#couldn't see a damn thing
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FINALLY GOD DAMN
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The woman's voice in earbuds: Battery Low
Arthur: So you're just going to leave me. Just like everyone else
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp arthur#ikevamp incorrect quotes#im going to preface this one by saying#1. i'm so sorry#2. I am also not remotely sorry#these two things can be true at once and are not remotely in conflict with each other <3#in all seriousness though i saw this post days ago and i just couldn't stop relating it to him#he's so damn dramatic and desperate for attn PLS#i also just can't get over the thought of him muttering this while everyone looks at him like he's nuts#theo like 'im not touching that with a forty foot pole'#theo: yeah just like i'm doing right now **goes to work**#man the way i just imagine dazai holding a hose over arthur to make it look like its raining until the camera panels back#isaac walking out of sbux with everyone's coffee like 'wtf happened here???'#shhhhh isaac no questions only caffeine#source: foodandfriends#(yes i am aware of the tragic meaning this can take on no i will not be broaching it)#(I Do Not See It. Let the Children Sleep.)
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#bonus under the cut where i got their hat in the shot too bc i couldn't decide which was better#cacturne#grass/dark‚ huh? meowscarada typing. i think it's cool—i wonder if this guy is a phys. attacker like meowscarada is. i would guess so#also hold on i just realized i was totally wrong about cacnea being a rock-type i dunno WHERE i got that from i'm gonna go back and fix that#okay hi i'm back. from the cacnea post. lemme look at this thing's stats and see if they're on par with meowscarada#damn ok phys atk and sp atk are PERFECTLY tied i guess#and they're both higher than meowscarada's phys atk. is this like a Good pokémon?? hold on lemme check its tier on smogon#okay in gen 9 it's NU (but apparently very good for NU) and meowscarada is OU. i don't understand the competitive pokémon landscape
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I am going to slap you myself
#WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS#the conversation is flying over both their heads because they are saying entirely different things#wwx: it was such a huge blow to me. Losing my golden core was the stuff of nightmares. I do not want to recall that. I want to move on#what jc hears: Get Lost shidi. I no longer want to see your face#jc: I want to hate you so bad. Why can't I hate you? Haven't you broken my heart enough? Why couldn't you just TELL me anything? Why.#what wwx hears: JC can't deal with the fact that I wwx who did everything terrible am actually responsible for his achievements. His pride#took a huge blow. Damn. Better tell him that I don't actually mind lmao#[grimly said while looking at the wwx papercraft I have hanging on my bedroom wall.]#[actually what many do miss is that deep down there are multiple times WWX actually does understand JC's thing. He understands the pride as#a cultivator. He understands how horrifying the self sacrifice must have been (see: wq and wn). He just doesn't like thinking about it for#very long in this life. Sigh]#mdzs#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#mo dao zu shi#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#kk's rambles tag
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Sowing seeds of discontent and disharmony by hanging up on my parents birthday phone call the second my mom asked if I gained weight. Hope that sits badly on their minds while they think about how that's the first call I've engaged with them in 2 months and it was for the dogs birthday. Dad scrambling to text me for my mom that she didn't mean it. Like fuck I told her I've been having a rough month and day. She couldn't keep it to herself that badly. Fucks sake
#was already not in a great place mentally but i entertained the call and was actually feeling okay talking to them giving them an update#she just hits me with that. and I'm not normally sensitive about my weight even when my mom harped on me for gaining some a few years back#i genuinely normally don't care bc I'm happy with myself. but i know ive lost weight because I've been on icu and we don't have time to eat#im so fucking mad and im even more mad I'm crying about it#bc what the fuck#i was actually feeling like momentarily safe talking to them and being vulnerable about working on my next life stages#and she just ruined the call. i wanted to talk to my mom and dad more. i do miss talking to them about some things.#i was happy to get to see my family all together even if it was for the dogs birthday. and people were smiling and shit#and ik theyre gonna say i ruined it by being sensitive but jfc#it was literally the 2nd thing my mom said to me on the call after we sang happy birthday#why couldn't she just shut up. why couldn't she have said anything else. why did i let it bother me so much i hung up#I'm just fucking tired and sad and now feeling even lonlier than ever#i just wanted a nice moment with my family god fucking damn is that too hard to ask for#and im even more angry and sad now that i cant call them back bc my mom will get on me about smth else we were previously talking about#that phone call was supposed to be a neutral zone just for the birthday song. and i was going to ride it out but fucking hell#why didnt i just put up with it so i could have talked to my family#and no calling them back isnt an option. they haven't apologized and it would be an un neutral call#which gives them space to harass me about work and shit
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during its apartheid years, south africa had one of the strictest media controls in the world. this extended into homes when television was introduced in the country in 1977 (which the government had delayed until that year due to fears of "undue influence"), and when home video came along with it. each videotape that was legally distributed during these years was required to have a notice in the official languages of english and afrikaans that it complied with media censorship laws codified years prior.
(the model for the certificate was likely influenced by the british board of film classification's. by the beginning of the 20th century, the british had brought the template with them to south africa and other former colonies such as india. south africa was probably the only country to use it on home releases.)
this meant that south africans who watched "legal" videotaped movies not only had to sit through commercials and a standard-issue anti-piracy warning, but a federal confirmation that the film didn't feature an interracial couple, among many other things. the total time for the two warnings could reach up to two minutes long - for comparison, the chorus of "oops i did it again" by britney spears is twenty seconds long - but some were rushed through.
this example was taken from a tape of disney's snow white and the seven dwarfs published in 1994, the year apartheid ended. the media censorship laws which required the certificate would be overhauled two years later, though video openings remained similar for a while after.
#south africa#info#obviously there were ''illegal'' tapes smuggled in like in every other country w/ similar laws#i also added the model thing bc many people (particularly mericans like myself) aren't used to seeing whole ass Certificates at the#beginning of movies. that being said it was a theatres thing and not a home releases thing in the uk india etc#the mpaa ratings bumpers were always a lot more sparse and less official-looking#absolutely nothing to do with architecture but it fit more here than on my main. vhs history etc#and yeah. break. uh. idk#btw the /sraeli government did the exact same thing w/ television and ended up caving in '67#(not /as/ late but still pretty damn late)#the year being significant had nothing to do w/ it#it was because the general population were getting televisions so they could tune into broadcasts in neighboring countries#(palestine is small so not too hard)#and they c-couldn't have people watching ARAB TELEVISION!!!! THE HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!
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I survived the Total Solar Eclipse 2024!!
#wolf did a bad thing#but not bad#solar eclipse#solar eclipse 2024#couldn't see anything :(#too damn cloudy
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Good evening, once again I’m baffled that blogs exist in the Tumb.lr RPC that won’t interact w blogs just bc their pictures aren’t pretty enough for them.
#𝙷𝙾𝙻𝙳 𝙾𝙽 - 𝙿𝙾𝙿𝚂 𝙸𝚂 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙰 𝚃𝙷𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷𝚃. (OOC)#sigh.png#this is your regular PSA that this community is full of BRILLIANT WRITERS and blog aesthetic really doesn't matter#to those who make their own graphics? I see u#to those who commission them? I also see u#to those who really couldn't give a damn about either? guess what I see u as well#you're all amazing and you all deserve a place here#and never let anyone try to convince you otherwise#anyway happy palentine's day imma be here for a bit getting to things
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Poor Hector is not at all feeling optimistic at present, and I don't really blame him. The zaith'isk ordeal really did a number on him and he's completely unsure what the right and wrong actions are here, or who is a friend and who is an enemy.
The deep recesses of the monastery here appear to have been dug out of a sort of cave or canyon area. (Odd choice for a monastery devoted to the god of dawn.) It's full of bats and (I assume) bat dung and just generally very ominous-feeling.
And there he is, the man himself:
Sir, your office looks fuckin' awful.
Honestly surprised he didn't oust Therezzyn out of her office rather than take this super cracked-up area.
"Ahhh...our esteemed guest," he says as Hector approaches. The door behind them clangs shut with a heavy, uncomfortably final sort of noise. "Please approach. We have much to discuss."
The gith inquisitor has a surprisingly gentle voice and looks them over appraisingly as they move into the room.
"My ardents spoke of one of our kin that escaped a crashing ghaik slave-vessel."
"Ch'r'ai," Lae'zel says reverently. "Vlaakith's justice in flesh."
The man's sharp features twist in a slow smile. "You have accomplished much, child. I am pleased to finally meet you." His gaze shifts to Hector, and the warmth falls away, replaced by a piercing intensity. "I hear there is so much goblin blood on your hands that it soaks their children's nightmares."
It is not a description that brings Hector any pleasure. He frowns, flinches back slightly, and the inquisitor smirks tightly, knowingly. "To business. I suspect you plucked something precious from the ghaik ship. Something that belongs to us." The smile fades, replaced by a firm authority that expects no disobedience. "The weapon. Give it to me."
"Don't do it..." wails the dream guardian in Hector's mind. "The weapon is how I protect you!"
"Do it," Lae'zel insists in counterpoint. "Do not disobey the inquisitor."
Hector hesitates, puts his hand on the artifact in his pack...then pauses, and tries a different kind of truth. "I can't," he says honestly. "It protects me."
He has gone along with everything thus far because he hopes... desperately... that Lae'zel could be right. That the gith purify their infected. That those who have already responded otherwise were part of some conspiracy. That this man is their ally.
And if all those things are true, telling him of the artifact's power over their safety is not only valid but necessary.
And if they aren't...
The inquisitor's expression goes hard. "Indeed? And what does it protect you from?"
"The voice of the Absolute," Hector says. Honest. Steady. Direct...
And his worst fears are confirmed. All around him, the guards in the room draw their crossbows and sight down on the group, and W'wargaz draws the enormous greatsword from his back with a single, lithe movement.
"If you hear that voice at all, you are infected," the inquisitor snarls. Any pretense of welcome or good humor has vanished. "And it is my people who need protecting from you! Hta'zith!"
Shit.
#bjk plays baldur's gate 3#hector carlisle#damn#i went around and around on this for a little while#and this was the only line that really made sense for hector#he is trying so hard to follow lae'zel's guidance in this place#but she and therefore he are acting on wrong information#i think this is cutting off a potential questline#but i just couldn't make it work mentally for me anymore#for this char#to keep handing the thing over in the face of the guardian's objections AND the mounting evidence that there is no safety here#this has been a weird little wriggly bit of back-and-forth character progression and i'm not sure i love how it turned out#but we move on and see where it goes from here i guess
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Every time I see someone use Purple Haze Feedback for 'UwU FuGio real!!' or paint Giorno as a coldhearted sadistic master manipulator I feel myself coming closer and closer to snapping
#theskinwalkerqueenspeaks#granted i don't like fugio#i don't see a problem with the ship it's just not my personal otp#hell sometimes i see really good fugio art or fic stuff and i go 'y'know what fuck yeah that slaps'!!! i'm not a fugio hater#but the entire point of purple haze feedback was not to be endgame ship material#i'm also not saying that you couldn't use that to back up your ship but if that is the only thing you got out of it you should take a step#back from fandom and shipping culture bc you should be able to interact with a piece of media without thinking 'how can i ship this'#also giorno is a deeply traumatized teenager he ain't manipulating the mafia that easily lmfao#that one goes out to the crowd who think that giorno only told bruno what he wanted to hear#which is bullshit in itself because he hadn't even heard of bruno prior how the hell would he pull 'oh yeah same i hate drugs too'#out of his ass without knowing bruno and without bruno ever saying that he hated passione's involvement in the drug trade#it's a huge leap#also!!#giorno went out of his way more than once to try to keep his team alive and at the cost of not achieving his dream at that#those are not the actions of someone who doesn't care who lives or dies as long as his goals are met#you all need to rewatch the series and reassess how you see characters because holy fuck you missed so many gods damn points#rant over
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@ardenssolis said ; "So, Jason, was the voyage worth it in the end?" [hi smol] / 𝐔𝐍𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐃
❝ Was that voyage worth it? Let me put it this way; would you give everything in your life for one second of glory ? for not even a tangible future, just for one beautiful dream ? everything you have ? I did. That voyage... See it under any lens, you don't need to be a genius to come to the conclusion that it was not worth it. Did it make me learn anything? Hell, did that even matter ? To who was I even supposed to show my change of heart ? Was I even conscious of that ? Did I return as the same man I was when I left or was I so blind that I could not even tell any difference ? Before I could mourn this wreckage of a dream and gulp down my own despair, I was crushed by the very same ship that allowed this feverish dream to sail. The dead can't learn from their mistakes, I can only say I would do it again differently now because I now have a second chance to make things different. ❞
#ardenssolis#;j.ason#/HI SHIIIII!#/UMMM;; i think;; its such a tragedy how the story ends; but its those stories that leave the -reader- thinking#bc j.ason didn't really have that second chance to look back ; he couldn't- and thats one of the interesting things#his story was a feverish dream of glory; he was so blinded by it that he could not see all it took to get to the end#he didnt get a second chance; but he also didnt stop to give himself that second chance u get me?#he was so blinded by the shine of it all that everything slipped past him#theres no learning for him until its too late and he gets crushed by the very same (now rotting) argo#and thats like;; the tragedy of it all? bc the voyage doesnt make him a better person#voyages always change a person in one way or another but he doesnt look back on this#compared to other heroes that come back with more wisdom like g.ilgamesh and that become better#in his case it feels so;; humane?? he sucked ass and he still sucks ass!#and he ends as a looser!! completely unhappy and miserable!#heck even f.ate wise; u look at his lvl10 bond ce#'Next time; there won't be a next time huh. Give me another chance!'#'Next time I'll properly; seriously; carefully; correctly... Do it; I'll show you! ... ... Damn...'#theres no other chance because he ends up dying there;; do u get the tragedy-#now he can grow because he can finally face back his past; but at his time of death#it was only at the very last moment that the lament truly hit#j.ason didn't die at peace nor filled with rage; he died with lament and despair which to him is worst#he doesnt lament chasing for his dream; he would do it again; that's not the point but the way he did it- he wants another chance!#HE'LL DO IT DIFFERENTLY THIS TIME...!! (this time he'll learn!)#the hero always gains something after the journey but#j.ason didnt gain anything; in fact he LOST things
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gods, why didn't i get a college degree in anything useful?
#i've known since the day it unceremoniously came in the mail that my degree is worth less than the paper it's printed on#yeah i needed to college experience for social and lersonal growth#but why couldn't i have gotten something out of it that can help me find a damn job?#what was the fucking point of going through all that?#(the social and personal growth obviously)#ahgggggg#i'm too broke and disabled to go back to school NOW#(the way i'm coping with the anxiety of waiting to hear back about the internal job i just interviewed for#is to have Officially Decided That I'll Be Rejected Out Of Hand. So What Do I Do Next?#it hurts but at least i can move forward if the worst come to pass#and it gives me something to do while i'm Waiting#ughhhhh#why couldn't i have sold my damn soul and gotten the shitty computer science degree my school had??#i remember visiting a house a friend was pet-sitting for and seeing the couple's gaming setup#and just seeing dollar signs. they both worked in computer science and made $$$#but at the time it sounded like the worst thing in the world#and i'd already changed my major once... loved what i was studying... and had my dad breathing down my neck about how much my education cost#i'm so lucky i don't have debt. thanks to my grampa. but holy hell did my dad lord that inheritance over me and make me dance for it#i don't think he ever got over grampa pulling *his* college funding bc he spent college fucking around and dropped out#couldn't wrap his head around that the narrow thing he'd trained me to be would never follow in his 'rebelious' footsteps#i beat myself up over A-'s there was no way i'd do anything other than take my grades seriously#but that was the problem. i was worried about grades and what sounded bearable to learn. not what was realistic to do with it#i wanted to get a fucking phd! with what fucking money!!!!#of course not that i had the support or the maturity to understand what it meant to choose an education that could grant me a career#but who can i blame if not myself?#dad always said i had to Go To College. there was no choice in not going. but as soon as college came he shoved me out the door#and slammed shut. how was i supposed to know what to do without him there to make me do things all of a sudden?#that took nearly a decade to learn dammit#personal
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You know reading vol 5 of mdzs before all the rest (don't ask me why I'm a clown and there were Circumstances) has to be the craziest experience of my life. Because it took all of ten minutes of wwx talking to literally hit me so hard in the gut I had to sit down and listen to really loud music for a while to calm down.
Who needs therapy when mxtx is alive and writing, I guess????? 🤡
Can't wait to get to the actual tragic parts I just know I'm gonna be that "help" frog phone meme
#mdzs#i was really out here thinking svsss would be my fave bc of lbh#and then i finally get around to reading mdzs and it blows my expectations out of the fucking water holy actual shit#and i just had this feeling the first time i read parts of it like 'oh. this series is going to kill me. im not coming back from this.'#and here i am booboo the fool getting my clown ass make-up on#idk how to explain it like i just fucking LOVE mxtx's takes on arrogance#that wwx is constantly being perceived as a show off and an incorrigible flirt and a know it all#how wwx cant always help the ways he acts out the desperation that has embedded itself into his very bones#how wwx only ever wanted to do the right thing and that having been so much of his downfall#how his worth and talent would always be eclipsed by virtue of his circumstances#how he's above needing recognition at his core but at the same time longs for an ounce of good will and positive recognition ->#how human he is despite his brilliance. how he never gets it no matter how hard he tries to be worthy.#like to me wwx is emblematic of what it means to be poor/an immigrant in high places#always villified always alien always wrong always unwelcome#no matter how clever or capable or kind youll always be an eyesore because you don't 'act right'. not 'one of them.' you never will be.#i just...the way he just wanted it all to be over by the end. the way he didnt even want to come back to life. that he was sick of it all.#im rattling the bars of my cage i love him I LOVE HIM i love him#i understand you lan wangji (and i love lwj too)#and even lan wangji too like. the way so many of their issues in the beginning stems from that self-same problem#how lwj couldn't live with his out of control feelings how he too couldn't quite lay down his pride#how lwj was also trapped by the expectations of his clan in his own way how so much of their separation was a form of penance#that the calamity of wwx's loss forced him to reconsider everything he thought he knew about himself and his life#how he was left with nothing but regret. how when wwx returns--lwj refuses to leave anything to chance this time#he refuses to let wwx be alone anymore--refuses to let him hurt himself for the sake of others refuses to just let it all happen#even if it means overstepping a boundary or propriety it doesn't matter--as long as wwx stays with him. pride be damned#god i just can't i just can't do it im biting im ripping things apart GOD#will also say the jokes about lwj being like. 'strict moral compass or BUST.' and then wwx literally committing like 17 felonies in the bg#while lwj is like 'crimes? what crimes. nothing to see here.' NEVER stops being funny. like i was pissing myself laughing#i know its a known trope but by god are they hilarious about it#also. lan qiren how many times do your nephews have to go catatonic for you to stop with the catholic guilt and repression
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found out that rascal's owner took him again while i was out, and he's probably not gonna be back since the semester's almost over. i don't even know if his owner's coming back next semester, if i'll ever see him again. if he'll ever see me again. why do they wait until im not around to do this? why do they never let me say goodbye to him?
#i didnt really get to process it bc i found out when i was hanging w a friend but. im processing it now#sigh.. i dont know. i dont know.#at the end of the day he is and has always been someone else's cat. i can't control what she does with him#no matter what i think of it. she can always take him away. but every time it happens im just. im tired yknow?#it's worth it to me to have him around. i love him dearly and i want him to be in a home where he's actually cared for (which i have done my#best to provide) but he's just. not mine. and every time it happens i back up and think man. im such a sucker.#i don't think people manipulate me often. not in an ongoing way i mean. i don't think ppl see me as valuable enough to most of the time.#but damn. she really found my weak spots didn't she. free petcare courtesy of one chump who can't live without animals around. sigh#he deserves stability but he deserves love more. this weird shared custody thing is better for him i think. and frankly i also love him.#im not the priority here but my feelings are like. there. him being taken away without even telling me first hurts. i'd like to be able to#say goodbye to him. im not saying he has to stay or this has to go on but couldn't they just.. consider my feelings a bit more?#just bc you're fine with dropping your cat off somewhere for weeks not knowing when you'll see him again and not visiting doesn't mean i am#and i kind of feel like my roommate is part of this. after all it's not like his owner can just break into our room and take him#and if im always out when they do it there's a chance roomie's just shipping him off whenever she gets sick of him.#she's done it before. even after she agreed so vehemently with me about never wanting him to go back to such treatment and stuff early on.#she's been spraying him for little reason lately too. and i mean i get being a little more cautious with some things bc her neck's broken#but she's really fixated on how much he smells and bites and stuff and talks about how if i wasn't around she'd consider eating him#and then other times she's like that's my pookie. i don't get it. like yeah i tell rascal to fuck off sometimes bc he hurts me but it's not#like a hateful thing. i dont resent him for it i'm just annoyed sometimes bc he's maiming me a little. he's my baby. how could i loathe him?#so it makes me think that roomie might be blaming his transfers on his owner bc she doesn't want me to judge her#and like. this is her room too. it's not her fault she's more bothered by the smell than me. if she doesn't want to be bitten and clawed all#the time i can sympathize. i don't wanna force her to house him. but i wish she'd just be honest with me i guess#like. what if his owner decides to give him away without telling me? i'd take him in in a heartbeat. even though i know it's a bad idea.#but i'm worried he'll fall out of my reach completely. and at the very least I'd like to be able to say goodbye first. that's all.
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are we gonna talk about how Ascended!Astarian sounds like Cazador? like literally the speech patterns and the tone
#damn neil's good at his job#i ascended astarion to see what would happen then reloaded the morning after#b/c i'd played through the cazador dialogue scenes a few times before that to see all the options#and i just couldn't listen to their vocal similarities#(and frankly AA is a bit of a dick)#not to make him a hero not to make him a villain but to prioritize a third thing (the less-insufferable of the two options to hang out with
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hold on everyone shut up im getting super emotional about jonathan sims
#tma#kara stop blogging#thinking about the web. thinking about how it was his first mark#and how that mark how that unaddressed trauma so deeply affected him.#and how befitting that is for the web too- to tie someone up its strands for YEARS#thinkin about how almost every single decision that man makes is made out of fear#that motherfucker has never felt safe in his god damn life you can tell and im EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT#thinking about how so much of his fear response is CONTROL because of it. His ridiculous skepticism was him trying to control it#if he denies it if he refuses to believe in it it cant hurt him#about his paranoia and desperation for knowledge is so rooted in that fear of losing control#about his entire s4 arc and grappling with becoming inhuman. about not feeling like he has any kind of personal autonomy#and how so often thats written off as him making excuses (and dont get me wrong- he makes excuses too. im not saying he doesnt) but also-#like you look at what happened with his first leitner and its like. he couldnt move. couldnt do anything to escape#and then when the other boy got taken he couldnt do anything to save him either#of course he feels like hes never had any control#of course hes desperate for knowledge- if he had only *known* what couldve happened then he couldve prevented it.#the survivors guilt is so deeply part of his character#and thats what makes jonah targeting him so fucking insidious and scary#he took his man who is already so terrified- put him in a situation where he was so out of his depth#knowing that his fear response would be to desperately try and figure out what was happening- to keep asking questions--#pulling himself deeper into the eyes influence and easily turning it around and making it Jon's fault#as if Jon isn't trapped like everyone else- it's just his fear response is so fucking perfect for the role the eye needs him to play#and then it leads to the ultimate trauma of ripping control away from Jon and forcing him to do something so fucking horrible#something he would never in a million years CHOOSE TO DO#how he's so terrified of being made a pawn and he is. playing a game against elias where he couldn't even see the board#locking him out of his own body...forcing him to open the door. like. FUCK#I MEAN FUCK DUDE. PETER LITERALLY SAYS “HE GOT YOU” WHEN JON ASKED WHAT HIS 'PRIZE' WAS#LIKE SCRATCH THAT!!! FUCKING SCRATCH THAT!! he wasn't even a player he was a fucking PIECE in the game#GOD!!!#GOD!!!! free my boy he did nothing wrong (he did so many things wrong)
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