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#haitani ran imagines

sunaluv · 5 months

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'IS SHE TAKEN?'

in which someone asks your man if you're single

feat: ran, gojo

RAN

the club setting was filled with more excitement tonight. don't get it twisted, any club or event hosted by the haitanis was guaranteed to be the event of the day, good vibes, hot people, and lots of money to be made. but when one of the brothers was actually present at the club? something about their aura seemed to bring out the vibes in people.

ran's hooded gaze watched adoringly at you across the club, the setting bringing nostalgia to the first time you met. ever the social butterfly you were, accepting another phone number from one of the girlfriends you made tonight. the other members of the roundtable looked at one another, wondering if the haitani brother was even present.

"no wonder you're so distracted, boss," the man next to him nudged him with his elbow, to which ran side-eyed him. "she's a looker, d'ya think she's single?"

your boyfriend appeared neutral as he let the guy ramble on about how hot you were, and what he would do to you given the chance. he missed the harsh roll of ran's eyes. if he didn't know you were spoken for, he would make sure this guy knew by the end of the night.

as if on queue, you waved bye to your new friends and started to make your way to the table. eyes followed your figure as you passed, but that was to be expected when the prettiest girl at the club walked past.

"hey, sweetheart," his soft lips pressed against the crown of your head. "you alright?"

"i'm good! a little tired though," you let out a deep sigh, melting into his arms. "these heels have been killing me..."

wordlessly, his large hands had your ankles in his lap, undoing the buckles on your heels and rubbing tender circles into the irritated skin.

he smirked at the relieved sigh that left your lips. "my buddy here has something to ask you, sweets."

the man next to you seemed to go silent since your arrival at the table, the consequences of his actions just hitting. a deep breath followed by a gulp as he wiped his damp hands against his slacks. he almost flinched when your hooded, yet dominating gaze met his own eyes, but after remembering who and where he was, he gained his composure almost as quickly as it left.

"nah 'ts nothin'," he waved his hand. "just a passing thought, is all..."

others both around the roundtable and those dancing near it tried not to make it obvious that they were watching the exchange going down. they found themselves pitying a character who would not deserve it, under different circumstances. but, as discussed, the haitani aura seems to throw things off of balance.

if he didn't want to talk, ran would do it for him. "he wants to know if your single, claims he could give you a lay better than your man could,"

your eyes left the man, instead looking over your boyfriends face in silent communication.

'you and i both know he can't'

'...i know, my love, just humor me every once in a while?'

'you're such a character sometimes, haitani'

'you love it though'

eyes darted between you, awaiting your response, thus his sentence in anticipation. he didn't know what telepathic language you were communicating in, but he was glad to not hear his fate get discussed right in front of him.

"i'm very flattered, but i have a boyfriend, sorry." your response was dry towards him, but the gaze you held with ran was anything but.

catching wind of what was about to happen, you excused yourself from the table, leaving a kiss on the corner of rans mouth, whispering a 'be good' in his ear before leaving.

whatever happened after your departure was not your business, after all.

GOJO

"hey man," a hand belonging to an unfamiliar man clasped on satorus shoulder. "do you know if the girl you came here with has a boyfriend?"

you had dragged your boyfriend to one of your friend's parties, much to his dismay. he's sworn off drinking after geto's blackmail folder started getting a bit thick, meaning there was nothing fun to do other than socialise, but he didn't want to after people flocked to him for the wrong reasons.

so now he was maybe the only sober one in this lively scene, which leads to the current events.

he spoke your name for clarity. "uhh, I'm not sure. you can go ask her if you want. ill even put in a good word for you."

has this man been a fraction more sober, he would've questioned why the blindfolded man's smile was so wide, or why he was so willing to help, but alas, this was a party and alcohol was supplied.

"thanks, dude! you're such a lifesaver."

satoru almost felt bad for the guy. he was practically buzzing whilst traversing through the sweaty bodies in search of you. he felt bad until he remembered how bored he was before this happened, he has to put himself first sometimes.

after a couple stumbles, reroutes and a rest break, they had finally found you in your angelic beauty, laughing with a group of girls he didn't know.

he thought it was quite cute how the guy seemed to become more shy at the sight of you, and satoru couldn't blame him. had he been someone more normal, he would act the same in your presence.

one of the girls caught sight of the pair by the entry and gestured you towards them. your face softened slightly at the sight of your six-foot-something boyfriend and his... friend?

"hey toru," you smiled, before looking at the other man. "who’s this?"

satoru said nothing, slapping the guy a little too harshly on the back before stepping back. the floor was his.

"hey," he breathed out, before introducing himself. "i saw you come in with your friend earlier, and just wanted to know if you were seeing anyone?"

your heart rate picked up, but not for the reason the guy was hoping. why was gojo like this? did he enjoy seeing you suffer?

he obviously did as when you looked over your shoulder to the said man, he gave you a big, encouraging grin with both thumbs up. the audacity.

he had thrown you to the wolves and left you to fend for yourself.

"uhm..." you breathed, trying not to shatter the poor guy's heart. "i have a boyfriend, unfortunately. sorry."

"what do you mean, unfortunately!" satoru mocked you from behind the guy. "I'm a total catch, right?" he turned to the guy. "right??"

though delayed, the guy had finally come to the realisation he had been punked by the man who egged him on the whole time. his face burst into a deep shade of red, apologising profusely before rushing back into the crowd.

"you're such an ass, gojo."

"the last name huh?" he scratched the back of his neck. "I'm in for it arent i?"

#tokyo revengers x reader #jjk x reader #tokyo rev x reader #tr x reader #haitani ran imagines #ran x reader #ran haitani x reader #haitani ran x reader #tokyo revengers headcannons #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #jujustu kaisen x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk imagines #jujutsu kaisen #tokyo rev drabbles #tokyo revengers imagine

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haitani-maki · 18 days

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𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢 𝐑𝐚𝐧

•𝙼𝙸𝙽��𝚁𝚂 𝙳𝙾𝙽’𝚃 𝙸𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃

•Contains NSFW links ⚠

•It is just headcanon

•You're free to disagree, just stay respectful

•English is not my first language

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who's more tender with you

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who wraps you in his arms to sleep

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran is a yellow flag, you rarely argue, and when you do, it's because he's annoying you in some way

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran likes to give you pet names

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who's a fan of pda

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who doesn't care about boobs or butts, he just wants to use the soft flesh as a pillow, he will feel like he's in heaven

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran's love language is physical touch and give you gifts

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran will take you to good restaurants. Sometimes he will ask to speak to the chef to compliment the food, you won't know how to react

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who likes to see you on the dance floor of your club, he says it's not the same without you there

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran bonten may not be able to spend much time with you, but he will leave bodyguards to take you wherever you want and carry your shopping bags

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who has a temper and could be stubborn, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't do anything for you

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran is good at keeping control, but that changes when someone does or says something to you. At Bonten, he would either get rid of the person himself or order Sanzu to torture them

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran he would be grumpy with everyone, but he would melt at the sight of your smile, the only exception to his bad mood, you made him soft

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran will propose to you and start calling you his wife, he loves it

☾ ⋆⁺₊bf!ran who dreams of starting a family with you, he wants two children, he thinks siblings are important

₊ ⊹bf!ran's going to fuck you romantically

₊ ⊹bf!ran's going to fuck you like his slut

₊ ⊹bf!ran is going to let you use his face as a seat

₊ ⊹bf!ran will give you kisses on the forehead and give you compliments while he fucks your throat

₊ ⊹bf!ran who knows every inch of your body. Every inch that makes you moan his name

₊ ⊹bf!ran who's going to give you multiple orgasms

₊ ⊹bf!ran might even give you a facial

₊ ⊹bf!ran who's going to fulfill your fantasies

₊ ⊹bf!ran's sometimes it will whisper in your ear how much it loves you as your cock slides inside you

₊ ⊹bf!ran who will play with you at inappropriate times

₊ ⊹bf!ran who can't get enough of the beautiful noises you make to him

₊ ⊹bf!ran who smiles when he sees you squirming underneath him, too fucked to reply

₊ ⊹bf!ran who's going to mark you (good luck hiding that)

₊ ⊹bf!ran who will punish you if you're a brat, denying your orgasms for hours or making you cum every 10 minutes without a break

₊ ⊹bf!ran will show you his kind side if you behave

₊ ⊹bf!ran who's going to turn your legs into jellies

₊ ⊹bf!ran who loves you and your hole, he loves to see your cock disappear into your hole, you will be his death

₊ ⊹bf!ran who will absolutely fill you up over and over again

⚠These videos don't belong to me, credit to their respective owners

twitter - twitter - twitter - twitter - twitter - twitter

A curiosity I used: At the end of the Puzz Reve Christmas event, there's a line from Ran and Rindou

Ran:おっ、モンブランアンジェ。。。ここのシェフやるな

Oh. Angelina Mont Blanc, huh? The chef knows his stuff.

Rindou: おい、そこのお前、シェフ呼んで来いよ兄貴が礼を言いたいってさ~

Oi, you over there. Call the chef over. My brother wants to show his thanks.

©Reblogs are welcome, do not copy or translate

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twindevilgang · 5 months

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Why is he always so close?’ You always wondered why Ran would be so close to you when you talked. The first thought was that he just couldn’t hear very well but that wasn’t the case at all when you set some ‘test’ on him. You paid a lot more attention to him after that.

How he would bend down to talk to others, he would do the same thing to you but he’ll get even closer. How he would squint his eyes sometimes to read or see something from afar. Putting the pieces together you have concluded that your boyfriend needed glasses. You don’t know why he hasn’t gone to the eye doctor yet, maybe he was just embarrassed but his brother has glasses.

“We need to get you to an eye doctor Ran. I think you need glasses” you say one day after you had come over to his apartment.

“I do not know what you’re talking about. My eyesight is perfectly fine”

“Then why the hell are you squinting at me like you can’t see?” You deadpan. He shrugs.

A few days later he still denies that he has horrible eyesight. You try to convince him to go and get checked out but his answer is always no. Once more you try, one night when you are back at his place in the comfort of his couch, watching a random show that plays.

Your finger twirls around his loose hair “You know” you start “You’ll look pretty hot with glasses on Ran, don’t you think?”

His hand crawls up to your side squeezing you a bit closer to his body “You think so?”

“I know so,”

he thinks for a moment, maybe a little too long for your liking before he lets out a loud chuckle and shakes his head “Nah, don’t really feel like it”

Your head falls to his shoulders with a groan “I hope our future children don’t get your shitty eyesight and stubbornness”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A/n: IM BACK AFTER TEN LONG ASS MONTHS GUYSSS.

#tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers #haitani ran imagines #ran haitani #ran haitani x reader #ran x reader #tokyorev headcanons

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b0nten · 25 days

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[SYNOPSIS] ˚⁀➷｡ baking cookies with ran

[NOTES] ˚⁀➷｡ fem reader, rindou guest appearance🤗; requested by anon !! not proofread

“girl, you know damn well we could’ve bou—”

“shut it.”

RAN snaps his mouth shut — as instructed — while his brows raise and eyes widen.

“yes ma’am.” he nods, looking at you expectantly, like he’s a puppy waiting to be rewarded after doing a trick.

he looks around the kitchen, and sighs. if it makes you happy, then he’ll bear the burden of spending the next hour in front of the stove, melting butter and sticky hands from separating eggs.

‘if it makes you happy’ has become his new mantra, at this point.

“come onnnnnnnnnnn!” a whine echoes from the living room, “i’m hun-”

“you go to your room.” you command, and rindou quickly shuffles away, shōchū bottle slipping from his hand and hitting the hardwood floor before he quickly picks it up again; followed by the sound of his door closing.

“now,” you hum, tapping your index against your chin, “preheat the oven at 170°C.” you say, and even though he barely understood half of what you just said, your boyfriend speeds towards the oven and starts turning the buttons, “and when you’re done, separate a yolk from the white, and keep it. then, sift me the flour.”

“am i gonna be doing everything?” ran complains, but quickly quiets down when you give him a glare.

how you managed to tame ran haitani might have to be considered a new wonder of the world, but in all honesty, it’s fun. he — somehow — behaves whenever you’re around, and whenever you need him to. and despite his childish antics, he’s actually quite sweet, especially when he wants to be.

“do you need the larger ones, or the smaller ones?” he asks, inspecting the eggs like he’s never seen one before.

“large, please.” you reply, stirring through your bubbling butter, “do you know how to properly separate them?” you add.

“i’ve seen you do it plenty of times.” he shrugs, and cracks the shell. you absolutely try your best not to laugh while he gags in silence — egg white slipping through his fingers into the sink — recoiling in absolute disgust.

sometimes you wonder how he can beat people bloody but he draws the line at a freaking egg.

against your initial expectations, ran actually does good — everything exactly as you ask him to. he mixes the dough, something he insisted on since he’s “the man of the house”;

(said louder than normal to elicit a ‘whateeeeeeeever’ from rindou)

and you don’t even have to ask him twice to pop the tray into the fridge for the cookie dough to chill. he even offers to put the cookies into the oven, all by himself, like the proud baker he’s become in the span on an hour.

and when you lay your head on his shoulder and say “wake me up in fifteen.”, accompanied by a small yawn, he feels like he’s on cloud nine.

except for the fact that he understands fifty instead of fiteen, so after fourty-five minutes you feel him nudge you gently.

“hey, sweetheart-babycakes-honeybunch?” he pokes your cheek sheepishly.

“hm?” you hum, eyes fluttering open to see him in his apron, gloves on his hands.

“i might have… accidentally..misunderstood you….” he says, “and…. kinda let you sleep for fifty minutes, and the cookies bake for about the same time… haha!” long, bouncy hair sways in front of your face while ran tries his best to look not afraid.

you glare at him.

“they’re still edible…!” he defends his creation, placing a burnt cookie in your mouth.

‘deep breaths.’ you tell yourself, ‘deep breaths.’

“NO THE FUCK THEY’RE NOT!”

looks like rindou’s good for something, too.

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airbendertendou · 2 years

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bonten men reacting to seeing you — their assistant — in your glasses when they’re so used to your contacts.

[ contacts version ]

no pronouns used / gender neutral. lowercase intended. cw ; mikeys poor eating, sanzu + his drug issues, cussing, ran calls reader ‘dolly’, mentions of vertigo

if you have a blank blog [no bio, no user, no header or profile pic, nothing reblogged, etc] do not interact with my content. you will be blocked.

MIKEY ♡

mikey knew you wore contacts. he made sure you always got your yearly eye exam and had the doctor check every possible thing that could be wrong. he wanted you healthy — completely healthy.

what mikey didn’t expect was a package to b on his desk the next morning, your name on the label. he just stared at it for a while, curiosity piquing until it fizzled out as he decided to not snoop through your things.

you stopped by during lunch — you usually did, bringing him actual food instead of snacks — and mikey decided to slide the box your way. “oh, my glasses are here.”

mouth full of food, mikey stopped mid-chew to stare at you blankly. “…glasses?”

“yeah, i decided to order a pair for lazy days,” you nodded. swallowing the food you were chewing, you took a sip of water before shrugging. “they’re better when looking at the computer, too. and i do that all day, so.”

mikey nodded and finished half of his food — only because you told him you were proud of him when he did — and watched you skip to his personal bathroom. he could hear you opening the medicine cabinet doors and cursing to yourself as something slipped from your hands before you joined him once again. but something was different this time — you had frames that were sliding down your nose and your eyes were somehow clearer to see.

“so?” you gave mikey a little twirl as if you’d changed drastically. “do they look okay?”

he stared. mikey’s dark gaze was heavy on you as he just gazed at your glasses before you noticed a small tilt of his lips. “cute.”

it wasn’t much, but it was enough to make a smile pull on your own lips. cute — mikey thought you were cute. ——

SANZU ♡

your head was pounding. you’d fought through it most of the morning and it’d faded a little. come lunch time, though, it came back full force and you were wincing every other minute.

“sanzu probably has some painkillers in his office.” it’s takeomi who speaks up. he’s leaning against the wall across from your desk, frowning as you rub your head. “don’t let him give you anything else, though.”

nodding you stand and wobble your way to where the pink haired boy is. he’s on the couch in his office, drool falling down his chin as he snores. you can’t help but roll your eyes fondly — sanzu was a mess but he was your mess and you adored him helplessly.

“haru,” you shake him gently. letting out a loud snore, he starts to stir. you shake his shoulder again, wincing at the pulsing in your head. “haru, get up.”

with an abrupt snort, sanzu jolts awake and stares at you. blinking slowly, you know he’s still feeling the effects of whatever he’d taken before he passed out. hazy eyes register your presence before a snarl falls on his lips. “who the fuck are you?”

“what.” you stand in disbelief as sanzu finally sits up straight. he’s glaring at you, unfamiliar with who you are. unbelievable man. you wince as your head pounds again. “haru, are you being serious right now?”

he stiffens even more at the sound of his first name. “i asked who the fuck you were.”

“oh my—“ you cut yourself off with a sigh. taking your newly purchased glasses, you slide them up so that your face is bare. “it’s me, you damn jerk. do you have any pain meds? my head is killing me.”

“woah,” haru let’s out a sigh. he’s gazing at you dreamily now that he’s certain of who you are. letting his head fall into the palm of his hand, sanzu tilts his head and grins. “so pretty with your glasses, baby. could barely recognize you.”

“mhm, m’sure it was the glasses and not whatever you took.” you let your glasses fall back into place as you roll your eyes at him. “tylenol? please?”

haru slaps his thighs before standing, slouching over to press a firm kiss to your head before he saunters around his office. as he searches, you can hear him sing “gotta get baby something for a headache”, repeatedly.

handing you the two white pills, you check the imprint code to make sure he handed you the right thing. not that sanzu would accidentally or purposely drug you of all people — he was still reeling from his high, though, and you didn’t trust that his brain was functioning right.

letting out a sigh of relief, you settled your forehead onto his collarbone. haru let his hand fall onto the back of your head, rubbing it occasionally. he kissed the top of your head before settling his nose there. “rest here while it kicks in, hm?”

you could never deny him, no matter how out of his mind he was. ——

RINDOU ♡

rindou always takes you to your doctors appointments. he usually even made his own appointments on the same day so that it as already done. this time, though, something was different.

“what the hell are you wearing?” ran speaks through a snort. rindou sighs at his brothers voice, closing his eyes as he prepares himself for the worst. “haven’t seen you in glasses since we were young, rin rin. you look so cute.”

rindou glares at his brother’s teasing grin, pulling the glasses off of his face and slamming them onto his desk. “shut the fuck up, ran. not cute.”

“but you are! my cute baby brother.”

“rin?” your voice cuts over ran’s. both men look up to see you frowning, your new glasses matching the ones rindou just took off. you looked at the folded frames on his desk, frown deepening. “your glasses?”

“oh, how precious! you’re both matching,” ran laughs. you take it upon yourself to smack the back of his head — gently, but firmly enough so he’d get the message. “okay, okay! i’m done now.”

ran leaves rin’s office soon after and he’s left with your frown pin-pointed to him. you glance from rin to his glasses, and back again when he doesn’t say or do anything. “fine, guess i’ll just put my contacts back in, then.”

his eyes widen at that, watching as you turn and put your nose in the air. frantically, rindou chases you and grasps your wrist tenderly, causing you to turn and face him. your pout causes rindou to soften, letting out a sigh as he reaches behind him to grab his glasses. “sorry, angel. jus’ don’t like when he teases me.”

“i know,” you swing your arm, causing rin’s to swing with it. he smiles at your gesture, sliding his glasses up his nose. “but you promised you’d wear your glasses today. promised we’d match.”

rin sighs and sets his forehead against yours, glasses bumping together and making you both giggle. “a promise is a promise, hm?” ——

RAN ♡

you’re leaning into the wall when he sees you. raising an eyebrow, ran watches you clutch the wall as you walk, knees knocking together as you stumble. he’s following behind you closely, smirk on his face as he holds in his laughter.

“doll? everything okay?” you jump at his voice, pressing your back to the wall. ran lets out a little snicker at your startled expression, gaze softening at the new sight in front of him. tapping the rim of your glasses, ran smiles. “these are new.”

you let out a sigh, body relaxing against the wall. adjusting the frames on your face, you purse your lips at him. “yeah. just gott’em yesterday.”

ran watches you hold onto the wall once more as you walk towards the break room. he finally sees the empty mug you’re carrying — of course you’re off to find a coffee re-fill. you sway to the left a little and ran catches you immediately, arm wrapping around you.

“woah there.” ran frowns at your unstable footing, watching as you try to grip the wall again and fail. “s’goin on?”

putting your back onto the wall again, you face the ground. “jus’ gotta get used to my glasses. makin’ me feel like i’m wearing drunk goggles.”

ran raises an eyebrow at that, smirk pulling on his face once more. griping your waist again, he tugs you away from the wall and helps you stabilize your legs. at his look, you continue speaking. “the floor’s jumpin’ out at me. feels like vertigo and it’s making me nauseous.”

“can’t have my dolly feeling unwell, can we?” ran grabs your empty mug, holding it in his free hand as he motions you to guide your hand against the wall. using ran as a crutch, you finally make it to the break room and ran begins to make your coffee as you sit in a seat. his back is turned to you as he adds in sugar, but he speaks anyways. “as cute as you look, i’d rather you not feel this bad when wearing your glasses.”

you cup the mug as ran sets it in front of you, melting at the warmth it omits. “i’ll get used to it eventually.”

“guess i’ll have to take care of you ‘til then. hm, doll.” ran grins at you, knocking his foot against yours under the table. ——

KOKONOI ♡

“sorry, again, to bother you.” kokonoi is in his car as he talks on the phone. you’re on the other line, still in your pajamas because it was supposed to be your day off. bonten heaquaters would collapse without you, you’re afraid. koko speeds up as he nears the turn for your street, finger hovering above the red end call button that’s on his screen. “see you in a second.”

when you answer the door, kokonoi forgets what he was going to say. his breath catches and his tongue dries out as he just stares. you’re talking but he has no idea what you’re saying — he can’t hear anything over the pounding of his own heartbeat.

tilting your head, the glasses you’re wearing shine in the light and keep his attention even longer. “koko? you can come in, you know.”

“you wear glasses,” he blurts it out. clearing his throat, kokonoi turns his face to the ground as embarrassment colors his cheeks. “i mean— i didn’t know you wore glasses.”

“well, they’re a little impractical in the field.” your attempt of a joke falls flat as kokonoi lifts his head to stare at you again. you adjust the sleeping shirt thats slipping off your shoulder, puffing your cheeks as you widen the door. “inside, koko — you can come in.”

“right,” it’s embarrassingly breathy, how voice sounds. shuffling into your apartment, koko can hear you begin to ramble again as you lead him to the kitchen. there are files spread across your table, a mug right in front of the chair that’s halfway pulled out. kokonoi sits across from you as you talk on.

“��told him that wasn’t what the deal was, but rindou doesn’t listen to anyone but ran. sometimes i don’t even think he listens to mikey and he’s just here because ran is,” you sigh. pushing your glasses up your nose, you slide over the file kokonoi asked for. “this one, right?”

he grabs the folder, reading through the papers as you take a sip from your mug. the steam fogs your glasses and kokonoi can only think of how endearing it looks on you — how attractive he found your specs. “how long have you worn them, your glasses?”

you hum in thought, blowing slightly on your drink. “since i was a kid, honestly. stopped for a little and decided they’d be good to have when my contacts start drying out or hurting my eyes.”

kokonoi nods and glances at the file again before his focus comes back on you. “they look good on you.”

“oh, thanks.” you take a sip of your drink again and notice his stare. raising an eyebrow at him, you tilt your head. “starin’, koko. the office’ll fall down without you there.”

“they’ll be alright a little longer.” kokonoi is sitting beside you and he takes advantage of that, grabbing your chair and dragging you closer. he places a kiss on your neck before moving his head so that he can see your face more clearly. “enjoying the view right now.”

you shove him gently, “cheesy!” there’s a grin on your face, though, and it matches the one koko holds just for you.

—— couldnt think of what to write for the others so sorry abt that ): writing tr characters as hopelessly in love n sappy is a full time job n i take it v seriously. thank you for reading, ♡ airbendertendou © 2022 do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate my content on any platform.

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milkywaydrabbles · 7 months

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Ran would finally take up his brother's offer of just coming with him to meet his 'girlfriend's best friend'. Say some dumb shit about how she'd be good for him, would match his type of crazy. The elder brother rolled his eyes but decided to go out anyways.

Immediately, he found himself drawn to you. How you could command the room with nothing but a stare, features immediately softening when you saw the couple. A hug and kiss later, you're being introduced to Ran, who tried to stay smooth as always, finding himself wanting to be more in your space. You didn't mind.

The music played on, a song about being 'one of the girls tonight' came on, and even though you sang to it you couldn't help but laugh afterwards.

"Funny singing this song, because if I wasn't the only one--the only girl? I'd have a gun to his head." Yeah, you really were his level of crazy.

Ran took the opportunity to hold your jaw, hand much larger than yours covering your throat. "Can I say the same thing then? If we were a thing--if I wasn't your only man, can I have a gun to your head?" His eyes gleamed with excitement, maybe a touch of obsession, seeing your pupils dilate. You breathed out your response:

"Yes, sir."

#haitani ran #ran haitani #ran x reader #haitani ran x reader #ran haitani x reader #tokyo revengers ran #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers hcs #haitani ran imagines #tokrev #tokyo rev #is this something that will turn into more? idk #but ran's that type of crazy #I need him biblically

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petalsofyouth · 4 months

Text

bees that flew away | ran haitani x reader

warnings: drugs usage and alcohol consumption, implied self-harm, unreliable narrator, mentions of a rape (nothing graphic, it's just there), sweet gentle love.

wc: 16 473

author's note: i started writing it on the verge of death and it shows. in the middle of writing it i felt fine and finishing it i was dying once again. oh, and, also! it's a bit unedited. i doubt there are some actual crucial mistakes, but there must be something i overlooked, i'll get to it tmw. so bear in mind that it's unedited. i just wanted to post this, because otherwise i would delay it and delay it and delay it all over again.

_ The room is foggy and you wonder if it’s from five - you counted - lit cigarettes or it’s just your tired drunk brain. It wouldn’t be the first time you conjured something out of nothing. Shaped it in between your fingers and gave it form. Brought it to life.

Your lips quiver and you press them together, averting your red high eyes from you don’t know who. You probably look pitiful and scared because Haruchiyo reaches over and snakes his long arm around your shoulders, hugging you closer to his body. It’s hot in here, but for one reason or another, he is still wearing his favourite old leather jacket. Now, hours into the party, its surface absorbed all the nasty smells of this huge house in Yokohama. It stinks and you gag.

His long bleached hair smells even worse and you gag again. This time closing your mouth with your palm and he looks at you, worry in his hooded eyes.

He should offer you a glass of water and maybe a ride home, you think. If he was a better - maybe normal - friend. But he does neither of that. He takes the joint from his lips and holds it close to your mouth. When you don’t move, just staring at him as if you don’t understand what he wants from you, he sighs and smiles.

Sweetly.

Haruchiyo is a sweet guy. Your best friend.

Deep down the fuckery that he is he is indeed very sweet and kind; pure.

“Come on,” he urges you, tapping on your shoulder. “Relax. Tensing up and thinking won’t do you any good. Be nice. Open your mouth.”

You do just that and when he places a cigarette between your lips you inhale. Toxic green smog invades your lungs and the nausea subsides. Once again you feel light and careless. You feel almost happy. The knocking on the back of your head and in your heart dies. Killed by your own stupid hands. If Rindou were here you suppose he would’ve been very mad at you.

For killing and for not caring. For pretending. “Truth or dare?”

The girl speaks to you and you know that. You feel her stare on yourself and if you weren’t so high you would see the expecting, oh so spiteful, glint in her eyes. If you were sober you would’ve noticed it and probably still would’ve done nothing.

That’s just the way you are.

“Truth.” She licks her glowing with gloss lips and smiles. Her friend, a girl with uneven bangs and the longest hair you’ve ever seen in your life, just beneath her hips, giggles. They share a glance. A knowing one. The trap they settled for you closing with a loud thump.

On the right side, with his arms across the girl's shoulders sits Ran Haitani. She’s almost between his legs, but not quite, and yet there’s a striking familiarity that surrounds them. Maybe it’s in a way his thumb caresses the bare skin of her shoulders or maybe it’s her leaning even more into his broad chest when she catches you watching them.

Either way your hands shake and it might be the alcohol or weed or something entirely else. You don’t bring yourself to care. You simply can’t.

“So,” the girl speaks. Despite the music and the fog around your senses you can hear her clearly. “Is it true that there are burning marks on your upper thigh?” You tense and beside you Haruchiyo tenses too. But the girl continues, “Is it true that you burnt yourself because you hate yourself? Is it true that you always do it high because you are a fucking coward to do it sober?” Your eyes are open and no matter how much you want to close them and squint them hard, you won’t. You stare at the girl as she spews your silly little sins out like they are nothing; like you are nothing. “Is it true that you wanted to fuck Ran, but he said no, because you are..?”

She never finishes her sentence and for the rest of your life you can only guess what insult she had prepared for you.

The table that stood between you falls to the side when Haruchiyo’s Docs comes in contact with it. Ashtrays, bags and glasses scatter on the hardwood floor and you stare at them for quite a time, unable to look at anything or anyone else. The girl screams and her friend screams too and suddenly you aren’t that high anymore and you want to get out of this house, of this party. Out of the sight of all those people. Your body trembles and Haruchiyo, who tightly holds your hand, nudges you to stand up. You do as he asks, because you're tired and because you’ll go anywhere he’ll take you. If Rindou was here, he would’ve hated you not fighting back, but he is not and you are glad there’s one reason less for him to be disappointed in you. “Pathetic fucking excuse of a woman,” Haruchiyo spits at the girl and you tune out, losing yourself in the broken glass on the floor. It’s pretty with myriads of lights - lives - in every broken shard. They are colourful and full of hidden senses you don’t understand.

In the corner of your vision you notice Haruchiyo raising his free hand. The girl screams again and this time when you finally raise your eyes, you see her face and pretty white t-shirt with one of Sanrio characters on it wet with whatever alcohol Haruchiyo had in his cup. A few splashes of it hit Ran’s cheek and arm too, but it’s hard to say what he is thinking. He was never one to betray his mind and show it off to everyone and besides you don’t look at him for too long. The cup and the remnants of a joint goes straight to the floor too. Haruchiyo steps on them and curses again.

“Tame your fucking bitch, Haitani. Next time I won’t see that she’s a woman.” With this you leave. Hand in hand, with bitter hearts, you swim between the people and friends, until you are out of the house, in the fresh air outside. The night that meets you is starry and cold and so it’s very beautiful. Both you and Haruchiyo, stand on the side of the street, near the house in silence, clearly absorbed in surroundings. There’s a black cat watching you across the pavement and somewhere in the bushes is a cicada. Or maybe there are many. You have no way of knowing. The smoke of the cigarette - a regular one - hits your nose and you wonder how in the world have you missed the familiar click of Haruchiyo’s favourite ZIPPO lighter. His older brother gifted it to him when he was barely fifteen. The gift is quite questionable and Haruchiyo is not very sentimental, but he always has it with him. There’s a naked woman engraved on it and he fooled you to believe that’s why. The door behind you sways open, but none of you is interested to know who it is. Maybe it’s no one important. Maybe you both should leave and forget this night like many others. But it’s Kakucho and he gently places his huge brown jacket across your shoulders and so you stay for a little bit longer. His harsh presence cuts the night in two and what happened before suddenly turns into an ugly illusion. The cat yawns and you are reminded of how late it actually is. “True,” you say after the night digs dipper and the smoke of Haruchiyo’s cheap cig envelopes you.

The boys are quiet. Kakucho turns his head to look at you and you smile shyly under his curious gaze. It’s not like anything really matters.

“It’s true. Only I never wanted to fuck Ran. I just wanted to share the love I have for him.” Haruchiyo sighs, dropping unfinished cigarettes onto the pavement. You hope the cat's paws won’t touch it and burn. As it hurts when it burns. Very very much so. “Who the fuck cares if it’s true or not?” “I hate to admit it,” Kakucho sighs pretentiously, a kind smile smudged across his lips, “but I do agree with Haru. Who the fuck cares?” Drops of alcohol on his cheek. Little perfect pearls. Wet black blouse. Cold dead eyes. He doesn’t look at you. He never does. He used to, but not anymore and besides it was so long ago, it’s like it’s never happened. Old images of false memories your brain conjured by itself with a sole reason to feel something; anything at all.

The cat disappears, night swallowing it whole, and you wish it would do the same to you. But beside you two boys bicker so loudly it would never happen. Their voices tie you to them and despite your strong wish to disappear into thin air, you are glad they make you stay. “Do you wanna get going? You are crashing at mine, right?” Haruchiyo asks, stretching out his hand, palm up. You don’t need to think about it, but you still do, taking a little pause before you reply. “Yes. I can’t show up like this at home. Mom’s gonna cry again.” None of these boys know what it means for a mom to cry. And yet they understand the ache and the heartbreak. The sacred prayer to be a better child someone somewhere could be proud of.

Before you part ways, you and Haruchiyo go to find his parked motorcycle and Kakucho his old sporty car he bought with money he probably stole from someone, you shrug Kakucho’s jacket off your shoulders. “No. Take it. You can return it any other time. I don’t mind.” He smiles at you and his smile reaches his eyes.

Haruchiyo’s apartment is small, but it’s only his and that is something to be proud of.

The bathroom is all fogged up from the hot shower you just took. You slip into a pair of clean boxers, old grey sweatshirts and plain white t-shirt. They don’t smell like anything, but they are so undeniably Haruchiyo’, your heart swells. You love your best friend to death.

“I hate the post high,” he murmurs when you sleep under the duvet next to him. “How are you feeling?” “Like shit and worse.”

He giggles, but then he grows serious and his hand slides across the bed. He is searching for your hand, to take it into his and calm you down, to show his love. You help him find it. “Your scars are just scars and she is just a bitch. Don’t think about her.” When you don’t reply, he adds. “I know you do. You are breathing strangely.” And when you don’t say anything else, he speaks again. “I have never spoken about those things with anyone. And I can give my head that Rindou hadn’t either. I don’t know how she knows.”

Those things that are your feelings, your inner world and ugly cracks all over your body.

Those fucking things. Involuntarily, without your mind's consent, you curl into yourself. Cold attacks your limbs like thousands of small invisible needles and you weep, and Haruchiyo understands why and for what. All the reasons are so plain, they are written in black ink on white paper. You hate that you are so easy to crack open. You want to be something else entirely.

“I love you,” he shifts closer to you and soon you are one body, “However you are. Okay?” His long beautiful fingers hold your own hands near his bare chest. He twirls your many many rings and swipes his thumb across your skin. Haruchiyo is a gentle creature and you don’t know where it all went wrong and when sleeping pills in his cupboard became dust to snort up his nose.

“Okay.”

He smiles at that and checks the window behind you. It’s still dark. The dawn - nowhere in sight. Good. So so so good. Before he closes his eyes, he presses his lips against your damp forehead and then under each of your eyes, kissing the tears and headache away. Somehow he manages to do just that and you fall asleep with a light heart. _

Two summers ago, on the warm evening of the last August day, your careless youth slipped away from you.

It’s an irony that it happened when the sun was setting and a small part of you remained forever imprisoned in that pleasant August day, while another you strode forward to some distant place in the night, where you shouldn’t have been at all.

You were wearing a pretty sparkling dress and you were all dolled up and beautiful and yet that wasn’t enough.

With your hands behind you, supporting your body and legs stretched forward, you sat on the porch of the Haitani’s house. The sun had already dipped behind the grey buildings and Roppongi, the heart of nightlife in Tokyo, was just summoned back into existence. Sometimes it felt like during the day this bright area was almost dead, barely breathing, due to the sheer constant of blinding lights it birthed at night.

The all too thoughtfully magazine under your butt did little to protect you from the coldness of the ground. You shivered uncomfortably and gazed at the boy standing in front of you. Ran was always a dream. So handsome. So mature. So perfect with all the hard edges of his character and soft plump of his lips.

So so so so so.

It was embarrassing how in love with him you were and it was more embarrassing, almost devastatingly so, that you fell for him the first day you met him. You still remember how the three of you - Ran, Rindou and you - stood near the vending machine under the metal roof of the small bookshop. It was heavily raining then and you were waiting for the droplets to stop. For the storm to cease and for you to go home. You remember Ran’s beautiful face and you remember how he lit up a cigarette and you remember how his body shivered because he was cold and how he smiled when he caught you staring at him. How he said nothing and how that pretty smile of his never left his face until you closed the door of your home and bid them goodbye.

That day you were supposed to go to a party. Ran was supposed to drive you in his new shiny car and you were supposed to have a good time. Your best friend was already on the train to Roppongi, just one station away and Rindou was still inside the house, torn between white blouse and a grey t-shirt. He didn’t want to appear too casual and yet dressing up never sat right with him.

Maybe if one of them were with you nothing would’ve happened and maybe you would’ve stayed.

But none of them were. Only Ran and his stupid smile that fell off his soft lips the moment you confessed. The frown settled on his face then, and he was silent for a very long time, until he spoke and it became dark.

“You know, I don’t do sloppy seconds. You kinda are my brother’s. It's like… I am sorry. It just won’t work out.”

Once warm air quickly turned dry and you were suffocating. Heart beating too fast and not enough to spread blood across your cold frigid body, you stood up from the porch and without a mere word strode down the road. Ran didn’t say a word. He didn’t go after you. He didn’t call. And if you were to turn back, you would’ve known that he didn’t even look after you as you were slowly disappearing between the building and despair.

The rest of the evening passed in blur. There’s no recollection in your mind of how you ended up in that particular bar and how you spent the little yen you had on you. Till this day, you believe it is your brain that is protecting you from sleazy hands of men across your body, shielding you from the force of pain that overtook you once they had your way with you. You don’t remember much because you were drunk and high, but you remember when Rindou ran into the toilet of that bar and looked away from your abused body splattered on the floor. And you can still hear the sob your friend let out when she saw you. And if you try hard enough you can still feel the love of Rindou’s blouse when your best friend dresses you up in it. Her warm hands on your marked dirty skin.

And of course, you remember the day after, when you woke up in her bed and you both sobbed together, until numbness overtook you and you surrendered to it like a warm hug from the life of your life.

Since that very day, two summers ago, when your little heart was broken and your youth bid you a gruesome farewell, Ran Haitani hadn’t spoken to you at all. It’s like instead of you there was a blank waste of a space and somehow you could understand him. You could justify his silence.

The headache after a hangover is never kind. Mixed with a loud banging on the door and muffled - thanks God - shouts of the Rindou it is truly the worst.

The inner sides of his fists are red, but irritated skin shows barely an ounce of the frustration and anger that bubble in Rindou’s throat. His always so pretty face, now scarred by fury, is what gives him away and by the force with which he kicks off his boots, you can tell he wasn’t trying to ease himself or hide how he is feeling. “What the actual fuck,” he shouts and neither Haruchiyo who stands near the still open door, nor you still in bed under thick blanket can’t tell if this is a question or a statement.

His body rigid and eyes burning an unfriendly fire Rindou throws his bag on the ground near the wooden dinner table that Takeomi brought in Haruchiyo’s apartment - or rather picked it up from the garbage - and strides through the only room to you. “Get up and strip,” he commands and his voice so unnerving, so angry and forceful leaves no space for you to retreat to. You hate when he is doing this, but you understand why and his quivering lips and red dust across his cheeks are enough for you to forgive him. It’s hard for him too.

Loving you and caring for you is hard. But it’s not a new found truth so it’s easy to fathom it in your bones.

You shed clothes that aren’t even yours, easily. One by one they pile up near your legs, a protective shell broken and discharged, until you stand there in your panties and palms for a bra. Haruchiyo curses and averts his gaze. He despises these little checks-up Rindou does and he resents that you are letting him do them every single time. Not once you said “no”.

Smooth hands glide across your skin. Between legs, under your arms, right down the spine. Optical examination ceased to be effective long ago when you put makeup on the newish wound you inflicted upon yourself. Now, Rindou had to be sure. Now, he needed your safety ensured by his own two hands. You wonder if he does all these, because he feels guilty. Because he thinks what happened to you is partially his fault. You had this conversation with him already and it ended in you sobbing and him so angry you were almost afraid of him, but not nearly. Rindou, too, is sweet and kind. Maybe a little bit more so than Haruchiyo.

That’s why you aren’t asking anything anymore. Instead of a question you puff out a little air from between your lips. Rindou’s head shots up and he looks at you, his eyes hidden behind the thin metal rim of his glasses. You suppress a laugh. Something in between his white and blue locks charges you with merriness.

He watches you as you press your lips together and adjust his glasses higher up his nose. He is not amused, you can tell that much, but he isn’t angry anymore and that is a relief. And he let you touch his glasses, something he never allows anyone to do [except you, but not when he is in a bad bad bad mood]. So, you decide, the storm is over. The waves are calm.

“Not even gonna ask what you are laughing about,” he mumbles, inspecting your ankles and when he finds nothing, he stands up from the floor, not before picking up the clothes on the floor.

“Your eyes,” you make a vague gesture with your fingers in front of your own face, “They were just hidden and you looked so… I don’t know… Never mind, Rin.” In front of you in the kitchen fighting with a kettle Haruchiyo snorts. There’s a herbish aroma and something almost too sweet circulating in the air and it’s so strong it startles you. Too absorbed in Rindou you didn’t notice the smell before. Another Haruchiyo’s tea concoction. Hopefully, this time successful.

“Did you two get high yesterday?” Rindou asks, going inside the kitchen - it’s hard to tell where the bedroom ends and kitchen starts since Haruchiyo’s apartment is a studio - and peeking over Haruchiyo’s shoulder. “You laugh even more in the post-haze than you do while you are at it.” The silence that settles is murmuring all the nasty things that happened yesterday right in Rindou’s ears. He looks between the two of you exchanging glances and sighs.

“Whatever. Honestly, I am not even interested. I am here this early only because your mom called.” At this, you stop, your sweatpants half way your legs. You would’ve called Rindou out for lying, because he is here not only because of your mother’s call, but because he simply can not stop caring for you. But then, when your parent calls Rindou it’s never a good thing. It’s always about your scars, your secrets and your lies.

This time, however, you know why she called him and you sit down on the bed, feeling like the smallest tiniest human being in the whole world. You hate this feeling of a deep humiliation. You want to burn yourself to not remember the ache in your tightened jaw and the disgusting sweat on your clammy palms.

“If this is about the blades under my bed I didn’t buy them to… har… cut myself. I bought them for postcards.”

He doesn’t buy it. He bites his lip and shakes his head, waiting for you to continue. “I am telling the truth, Rindou. I bought them to cut out postcards. I… I…” Hot tears pool in your eyes and you hate that he doesn’t believe you and you so badly want to pity yourself, but you can’t. Can’t do this. Because it’s your own fault no one trusts your words and promises anymore. When they look at you and pity you it’s done by your own hands. Hands you too want to burn.

“Oh, baby, stop,” Haruchiyo helps you pull your sweatpants up and then he ties the drawstrings for you, his body - a shield between you and Rindou, “you didn’t cut yourself with those blades, did you?” “No, I swear, I didn’t,” you repeat it a few times and the only thing that makes you stop mumbling is the pain that seeps through Haruchiyo’s eyes into your heart.

“Well, good to hear, but you will have to buy a pair of scissors for your postcards, because I threw away those blades you hid under your bed.”

A clammy hands of desperation tighten around your neck and you want to scream. From frustration and from anger, from despair. Was it like this back too? Your every word carefully weighed and put on the pedestal to judge? You don’t think so. For better or for worse you can’t remember how it was before, but you wonder when everyone will just give up on you.

With a loud screech against the chair against the floor, Rindou stands up. He takes a few steps and gently shoves Haruchiyo away from you. His long white hair swaying in the air. Haruchiyo smiles at you, reassuringly, kindly and the pools of grim pain evaporate from his beautiful eyes. Love heals, you think. So then, why do you remain sick? “You know how much I care about you, do you?” Rindou asks, cupping your face, his thumbs stroking your cheeks. “I’ll do anything for you to be healthy, happy and well. If it means I have to be harsh with you then I will. And if it means you will hate me somewhere on the way, so be it. But I won’t let you down again. Get this in your head. I. Am. Not. Letting. You. Down. Ever. Again.” Haruchiyo turns away and gets to his kettle and tea. And you finally silently cry cradled into Rindou’s warmth. Humiliation washes away with salty tears and the ever so heavy guilt crashes upon your shoulders. It’s better than anything, you think. Because that means you still care too and that means you are alive and well and there’s hope that one day all the check-ups and blades and tears will be in the past.

You believe in this.

Haruchiyo’s tea turns out not so bad and you and Rindou have two cups, one and half each.

That day you come home late in the evening.

You still wear Haruchiyo’s clothes and have Kakucho’s jacket thrown over your shoulders. The sneakers you place on the shoe rack - dusty black Adidas - are yours. This random sudden thought makes you happy and for the first time in a while you bubble with excitement. Over shoes. It can’t be normal. It’s not normal. Probably just a lingering side-effect of weed or bottled up emotions in which Rindou effectively made a hole once again. Inside the living room, under tonkatsu, sits your family. They are watching TV over dinner. You see an empty plate and an empty space reserved just for you and your giddy happiness holts. You had dinner with Rindou and Haru already and you aren’t hungry. Guiltiness spreads across your lungs like a web of poisonous spiders.

Your mother is the one who sees you first. She is wary and tired when she looks at you, but this is nothing new. Your father turns back to look at you too, he nods and returns to the TV as soon as he can. He says, you should join them and eat something, you must be starving. You nod and wave at your little sister. She waves back.

You go inside your room.

No one said anything about new shining scissors you had in your hand that Rindou bought for you.

No one came to check on you and you didn’t have dinner together.

_ You skip school for the next few days.

There’s no particular reason. You just don’t feel like going.

In front of you, there’s a void and it’s luring you in. Black colour, so inviting and beautiful. Inside of a space avoidant of anything and everything, where no air is floating, you are blossoming. The slightest aroma of laundry detergent and fresh baked cookies are so hard to resist and this is exactly what this imaginary [not so] place of yours smells like. You wish you could stay there forever.

You almost do.

But then your phone rings and the number is unknown. Yet, you have the slightest hunch of who it could be. That’s why you pick it up.

“Hey! You have no idea how hard it was to get your number. You do have some seriously overprotective friends,” Kakucho laughs echoes through that night where you met a black cat to now and then right into your ear.

You hum, holding your phone in the safest place between your ear and shoulder, “I guess you could say that. Why are you calling? Oh! I am sorry I totally forgot to give you your jacket back. Do you wanna meet up somewhere? I am free now.”

He laughs again and you notice that his laugh is boisterous and contagious. It’s almost childish in its raw sincerity. You haven’t heard people being that happy in a long long time. In a reminiscence the corner of your lips stretch up on their own. “What about… Can you be at Shibuya station in twenty minutes?” “I can try.” “Cool. I'll see you there then!”

He hangs up just as abruptly as he called and the taste in your mouth is not of sweet abyss cookies, but of metal and caramel. It’s exciting in the most lazy manner.

Outside, running down the street, to catch the bus on time, you notice the vast blue sky that is so clear it looks like it’s made of glass. You stop on the crossroad, hands on your hips, and take a few shallow breaths. Running was never and will never be your forte, but you stare at the infinite beauty that covers the whole earth and all people living on it, and wonder why haven’t you got out of the house earlier.

_ Kakucho takes you to a nice barbeque place.

It’s a chain restaurant, so the food is quite cheap and nice. You order two bowls of rice, beef, soup and kimchi. Kakucho gets himself Sapporo beer and you ask for iced lemon tea which he claims doesn’t go well with meat, but still smiles when you sip it.

He is sitting opposite you in a small booth made for two people only. He is wearing a black turtleneck and plain jeans that can’t be that expensive, but they do look like he paid more than twenty thousand yen to get them. On the back of his chair hangs yet another leather jacket. The one he gave you sits in the Mitsukoshi bag under the table near your leg.

In everything he does, Kakucho is effortless and confident. He grills the meat for you and he carries the conversation for you too. He asks you about school, about your hobbies, your likes and dislikes and even learns what your favourite colour is.

Half through this spontaneous dinner you understand that this was never about returning his jacket. At least for him. But then, it’s his dark black hair that he spontaneously decided to grow out almost two years ago after he got tired of seeing that ugly bald dude with a scar in reflection every morning. [This you too learn over the food and while you want to tell him that by no means he can be considered ugly, you suppress yourself and listen to his soothing voice carrying you to yet another story already.] They are so black, they almost have this blue-ish inky feeling to them. And somehow looking at him so smiley, so kind and so handsome, so welcoming and accepting, so invested in every few words you say, he reminds you of those beautiful warm summer nights. Not the one that happened two summers ago, but all the ones before that. It’s a burning sensation and it calms you.

You think, if he wants you might give him a chance.

It’s dark when you go outside and back to the metro station.

“Next time I’ll see you I’ll bring my car. I feel really bad, but my car is in the service. The engine has been acting up.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Kakucho,” you say counting the colourful kaleidoscope of the stained glass window of the random shop, you pass by. You connect every piece to seconds that fly away and they make beautiful constellations. “Just think it’s a good thing you are taking me home then and we are going by foot and not driving there. I am bad with directions. But now you are going to remember where I live and next time you can pick me up right from home. You know, just to pay for all the walking we did today.” He bites his smile back, lips pressed tightly together, but it fights him and reaches his eyes. They shine. _ “Since when are you and Kakucho going out?”

You sit on the floor of Haruchiyo’s apartments with a scissor in your hands. Bright patterned paper, stickers, glue and so many other things you sure are two boys in the room with you don’t even know the name of, lay in a circle surrounding you. It’s messy, but Haruchiyo who lays on the bed, behind you and watches every single creative step you take, doesn’t seem to mind.

In fact he never does.

“We are not going out,” you mumble, eyes focused on cutting the most precisely shaped heart without an outline. “We’ve been hanging out. That’s all.” Rindou doesn’t seem to be convinced. He glances over to Haruchiyo laying on his stomach, blond hair a curtain, and sighs.

“You do know, he has a thing for you?” “Well, I mean I kinda do, but I am sure it’s not anything serious. Who would’ve been in lo…” “He punched Ran at that party and they haven't talked since then.”

The scissors stop and the bright yellow heart falls to the ground. It’s nicely and evenly cut out, but something about it isn’t right and you can’t tell what it is and you are spiralling and nothing can stop you now, because fire is nowhere in reach. You scratch your left thigh.

“I didn’t wanna tell you, but…” “I am glad Kaku did it. I am sorry Rin, but it was actually very nasty there and if not for her, I would’ve killed his bitch first and then kill him,” you hear the springs in the old mattress squeak and then Haruchiyo plops right next to you, making a space for himself between glue bottles, colourful tapes and you. “Ran never told her anything, because he didn’t even know, and I never told Ran or anybody about it. It wasn’t my brother’s fault she ran her mouth. For all I know Ran and her were never even together.” “Oh, really? Then how the fuck does she know?” The anger rising up in Rindou scorches you and you wince, but boys being boys, playing their own little war don’t notice it. “How would I know that? I just know that even if Ran knew he would never speak about it with anybody else!” “For fuck’s sake, Rindou, I know he is your older brother and you always admired him and…”

The words bleed. The wounds they leave suffocate. You plaster a yellow heart over a red cardboard. You draw millions of hearts around it. You wish they’d stop now, but you know them both well enough, to know they won’t. You know how much Rindou loves Ran and how much Haruchiyo thinks everything that happened to you is because of Ran. But it’s not. What happened to you has never been Ran’s fault and you won’t let anyone think that. Not even your sweet pretty Haruchiyo. “I believe it,” you say loudly enough to stop them. “In fact, I know it wasn’t Ran who told her. Ran is not like that and… I… I just know he didn’t know about it. It wasn’t him. It wasn’t Ran and it’s not his fault. Neither it’s his responsibility or yours.” Splashes of alcohol across his cheek and wet t-shirt. The look on his face. Of pure horror and so many regrets. It wasn’t Ran. It could never be him.

Rindou and Haruchiyo mend over the sweet sour chicken you make for them. They laugh, and joke and make those stupid boyish remarks only male in their twenties can. But you forgive them for that and for everything else too, like they do the same for you.

It’s when Rindou examines your newest red card with yellow heart and I LOVE YOU RINDOU written across it, he brings the subject of Kakucho back. “Just so you know, I won’t hesitate to add another scar to his face.” Haruchiyo snorts, “Aren’t you two like best gym buddies?” “Yes we are. But he doesn’t make me postcards. And want it or not, but my loyalty lies with my brother so we aren’t speaking either.”

Haruchiyo never comments anything on it and neither do you, but for the rest of the evening and well into the night when you lay down in Haruchiyo bed and try your best to sleep, you can’t help it, but think where does your loyalty lay? To what latitude does it extend and what seconds are most important to you to get back to them over and over again. _

It’s summer and you are in Kyoto. You are in your last school year and life has never ever been more beautiful. The green around you has the most vibrant colour and the sun above you is the warmest it has ever been. You close your eyes, spread your arms and melt. If you had to choose a moment to live in forever it would be this.

There’s a festival going on in town. You hear music and people laughing. You smell chicken and something very very sweet. But despite this cacophony of smells and sounds, you also hear birds chirping and because of that your heart beats twice as fast. It’s a pretty feeling and you hope your heart will stay this way forever.

Ran finds you kneeling in front of the small flower cart in front of the flower shop. You are so engrossed in the scenery of random shapes and ethereal feelings to them, you don’t notice him at all. Or so he thinks, because it’s very very difficult for you not to sense Ran’s presence.

It’s even harder not to feel his lazy stare on you and it’s impossible to not be burned by his crooked hazy smile as he watches you pecking tender petals with your fingertips.

“Where’s Rin?” You ask, eyes focused on the bright pink flower. Ran takes a step, then another one and then he squats by your side, shoulders touching, the flower unnoticed. “With Kakucho, your two friends and Haruchiyo at a sportswear store.” “What?” Head snapping to the side, you study his face, to see if he is teasing you and while his lips are stretched in a smile, you don’t think he is.

“I know. I am surprised Haruchiyo tagged along with them,” he stops talking, his lips form a straight concerned line and the crease between his blonde eyebrows makes you want to press a fingertip in there to soothe it.

But instead of you reaching out to him, it’s him raising his hand to your shoulder. You hear a little buzzling near your ear, see the blue vast sky and people swarming behind Ran and you feel so warm, so safe, so i-wanna-freeze-this-moment. And you don’t know why your heart clenches the way it does and why your hands get clammy.

“It’s a little bee,” Ran says, eyes fascinated by the small creature sitting on his finger. “Probably mistook you for a flower.” He laughs and shakes the bee away. It falls in the air, but as if remembering it can actually fly, spreads its little tiny wings and goes off. To the crowd. To the festival. To so many shared happy moments.

“Do you want to go eat something? I am starving and on my way here I saw a decent looking place that serves yukke.” “Can we get Yatsuhashi after?” you stand up first, your head a bit dizzy from squatting for so long. Ran grins and nods, “Anything you want.” It’s on the way to the more than decent looking, but high-class restaurant that Ran takes you to, in the middle of your conversation that you remember about the flowers you were so fascinated with. There was no tag on them and you weren't sure they were even for sale, and yet you wished you went inside the shop and asked. Everything needs a name to stay. Today, Ran is eager to provide you with one. “It’s camellia. The flower you were looking at. Did you like it?”

The sun is still high up in the sky and people are still walking. The Gion Matsuri festival will last for another three days. “Since when can you tell flowers?”

You are genuinely interested and maybe that’s why Ran responds. You are sure he wouldn’t otherwise.

“Mom used to have a book on flowers. Encyclopaedia. Was obsessed with them and how do you think she came up with the name for me and Rin? Obviously took them from there. It was the only thing that remained after she left. Along with our names.”

“Well, you and Rindou remained too and then that old apartment of yours.” The smile blooms on his face again. He points at the restaurant with his finger and leads you there, “That apartment was actually of our beloved father. I wanted to set it on fire, but Rin talked me out of it.”

Somehow you know once again he is telling you the truth. The fire, him and Rindou, and the book that for one reason or so many more others he kept and read so many times, he could tell camellia apart from other flowers.

“Anyway, do you think bees migrate?” Inside the restaurant almost all tables are busy, but Ran finds you a perfect place near the outdoor garden for two people. You get a haunting feeling like it was waiting for you. “You mean migrate like birds do?” “Yeah,” he says casually overlooking the menu, “Oh, they have your favourite iced lemon tea. I always thought it’s amusing how you never drink anything hot.”

“I don’t like hot things. They burn. I hate it when it burns,” you do and you don’t think you’ll ever change. “And to answer your question, I don’t think bees migrate. I’ve never seen them flying around freely like birds.” “I’ve never seen a single bee in Roppongi. Today's gotta be my first time.” You end up ordering a lot more than you both can eat. It’s always like this with Ran and you think you know why. You think you understand him, and his questions and a lot more things he tries to keep confined in that heart of his.

Like an encyclopaedia of flowers and bees that flew away.

_ You and Kakucho will never end up together. Not in this universe, not in any other. He is the first one to break it to you, but you were the first to realise.

The truth is swallowed under bright cold stars. There’s not much light on the pier where you are lying down on the cold grey cement, but the roar of crashing waves and flickering lights of bulk carriers’ lamps are enough to guide you home. If needed.

“I feel like I could love you, but you won’t let me,” he says and these words are mere whispers that take the form of a knife. Dull or sharp doesn’t matter. It still cuts your skin in two and you bleed. This is nothing new.

“Maybe you are right,” is all you say. Your hands on your belly, you imagine sharks, three of them, emerging from the water and ripping you apart. They have five rows of deadly sinful teeth that will shred your flesh in seconds before you become part of them and the sea. You won’t die and you’d feel pain until sun blasts and the Earth will pause to exist and you with it. But no sharks come out and you are breathing.

“I still want to be your best friend, though,” Kakucho turns to his side, prompts his head on his palm and peers in your face. “If you want to, of course.”

Under his gaze, you think he’s searching for something. You want to tell him not to, because he won’t find it there. There’s no fight left in you. It’s all in vain, all in vain! “Nah. Those roles are taken,” you are only half-joking, but he doesn’t have to know that. “You can try though.” “Oh, I will. I will try my very best. I still like you. It’s not like it will go away any time soon.” If sharks do come, you pray, please don’t kill Kakucho too. He deserves to live a long nice life with a person who will love his gentle soul. But again, no sharks come, and you and him are alive and well. And an hour later he drops you off at home and you wish you won’t see him again and regret your inability to make people feel love. _ Haruchiyo’s hair is the prettiest you’ve ever seen. You’ve known him since you were eleven and every single hairstyle he had he owned. He was a young cheerful boy then, and a quite pretty young man now. Sometimes, you wished you could be together. You think both of you could make it work and maybe both of you would, if there wasn’t Rindou in between of you. But, today, there’s no Rindou and Haruchiyo’s head is in your laps and his clear bright eyes, almost transparent in their intensity, look at you and you only.

“What are you thinking about?” He asks, hand finding yours, fingers sewn together. “Nothing much,” you lie and he accepts it, because he knows what goes in your head.

He sighs then, a tired loud sigh ripped right from his chest, just where his heart is. He tears himself off you, and sits opposite you, stretching his legs on each side of you.

“If you want, we can, but I do agree with Kaku, you will never love anyone, even me, like you love that beanpole. And hurting me will break your heart more than… Ah, you understand what I mean, right? And sex won’t solve anything either. It’s gonna make everything worse. And I am willing to give up anything I might feel for us, but not you and what we already have. I love you and I love your happiness and it’s not with me. Not in that way.” “Wow,” you giggle, face hot with tears. Haruchiyo smiles. His kind, beautiful smile makes him even more ethereal than he already is. With this angel white hair.

He leans in and kisses you on your lips. Hands on your wet cheeks, he doesn’t wipe them away, but hold them there and you feel them. They are cold and sorrowful. They are happy.

“Let’s go eat something. I’m paying. And if you want we can rent a movie to watch before we come back.” I do, you say and he nods. He kisses your forehead and helps you stand up. Haruchiyo is your best friend and you don’t really suppose you are destined to become something else. And it’s good. It does feel right.

_ The school is somehow not how you remember it. It’s even more dull, grey and ugly. You so badly want to drop out and never come back, but you can’t disappoint your family and friends more than you already have. You suck all your regrets and unpleasantries in, and continue to carry on.

Today, you are all alone. Haruchiyo isn’t in Tokyo and neither is Rindou. They went to that stupid DJ convention in Osaka and you, sitting in the cafeteria with your store bento box in front of you, wish you were with them. They are for sure having a lot of fun.

Unlike you.

It’s not a recent thing, but you are craving company, because thoughts inside your head are suffocating you. You see fires, fireworks and sharks with fairy lights. You feel waves and your little sister stares at you. Your skin pops off, wrinkling and coming off in ugly distorted layers.

You need this to stop, until you do the unforgivable and this is betraying Rindou to whom you promised not to do anything with yourself. You promised to go to school and study and be a good girl. Just for this week. Until he comes back and it gets easier to breathe.

Maybe, you should call Kakucho and go out with him. He won’t say no. You know that well and that’s why you don’t call him. He is too good for you and your haunting voices in your mind.

Everything seals in, when your friend finds you in the cafeteria and invites you to the party. It’s a small intimate gathering she promises and it’s gonna be so fun! We can dress up and have a little fun. We haven’t hung out in so long. Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go! We are going to have the best night ever.

You don’t think twice, you need to relax and shut your shaking fears in your head, lock them away and preferably kill. So, you say “yes” and it makes your friend so happy, she spills her orange juice on your bleached jeans that your mother washed yesterday. _

The party is awful and your heart screams at you to get out before it’s too late.

But your friend holds your hand and you feel safer and she claims she knows a lot of people there and they are nice and then, she would never let anything happen to you. The last part is true, but there’s only so much a young girl in her twenties can do. People she knows are a group of men. They look like rock stars, smudged eyeliner and long hair, multiple piercings in both ears. There’s no way to tell their age, but you don’t think they are that much older. A strong smell of weed and alcohol doesn’t scare you either. It feels familiar.

With a few drags from a blunt you levitate, head in clouds, river of shitty bitter drink in your stomach, you levitate. You laugh and giggle and let the boy with orange bleached hair throw an arm around your bare shoulders. His touch isn’t anything, it’s barely there.

Until it’s not.

Until, his hand slides to your breast and he squeezes it. Once, twice, you lose the count. You feel sick, smoke disintegrated from your head, alcohol still in your blood. All the scars you carry on your body itch. You breathe in and breathe out, and the boy mistakes it for excitement. He grins, eyes foggy and greedy.

The bile rises up in your throat. You shove it down, to your stomach. The friend that promised to be there for you isn’t here anymore and you can’t pinpoint the moment she left. Hazy thoughts and remnants of what she said to you before going upstairs with one of the boys are still there, but they are melted in the hold and attention forced on you.

When the boy turns you around and kisses your neck, you’ve had enough. With a smile on your lips, and wobbly legs, you push him away, hands on his chest and he groans unsatisfied and hungry. He dives right back, fingers latching onto your waist. “I really need to use the restroom,” you whisper again and again and again. “I really need to. Please. I’ll be back. Just let me go.” He doesn’t and his friends laugh behind you. Is there no one to help you? No one to not let that awful night happen again? “Please, I just want to go to the restroom,” you plead and this time he releases you. You flee away. With trembling hands and shaking heart, you flee away and run to the bathroom. It’s vacant and it’s dirty, but it will do. It will do until you think of how to escape that party and get home. To your mom, to your dad and to you sweet little sister. To everything good and innocent that still lives in you. But now, you cry. You sit on the dirty floor in the house of a person you don’t know with a dress ridden to your mid thighs and cry. You cry for betraying Rindou’s trust, because once you are out of here, you’ll cut and then you’ll burn yourself and this time you hope it hurts so much, you won’t be able to feel anything for weeks. You hope it scars your body so ugly everyone will finally turn away from you. But firstly, you need to get out of here and this is almost impossible, because that guy wants you and waits for you and you promised to be back. Swallowing, you reach out for your phone. It’s in your bag. It’s fully charged and when you are about to dial Kakucho’s number, because he’s the only person to come and get you now, it rings. You answer before you see the name of the caller. “Hey! Why weren’t you answering my calls? Where the fuck are you?”

It’s Rindou and you know everything ends here. “I am fine. I am just at the party with…” “Are you crying? What the fuck? Where are you?” You sob. Because he is harsh with you and because he has every right to be.

“Rin, I am sorry, I… that guy… I don’t want you to worry about it. I’ll call Kakucho and he…” “Who? Did someone hurt you? You need to tell me where the fuck you are.” “He just… Rin, I can’t… Why are you in… I am sorry… I want to go home.” He is panicking. On the line, in another city, his heart breaks in two for you. “I need you to tell me where you are. Tell me where the fuck you are.” You tell him. The address, the way to the bathroom and even what you are wearing. You have no idea why you are doing this, because Rindou is no god and he can’t get to Tokyo, to you, swiftly. Today, he won’t save you. But he promises you he will and then he hangs up, only to call you a couple of minutes later and talk to you about anything and everything, before you are safe. Before you are you again. _ The lightning that shoots through your body is so strong and powerful, you straighten up against the door and stop breathing. Outside is eerily quiet. The music is no longer playing and people aren’t speaking. It’s like the world died and you are the only one left. “What is it?” Rindou asks after he catches you not listening to him telling you about the new DJ set up he and Haruchiyo saw today at the exhibition. It’s pointless asking him, because you do know the answer to your question, but you do ask anyway. “Who did you call, Rindou?” “Ran. I called Ran. Is he there?”

His voice is soft and comforting, but it does little to calm your wires of nerves. Suddenly the world is very crispy and clear. “Rin, I don’t think I am ready to talk to him and…” “Listen here,” he interrupts you, taking a long pause, “It’s just Ran. My older brother. The guy you knew since what? Five years old? I don’t know a better person I can trust you with than him.” “It’s not that… it’s just… I am not ready… I don’t think…” A knock on the door never lets you finish the sentence. Rindou is babbling up on the phone again, you can hear him, but you can’t comprehend what he is saying. Slowly you open the door. You feel safe. You start breathing again. _ Ran doesn’t take you to your house. He doesn’t speak to you when he escorts you out of the house, your hand in his, and he doesn’t speak to you once he stops near KFC, gets out and gets back with two large bags he throws in the backseat, neither does he say anything when he makes the last stop at convenience store two blocks away from his and Rindou’s apartment.

Two stops and thirty minutes ride, you don’t hear his voice even once. I am with her, is what he said to Rindou when he found you and took your phone from your hands; it still sits in the right pocket of his sweats.

And you, you don’t try to talk either. Instead, you watch him. You caress his face with your eyes and try to spot if everything is different since you last saw him this close. Two summers ago.

You don’t find anything new and it’s disappointing and relieving at the same time. Inside the apartment everything is still. He flickers on the light in the living room, places bags with food and drinks on the table and turns to you, standing where he left you. In the corridor. “Go and take a bath. Puke if you want and then come here. We’ll eat and we’ll talk.” When you don’t move he adds. “Go and wash yourself, I’ll bring you fresh clothes in a minute. Go.” The shower does help you. Water and soap feel nice on your skin and it’s not the cleansing you wish it was, but it still makes you feel better. Less anxious and more grounded. It also washes your worries away and you can’t help, but blame it on the weed wearing off your body. You are happy you are sober now and you wish it was something else that sobered you and not a random guy groping you at the party you shouldn’t have been at, at all. You don’t puke and you rinse your mouth with green mouth wash that you find on the sink. Haruchiyo has the same one at his apartment. You think if he is already aware of what happened. You should call him tomorrow and say you are okay, you are fine. Nothing bad happened. You suppose Rindou has told him, but you want to reassure him yourself. Ran sits on the floor when you emerge from the bathroom, wearing black sweats and grey t-shirt. You know it’s his clothes and you know when he raises his head and sees you wearing them, the corner of his lips tug up. He is quick to lower his head again, eyes on the chicken and fries neatly divided between two plates, as he motions you to come join him.

This time you do it without hesitation. You eat in silence. Words on the tip of your tongue you so desperately want to say something, but it’s not your turn to talk and so you wait, until he gathers up and says what he has to say to you. “You are staying here. I already called your mom and told her you are with me so you don’t have to worry about it. I also spoke with Rindou and he’ll stay at the convention until the end. He won’t return tomorrow as he initially wanted.” You don’t say anything back. The fast food Ran bought is delicious and this apartment with him in it is a pleasant nice memory you dissolve in. You sip on your beloved iced lemon tea and you hope this moment of the night will never end or it will snatch you away. Imprison you in its comfort. “How do you feel?” His purple eyes never leave your presence and while the question is expected, you never wanted him to ask you that, because for once you don’t want to lie anymore. You are sick and tired of lying. “I am fine now, but I don’t think I’ll be tomorrow morning when I leave and I’ll probably get worse when I am home and alone.” He hums to that, shaking his head. His hair is parted in two nicely done braids. It’s longer than you remember it and yet it’s the same. “You won’t go home tomorrow morning. You are staying here until the answer to that question is I am good. Until I see you are better I am not letting you go.”

“Ran, I don’t think it works like that.” “Then, we’ll make it work like that.”

That puts an end to your conversation. Together you wash dishes and he returns to his room, while you slip in Rindou’s bed and close your eyes. Violence is never an answer to you, and maybe Ran didn’t mean to enforce anything on you, and that’s why he didn’t close the door to his room as he always did before [you remember it so, but he might have changed, it’s been years after all], but you want to try. You so desperately want to feel good, you are willing to do anything. _ The next morning comes and you are the first to wake up. Ran’s room is dark and silent. The door is still open. There’s no sound coming out. Everything is still and motionless, but alive. That’s how you know he is actually home, inside his room sleeping peacefully.

You don’t move around much. You don’t want to wake him up, because you do remember how grumpy he gets when someone disturbs his sleep. So, instead, you return back to Rindou’s bedroom and lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling. Your phone is still in Ran’s possession and you are quite bored. Not that you can do much with it, but you could have messaged Rindou or Haruchiyo. It’s better than doing anything and in Rindou’s bedroom there’s nothing much to shorten the time you have until Ran wakes up.

It’s around noon when your back gets so stiff and you just simply can’t fall asleep again no matter how hard you try, so you get off the bed and stride into the kitchen. The cupboards don’t have much and it’s even worse than at Haruchiyo’s house. That boy at least has a collection of tea, instant coffees, chicken take-outs leftovers and rice. All Haitanis have are a pack of rice, one cup of instant noodles, a carrot, two cans of spam and five eggs. It’s all definitely courtesy of Rindou. Ran solely survives on deliveries and eating in those favourite posh restaurants of his.

It’s another hour and a smell of grilled spam that lures him out of the bed. He crosses the corner that separates his bedroom and kitchen, and with a heavy blanket across his shoulder and droopy eyes that are ready to close any second, stares at you. “What are you cooking?”

“Rice with spam and eggs.” “I didn’t know we had eggs. Good. I’ll be right back.”

He disappears into his room and then reappears a second after and goes straight into the bathroom and you standing in their little kitchen for the first time since yesterday shrink in size, feeling very very small. It’s all too strange, you comprehend, mind spiralling and angry and so frustrated. So so so strange for you to be here, in Ran’s and Rindou’s kitchen, cooking a miserable attempt at breakfast at noon, for yourself and a guy with whom you once were so close, but then you haven’t spoken in almost two years and now…

You freeze, hands raised mid-air, and mouth slightly parted. Breathing in and out. In and out. In and out.

Now… Now, there’s rice on the stove and you need to reach for bowls, which should be in the cupboard right in front of you. That’s if they didn’t wake up one day and decided to store their dishes in the drawer next to the fridge.

Now, you need to turn the stove off, so the spam will stay crispy, and not turn into an ugly tasteless black coal. You need to do all this and that’s what you do. Ran is back to you in almost no time. He watches you carefully, and you wonder if he sees your worries in your trembling hands and bitten lips, in how you avoid his intense gaze. But if he does, he doesn’t say anything. Wordlessly, he helps you by taking both of the bowls, leaving you to grab chopsticks and soya sauce.

He settles on the floor and you sit next to him, putting a comfortable distance between the two of you.

It’s very Ran to not turn on the TV. He eats quietly, throwing a small praise your way, that means nothing, because it’s just an appreciative humming and a couple of pleased curses. You eat too, because there’s nothing else to do and you are kinda hungry. It’s also is a distraction enough not to send you down your torture tunnel again. You welcome it happily, grabbing the opportunity with both hands. You welcome Ran staring at you too. You suppose you are acting as the TV for him today. The thought makes you smile. “Yesterday, when I arrived, no one would tell me who was the guy that made you uncomfortable by touching you,” he starts, confident with purple eyes never leaving you. “They only spoke when I kneeled one of them down and stepped on their fingers.” The rice in front of you, sticky from the yolk, dances. You wish you could dance too, but you haven’t had a good dance since the last party with Haruchiyo and Rindou almost two weeks ago, where Rindou got so drunk, he couldn’t remember what his name was, but he remembered you. That moment was sweet and you think the moment now isn't really so, but your mouth suddenly tastes like cotton candy and it’s a pleasant feeling. A great even.

“I broke the fingers of the guy who touched you yesterday and I broke every single finger on the hands of the guys who touched you that day. It was a mess, but there won’t be a day now in their lives, that they won’t feel the pain and that’s all I wish for.” “Ran…” The bowl is too heavy for you to hold and the rice isn’t dancing anymore, nor does the world move and you doubt anything exists past this apartment. The white noise and deafening eerie silence envelope you in their deadly hug. But you don’t want them to touch you. You want to swim in Ran’s eyes that carry no remorse or guilt or pity, but acceptance and comfort. Tenderness seeps through him like the sand of the broken hourglass. If he suffocates you with it, burying you under him, you won’t mind it.

You won’t mind it at all. “You don’t have to say anything,” he laughs, clearly amused by your lack of reaction or from the plentiness of it. “Good.” “Yeah, good. Finish your food and let’s go grocery shopping. We don’t have anything to eat in this house and Rindou’s stack of shochu isn’t much to my taste.” “He still has a stack of shochu?” “That’s the only thing you are worrying about?” “No, but…” “I am teasing you. Yes, he has. It’s in the cupboard next to the fridge.” Well, it seems like nothing much changed in their apartment after all. Bowls in the cupboards and stacks of shochu, and everything else in between.

Two years after last visiting, you feel like it was just yesterday. A nice revived warm memory. You hope it will linger for a little more, its light pleasantly warming your cold hands. _ Your phone is somewhere inside Ran’s room and he isn’t willing to give it to you. It’s also a no trespasse territory so you don’t dare to go in there and take it yourself. “Did Rindou call?” You ask on your second day spent with Ran. It’s raining outside. Quite heavily so, but inside this little cute cafe that serves only coffees and cheesecakes, it’s warm and safe. “He called me,” Ran says, cutting his lemon cheesecake in half and transferring the piece to your plate. He cuts off part of your strawberry one for himself too. “Asked what we were doing and how are you doing. Don’t worry about him. He is getting drunk, high and probably has a couple of girls in his bed to warm it. I bet he is having a good time.”

“It’s good then. I want him to have a good time.” Ran hums, takes a sip of his black coffee that obviously doesn’t taste good at all and observes you. Eyes squinting and all. It would’ve been uncomfortable before, but it’s not anymore. In these two full days you spent with him in his apartment it’s almost like all those years before. “Your other friend called though and sent lots of messages.” You don’t have to ask to know who this friend is and Ran understands it very well, because he continues without waiting for you to ask who he is talking about. “I answered him and told him you’ll stay with me. Apparently what I did at the party reached him.”

Never once he looks away from you, waiting for anything from you. A small frown, barely there sigh, tears or glossy eyes. But nothing comes, so he asks. Simply, because he desires to know. “Are you upset? I can give you your phone back if you want to call Kakucho. I know you’ve become close since that party.” There’s nothing you are feeling. No sadness, no remorse, no heart in the stomach. It stays in your chest where it’s supposed to be. So you shrug and put a little bit of yellow cheesecake on your spoon. You taste it, the back of the spoon hanging from your mouth. It tastes good. Really really good.

“I am not upset and we are just close friends. Nothing more.” “Nothing more?” “Nope.” “That’s good. Anyway, do you want to rent something to watch later today?” It is good and yes you do. Of course you do.

With his hair up in a messy bun, loose strands falling all over his face and glasses always falling off past his nose bridge, Ran looks ridiculous. You tell him just that.

He also looks very domestic, very warm and safe, but you aren’t about to tell him that. He understands it anyway.

_ On the fourth day of getting back to Ran he leaves the apartment very early in the morning and doesn’t return until the evening when the clock strikes eight.

It’s very boring without him there. With nothing to do you read Rindou’s book about healthy food and when you finish it, you read his handouts about the importance of music in western world. Both food and music are dull topics to you, but with nothing to do it’s better than just sitting on the sofa and waiting for Ran to come home. You also watch TV. MTV with loud pop and all the same techno music and then some soap opera with an all too obvious plot on TBS. You even tune in on the football match on TBS Sports and find it a bit entertaining.

But then the match ends and Ran isn’t home yet and you have no idea where your phone is so you could’ve called him [you don’t have his number], so you get up and get to cooking. Cooking is nice and it’s creative enough for you to lose yourself in it. You notice a pack of shaving razor’s on the kitchen countertop and wonder how they even got there.

You take them back to the bathroom. When Ran does come home it’s dark outside and he doesn’t look any different. It’s raining again and his hair and clothes are a bit wet, which makes you think that he didn’t use his car. You so want to ask him where he has been and why has he left you alone, but you don’t dare.

You stare at him from the safe space of Rindou’s room. Watch him take his coat off, then his boots and then he is right by your side. “I wanna see your scars,” he asks, almost pleading, and this is so unlike him, so not Ran and everything you know about him, you think you heard him wrong, but he repeats, “I want to see you. You aren’t afraid of me, are you?” And you aren’t. You were never afraid of Ran and his vicious, sometimes cruel, nature, because to you he was never like that. You never saw him as a person capable of turning another human being's fingers into a bloody mess that won’t ever heal. To you, Ran is Ran. Beautiful sleepy eyes and gentle touches. A never ending worry for the people he loves and all the knowledge about flowers he once read in the encyclopaedia of his gone from his life forever mother.

Without saying anything, holding onto each other’s gaze, you strip to your underwear. Your scars ugly tissues of messy skin, are wanting to be hidden. They scream at you and cry and rebel. They promise you, you can hide them under other scars, more brutal, more deadly, more deep, but you don’t believe them anymore.

Nothing ever will steal them away from you. They are now you and you have to carry them for as long as you live. No sharks or stakes are the option.

Cold fingers burn your warm skin. Ran’s hands glide across every patch of your existence that once were wronged by you. He finds every single one. On your arms, your legs and thighs. Your ribs and lower back. He doesn’t say anything, but his hands tremble and that is enough for you to understand everything. Him and his reasons.

When he claws your waist with his fingertips and brings you close to him in an impossible tight hug, you start crying. Your own hands fist the plush of his sweater and you want it gone, because you need to feel him close to you. Skin to skin and nothing apart.

The pressure from his fingers is painful, and if he presses more, he’ll leave blooming bruises, but you won’t mind it. You wouldn’t mind it at all, because just this once it’s so nice to be safe and sound in the arms of someone other than Rindou or Haruchiyo. It’s so nice, so so nice, to want something more and not be afraid of it.

It’s like blooming camellias and stinging honey bees.

_ Fully dressed with sanrio cookies Ran got at 7-Eleven, you sit near him on the floor, on the Rindou’s blanket you spread across it for warmth and comfort. Your tears have long dried and the Ghibli movie is now playing on the TV. The room is dark, the rain is still falling and Ran is slowly falling asleep.

“You know, I’ve never rejected you,” he yawns, laying down. “That summer. I didn’t reject you. I thought you and Rin had something going on between you and that’s why I said what I said. Maybe if I were to… Anyway, it doesn’t matter now. Let’s just watch the movie.” Ran doesn’t make it to the end. He dozes off right at the moment when Chichiro boards the train and suddenly you too lose interest in a magical movie with so much sense behind its gentle animation. For a couple of seconds that stretch into an endless drop of water you bring your knees to your chest and stare outside the window. The view is nothing much. A grey building and dimly lit street lamp. Not a soul passes under the windows and you don’t hear any voices or laughs. No steps or coughs and rustling of clothes. Maybe there’s a black cat there somewhere, but its paws are too soft to make any noise. It most definitely won’t reach the second floor. Especially with rain meeting the pavement and cars and roofs, and maybe cats, but hopefully not.

That night that summer it was raining too or so you were told, because you don’t remember. Drunk, high and very very sad you were brought into Haruchiyo’s apartment where he cared for you as best as an eighteen year boy could about an eighteen year old wronged girl. And in that crumpled dusty bar in Roppongi another act of love was happening. More vicious and more cold. Rindou has never told you about it, but you know him and Ran well enough to know that they did it together. Haitani brothers and all.

You are too lazy to go to the kitchen and put sanrio cookies in the cupboard where they belong so you place them on the table near the TV. You grab the remote and switch the movie off. Darkness envelops the apartment, but you are used to it and then there’s that street lamp with its light and Ran. Slowly, you sneak under the blanket and curl next to him.

His breaths are even and methodical. His heart beats the same and he is very very warm. He is asleep and you so desperately want to sneak into his dream and live there. Meet the bees and blooming camellias along with other beautiful flowers he knows by heart. It must smell so good there and it must be day. Full family at the table and everything is good. Cats can be heard from miles away and fire is never burning the skin, only purifying. It never hurts there.

Just like it never hurts near Ran.

“Stop thinking so loudly,” Ran turns on the side, arm hooking across your waist and brings you closer to him, his body and his peace, “You are waking me up with those thoughts of yours. It’s gonna be alright. We are… I… It’s… I…” Whatever he said is lost on you, because he falls asleep again. This time, in his arms, in his warmth, it’s easier for you to close your eyes, because after many many days you are eager to open them again. _ This time, you don’t wake up first, but you wake under an intense gaze and hand caressing your face. He doesn’t stop when you open your eyes, curiously, looking at him and you don’t stop him when he leans in and kisses you. Slowly and sweetly. Besides drunk games at parties where you pecked a couple of boys, you’ve never ever kissed anyone, because you loved them. And right now doing exactly that - kissing the person you love, - your chest burns and you are not sure what you are supposed to do and how to suppress all those whimpers and moans you are so readily feed Ran with.

Somewhere in the kiss, right after he hugs you impossibly closer to him, both arms around you, he smiles. The flame in your chest is now fire, and so you push him away. “What?” He asks leaning in again, this time pressing wet open mouthed kisses across your jaw. It makes it harder to speak, breath uneven and clogged, “Why are you smiling?” Surprised, he looks up, “I thought you were gonna ask me what the kiss was about, but you so you, and… why do you think I am smiling?” He waits for an answer and your brain runs kilometres in a millisecond, but you can’t come up with a decent answer that is not embarrassing or humiliating and full of self–doubt. Instead, you want to kiss Ran more and you want him to hug you tight again, hands holding you together, in one piece. And so you do. And it feels nice and it feels beautiful and right. And probably you should have had a conversation about all these before, but as he said you are you and he is Ran Haitani, and you kinda like doing everything in mysterious complicated ways only understandable to you. So you kiss more and he kisses across your face and under your jaw and then your neck where he plants bites and hickeys that bloom right away. Pretty shades of purple. Only when you are sitting on top of him and his hands slide under your [his] shirt, does he stop. Hair a wild mess, he tilts his head and retracts his hands from your bare waist moving them to your face, which he cradles with all the gentleness in the world. He searches for something, anything, in your expression, but only finds swollen lips and pretty eyes that hold all the stored love they never gave away. And he crumbles, falling so hard and so fast, you hear the air crying and flowers blooming in his chest.

Right at this moment, you both know, he’d do whatever you want and this will either be the best reward of his life or his demise. [As if you ever would let the last happen]. Ran presses a small barely there kiss to the corner of your lips and nudges your cheek with his nose. He takes a deep content breath full of the meaning you don’t catch on. Not because you don’t understand, but because you can’t, because he holds your head to his and kisses that sweet place right below your ear. Because he whispers, asking you, “How do you feel?” “Good. I feel good, Ran. I really really do,” you breathe out, hands clutching onto his shoulders. You can’t see his face, he buries it in your neck, inhaling your very being into himself. Storing you and what you are to the depths of his heart to where he will never let anyone reach.

Your skin absorbs his smile and it makes you happy. So happy, you believe, if you died right there in his arms, an army of bees and the prettiest pink camellias would swerve from your ashes and Ran would name them all.

_ The afternoon was spent exchanging lazy kisses and tender caresses. The time passes and the rain continues and when you stand outside of Haitani’s apartment building waiting for Ran who forgot his card upstairs, you inhale the wet aroma of pavement and green leaves and everything seems fine. Uncertain and wobbly, but fine.

You actually believe that if sharks would come right now and try to swallow you for the first time ever you would fucking fight them. And they would back off. _ “You know, we should have ordered,” Ran complains in his small accusatory voice that you haven’t heard in so long. “You are soaking.” “Maybe. But then the poor delivery guy would’ve suffered and the food would be cold and…” Ran gives you the look. The one you haven’t forgotten, but could never crack up before. Where he believes you are very cute, but hella naive and a bit stupid. Now, though, you know what this small smile with a very relaxed face means. Now, that you know, you just nod embarrassment overflowing, and turn away from him, cheeks hot and hands trembling. He notices it all. He finds you endearingly cute. So cute, he wants to tear you apart. “You know, let’s just eat our burgers and get home.” “Burgers and fries, Ran. You did order fries, right?” “Yeah. Yeah. And fries. I just really wanna get you home.” _

“Say it again,” Ran murmurs, tenderly kissing your right cheek. His hair is still wet from the shower and his skin is slightly tinted red from the hot water. The huge tattoo that splits his body in half is more evident than ever and you find your gaze lingering there, tracing pretty shapes of it.

He doesn’t wear much. Only sweatpants. And straddling him, legs hugging his hips, you can clearly tell that there’s nothing under them. Only him and his bare skin. The smell of his shampoo and gel shower lingers in the room and it’s unclear if it’s from him or from you since you’ve been indulgently using his toiletries this whole time. Not because you always wanted to be closer to him, but because there was just no way you’d use Rindou’s mint one. Vanilla and bergamot it is then.

And now, all senses high and elevated, you claw at Ran’s naked shoulders, letting him slowly mouth your neck and you throw your head back, and you inhale this pleasant aroma that will forever remain you of these days and you desperately try to compose yourself. Dissolving into him would be easier, but you want to remember every single moment and every single sensation, and so you stay. “When was the last time you had sex?” In his question there’s no shame or hesitation, and it’s good. Really good. Because Ran doesn’t want to hide his intentions and pretend nothing is going to happen since this morning it was clear you would be under him today.

“And with whom. I wanna know who had you last.” There’s slight fear in his last demand and you want to wonder why, but you stop yourself before your mind could create impossible scenarios and trap you. You pull back a little, peering into his face. You need to know why he is asking you this and as if he understands you, he leans forward pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

“I am asking, because I need to know how hard I can go and what you can take from me.” His hands, warm and attentive, slide under your shirt. You too wear nothing under it. He doesn’t seem too surprised when he finds it out. Instead, he stops at the small of your back and hugs you closer to him. “I don’t want to hurt you or make you do something you aren’t ready for.” If not for the gentle fire in your heart, you would’ve cried. But you drop your head down, unable to look him in the eyes anymore. There’s something in them you aren’t mentally prepared for and Ran should be fearing about it more, than he does about sex. “I am not afraid of you and you won’t hurt me.” You say and then something possesses you and you cradle his face in your palms and you hold the whole world there and he isn’t aware of it and everything hurts, but in a good sweet way. “Can we kiss some more? I really like kissing you and I like you. You asked me to say it again and I will. I like you, Ran. So so so much.”

Ran kisses wet and sloppily and he grabs at your waist so clumsily, so unsure and so uncertain that it sells him immediately away. He has never kissed anyone like this and now that he has it has him spiralling. And so out of his mind, he pulls you closer, his bare chest against your [his] t-shirt and he does it again, and then again and again, as if could possibly merge with you, because being like this seems so so so far away to him. He wants you closer and it physically hurts him not being able to. And so he takes a good look at your flustered face, your perfect collarbones picking out of the loose clothing and dives in to kiss you again. This time he doesn’t stop only at your lips, but he mouths across your neck, guiding his tongue across the bruises he left this morning. He smiles all the way down to your collarbones and his smile makes you smile too, and despite you being quite shy and awkward you grin, melting in his happiness.

If that’s how love feels, it feels good, it feels right and it might help you. It should. You want to give it the power to.

Somewhere between losing yourself in each other completely and starving hands, Ran hooks his fingers under the hem of your t-shirt and lifts it upwards. There must not be enough of you for him and so he wants more. But you freeze, heart beating so fast, it’s going to burst any second now, and Ran understands. He puts a gentle sweet kiss on your lips and presses his forehead to yours.

His breathing is ragged and fast.

“We don’t have to do anything. It won’t be good for you if you feel…,” he starts, but you take all those words with your mouth on his. You don’t want to hear what he has to say, because you know what it’s going to be. And you don’t want your fear to overwhelm you, because that’s what has been living inside you and that’s what you’ve been trying to carve out of your soul. With razors, scissors and knives. Never with love or understanding. You slip away from him. You take off your shirt and place it near you on the bed. Ran watches you. His eyes are hazy and unfocused, but not any move of yours passes by unattended by him. He glides over your breasts and there’s a slight jerk under you and suddenly you want to hide yourself. You almost do, but then you think better of it and you raise your hips and you try to take your sweatpants off, but Ran stops you. “Don’t,” he murmurs, flipping you on your back. “Don’t. I wanna do everything myself. I want to undress you myself. And I want you to kiss your body and I want to play with your tits until you lose your mind and then I want to eat you out and make you cum, because you fucking deserve it. Because this fucking tension needs to go the fuck away. Okay? And then I want to kiss you and then I want to fuck you and I will watch your face as I do it. I’ve always wanted to see your sweet pretty face under me. Always wanted to hear how you will scream for me and how insanely perfect you’ll be with my cock inside you. Okay?” You nod and he does exactly what he said. And Ran is attentive and careful and very very kind. He talks you through everything and doesn’t push your buttons even though a couple of times you secretly wish he did. That night it’s only one round. Mainly because he is too exhausted and sleepy after he cleans you up and dresses you in his boxers and a new clean t-shirt.

You don’t change sheets though and decide against opening the window. Because it’s heavily raining outside again and because none of you wants to get up from the warm bed and lose the comfort of each other. “Is it too early to say that I love you?” He whispers, taking a full deep breath.

You think it’s not, but you say that it is and he laughs seemingly seeing through your small insincerity. “Okay. Then you should ride me tomorrow morning. I deserve it after today.” “You know, Ran, I think this is too, too early to ask of me.” “Really?” “Well, yeah.” “But I kinda already asked and I kinda already…” A loud thunderstorm slams Tokyo and you get startled. Your body is aching in all the pleasant ways and you don’t have any capability in yourself to continue this ridiculous conversation. You press a kiss to his chest and hide yourself in the crook of his neck. You are safe and you are in love and pain is still there, and memories will never die, but pink camellias are blooming and bees are going to return. _ Rindou is not supposed to get back next afternoon, but he does.

It’s still raining and Haruchiyo is at his back complaining about how much he hates humidity, because his hair gets all frizzy and ugly. [Not that someone particularly cares about Haruchiyo’s hair, but Rindou is too tired to argue with him, so he just hums.] Because he understands where Haruchiyo comes from and he is also still tipsy.

Yesterday, before boarding the bus they did drink a little too much. But the bar they camped in in the night, ditching the comfort of the hotel, was nice and the girl that sucked Rindou off in the back alley behind that said bar, was pretty much exceptional, so he won’t complain.

Besides, he and Haruchiyo, but Rindou more or so he believes, were too worried for you to stay in Osaka. All the girls in the back alleys be damned, they need to see you and make sure you are alright. Short unconstant messages from Ran - “oh, she is fine”, “don’t worry i got her” and “she’ll be just fine” - were not cutting the white patch of horrors off for him.

Rindou needed to talk to you. He needed to do his little check up and maybe [most definitely] buy you some expensive patterned paper and a couple of cute storage boxes. And because he feels generous enough you’ll stop at Daiso and buy all the stickers you want too.

“Does it smell like mackerel or am I tripping? Again,” deadpans Haruchiyo taking off his soaking wet shoes. He dumps the sports bag with all his clothes next to Rindou’s and waits for him to take his last evening white now grey Adidas sneakers to go check into the living room. It does indeed smell like grilled fish and vegetables inside the apartment. Tofu and spring onion. He tries his very best to remember when was the last time their apartment smelt of homemade food and simply can’t. To his own dismay, this special cosiness of familiarity and domesticity were more native to Haruchiyo’s studio. But that’s only because you spent a lot of time there.

Getting high, getting creative and being you. It clicks and responds and suddenly everything makes perfect sense and they could’ve stayed in Osaka for two days more as planned.

So when they enter the living room and find you picking out bones out of the fish, Rindou is not surprised. He is not surprised when he notices that it’s actually Ran’s plate in front of you and this small act of service is for him and him only. And he is so not surprised when his own brother doesn’t pay any attention to them staring at you both. His thin lips curled into a tiny smile, chin prompted on his hands as he watches you knowing there won’t be anyone else.

And there never were.

It’s all so simple and so fucking stupid.

“Rindou! Haru!” You notice them, of course you do, and you set the chopsticks aside and run to them, somehow hugging both of them at such an awkward angle, the hug doesn’t last long.

In the back, Ran clearly rolls his eyes and drags the plate with the boneless fish to him. It makes a disturbing screeching sound.

“Weren’t you supposed to be back much later? Like in two days?”

“We changed plans,” Rindou replies without an ounce of venom or disappointment of whatever else he is supposed to feel right now at his brother’s not so inviting tone, “But I guess we were wrong to rush.” Near him Haruchiyo snorts, Ran laughs a little and you with your neck and collarbones a perfect constellation of purple flowers, get so shy, Rindou himself cracks a smile.

It’s evident where he is looking and what he is reading from it all, and your hand - trembling as per usual - flies to your head, in a poor attempt to cover what can be seen from miles away. More than anything, at this moment, Rindou wants to tell you that there’s nothing you should be ashamed of, nothing to worry about in his presence.

Hickeys, cuts, bruises and all the blemishes are evidence of feelings and we people are meant to feel them. We are meant to experience them in our own ways.

But he can’t say that now. He’ll do it later.

Now, he throws his arm around your shoulders, kisses the top of your head and excuses himself to the bathroom.

He needs that hot fucking shower now.

_ Three days later the rain stops.

Haruchiyo goes home the day after they arrive from Osaka and you spend two more nights at Haitani’s.

You leave when it’s sunny and not so cold for January. Ran offers you his long grey coat and a deep kiss to your lips. At that Rindou rolls his eyes, but he is smiling and so it’s fine.

They both promise you they’ll stop by your apartment in the evening to go have dinner together. You all settle on something french. It’s weird how today your wants align and you aren’t about to pass this extreme luck of not quarrelling on where to eat.

[You feel like today is going to be a nice day.]

Your parents are home. Your little sister too. The house smells like butter and caramel. They probably had something sweet and nice for breakfast. The last time you ate with them together in the morning was so far away you can barely remember it. It saddens you, but only a little.

“What are you watching?” You ask your sister. She sits on the floor, her legs inside the kotatsu. It seems to be a new one, because the wooden frame is white instead of dark brown. You’ve never noticed they changed it and you don’t know why. Something might have happened to it or perhaps your mom just wanted a small change. She can be like that sometimes.

“National Geographic,” she replies without turning her head. “Is it interesting?” You genuinely inquire and she gives you a weirded out look. She shrugs, “I guess so. You learn a lot of things about the world we live in. Like did you know that all flowers have meanings behind them? Yellow roses mean friendship, tulips mean perfect love and camellias symbolise romantic love, adoration and care. It’s pretty cool. Don’t you think so?”

From the kitchen with two puddings and small all too familiar from childhood silver spoon in her hands emerges your mother. She has a sweet hesitant smile and her face is so lovely and you missed her so so so much. She sits next to you and opens the pudding for you. You think that if she was to feed you, you’d gladly accept. Any neglected love you can take from her you will. “Oh, and bees… that don’t fly south. They actually never fly away,” your sister says and your mother laughs for one reason or another and there’s tears in her eyes and what your sister just said makes no sense at all to anyone,

but you. [Maybe tomorrow will be the same too.]

#haitani x reader #haitani ran imagines #haitani brothers #ran #ran fluff #ran x y/n #ran x reader #ran x you #ran haitani #tokyo rev x you #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo rev smut #haitani rindou #sanzu haruchiyo

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rinrinx2 · 2 months

Note

hiii!! Could you do something about Ran (tenjiku) with a reader (woman) based on Valentine's Day??? <3

Sorry if it's misspelled, English is not my first language :(

Valentine’s Day Fiasco

Ran x reader

Summary: your boyfriend who has lost his spontaneous charm takes you on a spontaneous evening.

Warnings: Smut, inappropriate language, mentions of d€at and murder.

(Accidentally wrote about Bonten Ran)

Ran was romantic but not the type to dance in the rain, spontaneous kind. No, he was the plan a dinner and get you flowers type. He always said if the two of you had met as teenagers then perhaps he’d be more spontaneous but now as an aged man the only thing he would do spontaneously was spend money.

And that’s what led you to where you were tonight, on Valentine’s Day. Sitting in one of the most elite restaurants in Tokyo, picking away at some overpriced Sashimi.

“You like it?” Ran asked as he peered over his wine glass just as he was about to take a sip.

“Yes of course baby” your replied trying to enjoy your evening.

It wasn’t that you were ungrateful for his extravagant nights out, but you longed for the youthful Ran that would make an evening out of nothing. The young Ran Haitani who had two braids and a dream.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you hadn’t even noticed the shift in Ran’s aura, from calm and relaxed to on edge. As if he was waiting for something to happen.

“Shit” Ran whispered loud enough to snap you out of your thoughts.

You looked over at Ran, eyes wide with wonderment as you watched as he Ran his hand through his hair trying to sooth out the random strands that fell to his face in frustration.

Ran took a deep breath before he took a quick sip of his champagne.

“Grab your bag and walk to the exit, I’ll call the waiter and just wait for me outside” Ran said casually as if not to alert others.

You looked at Ran with confusion painted on your face. Taken aback by his words and more so by his demand.

“I didn’t finish my supper yet Ran and we ordered dessert, can’t we wait” you nagged hoping that he’d at least let you finish your valentines meal.

“Just listen to me and do what I say” Ran said now with a more serious tone as his eyes starred dead into yours.

You knew that look was not asking for you to test him, but rather for you to comply or the worst would happen.

So, without much of a fight your grabbed your purse and got up from the table as you made your way to the exit.

As you made your way through the restaurant you turned your head back to see Ran standing by the your waiter as he pulled out his wallet rushing to pay. Your journey out of this exclusive restaurant took longer than it felt and you constantly felt the eyes of a man on you which only prompted you to walk faster out.

Standing in the cool evening air waiting for Ran outside of a restaurant was not what you’d expected for a valentines evening.

And just as you were about to continue your internal complaining, you saw Ran walking out of the restaurant. His shoulders slumped forward almost trying to hide himself within with his brows furrowed. The opposite of how he usually was, his confident aura replaced with one of a guard dog ready to attack at any sound.

“Come on, we have to get going” Ran said grabbing your hand as you he dragged you along.

You tugged on his grip trying to loosen it unsure of what was happening and his little explanation was not helping your mood either as you grew more rebellious. Now pulling yourself out of his grip as you looked at him with confusion and anger.

“What is going on?” You questioned with concern.

“(Y/N) come now, I don’t have time for this”

“Just tell me what’s going on, I hate being dragged around like a rag doll” you said now with a raised tone.

“Just come now. Don’t make me say it again-”

“I fucking knew I saw that Haitani scum” a man said as the restaurant door swung open not to far from where the two of you stood.

A tall lanky man with a face tattoo of a snake traveling along the side of his face.

“Shit” Ran muttered under his breath as he grabbed your hand again, but this time you held no resistance sensing the worry and panic that emanated from Ran a feeling that you barely ever saw Ran feel.

The two of you began to run through the streets of Tokyo, scraping through people and pushing them over as you tried your best to get as far as your feet would allow you. Turning around ever so often seeing how close the lanky man with four of his henchmen trailing use.

“I’m gonna get you Haitani” the lanky man screamed as he began to pull out a gun from his blazer pocket.

“Quick, turn into this alley at the next turn” Ran said as he started sprinting to gain more distance praying that he would lose the men behind you or at least get you out of harms way.

When the turn approached the two of you ran into the alley quickly running through the maze of hidden backroads hoping that the two of you would lose the men chasing after you.

When Ran believed that the two of you were in the clearing he began to slow his pace as he moved the two of you behind a wall to catch your breath before use ventured on.

“What the fuck was that about” you said gasping for air, as you shot daggers at Ran.

“I may have killed someone close to him” Ran said as he looked over at you with that cheeky grin now plastering his face.

“How fucking close was that person to him, Ran!” You said as you were about to wipe the smile off of his face.

“Calm down it was only his dog… well Urhm kinda like not the dog but the owner of the dog who was his brother”

“What!”

“You killed his brother” you said now seething.

“Mikey sent me to do it and so I did” Ran replied as he now caught his breath fully.

“And if Mikey told you to jump off a cliff you’d do it too”

“I mean for the right amount I would”

“You’re an asshole you know that, you ruined Valentine’s Day” you said as you looked at him.

Ran watched as you stared at him with that burning passion of hate, taking in your figure, all disheveled from running, the sweat causing your hair to stick to your neck and the way your hair looked all wind swept from the running and the way your black dress was now even shorter and somehow looked tighter from having ran as fast as you had.

The look you dawned now made something in Ran stir, something carnal that he hadn’t felt in awhile and the way you spoke to him only drove him more wild.

“Are you evening fucking listening to me”you said as you placed your hands on your hips.

“Oh I’m listening all right” Ran said as he walked over to you now, as he pinned you to the wall behind you, knocking the air out of your lungs.

You looked at Ran with eyes blown wide, you looked into his pupils, only seeing the black of them starring back at you and watching as those sharp canines showed themselves.

Somehow the spontaneous teen Ran had made an appearance and you stood there shell shocked until you felt his hands begin to wonder your body.

“I fucking missed this” Ran whispered against your neck and he let his hands travel up your sides while his tongue lapped at your neck.

“Ran” you whimpered out almost trying to get him to stop.

“Shut up” he commanded as his hands now began to travel in between your legs.

The cool evening air mixing with his hot tongue was causing ripples of pleasure to shoot through you.

You felt as Ran’s finger tips began to prod at your puffy cunt, as he now slid his fingers up and down your clit causing soft moans to slip past your lips.

Ran’s other hand pulled down the straps of your dress pulling down the ones of your bra with them to reveal you plump breast as his mouth to left your neck to travel to your breast.

Taking a nipple in his mouth as his sucked on it as his fingers now pushed past your panties to know play with the leaking hole of your pussy.

“Ran” you cried out hoping he’d give you more as you felt his fingers slip in and out of you getting faster and faster. Feeling the way he curled them as he fucked you with them.

Your nipples hard from him sucking on them and you clit swollen from his fucking his fingers into you as you road them. Feeling as you got closer, with your lips dry and open gasping for air as you felt your high approach but just as you reached it Ran pulled his fingers out pulling away your orgasm.

Leaving you panting wanting more.

You couldn’t take it anymore, and like a needy bitch in heat you pulled at his trousers freeing his cock.

You looked at the leaking tip as you now turned around presenting your leaky cunt to him to use.

The sight of you being needy was driving Ran nuts and he couldn’t take it anymore from the sight of you presenting yourself like prey ready to be devoured, so he took the opportunity with all and he began to fuck you from behind as you clung to the wall for dear life.

Ran’s cock twitched as your cunt sucked him in, feeling the curve of his cock knock at your walls drove you close to your high once again. And Ran to was close from all the adrenaline rushing through his veins.

“Fucking take it you slut”

“Fucking take my cock” Ran said through gritted teeth as he fucked you faster and faster as you cried out in pleasure.

“You want my cum?” Ran asked as he pulled your hair.

“Yes I want it please!” You pleaded out.

“Then fucking beg for it”

“Please give me your cum. Please I need it. I’ll be a good girl. Please my pussy needs to be filled up” you begged over and over, until finally you felt that hot spurts of liquid shoot into you as you crashed around Ran’s cock creaming on it milking the rest of his cum out of his cock.

Ran pulled out as he once again tried to catch his breath, but just as you began to gasp for air the tall lanky man appeared again and Ran once again grabbed your hand not wasting a moment to start his sprinting.

“Can’t you do something?” You asked as you ran feeling as sweat once again started to run down your neck and his cum down your thighs.

“Like what?” Ran questioned.

“Don’t you have a gun”

“Oh yeah” Ran said as he now pulled out a gun from his suit jacket and quickly turned around just in time before the lanky man could react as he shot him right in the chest.

Ran now walked over to the shot man and his henchmen, giving the henchmen a look he gave his victims when he wanted information from them. The look that scared even the most brave.

“You wanna be next” he asked them, as the men looked frightened.

“This is the part where you run away” Ran said as he began to reload his gun watching as the men ran away.

You walked over to Ran who now put his gun away.

You looked down to the man that lie on the ground bleeding out.

“What’s going to happen to him?” You questioned.

“His gonna see his brother again” Ran said with a snicker as he grabbed your hand as the two of you made your way back to the main roads of Tokyo.

“So did you have a great Valentine’s Day?”

“It was something” you replied.

“I got a massive bouquet but I left it in the car” Ran said as the two of you walked off into the night.

“Shit! I forget we could’ve just driven off instead of done this goose chase thing”

“You think snake rat face guy will let us redo this chase again but this time I use the car” Ran said.

“I doubt he will honey” you said as you patted his arm.

“Gosh darn it”

Hope you liked it

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megumiivs · 11 months

Text

07/18/23 - ran haitani

imagine being ran’s first partner. like he was a huge ass player before u and now u have him wrapped around ur finger. you need someone beat up? he’s on it. you need someone to fund your shopping addiction? he’ll gladly hand over his credit card. you’re literally the only person in roppongi that no one would dare touch in fear of ran. but like he’s literally so soft whenever he’s around u. he could be threatening this guy with his baton when you approach him. 10 seconds later, ran’s turning around to face you with a soft, loving smile and the guy is on the floor passed out.

dont really like ran but i might start writing for him me thinks heheheh

#[ lilith loves tokyorev 🌟]#tokyo rev x reader #tokyo rev x y/n #tokyo manji gang #tokyo rev fluff #tokyo revengers #tokyo rev x you #tokyo rev smut #tokyo rev headcanons #ran haitani #haitani ran headcanons #haitani ran imagines #haitani brothers #haitani fluff

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sunaluv · 1 year

Text

Imagine being bonten!rans lil girlfriend and threatening anyone who tries to hit on you.

Decided to tag along to an event that was going on at your man’s bar. He’s out there somewhere handling all the business stuffs whilst your at the bar making good use of his resources.

Some random guy slides into the seat next to you with a smirk in his face trying to flirt with you and trying to buy you drinks and it was flattering at first to know you still pull, but this man will not let up.

“You better leave before my boyfriend gets here, he’s crazy. Kills people.”

The guy laughs out loud. “Real funny sweetheart. If you didn’t want me ya shoulda just said so.”

You rolled your eyes, smiling at the sight of your boyfriend approaching the two of you, way to calmly for your liking. He gets to the bar, not even acknowledging the little scene going on. You just know he was watching from across the bar somewhere.

His eyes wordlessly look into yours, making sure your okay before staring down the guy trying to hit on you.

“You’ve got real quiet now man,” his arm wraps around your waist. “What business do you have with my girl over here?”

The guy surprisingly holds his ground well for being tipsy and sized up by a notorious criminal. “Got no business with ‘er, just a pretty lil thing is all.”

His arms are no longer around you as a humorless chuckle leaves his lips. “Real pretty, you’re right.” Coincidentally the flashing strobe lights of the club catch the shiny metal of his baton. “D’ya wanna go talk about how pretty she is outside?”

He held his hands up. “I don’t wan’t no trouble. Didn’t know she was yours, honest.”

His hand came heavy on his shoulder, squeezing it harshly. “What’s wrong, you don’t think she’s pretty anymore? Look how sad my baby is?”

The question was obviously rhetorical as he ‘gently’ guided the man out the fire exit before he could even look at you.

You patiently waited, thankful the vibrating bass music drowned out what you knew was going on outside.

Six minutes later he returned, surprisingly cleaner than you would’ve thought him to be.

“Looks like I’ve still got it, huh?” You teased.

“You do,” he hugged you waist from behind, pecking your cheek. “It’s a gift and a curse having someone as pretty as you baby.”

#tokyo revengers x you #tokyo rev x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo rev drabbles #ran haitani x reader #ran x reader #ran haitani #haitani ran imagines #haitani ran x reader #tokyo revengers fluff #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers imagine #tr fluff #tr x reader #tr x y/n #tr x you #tokyo rev headcanons #tokrev x reader

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haitani-maki · 17 days

Text

𝑊𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑚𝑦 𝑠𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡𝑠

⭒Mild ANGST

⭒This is my first time writing angst, maybe it's not good

⭒English is not my first language

You and Ran met in your early 20s in a stupid way. You were on your way to college and ended up bumping into him, he found it funny that you were desperately apologizing, you didn't know whether to focus on him or the clock because you were late. It was a peaceful day for him as he was just passing through.

For some reason he couldn't forget you, he thought you were beautiful, your voice was cute and you had a nice smile. He would like to see that smile again

Maybe he was in luck… 3 days later he saw you in the dessert shop where he sells his favorite mont blanc

You had left college and went to meet some friends there

Ran addressing you as "the late girl", you couldn't help but blush at this and apologize again for almost running him over.

He says it's no problem, a quick exchange of words and he asks for your number, you exchanged a few messages until he finally asked you out on a date. Believe it or not, he was insecure at first, it took him a few months to tell you that he was a member of a gang called Kanto Manji. When you said everything was fine but asked not to be involved, it was like a weight had been lifted off of him, he thought you would leave and never speak to him again. After all, being part of a gang is not something that is well regarded, is it?

As time went by, things between you were getting more serious, you've met his brother, you were spending more time together, or rather, you were starting to spend more time at his house, not only because you lived a little far away but according to his words, he slept better hugging you.

Well, things got more serious at Kanto Manji too. Coming soon Bonten.

Ran spending more time away, taking longer to respond to your messages or ignoring some, him and his brother showing up with a new tattoo, new clothes and expensive gifts for you as an apology...

You weren't one to meddle in his business, but you couldn't help but wonder what was going on

You tried to talk to him but he soon interrupted you, saying that everything was fine, that things were getting better and that you didn't need to worry

But Ran was changing...

He was distancing himself not only because he was busy with gang stuff but because he was starting to realize that he shouldn't have gotten involved with you, he shouldn't have let you get attached, he shouldn't have gone this far.

Ran saw a lot of things happen, he saw a lot of people die, he lost some people. He knew the dangers in the world he lives in and he was starting to become a big target

Kanto Manji (now Bonten) was growing fast, was gaining power, starting to get on the radar of the police and rival organizations

He wouldn't forgive himself if something happened to you, you became someone important to him. Someone he would give his life to protect besides his brother.

Rindou knew how to protect himself but what about you? He goes crazy just thinking about someone threatening you, you don't want to know what he would do if someone dared to lay a finger on you

You spent enough time together to say you loved each other, yes he loves you

That's why it's been difficult for him, Ran can't make you a target, someone with dreams and who has the opportunity to live a life different from his.

Ran is hating himself and he's conflicted, he's hating himself because soon he's going to have to hurt you, he's going to have to push you away, but he doesn't want to lose you.

Soon you would become just two people who knew each other.

And this is what happened.

He broke up with you claiming that he no longer felt anything for you, that he didn't need to be stuck with just one since now he can have as many as he wants

You didn't believe it at first, you tried to talk to him, but his cold gaze at you felt like blades.

He loved you, why did that change? What made him change? He betrayed you?

No, he just wanted to protect you.

The look that was once tender just for you, became the same cold look he used for his enemies

He needed to be cruel, he needed to push you away and it didn't matter if you knew what you were getting into

It was better this way, you would be safer this way.

It was difficult at first, of course it was, you were left in pieces...

The memories haunting you, places you went together, movies you watched, songs you heard together and that damn dessert shop where you first talked

It was like torture for Ran to see you cry, no punch hurt as much as him being the reason you cried

He wanted to hug you, he wanted to apologize, he wanted to tell you his reasons, he wanted to stop you from walking through that door...

His ego, his pride didn't matter at that moment, he didn't want you to leave, the best thing that ever happened to him

But he couldn't put his life at risk, he couldn't destroy his dreams, he'll have to live with this pain

Work kept him busy with his thoughts for a while... But for the first time in his life, Ran had trouble sleeping.

Nights and more nights Ran looking at your photo

Nights and more nights Ran looking at your saved contact, resisting the temptation to call you.

He wanted to hear your voice once again, he wanted to see you smile once again, he wanted to hear you smile once again

The first woman who sincerely laughed at his bad jokes.

You shined in his eyes.

No other woman could replace you.

Years passed...

You've changed, your hair has changed, your clothes have changed.

You graduated, got a good job, you live well but your smile was never the same.

Ran has also changed, his hair has changed and if before he was a cold person, now he is worse.

He was never the same again.

It's not just because he's the executive of Japan's largest organization

It's because he no longer has the person who made him soft.

You still love him, he still loves you.

Both learned to live separately.

They both got used to this pain.

They are both living their lives.

Sometimes, some memories haunt you both

Bonten always appearing in the news

You try to ignore

One night, you were leaving a restaurant after a celebration with friends.

Ran stopped in traffic, saw you leave, he almost didn't recognize you... Until he saw his smile, now a little sad but still beautiful in his eyes.

You didn't see him, the windows of his car were closed, you were distracted talking to some friends.

He was close to you and you had no idea

Ran wanted to get out of the car, he wanted to talk to you, he wanted to know if you were okay

Ran wanted to tell you the truth about that day, he wanted to have you in his arms again, he wanted to take you with him

But if he was, would you listen to him? Would you take him back?

He hurt you, didn't he? Do you hate him?

Can he be selfish and take her back?

Do you allow it to be just your smile and nothing else that hurts?

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g0kotta · 2 years

Text

Better without you

They cheat on you / break up with you, but you actually get happier without them.

Sanzu Haruchiyo, Haitani Rindou, Hanma Shuji, Haitani Ran(and Mitsuya Takashi;) ) x gn!reader

PART TWO

Now playing: Don Toliver - No Idea

Sanzu Haruchiyo

Since you've been gone, I've been just okay

“You’re nothing without me.” Sanzu points at you. “You can say whatever you want, but you know that it’s true. You’ll never find anyone else like me.”

“I know.” You wipe the tears from your face. “And I think that’s for the better. I gave you the world, Sanzu. I did everything for you. For us. And this is what you do? You fuck the first bitch you see at a party?”

“Whatever. You’ll be back soon.”

———

Walking around town with a couple of people, he had the biggest smirk on his face. Kanto Manji gang was already the top gang in Japan and things couldn’t get any better.

“Yo, Sanzu.” Ran slaps his back. “Isn’t that your ex?”

And as he turned around, he saw you talking with your friends. You laughed at something one of them said. He noticed how you were glowing, looking way better than you did during the relationship. And he felt a pang in his chest. You were right, weren’t you? You don’t need someone like him. Sanzu scoffs and pretends like seeing you so happy didn’t hurt.

“Whatever. They’ll be crawling back to me soon.”

Haitani Rindou

I know you mad, you didn't see it my way

“Can you for once just understand how this whole situation makes me feel?!” You yell out frustrated. “Why can’t you just see it from my point of view! You never listen to me. You just do everything your own way and then get mad at me when I try to treat you how you treat me! You’re a fucking hypocrite, Rin.”

“Whatever.” He just rolls his eyes and looks back at his game.

“You’re doing it again! I can’t remember the last time we spent our time together. I shouldn’t even be talking about this with yo-“

“So shut it.”

“Huh?” Your eyes widen.

“Shut the fuck up. You’re so fucking annoying.” Rindou bangs his fist on the table that held his gaming set up. “Always bitching about everything. If you hate how I ignore you so much, why don’t you just leave huh? Fucking dumbass.”

———

That day you did leave. And you never answered his calls or messages. Whenever he tried to talk to you, you would just walk past him, or just switch routes so you wouldn’t even have to see him. You started treating him like he treated you the whole relationship. Rindou knew he fucked up bad and he didn’t know how to get you back.

Hanma Shuji

Since I've been gone, I've been out of space

“You make me so fucking stressed, Shuji.” You sigh as you finish wrapping bandaids over his hands. “You disappear for weeks or months and don’t text, or call. I never know where you are and if you’ll come back. I hate it.”

“Yeah, yeah. Sorry, babe. It won’t happen again. I swear.” He kisses the top of your head.

You knew his words didn’t hold any meaning. He would sweet talk you into staying and then he’d disappear again, leaving you alone with the dark thoughts of what could have happened to him. But for now you’d just stay in his arms.

———

So after he didn’t reach out to you in four months, you decided to just end it there and grabbed your belongings from his apartment. At first it was hard. You’d check your phone for any new messages or calls, but after a while you realised how better you felt after leaving.

Ran Haitani (ft. Mitsuya Takashi)

I let lil' Shawty, come here, take your place

“I can’t believe you. I gave you a chance to change after the first time..” you feel your heart breaking, a lump was forming in your throat and you wanted to scream, to throw whatever was near you into walls. “And you went ahead and cheated on me for the second time?! Do you have no fucking shame, Haitani?” You looked at him and felt your stomach drop. He had a smirk on his face and his eyebrows were raised. Like this whole thing was just a show he was watching on the tv.

“You’re stupid if you think I can and will actually change. It’s not my fault you’re so dependent on me.” He shrugs his shoulders. “If I were you, I would’ve left ages ago.”

———

Ran was walking around Roppongi with Rindou. They wanted to visit a caffe that opened not too far from their apartment. And when they walked in Ran felt his stomach explode and his hands started shaking. There you were sitting in a booth, smiling happily while a guy him and his brother hated, was holding your hand and making you blush. Mitsuya Takashi healed your heart and made you forget about him. Ran couldn’t stand the thought of you belonging to someone else.

You want a paper plane, I don't mind

I wonder why your girl always smiling

Mitsuya felt someone staring at him and as he lifted his eyes, he tried to contain a smile. The Haitani brothers were both staring at you and him. He lifted your hand which he was holding and left a gentle kiss on your wrist. He doesn’t mind giving you the world if it meant you’d smile at him like that. It was Ran’s loss.

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buccini555 · 6 months

Text

𝐇𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬 — 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢 𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬

≡ Them finding out that you ended up hurting yourself because of the way they treat you...

𖥻 H e a d c a n o n s !!

⌕ 𝑭𝒕. Ran & Rindou Haitani

tw: sh

𝐑𝐚𝐧 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢

Although it doesn't seem like it, Ran usually pays a lot of attention to your behavior and especially your mood changes, that morning, you had an argument and as much as he tried to ignore it, deep down, Ran was sincerely worried about you and your absence was directly affecting him.

As soon as he went to talk to you, he noticed how sad you were, and also, even though it is an extremely hot and sunny day, you were wearing a long-sleeved blouse, but in a small oversight on your part, you ended up leaving those still unhealed wounds exposed.

"Let me see your arm, right now." Ran spoke in a few words, in a serious tone almost never used by him, as soon as you finished showing it, Ran looked at you a little shaken, but still, without showing any feelings.

"Who did this to you? Shit... You were the one who did this, weren't you?" He questioned, but soon realized what had really happened, Ran hugged you at the same moment, taking care of your injuries. "I'm sorry about that."

Still hugging you, Ran felt extremely bad knowing that he had caused you so much sadness. "...Don't do that again, I don't want you to get hurt because of me, or for any reason, just, don't do that again." After what happened, Ran began to be more careful with his behavior, also paying more attention to you, Ran double his attention and care so that you don't hurt yourself again.

𝐑𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢

Lately, Rindou had been so absent to the point that you barely saw him, and he often ended up taking out some of his frustrations on you.

That night, Rindou was sincerely willing to apologize to you, so he hurried to talk to you, but he ended up realizing how sad you were, making him feel guilty, this guilt intensified even more when he noticed the injuries in your pulses.

"What happened? What are those marks on your arms?" Holding your arm carefully, Rindou questioned you, even though he already knew the answer, he definitely felt like the worst person in the world at that moment.

"I'm so sorry." At that moment, he just hugged you, remaining silent for a brief moment.

"Promise me you'll never cut yourself again, I don't want to see you hurt and also, I will never treat you badly again, never again..." Rindou couldn't hide how uncomfortable that situation became, for that reason, he just made his apology.

"I'll take better care of you." Gently pulling away from the hug and taking care of your wounds, Rindou said in a low tone, he would really take better care of you.

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