#don't mind me just trying to explore leo's avoidance | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

janetbrown711 · 1 month

Text

Youth

Mikey is tired of the sewers. They're too dreary, too quiet, too... nothing. Not since two days ago, when a witness became a sacrifice and changed the course of everyone's lives forever.

Canon divergence fic based around s4e25 Requiem to explore grief and trauma in a different way <3

Part 1 Part 2

Ao3 Link

Lightning illuminated the night sky as Mikey lifted the manhole cover. On an average night, it would’ve frightened Mikey enough to decide this was a bad idea, and he’d walk back to the lair in shame, but not tonight. No, Mikey got out, barely making sure the manhole cover was back in place, before proceeding onto a rusty, old fire escape.

He welcomed the sound of thunder as it boomed and crashed. He welcomed the roaring, as it sounded more like home than home was these past two days. It was quiet, and the sewers weren’t meant to be quiet– it was unnatural, and Mikey just had to get out.

He welcomed the rain too, the water and earthy smell managing to break through the all consuming numbness that was threatening to consume him. He didn’t mind if it made the ladders and fire escapes more slippery, it was worth it to reach his destination– the roof of the Wolf Hotel.

A weight crashed down on Mikey, making his knees nearly buckle, but he managed to carry himself to the edge where he sat and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

It had been two days. Two days since Master Splinter suggested they split up. Two days since everything seemed like it might actually be okay again. Two days since Shredder– that stupid, ugly abomination– crawled his way back up and–

“Mikey.”

Leo.

Mikey wasn't surprised he was followed, even if Leo hadn’t left his room at all the past two days.

“Mikey, what are you–... what do you think being up here will do,”

Mikey rolled his eyes while still keeping them shut tight. He liked feeling the rain against his skin, even when he was a kid. Why, he and Raph would even–

“Mikey.”

“Leave me alone, Leo.”

“You know I'm not going to do that.”

Mikey rolled his eyes. “You didn’t have a problem locking yourself in your room.”

“Mikey, that– that's not fair, you know it isn't. I need time to… process too.”

“Then let me process and go away.”

“Mikey, we’re leaving for the farmhouse in an hour, we have to–”

“I don't have to do anything, so just leave,” Mikey snapped.

“Alone on a rooftop? No– not just a rooftop– the rooftop where– where Shredder–” Leo choked on his words, before shaking his head. “Fat chance, Mikey. We're leaving.” The older turtle grabbed Mikey's arm, but Mikey snagged it away.

“M'not going anywhere. Leave. Me. Alone.” Mikey sent a glare his brother's way.

“Mikey, cut it out, I'm not messing around,” Leo scowled and grabbed his arm again, successfully dragging him away from the edge before Mikey could break the grip again.

“Or what? Haven't I been punished enough?” Mikey laughed pathetically.

“Haven't you?! What about me?! What about Donnie?!” Leo cried, gesturing furiously. “Mikey, I am not going to lose another–”

Mikey took a step back. “I'm– I’m not doing that– I’m just–”

“‘You're just’ what, Mikey?” Leo scowled.

Mikey grit his teeth. “Just leave, Leo. Before I make you.”

Leo took a hesitant step forward. “Mikey–”

“I said leave!” Mikey shouted, jumping up and quickly going in for an attack with his nunchucks, which his older brother narrowly avoided. Leo barely had time to take his katanas out before Mikey went in again, and he grunted in frustration.

“Mikey, I don’t want to fight you!” he warned, thunder cracking in the background.

“Then leave me alone! I didn’t ask you to be here!” Mikey’s voice cracked, a sign of weakness he made sure to correct by striking back harder. He managed to get Leo in the side, and when he slid around the back he managed to buckle Leo’s good knee. Leo grunted, trying to get up hastily, but Mikey managed to wrap a nunchuck around one of Leo’s katanas, disarming him before Mikey kicked the blades away.

Leo shot a look of disapproval before trying to juke Mikey out, but Mikey expected that. He kicked Leo in the ankle, getting him a sharp look of frustration, which was just the distraction Mikey needed to disarm his oldest brother entirely.

“Mikey, stop! What are you even doing right now?!” Leo pleaded.

“I’m getting you to leave me alone!” Mikey punched an AC unit.

“Mikey… please… just come home.” His oldest brother was begging now, fully bowing to the ground.

“I don’t care,” Mikey’s voice turned to ice. “I’m not going to the farmhouse, or to that stupid funeral.”

Leo sat up. “Mikey– Mikey, c’mon–”

“Just shut up and go already.” Mikey was getting impatient.

“This isn’t what he would’ve wanted, Mikey, and you know that.” Leo stood.

“What do you know about what he would have wanted?! It’s your fault he’s even gone in the first place! You agreed to split us up!” Mikey tackled his brother and raised his fist, ready to punch Leo right in his stupid, stupid face before someone from behind grabbed his wrist and held it tight.

“Michelangelo.”

Lightning illuminated the night sky, showing Mikey the hand on his wrist was his Papa’s, and his anger dissipated in a blink.

“Papa– Papa, I-I– I don’t– I-I– I’m sorry.” Mikey’s legs shook as tears welled up fast, giving a warm contrast to the bitter rain.

Splinter closed his eyes and sighed, pulling Mikey off of Leo before wrapping him in a tight, tight embrace. “It’s okay, my son. Everything is alright.”

Mikey shook his head. “I-I can’t– I-I can’t do this without ‘im– I miss ‘im so much, Papa, I–”

“I know, akarui, I know.” Splinter hugged him tighter.

“I miss Raph– I miss ‘im so, so, so much,” Mikey buried his face in his father’s shoulder and wept.

“I know… I’m sorry, I know…” Splinter sighed and rubbed his back.

Mikey cried more.

.o0o.

“Raaaaaaaaph! Tell Chompy he needs to stop snacking on Ice Cream Kitty's sprinkles!” Mikey shouted to the pit from the kitchen. With a huff, he tried to pull the baby turtle-god away, but was met with a deceptively fierce bite.

“What? Ice Cream Kitty can't share?” Raph snarked from the other room.

Mikey rolled his eyes. “I don't even think sprinkles are healthy for little planet sized turtles, so unless you wanna make the little guy sick–”

“Quit your yapping, you big baby,” Raph sighed loudly as Mikey finally heard him get up from the couch, and he entered the kitchen with a huff. “He didn't even eat that much, he's fine.”

“Yeah! But at this rate we'll be out before April or Casey can get us more.” Mikey crossed his arms.

Raph rolled his eyes and picked up the baby turtle. “Whatever, I’ll get more when I’m out on patrolnext then.”

“Psh, you better,” Mikey huffed, putting the box away when his t-phone suddenly buzzed. He opened his phone to find a text from Mondo Gecko explaining he and the mutanimals were “throwing a total rager bro” and that “he and his bro bros and even his rat dad were totes invited”.

Mikey immediately sent a quick thumbs up + party emoji + turtle emoji + rat emoji + winky face + crazy face. “You down to hang with the mutanimals today? Mondo says they’re throwing a party.”

“What kind?” Raph asked, giving Chompy a good scratch on his chin.

“I dunno, but Mondo says everyone’ll be there, which means you and Slash can totally trash the place.” Mikey grinned.

“Sweet! It’ll be good to spar with someone with actual talent again.” Raph cracked his knuckles.

“Hey!” Mikey complained, but Raph happily ignored him.

“C’mon, let’s get Donnie, I don’t wanna be late.” He ran out of the kitchen to the lab, and Mikey followed despite his elder brother’s “relentlessly cruel” behavior.

“Yo, Donnie! Party at the mutanimals! It’ll be a total rager!” Raph shouted as he opened the door to his mostly-unamused brother.

Donnie massaged his forehead. “You know, as much as I love watching you and Slash destroy public property, I think–”

“Aww, c’mon, Don! It’ll be fun! Besides, you and Dr. Rockwell can totally talk nerd stuff!” Mikey caught up with Raph.

“Yeah, besides, it’s at their hideout, so it’s technically private property.” Raph smirked.

Donnie tapped his chin, looking all around the lab for a moment before shrugging. “Ah, what the hell? I could use a day off.”

“That’s more like it!” Mikey cheered. “C’mon! Let’s go get Leo and Master Splinter!”

“Master Splinter? Really?” Donnie questioned as he stood and stretched.

Raph shrugged. “Maybe they wanna talk to him about something important– or force him to take a day off.”

“Fair enough, let’s go,” Donnie laughed and the three of them ran to the dojo, where Leo and Splinter were talking.

“Hey, Leo! Wanna go visit Karai and them? Party at the mutanimal’s crib, yo!” Mikey gave a big thumbs up.

“And you can come too, Sensei!” Raph did the same, making Mikey laugh a little.

Their father stroked his beard for a moment before nodding. “Perhaps I do need to get out of the sewers for a time.”

“Alright!” Mikey cheered alongside Raph and Donnie, and they went to leave– though Leo stayed frozen for some reason.

Raph beat Mikey to the punch, turning back and asking, “C’mon, Leo, what’s the hold up?”

“Nothing! Nothing, I– let’s go have some fun.” Leo gave a weak smile and joined his brothers as they headed to the Shellraiser.

Leo smiled and started talking to Donnie and Raph like everything was fine, but Mikey didn’t buy it, frowning ever so slightly.

“Is Leo okay, Master Splinter?” Mikey ventured to ask.

“Do not worry, Michelangelo. It is nothing that will not be fixed with time.” His father smiled down at him softly as he placed a hand on his shell. Mikey still didn’t love the answer, of course, but he knew pushing wouldn’t get him anywhere– not to mention it would be a total mood killer. They were going to have fun– even Master Splinter! This was probably going to be one of their best nights ever in the history of forever!

… Or not.

As a ninja, Splinter often tried to prepare Mikey and his brothers to “expect the unexpected”, which Mikey was usually actually pretty good at! But certainly not this time, as he stood dumbfounded in front of the flaming mutanimal hideout with a very, very bad feeling in his stomach.

Immediately, Leo started calling out orders for rescues Mikey could barely hear before Leo and Raph worked together to remove a piece of concrete from the doorway and they all stormed in.

“Hurry, Leo!” Raph’s voice cracked with concern as he ran deep within the fires, searching for anyone he could find.

Mikey froze, not knowing what to do or who to look for, before realizing Leatherhead would be in big trouble– but he saw April and Casey helping him and Mondo out.

“Rockwell! Dr. Rockwell!” He heard Donnie shout before coughing from all the smoke.

The monkey man didn’t reply, causing Donnie to rush in further and almost right into a collapsing wall if Mikey hadn’t pulled him back in time.

“Careful, Don! We can’t get ourselves killed too!” Mikey barely resisted the urge to shake him.

“Right– right, besides, Maybe Rockwell’s already outside, he– Slash!” Donnie noticed the large snapping turtle struggling to stand and ran to his aid. Mikey and Raph both joined him in helping Slash up, making it out just before Master Splinter and Leo did with Karai, who did not look good.

Her face was pale and had a big slash on her right cheek bone that looked like a mix of a cut and scrape. Her arm also looked nasty– probably broken or dislocated or something– but either way, not a good sight. It also didn’t help that she was totally knocked out from all the smoke, though thankfully Leo seemed to fix it before it got too long.

“Karai!” Shinigami appeared from behind Slash and Leatherhead and ran to her girlfriend’s side, examining her up and down, before crying happily and smiling at Leo. “You saved her! Thank you… but– but Shredder– he doesn’t care about her anymore, he wants all of us dead, that bastard…”

Mikey’s shoulders tensed as he looked at Donnie, but he was too busy trying to do some mental math. He tried looking at his Papa, but he was obviously focused on Karai, so Mikey took a long shot and grabbed Raph’s arm for comfort. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to mind, and even patted his hand.

“The ambulances are coming; can you wait with her, Shinigami?” Splinter asked the young witch, who nodded and held Karai a little tighter. The rat nodded in approval, before beginning to sniff out Shredder’s goons, though he stopped after a moment.

“I see two clear trails leading off in opposite directions. Raphael, April, Casey, and Slash will come with me. Leonardo, you will lead Donatello, Michelangelo, and Leatherhead in the other direction, and take the Shellraiser. The rest of us will travel on foot,” Splinter commanded, and that bad feeling in Mikey’s chest only grew. He felt tempted to linger, but Leatherhead and Donnie were already on the move, so Mikey did as he was told.

Inside the Shellraiser, Mikey sat next to Leatherhead and immediately started trying to treat some of the big guy’s burns, especially on his arms. He barely even managed to find a cold compress before the engine of the Shellraiser revved up, and Donnie and Leo started talking loudly about a plan to find Bebop and Rocksteady.

“Your brothers are angry,” Leatherhead observed as Mikey pressed the first compress against the alligator’s right forearm.

“Well, yeah! They burned down your house! That’s a pretty huge deal, man,” Mikey laughed in confusion.

Leatherhead just sighed, taking a deep breath before looking at Mikey very seriously. “Something feels off about this whole thing, I just know it..”

“What… do you mean?” Mikey asked quietly so his brothers wouldn’t hear as the car started moving.

His beastly best friend shook his head. “I am unsure… but what I do know is I have a very bad feeling about this.”

“Well, at least that makes two of us, hm?” Mikey tried to flash a smile, but it faltered in microseconds.

Leatherhead smiled pitifully at him before placing a weak hand on his shoulder. “We’ll figure this out, Michelangelo.”

“Yeah, I know.” Mikey tried to be optimistic too, right before Donnie swerved the Shellraiser hard, and Mikey would’ve slammed into the wall if it weren’t for the alligator catching him.

“Sorry, Mikey!” Leo called back without even turning his head, eyes laser focused on whatever he saw on those cameras.

“S’all good, bro!” Mikey called back, but of course Leo didn’t acknowledge it. He sighed once more as Leatherhead set him back on the ground. “I hope Papa and Raph and them are okay…”

“They will be alright, Michelangelo. Your sensei is a ninja of unmatched talent, and your brother an equally fierce warrior. Let’s focus on our fight ahead, no?” The alligator patted Mikey’s back with a massive hand.

“Yeah, I can do that,” Mikey agreed just as the car swerved again.

The car would end up swerving two more times before Leo pulled up to Coney Island. They got out with haste, Leatherhead only getting a quick stretch in before going into super-focus-ninja mode. The group walked in eerie silence before arriving at the carousel, which suddenly rang to life.

“Turtles~! Come out and playyay~” Bebop’s voice rang in the cold night air. “Remember when I said that? Because it’s Throwback Thursday fools!”

“Da! We be throwing you all the way back to last Thursday!” Rocksteady joined in.

Bebop sighed like an annoyed housewife. “Shut up, Rock. I’m trying to intimidate them!”

Mikey looked at Donnie to try and exchange a laugh, but didn’t have time before the warthog shouted, “You’re going down, turtle fools!” and a barrage of rockets were launched from the carousel horses’ mouths. Mikey thought of a really funny joke about gift horses, but he chose to instead call it a ‘missile-go-round’, which annoyed his brothers just as well.

Keep it light, Mikey. Everything’ll be fine.

Mikey dodged another rocket, though his tuck wasn’t as clean as it should’ve been and he bumped his head. Frustration was quick to arrive, especially when he realized Leatherhead needed help with Rocksteady! But when Mikey finally got on his feet, Bebop and Fishface and Rahzar were all there to give him a good shove to the ground.

“This is your swan song, tartarugas. Tonight, you all fall.” The snakehead grinned and for a second, Mikey saw it.

Murder.

And not just in Fishface– but in Rahzar, and Bebop, and Rocksteady too.

Every single one of them had murder in their eyes.

Something bad was going to happen tonight.

The brothers let out something like a war cry before the fairgrounds turned to chaos– rockets and lasers and weapons flying everywhere. Unfortunately for Mikey, he was left with Bebop of all mutants. Granted, he’d usually be fine, but tonight he was just being extra annoying, and Mikey just didn’t have the patience. He kept trying to look for an out or if Leatherhead or his bros needed some support, but every time he did he'd almost get shot by one of his stupid lasers.

“Man, are you seriously still not taking me seriously?” Bebop complained, sending another stupid hip laser that Mikey ducked.

“Doesn’t help, your weapon is activated in the weirdest way possible,” Mikey huffed before attempting an upside down spinning kick that failed to strike.

The pig snorted. “Keep talking, turtle. It’s your funeral.”

The words hit Mikey like a brick wall, barely giving him enough time to dodge the stupid swine’s attack, though he mostly managed to recover without too many burns (which meant another dozen fun lectures from Donnie later, wahoo).

His frustration finally hit overdrive, allowing Mikey wailing every single move he had onto Bebop, which thankfully seemed to actually be more than he was expecting. The idiot still managed to dodge most of his hits, but the ability to scare him gave Mikey just a bit more satisfaction than he knew Splinter would like.

Being close enough to actually land hits obviously had downsides of its own though, but Mikey would take a few more burns if it meant this stupid fight would be over with so they could all just go home and be fine already.

Unfortunately, Bebop seemed able to adapt to Mikey’s quicker pace, swiftly moving in and out of the way while humming those same stupid songs, like how Mikey would when he fought Raph.

Raph– Mikey ached with worry for him and everyone else in his family– like Master Splinter, and Donnie and–

“Leo!” Mikey called out, finding his oldest brother pinned to the ground by Rahzar, whose jaws were inches away from making Mikey’s worst nightmare a reality.

Thankfully, Leatherhead heard his cry and abandoned Rocksteady to tackle the wild canine, dragging him deep, deep underwater.

Mikey’s eyes went wide as he ran to the pier. He searched desperately for his friend before calling his name as moments passed– too many moments– Was he okay? No, no he has to be. He’s Leatherhead, he survived the Kraang. It’s fine, Mikey, everything’s fine, it’s all a-okay.

When his friend finally emerged, it was as if a building were lifted off Mikey’s shoulders. He quickly helped Leatherhead back onto the pier, though as he looked back, he was surprised to find every other one of Shredder’s goons had left.

“Guys, we did it! We beat ‘em!” he cheered with a smile, ignoring the bad feeling in his stomach.

It seemed Leo was having those feelings too though, his eyes focused on the fleeing Bebop and Rocksteady before–

“Oh, no– we didn’t beat them, this was all a distraction to split us all up!” Leo realized, and the building from before came right crashing down on Mikey again, just as Donnie’s phone started to ring.

“Donnie! We need back-up! Raph is hurt– Super Shredder is too strong! Master Splinter is trying, but we need your help!” April urged, her voice clearly pained.

Mikey’s heart dropped at the mention of his older brother, and he felt Leatherhead’s hand on his shell in an instant. Whether it was supposed to be soothing or Mikey actively looked like he was going to pass out, he didn’t know.

“Where are you?” Donnie looked around as if he might see her.

“The Wolf Hotel rooftop! Please, we need you! Super Shredder is–” April’s voice was cut by grating static, causing Donnie to call out her name in distress.

“Donnie, there’s no time! Let’s go,” Leo ordered, successfully getting both brothers back into shape enough to run to the Shellraiser with everything they had.

They were all inside, doors slammed and engine started in what felt like seconds, and soon enough they were fully back on the road.

“I knew it was a set-up, I knew it– I knew it,” Leo kept muttering to himself, taking a sharp right turn.

“It’s fine– we should get there in time, right, Mikey?” Donnie glanced back at him, and Mikey nodded immediately.

It was true, the Wolf Hotel wasn’t far on the map, so they’d make it in time. It would all be fine! It would be great, even if Raph was hurt and April was panicking like that– jeez, was it just him or did it feel like the Triceraton invasion all over again?

It was like the Triceraton invasion all over again.

A firm and massive hand placed itself on Mikey’s shoulder, and it took a second for Mikey to realize it was Leatherhead.

“Are you alright, Michelangelo?” Leatherhead asked.

“It’s– it’s fine. We’re gonna get there in time, and it’ll be fine, it’ll be fine.” Mikey forced a smile, heart pounding in his chest. Leatherhead’s posture stooped, but Mikey managed to ignore it and stand to his station, finding the Wolf Hotel on the map. They were already headed in that direction, of course, but Mikey needed to do something– and staring at the Wolf Hotel location and making sure it didn’t move or disappear seemed as good a job as any.

He could feel Leatherhead's eyes on him, but Mikey didn't want to break his focus– he'd need it if he wanted to help save the rest of his family.

In no more than three-and-a-half minutes, the Shellraiser rounded the last corner and the Wolf Hotel was in sight.

“There's the building! I hope we're not too late,” Mikey pointed out and Leo drove even faster before parking sloppily. In fact, the eldest turtle brother didn't even turn the engine off before bursting through the door, looking up with his spyglass before a guttural cry left his throat.

Mikey rushed outside, searching desperately for what could cause such a reaction, before he saw it– the hellish mutant climbing up and aiming its claws right for Splinter's back– and all Mikey could do was scream.

He screamed as he watched the abomination get its footing, as it wound up its final punch. He screamed as Raph suddenly sprang to action, his posture stooped and weak, but determined. He screamed as he watched Raph then shove Master Splinter out of harm’s way, his Papa falling harshly to the ground.

Mikey screamed as Shredder’s mutated steel claws tore right through Raphael’s plastron.

Voices howled and cried around him as Mikey watched the mutant megalomaniac roar in frustration, tossing his brother’s limp body over the ledge like it was nothing– like Raph was nothing. Mikey raced to catch his brother, eyes following every inch of Raph’s descent with desperation

But Mikey was too far, too little, too late– and Raph landed on the asphalt, his body bouncing once with a loud crack, before laying completely still.

When Mikey finally reached Raph, he held his hand and squeezed it tight. He ignored the blood oozing out of Raph's stomach, and all the other scrapes and cuts and burns and bruises– hell, even the fact that his shell was completely broken, bits and pieces everywhere because this just– it couldn't– no! This couldn't– it didn't–

“Raph? Raph– Otōto– please.” Leo appeared on the opposite side of Mikey, kneeling and shaking Raph's shoulder desperately.

There was screaming from above– a wave of energy, a slam by a garbage truck, and a crunch of a compactor– but Mikey didn't look away, not even for a second.

Donnie searched desperately for a pulse, his fingers twitching and searching and feeling around desperately for something that could be fixed, a thing Mikey had seen in his lab time and time and time again. But like with many experiments in the past, it all came to nothing, and eventually Donnie pulled away and sobbed.

Mikey wanted to say something. Something important. Something that could make Raph's eyes stop being so glazed– that he would sit up and punch Mikey in the arm before hugging him tight, thanking him for saying just the right thing to make it all better.

“R-Raphie,” was all that came out.

Mikey bawled into Raph’s hand, before suddenly being pushed away from Raph by Leo. Mikey quickly went to fight, but stopped when he saw his brother begin reciting the healing hands ritual again, and again, and again, and again. Each failure made his voice falter more and more, and his laser focused eyes were quickly overwhelmed with tears. Still, Leo continued on and on until his voice gave out with a pitiful crack and even then his hands tried to carry on until even they too gave up.

The three of them wept a long, long time before there were footsteps next to them, and they heard their father let out a dreadful gasp. Leo and Donnie both got up and stepped aside to make room for him, but Mikey couldn't move if he tried.

He watched as Splinter slowly cradled his second oldest son, large pieces of his shell falling back to the ground. His hands were trembling, but still he raised them to wipe off Raph's dirt stained cheek before looking at his glazed, green eyes.

“Hontōni mōshiwakenai, my son. O yurushi kudasai,” he whispered. Shaking fingers closed Raph's eyes before it was all too much. Splinter embraced Raph tight before his posture collapsed, and he let out a haunting cry of pure agony.

Raph was gone.

.o0o.

Two days– how on earth could it have been two days? It felt like everything stopped once Raph’s body hit the asphalt, but no. Time marched on, despite Mikey’s pleas for the contrary.

“I-I can’t– I can’t do this without ‘im, Papa– I miss ‘im so much.” Mikey hugged his father tighter, barely even able to choke the words out.

“I know, Michelangelo, but we must… for– for Raphael’s sake.” His father was struggling too.

Mikey shook his head. “I can’t– I don’t wanna– I just– I can’t do it.”

Splinter didn’t say anything, just holding Mikey close and crying as he caressed his head over and over again. It made Mikey feel so small, like he was nothing more than a kid who wanted to stop being a burden and help his Papa.

Guilt ate at him, so Mikey forced himself to speak again. “Papa, I– I’m sorry, I-I just– I don’t– I can’t– b-because– I– he can’t just be gone, Papa– I didn’t even say goodbye.”

Splinter hugged him tighter. “I know, my son, I know. It’s–... it’s hard. Everything is so quiet now, and I just– I can’t lose another son, Michelangelo, I can’t–”

“Papa, no–! I-I–” Mikey’s eyes went wide as his father gave into sobs once more, and before he knew it, Leo joined the embrace too.

“We aren’t going anywhere, Father. I promise,” Leo spoke up, clearly trying to not let his voice break.

Mikey nodded as best he could. “I’m so sorry, Papa, I just wanted to be close to ‘im– I didn’ mean to scare you– I’m so sorry.” He buried his face deeper in his father’s chest, relieved to feel him relax a little.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you either– both of you, I’m so sorry.” One of Splinter’s arms moved to embrace Leo too. “I love you, my sons. I love you so very, very much.”

Mikey wanted to say it back– of course he did, what kind of a son would he be if he didn’t?– but his father’s words of comfort crushed him like a boulder, and he wanted nothing more than to sink deep, deep into the ground and away from his loving family’s arms.

So he said nothing, letting his family hold him tight while regret and sorrow weighed heavier and heavier on his shoulders until Leo eventually sniffled and let go.

“We should go home, Donnie’s probably waiting with the van already,” he suggested, and Splinter nodded.

“Yes, yes, we should.” Splinter let go too, taking away any bit of warmth and comfort left in Mikey as he did. In that moment, Mikey wanted nothing more than to force himself back into his father’s arms, but a certain numbness flooded his senses and he was left practically paralyzed by yearning.

His father noticed his still behavior, though, and placed a delicate hand on his shoulder. “Are you okay to go to the farmhouse now, akarui?”

Akarui. “Sunshine”. The title was hardly fitting these days, and added another stone slab atop his boulder.

Mikey nodded and tried even forcing a smile, which seemed to relax his father somewhat as his hand left Mikey’s shoulder.

“Let us go, then. I’m sure all the fresh air will do us all some good.” Splinter tried to smile too, patting both of his son’s shells and guiding them back down the fire escape. Mikey glanced at Leo, whose face was calm and serious like in training, making him feel even more unsettled and guilty.

Still, he didn’t say a word, just doing as he was told until he caught only one last glance at the Wolf Hotel– the place where his brother’s life was taken– before ducking back into the sewers.

#tmnt #tmnt 2012 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #michelangelo tmnt 2012 #raphael tmnt 2012 #leonardo tmnt 2012 #donatello tmnt 2012 #splinter tmnt 2012 #my fics #angst #grief/mourning #trauma #canon divergence #heavy angst fr fr #guys i love mikey so much especially when he's angry he's my son #and i love himmmmmmmmmm

19 notes · View notes

somewhereinneptune · 2 years

Text

All about your next friend!

Me posting a pac? No way, but heyyy! Hope everyone reading this is okay!! I'm sorry it took a long time, I had to tend to my energy and self as I was having symptoms of a burnout. I hope you enjoy this PAC, it's going to be focused on your next friend! I apologize this reading is short but I'm still trying to regain energy and connect with my intuition

If you don't know how this works :

We have three piles here (from the left is pile 1,2, and 3!) Feel free to pick the pile or pic that resonates with you or that you are called to. If you're attracted to more than one pile it means there's a message in more than one pile for you and if you don't feel drawn at all, it means there are no messages here and that's okay!

Pile 1

Your next friend's vibe/ energy :

Someone who doesn't give up easily and doesn't like giving up, failure, setbacks and blocksges. They're mature about it though because they realize failing is required and failing is what gets us to succeed but this person doesn't like it in a sense they don't like dwelling on it because they just wanna keep going. When something goes wrong, instead of judging themselves they think "what went wrong here? And how can I avoid this mistake next time? How can I do better?" . Same with worry and overthinking; just like any other person, they get in this energy but they are the type to immediately think of solutions to get out of it and not let it affect them. This person seems to be the one that loves being on the go, on the move and doesn't like to pause. They are also someone who isn't interested in exploring their inner deeper parts, in soul searching and soul finding or in the deeper sides of things, they just like to keep going and they seem to see life as an adventure.

This person looooves exploring. They love traveling and they want to visit all parts of the world and know about their culture and language and food, they love beauty and might have a fine taste for things , a good eye, and for beauty it could be many things : nature? Flowers? Make up? Fashion? Gardening? , Might like to spoil themselves and/ or finer things in life. They love to be in charge, project leader? The one who has control. Gambling also came to mind and they also might do something with their hands, some sort of craft and it could be a craft or talent that runs in the family or that they got from their ancestors or grandparents, might have their own business or shop, they work a lot , afraid to admit they need a deep connection with someone (platonic, romantic or both) for romantic, they're afraid love could take them away from their work. Aries and Sagittarius energy .

When / where you might meet them :

Leo season, scorpio season, Sagittarius season, winter time, park, reading a book (either you or them), laboratory, after a transformative event/ time/ cycle, might take a while

Pile 2

Rising straight from the ashes type. Very strong and might pride themselves for being strong, they're just so good at picking themselves up and when they're down , they don't stay down for long, they don't let themselves get beaten up by the world. Successful and they make sure they stay that way. They don't take defeat lightly, not at all ; if they mess up then it really affects them so they make sure they're always doing well and always being presentable and showing up the way they wanna show up . Might be a perfectionist or an overachiever. On the flip side, they have such a nice balance of- they're in touch with their emotions and they're emotionally mature but they know how to balance it out in a way it doesn't backfire on them. Practical, calm, collected , did i mention strong and successful? Earth and water energy

This person could be a writer, writing novels or music ; they write their pain out , they channel the pain and turn it to art, they heal through writing, they have a message to spread out to the world, very deep person. They could be some sort of a teacher , a witch or spiritual person. They want a deep intellectual connection, a connection where they talk about deep things, share philosophical ideas, talk about the world, transform and enlighten one another and expand one another's mind. A great manifestor and they have a thing for proving people wrong "you think i can't do that? Bitch I'll show you" , prove to themselves they can reach heights and make their life better and better, might like swords

When and where you might meet them :

Concert, Ted talk, lecture, after a problem is solved or something has settled, Libra season, rainy day, after an exhausting day, they stand or approach as you're somewhere lost in your thoughts, napping in a park lmao , watching you

Pile 3

Love reading books a lot, mysterious and keep to themselves, change their looks and personality a lot, healing and exploring their inner self, might be curious, deep thinker, only child and might come from a rich family, someone who's grown up not having friends and might still don't but Also someone who craves a companion and someone who understands them, not in touch with their emotions and not very optimistic, very very intelligent their mind is their strength, very intuitive

They like reading books, being by themselves, reading a book by the fireplace or having tea by the fireplace deep in thought, they love storms and thunder, they love listening to people and consoling them or giving solutions and advice , the therapist friend. Their life is very calm and don't have lots of excitingstuff , nothing much happening . They're so different from pile 1, they love to keep to themselves and not explore or try new things, they love researching especially about history or lost civilizations, unraveling secrets , they love sitting by the water .

They give me fictional character vibe 😭

When or where you might them :

Capricorn season, aquarius season, after a breakthrough (spiritual or financial) , after wrapping up a major cycle that has kept you stuck for such a long time, afraid and not believing in yourself, for some after you move/ travel or start something like a venture, after pursuing your dream. Is there something you've been trying to do that has been super difficult? Have you been stuck for such a long time? You might meet this person after you trust yourself and go for it, after feeling fulfilled, after choosing yourself or doing something for yourself, maybe cloudy weather

#somewhereinneptune #spirit #free readings #free tarot #readings #pac #tarot #energy #tarot readings #next friend #friend #friendship #platonic #cards

108 notes · View notes

wakeupfreanz · 3 years

Text

The Inner Child Speaks 🔑PAC Reading🔑

I swear I'm not really a pac kind of reader, but I will never ignore the call of the universe. Be advised that this reading might be emotional for some of you, choose a pile that resonates. Many blessings. None of the images are gender specific, truly pick whichever calls to you.

Pile 1: KnoW, 5oP, Justice, 7oC

Pile 2: PoC, 7oS, Death, KoW

Overall: AoP

Messages: Heart Chakra, "It's going to be okay", Overthinking.

"I feel like you shut me out sometimes." "I don't know if you like to hear me sometimes." This pile has a lot of strained feelings when it comes to connecting with themselves. Like you're trying to break off parts of yourself, ashamed of who you once were. There are probably some capricorn and pisces moons here. A lot of you are very quick to police and shut yourself up when it comes to expressing yourself. Like you didn't feel seen or heard so your first assumption is that nobody cares or wants to know, so you tend to just do the job yourself instead of be set up to feel hurt.

Your inner child is saying that it's okay for you to relax and chase things you like. This pile made me get really tear for you, because you tend to stomach so much and quietly carry your burdens without saying you need help. You'd collapse first without asking for help. Your inner child is telling you that we don't have to keep pushing and struggling through. We aren't climbing the mountain anymore. You're so worried that if we stop pushing forward that it's all going to fall apart, it doesn't make sense anymore. You're so scared of being betrayed that you have your defense and guard up constantly.

You might be a person of a more timid/quiet nature in truth, but you walk in the room and try to appear intimidating so nobody will mess with you. Your inner child is asking to be hear, stop trying to cut them away and detach yourself. Listen to them, understand them, hear them. They are you, they aren't a gum wrapped that's thrown away and never seen again. Your inner child is proud of who you are now and how far you've come, but it hurts them that you're trying so hard to forget that they ever existed.

Some of you in this pile might struggle with showing and receiving love and compassion. It feels like a lot of you might be the oldest in your family, you were made to be a caretaker before you knew how to take care of yourself.

Pile 1: 10oC, PoW, Moon, 5oS

Pile 2: Lovers, 7oC, 5oW, QoW

Overall: World rev

Messages: "It's going to be okay", "You hurt me", Overthinking.

There are some libra and aries placements in this pile. Your inner child is hurting when it comes to love and relationships. Almost as if you weren't given enough love or attention and it wounds you still today. Many of you may find yourselves overcompensating in all sorts of relationships because you believe that if you don't do enough they'll stop caring or loving you.

A good bunch of you in this pile when it comes to romantic relationships may find yourself trying to compensate for love you didn't receive in other relationships, especially in romantic. Partners to fill in parental roles, friends who will take care of you more than healthier platonic boundaries sometimes. Your inner child is telling you that the end of relationships isn't forever. Romantically, you can only bring yourself so much fulfillment in life. A good marriage isn't going to be the end of your life, you don't have to dedicate your entire being to someone because you feel like it could fix you. Your inner child and your past childhood tells me that you were very often confused. Some of you may have been very attached to some of your teachers in the past because they reflected or were similar to one of the caretakers in your life, or somewhat felt like they filled in the role of the one who could have been absent. Whether physically or emotionally.

Your inner child is asking you to stop fighting with them, stop fighting with others. It's hard to let go but what is yours will return to you and what must go should flow with the rest of time. Many of you in this pile may have more proclivity to emotional openness or being extroverted. You might be like the class clown or the funny friend. Your inner child is asking you to understand that there is so much more to life.

Pile 1: 10oC, WOF, KoP, 3oP

Pile 2: AoW, QoC, 8oP, 2oP

Overall: Star

Messages: Heart over Mind, Throat Chakra, Strength/Bravery

Those of you in this pile might struggle with headaches or migraines. Some of you might have a divorced family. Maybe some of you had parents of whom it felt as if you were the parent or had to handle much of the family business despite your youth.

Your inner child is asking you to speak to them. Many of you in this pile were often called "mature" for your age when you were younger. There is a lot of middle child energy. The independent one, the one that nobody had to worry about because they function very well independently. You often hold it together and walk along the fence easily through conflict. The problem is when it comes to you communicating how you feel to others, very strongly. You often feel like there truly might be no one that understands your problems or will listen long enough to get them.

You might feel as if you come off as monotone or boring, you often choose apathy as your coping mechanism because it's much easier for you not to feel much or look like you're feeling much from the outside. There are a couple of scorpio and gemini placements around here.

Your inner child is sending you much love and strength. They're saying that you won't end up like those around you and to stop worrying about it. You often might think or say to yourself "when i get married/have a family/get older, i wont be like them." Be reassured that you will not be. You are not doomed to the same fate that those around you are or might have done to themselves. Continue to work hard because you will make it. However your inner child is also telling you that you don't have to be so rigid and stick in the mud all the time. Please do not forget how to smile and enjoy yourself. Many of you might still have some bitterness and resentment for those who raised/were around you. Forgive them not just for them, but so you are open to receive that you are deserved. Blessings.

Some of you are much more like the father/dad friend rather than the mom friend. You often find strength in loyalty and taking care of those you deem worthy of it.

Pile 1: AoS, 9oP, 8oS, KnoS

Pile 2: KnoP rev, 9oP, KoS, AoW

Overall: 3oP

Messages: Identify, "It's going to be okay", Growth, Throat Chakra

"Please get to know me." Aquarius, Leo, and a few cancer placements here. Many of you in this pile might remember much of your childhood if at all, as if you've blocked it out of your memory consciously/unconsciously.

Some of you in this pile still feel like you're a kid at times, like you're not mature enough or equipped to handle anything in your life that happens. Like you're trapped on a merry go round and are forced just to go and watch what happens.

Your inner child is asking you to look back and understand who they are, who you are. You might have been so preoccupied with others that you might not have ever gotten the chance to really understand and develop your own identity. You might often find yourself spacing out and not noticing it, and generally avoid going through your emotions. So when they happen, they hit you like a freight train. Those closest to you might truly not know how to reach you because you're afraid of expressing yourself at all, even in private.

Many of you in this pile might struggle with self love and often bring yourself down. You might experience little bursts of enjoying yourself but they are generally very short lived. Your inner child is asking you to release your quietly pessimistic view on life and the world and be not afraid to explore it and try new things. Some of you in this pile are insanely intelligent but truly refuse to believe it. Some of you also may often argue with those who raised you. It's okay to not always know where to go or have a plan set out like everyone else. Stop being so hard on yourself.

Some of you also struggle with depression and may often take very long depression naps.

*TW for mentions of substance use and abuse in this pile.*

Pile 1: 3oS, Devil, PoP, 7oP

Pile 2: Fool, 10oW, AoC, 9oW

Overall: Star

Messages: Plan of Action, Shadow Side, Get Serious

I'm feeling strong leo placements for this pile. Some virgo placements too. For some of you, substance use/addiction might be in your family line. Some of you right now might use substances as a coping mechanism.

Some of you might have been or took witness to physical or emotional abuse in your youth in addition to this. Some of you here might have also been sickly as a child, constant colds, flu, fever, etc.

For many of you here, humor is also a big way for you to cope with some of the things that you experienced. You might not know how to stop joking, even when you're upset. Some of you struggle with bitterness toward the world and those around you.

Your inner child was not very talkative when I tapped into your energy. By nature you may be very introverted and quiet, some of you struggle with social anxiety and getting to know others.

Your inner child just wants to hug you and tell you that there is always a new day tomorrow. There is always a better place to go, a better place to be, better people to be around. There will be people who will teach you how to give and receive love, despite how painful it will be for you to unlearn old ideals imparted upon you. Many of you with traumas only speak of them to others who understand or have experienced similar things.

It will be hard to accept, but your inner child is asking you to reverse your self hatred and understand you are a gift to this world. There is beauty in life that will find you all around. Please be nicer to yourself. I'm sending a lot of love to this pile, you do not have to be the spokesperson or representative of everything you go through and have been through. Facing your shadow and understanding it is one step at a time, you are not broken person.

#pac reading #pick a pile #pick a card reading #kpop tarot #kpop readings #free tarot readings

107 notes · View notes

crimson-snowfall · 4 years

Text

Ikevamp HC: When they play Among Us

Mansion Edition

Napoleon

Plays as green

His character wears the chef hat

Tries to monitor the movement of other players in the admin room. Tries to peek at who it was who just vented on the nearby room but gets chased and killed

As an impostor, he would try to isolate players by triggering the reactor or oxygen sabotage and killing anyone he runs into in the hallway provided that no one else was nearby

Accomplishes his tasks as soon as possible but prefers to do them alone

Lurks near the reactors after finishing his tasks to immediately respond in case of a sabotage

Arthur

Plays as blue

As an impostor, he prefers carrying out his kills under a light sabotage and/or door sabotages

Will try to frame others but never Theo because it always backfires on him

Unbeatable when Theo is his co-impostor, as they always manage to synchronize their double kills

As a crewmate, he keeps track of everyone who performs a visual task when there is one in order to narrow down the list of who may be the impostor

As a ghost, he will join Dazai in following Isaac around

Isaac

Plays as pink

His character wears the cherry hat. He hates it because Dazai won't shut up about it being an apple, but he doesn't bother removing it

Hates being followed, gets followed all the time

But when it comes to doing tasks, he prefers doing them in the company of the people he doesn't find suspicious

Doesn't really hate getting killed and being a ghost if it meant he can do his remaining tasks more efficiently and without being followed by Dazai

Gets spooked when the lights get sabotaged. Will hurry to the emergency button and accuse anyone who tries to approach him

As an impostor, he would only ever kill near a vent. He would then proceed to spend the entire time hidden away in the vent until someone discovers the body or an emergency meeting is called

Vincent

Plays as yellow

His character wears the party hat

Always finds a dead body, reports it but oftentimes he has no idea who did it

Will never accuse anyone without a basis and would sometimes even defend William

Accidentally self-reports, nobody suspects him

Sometimes he forgets or doesn't notice that he's actually playing as an impostor and accidentally kills someone in front of other players

Will never kill Theo

Theo

Plays as cyan

As impostor, he will prioritize killing William first, followed by Arthur (if Arthur is not a co-impostor)

He will also sabotage the oxygen supply and try to land a kill while the characters are stacked on top of each other

Sticks with Vincent all the time, and won't hesitate to sell out his fellow impstors if any of them dares kill Vincent

Will never kill Vincent

Dazai

Normally plays as violet, wouldn't mind playing as lime when Jean is playing

His character wears the bird's nest hat

Follows around Isaac whenever he can. Follows him all the time after becoming a ghost

Accidentally presses the emergency button at the start of the game. Gets voted out for it

Likes to vent but doesn't really take advantage of it to secure kills, but will go after anyone who catches him venting

When he's about to be voted out, he will try to frame a random crewmate by dropping implications that they're his co-impostor

William

Plays as red

Doesn't really last long in the game; most likely to get voted out early on

Tries to prove his innocence by performing visual tasks... ends up dead eventually anyway

Doesn't rage quit even after he becomes a ghost but stops doing his tasks and just spends his time following around anyone who catches his attention

Sebastian

Plays as black. In charge of customizing the game settings

Heads straight into the admin or security room after finishing his tasks to see what the other players are up to

One of the first respondents to a sabotage, more likely to get ambushed

As an impostor, he will try to find a lone target who seems to be in the middle of doing a difficult task, then kill them

Reminds the other players to do their tasks. Will also voice suspicion on players who don't seem to be doing their tasks/or is faking it

Normally plays as white

Sticks with larger groups of people when doing tasks

Once she's done with her tasks, she finds a place where there's no vent nearby. Will run away and find a new hiding place if anyone approaches her

Likely to get caught in the act as an impostor. Won't try to deny the accusations and would actually admit that she's an impostor

Jean

Doesn't really play that often, will play as violet when he does

Will refrain from killing Mozart

Doesn't talk in the chat

Doesn't really bother with the tasks unless he thinks they could actually win via task completion

As an impostor, sometimes he would lock himself up in a room. No one knows whether this is intentional or not

Will only kill anyone who tries to follow him

Mozart

Doesn't really play that often, will play as white when he does

His character wears the tissue paper roll hat

Will refrain from killing Jean

Doesn't like the killing animation so as an impostor, he prefers to spam sabotages and let the other impostors do the killing

Doesn't report a dead body unless he has seen who killed it or no one else is nearby to avoid the risk of being falsely accused of self-reporting

Gets really angry when falsely accused. Rage quits when killed/voted out

Purebloods (+Castle) Edition

Vlad

Plays as white. In charge of customizing the game settings

His character wears the flower hat. He thinks it's cute

Sabotages the lights, kills the first person to attempt to fix the sabotage, vents. Frames whoever reports the body

Usually the first one to to accomplish all his tasks

As a ghost, he will follow around whoever has killed him or accused him. Will spam the sabotages if he died as an impostor, but will stop doing the tasks if he died as a crewmate

Would sometimes get into a heated argument with Comte in the chat where they would try to accuse and vote out each other

Faust

Plays as blue

His character wears the horn hat

Attempts double kill, co-impostor didn't get the memo (1)

Will find a potential target by checking for the player's locations on the admin panel

More daring with his kills and is quite skilled in framing other players

Stays near the emergency button once he's done with all his tasks

Charles

Plays as red

Co-impostor who didn't get the double kill memo (1)

Also: "FAUST WHY ARE YOU VOTING ME OUT I THOUGHT WE WERE ALLIES"

Faust hates being co-impostors with him tbh

As an impostor, he just kills whoever he ends up alone with. Would forget about the security camera sometimes and get caught in the act

Loves door sabotages. Unintentionally ends up locking his impostor with the body they just killed

Votes to skip voting for no reason

William

Plays as pink

Lasts longer when playing with this group because at least not everyone is trying to vote him out

Regardless of his role, he is always on the move and doesn't like staying in a particular place for too long

Doesn't respond to sabotages and delays carrying out tasks that take multiple steps to accomplish

Prefers to kill where the body is least likely to be found immediately, and refrains from passing by the area where he knows there's a body

Comte

Plays as yellow

His character wears the cheese hat

Attempts double kill, co-impostor didn't get the memo (2)

Prefers killing in rooms than in hallways

Thinks venting is too risky

Trusts only Leo and prefers to do his tasks alone most of the time

Monitors the other players by keeping an eye on the doorlog once he's done with all his tasks

Will follow Vlad around as a ghost

Leo

Plays as brown

Co-impostor who didn't get the memo (2)

Neglects his tasks as a crewmate altogether

Has way too much fun with the exploring the map using the vents and seeing how they are connected, likely to get caught venting

Too lazy to get out of his way to kill people when he's impostor, would rather spam reactor and oxygen sabotages

Once pretended responding to a sabotage... by going through the vents. Gets caught

I would also put Dazai and Sebastian here since they're part of Act 2 but it would be pretty much the same as it is in the mansion edition, only this time Dazai would be following Charles instead of Isaac I guess?

See also: Ikesen version

145 notes · View notes

magmagruntalayne · 5 years

Text

Heart of the Sea

The Sharpedo's Den was like most bars on this side of the mountain; so dimly lit, full of alcoholics whose disease was born out of tragedy, and hazy with cigarette smoke. Very few of the patrons were talking, most of them too focused on their drinks or their thoughts to bother trying to make friends. Hell, nobody was interested in making friends anymore since it was just as likely that the bastard that was making you laugh tonight would be dead by Thursday. Maybe he'd drown, or his debts would finally catch up with him; of course, that's if he was lucky. Most just starved to death or became the victim of someone, or something, that was hungry enough to see if they liked the taste of human flesh. It was like the Arceus-damned Donner Party out here nowadays.

Team Aqua had certainly made sure of that.

When Alayne had first joined Team Magma she had thought that the team rivaling her own was fairly harmless. Just a bunch of trainer dropouts pretending to be pirates while using the thin excuse of trying to clean up the oceans and making it a safer place for all sea-dwelling pokemon. Harmless, disorganized, and annoying. The complete opposite of Team Magma, the cause she had sold her soul to, which was a well-oiled machine: ruthless, tactical, and organized to the point it was almost maddening at times. A team dedicated to cleaning up the environment so that people and pokemon could live in harmony without the clash over land that was happening more and more often as people began to spread into wild areas. On paper, it was actually rather surprising to learn that Aqua and Magma were not actually two branches of the same team but competitors. From what she gathered they were one team, at some point long before she took up her red cowl, but the rift came from infighting over resources. Money, after all, was just as much of a necessary resource to a cause as clean water is to a living creature. Either way, the teams split and when she was approached with the offer of bettering not only her own future but the future of pokemon, Alayne sided with Maxie and the rest of Team Magma.

That's why she was so good at her job. She had been clashing with the members of Team Aqua even before both leaders had gone off the deep end. It was hard remembering just where both teams had gone wrong because the changes had been very subtle at first. Hell, she couldn't even remember which team had started this suicidal plunge that would ruin the world forever. Her head always said it was Archie since he's the one who had ruined the world after all so he was obviously the most logical choice, but her gut always said it was Maxie. Not that it mattered much, somewhere along the line both men began the hunt for the legendary pokemon: Groudon and Kyorge. Creators of the land and sea respectively.

At the time she never actually believed that either team would find the legendaries. Yes, she had believed they existed but at the same time, part of her believed that they were either dead, or gone, or because they were literal gods that they would never be found, let alone be bent to the wills of mere men.

Arceus must have been laughing its ass off when she first laid eyes on Kyorge.

Somehow, despite the ragtag nature of Archie's group of merry-men they actually did it. They found and summoned Kyorge to the surface in an attempt to have the god of the ocean cleanse the water of all the toxins that man had dumped into it. They had won. It was a fucking shame that it would come at the cost of the whole world.

Now instead of the world being made up of about 70% water, the currently estimated percentage was closer to 80% water, because who could have foreseen that a drawback to summoning the god that created the fucking oceans would lead to the water level rising by way fucking more than the world could take.

The waves and wind had torn Pacifidlog to pieces, ripping the wooden structures off of the Corsola colony it was founded on and dashed everything against the other rocks and islands nearby. Dewport and Slateport were just swallowed by the tide, although Slateport's famous lighthouse can still be seen when the tide is low, apparently, Dewport wasn't as lucky. Nothing was left of the little seaside town, not any kind of infrastructure either above or below water. If it wasn't for the fact that it was still in the memories of any who had ever visited it could almost be said that the town never existed. Not that Alayne could speak from first-hand experience. Exploring ruins for the lost hadn't been part of her job when she was still apart of Magma. Instead, her job had been trying to protect those places that Kyorge hadn't finished sinking, places like Rustboro, Lilycove, and her hometown of Mauville. The last of which had basically lost its whole east side due to the water rising out of Route 118. It was in the wreckage of her old home that she had been approached for a second time by a man with a job opportunity- only this time it wasn't some misguided attempt to try to save the world.

The same job had led her to leave Magma and its attempts to save the world it just as easily could have destroyed, to sipping cheap whiskey in the Sharpedo's Den as she watched the blond at the bar order another round for him and the brunette at his side.

"Ya know, you don't have to do this, right?"

The only sign that Trey's voice had startled her was the slight ripple in her cup from the tiny jerk she had given and the way her eyes cut sharply away from the couple at the bar to her companion. They both knew that she'd gotten so wrapped up in her work and brooding that she'd forgotten he was there, but he wasn't the type to complain, at least not anymore. Before the end of the world, he would have given her so much shit for it. Teasing her relentlessly until she was forced to silence him either with a look, a drink, or a kiss. The last being his all-time favorite. Not that she blamed him since it had been her favorite way of shutting him up too. Not that she had kissed him since Kyorge had resurfaced. That had broken them like it had broken all things. It didn't help that Trey had been considered Aqua's golden boy before Archie destroyed the world.

"I know," She replies, speaking mostly into her glass to avoid meeting his too green eyes. It had been a long time since she had been able to meet his gaze, even though he was trying desperately to meet hers now.

"Then don't. Nothing's stoppin' you from walkin' out right now. It'd be easier." He leans back in his chair, tucking his hands behind his head. He was trying so hard to sound nonchalant about the whole thing but Alayne wasn't stupid. She knew he was trying to talk her out of it. It was a neat trick that she always seemed to be able to do with Trey, most people had always told her that he had been hard to read. Always putting up a happy front that few people, if any besides her, could see past. He was deeply troubled under all the smiles and the party vibe he used to give off.

Right now, he was scared, which meant that her contact had been right, the couple at the bar were Team Aqua members- and Trey knew them.

"Easier would have been killing myself a long time ago." She shot back, a surprising amount of venom in her voice.

"Hey," He drops the nonchalant act and reaches across the table to grab her free hand, which had been resting on the tabletop, "Don't talk like that, Laney. Please."

Alayne wanted to fucking cry. She wanted to crawl across the tabletop, into his arms, and cry until there was nothing left to cry about. This is why they couldn't keep doing this. One little touch and she was back in the world before- before the world forgot what the sun looked like because the rainclouds had blocked it out. Back when she was happy for the first time in her life. Magma had given her a job, friends, Pokemon, and in its own way, it had given her Trey. Aqua had stolen all of that. Faces flashed through her mind of all the people and pokemon that she had lost. Misaki and Kira to the first failed attempt to retake Sootopolis. Adrian, Anders, and Oz to the mudslides. Kanno, Abrus, and Blue to the plagues. Leo in the riots. Ever starved and Ethan killed himself soon after. Milo to the bandits. Maxie to an assassination. Courtney, Tabitha, Cole, Mary, Lori, Felix, Bryan, Sandy-

She physically recoils from Trey's touch, spilling some of her drink, but successfully ripping herself from the flood of memories that threaten to overtake her. She couldn't do this. This is why they had to stop. He reminded her too much of all the things she lost, and they both knew that he was in part to blame for the reason they were all gone. Yet, as much as she couldn't stand him touching her because it grounded her too much in her shitty reality, Trey was the one thing that kept her from actually killing herself. And she was pretty sure that keeping her alive was the only thing that kept Trey from being completely consumed by the guilt of being a part of the reason the world had gone to shit. It was as if keeping her alive was the one thing that could redeem him in the end. Two desperate souls that couldn't be together but couldn't be apart either. It was fucking pathetic but it got her through. So she'd take it.

"Laney? Are yo-"

"Don't touch me." Alayne couldn't look at him, instead focusing on a spot on the floor, ignoring the way her vision swam with unshed tears.

She could almost feel him withdrawal his hand from her personal space even though he never touched her. She could hear the squeak of his chair on the floor as he settles back into it. Alayne closes her eyes. She couldn't afford to do this. Not now. She still had a job to do. If she was going to fall apart she could do it later.

"…Laney, please don't do this," His voice was a strained whisper, like a ghost trying to communicate through the void. It made something twist in her chest painfully, "Not them. They don't… Kegan didn't have a damn thin' to do with anythin' that happened. Let ‘em go."

She sets her drink down on the table, it was the first time she set the glass down all night, asides from the two times she had made the bartender refill it. Alayne drops her head into a waiting hand, covering her eyes so she could discreetly wipe the tears away. She was glad that she had decided to forgo wearing any kind of eye make-up tonight; it was always a good idea on nights like this. Not that seeing a woman with smudge make-up was anything anyone paid attention too anymore; likely she was either a prostitute at the end of her shift or mourning another soul that was lost to the endless rain. Arceus, she was so fucking weak for him. "You know if someone else catches up to them, they won't be as kind. You may be condemning them to the same fate as Shelly."

"Yeah, but they at least get a chance if you let ‘em go."

Alayne was quiet for a long time. She hated this part of her job, especially on nights when Trey was with her. She already had to go through this moral dilemma every-fucking-time she caught up to an ex-Aqua member but Trey always added an extra ton of guilt whenever he decided to tag along. One would think that with her kill count these debates would fucking stop, but it felt like they were only getting worse. She could barely even justify to herself anymore that she was merciful compared to most other bounty hunters. Well, she was now. She was a lot more violent when she first started taking revenge on old Aqua members. Now the poisons she used were always fast acting and were so painless that sometimes her targets even smiled at her when their hearts finally stopped. Hell, the fact that she was going so soft was probably part of the reason Trey had decided to show up tonight. He saw who her targets were, and knew he could probably talk her out of this. Bastard.

"I fucking hate you,"

"It’d be easier if you actually did." He uses her own words against her. It was so sudden and out of character that it made Alayne lift her head out of her hand, and actually look at him for the first time that night. Trey was watching her with such sad eyes and a matching smile. Even though she knew she looked as rough as the rest of the patrons in this hole in the wall, he somehow managed to look exactly like he did before the end of days. Complete with that green t-shirt with the kecleon silhouette she bought for him on his last birthday. Looking as if he was unfazed by all the tauroshit around them- unless you were looking at his eyes. They were just as haunted as everyone else’s, only his seemed to corrupt every expression that crossed his face, even his smile. Arceus, what she wouldn't do to make him smile like they used to.

Alayne sighs wistfully and glances over her shoulder. The brunette was sitting alone at the bar. Looks like she had missed her chance. She had been planning on ambushing him in the bathroom, then catching the girl when she came looking for her friend. She stands, noting the way that Trey seemed to jerk like he was going to try to stop her until he noticed that she was already waving him off. She missed her chance, and she was pretty sure that if she killed these two Trey would make himself scarce for a while. She wasn't sure what either one of them would do with the silence. It had gotten so bad last time that they had stopped talking- she really had been close to killing herself before Trey appeared to literally talk her off the edge. She wasn't ready to chase him away again.

Grabbing her glass and her purse, the ex-Magma made her way over to the bar and leans the gap between the seat the blond had been sitting in and the brunette's spot as she waits for the bartender to notice her. She didn't miss the way that the girl angled herself away just slightly or that she was only drinking a soda instead of something a little more… alcoholic. The bartender appears in front of her, and instead of exchanging words, she fishes her wallet out of her bag and passes him her credit card. He nods, shuffling farther down the bar to close out her tab. She takes a sip of the last of her drink as she watches him head to the register. "You two need to get out of here."

The girl next to her startles, turning to actually face Alayne. She was adorable. All freckles, big brown eyes, and a pretty round face that probably lit up a room when she smiled. There was no doubt about it now that she could actually see the girl up close. It was, in fact, Kegan Roth, ex-Aqua grunt, and close friend to Trey. She hadn't been a hundred percent sure that this girl had been Kegan but she had just assumed the moment she laid eyes on Blake, that his companion had been the farm girl. It seemed that once again her instincts had been right on point.

"W-what?"

"You're being hunted. Or at least were, but people will figure out sooner or later that I missed my mark."

The blood drained from the girl's face and Alayne eyes her as Kegan reached for her jacket. She either had a weapon in there or was just going to bolt. Judging by the look of pure terror in her eyes, she was betting on the latter rather than the former. Funny, she had always thought Trey's old friends had more moral than this. Then again, she did have the poor girl cornered, and the gentleman who had probably kept her safe all this time wasn't around to protect her. Although he'd be back soon enough, and she'd rather be gone by that time. She glances up to the mirror behind the bar her subconscious telling her that she was being watched. Trey was still sitting at the table, staring at her, and when he sees her looking waves at her with that same tragic smile.

"Trey says hi, by the way."

This stops Kegan in her tracks. The country girl sits up straighter and twists to look around the bar. She had this look of excitement on her face that made everything in Alayne's chest twist painfully such a way that made her want to drop to her knees and sob. It had been so long since she had seen such pure hope like that. No wonder Trey wanted to protect her. She was so innocent and open. "Trey's here? But I thought he'd-"

"He did." Alayne cuts her off quickly, breaking her gaze from Trey's in the mirror. She closes her eyes and slams back the last of her drink. It burned as it when down, but it chased the taste of acid out of her mouth. The glass hits the counter with more force than she intended, and when she opens her eyes the bartender is standing in front of her with his hand outstretched. Waiting for her to take her card and receipt. Kegan had gone quiet and was bowing her head.

Alayne takes the paper and plastic, shoving it into her pocket. She nods at the bartender and turns her back on the two. "Good luck."

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Blake coming back down the hallway from where the restrooms were. She could feel his eyes on her and even though he moved out of her line of sight, she had no doubt he was already back at Kegan's side- being filled in about the current situation and how their lives were spared mostly on a whim. This would most likely be the last time she would ever see the two. Even if she was instructed to keep them as a bounty Alayne doubted that she would ever chase after them again. Somehow it felt right. Maybe because in a previous life, she had been expecting to be on the run like they were. Although she always expected it to be because Maxie had figured out that she had fallen in love with Trey, and by some twist of fate he had fallen for her too-not because she was at fault for ending the world.

She passes by their table which was empty, minus Trey's untouched beer. Without thinking she reaches out and snags the bottle, bringing it to her lips. It was warm and the taste made her crinkle her nose in disgust but she still drank it. Part of her was expecting the bartender to try to stop her as she pushed open the door to head out into the rain, bottle still in hand, but he didn't. Just another example of how much of a shit people gave now that they realized that the world was on borrowed time. Pausing under the tin awning, Alayne carefully swings her purse around and with her free hand began the dig for her umbrella. Like all necessary things it somehow seemed to have ended up at the very bottom of her bag, regardless of the fact that she had just used it a few hours ago.

‘Thanks.'

The voice was so quiet that there should have been no way that she heard it over the sound of the rain beating on the metal overhead. Then again she guessed that was the upside of having voices in one's head. No matter how softly he spoke, Alayne could always hear him.

For a long time, she's silent, just rummaging through her bag. Finally, she unearths her prize, still damp from her walk to the bar. With the press of a button, the travel umbrella unfolds, snapping into shape with a click that was drowned out by the rain. Alayne shoulders the umbrella, before bringing the bottle back to her lips to finish it off. One day, she probably would be able to enjoy drinking beer but for now, it was just another reminder of the fact that Trey… wasn't actually here anymore. Once the bottle was empty, she set it gently on the edge of the steps before stepping out into the downpour.

"You're welcome."

#I have no idea if I'll actually come back to this blog #this is just the first thing I've written since I've stopped writing here #And some select people wanted to read it #enjoy the sads

9 notes · View notes