to go home first. That normal life - Tom has been promising Liz from the jump, was something he wasn’t capable of because he couldn’t let go of the spy life. Since season one.
1x10 -
Tom: In what world is any of this okay? The fact that you don’t see that, that this is somehow normal to you? A man told me that he was gonna kill you. I’ve been attacked, I’ve been accused of murder, and now people are watching us. Apparently, there are cameras in our bedroom.
Liz: They’re gone.
Tom: Do you believe that? I need us together and safe. I meant what I said earlier. We need to leave this place.
1x11 -
Tom: So, I applied for a job in Lincoln. Before you throw that coffee cup at me, just hear me out. Okay? There are great schools. There is low crime. There’s an FBI field office. I just want to be a normal, boring couple - no hidden cameras, no fake passports, no surveillance vans outside.
2x19 -
Liz: I thought you’d be gone.
Tom: That was the plan. Then I thought maybe if I stayed, I’d have a shot at a normal life.
2x21 -
Tom: Alright, dream scenario. We finish our coffee, we hop on my boat, we leave, okay. We never look back. Preferably, we take our clothes off at some point.
3x7 -
Tom: Some operative I am. I barely recognize my own wife. Ex-wife. You look great. That? Having to hide, that’s gonna end. You’re gonna have a normal life, Liz. A family, kids, everything you always wanted.
3x12 -
Tom: Pro - chance for a normal life, family, doting husband with rock-hard abs.
3x17 -
Liz: I am attempting to build a life with the father of my child. A normal life with two parents who love one another. With everything you know about me, can’t you see that? Can’t you see how important that is to me? To my child?
Tom: I told myself no more secrets. And I promised you that I would be completely honest, no matter what. Today the Major found me. Gina told him where to find me, and he came into our apartment and tried to kill me. But he’s dead. And I, uh…
Liz: You killed him?
Tom: Uh, no. Actually, Gina did, but that’s a long story. Look, what I want you to know, is that it happened because I made it clear that I’m out. I’m done with those people and that life. But there are things that I did, and… and… and I might be done with those things, but I can’t promise you that those things are done with me. And I can’t promise you that it’s not gonna happen… tomorrow or next week or… or five years from now. And I would understand, frankly, if you didn’t want to deal with any of…
4x1 -
Aram: So Agent Keen is alive? Uh, but her funeral and her death … She faked her death. Why would she do that?
Ressler: To get away from Reddington. So that her and Tom and Agnes could have a normal life.
4x2 -
Liz: I faked my death to have a normal life. There’s nothing normal about being held prisoner.
Kirk: A temporary inconvenience. You’ll see in time that the normal life you want, I’m the only one who can give that to you.
This bit was fed again in 4x20. Because Kaplan believed Red was the one holding Liz emotionally hostage, but Red wasn't the one who pulled the second memory wipe on Liz. I believe Tom was, and believe he has been holding Liz hostage since she found out she was pregnant and was led to believe he was the father.
Kate: I’ve watched you hold Elizabeth emotionally hostage. I never thought you’d hold her physically hostage as well.
Kate: This is my fault. If anything happens to Elizabeth or the baby…
Tom: You have nothing to apologize for. You tried to help us find a normal life. I’d take that risk again.
I also believe this normal life hasn’t been possible because of Tom, something that Kaplan remained blind to since the start of the show, as shown in their pre-pilot scene.
Kate: You can’t just stroll into her life after all these years. This is a mistake.
Red: I’m aware of your feelings, Kate.
Kate: Raymond, stop. The instant you walk through that door, the damage will be done. You’ll destroy her innocence, everything we’ve been fighting to be preserved. You’ll never undo it.
Red: As I feared would happen, elements from Katarina’s past are circling Elizabeth like a pack of wolves in the night. I put Tom Keen in her life to keep an eye on her, and he married her.
Kate: This isn’t about Tom Keen. It’s about your need for control.
Red: Indeed, I need to control the danger to Elizabeth. I’ve built a vast criminal network predicated on that very principal. It’s time to live up to my mission statement.
I believe that’s why Red framed Tom for Fowler’s murder behind Kate’s back. Because I don’t believe Kate knew as much as Red, so I felt her support for him was a result of that blindness, as well as her own want to protect Liz’s innocence. Something I felt Tom destroyed when he entered her life.
4x12 -
Liz: You know, Tom and I were just starting to find some semblance of normalcy. And you had to just sweep in, drag him back down your rabbit hole. There must be dozens of contract operatives just like him. Why him?
Red: Tom is very good at what he does. It defines him. He can no sooner choose to stop than a great white shark can choose to stop swimming and eating. He will do what he does. But at least if he’s doing it for me, he won’t risk a double-cross, unlike with the vast majority of his prospective employers. Because unlike them, I genuinely care for him. Or rather you, and your daughter.
5x4 -
Tom: Yeah, completely amazing, but like, something parents would do.
Liz: Oh! Yeah. If either of us had even remotely normal parents.
Tom: Now, that’s the word I was looking for. Lunch sounds so completely normal. You know I love normal.
Liz: At lunch no calls, no interruptions.
Tom: Agreed. Just you and me being normal.
Liz: Come on. I should just be able to have lunch with my husband like a normal person.
Tom: Yeah, well, you are not a normal person. You don’t have a normal job, and that’s okay ’cause that’s what I love about you.
Liz: You said you loved normal.
Tom: Well, I did. And I do. But normal. Abnormal. Deviant. Whatever you are, I love - except hurt, alright? So go save the day, catch the bad guy, whatever you got to do. Just don’t get yourself shot.
And it was Tom who almost got Liz shot by Garvey’s man in 5x8.
5x6 -
Liz: The wife - he lied to her. Led her to believe he worked at an actual travel agency, had a normal life. She had no idea.
Then they reminded us of season one Tom because of his repeat. Because Red didn’t fail Liz in his promise to her, Tom did. And Tom didn’t just fail Liz, he failed Agnes too. That’s why Ressler’s gonna be her real father.
“I’m never gonna leave you, ever again.”
Promises made, promises broken by a man willing to swear on his supposed daughter’s life while getting his thrill going up against Alexander Kirk.
Tom: I’m a dad. Alexander Kirk took my little girl. And I’ll do anything to get her back. So, if you pick up your hand and that is your intel on Kirk, then on the life of my daughter - you have my word that my intel on you will be destroyed.
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My prediction.
“He told you not to trust him.”
I predict the Wicked Wolf will find and gather intel from a single source.
I’ve stood by my belief that S7′s tagline is for Tom Keen’s character. They have a choice among several characters they coud lead with, but I’ve eliminated several due to their likeliness. I unchecked Howard because he’s in prison. I unchecked Scottie because that alignment would be too powerful. Kirk is possible, but I feel him less likely, and he wouldn’t offer much intel for Tom Keen. Matias Solomon is too close to Scottie. This leaves Gina.
Reasons why Gina would be perfect:
1. She fits the half truth - whole truth concept that runs through the series. Add in the double go-box. If the mark is tied to the Townsend Directive, which I’ve been considering, definitely.
2. The triple parallel. Wicked Wolf having lost her husband, Liz having lost her husband, Gina having lost the man she fell in love with. She may have moved on from Tom by now, but she’d still be a great source for intel.
3. Dialogue parallel, 6x22 back to 3x17.
Agnes: Mommy, who’s that funny-looking man?
Liz: It’s a long story. But we finally have time to tell it.
Liz: You killed him?
Tom: Uh, no. Actually, Gina did, but that’s a long story.
4. The Tom - Wicked Wolf opposite parallel.
Tom: I want out. Gina, I never thought I would, but I do. We don’t save people, Gina. We watch them drown. And I’m tired of hurting people. I want to start pulling people up instead of holding them down. And I can’t think of a better place to start than right here with you. So, I could end this right now. I could go find the Major, and I could end him too. Or we can just agree to just walk away. I don’t come after you, and you don’t come after me or my family.
Gina: I should have said yes that night in Budapest.
Tom: No, Gina. Listen to me. I’m asking you to help me walk away. Please. Someday, maybe someone will do the same thing for you.
Tom: Look, what I want you to know is that it happened because I made it clear that I’m out. I’m done with those people and that life. But there are things that I did, and - and - and I might be done with those things, but I can’t promise you that those things are done with me. And I can’t promise you that it’s not gonna happen tomorrow or next week or - or five years from now. And I would understand, frankly, if you didn’t want to deal with any of -
Woman: Early in the morning. Still dark. You’d called me. It was a simple assignment. I was to drive a couple of miles into the city. I was to meet Dominic at Vukov Station. Give him a package. I was to sneak out.
Woman: I had to bring him in. Pyotr was so suspicious. He knew what my old life had cost me. But I couldn’t let you down. By the time Pyotr woke up, I planned to be back in bed as if nothing happened. But I was wrong. He knew if I was slipping out at 4:00 a.m. that I was back in the game. He kept screaming, “You were done! You were out!” I insisted it was my last job. An old friend had asked me for a favor. A desperate friend, someone who I trusted - someone I could never turn down. But you weren’t really my friend. Were you?
5. The frame parallel, back to Minister D’s episode. My Tom-domino for Liz's Cabal frame parallels Katarina framing the real Red. I believe Ilya and Wicked Wolf parallel Gina and Tom - two spies that were in a romantic relationship. Gina willing to take the fall for Fokin’s murder. Wicked Wolf willing to do one last job for Ilya. I believe Tom and Liz parallel Ilya and the real Rostova - our Red. Not true love, true friendship. Ilya putting them in danger with Dom’s Belgrade plan. Tom putting them in danger, and often. I could add plenty more parallels, but it would take a while for me to find them. Perhaps another time.
6. The letter, deposit box, and photograph parallel.
Ted King: Near the end, Virginia wrote her a letter. Uh, I don’t know if she wrote any other letters. But by that time, she was in hospice, so she asked me to mail it. It was her way of clearing the air, I guess. Get some closure before she -
Liz: We have looked through all of Zanetakos’ phone messages, all her records. There wasn’t a single message from Tom.
Red: Perhaps they exchanged letters.
Liz: There’s nothing between them. My husband is innocent.
--
Ted King: Well, anyway. She gave me the address, and I mailed it.
Ressler: Mailed it where?
Ted King: Post Office box. Upstate New York.
Ressler: Do you remember the address?
Tom: The key in the lamp I know you found it. Take it to Radford Bank. Box number 3929.
--
Agent: Guys, you might want to check this out. Found this by her bed.
[Photo of Tom Keen]
Ressler: Give us a minute ... This is evidence. Listen. Keen, whatever you think this may mean, I admire what you’re doing, standing up for your husband. But I think we both know it’s time for you to protect yourself.
Tom: He had a lot of family photos in his office, but only one placed where he could always see it. And I didn’t think there was anything special about it until I realized that it was taken by someone very special to him.
Lena: It’s not what you think. I can’t help you.
Ted King: I found a photograph between the pages of a book in the bedroom. She said it was the only photo she had of her daughter, and that they’d had a falling-out and that she hoped that they would reconnect at some point.
7. The Keen glasses. Back to the glasses in the suitcase Tom stole in 5x8, and Garvey’s glasses in 5x19. Gina reintroduced the Keen glasses in S3 when they pulled their diamond heist.
8. Her lead-in to their final big bad, which I’ve been predicting for quite a while now. Furthered by Kat dropping Agnes off in the S6 finale. Gina could easily pull Scottie in as the next big bad just as she pulled her in for Liz’s 3x17 wedding.
Add in Matias Solomon.
9. My Tom domino theory. Gina could (quite literally) reveal all of them:
Understand, these are my theories.
Gina and Tom were lovers. I believe their affair could’ve continued after Tom and Liz married in 2011. Tom worked for “Constantin Rostov.” I believe Gina acted as his handler or intermediary. Rostov issued Tom’s three passports through Red’s trusted forger when he claimed they were issued by Red. Tom murdered Victor Fokin, a kill commissioned by Rostov. He framed Red and Gina for this murder in an effort to protect Rostov as well as himself. As a result, Red framed Tom for the murder of Diane Fowler by planting his record brush. Gina revealing the truth about Fokin’s murder would lead to the Fowler frame.
Tom was hired by Rostov to locate and safely return the woman he believed was his long-lost child, Masha Rostova. Tom believed Rostov was Liz’s father. His 1x22 “Your father’s alive” whisper was in reference to Rostov. Tom had Rostov’s fabricated DNA report all along, while claiming to have found it in Kirk’s SVR file. He trusted in this report as Rostov had, which gave him reason to turn against Red. Tom’s attempt to rescue Agnes in Gaia’s episode pushed Rostov to take stem cells from her. Tom gave Liz the DNA report to exchange her as a donor. An effort to save Agnes from the dangers of a stem cell donation. Incompatibility caused Rostov to collapse in the orange box.
The Cabal targeted Tom when he turned himself in for killing the Harbormaster, Eugene Ames. They preyed on his desire to protect Liz, which led him to reveal her born identity. This reveal caused The Director to advance the timeline for his plan to return the world to a Cold War posture. They continued their con, having Tom take part in Red’s assassination attempt. I believe they told him about the Fulcrum, led him to believe Red was using Liz to get it, so he pulled her into his warehouse to inform her of this. I then believe he signalled for Gina to follow Liz from his warehouse to her meeting with Red, and it was she who took the shot, putting a bullet in Red’s chest rather than his head.
I believe Tom took Liz to Dr. Krilov to hide his involvement in Red’s shooting, and Liz pulled his gun on Connolly while under the influence of Krilov-administered drugs. I believe Ressler is the father of Agnes, and her conception is hidden within this second memory manipulation. I basically believe Tom played the fool, helping The Director frame Liz, which set her on the run for her life - when all he wanted to do was protect her. I believe he tried to confess this to Ressler, twice. Upon his initial return in S3, and again at the cabin before Solomon and his men lit it up.
10. All these dominoes in mind, I end with Constantin Rostov/Alexander Kirk. The biggest piece of intel that would be of use to Wicked Wolf. She could either return with this little bit of information, or reach out to Kirk for more. Reaching out to Kirk for more would get her killed. Even moreso because I believe Kirk would inform Red of this. Returning if she learns anything of the Red-Rostov war. Kirk let him go because he’s Katarina Rostova.
Tom’s whisper back to Red’s whisper.
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