my ex is talking about all these cute dates they're going on with this trans guy and how they're planning to kiss for the first time tonight and i just wish i had something like that with someone. if i had transitioned maybe i could've had a chance of being attractive to them... i only say that bc i reallyyyy struggle to believe i'll find my person. i feel so unattractive physically and personality wise :/ and i have no money to my name, and my apartment is constantly a mess. all the girls i was into turned out to be a jerk or rejected me. What Is It Going To Take!!!!!!

I have this crush on a guy for four months now and i don't know how to feel about it. Back then during my first year in highschool, i didn't really pay much attention to him and never got the chance to interact also. He's actually a year younger than me in terms of school grade but he's the same age as me. Idk if he remembers me but i got to know him bcos of a person we both know. A close friend of his who i quite made a bad impression cos this friend of his had the same crush on a guy i liked and vice versa. But, i apologized to them after realizing my mistake. i still feel bad tho. So, back to the present! He hardly posts anything on his socmed and it's usually memes, cars, and about him feeling insecured of his looks whenever he finds someone cute and sweet. I kinda get jealous actually. I get this jittery feeling each time he updates on socmed. It's the only part i can hold on to him. Although, idk if this is bcos he's buff and toned up that i started noticing him. Probably. Im a bit dismayed about that. I want to get to know him. But there are times where my hopes arise. One time, i posted a pic of my cat and then several minutes later he shared a post saying "meow meow meow" and another time, i posted a selfie of me where a pillow of a fox with its eyes closed was shown. After that, he posted a stuff toy i think that has its eyes closed too. I told my friend about that and told me that mayb it's just a coincidence. I tried not to think much about it but i can't help it. I want to tell him how i feel but im unsure yet cos im not really certain if this "feelings" are real or just a mere attraction. Perhaps. But, I daydream on holding his hands, resting my head on his shoulder and do those things i've always wanted with a person i like. I cannot act however cos my parents are strict and i need to study first. Im afraid on being rejected. I almost started playing video games just to share his hobbies and mayb get the chance to talk to him but that would only be pretentious, right? And maybe creepy of me. He's the person i think of when i wake up and before going to bed. I check his socmed each time and have i become obsessed?! Idk. R u familiar with the anon messages? I messaged another friend of his that i have a crush on him and then they told me to message him but i know I can't. Should i text him? Or should i just bury these feelings? Do you think im being creepy?

hello!! this is a lot to unpack — but i will do my best in giving advice <3

if you think you may have a chance with him and there isn’t anything holding you back from confessing, i see no reason why you should bury your feelings. however, when it comes to strict parents having a relationship can be an issue. it all depends on how strict they are and how easily you could keep it hidden from them (but of course if something happens and you trust them you should tell them, your well-being matters most.)

the stuff about the things you and him have posted on social media could be a coincidence like your friend said, but who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it could be him trying to subtly show that he noticed you. and when it comes to hobbies, i don’t think you should make yourself get into something simply just because he’s into it as well. instead, try and see if you have anything in common with him that you can bond over. no need to change yourself while pursuing a crush!

also, i don’t think you’re being creepy. you aren’t crossing boundaries or making him uncomfortable, checking up on a person that your interested in is nothing to feel ashamed of. it seems more like you’re infatuated.

overall, i think you should go for it and message him. if you’re afraid of rejection, then start out by messaging him casually, maybe send him a post about a game he likes? if you manage to talk to him more often you’ll be able to better understand how he feels about you & if he’s interested. and who knows, maybe he’ll make a move first :) and if it turns out he’s not interested, don’t feel discouraged. at the very least, you will not be forced to stress over the question of whether he likes you or not, and it won’t be the end of the world. i’m sure you’ve heard this before (pretty sure everyone has) but there are so many people in this world, there’s bound to be someone for you.

i wish you luck!!

A Meta on Catra’s Relationships with DT, Scorpia, and Adora

I’m so excited to write this finally ljsdflkj okay so. I’ve been thinking about why the creators would choose to center a whole season around this new character Double Trouble. They drove the plot and played a major role in a really important part of the story, Catra’s redemption. So I wanna think more about the purpose of this character and go deeper into a couple of their scenes with Catra.

tbh Catra and DT’s very first interaction says it all: DT literally takes the form of Scorpia and tells Catra “I’m about to become your new best friend.” As the season goes on, Double Trouble replaces Scorpia as a sort of artificial confidant for Catra. But it blows up in her face and the purpose of the whole thing is to shed light on Catra’s main internal conflict: her desire for love vs. her fear of heartbreak/vulnerability.

In other words, I believe Double Trouble was introduced as a foil to Scorpia. But if we think about how Scorpia is also a foil to Adora, then that means DT is like... a foil to a foil. So they’re not directly associated with Adora but a lot of what they do relates back to her. Yeah there are a lot of layers here lmao but basically what I’m gonna analyze is how Catra’s relationships with these three characters intertwine and build off each other in season 4 to set the stage for Catra’s redemption (and catradora endgame hollaaa)

So in the beginning, Catra and DT both understand their relationship to be a business arrangement. When does that start to change for Catra, and why?

Catra’s History With Betrayal

Just think about Catra’s relationships at the start of s4.. After the portal, Adora had basically severed whatever was left of their relationship, and that was shown to be weighing on Catra all season. Scorpia and Entrapta were the only other people she cared about, but Entrapta betrayed her (first by monopolizing Hordak’s attention then by refusing to open the portal), then Scorpia dared to question her decision to send their friend to die and her presence became a constant reminder of Catra’s guilt. In fact, the mere mention of Entrapta’s name in 4x03 causes Catra to snap and yell at Scorpia “we are not friends!” ... which of course isn’t true. Catra may think Scorpia’s annoying but she confided in her, her loyalty made Catra feel like she could trust her.. and that’s exactly why Catra always tried so hard to push her away. All the betrayals in her life scarred her so deeply that she wanted to avoid emotional intimacy at all costs. I’m about to get Jungian up in this shit bc we see a deep disconnect between Catra’s outward actions (her conscious) and her inner desires (subconscious) this season and it’s this i believe that leads to her breakdown in 4x10. It’s an unsustainable way to live.

Why Catra Trusted Double Trouble

So by 4x04, Catra had sabotaged her only two relationships. She was utterly alone, and vulnerable, and Double Trouble was in the right place at the right time offering their loyalty to her.. so Catra did what any emotionally stable person would do and subconsciously used a hired mercenary to try and fill the growing void in her heart. I don’t think Catra actually cared about DT much at all, like sure they got along and that matters on some level, but I think it’s more that Catra was in a vulnerable place and DT was the only one around.

So why does Catra trust Double Trouble when she won’t let herself trust anyone else? I’ve seen some posts saying it’s because Catra is self-destructive--i.e. she only seeks love from people who won’t give it to her because she doesn’t believe she deserves love--which is super true.. but I think her motivations can be better explained by saying that Catra knew from the start that Double Trouble didn’t really care about her, and that’s why the partnership was attractive to her (at first). She thought it would be safe--no vulnerability, no risk of heartbreak. But the truth is Catra’s just not as disaffected as she wishes she was.

The moment Catra really let her guard down was when Double Trouble saved her from the collapsing building in 4x04. 

can we just!! talk about this scene!!!! the way her voice shakes when she says “saving me” just, oh my god... like what a touchy subject for her, right? Shes spent her whole life resenting how Adora was always trying to “save” her from everything. I’m not sure but I think White Out (2x05) was the only other time Catra thanked someone for saving her life, and she just says “thanks for getting us out of there.” So her use of the word “save” here is special and it illustrates how deeply vulnerable Catra feels this season, and more importantly it’s a sign of character development! It’s no coincidence that the theme of saving is connected between DT, Scorpia, and Adora. It’s leading up to Catra learning to replace her resentment towards Adora with something closer to gratitude. 

But while the scene connects these relationships, it also highlights their differences. After Catra displays an astounding amount of vulnerability with DT, they coolly reply “well, I live to serve... for a price, of course.”

This right here is the first step of Catra’s breakdown. Suppressed desires making themselves known, one half of her heart rebelling against the other. She was pushing away her real friends and finding hollow companionship with someone she thought she wouldn’t get attached to, but it happened anyway.

The difference between Double Trouble and Scorpia must have become glaringly obvious to Catra in that moment. Whereas Scorpia was loyal to Catra out of love, DT was mostly interested in getting paid. And she was surprised by how much that hurt. She fucking hated how much it hurt, you can see it written all over her face. It’s why she fails Scorpia’s little test in 4x06. Because of Double Trouble, Catra’s true desires were threatening to break free, so outwardly she fights against it and acts more resistant than ever to being friends with Scorpia. She castigates her, calls her annoying and incompetent, harsher than we’ve ever seen... but she didn’t expect Scorpia to hit back (we did, tho. Scorpia’s an icon).

In four words Scorpia teaches Catra a hard lesson about what it means to earn someone’s loyalty. She knew she must’ve really fucked up if she somehow managed to push away the most loyal person in all of Etheria. And again the fake nature of Catra’s relationship with Double Trouble provides a reference for her to see why Scorpia’s loyalty, based in love, was so valuable, and why she shouldn’t have taken it for granted. It also relates to Adora because, similar to Scorpia, Adora had been trying so hard these past 3 seasons to connect with Catra, but she refused to forgive her and her behavior eventually forced Adora to cut ties. So Scorpia calling her out pushes Catra towards accepting some personal responsibility for everything that happened with Adora, too. Man there are just.. a ton of implications here.

Then Catra gives Hordak a fun pep talk but really it’s just her self-projecting all over him:

At this point her hateful actions and her goal to conquer Etheria are extremely out of line with her true desires and we can see it’s really affecting her mental state. It wasn’t just one thing or person that caused her breakdown, it was a combination of Adora severing their relationship, and Scorpia’s disappointment in her, and Double Trouble’s indifference towards her. All three of these situations were playing off each other and chipping away at Catra’s carefully crafted armor, revealing a desire to be loved hidden underneath... which she continued to fight against for as long as she could. Adora and Scorpia were playing their roles in helping Catra learn to take responsibility for her life, but those relationships wouldn’t have been so effective had it not been for how they were contrasted with Double Trouble’s indifference. Anyway have I mentioned how amazing and complex this show is????

Catra Loses DT and Scorpia Around the Same Time

4x07 is the last time Catra talks to Double Trouble before they get captured by the rebels. Coincidentally, Catra realizes that Scorpia left her just one episode later, which once again points to a connection between these two characters. From 4x08 to 4x11 Catra is completely alone, feeling like she has lost everyone in her life. It sets the stage for her meltdown in 4x10. But my fave part about Scorpia leaving is how it changes the way Catra thinks about betrayal. 

Even if Scorpia didn’t tell Catra where she was going in the note she left, Catra had to have assumed she was leaving to join the Rebellion because where else would she have gone right? So the two people Catra loves most have now BOTH abandoned her to join the rebellion. I don’t even wanna think about how triggering that betrayal must have been for Catra.. I don’t wanna think about how the next time Catra sees Scorpia she’s going to be a full blown princess with powers and everything, just like what happened with Adora. 

But there’s a key difference between Adora and Scorpia. Catra knows at this point that Adora didn’t want to leave her behind, but she did anyway to pursue some destiny that Catra wasn’t a part of, which left her feeling betrayed. Scorpia, on the other hand--the very definition of ‘loyalty’--left her specifically because Catra pushed her away. Her fear of vulnerability manifested as anger towards someone she refused to admit that she cared about, and it pushed her away.

Once again I think Scorpia is teaching Catra a lesson about taking responsibility for some of the shit in her life. It’s a privilege that Adora lost after being careless with Catra’s trust, and thus Scorpia was the only one in a position to reach Catra and help her. But I think that the things Catra learned from Scorpia are going to play back into her relationship with Adora and allow them to reconcile (when Adora deals with her own issues too).

We can also say a little about how Double Trouble’s betrayal contrasts with Scorpia’s and Adora’s. I think their complete emotional detachment is the perfect frame of reference for Catra to be able to acknowledge that even though Scorpia and Adora left her, they DID love her, and they never stopped trying to reach out to her--at least, not until Catra crossed a line with both of them. At some point, Catra went from being justified in her feelings of betrayal to overdoing it, placing too much blame where it didn’t belong and closing the door to forgiveness. So I think that’s the role that Double Trouble played there, helping Catra see that difference. Like even if someone leaves you, hurts you, it doesn’t always mean they don’t love you. Relationships take work and understanding and forgiveness and you have to learn how to handle that or you’ll always be alone. Scorpia’s the pure embodiment of that lesson, and she’s lighting the way for Catra to navigate the much more nebulous waters of her grudge against Adora.

Double Trouble’s Betrayal

So now Catra is feeling abandoned by Scorpia and Double Trouble (her only friends) and we see the disconnect between what’s in her heart and the front she’s been putting on come to a head in 4x10 when she has that meltdown. She’s kind of losing it because her fear and heartbreak are driving her down a path that she doesn’t actually want. It’s like watching a car crash in slow motion. In 4x12 she continues to hold on desperately to the idea that beating Adora will make her happy, because at this point she doesn’t see any way to turn the car around.

There’s an absolutely fantastic scene early in 4x12 that sets up Double Trouble’s betrayal beautifully, like really it’s a masterpiece. Catra’s childhood friends walk in on her in the locker room and they’re laughing and joking around and for a second it’s like... Catra longs to be a part of that again.. To have friends, to be happy. But then Kyle accidentally kicks one of Scorpia’s old doodles (a painful reminder that she’s gone) and Catra freaks out and attacks them. Kyle’s like “we used to be friends, why are you treating us like this?” So she lets them leave, feeling alone and miserable, and THAT’S when Double Trouble waltzes in... having had just made a deal with Glimmer to double cross Catra.

God it hurts so much. The contrast between her pushing away Scorpia and her real friends, and then her childlike relief upon seeing the person who just sold her out.

This scene gives me fucking chills with the nightmare-ish music and everything.. It’s like, at this point DT is just fucking with her, they’ve already got Catra figured out. This face touch is so cruel and fits with the show’s motif of manipulative affection, too. For me it felt very disconcerting to see Catra like this... unaware that she’s been defeated yet she’s so emotionally vulnerable here, she’s like putty in Double Trouble’s hands. Scorpia leaving cracked her open and, as they’re the last person left standing with Catra’s trust, Double Trouble’s in the perfect position to come in and break her.

So the next episode 4x13 has that crazy scene where Double Trouble totally obliterates Catra and I’m not even gonna talk about it lmao because yall have already done a great job analyzing it. But I do wanna draw attention to the fact that this is the only thing she says in this whole scene:

Can you believe that’s what mattered the most to her in that moment? Not that literally everything she had been working for for the past 4 seasons had just turned to dust before her eyes, but the fact that this random mercenary she hired betrayed her. And there was no anger at all, just... heartbreak.

And then look at what she says to Glimmer afterwards (setting aside the fact that Catra is basically giving up on life...) she says nothing about the war, nothing about winning or revenge. The only thing she’s thinking about is how lonely she feels.

So by the end of Season 4, I think Catra did finally figure out what she truly wanted in life. She didn’t want to be on top just for power’s sake, she wanted people to respect her, to love her, so that no one could hurt her anymore. But she was so obsessed with winning that she ended up losing everyone’s respect. Wow haha if only she could get a second chance to earn it back the right way.... like say if, idk, she was trapped in space jail and forced to team up with her sworn enemy to survive and they came out best friends or something <:)

To sum up, Double Trouble’s role in Season 4 was to break Catra’s mask and force her to consider what she truly wants. I think their betrayal taught Catra to really appreciate what a terrible mistake she made in pushing Scorpia and Adora away. It taught her the difference between someone leaving her because they don’t care about her, and someone cutting ties with her even though they do care for her very deeply, they just couldn’t take Catra treating them like crap anymore. It showed her that what Adora did was nothing like what DT did. That’s what a betrayal feels like when the person doesn’t care about you. Someone who doesn’t care about you isn’t going to beg for your forgiveness for 3 seasons and risk being obliterated from existence just to get you back.

But the real beauty of season 4 was how Catra hitting rock bottom had almost nothing to do with Adora. With the help of other friends Catra has begun to find her own reasons to change, she’s acknowledging her guilt and heartbreak and discovering the person she wants to become. She’s learning to take responsibility instead of just blaming other people. And this character development had nothing to do with romance, just like how Adora breaking free of her destiny and learning to let go of control had little to do with Catra. I love the different perspectives on love that they give us with Catra, Adora, and Scorpia. I love how this show takes the “love conquers all” trope and subverts it, saying that sometimes.. love breaks you. Sometimes it’s not enough. Sometimes it’s used as a weapon. Sometimes you have to let go of people you love, but it opens up space for you to figure out who you are and what you want and to conquer your own demons. You’ll come out the other side with a better understanding of what real, healthy love is supposed to look like. And maybe in the end, the love you always sought will find you again, in its own time, in its own way. 💘

What does Wyatt Halliwell act like in his teenagers age? and what is his personality? Is he bad boy type and ladies man/player/womanizer? Wyatt is more like his daddy boy. Chris Halliwell is more like his mama’s boy, like he is responsible and serious about school and other things. Can you do it like headcanons? Also, what is their interest in women like wild they date/fell in love with a female demon?

okay so this ask made me remember that wyatt is not actually gay in canon but for all intents and purposes every time i write about know that i am writing him as a gay man. But, for this ask, i will write for a wyatt that is attracted to women.

for starters, the wyatt that we did see in canon is this really open and earnest guy who very clearly believes in good and sort of an intrinsic plan for everything and definitely holds this belief that if you keep an open mind and an open heart, everything will fall right into place. so i think he’s totally a hopeless romantic. i also think he’d be really self conscious because he really is this all powered embodiment of good magic meaning that within magic circles and receives A Lot of attention all the time, so he feels the need to be like especially likable (especially because the elders were so scared he’s turn evil that they tries to kill him so uhh better prove that you’re so very super Not Evil). so like, translating over into mortal circles, he can’t necessarily shed this really need to be an insanely likable, good person. and bc of this whole being a good, likable person, who’s also like tall and blond but still has this edge of mystery bc like wtf why does he mysteriously vanish for long periods of time w no explanation what’s up with that i feel like the type of girl that is really attracted to wyatt are the one’s who read romance novels. and i think the attraction goes both ways because they both sort of share this honest belief in true love and all that passion for these tales of finding great love and keeping it against all odds. that being said i think all of his relationships end pretty poorly because there’s always this jump then fall intense dramatic passion that almost always devolves into wither one of them getting to clingy or someone getting too intense or serious. i think wyatt genuinely falls in love with almost everyone he dates, and has both broken several hearts and gotten his heart broken several times. i feel like he would never be on like really bad terms with any of his exs but i don’t think that he would really be friends or like on speaking terms with any of them bc it’s just too awkward to try to be casual and small talk with anyone who you have shared such an almost like overdramatic relationship with. voted most likely to write a song on acoustic guitar for his girlfriend.

chris i think is really the opposite of wyatt like again if your brother is like this adored figure who is very much a people person and liked by everyone you can either be a try hard and try to worm your way into his circles in an cringy desperate manner or you can be aloof and act like you really don’t care and specifically build your social circles around those your brother isn’t involved in (there is, of course, the third option of just being like yourself as a normal person and not letting your familial relationships dictate who you become friends with but uhh chris didn’t think of that one) so he definitely hangs out with the misfits and only really dates those in his circle. and i say “date” but it is like the loosest meaning of the word. while wyatt goes all in and falls in love every time, chris tends to keep his armor up. he just,, he doesn’t want to go through all the effort of revealing his true self and being honest and open and all that, especially if there’s no guarantee it’ll yield anything good. i mean, that’s what wyatt does and he’s seen his brother’s heart break countless times. and on top of that he’s really become wrapped up in sort of this brand of skinny tall brunet with daddy issues because a lot of people really find that attractive. but no, he is not willing to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.

as far as a demon love interest: i think chris would be most likely to have a relationship with a demon as again his idea of relationship is really guarded it’s not rooted in trust its very surface level so like they would both go into this relationship knowing it’s a horrible idea and will never last, but at least it’ll be fun. wyatt on the other hand i don’t think would ever knowingly date a demon because whoa! bad idea! but i think that if he were to be conned it would very much be a phoebe situation because once again he loves with his whole heart he’s very open and vulnerable. that being said, i think wyatt prizes his family above all else so if it was a cole situation he would definitely vanquish his love to save his family. but if it was more of a accidentally falling in love with a demon after a coffee shop meet cute where she doesn’t know he’s charmed and he doesn’t know she’s a demon that could have slightly more potential. if i were to do a plotline like this tho, i would actually make her a warlock and not a demon, because i think warlocks can defect to good and become witches, as it’s shown it can go the other way as well. demon is just too permanent. that being said, i still don’t think a wyatt demon relationship would prosper because it’s just too dangerous. again, he’s more of a hopeless romantic, the element of danger and the potential of betrayal isn’t a thrill ride it’s an encroaching fear. and especially with his family breathing down his neck bc they have seen how bad a demon witch relationship can turn, i don’t see him going through with that. even if he loved her, i think he would still break up with her (now if you then wanna pull a two households both alike in dignity situation it could be done but as previously stated i think demons are really difficult to redeem in the charmed universe)

Grossest thing you’ve seen in a bathroom? pee, poop and blood mixed with vomit all over the place Do you consider your family dysfunctional? all families are toxic, more or less Do you hate people who act like everything is fine when its not? I hate those people, they both want you to leave them alone and guess, they’re annoyed with the fact you wanna know as much as you not caring about them, never satisfied, then blame everybody else, how are we supposed to act if we feel you don’t trust us enough to tell the truth? it’s your own fault! we also have problems, not everything’s about you, if you prefer to kill yourself than speak up, that’s your choice but it means you’re a coward, I’m tired of that behavior

Ever had a body piercing ripped out? never had a piercing so I’m lucky not to be bullied this way

Can you sew/croshet/knit? I know basics but I have no patience so it’s not my hobby Do you put the cap back on the toothpaste after using it? of course :o  Have you shot off a firework? never, it’s dangerous, I prefer to look and from afar  Are you offended when you see women breast feeding? no

Do you hate when people keep things from you? if we’re close then sure Can you multitask? I can XD

*działam na dwa fronty, boobs, albo na tyłach* Are you too sensitive? hypersensitive Who wears the pants in the relationship? who wears the socks and cowboy hat tho?

If you were given three things to make you happy, what would these be? health, money and no worries How would you rank the following in importance: family, career, love life? family and love life then career as I’m not interested in it 

Which would you prefer: having a baby without a partner or a partner without a baby? partner without a baby  but tbh it would be better to raise a baby without a partner if I decided to have a kid (I don’t want children though) as there wouldn’t be disagreements on how to nor risk of arguments and then divorce in general which would be super hard for the little one 

Do you think God is real, and why? sigh...

Do you believe in giving people second chances, and why? rarely as it’s like putting your hand into fire hoping it will be cold this time, people usually change for worse - not better Do you think people fall in love because the right person has arrived, or because the time is right (regardless of whom the person is that they fall in love with)? because of other reasons usually as I wouldn’t call their relationships LOVE, they’re just desperate, scared of being lonely How important is trust in a relationship? I don’t think I can trust someone completely but still it’s very important to me to trust them as much as I am capable to - if I can’t trust them at all then it won’t work  How do you feel about infidelity? it makes people feel like they’re not enough and they also get paranoid later, it causes trauma, person who was cheated on will always be afraid to trust another human being in case someone “better” will show up, nobody is perfect but it’s better if you break up than do smth romantic or sexual behind your partner’s back, nobody deserves it, if you can’t be with one person only then either do open relationships or polyamory or just don’t commit to anyone - one night stands or something - infidelity is caused by wanting more and being impulsive, liking adrenaline, risky behavior, you are some sort of an abuser, not just a liar, because you’re hurting someone who’s supposed to be closest to you, intoxication isn’t an excuse, if you can’t keep it in your pants when you’re drunk then don’t drink too much or publicly - simple as that, love is a promise and you’re breaking it for fun, someone said today that it’s like checking if another branch will snap while still holding another - sounds careful but that’s not the point - it’s just that you should sit on it (stability) instead of jumping trees after you already commited to one of them and made a nest on it, you will break all of the branches (other people) and you will end up on the ground anyway - alone, who wants to be with a cheater? honestly - rapist will always stay rapist even if he won’t rape again and so is the cheating person - they might change but fear will always be a part of their partner for sure, dating is like a competition for many, trying until you find the best match, always looking around, never warming up to anyone in case there’s a better opportunity, constant game that make us anxious, showing off you’re the best player among all and... you actually are a player in both of this word’s definitions, sadly What quality in a person do you fall in love with? it’s not a single separate thing but someone whole I believe, I tried to explain that to myself but it’s very hard, there are some traits I might like more, go for, see as necessities but I’m unable to list them for now - maybe later/someday Do you find it difficult to admit that you are wrong, and why? I am - I don’t care about winning, I want truth and justice, I prefer to be right but without admitting I’m wrong that can’t happen Which would you prefer in a romantic partner: a dreamer or an achiever? dreamer, I dislike overly ambitious and workaholic people  What do you think are the two things that prevent people from realizing their dreams? money issues and health problems or time

So the world is dying to know the longest you’ve ever been on an airplane. 0 hours

Speaking of airplanes, can you sleep on them easily or no? no idea

So if I were to touch the place you last itched, would it be awkward? sorta

Have you ever come close to drowning? it was close in my opinion

Is the window in this room currently open or closed? closed

Is your phone fully charged right now? it is indeed

If you gave yourself a symbol (ex: star) to represent you, it would be…? not sure

Combine your two favorite animals. What kind of animal do you get? raccoon + elephant?

If I gave you a box of chocolates, which would you hope to get? I prefer something else than a box of chocolates

Have you ever caught your clothes on fire before? omg luckily not 

Are you any good at improv? been told

Do you have any special handshakes with friends? I don’t have... friends :x

Are you better at writing fiction or nonfiction? I’m good at both but I prefer fiction

How many times does the letter ’t’ occur in your full name? once

Last song you heard? Crystal Castles - Suffocation Reason you last threw up? meds withdrawal How many pairs of flip flops do you own? zero Do you ever pick up pennies for good luck? I pick up all coins that I find and give them to my dad Something you wear all the time that you’d feel naked without? panties

If you have younger siblings, how old were you when your siblings were born? not applicable Would you ever pick up gum from the ground and eat it? hell no Have you ever gotten stitches? nope

Think back to the last thing you drank. Did you drink it using a straw? I didn’t Is the sun shining? it’s almost midnight  Where did you go today? shopping Have you ever taken a survey while under the influence of drugs or alcohol? I don’t drink or take illegal drugs Where will you be in an hour? in my bed Is anyone irritating you? not atm unless I can count myself  Have your parents ever threatened to throw your things away because your room was messy? sorta Is your shirt pink? it’s mostly white Are you going to do more surveys? it’s late and I’m commited to finish this one Who is the most complicated person in your life right now? ... me? Have you ever video chatted with someone you met online? yep Are you hungry or thirsty right now? thirsty Do you own a pair of gumboots? eww, gross Have you ever worked somewhere where you had to clean the toilets? I might  Do you rate people’s attractiveness on a scale of 1-10? rating 1-10 is very hard for me Is there anything that you could cry about right now? shitload of reasons When was the last time you used Facebook? today like every other day Do you have a PO Box or does your mail get sent straight to your house? our house How many vowels are in your street name? 4 Did you share baths with your siblings/cousins when you were a child? I did not Have you ever been a member of an online dating site?  couple Do you know what your neighbours even look like? obvi Do you put ketchup on your fries? yuk

What color was the last swimsuit you wore? uh oh I should check that in my photo album in pics from middle school 

Is your dream job attainable? they ain’t

Have you read a newspaper today? we don’t buy/read newspapers

Do you have to go to school or work tomorrow? I’m done with school and am unemployed

Have you ever been to a drive-in theatre? no

Have you ever taken classes for a musical instrument? guitar

Have you ever been on vacation with someone other than your family? camp

Do you live with your parents? still

Are there any embarrassing school pictures of you anywhere in your house? there are

What moment in your life have you been most scared? constantly now last half year

Do you have any exes you can’t stand anymore? What happened to cause you to feel that way about them? long story

Do you ever make your own surveys, or just take them? I make them but barely ever

Are you more of a phone or a computer person? computer

Do you like to cook, or do you prefer when other people cook for you? prefer them to cook for me 

How old do you think you’ll be when you move out on your own? hope that this will happen soon 

Do you have a job? If so, where do you work? If not, do you want one? I need one

Have you ever ripped your pants in public? even recently 

Have you ever thought someone was talking to you, but it turned out they were on the phone? Did you play it off? possibly

Do you know anybody that has severe allergies? can we not talk about it?...

Who was the last person you slow danced with? my gf

Do you ever ride the city bus? How much does it cost you? often, nothing as I’m disabled

Do you say ‘like’ a lot? used to

Do you scream out the answers while watching game shows on TV? at times I did

Do you ever go into photobooths? yay!

What bill do you hate paying the most? I’d hate paying rent as it’s idiotically high

What’s the best place to eat a romantic dinner? everywhere can be romantic with a right person

What was your first car? none yet

Favorite guilty pleasure? personal

What celeb do you think resembles you best? basing on look? Cole Sprouse or Maisie Williams but with Juno Temple body

Who from high school would you like to run in to? hmm...

Start a new career or relationship? just get a job as I’m taken

Are any of your toes connected? I don’t have webbed toes

What was the last thing you dreamed about? running from the police... w klapkach

What color is your bedroom carpet? no carpet Have you ever had a black and white cat? all black Would you rather have an STD or share a bed with Michael Jackson? life chose for me and honestly this is probably the first time I’m happy about it Do you have any wallpaper in your house? I wish How many pairs of underwear do you own? lots of panties but not enough bras Who was your primary/elemantary school’s most popular girl? E.O. and A.M. Would you like to learn to play the harp? meh Are your feet ticklish? very and I hate that Do you have a black dog? it’s partially black Who has the prettiest toes, that you know of? feet are disgusting  What’s your least favorite season? winter

Do you enjoy walks? sure Can you roll your tongue? I can Would you eat a live spider for one million dollars? gimme Would you forgive someone for cheating? hard to tell Have you seen A Clockwork Orange? not interested Do you like to read? occasionally re you a grumpy person? often Do you like cotton candy? never tried and don’t wanna Rap or pop? pop What’s the weirdest flavor of ice cream you’ve tried? rose, amazing! Love or lust? love Do you remember lyrics easily? am I the only one who don’t? :(

My Top BL online stories (part 1)

Warning: There will be very naughty scenes 

1.  I never knew the World was this Bright

Theme: Online Gaming, School/College Life

Synopsis:

An Lian never thought he would make friends online when he started playing Red Dragon Quest for the first time. But as it turned out, he finds more than a friend... He finds a husband!

Little does An Lian know, this 'husband' in game is much closer to him in real life than he first suspects...

At the same time, in the real world, An Lian encounters a man named Jian Chen. An Lian remains oblivious to Jian Chen's advances until it is too late, and he is already too deep in the lion's den.

My thoughts:

Very Fluffy, some angst, it really makes the world bright. The MC is such a cinnamon roll while the ML is so protective of MC. Very cute couple

Side couple is super cute too. It was a nice surprise. Supportive friends FTW

2. A Lotus Born of Mud

Theme: Transmigration, Cultivation, Disciple x Master

Trigger Warning: contains sensitive themes such as child abuse, rape and self-harm

Synopsis:

"Lu ShiZun... I like you."

"I like you too XiaoYin."

"... My kind of like is where we'd tumble in bed all day all night kind of like ShiZun..."

*ferociously runs in the opposite direction

...........................................

 Lu BiMing was born in the modern ages. However due to orphaned and adopted by cruel people at a young age, his life was as miserable as any life could get. When he finally escapes looking to start a new life he slips up and drowns.

 Whilst in JiangHu lives a man has money and reputation.  He is murdered... by drowning...

 Lu BiMing's life changes after he wakes up in another body. Now he really has literally found a new life where no one knows of his past, his secrets or his fears. However, with a new body comes responsibility too and he soon discovers that twisted secrets exist in this world also.

 He goes out of character,

 He bends the rules,

 But most of all, he's caught the eye of a troubling disciple...

My thoughts:

The MC is very naive and adorable but he’s not weak. He can protect himself. He’s just very dense and unable to realize how attractive he is. He has a very sad life but he still have the strength to fight and make himself and other people he care about happy. 

ML is like a little lost puppy without his master. He can be sexy yet cute at the same time. He is very possesive to the point that he’s showing yandere-ish actions. He’s still sane tho. 

The story itself is very detailed. The characters aren’t one dimensional. Full of gray area. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry and in some cases you might get turned on

3.  I Love You from Alpha to Omega

Theme: Fantasy, Werewolves/Werecat

Trigger: contains scenes of abuse, PTSD

Ezra believed he would never find his mate, until he met Blair. While Ezra was away, training to become an Alpha strong enough to lead his pack, his mother and father adopted a new son into their home. When Ezra returnd home, he worried about competition from his new brother, Blair, for both his title and his parent's love and affection. It comes as a complete surprise to him that Blair is interested in neither. The small, skittish shifter is just a little neko, and above all, Ezra's mate.

    Ezra becomes concerned when his parents, the current Alpha and Luna of his pack, explain to him what little they know about Blair's devastating past. At first Ezra believes his only obstacle is to get his mate to accept him, but as Blair's previous life comes to light, blindsiding the couple, Ezra realizes he may have bit off more than he could chew. Ezra hopes his unconditional love for Blair will guide him in his quest to avenge his mate's honor. Follow Ezra and Blair as together they learn to trust in each other and develop a relationship unlike any other.

"I love you."

"How Much?" He breathlessly questioned.

"From A to Z, from Alpha to Omega." I confessed sincerely.

My Thoughts:

Very sensitive themes but you can really see that love exists between the main characters. It’s a little slow burn romance due to Blair’s past but you can really see how Ezra tries to become patient and understanding for his mate. I like that this story involves other kinds of love such as family/ parental love. Ezra’s parents are just the best. So pure.

2MOONS (Phayo/MingKit/ForthBeam) :

1. Last Descendant 

Theme: Fantasy, Magic, Kinda Avatar: Last Airbender inspired

Summary/ Description:

My name is Wayo Daichapanya. I am a non-magi. I can't seem to awaken my elemental powers. I envy my brother Ming who has awakened his earth magic since he was 5. He is going to go to a college in neutral lands so he can join the Wizards Rumble, a tournament of magic users. He is a powerful earth magic user, I believe he will win. I decided to come along with him to that college because I am quite attached to my brother. I always feel safe when I am with him, I can't imagine going to a different college.

I feel like someone has been stalking me in the college, but I can't seem to find who it is. Who is stalking me?

My thoughts:

Wayo is so such a cinnamon roll. He’s so lovable and innocent. Phana is such a bad ass here and also a possessive perv. 

TONS of MINGYO BROTHERLY cuteness!!!!!!!!

Mingkit is such a cute couple. Literally Fiery Kit and the adorable puppy Ming its just so funny

ForthBeam= trust issues storyline, mostly Beam’s. A very romantic Forth here. 

2. Two Planets

Summary/ Description:

He takes off his mask and what I see next is beyond awesome. Perfect face! He is so handsome. There is no way he is from Earth. Well, he is from Venus. His name is Phana, from the royal family Kongthanin.

My name is Wayo, from the royal family Panitchayasawad. Both of us got chosen as our respective planet's representative to enroll in the Intergalactic School. There will be other students from other planets too!

It has been my dream to know about other planets! But wait. Why is P'Pha holding my hands like this? This is in the school! This is embarrassing! *facepalms*

This story tells about Phana and Wayo, along with their friends from other planets in the Intergalactic School. Phana is from Venus, while Wayo is from Earth. What is about to bloom between the two planets?

My thoughts:

PREPARE TO DIE FROM EXTREME FLUFF AND CUTENESS. Sweet and loving yet possessive and perverted Phana X Innocent and lovable Prince Wayo

I just kept smiling while reading every chapter. THEY ARE BOTH CINNAMON ROLLS HERE! PLUS Phana is NOT A PLAYBOY here! He’s a virgin here.

There will be cameos

3.  Howling at the Moons

Theme: Fantasy,Supernatural, Werewolves, Omegaverse

Summary/ Description:

Yo is a young werewolf who wants nothing more than to experience life. To live, laugh, and love beyond the restrictions he has always known. Will college be his chance to do that?

 In a world where werewolves exist but are still 'in the closet' so to speak, how will our 6 boys handle their lives and loves while hiding one small secret from the world?

My Thoughts:

Very sweet loving couples. Full of Suprises. Cute funny scenes between the side couples (MingKit/ ForthBeam). MINGYO FRIENDSHIP FTW!!!!!! Very smexy scenes. 

4.  Taking a Bite Out of the Moons

Theme: Fantasy, Supernatural, Werewolves, Vampires, Fae

Trigger: School Bullying

Summay/Description:

Wayo is a simple human boy trapped in a lonely little world, until he makes friends with Ming and Forth, werewolves from the local pack. What adventures will they experience on their journey from secondary school students to college kids? And what awaits them at college?

 In a world where werewolves, vampires, and Fae exist and are 'out of the closet' so to speak, can our six boys find happiness and love?

My Thoughts:

Tons of twists and turns. Some light smexy threesome scenes but not all the way. There were actually scenes that made me cry. There will be character developments especially Wayo, Kit and of course Beam. 

CRACK/ GHOSTSHIPS

1. TEARS OF THE MOON (Forthyo)

The storyline is similar to 2moons but with Forth as lead

Summary/Description:

Ming being Ming  told me surely I had misunderstood and I so wanted it to be true, so I gladly accepted this point of view  although I knew without a shadow of doubt that I  had not misheard neither did I misunderstand.  That  night I chose to lie to myself  since I was not  prepared  to let go of P' Pha.

My Thoughts:

Seriously ship Forthyo here. Healthy relationship!!!

2.  Circus Freak (Mingyo)

Theme: Vampire, School Life

My Thoughts:

Sweet, lovely. Classic Besties turned Lovers with a twist

3. Guardian Angel (Mingyo)

Theme: School life

Summary/Description:

Ming blinks. This is this frist day in his new school and he has to witness a kid being hanged upside down in his one feet up the tree.

A thick glasses are dropped on the grass.

"Hey, do you know where the principal office is?" Ming asked him.

"Uhm. I want to show you but my sight is no use without my glasses." He said. His braces is colored blue.

Ming get the glasses from the grass and put it in the boy's eyes. Still with him hanging upside down.

He blinks several times to get used of the sudden clear sight. "Wow. You are handsome."

Ming blinks several times. "Wha...t...."

"There...." the boy points at one of the dirrection.

Ming blinks. "Why don't you just show me?" He said.

"I would like to, but if you haven't notice yet, I am hanged upside down here." He said. "Beside, you better not seen with me. You'll get trouble."

"Like what?"

"This."

Ming blinks. "Yeah... maybe my trouble would be much bigger than that. But hell with that." He puts down his back pack and then climbs up the tree.

Not long after, the boy with glasses and braces hit the ground with a loud thump sound.

Ming laughs. "You are so silly."

My Thoughts:

Bad boy/ Naughty Ming x Openly gay and sassy Wayo. Daddy kinks

This is all for now. Sorry all of them are on wattpad. the ones from other sites such as novelupdates are still ongoing so i couldn’t complete them yet

i’ll post more once i finished some more and depends if you guys want me to post more of these. 

I still haven’t finished tons of webnovels and fanfic coz they are either still updating or i got really distracted. ANY WAY PLEASE SUPPORT THE AUTHORS THEY DESERVE LOVE! 

let’s talk and discuss more love!!!

why doesn’t the current employment system work?

easy, it’s a half-assed one-solution-fits-all approach made by rich people who have NEVER used the employment search system.

-

How does it work?

You want centrelink? You get assigned a job-search centre, there’s always 4-5 in even small towns now. It’s a lucrative business.

You’re told ‘search for 20-40 jobs per month’ based on your area. They have to be jobs you could reasonably do (one or two assholes made sure the whole system was tightened bc they’d apply for things they had no qualifications for). 

These are entered online, on a special governmental site. Failure to locate the right amount gets you a strike, or more than one.

Which is hard because there are only so many jobs in smaller towns, right?

So let’s say you have no luck, you hand in the 20 for that fortnight, and ‘report’ online to centrelink that you are following the rules.

They also make you do mandatory courses such as the 2-day ‘Resume Writing Course’ that you can do up to twice in 6 months. It’s as stupid as it sounds, and you learn nothing but that you hate the place.

Also, 3-day mandatory ‘Communication with People’. How to talk to people. Literally. 3 days of your life gone. Gee, wish I’d done some sort of degree around literally talking to people and using analysis... hmmm... 

They do not Recognise Prior Learning, at all. Because each person they make attend gets them more and more money.

-

New rules allow for them to identify a job you HAVE to apply for -even if you must write a new resume and cover letter. Which, in some cases, is a little fair.  Maybe you’re using one from years ago.

New rules can make them demand you call the HR of a certain place in front of them, to prove your resume went in, and to ask about the position. Of course, this will slap you on the Hell No list, but at least they’re satisfied.

New rules allow them to make you change your existing resume -e.g. they can demand you remove your degree/qualifications to make you more attractive to retail employers (always wary of taking on someone who might move on quickly).

That only works for 6 months these days.

- - - 

After 6 months, they send you on a Work-for-the-Dole assignment to a local charity.

They’re supposed to do risk assessments, and follow up on allegations of groping weirdoes and pedophilia (looking at you, Salvation Army*). But they don’t. [ *that person who did it was literally the Community Member of the Year until the truth of what the local SA was covering up came to light. Fucking creep of a man, so many flags that Jesus absolved him of.]

That nonsense injured two members of my family directly, as well as others; at the same place, at different times, and both were deemed ‘our fault’. Despite that the first incident involved an unqualified asshole making a teenage boy hold a fridge, then deliberately dropping the truck tray fast so it yanked the ligaments in the kid’s shoulder so badly it took 6-12 months to heal with physiotherapy.

And the second time, a bookshelf held up with STICKY-tape was broken by a customer, and fell off slamming into my knees and feet, causing untold agony... resulting in a fractured patella in one knee and severe bruising/clicking/weird shit that persists even a year and a half later... but that was my fault.

-----------------------

In short, each person is assigned up to 55 hours per fortnight that they have to undertake with a charity of some formation. OR ROADWORK - they can also make you do roadwork. Like they tried to do to the just-healed teenage boy the minute his medical exemption period was up, even though he couldn’t raise his arm all the way yet. It’s Making Money, not Helping People Find Jobs.

They also made an app, that the person attending MUST download (even if you have to delete just about every single other thing on the cheap phone to make room for it).

It’s called Jobapp or some shit. Basically, when you get there the manager or head volunteer (often tech illiterate) HAS to print a QR code for you, and only you.

You sign into the app, this takes a while bc it’s not well designed and cuts out often. Finally, you find the hard-to-locate-and-ambiguously-named part where you can ‘sign in’ as being at your ‘activity’.

If you’re there all day, and you will be, there are Two Codes.

You scan them to separate locations in the app. And boom, you’re registered as there. It only takes one missed QR code or app failure to land you in shit, though.

And then you spend all day cleaning, on the till, arguing with people over op shop items bc they feel certain prices are too high even if it’s less than a third the real price. And you’re not allowed to sit or chill or anything... unless you’re a volunteer. They can get away with murder.

So that goes on for six months, slowly draining the will to live from your bones.

All the while, you still have to do the 20-40 jobs things and find time for their Training Modules that you already did but hey, you’re a moneymaker. Sometimes they will NOT count the training days towards your Total 55hours per fortnight, so you lose the one free day a week you had...

---------------

It sucks... but I think the other thing we should mention is that this doesn’t really exclude any jobseekers.

Disabled? Elderly? Medical Issues? Can’t speak english very well? Other issue?

Get in there. We get paid to supervise your activity!

Like, there are a lot of people doing job seeking activities who are unfit for the position they are forced into. For many reasons.

-----------------

The thing I found laughable was that they could apply for you, without your knowledge, and if that resulted in an interview you HAD to go. If they feel you tanked the interview, they can penalise you...

There are ways to tank an interview, though. Trust me.  Especially for telemarketer interviews, just have an awkward phone manner, like you’re trying but it’s Weird. And boom, no. [Not that there’s anything wrong with that job, but they signed me up for it without my permission and some dangerous clients worked there, I would not have been safe, they didn’t care tho].

Also, you can’t apply for certain positions for someone with a degree. Our ability is measured in the way we respond to the questions and assessment requests... you can force us to apply to them, but trying to write in for us is just ridiculous. 

They might also call and call and call anyone on your applied-for list that they directed you to apply for... which of course, can tank your chances. Very annoying.

And if you get a job, on your own merit, they take credit for it immediately. I assume there’s a bonus or something.

- - - - - 

The agency I was sent to, MaxEmployment, was actually THROWN OUT OF ANOTHER STATE FOR COMMITTING FRAUD AGAINST THE GOVERNMENT.

So naturally, QLD said ‘yeah, let’s have that one’.

M.E. allegedly used to claim they had held mass training events with 80+ people every few weeks, doing those awful little courses listed above.  Except, on inspection by confused governmental officials..,. they discovered the room would barely hold 5-6 people including a trainer. Therefore, fraud.

Also, M.E. has failed to catch fake-ads (resulting in free 2-hour work ‘trials’ for a certain cafe that went over a year, fraud) and even sent an unaccompanied 15 year old girl to a fucking BROTHEL after identifying a clearly-not-for-an-admin ad for ‘an admin’ at that location.

IT’s always MONEY.

--------------------

If you are in charge of the poor, the ill, the desperate... then it should not be for money incentives. You should get a flat wage and that’s it.

Why? Because then people who are actually able to do the job, and willing to help people, will do it. Not just people who see dollar signs when they look at the tired, the unemployed and the ill.

And they need to actually fire bad people.

Let me tell you about this woman I had to deal with in a 6 month break from my fucking uni degree due to illness. Automatically, they threw me into job seeking.  I didn’t have a voice for like 2 months, but that didn’t matter.

This huge, hulking, rotund potato of a woman, balding ranga and a face as mean as a bulldog’s arsehole... was my caseworker person. She was a nightmare.

I would find 20 jobs, and hand in the sheet, she would yell at me, that I was being smart and she wouldn’t accept that. I once applied for nearly 65 jobs in one fortnight out of desperation, because she kept having my centrelink cut off without warning if I refused to complete another sheet.

The other caseworkers never stopped her. The manager would not hear my complaints or concerns. She could do what she wanted.

And she knew I could not stop her. The one thing about the situation that kept me apart form others there was that, if I absolutely couldn’t take it, my parental unit said we would ‘manage’ until I went back to uni the next year. Others were unable to do that, and so, this absolute cunt of a woman... held sway.

She had no class, no charm and no people skills. She screamed at the top of her lungs at a tiny asian lady who a) didn’t have a great grasp on english at the time, and b) did not understand all the big words this self-important ranga was using just to sound intelligent.

Apparently the solution to ‘I do not understand’ is raise your voice, to screaming, and get angry. NONE of her colleagues even looked up at her.  Jesus, if one of my colleagues was yelling like that I’d have dragged them out of the room by their fucking hair, like what the HELL was that about.

Was she stopped or fired? No. Was she transferred to some unsuspecting town? Yeah.

I don’t trust organisations who will not admit they hired the wrong person, and fire them. It means they’re hiding shit.

--------------

TL;DR - The whole system is a disaster.

They claim more people are employed, but they also count people on those mandatory work-for-the-dole things, which skews the unemployment number to less than it is.

It is exhausting to deal with and its no wonder so many fucking people are so depressed death seems like the only solution.

And it was all thanks to a handful of people rorting the system; the idiots up top went into red-alert levels of panic and upended the system to punish people.

AND THAT’S NOT EVEN FUCKING TALKING ABOUT THE NEW BASICS CARD SYSTEM

which is nonsense

sure, limit what people can get to groceries and certain stores, including op shops or whatevs. can’t get smokes or alcohol on the cards...

have to have ID for the cards...

but like, you think people won’t find ways to get the smokes, drugs and alcohol they want? you’ve just ensured that they either pawn their things, or do degrading acts to get those things...

so give yourselves a moralistic high-five, people who decided this system was a great idea (primarily bc they and their family/social circle will never need to use it), because you’ve cause d so many more problems than you solved...

Stolen from gf @lionel-del-rey

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

smol cousin at some family function a while back.

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Neither? 

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My gf

4. Are you easy to get along with? Fuck no lmao

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? I have no doubt that they would try

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Funny, kind, down to earth people are cool

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? I’m about to purchase a plane ticket for my gf so I severely hope we’re together by then lmao

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? ur mum

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Only if it makes the person I’m talking to uncomfortable

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My dad. I guess???

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “what the fuck do you want for chrimbus, you little bitch?”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? Oh no I don’t know gonna pull these out my ass real quick Black Irish by The Devil Makes Three Almost Blue by Chet Baker Desperado by The Eagles Stillborn (acoustic) by Black Label Society 512 by Lamb of God

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? idk? 

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yes

15. What good thing happened this summer? I got to visit a friend in Texas. Other than that, my summer went by in a big shitty blur.

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Not for all the money in the world

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? Ye

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Nop

19. Do you like bubble baths? Ye

20. Do you like your neighbors? I don’t dislike them. I don’t speak spanish, so we haven’t talked much.

21. What are you bad habits? I stress myself out over little things too often

22. Where would you like to travel? Ireland would be cool, but I definitely could never go there. Outside of that, idk, anywhere is cool

23. Do you have trust issues? oh yes

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Eating

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? My chest or my neck

26. What do you do when you wake up? Check my phone

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? I think its a fine how it is

28. Who are you most comfortable around? My friend Ari I guess

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? yes

30. Do you ever want to get married? wow what an awkward question to have on something my gf is for sure going to see (yes)

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? ye

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? Oh, idk

33. Spell your name with your chin. dickhead

34. Do you play sports? What sports? Not any more, but I used to play Football (American) and boxing 

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Tv

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Nah. Well yeah, but they figured it out eventually lmao

37. What do you say during awkward silences? “wow this got awkward”

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? Mark Ruffalo

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Nerd stores (y’know, where nerds gather to play cards and dnd and stuff, occasionally comics are also there) and music stores. I’d spend all day in guitar center if no one stopped me.

40. What do you want to do after high school? Already out, and lemme tell you I’m already not doing what I wanted to do

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Most people. A few people definitely deserve nothing less than a life time of suffering.

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? Nothing, or something. I’m quiet most of the time.

43. Do you smile at strangers? I think I do but I have the resting bitch face big time so I mostly just look slightly less mad at people in public

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? The ocean would be fantastic

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Mr Socks won’t SHUT THE FUCK UP

46. What are you paranoid about? oh, y’know, most things

47. Have you ever been high? Oh yes

48. Have you ever been drunk? frequently 

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? yes, but not because i’m embarrassed, just don’t want to upset anyone

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Black

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Nah. Careful what you wish for, right? Don’t want to say that and then wake up to find I’m somehow an even bigger piece of shit.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? Wish I were in better shape, but I’m working on that so

53. Favourite makeup brand? Don’t wear it, so my favorite is whatever my gf asks for lmao

54. Favourite store? Guitar Center. lemme obnoxiously test pedals all day

55. Favourite blog? dunno

56. Favourite colour? Red. a certain shade of blue is pretty good too.

57. Favourite food? Anything featuring potatoes 

58. Last thing you ate? a fuckin 1/4 cup of cheese. my diet has been weird recently.

59. First thing you ate this morning? Nothing yet, but I have designs on some tacos

60. Ever won a competition? For what? ye, a few. i hate bragging so im not going to go into detail, but i used to actually be good at things.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? Yep. suspended two or three times for getting into fights, one time for accidentally bringing a knife to school. weirdly, the girl that decided to pull the thing out of my pocket got in no trouble at all.

62. Been arrested? For what? No, but boi have i come close

63. Ever been in love? i am, at this moment, very in love

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? Not really much a story? It was an awkward childhood kiss.

65. Are you hungry right now? Yes, very. waiting on me uncle tho

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? don’t really have tumblr friends

67. Facebook or Twitter? Fb

68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr for art, twitter for memes

69. Are you watching tv right now? nah

70. Names of your bestfriends? Ari, zach, mr socks

71. Craving something? What? Oh y’know things

72. What colour are your towels? Got turquoise, black, blue, purple, white. 

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? two

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Nah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? Got a few plush pokemon, i guess that counts?

75. Favourite animal? Really like bears

76. What colour is your underwear? N/A

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? oh, uh, cookie dough? oreo? orange sherbet? can’t decide.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? N/A

80. What colour pants? look if the last two clothing questions didn’t tip you off, i’m naked. are you happy now?

81. Favourite tv show? oh, idk. haven’t really had the interest in shows since i got super depressed like a year ago lmao

82. Favourite movie? i guess kung pow?

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER PICK 2? 

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Mean girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? that chick that made out with a hot dog that one time. big mood.

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? The stoner turtle

87. First person you talked to today? My gf

88. Last person you talked to today? My uncle

89. Name a person you hate? just one? nah.

90. Name a person you love? my gf (duh) all these friends i met on the internet, and some of my family i guess

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? so, so many people. 

92. In a fight with someone? like, currently? how would i be doing this?

93. How many sweatpants do you have? don’t wear sweats

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? a couple

95. Last movie you watched? uhhhhhhhhh something shitty on netflix, probs

96. Favourite actress? oof uh, idk. 

97. Favourite actor? also dunno

98. Do you tan a lot? got them irish genes, i burn

99. Have any pets? Mr. Socks, the best cat in the world and i will fight anyone who disagrees. 

100. How are you feeling? Cold

101. Do you type fast? Nope

102. Do you regret anything from your past? Not really. If they didn’t happen, i wouldn’t be where i am now

103. Can you spell well? dubya eee ell ell. fuck you.

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? kinda? define past.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? ye

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? i would hope not, but maybe

107. Have you ever been on a horse? ye

108. What should you be doing? going to the store

109. Is something irritating you right now? always

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? YES

111. Do you have trust issues? Yes

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? an ex, probably

113. What was your childhood nickname? didn’t really have a nickname

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yep

115. Do you play the Wii? I have a wiiu, but i don’t really play it much. its mostly the netflix machine now

116. Are you listening to music right now? Autumn Leaves by Chet Baker

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Fucking yes

118. do you like chinese food> YE BOI

119. Favourite book? don’t know

120. Are you afraid of the dark? Nah

121. Are you mean? I think so. others say different. its weird, man

122. Is cheating ever okay? in a relationship? no. in a video game to give your character a giant bobble head? absolutely.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? the trick is to not wear white shoes

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? No lmao

125. Do you believe in true love? as opposed to fake love? i guess???

126. Are you currently bored? ye

127. What makes you happy? knowing that others are happy

128. Would you change your name? nah

129. What your zodiac sign? taurus

130. Do you like subway? not compared to my other sub options

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? i don’t know. she’s married, so like...what the fuck how 

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my dad, i guess

133. Favourite lyrics right now? I've held the hand of God and I've sang the Devil's song And when it comes my time no tears are gonna fall But some will light the fire and some will mourn the one Left longing for the ire of, of their departed son.

134. Can you count to one million? ain’t got that kinda time, fam

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? I don’t really lie? I think i just say dumb shit and people take me seriously 

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed

137. How tall are you? 5′5. I’m a manlet.

138. Curly or Straight hair? no preference

139. Brunette or Blonde? brunette

140. Summer or Winter? Winter

141. Night or Day? Night

142. Favourite month? idk, december i guess because i have a mandatory week off work,

143. Are you a vegetarian? I wish, I don’t have the willpower.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Dark chocolate

145. Tea or Coffee? tea. coffee is more of a tool for me? gotta wake up, tea is just good.

146. Was today a good day? dunno yet

147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers

148. What’s your favourite quote? don’t really remember quotes

149. Do you believe in ghosts? Kinda

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“As I approached the northern cliffs where I’d find the Serpent’s Sanctum, I could see the soaring towers of Skyreach off to my right.”

lets get personal.

i know this is supposed to be an ask meme but i’m fucking bored & no one ever sends me them, so.  also i’m kinda pissy rn unfortunately so forgive pls some of my answers lol

01: 6 of the songs you listen to most?:  idk.  mostly i listen to everything on random anymore, and only in my car.  the only song i’ve listened to on repeat recently has been ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga. 02: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?:  speaking of which, lady gaga. 03: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.:  the only book near me would be all the books, as in my bookshelf.  unless you count my kindle, in which case there would be no line 17 because of the font size.  sorry. 04: What do you think about most?:  idk.  whatever my current obsession is i guess. 05: What does your latest text message from someone else say?:  “And you don't have to cook it”. 06: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?:  with.  i don’t like being naked and don’t understand those who do.  also i get cold. 07: What’s your strangest talent?:  i don’t have talents. 08: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence):  are soft and beautiful.  meh, have to earn my trust. 09: Ever had a poem or song written about you?:  a song, yes. 10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?:  a very long time.  it’s not a thing i ever do lol. 11: Do you have any strange phobias?:  i don’t think so.  my phobias are pretty standard. 12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?:  when i was a kid, yeah.  plenty.  once my parents had to hold me down and tweeze a chewed up wad of juicy fruit out of my nose.  i fucking love the smell of that gum.  three year old me may have been stupid but, hey.  i was being economical.  also i blame it on my parents for, you know, giving a fucking toddler some gum. 13: What’s your religion?:  don’t have one.  former christian, which is gross.  don’t indoctrinate children, please and thanks. 14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?:  walking to or from my car.  that’s about it.  :/ 15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?:  behind.  no one deserves to see my face.  rip to everyone who sees me in person on a regular basis. 16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?:  jars of clay, jimmy eat world, the elms. 17: What was the last lie you told?:  that i’m not in debt lmao.  the only time i’ve lied to my psychiatrist :/ 18: Do you believe in karma?:  no but sometimes i wish i did.  so many people deserve their comeuppance. 19: What does your URL mean?:  doesn’t really mean anything, he’s a character from the flash. 20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?:  all sorts of things?  and idk. 21: Who is your celebrity crush?:  lady gaga, angelina jolie, carlos valdes, idk if shane madej is a ‘celebrity’ but him, brie larson, michael sheen... idk, i don’t really have “crushes” but those are the first ppl to come to mind. 22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?:  nope.  and no thank you. 23: How do you vent your anger?:  lol. 24: Do you have a collection of anything?:  funko pops?  but not seriously.  i mean.  i have a lot of them bc i love a lot of characters and there are some pretty fuckin dope funkos.  but it’s not my goal in life to have a huge collection or anything.  at least i can say i have less than a hundred of them lol.  (less than 75.) 25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?:  ew, neither.  but if i had to choose, phone.  bc, you know.  my face. 26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?:  lmfao no.  i mean, i’m better than the person i used to be, that’s for sure.  (see:  indoctrinated as a child, including your typical conservative bullshit like racism for starters.) 27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?:  so many.  i have misophonia.  and people chewing + mouth sounds is definitely a big one.  love?  idk???  music?  rain?  my cat’s cute lil meow? 28: What’s your biggest “what if”?:  what if my thyroid issues were discovered earlier on instead of a year or more after they started.  my childhood doctor was Not Great.  it took her two weeks to figure out i had a sinus infection.  i was in the fourth grade.  still bitter about both of those. 29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?:  no, ghosts aren’t real.  aliens yes.  not the stereotypical ones, but in a “given the size of the universe it’s literally impossible that we’re the only life out there” way. 30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.:  right, the cat.  left, air. 31: Smell the air. What do you smell?:  nothing?  it’s my house/room, so to me it smells like nothing. 32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?:  uh... i’ve no idea? 33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?:  west, obviously. 34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?:  no such thing as ‘opposite’ gender.  of a different gender, though?  lady gaga. 35: To you, what is the meaning of life?:  who the fucking fuck knows.  literally know one knows, though tbh.  they just think they do. 36: Define Art.:  lmfao how would i know.  i don’t have a creative bone in my body so i should be the last person to comment on the subject. 37: Do you believe in luck?:  nope.  i hope it’s obvious by now that i don’t believe in fictional things. 38: What’s the weather like right now?:  cool.  cloudy.  typical oregon winter weather.  i want rain tho :( 39: What time is it?:  3:04am. 40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?:  yes.  and yes, several times.  three.  two totaled cars.  the last one is the only one that was actually my fault, though.  driving too close after it rained.  don’t do it, folks. 41: What was the last book you read?:  the diviners by libba bray.  currently reading a short history of nuclear folly by rudolph herzog.  fascinating, but kind of  depressing af. 42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?:  no. 43: Do you have any nicknames?:  hal (to a very select few bc 99% of the time i hate it, so fuck you if you call me this without permission), hals, hallie bird, hallie strawberry. 44: What was the last film you saw?:  i honestly don’t know.  haven’t done a whole lot of movie watching lately.  maybe the fall (2006).  (please watch this movie, it’s so gorgeous and lovely.) 45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?:  i’ve never had a serious injury.  well.  i take that back, i guess.  in my first car accident i was stopped and rear-ended at like, 40mph.  so i’ve had back issues since i was 18.  usually it’s fine but sometimes it’s bad and sometimes i can set it off really easily.  idk if that counts as “serious”, though.  lots of people have back problems. 46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?:  i don’t think so? 47: Do you have any obsessions right now?:  i guess buzzfeed unsolved and watcher.  and ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga lol.  good omens, as usual. 48: What’s your sexual orientation?:  asexual. 49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?:  yes.  thankfully only a few (that i know of, anyway). 50: Do you believe in magic?:  no. 51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?:  yuuup.  they deserve it. 52: What is your astrological sign?:  taurus. 53: Do you save money or spend it?:  spend it :||  every paycheck i tell myself i’ll be better at saving it, but............ 54: What’s the last thing you purchased?:  preordered chromatica by lady gaga. 55: Love or lust?:  if i had to choose, love.  lust and all that stuff is gross. 56: In a relationship?:  nope.  shocker, i know.  (this is sarcasm.  it is no shocker to anyone as to why i’m single.) 57: How many relationships have you had?:  just the one. 58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?:  nope. 59: Where were you yesterday?:  work on my day off for a staff meeting, and then my psychiatrists’ office. 60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?:  a few things, yes. 61: Are you wearing socks right now?:  yes.  almost always. 62: What’s your favourite animal?:  cats, then birds.  mice are p adorable, too.  i miss having them.  i haven’t had mice since middle school or early high school i think :(  i’d love more but my current cat would definitely try to eat them... same with a bird.  i’ll probably never have a bird :( 63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?:  be sarcastic and love stupid puns and bad jokes? 64: Where is your best friend?:  one is in ohio and the other is in massachusetts. 65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.:  no idea lol.  i haven’t been on here much recently, and i’m never caught up anyway.  and i don’t usually pay attention to who is posting/reblogging. 66: What is your heritage?:  mostly german.  the rest is other typical white stuff that i can’t remember.  some irish?  either way idc. 67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?:  uh, rewatching some buzzfeed unsolved for the 100th time?  and playing with my tamagotchi? 68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?:  he doesn’t exist so idc. 69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?:  nope.  also, Nice™. 70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?:  incredibly doubtful. 71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?:  go to work.  i love my job way too much.  i’d probably try to get someone’s attention if there was anyone around, and/or call animal services.  (there are no canals around here anyway and i don’t walk to work and ain’t gonna.) 72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?:  who tf knows, i hate this shit.  i’d really rather not think about it bc it stresses me out.  i probably wouldn’t tell very many people tho.  try to find someone to take my cat :(  i sure as shit wouldn’t leave her to my parents :(  and i wouldn’t want to leave her in a shelter.  she’s already done that once and it makes me too sad. 73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.:  trust.  you can’t have love without trust, though... 74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?:  ‘sweetness’ by jimmy eat world, ‘fade to grey’ by jars of clay, ‘thunderhead’ by the elms, ‘bad romance’ and ‘g*psy’ by lady gaga (latter is... i hate the name but the song is so fucking catchy, ugh), ‘torn’ by natalie imbruglia, ‘bring it all back’ by s club 7, ‘... baby one more time’ by britney spears, ‘where’s the love’ by hanson, ‘who do you think you are’ by the spice girls, ‘as long as you love me’ and ‘everybody (backstreet’s back)’ by the backstreet boys, ‘black balloon’ by goo goo dolls, ‘spark’ by tori amos, ‘last beautiful girl’ by matchbox twenty, ‘push it’ by garbage, ‘i want you’ by savage garden, ‘minority’ and ‘she’ and ‘basket case’ and ‘macy’s day parade’ by green day... how’s that lol. 75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?:  not giving out that kind of personal information lmao. 76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?:  i wouldn’t know. 77: How can I win your heart?:  you probably can’t.  idk anyway. 78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?:  sure, but lack of insanity is a better way to go.  don’t perpetuate the bullshit notion that you need to be suffering to create Great Art™. 79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?:  idk.  i haven’t made very many. 80: What size shoes do you wear?:  10 in women’s. 81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?:  i’m going to be cremated and you probably should be, too.  just don’t get embalmed, k? 82: What is your favourite word?:  fuck. 83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.:  ‘alone’ by heart. 84: What is a saying you say a lot?:  idk.  someone who spends time around me irl would have to tell me. 85: What’s the last song you listened to?:  ‘stupid love’ by lady gaga on repeat. 86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?:  blue.  then green, and in no particular order, black, grey, purple. 87: What is your current desktop picture?:  it’s boring, just the default mac catalina background lol.  i was having issues choosing a background and was getting way too fucking picky, so i just said ‘fuck it’ and have been using this one for months. 88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?:  donald trump. 89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?:  idk?  how much in debt i am?  lmao. 90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?:  assume i’m having a night terror or am hallucinating.  and be scared. 91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?:  hopefully teleportation. 92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?:  maybe when i met carlos valdes & got a picture with him.  he’s super sweet, is living sunshine, and gives amazing hugs. 93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?:  so many :/  idek where to start tbh. 94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?:  i’m sex-repulsed so no thank you.  also, gross question.  get a life. 95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?:  new zealand. 96: Do you have any relatives in jail?:  yes, my cousin bc he murdered my dad ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?:  no. 98: Ever been on a plane?:  many times. 99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?:  indigenous people aren’t history, they still exist.  shut the fuck up and listen to them.  build a time machine to go back in time and prevent colonisers.  just straight-up kill them, we deserve it.

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? a very sweet girl 2. Are you outgoing or shy? outgoing for the most part 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? um no one particularly atm 4. Are you easy to get along with? very 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? I would hope but I wouldn't get drunk so it's fine lol 6. What kind of people are you attracted to? can't begin to explain that..I just know it when I see it 7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? I doubt it but I don't try to figure out the future anymore. if somethings meant to be it happens 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? um.....   Mark Cuban XD XD XD 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? I wouldn't say that ha...i'm all for it lmaaoo 10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? ummm i think my mom 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? something lol 12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? be the one-dua lipa, temple-tonight alive, new rules-dua lipa,dusk til dawn-sia,falling-haim 13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? oh yessss 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? luck not really..in a sense i guess. miracles absolutely 15. What good thing happened this summer? uh honestly it's kinda a blur to me 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? absolutely 17. Do you think there is life on other planets? yes 18. Do you still talk to your first crush? no haha he was from elementary school 19. Do you like bubble baths? yaaaaaassssss 20. Do you like your neighbors? i don't know them 21. What are you bad habits? leaving drinks and bottles unfinished/out.. messy room.. too many things tbh 22. Where would you like to travel? soooo many places...anywhere...everywhere 23. Do you have trust issues? not really...I trust too easy 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? coming home from work..or going to bed lol 25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? stomach :( 26. What do you do when you wake up? wish I could go back to sleep 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? darker 28. Who are you most comfortable around? a few people 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? not really 30. Do you ever want to get married? maybe 31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? yes 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? uhhhh XD not really the threesome type but.. erm. lets just not lol 33. Spell your name with your chin. wutt 34. Do you play sports? What sports? hell no. 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? tv 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? um.. ya probably a couple times when i was younger but i'm usually pretty straight forward about it 37. What do you say during awkward silences? random shit 38. Describe your dream girl/guy? it'd take too long 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? target.. bath and body works.. publix.. hot topic.. vans.. 40. What do you want to do after high school? i'm outta school bitchess 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? usually 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? it depends. either i'm really tired or thinking about something/daydreaming or don't feel good 43. Do you smile at strangers? ya i get paid to every day XD 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? spaceeeeee. but the ocean would be cool too. those are like my two fave things 45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? moneeeyyy. HAAHA i'm so kidding. um... you know.. i have to think about that one. just trying to be the best person i can and try my best in life i guess... and my cats lol 46. What are you paranoid about? stupid shit all the time 47. Have you ever been high? no 48. Have you ever been drunk? no but close like one time lol i'm a good noodle 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? probably but cant think of what. oh wait... yuppp yuppp.... hahahahahha 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black 51. Ever wished you were someone else? maybe before but i dont really these days 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my weight. but luckily i can change it..and i'm trying 53. Favourite makeup brand? not a huge makeup girl but i guess elf 54. Favourite store? i already answered that pretty much but i guess if i have to choose... target. well. but publix tho. both 55. Favourite blog? follow too many..like alot..dont really have one fave 56. Favourite colour? purple. black. silver. blue 57. Favourite food? so many foods. publix subs are bae though. and steak is awesome. and any pasta 58. Last thing you ate? some chunky peanut butter on a slice of bread and some ramen noodles with sweet peas lol 59. First thing you ate this morning? oatmeal and my vegan maple sausage haha 60. Ever won a competition? For what? ummm... I dont think so. i'm not that cool 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? nah 62. Been arrested? For what? nooo lol 63. Ever been in love? yes 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? well i have two stories XD when I was in 2nd grade I pretty much forced my kisses upon this kid on the playground ahahah.... but really when I was 14, with my first boyfriend, it was outside my apartment by a tree and pond and it was super de duper awkward but i think at the time i thought it was the greatest thing ever but it was actually awful lol 65. Are you hungry right now? nah i'm full and too tired to be hungry 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? no 67. Facebook or Twitter? facebook 68. Twitter or Tumblr? tumblr 69. Are you watching tv right now? yes..shark tank 70. Names of your bestfriends? rue. and lamby. my cats XD XD XD jk but i have a few 71. Craving something? What? cuddles. sleep. blankets. kisses. 72. What colour are your towels? all the colors 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? like 5 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? sometimes 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? several 75. Favourite animal? so many. elephants. cows. penguins. cats.... i love all animals though 76. What colour is your underwear? black 77. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate 78. Favourite ice cream flavour? mint 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? black 80. What colour pants? gray 81. Favourite tv show? the walking dead 82. Favourite movie? so many 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? original 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? thats tough but mean girls 85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? janice and karen 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Dory 87. First person you talked to today? my mom 88. Last person you talked to today? same 89. Name a person you hate? I'm really not the hating type but the closest to hate I have for someone sadly is one of my brothers. and donald trump XD 90. Name a person you love? this girl 91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? not really 92. In a fight with someone? i dont think you can really call it that lol 93. How many sweatpants do you have? at least 3 94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? like 5 95. Last movie you watched? proud mary in the theater...twice in one weekend haha it was soooo gooood 96. Favourite actress? many. jennifer lawrence. kate mara. sjp. melissa mccarthy 97. Favourite actor? norman reedus 98. Do you tan a lot? never 99. Have any pets? 2 sweet kitties 100. How are you feeling? soooo tireddd 101. Do you type fast? ya 102. Do you regret anything from your past? not really regret..i just have a lot of what ifs 103. Can you spell well? for the most part 104. Do you miss anyone from your past? very much 105. Ever been to a bonfire party? yes..thatd be nice right now 106. Ever broken someone’s heart? yaa a couple times 107. Have you ever been on a horse? yesss 108. What should you be doing? sleeping 109. Is something irritating you right now? not really 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? oh ya 111. Do you have trust issues? you asked that already 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? my mom 113. What was your childhood nickname? none really..some people called me by my middle name, deena 114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes 115. Do you play the Wii? I used to alot ..not so much lately 116. Are you listening to music right now? no, watching tv 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? yes 118. Do you like Chinese food? yessss 119. Favourite book? Look Again by Lisa Scottoline. Paper Towns and Looking for Alaska by John Green 120. Are you afraid of the dark? nah 121. Are you mean? for sure not 122. Is cheating ever okay? nooo 123. Can you keep white shoes clean? i dont get all white shoes 124. Do you believe in love at first sight? eh... i have too long of an answer for that.. i dont really know 125. Do you believe in true love? yes 126. Are you currently bored? no just tired 127. What makes you happy? my cats, coffee, music, sleep, food, certain people 128. Would you change your name? eh maybe. i dont mind it..its just too common 129. What your zodiac sign? aquarius 130. Do you like subway? ya but not as much as i used to 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? i dont have one of the opposite sex so dont need to worry about that problem XD 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? again u asked that already 133. Favourite lyrics right now? several songs. first came to mind.. goodnight moon 134. Can you count to one million? well sure but do you think theres time for that right now? no. 135. Dumbest lie you ever told? i'm not sure 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? closed usually 137. How tall are you? like 5'7 or 5'8 138. Curly or Straight hair? in between 139. Brunette or Blonde? brunette 140. Summer or Winter? errmmm depends 141. Night or Day? night 142. Favourite month? december 143. Are you a vegetarian? nah 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? darrrrkk but milk is fine too 145. Tea or Coffee? coffee 146. Was today a good day? Ya i suppose... kinda just average really 147. Mars or Snickers? snickers 148. What’s your favourite quote? eh i have a few but i'm too sleepy to think 149. Do you believe in ghosts? yes in a sense 150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? but blessed are your eyes for they see and your ears for they hear

many questions...feel free to steal

Sweat Lodge Protocols and Safety

First let me say, this is intended to only be a very basic general knowledge and certainly is not all inclusive and does not apply to every tribal tradition and way of practicing the sweat lodge ceremony. It is only a brief description of protocols that from my personal experience seem to be good rules of thumb when attending any Native American ceremony. When attending a ceremony with a particular ceremonial leader of a particular tribe or group, you should consult someone who knows that leader and ceremony for information on what is expected of those attending.

Sweat Lodge is a ceremony that has been used by many Native American Tribes and other indigenous people for centuries. Contrary to some people's beliefs, the sweat lodge is not just a sauna. It is a very sacred ceremony of spiritual and physical purification. The main focus is prayer. The sweat lodge is also used for many specific purposes. There are doctoring lodges, lodges to prepare people for other ceremonies and many other purposes. The sweat lodge most people are familiar with is commonly called prayer and purification sweat.

The first thing that is important to know is that every stage of the sweat lodge is part of the ceremony. The ceremony actually begins when it is determined that the ceremony will take place. Building the sacred fire, covering the lodge, and creating the altar are all part of the ceremony. Be respectful in behavior and speech during all stages of the ceremony. Click here Bistate Lodge

Don't attend a sweat lodge if you are under the influence of any substance. The repercussions of this are too many, too varied and sometimes too severe to discuss here. You should simply do not do it. A general rule of thumb for substance users is; have at least 4 days clean/sober and have deep sincere intention of staying clean/sober prior to attending.

What I have been taught by the Elders is that one should never take without giving something back, whether you are taking from nature, receiving the gift of other's work, or asking from the spirits, therefore it is customary to gift a pouch of tobacco to the leader and the fire tenders. It is also good to gift them after the ceremony with goods, or a monetary donation. Value and cost are not important. If you are struggling financially and have no gifts to offer, that is okay too, but any small token of gratitude is good. It is important to know ahead of time whether a lodge leader is offended by a gift of money. By all means ask someone who knows the leader! I know of no traditional leader that will evercharge for a ceremony, however, many appreciate a gift of money while others feel that is too closely related to charging for the ceremony.

All the ceremonies I have ever attended have a feast afterward. Bring food for the table. Juice is also good. Maybe some paper plates and cups too. Whatever you can bring to contribute to the feast is good. Alcoholic beverages are not appropriate.

While waiting to go into the lodge, ask what you can do to help. And remember, all stages of preparation are part of the ceremony. Whatever you help with, do in a respectful and careful manner. It is good to watch those with experience to learn and follow their example. I have been taught to do things like the Creator and Spirit world are watching. (mainly because they are!)

Don't touch the belongings of others. There will be many sacred items present for the sweat lodge such as Sacred Pipe bundles, rattles, drums and many other items. Yes, they are very beautiful and seem to attract touch, however, do not touch. These items are the personal ceremonial and sacred items of the individuals present and it is considered serious disrespect and desecration to touch them unless invited to do so.

Sweat lodge is a place to humble your self before the Creator and Spirit world. Don't wear make-up. It won't stay on anyway, it will run down your face, into your eyes and irritate. It is also important to remove jewelry and any other tokens of vanity.

Don't pass between the sacred fire and the lodge structure. There are many reasons for this. It can disrupt the flow of spiritual energy, it can make you sick, and numerous other reasons. If you need to get to the other side walk all the way around.

Don't pass in front of elders. Now here's the tricky part. Elders aren't always elderly and sometimes they are even younger than you. The lodge leader is your elder, he/she sits ahead of you in ceremony, therefore is your elder. Little things count too, example, if an elder is approaching on the same path as you, step aside and stop until the elder has passed.

I won't speak specifically here concerning women's issues, however, if you are a female of child bearing age it is important for you to speak to an experienced woman about attending the sweat lodge ceremony prior to attending. She will know what to tell you.

When it is time to go into the lodge, the leader will usually speak and give direction. Listen and follow direction. If you don't understand, again, watch those with experience and follow their example. Go into the ceremony without expectations and with a humble heart and attitude. You will be blessed.

Once inside the lodge the heated Grandfather Stones will be brought in. Depending on the leader and the tradition followed, Pipes may be smoked, food may be passed, the leader may take time to speak and teach and like I said, go without expectations as every ceremony and every leader is different. Once the door is closed it will be pitch dark. The leader will pour water on the stones, steam will be produced and it will be very hot. Usually everyone will be asked to pray, songs may be sung, drums may be played or rattles may be used. Most sweat lodge ceremonies have 4 rounds, or, the door will be closed and opened 4 times. Again, this may vary with different tribes and leaders.

Safety Issues Surrounding the Sweat Lodge Ceremony

In light of the recent events in an Arizona (so-called) sweat lodge during which several people died and several others required medical attention, I want to speak now on safety issues surrounding the sweat lodge ceremony. Let me start by saying that I have been attending sweat lodge ceremonies for many years and have never been in a sweat lodge where someone needed medical attention or died. Of course, I've never attended a so-called sweat lodge with a self-help guru as leader either. I've only attended Native American traditional sweat lodges and have always been very safe there.

Know who you are sweating with. If you don't know the lodge leader personally, ask those who do about the leaders experience, training, history, background and reputation. If you don't feel you can trust them, find some place else to attend ceremony. Many times I will attend a sweat lodge as a helper only for the purpose of observing, getting to know the leader and getting a spiritual feel for the energy and the experience of the leader. It is very important that you trust your lodge leader as your physical and spiritual safety may be in their hands.

If a price is set and money is being charged for a sweat lodge this is a good indicator that you should not attend. The goal of such so-called sweat lodges is to make profit and you can bet they will pack in as many people as possible. Traditional ceremonial leaders will never set a price or charge for a ceremony and if there are too many people that need to pray, most of us will do two sweat lodges back to back to take care of all the people who need to pray instead of packing people in too tightly.

If you have medical conditions or physical limitations, make them known. Always discuss the sweat lodge ceremony with your physician prior to attending to gain understanding of how the heat and steam may affect your condition. An experienced sweat lodge leader will know how to help you with any safety concerns and will do so without hesitation.

Hydration is very important. Drink plenty of water prior to going into the sweat lodge. Many leaders will also have water passed to drink between the rounds when the door is open. An experienced leader will also allow you to go out between rounds if you need to or stay outside for the remainder of the ceremony if need be. Again, make your needs known. The sweat lodge is about prayer and if all you are praying for is to survive then the purpose has not been fulfilled. The sweat lodge is not an endurance contest or to show how "tough" you are. It is about prayer, purification, healing and humility.

Make sure to wear lightweight cotton clothing. Some synthetics can melt during the ceremony, so cotton is best. Be sure to ask beforehand what attire is appropriate for the sweat lodge you are attending. Bring in a towel. Remove all metal jewelry as it will heat up and can cause burns. Remove contact lenses and glasses, these too can melt and cause eye damage.

Many people will experience some distress during their first sweat lodge ceremony such as feelings of claustrophobia, difficulty breathing, and some begin to hyperventilate. Don't be embarrassed about this and certainly don't be afraid to say something. Sitting next to an experienced person can help as they will know skills to get you through it. Some good things to remember are; focus on your breathing, breathe in and out slowly and rhythmically, begin to focus on your prayers while breathing. It is much cooler next to the Earth, lie down if you need to. Everyone in the lodge is there to help each other and they will make room for you to lie down and help you through any struggle you may experience. If you can't get through your distress don't be afraid to ask for the door to be opened. An experienced leader will open the door right away.

The sweat lodge ceremony is a sacred ceremony and a very healing experience as well as an intense spiritual experience when done properly, according to tradition, and in a deeply respectful manner. The sweat lodge has helped thousands to heal, to overcome limitations, and to grow personally and spiritually, and should always be so.

If you choose to attend a sweat lodge ceremony I hope you find these things I've talked about helpful, and like I said in the beginning, this list is not all inclusive and does not necessarily apply to all tribal traditions or types of sweat lodge ceremonies. But it should be fairly close. Journey well.

3, 8, 13, 24, 27, and 36 please ^.^

3) Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.

There’s, so much to say about her. I’m not going to use her name for privacy’s sake, so I’ll just call her B. She was someone I had known for years, since I was a lot younger, but I lost contact with her because her family moved out of the area. B came back into my life during highschool and christ, I was smitten. I already cared deeply for her as a friend, but it became more than that over time.

B was absolutely wonderful to be around. We shared a lot of interests and could completely just nerd out and goof off around one another without worrying about being judged, but when it boiled down to it she was more than willing to be serious and have some serious discussion. We were both in really bad places when we came into eachothers lives, and we did what we could to support one another. I just felt like I could be my whole self with her, and she expressed the same thing to me. I loved every part of who she was. Not to mention, she was beautiful. B was taller than me, which she loved to give me shit for since she was younger than I was. She was thin and had long curly hair that had a lot of volume. She held herself in a quiet calm way most of the time, usually having her head in a book or craned over a new sketch. When she was happy though, she’d blossom into this loud energetic version of herself that I loved to see. Since she was quiet most of the time, it was always a treat to hear what she had to say, and I loved listening to her ramble on about things she was passionate about. Seeing her light up over the things she loved was amazing, especially when I was able to join in and make her laugh. We considered ourselves a couple, but we didn’t do many couple things. Since both of our families were incredibly homophobic, we had to stay on the down low. Not to mention she was asexual and didn't enjoy things like kissing, and I was terrified of human contact in general, so we stuck to softer forms of pda like holding hands and the like. When we had quiet intimate moments, where we could just be together, it was honestly perfect.

While we were in a relationship for a time, but we really shouldn’t have been, which we were both well aware of. Doing so put us in danger in our respective homes, but at the time, we didn’t care. We were all we had, for a time. She was one of the only positive aspects of my life at the time, honestly. As can be expected of a relationship forged in bad conditions like this, dependant on hiding and pretending like we dont even interact, things didn’t work out, and we aren’t in eachothers life anymore. But, I don’t regret most of what happened between us. We were just dumb, lonely teenagers that needed some support that we never got. I really hope she’s doing well.

8) Talk about the thing you are most proud of.

I’m extremely proud of myself for making it out of my parent’s home. I was raised in such a way that I was almost entirely dependant on them, and I had no idea how to exist without constantly being told what to do and where to go and who to be. I’m still recovering and struggling to find my footing, but I feel like I’m finally making progress and that I might actually have a shot at existing as my own person, as somebody who hasn’t been shaped and manipulated by them. I survived everything that’s been thrown at me and I fully intend to continue doing so.

13) Talk about the first time you had sex/ how you imagine your first time.

I’ve never had sex. I imagine my first time, if I ever do have sex, will be pretty damn awkward. It’d have to be with someone who I already trust a lot, so I’d probably be okay for the most part, but I imagine I wouldn’t have much of a clue what to do. It’d definitely be a learning experience, and I feel like it’d probably turn out okay in the end. It’s not something I’ve thought a lot about to be honest.

24) Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.

I remember when I came out to my best friend, and she told me she was going to be there for me no matter what. I had been so anxious over realizing that not only was I dealing with same sex attraction, but that I was trans, and I was so scared that she wasn’t going to want to be around me anymore. I told her over facebook messanger at like 1 in the morning while I was in the middle of an episode, hunched over the school-issued cromebook, just bawling my eyes out because I had convinced myself that I was going to lose my entire family and my friends over this. She was really patient and helped calm me down, but what really stuck with me was when she said she was proud of me. She told me she was so proud of me, and that she loved me no matter what and that she was going to help me through it. What she said helped me then, and continues to ease my nerves years later, because I know that no matter what happens, we have eachother. It’s honestly some cheesyass bullshit and I have no idea what the hell I did to deserve it, but I’m so grateful to her.

27) Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body.

I love my best friend’s hair. Like, seriously, this girl can pull off literally anything. She’s had long wavy hair, short wavy hair, a really short almost pixie cut both dyed and undyed, and now she’s rocking a perm and I’m sitting here like- “girl, how tf?? Are you so perfect??” Not to mention it’s really soft to the touch and sometimes she lets me play with it and I love running my fingers through it and snchhczksu god I love herr

36) Talk about your guilty pleasures.

Icecream. I fucking, love icecream. I will eat that delicious frozen treat at literally any time of the year in any weather and I hate myself for it lmao. If I ever say no to icecream and have not already had my fill of icecream, either I am severely ill or I have been replaced by an imposter there is no inbetween. Oof I don’t want to talk about any of the things tho that shits embarassing sorry-

This turned out to be a really long post jfc sorry about that. Anyway-

Thanks for asking!! 💚💚💚

do all 100 questions

I’m so pissed I started this and got through 25 ish questions and then closed the tab so here we go again

6 of the songs you listen to most?

Praying, Ke$ha

Eraser, Ed Sheeran

Play That Song, Train

Here, Alessia Cara

We Didn’t Start the Fire, Bon Jovi

Something Just Like This, Chainsmokers and Coldplay

If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

TBH I don’t know

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“He infused them with Stormlight, Lashing them to a point behind the king.”

What do you think about most?

Figuring out who I am and what I want

What does your latest text message from someone else say?

“I think I cab sleeo NoeThank u for the kittiesThey wer v niceIlyyyyy ❤❤❤❤❤”

(spelling errors left intact)

Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

depends on the day

What’s your strangest talent?

My ability to be very awkward

Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Both are great?

Ever had a poem or song written about you?

Yes! several actually!

When is the last time you played the air guitar?

....not in my memory

Do you have any strange phobias?

nah, not that I can think of

Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

Absolutely

What’s your religion?

Atheist/Agnostic

If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

Reading/Biking/Hiking/just chilling

Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

both but generally behind

Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

.....whichever one of those in Q1 counts as a band?

What was the last lie you told?

Something decently sized and sorta important but overall unimportant

Do you believe in karma?

Yes

What does your URL mean?

I was 15 and really liked the Stormlight Archives

What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

Greatest weakness is probably the fact that I assume everything is directed at me and I have trouble telling people when things bother me (lmao closely interacted), and my greatest strength is my ability to befriend some really weird people

Who is your celebrity crush?

N/A

Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

Yes! several times 

How do you vent your anger?

I write

Do you have a collection of anything?

Yes!

Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

depends on the person and topic

Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

Mostly? I’ve got a long way to go till I’m the person I want to be tho

What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

I cannot stand the sound of people eating, some peoples voices are truly fantastic though.

What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if my dad had known earlier?

Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Maybe? Absolutely

Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

A wall (complete with Ace flag), and my water Bottle

Smell the air. What do you smell?

Surprisingly nothing?

What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

It depends a lot on the definition of worst TBH? cause like...worst for my mental health is probably high school?

Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

East. all the way

Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

I don’t know if there is anyone with an opposite gender to me? I mean how do you invert Nonbinary?

To you, what is the meaning of life?

42

Define Art.

Something that makes someone happy/feel things

Do you believe in luck?

In small amounts

What’s the weather like right now?

Cloudy and humid as fuck (if it would storm at any point that would be fucking fantastic)

What time is it?

2:20 am

Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

Yes and no!

What was the last book you read?

I’m in the middle of Way of Kings

Do you like the smell of gasoline?

Somewhat actually?

Do you have any nicknames?

Harpe diem, Ralph, that nickname my mom gave me that I’m not telling y’all.

What was the last film you saw?

The Matrix

What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

definitely a tie between breaking a chip off my foot and cutting a gash in my thigh that (at the time) was like half the length of my thigh (please note I didn’t get medical assistance for this and instead just applied a lot of bandaids)

Have you ever caught a butterfly?

Yes! 

Do you have any obsessions right now?

The TV show leverage and Cosmere are a few!

What’s your sexual orientation?

Ace!

Ever had a rumour spread about you?

Maybe? not in a bad way tho

Do you believe in magic?

Small magics

Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

That depends a Lot on what they’ve done

What is your astrological sign?

Cancer

Do you save money or spend it?

Save, definitely save

What’s the last thing you purchased?

Tomatoes

Love or lust?

Love

In a relationship?

Nope

How many relationships have you had?

3

Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

Nah

Where were you yesterday?

Generally near my school, more specifically I did a lot of walking and visited the farmers market

Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

yeah, my roommate loves pink

Are you wearing socks right now?

Nope

What’s your favourite animal?

Dragons!

What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

Being myself? idk?

Where is your best friend?

They’re all a little scattered, within a mile of me, this city, another state, two other cities in my state

Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

Oh shoot I’m bad at this idk, it’s 2:30 in the morning don’t ask me to make decisions

What is your heritage?

All of those Scandinavian countries? yes

What were you doing last night at 12AM?

something on my computer

What do you think is Satan’s last name?

something that starts with LeC-

Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

I’m ignoring this one cause I don’t wanna

Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

I hope so

You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Call my boss as I fish the dog out and run to work

You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

I definitely tell people

I don’t know what I’d do honestly, cry a lot probably? 

definitely 

You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

Trust

What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

Yellow Submarine

What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

Why do you want this information?

In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

Trust and communication

How can I win your heart?

Be kind, listen, don’t ask for more than you can give, enjoy things I enjoy

Can insanity bring on more creativity?

Yeah I suppose so

What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Switching high schools to the one I graduated from

What size shoes do you wear?

8 or 11

What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

Fuck man I don’t know

What is your favourite word?

I don’t really have one?

Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Muscle

What is a saying you say a lot?

“We’re just going to ignore me doing that stupid ass thing that I just did”

What’s the last song you listened to?

Eraser, Ed Sheeran

Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

Blue/Green

What is your current desktop picture?

This stock photo of an ocean

If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

How big is the blast radius?

What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

here’s the thing, I would say but then people would ask and I don’t wanna answer it so nah

One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

My heart rate would spike and then I’d probably just....leave

You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

Invisibility

You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

A time when I was 12 or so and I could just hike on the eno with my dad and cookout

You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

As shitty as some points of my life have been I would keep them because they’ve shaped who I am and my understanding of myself

You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

No one

You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

To a mountain range

Do you have any relatives in jail?

ummmmmm

I don’t actually know how they’re related to me but my great aunt’s grandchildren’s boyfriend maybe??? is/was in jail????

Have you ever thrown up in the car?

yes. it fucken sucked

Ever been on a plane?

Yeah! I enjoy it!

If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

can we all collectively take one deep breath and then think this through? Okay thanks, now exactly what is the issue with everyone?

1-150 for asks

oH mY  gosH

1.Who was the last person you held hands with? My little cousin2. Are you outgoing or shy? shy3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My girlfriend4. Are you easy to get along with? I’d like to think I am5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? I hope6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Nice people7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? Yes8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Nobody9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Nah10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? I can’t remember11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? Ya12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? The entire Wings album, oh mY GoSH. (and Limitless by NCT127)13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? YES OH MY GOOSH14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? No15. What good thing happened this summer? I didn’t die I guess16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? It was my mom so probably lol17. Do you think there is life on other planets? OF COURSE18. Do you still talk to your first crush? lmao ya, he’s like one of my best friends now19. Do you like bubble baths? Yes20. Do you like your neighbors? Yes21. What are you bad habits? I rip the skin off of my lips and pick at my skin22. Where would you like to travel? I want to see New York again23. Do you have trust issues? Yes24. Favorite part of your daily routine? The part where I wake up at 2am and nobody in my home is awake25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Every part tbh26. What do you do when you wake up? Stare at my ceiling27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? I like it the way it is28. Who are you most comfortable around? My girlfriend and my friend Gerritt29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? What ex’s? lol30. Do you ever want to get married? Ahh idk31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? A very tiny pony tail32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? NoNE33. Spell your name with your chin. Rfhyanna, very close34. Do you play sports? What sports? Golf35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Without TV36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Yes37. What do you say during awkward silences? Nothing38. Describe your dream girl/guy? They’re nice, appreciate memes and puns, like dogs, enjoy swaghetti 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? Target40. What do you want to do after high school? IDK41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? NOPE42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? I’m planning my death43. Do you smile at strangers? I try44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? TAKE ME TO THE BOTTOM OF THAT OCEAN45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Needing to use the bathroom46. What are you paranoid about? Everything keeps me in constant paranoia47. Have you ever been high? No48. Have you ever been drunk? No49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Ya50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Blue51. Ever wished you were someone else? Yes52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? My whole body53. Favourite makeup brand? Too Faced54. Favourite store? Target55. Favourite blog? There’s too manY56. Favourite colour? Red57. Favourite food? Lasagna 58. Last thing you ate? I think it was pizza59. First thing you ate this morning? It’s 6am so nothing yet60. Ever won a competition? For what? I can’t think of any61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? No62. Been arrested? For what? No63. Ever been in love? I think so64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? nOPE LMAO(an actual disaster and I hated it)65. Are you hungry right now? No66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? I like them equally67. Facebook or Twitter? Twitter68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr69. Are you watching tv right now? No70. Names of your bestfriends? All of my friends71. Craving something? What? A hug72. What colour are your towels? Brown, blue, green72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 473. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? Yes74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? I think 1375. Favourite animal? Dolphins and Dogs76. What colour is your underwear? You don’t need to kno77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate78. Favourite ice cream flavour?79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Black80. What colour pants? Blue81. Favourite tv show? South Park82. Favourite movie? Corpse Bride83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Mean Girls84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Gretchen Weiners86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Crush the Turtle87. First person you talked to today? Haven’t talked to any one yet88. Last person you talked to today? No one89. Name a person you hate? Myself90. Name a person you love? Nicki Minaj91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Myself92. In a fight with someone? No93. How many sweatpants do you have? None94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 15 (I still want more lol)95. Last movie you watched? Cop Out96. Favourite actress? None97. Favourite actor? None98. Do you tan a lot? Yup99. Have any pets? Yes, a goldfish100. How are you feeling? Tired101. Do you type fast? No102. Do you regret anything from your past? Of course103. Can you spell well? No104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes105. Ever been to a bonfire party? No106. Ever broken someone’s heart? Yes107. Have you ever been on a horse? No, I’ve been on a pony tho108. What should you be doing? Homework lol109. Is something irritating you right now? Sounds are happening outside110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Yup111. Do you have trust issues? YES112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Idk113. What was your childhood nickname? Baby Fats114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yup115. Do you play the Wii? Not frequently 116. Are you listening to music right now? No117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Yah118. Do you like Chinese food? YeS119. Favourite book? Don’t have one120. Are you afraid of the dark? Kind of121. Are you mean? I try not to be122. Is cheating ever okay? No123. Can you keep white shoes clean? No124. Do you believe in love at first sight? No125. Do you believe in true love? Why not126. Are you currently bored? Nope127. What makes you happy? Hugs and coffee and sleep128. Would you change your name? No129. What your zodiac sign? Gemini130. Do you like subway? No131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Say no 132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Idk133. Favourite lyrics right now? “One morning when I woke up, I wish I was dead. I want someone to kill me. In this loud silence I live to understand the world. The world has never understood me.”-Always by Rapmonster (this song, I love it)134. Can you count to one million? Probably not135. Dumbest lie you ever told? “I live in a pink house”136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed137. How tall are you? 5ft138. Curly or Straight hair? I have straight hair139. Brunette or Blonde? I’m brunette140. Summer or Winter? WINTER141. Night or Day? Night142. Favourite month? June143. Are you a vegetarian? No144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk145. Tea or Coffee? Coffee146. Was today a good day? It’s still the morning, but probably not147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers148. What’s your favourite quote? Can’t think of one149. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line “the film. “Terry Jones did several drafts, then Laura” -Labyrinth the Ultimate Visual History