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trunkzbriefs · 4 years

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Any Son and/or Briefs family headcanons? Spicy hot takes? Truths Toriyama and Toyotaro themselves can not handle? Straight up lies?

GODDAMN SORRY this took a while cause i suck at putting thoughts together. i apologize for my obvious briefs bias i have more hcs for them than the son family despite loving them both :pensive: anyway heres some random stuff

briefs hcs:

all of the briefs are pros at non-verbal communication. i hc that saiyans have their own language (and also in my own Mind Canon they still have their fuckin tails) and a lot of it is done through tail movement/body posture/grunts/etc. etc so theyve all sort of picked that up. even bulma, who doesnt have a tail, is pretty good at getting across what she means without actually speaking. they still do speak normally but it comes in handy sometimes considering that both trunks and vegeta are prone to running out of speaking energy or getting very frustrated with words, so having another way to communicate works very well for them

vegeta is fffffffffffffffffffurry. without getting too deep into my own General Saiyan hcs (thats why i made a whole ass four subspecies!!) i think that the entirety of planet vegeta tended to be very hot aside from the part where the castle was, where the temperature would drop. meaning that saiyans working in the palace would grow thicker fur around certain parts of their body, and in the royal saiyans theyd be Especially fluffy. he kept it down on earth, but he has thick patches of fur around the bottom parts of his arms and legs. kind of like snowy boots and gloves! he also has fur that grows in on his neck like a lions mane.

future trunks is an actions sponge, vegeta is a words sponge. vegeta will pick up words VERY quickly regardless if he fully understands the meaning of it or not (completely inspired by 'THATS RIGHT BOYS... MONDO COOL' in z) and future trunks will unintentionally mimic the actions of people - around people he looks up to he might take a few small mannerisms from but this extends to copying the disposition of anyone; he's just very adaptive. this is the most obvious (and funniest) when he's around vegeta bc it really shows like. yeah damn that sure is vegeta's son

vegeta & bulla have an intimidating bastard smirk naturally. their natural smiles are pretty frightening and they have to put effort into a 'normal' one. this also extends to current trunks, his default smile is the Vegeta Bastard Smirk but he learned to have a normal smile quicker than his father and sister. future trunks has a slightly unnerving natural smile (the fact that his pupils are always drawn so fucking small makes me hc that he just has a very intimidating look of 'cat thats about to pounce on an unfortunate trapped mouse' whenever he smiles) but he learned to look normal even quicker than current trunks since he's around humans a Lot and is sort of their uh, Hope. don't want to look scary to the people who depend on you!

bulma has some fighting knowledge and mildly good ki control. vegeta taught her it as a just in case so that she'd be able to defend herself against Bigger threats if he wasn't there and also so she could raise her own ki to alert someone to her if she had to.

vegeta is extremely clean and can not stand to have things disorganized for more than like... an hour before he has to tidy everything up. every time he goes down to the lab and bulma is passed out in a pile of bolts and circuit boards it kills him inside just a little bit

future trunks has little concept of power control. since his timeline was always in danger it wasn't really an important thing for him to learn. the amount of mugs he's accidentally crushed is impressive

vegeta tends to not sound like he's asking questions when he is. he doesn't add the proper infliction to the end of his questions and just sounds flat most of the time. it's confusing to people who dont know him well.

im not even gonna lie, im a BIG fan of the chill demon panchy headcanon so i love the idea that the briefs have a Lil bit of demon in them but just dont know it ghjnkm

[banging my fists on the 'hcs that not even got could take away from me' table] future trunks has OCD

vegeta doesn't really get labels but he's bisexual & "debatably a man", bulma is bisexal & bigender transfem (sometimes shes Wamen and other times its like "gender? no"), bulla is a nonbinary lesbian, current trunks is a bisexual trans man & future bulma forgot to explain the concept of gender and sexuality to future trunks so he's a little confused on that front and his gender & sexuality are "i have literally never thought abt these concepts in my life but i think men are nice. i refuse to think about gender though" (i actually have two main hcs for future trunks which are either gay trans man or more-feminine-presenting nonbinary bisexual)

son hcs:

goku is Not as fluffy as vegeta at all, but he does have fur on certain parts of his body. namely on the back of his elbows + ankles, down his back connecting to his tail, and on his shoulders. its inherented from gine!

gohan is learning saiyan language from vegeta! vegeta acts grumpy about it but he's glad to have someone to teach. when gohan learned that most of the history had been lost he basically wished shenron for a big ol book on saiyan culture and gave it to vegeta just as an act of kindness and vegeta was like [in an angry voice but very touched] "Ok. Sit down. You're learning." by extension gohan is also teaching the rest of his family!

i will take ox king being actually non-human to my grave so like, chichi has horns and a very short ox tail! gohan and goten both have horns, but they're hidden by hair. goten's horns are bigger than gohans.

goten also has a more ox-like tail, with a little puff of fur at the end. generally, gohan looks more saiyan-like and goten looks more ox/human-like.

although he keeps up his cheery demeanor very well, goku is still haunted pretty badly by like... everything that’s happened in his life. he still has frequent nightmares about cell & buu specifically.

gohan will freak out at worse, zone out at best, if he's even tapped on the neck. it reminds him of the whole 'getting his neck snapped on namek' so that area is pretty off limits to everyone

goten gets along really well with android 17. they both have a love for nature and 17s kind of like his chill uncle, so whenever he gets too stressed out or just needs a break you can find him face down on the ground outside of 17's place on monster island.

goku is really really good at remembering completely random shit. bulma uses this to her advantage whenever she's working and has him memorize random technology stuff. a week later goku can not remember what he had for breakfast that morning but as soon as bulma asks "hey do you remember what i told you last week" hes like "oh yeah sure i have no idea what it means but [blurts out three hours worth of technical garble]"

oh boy is this a headcanon that has a lot more depth to it than just a bullet on a tumblr post, but gohan has DID!

goku, like vegeta, doesnt get labels either, and does not even Try, ask him about any of it and hes like "i dont get the gender thing but i think lots of people look nice :)" gohan is gay and like vegeta, "debatably a man", goten + chichi are both bi nonbinary, & pan is a lesbian trans woman.

both:

bulla and pan are both into music! i think theyd mess around making their own stuff w/ launchpads

i have a general hc of ki mixing or shielding, essentially, if youre close enough to someone people wont be able to tell apart your ki and you can also 'shield' someone with your ki for a small amount of time. if vegeta has his energy low, his and bulma's energy are the same. same thing with goku and chichi! goten and trunks are near impossible to tell apart, and same thing with gohan and videl.

though goten and trunks are both protective over their younger siblings, gotenks is that protectiveness times a thousand. look at bulla or pan wrong for 2 seconds and you're going to have an angry gotenks in your face asking if you have any last words. i like to think that trunks and goten fused casually a lot, especially around the time where bulla and pan were young, so its basically goten and trunks own attachment to them PLUS gotenks' attachment to them as his own person combined.

i like to pretend end of z did not happen the way it did so uub, using nimbus, travels back and forth a lot. goku isn’t the only one who teaches him how to fight as goten, gohan and trunks all think of him like a little brother and love training with him!

fuck you letters to toriyama/toyotaro hot takes:

cell, as cool of a villian as he is, definitely should have had a creepier final form. or multiple- just something that really drives in the fact that he's made up of other's dna & fuckin ABSORBS people. also his first two forms should have had a different absorbtion method other than the tail thing (not the drinking thing thats fine) it just feels. Weird. not good

it would have been far more interesting to keep the bitter attitude towards vegeta that future trunks had imo... in super trunks was going through a Lot granted but the fact tht he wasnt more confrontational to vegeta being a dick to him seemed kind of off considering his attitude in z i just.. think it would be interesting and far better if they had more of a back and forth 'family but lowkey hate each other' relationship

i dont want to rant about super so heres some super condensed takes, goku black arc specific because thats 90% of what ive seen of super:

mai is a fucking freak ass weirdo, why did they not just make another character to pair with trunks

trunks not flipping the fuck out at his timeline being erased feels... out of character. also trunks deserved the win against zamasu

future bulma did NOT need to die

trunks should have just stayed in the current timeline

please fucking let trunks and goten grow up. we SAW a version of trunks who looked 14 (history of trunks....) and the versions of goten & trunks we have r/n in super do not look 13/14 respectively what in the goddamn hell is going on in the character design department

super definitely should have taken place later down the line

supers version of bulma and videl look awful. why are they That stick like.

vegeta needs to kill frieza. just once.

fu has enough potential to be a very interesting mainline character and i am so sad he's not

i would actively enjoy a sdbh anime with more budget that isnt just a promo anime and has a plot that makes sense... i think db should have more wild spinoffs

xenoverse deserved a better story that went FULL in on the 'what if' type of timelines- like they did in raging blast which is a FUCKING GREAT GAME

straight up lies:

dragon ball z is a good series

#yes db is my hyperfix. that doesnt mean its good <3 but its mine now and i make whatever i want canon #long post #fleetinginterest

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ohoshi · 3 years

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yess the part where johnny bumped into taeyong was cool!! ty looks so cool while performing gosh 😌 i think ive watched that nct u class performance so many times by now, im still not over it for some reason hahaha

OMG I KNOW XIAOJUN BEING RELEVANT!! YES!! honestly im so glad that during nct 2020 a lot of the wayv members got to show their skills and how theyve improved (like xiaojun, hendery, yangyang) and i hope this keeps going (i feel like winwin esp couldve been showcased more? maybe it's hard with soo many members and i dont wanna be *that* fan...but he was the leader of the 90s love unit and had like 2 lines lol)

omg yes shotaro!! you never couldve known he debuted just 2 MONTHS AGO but i agree even in maw u can tell that the boy got moves! i feel so proud of him and hes so cute 😊 i agree, sign me up too for the idols who have such duality!! they were all so good (as expected)!!

WAIT LMAO SO SORRY i just fact checked myself and haikyuu actually has 4 seasons 😂 😅 there was like a 4 year gap between s3 and s4 so i think i felt like it was 2 seasons lmaoo. lately i have been more okay watching ongoing shows bc it gives me something to look forward to every week! but i usually do binge shows, which is why im a little sad that the uncanny counter is ongoing so i am forced to wait 😭 i must say though my binging skills are amazing...my one talent in life 🤣

her private life is another fake relationship kdrama (the main girl character is a fangirl and she runs a blog for her bias ahaha relatable??), and i think crash landing on you has some fake relationship things?? obviously it's not the main focus of the drama but crash landing is iconic u gotta watch, be prepared to cry tho if you get emotional watching these things like me 😭 because this is my first life was also good (i've heard some ppl get frustrated by the main guy character's lack of emotion though but i liked the writing and it's worth giving it a shot if you want!) i love the fake relationship and the enemies to lovers tropes, so if you come across any that are good pls let me know hehe

SVT yes that part in home where they choreographed like a house imagery with their hands was so cool!! the choreo is just so detailed (like i think there was a part that looked like they were opening a door bc it's "home"), i had heard svt is self produced and thats so amazing! theyre so talented and their performances are so good (the ones i've seen so far). i watched their mafia dance video for left and right and it was so FUNNY HAHAHAA they seem so chaotic i love it (also i love the mafia dances in general lol like nct dream did it for we go up). i'm going to try to learn svt's names (which i usually do by just watching crack videos about the group on youtube lmao) so stay tuned 👀 coming from nct, 13 members doesnt even seem like a lot to me anymore hahaha and i think im usually good with names so we'll see! i am also curious to see if i end up stanning dino :)) who are your svt biases??

haha yes i can understand xj/hn/lc without subtitles!! it's interesting because i think all 3 of them are from different places so their canto actually sounds a bit different from each other! but when i hear wayv speaking canto it feels so familiar bc i really only speak cantonese with my family, and it's such a weird but also good feeling and it makes me feel warm :) wayv is the unit that feels like ur close friends (whereas dreamies have best chemistry and i think i like 127’s music most? (but ofc i do actually like all the units songs hahah))

🥺yeah me too! i’m glad wayv members became more relevant thanks to nct 2020! honestly they are soooo good and they deserve all the attention! and winwin 💔 honestly i’m so happy he is in wayv now where he is being appreciated more! where he gets the lines and screentime! he deserves it 😤 of course you’re gonna be *that* fan! we’re all *that* fan 😤 the leader of the unit got 2 lines 😤 smh 😤

omg 4 year gap???? that’s a lot 😳 what for?? i guess the 4 year gap is the reason the show is still airing after all these years lmao when i saw gifs on my dash my reaction was wtf when did haikyuu become one piece what have i missed and then i googled and saw that the anime has 80+ episodes????? ABOUT VOLLEYBALL???? 😳 WILD

ohhh i see you have something to look forward to hmm that makes sense? maybe i should try it, especially since it’s most likely not as consuming as binge watching!! but yeah same, binge watching tv shows is one of my talents 😏

her private life is about a girl who runs a blog about her bias? there’s a whole kdrama about me? are you kidding me rn? never knew someone would be inspired by me or us for that matter? since we’re both just two little human beings running a blog about their biases<3 OMGGGG when am i gonna get the time to watch all of these drama 😭 hopefully really soon, but knowing how busy my college life can be (and esp rn) probs not 🤕 if i ever come across any drama that you haven’t watched already i will most likely recommend it to you!!!!

AHDGAGHFSDGH i love when idols play mafia game of any kind and i think that svt’s left and right is my favorite mafia dance ajfdshgadfshga they’re so chaotic and funny and omg vernon was so good tho?????? 😳 i was impressed bc i could never lie so well ahgdfags yeah it’s not that hard to remember all 13 of them especially because all of them are so different (i mean all of the members in all of the groups are always so different but ajdsgakja for whatever reason svt to me seemed the most uhhh versatile from the others?? like for example woozi is so smol it’s easy to remember him, and then seungkwan is the loud one, and then mingyu and jeonghan are pretty ones, joshua the charming one, sweet one, my biases are the best<3 etc but i mean THIS COULD BE JUST ME AJDGAJSH maybe i’m just too biased bc i love them so much sigh) anyways,,,,,, there’s a lot of ICONIC SVT CONTENT SO ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ welcome we have cookies, relax and enjoy yourself, the ride to being 500% whipped for svt begins right here, i recommend to you their pot and hammer game bc i love to watch when idols play it and svt? CHAOTIC AS ALWAYS!

OK MY SVT BIASES 🥺 ok first of all here’s a digression: usually when i get into a kpop group i have like 3 different positions, 1) love at first sight - which is the person who i’m attracted to right from the second?? like the first person i see and i’m like oh //they// kinda like the way you’re attracted to dino’s dancing and stuff; 2) first bias - which is the person i just pick for whatever reason //ok they’re gonna be my bias//; 3) the actual bias - after watching a lot of content and listening to the music and getting to know the group in general i then choose //THE BIAS// or rather the bias chooses me bc it’s out of my control i just love them whoever they are! and with svt 🥺 all of the 3 were one guy (the only other time this happened to me is w nct dream lmao) 🥺 and i love him so much! one and only: xu minghao! (aka the8) 🥰 he’s one of the lead dancers and 1/2 china line in svt and he can sing! he can rap! and boy can he dance 😭 i just 🥺 love him 🥺 my other svt bias (whom, tbh, i don’t love nearly as much as i love minghao but i still love him very much<3) is wen junhui! (aka jun) 🥰 he is the other lead dancer and 2/2 china line in svt (this is random: but i really love china line in kpop??? like idek why? i mean of course i don’t care about their nationality or whatever but i’ve just noticed that for whatever reason the ones i tend to love and bias are more often than not chinese) and i know i know you asked ‘hey cora who are your svt biases??’ and everything i was supposed to say was ‘hey santa it’s the8 and jun!’ but no i had to be EXTRA bc guess what? well I AM EXTRA!!! bc i got excited i really love them 😭 (esp minghao<3 lately he’s been my ultimate bias so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

OMG I AM SO JEALOUS OF YOU RN? you can understand them without titles? lucky!!!!!! but the fact that it feels familiar and it makes you feel warm<3 is so precious<3 so cute!! so wayv feels like home? 🥺 bc you only speak cantonese with your family? this is so 🥺 i’m not crying you’re crying 🥺 teach me something in cantonese?? like?? actually, first tell me is it too different from mandarin??? and then teach me something? how do i say i love you? or hi and bye lmao and thank you? yk the basics! and i mean of course that we all love all units songs i mean!! we’re here for all the mess those 23 boys give us but!! i think i’d be biased and pick nct dream’s music<3 but i love wayv and 127 so much as well 😭

#ss20 #wo ai ni<3 #until you teach me the canto way #literally have no idea how much different they're supposed to be i'm sorry #in my country we have dialects #but it's the same words #i guess just the accents are different and some other things but #the words are the same #but i have no idea what it's like in the rest of the world #i guess for foreigners even dialects in my country could sound like a completely different language????????

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gendryw4ters-blog · 7 years

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a couple skip/penk headcanons that i cant stop thinking about

these are for you @snowmedics my love (and also thank you for helping with some of em in that chat the other day!!) and also!! are set in the same universe/time/etc as this piece i did the other day. they might be a lil dumb too but i believe in them nonetheless;

they lived together as friends before they started dating, and so the living situation has remained pretty much the same with only a few minor changes, like:

both of them still have their separate cupboards and halves of the fridge except now it’s slightly more of a big deal when they steal or “borrow” from the other’s (”i just cannot BELIEVE you would eat the last of my fruit loops like. like i expected this from you as a friend but we’re so much more than that now and honestly? i’m hurt. i’m betrayed. i’m reconsidering this entire relationship” “babe those were mine and you moved them into your cupboard yesterday when you thought i wasnt looking” “thAT MIGHT BE TRUE BUT STILL”)

they have a spare room now. they decided it would be easier to move into skip’s since his was the biggest, and so penk’s got turned into a room where friends could stay and also a place where they could finally house their shrine to dwayne ‘the rock’ johnson. it’s a modest shrine, and one that started out as a joke but then accidentally became an integral part of their life when penk took his name in vain in a tipsy rant about the casting of tom cruise in the new mummy film. skip never let it go. (the shrine stays up even when they have visitors, and while it makes most of them uncomfortable to some degree, malarkey stays over so often that he now sometimes feels uncomfortable sleeping WITHOUT the rock watching over him and keeping him safe)

it’s actually so much tidier than you’d maybe expect. it’s lived in, sure, but they do their best to keep it neat. it was messier when they were just friends- and skip often makes jokes about how dating has turned them both into domestic goddesses and penk just smiles warmly because yeah maybe that is true but also he wouldnt change the set up they have now for the world

other relationship-y things:

they have SUCH a loving and wholesome dynamic though perhaps not in the most conventional sense, like they have this kind of humour between them that to an outsider might verge on mean but between them is just another way of showing love. nothing is ever Too Serious, they’re on a level of comfort and intimacy that they can literally just say anything and the other will instantly know what they mean. the humour and love just rolls off of their tongues, snappy retorts to dumb comments being used in place of simpering sweet nothings, and it’s dry but not always deadpan- with a lot of exaggerated movements and playful slaps to the arm and things like that

they'll sometimes throw more shade at each other than at other people, but when they ARE throwing it at others its a whole different game of subtle hand brushing like "hey iiiiii think theyre being an asshole we're going to analyse this later" and loud conversations like "well i know i wouldnt let YOU act like that in public babe" and they’ll gossip about it later over wine and takeaway pizza at home

dumb or strange late night conversations are!! commonplace because skip sometimes takes a long time falling asleep, and even if penk IS 90% asleep he can’t resist joining in because he loves skip so he still ends up mumbling back like “i dont think youre ever gonna be able to fuck sean bean, no babe” and they have such in depth discussions over the most ridiculous things like whether liam neeson would appreciate an aquarium date or not but also!! chats about life and shows they watch and just about anything because theyre in love and also best friends and they can be real with each other no matter what

they also!! watch a lot of cartoons. they watch other shows too but cartoons especially have become a source of comfort for them if theyve had a not so good day or “simply cant be fucked with trying to work out what’s gong on in [insert movie that’s not even that difficult to comprehend but penk’s just too lazy to even try]”. they’ll sit around in their underwear and eat cereal and stream them for hours

late night shopping trips!! are absolutely a thing. they’ll ride the cart up and down the aisles and end up buying a bunch of junk they dont really need and always have a good time doing it

there’s almost always music playing in the flat if they’re not chatting or watching tv, it’s on quietly in the background because skip doesnt like total silence and penk sometimes likes to pull him up to dance (casually grabbing him on his way past to finish cleaning the kitchen or whatever he’s doing and spinning him around and kissing him on the nose). it’s not ALWAYS memey music though they do both know pretty much all of the dance routines to all of the late 90s early 00s classics and still sometimes teach themselves new ones on tipsy saturday nights (and use them to cheer each other up!! as with the macarena in that thing i did)

HELLO SORRY I HAVE BEEN RAMBLING FOR QUITE SOME TIME NOW GOOD ON YA IF YOU MADE IT THE ENTIRE WAY THROUGH AND ALSO I COULD PROBABLY GO ON ABOUT THESE TWO FOREVER AND EVER <3

#my headcanons #under a readmore cause! theyre lengthy #skip/penk #WHATS THEIR SHIPNAME #because i see #muckala #skipenk #like whats the dealio fam #btw all of the late night conversations referenced are ones ive actually had #the liam neeson one was an argument with jack over who was more dateable him or rowan atkinson #and i appreciate rowan really i do BUT i just. id take liam neeson out #we'd go to the aquarium or maybe on a nice hike through the woods and just chat and then get coffee afterwards and it wouldnt even have to #be overtly flirtatious. itd just be nice. company and coffee what more could ya want #these arw LONG and maybe wrong but !! come at me with others because i love skip/penk and i want all the content you have

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narcisbolgor-blog · 6 years

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Pamela Anderson Defends Assange and Putin: Everything Is So Anti-Russia

Pamela Anderson would like to set the record straight.

The Baywatch icon turned ardent activist has grown close to WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange in recent years, which has led to rampant speculation about the nature of their relationship. She thinks its crazy that theyve been linked romantically and speaks fondly of her actual beau, Marseille footballer Adil Rami; she doesnt believe theres a link between Julian and Russia; she is adamant that Julian represents everything America does when it comes to true information and freedom of speech; and she has not been asked to participate in the Mueller investigation, and would prefer not to speculate about whether she would.

On a sunny June afternoon, Anderson paid a visit to The Daily Beasts New York office to discuss her partnership with the National Limousine Associations Ride Responsibly initiative, whose aim is to promote safety awareness in ride-hailing apps like Uber. Its only the latest in a long line of endeavors for the 51-year-old, whos been sounding the alarm on animal rights and environmental protection since the 90s. She also wrote a letter to former President Obama arguing for the legalization of marijuana and has recently, through her Pamela Anderson Foundation, supported activists and whistleblowers around the world.

These days, shes traded Malibu for Marseillethus achieving her life goal of living in the South of France. Im so grateful that Im there, she says. I have my boulangerie, I drive my little car around with my dog. I love the energy, and I love that part of the world.

Perhaps its the caffeineor the jet lagbut Anderson is a font of energy, speaking fast (and fluently) on a wide variety of subjects. Over the course of an hour, we discussed everything from her unique bond with Assange and her thoughts on WikiLeaks election activities to the chaotic Trump administration.

How did ride-hailing app safety become an issue of great concern for you?

Its so commonly used and Ive never really felt comfortable with it myself. I also have two young boys and see young girls using it all the time by themselves. I realized that these drivers arent vetted, so theres danger involved, and theres this false sense of security because its an app, so felt it was something I could bring awareness to. Then to find out that the drivers are also exploited by the company, as its a part of this gig economy where theyre not supplying them with health care or any kind of rights as an employee, it all started feeling really seedy. And its a big business and the people are really successful who run these companies, and they need to do it right. Now riders have these panic apps and things, which shows you that its probably not a good idea to get an Uber if you need a panic app!

They do make it incredibly difficult to report any serious problems.

Its your word against theirs, and youre really getting into a locked vehicle with a complete stranger. Im suggesting that drivers go through the same kind of screenings as taxi drivers do, and also that the drivers are treated as employees and not third-party providers, so they take responsibility for their employees and give them the benefits that they deserve so you get a more qualified driver. Its really important because its such a big part of all of our lives, and theres so many assaults happening. Were just trying to make things safer, and hopefully if we bring awareness to it, these companies will come around and put those safeguards in place.

youtube

A recent Ride Responsibly PSA you released drew a line between the dangers of ride-hailing apps and the #MeToo movement. What was the thought process behind that ad?

It was happening at the time when we were putting the commercial together, and we thought it was really, really important to draw attention to this movement, and how this is part of it. Its also about taking the initiative of preventing these things from happening to yourself, and Ive been saying this a lot in different places and it hasnt been received that well because people perceive that Im victim-blamingand Im not. Im just a girl who had a great mom who taught me to protect myself in a given situation, and I think thats what we need to do. We need to not have this false sense of security that these things are safeand also when it comes to going to a hotel. So we have to take preventative measures, and its not victim-blaming, because obviously the perpetrator is always at fault, but we have to be more vigilant about protecting ourselves.

One of the things thats being corrected by the #MeToo movement is the insidious casting-couch culture in Hollywood, which has been around since its inception. Its disgusting that it had been reduced to a clich, the casting couch. I know youve spoken about a creepy incident with Steven Seagal while auditioning for Under Siege.

Right. It had been accepted as part of the culture. Ive had a lot of creepy moments, but I got out of there fast [with Seagal]. No job is worth disrespecting yourself. Ive been offered many campaigns and private auditions and they didnt make sense to me. I thought, this doesnt mean that much to me, and this is not how Im going to do it. Im not that ambitious.

Are there any incidentsbesides the one with Seagalthat stick out for you in Hollywood, where your alarm bells were really going off and you thought, I gotta get out of here?

So many. And the thing is, people like to think that the Playboy Mansion was a sleazy place, but it was so elegant and chic and people were very respectful to each otherprobably because going there they knew that it was this freer kind of environment. The women were beautiful and fun, there were artists, and it was this crazy, fun, wild time, but it was very respectful. It wasnt creepy. Lots of things happened at the Playboy Mansion but it was all consensual.

Youve been an activist for quite some time now, and I believe it began with PETA and fighting for animal rights.

My beginning as an activist was to defend animals. Since I was little I was always protecting animals in my neighborhoodI was always protected the three-legged dog, or a bird with a broken wing, and I had a cat that walked sideways. All the misfits. I just always felt an affinity with them. Then my father was hunting and I didnt really put it together what that was, and then when I was about seven, I found a dead deer hanging upside down with no head in the backyard and I realized that was meat. Even my father said he was just doing it out of habit with his friends, where theyd have a beer and go hunting and kill a deer, and hed never looked at it through the eyes of a child, and how traumatic that could be. So he stopped hunting immediately. I wasnt having that. [Laughs]

Its annoying. America can be very annoying, how everything is so anti-Russia.

Pamela Anderson

Ive lived in the woods and on the ocean, which gave me a great respect for the environment. And then with socialism and politics, and Canada versus America, and health care, everything that I learned I applied to my life and my cause, and then I met Julian [Assange] and got involved with the Courage Foundation. I recently started a new foundation called Activist Tenurean extension of my foundation which I think is the most important thing that Ive done and the most important thing that I will do. Its based on academic tenure, so we pick ten activists a year and we pay their salary. These are career activists, so if theyre being harassed by governments or the law they have money to defend themselves. We need these people to be active. Paul Watson, Julian [Assange] and Vivienne [Westwood] are on the board.

You met Julian through Vivienne, right? How did that happen?

Yes. You know, it was really funny because I write a lot of poetry and I put Julian in one of my poems. I dont even remember if I published it, but somehow he heard about it and read it, and he was talking to Vivienne and wanted to meet meand I wanted to meet him. So I finally went in [to the Ecuadorian Embassy in London] and it was a funny conversation, because he was like, Why am I in this? Why do you know me? How do you know me? And I said, well, I wanted to ask your advice: I want to know how to be more effective as an activistbecause I do believe hes one of the leaders of the free world whos very beloved and admired by young people, mostly. Information is happening so fast and is so rapidly moving that we need someone like Julian to help us understand and make sense of it all, and I dont understand why hes the enemy.

So that first meeting its you, Julian and Vivienne at the embassy?

No, it was just Julian and Ibecause I came on the wrong day or she said the wrong day. We dont know who made the mistake! So I went to the embassy, buzzed the buzzer, said who I was, and we had this long conversation. There were a lot of people in the room and then slowly it was just him and I. Then I came a few months later and started bringing him vegan food and made sure he was exercising, because I was worried about his healthhis skin was transparent. I learned a lot about him and we have a lot of mutual friends, so its nice to keep his spirits up. And he is a testimony to the human spirit. Hes been in a small room for six years and now hes being squeezedhis internets been taken away, he cant have visitors, he cant have phone calls. If Im curious about what Julians going through, I follow Julians mother, Christine, online. Shes fantastic and talks about him as a curious young boy.

With Julian, I heard that youd reached out to Kanye West to try to get in Trumps ear about possibly pardoning Julian.

Yeah. Well you know, I try to think about my friendshipsand my friends who have a lot of access to peopleand I look at them and wonder why theyre not doing more. So I reached out to [Kanye] and I also gave Kim [Kardashian] a fake fur coat, and shes sworn off fur, which is great. Ive known Kim and Kanye for a long time. I dont really see them too much, but with Kanye, I dont know, I think hes a really interesting guy. His thing is his thing and hes very unique. We need more unique figures.

Do you think that message is actually gonna get passed along to Trump?

Ah, who knows. I saw Alec Baldwin the other day at Match Game and asked him, How do you get along with Trump? and hes like, Ah, not great. I said, Well, if you get Julian a pardon maybe he could host Saturday Night Live!because Julian is really funny and not a lot of people know that.

Ive seen his dance moves and theyre pretty funny.

Youve seen Julian dance?

Theres video of him dancing in a club and he has some pretty elaborate dance moves.

Ive never seen the dance moves! But okay, hes a human being and he dances in a club.

Trumps said a lot of things about whistleblowersJulian includedand he doesnt appear to be the biggest fan of theirs. How confident are you that Trump would pardon Julian?

I dont know. You never know whats in that brain, right? You never know. But I think that public support is really important. If he sees that the public loves Julianand are wanting true informationand humanize Julian, then I think its a possibility. Anything is possible. But its not comforting to know that hes the No. 1 wanted man in America. The way people speak about him is frightening.

I think public support of Julian was higher prior to the 2016 election, when WikiLeaks appeared to target the Democratic Party.

I dont think it was targeting, it was just releasing true information that Id want to know before I vote. I know Hollywoods very angry with Julian. I get a lot of flak too for being his friend but I can usually talk people down after about ten minutes. What are you so angry at? Hes not a serial killer, hes exposing war crimes. Hes against war and so am I. Its just propaganda, you know? People are fed all this information and dont even know why theyre mad. If you really think about it, what is he doing wrong? Hes exposed powerful people doing bad things and those powerful people are spreading propaganda to destroy him and his credibility. And hes being pushed out of the embassy and then will be extradited to America, and I dont think that would be a positive experience. But maybe it will be. Maybe then it will be all over the place in the courts and everything will be revealed.

The thing about WikiLeaks and the election though is that all the leaks only affected one candidateHillary Clinton. It was strange to many that, given his myriad scandals and payoffs and what have you, there were no WikiLeaks leaks involving Trump.

If there was material supplied to WikiLeaks [about Trump] they would have put it out for sure.

But there was also communication between members of the Trump campaign and WikiLeaks. Donald Trump Jr. was DMing with WikiLeaks, Roger Stone met with Julian and pressed him for Clinton dirt. Those are just some of the things that gave people the impression that there could have been coordination between WikiLeaks and team Trump.

Has anyone even found his tax returns? I dont think those have even come out.

Two pages of an old return was leaked to The New York Times but it wasnt much.

Well obviously theres a lot more information and a lot more crazy things that have happened with the Clintons, and people had access to different things to supply to WikiLeakslike Libya and things like that. Not just tax returns or reality shows.

We talked about ride safety and sexual assault, and I know Julian is a good friend of yours but hes been accused of sexual assault by two women.

Yes, but they were made-up things and they were thrown out because it was made-up and probably an attempt to keep him kind of

Im sure you two have discussed those allegations.

Yes. It was devastating for him. Devastating for him. It was really difficult. Hes in the position hes in because of all these different crazy events that happened that hes had to manage. I went through all of the case and everythingand there was also the UN ruling that said he was arbitrarily detained and shouldnt be there. When you look through everything you see that there were so many different attempts to be available, and they just made it impossible.

Did you see Laura Poitras documentary on Julian?

That was bad. Hes really trusted a lot of people to come into his circle and theyve really let him down. With the Poitras situation, I think she got concerned with winning another Oscar instead of the truth. There were so many different things that muddied the water with her.

What were your issues with the documentary?

I dont know. Its just another poor example of representation. I dont know I think hes given up on the documentary thing.

Now, I dont know if its sexism or what but anytime you hang out with an international figure, whether its Julian Assange or Vladimir Putin, the tabloid media then connects you to them romantically.

I have such a sexy life! Im very diverse! What is my type? [Laughs] It is sexism.

But now I have to ask: are the rumors of romantic relationships with Julian Assange and Vladimir Putin true?

Its all crazy. Its funny how your relationships do get reduced to some kind of sexual relationship. I think the world of Julian, I really do, and I think hes an important person that needs to be protected, and that bringing any attention to him helps keep him safe. My role is to let people know that hes a human being and not just a robot or a computer, and that hes really sacrificing a lot for all of us. He hasnt seen sunlight in six years. His skin is transparent. He doesnt have access to doctors outside the embassy. And now Im very concerned with how hes being pushed out of the embassy. Something could happen any day now. We dont know.

One mutual friend that you and Julian share is Vladimir Putin. Your connection to Putin dates back years, right? Around 2009?

It was way before then. It was about not importing seal products into Russia, because I want to stop the seal hunting in Canadaand being Canadian, that is such a stain on Canada. I worked closely with Brigitte Bardot and Russias IFAW [International Fund for Animal Welfare], so this is why Ive spoken at the Kremlin a few times with the minister of the environment, and theyve made such great changes when it comes to protecting endangered species. Its a different way of doing business there, obviously, and I dont agree with everything, but the things that Ive been involved in there, things move very fast and its good to see that theyre so forward-thinking when it comes to the environment.

Many Americans believe in one version of Putin, but as someone whos visited the Kremlin several times and met with him, what do you think of Putin?

Were programmed in America to think that if anythings gone wrong its Russias fault. Its just the go-to thing to do. So thats kind of a common joke there when I go to visit. They say, Well, what have we done wrong this time? And its authentic. People around the table are very, very powerful people, and they have this look of, What now? Tell us whats going on! Its authentic. And Ive also had conversations when I was there about the captivity of dolphins and the illegal captivity of whalesthat are then being sold to Chinese aquariumsand Ive seen teary eyes in the room. People just think Russians are very scary and stoic but they can be very emotional, very engaged and wanting to do the right thing. Its annoying. America can be very annoying, how everything is so anti-Russia.

You have a book out too.

The book was supposed to be called The Sensual Revolution. Its out now and you can get it on Amazon and in some bookstores. I always talk about how living a romantic life is about being engaged in the world. Compassion is sexy and activism is sexy. And it kind of transformed into this book about relationships. With so much access online, everything is so blurred, and I really believe in committed relationships and finding love. Everybodys a rock star now, so I think the cool thing is to be married or in a committed relationship. Its the nouveau sexy thing to doto not follow the herd in accumulating notches on your belt. I think were stronger in pairs, and considering the state the world is in now, we need each other. Its actually more rebellious. Its more interesting to unravel somebodyor be unraveledand really be vulnerable.

That book is co-authored by Rabbi Schmuley Boteach, and a couple of years ago you two published an op-ed that was very critical of porn.

I think we imprint ourselves with information that we put into our bodies. I spoke at Cambridge and Oxford about this, and I had women coming up to me in tearsthese were women in their twenties saying, My boyfriend hasnt touched me in four months, hes in the basement looking at porn. What is wrong with me? And theyre beautiful girls. They said, Its not like a teachers talking to us, its you, and we know youre not a prude, and if youre experiencing this and noticing this, then thank god, because were all talking about this but dont know what to do. And also they said, My boyfriend wants me to do things that Im not comfortable with but everybody else is doing it and they think this is what love looks likepornography. People are looking at porn at ten years old. And because I have two young boys, Im very sensitive to this, and I tell them, thats not what love looks like and to be respectful to women. Its tough, because what are we turning into? Im not a prudeIm a very open person sexuallybut I think that its damaging.

Also, I have a friend whose daughter was just married for two months and she was walking to her job and was attacked in an alley. She was raped in every part of her body, her jaw was broken and her teeth were knocked out, and then she was left in a garbage can with a lid put on. She was in a coma for many weeks but thankfully came out of it and is still alive. It ended up being a 20-year-old boy who lived in his parents house and watched porn and played video games all day. So I think that violent porn is becoming more attractive too because people need more, and weirder, and crazier, and its creating monsters.

So youre arguing that porn has gotten too extreme.

Well, everyone has to know what their version of porn is, too. Some people think Playboy is porn, and look, I think sexy things are fun.

I dont think Playboy is porn at all.

We have to decide what porn is for ourselves, what is damaging, and what is replacing our relationships. If were not touching our wives and our girlfriends or boyfriends and are in the bathroom with our computer screens, I think thats an addiction. Its just too bad.

Are your views on porn and sexuality shaped at all by what happened to you in the 90s? Because you had a pair of sex tapes leak online of you. And it was almost at the dawn of the internet and file-sharing.

Trust me, yesthe worst. I think I was in the Guinness Book of World Records for most downloaded before the tape came out. It was devastating, and it was devastating to our marriage too, and really hard to get over. It was difficult on my family, on my kids, and everything. It was hard. Because Tommy [Lee] and I just filmed everythingWoo, were naked! Yay!and someone spliced it together, called it something and put it out there. It was pretty embarrassing.

It ended up establishing this blueprint to fame that several women followed after, including Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian.

It was almost like a way to become famous. And theyre so sweet and I know they looked up to me, but they should never have done that. Why do that? [Laughs] But they I dont know. I guess I kind of started a trend, unfortunately.

I read the Hollywood Reporter interview you did, and it said that you attended one of Trumps birthday parties in the 90s. Did he ever try with you?

I was paid like $500 to go, I think. But no, never. I dont know which wife he was with, but he was with a wife. A blonde with a heavy accent. Arent they all blondes with heavy accents? Oh no, Melania is a brunette. I dont know who he was with. And I dont think he was lecherous. I think he was very kind and, thinking back, he was always very curious about how people were managing their lives, career and celebrity. I dont know when it was, but I must have been doing something involved with activism and I remember he came up to me and said, Good for you!

But how do you feel about him as president? I mean, two of your big concern areas are animals and the environment, and this guy doesnt give a damn about either. His two sons are big-game hunters who enjoy taking trips to Africa and murdering endangered species.

Yes, its terrible. I always have my go-to line about how big guns means small something elsebut Im not gonna say it. Its compensation for something. Try other things. Its terrible. And the environmental issues... But also, hes been institutionalized. Hes out there in the world and hes unpredictable but theres a whole force around him too. The government is just strange right now.

You were on team Bernie Sanders during the election but ended up voting for Jill Stein.

Yeah.

But Jill bilked Americans out of $7 million.

Yes, theres that too. I dont know. The choices were difficult but I dont believe in just vote what you feel. Bernie I think wouldve done better [than Trump].

Were about 500 days in. If you could go back and do it again, do you vote for Hillary? And do you think Hillary would have done a better job as president?

I dont know. I have no idea. One thing Trump has doneand Im not a supporter of Trumpis hes kind of stirred things up, and everyone realizes there needs to be a new way. Because there was no right choice and people were fed up with the way our government was running. Hopefully there are people out there coming out with new ways.

One of the things about Trump is he has tremendous anxietythe 6 a.m. tweets and all that. When youre a leader with a lot of anxiety, youre going to pass that on to the people.

Its terrible. But, sitting with Assange right around the time of the election, he had no idea. He did not think Trump was going to win. He was shocked like everybody else. He didnt think that they would allow it to happen.

You said that you reached out to Kanye but we did have Kim Kardashian recently visit the White House and successfully secure a pardon for Alice Marie Johnson. Are you trying to land a meeting with Trump to discuss a pardon for Julian?

Id love to have a meeting with Trump. I would like to have a meeting at the White House but it just hasnt happened. I sent a fake fur coat to Melania too, and she hasnt worn fur since she got the coat. I said, please follow in the footsteps of other first ladies who didnt wear fur. I would love to meet with Trump about Julian but there are so many more qualified people who I guess theyd want to listen to. Ive spent a lot of time with him but the issues and concerns are very complicated. Julian is relentless with his fight and relentless with his vision and has incredibly smart people around him, so even if hes taken out of the equationhopefully not literallythe movement will still continue. People are fed up with how secretive governments are and there are a lot of skeletons in the closet of the American government. Those skeletons need to be brought to light so we can stop it.

Original Article : HERE ; This post was curated & posted using : RealSpecific

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shutupandquityourcrying · 6 years

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UGH DUUUUUDE, ITS LIKE I OBVIOUSLY NEED TO READ MORE BC I WAS WRITING LAST WEEK AND TWO WEEKS AGO ABOUT MY PERSONAL PROBLEMS WITH HOW I AM JUDGED AND PUT DOWN FOR NOT FITTING INTO THE SPACE THATS MADE FOR ME IN SOCIETY BECAUSE I DO NOT IN MY HEAD OR HEART FIND ANY VALUE IN OWNING ANYTHING AND ABOUT HOW I EITHER HAVE TO REPROGRAM MYSELF LIKE THE WAYS I THINK AND FEEL AND MY TRUE DESIRES AND OUTLOOK AND EVERY THING ABOUT ME IN ORDER FOR ME TO PLACE ENOUGH VALUE ON OWNING THINGS BECAUSE THATS HOW MY VALUE, WORTH, RESPECTABILITY, SUCCESS, ETC IS JUDGED BY OTHERS ; LIKE I WAS WRITING ABOUT HOW IF I STAY MYSELF I WILL ALWAYS BE A “LOSER” IN THE EYES OF OTHERS BECAUSE AS A CULTURE, COMMUNITY, SOCIETY WE MEASURE SUCCESS BY WHAT WE OWN AND WHAT WE ARE ABLE TO OWN. LIKE ADULTHOOD MILE STONES ARE LITERALLY ALL MARKED BY WHAT WE COME TO OWN. LIKE A CAR, A HOUSE, ENOUGH TO GET OUT OF OUR DEBT, ENOUGH TO AFFORD A VACATION AND TRAVEL, ENOUGH TO PAY FOR OUR OWN BILLS AND LIKE GETTING MARRIED AND HAVING KIDS WHICH IS ALSO JUST LIKE OWNING. I WROTE ABOUT HOW THE “IDEAL FUTURE” I HAVE IMAGINED SINCE I WAS 13 IS THIS STILL FRAME THAT I THINK IS ALL METAPHORICAL. THAT MY IDEAL FUTURE IMAGE EMBODIES A “FEELING” THAT I AM ALONE IN AN EMPTY APARTMENT WITH NO FURNISHINGS BESIDES A BED AND A DESK WITH MY OWN WRITTEN ON PAPERS TACKED TO THE WALL AROUND THE DESK WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY A WORKSPACE AND THAT THERES A SLIDING GLASS DOOR TO A BALCONY AND I CAN SEE A BUSY BUSTLING CITY AT NIGHT TIME. I WROTE ABOUT WHAT ALL OF THOSE THINGS REPRESENT EMOTIONALLY. ITS A LOT OF STUFF IF ANYONE GIVES A FUCK. ANYWAYS OVERALL IT REPRESENTS ME HAVING ALREADY “MADE IT” AND THAT I WOULD BE RESPECTED FOR MY CREATIVE WORK AND THAT BECAUSE I ALREADY EARNED MY RESPECT I WAS “FREE” TO NOW “CREATE” WHAT I WANT WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT “WHAT AMOUNT OF RESPECT THIS CREATION WILL EARN ME”. BECAUSE EVEN IN MY DREAMS ABOUT A FUTURE, AND WHEN ASKED “FAME OR FORTUNE” I PICK FAME NOT CAUSE I WANT FAME BUT BECAUSE BEING RESPECTED BY MY COMMUNITY AND/OR THE GA IS ACTUALLY WORTH SOMETHING TO ME. MONEY JUST DOESNT HOLD THE SAME VALUE IN MY FUCKING NATURE. IT JUST DOESNT. NOT ONLY BC I DONT HAVE ANY DO I SAY THIS, ITS JUST NEVER AMOUNTED TO THAT. EVEN HOW I WORK AND GET PAID, I FORGET THAT I GET PAID AT THE END OF THE WEEK FOR WHATEVER HOURS I WORK. I WORK MORE OR LESS HOURS AND ITS MORE ABOUT RESPECT AND RESPONSIBILITY THAN IT IS ABOUT ANYTHING. LITERALLY ALL MY YEARS IN THE WORKFORCE AND THE CONCEPT OF “IF I WORK THIS HOUR, THAT HOUR EQUALS = $$$” NEVER SUNK IN, AND I TRY TO MAKE IT SINK IN BECAUSE I REALIZED THAT ABOUT MYSELF BUT IT JUST DOESNT SINK IN. ANYWAYS YEAH AND I WROTE ABOUT HOW THE CITY I COULD SEE THROUGH THE GLASS AND THAT IN THAT STILL FRAME IMAGE THE FEELING IS THAT I AM GETTING READY TO GO SOMEWHERE AND HOW I DONT KNOW WHERE I AM GOING BUT JUST THAT I FEEL LIKE FREE TO GO THAT THAT REPRESENTS MY DESIRE TO FEEL FREE TO LIVE LIFE ETC ETC ETC IT WAS VERY IN DETAIL AND I WROTE A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF RELATED TO THIS SHIT, SERIOUSLY IT WAS LIKE 90 PAGE RANTINGS AND I AM NOT GONNA EVEN TOUCH ON THE MORE INTERESTING PARTS OR GO INTO IT WITH WHAT IVE ALREADY SAID BUT MY POINT IS I WAS JUST WRITING ALL THIS STUFF THAT ALIGNS WITH KARL MARX’S ISSUES WITH CAPATALISM AND HOW IT LIKE HAS EVERYONE TRICKED INTO “HAVING THEIR OWN REASONS” OR A “PURPOSE” FOR THEIR OWN PERSONAL WAY THEYRE GONNA LIVE IN LINE WITH CAPITALISM. LIKE HOW MUCH IT AFFECTS US BEYOND JUST LIKE THE DIRECT OBVIOUS EFFECTS. I AM JUST VERY EXCITED TO HAVE LISTENED TO THIS, AND NOW I WILL READ MORE, I KNEW THAT HE EXISTED AND LIKE THAT HE WAS ON MY TEAM IN A WAY BUUUUT BECAUSE I HAVENT REALLY READ FOR STUDY VERY MUCH UNTIL THE PAST FEW MONTHS I HAVENT BEEN AWARE OF HOW CLOSELY SOME GREAT THINKERS ALLIGN WITH THE WAY I HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THINGS AND EVERYTIME I REALIZE THERES A GREAT THINKER THINKING ABOUT THINGS IN A VERY BASIC WAY LIKE ME, THAT MEANS THERES SO MUCH OTHER STUFF THEYVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT I CAN GO READ AND LEARN AND MENTALLY/EMOTIONALLY GET OFF TO SO IM EXCITED

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samanthasroberts · 7 years

Text

The Great Dying: Happiness Comes on Day Five

My family has come to Hawaii.

Hawaii, like an aging model, is still gorgeousjust sometimes in a fragile, wasted way.

My parents were here a long time ago; they came on their honeymoon, back in the Old World times. They bought a hotel-and-airfare package to Honolulu. They went scuba diving in the coral reefs and touched real rays and even one dolphin, they said.

Of course thats not an option anymore, but you can snorkel all you like in fiberglass reefs stocked with colorful farmed parrotfish and now and then a robot shark.

I love the parrotfishs bulgy, fat lips.

Lydia Millet

About

Lydia Millet is an American novelist and conservationist. Her third novel, My Happy Life, won the 2003 PEN Center USA Award for fiction, and she has been a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize as well as a Guggenheim fellow. Her newest novel for young readers, The Bodies of the Ancients, comes out in January. The Great Dying is adapted from her YA book Pills and Starships, published by Akashic.

Back then, they ate at restaurants with views of sparkling aqua-blue bays; they went to luaus and drank fancy drinks with paper umbrellas. (We still have those; some of them have my parents names printed on them, from a honeymoon party that was held for them. robert & sara, says the faded writing, hawaii, may 2068.) They took small trips to the other islands, even the one that used to be a leper colony.

These days Honolulu and most of Oahu are seawall and salty aquifers and long, long blocks of abandoned buildings.

But they wanted Hawaii anyway. They were nostalgic. So this time we came to the Big Island, where were staying in a hotel with a view of Mauna Kea. Ive seen pictures of it from way back when, white at the top and majestic. Theres never snow anymore, even at 14,000 feet, but the volcano still looms.

Its just the four of us: my mother and my father, my little brother, and me. Its the four of us here for our last week.

A week is the period the companies usually suggest, once you finalize dates. Any longer and customers can get morbid, or even, if they decide to refuse their pharma, hysterical. And then the whole thing collapses. Any shorter and theres not enough time for good-byes.

My parents arent even that old. My mother had me in her late sixties, and two years later she had Samand though theyre vigorous and healthy on a physical level, on an emotional level theyve decided theyre done.

This would be harder without the training we did at home, without the pharma regimen they have us on. Even with those tools its still intense and vibrant, and everything seems inflected with meaning. Cursed with meaning, almost. Meaning attaches itself to everyday objectstoothbrushes, swimsuits, dangly earrings. Here in the hotel suite, I look at these normal items and everything seems like it portends something.

We just got here and already were on the brink of tears at times, or at least my mother and I are. My father and Sam are trying to act stoic, though now and then I catch one of their hands or a bottom lip trembling.

Meanwhile the edges of objects glow, blur, and fade as I look at them. They all seem permeable or aliveas though the aliveness of objects is there to compensate for my parents being ready to die.

I dont think its the pharma thats doing it, either. Sam and I arent even on a full pill regimen yet. On Day Four well have the option of a powerful tranquilizing blend: Thats Good-Bye Day. They like the contract holders to have their memories intact to say good-bye, because the fifth days pharmathe last pharmacauses forgetfulness. It brings on a long-term memory loss that wipes all memories associated with trauma, so they go out happy.

Happiness comes on Day Five.

Its early afternoon. My parents and my brother have gone out for a walk, and from the balcony of our suite I can see them strolling, their light clothes flapping in the breeze off the ocean, on a trail along the high jagged bluffs.

They carry umbrellas that protect them from the sun but also hide their faces from me. They could be anyone.

The bluffs were well engineered and have been planted to look wild, in a fake way. There are scrubby bushes from the desert, South American cacti and Chinese beach roses (according to the brochure) and even, now and then, dune grasses and sand. They hide the concrete seawall beneath the artificial bluffs so that you dont have to remember where you are or whenso you can almost forget youre not in Old Hawaii. Forget, in other words, that youre living at the tiny tail end of the fire-breathing dragon of our history.

The company my parents chose is a midsize outfit that likes to boast how it hires locals. So our rep, when it came down to it, was a lady my mother had once played golf with.

My mother isnt the golf type at all, by the way. She barely knows how to play, but one time she competed in a small-golf game for charityits mostly small golf these days, unless you have huge money to throw away on travel to one of the big courses, plus water-use finesand because she had a good sense of humor, at least till recently, she was basically the comic relief, I think.

But that one day was when she first met the rep, Jean.

Jean showed up at our apartment a couple of months ago, in the hour before dinnertime when we usually hang out together and talk about our day and stuff. The four of us were drinking cocktails in the living room. Being 15, Sam doesnt drink that much yet, but my mother had offered him a junior can of wheat beer.

And there she was at the doora compact, middle-aged woman from the 10th floor, frosted hair, braided wedge heels. Id seen her in the elevator once or twice.

This is Jean, said my mother softly. Jean, these are our children, Nat and Sam.

My name is Natalie, but I go by Nat.

The woman smiled and sat down and looked at us with a gentle but still oddly businesslike expression.

Your parents thought it might be good to have me here is how she started in.

Sam looked up right away. Hed been reading off his device.

Youre service, he said flatly.

I do work with a service company, said Jean.

She didnt miss a beat and didnt seem awkward; she had a forthright attitude without being domineering.

Youre the counselor, or whatever they call them, said Sam.

Im coordinating the personal aspect of outreach, conceded Jean.

On the contract we purchased recently, put in my mother, soft-voiced. Mine and your fathers.

Sam picked up his beer and drank most of the rest of it, a flush rising on his skin.

I had been sitting at the bay window, looking out over the garden. Our apartment complex was nice, with trees and water features and little striped chipmunks, because chipmunks always poll higher than squirrels.

Anyway, I liked to drink and take in the view.

But then, without really noticing my own movement, I turned so I was facing the room, my back against the view of the trees. In the pit of my stomach was a heavy new stone. At the same time my arms and legs felt light and liquid, like the bones in them had softened.

Why didnt you tell me? was the thing I said.

Were telling you now, sweetheart, said my mother, coming to sit beside me on the ledge. She put one arm around my shoulders. Its all according to schedule. The timing is what they recommend.

They encourage the parents not to get emotive when theyre disclosing. It only makes things worse. So my mother sat there next to me, her arm on my shoulders light, keeping a kind of professional attitude. With her free hand, she shook the cubes in her glass and raised it to drink.

My father stood facing us all with his tumbler of whiskey. His face bore a kind, bemused expression, as it used to when Sam or I would cry and he had no idea how to stop it.

You can still take it back, said Sam, with a kind of hurt urgency. Please, MomDad! Take it back!

Honey, said my mother, we dont want to. Or maybe a better way to say it is that we weve lived for you two ever since the tipping point, sweetheart. Youve been whats kept us going.

The tipping point was when we couldnt do anything more to stop the planets runaway warming. There were feedback loops in the climate system, like the albedo effect and water vapor increase in the atmosphere and plankton die-off in the oceans. So even though wed stopped emitting so much carbon and methane, we couldnt stop the seas or the temperature from rising. At least for a few centuries.

Both of you are practically grown up, said my mother. And when it comes right down to it, you dont really need usnot in the day-to-day sense. You think you do, maybe. But we know deep down that you can take care of yourselves. And you will.

You cant say what were feeling, said Sam, shaking his head. Only what you are.

It helps, for peace of mind, said Jean to Sam, if you keep argumentation for later. During this encounter, this time of disclosure, weve found that what allows for peacefulness is just listening.

Fuck listening! said Sam.

He was bright redlike someone had dealt him two slaps, one on each cheek.

And really, went on Jean calmly, as though he hadnt said anything, theres no rush here. Theres plenty of time. Remember, all contracts are voidable right up until the end. So theres absolutely nothing to make you nervous.

She didnt mention what we all knew: that theres a stiff financial penalty for last-minute cancellations. She didnt need to. My parents knew a couple whod canceled just five hours before their contract was about to start, but at that point it cost like 90 percent of the full price. And they ended up buying a new contract a couple of months later. That meant less money for the survivorsa tainted legacy.

But youre doing so well, begged Sam, turning to my mother.

I felt frozen.

Youre doing really well, youve got your moods well stabilized lately, he added.

No, yeah, son, said my father. Well were not too bad off. Were not personally complaining. We feel so lucky, compared to lots of people. No question. And you knowits not any one big thing. You know? Its not a dramatic situation, theres no particular, exact catalyst here. But we feel like, for one, heywhy not quit while were still ahead? You know, leave while weve got our health. And theres still no impairment. We all saw how Mamie got after she passed 100.

Youll be all right. You have such great resilience, added my mother. Wewe think youre very strong.

Oh please, said Sam.

Try to see it from our point of view, my father said. When we were young, there were still big animals swimming all over the oceans. The rivers and the forests had all this life in them, not just the squirrels and pigeons. You could go anywhere in the worldwe drove a gas-burning car when we were young. We flew on huge airplanes. Whenever we wanted to!

My parents keep thinking, somehow, that one day well hear about how different the world used to be and for the first time well understand them.

But isnt the world always different for the kids than it was for the parents? Sure, maybe its more different now. We get it.

But this is the only world we ever knew.

For Old World people like us, you know, said my mother, weve had as much as we can take of seeing everything go away. And we dont think we can bear towhat happens if, if it keeps going how we think it will.

Of course, we hope and pray it wont, said my father staunchly, tossing back the last of his whiskey. We figure, go early, while everythingswhile theres still hope. You know.

But I knew what he wasnt saying: They couldnt stand to see our future. They couldnt stand to watch us struggle.

Its never an easy decision, put in Jean.

Not helpful, I thought.

But then, the companies put the counselors in the room partly to deflect the family members feelings. Or fears and tears, as they say.

Your mother is so tired, Sam, said my father. He was fiddling with a pile of black and green olives on a tray. The olives were stacked in a pyramid, like in a picture Id once seen of ancient cannonballs. They should have been a tipoff that this was a special occasion, so to speak, because olives arent the kind of food we get every day. We both are, if Im perfectly honest, he added.

We sat there for a while, not knowing what to say.

Eventually Jean suggested we take a walk outside, through the courtyards of the complex. Walks are popular with service companies. Low-cost momentum, I guess, and a natural mood boost.

So we prepared ourselves fresh drinks, mostly in awkward silence, and took them with us into the elevator. We gazed outside as the car descended.

The elevators in our complex are external and made of a shaded glass, so you can see the sky and then the buildings below it, and as you drop, the trees in the courtyard come up to meet you.

Down through the green canopy, down along the tree trunks. Finally we landed facing the rock gardens, the fountains and splashing waterfalls of perfectly reclaimed sewage.

What a nice evening, said my mother, and we looked up dutifully at the fading bands of red and yellow in the western sky.

One thing we do have, in the New World, is beautiful sunsets.

I think what put my parents over the edge was a trip they took a few months ago, a light-rail weekender to the place where my father grew up. It wasnt a coastal town in the strict senseit wasnt right on the beachbut it was on a river delta, maybe 20 miles from where the true coast used to be. When the first storm surges came that couldnt be stopped by seawalls, the town got an influx of coastal refugees. Wave after wave followed, though most of the people didnt stay. Back then they were migrating to places like Ogallala, with fertile land or thick forests. If you look at an old map animation, you can see the masses moving away from the coasts, inward and upward from New York and Florida, from Southern California and the dying cities of the desertLas Vegas and Phoenix, say. The animations look like storms or vast, sky-darkening flocks of birds.

Sometimes, at home, I take a mild mood softener, sit at my screen, and gaze at the animations dreamily. You can customize them to show whatever details you wantthe continent shrinking as the oceans rise plus the massive migrations. I also like to watch the building of the seawalls. You see the swamping of Cape Cod, the swallowing up of the Florida Keys. Islands all over the oceans contract to the size of pinheads, then vanish. You can zoom way out and watch the planet rotate, see the surges of ocean that followed the melting of the ice.

Theres something lovely about it, lovely like Eno or Mozart, thoughespecially without pharmait can be sad.

Anyway, my fathers hometown had been leveled by the waves of refugee camps. Nothing was left of the houses and gardens of his leafy street, the school he walked to holding his younger brothers hand, the swing sets and climbing gyms at the park where he played. All that was gonethe whole town had turned to tent cities and landfills and fields of composting toilets.

My dads baby brother died a while back, a do-it-yourself deal. He hated the service companies. So other than us, my dad has no family left.

For a while after that weekend trip, he and my mother were so quiet that sometimes we forgot they were there.

Before we left for Hawaii, my parents helped Sam and me move to a group facility for survivors who arent old enough to live alone. The two of us will go back there after the trip, to live for a few months till I turn 18.

Then, the morning we left, Sam and I picked them up to catch the boat that brought us here. That was the worst. The apartment where we had lived was bare. Their luggage stood in a neat row against the wall, small cases packed with only bedrolls, some toiletries, and a few clothes. It was a shock to see the sterile whiteness of what used to be home.

Well, said my mother, turning back to cast a glance at the empty living room as we were filing out the front door, good-bye, everything.

Sams coming up the path again toward the hotel building, so close hes almost beneath meI see the circle of his shiny white umbrella. My parents arent with him. I squint: I can still see the two of them, out at the edge of the cliff.

The oceans turning anoxic, scientists say. Its what happened 250 million years ago in the Great Dying, otherwise known as the P-T extinction eventthe biggest mass die-off in Earths history. And now its happening again. The seawaters turned more acid from the carbon its storing, so the ocean food chain has mostly collapsed. Big burps of methane are bubbling out of the water along the continental shelves.

Where there used to be corals and whales and sea lions and seahorses, now theres mostly bacteria and archaea and viruses. The odd school of mutated jellyfish. Plus the garbage vortex and the chemical streams.

But still, Mom and Dad stand at the edge of the bluff, their arms around each others waists, and look out over the faraway waves like anything could be therelike those waves might still be the glittering roof of a marvelous underwater country.

The Fiction Issue

Tales From an Uncertain Future

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/

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crazykendal · 7 years

Text

Im Not Allowed To Use My Computer But Here I am

Get ready for a ton of grammar errors im sorry

1.) What’s better, having high expectations or having low expectations?

low expectations, if you don't ever want to be hurt

2.) Would you rather go without junk food for a year or go without TV for a year?

i’d go without tv for a year since I never watch tv besides netflix

3.) Describe your perfect man/woman.

not in the mood

4.) Thoughts on school dress codes?

eh doesnt bother me

5.)Any strange phobias?

deep water (still), seeing people during summer because im a mess, abandonment 6.) At what job do you see Donald Trump best fit?

president?? oh but people are gonna hate me if I say that haha fucking hate me more 7.) Who was your first crush?

this one boy I dont think I ever even talked to before, honestly what the actual fuck 8.) Who was your first best friend?

she knows who she is. I dont consider her a best friend but she is my closest friend ever. No its not my cat. Ive known her for 10 years 9.)What is one weird thing about you?

I hate myself but that isnt weird, idk 10.) Top 5 TV shows you like to watch? The walking dead and The 100.. thats just it haha

11.) What are your favorite boys names? oh like friends or actual names. Im going to do just names because im going to stop exposing myself and stop being so honest. actually I have no favorite boy names haha

12.) What are your favorite girls names? Brooklyn haha I haven't finished that stupid wattpad story yet

13.) Do you have any tattoos? If so, what are they? no

14.) Do you plan on getting (more) tattoos? If so, what do you want to get as of the moment? i would want to get tattoos if they didnt hurt when applied.

15.) Do you have any piercings? Do you plan on getting more? no

16.) Do you like hugging people? depends on who. but now, no

17.) Think of ANY person on earth right now. Who did you think of? a friend who im going to see on wednesday

18.) Do you have an iPhone? yeah I dont use it anymore

19.) What is the worst thing that could happen in your life right now? hmm maybe if some guy didnt go to my school next year but that isn't happening

20.) Do you watch anime? no ive watched like 2 animes years ago.

21.) What brings true happiness? getting a grip and letting everything go. Im free of a lot of pain ive been going through for a few months and its the first time ive been truly happy with myself even though I want to fucking- nevermind hahahaha

22.) What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever paid for? I feel like I should know this, but i have no idea

23.) If you could have any job in the world and get paid millions of dollars a year for it, what would you be and why? idk

24.) Do you want children? If so, how many? no

25.) Name and describe someone who you feel most comfortable around. honestly no one, including myself, my trust isnt something everyone has anymore

26.)If you could invent a holiday, what would it be? lexadeservedbetter

27.)Would you rather have summer weather or winter weather all year round? winter weather, gotta be cold like my heart

28.) If you could make an alien race, describe what they would look like. they’d look like all the people I hate so I can murder them

29.) What was the first thing you learned to cook? i cant cook, I kinda can but it ends up with my mom yelling at me

30.) Describe your sense of humor. Im a joke. people laugh at me because of how fucking stupid I am. I get used to it.

31.) What is the key to happiness? don't worry about anyone else until you've worked yourself out.

32.) How many phone numbers do you have committed to memory? Whose numbers are they? my mom’s and emergency services :)

33.) Name three songs that make you want to dance. Come Over- Clean Bandit, Wasted Youth- Fletcher, and Caught Up- Sarah Close

34.) What job did you want to have as a child? i wanted to be a mom, dont ask me how I thought that was a fucking job besides what the fuck was I even thinking a mom? what. the. fuckkkkk

35.) Do you have any talents or skills? I can get really angry :)

36.) What was the worst punishment you’ve ever had? I was grounded for like 2 months you can ask me how if you want btw

37.) Did you ever do anything weird as a child? yes there were many things

38.) What is your dream car? ooohh I never thought about that probably a pegassi zentorno (doesn't exist in real life look it up)

39.) Describe something that made you laugh this week. Ive over come stuff that I can finnally look back and realize how stupid I was.

40.) Did you have a dream last night? If so, describe it. i dreamt a lot last week and its so irrelevant to me nowwww

41.) Do you ever have repetitive dreams? Describe it/them. repetitive like always that one person in them, yeah

42.) Describe the worst/ scariest dream you’ve ever had. I had a really nice dream and I woke up and I was sad hahaha story of my life

43.) Describe the best dream you’ve ever had. ^^

44.) If God himself gave you a choice of either having unlimited money for the rest of your life or finding your one true love starting tomorrow, which one would you choose (keep in mind, you are still able to make a ton of money if you choose love, and you are still able to meet your soul mate if you choose money)? trick question god doesn't exist :) but probably unlimited money because love is fucking useless and retarded

45.) If you could do anything (and I mean ANYTHING) right now without consequences, what would you do and why? run away and see a friend I haven't seen all summer

46.) Do you have any recipes that you know off the top of your head? What is it/ what are they? no

47.) Do you have your license? If so, do you have a car? no

48.) Have you ever had a near death experience? yes im not going to describe it

49.) Do you personally know anyone that has been to prison? yep

50.) Have you ever been in a physical fight?

yep

51.) When you get out of the shower, do you towel dry, blow dry, or air dry your hair? air dry unless I have to go somewhere i will usually blow dry.

52.) When you go to the movies, what snacks and drinks do you take with you? just a ton of candy hahahaha

53.) Do you like going to the beach? If so, do you like to stay dry or go in the water? If not, why? no

54.) Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

55.) If you could have a superpower ASIDE from being invisible or being able to fly, what would you have? oh my fucking god that's what I was going to write. how bout shape shifting or something

56.) If you were able to live for however long you wanted to (i’m talking thousands of years without aging), when would you choose to die? when I got bored, I cant say lonely because I already am

57.) What do you think happens after you die? youre body stops working and people put you in a hole in the ground

58.) Do you believe in aliens? sure

59.) Do you believe in ghosts? 50/50

60.) Do you believe in spiritual things like ouija boards, tarot cards, and crystals? Do you believe they are portals for evil entities to enter the mortal world? haha no but ouija boards are fun to trick people with haha *Meghan*

61.) If you could make one mythical being real, who/what would you make?

my will to live

62.) Do you get tan, or do you burn? burn

63.) Describe your shower routine. too long

64.) Do you enjoy school? Why or why not? no because the people there suck and its much to stressful

65.) In your opinion, what is the worst way to die? probably falling.

666.) Do you get carsick, sea sick, or airplane sickness? none, ive never been on an airplane so idk

67.) What’s one memory that you wish you could live again and again? ..

68.) What were some of your stuffed animal’s names from when you were a kid? hattie my stuffed chicken haha

69.)Do you have any pets? 69 cats :)

70.) Describe your daily wardrobe. dark

71.) Describe what your daily wardrobe would be if you were rich. probably the same

72.) Create a character right now. Give them a name, age, and character description. are you fucking with me im writing out a new character for some private stuff as I work on this survey.

73.)What was the last thing you bought? a couple books

74.) Have you ever bought a CD? What band was it for? the last cd I bought was hfk :)

75.) Describe your perfect ice cream sundae. cookie dough and im gooood

76.) If you could make ANYTHING happen right now with no cost, trouble, or obstacles, what would you do? cant say but anything could happen by ellie goulding is annoying and I love it

77.) What are some of your favorite physical activities to do? running but I havent run in a long time and im out of shape

78.) What were some of your favorite shows as a child? dont remember

79.) Describe how you would survive the zombie apocalypse. id make a group and Id lead it, id also make sure chandler riggs and alycia debnam-carey would be there because I love them and theyve both been in zombie shows. yesssss

80.)What are some things you shouldn’t say at work? when does the boss retire

81.) If you were told that if you killed someone, you would save 100 people, would you do it? if one the 100 people were clarke griffin, yes.

82.) How’s the weather right now? its dark

83.) What is the background on your cell phone right now? its lexa with a ton of thug life stuff added onto her haha

84.)Is it better to work at a job that you love or a job that pays well? job that pays well

85.) What do you have within arms reach of your bed? my alarm clock

86.) Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, why? no

87.) Have you ever won a trophy, prize, or medal? If so, for what? two stupid school medals and thats it

88.) Do you have any posters, pictures, or art hanging on your walls in your room? If so, what are they? video game map posters, shitty drawing i havent taken down and comic and movie posters

89.) Are you afraid of the dark? If so, why? I used to be haha I think I still am.

90.)What is something that you’ve never done but would like to try? been a good friend to anyone

91.) If you could choose three famous people or characters to be friends with, who would you choose and why? just friends? thats hard. probably Stevie Boebi, Alexis G. Zall and Ally Hills. I would say Shannon Beveridge but I have like this huge crush on her alright

92.) Do you smile at strangers when you pass by them on the street? no because I hate people

93.) Do you have a favorite TV commercial? If so, what is it? life alert

94.) Do you like your handwriting? no it looks like a little kids handwriting

95.) Cable TV or Netflix? netflix

96.) What are your favorite smells? everything at bath and bodyworks please

97.) Do you consider yourself physically strong? I wish dood

98.) Describe a time where you said something really rude or mean, whether intentional or not.

I told some people thing that weren't true about them just because I was really mad. #dickhead

99.) Do you ask strangers to pet their dogs? no

100.)What is your most embarrassing moment?

my lifespan

101.) Has anyone really close to you ever died? If so, who was it and how did you handle it?

my cat maverick, my grandma and lexa

102.) Describe your plan of action if you were home alone and you heard someone break into your house.

I gotta knife drawer and i’d love to use it

103.) If you were to be born again, would you want to be born male or female?

male, im not saying i want to be a guy but id like to experience things differently

104.) What shampoo do you use?

idk

105.) Guess the meaning of this word: ulotrichous.

something horrible, or myself

106.) Do you let messages (phone, email, text, social media, etc…) build up, or do you have to look at them right away?

no one ever texts me im always the one to start a convo and that sucks

107.) Where is the nearest McDonalds to your house?

probably like 5 miles away

108.) If you had $1 billion and you had to spend it in exactly one week, what would you spend it on?

id buy a house and a ton of cars even tho I cant drive yet

109.) What is the best thing you’ve ever eaten?

pizza

110.) If you could go on a trip around the world with up to three people, who would you bring (they can be people you know personally or famous people).

ellie goulding, chandler riggs and alycia debnam-carey

111.) What expletive/ explicit phrase do you say most often?

frick frack fuck

112.) What is your personal definition of success?

finishing something the correct way

113.) How was your day today?

ive been doing yardwork and I volenteered at fieldhaven

114.) What is the closest Big City you live by?

sacramento

115.) Have you ever been in a car accident?

yes but they were never serious

116.) Do you hide anything from your parents?

all the time like hmm idk my sexuality

117.) If you could possess one talent, what would you be able to do?

make myself invisible :)

118.) Ugly and smart or beautiful and stupid?

depends on the person

119.) What is the worst thing you’ve ever seen in real life?

myself

120.) Use only 3 words to describe how you want your future to go.

i hate myself

121.) QUICK! give me a few things a brick could be useful for

you can throw them at people

122.) If you could make a dream society, describe it in great detail where it would be, who would be in it, and what rules there would be?

the lost youth is a band of teens who pull children off the streets and always get into fights with the other gang, the redemption. there will be blood.

123.) If you could make any animal miniature, what would you make and why?

cats

124.) What are your favorite candle scents?

I dont really have and candles so idk

125.) If you HAD to have one plastic surgery, what would you get and why?

my nose

126.) Do you prefer to hang out with the same sex or the opposite sex?

depends on who but right now no one

127.) If you could make a charity, what would the profits go towards? How would you raise money for it?

myself because I am poor

128.) Describe the body you wish you had.

I wish I was taller

129.) If you were a famous director, what would your next movie be about? Describe the plot, characters, and possible title.

the lost youth

130.) If only women were to rule the world, how different would the world be by 2050?

im not being sexist but it wouldn't be all that great but maybe politics could get better I have no idea

131.) What is your favorite alcoholic drink?

chocolate milk :) yes

132.) Do you have a problematic friend?

im the problematic friend

133.) Are you more spontaneous or more of a planner?

depends on the situation

134.) If you could change your full name, what would your name be?

not saying

135.) What is one song that describes your life?

hard times- paramore

136.) What is one show you’ve been meaning to watch but can never find the time for?

the rest of the 100 why the fuck are so many people dying I needed a break after lexa died and now all the nightbloods and lincoln are dead. duh fuck

137.) Do you find it easy to drop toxic people from your life that you’ve known for a long time?

Id have to ask people because people talk behind my back telling them im toxic. if you were me its understandable and im totally alright with it now

138.) Do you like children? Why or why not?

no children fucking suck

139.) What is your zodiac sign?

Pisces rising, Sagittarius sun, and and Capricorn moon

140.) Do you like to dance? Do you dance often? In front of other people?

yes but i cant haha

141.) Name some of your favorite colors.

blue and black and sometimes orange and purple

142.) Have you ever shoplifted? If so, what was it?

143.) If you could speak three additional languages, what would they be?

danish, french, and japanese

144.) Have you ever been in legal trouble?

145.) Have you ever had surgery?

146.) If you could change 2 things about yourself, what would you change and why?

my sexuality and my face haha

147.) What do you want done with your body after you die?

i dont care

148.) What three physical features do people compliment you most on? What do they say about them?

usually my hair because im ugly

149.) If you could have your own business, what would you do?

own a large company, I dont know

150.) What current friend do you have that you’ve known the longest?

im going on vacation with her for a week in Oregon that’ll be funnn

ok so I could totally tag you olivia but I just made you do that other really long one so if you're reading this you can if you want haha

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