Good day, sir. Do you have any advice on raising a Porygon, as well as its evolutions? It's my favorite Pokemon, and I'd like to have one as my own.

Excellent choice!

Believe it or not, porygon (and its evolutions) are actually some of the easiest pokémon to care for. A porygon (or its evolutions) doesn’t actually need much in the way of food, and water should be kept to an extreme minimal anyway (as it doesn’t interact well with its electronic-digital nature). It can eat if they choose to, so it wouldn’t hurt to offer the option. Should you choose to do this, porygon and its evolutions will literally eat anything you tell them is food, and they will do so happily. The same sort of kibble you give the rest of your team or small, extra portions of whatever your other teammates will eat should do. Alternatively, you can offer an extra portion of your meals whenever your porygon seems interested. Remember, the main point is feeding porygon only if it seems interested, not because it needs to, as it really gains no nutritional value from what it eats. On the other hand, your porygon will likely engage in mirroring, or the act of mimicking the humans or pokémon around them in order to understand and bond with them.

In truth, what a porygon needs more than anything is a computer. That’s where most of your maintenance will occur. Porygon aren’t tied to any specific computer, so you won’t have to worry about, say, needing to transfer your porygon whenever you buy a new computer. However, it’s always a good idea to start out with something sturdy, quick, and equipped with a considerable amount of RAM and powerful antivirus and anti-malware software. A connection to the internet is also highly recommended to allow your porygon to move from one device to the next without having to exit into the real world. (I would also recommend coupling other devices, such as your pokégear, pokénav, phone, or so forth, with your computer from time to time to allow your porygon to jump from something you own to another piece of personal tech.)

As a note, whether you want a laptop or a desktop is entirely up to you. Desktop computers tend to be sturdier and have more power, but laptops are portable, allowing your porygon to have a refuge no matter where you go. Thus, if you tend to stay at home, consider a desktop, but if you frequently travel, a laptop should do.

That said, once you get this computer, power it on for at least a few hours every day. Encourage your porygon to enter your computer at least once a day to recharge, which is its equivalent to eating. During this time, run your antivirus and/or anti-malware software to “groom” your porygon. If you have a poké ball transporter and a home connection to the storage system, I would also recommend uploading your porygon’s poké ball and running the system’s backup software. This will also pull a backup from your porygon, even if it’s not within the storage system itself.

Also, don’t worry about your porygon wandering around the internet. Porygon and porygon2 are extremely obedient, and it’s unlikely that they’ll wander too far without you. This is also tied into their care regarding play and training. Porygon need very minimal training, not only because they don’t often display behavior that needs to be trained but also because their bodies don’t require much exercise. The only thing you’ll need to be concerned about is really target practice; it’s essential that you hone your porygon’s aim and accuracy especially, as these need to be calibrated over time and are key to their beam attacks. As for play, porygon and porygon2 are fantastically intelligent but also extremely agreeable, and they can get the psychological relief they need from playing any sort of game with you, from fetch to chess. You can even open up a creativity program such as Photoshop and let your porygon play through artistically expressing itself. (You won’t believe how much art on the internet was actually created by porygon. It’s quite fascinating, really.)

Of course, this leads to the metaphorical donphan in the room: porygon-z. Porygon-z, being a pokémon with rather unconventional origins, has a risk of tripping your antivirus software or negatively affecting any computer it touches. For this reason, it’s important for you to be extremely careful when it comes to handling its maintenance and its training. Don’t run your antivirus software on your porygon-z, but if you absolutely must, make sure your porygon-z is whitelisted. You should still run the backup, however; rest assured the system administrators have taken porygon-z’s unusual nature when designing the backup system.

So really, your biggest concern is training, as porygon-z gains more of a personality and thus may pick up several bad habits. Luckily, it’s not as bad as many experts will lead you to believe. In truth, the only reason why porygon-z seems like an insurmountable challenge is because trainers are used to training porygon and porygon2, both of which are among the easiest pokémon to train (in terms of behavior, anyway). With that in mind, porygon-z is really just about as easy to train as any other pokémon; it’s just that you may need to deal with its newfound curiosity. Keep an eye on it and have patience with everything it does. Teach it the difference between exploring its world safely and doing so impulsively or dangerously, and don’t be afraid to use positive reinforcement to help it understand right from wrong.

Best of luck!

How to Pass the Time for Super Smash Bros Ultimate

So, it’s the middle of October, meaning that there is less than two months until Super Smash Bros Ultimate. Sounds exciting, but Old Man Time can be tricky, as he’ll use your excitement to trap you in a mental time trap AKA “boredom”. With that being said, there are some ways to combat this boredom so you won’t become a zombie by December.

1. Play a game you haven’t touched in a while. If you’re looking forward to Super Smash Bros Ultimate, chances are you might be a gamer; ergo, you likely have a library of games. Pick a game that have been collecting dust and give it another go. Who knows, you may end up remembering how much fun it was back then.

2. Watch something you like. If you ended up selling your games to buy Super Smash Bros Ultimate, as well as a Nintendo Switch and even a controller or two, why not turn to watching stuff? Watching videos of Super Smash Bros can be good for improving your skills, but remember to rest and relax with other stuff (I’ll leave what to watch exactly up to you, sir/miss).

3. Get some fresh air. Seriously, just go outside and enjoy the outdoors while you still can. Come December, it’ll be really cold and you’ll struggle to stay warm*. Say, while you’re out already, why not do things with your friends and family, like see a movie, go shopping, etc.

4. Celebrate the holidays. Speaking of social stuff, holidays like Halloween and Thanksgiving are around the corner; perfect for spending time and having fun with your friends and family.

5. Try out solitaire. Get out a deck of cards and play a round or two of solitaire. If you don’t have a deck of cards, they should be available at your local dollar store.

6. *deep breath* DO NOT NEGLECT YOUR PERSONAL HYGIENE!!! Seriously, don’t forget! (That also goes for your health, too!)

7. Try out a new hobby. If hours of playing Super Smash Bros on Wii U is starting to become a drag, why not focus your attention on something new as well? Just try to keep it reasonable (AKA don’t spend hundreds of dollars on something crazy; you need that money for bills, food, and Super Smash Bros Ultimate**).

And that should probably do it (I hope). Trepidation can be a cruel mistress, but with these tips, you’ll probably not feel like you got your soul ripped out and transformed into a gem that grants you magical powers, but will likely turn murky and cause you to become some sad abomination that spreads curses throughout the world (hypothetically speaking, of course). Anyways, I bid you all a good day. :)

Addendum: If it's possible, you may need to get a job.

*Does not apply to those living in the South Hemisphere.

**Come to think of it, I’d prioritize food and bills before the game if I were you. 

First off, Usagi, happy belated birthday! I even made a picture of a cake for you and your friends to enjoy. (Hopefully, it didn't go bad...) Anyways: Ami, just out of curiosity, how much energy does the average magical girl (or at least Sailor Senshi) use in battle?

Thank you! I lover it, especially the little shooting star so cute!

We used to use up using most of our energy if not all but, since we’ve been fighting for a while we try to be strategic most youma’s don’t take a lot of energy to defeat now a days.

Love, please.

love: have you ever fallen in love? describe what it feels like to realise you’re in love.

I have! It feels nice but also very scary, cause what if that person doesn’t see you the same way you see them, what if this will ruin your friendship, what if you shouldn’t feel like that towards them...these type of questions haunt you but at the same time you are happy you get to experience so much love towards them, you are just happy that they are happy, that they decide to share even a bit of their happiness with you but everything they do bring joy to you. You now clearly know why. 

Super Smash Haikus, anyone?

So, I’m thinking in celebration of Super Smash Bros Ultimate, I’ll probably write some haikus about the characters. Does that sound interesting to you guys? Please, let me know.

Welp, I’m calling it now: we’re probably not going to hear any more announcements regarding newcomers in Super Smash Bros until, like September, or something.

About Super Smash Bros. Ultimate

Yeah... I think it looks like another... smash hit for the Nintendo Switch!

But seriously, I really like this so far. I mean, for one thing, everyone's here, and I mean everyone! Ice Climbers, Snake, Young Link, Wolf... and yes, even Pichu... Overall, we've got ourselves the complete roster!!! So, yeah, that's pretty cool. Not to mention the newcomers: Ridley, Daisy, the Inklings...

Also, I like how the fighters look more... toy-like, for a lack of a better word. Which makes sense, all things considering. Although, I admit the Mii Fighters do look rather... different to me. It's not a criticism per say; it's just that I'm going to miss their old design, that's all. That being said...

*deep breath*

ZELDA'S NEW DESIGN IS SO ADORABLE!!! LIKE, SERIOUSLY, SHE LOOKS SO CUTE IN THIS GAME!!!!

*pant pant*

So, yeah, those are my thoughts on Super Smash Bros. Ultimate thus far. It's pretty exciting to see what else is in store. And, you know, I have a feeling it's not just me, either.

(But real talk, Zelda looks so pretty in this game.)

Oh, you know how it is: just waiting for an announcement on a new character for Super Smash Bros Ultimate, hoping for a certain somebody to be confirmed while knowing that could only happen when pigs gain a pair of wings.

You know, the usual.

(No spoilers, please.)

Pokémon Theory: Mimikyu... An Endangered Species?!

WARNING: SPOILERS FOR POKEMON SUN AND MOON!!!

Pokémon Sun and Moon has brought us quite a collection of new Pokémon for us to discover, and perhaps the most interesting one of all is the Disguise Pokémon Mimikyu. This little Ghost-Fairy type is well known for dressing up as Pikachu to get the attention of Trainers, but why? Well, what if I were to tell you that this particular behavior underlines a very serious problem: the decline of the Mimikyu population? Sounds a little out there, I hear you saying, but hear me out, and I promise that it’ll actually make sense in the end. Keep in mind, however, that this is merely a theory.

Now, what made me think of such a theory in the first place is Mimikyu’s extremely low encounter rate in Alola at merely 5%. Now remember, this is a Pokémon that instinctually disguises itself as a Pikachu to get the attention of a Trainer, so it’s not like it’s trying to hide itself from humans or something. But that begs the question: What caused the population decline in the first place? Well, obviously, habitat destruction for one: the Thrifty Megamart in Ula’Ula Island was built on sacred land; as a result, Tapu Bulu smashed the place up Hulk-style. This constant destruction, first of the trees, then the dark corners they call home, exposed the poor Mimikyu to the sun, causing them to get ill and die. With their population at threatening levels, the Mimikyu, desperate to not become extinct, turned to the Pikachu merchandise as inspiration and disguised themselves as Pikachu so that Trainers could catch and breed them; after all, we humans are clearly drawn to creatures that are considered “cute”.

TL;DR The Mimikyu, having their homes destroyed constantly, dress up as Pikachu to increase their numbers.

Okay, so here’s something pretty surprising that I’ve been thinking about lately: Kirby is small. Like, really small. Yes, I know that’s obvious, but we’re talking, and I kid you not, 8 inches tall! Now, I know what you’re thinking: “Well, that is something we already know about.” But from there, I’ve discovered something interesting. While this fact heavily implies that a lot of denizens from Pop Star are indeed small, one of the most surprising discoveries I’ve made with this involves King Dedede, the self-proclaimed king of Dream Land. After doing some size comparison, I’ve found out that, on average, he is about as tall as three Kirbies. In other words, King Dedede stands at a staggering 2 feet tall! No joke, everyone; even at his tallest, he can’t even reach 3 feet! To put this in prospective, Mario, everyone’s favorite plumber, stands at 5 feet and one inch. But maybe that’s just me. What do you think?

You know what's tragic about friendships? As much as you really care about them, the laughs you share, the tears you shed together, the good times you have had together; no matter how strong your bond is, there is but one cruel constant: that at any moment, it'll all come to an end, and there is nothing you can do about it. So, enjoy what limited time you have together. Cherish your friends like the treasure that they are. And never take them for granted. But, maybe that's just me.

Corey R. Weyandt

How it feels to write a book (at least according to my experiences).

Pokémon Theory: The Origin of Porygon-Z (pt. 3)

So, I just finished playing through the main story of Pokémon Moon, and before I say anything else, know that there are spoilers, so if you don’t want your Alolan experience ruined, then you should probably skip on this one. Anyways, onwards, fellow Trainers!

So here’s the thing: The Alola Dex is, first of all, a little lacking in terms of Pokémon you could find without resorting to PokeBank. That being said, I was rather ecstatic that Porygon and its evolutions were included in Alola. However, there were some implications that I needed to address here, because they could shed some more light on our digital friend here.

First off, when you’re on a mission to rescue Lillie and Nebby from the Aether Foundation, you come across some employees deep within the Aether Foundation, wearing some sort of hazmat suits or something like that; one of them had a Porygon2. Now, one could call it a coincidence, as a Scientist near the Power Plant had a Porygon, so it might be simply because science and Porygon go hand-in-hand. But, there is more, believe me.

Another thing to consider is how one gets the Porygon line in Alola. The only way to do so (outside of trading and breeding) is from an Aether employee in the Aether House. Another employee in the same room gives you an Up-Grade to evolve it. Now both of those could be written off as a coincidence, but then there’s Faba. After becoming Champion, you’ll find the newly demoted Faba in the Aether Foundation. After defeating his team, he gives you, of all things, a Dubious Disc. When you put it all together, this implies that the Aether Foundation may have something to do with Porygon-Z’s creation. (Also worth noting that one of your challengers as Champion is Gladion, who has added a Porygon-Z to his team.)

So, what does it mean? Well, considering that the Aether Foundation was involved in experiments concerning Type: Null and the Ultra Beasts, I have a feeling that Porygon-Z may be connected to those experiments. With that in mind, was I wrong about Team Galactic? Or is there a connection between Galactic and Aether? And what about the Porygon-Z you can find with Poke Finder? What do you guys think about all of this?

Real talk: Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, expected Piranha Plant to be a playable character! I'm not even mad; if anything I'm impressed!