#fuck marquis stan
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nyctophobia
chapter 8: trigger
read on ao3 | read on ff.net | spotify playlist | fan cast
summary: think of the biggest hater you know. it's a man, right? prom '05 has finally arrived, and it's about to get uglier than edward cullen up in here...
word count: ~7.7k
warnings: more of the same in previous chapters + blatant sexual tension and flirtatiousness + extra profanity (first "fuck" incoming) + physical violence
thank you so much to everyone who's been following along and being patient with me. I told you it wouldn't take me this long to give y'all another chapter! I just wanna add that I know we all know how the original story that smeyer gave us ends for our princess diana of the twilight saga, but let this be a reminder to have fun and like… live in the moment of the story lol. while we all know how shit goes for lee-lee in canon, this story is still a fanfic. just trust me.
this chapter was masterfully beta-read by @bellasdumptruckass. tytyty so much for taking this chapter from a good 8.5 to an 11. I'm SO proud of how it turned out.
I hope you enjoy the update! show me some love in the comments if you're real <3
tag list (literally just copying and pasting from old posts - pls lmk if you want me to tag/untag you in future nyctophobia posts):
@leahclearwaterdefensesquad @cheerynoir @big-idiot-wolf-boys @the-golden-onion @howlonghaveyoubeenseventeen @phil-dwyer-stan-account @paulxlahotee @edwardsmedow @the-most-pathetic-edge-marquis @effervescent-influenza @gezellig-writes @witchyangela @leahcee @haletwinsstan @musingsofvenus @leahclearwlwater @haemshaems @vampiresarezombies @femmealice @blackpack @bellasoutrageousflavor @tenarcansteponme @me-and-jake @plainjaniedee @renegadepack @manicpixietwilight @emotwilights @jacobyouidiotihadit @edwardsmate4ever @sugarshackpeasant
#nyctophobia#mine#fic#twilight fan fiction#twilight fanfic#twilight fic#twilight fanfiction#leah#leah clearwater#sam#sam uley#leah clearwater x sam uley#emily#emily young#fr tho this chapter eats downnnnnn and y'all need to read it
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I gotta talk about my side character obsession on Journey to Love. Obviously we all adore the main couple, who are perfect.
But after them, we have a whole smorgasbord of supporting cast.
When it comes to the country of An, I stan 1 (one) player and 1 player only: Tongguang/Marquis Chongqing is my main man.
A: He has a female master AND a female henchman. Very sexy of him. We find out he's disciple of Ren Xin who she trained from kid to teen and then the moment he encounters a fellow member of Team Ren Xin he stops murdering her and then comfortably inserts her at his side so they can battle each other like the old days and have cold & calculated assassin talk. I LOVE THAT HE HAS A FEMALE HENCHMAN. That all-buisness swordsman sidekick in dramas is typically a dude.
B. He's using female-coded White Sparrow skills to play spy games in the imperial court. Not just with the noble consort, but it appears he's carefully cultivating stockholm syndrome in the Wu king. (Also possibly making him stronger via the patented Ren Xin break & rebuild disciple training handbook. ???)
C. He wants to win the palace games in order to remove an emperor who <3 unjust wars.
D. Apparently, per ep 17 trailer, he has absolutely no chill at ALL when it comes to his master and immediately reverts to a 14 year old boy. 😂😭 liiiiike I kept imagining them finally reuniting & I sincerely thought he'd be calm and calculated, sharing subtle glances with her and then they'd meet up later like properly trained spies. But noooo complete meltdown in public. Baby general willing to risk it all. holy fuck. Dude, she's under a SECRET IDENTITY help this child.
#a journey to love#cdrama#mom i love him#the way he immediately flipped#all pretense gone#mask off#cold menace to desperation for approval in 2 seconds flat#just give this large child a hug pleaaaaasseeee 😭😭
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(part 1)
I don't think Im ever gonna finish that lsh and cjs transmigrating into lcf fic so Ill just put my half baked au + unhinged ramblings here
-Deruth and jour died. Twins were raised by Marquis Stan (for...reasons). That was why Roksu ended up the way he is right now
-Roksu also blew up the entire Stan territory when he came of age and that earned him his infamous reputation.
-Roksu is the cold, aloof Northern Duke but he is also a pyromaniac at heart. (Alver was not amused)
-He is also ,essentially, a corporate slave like lsh and cjs which helps enliken him to them.
-Lsh got over his morality pretty quick and gets selective blindness in front of Roksu's various bouts of insanity later. Cjs had a thing for crazy northern archdukes so he was having the time of his life
-They forcefully make him sleep and eat food all three times a day. (krs really didn't wanna eat but the puppy eyes got to him)
-Eventually he gets used to the sleeping sessions so much that he cannot sleep when they leave so he asks them to stand in his room. To his annoyance, he still cannot sleep and lsh jokingly asks him if he wants to hear a lullaby.
Krs : Do I look like a baby to you?
Lsh : (internally) yes *starts singing all the lullabies he remembered*
Krs : *Out like a light in 0.1 sec*
—----
-They help him bathe and get dressed too.(wrapped him up in a bathrobe and then placed him on the bed, telling him about the itenary even if he already remembers everything as they slowly dry his hair and then help him dress up. Krs lets them bcoz their voices are surprisingly soothing and he gets to sleep longer this way)
-Cjs's eyes gleaming mischievously when krs almost purred while his head was being scratched. Krs, who had initially argued that he had no time for such useless things, froze. He later had to get a lot of head scritches and scalp massages after that.
-Drunk Roksu calling lsh hyung. Lsh nearly trips in response. (He came back home drunk from a masquerade at the royal palace and made it everyone's problem. Lsh and cjs had the time of their life though)
-Og!cale comes up one day to meet his lil brother to check if he is still alive or not, only to find him cuddling with his butler and aide (what the fuck, Roksu????!!)
-He ends up in a staring contest with the two hounds who were clinging to his precious little brother, annoyed that someone dared to disturb their private time. (Cale's hand twitch and move towards his sword when cjs smirked proactively at him as if he was taunting him)
- Cale looked gobsmacked when he saw Roksu's ears flushing when lsh and cjs were squabbling over who gets to feed Roksu. He gets so annoyed that he shoves a spoonful of food in his brother's mouth, earning a stink eye from everyone in the room but does that stop him? No.
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Or maybe all the tea I drank
LK 122: Heaven is a Place in Versailles
(pt1)(pt2)(pt3)(pt4)(pt5)
pfffffft all the way to South Cackilacky, that's somehow worse than the Mayflower getting blown all the way to fucking Mass.
lololololololol Cackilacky would open fire.
Wow they went from Stan Your Ground to Bring This Man Around Town.
aww shit road triiiip
lol I bet Congress is absolutely sauced rn.
nice save there, Sarah, your patriot was almost showing.
...Henri that would defeat the purpose of why he went and bought himself a fucking boat.
"Live in your mansion." Henri you are simping so hard how long has it been since you've been around a Frenchman? Surely there are Quebecois that come visit Philadelphia.
I see, Henri just wants that drip.
"...Well ok then."
"everything I have" aren't you boat-poor, Laf?
Sarah's not *super* thrilled she got voluntold to be the transcriber, but she doesn't mind all that much.
Congress: "without pay???? Say no more, fam."
"People who can afford to be defrauded of their labor!"
oooh yeah. Those delegates are sauced.
the only person here to properly pronounce marquis.
Major-General jesus fucking christ they fucking *are* sauced.
Pondering the Gourd.
Moses, let a girl ponder a gourd and a selection of Purple in peace.
Not to interrupt this very important dialogue but I wonder how long it took the studio to get halfway decent at drawing cocked hats, they are a BIIIITCH, also is that a fucking machete they're using to cut that cheese wheel.
H A M T R A N S I T I O N
is a ham transition a hamsition.
Okay I am actually curious wtf is this.
Gettin a taste of that Pilly nightlife, Jober?
is Lafayette supposed to be short or did James grow a fucking inch gotdamn the great dane/beagle puppy had a growth spurt.
Okay fangirl, take it down by like one notch.
#liberty's kids#amrev#18th century#tricorn watches#tricorn on the cob watches LK and makes inane commentary#Lafayette#henri lefebvre#sarah phillips
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idc if you don't know what the mechanisms are. vote marquis de all the knives based on name alone. idc about the marquis i just can't let lyf win bc their stans are the most annoying people on the planet. they're a framing device and a cop and i'm using "they" here less in the nonbinary sense and more of the "this character is such a non-entity that we don't even know their gender/pronouns". but they got one (1) funny interaction with some of the crew members and suddenly they're a fan favorite with a million of annoying people talking about how they want to steal the gender of a character who is Such A Nonentity That They Don't Even Have One. i've gotten anon hate for pointing out that lyf isn't An Actual Character bc their stans got offended of the pinacle of writing known as their widely agreed upon headcanons that got accepted as some deep mechs lore which you can find if you dig enough as if they've even gone as far as reading the Readily Available Written Fictions On The Website (my source on mechs fans not reading the readily available canon content? no one fucking knows who narcissus is and he's Kinda a big deal in them). we can't let lyf win. did i mention they're a cop. vote marquis de all the knives and vote narcissus while you're at it.
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do you have any twilight blog recs? i’m trying to get back into it but everyone seems to have deactivated :’(
BOY DO I!!!! i've been waiting for an ask like this so long that many of the blogs i originally would have rec'd have deactivated or switched focuses. but good news there's always lovely new blogs joining the squad. here are some of my faves:
@howlonghaveyoubeenseventeen emma the light the angel a queen who chooses to bless us with her presence daily. she's an absolute sweetheart and i love her so much; i'm so lucky to call her my friend! emma reblogs a lot; mostly wolf pack focus but with fair amount of other characters. a lot of good memes. also has an impressively large twilight library and is able to answer basically any question about the saga, with references.
@panlight i'm pretty sure they're one of the OGs of the renaissance, long before it was actually a thing?? anyways an actual legend among people. we haven't talked too much, but they always post a TON. a pretty good variety of all characters, with less of a focus on the main three (eddie/bells/jake.) their responses to questions are so well thought-out and super interesting to read. they also run @keepingupwiththecullens which is truly the funniest thing on god's green earth.
@forkscult noy is another one i haven't talked to much, but they seem so cool!! another wolf-pack focus blog, but they have a pretty good variety of reblogs. a lot of really aesthetic content. they create graphics that im absolutely obsessed with, mostly focusing on a modern au. they're SO pretty and fit the characters so well, esp. with the lil descriptions!
@phil-dwyer-stan-account addison is so cool! their blog features some non-twilight posts, but they have a lot of reblogged memes and such! they made moodboards that are so so pretty. a very fun presence on the dash.
@the-most-pathetic-edge-marquis hello i love mj that is all. no but seriously they're SO sweet. they always leave lil tags when reblogging posts that are just so so kind and i love reading their thoughts. fair amount of reblogging but they ALSO have some writing and analysis that i just adore. super talented and i love seeing what they post! team jacob focus i think?
@musingsofvenus madi is so cool! another wolf pack focus (are you sensing a theme here? good.) she posts a lot of fic and it's so good! i haven't read too much of it, but i've absolutely adored what i have. (pink cheeks, two left feet anyone?) also v funny. an all around gem.
@paulxlahotee big billy black/gil birmingham focus, as we all should be. michele is so cool and funny and adds such an interesting voice to the fandom. has made some really cool and important posts on the indigenous rep aspects of twilight that i'm really thankful for. also super talented and sweet! makes the coolest beaded earrings.
@teamjacobthot dee!!! is!! a!!! gem!!! she's SO funny and has such good takes. wolf pack focus ft. plenty of clowning on the cullens as they deserve. also a brilliant fic writer; "nyctophobia" is six chapters (so far!) of *chef's kiss*.
@rosaalee i love bri with my whole heart!!! they're so funny and sweet and such a good friend - any time we've talked it's been such a positive part of my day! makes beautiful edits and brilliant af memes.
@the-golden-onion madly has no fucking business being so mf funny and yet??? everyday??? she's here??? being thee funniest mf around? no but seriously mads is so cool and her blog is such a delight to follow! also has the sweetest comments. i'm so glad to have her in my life.
#you told me#if i fucked up names/pronouns plz lemme know so i can fix it!!!#anyways love u guys thanks for postin about this stupid series for us to enjoy
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Kouri watches Love Like the Galaxy, episodes 15-16
Where were we? Right, XYY was pissing me off
Lou Yao is like ‘what’s wrong with porn?’ and we have no choice but to stan
They’re! So! Cute!
Thank you for pointing out to XYY that the more she objects to something, the more NN will want to do it
Why is LBY everywhere she goes????
Excited puppy Lou Yao wants to tell everyone they’re engaged and just stepped on a double land mine lmaooooooo
LBY, did you leave LY in a puddle somewhere
‘Only a fool like you would like her!’ says YSJ, who also likes her
‘She’s so hard to get along with!’ says YSJ, to someone who gets along with her extremely well
YSJ just taking the L over and over again is so funny
NN about to read this dude for filth
I’m dying watching these LBY, LY, and NN debate this like it’s a philosophical problem when they all know damn well it’s this dude’s life, and YSJ is just getting more and more appalled
This dude is such a tool
YSJ just dropping his head back down omg
NN would be the first person on every ‘Am I the Asshole’ post saying ‘leave his ass!’
Well this is terrible for LBY
I don’t even remember who this dude is and now this lady is trying to choke him
Legit couldn’t remember so I looked on Wikipedia and he’s listed as ‘Ling Yi / Marquis Chengyang (Villain)’ so uh hope that I wasn’t supposed to think he was a good guy
(Not that I did from the thirty seconds he’s been on screen but still)
‘She also undressed me’ asdgkhs;ldkjhldadjshlgfka WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT
Poor Lou Yao
The Emperor is so excited lmao
At this point I want NN to marry LY just to spite XYY
XYY: the dawning realization that I fucked up real bad
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weird little guys my sister and i were obsessed with as kids for no reason because of historical animated media:
lord byron (if y’all didn’t watch time warp trio you were missing out)
the marquis de lafayette (liberty kids made us lafayette stans a decade before h*milton)
rasputin (anastasia fucking rips okay)
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picard thots 3x05
wanging on about star trek under the cat
🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈
poor picard, forever alone until the last two weeks when TWO lady loves come back into his life and say 'oh yeah turns out we could have been in love but you fucked it up without realising it'. (not to ignore his current lady love who is the only one with the spine to let him NOT fuck it up without realising he is fucking it up).
(I can't believe we are STILL paying for patstew feeling emasculated in the early 90s. the male ego: not even once.)
Ensign Ro is one of those characters that TNG fans have Strong Feelings about, and I am one of those, because I love Bajorans and Cardassians as the true ds9 stan I am. I love seeing Michelle Forbes in things. I hope she was paid a lot to come reprise the character she's seemingly spent her whole career running away from. I suppose that, and the fact that this is a show named after Picard, that the focus will always be on her relationship with Picard. It was the most interesting part of what we got about her, along with our general introduction to the Bajoran faith and people, but we had 7 years of development of them and none of her, I always assumed she was killed when the marquis were slaughtered by the dominion as a favour to the cardassians. Lucky escape, though of course she got killed off. she had her story beat: time to die. (cash that cheque, never look back).
Anyway, not that Picard would have ever done anything with her, due to being Noble Space Coastguard Man who outranks her by about 40 years, but I quite pruriently like the wow wrong bad hot of that dynamic, in a dead dove way. Like as usual I wish we could spend more time in these characters' heads, because god I love people who fail at starfleet more than anything, they are my favourite characters in any show. The dysfunctional relationship between starfleet and those within it is fruit ripe for picking. Picard breaking the rules to sleep with Ro would be absolutely out of character in the most delicious way, to the point I kind of want to write it. Like that is tragedy, highest nobility and loyalty to an institution vs the desires of the human flesh. Genuinely the best. Awful dysfunctional relationship between man who projects wildly onto a younger woman and the younger woman who clings to older man in authority as symbol of the authority she is a bad fit for. Neither of them ever actually engaging with each other as people, therefore doomed to failure.
At the ~ revelation ~ that omg changelings are EVERYWHERE, when Ro says starfleet is corrupted to the highest level I went "what, AGAIN?" Its been 2 years since Romulans took over the top level of starfleet, and now its changelings. I mean, I still think the changelings have been there for twenty years, since the attempted coup in homefront/paradise lost.
I wish this series was...25% less ambitious prestige tv.
Anyway, glad that Jack said something to his mum that he's fucked and seeing things, but all this red and doors and stuff is synth-as-fuck, and honestly it makes no sense for Jack to be a synth even in this series. They can't do synth stuff without agnes and they ruined agnes by making her borg. it makes me miss narek, my problematic fave though. god, remember season 1? seems so long ago.
(IMAGINE IF SEASON 2 HAD BEEN ABOUT REINTEGRATION OF SYNTHS INTO SOCIETY AND EXBORGS AND JUST IN GENERALY NOT WHATEVER IT WAS GDI)
all these close ups of Jack's eyes is really highlighting that he is DRAMATICALLY miscast as a 23 year old, its just funny now. Man has more eye wrinkles than I do and I'm 36.
as we are introduced to more older characters the more I am changing my mind on gates mcfadden's face lift, I think its so uncanny it keeps throwing me out of her scenes because I keep analysing her face. can't do anything about it, and she does look good...if REALLY uncanny.
Worf and Raffi continue to be good, if a little boring. The timelines are converging. It was nice to see Charlie from Fringe as a Vulcan gone bad though. Been a little bit of a fringenaissance on TV this year, with anna torv in tlou and Charlie in this. more of that please. they deserve better.
I still like Shaw, but I like the bad apple captain trope best of all. Remember when we had Lorca and I got so excited about how Disco was going to be a show about actually working under one of the Bad Captains of the Week from TNG era?! Maybe I'm getting it.
(I also think that there's interesting things to unpack about Shaw and Seven's relationship that PERHAPS I might also write something about because mmmm he's a dick, she's bullheaded, what the fuck is she even doing in starfleet other than falling into the trap that so many failed fleeties have before, deconstruction of the protagonist hero trope, seven deserves better but how can she get better when she is in the military, which cares not for individuality?! Like the dichotomy of man who after trauma finds peace in conformity and playing by the rules, vs the woman who knows that conformity is seductive and ends up seduced by it again, and ends up in this job that she is ill-suited for even if she is technically good at it, because she is essentially self-harming by joining the military, the acceptable collective????
failed fleeties, my absolute fucking favourites. Right in the vein, please.)
anyway are we half way through? I think we're half way through. Wonderful.
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I guess the good thing is that you have Messi there so everyone will shut on him now even more than donaruma and marquinhos for the goles they conceded. I feel so bad for him heartbreak after heartbreak
We're not Barca. You underestimate our power. This fandom are very talented at blaming everyone. Guilty or not guilty. Hell, Neymar might be sold because this infuriatingly toxic management has decided to blame him for losing the match (not Messi, see)...when it was defensive mistakes that lost us the game. In a weird twisted way, Messi is kinda lucky for not being in the spotlight so to speak. Sure when other fandom mock us they'll start with him because they've wanted him to fail here since forever but psg fans, psg fans are more pissed at the players they've hoped would deliver for years. We never expected Messi to carry us. That's never been a thing so no one cares too much what he did during the real madrid match. Like some people care of course but majority of the fandom blame Neymar and Poch and Paredes and Gigio and Marquinhos etc. And yes, Gigio is getting more blame then Messi. People are angry we didn't play Keylor over him and are calling for his head which is fucked up and toxic and I hate what this club has turned into. So maybe I'm currently too annoyed with this fandom so I'm a bit snippy in my reply (apologies) but it's really frustrating when solo Messi stans come here and pretend we don't see the fucked up mess our club is and only here too heep blame on their guy. I like Messi, but this isn't about him and frankly your ask is rude and I'm not here for it. So what if he's been through heartbreak after heartbreak? So has the rest of the squad. This isn't about him only. It's about all of them. So fuck off with this condecending "oh but Messi will get all the blame now" like we actually believed he'd somehow work miracles with our clowns. No one ever saw him as our main guy, so no one thought he'd carry the team on his own. The blame lies with everyone and I'm tired of Messi fans pretending as if we're Barca and it's all about him.
#psg#football#football ask#ask#anon#sport#champions league#yes I'm annoyed#this is the fourth ask I've gotten in similar vains#i know you all only here because you stan messi#but fucking hell#blind tunnel vision much#i am out here defending gigio and marqui and neymar and messi#the gigio and ney getting so much more hate than messi#and then i come to my blog to see messi stans pretend it's only about him#that he's the only one sufferinf and we as fan blame him#grow up#messi isn't our main guy#we were never counting on him to win us matches by himself#longpost
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sorry if we're beating a dead horse here lol but I just want to add - I honestly feel very sorry for the "fake black" anon... the kind of ppl who subscribe to that kind of ethos can only be the kind of ppl who struggle w/ alot of self-loathing/superiority complex that comes from pigeonholing. I hope they find the healing they need so they can become someone as independent and positive as people like you
Whippy! omg you are absolutely not beating a dead horse. My heart is always happy to hear from youuuuuu.
Everything you just said: 100% agree. I’m really trying to be a more positive person and I don’t wish any ill fate on that person at all. I only hope that they get what they need and stay happy and healthy so...
Anywhoo thank you my loveeeeee! I’m always happy to see you pop up in my ask box babe! Love ya! 💖💖💖💖
#marquie answers#I'm such a huge Whippy stan yall#Please check out her fucking art#ESPECIALLY IF YOU LOVE HAWKS#thank you whippyyyyyy#Whippy
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nyctophobia
chapter 9: earthbound
read on ao3 | read on ff.net
summary: now, think of the biggest lover you know. it’s a water sign, right? after getting kicked out of prom ‘05, Leah and Sam still have the whole night ahead of them. and guess what? they’re home alone.
word count: ~6.3k
warnings: more of the same in recent chapters such as profanity, blatant flirting, romance, lots of innuendos, and sensuality (not explicit). last chapter had the first "fuck" but this chapter has the first FUCK……
thanks so much to everyone who's been consistently reading the story, especially those who leave comments. I really appreciate y'all and your kind words.
@bellasdumptruckass did the damn thing again as a beta-reader! thanks so much for always letting me vent, cry, scream, etc. you just get me <3
this chapter is about to get real cute, real touchy-feely, real romantic, real heart-fluttery. this is literally the sweetest thing I’ve written in a long ass time, maybe ever. GODDD I wish my first boyfriend wasn’t such a piece of shit lmao. but um anyways-
Real Lovers™ this one's for y'all!
hope you all enjoy the update! show some love in the comments if you're real <3
tag list (literally just copying and pasting from old posts - pls lmk if you want me to tag/untag you in future nyctophobia posts): @leahclearwaterdefensesquad @cheerynoir @big-idiot-wolf-boys @the-golden-onion @howlonghaveyoubeenseventeen @phil-dwyer-stan-account @paulxlahotee @edwardsmedow @the-most-pathetic-edge-marquis @effervescent-influenza @gezellig-writes @witchyangela @leahcee @haletwinsstan @musingsofvenus @leahclearwlwater @haemshaems @vampiresarezombies @femmealice @blackpack @bellasoutrageousflavor @tenarcansteponme @me-and-jake @plainjaniedee @renegadepack @manicpixietwilight @emotwilights @jacobyouidiotihadit @edwardsmate4ever @sugarshackpeasant
#nyctophobia#mine#fic#twilight fan fiction#twilight fanfic#twilight fic#twilight fanfiction#leah#leah clearwater#sam#sam uley#leah clearwater x sam uley#emily#emily young#this chapter eats once again#leah and sam need to end up together idk emily might just have to get killed off-#anyways enjoy 😌
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I’m just imagining Taylor and Cage heading over to Cale’s place to discuss Venion (and maybe GoD), and upon meeting Taylor has a brief moment of ‘was my brother killed by a 15 year old?’ (Not knowing anything about Cale before meeting since she sorta stays away from the public) and then ‘What the fuck did he do’ since Taylor just only knows about what Venion’s done to him specifically.
(Do Taylor and Cage get to meet Raon, if they’re refusing to let Cale be a 15 year old single mom. Cause that’s cute, but also just more rage at Venion for the shit he does)
Cale Thames Henituse - the aloof daughter of Deruth Henituse and the late countess - was someone that the general public didn’t know much of. All that was known was about her striking red hair, resemblance to her late mother and the lost of her place as the Henituse heir - instead she was given the place of the Thames heiress, a dying house with only her as it’s only living member.
From Taylor’s view - his brother had never interacted with Cale Henituse. The young lady had never left her place of residence unless it was for the Henituse estate. Plus, his brother would have never looked twice at Cale - a daughter of a count instead of a marquis.
So it was a surprise to hear from Cage that she was connected to the disappearance of Venion.
It had seemed too much - the Henituse family never had a hand in the black market like his own family did. And from what he could see, that family was more upright and noble compared to the Stan family.
Deruth Henituse never pitted his children against each other, Taylor thought bitterly as the Thames manor came into view.
—
Cage wheeled him as she vented something the God of death was whining about.
“He said that bastard had deserved it!” She said with a huff, “I know Venion probably did but that motherfucker god could have been more clear about it!”
Taylor could only awkwardly scratch his face. Cage wasn’t wrong about that - Venion was the reason why he spent the last year bound to a wheelchair after all. It was a no brainer to connect the assassins that had attacked him in his room with his jealous brother.
But for the eldest daughter of the Henituse family to be connected to his sudden disappearance - now that was something that didn’t make any sense.
“Well, that’s why we’re here Cage.” He pointed towards the door, “Can you call for them? I’d like for this to be over as soon as possible.”
Cage gave him a knowing nod - he needed to get back to the Stan territory to find a way to heal his legs. Even with the disappearance of Venion, that didn’t mean that he would be put back into the heir position.
No, rather it meant that there would be no heir until his younger siblings were of age and Taylor wouldn’t- no, he couldn’t wait that long. All it would do was create another environment for another Venion to happen and Taylor had already suffered the consequences of that.
Cage grasped the door knocker - the metal making a large banging sound that filled the quiet air.
It didn’t take long for someone to answer the door, but instead of a maid or a butler that would have normally answered the door, it was a person with long red hair and brown eyes.
Cale Henituse’s and his eyes met only once before the door had slammed right in their faces.
#cale henituse#trash of the count's family#Taylor Stan#tcf cage#deruth henituse#thames family au#writing#I’ll reblog it with the continuations#but it’s almost 2 am#this ask deserves a whole fic for it#I need to see Cale low key panicking
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give all your mutuals roles in your favourite movie/TV show/book (only pick one)
I know you said only do one….but I couldn’t…I had to do two different pieces of media because I just couldn’t decide and I know you guys don’t watch the bad batch. And like….was I not supposed to do the bad batch?
Anyways :) you guys can skip this one if you want.
Rex: Ray, 1000%. Old (lmao I’m sorry Ray, it’s a joke in the show), famous, considered the cool guy, everyone loves him, hella talented at what he does, just Ray vibes all around. (And he’s blond) @binch-i-might-be
Omega: Rose, again, 1000%. Such a little sweetie, so cute and curious, kinda scary when she wants to be, but an angel. Very much protected by her space dad and uncles. (Lmao and she’s also blonde. And, Idk if yall know this, or even if Rose does, but she is my tumblr little sister. I don’t make the rules, so she is definitely Omega) @hopeless-bisexual-queen
Wrecker: Tori. Absolutely chaotic, no chill, fucking loves everything to do with his friends, very very protective, and quite honestly really scary when he wants to be. This screams tori to me :) @torivikachu
Echo: Jamie. The level headed one, he’s the Mom of the group (literally Jamie), done with the chaos, just wants to live his life but cannot because his squadmates are a bunch of idiots. @thejamdergod
Tech: Elle. Is very informative and intelligent, but has a softer side that only people he sympathises with and his squad get to see. Can be a little abrasive sometimes, but only through protection means. Loves a bit of angst (nobody can tell me Tech wouldn’t thrive off of angst) @in-some-future-time
Hunter: hmmm. Idkkkk. I guess as one of the oldest members of our little group of friends, I don’t really see anyone as parental, or taking on the dad role the way Hunter does. Potentially maybe Sarah, as she can be quite protective of us, but the vibes don’t line up perfectly. @76historylover
Crosshair: Byrd. Okay, Byrd is nothing like Crosshair, but I didn’t want to leave either of them out, and I feel like if they met they’d actually kinda vibe lmao. @the-lord-high-admiral-themself
Cid: kit lmao. Personality alone. Very sarcastic, fucking hilarious, absolute queen. @imgaybut
Kanan: we don’t see much of Kanan in the show, but he’s just a ball of baby who you want to hug but also not because he’s going through his teenage phase and ahdhfkfkah I love Kanan. Big Lin vibes for me. @eat-th3-rich
Trace Martez: Ink. Lmao kinda pure but also not, hella chaotic and when on a mission cannot be stopped. Is very impulsive and just….decides to do things just because, is on the younger side but very mature, although emotions can sometimes get the better of them. I think this is very Ink @quillsink
Rafa Martez/Fennec Shand: these two both scream Clair to me for different reasons. Rafa is lowkey hilarious, protective of the little sister (in this case, ink) kinda lowkey vibes by oneself but also thrives off of attention and doing the right thing. Ahsoka stan. The vibes aren’t perfect but I definitely get them. And then Fennec Shand for being an intimated badass queen, like holy hell. It’s just clair, I don’t make the rules. @ms-march
Okay okay, now for something that will satisfy you guys instead of me being self indulgent. I won’t explain these, 1) to avoid the post being really long, and 2) for you guys to try and figure it out for yourselves. Nor am I going to specify exactly which piece of amrev media these come from :)
Alexander Hamilton - @quillsink
Martha Washington - @binch-i-might-be
Baron Von Steuben - @torivikachu
Marquis de Lafayette - @hopeless-bisexual-queen
John Laurens - @thejamdergod
Richard kidder Meade - @in-some-future-time
George Washington - @76historylover
John Andre - @the-lord-high-admiral-themself
Okay that’s as far as I can go for now. I’ve answered so many asks that my brain is absolute mush lmao. I’m never letting it get that filled again
#ask bea#bea’s mutuals#ink 🖋#jo/elle/alex 💫#kit 💍#tori 🦋#jamie 👑#Rose 🌹#Lin 💚#Sarah 📕#Byrd ⚡️#Clair 🌼#ray ☀️#the bad batch#echo tbb#Hunter tbb#omega tbb#wrecker tbb#tech tbb#fennec Shand#trace Martez#rafa martez#kanan jarrus#Alexander Hamilton#John Laurens#Marquis de Lafayette#George Washington#baron von steuben#Richard kidder Meade#John Andre
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There's something I'm trying to put into words,
about the discomfort of straight women who are very into slash and yaoi. It's been bothering me in a quiet way for a while, and then over the weekend it exploded, and I'm trying to pick my way through pain constructively.
There's a couple of things.
~*~
Point zero is that desire is good, actually, and so is fantasy. Keep this in mind, we'll come back to it.
~*~
The first thing is shame. People who are choosing to approach their own desire from the side, not willing to recognise their own bodies or vocalise their desire in their own voice, or think about sex in which their bodies participate. People who are too afraid to work on their own liberation, so take yours.
After all, feminist sexual writing is a whole genre and tradition. The only reason why queer men's liberation feels appealing to these women is that they have nothing at stake in it: it's fantasy, it's safe, it's nothing to do with or about them.
For actual queer men, the process of liberationary sex writing is - of course - mortifying; or there is a stage of mortification and pain one experiences in approaching it. It is not, and never will be, your safe space; that's why you're trying to transform it into one.
~*~
The second thing is privacy. I'd wake up and log on and there would be a full-flown gigglefest about sex in slash, and not being able to quite put my finger on how to say - this is making me feel bad and weird. And in retrospect, this picks up on point 1. Whose bodies are we sexualising in this space. I want to go back and start a conversation about how I prefer girl-on-top and how people who read missionary fic are gross, and hey when you read Barbie/Ken fic, do you see them mostly doing it doggy style?
Because I think that would make-it-real, for these women to feel their own bodies are at stake and being scrutinised in the conversation.
Making my morning coffee, I wonder what kinds of sexual relationships these women have, and if they know that "gay missionary" isn't this abstract concept that appears in fanfiction but a kind of sex they have all the right anatomy to experience for themselves. I suspect they would not like that, and that also the purpose of these conversations is specifically so that nobody envisages them having sex, or being sexual beings.
~*~
The third is experience.
A. thinks that it's a problem that teenagers watch gay porn. (A. wrote her dissertation on gay porn.) A has never had her rights removed on the basis that the world must be made "safe for children".
B thinks there's too much gross stuff in fanfic and it should be banned. B has never experienced fanfic archives removing LGBT material under the aegis of child-protection and removing what is "gross". B has never experienced a reasonable-sounding expansion of anti-kink laws being used in the vaccum where anti-gay laws once stood, the way they disproportionately target queer porn, or are used to harass sex workers, or arrest queer people.
C thinks that anyone who has a gross fantasy, is a hair-trigger away from actually hurting somebody. C is cisgender, and will never be arrested in a bathroom or have her body regarded as inherently a gross sexual fetish. C does not date women, and has never come to learn that a fist may be more easy to take than a kiss, when you are made to feel disgusting for desiring love. C is also asexual - the shame associated with having a sexual expression of any kind is not on her radar. C does not experience gender dysphoria, and had to wrestle with the downright odd things you brain does to manage a libido and an incoherent body all at once. C has never dated someone who survived the peak of AIDS, and has formed intimate connections between blood and sex and death, forged by decades of homophobic media and law. C. cannot tolerate the concept of erotic horror because she has never been made to experience her own body and desires as horrifying.
All these women spend all their free time making stories about imaginary gay and crossdressing men, talking about drag race, and sylvester.
This is not dissonant to them. As we have said, these women see queer man culture as a a place of safety - an escape from patriarchy and their own discomfort. They are unable to comprehend queer expression as a thing that is not safe.
They are very certain that they can tell the difference between a sexual expression that is gross and nongross; and hurting the gross is therefore OK, because punishing perverts will never be co-opted in their soft-focus world of tender coffeshop AUs and gentle longing and having the right kind of gay sex that is photogenic for women to consume.
~*~
A corollary: these things are not for you. What if we defined queer media - one of many possible definitions - as a thing that excludes. Their defining quality is a conversation between queer artist and queer listener, drawn from the conversations the artist had with their friends and lovers, or conversations with the world which anyone within the wall will find familiar.
I am suddenly, humbling-ly and viscerally aware of where the *don’t like white people who like ballroom culture* people are coming from
~*~
The fourth thing is that broader conversation about women with privilege (whiteness, class, straightness), being unable to consider that their behaviour could ever be dangerous or destructive.
Their own narrative of sexual victimhood and shame is central in their own hearts, and they are incapable of adopting an intersectional perspective which adds nuance to their experiences.
~*~
And the fifth is how much they hate you when you try and bring actual queer politics into their fragile world.
Simultaneously asking, on the one hand - could we make this space safe for work again, so it feels a little less like it does now? and being howled at, as if that's an outrageous restriction on their right to talk about pornography.
And on the other, if we are to be a porn conversation place, can we try and rethink the judgemental "anyone who likes weird sex is a threat" attitudes that come up over, and over, and over again.
Needless to say, the needle for "this man is a sexual predator" fired in under 30 seconds and, shortly after demanding I leave the community I established, nobody has spoken to me since.
~*~
There's a particular soreness, I think, of being around people who want to casually chat about drag and feel like Born This Way is theirs and want to PM you about their dissertation on gay porn studios of the 1970s and stan the Marquis de Sade
but cannot take the reality of being around queer people or their lives.
An ugliness, a grossness, a grossness that compounds the passively "being treated like a sexual object" into an active bar on having sexual subjectivity. A be seen but not heard of the bedroom: be seen, a Bowie-chiselled Velour-glamoured Cowley-sparkling Velvet Goldmine vision;
but not heard, as in, don't ever cross that line into talking about real sex in our fantasies (even when our fantasies are your real sex), and don't ever make us consider that our words have weight.
I'm spending time in a little world with women who like Interview with a Vampire, the Company of Wolves, David Lynch and the Marquis de fucking Sade, and who are so fragile around their own fears of desire that they cannot tolerate someone saying - it's fine to be into stuff, and not be ashamed.
This odd middle space, where on the one hand I am comfortable in spaces which are sexually silent - where the horror and challenge of my body and life never come up; and on the other, I am comfortable in spaces which are radically sexually open, in which no-one need feel afraid or judged.
These women, on the other hand, want something else: this desire to talk about sex billowing out of them, irrepressably, but also to use that freedom to box other sexualities down tight - to judge, to shame, to define themselves coyly by describing others as disgusting, to feel that urge spilling into view only to publically run away from it and demand others do the same.
Erotica, without wanking. Desiring men, without women. Thinking about the sex lives of your toy dolls, but not being into that weird stuff. Fantasies, with no bodies. Male sexuality, with no actual men in it.
~*~
I am the last of three queer people who has left that community; and still, I imagine, the "define our own sexuality in coded ways by judging things we are not as gross, and creating in the gaps around our own bodies and desires a world of gay men who are like I wish to be" conversations are going on; but unobserved by any actual queers who might break the fantasy.
And reader, I liked these people. I'm heartbroken.
#longreads#responses welcome but reblog with care#I have this lovely little note I was sent last week from one of them saying how much they appreciated the work I'd put in to making such a n#nice community#The bedroom politics tag#the feminism tag
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Finished Trinkets & I have...feelings
So it all kind of started out like,
Netflix: “WE RECOMMEND THIS SHOW TO YOU! YOU SHOULD WATCH IT! IT’S AWESOME. WE CANCELLED IT AFTER TWO SEASONS!”
Me: “Don’t tell me what to do...” *watches trailer* “Aight, maaaaybe one episode to see what this is about.”
Moe: *walks on screen, says absolutely nothing*
Me: “That one there. That’s my favorite...”
And the rest is history. Then I slowly started to love all the girls, while subsequently thinking that the men were absolute trash.
After having binged the entire series in 2 days, this is what I took away from it (spoilers below cut):
-I wanted Brady to choke and die.
-Noah Simos was precious and pure and I will fight anyone who says otherwise.
-Holy shit, is that Kirsten Dunst? I think it’s hilariously meta that they brought on the lead from “Bring it On”, an entire movie whose premise was about stealing things from another culture, and made her the lead in Shoplifters Anonymous. (edited: I’m a dumbass, see notes)
-Moe’s “DIE” note made me laugh a lot for absolutely no reason.
-Tabitha’s parents were kind of assholes. I liked her mom a lot more than her dad. I think that was the whole point...that they were so self-absorbed that they couldn’t see that their daughter was in trouble. But still.
-Elodie’s father and Stepmother were hella understanding...a lot more understanding than Elodie ever gave them credit for (until the end).
-Moe honestly had the best mom. I loved her so much. And her brother was also a gem. Other than her dad, her family was pretty fucking rad.
-Elodie, Tabitha, and Moe ditching their school trip to go steal from a sex shop was hands down one of the funniest things I have ever seen.
-After meeting Elodie’s mother, I grieved for her.
-Sabine is a whole ass predator and I got really wigged out watching her scenes with Elodie because Elodie looked like she was about 16 and Sabine looked 30.
-I liked Luca to start, but then he ended up being garbage. I would have liked it better had he remained a platonic SA friend, but I’m glad they didn’t normalize the fact that he, too, was a predator.
-Watching Tabitha giving that homeless man a banana made me cry.
-Watching Elodie listen to the voicemails from her mother made me cry (hit too close to home for me).
-Watching Moe deal with her dad disappointing her made me cry.
-Basically I cried like a bitch. A lot.
-Moe punching Brady was life altering. It was more satisfying than sex.
-I’ll never get over hearing Moe call Elodie’s dad a “Zaddy”.
-How did Sabine not get arrested for kidnapping? She drove off in a van with a minor. Like...the fuck?
-”You don’t fuck with me. And you don’t fuck with my girls...” RIDE OR FUCKING DIE, TABS! I wanted her to shank Brady’s bitch-ass.
-Chase was kind of a precious scone.
-Watching Chase and Moe do “The robot” at the robot competition...I could feel the awkward.
-Jillian was like a baby gay Tara Maclay (from Buffy). She was adorable and I loved her and Elodie together.
-Elodie’s gay panic was precious, but also I felt for her.
-Kayla was annoying AF, but I felt for her.
-Rachelle kept getting funnier as the series went on. Getting rid of her dads at the party screaming they were out of hummus was peak comedy.
-AJ and Marquis were goals. When they were screwing with Tabitha about the lens, I almost died. Marquis being like, “You can speak to my manager...” and AJ popping in like, “Hi, I’m his manager!”
-Watching Elodie return all the items she stole was the most unbelievable bit in the entire series. How she not gonna get arrested? One of those Karens absolutely would-a called the cops on her...or...oh, wait...never mind. That only would have been had it been Tabitha returning the items.
-Tabitha’s “I’m not afraid of you anymore...” ON MY FEET CHEERING
-The “fuck you” to Brady at the end, while simultaneously coming clean about everything was FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. Watching the school turn on him, especially his “bro”. I think even the teacher was like, “screw it, those girls are queens.”
-Brady: “YoUR GiRLfRiEND DiD ThiS...”
Noah: “No, YOU did this.”
FUCK YES, NOAH! PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE! WE STAN A KING!!!
-The ending had me sobbing like a baby, because I still haven’t done anything with my mom’s ashes.
-Seeing the bits of flash-forwards with where the girls ended up. *chef’s kiss*
-”We belong together.”
-The entire soundtrack slaps.
-Still want Brady to choke and die.
Netflix, you a bitch for making me fall in love with a show you fucking cancelled after 2 seasons. I hope Hulu eats you with a side of fava beans.
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