ocean's 11 au where jack is danny and shitty is rusty and bitty is linus; shitty finds out their mark is dating jack's ex-wife camilla and is unhappy with jack for putting the job at risk to get her back (and for not telling him that he's still in love with her). he's reasonably doubtful when jack claims the job has nothing to do with that.

except jack is telling the truth, and when the team finds out it really complicates his truly inept attempts to flirt with their newest recruit.

Listen.

If it's not them.

If it's not the cast of Check, Please!... If it's not the members of Samwell Men's Hockey...

If it's not Nurseydex, Holsom, Shitty/Lardo, any other OMG Check, Please ship...

If it's not Eric Bittle and Jack Zimmermann, Zimbits, the light of my life

If it's not them, I don't want it.

They always pull me back in, how do they keep doing this!?

i genuinely don't think a story's worldbuilding and lore has ever drawn me in the way that check please did. it's been years and i still think about it every day. the characters and plot were always superb but i think what has stuck with me the most is the depth of the settings and how everything feels so lived in and tangible. everyone wants to make a fake world and town and university but no one else has EVER done it that well

I think there was even worse stuff than the whole art thing I talked about last night going on in the depths of Ao3 at the time but I have & had a very low bar for what it takes to make me close out of a tab so I don’t think I encountered quite as much of that

HEY YOU

Do you like Dex? Do you like Holster? Are you a fellow degenerate? if you answered ''YES'' to at least one of these, then you should check out this HoltzDex fic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54256243

''no regrets, 'cause you're my sunset'' By: Marinanoon

Summary:

“You’re a guy,” Holster says slowly, his eyes slowly trailing down Dex’s frame where he’s slouched over his laptop. “Astute observation.” Holster breaks and makes the puppy-dog eyes again. “Will you sleep with me, Dex? Please?” “What the fuck, Holster?” - Dex has never slept with a guy, but is not entirely opposed to the idea. Holster is here to help.

This was surprisingly sweet for an 18+ fic tbh, I absolutely recommend it if, like me, you like seeing Dex flustered <3

ok, who on smh drinks pickle juice for their post workout tho

i just think what if nursey had a childhood broadway actor phase where he was in a bunch of shows as a kid but then decided to go the academic route when he was older. but he can still sing and dance and act. just thinking

genuinely

i know it's dumb, but it really bugs me when fic writers call Samwell an Ivy.

Samwell is made up, people, and the Ivy league has been set at 8 schools since 1954.

thank you for coming to my bitchy little ted talk.

been a long time since any of us posted here… maybe it’s time to throw some more of my baseless ideas into the void

-el

(also, we still take submissions!)

thought of the day: shoveling

I feel like every person has a different shoveling technique. Where do you start? How do you hold the shovel? What motion do you make with the shovel and your body? etc etc.

When SMH has to shovel the porch and sidewalk, I think there’s big arguments about how people shovel. Jack is a machine at shoveling, so naturally Holster thinks he’s purposefully baiting him into a fight. Dex is also a machine at shoveling due to long winters in Maine. Bitty does his best to get out of shoveling. “It’s too cold” “you play an ice sport, Bittle”

Chowder is SO EXCITED his first winter!! He gets the whole team to build a snow family, fort, and then initiates a snowball fight.

Spending my night by finishing my hundredth reread of Check, Please and getting emotional.

hello i’m the op of the dex @ chuck e. cheese post and i think you’ll be delighted to know that not only do many employees have to wear the suit, they also have to be out of it and do other slightly humiliating things! it’s not just one guy in the suit, it’s a bunch of people on a rotating system. so people absolutely know that it’s him. also, if you aren’t in the suit, you might have to do a thing called “waking up chuck e” that involves dancing on a stage to a video with a bunch of children until chuck e. cheese shows up. (all of this is information gathered from the friend who worked there so it might be a little off.)

oh my god???? oh my god fhghjffgafjkfa thank you so much for this information i'm losing my mind. like at least the humiliation is shared so there's some solidarity there? but the whole "waking up chuck e" is bonkers like its for the kids i get it but oakafkjhfalkasjf afl;ashl. dex takes the job even though he submitted his resume to the wrong online job posting because they were the first to get back to him and because he needed the money and because "how bad can it be he's used to kids" and it's bad. but he doesn't hear back from any other places so he just. keeps working there. and lies to the boys about where he works because he's like "why the fuck would my friends ever end up in chuck e cheese they're whole adults" and that is his own foolish mistake because we all know the smh would love to organize an excursion to chuck e cheese. holster books his birthday party there. he informs the groupchat of this. dex checks his phone mid shift and his soul leaves his body when he reads the message.

i’m weird in the way that i can tell you all of a fictional cast of character’s favorite workout exercises.

Chapters: 8/8 Fandom: Check Please! (Webcomic) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Derek "Nursey" Nurse/William "Dex" Poindexter, Chris "Chowder" Chow & Derek "Nursey" Nurse & William "Dex" Poindexter, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Adam "Holster" Birkholtz/Justin "Ransom" Oluransi, Larissa "Lardo" Duan/Shitty Knight, Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann Characters: William "Dex" Poindexter, Derek "Nursey" Nurse, Chris "Chowder" Chow, Larissa "Lardo" Duan, Justin "Ransom" Oluransi, Adam "Holster" Birkholtz, Eric "Bitty" Bittle, Jack Zimmermann, Shitty Knight Additional Tags: Bodyswap, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, hockey things?, canon-typical alcohol use, feat. the mental gymnastics involved in falling for someone who's currently inhabiting your body, Racism, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Microaggressions, Friendship, bad decisions made while drunk, Podfic, Podfic Length: 5-6 Hours Summary:

[5hr 32m 45s] The thing is, he’s had study nights and TV marathons in Chowder’s room. He’s gotten stoned in Shitty’s, and Lardo’s, crashed on Jack’s floor after a kegster, gone to Bitty’s for advice, and checked Ransom and Holster’s for ghosts. If it were anyone else’s, Nursey would at least have some indicator of what was going on, because he’d be able to recognise the decorations, the layout. But Derek Nurse wakes up in William Poindexter’s room and has no idea where the fuck he is. [Written by lenaballena.]