#cw child loss
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day 3 of 12 days of the maxiel advent calendar lol. this one is sad in a bittersweet way. content warning for a discussion focused around the loss of a newborn child. Please don't read if that is something too upsetting to you <3 set in the same universe as this.
Underneath the apple tree in their garden, there’s a patch of daffodils.
They bloom every springtime, the vibrant shades of sunshine yellow enough to light up whatever room they are put into. The first bunch, Max always likes to arrange in the vase Grace and Joe gave them as a wedding gift, the second, third and fourth into each of the babies rooms. The air of the ranch becomes sweet with their scent, and at lunchtimes when Livia and Oli are called inside from playing, sticky pollen covers their fingertips.
“Papa,” Livia says to him on one of these September days, and Max knows to brace himself for a question by the curiosity laced in her voice. Like always, she does not disappoint.
“What happened to our big brother?”
The breath catches in Max’s throat.
He and Daniel had always agreed they would never keep their first son’s existence a secret from their children, no matter how hard it might be to help them understand. The idea of Theo becoming something that could only be spoken about in hushed whispers at convenient times was too painful when every day they felt his loss. The absence of a fourth pitch of giggles to hear playing from the next room every day, a second curly head for them to tuck safely into bed each night.
But this is the first time Livia has ever mused the ‘why’, of that out loud.
She is drawing a picture titled my family, her ‘homework’ for nursery. Max can see their flattering stick figure portraits, her and Oli almost as big as he and Daniel are, while Toni resembles an earthworm on the ground beside the four of them. In the top right-hand corner, just underneath the sun, she has drawn her eldest brother, complete with a set of pink angel wings.
“Me and Daddy told you, remember?” Max reminds her, but gently. His patience for his children is endless in a way it never was for racing. “Theo is in heaven.”
Max isn’t sure he believes in heaven, knows for a fact Daniel doesn’t, but he also knows how important it is for children to have good things to have faith in and to hope for, like the tooth fairy or Santa Clause. A source of comfort, the way his mum lighting candles used to be for him.
Livia nods seriously, busy scribbling what Max guesses is supposed to be Daniel’s hair if the twisting lines are anything to go by. Then, seemingly no longer satisfied with this answer she asks, “Why is he not with us?”
Daniel is out with Oli and Toni at the aquarium. The only reason Max and Livia aren’t with them is because in thirty minutes, they have to leave for the under 5’s football training Livia loves so much.
She get’s that from her Papa, Daniel likes to remind him, as though mashing keys on FIFA is comparable to the overexcited way their daughter squeals when she scores a goal.
Alone, Max feels totally unprepared for this. Daniel is so much better at wrapping the world up into words their children can understand and make peace with. For a moment, he almost asks her for a cuddle, the selfish reassurance of her warmth and the rise and fall of her chest as he holds her, but he doesn’t want to clue her into how hard this is for him.
He is her Papa, one of the two people who are meant to stand between her and all the bad in the world. Instead, he reaches to tuck a strand of blonde hair behind her ear as she continues to draw and thinks back to how Theo’s little tuft had been all brown.
“When he was born, he was very poorly,” Max explains, and though it has been a very long time, it is as easy as anything to remember him in his hospital bed, tubes, wires and needles all protruding from his skin, tinged a sickly grey. “He wasn’t strong, like you, Oli and Toni.”
“Because he didn’t eat his carrots?” Livia asks, looking up at Max with owlish eyes, and Max has to laugh, charmed by her childish logic, her belief in everything he and Daniel tell her. He knows this phase won’t last forever, that they’ll soon be replaced with teachers and google, but for now he lets himself enjoy it.
“No,” he promises, shaking his head. “No, because something went wrong, when he was inside the tummy. Remember like me and Daddy told you that you used to be, also?”
She nods, enthusiastic suddenly to show off her knowledge.
“You had to find a lady to keep us in their belly so we could be borned,” she recites, and Max smiles. It feels like yesterday she was as small as Theo, and now she is big and smart, and her own little person, the way all of his babies got to be except for one.
“Exactly,” he encourages. “Well, when Theo was in the belly, something bad happened, so that when he was born he was sick. It made him very tired, and so he had to go to sleep forever, in heaven.”
Livia chews her lip like that still might not be enough to appease her. Max is just thinking about how to reword it, when-
“Will I ever get to see him?” She asks, like this has been the real reason for her line of questioning all along.
Thinking about the patch of daffodils where he and Daniel scattered the ashes of their first born’s, Max considers telling her that she sees him every spring, when Daniel goes out to collect a bunch to place in vases all around their home. That in a way, Theo has watched over her every year from his spot on their dresser, bringing added sunshine into their bedroom.
She is too little now though to truly understand. In time she will, but for now he wants to hold onto all the ways she is still his baby for just a little while longer. He is in no hurry for her to grow up.
“I don’t think so,” he says honestly, with an apologetic smile. “But I think he see’s you, watches you and your brother and sister play from the sky.”
Livia pauses, like maybe she has more questions and again Max braces himself.
“Okay,” is all she says though, and then she is picking up her crayons again. Max can’t help but lean over to kiss the top of her head, then tickle her side until she giggles, and swats him away telling him seriously, “Papa, you will make my drawing wonky.”
“Sorry, liefje,” he says, matching her tone, and then reaches for his phone.
Livy just asked me about Theo, he texts to Daniel. The last thing in their message thread is a photo of Oli, nose and palms pressed against the shark tank, and beneath it four words, our brave little fucker.
Unsurprisingly it’s only a few seconds before Daniel is typing a response.
its normal for her to have questions, and Max resists the urge to roll his eyes fondly, because of course, Max knows this.
Then, big kiss coming your way in approx 78 minutes, Mr Verstappen-Ricciardo.
Then, I love you.
I love you too, Max texts back, pocketing his phone. There isn’t much to be said over text, or even in person maybe, other than an repeat of what Livia asked, what Max explained to her. Everything else has already been said and these days can the pain can be shared with a simple kiss, and an evening holding each other as they watch their children play.
Turning his attention back to Livia now, her little hands clenched tightly in fists around a black crayon, he notices the strange circle shapes she is drawing over angel Theo’s eyes.
“What are these?” He asks bemused, pointing to them.
“Glasses Papa,” she says, like she thinks this should be very obvious. “Theo needs them to see us, if he is so high up.”
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I Have Never
I have never lost a child,
but for a while
I dreamed every night
of babies.
Beautiful, tiny, demanding,
perfectly fascinating,
you know...
babies.
I loved each one.
On the bad nights,
I'd wake in the early hours
with the feeling of small fingers
clasped around mine,
confused to find myself
bereft.
On other nights,
as the dream progressed
the child would vanish
and I'd run, frantic
through uncaring crowds,
searching, crying
begging for help.
I'd wake in a panic
of tears
and tangled sheets.
On the worst nights
my search would end
happily
with a reunion.
I'd spend many glorious years
raising a growing infant,
or many hours besotted
with the baby held safe
in my arms.
I’d be blissfully content,
gazing at my childs familiar features,
then wake up.
And my empty arms would shake
in horror,
and the perfect face
I knew so well
mere moments ago
would painfully
slowly
fade.
-acklum
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you only said about him that he is rainbow child!
Ooh that! He’s a rainbow baby. That doesn’t refer to his queerness but that seems like an easy association to make.
A rainbow baby is a baby born after miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, molar pregnancy, termination for medical reasons, stillbirth or neonatal death. The rainbow symbol has been used by members of the baby loss community for many years. (via Tommys.org)
I did mistakenly write 'child' instead of 'baby', I fixed it in the post you were referring to!
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Mr. Landry’s Solution
CW: losing children, apocalyptic imagery and themes
Why was Bill Landry miserable?
There were theories on the matter. Lazy and directionless, riding out the years, not chasing after anything. A wife who gave him the boot up north. Lost his kids, someone said. Failed at something or another and just gave up. Might’ve been sending money to somewhere—sure enough, he ought to have plenty saved. Living wasn’t expensive in Lawson. Where’d his money go? Why was he still living in a two-room apartment while his hair turned grey?
…and on the first day, the color of blood became dull red, nearer to black than scarlet. People forced themselves to move, like wading through tar. Some didn’t have the strength to overcome that horrible inertia. They found the arms of a loved one, a friend, anybody, and became still as stone.
…and on the second day, a great groaning went up—
One neighbor swore he was strung out. Started using when he was young and didn’t have the sense to grow out of it. Maybe lost that sense along the way. It’s a shame. It’s just a shame, y’know?
…and on the third day, the sun did not rise. Something else took its place, a thing which you could feel—squirming, tactile interference which emanated from its direction—but not see. That was the day that all our satellites came raining down.
…and on the fourth day, plantkind wriggled free of its curse. Their teeth and woody voiceboxes and atrophied muscles were returned to them. Their frenzied whistling filled the night.
This kind of talk was the only reason anybody in the world had an eye on poor Bill. They watched him shuffle downstairs, off to work, and back again from the gas station he shopped at with plastic bags in hand. Getting fat, getting quiet, didn’t brush his yellow teeth. But that didn’t matter. He fixed things down at a warehouse and didn’t need to talk to anyone but his boss.
Jayson Davis, his downstairs neighbor, was smoking by the curb, barefoot in a plastic chair. Saw Bill come home with an extra bag in hand, gave him a smile and a wave on the night of March 14th, 1986, at around 5:45. Later, they pumped Jayson for testimony, for every detail, like he was a sinful little amoeba under a microscope. He was the last one to see Bill that evening, and the psychometry guys made damn sure that every word they got out of him was truth. Subjective truth, at least.
…and on the fifth day, ash fell like snow, orange cinders twisting in the still air. Like snow, it soaked up sound and muted the world.
…and on the sixth day, the ocean digested themself and all who lived within their depths. The fever of their sickness rose into the atmosphere, congealing there as mucous storms which poured hot rain across the land, and ash became caustic mud, and plants became fibrous sludge, and the paralyzed people were perfectly preserved and maybe, God willing, weren’t conscious anymore.
There were people still hanging on to life, holding fast to concrete ruins and sealed tunnels. Forcing themselves to keep moving and never let their eyelids droop. People of corrugated will or inexhaustible devotion or hideous fire.
Bill Landry disappeared into his apartment, and he stayed there for thirty-six hours and about twenty-nine minutes, if the investigation had it right. When he came out, dehydrated and starving, nobody even noticed.
Who cared about Bill Landry? Somewhere in Morocco, on March 15th, at 1:22 AM Central Time, the last child was born. Most of the ones born in the hours before—and all the ones after—were stillborn.
…and on the seventh day, the thing which had replaced the sun gave birth. Its child inclined a lobe of itself toward the Earth, and the projected spirit of Bill Landry thought it caught a glimpse of what came next.
It was the Navy that figured out why. Called up their contacts in the Pacific. Between them and the Ph.Ds on ice down at the magnetic pole, they found the causal lines and followed them back to a self-taught psychic in Lawson, Oklahoma. Sent a team and snatched him up.
Enhanced interrogation. You know the drill. What they found out is that Mr. Landry did his own share of following the lines, all the way back to the Source itself. And when he got there, on March 14th, he force-inputted it with some homebrew anti-Source until the whole thing caved in on itself.
Forecast is this: about four decades from now, there won’t be any coming back. According to Bill, droning in monotone from his solitary cell under the meds that keep his spirit locked down in his body, that’s good enough.
Safe, he says.
______________________
@flashfictionfridayofficial prompt was “Pure Imagination.” Decided to piggyback off an idea I’ve had kicking around for a bit. Hope it isn’t too depressing.
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We've had a couple of juvenile skeletons in recently, all from the Bronze Age (so between 3000-4000 ish years old) and as I'm the only one who's in my department rn I've had to process them. They've been gone a long time but it's still upsetting at times
#cw#tw#cw child loss#child loss#tw child loss#death#cw death#archaeology#i think my grief over them is still respectful#but the bones are just so little#which is really hard#im making space to grieve outside of work bc i still need to carry out my job#walking the line between respectful and trying not to break down at work is kinda hard too
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CW: Miscarriage/child loss
this woman makes me so fucking mad, the amount of content she makes about “suspiciously large blood clots” is actually vile. i truly don’t think people who make these kinds of jokes understand how deeply traumatizing a miscarriage can be to a person. coming from the perspective of someone whose mom had a miscarriage when i was 9 years old that shit is not fucking funny!!!! i remember finding out my mother was pregnant again, i was going to have a second younger sister and after my mom’s miscarriage i remember my grandma went to a sweat and ceremony for the baby’s traditional name. her name was red earth.
my sister died, miscarriages happen every single day and people’s children die and you turn it into content for your 5.5 million followers to consume.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMFqj4dWX/
i can’t add another video so i’ll link this one. this video is beyond vile honestly, to the people losing their rights to bodily autonomy, the Indigenous people who never fucking had bodily autonomy in the first place, it’s sick. like what possesses you to think this is funny and post it.
#all of her content is so vile tbh like it’s just straight up gross a lot of it#like it truly gives me anxiety i have to block her and delete this video off my phone once i post this#cw miscarriage#cw child loss
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The Weekly Gravy #175
Salt for Svanetia/Соль Сванетии/Sol’ Svanetii (1930) – ***½
CW: child death; animal cruelty.
I might’ve come to Mikhail Kalatozov earlier than any other Soviet director. His last film, the international co-production The Red Tent, was an early favorite of mine (I really need to rewatch and review it), even though I’ve only seen the international release print and not the original cut, which…
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#2023 Films#2023 in Film#CW animal cruelty#CW child loss#Соль Сванетии#Film Reviews#Nimona#Salt for Svanetia#The Weekly Gravy#The Zone of Interest
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Kin stuff
I don't want to be pregnant ever again. But my arms feel empty. I, feel empty, and I want my babies back. I want my son, I want my Hope, I want my pups, I want my little angel. I'm just so empty. I keep trying to curl up around something that just isn't there, around a baby that's gone. I keep trying to wrap my hands around a big round baby bump, and something hurts in my soul when I realize my stomach is flat. I dunno why it hurts. It just does.
#kin tag#|greenleaf#|never again#|there were dragons when i was a boy#|blood like chlorophyll#tw child loss#cw child loss#pregnancy cw
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Cw: general discussion of child loss
I love the sound of her wings but the scene with the baby is so hard to watch/read 😭💔 both in the comics and the show.
I get why Neil include this but yeah I kinda want it cut 😖
Personal: I was so scary of this when kid was a baby, I remember obsessively check their breathing.
You get a lot of advice of what you can do to limit the risks. But as far as I know no one know exactly why this happen and it will come out of nowhere.
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Tag 9 People You Want to Get to Know Better
Thanks for the tag, @sadiebwrites!
Favorite color: dark green, closely followed by orange
Currently reading: A Court of Wings and Ruin by Sarah J. Maas. (I finally picked it up after years of people either loving or hating the series. It's a fun ride, and the exact kind of turn-my-brain-off reading I need right now.)
Last song: That I picked myself? Pretty sure it was Unstoppable by Sia. That I listened to? Toddler Music. I think it was a counting song about bananas.
Last series: Kenobi
Last movie: Apollo 13
Sweet/Savoury/Spicy: Spicy usually, but I enjoy a good chocolate treat, too.
Currently working on: Honestly? Myself. Our son was stillborn about a month ago at 37 weeks and it's been incredibly difficult to do much more than the basics. Before that, pregnancy had me so wiped out that I wasn't doing much creatively. I'm hoping that as the metaphorical fog continues to lift that I'll be able to get back to writing something.
Since it's apparently honesty on main hours, anxiety has rendered me unable to make a tag list for fear of upsetting someone (yes I will be talking to the doctor about this sudden raging anxiety when I go for my 6 week postpartum checkup). If you're seeing this and want to participate, consider yourself tagged (please tag me so I see it?)
#get to know you game#cw pregnancy loss#cw child loss#sorry to bring the vibe down#screaming into the void
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"Someone's last words" - minicomic, post-RoP
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death doesn't discriminate
between the sinners and the saints
it takes and it takes and it takes
and i keep living anyway
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i love reading your sonic loreposts i was wondering if you could please explain archie charmy to me, i have heard stuff and i am so curious but i am not a comics in general kinda person. the lsd poisoned friend or the brain damage literally just anything that happens to him your pick
hi anon i’m just going to go over everything that happens to archie charmy pre-reboot so i hopefully never have to talk about it after this. i'm sorry i'm so so sorry
Archie Charmy is subject to a lot of controversy and discussion because despite his limited role in the comics, he goes through some of the most batshit insane character and plot beats in the whole series (and that you’ve already mentioned). I’ll be skimming over some of the more boring parts, but the wild stuff I'll go pretty in-depth with.
I’ll also be attempting to explain WHY all of this happens to Charmy Bee of all characters, taking into account the context of the story, what was happening behind the scenes in the writer’s room, and even comic trends in general. I want to try and keep away from the very reactionary “wow archie sonic is sooooo crazy” discussion that happens around this stuff and hopefully provide a little more useful analysis. i talk about comic PSAs for a while so be warned
There are some very, very important content warnings that are coming with Archie Charmy lore: warning for non-consensual drug use and overdose (specifically LSD), child death, genocide, implied ableism, memory loss, implied age regression, breif homophobia mention (not related to charmy)
this is going to be a very long one. charmy lore under the cut
INTRODUCTION - CHAOTIX
Charmy Bee’s first appearance in Archie Sonic is in the Knuckles’ Chaotix special, which adapts the first game he appeared in. This issue introduces the entire Chaotix cast (six new characters) in a mere four pages, so Charmy doesn’t make much of an impression other than “bee who likes to explore and adventure.” He lacks that annoying little brother personality that he has in most Sonic media, and he’ll often speak with language that feels extremely out of character for the Charmy that most people know.
This is because this version of Charmy is based off of his character description from the Knuckles’ Chaotix game manual. Despite the series being based off of the video game franchise, the Archie Sonic writers were often given very little information about upcoming game releases from SEGA when they were asked to adapt them into the comics. Often they had to go digging for the canonical materials themselves - for example, the only way they were able to adapt Sonic Adventure into the comics is because Patrick Spaziante (one of the comic’s artists) had a Japanese version of the game that he bought himself. They had no English translation and zero guidance from SEGA, so they had to attempt to piece the story together without SEGA's help. This was the case with most of the game adaptations, and it was honestly a miracle that they had access to the manual for Knuckles’ Chaotix at all.
There’s just one problem: the manual for Knuckles’ Chaotix describes a version of Charmy that is very, very different from the one we know of today. It describes a 16-year old that is… sophisticated?
(sorry for the low quality, there aren't many images of the manual. also fun fact, there was no age for Charmy listed in the original Japanese manual)
Charmy's differing age and personality will lead to many, many problems, as the writers decided to give the “sophisticated” Charmy darker stories. This brings us to the Knuckles the Echidna mini-series.
The Knuckles mini-series is. Bad. Charmy Bee is certainly there for the first few issues (as are most of the Chaotix), but he doesn’t get much focus until issue 13.
I don’t know how to put this in a way that doesn’t sound extremely blunt: This is the issue where Charmy’s best friend overdoses on LSD and dies.
PART 1 - MELLO
Charmy's best friend is named Mello Bee. This is his first and last appearance in the series.
Mello started feeling strange on their return trip from Happyland, a sketchy theme park that recently reopened under new management. Charmy isn't sure why Mello died, but Constable Reminton (essentially the sheriff of Echidnopolis) reveals that there have been a series of cases similar to Mello's - cases where people were suffering from… Lemon Sundrop Dandelion poisoning.
The Chaotix go to Happyland to see if they can find the source of the poisoning, but what they don't know is that it's actually laced into the food. The manager of Happyland, Renfield T. Rodent, has been lacing the park's chili dogs with LSD in hopes of making everyone addicted to them. However, the amount of LSD he's been putting into the food is too much for most people to handle. This is probably the most insane paragraph I've had to write for one of these loreposts
Unknown to the Chaotix, they all start eating the chili dogs during their investigation (except for Julie-Su and Knuckles, who is absent) and start tripping balls.
Continuing the story into issue 14, Charmy’s LSD trip reveals that he’s actually the prince of a bee colony and has been running away from his responsibilities as a member of the royal family.
Charmy is knocked out for the rest of this arc as he goes through his trip - they have to operate on him and some other stuff happens I guess (Julie-Su gets thrown off of a roof, Knuckles fights some guys in a desert, Vector is a misogynist, stuff like that). At the end of issue 15, Charmy learns from his trip and returns to his family, temporarily leaving the Chaotix to return to his royal duties. Mello's family and his all mourn Mello's death and bury him back at their home.
So. What was the fucking point of all that
In the long-term, Charmy returning home to his family essentially writes him out of the story for a while. Knuckles the Echidna issue 15 released in 1998, and Charmy doesn't really return until 2001. While I'm not entirely sure what the reason for this was, there were so many members of the Chaotix that I honestly think this was an okay decision.
However, there's one very important question left to answer: Why was LSD and a drug overdose included in this arc at all?
When I first read this arc, I had a burning thought that I couldn't get out of my mind:
PART 1.5 - wait is this an anti-drug PSA?
(if you want to avoid me talking in-depth about the abilities of LSD and my ramble about comic PSAs for a while, you can skip to PART 2 where I continue the Charmy lore)
Comic PSAs (Public Service Announcements) and propaganda are a fundamental part of the medium’s history, whether it be to aid their country’s war efforts, give health information to their readers, or warn kids about the dangers of drug abuse. While a comic being used as a PSA isn’t inherently a bad thing, it’s usually VERY obvious. One of the most interesting ones I've found is a PSA that features Green Lantern debunking misinformation about the AIDS crisis. The image quality isn’t great, but the comic doesn’t hold back when talking about how the AIDS crisis is spreading homophobic ideology - if you read this, you know it’s a PSA and you know what message it’s trying to send. Sometimes propaganda can be subtle, but PSAs are usually loud.
(cw: homophobia)
This is why anti-drug PSAs are so common and so remembered - they’re over the top, they’re blunt (lol), and they have a very specific message they’re trying to send. For example, there’s an issue of New Teen Titans from 1983 that introduce a character called the Protector to teach kids about drug awareness where the issue literally starts with the Teen Titans in an auditorium telling kids about a dangerous drug. This issue also includes some bad trip imagery, and it’s uh… honestly i kinda love this
Anti-drug PSAs usually don’t work for this very reason - showing how a drug affects fictional characters can increase interest in the substance, and a single superhero telling someone to stop smoking is not going to break someone’s addiction.
So. Is Knuckles the Echidna issues 13-15 an anti-drug PSA?
Probably not, but if it is it’s doing a fucking terrible job of it
Some of the main factors of a PSA are the information it's presenting, the opinion it wants the consumer to develop, and the bluntness of its presentation. While this part of the Knuckles series is certainly over the top, the rest of these factors are really muddy. First, anti-drug PSAs usually don’t create a fake drug to replace the one they’re advising against. An anti-weed campaign will just tell you that weed is bad because that’s the opinion it wants you to walk away with. So when Knuckles issue 13 introduces a substance called “Lemon Sundrop Dandelion” and never actually refers to it as LSD, it’s less of a message about “drug bad” and more just a sly nudge and wink that goes “hey you see that? yeah, that’s drug.”
Then there’s the problem that there isn’t really much of a lesson to be had from these issues regarding drug use. Yes, Mello dies horrifically of an overdose, but most of the cast is able to walk off the trip like it’s nothing. Charmy needs to be operated on, but the doctors literally treat it like it’s fucking NOTHING
he's literally talking about how he told a patient that couldn't afford surgery to go to the butcher like HUH?????
In fact, Charmy’s trip seems to help him in the long run - he’s forced to face his past, and eventually returns to his family because of the literal guilt trip he has. It’s a fundamental part of his character arc.
This isn’t to say that I wish these issues were explicitly drug PSAs - I bring all of this up because these issues were released in 1998, in an era where the anti-drug movement was arguably at its peak. The people working on these comics would KNOW its content is similar to and even promotes the anti-drug movement. While I don't consider these issues to be an anti-drug PSA, they can definitely serve as anti-drug propaganda.
With this in mind, considering Knuckles the Echidna as a form of propaganda really opens up how utterly terrible these issues are. These comics can be genuinely harmful pieces of anti-drug propaganda because the way they use LSD to advance they plot is untrue to how the drug actually works and relies entirely on fear mongering. While LSD can be laced into other substances like drinks, it probably wouldn't last long in cooked meat - LSD usually degrades at higher temperatures, and telling comic readers that they need to be afraid of LSD-laced fair food is fucking stupid and likely based on false urban legends. Not only that, but Renfield T. Rodent’s plot to addict everyone to his LSD chili dogs is also fucking stupid because LSD is not considered an addictive substance. It can be extremely dangerous at high or multiple doses, but LSD does not normally lead to compulsive use.
I don’t talk about all of this to be a cinemasins guy or to nitpick a comic from 1998, and I also don't want to imply that PSAs can't spread lies and misinformation (anti-drug PSAs famously over-exaggerate things). I bring all of this up to show an ineffective and possibly dangerous use of something that could be considered anti-drug propaganda. Spreading blatantly untrue information and placing false fears into a reader’s mind is truly incompetent on the writer’s behalf, especially considering that this comic was targeted at kids. And that’s not even mentioning that there’s barely any moral to all of this. There’s no lesson and they never talk about this again.
Do I think this was all intentional on the behalf of the writers? I have no idea. I have no goddamn idea what they were thinking with this one, and I honestly don't think much thought was put into this arc at all. Maybe this was a strange attempt to make a Sonic-themed anti-drug PSA, maybe they were just inspired by the drug PSAs of their time when writing this, or maybe they just did not care. I don't know man. Anti-drug propaganda is stupid and it doesn't work and these comics drive me crazy
alright enough of that. let's talk about genocide
PART 2 - SAFFRON
don’t worry this part will be shorter (cheering and clapping)
Like I mentioned a while back, Charmy is essentially written out of the story for a while after the Mello incident. While living in the Golden Hive Colony, he reunites with another friend, Saffron Bee. Saffron becomes Charmy’s girlfriend, and they’re together for basically the rest of the comic. Usually if Charmy shows up, Saffron is there too.
(image of Charmy and Saffron I stole from... the Shipping Wiki??)
They eventually return to help Chaos Knuckles, a green version of Knuckles who is uh. Kinda going through it. Not much important Charmy lore needs to be discussed here, but some of his actions do eventually lead to him creating a genocidal villain that will cause many problems later. Don’t worry about it.
Things are quiet for a while for Charmy and Saffron. That is, until Eggman attacks their colony and wipes out most of its population.
Charmy and Saffron are the only survivors we see from the Golden Hive Colony. Eggman transforms the colony into a new base and traps its residents in an invention of his called the Egg Grapes - basically, he puts Mobians in these little pods that sap all of their life force, powering his empire. Most people do not survive the Egg Grapes.
The two bees return to join the Chaotix for a little while, and the rest of the Chaotix confirm that the Golden Hive Colony and its residents are truly gone. Espio destroys what’s left of the colony so Eggman can’t use it as a base, and no other survivors from the colony are found.
So. yeah what the fuck
Archie Sonic is known to have a LOT of characters - I’ve talked about the sheer number of echidnas the series has before, but there are a lot of characters that have massive extended families. The arc where Mello died introduced like eight new bee characters, but most of them were background characters that didn’t need to stick around.
Most people cite writer Ian Flynn’s debut to the series as when a lot of these unneeded/background characters were written out or killed off, and I agree since one of his objectives as a writer was to tighten up the story. However, the trend of “Archie background characters getting killed off or written out” started a little bit before he joined the team. There’s the destruction of the Golden Hive, and many echidnas in this arc suffer from the horrors of war - a number die off after Charmy and Saffron rejoin the Chaotix. yeah it's kinda fucked up
This is the second major arc where Charmy has lost people close to him - first Mello, and now his entire family and kingdom. The same goes for Saffron - they only have each other left. I mean the Chaotix are also there but still, trauma is trauma
How could it get any worse?
PART 3 - CHARMY
Remember how Archie Charmy is based off of the Knuckles’ Chaotix manual? The one that said he was sophisticated and 16?
This is about to cause a few problems.
At this point, it’s around 2007. The Knuckles’ Chaotix manual is terribly outdated, and most versions of Charmy within canon are 6 year-old kids. Charmy is known to be the annoying comedic relief, which is the exact opposite from how he’s portrayed in Archie Sonic.
So when SEGA asked writer Ian Flynn to change Archie Sonic to be like his video game counterpart, the solution was uh. well. it could have been handled better
Like how he obliterated the Golden Hive Colony, Eggman’s next target to destroy is Knothole, the city where Sonic and the Freedom Fighters all live. It’s a surprise to all of the residents, and he manages to teleport most of the population into his Egg Grapes. Before Sonic can save them, Eggman singles out Charmy to be used as an example of how the Egg Grapes work.
Sonic and friends manage to get Charmy out, but not before the damage is already done. In the limited amount of time the Grape sapped his life force, Charmy’s memory was partially wiped and personality changed forever. After this, Charmy has very little memory of the Golden Hive Colony at all, only seeming to remember Saffron and his friends. His becomes much more child-like, similar to his game counterpart.
the fucking sigh i just sighed
For clarification, Charmy is still 16. The only thing that was altered was his mind, with the intention to make his personality more in-line with his goofy video game counterpart. The problem is that giving a character brain damage to turn them into a comedic relief character is fucked up and unintentionally ableist.
This is something that writer Ian Flynn identified pretty early and openly regrets (I’m not sure what the source of that statement is, I’m assuming an episode of Bumblekast but I’m don’t know which one. I’ll edit this if I find it). Because of this, he mostly kept Charmy out of any comedic situations for the rest of the series. Charmy has a very limited role in the series after this until the reboot, only appearing sporadically and in one Sonic Universe arc. When he does show up, his childish demeanor is usually met with the patience of the Chaotix and their sad expressions.
Although the intention was to make Archie Charmy more like his game counterpart, in practice I honestly think this action only made Archie Charmy even MORE distant from his game character. From the Egg Grape incident to the reboot, Archie Charmy’s trauma never leaves my mind and leaves me feeling strangely hollow.
CONCLUSION - WHAT THE FUCK
I find the Archie Sonic series unfathomably fascinating. While I love the series, I can’t deny that most of the events I went over are poorly handled by the writing team and leave the series with such a strange legacy. With Archie Sonic, it’s often incredibly easy to see the biases of the writers and how they affect the characters and stories, leading to some genuinely fucked up moments that could have easily been avoided in my opinion.
Archie Charmy was really one of the characters that got it the worst, but it's honestly so strange that all of this happened to him specifically. The fact that all of this shit happens to a silly little bee is so, so Archie Sonic to me. Charmy is such a simple character to understand - he's a funny kid who's kinda annoying and hard to handle. So when I look back and see the 3,000+ words I just wrote about Archie Charmy... fucking hell why did i do that
In conclusion. I am sorry and do not become a comics person
thanks for reading if you got this far. as always let me know if i need to tag any other content warnings or if there was anything i got wrong! alright good night tristate area
#PLEASE read all of the content warnings before opening the pandora's box of charmy lore#this one's a hell of a read i am so sorry#sonic loreposting#cw drug use#cw overdose#cw child death#cw genocide#cw ableism#cw memory loss#cw age regression#i actually really enjoyed talking about comic psas and propaganda its very interesting to me#long post
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ben being the "only adult" hasn't actually mattered since the crash. it was subtle at first but then laura lee essentially tells him to shut the fuck up and the energy has a noticeable shift. there's a similar moment in 1.10 and all of that just solidifies it for ben: his "authority" means nothing out here. i do personally think some of it stems from the loss of his leg and his having to rely on the girls (i don't think any of them recognize that/outwardly think bad about him because of his disability, but it's a survival situation and it's impossible to not have that influence so much of their dynamics) but regardless, "adult" is a qualifier that's been meaningless for months now. we never really see ben have any interactions with the kids besides nat and travis (no, i will not be mentioning misty since she assaulted him, thanks!) like. he has spent his entire life being Othered. and he is still Other out here. because of his age. his gender. his disability. he is so completely and utterly alone. he is in the process of a mental breakdown. i truly don't understand how people are reading these scenes with paul as "flashbacks" or acting like they're willing at this point and not the product of his incredibly fragile mindset. paul's home was the cabin in 206. he could still hear the screaming. his mind is breaking down. no, his "gay fantasies" were not more important than shauna. it's a psychotic break. did no one see him almost pass out? (he's consistently had physical reactions to blood/injury. btw) does no one remember he didn't eat jackie, and probably hasn't eaten much since then?
does no one realize he can't exactly kneel in front of shauna and do anything meaningful because he's disabled?
but really, what can he even do? he isn't a "health teacher." i'm going to assume a lot of the people acting as if he has some kind of educational qualifications aren't american. i feel like it's pretty common in america for "health class" to be taught by a PE teacher/coach with no background in it who just plays video and reads out of a book. he doesn't have a medical history. he literally says, "i just press play on a video." no, misty and akilah aren't trained, but misty clearly paid attention in class and akilah's sister had given birth. they do know more than ben.
and no, ben didn't look at shauna and go, "that's gross." the blatant homo- (and transphobia) in acting like a gay man was just "disgusted" by childbirth is just disappointing to see.
if you really want to be upset by ben's actions, obviously, you can be. maybe he could have done more to be comforting but i just don't think he could have "saved" the baby. it was already dead. to blame him, to act like he willfully killed the baby/did not care about shauna, is just silly. to say that the disabled gay man needs to kill himself so the girls can eat him now is an insane take. to act like he needs to be punished for something out of his control is stupid. to single him out when he was far from the only one being "useless" is just weird. why is there a sudden lack of critical thought re: his character?
and can we wait to see everyone's reactions before deciding everyone hates him for it?
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The Weekly Gravy #120
The Weekly Gravy #120
Chickens in the Shadows (2010) – ***
You may have seen a video floating around the internet called “Taste the Biscuit,” in which a musical duo called Toasters ‘n’ Moose perform a song called, well, “Taste the Biscuit” in the middle of a suburban thrift store. Toasters (Estelle Piper) sings the song with a certain verve, while Moose (Tom Shaw) plinks along on his Casio keyboard with a…
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#2021 Films#2021 in Film#2022 Films#2022 in Film#Chickens in the Shadows#CW child loss#Film Reviews#The Cathedral#The Weekly Gravy#Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
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Tomorrow
@charliemwrites
I debated for some time whether or not I should post this, but in the end, my desire to share stories won.
Cw/Tw : mentions/discussion of losing faith (religious) & mentions/discussion of child death. Take care of yourselves <3
It was rare for Nélida to be uncomfortable. Sure, there were things that annoyed her, things that stressed her and things that made her afraid. She wasn’t ashamed to admit that- she was human, and it was in Men’s nature to feel, whether the emotions were positive or negative. Things that made her uncomfortable though? Things that made her skin crawl with unease and the desire to be anywhere else than where she was at the moment? Those were rare. Oh, they existed. And they made her soul tense up when mentioned.
“I don’t think that’s right, though…” Nova said, sprawled on the couch with Keegan as they argued. Nikto was sitting in a love seat, doing crosswords almost absentmindedly as he quietly listened to the sergeants talking. Castle was reading a book, not really paying attention. Meanwhile, Nélida was sitting on the ground in front of her Captain, her back leaning against his legs.
“No, I’m quite sure… It's like that thing with Adam and Eve, right? Banned from Paradise for touching the forbidden fruit or something.” Keegan replied.
“Adam and Eve were expelled from Eden to prevent them from eating from the tree of life, which would have made them eternal, not because they ate the forbidden fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil.” Nélida absently corrected, shocking the two sergeants into silence. Noting the absence of talking, she blinked and looked up, meeting the bewildered gazes of her team.
“What?” She asked, a bit confused.
“I didn’t know you knew so much about… Bible-y things.” Nova said, tilting her head in curiosity.
“Oh.. yes, I guess I just… never talked about it.” Nélida tensed slightly, her hands playing idly with Castle’s shoelaces.
“Are you Christian?” Keegan leaned forward, eager to know more about her. A small pregnant pause followed the question, broken by a shuddering breath Nélida took.
“…was.” She whispered. Nikto frowned, shuffling in his seat.
“Oh.. well, what is, or was maybe, your favorite Bible quote?” Nova frowned a little at Keegan’s question, eyes darting between his oblivious self and Nélida’s crisped expression.
Castle had put his book down, lips pursing at the tense atmosphere in the room. He let one of his big paw-like hands slowly come down to rest against Nélida’s nape, the weight reassuring.
Keegan, realizing his mistake, opened his mouth to apologize, before being cut off by the older woman.
“It..” she started, clearing her throat as her voice broke.
Nikto crouched down next to her, presenting his gloved hand, palm up, to her. Nélida took it, taking a deep breath, before starting to speak once more.
“It is… or was, perhaps, Isaiah 41:10." She admitted, clearing her throat once more.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" Keegan started, before being cut off by Nélida throwing a small smile his way.
"It's fine, amor, you didn't know."
Silence reigned for a while, before Castle hummed.
"Well now, what do you all say we play a game, hmm? Anyone up for strip poker?"
As Nova got up to go take the cards, Nélida squeezed Nikto's hand in thanks and threw a grateful glance over her shoulder at her Captain.
~~~
Nélida prefered to be the big spoon when cuddling. She just liked that position better. But sometimes, she just wanted to be held, to feel like nothing could hurt her when she was safely cocooned in her lovers' arms.
Castle rumbled quietly, scratching at Nélida's scalp gently.
"What's bothering you so much, mamí?"
"...just.. memories.." The woman mumbled, her voice slightly muffled due to the fact that her face was burried in the older man's pecs.
"Wannna talk about it?" Castle gently asked, like she was a feral animal that was being cornered.
"...Perdí a mi bebé... Mi hijo- mi hijo sólo tenía dos años y- murió..." She erupted in cries, Nélida's body was wracked with sobs, the comforting weight of Castle's hands caressing her back seemingly ineffective.
"I prayed.. I prayed so fucking much-! And my s-son, my son still.. still-!" Nélida gasped breaths in as Castle grounded her, his voice in her ear telling her to breathe helping.
"Doctors said it was CNS tumors..that there was nothing they could do, that- that it was too late.. that I noticed it too late.."
"I just- I- I miss him so much.. I wondered, why God? Why my son?" Her voice broke on the last word, trailing off into whimpers and sniffles.
Castle hummed, pressing a kiss to Nélida's forehead. He didn't quite know what to say, but he knew that what Nélida had said had probably been weighing on her for quite some time.
It took a while for Nélida to calm down, her eyes puffy and red with her anguish.
"Thank you for listening.. I-.. it's probably not fair on you, but I really needed to talk about it.."
Castle smiled sadly, a thumb drying one of his mamí's tears.
"I know this was difficult to talk about, but I'm glad you let it off your chest, love. If you ever want to talk, know that I'm here. If you don't want to talk and just want someone to hold you, I'm also here." He said, gaining himself a wobbly smile.
"Thank you, Castle... I really appreciate it."
Thye both knew she would hide anything was wrong the next morning. That she would burry her feelings deep inside her heart until they rose to the surface again. But for now, they fell asleep. Tomorrow would be different.
"...Perdí a mi bebé... Mi hijo- mi hijo sólo tenía dos años y- murió..." : “…I lost my baby… My son- my son was only two and he-.. he died…”
~~~
Isaiah 41:10
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
#writing#cod mw2#oc x oc#oc x character#Nélida ‘Mommy’ Álvarez x Castle ‘Daddy’ Alistair#Nélida ‘Mommy’ Álvarez x Nikto#Nélida Álvarez#Castle Alistair#Captain Daddy#Nélida x Castle#cw: child death#(mentioned/discussed)#cw: loss of faith#tw: child death#mentioned/discussed
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