A man and a woman platonically raising a child together and not falling in love has to be the biggest plotwist in the Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves movie AND my favorite part

dungeons & dragons: honor among thieves + text posts bonus:

is this not the coolest shit you've ever seen. why did practical effects ever fall out of fashion (answer: capitalism)

ive now watched the movie and it turns out that's his name

I love you goofy looking aarakocra, dragonborn and tabaxi. I love you hiring bridgerton guy just to be hot and untouchable and having his first major scene staged so that one tiddy is always artfully exposed. I love you well choreographed fight scenes and a beautifully chaotic representation of six seconds of combat. I love you compelling plot point of attunement requiring a successful role with your spellcasting modifier. I love you solving puzzles by shoving round p(ainting)egs into square holes. I love you forcing Justice Smith to do a British accent for no reason. I love you level 20 NPCs who can’t help the party against the big bad for ambiguous reasons. I love you bigby’s hand slap fights. I love you Nat 20s on potato attacks. I love you owlbears, mimics and gelatinous cubes. I love you dragons, I love you dungeons. I love you dnd movies that love dnd.

My favorite part of Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves is that if you don't play DnD, it's a solid fantasy movie, but if you DO play DnD, you can feel in your soul the table talk that's almost certainly happening over the events of the movie. Like...

"Are you guys sure you don't want to take a perception check?"

"I said we jump out the window."

or

"And he turns and walks directly northwards away from you guys."

"The map shows a rock-"

"HE WALKS OVER THE ROCK."

or

"Fuck it, I throw a potato."

"Okay... roll for potato, I guess."

"That was a 20."

or

"I know we won, but I have bonus actions and I'm going to use them, damn it."

100% my favourite part of the d&d movie was that holga had pit hair. i zoomed the fuck in on that. YES your female barbarian has armpit hair YES she does YES you fucking get it, yes this makes her a million times hotter. good fucking lord

Xenk Yendar’s Fight Scene set to:

Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight) - ABBA

(YouTube link)

⚔️: Now isn't the tim- 🪕: AAAAAH SHUT UP SHUT UP

I love each and every one of these himbos you have no idea

I saw the dnd movie with my partner and took away only what was intended.

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves making Chris Pine's character a bard and then having him fight by using his lute as a melee weapon whacking people left and right with it? Absolutely hilarious

Okay so I just saw the new Dungeons and Dragons movie

gotta say from the moment they went with the "let's dive out the window onto the Aarakocra" plan even as the council was like "WE PARDONED YOU" I knew it would be great because that is the exact kind of stupidity a D&D party would get up to

His Autistic Swag has bewitched me both Body and Soul.

I know people wanted the post credit scene for the DnD movie to be the actors playing the game, but I think it would have been infinitely funnier if it was instead the characters at a table trying desperately to figure out the date for their next heist. Next weekend? No, there's a festival. Tuesday. No, have a tournament. Any time in the next month??? Nope, there's some noble that half the group already agreed to go rough up, they'll be out of town. Oh hey a letter from Xenk, he can come on Thursdays. Are you penpals with Xenk?! Don't worry about it.

Specifically D&D™️ things about that new movie that I enjoyed very much

The entire party having low intelligence/wisdom bc let’s be real who doesn’t have either one of those as their dump stat

Receiving a magic item from the DM -> forgetting about it -> a party member going WAIT DONT WE HAVE THAT -> everyone using the shit out of the magic item and completely wrecking the DM’s plans

Travelling between locations that are geographically days/weeks away takes <5 minutes because the DM doesn’t want to do random encounters + the party doesn’t have a ranger who needs to feel useful by tracking

No healer + no rogue/ranger = everyone is constantly exhausted and has no idea of the traps/monsters in their surroundings ever

Druid being the most OP member of the party

The DM’s friend/sibling coming over to play their high level paladin from another campaign for an afternoon and then just noping out

The DM planning an elaborate battle arena with multiple well thought out stages and the players immediately find a way to circumvent it