#but yeah life facts about me
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Random fact about me is that when I was in preschool (so 4-5ish) I got norovirus and got so sick that it tipped my immune system causing it to attack itself and then I started having kidney failure. I also got a rash on my lower half of my body and itched so much that I have scars on my leg. Now I cannot stand to have even a single inch of me being itchy or else I start to panic/get irritated
So if you’re feeling sick perhaps stay home and make sure to wash your hands to save someone from getting sick
#I heard that norovirus is going around#knock on wood#no one I know gets it#because if I get it again I stg#but yeah life facts about me#i haven’t been the same since#and I think it caused me to get an autoimmune disease#but also that’s like common in my family anyway#this also jsut goes for anything in general
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polymer broadcast signal hijack
#pikmin#captain olimar#ft. louie captain shepherd and collin#as well as#moss (pikmin)#watched a stream series of pikmin 4 (its frankenbugs' series) thats what this is about really#but mostly. I just love olimar. I just really enjoy that man#also this really got me flexing those bande dessinée muscles from back thens lol#Ive missed drawin with this kinda proportions... I should do it more#Im gonna draw an olimar to put in my wallet. I need to make my life harder to explain to strangers#I also wanna. add more details to his space suit. make it look more like real life space suit for fun & entertainment#man I enjoy the animals in pikmin so much. they really are just like. animals. theyre animals#its great I love how genuinely bug-lookin the bugs are even with the stylization. pikmin and pokemon are really good at that#would like to learn how to do that... sometimes in the future#oh yeah fun fact. my effort at cleaning up my undercut a few days ago went badly. right before I went to a family reunion thing for 2 days#so I was goin out of my mind at that event postin abt olimar bc I love him#and then. when I got home. I decided to shave my head instead of trying to fix the haircut again#and so the sequence of events becomes I post about olimar -> I enter my bald arc#I am okay with this. have a good night lads. binding books is actually really fun u should try it
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Hiking with the matesprit
(this was hugely inspired by @/erysium and their gorgeous natural scenes! particularly, this post)
#my art#art#homestuck#fan art#karkat#karkat vantas#nepeta#nepeta leijon#wow. ive. never done a piece like this. at all. wow.#also i feel like it's incredibly easier to color alternia since all the colors are nonsense#i imagine if i had to paint a real life place itd be harder and also wouldnt look as good#this is once again in an au where alternia is cool n fashionable and karkat goes outside#this is my application to work for the hiveswap team <im lying#also i wish there were more resources on the flora of alteria. like serious id love to know what their nature looks like#ofc it's not explicitly katnep but 2 me it is. they r dating always#fun fact if you invert the colors on this the forest turns lovely and green#also karkats about to totally skewer his hand on that tree yeah
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drew arthur with a little friend. they're talking about life and death
#rdr2#rdr2 fanart#barghestland#arthur morgan#art#artists on tumblr#this week life was so fucking horrible i'm on the edge of having a little breakdown#and when im sad and stressed and done with life i just draw arthur#cuz his depressed ass would understand#u know.. yeah :(#i hope whoever reads it is having a better time#if u want u can tell me smth nice in tags or anywhere really<3#like tell me silly names of ur pets or facts about ur favorite bugs#i'd be happy to hear that
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Man I’ve said it before but for as annoying as Leo can be to Hueso, it’s still abundantly clear that Leo has inadvertently done a lot for the man? Yeah, he’s gotten him into a fair share of hijinks, but at the end of each of those was a long standing problem in Hueso’s life solved just like that.
In particular, Hueso’s exile from the Hidden City and his feud with his brother are both solved through Leo’s intervention, and it’s also sweet that both of these issues’ respective episodes end with Hueso happy.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt hueso#rise leo#rise hueso#tldr Hueso is a character whose life is actively made better through Leo being in it and that fact makes me so happy#so yeah as annoying and pushy as Leo is i guarantee Hueso cares about him#and Leo clearly cares as well - Hueso’s a pseudo father/uncle figure who’s seen leo at a pretty low point and actually helped him#WHAT IM SAYING IS BABYSITTER LEO FOR HUESO JR IS COMPLETELY POSSIBLE#and even if the restaurant got damaged in You Got Served Leo (and Mikey!) still saved Hueso’s life#so again - all direct interactions go well in the end
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i’ve seen a few people claim Philip stripped caleb’s jacket off his body after his death as some morbid memento, but we already have his memories on the matter and he had caleb’s jacket pre-fight and was wearing it when he first arrived.
even in his shadow form you can make out he’s wearing the coat.
Not to mention caleb is never seen wearing it in any of the memories on the isles
Nah, as much as i know people love finding new ways to make philip even more morbid, if the story holds any weight, and it probably does, it seems far more likely caleb left it back on earth with philip. There’s no evidence to suggest philip stole it or rid him of it, but that caleb ditched it when he left.
and when philip assumed a witch kidnapped his brother, he put it on, probably as a form of comfort and keeping his brother close at a time where he assumed the worst could have happened to him. Kinda in the same vein of how luz was wearing eda’s jacket to keep her close during their separation.
It seems to be quite an important object to him, being what looks like his only link left to caleb as he was on earth. With the thought he also grew his hair out to have a ponytail like his older brother it appears to be less like “Stealing” and way more like a sign of what was originally his admiration and love for his brother.
A strong desire to be close to him and be like him through his appearance, tho only the version of him that he remembers best, which was the one back on earth...not the one that left him for the isles,
(Which def fuels even more why he didn’t appreciate luz insulting it, because it was basically also insulting the brother he’s trying so hard to recreate, the one that didn’t leave him)
This isn’t even out of character that philip likes to keep mementos of his brother, he even seems to have taken his old childhood mask his brother made him to the isles judging by his memories. Tho i’m sure the jacket holds more significance because it was caleb’s first specifically.
I think it’s definitely easy now to accuse Philip of every bad thing ever, and his obsession with his brother screams serious attachment issues. But it doesn’t appear he had that jacket on originally for anything but genuine love and care for him, at first at least.
There’s no evidence to suggest caleb told philip he was leaving, or any evidence that he even tried to talk to his brother about what was going on with him. As far as we know, he left, and philip, from his pov, went out to save the person he considers his entire world from what he believes might kill and/or hurt him.
And if philip wasn’t the villian of the show, i think a lot more people would be willing to sympathize with that part of his character.
His relationship with his brother has both a lot of resentment for leaving him behind and alone, but also a lot of the original love and admiration for him he held for years.
But with the knowledge he only became a hunter because he felt he needed to fit in with society for survival purposes, combined with the fact caleb was his only family and caretaker...while only being a few years older then him at the very least....you can see how this probably fueled so many of his issues.
Wanted to make a post about this cause while he deserves the crap for the bad stuff he actually does, it’s at least worth mentioning at one point he was just a naïve child raised in a bad community who originally just wanted to keep the one person he loved the most....safe.
and at one point, that jacket was not some morbid prize he got for what he did, or something he seemingly stole, or him trying to steal his brother’s look, it was originally just something he wore....because he did love him.
And to this day, he still kept it.
#the owl house#toh#emperor belos#philip wittebane#caleb wittebane#i think it;s important to hold him responsible for the things he did do and not the things we can confirm he didn't#not everything involving his brother seems to come from some evil energy#he was a child with only his brother to take care of him the fact he cares about him and is this attached isn't honestly that shocking tbh#he just ended up taking it to a MAX#tho yeah if my only family suddenly upped and left and started a new life and left me i'd hold some resentment too#he's at fault for what he did but TTT def sheds more light on why he ended up feeling this way in the first place for sure
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something I do appreciate about red vs blue is its particular brand of “came back wrong”. you were brought back, but you’re just a memory of the person you’re supposed to be. you’re just the expectations of them. you’re just the pieces everyone else saw and remembered. you’re tough like the original, but you’ll always fail no matter how tough you are, because the original failed, too. you’ve got a personality like the original, but it’s not quite right because you didn’t actually live the life they did. there’s this person you love- who you would kill or suffer or die for- but you don’t know why, you just know you’re supposed to be together because that’s what you were made for.
#thinkin abt tex and epsilon at 4am on a thursday#anyway thinkin about the fact that tex and church were never *actually* together outside of blood gulch#she tried to save alpha. she failed. he didn't know who she was and she was forced to leave him.#but realistically? he'd never met her before. because she wasn't allison and he wasn't leonard#they were both just copies that knew who they were supposed to be#and epsilon never met tex. he only had the copy based on alpha's muddled memories.#and then when he brought her back... she was just even more wrong because she was a memory of a memory#and even with all of alpha's memories#epsilon wasn't alpha. he was someone different because he'd been through different things#alpha didn't remember what was done to him. epsilon did. alpha didn't know what he'd lost. epsilon did.#alpha lived his life. had relationships with the reds and blues. epsilon just remembered it.#and with that in mind you have to wonder...#what did tex actually remember? who did she think she was? what did she think the director and alpha were to her?#because epsilon had alpha's memories but beta didn't even have that.#anyway yeah roommate agreed to experience rvb with me and we watched seasons 1-10 together and hooboy#I'm back on my bullshit#red vs blue#rvb#Agent Texas#tex rvb#Leonard Church#church rvb#epsilon rvb#alpha rvb#beta rvb
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ayoo guess who finally sat down and caught up with cultivate B)
is me. so you know what that means.
spoiler warning for cultivate ch 30-37
there was actually.... more things i wanted to draw but I already did so many I had to physically restrain myself hfsjkkdh anyway yes can you tell i love this fic very much
yet once again. cultivate by the wonderful @neonghostcat
#liushen#cultivate#cultivate: slow life on a monster infested mountain#mu qingfang#tagging him as well since theres lot of focus on him lol#and shen jiu as well u have to excuse me I love them they're meow meows#there was gonna be more sj content also but he ended up being cut in the end#wait- hdfdfhkj probably shouldnt talk about cutting something and SJ in the same sentence lmao jhfksdhfk ok bad joke sorry#anyway aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa absolutely deceased with all that has been revealed and covered in the past few chapter#actually dead wonderful powerful talented incredible showstopping never seen before#my most favourite part of cultive is its mysteries without a shadow of a doubt they're so intriguing and the reveal is ALWAYS sooo satisfyi#so the chain reaction of so many answers of the big ones tm? chefs kiss MWA#speaking of mysteries i never mentioned it before because I didn't know how to incorporate it without it being awkward but#for the longest time one particular piece of info has been rotting in my brain#and it was the off-hand comment on of the aqueduct by LQG#it is SO SILLY but THATS the one that has been just spinning in my brain FROM THEN ON ALL THE TIME it is indeed not the actually much coole#checkovs guns that have been setup nooo it was THIS hjkjsdfhksd I HAD TO KNOW where that was going AND NOW I KNOW I CAN REST EASY jsdhfkd#so yeah absolutely wonderful chapters indeed beautiful powerful#also some of you may noticed that time and time again I keep switching up the seniority between bai zhan and qian cao#and i have to formally apologize for that it is in fact not out of lack of attention to the text I'm just shdjkas#if im not mistaken qian caos position is not set in stone in canon so its free for grabs to put it in any of the free spots on the list#so i should respect neonghostcats (beloved i am so sorry) list in this case but i physically couldn't bring myself to write mqf as shidi#HSAJHS im sorry i am so biased and from doctors family i cannot put him in my head in peak seniority so low I'm sry i am legally not allowe#so lets just pretend i wrote it correctly ok sadhkas eyes closed xD#OOF th etags got long this time but im just SOOOO EXCITED WITH THIS FIC AND GOT FEELINGS OK BYE#anyway neonghostcat godspeed recovery buddy!!#also i hope using neonghostcat isnt like....calling u by your full name hdkfh but no idea to which parts i should shorten it either so hah
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currently thinking about unreliable narrator saiki kusuo, and the fact that if the manga was written from anyone else's perspective then everyone would see him as a tsundere stalker, borderline yandere..
#tsundere? absolutely without a doubt. stalker? yeah you actually just cant deny that. yandere? mmm debatably true.#obsessiveness/possessiveness/protectiveness that makes him act kinda abnormally or sometimes literally go into a violent episode..#yea thats just kinda a part of his character#but its not as severe as i think being an actual yandere implies#the thing that makes me think its close is the fact that he literally blacked out and had a violent episode back in elementary school#like he does genuinely care and think about other peoples feelings but in the moment of anger he literally lost control and had an episode#like he regretted it after but he still had an uncontrollable violent episode#and thats part of the reason he doesnt get close to people now..#yeah i dont think it's quite yandere but something close#idk why im actually talking about the logistics of kusuo saiki being a yandere sorry#damn it my beautiful princess with a disorder#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo#meows post
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Ugh everyone dunking on Steven are soooo cringe 🙄
Shane and Ryan are grown men who stood by this decision, so please dunk on them too lmao.
#watcher#sorry i think it's funny to dunk on steven and his tesla and expensive lifestyle and finance bro ways#i just think it's unfair to forget that they let him do that!!! they looked at that and went 'yeah i'll stand behind that'#so#let's dole out the dunking accordingly#but i do get why ppl hone in on steven specifically because like#the optics of going 'we're strapped for cash!!! anyway here's our new show about me traveling all over the world and eating gold!'#are not great good buddy ol' pal#they are in fact EXTREMELY hilarious#to be clear i'm not saying go and harass them#and in fact most that i've seen are people making the same sorts of gold-flake tesla jokes which i think are understandable#considering the aforementioned optics#i just think people hand-wringing over all the 'hate' steven gets are forgetting that he's living a life 90% of his audience can't afford#*because* of his audience#ALREADY#ya dig??
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I know you dont care about pesterquest but i wanna know, did you think they wrote eridan well or bad?
bad
#why would he care about shrek hes a hipster#also he cant just casually waltz into a movie theater hed scare the shit out of everyone there#like everyone else on alternia automatically assumes a sea dweller is going to want to kill you#eridans never done anything casually before in his life#even GAMZEE's internal narration goes 'better not stand on the beach for too long#if a sea dweller sees me theyll attack lol'#i know hes been memed to hell and back because hes a pathetic little meow meow but like#objectively eridan was fucking terrifying by alternian standards#even if he isn't actually like that inside he still LOOKED and ACTED the part#and also he did do all those murders yeah#like so many murders#like 'killin is all i evver done practically' levels of murders#vriska says her bodycount is in the 'many thousands' so eridan's deffo up there too#hes like objectively dangerous and scary#and the fact that the team forgot about this when it came to dealing with him pretty famously had disastrous results#anyway heres my eridancore movie rec: Once (2007)#i know 'hipster actually likes mainstream stuff' is a Trope and theres truth to it but like look at me in the eyes#do you really mean to tell me eridan “wizard and magic are stupid and fake but i have 6 wizard statues in my room” ampora#is going to be the hipster that admits that he likes mainstream stuff
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why do people think Yevgeny wasn't Mickey's son? in 3x06 there was clearly no condom used (not that Terry probably would have let Svetlana stop to get one), but there's no reason to think she wasn't using condoms with her regular clients. it's not Svetlana's fault that she was a tool used to rape Mickey—the sole blame for everything that happens in that entire situation belongs to Terry Milkovich and him alone—so why does it feel like it's just another way for people to shit on Svetlana for something that wasn't in her control? it's not as though she'd asked to get pregnant in the first place...
#stop giving svetlana shit just because terry was one of her clients—between him and sasha do you really think she had a chance to say no?#her attitude towards mickey is s4 is very easy to understand when you think about the fact that a) she's his age or maybe a year older#b) she is a person who knows she has to take what life gives her and make the best of bad situations#c) her entire future rests (so she thinks) on her and mickey making their marriage work and he was absorbed in ian (which the audience gets#but svet has no context for) and thus her feeling threatened is very understandable because mickey also won't stand up to his father#so yeah of course svet is gonna see terry as the one person who will put things the way they're supposed to be#but! it's after mickey comes out and he and ian fight everyone in the bar that she realizes mickey could be an ally to her#and she extends a hand in friendship because they're both stuck in this situation and yeah of course she wants him to stop being stupid#about yev—as she puts it “baby did not choose this either” which leads me to think she understands mickey's situation a little better now#but yev looks so much like mickey and has those big blue eyes of his (also evidence for baby mickey being blond)#I get that the whole child from rape thing isn't fun for mickey to have to deal with but women have to go through it all the time—like Svet#okay rant over I'm sorry I'm just...it puts a bad taste in my mouth whenever I see it in fic or meta that yev can't *possibly* be mickey's#mickey milkovich#svetlana yevgenivna#yevgeny milkovich#shameless
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Ranting about Nucani
There is something I want to express and this fandom should know.
Nu: Carnival is a Harem game but unlike most games in the genre the relationships with MC are all canon within the same story, there are no "Routes", no "Alternate Universe/Timelines", it's all 1 Main Story where you get to gradually meet all the Characters who'll be your companions, in this game named Clan members, and all of them one way or another end up falling for Eiden (MC), which makes polyam relationship canon with Eiden as the center:
Like very few games have polyam representation, let alone a positive one, like yes the polycule it's very Eiden central but even then all the Clan Members interact with one another, as we see mainly in the time limited Events but also in the Main Story, and have friendly and amicable interactions, they rely on one another sometimes even without Eiden being involved.
But also, Aster and Morvay have a relationship established too since way before the events of the prologue of the game, Kuya and Quincy have hinted some sort of situationship (idk I don't care about Quincy and my knowledge about Kuya is limited to what happens in the story and events cause I have no limited SSRs nor have I read any of his Intimacy Rooms).
[Also if any of you knows of any other relationship that have been hinted at that i'm missing feel free to share, i specifically ask of you to refer to only canon, i know in fanon anything and everything is possible and sometimes we may be missperceiving some interactions between characters so i ask of you to take those rose tinted glasses off and see unfiltered canon, it's hard for me too ngl so dw]
All this started with some posts I saw about ppl feeling bad for Yakumo and/or Edmond to be "forced into a polyam relationship" when they are the "most romantic members" and "deserve a monogamous relationship", their words not mine, as if mono > poly , but also do you really think they're against it!?
One thing is being Clan Members against their will (which is all Huey's fault btw), having to work together to regulate the Altars' Essence (or their own) and then another one completely is involving themselves in a personal and intimate way with Eiden, which the latter they all did in their own terms and out of free will.
Also i wanna share one of the best and my fav scenes with Karu, which i know not everyone was able to experience it cause it's hidden in the Intimacy Rooms of a Limited SSR, but it expresses exactly why the polycule is consensual.
Context: Eiden has been worrying about forcing the Clan Members to be with him because he is the New Grand Sorcerer, against their will just because of Huey's magic that ties them together and the responsibility of Regulating the Altars and basically maintaining stability in the Klein Continent.
His worries began (at least that i noticed) in "Eerie Escapade" (Halloween Event), that was also the first time Garu got hurt while protecting Eiden and the first time Karu got mad at him and fronted to yell at Eiden (which is my another fav scene of Karu omg i love him so much i gotta go back and take screenshots of that but that's for another post), the second one being in "Army x Blood x Oath" (which are the screenshots i'll show u)
Because this are the Intimacy Rooms of Garu/Karu's Limited SSR this scene focuses on Eiden feeling guilty because Garu got hurt in the past (Halloween Event) and this time he lost his memory (temporarily, due to this event's story) and Eiden blaming himself for it all and wondering if they would be better off without him, but the same can and is applied to the rest of the Clan Members, seeing how Eiden met and approached Rei while respecting his privacy and independency even tho he's also a Clan Member and the newest introduced in the story, means that the Limited Events are also canon and part of the story because Eiden seems to be growing and learning from previous Events and showing that development in future Events and the Main Story.
Karu also mentions that Garu (prior to losing his memories) was also worrying about the same thing Eiden was, like 'what if Master (Eiden) stays with us just because of the contract with Huey? :c' and he calls them both idiots because they don't communicate and fronts to fix it! (Mighty Karu to the rescue)
And talking about "Eerie Escapade" that is also the event where Yakumo's possessiveness towards Eiden shows, i'll admit i haven't seen the last room but i feel like those people i mentioned before are using it as fuel to their idea, because if Yakumo is jealous of other Clan Members interacting with Eiden and "Wants him all to himself" that must mean he wants a monogamous relationship, right?
WRONG!
That just means Yakumo is a complex person that feels different emotions specially when it comes to the most important person in his life (Eiden) other than his grandparents!
And Yakumo feels guilty for having those feelings, not because of them being in a polycule and he not wanting to be in it, but because he has trauma and sees his desires and wants as selfishness and he would never allow himself to be selfish cause he doesn't want to hurt people, he's a people's pleaser! He lives with constant fear of hurting others like the Great Serpent did when it killed many (but apparently there may be more that meets the eye, because the current event hinted that the Great Serpent actually liked humans and took care of children ???)
And Yakumo dealing with those feelings along with his yokai powers as a descendant of The Great Serpent have been the main topic of his last 3 Limited SSRs, which is great because that means CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT~
Now unfortunately i cannot talk about Edmond's Intimacy Rooms as i'm missing ALL OF HIS SSRs (why do you hate me Edmond if ily) but from what i've seen he's also pretty happy being with Eiden, heck even HIS MOM is happy his son is with Eiden!
That's right, she's the first and only parent of the Clan Members that knows and approves of their relationship, if it weren't because most of them are orphan we could get many more... i wonder if Yakumo's grandparents are aware hmmm ... and we all know Olivine's parents are gonna HATE it xD and maybe Garu's wolf pack will approve of Eiden by the end of this event.
#i just realized i may not be the right person to talk about polyam relationships and representation#even if i'm open to polyamory while in a monogamous relationship currently#and i do my best to do my research about it and learn from polyam people#but then again i used to do the same with queer people before finding out i was queer#and neurodiverse people before realizing i am one too#and the most recent was autism :D#so maybe i'm not the wrong person to talk about it#also if any of you treat Garu and Karu as the same person when they're a system i will lose it#or worse when people don't acknowledge Karu#help me i love these pups with my life and i will protect them#aster and morvay relationship's nature is not for us to decide#but the fact is that they have one#nu carnival#nucani#canon polyamory#if you read all this i love you~#edit: i thought Morvay having multiple sex partner was obvious 🤔#but some ppl pointed it out so#yeah#the incubus has sex with many ppl besides Eiden and Aster all consensual#while Aster finds it annoying but also helpful Eiden think it's hot#big edit: nvm I AM THE RIGHT PERSON to talk about this as im ambiamorous#which means im happy both in a monoam and polyam relationships#so i am in the polyam spectrum and would love to have what these boys have
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Kalina is the most interesting character to me because of all she has going on…
she is Cassandra’s familiar, she is simultaneously a pet and a friend and a servant and a family to a goddexx that is simultaneously her owner and friend and creator and parent and her god and reason to be—Kalina’s relationship to Cassandra is hard to put a name or label on (since what does being a familiar even mean?) but the bottomline is that this cat loves her deity enough to put everything and everyone on the line for her…
And adding in that she is a child of divorce. So to speak. I am extremely normal and haven’t been driven mad by the detail that baby itty bitty kitty Kalina was at Cassandra’s wedding to Ankarna and is remembered to have been toddling after her as she walked down the aisle…
Kalina will be the death of me /lh
#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year#kalina#oh my god and the fact Kalina was there at that wedding—there at the period of time where Ankarna was alive and still a known god and not#presumed dead… this makes the Sylvairean Heresy even WORSE of a life event for Kalina and Cassandra…#the existence of baby kalina implies that Cassandra *raised* Kalina… and the fact they were married means that Kalina wouldn’t have been#raised by only Cassandra but *also* Ankarna.#you are Kalina and one of your parents just was killed by your uncle—their domains were too alike—and you can never talk about them again.#you can never speak their name—share in their memory—the only place they exist is quietly in your memories that must go unspoken due to#Oblivata Mori. And there’s nothing you can do about it…#And then the followers and clerics of your remaining parent start trying to kill her—being mislead by the followers of your goddexx’ sister#Cassandra is the only family Kalina has left—and Kalina’s sentience leds me to think she agreed to become a Curse#kalina let herself be unmade and changed to keep Cassandra alive… and even as the shell of herself—a familiar once but now a living plague—#is so deeply loyal and only interested in what is to the benefit of her *everything*… even if they are currently a Walking Corpse.#Kalina dislike Kristen so much because Kristen is just not being a good cleric and is in the precarious spot of being Cassandra’s only#follower… but ultimately won’t harm or attack Kristen—killing herself first—because Kristen is the only one keeping Cassandra uncorrupted.#yeah im crazy about the relationship and history between a cat familiar and her witch goddess and the layers of their relationship
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hey do y'all ever think about the fact that Charles probably has told Edwin about being beaten as a child at some point during their 34 years of friendship? And that Edwin likely never found it remarkable enough to ask further questions because back when he was alive, beating children was completely normal
#charles nonchalantly brings up his bad childhood to crystal all the time & he's literally just met her#i find it hard to imagine he never mentioned it to edwin#& i can just imagine edwin being like whomst among us hasn't been whipped as a child haha no need to inquire further#this is normal#like when he was alive teachers were allowed and a courage to bear their students#i can guarantee edwin was beaten as a kid too but it was just. fact of life. so that's why he's blindsided by how badly charles's#experiences w abuse scarred him#'oh yeah we all experience terrifying painful and humiliating punishments as we grow up. and we are all fine! 🙂'#like it seems so on brand to me that he would know - maybe not the true extend but some of it at least - but based on his own experience#think it was one of these things One Just Doesn't Talk About#he's such a compassionate kind hearted person who grew up in such a fucked up society#dead boy detectives
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stultifera navis rerun AKA thinking about Iberia hours again because a lot of the Iberians have such fascinating relationships with the concept of home but specifically Thorns and Lumen are eating at my brain. like where do you call home when the place that is your home Just Fucking Hates You? Elysium's rewinding breeze specifically makes a point to hammers home how differently Iberia treats its Liberi and its Aegir
(which is especially interesting since this comes right after a conversation where Purestream commented on how despite Leizi being a high ranking government official, there are still some experiences that are universal for all Yanese people - because the experience of what Iberia itself is like isnt universal for all Iberians)
But all that being said, Thorns also straight up states that Aegir is not his home, and yeah, how could it be? How could a place you've never been to, never truly known, ever be your home? How could it ever feel like a home?
so where do you go when the place that you are from hates your people and the place your people are from is completely unfamiliar and alien to you? Thorns' answer at the end of the conversation with Aya is: my home is where i chose it to be. my home is where there are people I care about and people who care about me
in the complete opposite direction, Lumen's oprec asks: why do you still stay in a place that wants you gone? because the people of Gran Faro like Jordi well enough but when push comes to shove, they will want the only Aegir in town gone
and yet, when Rald the messenger offers him a chance to leave Jordi turns him down and when he's forced to escape Gran Faro after the people there literally try to send him to his death (or worse) at the hands of the Inquisitors he keeps trying to go back because like everyone in stultifera navis, Jordi is clinging to his own dreams of a golden age
but the shape of that dream is unique to every character and for Jordi, his dreams are deeply, inseparably bound to the Eye of Iberia, the legacy his parents left behind
and it's this dream of becoming someone great, of bringing about that golden age that his parents devoted their lives to help create that ties Jordi to this nothing town because despite everything, despite the mistrust of the townsfolk and the hostility of the Inquisition and the danger from the ocean, he simply cannot leave it behind
(or, because i personally dislike the official translation,)
"I just see this place as my home"
so yeah. not sure what overall point i was trying to make here i'm just. deeply in love with these stories about chosing what is and isn't your home, of saying you will not call a place your home because it has given you no reason to or saying you consider a place your home even though it has given you every reason not to. deeply unwell about them <3
#arknights#asto speaks#not much of an essay writer i just keep thinking about them and i need to force other people to think about them too#thorns story fucks me up bc like. this whole almost found family adjacent idea of like#maybe home isnt something decided by your birth but something you can chose based on what truly matters to you#it just gets to me. i guess.#jordi gets to me in a completely different direction there's nothing personal about it i just find his story *fascinating*#just a guy. a completely normal guy. an absolute nobody caught up in these dreams of greatness while also fully aware of his own normalcy#but never letting either of those overshadow the other. never losing that self awareness or that fuckin obsessive determination#god. what a Character#i love jordi so much like genuinely#i joke a lot about him being just a Guy but thats also kinda like the best thing about him#the fact that he is the way that he is and does all the things he does despite being just a Guy#gently holds#for context i was so hyped about new iberia lore when sn was announced i read the whole thing as soon as it dropped on cn server#cuz someone uploaded all the story sections to bilibili right after it came out#and '我只是把这里当作自己的故乡啊' fucking hit me SO HARD#in like the greater context of elysium demanding to know why hes risking his life in like 5 different ways to return to gran faro#because yeah jordi just doesnt want to leave his home but like we the audience knows the full *weight* of what that home means to him#and the weight of the dreams that made him chose to see Gran Faro as his home and to refuse to let go of that#thats why i like the original a lot more than the translation i think like it really emphasises that active *choice*.#this is the place jordi has *decided* to see as his home and he knows what that means and what it means to him#side note the part on thorns might not actually age well depending on whether hg decides to ever release more aulus lore#i mean i'll gladly take the L if it means more aulus and/or thorns lore like#i just wanna know what (if anything) is tying him to iberia yknow#ak#iberiaposting
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