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It's kinda funny that the Astral Ward puts so much effort into keeping the mists out of Tyria, only for the mad king to just waltz into Tyria every year to be a public nuisance with seemingly no pushback.

Your wish is my command. You see, if you clip into Isgarren's Hidden Library, you will find this copy of Eparch's Journal, with the whole encounter laid bare, though Eparch's proficiency with Tyrian language was underdeveloped at the time. Here be a screenshot:

every kryptis has (1) mortal weakness

Eparch haz.bin hotel demon design

I overheard the dialogue the other day abt Nourys being a pet and that kinda blew my mind... so nonsensical Eparch with a (baby) Nourys, I guess????

also because i can not stop thinking about this. how is Eparch's design also so boring. this game gave us Deimos and Cerus and Nourys and then was like "and now the dreaded midnight king" and it's just Jason from accounting in comparison.

Eparch

inspired by the post that went "eparch is tyria's number 1 wife guy" i can't find it again, but I think about it all the time .

Before the next SotO update drops, we wanted to take a moment to share our most unhinged theory yet:

I remember the first time doing Skywatch meta and the part where Lyhr starts talking about "him" and describing "his" face in an intimate way and then just going "does Lyhr gay????" (seems confirmed by Waylit Lantern to me!) then we meet Dagda and learn about her close relationship to Waiting Sorrow and then the more we learn about the Astral Ward....

Well, I already clocked the Astral Ward as presented in Skywatch as a reference to an audience forced to reckon with the reality of what they treated like fiction

When you put these together, the Astral Ward and the Wizards are really just analogous to "community put together by queers with little else place to go writing their gay little RPF fanfics"

The Astral Ward is tumblr and the Wizard's Court is AO3—

Idea about Peitha:

Okay assume we roll with the idea that Eparch is the three of thems dad. Okay now what if- what if Peitha takes after her dad and Deimos and Cerus take after their mom. What if Eparch is actually like...A kinda of "normal" sized guy and more humanoid looking like Peitha [but you know still probs big and stuff]. But then the Kryptis lady he got with was a beef cake an absolute monster truck of a woman who could bench-press him, no sweat. Forget that we can all easily assume the real reason behind the designing differences and instead come humor the idea with me that Eparch is actually shorter and less beefy then his sons and he got with a gigachad kryptis woman who looked similar to Cerus and Deimos

thinking about soto again. does anyone else feel like eparch feels a lot less threatening than, like, even cerus did in early soto? we hear a lot about how he’s this great tyrannical leader who eats his subjects and ooh ahh so scary!!! but we never really see that. we see the aftermath of what he’s done, which yeah sure, he’s a bad guy and i feel sympathy for the kryptis under his reign, but it’s not enough for me to feel like he’s a threat. i understand anet wanted to keep his design and grand reveal towards the end of the storyline but i feel like he could’ve been a much more effective villain than what he currently is if they did less of telling us how bad he is .. and more of properly showing it. we also don’t ever get to interact with him personally until then. even something minor like him talking to the commander akin to what peitha did would be nice. in some of the first story scenes with cerus, it establishes how strong he is in comparison to the commander and the way he can just so easily overpower us. eparch doesn’t do that. he suspends us in the air and knocks us back for like three seconds and then leaves? ok man

i think it would’ve been so much nicer if during the big confrontation scene with peitha, labris & eparch if eparch … ate labris. in front of us. and left. it’d show he really doesn’t care about his family/subjects and it would also just rock??? and make labris’ death much more meaningful than it was. and his design. it’s okay he’s cool looking and all but he looks so boring in comparison to cerus & deimos. he looks like he’s about to keel over and die whereas the big demon bros were intimidating looking. EPARCH LOOKS LIKE AN OLD MAN! maybe that’s the vibe they’re going for but id rather him be some big horrifying beast of a demon than what we got

maybe i’m alone in this but idk. i’ve enjoyed soto so far but there’s certainly issues

Through the irrefutable scientific process of Reading Too Much GW2 Tumblr, I have deduced that Peitha is the child of Eparch and Isgarren. I am positive this is canon now.

If you become afraid of me I know there is no salvation for me

With the introduction of general Nephus I hope we get to see some crazy kryptis military tactics abusing their unique physiology.

I'm talking using their ability to possess people to pack an entire army into one person for stealth and mobility, using their planar travel powers to ignore the concepts of distance and travel time or luring enemy kryptis away using the powerful emotions of a small number.

Show me why he's a legendary general anet!

Since Heitor is Peitha and her brothers' cousin, and Eparch and Labris are their uncle and aunt... I kind of like the thought of Heitor being Eparch and Labris' child. It's just not acknowledged because they don't care about anyone but each other.