WIG REVIEW: THE EYES OF TAMMY FAYE
Happy new year from another biopic of the damned!! Sure this came out a few months ago but it only *just* became available to stream on HBO this week. If you care at all about the life of gay icon and makeup loving televangelist, Tammy Faye Bakker-Messner, please just watch the 2000 documentary of the same name NARRATED BY RUPAUL. However, if you like thirsty wigs, Oscar thirst traps, and general thirst generated by drinking way too much diet coke, this movie is for you! Let’s discuss.
We begin at the end - or at least close to the end? Tammy Faye herself joined the 700 Club in the sky in 2007 but we begin this biopic in 1994 where a heavily made up/old aged/bewigged Jessica Chastain (as Tammy Faye) tells her makeup girl (AND US) that she can’t take any more makeup off because IT IS TATTOOED ONTO HER FACE. This is for sure a parable for this film itself because there are only so many layers of makeup you can take off to reveal the true Tammy Faye UNLESS YOU ARE A PERFECT DOCUMENTARY.
We are then transported back to 60s Minnesota where a young, brunette Tammy Faye is attending bible college and is immediately smitten with a young Jim Bakker. First off: obviously, Jessica Chastain and Andrew Garfield are far more attractive than their real life counterparts but this movie really tries to make them kinda sorta look like them? This brunette wig is FINE and definitely a remnant of first season THE CROWN but like whatever? Meanwhile, Tammy decides to marry Jim AFTER HE TELLS HER A HORRIFIC STORY ABOUT ALMOST MURDERING A CHILD IN ORDER TO NOT HAVE PREMARITAL SEX. IS THIS STORY TRUE?!?! (It is maybe true). Also they get married in order to have sex. Religion, man!
Tammy spends most of the movie attempting to win approval from her mother, as played by the ever ornery Cherry Jones. Most of her wigs are just like little old lady wigs which you could probably buy from The Paula Young wig catalog (and you probably should!) Also Cherry Jones should have an Oscar! Just saying!
Anyway, a now married Bakker couple sets out to spread religion through songs and handmade puppets and end up as local tv hosts. Tammy inexplicably becomes platinum blonde and this wig is - again I guess fine? Tammy’s obsession with her appearance, specifically always wearing makeup and having her hair perfectly coiffed is absolutely never explained. Also! As is always the case with male wigs - this 70s cut on Jim is pretty terrible all around!
Also terrible all around? MEN, ALWAYS! Tammy is forced out of her tv job for the audacity of having a child and then is not allowed to sit at a table full of assholes at Jerry Falwell’s house so she can eat a hot dog. Tammy is a low-key feminist and LGBTQIA supporter from the start but probably isn’t even aware of that herself? Tammy’s wide eyed cluelessness is very endearing and at times definitely baffling.
Also baffling? MAN WIGS ALWAYS. Andrew Garfield’s parade of man wigs in this movie is NOT GREAT. The texture is just plain awful but as man wigs go, they don’t really jut out at the back of the neck like most do, so I guess they’re not the worst?
They say the higher the hair, the closer to god, and I guess the wigmaster on this took that to heart? As Tammy and Jim’s celebrity grows...so does their hair! These wigs are honestly not awful! I cannot say the same for the old age makeup but I’m not here to judge that.
Truly, no one on the planet is having as much fun as Jessica Chastain in this movie and like: good for her?!
Also Vincent D’Onofrio plays Jerry Falwell which is legit LOL but truly when I look at both of these dude wigs I am SHOCKED to find them to be ok??
Meanwhile, Tammy is NOT OK despite outward appearances of turquoise calm. Her strawberry perm has gotten out of control and she almost sorta has an affair right before giving birth (OMG IS THIS TRUE?!?!)
Her post-partum depression comes with a bent blonde wig and an opioid addiction. I have to give it up to this wig for being so purposefully bent.
BUT WHY IS HER MAKEUP SO PRISTINE?!?! Consistency, people! If your hair is a mess, your eye makeup should be too! AND WE’RE TALKING ABOUT TAMMY FAYE!
Anyway, as Tammy’s fame and addiction spiral out of control, we are treated to a delicious disco bop that I seriously cannot get out of my head. Truly: Jessica Chastain, I’m glad that you were having a blast making this!
As we hit the scandal years, the old age makeup takes a turn for the completely ridiculous but the wigs remain consistently fine. They do their best to look like these bonkers weirdos!
I really do appreciate all the different shades of tawny that these wigs are giving us. Tammy was a spectrum of blondes, y’all.
And look at these feathered bangs!! I FEEL THIS LATE 80S VIBE IN MY SOUL. Anyway, we all know the story - Tammy and Jim lost everything (and rightly so) but again - the wig arc remains very detailed!
As we come back to the beginning, we see older/redhead Tammy once again...and TAMMY DOES A WIG REVEAL! I screamed!!! The fact that this shitty red wig is revealed to be a wig within the context of the film WAS EVERYTHING. I am often wig gaslighted by wigs we know to be wigs within the narrative of films which are the same quality as wigs being passed off as real hair.
I LOVE THAT THERE ARE TWO DIFFERENT WIG CONSISTENCIES HERE FOR REAL HAIR AND WIGS! THIS NEVER HAPPENS! THIS WIG IS PURPOSELY SHITTY AND I LOVE IT!!!!! Therefore, as many male wig ghostmares as their might have been via Andrew Garfield, I have to give this movie a passing grade for showing us the light and grace of differing wigs as wigs! (HOWEVER PLEASE JUST WATCH THE DOCUMENTARY INSTEAD)
VERDICT: WURQS
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After swimming at the Chelsea pool, I saw Cherry Jones biking down 23rd street, a coffee in her hand, looking beautiful and happy and free. "Cherry Jones we love you!" I yelled, even though there was no one to make a we with me. We as in people like me. We as in theatre lovers. We as in New Yorkers. She turned back, and I was like, Don't no no no Don't turn back I don't want you to fall and it'll be my fault. She rode on. Once she saw me in a play. Monster by Neal Bell at Classic Stage Company. Micheal Pitt and Annie Parrise Michael - oh I can't remember his last name! The cast had fun in that show- oh we had matinees for teens and Annie and I almost broke during a sexual exchange. The kids were Howling at us. I met Cherry afterwards, one of my idols, I spent my 20's wanting to be a Broadway actress like her- she may have been the last Broadway actress. She said something like, "Good work" and I thought Oh that could mean anything but then she said, "You're a strong actor , you're good in this." And I kvelled. (Of course I don't remember exactly what she said but can quote my bad reviews.) Cherry Jones is a godess. I saw her this morning. It made me feel happy and strong. I'm on my way to therapy now, starting "Prolonged Exposure" therapy with a woman who specializes in PTSD and sexual trauma. I am terrified and excited. One thing cancer did really give me was the feeling if I absolutely have to deal with my past so I can love fully with the time I have left. So thanks #cancer. #fuckcancer #lesbiancrush #goddess #cherryjones #ptsd #ovariancancer #uterinecancer #rape #trauma #sexualassualt #healing #love #theatre
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#CUMPLEAÑOS: #GoldieHawn (74) - #JenaMalone (35) - #CherryJones (63) √
#CUMPLEAÑOS: #GoldieHawn (74) – #JenaMalone (35) – #CherryJones (63) √
Goldie Hawn cumple 74 años. / Imagen via: Paul Morigi/ Getty Images Jena Malone cumple 35 años. / Imagen via: Amanda Edwards/ Getty Images Cherry Jones cumple 63 años. / Imagen via: Dominik Bindl/ Getty Images
#GoldieHawn – #JenaMalone – #CherryJones
Goldie Hawn, Jena Malone, Cherry Jones (Getty Images)
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