JAY HALSTEAD + skills

Halstead brothers supporting Alvin.

Your Voight post made me think, and I think CPD doesn't get enough appreciation re: how they seem to effortlessly go against a lot of toxic masculinity. Like, there's been any issues with the guys crying or expressing their love for each other, and it's never made into a joke or followed with a no homo reaction or smthn like that and idk I guess I really appreciate the male friendships in CPD. Even the rest of the franchise doesn't do so well as this imo (not counting justice bc it's still new)

You know I started replying to this and then I realised that I’ve never really thought about the male characters in that much depth…I’m the first to sing about how amazing Erin and Burgess are, as well as male characters individually, but when I really thought about how well the men have been created, I ended up with an entire essay so apologies it’s so long but I just love this show and these guys. Also since there’s been a lot of negativity in light of *cough* recent events, I thought it would be nice to show my appreciation, so here goes. Feel free to add examples/contradictions/points/other ideas etc!!

Something I need to say before beginning: I find it really, really difficult to empathise with male characters. It’s just harder for me to really relate to their issues. And I think a huge reason for this is just that being a female character in these shows and these professions is just harder. And therefore there are a certain amount of fundamental difficulties that each female character has to face, and since being a female in general involves a lot of these struggles, it’s much easier for other women to look at these characters and see themselves in them. Look at Erin and Burgess struggling to keep their hard work and intelligence a more valuable feature to their unit than their bodies. Look at April and Maggie trying not to be undermined by their male, more qualified co-workers - and Manning being a single, working mum. Look at Gabby beating the odds and becoming a firefighter even though no one thinks she can do it because she’s small and female.

And I love that this show can do that: take these vital professions and give them amazing, well developed, multifaceted female characters whose constant struggles are so relatable for any female watching because we’ve all been there.

But what PD does that I just don’t see so much in the others (Fire does it to an extent, but I can’t really think of any examples in Med - although it’s my least favourite and so I’m probably not the best person to make analyses based on it, feel free to correct me if I’m wrong) is do the same with the males. And it’s something that I have never seen on a TV show before. There’s no “no-homo” bullshit, there’s no reservations around being friends. They hug each other when they’re worried about them, they do the friendly shoulder squeezes and arm-punches and fist-bumps. They go out for drinks together. They trust each other and look out for each other and they talk to each other about how they feel. And it’s really, really nice to see.

People go the extra mile when writing female characters (although admittedly, as a teenage girl I’m probably not using the widest sample range of TV shows) because they know that either a) their audience is mostly female, or b) they’re worried about sexist accusations. Women have always been victims of horrible media tropes, so I’m so, so glad that they do go this extra mile - I love seeing female friendships more than anything else in the world - but because people are so aware of the issue surrounding female characters, they’ve taken that into consideration, while assuming that there isn’t actually a problem with their male characters.

What Chicago PD does that I think is incredible from a characterisation point of view is they take these archetypal cop characters - the dirty cop (Voight), the by-the-book cop (Antonio), the shell-shocked veteran cop (Halstead), the old-cop young cop (Ruzek and Ollinsky) and the gentle giant (Attwater). **there are more, such as Attwater arguably being the “token minority” and Ruzek being the “fair cop” but you get the idea. They all seem to represent one of the main tropes that are almost always present in cop shows (at least all the ones I’ve watched).

And the show doesn’t subvert the tropes, not exactly - even though doing so would be so much easier - but they three-dimensialise (idk if that’s a word just roll with me here) all the characters on top of these fundamental archetypes. ie:

Voight is a dirty cop. He kills people in the name of justice, he’s used dirty money and lied under oath and done things that probably should have lost him his badge a million times. And yet, he works tirelessly for the protection of his city. He loves his son with everything he has, and his grandson, and his daughter-in-law. He took in a 13(?) year old who’d been hooked on heroin and arrested for solicitation and loves her like she’s his own daughter. He made amends with the guy who put his son in jail. He always, always fights for the underdog and doesn’t let the system take advantage of them. He treats his unit as if they are his “family” - literally his words - and he has formed relationships with every single one of them, bending the rules and putting his neck and badge on the line if they ever do anything wrong or against the rules. (Example: 3x05)

Antonio plays by the rules, that’s just who he is. He believes in the system more than Voight does, arguably because he’s always been on the right side of it. But that doesn’t mean he’s not willing to make compromises if those he really cares about are on the line - he is more than willing to turn a blind eye to other people’s ‘interpretations’ of the law, and he will do everything in his power to fight his way using the rules of the system before he breaks them. (1x02, 3x01)

Halstead’s military history I think is one of the most interesting aspects of this show because he had the potential to turn into a “cold sniper” as I think is the norm with ex-military characters, and yeah, he was affected in ways that we don’t even know - and may never fully understand - by what he saw and did in his tour(s). But he’s so selfless and sweet and supportive. His PTSD and general commitment issues mean that he can’t open up to everyone but he still lets them open up to him, being Erin’s #1 supporter, and he’s finally started to work on looking after his mental health properly and learning how to ask for help. He���s kind and caring and understands the importance of sacrifice and, like Voight, is willing to bend the rules a little bit - even if he’s always there to question Voight’s methods. (3x17, 4x18 - deleted scene)

Ruzek is the token rookie of the show, and the audience is placed in the same boat as him when initially learning the ropes of the unit and how everyone fits. He’s the young and attractive one (I mean….), and he does exhibit those typical rookie traits: he’s rash and reckless and cocky and definitely not as cynical as any of the others, but at the same time he has a huge heart, he’s sweet and caring, and he can be as tough as hell when someone he loves is in danger. He doesn’t have the “tortured romantic” side to him and he has a typical cop family tree, but he’s the person I feel like most people can probably relate to - someone who puts themselves in harm’s way every single day for no reason other than he wants to make a difference. (1x01, 1x11)

Ollinsky is the other dirty cop, although he functions more as an assistant to the dirty cop. He has the tough coldness about him that you would probably expect Jay to have instead, if following these tropes by the book, and he comes across as very sinister and quite scary. And yet he is an absolute darling around Lexi and Michelle and when Lexi died and Meredith was kidnapped, he totally lost control. Despite all the coldness and being closed-off he is perhaps the most emotional of them all, grieving and crying and not caring about how tough he is when someone he loves is threatened. (4x16)

Attwater is the gentle giant of the show and although this doesn’t need much more explaining, he, alongside Erin, is also the token minority of the unit (even more so now that Antonio’s left and Burgess has joined Erin in Intelligence) and although this trope is constantly seen as a bad thing, using a token character to avoid criticism of being racist in casting choices, in PD Attwater opens the door to addressing cases of police racism, corruption and brutality against ethnic minorities, and the episodes in which they do deal with this, Attwater is quick to express his opinion on the matter and challenge within seconds everything that’s wrong with the institution and their society. But on top of all that, he has relatives in prison, he’s expected to be a big tough “scary black man”, but in actuality he looks after his two younger siblings and does stand-up comedy and probably gives the best bear hugs ever.

And the support system that these six men have together (or five, now that Antonio’s left) is incredible to watch. They understand barriers, they know when to push and when to give each other space, they all work together so well in such a potentially toxic environment without even a hint at this hyper-masculinity that is so huge in other cop shows. They’re all just bros.

What’s also great is that even though there’s a lil bit of that bro-masculine culture especially when Erin goes undercover and dresses up all nice, they’re never anything but perfect gentlemen. There’s no teasing and no sexist remarks about her legs or whatever, they all just seem genuinely impressed by how pretty she looks and how well she does her job. Adam even says things like “there’s about a thousand things I could say right now but won’t” because they all respect Erin and Burgess and support them as much as each they do each other. They don’t care if the women do better jobs than them, or save them, or shoot more accurately than them, and they’d never dream of undermining their femininity while doing so.

Other examples of the bros being bros:

Antonio getting Jay into the unit in the first place as a thank you for helping out Gabby (Chicago Fire, season 2 sometime, mentioned later when Antonio leaves)

Voight literally crying on Alvin’s shoulder after Justin’s death

Every single one of Jay and Mouse’s interactions, especially when they talk about their time in the military and Jay realises how much he cares about his friend when Mouse wants to re-enlist and when Mouse is taken hostage (4x05, 3x03)

Antonio and Voight’s entire friendship and the fact that Voight would go to such measures to help Diego even after Antonio was the one to put the cuffs on and send him to jail

Attwater and Ruzek being bros until the end and *sniff* the whole best man thing 

They all buy Antonio a zimmer frame when he gets shot isn’t that just beautiful

Ruzek hugging Al after Lexi’s death and his little “I don’t know what to say” and “can I hug you?” - like he knows Al might just want space but he has to let him know he’s there for him

They all get so upset when Jay is taken. Just watch the scene where they see the video of his torture and their faces break me. They can’t handle the idea that someone so close to them - their brother - is in so much pain. (3x01)

Seriously tho just look at these bros

So I was just gonna write a few paragraphs and sorry this is so long but feel free to add more!! I want to know what everyone else thinks!

GONE - an epilogue to CPD 4x16

It felt like a punch to the gut. The impact of Hank's words causing her to lean forward and clench the edge of her desk to steady herself. Everything blurred temporarily but she anchored herself to the cool wood and steel surface and took a slow breath. Pushing the wave of pain down the best she could Erin focused on Kim, her shaky voice updating them on the case. The bullpen suddenly felt too hot, too small and too full of emotion. The air was thick and heavy and she struggled to keep her breathing even. Erin welcomed the escape offered when Hank sent her and Jay out. But steps from gaining her reprise from the grief and shock into denial her feet stopped, eyes falling on the board of injured victims. Lexie's sweet face called to her. She reached up, gently pulling the picture into her hands. This was all that was left now. Pictures, memories. Nineteen precious years. Too few. Lexie's eyes glimmered up at Erin, her smile genuine. Carefully Erin placed Lexie picture on the other board, offering up a silent homage for the beautiful girl. / They'd stopped by Al's house on the way home that night. Jay had shifted uncomfortable in his seat when Erin asked him to swing by but he hadn't protested out loud. She knew his emotions made him uncomfortable but it wouldn't be right if Erin didn't stop and check in on Meredith, the woman she'd considered her aunt since she was fifteen. Erin knocked softly before letting herself and Jay in the kitchen door. As she suspected Meredith was seated at the kitchen table with her sister and another close girlfriend. When her eyes met Erin's they began to water. "Oh, Erin, honey," she sobbed, rising to her feet and stepping into Erin's outstretched arms. "I'm so sorry," Erin whispered with a choked voice. She held the older woman, absorbing as much of her grief as she could relieve her of, at least temporarily, Meredith's sobs shaking both of them. Erin clenched her teeth holding in as much of her own grief as she could. She was here to try and offer some comfort and support, there would be time for her own selfish pain later but right now she had to help this mother find a way to keep breathing through her heartache. Still she couldn't keep it all in, some silent tears tracking down her cheeks. She tried to blink them away when Al walked in the room. The quiet confident man looked beaten and somehow a million years older tonight. Jay approached him with his hand extended and the two men hugged while clasping hands, Jay's awkward words of condolence and Al's dejected offer of appreciation muffling each other. "What can I do? What do you need?" Erin asked Al over Meredith's shoulder. He shook his head. What could anyone do really? There was nothing that would bring her back or make loosing her any less excruciating. Erin's need to fix this somehow, to some how make some sense of this and restore some control to her spiralling world went without remedy. Meredith began to take shaky gulps as she composed herself and lifted her head. "I'm sorry sweetie," she offered, embarrassed at her emotional display. "No, it's why I came," Erin reassured her. "Whatever you need," Erin began again. Meredith squeezed her hands. "She adored you, looked up to you and you always watched out for her. Thank you for that," she said cupping Erin's cheek. Erin's throats closed with the grief that wouldn't release making it difficult to swallow. She didn't need thanking. Didn't want it. She wanted Lexie here, she wanted her family to stop loosing its best parts, wanted to stop burying the people Hank had thrust into her life when he brought her home the night she begged him to help her get out. Nights like tonight she wished she'd never experienced what family was, what real love felt like. She wished she could return to the emptiness and numbness she drowned herself in daily before Hank saved her. She silently cursed Hank. He'd done this. He'd taught her to feel, to care. He'd made her want to be a part of something bigger than herself. And where had it got her? What had it given her but loss and regret and pain. Stop it. This isn't about you, she berated herself, pulling her thoughts back from their irrational spiral. A chill ran up her spine at how much like her mother her internal dialogue sounded. She pushed the thought away and focused back on Meredith. Meredith pulled Erin down to sit at the table and, despite Erin's polite refusal, busied herself making Erin a cup of tea. The habitual hospitality seemed to give Meredith some relief from her grief if only momentarily so Erin took the cup and sipped the luke warm liquid, doing her part to help the illusion of normality. Jay and Al had disappeared moments ago, no doubt to the garage for a stiff drink and some awkward silence that she knew Al was much more comfortable in then trying to comfort the mother of his dead child. Because how did you do that? What peace could he offer her? Her grief only served to amplify his own while reminding him just how powerless he was to protect and comfort those he loved. An hour later Jay and Erin quietly exited, assuring both Meredith and Al that they, that the whole team in fact, was here to support them with whatever they needed. They shuffled into their apartment in silence. Erin shed her coat and boots absentmindedly and followed Jay down the hall. He turned into the kitchen and grabbed two beers out of the fridge, offering one up to her. Erin hesitated. God how nice it would be to numb herself from all of this. But Erin shook her head no. She couldn't drink. Not tonight. Grief and alcohol were a toxic mix for her. If she ran from this tonight she wasn't sure she would be able to resist running again tomorrow and the next day and the next. She could feel the dark hole rising up for her. She took a step back from it and the beer in Jay's hand. She would not let her mother's voice win. Not tonight. "I'm gonna go change," she mumbled tiredly, turning towards the bedroom. Jays shoulders slumped at her retreat. He'd been surprised but not disappointed she'd refused the alcohol balm. Jay twisted the cap off his bottle, tossed it in the sink and took a long gulp of cold liquid. He welcomed the burning down his throat as he leaned back against the counter, not missing the irony in his drinking instead of Erin. He stood staring at a spot on the opposite wall until Erin emerged from their bedroom clad in her warmest comfy pyjamas. Jay put down his now empty beer bottle, pushed off the counter and met her in front of the couch. She smiled up at him as he reached out to stroke her arm. "Can I get you anything? You feel like eating something yet?" Jay offered. Erin shook her head. "Only thing I need is my boyfriend's arms wrapped round me," she offered with shy honesty. The raw venerability in her statement disarmed Jay and he pulled her close, snuggling her head under his chin for a moment before pulling her down next to him on the couch and covering them with a blanket. Erin cocooned into his side and they sat in the semi dark silence for awhile, processing the last couple of days. "I use to babysit her," Erin offered after awhile. Jay tilted his head down to look at her while she spoke. "Al, Meredith, Hank and Camille they'd go out about once a month or so you know. And I'd watch them, Justin and Lexie, well, after Hank trusted I had my shit together. She loved it when I'd turn the music up loud, we'd dance around all crazy, laughing. She had the best laugh." Erin smiled sadly, the tears returning to fill her eyes. Then a laugh tumbled out of her involuntarily. "Justin," she said through sad strangled giggles. "He was such a little shit. He'd tease her so bad. Chase her all over the house chanting stupid rhymes about her name. I swear I wanted to tie him to a chair and duct tape his mouth shut some days." Her expression changed and sadness clouded her eyes again. "And now they're both gone," she whispered. She couldn't get her head to except this. She still expected Justin to turn up unannounced with his cocky smirk any day now. It didn't matter that she's stood at Hank's side and watch them lower his body into the ground. It didn't matter that she'd kissed his forehead and said good bye while he lay in the hospital, nothing but machines keeping him alive. An imagine of Al and Meredith sitting with Lexie when they disconnected her machines overwhelmed Erin. Soon she'd be watching them lower another member of her family into the ground. She had no idea how either of them was still upright. Erin shook her head trying to rid herself of the grief swelling up, threatening to consume her. Jay rubbed soft circles on her back. "It's okay Erin. You don't have to hold it in it right now," he encouraged her gently. But the dam wasn't ready to break, not just yet. There was one more person she needed to care for tonight. "How are you doing, you've been so quiet," she asked, placing her hand on his chest. Jay kissed the top of her head. How was he? He didn't know how to answer that but he knew his girl. She wouldn't give in to her own feelings until she'd cared for everyone else. He was upset of course, how could he not be? Lexie was a sweet girl and part of their family. Her death and the death of all those other kids was completely senseless. He respected and admired Al and had learned a lot from the man these past four years. Jay felt helpless to ease some of Al's pain. He didn't know what to say or do. Jay felt his heart being ripped out of his chest when Al asked him to thank Will. Thank him. How was Al so calm, so appreciative? If it had been Jay he'd probably want to lash out at Will for not being God and saving his daughter. He'd been slightly in awe of Al. Going to Al's house had been so difficult for Jay. It reminded him of visiting the wives of soldiers he'd lost but so much worse. Seeing Meredith grieve for her child was the kind of gut wrenching image he was sure a whole bottle of whisky couldn't erase from his head. He'd wanted to protest going but he knew it's what Erin needed and no way in hell was he not going to be there for her. Al had quietly ushered Jay to the garage and his relief at escaping the house was short lived when heavy silence fell between the men. Jay again felt helpless, having no idea how to convey his sympathy or say or do anything useful. It was once again Al who broke the silence. "Make sure the people you love know you love them," Al had said gruffly staring off across the room. "Because you just never know," he'd trailed off, throwing his whiskey back in one gulp. They made eye contact briefly and Jay nodded, words still not co operating with him. "Jay?" Erin asked lifting herself up to look at him. Jay shook himself out of his thoughts remembering Erin was waiting on him for an answer. "I'm okay, same as everyone I guess. Just wishing I could bring her back for them and you," he stroked her hair. His girl had been through so much the last months. Loosing Justin, the fallout of that affecting her relationship with Hank, her mother's cruel paternity scheme and now Lexie. "Mostly I'm worried about you," he admitted. "I know. I'm sorry for that, sorry for all the drama all the time," her voice laced with regret and exhaustion. "Don't be. I'm where I want to be," he said confidently. "Me too," her smile was tempered by the weight of the day's events but Jay knew she was telling the truth. She hadn't pulled from him like she used to when things got to much for her. That simple fact spoke volumes about where her head was at and where he stood in her life. It wasn't hard to be here for her when she willingly came to him. She snuggled back into him and they settled back into silence. Her tears didn't seem to want to come tonight but that was okay. They would eventually and Jay would wipe them away when they did. https://www.fanfiction.net/~justkillingtimewhileiwait http://archiveofourown.org/works/10066682

interesting that cpd is gonna go from 4x16 straight to 4x18 hmm

HALSTEAD BROTHERS

Jay is still driving 👏🏻👏🏻

“Jay, are you there?”