the brainworms are kiiling me. have a dad and son 👍︎

WAIT I SENT THE ASK TOO EARLYA AUWHAUDHDEKDVW

how is the original bone skeleton man doing?? OH OH AND is the setting the usual portal opening in the house and bam you've got new uncles or something else??? YAIOEPEPWLWKWPWBAOAV

buckle up, cuz this is super long yall 🥲

OKAY!!! THIS IS WHERE MY "INTERESTING" PART COMES IN 😁 monsters are just coming to the surface, and speciesism is as high as ever. after a year of this, queen toriel decides to open a human-monster program, something that also promotes her small school.

monsters adopt humans! ebbot was a bit iffy on it, but after realizing the benefits the mayor eventually agreed. (jk that nigga only wants the money 💀-) It was hard to get the program started, because many schools and orphanages werent as trusting, and the state wasn't fundinh it at all. So Toriel took a different approach.

Many monsters put their savings into it, considering their currency is literal fucking gold, and the program would allow each child to get $1000+ per month, depending on their age and needs. and yes giving kids thousands of dollars per year doesn't sound like a good idea, but shhhhh! the plot my dear!

The monsters who take care of them aren't allowed to use it themselves in selfish situations. Both the child and the guardian has rules.

one) you guys have to interact in some way. whether it be verbally, or even physically. two) NOTHING 18+, as all children being minors, that would be kinda weird. three) follow laws as follows- just dont be a shitty parent. four) the child has to want to participate as well, and cant do anything to hurt the guardian. including verbally (bc monster souls are made of feelings pretty much [thats another hc for another day])

id love to go deeper into the details, yet i however cannot bc i dont know how a parent-child program works.

and you have to be in the program for 1 month before you or the child wants to back out.

doesn't matter if its one-sided or not, when someone doesn't like it it immediately stops. id like to say that frisk and papyrus put most if their money into this, just so she can be adopted by toriel.

so when papyrus sees that gaster and sans have been stuck in the lab (not the basement!) for globs of hours at a time, sporadic sleeping, and overall exhaustion from work, he says the craziest shit

"SINCE YOU TWO ARE NERD BUMS, AND I CAN'T ALWAYS BE AT HOME FOR YOU TWO, I ADOPTED A HUMAN CHILD!!"

sans, in his sleep deprived state, promptly rose an eyebrow and fell out of his chair onto his side.

yea, its not that he didn't take the thing well, bro couldn't process it 💀💀

gaster just rolled his only visible eyelight and went back to work

....

well that worked well!!

reader arrived to the house the next day, and seeing that it was a two story house!?!?

AND there was an in-law suite? fuck yea! orphan kid made the jackpot 💥💥😼

they had fuckin steps too les goo!!

Your dark skin shined against the light of the sun, your brown eyes sparkling in excitement.

reader let go of papyrus's hand and ran inside immediately.

Careful as to not smudge your dirty shoes against the shiney floor, you looked around the house in amazement. This place had to have atleast 5 rooms!

and then the in law suite on the side looked like another 2 rooms!?? BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE!!

Not only did you have super nice guardians (you hoped), they were packed enough to keep you and themselves stabilized!! Hell, if theirs more people, they could support them aswell!!

Taking off your shoes, you looked around the living room. The long couch was green, albiet a bit patchy for a nice place, while the tan side couches could lean back!!

where those outlets on the sides? omg

"HAVING FUN DEAR HUMAN CHILD?" Papyrus smirked. He knew that the house of the Great Papyrus was enough to impress anyone, even of young ages.

"You guys are so rich!! wow- i mean, not that im tryna take your money or anything, but like- WOW!! Its so big!! Bigger than anything ive ever been to!" You were now flapping your hands and bouncing a bit. Your locs of hair bounced in it's pony tail no matter how small the fidget-hop was.

Behind the living room was a beautiful and lavish kitchen, and to the right there was the steps. To the right it looked like some like of master bedroom or guest bathroom.

But you didn't care about rooms right now, you wanted to see your other guardians!!

"Where are the other people im supposed to be meeting? Are you my only guardian or do they have to take care of me too? Are they mean? Are they bums? I hope they dont smoke or something, Do they have an addiction? What about-"

"THAT!, DEAR CHILD, IS GOING TO BE FOR INTRODUCTIONS!! DO NOT WORRY, WHILE THOSE TWO MAY BE GRUMPS, THEY ARE PLEASANT PEOPLE TO BE AROUND...EVEN IF THE LACK OF SLEEP TAKES THEIR PLEASANT PERSONALITY AWAY..." Papyrus concluded. You noticed that, despite the way he tried to talk to himself, you still heard it loud and clearly.

Maybe he had a hard time with volume control. meh.

Grabbing your hand and leading you towards the back door next to the kitchen, Papyrus opened the door. He had to lean down a bit in order to hold your hand, but he didn't mind.

The hallway was looooong. Instead of it being regular walls, it was glass windows of different colors. Which made you raise an eyebrow abit.

Seeing your reaction, the tall skeleton explained, "SINCE WE DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH SPACE FOR EXPERIMENTAL ACTIVITY, TOTALLY NOT BOMBS, MY BROTHER AND FATHER DECIDED TO LIVE IN THE SUITE!" He said, walking and talking.

You both reached the end of the hallway, hearing mumblings, ramblings, and overall terms that lowkey hurt your brain.

Getting too excited, you open the door to a glass-based lab. With the occasional plastic and metal equipment.

In the middle of the room there was an island counter filled was rainbow colored stuff ('gay as hell' , you sniggered), small green candies, and lots and lots if paper and pencils sharpened to the ends.

At one end of the room, there was a tall skeleton, a little shorter than Papyrus, who was more goop than skeleton. Infact, he looked like someone took a fire torch to his upper body, but you didn't say anything.

At the other end, there was a short skeleton, probably shorter than you (hah, being 5'0 did pay off), laying with his head on the desk, knocked out with blue slob. You marveled at the sight, wanting to know more about monsters at this revelation.

"FATHER! BROTHER! THIS IS THE CHILD I ADOPTED FOR ALL OF US!" Papyrus announced, grinning undauntedly. The smaller skeleton banged his head on the desk at the loud voice, while the other one barely flinched and turned slowly in irritation. "INTRODUCE YOURSELVES WHILE I MAKE LUNCH FOR THE GROWING FETUS!" He declared, marching out with a big smile.

If this plan went correctly, then his favorite family members would be mentally stable (as much as one could try- he thought to himself).

after banging his head on the damned table, sans sat up a bit disoriented.

why was there a human child in the house?

why was it in the lab?

"uhh kid, ur not supposed be here...uhh, its not safe and uh, you could die."

"WOW! Your so freakin cool! How do you talk without moving your face? Are you wearing a mask? I could die here! ooh shiney stuff, can i touch it?"

yea.. this kid has not had a proper friend in a minute

he was overwhelmed by the questions you asked at first, he didn't answer them at all in favor of watching gaster struggle to calm you down.

sans didn't mind how loud you were, it was moreso the curiosity that you brought along with you.

that wouldn't do.

"Hey! What's this?" the kid asked, walking towards the machine that could very much possibly cause the heat death of the universe, before getting snatched up by gaster.

"Enough! you are here to introduce yourself, and you will do as such" It was funny to see the man twitch like that. sans likes this kid already.

After knowing your name and age, sans was a bit surprised.

he honestly thought you were younger.

while introducing himself he tried to keep it simple and short. how old is he?

"how old am i old man?"

His blue slippers shifted from the movement of his ankle bones.

he thought you were just an average kid, but something about you was different.

oddly enough you always wore these earrings saying Y on the right and N on the left.

he wonder what it meant

Now its a week past since you came into the 'haunted house', aka the skele-dungeon

you two play pranks against gaster when he has free time. watching him bounce his leg in irritation every time he finds a lima bean in his notes is pure gold.

since you're virtual, due to your choice, he tries to take you places.

some of the most consistent ones are dance class every saturday and neighborhood walks you take by yourself.

I think of sans is the type of person to give less of a shit about his dad.

mostly because if the way he approaches things, iN tHE NaME oF sCIeNcE

it pisses him off everytime he tries to ask you for a blood sample

and it makes him even angrier when you say yes without a second thought.

but despite that, he cares about gaster.

but he wants to choke him out being his first son.

Despite being constantly sleep deprived, he makes time for this little new joy in his life.

Back then he's sleep at his desk, especially when his magic reserves were too low to shortcut.

But now, and you thought he didn't notice, you carry him to the living room of the main house and turn the tv volume down to 9 when you cant fall asleep.

another thing you both have in common

More often than not, you both find each other at the odd hours if the night.

since he can barely cook shit, it's mostly you making the midnight snacks

he appreciates the food you make for him, despite him initially coming to get a 10 1/2 ounce bag of chips

other times you guys will sit in the living room in silence

occasionally he'll find himself rambling to you about physics, specifically quantum, so he can keep his memory up.

sans likes the way you treat his brother.

as an uncle and not a childish cousin.

You may not be able to keep up with Papyrus's schedules and puzzles

but when you can, you two shine this wholesome light on the whole house that makes sans's soul ache lovingly.

Papyrus likes to take you out for walks more than him, or you'll both hang out in the backyard next to the glass hallway of the suite.

on his breaks, he'll find you two doing silly things

like rolling in the grass

or trying to carry each other.

without being able to admit it, sans and papyrus feel a new joy in their life.

and they got a cool kid to come with it :)

Gaster and sans were in the lab when his father said the most dumbest shit his nonexistent ears could ever listen to

gaster was never fully succumbed into the void, as sans had saved him before anything totally horrible happened.

hence his melted face and arms.

but he saw something, or rather somethings, that his meticulous little nerd brain has been hyperfiaxting on since the child came.

"Let's discover new universes!"

sans was just like 'naw, jit crazy'

so gaster fucks around with the machine for a while in secret while sans is frolicking with his newly adopted child.

ew, children.

but he guesses that she's okay, despite her adamant queries (hehe).

and soon enough, the machine made that man find out after he fucked around

Now that the machine stopped pouring in different variants of his children, this only made gaster more excited to use the machine.

sans on the other hand was fuckin freaking out.

the damn geezer did it

but not only that, there are aggressive ass versions of him who are willing to kill a child and that wont go.

sans is not gonna give on the things that bring him joy that easy.

*insert battle sequence*

ok so he got his ass whooped, no biggie.

and now his adopted child is befriending them. great.

annnddd now his brother is taking care of them. even better.

AANNNDD now his father is too interested in them to try and find a way to send them back. AMAZING!

bro wants to jump off a roof at this point

to be honest, he doesn't like the other versions of himself.

Theyre different possibilities of what could've happened currently and he already thinks about that enough.

but, reader likes them, so he gives them a pass.

but if they hurt her...or even worse, his brother...

he wont need the machine to figure out a way to take them out of this world.

KITTY!! THANK U SM!!! ✨❤️✨❤️✨🫣❤️🫣❤️ EKKK!! YOU GUYS BRING ME SUCH JOY 😋😋😋 YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYATATATTATATATTATATATATATTATATATTATATATATTATATATA IM SO HAPPY!! YHSHABDGSIWKSBHSUWBWHAISNEGEYGSBAOWOAMQNWHUDBRYDUBJQIBSGATUWOWUEHRBXKMXBSYSJBSBZ-

i know the reader sounds super excited rn, which is sorta unexpected for an orphan centered fic, in the official thing you're gonna see a less than..nice attitude from them.

btw i wanna make a house plan to this can make more sense for your guys. ohhhhhhhh- IM TOO DAMN EXCITED 😋😋💕 i prolly gotta learn skeleton anatomy too-

@kittykittyanon @radicallxser @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl @ziipzeepzop-eez @amorvincitomnia-14 @spongejuice @cyb3r-st4r. if you would like to be added, check my blog. if you would like to be added, check my blog. SEE? I SAID IT TWICE!!

I posted 173 times in 2022

That's 173 more posts than 2021!

64 posts created (37%)

109 posts reblogged (63%)

I tagged 155 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#undertale - 54 posts

#sunsest-art - 41 posts

#reblog - 39 posts

#papyrus - 35 posts

#rottmnt - 24 posts

#art - 23 posts

#sans - 17 posts

#deltarune - 13 posts

#stranger things - 12 posts

#gaster - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#the stranger things fixation has been taking over my life but i still love this au so very much and i plan on continuing it someday :] !!

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Click for quality c: !!

Finally finished this thing!! Hehe

This is my entry for @smarties-art dtiys!! Hope u like it

Haven't posted anything around here lately 'cause I was working on this, but I finally finished it + school is almost over, so more art is coming !!

Also, extra thingy:

See the full post

2,932 notes - Posted May 30, 2022

#4

See the full post

3,416 notes - Posted November 2, 2022

#3

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH WUUU! Here's Mettaton

I plan to make a bunch of utdr art for pride month now that I finally have time to draw hehe

He's so fun to draw ahh

-

4,143 notes - Posted June 2, 2022

#2

Happy Let Papyrus Say Fuck day! again

So, for those that might not know, spanish is my first language so I NEEDED to do this HAHA curse words in spanish sound so intense for no reason hajdhajxh

-

14,832 notes - Posted June 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

YESSSS !! FINALLY !! Let Papyrus Say Fuck dayyyyyy my beloved

-

26,625 notes - Posted June 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

_______

THIS BRINGS BACK SO MANY MEMORIES AHHH

This was my first year ever uploading art and I'm so happy I got sm support !! Thanks everyone

AuraFell InfoDump

Hello! As some of you may already know, I have created my own AU called AuraFell! It doesn't have any Tale/Swap/Swapfell/etc counterparts yet, so this is completely new!

I'm going to dump everything I have to start with this AU below the cut. If you want to wrote or draw this AU please ask, it's still in New AU stages so I want it to be done right! But I'm very easygoing and I would love for more content to me made so don't be afraid (:

More info below the cut, it's a mess of about 7k words so bear with me!

AuraFell:

Let's start with the magic system. Most monsters have the same type of magic as regular AUs, nothing special. If they have an aura, it's weak or hard to use.

Boss Monsters, though, have Auras that are strong and super effective.

Boss monsters in this AU (that ive developed) are:

-Papyrus (Mockingbird)

-Sans (Terror)

-Asgore (Dad)

-Toriel (Auntie)

-Undyne (Shrill)

-Alphys (Professor)

-Mettaton (Signal)

-Grillby (Ozone)

-Frisk (Kiddo)

And the deceased ones with powers thus far:

-Gaster (Doctor...deceased)

-Asriel (Giver...deceased...?)

-Chara (Pal....deceased)

Nicknames! So nicknames are actually given to Boss monsters by the ones their aura effects. They all for some reason call them that name.

Aura powers fall under two categories, with subcategories. If your aura is in the same category, you're resistant to the other's power. If you have the same category AND subcategory, you're immune.

Ambient Auras: These are Auras that are area of effect, sort of. They are focused in one way or another but generally present at all times.

-Visual: This means the Ambient Aura is focused with a visual effect (flashing colors, a friendly smile, the written word)

-Audial: This means the Ambient Aura is focused with sound (humming, singing, spoken word)

Given Aura: This aura type must be administered physically somehow. It is not ever-present but can be "stowed" or "kept". The effect is imbued to an object or physically given somehow.

-Present: This means the Given Effect must be given through an item (a baked good laced with the effect, a gift, etc)

-Physical: This means the given effect must be administered through physical contact (a bite, a kiss, skin to skin contact)

Let's start with the skeleton Brothers' powers

Papyrus, AKA Mockingbird

-His Aura is called Lullaby. He makes people fall asleep. He usually does this by humming or singing. It can effect one person immediately or multiple with a delay. 

-His favorite lullaby to hum is "Hush little baby" (you know. The one where Mama is gonna buy you a Mockingbird...) and perhaps that's why everyone calls him Mockingbird

-He used to think he had no powers because he didn't know how to focus it, and his Category/Subcategory is the same as Sans AND Undyne (whom he spent the most time with) so neither were ever affected

- Category/Sub is Ambient (Audial)

Sans (Terror)

-His aura is called Modify Memory, but nobody knows that. He can speak to a sleeping person and influence their dreams, or speak a story to an woken person and they will legitimately remember that it happened that way. Again, it's most effective when focused on one person, and the details fuzz or change if he tries to stretch it to more people

-He pretends to be affected by Mock's lullaby. He's incredibly fast, agile, and strong, and he pretends he's only a good fighter when he's unconscious. This way nobody will risk a surprise knockout and they'll cooperate with him when Mock threatens to put him to sleep. He modifies people's memories so they will spread by word of mouth that the unconscious fighting is his power, not modify memory

-Category/Sub: Ambient (Audial)

Speed run through the others:

-Toriel (Auntie) makes pies or any baked good that are more addictive than any drug. Category/sub: Given (Present)

-Asgore (Dad) has Big Dad Energy and everyone wants to impress him, to an extreme. He's so strong he affects most of the Underground without knowing it, and to his horror most of the Underground seems to think that murdering others and getting stronger is the way to impress him. He focuses with spoken word but it's mostly unnecessary at this point. Ambient (Audial)

-Grillby (Ozone). Hypnosis. Pretty flame colors. Leaves his victims open to suggestion. Ambient (Visual)

-Muffet (? Nickname tbd) makes a paralyzing poison. She has figured out how to put it in her pastries but it's best delivered by bite. Given (Physical)

-Undyne (Shrill) has the command power. People follow a command from her. Longer instructions if focused on one, one simple instruction if aimed at multiples. Ambient (Audial)

-Alphys (Professor). People take whatever she says as fact as long as it's written in her handwriting. Ambient (Visual)

-Mettaton (Signal). His TV programs are brainwashing propaganda. He can convince people to buy or sell anything if they are watching him through a screen. Ambient (Visual)

-Frisk (Kiddo) radiates friendship with a smile. Ambient (visual)

-Gaster (Doctor) used to be able to say anything and people would believe him. Ambient (Audial)

-Chara (Pal) was able to convince anyone to be friendly to them no matter what they'd done. Ambient (Audial)

-Asriel (Giver) could give you a rock and you'd well up with grateful feelings. Given (Present)

So 

yeah that's the basics, that's the big peeps in that world. Basically it isn't really Asgore's fault the place is so fucked up he's just very old and powerful and the violence is mostly people trying to impress him (poorly).

Gaster is Terror and Mock's Dad but he died when they were young, 8 and barely 2. He died trying to save Asriel and Chara when he accidentally dropped a barrier-breaking theory that Asriel then took as fact because of Gaster's aura.

Toriel moved almost immediately after the children's deaths, and Asgore did his best to raise Terror and Mock until Terror was old enough to take Mock to live in their house in Snowdin (about 14 and 8 years old)

Snowdin is a really bad place now though bc Toriel (Auntie) has been giving away her pies at the ruins gates, and people are killing and hurting each other for enough G or whatever they think she wants to get the next fix. She's kinda lost it at this point, she keeps feeding them out of some twisted need to be needed

Terror was old enough and smart enough to know "yeah, let's not eat that". They're immune to Asgore's power bc they are the same types, but they still want to impress him the normal kid-wants-to-impress-dad amount so they never tell him when they need more support out of some sense of pride. 

Mock was a bit of a runt well into teenage years. His magic was very slow to grow. He got picked on a lot, kids stole his lunch money and roughed him up and such. He would hum his favorite lullabies to himself to calm his anxiety, and wouldn't you know it, but one day it put everyone to sleep!

So sometimes he doesn't even realize he's humming, he does it to calm his nerves, he a nervous bean, but he also  knows from the one time someone injured his socket that earplugs are good enough to slow his effects

He also learns pretty quickly that junkies don't sleep for long and they are way stronger than he anticipated so, he racks up some of his LV for stuff like that.

He also likes tea because his powers depend on him being able to hum/sing

Prince’s Whumptober 2020 masterpost

Gonna have links, titles, summaries, and all that jazz under a readmore because i decided to really push myself and do all 31 prompts separately. Thank you to everyone who liked and reblogged my work; your support means the world to me and makes me want to keep writing! 

multiparters here have been listed in chronological order rather than posting order for ease of reading. 

FAHC

No 1. LET’S HANG OUT SOMETIME Waking Up Restrained | Shackled | Hanging

Title: another duck joins the flock Fandom: FAHC Character(s): Geoff, Michael Rating: T Warning(s): blood, handcuffs Wordcount: 728 Summary: Or how the Fakes gained their most famous muscle. [tidied up/expanded this never-to-be-posted fahc wip for whumptober]

Naruto

No 2. IN THE HANDS OF THE ENEMY “Pick Who Dies” | Collars | Kidnapped

Title: and the worst part of waiting is the anticipation Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Team 7 Rating: T Warning(s): blood, vomit Wordcount: 951 Summary: Team Seven gets captured. [part of the whumptober au]

No 3. MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY Manhandled | Forced to their Knees | Held at Gunpoint

Title: A Teaching Moment Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Sakura, Kabuto Rating: T Warning(s): none Wordcount: 498 Summary: Kabuto makes her an offer she can’t refuse. [part of the whumptober au]

No 29. I THINK I NEED A DOCTOR Intubation | Emergency Room | Reluctant Bedrest

Title: Graduation Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Sakura, Kabuto, Rating: T+? Warning(s): blood Wordcount: 835 Summary: Kabuto has one more test before Sakura can be considered a true medic-nin. [part of the whumptober au]

No 15. INTO THE UNKNOWN Possession | Magical Healing | Science Gone Wrong

Title: Arboreal Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Sakura Rating: T Warning(s): needles Wordcount: 803 Summary: It was only a matter of time before Sakura found something that could help her escape. [part of the whumptober au]

No 9. FOR THE GREATER GOOD “Take Me Instead” | “Run!” | Ritual Sacrifice

Title: no good deed goes unpunished Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Naruto, Teuchi, Kyuubi Rating: T Warning(s): violence against children Wordcount: 972 Summary: Something goes wrong on his seventh birthday. Naruto might never be the same again.

No 26. IF YOU THOUGHT THE HEAD TRAUMA WAS BAD… Migraine | Concussion | Blindness

Title: Degradation Fandom: Naruto Character(s): Kakashi, Sakura, Naruto Rating: T Warning(s): dismemberment ment Wordcount: 187 Summary: Kakashi knows that power comes with a price.

Dragon Age

No 6. PLEASE…. “Get it Out” | No More | “Stop, please”

Title: Like Dogs Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Tabris, Shianni, Soris, Nelaros Rating: M Warning(s): implied/offscreen rape, violence against women, blood Wordcount: 1640 Summary: It was supposed to be a good thing, getting married. It wasn’t. [this is really just a love letter to the origin that fucking shooketh me]

No 19. BROKEN HEARTS Grief | Mourning Loved One | Survivor’s Guilt

Title: all’s fair but war is not without casualties Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s)/Pairing(s): Female Cousland, Alistair; ex-Alistair/Warden Rating: T Warning(s): none Wordcount: 695 Summary: Ten years after the Blight ends, Elissa Cousland runs into someone she never thought she’d see again. It, uh, doesn’t go quite as planned. [mostly canon compliant; Loghain is spared and becomes a warden]

No 11. PSYCH 101 Defiance | Struggling | Crying

Title: Duty Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Cousland, Eleanor, Bryce Rating: T Warning(s): blood, betrayal, last stand Wordcount: 633 Summary: Even without interference, history marches on. A what-if scenario if Duncan wasn’t there to recruit the Cousland. [part of iron & ash]

No 23. WHAT’S A WHUMPEE GOTTA DO TO GET SOME SLEEP AROUND HERE? Exhaustion | Narcolepsy | Sleep Deprivation

Title: To Ostagar Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Cousland Rating: T Warning(s): none Wordcount: 545 Summary: Jasmine is determined to get vengeance for her family. [part of iron & ash]

No 14. IS SOMETHING BURNING? Branding | Heat Exhaustion | Fire

Title: Consequences Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Surana Rating: T Warning(s): none Wordcount: 368 Summary: Surana helps her best friend escape the Circle, and the consequences are more than she bargained for.

No 21. I DON’T FEEL SO WELL Chronic Pain | Hypothermia | Infection

Title: Corrupted Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Mahariel, Duncan Rating: Gen Warning(s): none Wordcount: 192 Summary: It’s a long journey from the Brecilian Forest to Ostagar for someone with blight sickness.

No 31. TODAY’S SPECIAL: TORTURE Experiment | Whipped | Left for Dead

Title: Big Sister Instinct Fandom: Dragon Age Character(s): Female Hawke, Unnamed Templars Rating: T Warning(s): torture, violence against women Wordcount: 325 Summary: Marian Hawke would rather die than betray her family. She might even just get the chance to do it.

Mass Effect

No 4. RUNNING OUT OF TIME Caged | Buried Alive | Collapsed Building

Title: never forget to bury your regret (before it buries you) Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Male Shepard, Human OC Rating: T Warning(s): cave-in, blood, character death Wordcount: 450 Summary: Survival training goes south in the ICT.

No 7. I’VE GOT YOU Support | Carrying | Enemy to Caretaker

Title: First Contact Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Turian OC, Human OC Rating: T Warning(s): injuries, broken bones, vomit, vehicular crash Wordcount: 1150 Summary: Decimus isn’t ready to die, but he’s especially not ready to die on a stupid scouting mission to a stupid alien colony. [set during the First Contact War; probably not canon-compliant but idgaf]

No 18. PANIC! AT THE DISCO Panic Attacks | Phobias | Paranoia

Title: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger (and what does makes you scarred forever) Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard, Edi, Tali’Zorah, Garrus Vakarian Rating: T Warning(s): panic attack, open space Wordcount: 662 Summary: Shepard isn’t afraid of getting spaced. No, really. [a closer look at the geth dreadnought mission]

No 28. SUCH WOW. MANY NORMAL. VERY OOPS. Accidents | Hunting Season | Mugged

Title: Torfan Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard, Major Kyle Rating: T Warning(s): blood, guns, drugging Wordcount: 589 Summary: How the Butcher came to be.

No 25. I THINK I’LL JUST COLLAPSE RIGHT HERE, THANKS Disorientation | Blurred Vision | Ringing Ears

Title: Rest Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s)/Pairing(s): Female Shepard, Anderson; referenced Shepard/Vega Rating: T Warning(s): blood, character death Wordcount: 1018 Summary: A father-daughter moment after they open the arms of the Citadel. [part of Alder]

No 5. WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING? On the Run | Failed Escape | Rescue

Title: they found you on the floor Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard Rating: T Warning(s): alcohol, vomit, underage drinking Wordcount: 348 Summary: Like mother like daughter; Shepard deals with her trauma after Mindoir. [part of Gloria Shepard]

No 22. DO THESE TACOS TASTE FUNNY TO YOU? Poisoned | Drugged | Withdrawal

Title: there’s easier ways to die Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard, Ashley Williams Rating: T Warning(s): DTs, vomit mention Wordcount: 368 Summary: Shepard takes a stand against her own demons. [part of Gloria Shepard]

No 17. I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING Blackmail | Dirty Secret | Wrongfully Accused

Title: you crawled up on your cross Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard, Jacob Taylor Rating: T Warning(s): alcohol Wordcount: 645 Summary: Shepard gets a morale boost from a crewmate. [part of Gloria Shepard]

No 16. A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY Forced to Beg | Hallucinations | Shoot the Hostage

Title: Cornered Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Garrus, Female Shepard Rating: T Warning(s): broken bones Wordcount: 1281 Summary: Garrus gets into some trouble. [part of the omega non-reaper au]

No 20. TOTO, I HAVE A FEELING WE’RE NOT IN KANSAS ANYMORE Lost | Field Medicine | Medieval

Title: Ancient History Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Female Shepard, Garrus Rating: T Warning(s): injuries, death, self-destructive/suicidal actions Wordcount: 1223 Summary: Jane is an enigma and Garrus just wants to figure her out. [part of the omega non-reaper au]

No 8. WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO? “Don’t Say Goodbye” | Abandoned | Isolation

Title: After Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s): Garrus, Female Shepard Rating: T Warning(s): injuries, death Wordcount: 440 Summary: Jane comes for Garrus after the gangs’ assault. [part of the omega non-reaper au]

No 30. NOW WHERE DID THAT COME FROM? Wound Reveal | Ignoring an Injury | Internal Organ Injury

Title: Debt Fandom: Mass Effect Character(s)/Pairing(s): Garrus, Female Shepard, Mordin; mutual pining Shakarian Rating: T Warning(s): painkillers Wordcount: 590 Summary: After the gangs’ assault, Garrus overhears something. [part of the omega non-reaper au]

Undertale

No 13. BREATHE IN BREATHE OUT Delayed Drowning | Chemical Pneumonia | Oxygen Mask

Title: Drowning Fandom: Undertale Character(s): Toriel, Asgore Rating: T Warning(s): character death, child death Wordcount: 156 Summary: Asriel brought Chara home one last time.

[replacing no. 27] Alt 7. Found Family

Title: The Door Fandom: Undertale Character(s): Frisk, Papyrus, Sans Rating: Gen Warning(s): none Wordcount: 357 Summary: Just a little look at what could be a meeting with Gaster

Red vs Blue

No 12. I THINK I’VE BROKEN SOMETHING Broken Down | Broken Bones | Broken Trust

Title: Being a twin is a Hard Thing Fandom: Red vs Blue Character(s): South Dakota Rating: T Warning(s): psychological trauma Wordcount: 281 Summary: In the days before Wash finds them, South gets… introspective. [canon compliant? taken from a wip I was never going to finish so I fleshed it out for whumptober instead]

Original Fiction

No 10. THEY LOOK SO PRETTY WHEN THEY BLEED Blood Loss | Internal Bleeding | Trail of Blood

Title: please leave a message Rating: T Warning(s): blood Wordcount: 537 Summary: A detective’s work is never done. Antonia deals with the news that her most famous case’s subject is on the run again. [original fiction]

No 24. YOU’RE NOT MAKING ANY SENSE Forced Mutism | Blindfolded | Sensory Deprivation

Title: Secondary Location Rating: Gen? Warning(s): kidnapping Wordcount: 143 Summary: Antonia wakes up on the wrong side of the city. [original fiction]

This is a (sort of) fanfic for that one comic where gaster is very mean by the artist whose name starts with Z

More or less an extended version of this. Warning for vague discussion of abuse and trauma.

StrongFish91 likes a post from 20XX:

(pic of Alphys)

W. D. Gaster likes this.

———

Papyrus: HEY ALPHYS

I DIDNT KNOW YOU KNEW THE OLD ROYAL SCIENTIST?

Alphys: ……yeah i did :/

i had NO idea what he was doing, he never told anyone anything

im so sorry you can unfriend me if you want x.x

Papyrus: IT’S FINE

I JUST NEVER KNEW HE HAD UNDERNET

HE DIDNT SEEM LIKE A VERY SOCIAL MONSTER

Alphys: he wasn’t really???

i helped him set up his profile actually

so we could chat more easily and stuff

he didn’t use it a lot… just commented on other people’s posts

are you mad at me? im really sorry

Papyrus: NO

THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME THIS

———

CoolSkeleton95 updated status: Taking a break from UN for now.

ALPHYS commented: hope youre doing ok ^^

StrongFish91 commented: Come back soon punk!!!! OR whenever you’re ready.  I’ll text you!!!!

———

Sans: hey i saw your UN post?

u doin ok?

Papyrus: yeah

Just need to take a break

Sans: okay

is anything going on?

Papyrus: No.

sans: lmao sure

Papyrus: Just leave it Sans.

I’m sorry. That was rude.

Sans: it’s fine just

you kind of… always say that when you’re upset

and I try to help and you get mad at me

so can you be honest with me pls

?

Papyrus: I don’t want to get into an argument.

sans: ….oh

so it’s about /him/?

…did you turn off your phone

welp

screw you too then I guess

———

sans: so im never gonna have kids but if russ ever has them im gonna use my brotherly authority to make their middle names foo bar and baz

sans: thats a programming joke

sans: al please clap alphys: ASJKFHKAJHSDKJ

sans: thanks for the pity al.

alphys: NO ITS GOOD

alphys: how is papyrus anyway? saw he’s taking a break from undernet sans: not talking to me lol

sans: i think he’ll be ok its probably just old stuff

alphys: yeah……

alphys: so please dont be mad but

alphys: he saw some of my old UN posts that your dad liked

alphys: and he asked me about them today so maybe thats whats bothering him?

alphys: im sorry i never told you but we used to be friends sort of. well he was my boss and i thought he was cool i swear i didnt know what kind of person he really was until after he died

alphys: ill delete all those posts he liked. i just feel so bad i hope papyrus is ok

alphys: are you ok?

alphys: are you still there? fuck im so sorry

sans: im still here. dont worry about it

sans: i was looking up his profile. looks like a cool guy lol

sans: kinda reminds me of papyrus and me

alphys: NO youre nothing like him!

sans: gtg im gonna talk to papyrus.

sans: im not mad at you

alphys: ok take care….. <3

———

dear papyrus,

writing this on paper because im 99% sure you turned off your phone.  but i know you’re in your room.  i saw you let the dog in.  you dont have to talk to me right now but please at least read this.

alphys told me about what happened earlier. i looked at his profile too. i saw his comments. alphys said she thought he was cool and i sorta get why, if he talked and acted like you.

but youre not like him. youd never hurt someone on purpose. youre not arrogant and youre not cruel.

honestly, im more like him than you are. he used to say that all the time. he said i’d understand why he did all that to us one day. must have been a real idiot if he thought i understood him better than you did.

im gonna shove this under your door.  ill be in my room when youre ready to talk. or you can text me.

love, sans (corny but true)

————

papyrus: Thanks for the letter.

papyrus: Please don’t think of yourself that way.  You’re not like him at all.

sans: oh dang that was fast. thought you wouldn’t talk to me for at least another day lol

papyrus: Can we just drop this for now?

sans: sure thing.

sans: youre not mad at alphys are you? she means well

papyrus: I’m not mad. But I also don’t want to talk about this anymore.

papyrus: And I just sent you a letter.

sans: awwww for me?

papyrus: You can keep it if you want.

sans: ...

sans: you can have it

------

My name is Papyrus.  I am a skeleton who lives in Snowdin with my brother, Sans.

Sans and I were created and raised by W. D. Gaster.  He used us for experiments with magic.  He died when we were still young.

Gaster and I have some things in common.

He used all-caps while typing, like I do.  He would focus on small pursuits for long periods of time without breaks, just like I get absorbed in my puzzles.  Many people liked him.

This does not mean that we are exactly the same.  I would never do what he did.

Gaster also had some things in common with Sans.  They both loved mathematics and physics.  Both of them often felt depressed.  Many people loved and supported Gaster, and many people love and support Sans.

Gaster thought they were the same, but they could never be the same.  Sans is too kind, too compassionate, to be anything like Gaster.  Even when we fight, it’s clear how much he cares about me.

We are better people than Gaster ever was.  And we can help each other be even better if we support and love each other.

Love, Papyrus

(P.S. Sans I didn’t write this for you at first, but I want you to see it.) (P.P.S. I’ll start writing in all-caps again eventually.)

Chapter 5: Was there any point in trying?

In which you wonder if this was a good idea. 

*Toriel's POV*

I put on the best dress I could find and perfumed myself with a gift that Lauren gave me. She has been too nice since we arrived on the Surface. I think I should give her a present!

...once all of this is over.

(Y/N) said yesterday that everything was fine and that the president only wanted to discuss the terms of our freedom. Let's just hope that is true.

Therefore, Asgore and I will attend a meeting with the president and, of course, (Y/N). She's been such a sweetheart with us, always supportive and encouraging. I would love to have her as a friend; she is just wonderful!

I was about to leave the house when I felt my daughter's hand tugging my sleeve.

"Mom, why can't we go?"

I felt how my heart slowly sank, knowing that my child wants to know everything about this. Such a caring, loving girl. She'll be a great woman.

"Oh, my dear, (Y/N) said that only Asgore and I should go. But worry not! You have your friends here to entertain yourself!"

"But, mom... they're as worried as I am"

I looked into the living room and realized that Frisk was right. Sans's smile was fading slowly, Arial's expression was as concerned as her first day on her new job, Undyne was probably waiting for an explanation, and so on. Even Papyrus seemed a little bit shaky for all of this.

"I promise that everything is going to be ok, my child. Now be a good girl, and behave yourself in front of Richard and Lauren"

"Yes, mom..." She pouted, seeing there was no point in complaining with her mother. I sighed and left the house, Asgore nervously waiting for me. Oh dear...

"Sha-shall we go, To-tori?"

"Don't 'Tori' me, Asgore"

"M-my apologies..."

And then we started our uncomfortable way to our meeting, trying our best to not break down.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Your POV*

Suit? Yep.

Makeup? Yep.

Tie? Yep.

Perfume? Please don't put more of that thing.

I nervously sighed and looked at my watch, then at myself. Did I put little effort or too much on my outfit? Do I have enough makeup? Is it exaggerated? Should I have put my hair up in a bun instead of keeping it down? Should I have left my glasses at home?

My mind's been teasing me way too much ever since Mailey left the café, minutes after I ended my call with Asgore. I'm probably going to fuck up all my effort.

Why am I even tryi-

"Hello, Miss (L/N)" a tall and recognized man greeted, a neutral look on his face. I snapped immediately back to reality and extended my hand.

"Good morning, Mr. President" I answered, keeping my cool "Please take a seat. The rulers of the Underground should be here in a few minutes"

"Wonderful. Do you have tea, by any chance?"

What?

"...sure! Which type do you like?"

"Goldenflower tea would be excellent- if you have, of course"

Oh, so now his questioning me?! What a jerk!

"Uh, yes I do, sir. It's one of the King's favorites, actually"

"Really? Hmm. Now I want to meet him more..."

I put the teapot over a small table I had and started to make the tea. I don't think I'm that bad making it, so maybe I have a chance. And just when I was serving him a cup in silence, a knock was heard on the door.

Good thing I have more teacups.

"Come in!"

Mr. and Mrs. Dreemurr entered softly in the room, immediately greeting the man. Of course he goes first, right? Eh, I shouldn't be thinking this way. 'Cause, after all, they indeed greeted me with a bigger smile.

I smiled to myself and grabbed two cups of tea on the main desk, then I returned for the other two.

And just like that, we started.

This is going to be a long day.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Sans's POV* (oh boy)

This is gonna be a long day

The kid's been way more annoying than ever, poking everyone with desperation and trying to find the perfect game to entertain us. What a wimp.

Everyone's nervous, yes, but we have to hold on. Honestly, though, I already gave up hope. We are definitely going back to the Underground. It was just a matter of time. Oh well, the Surface was... something while it lasted.

I should text (Y/N) a message and thank her for giving us a slight spark of hope. Besides, from one of the few kind humans that tried to help us. She really shouldn't have wasted her time on us. We were a lost cause since the very beginning.

And now, it will hurt more. Because we had a chance to feel the sun and to see the stars, but that will be just a memory from now on. It hurts. It really does.

I just wished I could have really enjoyed my time here so far. Because I probably didn't. Mostly because I got to be with my parents way more than I did before in my whole life.

Paps has tried his best to keep me happy, but it's just not that easy, y' know? We have our history together, and it's not the best. Especially with my father, Gaster, and how perfect he wants me to be.

But I'm Sans. A fucked-up young skeleton that feels old. A comedian for everyone, an asshole for myself.

Arial, my mother, was washing dishes over and over, hoping nobody noticed. But I bet everyone did. I guess that's her way to deal with anxiety, huh? She's probably inexperienced with this feeling. How... fortunate.

I, myself, have dealt with this since I was a kid. Therefore, while everyone was trying to distract themselves, I was just laying on the couch with a lazy grin. I'm just that experienced.

I must admit I'm not that relaxed, though. Ever since Toriel and Asgore explained what was going on, I wasn't able to focus on my reading. And it's a science fiction book, so it's really weird. It's eating me up 'cause, well,  the kid could reset again.

And I'm not letting it happen...

again.

I groaned, feeling useless than usual. I've been promising myself that I won't let it happen again; ever since Flowey, even, 'cause he had that ability before the kid came.

Those two little freaks have ruined my life. Well, them and my parents. But that's another story.

Alphys started to think negatively, just like me. The difference was that she did it out loud.

"Alphys! Don't think that way!" Frisk exclaimed, visibly angry.

"Hey! You just don't shout at MY girlfriend!" Undyne roared, angrier than Frisk "If you want to discuss something, THEN SAY IT TO ME FIRST!"

Aaaaaaand the fight began... shit.

Paps, being the kind monster he is, intervened in the fight between his friends. Alphys tried to calm Undyne, while Frisk just kept being a sassy prick.

Oh kid, if only Tori knew.

Flowey groaned at first but ended up supporting Frisk, just because she was about to punch Alphys. Arial grew worried and tried her best to keep Papyrus out of it.

But she couldn't. It doesn't surprise me one bit.

Gaster just silently watched. I bet he is mentally smirking at this point.

That fucking jerk.

Mettaton walked away from it some two good miles, avoiding any bruise that would affect his disgusting reputation. Napstablook... he just cried in silence. He is such a huge mood. I wonder if he knows that.

Then Undyne pushed Paps hard. Like, REALLY hard.

And no one, and I mean no one, touches my FUCKING BROTHER.

"hey! watch your goddamn moves!" I shouted, losing my cool completely. Way to go, Sans.

"Make me" She dared, with a stupid smile on her face. Oh, it's on.

...

I ended up having a fistfight with Undyne, throwing her on the floor and punching her face like if my life depended on it.

I just couldn't think straight. My mind went blank, and my left eye switched between blue and yellow. Again.

Arial tried to pull me away, and again, she failed. I glanced at Gaster briefly and saw a hint of hate on his face. Disappointment, anger, and shame. Ashamed of his own son. Oh, I hate this guy so much, I could do the same to him as I did to Undyne...

...

And I did.

I balanced towards him, shouting things like "stop looking at me like that!" or "what's your fucking problem?!". Undyne wasn't unconscious nor near to being, and that just made me angrier. I wanted to grab Papyrus, burn the house, then continue with my life.

Then I saw something I didn't want to- or well, someone...

Emily. Emily was still there, watching in horror.

Shit.

I suddenly stopped, realizing my mistake. Everyone had a hint of surprise and horror on their faces. Everyone, except Frisk and Flowey.

They have seen me like this before.

And now, everyone has.

Now they know something I didn't want them to know.

I fucked up.

"emily, kid... i'm sorry" I muttered, feeling like a mess. "thank you for everything, by the way. it was great while it lasted".

Then, before I could hear her response, I teleported to my room, which wasn't even my own.

And I broke down.

I just fucked up way more than I thought.

No one will think of me as the same.

Not even Paps.

My life is ruined.

I would beg for a reset, but the kid and the weed would remember anyway.

They're gonna make my life fucking hell.

I continued crying and laughing, knowing that now no one out there would help me.

That, after all, I hadn't had any hope left.

And it hurts.

It really does.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Your POV*

We ended up with a shake of hands, and when the president left the room, we three hugged happily.

We did it.

It was actually quite easier than I thought. I must thank all those people who fought racism and discrimination back in the past. Without them, this wouldn't have happened.

We reasoned peacefully with him, and he promised he would let all the country know the news: Monsters have now legal rights.

Maybe people won't accept them easily, but hey, they're legal citizens now! I was so happy I could have cried.

...

And I did.

And they did, too.

We were just that happy we could finally get rid of this.

However, they needed an ambassador: someone who could represent them.

Therefore...

"(Y/N), dear, I think you should be our ambassador!" Mrs. Dreemurr happily exclaimed between sobs, and I just froze.

Ambassador? C'mon (Y/N), you know you can't do it! Besid-

"Yes, young one! You deserve it!" Asgore added, letting more tears down his fluffy fur.

Wait, do they really want me to be the one? To have this honor? ME?!?!

"I, uh..."

I couldn't think straightly. My mind went blank, my vision blurrier, and my heart sank. And, without thinking, I finally agreed.

"I'll be your ambassador. I, (Y/N) (L/N), will represent you all!"

And with that, we hugged again, making me the happiest girl on the Earth.

It feels good...

It really does.

Underfell: File Name not Edgy Enough #17

Chapter 17: Inconvenience WARNING: I WANT NO RESPONSIBILITY OVER SPOILING THINGS FOR OTHERS. THAT BEING SAID, THIS IS HOW FILE NAME NOT FOUND WOULD FUNCTION IN THE AU OF UNDERFELL. BEFORE YOU READ THIS, UNLIKE THE NICE TIME OF UNDERTALE, THIS WORLD IS KILL OR BE KILLED. THIS STORY WILL BE GRAPHIC, GORY, USE SWEARS LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, AND DEAL WITH SENSITIVE SUBJECT MATTERS. FOR EXAMPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE READ THE FILE NAME RELOCATED SPOOF WILL KNOW HOW I PICTURE THIS VERSION OF LYNSIE COMING TO THE UNDERGROUND. IT IS NOT AN ACCIDENT. IT IS NOT BECAUSE OF SOMETHING DUMB. IT IS BECAUSE SHE CHOOSES TO END HER LIFE. SO TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. I MADE IT BECAUSE I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THIS EDGINESS OUT OF MYSELF. WHICH I GUESS MAKES UNDERFELL LYNSIE EVEN MORE TRUE TO WHO I REALLY AM. ANYWAY, ENJOY. ^_^ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Time behind the bar ain't that bad. Grillby is a very patient man in his teaching of me. There are drinks that every bartender, and now barmaid, should know that are put into different categories. Sours, Fizzes, Lowballs, Three-parters, and Milk Drinks. Sours contain citrus juice, should be tart or at least tangy and are usually shaken in a cocktail shaker and served straight up. Freshly squeezed juices are critical here, often paired with simple syrup (sugar dissolved in an equal volume of water) to sweeten. Fizzes include anything with bubbles such as highballs, Champagne cocktails, Collinses, mules, bucks. These drinks can be incredibly simple and are clearly the most refreshing. Plus it is not difficult to keep a few six-packs of sodas and 750s of basic booze in your liquor cabinet. With Lowballs, these old school short cocktails are simply sweetened liquor zipped up with something bitter. The sweet can come from sugar, muddled with fruit or simmered into syrup, or a sweeter liqueur like triple sec or maraschino. The bitter can be a few dashes of any of a vast variety of bottled bitters, or a bitter spirit like an amaro. Three-parters are harder as these drinks are the most spirit-forward of the collection, a three-part combo of booze plus what's known as a "modifier" (a lower-alcohol ingredient like vermouth) plus a bitter or a syrup. Here we find drinks like the martini, Manhattan, Brooklyn, Negroni, boulevardier, Rob Roy and all of their bold and boozy cousins. Milk Drinks are like an odd member of this liquor family. Milk can be paired with beer, cider, wine, and spirits. It's weird but then again I'm not an expert that likes liquor. With that aside, there are ten basic drinks that are always ordered here. The Old Fashioned, Negroni, Daiquiri, Manhattan, Whiskey Sour, Dry Martini, Margarita, Moscow Mule, Mojito, and Sazerac. The Old Fashioned was the one Grillby had me make for Papyrus and it's one of those old drinks that never goes out of style but can be made with either bourbon or rye whiskey. Such changes apply to many drinks and this variety is how two drinks, even if they are the same in name, are never the same in taste. But the Old Fashioned is one of those drinks that takes some time to save in your memory due to its steps. Grillby at least keeps my starter training to the drinks with simple steps. Such as the Negroni which only needs three things to make it, 1 oz. London dry gin, 1 oz. Campari, and 1 oz. vermouth rosso. Another easy one, which the ladies tend to go for, is the Dry Martini which is made with 4 oz. gin or vodka and 1 oz. dry vermouth that is typically topped with an olive as a garnish. Grillby limits me to just two of these drinks to learn so that by repetitively making them they have a better chance of being remembered in my brain. Not a bad plan really. Then he plans on testing me the next day to see if I do recall how to make them before he tries teaching me any of the other ones. Yet other than that, I do the normal things a cocktail waitress would do, bringing drinks to patrons and making sure that they get their grub. All in all, not that bad of a job really. I could get used to this. It also helps that my new boss is a flaming sweetheart in a world of douche bags that is as fun to tease gently. "Oh, pussycat...Doggo's steak is ready." "On it, Grillmeister." "Don't forget to..." "Check if drinks and snacks need refilling." "That too. But I was going to say, don't forget to empty out his ashtray." "He needs to smoke his biscuits outside. Damn things stink. Besides, you're already smoking...hot." Grillby merely chuckles as I go about my duties. From the times when Sans and I are in the bar, I notice that Grillby has a certain mood when it comes to puns. If they are in good taste, flirty, or flattering, he's okay with them. But negative, hurtful, or just plain bad ones get him rather perturbed. "well don't you look busy..." Speak of the skeleton and he shall appear. "trying to make yourself look good for paps?" "As if. I take it it's your break time. My how time flies fast for the wingless." "what can i say? my bones are pretty hollow. perfect for flight." I wave my hand in a side to side wave. "A bit of a stretch with that one." He rubs the back of his skull as he approaches his bar stool. "yeah, not my best wordplay." Grillby pulls out a mustard bottle. "Rough day?" Sans takes it. "you can say that. i'm just...having an off day." "Want to talk about it?" Sans seems to mull this over before bringing the bottle to his mouth. "some other time maybe...though..." He gulps the condiment a few times. "if i can borrow her for a moment?" Grillby and I share odd looks of confused concern, but I give him a nod to which Grillby does as well. "Do you want a booth or somewhere less...occupied?" "here's fine." Grillby waves me over as I finish catering to Doggo and take the seat next to Sans. "Everything okay?" Sans stares off into nothing while drinking. "i've been thinking a lot today." I prop my arm on the bar and support my head in the palm of my hand. "What about? Normal stuff? Or...secret buddy stuff?" After a particularly long swig of mustard, Sans puts the bottle down and his left eye flares with a magical glow. Suddenly, the bar goes dark except for a spotlight of light on the two of us and looking around shows that everyone in the dark has frozen still as if someone paused a movie. "i can't do this for long. takes a lot of magic to stop time like this." Wait, what?! "You can stop time? Dude! That is fucking epic!" And just like that, I'm a five-year-old seeing a shark for the first time. "Is it all over or just in the bar?" "the bar. now please..." His tone is calm but holds a seriousness that I pick up on over my silly childishness. "Sorry. You wanted to talk now?" He toys with the bottle a bit. "for starters...how come you don't look at me or pap when you come back from seeing gaster?" I pout and cast my eyes to the floor. "I don't mean for it to be insulting. But after dealing with what Gaster does to me, I honestly can't bring myself to look at either of you until I've calmed down." "how come?" "Because...I can see him when I look at your faces. Like how if you stare into a light then look away, the image still lingers in your vision. It probably doesn't help that there's a family relation thing too. But after being in the void...being experimented on for god knows how long...His face remains in my sight for some time. The part that really messes with me is Papyrus...He...He resembles Gaster even on the good days." I rub my eyes trying to make them clear and Sans takes another drink. "yeah, pap and dings take after our old man in the looks department. me? i got my devilishly handsome mug from mommy dearest." Something clicks in my head that hadn't before. "You have parents?" He snorts an amused chuckle. "well duh. how else do ya think we came about? it's not like we were just thought up and poof there's a baby skeleton." "I know. I had a brain fart moment. It's just...Forgive me if I'm overstepping...But while in your home, I never saw anything showing a family memory of any sort." His eyes go dark for a moment except for the left that still holds it's glow. "we keep that stuff elsewhere in our past." A bad feeling squeezes my heart. "They...They fell down, didn't they?" He remains silent for a long time. I mentally kick myself for this. This is a scar I should not touch. "what happened in the void last night?" He speaks. At least that's something. I sigh, giving the fainting bruises on my arms a passing glance. "I requested his help in finding a way to control or suppress the Black Soul. As you can see...He has a very hands-on approach." A short weak laugh comes from that small pun. "are ya sure that's a good thing to do?" I glare at the foggy memory of what happened in that dead timeline. I wasn't in control but I saw things through a blurry dark window. So much hate. Such blood lust. That thing was less than human. A beast. "If going through the pain of his experiments is what is needed to make that THING go away and to prevent any of THAT from happening again...I think it's worth it." He breathes slowly for a bit. "just...be careful around him. gaster is like a, what do you humans call it...a wolf in sheep's clothing? he'll offer what you need, but not because he cares or anything. he does it because it helps him in the long run. if he sees something he can gain, he will do what is needed to get it." "I figured as much." That got him to look at me. "you know?" "No good deed is ever done 100% out of good intentions in this world we live in. Gaster is less than subtle with his wants. He wants to study my soul, that's his goal. I'm okay with it because my goal is being done in his little fun time. I'm using him just as much as he's using me. Simple as that." Sans shakes his head. "you're dealing with a devil that you can't possibly understand." I shrug. "Sacrifices must be made to keep any more death from happening. I am willing to be that lamb on the alter if needed." "i didn't take you for the martyr type." I turn my head to look at Grillby, standing still as he was in mid-pour from one of the taps. "I am many things. I am a fool. I am a human. I am sad. I am flawed. I am not supposed to be here. But here I am. And I refuse to be a beast that kills without hesitation or remorse. I don't want that event to ever happen again. That is my promise to all in the Underground. No one will die. I won't allow it." Sans eyes me before scoffing. This bugs me. "Did I say something weird to you?" "you can't keep anyone from dying down here." "The hell I can't." "okay...so what'll you do if someone just died in waterfall?" I sneer. "I can't do anything in that situation. One, I'm not God and lack omnipresence to know what's happening everywhere at all times. And two, you are the only one that can teleport." "exactly. you are not god. you can't stop things from happening. sure, you can tap into that quirky RESET thing, but it's not going to stop events that will still happen without you there. you are just an insignificant speck among countless other specks. your intent can be good, but in the end, is pointless." "Wow...Someone woke up on the bleak side of the mattress today." "i'm just being real. we all die. you. me. everyone in this room. all things on this planet. all of it will die one day. maybe not today. maybe not tomorrow. but someday." "Dude, have you been hanging out with my depression? Because I swear I've heard that before." "don't be a smart ass." "At least I have one." He growls at me as I smirk. "What's wrong? Was that too cheeky of me?" He clenches his teeth to hold in a laugh. "Butt...enough jokes. You still look like something is troubling you. And you might as well say it before your magic runs out on this freeze frame in time." He guzzles the bottle and brings it down rather hard. "ya wanna know what's on my mind? alright...tell me...what would you do if ya found out a monster had a thing for you?" Well, that escalated quickly out of nowhere. I can feel warmth pool in my cheeks and my mouth forms into a goofy dumb smile. "Why, Sans, I had no idea you cared." I know he didn't mean himself. But he's been so serious that I couldn't help but try to rattle him out of it. And boy did it rattle him good. His skull practically glows in crimson blush and the mustard bottle in his grip is squeezed to hell. He tries to form words to negate this but all that leaves him are these sounds of broken stumblings that aren't quite words or noise but a strange mix of the two. I end this for his sake. "Relax, buddy. I'm just messing with you. I know you don't like me like that. Hell, I'm pretty sure you see me as an abomination." His left eye starts twitching in building rage. But I continue as I let my free hand's fingers dance on the bar. "Though to answer your question...I'd be flattered really." That seems to surprise him and dispels his anger. "really?" "Yeah." "...why?" I close my eyes in thought. "I am not an expert when it comes to things like this. Matters of the heart and all that jazz. If I'm honest here...I like guys, but I've never really been one to actively seek out others. Heh...I'll let you in on a secret that's not so secret. Papyrus isn't the only one to never be on a date. And if you knew of how messed up human guys were you'd agree that it's smart not to do so. I can't say some monster guys are any different from those schmucks, but others..." I smile while opening my eyes. "The good ones leave a mark that I can't help but like." "is grillby one of those 'good ones'?" Hmmm...Me thinks he is trying to make a point here. Should I take the bait or dance around it? "My good sir, whatever do you mean?" Guess I'm dancing. And he is not happy about it. "cut the crap. i remember what happened when he was dying. i remember the kiss." "And?" "and?! ya can't just say and!" "Why not? I don't see what the big deal is. So we kissed. What's the issue?" "because!" I sigh and put a stop to the dance. "Why not just tell me what's really bugging you instead of trying to shoehorn it in like you're a dad trying to get me to admit to sneaking off with the local bad boy to make out in his car." He suddenly grabs me by the collar of my shirt and snarls in my face. "do not fuck with me! if you hurt my friend i swear to whatever fucked up god that'll listen, i will end you! i will unleash pain the likes of which..." "Hold it! You think I'd hurt Grillby?" My confused tone takes some of that anger down a bit. "...you're not stringing him along?" I put my hands up defensively. "Sans, buddy, why would I do that? Grillby is like the only guy/monster to be genuinely nice to me. I'd have to be a massive cunt to do that." "how do i know you're not lying?" "Would a heartless bitch cry over the guy she was using?" I slowly put my hands on his. "Look...I know this is weird. Hell, I'm still figuring things out on my end too. But since being down here I've learned one important thing...happiness is hard to find. So why not try to find it with someone that is wanting to do the same and actually likes me?" He sees I make a point but is still wary of me. "do you like him?" I cast my eyes at Grillby. "I do. But it's a small like. I guess in level terms it's a small crush. But what can one really expect with limited contact? As we hang out more, who knows. Maybe that level will increase to something stronger or this thing we have will never change. Only time will tell." "ya do know that if anyone finds out that you're human they'll kill him for treason, right?" That squeezing feeling happens on my heart again. This time it's more a harsh pain than dread. "You think I'm going to announce myself as human? That was the problem in the dead timeline. I have no intention of repeating that. Never again." He stares at me hard and I notice the glow in his left eye starting to flicker out. I let his hands go as his magic sputters to its end and the light expands to fill the bar, resuming time once more for those on the inside. Seeing this, Sans lets me go before anyone questions the odd scene that came out of nowhere for them. "glad we could have this talk." "Yeah. We should do it again sometime." Grillby eyes us as Sans places a small amount of gold on the bar. "oh, before i forget...pap has this idea that you're up to some cockamamie evil plan to lull us into a false sense of security." A snicker leaves me. "What? Why?" "personally, i think it's 'cause ya act nice in the morning and night. throws him off when he knows ya for being a bitch." "Yeah, I can see that. But he's just being paranoid. I'm more nice at those times because no one wants to deal with shit when the day starts or ends." "i hear that." Sans hops off his stool and I do the same. "Leaving so soon, Sans?" If only you knew, Grillby. "ya know how my bro gets. he gets all pissy if i'm away for even a second." Sans looks at me and for a moment I can't get a read off his skull. "you...be good, lynsie." A warm smile curls my lips. "It's messed up how I want to hug you right now." He shakes his head. "just like that, ya killed the moment." He walks off towards the door. "later, kiddo." A chuckle scoffs out of me. "Later, bonehead." He flips me off as he exits and all I do is smirk. "What a dork...But in a good way." "Things okay there, pussycat?" I give my flaming boss of a bartender a goofy thumbs up. "Things be swell, boss-man." I catch a glimpse of myself in the reflection of Grillby's glasses and I blush a little bit. "Geez, is that what I look like? No wonder Papyrus is suspicious of me. Heh...Barely recognized myself for a second." Grillby slides the drink he was pouring to Ugly Fish with a knowing smirk. "Seems like you're the one letting your guard down." "As dumb as it sounds, how can I not when I feel so comfortable here?" I stroll my dorky self back behind the bar and grab a dry rag to do some dish work. "It also helps if there's a warm someone that makes me smile every so often." I get to my tidying task and try not to notice Grillby inching his way closer as he goes about doing other things. "These smiles you speak of..." He's at the beer taps. "Would they be real ones..." He's by the wine rack. "Or ones made to give off the impression of happiness?" He's standing in front of where Sans and I were sitting. "As if you were wearing a mask maybe?" He's gotten beside me now and I slow down in my task. "...I say personal things when drunk, don't I?" "No, not really. But you're incredibly honest when tipsy that's for sure." I scold myself for being so weak. "Not to mention you're a bold one too..." Drunk Bun blurts out while looming out of her booth. "Took some real courage to kiss ol' Grillby there. But look at the luck you got. Now you have a cushy gig and spicy sugar daddy to play with. Girl power at it's finest." A bad taste coats my tongue as my stomach churns. I think I'm going to be sick. Grillby takes note of this distress when I nearly drop a mug in my trembling hands. He tries to settle my nerves with a hand on my shoulder. "Don't listen to her. You know that's not how things are." It's not working. I know she's wrong. But that's not to say the whole bar isn't thinking the same thing. That I'm using Grillby. Hell, even Sans thought I was. Why? Why is it hard to just be happy for once? "This was a mistake..." He flinches and I put my things down. "I'm sorry for troubling you." "Pussycat...?" I go to walk away but he blocks me. "Where do you think you're going?" "Home." "No. You're staying here." "I'm not staying." "Yes, you are." "I'm not staying in a place where everyone thinks I'm a whore!" "But you're not a whore!" "I know that!" "Then why are you getting upset?!" "I don't know! I just want to leave so no one has to see me...*quietly* cry..." I wipe my eyes on my sleeve and he frowns at me. "Go inside and rest. We'll talk later when you're feeling better." I feel like a snot-nosed kid about to yell for their lost parents. With what little dignity I have left, I just nod my head and he lets me pass to enter his home. Though once that door is closed behind me I have a hard time holding this back. I suppress any sound until I'm at least in the living room, but once there, I'm a mess. It's really annoying having to cry. Once the water starts going it's hard to make it stop. And odder still, you get used to it then want to cry more when it begins to stop. Shit is weird. I hope Grillby doesn't get mad at me for this. Making a sad nasty mess out of one of his sofa cushions. But I'm compelled to do it. To hold it in my arms as if I were holding someone else. This instinctual need to have contact, even if imaginary, just to feel some sort of comfort when feeling so low. Back on the surface, I'd simulate this by putting one of my jackets on a pillow and wrap the sleeves around my neck. Argh! I hate being so fucking weak! This shit shouldn't be getting to me! Since when do I give a shit about what others think of me?! This isn't right! Fuck this stupid soul for making me feel these stupid things! Ugh...I need to be coaxed down from this shit! I've gotta call Toriel. Her mothering is actually something I could use right now. That and a hug. I could so go for a hug right now! [RING] "Hello?" "*sniffling* Nanny..." "Lynsie, my child, are you all right?" "*crying* I was weak...My guard was down...Something stupid got under my skin and now...I can't make the tears stop." "Do you wish me to sing to you?" "*sniffles* Yes please..." As babying as it is, something about Toriel soothingly singing to me settles me down when I'm upset. "♪Cry if you want to. I won't tell you not to. I won't try to cheer you up, I'll just be here if you want me...There's no use in keeping a stiff upper lip, you can weep you can sleep you can loosen your grip. You can frown, you can drown and go down with the ship. You can cry if you want to. Don't ever apologize for venting your pain, it's something to me you don't need to explain. I don't need to know why I don't think you're insane. You can cry if you want to.♫" Toriel knows many songs, some from the past and others from human things that fell down here. This one, "Cry If You Want To" by Karen Drucker, is from my iPod's 'feel better' playlist. She's a nosy mom. "♪The windows are closed the neighbors aren't home if it's better with me then to do it alone. I'll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone. You can cry if you want to...You can start at the ceiling, tear at your hair, swallow your feelings and stagger and swear. You can show things, and throw things and I wouldn't care. You can cry if you want to...No I won't make fun of you. I won't tell anyone. I won't analyze what you do or you should have done. I won't advise you to go and have fun. You can cry if you want to.♫" My breathing is calmer and my grip on the sofa cushion is less harsh. She's good at this. "♪The windows are closed the neighbors aren't home if it's better with me then to do it alone. I'll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone. So you can cry...When it's empty and ugly and terribly sad, I can't feel what you feel but I know it feels bad. I know that it's real and it makes you so mad. That you could cry. Cry if you want to. I won't tell you not to. I won't try to cheer you up, I'll just be here if you want me to be near you.♫" The tears have stopped before her last note and god knows how much I miss being around her. "My child? You are silent now. Are you feeling any better?" I wipe my face. "I miss you. I miss you, mom." "I miss you too. Do you know if you are able to come home?" "Sans would probably help with that, but Papyrus doesn't leave me unsupervised, and now I have a job working at Grillby's that I don't want to fail at..." "Grillby's?" "It's a pub in Snowdin Town that they leave me in while they work." "...They leave my child in a bar for hours at a time?" "It's fine. Sans stops by regularly to keep an eye on me. And the owner is...nice." "Oh? This proprietor is treating you well?" "That would be Grillby, and yeah. You may remember me calling him a trouble maker for eavesdropping on one of our last phone calls. He's...without sounding like a huge dork...a great guy." "You sound like you are quite taken by him." "Heh...He has a way of warming his way into the heart." "Hmmmm..." "I think you'd like him. The man knows his way around a kitchen. I can totally picture the two of you sharing recipes and stuff. Maybe even an embarrassing story or two about me." "I am not sure how to take you talking him up like this." "I see where this is going, but I'm going to stop you before you say anything else...No. Grillby is not my boyfriend. We, at the most, have a mutual interest in each other. Whether this seed sprouts anything or remains sleeping in the soil is up to time. So, please...Try not to get all overprotective about it." "My child, if the man can not stand being burned than he has no place being near our kitchen." "Well he's made of fire so, I think he's fine with increasing temperatures." She snickers a bit off. "Darn. I will have to think of another means of keeping him in line then." I sigh. "What did I just ask you not to do? Would it help if you were able to talk to him?" "...It might." "I don't know when he'll go on break next but he'll come to check on me soon. He gave me a break when I had my break down." "Hmmm...Maybe there are some monsters with good left in them after all." That's what I was trying to...Calm down, she's just a bit messed up, it's normal. "Glad to hear you're willing to try." "So you will be calling me back within the hour?" "Depends on when he chooses to go on break. He runs the bar solo and me breaking down instead of aiding him doesn't help. Heh...Some first day huh?" "My child, you are a strong and trusting girl. You see the potential in others. You have hope that they will use that potential. You must also harden yourself for when those do not do so." "I know. I don't know what's gotten into me lately. My emotions have been out of whack. One moment I'm normal, tough as nails and with skin so thick that negativity bounces off like dust bunnies. The next moment I'm a weak wimpy mess, getting weepy over the stupidest and lamest of reasons." "Maybe this Grillby is allowing the softer emotions of a proper young lady come out?" "Nah. I blame my soul. Since being out here, two more odd colors showed themselves." "Two more?" "Yeah. Now there's pink and white. Ever since they appeared, this emotional flux has been happening. It's annoying the crap out of me. I'm not in control over how I want to feel anymore." "Welcome to being a woman, my child." That got a laugh out of me. "Good one, Nanny." "While this talk has been nice, my child, I must end it. I am slowly simmering some vegetables for a stew." "Ah...Not your super veggie stew. That's my fave." "Shame then that I have no one else to share it with." "No fair. I can't teleport." "Maybe if you are lucky, I will have some ready and be able to give it to Sans." "No with my luck as if late. Still, thank you, Nanny. You're the best." "*giggles* Take care, my child." "Laters, Mom." [CLICK] I sigh and shut my eyes, letting a small wave of calm wash over me. I needed that. I needed to hear her. I needed to feel like there was a parent I could talk to. Heh...So this is what having a mom feels like? I like it. [RING-RING] The phone goes off in my hand. Maybe Toriel forgot to mention something or perhaps Napstablook wants to share some tunes? I flip it open and see an unknown number. Who the hell knows this number? "Hello?" "HELLO THERE, DARLING~. TIS I, THE ALWAYS FABULOUS AND EVER DELIGHTFUL, METTATON! " And I thought Papyrus had an ego. Mettaton? How the fuck did he...Oh, wait... "You traced the number, didn't you?" Robotic giggles are my answer. "MY, AREN'T YOU THE CLEVER ONE." "Not to sound rude but...Why are you calling me? And if this is for TV I'm hanging up." "NO, NO, NO CAMERAS OR RECORDINGS GOING ON, I ASSURE YOU. THIS IS JUST A SIMPLE CALL ON MY PART BEING DONE IN MY PRIVATE TIME." That didn't sound weird at all...not. "Then what do I owe the honor of a celebrity giving lowly me a moment of your time?" "OH SUCH LOVELY WORDS. THE NICEST I'VE HEARD IN AGES. WELL...I HAVE A FEW QUESTIONS. I AM AN ADMIRE OF YOUR KIND AND I FIND YOU PARTICULARLY INTERESTING, TO SAY THE LEAST." I rub the bridge of my nose. "I suppose I too have a few for you as well. We could go back and forth if that's okay with you?" "SO GENEROUS. THAT'S A VERY ATTRACTIVE QUALITY. BUT TO START THINGS OFF...HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT I KNEW YOU WHERE ON THE PHONE WITH ME THE OTHER DAY?" Oh because I lived through your show before and died but no big deal. "Your show made no sense and was out of character. You were clearly reaching out for something. You created a situation that any normal person in the Underground would be okay with, killing someone deemed guilty. But you weren't looking to be called by a monster...you wanted me. The human that shows mercy." "HEHEHEHEH...YOU REALLY ARE SOMETHING ELSE. I LOVE IT. YES, DARLING, YOU SAW RIGHT THROUGH THE WHOLE THING. I APPLAUD YOU." "Now my turn...How did you find out about me?" "DEAR, YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO YOUR SURROUNDINGS. I WON'T SAY WHERE OR HOW MANY, BUT THERE ARE SECURITY CAMERAS PLACED FROM OUTSIDE THE RUINS ALL ALONG THE PATH LEADING TO SNOWDIN TOWN." My eye twitches. "What?" "OH YES. BUT NO WORRIES, DEAR. THOSE CAMERAS ARE NOT FOR TELEVISION PURPOSES. THEY ARE SOLELY FOR THE DETECTION OF HUMANS. IT'S HOW I'VE BEEN MONITORING YOUR PROGRESS." Great, just what I need, another guy watching over me that I can't do shit about. "BUT LIKE I SAID, THE CAMERAS ONLY ARE ON THE PATH TO TOWN FROM THE RUINS. THERE ARE SADLY NONE IN THE TOWN ITSELF." "That's something at least." "CAMERA SHY? HOW ADORABLE." "You sound so different off-screen." One of my inner thoughts became voiced. "...HOW SO?" Okay, he's not miffed about it. Maybe I can chat with him like normal. "In shows, you come off like everybody else. But this...You seem more at ease. Comfortable. Nice." There's a pause on his end for a bit. "I believe it's your turn." "OH...HUH...MIGHT I GET A TAD PERSONAL WITH THE QUESTIONS?" "Does that question count as your turn?" "NO." "Then...Maybe. Nothing too personal. I don't know you aside from the TV personality." "THAT CAN CHANGE, DARLING~. I AM MORE THAN DELIGHTED IN SHARING ALL THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT MYSELF WITH YOU." Thank god this phone can't do pictures. Because this suddenly is giving me creepy vibes that don't need visual aids. "AS FOR MY QUESTION...WHAT ARE THOSE SKELETONS DOING WITH YOU? LAST THING I SAW OF YOU WAS THAT TALL ONE CARRIED YOU OFF AFTER SMALLER ONE RAN TO YOU ON THE FAKE BRIDGE." "Why so interested?" "I ASKED MY QUESTION FIRST, DARLING." I'm a house bitch to guys that half the time can't tell if they want me dead or not. "I'm a pet." ...Why would you let me say that, brain?! "A PET?" "Yeah? Kind of? It's complicated in a completely humiliating way that I'm not really at liberty to discuss." "BUT A PET? REALLY?" "I know. But hey, it beats being killed for my soul." "IF I HAD FOUND YOU, YOU WOULD NOT BE A PET." "Oh?" "A RARE GEM LIKE YOU SHOULD BE TREASURED. I WOULD..." "Gonna cut you off there. Don't. Just, don't." "I BEG YOUR PARDON?" "You're being cliché. I'm not a fan of clichés. And you were about to ring the oldest cliché bell." "I ASSURE YOU THAT IS NOT THE CASE." "Let me take a stab at what you were going to say...*ahem* A rare gem like you should be treasured. I would tend to your every desire. You'd be a queen. My queen. Nothing is beyond my power if it meant I'd be with you...That come any close to where you were going?" "...I WILL ADMIT TO ABOUT 5% OF THAT BEING ON THE NOSE. THE REST I FIND GOOD ENOUGH TO USE IN A SCRIPT FOR LATER." "I watch a lot of anime so when I feel a yandere vibe I tend to try to avoid it." "YANDERE?" "How do I put it? I guess you can define it as strongly and deeply infatuated, head-over-heels, obsessed, or love-struck but without really feeling the true emotion yet believing that you do. In anime and other things that use this type of character, it's usually a girl that starts out being genuinely kind, loving, or gentle, but suddenly switches to being aggressive, twisted, or deranged, often homicidal when things don't go with how they plan out their little 'love story'." "OOOH...YES, I'VE SEEN MANY OF THOSE TYPES IN ALPHY'S ANIMES. I THINK SHE HAS A THING FOR IT." "Alphys...? The name sounds familiar." "SHE'S THE ROYAL SCIENTIST." "Oh yeah. I forgot about that." "YOU HEARD OF HER?" "Small talk from the skele-bros. Not much else." "SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT. I HEAR THEY DON'T REALLY CARE FOR HER. NOT MANY DO." "She's that bad?" "DEPENDS ON WHAT END OF THE SYRINGE YOU'RE ON." Well, that's not cool. Suddenly a faint beeping is heard on his end. "OH SHOOT!" "Something wrong?" "MY TIMER IS GOING OFF. I'M AFRAID I HAVE TO END THIS PLEASANT CONVERSATION, DARLING. I CAN'T KEEP MY OBNOXIOUS FANS WAITING." "The show must go on as they say." "I LOOK FORWARD TO TALKING WITH YOU AGAIN, DEAR. IT'S SO HARD TO FIND SOMEONE TO HAVE A DECENT CONVERSATION WITH THAT DOESN'T SWEAR EVERY FIVE WORDS." "Same. We should do this again sometime. Heh...If I can be honest, I was feeling like crap till this. It's nice to get lost in talk and forget about life for a while." "THE SOONER YOU CAN COME TO HOTLAND THEN THE BETTER. I THINK WE COULD USE EACH OTHER TO GET THROUGH THIS LIFE A LOT EASIER." "Not sure if I can. As you can guess, as a human, I'm on lockdown from really going anywhere." "AND THAT'S A PROBLEM BECAUSE...?" There's that vibe again. "Don't do whatever it is you're thinking about." "SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU. *FAKE STATIC* LOSING CONNECTION...*FAKE STATIC* SEE YOU SOON~." [CLICK] I glare at nothing and close the phone. "I'm gonna be abducted, I just know it. *sigh* Where is Liam Neeson when you need him?" Better get back to Grillby. I hate leaving him hanging because of some stupid emotional bullshit. But first...Make a backup plan in case of Mettaton creepiness. I reopen the phone and hit up my buddy. [RING-RING] "hello?" "Yo, Blooky. It's me." "L-Lynsie? is something wrong?" "Kind of. I just got a weird phone call and was hoping you'd keep on alert in case of something happening." "what happened?" "Mettaton called me." His side goes eerily quiet. "He is planning things. Doing things that are to get my attention. I believe his next course of action will either mean I'll be taken to Hotland or he may force me to travel there by threatening to expose my humanity. I wanted to inform you because I trust you, Blook-man. I have faith in you to help me when the time comes." Still, he's silent. "Napstablook?" "...he's always been like this." "What?" "...there's something I've been keeping to myself. no one else knows this. can you keep it a secret?" "Buddy, dude, this is me we're talking about. Nothing you tell me will ever leave me without a hell of a fight...or super torture. I'm only human after all." "*nervous* okay...*gulp* you see...Mettaton...he's my cousin." "...Ghost boy say what now?" "I know...it's his most secret of secrets. no one else knows except for that Alphys woman. she's the one that tempted him away with the promise of a 'perfect body'. damn bitch...we ghosts long for bodies. they allow us to feel alive again. but finding something that connects with us is easier said than done." Something clicks in my head. It was a while ago, but that moment stayed fresh due to how sad it was. "*cries* why did you go? you told me you wouldn't leave me behind...you said family sticks together...so why? why did you leave me all alone?!" Now it makes sense. Mettaton left him all alone and, based on how cherry Mettaton is now, he's not very concerned about breaking his promise to Napstablook. No wonder this poor spook hides away in the Ruins, home reminds of too much that he has no one. I need to help him. I want to fix this. "Napstablook..." "yeah?" "I'm getting that feeling when I'm gonna do something that might get me in trouble." "dare I ask what that dumb thing is?" "I'm thinking of running over to Waterfall and finding you so I can give you a hug that's been on hold for what feels like weeks but not really sure on how long." "...okay, that was kind of sweet. but for real, do not do that." "But if I did..." "please don't." "But if I did...What would be the fastest way that avoids being killed? Hypothetically speaking that is." "you're not listening to a thing I'm saying." "I am too." He sighs loudly with annoyed exhaustion. "can't believe the things you can make me do...I am only saying this because of Mettaton and I don't want something crazy to happen." "You're awesome, Blook-man." "just let me say this before I end up regretting it more than I already do." "Sorry." "see...there is a transport between Snowdin, Waterfall, and Hotland. if you take it, it will drop you off literally right outside from where my house is." I feel slightly pissed off about that. "Wait...So I could've been over there days ago? What the fuck, man?" "you told me not to get involved so I didn't say anything." I slap myself. "what was that?" "Realization hitting my face in the form of my hand. *groan* I'm my own worst enemy sometimes." "Lynsie...just please don't try to use it. if the royal guard is really keeping you and not turning you in, then running away is just going to piss them off." "I know, I know. I'm not going to do it. At least...Not as impulsively as I kind of feel like doing. I'm going to think things through before acting. Make a plan and all that jazz." "look at that. you're learning." "I try." "that's something, I guess." A sudden sound gets my attention. A door shutting. Better wrap this up. "I have to go, Blooky." "everything okay?" "Just life going on. I'll call again later." "alright. be careful, Lynsie." [CLICK] I quickly tuck the phone back in my pocket as Grillby's glow comes into view just a bit before he does. "Pussycat...?" "Hey there, boss. Sorry I'm doing so bad at this." He sighs with relief. "You're fine. I'm just glad to see you're feeling better." I get up and stretch. "Don't know what's up with my emotions lately. I've been so sensitive these last few days. It's freaking pissing me off really." "I might have a theory on why that is." "R-Really?" He waves me over and I oblige. "Remember when I told you about soul surges and how it's very typical of in monsters going through puberty?" No...Don't tell me something super humiliating and dumb is happening to me. Please, man, don't! "Y-Yeah?" "Well...When a monster goes through puberty, it's more than just their body, their magic does too. The soul begins to produce stronger magic and in higher quantities than in youth." "Grillz, please, don't tell me I'm going the 'change' again. Human puberty sucked enough to live through." He simply shrugs. "Again, it's just my guess. But based on what you told me, how your soul is getting used to being around magic and turning on old things in your DNA, it's likely that you are." I groan loudly and claw at my face. "It would explain the mood swings and sensitivity." I hate my life so much right now. "How long does this magic puberty last?" "Honestly? It varies from person to person. Could be weeks or even months. It all depends on how fast your soul takes to mature." My groan is even louder. "This is so much bullshit!" "Are you really telling me your 'mother' didn't tell you any of this?" I laugh at the idea of Toriel tell me about anything that sounds like I'm growing up. "Heheh...Nope. She told me nothing. She sees me as her 'child' and 'young one'. I would bet so much gold on her hiding any knowledge of the very concept of me 'maturing'." He smirks. "Sounds like she's not one to allow the birds to leave the nest so to speak." "Yeah. It's why she has me call her so often a day. But I don't mind. She has a bad history that she doesn't talk about, so...She's afraid the same mistake will happen again so she tries to prevent change." "That's understandable." "She also would like to have chat with you." That catches him off guard. "With me? Why?" I smirk. "Oh, no reason really. She just wants to get to know the nice guy that's letting me work in his lovely establishment. But no worries. Toriel is more intimidating than harmful." His eyes widen boldly. "T-Toriel? Your mother...the one down here...is the Queen?" I merely shrug. "So it would seem, my good man. Yet while she's Queen to you, all I see is my silly overprotective mum that can flip faster than a greasy light switch." I haven't seen much negative emotion on Grillby, just once and that was anger. But this? His breathing increases rapidly and his flames spark nervously. Is he having a panic attack? "Grillby?" "Don't make me talk to her!" Yep, this cool hot head is freaking out. "No one is making you do anything. So please, chill before you roast me. You're pumping out heat like a furnace." He fiddles around with his outfit, keeping his hands busy as a means to distract some part of his mind from the frightful thoughts it holds. "I...I can't believe it..." "What's that, boss?" "I can't believe I surged to the Queen's daughter." I blush with a smirk. "Ow. You wound me. You make it sound like a bad thing." He flinches and waves his hands in a small defensive panic. "N-No! No! I didn't mean it like that." I pat his shoulder. "Relax, Grillz. I'm only goofing." He sighs and leans on me. "You're going to be like this the whole time your soul is maturing, aren't you?" "Maybe." "..." "Grillby?" I feel his mouth press to my forehead. "Why are all the best people just a little bit crazy?" My mind blanks for a second. "Are...Are you really asking me or saying a rhetorical question?" He chuckles and moves off me. "Come, pussycat. There is still more to teach you before the clock times out." What just happened? Why was that funny? I'm so confused. "Sure, boss." I follow him back out into the bar and the few glances the patrons give me are either of fear or annoyance. I know not what Grillby did when I fled, but whatever it was, others are not liking this favoritism he's giving me. This instills a new mini-goal in my head. Keep this soul/emotion shit under control and do not bring attention to myself for the remainder of my time here. God, my life sucks. [Many hours later] "PICK UP THE PACE, SANS. DON'T THINK I CAN'T RECOGNIZE WHEN YOU START DRAGGING YOUR FEET." "geez, boss, ya sound like you actually wanna go there more than i do." "PLEASE. I MERELY WISH TO GET THIS DAY OVER WITH. IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT WE MUST STOP THERE BEFORE WE CAN GO HOME." "yep. ain't life funny that way?" In all honesty, Sans wasn't looking forward to returning to the bar despite his joking attitude. The human was slowly making him want to keep away by just being there. Sure, confronting her about Grillby was a start and seeing those eyes of hers go from green to amber as her words got stronger. Made it hard not to believe those words. It's not like she wasn't right in the things she said. She wasn't using Grillby and, next to Sans himself, felt the most hurt seeing the barkeep dust away. Still, he didn't like it. He didn't like how nice they were to each other. He didn't like the flirting. He didn't like that they were closer than any monster and human should. It made him feel weird. And he hated feeling it. Papyrus opens the door to the pub and, aside from the faces that clearly fear or resent him, is met with a slightly warm welcome by the human. This facade does not fool the wise skeleton, no, not in the least. She may have his brother under the illusion of harmlessness, but not him. Just looking at her aroused all sorts of suspicion. If she was capable of breaking into their home than that's enough to have her thought of being capable of doing anything else. "That time already, gentlemen?" The fire elemental's pleasantries are cast aside by the larger brother. "SKIP THE FALSE CARE ACT, GRILLBY. YOU KNOW WHY I BOTHER COMING HERE." "Clearly not for the service." Snidely remarks the human while sweeping around the dog's poker table. "NO ONE ASKED YOU!" "but in a way, yes. we're taking your 'help', grillz." Grillby sighs. "Yeah, I know. Time to punch out, pussycat." She raises her brow playfully. "But I thought hitting was against the rules?" The bartender chuckles. "See you tomorrow, pussycat." She brings the broom behind the bar, shakes Grillby's hand, and moves to wait by the front door. "I SEE YOU HAVE IMPROVED HER LISTENING ABILITY." "She's not a pet, Papyrus." "I DISAGREE. BUT WHATEVER." "What is it that you want?" "WELL? HOW WAS SHE?" "Isn't that why you had Sans watch?" "DON'T BE DIFFICULT AND JUST SAY YOUR PEACE ALREADY." Grillby glares with a slight rumble. "Don't be a dick, Papyrus!" The human was butting in more than the skeleton liked. "IF YOU BARK ONE MORE TIME, I SWEAR, I SHALL THROW YOUR ASS OUT THAT WINDOW! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME, BITCH?!" She waves Papyrus off dismissively and he snarls angrily. "Lynsie has been a source of great aid. I doubt you believe me, given how much you seem to dislike her. But maybe that's just because you feel inadequate about being able to handle her." Sans's sockets widen as the bar pretty much goes stunned and Papyrus is less than happy. "WHAT DID YOU JUST...?" "You're a smart man, Papyrus. But you lack skills to deal with people. More to the point...Skills with dealing with women." "I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW, MY PEOPLE SKILLS ARE..." "Poor as shit!" "BITCH, DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE!" "i think you're making his point, bro." "DON'T YOU START WITH ME, SANS." "To be fair, you do have to forgive pussycat for some of her words and behavior." "LIKE HELL I DO." "how come?" Grillby removes his glasses and huffs on them before wiping then putting them back on. "I had a little chat with her in private and we came to learn something. And since you boys are housing her, I think you should know about this." He waves the brothers in closer and they reluctantly oblige. "*hushed* Her soul is in the processes of maturing. Being down here is jump-starting her body's natural magic production. So she's a tad sensitive till it's over." Papyrus finds himself blushing whereas Sans is on the verge of a giggle fit. "*snickering* can you repeat that?" "Don't be a dick, Sans. No one goes through this well. Not even us." "*snickering* this is just too rich...i fucking love it." "SO...WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS...SHE'S VULNERABLE?" The grin on Papyrus has Grillby immediately regrets opening his mouth. "Forgive me, pussycat!" She looks puzzled before her eyes widen and her cheeks burn a flaring crimson in flustered realization. "You told them?!" "Lynsie, please..." She fumes, baring her teeth and seething into a chilling agitated calm. "You will pay dearly for this." She slams the door as she storms out and Grillby cringes with thoughts of the unknowns a moody woman is willing to unleash on him. One idea, in particular, makes the man of flame shiver with cold. "we should go after her." "DAMN, WOMAN. ALWAYS SUCH A PAIN." Papyrus follows the brooding human and Sans attempts to do the same, but Grillby's hand on his shoulder stops him. "huh?" "Sans...We need to talk." Sans blinks with uncertainty but nods slightly. "uh...sure." Sans sits down at the bar and orders a drink. This is going to take some time. "so...what do ya want to talk about? " Grillby looks uncomfortable and makes his voice low. "Sans...Do you know who is hurting her?" To that, the skeleton smirked. "you need to be a bit more specific than that." Grillby did not take this answer well. His hands slap the bar harshly, threatening to sear the gloss off the wood. "I am not playing around. I saw the bruises. Who is hurting her?" Mirth leaves Sans's skull as he drinks deep from his bottle of yellow condiment. "you wouldn't believe me even if i told you who it was." "Try me." Sans sighs, his fingers tap along the bottle. "let's just say...someone from my past has come back and taken an interest in her." Grillby doesn't like this either. But before he can voice his concerns Sans speaks up. "before you say it, no. his interest in her isn't the same as yours." Grillby's eyes widen a bit and his professional demeanor falters. "W-What? I don't know what you're talking about." Sans rolls his eyes. "look, it's kinda painfully obvious the two of you have this 'thing' with each other. and, if i'm being honest, i don't like it." "Sans..." "but...*huff* i ain't gonna be that asshole that gets involved in his buddy's private life. so...whatever." The barman smiles softly. "Thanks." "yeah, yeah, it's not like i care or some shit. just warning ya before you do something moronic by trying to get with her. bitches be crazy." That earns the skeleton a few dirty looks from the women in the bar, though some of the guys agree. "If that's the case...Are you willing to help me smooth things over with her?" Sans snorts a laugh that almost has the mustard shoot out his nasal opening. "are ya nuts? no way. you're the one that put your foot in your mouth." "She's not the kind of girl to try to get even, is she?" Sans could see this was making Grillby squirm. Part of him found it hilarious. The other part was starting to get hungry and knew Papyrus would be pissed if he wasn't there for dinner. Better get this over with soon. "don't know. but is she is, i'm willing to bet she wouldn't do anything spiteful or malicious. kid's all bark and weak bite. it's gonna get her killed one of these days." Grillby sighs with relief yet recalls something left unanswered. "This 'person from your past'...?" "i'm gonna stop ya right there." Sans downs the remains of the bottle with gusto. "i'm handling it. that's about all i'm at liberty to say. heh...i don't want her pissed at me too for saying things she tells me." To that Grillby felt odd. Of course Sans would know things no one else would about the human. She lives at his house and is easier to get along with than his brother. Still, a small ember of envy burns in him for knowing of this. What things could she have shared with Sans yet not him? How much trust would he need to earn for her to have that much faith in him as well? Sans is a lucky man indeed. "well...i better get going. pap might not handle her new moodiness well if on his own." "Wait! One last question." "okay. what is it?" "Do...Do I have anything to worry about with her 'mother'?" The question and Grillby's nervousness are random but interesting to Sans. "she's told you about her old lady?" Gribbly merely nods. "in my opinion...ya got nothing to worry about. she never leaves the ruins. though...i can't say she won't break that self-enforced rule if something were to happen to her kid. know what i mean?" Grillby nods again as Sans hops off his stool and puts down a small amount of gold. However... "You're short, Sans." Oddly enough, that made the skeleton snarl. "i ain't fucking short!" He really wasn't, 5'4" isn't what most would call short. But when living in a town where just about everyone, including your younger brother but not counting kids and slimes for obvious reasons, is over six feet, it's no surprise it leaves a pretty big chip on your shoulder. If anything, the only thing short about Sans was his temper when called that. Though that too was short lived when met with Grillby's annoyed glare. "I meant the amount, Sans." Nervous chuckles leave the bonehead. "right, my bad. it's all i got on me." To make his point, he pulls the empty insides of his pockets out and small lint bits fall. Grillby shakes his head disapprovingly. "hey, no need for that look. you know i'm good for it. just put it on my tab." A perturbed groan leaves the barman as Sans makes his leave. One of these days Grillby is going to call that tab in full and both men will be sorry. [Meanwhile: Sans & Papyrus's house] Papyrus didn't have far to go to catch up with the human. She was making a beeline for the house and seemed to know he was following since left the door open for him to enter when she kicked it in. What harsh reprimanding he was going to roar at her died in his nonexistent throat when he caught the full strength of her icy glare as she headed for the stairs. "Do not start with..." She pauses to take a shaky breath. "I'm sorry. I am not myself. Please allow me to calm down before I end up doing something regrettable." Oh, how he wanted nothing more than to get in her face and pummel her face into the floor till it was nothing more than a stain on the floor. There were only two reasons he wasn't going to do that for. One, he didn't feel like wasting time cleaning bloody bits out of the carpet. And two, if what Grillby said is true, then her odd behavior as of late was more understandable. The Ruins were said to be abandoned or in the least home to a few monsters that couldn't take being around the majority, so the concentration of magic within must be very weak as opposed to out here in Snowdin with it's higher population of monsters. Soul maturing is an odd and uncomfortable stage. Even the mighty Papyrus went through it with less grace than he'd care to tell. Full of angst, rebellion, and pent up unknown feelings, with a need to just lock himself away because he felt like no one understood what he was going through. Ah, the silliness of youth. Knowing this, the great and terrible Papyrus relents...for now. "FINE." That was all that needed to be said. She nods and ascends the stairs, taking retreat to the bathroom. "Rough day?" The flower speaks up but Papyrus ignores it. He tended to do that as much as possible. He didn't know why exactly. There was just something in the back of his skull that made him distrusting of the floral fellow. Like a memory that was blurry but you still got a feeling from even if you're not sure it's real. He is about to shut the door just as Sans makes his way into view. "sup." Papyrus just motions him to enter and locks the door by the time he does. "dare i ask...?" "UPSTAIRS." "ah. and do you know...?" "NO. I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S DOING AND I DON'T CARE SO LONG AS NOTHING IS DAMAGED." Typical Papyrus. "you really think she'd be stupid enough to break something of ours?" "YOUR STUFF IS NOT MY CONCERN. SHE CAN BREAK THAT JUNK FOR ALL I CARE." "gee. thanks, bro." "Is anyone going to let me know what happened?" The flower chimes in again. And again Papyrus ignores it as he heads to his room. Sans kicks his shoes off and tosses his jacket over the sentient plant. "don't worry about it, weed. if you were meant to know, we'd tell ya." Flowey shakes the jacket off and glares as Sans too heads to his room, but not before knocking on the bathroom door. "you alright in there?" Nothing is heard other than the shower. "hey, ya don't have to worry. pap and i aren't gonna mess with you...much." Still nothing. "fine, baby soul, be like that. just don't come crying to me when you feel bad. i mean that literally. i ain't helping you." He starts to walk but then stops. "oh! and don't forget, you're making dinner. pap only let that slide because you were practically dead. so don't get any ideas thinking you can get out of it." "Did you just really say that?!" Shouted not her but the flower. "the hell is your problem?" "Did you really just insinuate she'd harm herself?" "i dunno...maybe?" "You can't say that kind of stuff to her!" "why not?" Flowey just stares at the skeleton oddly before realization clicks. "You...You don't know how she came to the Underground, do you?" This had Sans's attention. "she told me that she fell." Flowey becomes uneasy. He produces several vines and, rather impressively, repels himself up to the banister where he swings through the railing to plant his pot on the floor. "wow. a plant that parkours. see something new every day." "I'm not comfortable telling you this, seeing as she hasn't and I don't think it's my place, but I can't let you say idiotic things like that." Sans kneels down imposingly. "okay, weed, you have intrigued me. if she didn't fall, then how did she get here?" Flowey rubs his leaves nervously. "Well...Falling is how she came to the Underground. But...She didn't fall from an accident." If color could drain from a skull it would be doing so for Sans. "you're telling me she..." "She fell on purpose. She...was trying to die." Flowey shirks inward, not liking this subject and feeling like he's broken some bond of trust. "I don't know about her life on the surface. She doesn't tell anyone about that stuff, not even Mom. But I have been with her since the start and I can tell...Under all that toughness and pass the goofy dork innards...She's very sad deep down." A new expression comes to Sans, a look of reverence and understanding. The human put up with a lot being down here and more for just being with the brothers. But she never seemed to be like what the flower had said. How bad was the surface to drive her to end it all and yet want to live down here? "Um...You won't tell her I said anything, will you?" Sans's thoughts broke yet kept him a bit cloudy, hearing only bits and pieces of what Flowey said. "huh? oh...no. i ain't opening my yap about this." Flowey sighs with relief until the sounds in the bathroom are less water based and more like someone getting ready to come out. In a panic of getting busted, Flowey throws Sans under the proverbial and shoves the skeleton into the door before repelling back to the table on which he stays. Obviously pissed about this, Sans growls and aims to go pluck every petal from the flower's head. Yet before he can even get off his bony butt the door to the bathroom opens to give him a bit of a bop that wasn't all that hard. Understandably, the confused human in a towel peeking halfway out the door. "Sans?" Sans gave her one look before he turned away trying hard not to blush, grateful that the cloth was long enough to cover her form. Though his behavior gave her the impression of something bad happening. "Are you okay? Oh shit, I didn't hit you, did I? I'm so sorry. I didn't know..." "i'm fine. just stumbled is all. now go put something on, will ya? i can't deal with ya when like that." Recalling the last incident that was bathroom related, she pulls the towel up more and goes back inside. "My bad." He rubs his skull. "it's fine. you were just concerned." He picks himself off the floor and tries to regain his cool. "So I was thinking...How does some comfort food sound?" "depends. what ya thinking?" "Tomato soup and grilled cheese. Provided we have that stuff." "...yeah, we got that. i did some 'shopping' earlier." "Sweet. Thanks, buddy." The door opens moments later. "Will Pap be okay with such a menu? Do I need to brace myself for impact once he knows?" "if it was other soup than yeah. he's got a thing for the tomato stuff." "So I've noticed." He looks her up and down, nothing is different besides the towel wrapped around her hair. "What?" "you're wearing the same thing you had on." "I'm limited in my clothes here. It's not like I can go across the street to Nanny and change. The other outfit I got is in need of washing but I don't trust Pap not to trash or burn it just to piss me off." "seems legit." She goes to walk past him and what the flower told him has him feeling guilty. "hey..." She stops at the top of the stairs. "Yeah?" His jaw clenches, words struggling to form as he determines if he should say something or not. "i...i didn't...that stuff i said..." "Dude, chill, we're cool. Don't stress over it." Is she forgiving him so easily? "we are?" "Yeah. I'd probably say that stuff too if someone was getting close to my buddy too. But that just shows how good of a friend you are. I respect that." Sans felt dumbstruck. Did she not hear him at all? Fuck it! Roll with it. "y-yeah. thanks. i was just being cautious is all." "I get it. That's why we're cool. You don't want to see him hurt. I don't want to hurt him. That's why we're just friends. No rushing into unknown territory here. That's for sure. Not with this damn thing being so unstable." She points to her chest and, while he knows she means her soul, he sees a joke opportunity. "yeah...with a set of knockers that big, i can imagine it being hard to stable." His grin is cocky and the only clue that has her realizing what just happened. Her expression goes from puzzled to sly snickering when she gets the joke. "Ah yes, these annoying chest bags. Hard to miss such large targets. Good jab, my friend." She took the punches and merely walks off downstairs to get cooking. That had him feeling a little off. Normally she would at least give him a quick quip back. Maybe she was in a bad mood under all that nice. He rolls his shoulders and goes to his room. She'll let them know when dinner is ready anyway. "Lynsie? Are you okay?" Flowey comes into the kitchen, he sets himself on the counter beside me as I butter bread while the pan heats up and a pot of soup warms. "Yeah, I'm fine. Got to chat with Toriel today." "Oh? How is she?" "Missing us. She even tempted me with my favorite meal." "Low blow." "Did make me wanna go though. Not gonna lie. That sew is the bomb." "What are you? A cheesy 90's character?" "Word, yo. I'm super funky fresh to the max." He shakes his head in disappointment but his giggling says otherwise. "But for real...Did anything happen today? You came home upset." I sigh. "I'm going through magic puberty. That's as blunt as I can possibly be about it." I can almost hear the gears in his head grind while I add some milk to the soup. "...What?" "From what I understand, my soul's starting to produce magic to match my body's age and it's something that can influence my emotional state. *groans* Just like when I was twelve going on thirteen. Nothing like the last day of sixth grade to be welcomed into the wacky world of womanhood." "...Is puberty really that bad?" "It sucks for everyone, boy or girl. It's only different for each gender. With us girl humans, we know when we hit our moment when we suddenly gain weight fairly quickly. Then our chests begin to store fat, aka, make these annoying things. Depending on genetics, other parts store fat too. Our growth rate slows down. Hormones start changing things on the inside that affect the outside to the point where you can become a completely different person to anyone that knows you. And then there's a thing I'm not even going to mention because I'm making food right now but will allude to it being gross as hell." He cringes as I put the sandwiches into the pan, making a loud sizzling hiss. "That sounds awful." "It is. But we all have to go through it and learn to deal with it. Because no enemy is greater in this world than yourself. Yet if you can tame yourself than that enemy becomes your greatest ally." One hand of mine holds a spatula to flip the sandwiches and the other a long spoon that keeps stirring the soup. "So it gets better eventually?" "Kind of. But you hardly notice any of this after enough time passes." "Growing up sounds like a pain." "All I can say is this...Enjoy youth to the fullest. You don't have to give up being a kid when you grow up, but it does get turned down a bit. Back on the surface, I still have toys. I have video games and comic books. Sure, I don't play with them as often as I used to. But just seeing or holding them feels good. Let's me know the happiness I once had can never truly die." The mood gets a bit somber as I flip the sandwiches and restart that sizzling hiss. "Flowey..." "Yeah?" "Can I have a hug?" He jerks a little in surprise. "Where did that come from?" "Just feel like I want one. If that's okay?" He closes himself off and I know I asked too much. I focus on my cooking, turning the burners off when the soup begins to bubble and the sandwiches are a lovely golden hue. I go about covering the food to keep it hot as I head out into the living room. "Yo, bone-boys! Food's ready!" It takes a few seconds to hear Sans pop into the kitchen while it takes a moment or two for Papyrus to appear at his door. "Evening, Papyrus." "HUMAN." He heads down the stairs as I enter the kitchen and Sans comes out with a sandwich in his teeth. "Gooey enough for you?" He nods in content while dunking the sandwich into a mug of soup. "WHAT TRAVISTY HAVE YOU BROUGHT ABOUT MY KITCH WITH THIS TIME?" Feeling funny, I get hammy. "Forsooth, my lord of bone. I present thee with broth made from the berry of nightshade. And bread, grilled gold that has hidden within the finest viscus form of bovine lactation." Papyrus stares at me funny before looking at Sans. "THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY?" "tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches." "OH. THAT'S NOT SO BAD." "I thank thou." He flicks my forehead. "NO. BAD HUMAN. STOP THAT." I snicker. "Shall I serve you or..." "I AM FULLY CAPABLE OF GETTING MY OWN." "Of course. I merely just wanted to treat you after a hard day's work. Unless, of course, that's just part of my evil plan to lull you into a false sense of security. Oooooh." I tease and he glares at me hard before do so to Sans. "YOU TOLD HER, DIDN'T YOU?" "she ain't a threat and ya know it." "SHE IS NOW!" "the worst she can do is annoy us." "YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!" "Master..." Papyrus flinches. "How can I prove to you that I mean you and your brother no harm?" "YOU CAN'T." [You give Papyrus the puppy dog eyes of guilt.] He backs up a bit. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" [You keep doing it.] He sweats a little. "S-STOP THAT." [You strengthen the look.] He looks to Sans but his brother is enjoying every moment. "MAKE HER STOP!" "why? she ain't hurting nobody." [You are determined to make him understand.] [It works...Papyrus gives in...but only so you'll stop.] "FINE! YOU'RE NOT A THREAT! NOW STOP MAKING THAT LOOK!" I smile and bow. "That is the extent of my power. I am now powerless since my secret is revealed. Congratulations!" He shoves past me and Sans laughs. "dinner and a show. today just gets better and better." I follow Papyrus in to take Flowey back to his table and he leaves the kitchen with his food as I get Flowey's portion before my own. "So..." I sit down with Flowey away from the one skeleton looking to kick my ass. "Will I be sleeping in the shed tonight? Because if so, a blanket would be very appreciated." "i'm fine with ya being indoors. pap, your thoughts?" Papyrus snarls while chewing. "he didn't say no." Papyrus gulps down his mouthful. "YOU DO NOT TALK FOR ME...BUT HE ISN'T WRONG." "Really?" "whoa. you said i'm right? i think hell froze over." "*GROAN* WHILE I AM NOT ALLOWING YOU TO BE INDOORS BECAUSE OF SOME SYMPAHTIC REASONS. I AM ONLY ALLOWING YOU TO BE INDOORS BECAUSE, AS A PROPER PET OWNER, IT WOULD BE A BLACK MARK ON MY RECORD TO HAVE YOU DIE DUE TO SOMETHING SO STUPID AS BEING COLD. THAT'S ALL." "Awe...You do care." "ONE OF THESE DAYS, I WILL SMOTHER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP." "Papyrus, you don't have to add icing to this cake. It's already sweet enough." "...ARE YOU SURE WE CAN'T HANDLE THE QUEEN IF WE KILL HER?" "bro, even asgore had trouble dealing with tori and that's his wife." Papyrus growls in reluctant agreement. The night continues on with us watching Mettaton on TV. Thankfully, it's one of his movies and nothing weird. Though it's not like his movies aren't odd sometimes. Mettaton seems to make a lot of action, thriller, horror, and psychological type films. Not bad stuff really. Though the CGI human that normally is a villain character is cliché and lackluster in character personality, merely filling the bad role. He needs help writing his scripts. Eventually Papyrus heads off to bed, Flowey nods off, and Sans lazily comes out of the kitchen sipping on mustard. "You headed for bed too, bone-boy?" "yeah. *yawn* don't stay up too late." "I know. I got work too now." "oh...i meant because pap will bitch about the light and noise. but that too." I watch him shuffle towards the stairs. "Sans..." "huh?" I feel unsure if I should mention Mettaton to him or not. Sans is someone I trust. But even he has trouble trusting me back. "Sleep well." I'm such a coward. "you too, kiddo." I mentally punch myself for that. He heads to his room and I shut the TV off once he's gone. With not much else to do, since all my doable chores are already complete and the other are not good to do while they sleep, I give in to the night. I lay down on the couch for some shuteye. Maybe things will be okay in the morning. Hopefully I'm wrong about Mettaton doing something to force me to Hotland. I doubt it though, as when my gut feels this twisted I tend to be right. Maybe these thoughts won't mess with my dreams. If I'm allowed to dream that is. Gaster should need time to go over what he learned last night. A shiver racks my spine at the memory. And then another because I still don't have a blanket. Nice one.

Back to Normalcy (Lost and Found Arc)

Everyone brought Frisk and Chara out of the hospital and back home. Frisk and Chara weren't very happy with the terms they had to take to leave, but at least they were with their family.

After 30 minutes of driving, they all arived at Toriel's house, where Sans, Papyrus and Gaster were waiting for them. They went inside and saw the skeletons waiting for them in the living room.

"Hey, Sans, Papy, we're back!" Frisk declared.

All three of them immediately dropped what they were doing to see Frisk and Chara. All of them were so happy to see that glowing smile of Frisk's face, their eyesockets flooded with enough green energy to give them a flame-like aura.

"BRO! YOU'RE OKAY!" Sans said, crying tears of joy.

"You came back to us after all! I knew my greatness rubbed off on you!" Confirmed an estatic Papyrus.

Frisk wagged his tail happily and licked his brothers in the face.

"Yeah. Sure did." Agreed Frisk.

The brothers shared a hug as Erica and Soichiro approached them.

"Hey, mom, sorry I was so hard on Frisk earlier." Said a guilty Sans.

"It's fine. Your brother just needs some help. That's all." Replied Erica.

"Yeah. And we're really sorry. Chara and I fucked up real bad." Admitted a guilty Frisk, who tucked his tail between his legs.

"But, we're ready now, you guys." Chara said as she stepped forward.

"Hmm? What do you mean, Chara and Frisk?" Asked Gaster.

"To go to a therapist to talk about our problems. WITHOUT JUDGMENT."

"What? Why?" Questioned Sans.

"Big bro, you know why." Said Frisk.

"You've made it way more than obvious that we can't tell you anything without you being so judgmental."

"Frisk, come on. Go easy on me. I ju-"

"Stop. Just stop. You're just trying to make up for what you said earlier. I get it, Sans. But you're just too judgmental of everyone. I still love you, but you can't be such a prick when it comes to people doing those types of things. The world isn't black and white, it's all just different shades of gray. Some shades are brighter than others, but that's just how the world is sometimes. Even you have some dark spots in your special shade of gray, Sans. But that's okay because it's your shade. And the best thing is you get to choose what to do with it. The only problem: what you've done with it so far is use it to judge how dark other people's shades are."

"Yeah. I know. I'm still sorry, though. But I get it if you don't wanna tell me anymore. I wouldn't either."

"Sans. I can still tell you. Just please don't be so harsh with the judgment anymore."

"Sure. You made up for it, so I guess I can work that out."

"Thanks."

Sans and Frisk shared an awkward sibling hug. Papyrus joined in on it, happy they settled their differences.

"I knew you had it in you both! This is a family after all! All we had to do was talk it out!" Said the proud, younger skeleton.

"Thank you both! And as for you, Frisk and Chara, we'll all be there to support you one-hundred percent of the way!"

"Wow. Thanks, you guys. I guess we owe you one."

"You and Chara helped save the world twice AND bring equality to both monsters! I think we owe you. And even if we didn't, I'd say we're even now."

Frisk and Chara looked at each other happily, relieved that they would finally get the help they needed. And the best part was they wouldn't be judged by their family for asking for it in the first place.

Suddenly, Frisk and Chara remembered the lessons they missed out on.

"Hey. Ms. Toriel? Do you still have those homeschooling assignments?" Asked Chara.

"Oh! Yes, they are upstairs. Why?" Toriel replied, also forgetting their educational priorities.

"Give us the ones we missed out on, and we'll get started."

Yikes. Well, Toriel certainly wasn't expecting Frisk and Chara to remember their work. Thankfully, thanks to simply being homeschooled, they could make up what they missed out on easily.

"Come upstairs."

Toriel led them to her room. She went to a file cabinet with their homeschooling subjects. She swiftly gave them to the students, and they made quick work on getting started.

They looked determined to catch up on what they missed out on. They didn't look up from their papers and writing utensils for a while.

Five hours later, they brought every last assignment they missed out on to Toriel's room, completed. It was almost 8pm, and they had finished a massive amount of work in a small amount of time. It was incredible, but it was done. They knocked on Toriel's door.

"Hey, mom! We got the paperwork done!" Said Chara.

She heard a faint conversation through the door. It was between Asriel and Toriel.

"Do you really think Flowey might want that, mom?" Asked Asriel.

"I mean, think about it. He killed you a whole bunch of times. He only thinks you're his mom because you're mine."

"Asriel, Flowey had your dust and memories. Nothing more." Replied Toriel.

"If Flowey comes out, he and I are not related. He is not my son. You are."

"So what you're saying is-"

Chara barged in to hand Toriel her paperwork with Frisk in tow.

"HEY! CHARA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! I'M PRACTICALLY NAKED!"

"You call wearing a t-shirt and boxers naked?" Chara asked, mimicking Frisk's signature blank face, who was also doing it at that moment.

"I said 'practically', Chara! Sure, it doesn't count, but I'm still not decent!"

"Right. Well, you and mom can back to what you were doing beforehand -wear a condom, by the way- because Frisk and I just wanted to say we're all caught up."

"Yes, that's great, Chara." Toriel said, trying to rush them out.

"I'll get to them later. But first, let 'Phoebe' and 'Dante' have some fun, okay? They have been stressed out, and they need a break from it."

"If you two wanna fuck, that's fine, but just remember we still have to look for a therapist, please."

"Your brother's the only one I need, for his 'sessions' work for about 8 'hours', if you know what I mean."

"Are you using units of time to describe Asriel's size? That's weird. I'm leaving."

Chara set down her assignments and turned tail before she could ask anything else to her mother. Frisk dropped his paperwork off and promptly went to his room.

Once Chara got in her room and closed the door, her parents asked her something.

"Chara, why were they in the same room with each other with such little clothing?" Asked Charon.

"I'm sorry for saying this, but it's not a pretty story." Chara replied, feeling a little nauseous.

"We're inside your head and your soul; we're taking a look."

"Okay dad, but you're not going to like it."

Charon and Laura ran through her thoughts and memeories to find why Toriel and Asriel were like that. They regretted not heeding their daughter's word, for she was right after all, and they didn't like it. Good thing they were simply souls at this point, or they would puke. It made matters worse that Chara already had the urge, however.

"Chara, we're sorry your father and I didn't listen to you." Laura asked, somewhat disgusted.

"Apology accepted."

"Why would they do that? They are mother and son. They shouldn't be doing that."

"Mom was thinking about having sex with my brother for a while, and vice versa. They just recently did, and they enjoyed it. I told them they won't have to worry about me telling people, but if anything were to happen, I would call mom 'Phoebe', and I would call Asriel 'Dante'. However, all they want is sex from each other. Nothing more. They love each other, but they're not IN love with each other."

"That's...a very unorthodox way of solidifying a familial bond. But if that's what they wish to practice, then I can't say anything about it."

"What? Why not?"

"Sweetie. It's sex. They are both adults, and they both want it. Even then, I'm not sure whether that would be acceptable with monsters or not. But whatever the case, we won't say anything about it anymore."

"Okay. Thanks, mom and dad. Now let's get some sleep. Maybe the nightmares will stop with you two around."

"Well, maybe not stop, but lessen over time."

Chara finally retired for the evening, sleeping the same way she usually did.

"Chara, are you sleeping naked?" Laura asked, feeling her daughter's lack of clothing.

"Oh, yeah. Something you should know. I sleep naked. Unless it's chilly, then I wear something light to bed. And I...well, I've...learned how...I'm sorry. I can't. It's too weird."

"Sweetie, it's okay. You can tell us."

"I learned how to masturbate, and it feels so good."

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting you to say that. But that's good. And before we go any further, it's perfectly natural. And so is blood-letting from between your legs."

"Mom! I know! I-Toriel had to....you know, buy a book on the human reproductive system. Apparently, once a month, I get something called a 'period'? That's what it's called, right?"

"Yes. But let's get some sleep. I can feel how tired you are."

"Yeah. Good night, mom. Good night, dad."

And so, Chara went to sleep completely. She could finally slumber in peace with the help of her parents.

The next day, Frisk and Chara went to the kitchen to get something else to eat. They were feeling a lot better than they were before all of this happened.

"Hey, Chara? How did it feel sleeping last night?" Frisk asked as he got himself some salad.

"I don't know how to describe it." Replied a fully-refreshed Chara.

"It felt...nice? I mean, I had that nightmare again, but it stopped midway before my mom got hurt. Like she tried to alter the memory or something."

"I think your parents were trying to protect you from that nightmare again."

"Again? Why again?"

"Well, I meant to say 'this time', but 'again' came out of my mouth. I dunno why."

Suddenly, Charon took over Chara.

"That's right." He confirmed through Chara.

"We saw and felt Chara having that dream again about us. We decided to help her sleep better by making the dream a good one."

"Charon, you and Laura really are good parents, despite the circumstances you were placed in."

"Thanks...son."

"No problem. Now let Chara eat something. She didn't come in here for nothing."

"Yes, and then we'll be looking for a therapist, or whatever it's called."

Charon gave back control to Chara, letting her eat her breakfast.

"Finally. I need food now."

About 15 minutes later, after they finished eating, they went to Toriel's door, waiting for their next lesson.

"Hey mom, we're ready for the homeschooling session." Chara said, knocking on the door.

The bathroom door opened with Toriel draped in a towel.

"Well, that is-"

Chara screamed, not expecting Toriel to be behind her; Frisk's tail frizzed out from the unexpected boss monster fresh out of the shower.

"Oh! It's just you, mom. Thank God."

"Yes. Well, just give me a moment to dry off. No, you cannot watch. I remember your kisses from yesterday. I must admit, you do have a good technique, but you are lacking in experience. In addition, I am not into women, Chara. Sorry."

"Don't apologize, mom. Just let me enjoy wa-"

"No. Move. Now."

Chara blushed and obeyed, ready to let a blood vessel burst as Toriel walked into her room and locked the door.

"I'm attracted to my mom." She shamefully admitted.

"Chara, that's gross." Frisk said, putting his two cents in.

"Your mom is inside you, and she's-"

"Wrong. Mom."

"Oops. Let's go downstairs."

They went to the living room with pencils and pens, ready to get started. It took about 20 minutes, but Toriel and Asriel made it down the stairs to Frisk and Chara.

"Asriel? What are you doing here?" Frisk asked, forgetting about the night before.

"Dude. Remember? Mom." Replied an annoyed Asriel.

"Oh. But wait. Why is Ms. Toriel all dressed up to go out in public?"

"We will not be doing lessons today, Frisk." Responded a placcid Toriel.

"Instead, we will be looking for a therapist for you and Chara. Your birth parents will be assisting us in the endeavor."

"You're actually letting my parents get involved?"

A knock on the door was heard from the hall.

"Excuse me. It should be your parents."

Frisk's eyes instantly shined yellow brightly enough to attract his parents attention when they came inside.

"Frisk, it's okay, son. It's just us." Soichiro said, noticing the color of Frisk's eyes as he and Erica walked inside.

"Dad, how do you know I was scared?"

"Frisk, your father and I have always known." Answered Erica.

"Your eyes act like mood rings. The only time in which they don't act like that is if you don't feel anything. At that moment, they default to your true eye color."

Asriel and Toriel's interest was piqued.

"True eye color?" Inquired Asriel.

"What is it?"

"Frisk, show them."

Frisk closed his eyes and turned to Asriel and Toriel. He slowly opened his eyes back up to reveal that his eyes were actually gray. Asriel and Toriel immediately became scared.

"They look so empty. So devoid of life."

Frisk's eyes then became completely empty as he approached Asriel.

"I'm gonna get serious with you for a moment." He said.

"Sometimes when my eyes are gray like that, people are only mildly unsettled. But when my eyes look completely empty...boy, do they get scared. You should probably never fuck with me again. Unless you don't mind the look of death, that is."

"Don't speak like that, young man." Erica said, noticing that Asriel looked ready to run away screaming.

"Sorry, mom. Let's go."

Asriel trembled alongside Toriel as they all went into the living room to help find a therapist. It was difficult to know how long the trauma of seeing Frisk's eyes in their truest state would last, but Asriel would likely be unable to forget for a long time.

Crisco 129: Dystopian Sansby Dream AU-pt 7

Sans remembered.

“WHAT DID YOU JUST DO!?” Gaster screamed down at him, where he was kneeling in a corner of the basement room. Gaster had formed a magic bone and struck at Sans with it, and Sans had broken it before it reached him with one of his own bullets. “...nothin?” “DO YOU HAVE MAGIC OR DON’T YOU?” he formed another bone. “no? maybe, haha,” said Sans, blocking a second time. Then he got up and tried to run for the door. Suddenly he was dodging a moving labyrinth of bones. The door was blocked. He backed into another corner and Gaster appeared in front of him, still screaming. “Wait so do I just let you hit me?” he asked, ducking under the bone. His soul was racing. This was... not normal. Gaster’s hand caught him under the chin, yanked him off his feet and pinned him against the wall. “DO YOU HAVE MAGIC OR NOT?” “No!” “DO YOU HAVE MAGIC!” “I don’t!” Gaster flung him down in front of another wave of moving bones. Sans, remembering that he didn’t have magic, covered his head with his arms and closed his eyes. The bones punched through him, he felt the magic tug at his soul. Then all was quiet. “We’re done,” said Gaster, and he heard him leave. Sans looked at his arms, then stood up. He was unhurt. He crawled into the main basement and found Gaster sitting on the floor with his head between his knees, taking deep breaths. “Um. What was that?” Gaster raised his head and his expression was firm. “That was good, at least the second time. You need to remember you can do that. The next time it won’t be me, and it will hurt. You need to remember not to fight back. You can’t fight back. For as long as we’re in there—or you’re with them—you don’t have magic.” “But why didn’t it hurt?” Gaster smiled. “Have I taught you nothing? FIGHT magic needs intent.” “Yeah but those were real bullets!” Gaster stretched out his hand and formed a small bone bullet above it, pointing toward Sans. Sans walked closer and cupped his hands around it. He felt the energy fluctuate—five, ten, then one damage. Then it sank to a neutral hum. “Take it,” said Gaster, and Sans pressed the bone between his hands, feeling a shock of energy through his hands for a moment before it disintegrated. No damage. “Huh. I didn’t realize you could do that.” “It takes practice.” Gaster stood with a grunt and dusted his coat off. “Promise me you’ll remember this because I never want to do it again. Also you’ll know I won’t hurt you this time so the effect is ruined.” “I promise.” “Good. Let’s never do that again, hey?” he chuckled. It turned into a choke. “Ice cream?” said Sans. “Ice cream,” said Gaster. The post-training ice cream sessions had become an informal part of the ritual, and at some point had turned into an eating competition. Sans was catching up, to his pride—that accomplishment wasn’t nothing, Gaster could put away a vast amount of ice cream. Sans was pretty sure he’d heard him mumble something about drowning his guilt once when he remarked on it.

He had only recently began bringing Sans down there. The safe room was in the basement, thickly insulated and sealed against sound and magic leakage, concealed behind a row of shelves stocked with assorted pickles. Ever since Sans could remember, Gaster had drilled him on how to respond to questions—about his magic, what his dad did, what his friends were like. Especially about his magic, though. His earliest understanding had been that his magic was a very very important secret, and he had to keep it that way. It would be a game, just between the two of them; no one else could know or he’d ruin the game. Later Gaster explained that some people didn’t like magic for some reason, and so if Sans let anyone see him using magic he might get hurt. Papyrus would be in trouble too. Then slowly he learned the full truth. Two years before, when he was ten, Gaster had first brought him down here, made Sans kneel in a corner and interrogated him, shouting this time, interrupting him when he tried to answer and repeating questions. It lasted only half an hour the first time. After that the sessions replaced the usual drills. It was terrifying and disorienting, but Gaster never shouted at him outside of the safe room so Sans was able to mentally isolate it as a necessary part of his training, which Gaster told him it was. Sans sensed that the sessions were harder on Gaster than on him, and that was reassuring. He never broke, though he did start crying a few times: the first time, after they were done, instead of leaving and waiting for Sans to join him, Gaster picked him up and carried him out of the room, then sat on the floor by the pickle shelves hugging him tightly. He was shaking, and continued shaking even after Sans had stopped crying.

Sans stared up into a white light and counted all the promises he’d made in his life. He was soaking wet. Now and then a shiver passed through his body, arched backwards over a chair with hands cuffed to the back. He could faintly hear the humans talking in another room. He’d passed the first round of questioning almost without conscious mental effort. He knew how to respond to questions. Now he was remembering Gaster, faintly, in fading flashes that he doubted even as he looked at them. The colors of that world were too bright and warm, he could barely believe he had ever belonged to them. His spine was aching, a persistent sharp ache slowly growing in intensity that sent another involuntary twitch or two through his body. Trying to ignore it, he thought about Grillbz and Papyrus instead, eating dinner without him, hoping he’d appear and slowly realizing that he wouldn’t. He wondered if Grillbz would wait up for him, in case he came home. Home, huh. When had the cafe become home? It undeniably was now. Especially with Papyrus back. Dang, he ought to have told Papyrus that he and Grillbz were a thing. It could only get more awkward the longer he waited. He could be kinda stupid sometimes. ...What time was it? Was it too much to hope that they’d let him go before morning, and he could do the broadcast as normal? He was sure they didn’t know anything yet, but if the broadcasts stopped the day after he was arrested it’d be hard for them to miss the implications.

Late that night Papyrus woke to a gentle light in the room and rolled over to look at Sans’ bed. Grillbz, still fully clothed, was lying there with his back to him. Papyrus slid out of bed and stood behind him. He was hugging Sans’ pillow tightly, face pressed into the fabric. His eyes were open, and he looked far from sleep. He turned to look at him and Papyrus saw the pain in his face. Papyrus sat on the side of the bed and squeezed his upper arm. “MAyBE hE’Ll COmE BAcK. I dID.” Grillbz hid his face in the pillow. Papyrus heard him leave the room later in the night and pace up and down in the hall. When he woke again it was almost morning and Grillbz had disappeared entirely. Papyrus hoped he wasn’t doing anything dangerous.

“Let him breathe, the little shit’s not that strong. These things are easy to dust.”

It had to be morning. This was the only thought left in Sans’ mind and it fizzled in and out like a dying bulb. What time was it? Would he know? Did they know? He was innocent, he hadn’t done anything, he had no magic, he was innocent. If he teleported back to the cafe could he convince both Grillbz and Papyrus to run with him? Where could they go? He couldn’t teleport to places he’d never been, and he’d never been outside the fence. He heard radio static. Someone in the next room had switched on a radio. He waited for them to switch to one of their stations, but they appeared to be waiting. They don’t know, he told himself over the static. Anything could have happened. They don’t know it’s you. It’s not you. Maybe you can kill yourself with one of dad’s blasters before they get back? Don’t do that, they’ll just go after Grillbz and Papyrus. Suddenly he was hearing music. Someone adjusted the radio and swore. He knew that song, it was by Gorillaz. Was he dying? Gorillaz was absolutely banned. The Confederation had a special hatred for the band and he and the old lady made sure to play Feel Good Inc. on Confederation holidays as a special ‘fuck you.’ This song had a softer sound and an almost chirping beat.

Up on melancholy hill There's a plastic tree Are you here with me Just looking out on the day Of another dream

Melancholy Hill. One of his favorites. He had to be dreaming, and he waited to wake up, wondering why, if he were dreaming such a nice dream in other respects, he couldn’t also dream that the pain was gone and he was free to lie down and relax his body. The song ended. He waited, staring into the light.

“Heya. Legendary fartmaster here in the confederacy of niceness and non-torture and kittens. How are you doin? Weather is perfectly cloudy with a 10% chance of assholes and a 26% chance of soul-crushing propaganda. Which is why you should stay inside and listen to your radio instead. 99% guaranteed to be not-soul-crushing. Just mildly irritating.”

That was his voice. Sans lay listening in shock.

“Which reminds me, quick trivia: what kinda creature can function both as a fuzzy pet and as a decorative ceiling support? A cat-er-pillar.” Sans gave a faint, painful snort. That was great. The broadcast continued to the end, and he listened in fascination to his own voice. Maybe the old lady had someone in reserve and hadn’t told him. He’d have to ask her, when he got back. Just before they switched off the radio he thought he heard someone say “it’s not him, but I see what you mean about the voice.”

It was another five days before they let him go, but after that he knew he’d be alright. The broadcast played as normal each morning. He listened intently for any tells that it was another person speaking, and that he hadn’t just somehow, unconsciously, made spare recordings of himself on equipment he was sure he didn’t have. Minor things—inflection, transition between ideas—made him wonder, but he was never quite sure. He might have said something like that. Hard to tell. Finally one evening he was led to an ordinary cell with a cot, where he slept like a dead monster until Markin shook him awake. “Hey,” he said. “You’ve been released. Sorry about this, stupid mix-up.” Sans nodded and followed him out, not quite believing even as they gave him back his clothes (complete with packets of emergency ketchup, a tiny flashlight and a whole pancake in the pockets) and steered him out the door and into a dark car. He panicked a little then. He’d caught only a brief glimpse of hazy golden light, no way to tell where they were or where they were actually taking him. Then the car stopped and Markin helped him out and they were standing across from the cafe. He took a moment to straighten his vest before walking across. The cafe was bustling with the usual morning rush. A few heads turned as he came in. “Sans?” “Hey, Sans!” “See? I told you he’d be fine!” Suddenly it seemed the whole room was staring at him. Sans waved with his usual grin and looked at Steve, who was regarding him over the rim of his coffee cup. “Mornin.” “Hey. How are you?” “Happy as a flapjack,” said Sans, picking up Steve’s empty plate. He stifled a scream. He’d forgotten he had broken fingers. “Hell does that mean?” “Dunno, but it’s true.” He pushed into the back, Markin following and offering to take the plate, and slid it onto the counter with the other dirty plates. Grillbz was at the griddle with his back to them. He turned as Sans put the plate down and froze, spatula in the air. “Heya,” said Sans. “I’m back.” Grillbz stared at him. Sans registered that there were pancakes which needed turning. He nudged around Grillbz and took the spatula away from him. Grillbz’ hand landed firmly on his shoulder, as if checking that he was real. Sans awkwardly scraped the first pancake free, holding the spatula between his palms, and flipped it. It slapped sadly down with an edge over the pancake next to it. “Ow. Oops.” Grillbz took the spatula back, quickly flipped the rest of the pancakes and then turned Sans around and knelt in front of him. “You’re back.” “Huh, yeah. It’s good to see you.” “Are you alright?” “As alright as can be expected.” Sans held up his fingers and grinned. Grillbz visibly cringed, took his hands and looked closely at them. “Hey! It’s alright, I’m alright.” “...” Grillbz stood, tossed the pancakes onto a plate, and handed it to Markin. “Here.” “Uh, OK?” Markin went out into the cafe. Grillbz held out his arms. Sans leaned into them and Grillbz gently lifted him and carried him upstairs. “Hey. Where are we going?”   “You need to rest.” “You’ll be OK without me?” “I think I can survive another day.” “Well, good. I do feel kinda awful.” “You look it.” “Thanks a lot.”   Grillbz sat him on the bed and brought him his pajamas, then politely averted his eyes while Sans changed. Sans pushed up his sleeve over his new tattoo. “Hey. I’m decent, look. Now we match.” Grillbz looked for several moments with a blank expression, then bent and kissed the stained bone. “Did Gaster tell you?” “Nope. I saw your tattoo once when you were changing.” “..When were you in my room while I was changing?” “Few years ago. When Paps and I were first living with you.” “Oh, that’s right.” he smiled. “It seems like forever ago but it wasn’t that long at all.” Sans pulled his sleeve back down and fought a powerful urge to slump down and close his eyes. For a moment he wondered how to ask about Grillbz’ own tattoo, the question between star or dash still seemed important, but then he decided it wasn’t. He trusted Grillbz now, and his interest in the past was fading. But as it turned out he didn’t have to ask. Grillbz itched at his sleeve above the tattoo with a meditative look, then said “I think the reason it’s blank is because they didn’t bother designating elementals. If you’d been arrested, then either you were killed in prison, or they broke you well enough that they felt you wouldn’t be a threat. If you had a tattoo and you were alive it meant you broke. And I broke.” “Y’don’t look very broken to me,” said Sans, yawning. Grillbz helped him lie down and pulled the covers over him. “That’s because you helped me pull myself together, beautiful punster. Do you need anything?” “Nah...” Sans was asleep within seconds. It must have been hours later when Papyrus woke him. “YOu’RE ALiVE!!” “Hey bro. S’good to see you.” Papyrus lifted him, still wrapped in the covers, and hugged him, crying. Sans noticed his slacks draped across the bottom of the bed. He pawed them closer to him, fished the pancake out of a pocket and began eating it. Papyrus wiped his eyes and looked at him in confusion. “..SAns. WHerE DiD THaT CoME fROm?” “Pockets bro.” “HAs THAt bEeN IN THERe sINCe yOU LEFt?” “Yep. Good thing monster food doesn’t spoil heh?” “THIS ISn’T MONsTER foOD! It’S FAkE PEoPLE FOOd!” “Oh really? Well it looks alright, maybe the Crisco petrifies it a little.” Grillbz appeared in the doorway with a tray. “HE’s EATInG A FIvE-DaY-OLD PanCAKE!” shouted Papyrus. Grillbz frowned at Sans, who was scarfing down the last shreds of pancake. “Please don’t. I brought you real food.” “Aw thanks, you didn’t have to do that.” “YES WE DID. JoiNT DEcISION, WE’rE EAtING In HERE. WITh YOU.” “That reminds me, I couldn’t get the other tray. Papyrus, do you think you could” “YEP! GlADLy!” Papyrus gave Sans another squeeze—Sans made a creaking sound, rediscovering how sore his joints were—and then bounded out of the room. Grillbz set the tray down and sat on the side of the bed near Sans. “Don’t worry about the broadcast,” he whispered. Sans nodded. “I know! They played it in the next room, I heard it.” “Oh.” Grillbz looked up at a crashing sound and WHOOPSIE!!! From downstairs, followed by footsteps on the stairs. “I’m glad,” he said quickly, then stood and busied himself with unloading the tray he’d brought. A moment later Papyrus reentered in a rush. “I MaY HAVe DEnTEd A pOt. SOrRY.” “Don’t worry, it doesn’t matter,” said Grillbz.

Sans went back to sleep immediately after dinner. He woke in the morning when he heard the faint sound of a door closing across the hall. He slipped out of bed, careful not to wake Papyrus (who was sleeping with his arms and legs going four different directions and all his covers on the floor), and went into the hall. Grillbz was just at the head of the stairs. He paused and waited for him. “And where’re you off to so early, handsome?” whispered Sans. Grillbz gave a mysterious half-smile. “Come see.” They went into the storage room, and Sans saw immediately that some boxes had been rearranged to hide the loose section of boards. Grillbz lifted up the loose section and dropped down onto a crate he’d placed in the wine cellar for that purpose. He looked up. “Coming?” “Catch me.” Grillbz reached up and Sans jumped into his arms. The dusty floor below them was scuffed clear in a track leading back to the broadcasting room. “So it was you doing the broadcast. I thought I was going insane.” “No. It was me. There wasn’t anyone else.” “How’d you get my voice so well?” “I don’t know, I wasn’t sure if I could do it. But I’ve listened to you a lot.” He smiled. “I was.. so scared, actually, that I wouldn’t be able to do it and—I don’t know, but I knew I had to try, because otherwise it’d be worse for you.” “It was perfect. Kinda disorienting to listen to actually. But I think you saved my life.” “Oh God that’s what I was afraid of. Thank God I was convincing enough.” “You really were, my sparks.” Sans squeezed him reassuringly. “Yeah... I’m so glad you’re back.” They climbed into the broadcast room, where everything was as Sans had left it. They checked and cleaned the generator because Grillbz was concerned he hadn’t done it well enough while Sans was gone. There were no problems. “Do you want to do the broadcast?” said Grillbz. “I can do it again if you’d rather not.” “Only if you want to.” “I don’t really, I think you’re better at it.” “OK cool. Can you do the typing though?” “Definitely.” Sans sat on Grillbz’ lap as Grillbz looked over his shoulder to type

>Guess who’sk here?

>Legendary Fartmaster the First?!

>Yesp. -Yep. He’s pretty OK he says.

“Do you not know how to use delete?” said Sans. “Or backspace?” Grillbz made an embarrassed sound. “Look, some of us haven’t been able to practice our typing skills every day on illegal machinery.” “Is that why you’re just typing with your index fingers?” “Do you want me to do it or not?!” Sans laughed.

>So who’s on for today?

>The First. No more hot air.

>Haha! I must say I love your designation. Oh, and if I may presume, I think I know who you are!

>..Who?

>Tall, warm, flame affinity. You’re a dragon!

Grillbz made a puffing sound and Sans laughed out loud. “I mean that’s pretty close.” “Mhmm.” “I think elementals are cooler than dragons,” said Sans. Grillbz smiled. “I ah... oh. Thank you.”

>Well? Am I right or am I right? (don’t tell me either way, leave me in my delusion)!

>That’s not a basd guess. Maybe somedays thigs will get better and I can introduce you. -the First

Sans dictated.

>Oh, that would be lovely!

>Here’s hoping, then.s

>I look forward to it. Get ready to play the song.

Sans held the headset up so he and Grillbz could both hear the music.

I was left to my own devices Many days fell away with nothing to show

“Pompeii,” said Sans happily. Grillbz raised an eyebrow. “Petrified bodies...?” “Nah it’s a song by Bastille.”

And the walls kept tumbling down In the city that we love

“A song about petrified dead people written by a French jail. Perfect.”

“You are unexpectedly well-educated for a citizen of this country.”

“You talked about this song once before. I was listening.”

“Really! You’re right, I kinda remember that.” Sans kissed him. “I think you remember more about what I’ve said than I do myself.”

“Perhaps you don’t realize how very fascinating you are,” said Grillbz, pulling him in for another kiss. Sans nuzzled in close, only pulling away when he heard the song winding down.

“Alright, quiet in the recording room,” he said. “And don’t distract me.”

“I’ll try.”

Grillbz sat very straight and Sans slipped his headset on.

“Good morning all, it’s Legendary Fartmaster again and it’s a beautiful day.”

Pt 1

That’s it, this is finally completed. Wooot. I may actually start brushing up chapters and posting them to AO3 now idk, hope you liked this ride

Chapter 48: Plan Day

I’ve been planning these next few chapters for-fucking-ever and because of one line of dialogue I had to completely change what I originally planned. Fml.

Back from Hawaii, not sure if I told you guys I was going there- but yeah now I’m back haha. Got lots of inspiration for future Sans Nights if you guys were interested, but for now, enjoy the Sans Day!

Warnings: idk was a short chapter but then I accidentally added three pages, lots of build up to next chapter, hiccups are the worst, vomiting is pretty bad too, alcohol aesthetic

[Sans Days/Nights]

[Buy me a coffee] [Patreon]

.

You stood staring at the destruction of your apartment, thoughts drawing a blank on what exactly you should be feeling at the moment.

“Alphys?”

“Y-yes?” Alphys stepped beside you, looking between you and your home quickly.

“You guys took Samus to your place right?” You asked, finding yourself only able to place concern for your snake.

“Yes. S-she is in our living room.” She confirmed. You nodded, sighed, and stepped over the busted door into your apartment.

You looked at your burnt couch, shattered tv, broken table… And knelt onto the floor. There was a faint smell of chemicals hanging in the air, probably what was used to burn your couch- you were surprised the entire building wasn’t gone if they set fire to something…

“You okay?” Sans asked from behind you. You gave a very long sigh and placed your head in your hands, suddenly very, very tired.

“Yep,” You flatly said. “I have no idea what my insurance will cover.” You muttered as an afterthought. You didn’t even want to see what they did to the other rooms.

“I’ll call the police, just... take a moment.” Sans gave you a pat on the back, before walking down the hall and pulling out his phone.

You rubbed at your growing headache, and looked back to see the other monsters clustered around the busted door, looking around but not stepping in. You sighed, stood up, and pushed some shattered glass with your shoe. You were half heartedly trying to clear a section of floor for you to sit down before you accepted that it probably wasn’t a good idea at the moment- unless you wanted some glass in your ass. You shook your head and continued kicking a small path clear in the living room, not really leading anywhere but your mind was too blank to focus on anything at the moment.

You brushed away part of your table, and noticed a small black card on the ground. It seemed clean despite being under the mess, and you realized it was a laminated business card. You felt your eyebrows lower, and you picked it up.

On the back you could see a silver map of part of the city, downtown, you realized, with an address on the bottom. You turned it over to see its front, seeing a stylized [M-M] fake burnt on it like a brand, and “Man-Made” next to it. No phone number, no clarification.

“You find something, human?” Undyne asked, finally stepping into the room.

“What’s ‘Man-Made’?” You asked, turning and showing her the card. Papyrus spoke up despite not being in the room.

“I believe it is when you humans make something, you put a little label on-”

“No Paps,” You cut him off. “I-... I appreciate it, but I mean like, is there a place called Man-Made or…?” Undyne looked at the card, frown growing slightly.

“Don’t know of any place called that, but we can look it up when we get back to our place.” She shook her head. “I have a feeling they aren’t very monster friendly though, if they are recent.”

“May I?” Gaster startled you and Undyne, suddenly appearing beside you. Undyne looked back to the entryway and back at Gaster as if trying to figure out how he moved so quickly. You were already used to his teleporting, for the most part, and recovered quickly.

“Sure.” You held out the card to him between two fingers, and he quickly examined the card closely. He turned it around, eyes slightly narrowing at the map.

“This is a high quality card, it would not belong to a simple business.” He reasoned, explaining out loud probably for your benefit. “However the silver on black is of atrocious taste. It is simply bad color scheme choice. Unless, of course, you were in a place with artificial lighting, then it would be understandable.” He offered the card back to you. “Someplace expensive, someplace without natural light.”

You thought about it, mind tripping on what it could be. Then you realized you two were honestly critiquing a business card while standing in your ruined home. Maybe you should focus more on the… situation at hand. “Thanks.” You sighed and tucked the card in your pocket.

You heard a door close, and Sans walked from the hallway a moment later.

“So...?” You asked, watching as he scratched the back of his head and looked away from you.

“The police are busy, but they’ll send someone over here once they have the time...”

“Really.” You deadpanned. “They can’t- My home is-! They- they honestly can’t send anyone?” Anger started boiling your blood, not at Sans, but your voice rose a little. You sharply inhaled and placed your face in your hands again, trying to put a cap on your anger.

“I know- I know. I’m sorry, I tried getting through to them but it seems like there is a lot going on around town.” Sans sighed, and motioned to the others. “Lets… Lets just get to Alphys and Undyne’s place and figure out what to do.” You nodded, so very, very tired of everything.

.

Your headache wasn’t going away.

The walk to Alphys and Undyne’s place was annoyingly long, and seemed to drag out more than you would care. Sans seemed to notice how quiet you were, and offered his hand to you while you walked. You accepted it, and his thumb rubbed small circles on your hand to try and comfort you. You appreciated the effort, but what you really needed was a nap.

You’ve never been to Alphys and Undyne’s before, you realized as you stepped into their apartment. It looked almost the same size as yours, but with a different layout and smaller kitchen. There was various anime posters around, along with shelves of figures as well as a couple swords. It looked more lived-in than your pre-destroyed apartment, before the monsters moved in at least. You couldn’t help but to notice Gaster silently staring at the the mess piled in the corners and the trash that was kicked under the futon. You weren’t going to say anything about it.

“M-make yourself at home. I’ll gra-grab the laptop for you.” Alphys said, quickly shuffling past the living room and leaving the rest of you at the entry. Undyne and Papyrus made their way to the kitchen, and you, Sans, and Gaster sat on the futon against the wall. It was an older model, you realized, feeling one of the support beams uncomfortably under the thin cushion. You shifted your weight and let your head rest back, though you apparently were slightly too tall to let it completely rest against the back of the seat.

Sans pat your thigh to get your attention as Alphys walked back in with her laptop, and held it out for you. You grabbed it and opened it, noticing that it seemed like it was self repared in a few places, and a few keys didn’t quite match the rest of the keyboard. Did she get this out of a dump?

“W-well, yes.” Alphys answered, shocking you. “I got attached to it in the underground and have lots of… Human history, saved already on it.”

“Oh shit, I didn’t mean to say that out loud. Sorry.” You put a hand to your mouth, eyes wide. You must be more tired than you thought.

“It’s… Okay. I mean, you aren’t w-wrong.” Alphys’s hands knotted into themselves before she walked over to Undyne and Papyrus. Sans chuckled quietly beside you.

You rubbed your eyes trying to brush the sleep away, along with the still growing headache. It didn’t work, but you tapped the laptop awake anyway. You pulled the card out of your pocket to look it up, getting Sans attention.

“Where’d you get that?” He asked.

“It was at my apartment. Thought it might be a clue.” You quietly typed in ‘Man-Made’ onto the search engine, seeing the definition pop up as the first few dozen results. You hummed, disgruntled, and clicked on the maps tab. It took a moment to load, the few seconds dragging out as the front of your head ached ever so slightly stronger.

“Are you doing something?” You snapped, looking at Gaster. You caught him completely off guard, and actually managed to make him startle ever so slightly.

“Am I… What? No.” His eye halos looked you over before his brow rose in confusion.

You bit the inside of your cheek and shook your head, looking back at the computer.

“May I ask, why?” He asked anyway.

“I am having like, the worst headache right now. Sorry, didn’t mean to accuse you.” You quickly said, voice not as harsh as the outburst. The maps finally loaded, and a red dot appeared in the downtown area.

“You associate me with pains in your head?” Gaster leaned forward, still looking at you.

“Kinda, yeah.” You shrugged. “Static, numbness, and headaches-etc.” Out of the corner of your eyes you saw Gaster’s shoulders drop ever so slightly before he sat back again. You turned the card around and held it up to the gps result, seeing that it was the same location as the silver map. It took a few tries to get the little circle thing in the middle of the keyboard to move the mouse to the dot and click, but when it finally did a little side window popped up with the location’s info.

“A bar?” Sans was looking at the result as well.

“Looks like it.” You clicked through the images, seeing that it indeed looked like a bar, or some sort of club. It didn’t open till around sundown, but there still was no number available to call. “What kind of place doesn’t have a phone?” You mumbled.

“Maybe we could just drop by, see what connections it has to your apartment.” Sans suggested, but you shook your head and clicked to another picture of the establishment. A large sign hung in the window, declaring ‘NO COVER CHARGE’ in proud bold text. Below it, and just as proud, was the words ‘NO MONSTERS’.

“You guys won’t be allowed in- unless you just teleport in there.” You thought aloud.

“We have discussed this previously.” Gaster said softly. “We cannot teleport to someplace we have not been- or at the very least seen in person. Our magic simply does not have enough information to relocate us. Besides, teleporting to someplace you are unfamiliar with is dangerous enough. You might lose a limb.” Oh yeah.

“Right…” You looked down at your hands.

“Though perhaps, I could assist with my current… condition.” Gaster added. Both you and Sans turned to look at him.

“What do you mean?” Sans asked, keeping his voice low. You glanced back at the kitchen, seeing Paps still busy making something with the others. The clanging of pots and lids and boiling water seemed to be just enough noise to hide your current conversation safely.  

“Human, you remember how we managed to separate the Weed from my brother?” Gaster raised a hand and leaned back, crossing a leg over the other.

“You guys do know my name is Flowey, right?” A quiet voice asked from the other side of the room, from your pile of bags. You completely forgot that Flowey was with you, he’d been keeping so quiet for so long.

“When you turned Sans into the giant bone dog?” You asked, ignoring what Flowey said.

“No, before that.” Gaster waved his holed hand slightly. “We had used your shadow as a secretive way of transport, remember? I could simply hide myself though you, and once we are in the clear I could teleport my brother in- if needed, of course.” He smiled, proud of his plan. You thought about it, shrugging. You looked to Sans, and he nodded.

“Seems like the best option we have.” Sans said.

“Then it’s a plan.” You closed the laptop.

A little bit of movement caught your attention, and you noticed a brown long creature in a glass tank on the other side of the room. “Samus!” You shouted louder than you intended, and ran over to her.

“Oh my precious baby!! How are you, sweet thing?” You asked her as you popped off the lid to her tank and grabbed her. Her tongue flicked out and she let herself be pulled up without any resistance. You ran your hand over her beautiful scales, feeling like she got a little bigger- as unlikely as it would be. You heard creaking from the futon, and you turned to see Gaster standing on it, looking at the snake.

“What in the world is that?” He demanded, and at the same time both you and Sans burst out into laughter. Brother like brother, it looked like.

.

After a small attempt of getting Gaster adjusted to Samus, (which strangely, she acted like he didn’t exist and only seemed to want Sans) Papyrus announced dinner was ready. You placed Samus back in her tank, and shortly after eating, the three of you said goodnight to the others. Paps, Undyne, and Alphys didn’t know about about the plan. Far as they knew, you three were going to share the small futon for tonight.

“Night human! See you in the morning!” Papyrus gave you a tight hug before going to a bedroom separate to the one Undyne and Alphys were sleeping in. You waved him night as he closed the door, and slowly exhaled.

“Okay. How are we getting there?” You asked, turning to the others. You found it hard to concentrate with your headache ringing in your head. “No offence, I don’t want to be walking around in the dark.”

Sans shook his head. “Mettaton usually takes a limo to the stage, so his car should be out front.” He walked over to the coat rack, seeing keys hanging off of one of the holders.

“Sounds good.” Even though the thought of using Mettaton’s car in this situation did make you a little uncomfortable. You walked around the room, taking a deep breath and thinking the plan over though your head again to calm your nerves.

“Okay so we get over there…” You mumbled while tapping a finger, visualizing the steps one by one. “Gaster hides in my shadow.” Tap. “Get in, find out what’s the deal.” Tap, tap. “Find a hidden place to let Gaster out of my shadow. Gaster teleports to Sans- HIC!”

The hiccup completely disrupted your thoughts, causing you to pause in your steps and gather yourself for a moment. You blinked, and looked at Gaster and Sans, who were standing close to the doorway and looking at you with concerned faces.

“Oh… Sorry, lost my train of thought.” You shook your head, and realized your headache vanished. Your mouth opened without your permission for another hiccup, so strong you almost had to take a step back. “Wow those came out of nowhere.” You commented, feeling rather confused on the hiccups. Another one came, quieter than the last ones, but still just as shocking.

Gaster and Sans looked at each other, seeming to say something through their eyes alone.

“Should we-” Gaster started, but Sans quickly turned to the door.

“Come on, let’s get going. We have a night club to shine some light on.” He opened the door for you and Gaster, and the three of you headed out in the night.

You guys found Mettaton’s car fast enough, and climbed in. Sans took the driver’s seat, you behind him and Gaster in the back on the right. You could tell Gaster was trying not to look so obviously bewildered by the car, now that he was able to look at one closely, and he mostly just mirrored whatever you did.

“I didn’t know you can drive.” You half asked, followed by another quiet hiccup. You buckled yourself, and noticed Gaster watched your movements carefully before he did the same with his own buckle. The strap of fabric seemed to confuse him, but he didn’t question it.

“I’m not the best.” Sans admitted, adjusting his seat forward and putting the gear into drive.

The drive through town was mostly quiet, you just leaned against the window and watched the lights pass by the car one after another in the darkness. Sans tended to hit the break a little too hard for stoplights and stop signs, but thankfully there wasn’t much traffic to worry about anyway. Your mind started to wander, letting the sounds of the drive lull your thoughts as your eyes drifted from person to person on the sidewalks.

A flash of purple caught your attention outside.

You blinked, tilting your head to better see what the purple was. It looked like a purple light, wait no… a thread, hanging across the road. Your eyebrows knitted together, confused at why there would be a glowing thread. Sans didn’t seem to notice it, driving right into it- or apparently through it.

The purple thread passed right through the glass, metal, Sans, and the chair like it was nothing but a ghost. You reflexively reached up in front of yourself, catching the purple thread-

“-recall you reading something by an Einstein describing exactly this?” Gaster wildly motioned to the left of you as if he was half way though an argument. Wait, weren’t you on the left side? You looked out the window to the right of you, remembering being on the other side of the car, and looked back at him confused. “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results? Do tell me you have- … Human, what is wrong?” He asked, his voice shifting and echoing unnaturally. Your vision swam as the noise grew in volume around you.

“I…” You felt light headed as the world seemed to spin slightly.

“Vertebae?” Sans asked quietly, voice echoing despite the volume. You blinked and shook your head, trying to make sense of what was going on. You felt your heart racing, and your stomach tighten.

“What…” You opened your hand, and everything was back to normal. You were in the left seat, Gaster was calmly looking out of the window on the right side. No conversation was being made.

“Pull over.” You grabbed Sans’ shoulder from behind, putting your other hand to your mouth.

“What? Right now? We-” He asked, but your grip tightened and you leaned forward, trying to keep your breathing steady. You felt the car veer over and slow down, and you immediately unbuckled and stepped out of the almost-stopped car onto the median strip, and promptly vomited.

“What happened?” Gaster asked, appearing behind you quickly. You were breathing hard with your hands on your knees, but the wave of nausea seemed to have completely vanished. Sans was slower to get out of the car, parking it horribly on the median. Luckily this must have been perfect timing, since these streets were mostly clear of other cars at the moment.

“I touched… I touched a purple thread.” You said, swallowing and shaking your head.

“Here?” Sans asked, confusion heavy in his voice.

“It… was in the middle of the road, you drove right through it.” You took a moment, before slowly standing up. Gaster’s eyes trailed around, frowning slightly.

“Now, that cannot be a good sign.” He said. Sans nodded in agreement.

“Are you okay or…?” He stepped up to you, silently offering to revise the plan. You shook your head.

“I’m okay now… Just really, really confused.” You motioned to the car. “Come on, let’s keep moving before we attract any attention.” You quickly said and headed towards the car, though the brothers were less sure about your decision.

They got into the car and buckled up, but Sans took a moment to look back at you. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

You nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. The… whatever that was… must have just passed through me. It’s like it never happened.” You confirmed, and Sans thought a moment before pulling off of the median.

“Maybe to you… but your breath probably isn’t going to be the best. Hey bro.” Sans got the attention of Gaster. “Look around below the seats real quick, see if you can find any alcohol.” Gaster nodded and looked, but you stared at Sans with wide eyes.

“What?”

“The bouncer isn’t going to like the smell of vomit, but alcohol they’d be used to.” He reasoned, and you figured he was right. Gaster eventually found a bottle of Rumple Minze, and he passed it to you.

“... Why would a robot have alcohol?” You asked, taking the bottle and giving it a look.

“He likes the aesthetic.” Sans half laughed, looking at you through the mirror. He saw you hesitate. “Just enough to mask the smell. I know you aren’t that much of a lightweight.” He tried lighting the mood. You nodded, and took a swig from the bottle- and immediately used all of your willpower to not spit out the peppermint flavored liquor.

You struggled to swallow it, and immediately stuck out your tongue and made a face. If Metatton had an aesthetic he could at least make it a good tasting one. “It tastes like bad mouthwash.” You said with a heavy frown. Sans laughed a little, and even Gaster had a slight chuckle at your displeasure. You rubbed your tongue against your teeth, trying to lift the taste away.

After a little longer of driving, Sans started to slow down.

“Looks like this is the place.” Sans said, pulling over to a building you’ve never seen before. You could feel the bass of the music through the closed door, and see the flashing lights through the tall windows.

Two large guys standing in the entrance were wearing dark shirts with the [M-M] logo on it, yelling at a human and monster couple that looked like they were trying to get in. One of the men pointed to the ‘NO MONSTERS’ sign, and the couple finally left.

“... Yeah, looks like it.” You swallowed, still tasting the mint alcohol on your tongue.

“I’ll be across the road, if you guys need me. Just grab me when you can.” Sans pointed to the other side of the road, and Gaster examined the sidewalk a bit before nodding.

“You know where I will be.” Gaster gave a slight bow to you while sitting, and promptly melted away into the darkness of the car.

You took a moment, looking at the bar. You really didn’t want to go in there. You really didn’t.

But you needed to know.

You stepped out of the car, and towards the music.

Don’t Forget - Sans x Gaster (Human AU)

Chapter Five - Saturday

It was eleven in the morning when Sans finally woke up. He stayed in his pajamas; it was Saturday, so he didn't have to get dressed. After groggily dragging himself through a half-assed morning routine, Sans flopped back on his bed, and closed his eyes. Breathe in... Breathe out.

When he'd been brushing his teeth, he almost didn't recognize himself in the mirror. He dragged his hand down his face at the very thought of it. He was eighteen, but the bags under his eyes, and the frown lines made him look at least ten years older than he actually was. Needless to say, this is why he didn't look in the mirror more often. Sans could hear Papyrus already up for the day, playing with his action figures next door in his room. Sans found that a small smile was tugging at his lips. Right... Life wasn't all that bad.

That being said, his wrists began to itch, and taunt him. He was about to reach for the blade before Papyrus had opened the door. "Morning, lazybones!"

"Oh, mornin', bro." Sans said, slipping the razor back under the mattress as stealthily as he could, as to not trigger any curiosity from Papyrus about what he was doing. "How did you sleep, Freckles?"

"Good, as always." Papyrus replied, almost proudly.

"That's good." Sans said. He stood up, walking over to his brother before they both walked out the room. Sans closed his door behind him. "I'm gonna go make pancakes for breakfast, you go play with your action figures, alright?"

Papyrus nodded excitedly, and Sans swore to himself that if his baby brother were a puppy, he'd constantly be wagging his tail with eagerness and excitement for each day. "Okie dokie!" He ran to his room, getting a bit too excited, and slamming the door behind him. Sans shook his head, sighing. Sometimes, he wished he had as much energy as Papyrus.

He dragged himself down the stairs, still tired and barely awake. It was weird. No amount of sleep seemed to help, as if there was a cloud of fatigue perpetually wrapped around him. He yawned. Twelve hours of sleep, and it did nothing. Great.

~~~~~~~~~~

The scientist slammed his hand down on his alarm clock. Nope, too fucking early. Fuck that. He rolled onto his side letting out an annoyed sigh. He wasn't gonna be able to fall back asleep. After lying there for what had to be an extra ten minutes, he finally dragged himself out of bed. A yawn escaped him as he walked to his dresser, and got dressed. He buttoned his shirt up, zipped his pants and buttoned them, tied his shoes, and made his way to his kitchen.

He had made coffee as soon as he had gotten home last night, so that he wouldn't have to make it this morning. Three spoons of sugar, and two spoons of creamer later, the hot, caffeinated drink was making its way down his throat. The burn of the liquid didn't bother him anymore from years of drinking it so soon after it had finished brewing. Most people would have scalded their mouths.

The 'weather' outside was as nice as usual, at least from what he could see out his window. People were rushing from place to place, men, women, children; the community was sure busy on such a nice Saturday morning. He supposed some people didn't have Saturdays off, the children had school friends to visit, and the other people were just enjoying their weekend. He closed the curtain again before checking the time. Eleven forty-five. Almost noon.

He sat down in his study, the picture frame with his brothers' pictures in it still facing away from him. He flipped the frame around again, looking at the picture for a few moments. The conversation he had with Sans about them popped up in his mind. He had waited months after meeting the King to tell him about his dead brothers, and with Sans, he'd only known him for a little over a week. It was confusing. What was it about Sans that made him so special that Gaster, who was usually a very well guarded person, dropped his walls around him after spending barely two days collected time with him in the week that he had known him? Gaster frowned.

His phone rang at around two in the afternoon, and he checked the caller ID. Sans. The Royal Scientist picked up, putting the phone to his ear and clearing his throat. "Hello?"

"Heya." Came Sans' voice over the line. "Are you free today?"

He was in fact free today, but for a few seconds he hesitated to answer. "I don't have any plans today." He answered. His voice shook a little, and he wasn't sure why. He cleared his throat again.

"Would you like to come over and hang out?" Sans asked.

Had to word this right. "Sure." Simple, to the point. That response would do.

"Alright. See ya soon?"

See you soon." Gaster confirmed.

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye."

Click.

~~~~~~~~~~

If you asked Gaster how he ended up hiding behind Sans' couch with a toy Nerf gun, and two 'bullets' left, he wouldn't have been able to tell you. All he knew was the small, red-headed child named Undyne had already taken Sans and Papyrus out, and he was about to be next. "Come out here and fight me like a man, nerd!!"

"No, thank you!" Gaster called out. He shot blindly, with no aim to guide him in hitting his target; a five foot tall teenager with too much bravado.

"Missed me, dweeb!" Undyne said before cackling. Gaster peaked his head above the couch for a moment, catching glimpse of his friend and his little brother 'dead' on the floor.

"C'mon, G, you can take her down!" Sans said.

"Brother, dead people don't talk!!" Papyrus said.

"Papyrus, be quiet, man. Dead people don't talk."

Gaster could imagine the facial expression Papyrus had right now as the young boy stammered and then growled, obviously frustrated and defeated. "Both of ya, can it." Undyne said. She shot them both in the forehead and they both swiftly shut up.

Right, one 'bullet' left. Had to make this one count- Oh, too late. Undyne walked over to the couch and shoved the barrel of the toy gun down the space Gaster was hiding in and popped him right between the eyes. "Looks like she got ya, Gast." Sans chimed in.

Undyne grinned toothily.  "Let's play again, I like this game."

"I'm too tired to keep playing, kid." Sans said. Papyrus sat up.

"We can go play with guns by ourselves, Undyne!!" He offered.

"Alright, but don't cry when I kick your butt!" Undyne exclaimed.

The kids ran upstairs, and Gaster came out from behind the couch, sitting next to Sans, who looked tired. "Man, I'm beat."

Gaster leaned back. "She sure has a lot of energy." He said. He checked the time. Only eight P.M. He thought it would have been later.

"They both do. They're probably gonna both have a lot of energy well into adult life. Lucky them."

"What do you mean, 'lucky them'?" Gaster asked.

"I'm eighteen, and I feel like I'm thirty." Sans chuckled. "I've been working to support myself and my brother for the past twelve years, basically since he was a newborn. I guess it's all starting to add up."

Gaster felt of pang of empathy in his chest, but suppressed the feeling before it could linger and ruin his mood entirely. "I am really curious... Where are your parents?" He asked.

Sans shrugged. "I have no idea. I can't remember who they were, what happened to them, their names... As if they never even existed." He sighed. "It's just been me and Paps for as long as I can remember. I was lucky to have even remembered what I did. Our names, birthdays. My furthest memory is waking up on the edge of the forest, with Papyrus bundled up in a blanket in my arms. Trudging through a snow storm until I reached this town..."

Gaster kept his eyes trained on Sans' expression as his younger friend trailed off his sentence. It was a bit hard to read Sans with his hair covering his other eye the way it did, and the fact that he didn't seem like the open book type of person. Sans had caught Gaster staring, and looked at him with a confused expression, before Gaster turned his attention to a different area of the room. "It sounds like you had a rough childhood."

"I never really had a childhood."

As much as the scientist wanted to say something to make Sans feel better, he felt like that kind of blind optimism would spite him, and even turn him into a bawling mess in front of the other. "I can see where you're coming from."

Sans suddenly had a smile on his face. "Yeah, but I got used to it, so it's all whatever. I'm bored. Wanna watch a movie?"

Gaster blinked. What a sudden change of attitude... "Uh, yeah, a movie sounds cool."

The younger male stood up and walked over to the television before popping a tape in the VCR and rewinding the movie. Gaster couldn't shake the feeling that Sans was bothered by that subject, and had been faking that smile. As the movie played, Gaster found his mind wandering. The movie didn't look that interesting, anyways...

~~~~~~~~~~

By the time the movie had ended, it was decided that it was much too late for Gaster to walk home. When Sans had offered the taller male his bed, Gaster denied and said he would be fine on the couch. "Are you sure? That couch is really uncomfortable."

"Even more reason for me to sleep on the couch while you stay in your bed." Gaster replied.

"Yeah, but, you're the guest. Aren't guests usually supposed to get special treatment?" Sans asked. Gaster waved him off dismissively.

"I'll be fine, really." Gaster insisted.

"Okay, well, I'm at least gonna get you a spare blanket and some pillows." Sans said.

Sans turned and went up the stairs whilst Gaster tried to make himself comfortable. Jeez, he wasn't lying about it being uncomfortable. This was gonna be like that time he had fallen asleep at his desk in the lab after pulling more hours than usual, due to the winter holidays putting him behind schedule. Asgore had of course scolded him for not taking care of himself, and going home to sleep. This couch was probably gonna put a bigger knot in his back and neck than the desk had.

Sans returned with pillows and blankets, and set them on the end of the couch. "If you need a drink, there's cups in the cabinet above the sink. You remember where the bathroom is, right?"

"End of the hall on the second floor, next to your room." Gaster said.

"Good night, Gaster."

"Good night, Sans."

Sans went back up the stairs, and Gaster got himself re-situated on the couch. He took his glasses off, setting them on the arm of the couch before closing his eyes, and eventually drifting to sleep.

Sans flopped back on his bed. He couldn't really place what it was exactly that he was feeling, and he wasn't so sure he wanted to know. All he knew was, for once in his life, he at least wasn't going to bed miserable.

((This chapter was kind of fun to write tbh.

If you draw any fan art, it can be sent to me here on Tumblr. If you wanna talk, feel free to message me. I don't really have anything to do so I'll probably answer your message.

- Felix))

oh hey how about Alphys and Sans' chat in your "When Life Hands You Enantiomers" fic for that fic meta ask?

OH MAN so this was my first Undertale fic ever!  I originally started noodling around with writing Sans and Alphys genfic for Yuletide, the small fandom exchange that happens every Christmas – at the time of nominations, Undertale was still a small fandom! and I got into it during the writing period, so I hadn’t thought to ask for or offer it.

I’d wanted to write a treat, but I ended up looking at all the Undertale requests and none of them quite were what I wanted to write, which was mostly chemistry puns and friendship.  So I wrote it, figured I might gift it to someone if it happened to suit their letter, and… it didn’t, really?  I figured I’d just post it.

Anyway, that’s the fic background.  Onward!

“You look like you need a break,” he said, decisively, going past her into the lab.  He paused at her desk, evidently looking for somewhere to put the box of donuts and finding nothing but her vast mountains of clutter.  "I like what you’ve done with the place,“ he said finally.

Basically this was my dad’s reaction to my first apartment every time I tried to show him how clever I’d been making furniture out of cardboard boxes.  Eventually I got sick of responding with “oh fuck off” and made him drive me to Ikea to get a desk.

“It’s, uh.  S-sorry, it’s kind of a mess.  I’m just really busy with – with Royal Scientist stuff?” she finished hopefully.  "You – you know how it is, I g-guess.“

"Yeah,” he said, tonelessly.

and this is the start of me not being able to decide whether or not Alphys remembers that Sans used to work with Gaster in some capacity in this fic!  I think I eventually decided it comes and it goes.  I like to keep things ambiguous on the topic of What The Fuck Is Even Up With Sans??? in my non-AU Undertale fics – I find the ambiguity interesting, I like that everyone has their own theories, and other people have covered that ground better and more thoroughly than I will.

“Anyway,” he said, a lot more brightly, “let’s relax and have some donuts.”  He pulled a picnic blanket from literally nowhere and spread it out on the floor of the lab.

So one of the things I appreciate about writing from Alphys’ POV is that it feels completely tonally appropriate to have her say she facepalmed, or use the phrase “literally nowhere,” and other diction I guess I associate more with informal internet communication.

“Does, uh.  Does Muffet know you made off with all her donuts?” Alphys asked.

“Eh,” said Sans, waving a hand dismissively.

Again, I really like leaving Sans’ bullshit ambiguous, and kind of shady.

“So.  You still working on that horrible tile puzzle?”

“It’s.  …yeah!  It’s going really well.  It's….”  She sighed.

“You’re stuck, aren’t you?” Sans asked.

“Yeah,” she admitted.

“You know you don’t have to do it, right?” he said.  "I mean… Papyrus knows you must be really busy, he’s not gonna be upset.  Plus, I have to say, I’m not real excited about fishing him out of the middle of it if he gets stuck on a puzzle.“

I like how Sans assumes Alphys’ real concern is letting Papyrus down.

"Ha,” she said, joylessly.  "F-funny you should mention the, uh, fishing.“

To her horror, he took this entirely the wrong way.  "Aw, come on, Undyne’s not gonna hold it against you either,” he said.

“N-no, that’s, that’s n-n-not what I –”  Words failed her and she just buried her face in her hands for a moment.

“Although, now that I mention it, Undyne did seem kinda worried about you,” he said.  "You’re not answering your phone, or something?  She said maybe you were mad at her.“

"Oh no,” said Alphys, diving for her phone.  Those four texts.  "Augh, I am the worst kind of trash, I’m a terrible friend, I c-can’t do anything right!“ she moaned.

Oh god.  Please tell me I’m not the only person who leaves texts unread because what if I forget to respond to them when the notification is gone? and then don’t ever look at them out of crushing guilt and anxiety, until people start to worry.  Please.

(Another note on diction: I actually really, really don’t like it when people call themselves “trash.”  I grew up unironically – and really shittily – using the phrase “white trash” to describe certain cousins of mine, and it’s too loaded down with those classist connotations for me to read it as just harmless self-deprecation.  This may just be because I am An Old, though.  Anyway, Alphys uses it – and it’s definitely how she actually thinks of herself – so I kind of gritted my teeth and used it too.)

Sans was managing to make a perma-grin look dismayed.

I have to say, I was impressed with the unhappy-smiling Sans sprites in the game!  I try not to ever describe Sans as frowning, but probably something’s slipped through at some point in the vrillion words of fic I’ve written.

She brought up the texts, ignoring him for the moment.

hey, was wondering if you wanna do a human history movie night with me and Pap tomorrow???

Then the next day:

super last minute, sorry.  watched Cooking w/Killer Robot marathon.  maybe next week? something w/giant swords??? YEAH!!!!!

And then:

Is everything ok?  Miss you.

And finally:

Did I do something wrong?

"Oh no,” she moaned.

“That bad, huh,” he said, sympathetically.

“Oh nooo,” she repeated.  "Oh no, oh no, now she probably thinks I’m terrible and –“

"Alphys.  Wow.  Relax,” said Sans.  "I came over to check on you and make sure you hadn’t been, I don’t know, eaten by lab rats or something.“

Sometime I really need to write the companion piece to this, where Papyrus and Undyne come up with this terrible idea for a puzzle.  And I have to work in a scene where Undyne is worried about Alphys and goes from dashing off carefully carefree-seeming texts to VERY CAREFULLY PUNCTUATED TEXTS BECAUSE WHAT IF ALPHYS THINKS SHE’S A BIG DUMB LUNK??? but it never occurs to her that Alphys might be anxious about replying to her.

"Eaten?!?” she asked.  Did he… did he know?  Augh, when had she last fed the amalgamates, anyway?  Two days ago, maybe?  Ugh, that was too long, they were going to be all grumpy when she went downstairs next.  She tried to keep breathing and not panic.

He held up his hands to pacify her.  "Hey.  Hey.  I don’t know why but everything I say’s making you panic.“  He nudged the box towards her.  "Look, have a donut.  Everything’s better with donuts.  It’ll make you feel hole again.”

Hole puns are the hole reason I included donuts in this fic.

Alphys winced despite herself, then sighed.  "Okay, yeah.  Sorry.  I’m.  It’s – it’s been a hard few days.“

"Yeah?” he asked.

She nibbled at the donut half-heartedly.  "So uh.  You mentioned the tile puzzle thing?  I’m having trouble with the piranhas.“

Sans snorted.  "I’m sorry, just  – there are piranhas?  Why are there piranhas?”

“They were in the specs Undyne gave me!” Alphys said, trying not to get defensive.

“Sounds very fishy to me,” said Sans.  "Anyway, why not just make robot piranhas?  I mean, that’s your forte, isn’t it?“

man, Alphys hasn’t told Sans about anything in this fic, and he apparently doesn’t tell her about anything either.  I like how they’re friends who lie their faces off to each other on the regular.

Oh god, robot piranhas would be about ten times worse.  "It’s not making the actual piranhas, as such,” said Alphys.  "It’s getting them to distinguish between lemon scent and orange scent.  Because, see, the request was to make sure they go after anyone who smells like oranges but be repelled by anyone who smells like lemons.“

Sans stared for a moment, and then, to her dismay, started laughing.  "What?  What?  You’re serious.  Oh man, I bet Papyrus came up with that one.  He’s – he’s pretty picky about his cleaning products, I guess that little difference is important to him.”  His grin widened a little.  "Papyrus is so great at those little details, you know?“

He’s laughing, but this praise of his brother is totally in earnest.  Sans may be the one who pays the bills, but I’m pretty sure Papyrus is the only reason their house isn’t disgusting.

"Sans, this isn’t f-funny!” said Alphys.  "Have you ever tried to train killer fish to distinguish between d-limonene and l-limonene when all they care about is smelling blood?!?  Because I have!“

"Yeah, that sounds like one l of a problem,” said Sans.  "A terrible knot you have to d-tangle.  Orange you glad I stopped by?“

"Sans,” said Alphys, beginning to lose patience.

There are several naming conventions for enantiomers, and originally this was S-limonine and R-limonine, with corresponding puns (I forget what they were, I just remember it was a pain in the ass coming up with new puns) but I think I googled and the d- and l- notation was more popular for limonene.

Like I’ve said elsewhere, this whole fic was largely an excuse for chemistry puns.

“It sounds like you need this problem like a fish needs a by… cyclohexane!  Lemon know if you think of anything I can do to help.”

“Sans,” she said.  It was starting to become more of a whine.

“Citrus me, I got this.  I don’t rind helping you at all,” he said, because he was a merciless bag of bones.

She glowered at him.  Then she took the box of donuts away from him.

CAN YOU BLAME HER THOUGH.

“Hey!  I was eating those!” he protested.

“Tough,” she said.  When he leaned over to try and reach them, she harrumphed and stood up.  Getting to his feet was apparently too much for Sans, because after one last halfhearted sitting lunge, he gave up and sat serenely on the picnic blanket.

Alphys carefully balanced the box of donuts on top of a stack of papers on her desk, then slid an empty mug underneath it for added support.

If you have never done this with a stack of papers, ….I envy your tidiness.  And if you’ve never done that dumbass thing where you try to lunge for a thing just out of your reach and then try to spontaneously develop telekinesis to bring it over to you… you’re fucking lying.

With a few keystrokes, she brought her computer out of sleep mode and was drawing up her data on the piranhas.  "I’m not really sure h-how you can help?“ she said.  "I-I mean, if you can it’d be great, obviously, b-but… don’t you do, uh, physics?”  Her memories were kind of fuzzy on this.  Why did she know Sans again?  When had she met him?  It wasn’t that important, was it?  Everyone knew Sans.

AND AGAIN, I can’t decide what Alphys knows about Sans in this fic.

“Yeah, but, everything’s physics in the end, right?” Sans said, a shrug in his voice.

She finished her donut before saying, wryly, “That’s what physicists tell themselves.  I g-guess if it helps you sleep at night…”

For whatever reason I was fortunate not to hear this much from the physics majors in school.  (The math majors, on the other hand….)  But I’ve seen them do it a lot on the internet and so I have to admit I’m kind of fond of writing chemists and biologists being dismissive about it.

“I sleep all the time,” Sans said cheerfully.  She wondered if he was ever going to get up and come over here eventually.

“Undyne has mentioned,” she said.  "So, uh, w-what exactly do you think is so physics-y here?“

"Well.  It’s not so much the physics, I guess,” he said.  "It’s just that I’m really good at cheating.“

She reached absently for another donut, opening the box without looking at it and reaching inside.  Her claws closed on something rubbery, and before she could stop, it was making a ridiculous farting noise.

She pulled the whoopee cushion out of the box, and turned to look at Sans.  He hadn’t moved an inch from where she’d left him, and was snacking on a donut he definitely hadn’t had before.

She sighed.  "Y-yeah, I can see that.”

I think at this point I’d seen a lot of Sans-being-badass art, and kind of wanted someone to react to him with an eyeroll.  Not that I don’t think Sans isn’t badass!  Just, you gotta have that one friend who will call you on your bullshit.

She turned back to her computer screen and skimmed the data she had on her attempts at training the piranhas.  Ugh.  No statistically significant difference between any of the training methods she’d attempted and the control groups.

Sometimes she wished science worked more like it was presented in fiction: less waiting around for something to happen, more moments of genius and day-saving.  On the other hand, as it turned out, horrific abominations of science were a real thing.  Who knew?

notice how I carefully avoid references to specific anime!  because I’d pretty much only watched Ouran High School Host Club in full!  I think I remember double-checking with @thinkatoryprocess that horrific abominations of science was a thing in anime?

I have since learned many things about Fullmetal Alchemist, and in particular why I wasn’t supposed to watch it just after my dog had died.

“So, h-how exactly were you thinking of cheating?”  Her mind wandered to some of those weird diagrams she’d come across deep in the lab files, presumably belonging to the previous Royal Scientist.  "Are you thinking, um, t-time travel?  Because if I could find some way to breed selectively for citrus recognition they could evolve to–“

MY THIRD INSTANCE of “what the fuck does Alphys even know?  why bother making it consistent?”

"No,” said Sans, and she leaped back with a squeak of shock, because suddenly he was standing right next to her and he was speaking in a freaky hollow voice, and also the light in his eyes had gone totally dark and, and, what the fuck, Sans?!?  "…Heh, sorry,“ he said, and the little glowing dots returned, and the grin looked more natural.  "Just.  Trust me.  Time travel, not a good idea.”

She knew she shouldn’t ask, but she kind of had to.  "…Why?“

"Time flies,” said Sans.  When she frowned at him, he added, “They’re even more annoying than fruit flies.  And they get stuck in your teeth if you go faster than light.  It’s a real problem.”

Okay, yeah, she wasn’t gonna get a straight answer out of a guy who wore bedroom slippers everywhere he teleported.  Fair enough.

This last sentence is still one of my favorite summations of Sans as a character.

“Out of curiosity,” he said, “why didn’t you make robot piranhas?”

“Ugh,” she said.  "You know, I thought about it?  B-but then I’d have to invent the scent organs and I’m n-not sure I’m up to it.“  She wasn’t up to a lot of things, honestly.  She wasn’t sure why Asgore hadn’t noticed.  Or Undyne.  She was really surprised Sans hadn’t noticed, though.  He was weirdly observant.

So I did like no research on robots for this.  IIRC machines that do something similar to smelling are a thing, but I have no idea how they work.

"Nah,” said Sans.  "Just think lazy!“

A favorite motto of my boss, weirdly enough.

"But I don’t want to leave the piranhas out!  Then Undyne and your b-brother will be d-disappointed and I won’t be the ‘g-great Dr. Alphys’ anymore, I’ll just be a f-fraud.  They s-specifically requested piranhas!”

“So give ‘em piranhas,” said Sans.  "But play to your strengths.“

"I d-don’t know that I have any strengths,” she pointed out.

“Sure you do.  I mean, right now you’ve only been using biology.  Maybe you wanna get down to the nuts and bolts of the matter.  You made Mettaton, right?” he said.  She tried not to wince.  "And if you can make that guy a star, you’ve gotta be good.  Plus, I can’t help but notice you’re, uh, pretty good with optics.“

She blushed.  "The c-cameras?  They’re for – uh, for scientific observation?” she said.

“Riiight,” said Sans.  "I know what you’re up to.  You just wanna steal all my best knock-knock jokes, don’t you?“

"There’s no s-sound!” she insisted, but Sans was chuckling.  "…is that what you do at the door all day?“ she asked, frowning.  "I just thought you were, uh.  T-testing the structural integrity of the door.  And… talking to someone?”

“Nah,” said Sans.  "Who would I be talking to?“

"On the other side of the d-door?” she suggested.

both of these people, liars.  I’m not sure Sans will be wholly surprised to find out Alphys didn’t make Mettaton, but the robot body’s still pretty damn impressive.  And in the true pacifist ending Alphys didn’t seem real surprised there was someone behind that door.

He shrugged.  "Anyway.  Just some suggestions.  But if you wanna give up… hey, I can’t blame ya.  Papyrus will recover from his disappointment.  Undyne probably knew it was a crazy idea in the first place.“  He reached around her to grab another donut.  "Anyway, I gotta go on my lunch break before she finds out I’m slacking off here.  Text her back, though, she seemed pretty worried.  And try to do it before she and my bro burn the house down with her stress-spaghetti-ing?”

And obviously when all else fails, Sans’ go-to solutions are 1. taking a break, and 2. giving up.  Not always in that order.

“Thanks,” said Alphys, half-heartedly.  She turned to ask another question, but found she was sitting in an empty room.  "…I think.  …well, hey, at least I have donuts.“

Having donuts means she’s definitely better off than where she was at the beginning of the fic!  Also I appreciate Sans having the ability to just vanish, because for whatever reason describing people walking to the door and saying “goodbye” is really boring to me and always trips me up.

Chapter 16: Bad intentions...?

In which Sans questions everything about you.

*Sans's POV*

Calm down, Sans.

You got this.

You...

Fuck.

My brother and (Y/N) were cooking in the kitchen while I was freaking out in the couch, thinking why I had a burst out when she told me she worked at science. It's not the first scientist I've met, so there was no reason to become THAT enthusiastic about it. Considering that she's probably a science nerd and that she has multiple problems I have as well, we may be pretty similar. Thing that scares me, needless to say. Besides, one day I heard her ringtone and it was Sweet Child O' Mine, which it's an incredible taste in music. I do like rock as well, so... this is freaking me out. A lot.

One of the reasons I'm probably feeling weird around her is the fact that she's someone new. I've known the monsters in the Underground all my life, no new relationships haven't been made since years. The kid, Frisk, turned out to be a fucking bitch, so we can't consider it as a relationship, even. Emily, well, she shared my passion for books, so that may be something. But (Y/N)? She's becoming closer and closer every time she comes here, which it's scary. I've never been good at making friends. Yes, I'm not afraid to talk to new people, but making friends? Oh, that's just letting my vulnerabilities show.

Even if (Y/N) knows I have depression and all that stuff, she doesn't know the reasons- that's the intimate part. I could even tell everyone in the world that I have these mental problems, but tell them the backstory of it? That's a huge step I'll never take with anyone. I mean, Papyrus doesn't know it, for God's sake! How can I risk myself more and more?!

More friendships mean more reasons to speak out loud, which it's what I don't want to do. The worst thing is that Frisk and Flowey know exactly why I have these things, that's why I can't show my problems to them. If they get to know I'm really traumatized of what they've done, they will torment me with that 'till the rest of my life...

Which reminds me- why she hasn't reset? Is she really thinking that we, finally, have the right to have a normal life out of the Underground? Nope, I don't think so. It's stupid to think she had a change of heart, less if Flowey can be inciting her into doing it again. Then why? Has she... Did she lose her power? The power to reset it all? To have the world in the tip of her fingers?

Wow, the laws of physics are just huge fuckers. I mean, they let the power of time and space to an irresponsible teenager, bored of having a normal life and trying to make it more interesting every time. Did they just realize it was a mistake? How funny.

I have suffered a lot, taking in consideration that two kids have power over me. No matter how much I train. No matter how old I get. They'll always have the power to change it all, in a way that their immature minds think it's correct. How stupid they can be? Do they think this is all a fucking videogame?! Just because they know they will come back from death...

They fear no man.

They fear nothing.

Just the fact that someone can take the power away from them.

But that's never gonna happen...

Or am I wrong?

A new timeline, new things to discover. And I must say that everything in this new world I've been dragged along is confusing to me. The thought that I won't necessarily live in Snowdin, that I can meet new faces, that I can finish a career...

That I can fall in love with a different face.

Is this even real?

How have I become so free in a matter of seconds?

Now I have the power to decide over my future, to run away, to breathe fresh air, feel the sun, and watch the stars. The real stars; the ones I always wanted to see as a kid. Thinking about it, Frisk had mercy this time. Or curiosity took over, who knows? This is the first 'Pacifist' timeline she has ever done, the ones before it were either neutral or... genocidal.

...

I'm afraid I can be wrong, though.

There's a thing called "True Reset"- a reset than only the... player of this goddamn videogame will remember. Not even I would remember anything about it... or the other timelines before it. There's a probability that Frisk has done it, but I still don't know...

The first timeline I remember was a neutral one, in which Frisk seemed scared. TRULY scared, like if she was going to collapse at any moment. It would make no sense that it wasn't her first time there- why would she fake kindness? At first, she was a good kid, I admit it. Now, she's not my friend anymore. Because she broke her promise- OUR promise, and give a shit about it. She knows why I hate her, and she just laughs it off.

sHe'S A bITCh.

She... she turned into a soulless being. Not literally, but morally. She gave up and decided to take her fucking rage and need for something new on us. Like if we were nothing. To her, we are probably just the characters of some cheap videogame: repetitive, boring, predictable, and insensible. But she's wrong- oh, she's so fucking wrong. We are not repetitive, we all have different stories to tell, our own problems, hopes, and dreams. We cry when we lose someone, we laugh when we hear a joke. We hate, we help, we can make other people's lives miserable, just as she did. We are able to do all of that, and more. Because there's a difference between her and us- and that's love. She may have LOVE, but we... we love...

We love other people, we love our families, and we help each other. Because we fucking care about everything.

Even Gaster.

Even me.

...

Are other humans different?

Is (Y/N) different?

Does she care? Does she help? Does she...

Does she love?

Or is she the new player of this game?

Is she the new person that will ruin my life?

Or the one that will improve it?

It's so confusing to me to realize that people can be different. Frisk... she's a human, I know, But does that mean that they are all the same? I truly don't think so. There are people so genuine, with no need to hide identities because they know it's no use. (Y/N) seems truly genuine...

She cares.

She helps.

And she loves.

She fights for her own hopes, dreams, and deals with her problems. She has a story to tell, that not all people will hear.

Frisk has that as well, but it's different.

Someone so blindly open-minded can't be bad. I need to convince myself to not question her anymore. To not question (Y/N) anymore.

She can be good.

She has been good so far.

I have nothing to object.

She's been nice to Papyrus, to my... parents, to Undyne, Alphys, Mettaton...

She's been nice to Frisk, even when she doesn't know all the fucking horrible things she has done.

She's been nice to Flowey, even though he usually acts as a picky bitch.

She's been all nice and supportive to me, even though she doesn't know. She doesn't know a fucking thing of what's going on, but there's the thing. If I had the courage enough to tell her right now, she would hear it. And not all people have that courage- to listen to others and help them out. To be a good friend.

Is...

How is this girl so lonely, again?

She deals daily with herself, a thing that breaks her a lot in the inside. No one is there to shut the hell up that little voice of her head. To tell her that she'll be okay if she gets help...

She doesn't even receive fucking help.

But...

Her enemy is the world around her? Or is her mind the true villain?

I checked the chat we both had some minutes before she arrived, and I sighed. Her life seems so... perfect on the outside. A smile in her face, a kind tone in her voice, a good career, a prodigy mind, and an easy way to make someone feel at ease. She, however, is never feeling at ease. that makes her imperfect, though? What does perfect even mean? To have a life full of roses? To have your job dream? To be happy no matter what?

I remembered that I, no matter how many times put Frisk as the bad of the story, am not perfect. I'm far from being a perfect person, I'm truly broken...

I'm a fucking mess that constantly bothers people. That hurts them, that breaks the promises with them, and that is really selfish. My mind thinks that I know the problems they have, but I don't. I don't know Frisk's past, I don't know Gaster's reasons to hate me, I don't know why Flowey changed his attitude so... suddenly. I...

I don't know (Y/N)'s story.

And she doesn't know mine.

Not even Papyrus know the half of it, and that's just... stupid.

He trusts me with his deeper struggles, his own dreams, and his wildest aspirations. Things that only I get to know because he trusts me. But...

Do I really want to ruin his innocence?

How would he react if he knew I watched him turn to dust...?

I... I feel really guilty about those timelines- Genocide runs. I had to wait until Frisk killed a lot of monsters to actually do something...

I'm weak. One hp, one of defense.

tHe eASIeSt eNEmY.

In order to gain power, I had to wait until my ability, "Karma", was activated. The more she killed, the more "Karma" I gain. And in the end, I was able to stop her only 'cause of the weight of her sins. "Karma" is like a counterattack, making the sinner pay for all they've done. Awfully, that characteristic is also pretty similar to the videogames' features.

I...

I wasn't this weak before. I was really strong and able to protect Papyrus before I lost all HOPE, which it's the equivalent of "HP". My defense dropped as well, making me more vulnerable than ever. That, however, happened before the kid fell down...

Gaster is a huge factor in my depression as well. He makes me think I'm worthless, doubtful and a disappointment. He treats me like that since years ago, and I totally hate it. He just keeps telling me that I never was there for anyone, but I'm sure that's not true. I care about Papyrus and, secretly, about the others as well. The only ones I don't care about are Frisk, Flowey, and him. But he thinks I'm all careless and I don't give a shit, when in fact, I'm one of the most worried in the group.

I went to my room and closed the door behind me, then flopped right onto my bed. I supervised the room with a glance and noticed how different it is from the one in the Underground. Now I have a proper bed, a bigger desk where a new laptop resides in, a functional lamp ('cause the one in the Underground wasn't), a smaller self-sustaining tornado and... it is a bit less messy. The color of the walls is dark blue (almost black) and the furniture is dark brown, as well as the floor. It is a nice change of scenario, I guess.  I tried to make it as different as possible from the one I had before because it only brings me bad memories. Papyrus helped in the major decoration, though- I need to thank him for that.

The similarity, though, is that I have a window above my bed... and that the balcony is really close to my room. In this house, the balcony is actually closer than in the previous one. I remember that, back in Snowdin, I used to get out in the balcony when everyone was asleep and write peacefully a new chapter for my story. It was such a nice feeling, a moment of calm before school had to begin and TVs started to emit Mettaton's shitty shows.

I laughed quietly, remembering my life before the kid came and depression hit me. It was... far from perfect, but it was better. I worked as a scientist apprentice and I learned a lot. My rank was one of the highest, only one below the Royal Scientist occupation... that my father used to have. I was considered one of the smartest; not only in there but in school as well. I had the highest of grades, even better than Alphys's, and my social life was never bad. I never got in trouble, the teachers respected me, and Papyrus was alright. Thanks to my job and other small ones, I was able to always pay for the house and our necessities...

Papyrus is like three weeks away from becoming a high schooler, and the thought terrifies me. He's so innocent, so... precious to me. I don't want a stupid teenager to ruin that. But... I'm also afraid that others might bully him, because, well... he's a monster. They might even hurt him, and if something ever happens to him, I will never forgive myself.

Never...

"SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" My brother screamed at the top of his lungs... and believe me, you don't want to hear that.

I swear that I jumped some good feet above the ground and fell painfully out of my bed, scared and shocked at the same time. I think one of my ribs cracked, actually. The thing is, that it scared me and hurt me like a bitch, and I groaned loudly after trying to get up.

"papy, ah... wh-what's wrong?" I asked weakly, barely able to keep a balance in my words. My mind was considering shouting curses out loud, but I know that's not the best option.

"THE HUMAN AND I HAVE FINISHED OUR CREATION! IT IS A HOMEMADE RECIPE OF LASAGNA MADE BY (Y/N)!"

"It's actually on the family, Papyrus... I didn't create it"

"STILL! IT IS A RECIPE OF YOUR OWN HEART AND MEMORIES, AND IT MUST MEAN A LOT TO YOU! SO WE CAN CONSIDER YOU AS ONE ITS OWNERS!"

I caught my breath and got up slowly, then I checked my soul. It was as good as always: a white heart upside down, gleaming weakly but still gleaming. I sighed in relief and kinda contented, then I got out of my room, only to be granted by a heavenly smell. I smiled weakly, knowing that it was probably (Y/N)'s influence. I only had one question...

What the fuck is lasagna?

"SANS! PLEASE HELP US SET THE TABLE!" No fucking way, Paps.

"hello papy, how are you? any news lately?" I stupidly said, probably putting a goofy grin in my face.

"SANS, THAT'S THE WORST WAY YOU HAVE AVOIDED A TOPIC IN ALL YOUR LIFE! THAT'S JUST PITIFUL!"

And before I could give him another of my fantastic answers, I heard a loud crash coming from the kitchen.

"HUMAN? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?" Papyrus ran with clear panic in his voice, while I followed him with slow steps full of confusion.

"I'm fine, Papyrus... I think it's not me who you should worry about, though..."

And when I spotted what really happened, I broke out in laughter. An old man, formally known as my father, was laying on the ground after he unsuccessfully teleported into the house. (Y/N) was there in a defensive position and confused as heck. Papyrus tried to stop my laughter, but it didn't work. Who's the disappointment now, Gaster?

"wow, aren't you old?" I smiled widely, feeling mostly euphoric and incapable of reasoning.

"Shut up, Sans"

After a bit of argument and a groaning Papyrus, we finally thought it would be a good idea to start eating. Or well, I did. I was extremely hungry. And the smell wasn't helping either. Besides, why would I want to keep discussing with that annoying man?

We sat and eat then and, as expected, it was amazing. That's what I expected at least. Even (Y/N) seem a little dumbfounded by her own creation, that was probably a familiar recipe.

"is your family from italy or what?" I asked jokingly, and she let out a small and lighthearted laugh.

"Nah, my father just used to like cooking a lot. This a way too old recipe... I think he established it when I was just born"

"really? heh, it's good. was your father a-"

"He just cooked as a hobby, nothing serious. Still, I always liked his homemade food"

Huh.

"and you? do you cook as well or..."

"Nope, I'm too busy for that... and maybe a bit lazy" She laughed quietly, then continued "I tend to only eat fast food during lunch breaks or at nights, nothing more"

I chuckled at the realization that I've done that so many times as well. Mostly not because I'm working, but because I'm ungodly lazy. I remembered all those times I ran away from Papyrus's cooking and head to Grillby's, which was like my second home. Me being a comedian, the bar was an excellent place to make top-quality jokes and friends of the same ranking.

After eating, (Y/N) had to leave, and we had as well. Papyrus never forgot that I had an appointment with a psychologist, and she couldn't stay any longer if she wanted to return at a proper hour. I know she takes the subway, which according to my calculations, is way more annoying and risky than being in a car.

"HUMAN! WE SHALL BE HEADING OFF!"

"Hope it goes well"

"luck at your new job, kiddo"

"Thanks! The best of lucks in your session, Sans. It won't be easy, but you'll eventually get used to it"

"i hope so"

I really do.