misfits VII
⇥ pairing: ot8 ateez x fem! reader
⇥ warnings: anxiety, swearing, shit gets revealed :O
⇥ word count: 7.5k
⇥ a/n: this is a crazy chapter buckle up your seatbelts, pookies.
⇢ masterlist ⇠
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--- THIS IS AN 18+ FANFICTION MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ---
“I’ve actually never been to a furniture store before,” you admit, smiling towards Yunho who is driving the car towards your destination.
When you emerged from your bedroom earlier, you could almost feel the tension in the air, you attempted to go back into your room, yet Jongho saw you and beckoned you over. Just like that, they all dispersed, going their own separate ways. You tried to read the room, seeing as they all seemed to have heavy hearts and sorrowful looks plastered on their features. Yet, they disappeared far too quickly for you to read further or even get a question out, leaving Hongjoong and Yunho in the kitchen. You were amiably surprised when Yunho said he was tagging along, claiming he needed a new set of drawers.
“We have been way too many times,” Yunho admits, his eyes not leaving the road.
“When we first moved to the house there was no furniture at all, so we had to go out and get it all. Plus, we only have one car, so many trips were necessary.” Hongjoong adds, sitting in the back seat, looking at you through the rear-view mirror.
Turning backwards to look at him, you have a baffled look on your expression, causing Hongjoong to give you a questioning stare.
“You know you can deliver the furniture, right?” You ask him, wondering if he actually didn’t know that the company delivers, to make things easier for the customers.
“I know that silly.” Hongjoong pokes your forehead softly with his index finger, “It takes two to three days to deliver, we didn’t want to sleep on the floor for three days.” He explains, an amused grin covering his features.
“Plus, we got to see it looked like, beds sofas and stuff. It was nice to try it out before buying it.” Yunho adds on, informing you further why they didn’t order what they needed online.
Realising their point, you recline back into your chair, feeling slightly bashful that you were wrong about something so confidently.
Glancing to your left, your gaze naturally falls upon Yunho, He is wearing a white button-up shirt tucked in light-washed denim pants. It’s such a simple outfit yet for some reason he just looks so good. He has his sleeves pulled up, revealing the tantalizing glimpse of his strong forearms, tense and defined. Tracing your gaze down his arms all the way to his hands, your mind gets even wilder as you notice the silver rings adorning his long slender fingers, veins flowing from his hands and up his strong arms. The sunlight cascades through the window, casting a warm glow upon his features, accentuating the chiselled lines of his jaw and the gentle curve of his lips. Your eyes scan the contours of his face, captivated by the subtle play of shadows and the spark of determination that shines in his eyes as he steers the vehicle.
A rush of warmth floods your chest, causing your heart to flutter as you realize that your feelings for Yunho may extend beyond friendship. At this moment, every feature seems to come alive, every detail etched in your mind. You can't help but be drawn to the confident yet gentle way he holds the steering wheel, and the subtle movements of his hands as they navigate the road ahead. There's an undeniable magnetism about him, an intoxicating blend of strength and tenderness that stirs something deep within you.
You catch yourself stealing glances, unable to tear your eyes away, as if you are glimpsing at a masterpiece that the world is yet to fully appreciate.
Attempting to calm your beating heart and mute the heat covering your cheeks, you take a deep, silent breath. It’s when you look up into the rear-view mirror and notice Hongjoong’s sharp, sultry eyes already staring deep into your eyes, the sudden eye contact making you feel weak at the knees, and you are suddenly thankful that you are sitting down, knowing you would have likely fallen over otherwise. Hongjoong is staring back at you with mischievous eyes and a playful smirk dancing on his lips. In that fleeting moment, his actions become laden with a teasing flirtatiousness that catches you off guard, sending a jolt of excitement through your veins. He smirks at you, accompanied by a subtle raise of his eyebrow, and playfully runs a hand through his hair. The air inside the car crackles with a newfound tension, and a rush of warmth flushes to your cheeks as you become flustered by his unexpected display. The flicker of attraction between you becomes palpable in this shared moment of connection.
Holding the stare with Hongjoong, you observe as he leans back in the seat he is residing in, his legs relaxing slightly as his body relaxes against the back of the leather chair, bringing his arms up to cross over his chest, his eyes not leaving yours for a second. The smirk is still on his features, and you just know it’s there because he saw you checking out his friend. However, wanting the attention on him, Hongjoong spreads his legs a little further, cocking an eyebrow in your direction he teases you gently, almost as if he is asking, ‘Like what you see?’
You hate the way his small actions have such a large impact on you, suddenly realising that you are in a car with truly gorgeous men. Amidst the hustle and bustle of your own world in recent times, you suddenly find yourself grappling with the realization that you haven't truly taken the time to appreciate just how exceptionally good-looking each member of Ateez is. A wave of awe washes over you as you stand in their presence, feeling remarkably small and insignificant, wondering how on earth you could ever be fortunate enough to be in their company. The sheer handsomeness of each member seems to magnify with every beat of your racing heart, leaving you helplessly captivated.
It's as though a curtain has been lifted, allowing you to truly see and appreciate their stunning features. The realization dawns on you that you had only scratched the surface of their attractiveness until now. The more you've gotten to know them, the more their genuine sweetness and caring nature have illuminated their physical appeal. It's as if their inner beauty has enhanced their external allure, rendering them even more striking and enchanting.
Even Yunho, who perhaps hadn't initially caught your eye as much, now seems to possess a charm that surpasses your earlier perception. The subtle nuances in his expressions, the way his eyes sparkle with mischief or soften with empathy, all contribute to an undeniable attraction that you hadn't fully recognized before. As you find yourself drawn to his presence, you can't help but acknowledge the growing appreciation you hold for his unique and appealing attractiveness.
Lost in this newfound realization, you contemplate how lucky you are to have crossed paths with these remarkable individuals. The depth of their beauty, both inside and out, fills you with a profound sense of gratitude and wonder.
In the past few days, a heightened awareness of your roommates has settled within you, penetrating your thoughts and emotions in complicated ways. Each interaction now leaves a lasting impression on your mind, causing your cheeks to flush and your heart to flutter. Despite the inner chaos and uncharted territory of these recent feelings, you dare not admit or even contemplate the idea of being attracted to all eight of your roommates.
It has been a slow process, this changing perspective that has even redefined your perception of Yunho. That fateful night spent together, retrieving your moisturizer, somehow acted as a spark, unveiling a side of him that you had never fully recognized before. In the aftermath of that unexpected encounter, Yunho's sweetness towards you has only intensified, further clouding your thoughts, and stirring unfamiliar emotions. And it's not just him; all your roommates have shown remarkable kindness towards you, further complicating your feelings.
In the depths of your mind, you fight with the realization that it may be wrong to feel your roommates as something more than friends. You understand that their actions are simply from their naturally kind-hearted nature, not from any romantic intention. Yet, despite this rational understanding, you find it challenging to control the growing attraction you feel towards them. After all, it is only human to be drawn to people who exhibit such genuine warmth and charm.
However, the situation becomes more complex when you consider the details of your daily life. These are the people you see day in and day out, your cohabitants in the place you call home. The very fact that there are eight of them amplifies the difficulty of your feelings. How could you possibly navigate these uncharted waters, let alone muster the courage to confide in Jisung, knowing that his reaction would likely be one of shock and disbelief?
You reassure yourself that it is not a mere crush that you are experiencing. It's merely an appreciation for the captivating charm that each of your roommates possesses. It's a recognition of their magnetic qualities, their ability to make your heart skip a beat with a simple gesture or genuine smile. That's all it is. It's nothing more than finding them inherently and irresistibly charming. Or so you tell yourself, as you grapple with the swirling complexity of emotions that have taken root within your heart.
“Earth to ___?” Yunho breaks you from your thoughts by waving his hand in front of your face, when you zone back into reality, Yunho lets out a chuckle, “There you are.”
As your gaze shifts towards the window, a sudden realization dawns upon you — you find yourself parked in an indoor parking lot, the likely underground expanse hidden from view. Puzzled, you wrack your brain, unable to recall the exact moment when you entered this parking space. A flicker of concern arises within you as you silently hope that your momentary delay of attention while gazing at Hongjoong did not lead to you staring longingly at the man.
Looking back at said man residing in the back seat, you realise he is no longer in the car.
“Where did Hongjoong go?” You question, climbing out of the car, Yunho also departing the vehicle and closing the door behind him.
“Went to get a parking ticket,” Yunho explains, pondering what you were so intensely thinking about for the past few minutes.
Realization prompts a nod from you, and you carefully shut the car door behind you. Swiftly gathering your belongings from the trunk, you hasten your steps to catch up with Yunho, who is already striding purposefully towards what appears to be the entrance of the expansive store. As you approach, Hongjoong appears near the entrance, his expression adorned with a gentle smile that adds a touch of warmth to the scene.
“So, what exactly do you need?” Hongjoong questions as the three of you walk towards the large entrance of the store.
“I originally needed a bed, wardrobe, and a desk but luckily for me, I already have that. So, I’m just looking for some decorations for my room, it is a little plain. No offence” You joke, smiling at the man walking next to you, knowing the room used to be his.
Hongjoong chuckles before answering, “I moved all my stuff from the room into the room upstairs, it looks better than you’d think.”
“I’ll take your word for it.”
As you step foot into the furniture shop for the very first time, a spark of excitement dances in your eyes, and a contagious enthusiasm radiates from your every pore. The vast expanse of elegant sofas, beautifully crafted tables, and stylish decor unfolds before you. Weaving through the aisles, your fingers gently brushing against the soft fabrics, eyes tracing the intricate details of each piece. The shop becomes a playground of inspiration, where you start to envision the perfect blend of comfort and style for your own living space.
Yunho and Hongjoong, watch from a distance, unable to tear their gazes away. As they observe you, they can't help but be captivated by your genuine excitement. Their hearts swell with an inexplicable warmth, witnessing the unfiltered joy that illuminates your face. At this moment, they are reminded of what you bring to their lives, and their own feelings for you start intensifying, more than they thought was even possible.
Yunho and Hongjoong, their hearts heavy with the weight of unspoken words, find relief in simply witnessing your happiness. Longing to be the source of that joy, to be the ones who can make you smile with such genuine delight.
As the three of you drift through the shop, your excitement only intensifies, the two men accompanying you exchange glances, a silent understanding passing between them. They share a mutual desire to preserve your pleasure, even if it means tucking away their own desires for now.
As you walk past the plant section, your attention is immediately grasped by a beautiful bonsai tree. Your gaze fixates on the enchanting tree displayed in the shop, a glint of delight lights up your eyes. Its delicate branches and intricate foliage captivate you. Always having a liking towards bonsai trees, you long to possess this miniature masterpiece, immediately imagining the beauty it would bring to your desk. However, as you glance at the price tag dangling from its pot, a wave of sadness washes over you. The realization that you cannot afford such a cherished treasure weighs heavily on your heart, wishing it wasn’t so expensive.
“Whatever,” you grumble placing the plant back where you found it, reluctantly walking away. Hongjoong and Yunho notice the sudden change in your demeanour, confusion etching across their faces as they wonder why you don’t simply buy the bonsai that has captured your affection.
“Why don’t you get it?” Hongjoong questions as he makes his way next to you.
“It’s too expensive,” you grumble, starting to peer at other plants that are more in your price range.
“I’ll get it for you,” Hongjoong casually says as if it’s nothing.
Looking over at the man, you give him an incredulous look, not quite believing he would spend such money on you.
“What? It’s a nice plant it’ll fit your room perfectly.” He continues, slightly amused by the expression on your face. “Has no one ever bought you something nice before?” He says as a joke, yet when he sees the saddened gaze cover your eyes, his smile immediately wipes away.
“Not really.” You respond, slightly embarrassed.
“I’m getting it.” Yunho immediately says, walking back to where you left the tree, Hongjoong hastily joining him in his steps
“Yunho? Hongjoong stop, it’s too expensive.” You exclaim as you follow on their heels.
“___, just let us. You deserve it.” Yunho says, a blush creeping up his neck as he sees the wide eyed, adorable look present on your face.
“What do you mean? Put it back guys.” You desperately attempt to halt them spending their money on you.
“You deserve nice things,” Hongjoong says, looking you in the eyes, “you deserve even more than this,”
“Just let us buy it, please?” Yunho adds.
The confessions of your roommates catch you completely off guard, leaving you in a state of shock and disbelief. Your heart seems to race at an almost impossible speed, thumping loudly in your chest as their words sink in, the sudden surge of emotion causing your cheeks to feel fiery.
Their heartfelt admission has an astonishing effect on you, intensifying the emotions you've been trying to navigate. The mixture of shock and warmth that courses through you in response to their words only serves to strengthen the feelings you hold deep within your heart. It's a moment you hadn't anticipated, yet you know it will leave an indelible mark on your memory.
“Okay, fine.” Is all you manage to say.
——
“So, is that all you need?” Yunho questions, as the three of you reach the end of the store, near the cashiers. Looking down at the basket Hongjoong is holding, it is nearly full to the brim with small decorations you found cute or fitting for your new bedroom.
Smiling up at the tall man, you nod shortly, excited to get home and arrange all the objects around. Yunho chuckles at the childish grin plastered on your face, not exactly understanding why it is that you’re so thrilled. Nonetheless, the beam on your face is far too infectious, and even he has a hard time masking the smile that is twitching at the corners of his lips.
“Okay, I will pay for my things quickly and I’ll meet you by the car?” You ask, beginning to stand in line to pay.
“We will help you carry the things,” Hongjoong replies, not moving from his spot, wanting an excuse to stay with you for as long as he can, never really having the chance when you are home.
“Please, it’s okay. I will meet you there,” you reply, when you see Yunho opening his mouth to retort, you stick your finger at the both of them, “I’m not taking no for an answer.”
They both chuckle at your adorable antics before unwillingly heading towards the car park, where they will wait for you patiently.
Waving at them as they walk away, you turn your attention back to the line that you are standing in, the basket of ornaments held by your hands. Realizing the line isn’t too big, you feel yourself being relieved, not wanting to make Yunho and Hongjoong wait for too long.
Approaching the cashier, ready to pay for your items, your anticipation mixes with a sense of accomplishment. With each item scanned and placed in a bag, you relish the satisfaction of transforming your vision into actual pieces for your room.
Lost in your thoughts, you suddenly feel a jolt as a man dressed in black carelessly bumps into you, causing your grip to loosen. The item you were holding slips from your hand, a momentary panic gripping your heart. Thankfully, it lands on the ground without breaking, but you can't help but feel a twinge of annoyance at the man's lack of consideration.
Looking up, you somewhat expect to see him swiftly approaching with an apology, but to your surprise, he continues on his way, heading towards the exit, leaving you with a mix of confusion and lingering irritation. Scoffing, you look back at your items and continue putting them into the bag.
Walking back to the car, you try to remember where exactly the car was parked. You didn’t even know they had a car until this morning, so you still aren’t completely familiar with the model or size of the car, only remembering it is white. Maybe a Ford, maybe a Toyota? You can’t remember. At least you remembered what level of the car park you were at, and that it was next to a green wall.
Scanning for the green wall, you are delighted when you find it, next to it a white Mercedes. Your guesses were close enough. Happily making your way to it, you are stopped in your tracks when you see the very person who had bumped into you, standing near the car, causing you momentarily stop walking towards the vehicle, knowing hundreds of stories about people being kidnapped next to their cars. When the person notices you, they immediately start strolling towards you, and for some reason, you thought you would be feeling afraid, yet for some reason, the man in front of you looks extremely familiar, way too familiar. It only clicks in your head when the man is about seven feet from you.
“Danny? What are you doing here?” You question, recognising the man from one of your classes in high school. The suspicion and fright leave your body instantly as you realise who the man is, knowing him as one of the kinder people from your high school. After all the mess had happened, he was one of the only people who still talked to you. He wasn’t particularly one of your friends, but he definitely wasn’t someone you would hate to see again.
“___, I was wondering if that was you.” He exclaims as he reaches you, a smile on his face.
“How did you even recognise me,” you joke, knowing your looks from a few years ago are drastically different from what they are now.
“I am very good at remembering people’s faces, sorry for bumping into you, I was too busy on my phone,” Danny explains, his hand going up to scratch the back of his neck, a light blush on his cheeks, feeling embarrassed for potentially hurting you.
“Don’t worry about it,” you reply as you start to walk towards the car, not having to worry about being kidnapped anymore. Trying to open the trunk, you’re surprised when it doesn’t budge, and you realise that Yunho and Hongjoong haven’t reached the vehicle yet, making you worry ever so slightly.
“So, what are you doing in this city?” Danny asks, curious as to why you are here.
“I’m actually going to college here at the moment,” You smile, answering his question.
Danny has a shocked look on his face, “that’s crazy. You were always smart, but I never thought you were this smart. Isn’t this city's college super hard to get into?”
“I’ll take that as a compliment, and yes it was very difficult, but I made it.” You beam at the man, glad that it isn’t awkward to see him again. “What are you doing here by the way?” You question, realising you don’t know the reason for his random appearance.
“Oh, me and my girlfriend are visiting, I have some distant relatives here who she hasn’t met yet. I wanted to come to this shop because my aunt needed some screws for a broken bed,"
"Are you waiting on your girlfriend now?"
"No she hates furniture stores, so I decided to come quickly seeing as she’s busy.”
“I’m happy for you, Danny! How long have you guys been together?”
“Thank you, ___. Just a little after we graduated high school, she went to the high school near ours.”
“I see, that’s great!”
“Yeah, i guess so,” Danny says, with a sorrowful smile on his face.
“Kind of? What’s up, having some relationship troubles?” You question, reassuringly placing your hand on his shoulder, letting him know he is able to confide in you.
Danny sighs before answering, “I don’t know, recently she’s been acting strange, a few nights ago when she found out some of my relatives were living here, she demanded to go and meet them. It just doesn’t seem like her, she has never really been interested in meeting my family. Plus, when I woke up today, she wasn’t even in the hotel room, all she left was a note saying she was out doing something important. I don’t know what it means or what’s happening or if she is cheating, but it’s very confusing. I’m so sorry for ranting oh my God.” Danny exclaims, covering his face with his hands, embarrassed for suddenly loading a bunch of information on you, but it’s not like you care at all.
“Don’t worry, I really don’t mind. It sounds like she’s got some things going on in her head, my advice to for you to just sit down with her and ask her. If she’s cheating, it is definitely her loss, trust me.” You reassure the man, offering him a gentle comforting smile. It looks as if he really needed to talk to someone and you can only hope in this moment that his girlfriend isn’t out being unfaithful, knowing how much of a sweetheart Danny is.
It’s when you hear Hongjoong’s voice that you’re brought back to reality, “Sorry, ___, the ticket machine wasn’t accepting my card for some reason,” Hongjoong appears from your left, Yunho next to him and you are pleased they are back, wanting some much-needed time to sit down after being on your feet for so long.
“I was wondering where you two were,” you say, looking up at your roommates who have completely stopped and have bewildered looks on their faces, spiking your interest. They don’t look shocked or confused, but fearful and irritated.
Hongjoong and Yunho were discreetly observing from a distance, their hearts skipping a beat as they notice you engaged in conversation with a random man. Concern flickers in their eyes, a protective instinct taking hold. The gentle furrow of their brows reveals their shared worry, their minds racing with the possibilities of what might be happening. From their place, they cannot hear the words exchanged, leaving them with a sense of uncertainty. Are you in trouble? The tension hangs thick in the air as they remain on high alert as they make their way towards you, almost sprinting. However, when they recognise the man who you are so happily chatting to, their hearts almost stop in their chests. All they can do is act normal and pretend they have no idea who the man is, in hopes that, just like you, he won’t be able to identify them.
“Oh, this is Danny, we used to go to high school together,” you explain, knowing that Yunho and Hongjoong would likely be confused as to why you are nattering with a random stranger. Instantly, Hongjoong and Yunho regain their composure, acting as if they were never taken aback. The change in their behaviour was minuscule, yet you somehow managed to notice it and you hope there is nothing wrong. Just like that, their cold exterior is back up, as if it never left.
“Hi,” Hongjoong says bluntly, not even bothering to look Danny in the eyes, simply walking past him and unlocking the car, opening the trunk, and taking the bag from your hands. Silently thanking him, he looks up at you and gives a brief smile.
You expect Danny to bid his goodbyes, yet for some reason, he is staring at Yunho and Hongjoong, with a puzzled look on his features.
“What’s up?” You question, wondering what has Danny’s attention so deeply, it looks as if he is analysing the two of them very thoroughly.
He stays silent for only a few seconds, yet for some reason it feels like an eternity, when he decides to speak it catches you off guard, “Of all the people I was expecting to meet, Kim Hongjoong and Jeong Yunho were definitely not on that list.” Danny’s words are fast, but they feel extremely lengthy, he continues speaking, “Well it does make sense you’re hanging around the group, ___. You were always with Seonghwa.”
Hongjoong and Yunho feel their breaths catch in their throat, their world feels like it's crashing down on them, unable to carry the weight. They look at you, hoping that you do not understand and brush it off, but they know you well enough to not let it slide.
“What do you mean?” You ask, looking at Yunho and Hongjoong with a confused expression, before glancing back at Danny, “you know them?” You ask him, extremely baffled as to why Danny of all people would know about Ateez, thinking only people in your college would be accustomed to the group.
“Yes? Why do you sound so confused? Everyone thought you guys died.” Danny points his statement towards the two males, who are looking incredibly uncomfortable.
“Let’s go, ___.” Yunho demands, his voice the same tone as how you heard it when you first met, venomous, yet this time it isn’t pointed at you. The two want to, need to get out of here before Danny says anything further, uncovering more information for you.
“Yunho, wait. Danny what are you talking about, what group? How do you know Seonghwa?” you inquire, desperate for answers and fast.
Hongjoong calls your name, his voice desperately wanting you to get in the car and get away from the situation before Danny can answer your questions. Looking, at Hongjoong, you see the desperate look in his eyes, and it confuses you further. Why won’t they let you hear the answer, and why are they so agitated by the man in front of you?
“KQ Fellaz? That group you were always with.”
Hongjoong and Yunho curse, Hongjoong letting out a loud exhale and Yunho immediately grabbing your arm, softly pulling you towards the vehicle, begging you to get in.
“KQ? What do they have to do with…” Your voice trails off, your mind starts to unconsciously piece together all the parts, the memories, words, actions, everything starting to fit into place, and you suddenly feel incredibly brainless for not doing it earlier. No wonder they all felt so familiar, memories of the few weeks during the final year of high school come flooding back and you rapidly recognise why you were so gravitated to the group you live with now.
They are KQ Fellaz. Ateez were KQ Fellaz. The outcasted boys you had spent countless days and nights with. It has been almost four years, which explains why they look severely different, but of course, their eyes stayed the same, and that’s exactly why you were drawn into the naturalness of each of their gazes. That explains why the group you have come to know recently, have been so kind, despite their reputation.
As the truth unravels before you, your world shatters into a million pieces, leaving you feeling utterly betrayed by the eight boys who have seemingly re-entered your life. In the depths of your distress, you suddenly realize that they had known all along. The weight of their deception presses upon your heart, suffocating you with a mix of anger, hurt, and a profound sense of betrayal that resonates to the core of your being.
Memories flood her mind, moments spent together, laughter shared, secrets whispered. The realization that they were aware of the cherished moments while you remained ignorant, cuts through your soul like a knife. The questions multiply, tormenting you with the relentless demand for answers. Why had they chosen to keep this truth from you? What were their motives? And perhaps most agonizingly, how have you been so blind to their hidden knowledge, their shared past?
The emotions burst open, unleashing a torrent of pain and confusion. The sorrow swells within you, an overwhelming wave crashing against your heart. The trust you thought you were building with your roommates, now crumbles beneath your feet. Struggling with a deep sense of disappointment, questioning not only the intentions of your ‘friends’ but also your own ability to determine true friendship.
“I see.” You barely manage to get out. “It was nice to see you, Danny.” The meek smile on your face is clearly forced and Danny feels extremely guilty realising he said information that was unknown to you. All he can do is nod and give you a supportive smile, before heading in his own direction.
Slipping into the car, a wave of discomfort washes over you, prompting you to take a seat in the back, intentionally creating a physical distance between yourself, Yunho, and Hongjoong. As the door slams shut, you hastily retrieve your phone from your back pocket, your fingers typing out a message to Jisung. The urgency in your text is palpable as you request that you can stay at his place tonight, recalling that many of his roommates are currently away.
Outside the car, Hongjoong and Yunho stand frozen, their hearts pounding in their chests like a relentless drumbeat. The weight of the situation presses heavily upon them, and when their eyes meet, within that brief exchange, they can see the storm of emotions raging within each other. It's as if a mirror reflects their own turbulence, a shared understanding of the pain and anguish they both feel.
Taking his place in the passenger seat, Hongjoong turns his gaze back towards you, his expression filled with a mixture of sorrow and desperation. Your hunched form, wounded and distant, tugs at his heartstrings, causing his own heart to plummet to depths he didn't think were possible. Though he has endured his fair share of hardships, the sight of betrayal and resentment etched across your face pierces him in a way he has never experienced before.
Yunho joins Hongjoong in the front of the car, his body swivelling to face you, his eyes filled with an agonizing mixture of remorse and yearning. Hongjoong gently calls out your name, his voice a fragile plea to offer an explanation, to bridge the divide that has grown between you. However, before he can utter a single word, you cut him off, your voice brimming with a mixture of anger and hurt.
“Drive.” Your voice is the most, hatred filled, venomous and hurt they have ever heard, you don’t even bother to look at them as you speak, afraid if you look in their eyes one more time, you would be destroyed. Inhaling heavily, they both turn around to face the front of the car. Pausing a moment, before deciding they will talk as soon as you get home and give you all the responses you wish to hear.
The car ride home is a stark contrast to the cheerful journey that brought you here earlier. Laughter and light-hearted banter have been replaced by a suffocating silence, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved tension. The atmosphere inside the car is so thick that it hangs in the air, weighing down on everyone's shoulders like an oppressive burden. Even the most cutting-edge tool would struggle to slice through the palpable tension that fills the vehicle.
In a fleeting moment, your eyes meet Hongjoong's reflection in the rear-view mirror. Within those brief seconds, you catch a glimpse of the profound sorrow and longing that lingers in his gaze. It strikes a chord deep within your heart, causing it to fracture a little more. Unbeknownst to you, Hongjoong's mind is a whirlwind of thoughts, spinning in a storm of overthinking that he has never experienced to this extent before.
On the left side of the car, Yunho mirrors Hongjoong's internal struggle. His hands tightly grip the steering wheel, his chest constricting with every passing second as if he might collapse from the overwhelming weight of guilt that courses through his veins. He keeps his focus on the road ahead, his jaw clenched, tears welling in his eyes, desperately fighting to regain control over the torrent of emotions that threaten to eat him alive.
As the car pulls into the garage of the once-familiar house, a sense of unease washes over you. The once-welcoming ambience has transformed into something cold, foreign, and unrecognizable. Your chest tightens, and the overwhelming sense of utter disloyalty becomes almost too much to bear. You storm into the house, racing ahead of Hongjoong and Yunho who trail closely behind, their footsteps quick and urgent as they frantically try to reach you before you disappear into the solace of your room.
“__, please stop. Talk to us.” Hongjoong’s voice is desperate as he tries to persuade you to halt your movements. You aren’t sure if it is luck or misfortune as you make your way to the kitchen and see every one of your roommates sitting around the island, chatting, and eating their lunch. Forgetting it is their free day, you curse internally, feeling tears already prick at your eyes when the everyday faces you look at become distorted, your vision only being able to see the men who left you four years ago.
As they catch sight of you, the men approach with warm smiles, their hearts lifted at your early return. They had been looking forward to chatting and sharing a meal together, eager to enjoy each other's company. However, their joy quickly dissipates as they take in the contorted, disgusted expression etched across your face. In an instant, worry floods their beings, their thoughts immediately drawn to the earlier conversation about Ryu that still lingers in their minds. The atmosphere shifts, tension intertwining with their concern, creating an uncomfortable heaviness in the room.
Seonghwa rises from his chair, his brows furrowing with concern as he strides towards you, a mix of worry and determination carved into his face. He watches as you storm past him, the force of your collision causing him to stagger slightly. A sharp pang shoots through his chest, not just from the physical impact, but also from the emotional weight behind your actions. It feels as though his heart has been squeezed tightly, aching with the pain of seeing you so distraught.
At the island, the other five men rise from their seats, their eyes following the unfolding scene with a mixture of confusion, alarm, and growing concern. Their gazes shift from you to Yunho and Hongjoong, who swiftly give chase, their expressions reflecting a desperate need to stop you in your tracks and understand what has caused such distress. Seonghwa's initial suspicion that Yunho may have been involved in triggering your reaction dissipates, replaced by a deepening worry for your well-being.
The room is filled with an air of tension and unease as the members of the group stand, their bodies poised in a mixture of anticipation and confusion. Each of them yearns to uncover the hidden emotions behind your furious actions, their senses heightened as they try to decipher the commotion that has enveloped the room.
“__, stop, now.” Hongjoong’s voice booms around the kitchen, echoing with authority and you once again, realise why he is the leader of the group.
Coming to a sudden stop, you pivot on your heels, your body facing the kitchen once more. A fusion of determination and vulnerability flickers in your eyes as you lock gazes with the eight men in the room. Their varied expressions mix puzzlement, concern, and a tinge of guilt.
You take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the moment settle upon your shoulders. This is the opportunity to confront them all, to lay bare the swirling emotions and shattered trust that now consumes your heart. These were the friends you once believed in with unwavering loyalty, the ones you thought you could confide in and rely on with your whole being. It's a bittersweet realization, knowing that the ones you held closest have become the source of your pain and confusion. Yet, you cannot turn away from the truth. You need to face the situation head-on and seek the answers and resolution you so desperately need.
“No, Hongjoong, why don’t you stop.” Your voice matches his tone and for a second you can see him flinch at the harshness of your expression, never having heard or seen you this serious or mad before, your voice never having reached above a shout before. Looking around at the men who all have dreading expressions plastered on their faces, you feel even more angry at how they could hide something so large, so personal, so utterly heartbreaking from you.
“When were you planning on telling me?” you speak again, the anger evident in your voice, yet by the way the tears are forming in your eyes, they can tell you aren’t just mad, but betrayed. The tone in your voice is broken and hurt.
“We were going to tell you,” Yunho explains, his voice quiet, feeling incredibly guilty that the way you had to find out was through someone else, not them.
“I’m sorry what is happening?” Jongho inquires, asking the question that all five of the men who were previously sat down, were wanting to ask. Yet, for some reason they have a good guess at what the answer might be, dread filling their hearts, causing an impending sense of doom to fill their gut. Silence falls upon the room, the tension thickening as each second passes that you don’t answer.
“Answer.” You say, your voice gentle, prompting either Hongjoong or Yunho to reply, explaining what dreadful occurrence has just happened. When neither of them speaks, only looking at you with begging eyes, you raise your voice once again, “Answer it.” You yell, causing all eight men to recoil.
Yunho decides to speak, looking towards his friends who are extremely on edge, dreading the words coming from his shaking lips, “We ran into someone…”
Yeosang slams his hand onto the island, rage encasing his entire being. Thinking it was Ryu they ran into, his heart stops in his chest and he sees red.
“It was Danny,” Hongjoong says instantly, recognising why everyone suddenly tensed up even further.
“What else? Hongjoong.” You spit, the emotions of fury overwhelming all the others.
The way you boom his name pierces through his heart, his breath catching in his throat, tears almost threatening to fall from his eyes, his beautiful eyes. Fuck.
“He recognised us.” This is all Hongjoong says before the tears fall freely from his eyes, the sight breaking you in half, muting your anger slightly, it being replaced by all the desolation and gloom you have in your body.
As the weight of the truth settles in the room, a collective realization sweeps through the eight men. Their expressions shift, revealing a mixture of guilt, anguish, and remorse. The air becomes thick with tension as San and Mingi, overcome with their own instability, resort to desperate gestures; running their hands agitatedly through their dishevelled hair, unable to meet your gaze. Jongho, his face hidden behind trembling hands, struggles to process the gravity of the situation, his breaths coming in deep and uneven. Yeosang averts his eyes, unable to witness the devastating impact of your shattered trust, tears brimming in his own.
However, amidst the chaos, Seonghwa remains fixated on you, his gaze unyielding despite the cracks forming in his own heart. As your eyes meet him, a flood of memories rushes back to you, an overwhelming explosion of anguish and despair from the darkest night of your life. It dawns on you with a haunting clarity that he must have been the one you encountered on that rooftop, the boy whose vulnerability and brokenness mirrored your own. The weight of that realization hits you with an intensity that sends waves of anxiety coursing through your body, a painful reminder of the shared pain and scars etched deep within your souls.
As the weight of the truth crashes down upon you, your body trembles uncontrollably, the ground beneath your feet becoming unsteady. Your legs give way, collapsing beneath you, and you crumple to the floor in a heap of despair. Sobs wrack your body, each one an emotional release of the pain and agony that fills your shattered heart. Your mind becomes a swirling vortex of torment, entangled with thoughts that are both haunting and devastating—a torment that incorporates the present, the past, and an uncertain future.
In an instant, Seonghwa and Yunho rush to your side, their presence a lifeline in the midst of your despair. They kneel down beside you, their arms reaching out to provide comfort and support, their faces etched with concern and helplessness. The remaining members of the group converge around you. Their eyes are filled with a mixture of compassion and desperation, yearning to alleviate your pain, to ease the torment that grips your mind. Together, they form a protective circle around you, their collective presence a symbol of unwavering support.
“Don’t touch me, get the fuck away from me.” You almost scream, feeling their hands on your arms, their bodies close to you, the words crushing their hearts. Needing to get as far away from here as possible, you attempt to stand, but your legs give up again, the panic getting too much for you to handle.
“Tiny, let us help.” Yunho’s voice is the softest you have ever heard, making you break even more.
“Don’t you dare call me that? I trusted you most, Yunho.” Your voice is raw and hoarse, the emotions spilling through, the sound of your feelings pinching the hearts of the men around you.
With Seonghwa's gentle assistance, you manage to regain your footing, though you push him away immediately, needing a moment of independence amidst the whirlwind of emotions. The room falls into an eerie stillness, the air heavy with anticipation, as the gaze of eight pairs of eyes remains fixed upon you. Their hearts pound in their chests, bracing themselves for the impact of your words, fearing the repercussions of what you might reveal next.
Taking a deep, shuddering breath, you steady yourself, mustering the strength to voice the thoughts that have haunted your mind for years. The weight of your words hangs palpably in the air, a thick fog of vulnerability and revelation enveloping the room. Each member of the group feels their heart clench in anticipation, their breathing hitching as they prepare themselves for the final straw, the crushing blow to their already battered souls.
And then, the words spill forth from your trembling lips, carrying with them the raw essence of your pain, your betrayal, and your deepest fears. The room becomes a tempest of emotions, a storm unleashed by your words. Shock, disbelief, and anguish etch themselves onto the faces of the eight men, their expressions frozen in a tableau of shattered trust and shattered dreams. The impact of your confession reverberates through the room, each word a dagger that pierces their hearts with unrelenting force.
“They told me you died; I spent months convincing myself it wasn’t true.”
Yunho's voice quivers with desperation as he urgently calls out your name, the cracks in his tone baring the weight of his emotions that rock on the edge of spilling forth in a stream of tears. The eight men surrounding you, bound by an overwhelming bond, collectively hold their breaths, their very souls entwined in this dreadful moment. Each of them, their hearts heavy with empathy and love, feels their spirits fracture at the mere thought of you bearing the burden of their deaths with no one to fall to.
In the gloomy silence that follows, a distressing realization hangs in the air, intertwining the threads of their unbreakable connection. It is a bittersweet recognition that while their lives are intrinsically entangled with yours, they are also painfully aware of the toll it takes on your spirit. Their hearts ache, fuelled by a profound sense of protectiveness and a desperate desire to shield you from any pain or hardship that may lie ahead.
“I needed you, all of you.”
------
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