would have too much to say that inevitably repeatedly breaking things up into tweets wouldn't be a pain but already going back like, lets check out andor episode one again in full true connoisseur mode and i'm not pressed if i make it into a proper in order rewatch, also when the bonus for me is that i'm always more likely to better keep track of names or faces or pick up on something that was supposed to be like a straightforward plot moment or whatever else, right, though i didn't have any especial problem with that. anyways i'm just already like oh this entire first sequence fucks, and i didn't really go into this that skeptically but do remember like yeah first time around it was like with this intro premise alone like ah i see this fucks then

like first of all an initial shot choice that is stylish, which tells us that there will be stylishness. fun that the couple evil [police procedural] characters are great at being pathetic zero charisma soaking creepy & wet disgusting in their own special ways, but cassian is getting rained on all the time he's cutting the plumbing line he swam here soaking wet literal treatment

things feeling figuratively and literally grounded (walking, only seeing that walkway, streetview, no soaring establishing shot to show This Isn't Your Ordinary City (scifi edition)) like, also still clear enough it's scifi but really with the Magical Realism type of approach, which i do imagine i enjoy more

the scoring is so good. BANGER of a track used when walking into the bar, also used later when dropped into the introduction of his beach getaway new life scene, brief as it is. the sexy edm style track, and it Is also like "well i mean. sure then" getting so far into this scene before it's evident like oh you're not actually here to have sex. pretty flirtatious w/this proprieter but it's like, maybe discreetly acting natural, maybe just acting naturally for real and it's just like that, we've all been there re Blend In, Follow Their Lead as a rule for operating anywhere ever, presumably relevant here, the Everyone's Wary nature of the whole series....tbt talking about jyn like yeah idk maybe her brand of wariness that's not charismaticly intense enough nor closed offedly intense enough is like, itself confusing or whatever but absolute "what's not to get or like" sense from me, and naturally cassian cropping up like it's your wary kindred spirit

anyways then having fun in there. looking at the required sexy hologram dancer like hmm they're a little space androgynous. a little space gnc af. the guys who are just immediately pissed off b/c the supposed new customer is getting preference. the delay after the proprieter lady is like Behave to them and cassian looks at her, then them. his immediate brooking no nonsense w/the two as soon as they're all hostile mode at him about all of it, at least in terms of like, not playing it utterly neutral. the It's Political times of him asking about a woman from kenari, proprieter lady going for both a) how about this other planet of origin and [names an inferred similar feature] as well as this kind of establishes already that [from kenari] can be space racially profiled, since cassian doesn't have to explicitly confirm that's where he's from too, and her inferring this is a Preference that can be catered to around physical features, and certainly once cassian's Wanted about this, the urgency around maarva & co asking who they've ever told that cassian's from kenari is sure like ah, space borders, space immigration, space [indeed the racial profiling when the soaking is he creepy or wet pathetic heinous cop pulls up an Image], the repeated like space colonialism and space indigeneity and space resource extraction that gets to come up more with [i've been in this fight since i was six years old] flashbacks....it's great like, the magical realism aspect where it's like [yeah Real Life but slight au] feeling immediately relevantly recognizable and as viscerally dramatic as you'd want, like, everyone's daily lives involving this inherent lack of safety that can turn into the stress of imminent danger on a dime. also the eventual b) asking if he's a Boyfriend or Husband like, space gender, magical realism style where it's like of course the space misogyny power disparity they'd be on the lookout for, might be vulnerable to a partner who is a space man. oh and then also the shift when he says it's his sister he's looking for, from more guarded to sympathetic when it's like, the context then isn't the woman's vulnerability being heightened if this is someone here out of like, a possessive angle, and rather that he's now not only presumably sympathetic to her as well, but potentially some of that vulnerability being extrapolated to him as well. which is not inaccurate

obsessed w/the Long Shot where cassian's getting held up by the two company sentry guys and it's him close up center frame slightly from above and just tearing it up acting while we only hear the other two for a good while until they wander in out of focus, that at first we also can't see and thus can't immediately Know they're talking to him....as well as again establishing like, yeah this is a prequel where we know our protagonist won't die no matter how [people are definitely dying] the situations are, yeah we know he's cool action guy even, but he's not operating in a story here where it's all about his protracted solo epic action sequences, he wants to avoid those, other people want to avoid those, everyone's better off operating more stealth mode if they can help it, but also that it doesn't matter to him that We know he's not gonna die, he doesn't know it, and Everyone knowing those stakes and reacting to the stress rather than being like stoic too epic to be at all fazed badasses. d luna crushing it, everyone's great but yeah sure acting as hell huh

also this time around i was just so much more noticeably affected by like oh i feel bad for this guy who's realizing his buddy who also sucks is dead and now that he's in over his head majorly life and death....everyone acting in every part is just going ham like bevy of these varied performances in varied roles and nobody dropping the ball in the least. while it's obvious too that like, feels bad for the panicky source in rogue one intro as well but cassian can't give much away then b/c he's not the protagonist and it's all very mysterious at this point. and that in addition to upping the surprise, it's presumably nonzero meant to be a kindness from him to take the time to comfort the guy before then blowing him away. whereas here the guy sees it coming and like, really brought this upon yourselves and you made this potentially life or death for cassian from the start, as he was aware, but this time it's like yeah cassian wasn't expecting that to turn into [bad luck, that headbutt killed you. and/or also the fall] and is Not so mysterious to us so can be clearly surprised and less than thrilled about things as well....but feels apropos that also w/ this intro of these two rando sentry guys from the bar who the proprietor was like yeah they're not really cops but they annoyingly like to act like it, it can be a bit more genuinely pathetic vs the Pathetic(tm) quality of the like imperial space feds characters. like oh i do feel bad for this guy and all the time he has here to plead for his life :( but doesn't feel like it's meant to be some [dun dunnn?] moment re cassian b/c it's like, tells us the stakes, tells us he's not fucking around and Will shoot someone but we've also been told he's not like here to be, or feel, badass invincible, is not unaffected by fear of death nor of having killed someone / death in general, but also Will be blowing you away if need be, also speaking to like, he's run calculations before abt like, whaddaya gonna do, what are the risks and which are you willing to take, and obviously has fought before and if he's ever killed someone before it wouldn't be surprising, some like "my god i've never done that before / now i'm out for blood, never look back" factor does not seem to be relevant. but fr was fun to be surprised by like oh i feel bad for this guy this time around lol noticeably much more than affected me the first time around. true [oops in over your head] vibes but which also then speak to like, yeah probably would've stopped pretending to be cops, just feels like yeah he's more distant from [uh oh, attention from Empire cops now] figures so it's like, ah, you bring it upon yourself but. i'm not quite sure what got me this time around lol, again i guess just more ability to focus on details and thee moment b/c i'm not like, needing to intently devote my attention to potentially following names and faces and plotlines b/c it's the opening scene here and don't get lost before things even happen. maybe it's having subtitles on where i'm all the more sure of the dialogue and him talking about "we'll go in together" has me like "there but for your fucking around, no need for this, i remember the vaguely friendly acknowledgment before your egos were bruised and you got hostile about it and escalated it to This" maybe it's even him offering a story and phrasing it like "we played too hard in hitting" when i have this like, vulnerable association lol like if anyone's upset / distressed enough And there's the immediate proximity / presence of something meant to be like, purely fun, where even talking about Playing may be enough to be like oh no lol, even when that's not really what happened. again, the acting from everyone, maybe it's just focusing all the more on that, wherein truly epic seeming distressed and miserable, maybe it also helps that we also get shots of more diego luna acting which is also to the effect of: pretty distressed and miserable, soaking wet. i dunno but i'm like hell yeah being all the more caught up in whatever.

also that this was like, oh a seeming potential thread establishment? and of course "whoops killed two guys" is indeed an established thread, the [looking for his sister] remaining latent as the setup to that inciting event and otherwise like, just something he does, characterization and [backstory thread] relevant, but only that. and yet, the way that opening scenes are generally meant to do, this whole sequence conveying plenty about how things are going to be, establishing overall contexts, thee vibe, that the soundtrack fucks, that nobody's messing around here in the least like. just as these first minutes didn't have to go so hard, so neither will the rest of the series have had to. i also didn't have to say all this or post at all but i get hype and when i have anything to say i really do. no concision. oh shit and we end with like the directional reverse of the first opening stylish shot but w/cassian in frame as well yeahh boyyee

going for a VERY niche audience with this one but just...hear me out

wof headcanons but theyre oddly food and substance related for some reason

Although I understand why Tui didn't include very much info abt alchohol or drugs in a kids book there is an extreme lack of culinary related world building so here are some ideas I had while on this train of thought :)

SeaWings tend to be foodies and are generally given cooking classes in school. Which if you think about it, is rather important, because like 60 percent of the creatures in the ocean are poisonous and the rest have parasites and nasty germs so they need to know whats up when it comes to food safety.

SeaWings use a lot of citrus in their food and drinks and they also use it for fragrances and stuff they just really like it

SeaWing nobles commonly eat fugu and there have been assassinations where a chef was bribed to not properly take out the poison so the dragon eating it would die

SeaWings drink to taste. SkyWings drink to forget what century it is.

SkyWings typically eat their meat raw but on special occasions they will barbecue it and put some spices n stuff on it. They don't eat much else besides meat but they do like spicy things like peppers and they also like strong onion or garlic flavors. The little masochists. Anyway,

SkyWings don't really like sweet things and many of them can't even taste them so they're like wtf is a dessert

man do they love them some olives tho. Olives everywhere. In their drink. Out of the jar. On their meat. Oil on their scales. Oil in their hygiene products. They started trading them from the Sand and SeaWings millennia ago but theyve selectively bred ones that grow in the mountains

This one's more drugs than food but SkyWings will sometimes take some kind of stimulant before battle like a beserker so they're all fired up heheh

MudWings are excellent meal preparers and sibs like to all cook together so they'll make a big pot of stew or something

They like bread and desserts, they have easy access to sugar cane being along the east coast and they also use a lot of honey. They're re into canning stuff too, they have a lot of raspberries and blackberries and strawberries in their temperate forest areas and they grow them to make jam and wine and they use honey to make mead

basically they are Cottagecore(TM) and I love them

They also eat lots of freshwater fish and crawfish and whatnot

And they also eat a lot of tatoes

Vanilla grows in the swamps, they use that in their cakes

MudWings deserve some appreciation goddamnit their kingdom is biologically diverse and beautiful

SandWings have tequila because. Yknow. Cactus.

They eat a lot of bugs and lizards, they don't really need to eat every day so it's not a huge deal

they do like coconuts tho and they use coconut oil in a lot of their hygiene products as well as in their cooking

They deep fry a lot of shit. Idk where i got this but trust me. They love things with lots of fat in it bc they need all they can get

Really sticky sweet desserts and candy; enjoyers of those one lollipops with the mealworms or whatever tf in them

also canning stuff like bone broth is very important

pickled cactus as well

rhey probably have a festival when cactus fruit goes in season

what even is IceWing cuisine.

Well way up north where there's nothing but ice it's pretty bad and the dragons have to eat just plain ass meat and seafood, but down into the tundras there's some pretty good stuff like cinnamon, pines for tea, honey berries, and other foraging as well as more diversity of meats

They would probably eat sushi

All the other tribes like to make fun of them and rightfully so bc their food is so plain

they make good honey berry wine tho

Maube that's why theyre so damn grumpy

RainWings are expert foragers ofc but they don't really feel the need to prepare their food in any way

They are, however, in constant dire need of sodium because they get absolutely none from their fruit

So anything salty is wow

Maybe rhey have a place near the mud kingdom border where they can grow some asparagus for salt

they are also the only tribe besides Night that can eat chocolate but forgor 💀 how to make it so the NightWings and them have to re figure it out together

Salted dark chocolate bing bang boom instant delicacy

NightWings used to be able to cook really well, especially desserts and pastry, but they forgor while they were trying to not die on the volcano

if ur requests r still open and u rnt overwhelmed AND if youre okay with what im abt to request...

heres a thought. euronymous and like opposite style innocent reader (mb i love dark guys and innocent bimbo-y girlfriends)

so theyve had sex before obvi. and typically she just lays there and is disinterested because frankly.... he has a little fear of breaking her and shes like "this isnt enough for me :((" so one day she just looks up at euro like "smack me." and it shocks him ! and when he does it opens a door for both of them. they like impact play 🤷‍♀️ and sprinkle a little bit of euro breeding kink but not rly breeding just more like "im cumming in u coz ur mine and i want everyone to know it when your bellys full and round" not rly like "i want u to have my babies" coz i think he wouldnt like babies.

mb that was a bit tm ranting woopsies

i love opposites attract type of stuff, im obsessed!!

"he dyes his hair black, i dye mine platinum blonde" | euronymous

me & my boyfriend. - lana del rey

p.s. this story has nothing to do with oystein aarseth. this is rory's portrayal of the character.

bimbo!female!reader x euronymous

contents: spanking, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie

you two were as different as could be. you were like day and night. he went around trying to instill fear into the souls of all who made the mistake of looking in his direction. and you always looked like a child's doll, the way you were always dolled up making you extremely pleasing to the eye.

you never showed any interest in the dark and evil stuff that euronymous invested all his time into. you revolved your life around looking good and geting everything you wanted, giving the impression that you were soft and fragile.

that's why euronymous always tried to be as gentle with you as possible when it came to sex. he would go painfully slowly, always asking if he should stop. you had always appreciated him being so kind to you, but you couldnt help but yearn for something more than all that.

so the night you asked him to completely have his way with you, he was completely taken by surprised. "a-are you sure? i wouldnt wanna hurt you or anything, y'know." you continued to insist, but he kept on resisting. this went on for a while before you snapped and decided to take matters into your own hands.

without any further communication, you took off your miniskirt and tight shirt, throwing them to the side. you sat on the bed, only in your hot pink thong and matching bra. he attempted to speak, but his words got caught in his throat as his eyes wandered down your beautiful body. no matter how many times he saw you like this, his reaction would never change.

you turned around and stuck your head into a pillow, putting your ass in the air. "spank me." your voice was slightly muffled, but he heard you loud and clear. he hesitated, but seeing that you were actually serious made him want it almost as badly as you did.

you got behind you, his hands on your hips, gently rubbing your soft skin before he raised his hand and laid the first slap. you winced in pain, but you kept yourself together. you heard euronymous chuckle, and you knew that it was about to get a lot worse. finally, your fantasies were being fulfilled.

he lands another hard slap on your ass, this on stinging even more, making you whimper enough for him to hear. it sounded like music to his ears. he continued to spank you, each slap getting more and more painful. you could tell that he was enjoying this. this was something that he'd been dreaming of for a long time.

your hips got a little sore from keeping them up for so long, so you lowered them a little. euronymous started to unbuckle his belt, throwing it to the side. he slapped your ass once more. "ass up, whore." he said, his voice lower than usual.

you whined as you stuck your hips back into the air. euronymous undid his pants and pulled out his already hard cock out. he ripped your thong off of you, your little pussy aching to be fucked. he smiled at the sight, thinking of all the things that he was going to do to you.

he rubbed your slit gently with his thumb before stuffing you with his cock. you let out a loud, slutty moan. euronymous had never heard anything like it before considering how gentle he always was with you.

he wasted no time quickly thrusting into you, his hips coming into contact with yours making a loud slapping sound each time. you started falling apart instantly. you had never felt this way before. he was being so rough and wreckless with you, but you loved it.

your moans got louder and louder, along with the sounds of euronymous slapping your ass. he fucked you at an inhumanly fast pace, finally letting out all these years of sexual tension. he had always fantasized about being able to destroy your insides and make you go completely dumb on his cock.

he kept a firm grip on your hips as he pounded into your sore little pussy, whispering things that couldnt be heard underneath the sound of your moans and whimpers. you felt you pussy tightening around his cock, signalling your orgasm coming.

his groans became more audible as he felt you getting tigther around him. he wanted to make you cum harder than you ever have before. he reached a hand forward and started rubbing fast circles on your throbbing clit, sending you over the edge.

your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you came all over his cock, which was still pounding into you at lightning speed. you felt your vision going blurry as he started to overstimulate you. you sobbed as you started cumming even harder, making his cock throb inside of you.

he started speaking to you in between strained groans. "a-ah... gonna fuck my cum into you... gonna fill you up real good..." you felt your body completely surrendering to him as you felt a second orgasm about to him.

with the feeling of your pussy squeezing him, he started releasing his hot cum into you, making you feel so warm and full. his nails dug into your skin as he reached hit orgasm, throwing his head back as he continued to fuck you. he kept going until you were leaking his and your cum.

he finally pulled out of your sore little cunt, flipping you over so he could see you. your mascara was completely ruined, your lipgloss was smudged, and your cheeks were flushed, making you look like a total mess.

euronymous grinned before giving you a kiss on the forehead. "such a pretty girl... i think i like your makeup better this way." you rolled your eyes. euronymous spread you legs and sat himself right infront of your pussy.

he used his fingers to spread your lips so he could watch all the cum drip out of you. needless to say, sex got a lot more entertaining from then on.

author's note: so sorry this took a while to come out, i can procrastinate for the olympic i swear. im working on another request rn dont worry yall :))

Very short and sweet Serennedy Analysis of the Seperate Ways DLC

Obvious spoilers disclaimer but also this is NOT supposed to be a diss at any ships whatsoever!!!!!!!! I love them all!!!!!!! My current hyperfixation is just on Serennedy and I see a lot of potential for it in the DLC!!!!!!!

• Ok first and most obvious. Right at the beginning, the part everyone was screaming about in the trailer, is that Luis’ first thought is to tell Ada that there is One More Thing (tm) he has to do, and that’s to help Leon, and Ada’s IMMEDIATE reaction is to be like “….ok.” I have a feeling in this context that she KNOWS how much Leon means to Luis. She KNOWS that he’s HIS priority, and that’s why she lets him go

• Again more obvious scene, but when Luis sees that the room containing the medicine intended for Leon is on fire he RUNS THROUGH A BURNING FRICKEN BUILDING TO GO RETRIEVE IT. His immediate thought (in my mind at least) is that he doesn’t wanna see Leon die in the same was his Grandfather did metaphorically. He couldn’t save his Grandfather because he was powerless, and now he’s powerless to save the medicine that would save Leon’s life. Hell, he even says “it’s all gone!! That was my last chance to set things right!!!” When Ada questions him on why this was so important to him. It’s because he cares deeply about Leon and wants to set things right. God. I love him SO much.

• Also I’ve mentioned this before, but Luis seems a LOT more relaxed/ jokey with Ada, and if you ask me, I think that’s a sure fire sign that Leon’s been putting on an act to impress Leon. He wants Leon to think he’s cool and self assured so that he’ll like him more, and in a similar vein with Ada, he dies before Leon can see that REAL side of him. JUST when Luis opens up about Umbrella, he’s stabbed in the back. It’s so sad. Sobbing,, crying,,,,

• HOOOOOOO BOY THAT SCENE WHERE HE SAVES ADA???????? I LOVE that we see his hesitancy to run because he can’t decide wether it’s worth running off to Leon or helping Ada whose in more urgent danger and he chooses Ada because he’s a GOOD PERSON WHO CARES ABT HER,,,, BUT THEN WHEN ADA SAYS “go. Besides, you have a promise to keep” SHE K N O W S HE NEEDS TO GET BACK TO LEON. SHE KNOWS HOW MUCH HE CARES ABT HIM RUARGH. AND THAT FACE?????? OH MY GOD????????

• Holy shit his death scene…………. When he’s on the phone with Ada and he goes “oh, and take care of Leon for me will you?” HIS FIRST THOUGHT IS ALWAYS LEON. AND THEN HES LIKE “gotta go, Leon needs my help” AND HE CALLS OUT FOR HIM?????? AND YOU CAN HEAR HIM DYING ITS SO AHSNWHENEJE

• And then ofc we see the death scene from a distance where Leon rushes to his side and holds his hand, and I feel like that only solidifies their affection for one another to me. As my beloved mutual said, ‘Luis got to spend the rest of his life with Leon but Leon never got to spend the rest of his life with Luis’ I can’t. Brb I’m gonna go cry after writing this all.

Kaeya headcanons

i'm speedrunning this before work while my breakfast is cooking so BEAR WITH ME, i have SO MANY thoughts on my bbgrl

current list of h/c's: - ice skater kaeya, i will die on this hill. will have a post abt that one day b/c there's so much to it that i want to scream abt and Thoughts (tm) to be had (like him getting flustered??? OUGH i need to restrain myself) - speaking of flustered, he's really good at keeping his cool (pun fully intended, fight me) and he typically is the one who CAUSES the flustering. smooth af and KNOWS it - he likes to cause chaos and mayhem. a bit of a gremlin. mischievous man. perhaps a tad prankster in his bones. playful teasing bastard and has a lot of fun w/ it. - cold hands. nothing more. - when push comes to shove, Kaeya's the guy w/ the plan. like genuinely he's incredibly strategic and has the main plan, and like two or three back up plans. it's not even like an anxiety thing he just wants to be prepared, and he makes them up pretty last minute. - he's kind of an assassin-style character, y'know? not as much of a main fighter as he is a sneaky backstabber. roguish and charming but can and will yeet u type deal right??? - LOYAL to a GODDAMN FAULT. i TRULY believe this man's loyalty is unshakeable. like he'd do anything to the people he cherishes the most. and if he perceives u as a threat??? a threat to the things he cares about?????? ur on the list now and there's no escape. - incredibly perceptive! like he's really good at getting information from people already, but i feel like that just makes it a lot easier for him to notice when Something Is Up. it's hard to catch him unawares. - kaeya's great and i love him but he doesn't love himself and i'm sorry this man definitely feels like he's got really bad self esteem. Like he KNOWS he can get shit done, but he has a hard time believing that anyone likes him and probably has trust issues b/c of it. - i also feel like he doesn't like the spotlight? like specifically Kaeya; if he needs to put on a persona for the spotlight, it doesn't phase him bc he's good at hiding behind a persona. but the moment Actual Kaeya gets spotlight he's like a bit of a mess and nervous and would just rathe people enjoy themselves. essentially just doesn't want the spotlight. - abandonment issues. i don't need to explain this one. - kaeya puts on the air of an anti-hero but he's a quiet paragon himself. literally helps people out of habit and while he jokes abt it he doesn't actually expect anything in return and literally forgets he helped ppl bc it's just so engrained in his brain. - epitome of "sorry i had feelings, i'll replace em w/ jokes right away" - not the best cook tbh? like he can make some GOOD snacks (chicken mushroom skewers, a fried egg, simple stuff like that) but ask him to cook actual meals and he's at a loss for food prep and has no idea how to time everything in the dish. - emotionally available but only for other ppl. cannot and will not express his own emotions bc of aforementioned anxieties; but u wanna talk to him abt shit? he's all ears and will comfort u like a bbgrl. - this is less of a h/c but actually canon, and that's just that Kaeya's lonely. i genuinely think he wants to be around ppl but he feels like they wouldn't like the real him :(( - on that note, i WILL say that, despite his playfulness, this man is a romantic at heart??? like he probably LOVES poetry and writing and music, and the only reason he makes light of it is b/c he thinks it's funny and also to make people underestimate him. he would probably die for the opera performances in Fontaine tbh. OKAY,,, i've gotta hurry up and wrap this post bc i have work soon but please here thank u this is my bbgrl kaeya i love him so much. he has been in my main party since day one and like i'm beyond attached to this lil shit, like PLEASE HIS VOICELINES ARE SO GOOD. i will talk more abt my kaelumi h/c's and explain how things go in my "canon", b/c i'm trying to go in order of how all the poly met each other. WHICH means that Zhongli's next!!! b/c ofc i'm going to scream abt him, my friend's playing his archon quest and letting me watch it again and i'm taking so many notes its not even FUNNY.

I am brain rotting so hard over the trent and colin dynamic rn, I love them so much, football kiddos au or canon, I adore them

ok so the THING IS.......... the Thing Is. i could talk about trent and colin forever. they are just. they are soooooooo!

it's the way trent was the first one to realize that colin is gay. it's the way he, a reporter of Many Years and known gossip fiend, kept that secret for colin without even Telling Colin That He Knew. and he could have! he very easily could have approached colin at any point during the season and been like, yo. i know what you are dot png. but he didn't! he chose to give colin the space to keep that secret, UNTIL he felt that colin was actively putting himself in "danger"/isolating himself to a concerning extent from the rest of the team. (i also think his Rainbow Mug TM was absolutely his subtle way of signaling to colin that he is a safe person, but colin is one of the himbos so we know how well that went). and then. and then!!! amsterdam!!!!! this was trent putting his foot down and being like. okay. you don't want people to know, that's fine. but i know, and you are not alone. You Are Not Alone. WAUUUUUUUUUGH.

ok this is getting Incredibly Long so i've put my football kiddos au-specific thoughts beneath the cut.

so........yeah. yeah!! for the football kiddos au, i ABSOLUTELY had to have trent and colin be a fabulous da and son duo. in my mind, colin was adopted when he was around 5, so the two of them have been in each others' lives for almost half of colin's life. and to me, trent is, like. Thee Ultimate Cool Dad. he's dorky as HELL but has just enough journalistic swagger that kids overlook his obscure literature references in favor of his Hella Fantastic Hair, etc. except colin. colin sees STRAIGHT through his da and he is Not Impressed. he has made it his life's mission to ensure that trent understands precisely how Uncool He Is. but if anyone else dares to tell colin that trent is weird, colin WILL bite their face off. there's a fierce protectiveness on both sides, and colin vets absolutely every single person who makes an attempt to date trent, and trent is fairly chill to let colin roam around and mess up and have fun and generally just Be A Kid. i also have a Lot of feelings abt how growing up with trent will lead to colin being a much more secure person, not only in regards to being gay but also just in generally aspect of his life, because colin is a Very Insecure Person! he doesn't have a lot of belief in himself, and he's not the best footballer, and.......and etc., etc. trent being colin's da will let colin grow up far more confident in Every Way, and i think colin being trent's son allows trent to in turn accept and discover his own sexuality much earlier, simply because. hey. i have this kiddo, and i want them to understand that it is okay to be who you are in this world. wait a minute. i should take my own advice. hmm.

and then there's the random mustachioed american next door and embarrassing flirting rituals and colin is banging his head into the wall because da. Da. Stop Being So Shameful. and then there's the dude with angry caterpillar eyebrows and his tiny five year old brother and trent is shoving colin down the hall because son. Son. There Is a Friend. Go. and they all meet and become a family and all is right in the world!!!!!!

HI please shout about your ahab and fedallah ideas im so curious, what you did say sounds sooo cool and good. theyre... i have my own normal feelings about them general, but its more of a narrative relationship thing than like- them actually interacting?? idk. im fascinated your work has a grasp on my psyche for real

HI YES OK I LOVE THEM SM ok ok so

all of this was kinda just born from me thinking abt what i can do w/ fedallah to fix how shitty & racist he’s treated by the og narrative and just sorta. asking questions abt him and taking those answers to their logical conclusions , and filling in the gaps w my own personal thoughts where needed

ie: why is fedallah on this ship? why would be put his life at risk for this? not just the general deadly risk of whaling, but also the legal/social implications of the fact that he’s a stowaway and the shipowners definitely do not approve of him being on board? he (and the other four of ahab’s oarsmen) certainly is not getting paid by the shipowners for this; did ahab offer them portions of the captain’s pay instead? we know ahab wanted a boat’s crew of his own, but why did he ask for fedallah, specifically? why does he trust fedallah so much — both to be his harpooner, and with his prophecies&foresight? why are they so devoted to each other, such that fedallah is constantly referred to as ahab’s shadow?

the answer to a lot of these came very naturally like: okay, they must’ve been friends. they must’ve been close. they must’ve known each other for some time, and in such a way that ahab would trust fedallah this much, and fedallah would be so willing to massively inconvenience & risk himself for him.

^thats what i can get from the text (wringing it out though i must, since melville refuses to tell us this himself, but it’s what we can infer based on what we know)

the rest of this is my (head)canon territory (aka canon to the comic) and me filling in the blanks:

- ahab saved fedallah’s life, once. i think that’s how they met. in ch 19 “the prophet” elijah tells us ahab was once in a “deadly scrimmage with [a] spaniard;” i’m stealing that to say that that fight was an encounter where aforementioned spaniard was targeting fedallah, and ahab as passerby got a bit caught up in it but, seeing a fellow brown dude tm in trouble, stepped in & saved him.

(also: consider—sexy sword fight ahab. that is all. i know the text just calls it a “scrimmage” without specifics but like. sword fight. swords. ahab w a sword. that’s all)

anyway. they’re in spain maybe? the text says “deadly scrimmage with a spaniard before the altar in Santa,” which i can only assume is referring to holy week in spain / santa semana? and, since we also know this fight was “deadly” and ahab is, ahem, not dead, by this point, obviously the other guy must’ve died, so ahab&fedallah probably skedaddle very quickly. back to ahab’s ship, probably, which was likely just temporarily making port in spain for whatever reason.

- from then, fedallah very much clings to ahab — you saved my life; i owe you a debt; if ever you need anything of me etc etc, you know how it goes. ahab brushes off the offers and claims of a favor in return; you don’t need to do anything for me, i don’t begrudge you this, i don’t feel you owe me anything. it’s fine mdude.

- anyway. they’re besties!! they enjoy each other’s company! fedallah is a frequent (though not necessarily permanent) member of ahab’s ship rosters. they bond over being SWANA in the good ol’ us of a. fedallah teaches ahab how to make chai properly — he never got to learn; his mother died far too early in his life (book canon). they probably fucked once (1) on a drunken night and then mutually decide never to do that again /lh.

fedallah’s also disabled — he wears a knee brace on his right leg, perhaps an aftermath of that fight w the spaniard, perhaps from something before — when ahab gets disableified by The Dickening TM fedallah’s council on how to manage pain and other things like that is extremely helpful.

and ahab never takes fedallah up on that favor. he doesn’t think he needs to; he has no desire to. fedallah is his friend. he doesn’t view their relationship that way; he genuinely doesn’t feel like fedallah owes him anything, for saving him or for anything else.

- & then moby dick happens.

- moby dick happens and ahab loses his leg and spends weeks on his own ship tied and restrained to his own bed because his own crew decided that him — in his newly disabled, unable to walk, but in Pain and “Insane” state — is too much of a threat to be allowed to exist freely. and he spends weeks straitjacketed to his own bed.

and then he gets back to shore and his own prosthetic snaps underneath him and stabs him in the abdomen and nearly kills him and it’s taking him weeks to recover, and those shipowners are talking about sending him out again anyways, even though he’s still in the middle of recovering from That, and if we’re being honest still hasn’t properly recovered or healed from losing his leg in the first place — did you know that the first few months after an amputation are the most important when it comes to long term healing of the scar tissue? and we know he wasn’t able to take care of himself in those critical weeks, lashed to his bed, muscles atrophying and whole body growing sore as it’s forced to stay in one position for god knows how long on end, and oh he’s going to be in pain for the rest of his life because of this, isn’t he.

so they’re putting him back on the pequod while he’s still in recovery. the last time he was on that ship while recovering from a major wound, his officers tied him up like an animal. he doesn’t know if he can trust these new officers, though they weren’t on that voyage. he doesn’t know if he can even trust his own body, his own prosthetic leg, to not fail him, to not break on him and incapacitate him again.

so he needs an ally on this ship. he needs someone he can trust.

so he asks for fedallah. finally calls in that favor, even though he’d never planned to.

- anyway, in terms of how i’d describe their relationship, it’s basically what i said in the tags of that post fjskdjsj they’re not friends they’re not lovers they’re not family but also they’re all of the above and also more; there aren’t words for them to talk about what they are to each other; they trust each other and are devoted to one another and imo losing fedallah on the second day of the chase is the final nail in the coffin of the tragedy that just keeps building.

like, when fedallah tells ahab in chapter 116 that fedallah will die first, and ahab will follow, ahab doesn’t take that as a thing to be worried about: he takes it as another pledge that he will survive this voyage.

and when it actually happens, well. look how ahab responds:

even with melville’s inability to treat fedallah like an actual person, ahab is more panicked than we ever see him when he realizes fedallah is gone. and yeah, you could argue that he’s just panicked that he’s going to die because fedallah died first, but if you listen carefully to a lot of what ahab says throughout the book, he’s not actually that afraid of himself dying. that might still be cause for panic here, sure, but i also very much choose to read this as shocked grief — gone? not gone! not gone! — his friend is fucken dead!!!

- (also worth nothing that immediately between those two passages^ is starbuck begging ahab to turn around once again, saying how many awful things have happened already, and one of the things he says is “thy evil shadow gone” — and immediately after starbuck’s speech, we get ye infamous “of late I’ve felt strangely moved to thee; ever since that hour we both saw—thou know’st what, in one another’s eyes” from ahab immediately followed by him ultimately rejecting starbuck and life and the possibility to turn around and etc etc — and with this context? w the context of having Just lost fedallah only to have yet another person calling him ahab’s “”evil”” shadow in a long litany of people who have spent the entire book hounding fedallah as evil and the devil? i don’t know, it’s hard not to read these lines from ahab as almost spiteful. i once saw something in your eyes. i can’t see anything anymore but this. this was always going to be the outcome — ‘twas rehearsed by thee and me a billion years before this ocean rolled.’)

- ow.

- fedallah makes me ache. we know so little about him and he does nothing tangibly wrong but he spends the entire book being derided by both the narrative and the other characters as some evil hellish monster. and for what. look at him. he’s just a silly little guy. he was ahab’s friend. he had to have been.

- it’s important to me that you know that fedallah is much, much shorter than ahab. he’s a short king

plus bonus fedallah’s full design because i love him:

hullo! I read your chapter of your au with the Very Horrible Lex and the Very Baby Kon and the Very Sad Clark and i love it sosososo much! The GOOD ANGST my dood.

I want you to know i’ve been daydreaming abt it. Heck, i was daydreaming WHILE reading it- i mean that’s actually normal for me when i’m invested in smthn, but fr i kept getting distracted by So Many Thoughts and Feelings tm. Took me longer to read than it should’ve but rest assured that’s a positive thing!

i read the fic you based it on, and it was great! But so far im liking yours better >v>

I wanna see the rescue and the recovery! I wanna see it get worse first! I wanna see Clark attempt to raise Kon the best he can in the worst of circumstances! The love and human connection thriving even in the midst of a hurricane of cruelty— it’s so good bestie!

uhh anyway! The point of this ask: I wanna know, how did you come up with the title? “We shall be free; we shall find peace”? oVo?

Thank you!! That's basically how it came about, daydreaming about the fic that inspired it!

So I really love the fanfic tradition of using lowercase AestheticTM song lyrics as titles. Fic is already inherently intertextual, and I think it's fun to add another layer of intertextuality onto that; I named one of my other fics with a lyric mostly because 1. the lyric fits their relationship! and 2. the juxtaposition between Wholesome Radio Pop Lyric and soft d/s xeno tentacle pwp still makes me laugh.

At first the draft was just called 'horrible lex au,' and then I thought about using two other quotes before settling on the title. That's the tl;dr of it all, the rest of this is under a cut for plot spoilers for the overall arc of the entire fic, and also so, so much rambling:

The first title I was thinking about was be sure your heart is brave from Aeschylus' Agamemnon, but that quote is the chorus speaking to Cassandra right before she's about to be killed; her bravery is a heavy burden reaction to the monstrous injustices that have brought her to that point, like Clark and Kon... but then she's brutally murdered. Plus the power dynamic situation is... let's say, very different. It's an extraordinary, immortal line but the narrative arc I've got planned strays too far from the original arc, and in the end I decided I didn't want the shadow of a way better tragedy hanging over my little fanfic.

Chorus: Woman, be sure your heart is brave; you can take much. Cassandra: None but the unhappy ever hear such praise.

The next line I was thinking about went too far in the other direction, taste a morning out there, which is from one of the best 'I Want' songs, Out There from the Disney Hunchback of Notre Dame. Quasimodo's story of being thought monstrous and being imprisoned and gaslit by a socially powerful manipulator parallels Clark and Kon better than Cassandra's, but in the end the literal line itself doesn't fit right with either Clark or Kon. Clark, at the beginning of the fic, has atrophied to the point where he can only conceive wanting for such things through wanting them for Kon, and Kon, as we'll see soonish, isn't locked up underground the way Clark is. Plus, the fic is... lighter than the Orestia for sure but a hell of a lot grimmer than Disney, lol. I do have it on my writing playlist though.

So in the end I went back to one of my absolute favorite pieces of media ever, Fidelio. We shall be free; we shall find peace is a line from the Prisoner's Chorus in that opera. The solo prisoner that sings the line invites the rest of the prisoners to begin hoping, and from there, despite the sobering reminders of the dangers they face, that they're being watched, the music swells into a yearning for freedom so powerful it's difficult to understand how it passed the censors in 1805.

First solo: Hope whispers softly to me: We shall be free, we shall find peace. Chorus: Oh Heavens! Salvation! What happiness! Oh freedom, freedom, will you return? Second solo: Speak softly! Be on your guard! [The jailer's] eyes and ears are on us.

And then - the head jailer returns, and the prisoners are brought back to reality, forced back into their dark cells at the end of the act. The temporary respite is over.

Farewell, warm sunshine - how quickly you fly from us. Night is fallen upon us, from which no day shall break.

The simple act of hoping is like a breath of fresh air, temporarily alleviating their suffering, but it doesn't materially change their circumstances; it takes a number of outside forces to do that, which will be paralleled in the fic. Love and hope is all they have, and it's not enough, but it does make the torment bearable until Bruce/Leonora uncovers the extent of The Horrors and Diana/Don Fernando can deus ex machina everyone into the sunlight.

All in all, the line is a very succinct summary of the plot. Clark and Kon will be free, and they will find peace, but they have to find out what both of those mean, reclaiming their agency in the process.

oooor at least that's the plan. chapter 2 is about 90% edited and can probably be ready this weekend, I hit a little plot snag in chapter 3-5 so chunks of that are undergoing rewrites, but the good news there is that the rewrites are SO much better than the original draft and there will be some bats showing up earlier than there otherwise would have been. I did uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh kind of lose my job a few days after posting the first part, so updates will be slower than I'd like, especially since I'll have to move to a different state if I get the positions I'm currently applying to 😓

Asks are getting kinda long so. Mostly, I wonder why Reddit is so ticked off at Mac lmao. Everywhere I go, it's either insane villain apologism by making the hero pathetic and wrong, or extreme villain antagonism by overblowing consequences. Bud got dragged out of hell after centuries, got a super snack out of MK's powers, vented in a theatre before a trauma flashback of MK coming to whoop his butt reminded him of SWK and couldn't even skedaddle before Not-Mayor forced him into a symmetrical wardrobe, I mean. an unwilling henchminion arc, and proceeded to get his butt whooped by the gang who love to target his trauma eye and get looney tunes whumped by electrocution in a giant lantern, tossed over a ship, and my little pony friendship is magic style song blasted in his ears. and whatever hell portal Not-Mayor dunked his head in while chained up, a few times over. he was about to throw up with that face he made when LBD semi-possessed him. I think that's enough consequences, he already got The Talk(tm) tied up again w MK, (a compliant hostage) and mostly keeps vagueing warnings to the squad, being very idgaf about LBD. Not much villain behavior compared to others I've seen. He's not even an anti-villain, he's just a self-driven traumatized survivor who vents to people in ambiguous closed off ways and tends to cross over into jerk territory. So I'm here like, are half of tumblr/reddit posts out-dated, bc if someone isn't salty about S1 Mac (rare) they are TICKED about past!Mac (frequent) to which I ask, what did bro DO. I have never seen fandom run on such hypothetical anger before. What I miss, because past!Mac's issues are just vocalized as "never made his own choices." which, is NOT a thing to apologize abt? if anything, it would fuel the fire? It sounds like a reason to ditch your friends instead of following along and passively complaining. A lot of it is also abandoning SWK, but. he visited the mountain? I see a lot about Flower Fruit burning taken from JTTW which is interesting (so yeah, I think fandom relies on the book a lot for their character feelings) bc SWK learns that after beating LBD three times WHICH IS INTERESTING because Mac says "looks like OUR OLD FRIEND The Lady Bone Demon is back" our old friend?? OUR?? by osmosis I thought their break up happened because they couldn't beat her together, and then I watched the show and there was nothing on that. but since learning the twitter post theory about memory manip, well. ShadowPeach just got more tragic. its too bad tho, I would've loved a story of accidentally killing your best friend and realizing after instead of another oh no it was this other villain behind it. but alright. it makes too much sense tho based on SWK's reactions.

OH I DIDNT EVEN CATCH THAT “OUR” bit!! it does beg the question a little bit of “why did she resurrect him then,” but at the same time, it’s a very interesting theory!!

Hehe hi Pik :0 I'll give you three questions for your ask game and you can pick out whatever you want to answer <:]

What are your thoughts on Kaigaku? I know he's a bit of spoiler territory but I'm curious .. or maybe what are your thoughts on Muichiro? You decide!

A question just for me, though ,, do YOU have a favorite bird? .., !!

oh abolutely HYSTERICAL to give a pick scenario and then lay down topics that will instantly get me to talk for hours on end at the drop of a hat KSJNGFKDJNGKD

so!! the easy one!! my favorite bird, ithink, is between the mourning dove and the house sparrow! they are not terribly glamorous but i love them so so dearly and will instantly cheer up when i think about them :')

as for the character questions. thank you for enabling me HJBSJFBJD

i could very very easily write an entire goddamn essay about Either of them, but for the sake of saving whatever brevity i can manage to keep, ill save talking abt mui for when That Episode(tm) drops whenever it does, because inevitebly, i will be Absolutely Inconsolable and it Will happen anyway KJNDKGDF

instead, for now, under a cut because this preamble is already paragraphs long... kaigaku.

i fucking hate this man. i cannot stand him, hes the worst, he is so fucking stupid, i think about him fucking constantly, and he is one of my favorites. he is so fucking insufferable, and i love him!

ok so. getting into kny, i was like. immediately a zenitsu liker. like i saw him and went "god. fuck. shit. its gonna be this nerd i dont even know about yet and i can feel it already." (i was right.) which is Crucial to knowing the angle here. and when i got to his part in th manga, i . genuinely dont remember if i even thought too hard about him. i dont even remember when i Did, i just know that he Wasnt there, and then he Was, and he Never Fucking Left KSJNKDJGN

which is very very fucking funny, considering... how much of a character he straight up Isnt.

like yeah! he sure does show up in a flashback and then fights zen and dies about it! it takes like, a two chapters max! and the entire time, his only character trait is "bitch for no reason." like... that sure isn't a lot to go off of. so like... why? i guess thats kind of the answer in and of itself.

why is he like this? why is he like this?? what made him this way? we know he grew up orphaned, but why? we knew he turned on gyomei's group and ran, but why? we know he trained to be a demon slayer with zen and kuwajima, but why? why, why, why? we just don't know.

we know he's a survivalist. we know that he's willing to go to any lengths, stoop to any lows, just to make it another day. because another day is another chance you get to get them back, to prove them wrong, to rise above it and laugh in their faces and say "see? see what im capable of? bet you feel sorry now."

shame doesnt exist to him. he will make Anything of himself just to make it by. do anything, drop anyone. no connections, impermanence. its clear in flashbacks that, honestly... nobody liked him very much. and like, well, yeah. obviously. he sucks, and he isnt afraid to show it. but isnt that just so strange? broken box of happiness, disatisfaction. he refuses to forge connections, claiming the only people he tolerates are those who respect him, who see his worth.

and that's... the weird thing about him. see, because, the thing is that... i don't fucking believe him for a second. he talks big game, he can back it up, sure, especially as a demon, but... the entire time he talks, every word he says during his confrontation with zen just felt like a bluff. like he's trying to sound threatening, to sound powerful, making a threat display like an animal. every technique he chooses to execute is some new, big, flashy display of his Power, talking, taunting, still taunting.

its a lot of reading between lines, but... this man is a fucking liar. that fight felt different, it felt quick, and well... maybe because it wasn't a fight. this was some guy taking out his anger on someone in a desperate attempt to prove he's worth something.

i just think that this man is a deeply jealous bastard intent on making himself seem larger than he really is, convincing himself that he's the one that's right and it's everyone else that's wrong simply because he can't process just how awful he is.

growing up barely scraping by on his own, of course he'd become painfully self-reliant. of course he would take advantage of anything he could, anyone he could. you'd have to be that self-centered to survive. talk big, act big, nobody will mess with you. nobody can take advantage of you if you take advantage of them first.

and when he gets shown that kindness, being taken in for the first time... of course he'd take advantage of them too. he's hard-wired with instability in mind, so obviously the clear answer is to take what you can and go before something else happens and they get to you first (even if that was never really a threat.) and if they throw you out for it? it's just proof you were right. you were always right, clearly it isn't your fault. and if you happen to throw them under the bus for it... well, obviously they deserved it. there's no reason to think about it anymore.

being with kuwajima was fine. we don't know anything about the earlier days (which im so sad about) but from the looks of it, he was doing fine. about as fine as he could be, at least. he clearly respected him at first, enjoyed being treated as something special, having his work and talents appreciated-- which he did have! he was a staggeringly impressive slayer, but that's an aside-- and even berated zenitsu for supposedly "disrespecting him" by referring to him as jiichan. which. sighs.

so, zenitsu. dynamics Of Ever. honestly, even without the whole Contention there, kai would've just kinda disliked him because he's... motions with hand. look at him. but its the fact that they were considered together that pissed kaigaku off so much. because that implied that they were on the same level when, to him, they so very clearly were not.

zenitsu was annoying. he was weak, whined too much, cried too much, never put in any effot, he was so, so annoying. which made it that much more insulting that jiichan would continue to try to train him. just leave him behind already! he keeps trying to run away, let him! obviously he just isn't good enough. he's not special like he was. and yet, kuwajima kept trying.

and the fact that he did... probably completely went against everything kaigaku saw in the way the world worked. for lack of a better term, he was very "survival of the fittest" minded in that, if you weren't good, you just weren't good. you'd try and struggle and inevitably die off. the world isn't kind, and will take any chance it has to kick you down. that's why you take what you can, when you can.

if you're weak, nobody helps you. if nobody helps you, you either help yourself or die silently. that was what separated the weak and the strong. and you always, always were either one or the other. again, that's his survivalism talking. so, seeing this person he at the very least Respected waste time on some nobody instead of him, expecting something to come of it... well, it was insulting!

and to think that they were even anywhere close enough to put together? to share the title of successor? with this guy? either it meant that kuwajima thought zenitsu was as good as kai was (to him, a laughable idea,) or that kai wasn't any better than some kid who could barely swing a sword. and that was what irritated him the most.

that was the point of their final confrontation. it was kaigaku proving, once and for all, finally, that he was better than zenitsu. was it purely out of hatred for this kid who looked up to him like a brother? was it out of jealousy of someone who got so many kindnesses granted to him despite, to him, not really deserving it? was it just to prove that he was a powerful demon to those who now had their eyes on him, too? whatever it was, at its core... it was laughing in the faces of those who, honestly, genuinely cared about him (and in his eyes, never truly did.)

he could've ended that fight whenever he wanted to-- its even stated in canon that zen wouldve just lost if he was given more time to grow-- but... he just kept showing off. kept talking. it didnt feel like he was using techniques to fit the combat-- it felt like he was showing off what he could do now. he was proving a point. the only thing that stopped him was what he never acknowledged back when they were training together-- that zenitsu did have worth. that he was growing, too. and using what kaigaku refused to acknowledge in him, zenitsu cut him down-- with a symbol of the respect and comraderie that he hoped to have together. a "sorry, aniki."

kaigaku's appearance in canon is less of the role of a character, but as a statement. hes a walking tragedy. he pushes away everything that makes life What It Is in favor of this image of Strength, which is exactly why he becomes-- at first glance-- a caricature. he stops being a person and starts being a Thing. zen tries to keep him in mind as a Person (despite it all) but when he ultimately gives up hope is when the encounter ends. and when kai's role ends as well.

the only thing i still wonder is... does he regret it? in the very depths of his mind, behind all that mess he puts up, after throwing everything away... did he regret it? twice, he was shown care and kindness, and twice he betrayed them. does he know? does he regret it? does he have the capacity to? or has he simply committed so hard to the role he was given-- to the role he put himself in-- that he simply cannot fathom a world in which he was the problem? could it have been different?

put simply... what the fuck is wrong with him?

. anyway, heres a bunch of posts that remind me of him.

||. an assortment of thoughts + headcanons concerning thor + previous relationships / his mentality surrounding ... being that one Resident Super Hot Guy :tm:

(none of these are fully fleshed out into words past these excerpts from my chats w a pal on discord... mostly, I just want to put them on the blog for later reckoning)

a. He was originally set to be betrothed to Lady Sif, though this was never really enforced or official so much as it was implied for as long as they've known each other. He'd have actually happily gone through with this if he hadn't met Jane??? but that's obvsly not what happened. He loves Jane and he would never choose another, ever.

b. Thor at no point ever expected he'd meet someone he'd fall in love with and trust with his heart, and he also sort of just… resigned himself to the fact that he won't marry for love, and that he WILL need to sire an heir whether he wants to or not (but he's super family coded so ofc he'd want kids of his own. It'd just suck for him a lot if it wasn't with someone he loves. he'd not blame the children for that, though.) / (more on that HERE)

c. Thor wasn't exactly a man-hoe or anything, but he is NOT a virgin in the slightest and lost that long before he met Jane, and this is from a variety of short relationships and the occasional fling… but when I say "short" and "occasional" I really do mean that… I don't think he'd get into relationships unless he felt there might be potential, but those never lasted more than a few days. He only would ever need those few to know if there could be something long-lasting.... (and usually they were done while he was out traveling the realms with the rest of his squad), I don't think he'd do flings and one-night-stands often but uh. Sometimes you really need a distraction and alcohol + s*x just kind of happen to go together in Thor's case bc he's an idiot and very careless with himself when it comes to… not being self-destructive. He'd find someone he okay with indulging, get drunk and have relations… but that said I think he'd always make it a point to treat those women nicely before, during, and especially afterwards, and he never left them high and dry bc that'd break his heart more than anything…. sooooo d. He's (unfortunately) used to being people's eye-candy and just kind of expects it at this point. When he's not perfect in the sense of "can do no wrong" or "a hero that always wins and can never be broken, no matter what comes his way", then it's just "he's so handsome and i boy am i having some Sinful Thoughts abt Prince Blondie over there" and thor just sort of …. He doesn't shrug it off, really. I think it actually makes him really uncomfortable. He just chooses to ignore it. Turn the other cheek, if you will, and give a wide berth and a blind eye, because in his mind there's nothing he can do about it =v=;;; To that end, he won't get terribly mad at anyone who does do express anything inappropriate towards him bc he DOES just expect it to happen. He reasons it away and elects to simply stay disengaged unless some lines are crossed. He does goes out of his way to dress modestly. Long sleeves when he can help it, always wearing some kind of shirt or tunic or armor, long pants (on earth, the most casual items of modern-day clothes he'll keep to are joggers. Never ever shorts.), boots, you name it. The most skin he feels comfortable showing are his arms w the sleeveless shirts but that's also partially out of it being easy to wear and great for training purposes. He actually doesn't like training w/o a shirt as an adult bc he has Learned ™️

e. Thor counts his flaws and ESPECIALLY whenever he sees or notices someone Oggling Him he'll go out of his way to remind himself of what they are. He's got a lazy eye that nobody comments on, his hair is darker than it was when he was a child, he's got callouses on his hands from the weapons he uses, when he was a child he had a gap between his front two teeth, he's got very thin scars from the occasional battle (not many, but they're there), - post!ragnarok there's also the addition of his lost right eye and eventual heterochromia … and he does it just to make a point to himself that he's .... not perfect, and if they can't spare the time to notice it then they're probably creatures to be wary of, in the long run

any dreblr blog reccs?? i already follow angela, you, theminecraftbox, and apples but there isnt Enough dreblr on my dash

oh boy i'm not going to cover everyone here because im REALLY BAD at being thorough but do check these people out if u can !!

@dreamsclock sparrow my beloved has SO much awesome writing. if u aren't following him you should do that FOR SURE

@judgehangman is so cool. bubbles is SO cool . follow bubbles right now everything he says abt c!dream drives me up the WALL it's awesome

@overthinkingfandom bluebell has so so so much cool meta one of the smartest people i know !!! definitely check out what she's written literally one of the foundations of dreblr

@lostshideyhole lost my beloved :] rly cool and really awesome, definitely go check em out

@kenjo-arts kenjo has AMAZING art u probably know them already but im not going to not rec kenjo . everyone follow kenjo /threat

@carpedzem nat !!1 for all ur c!dnf needs <3 also really sweet and really cool art :D

@kiuda ki my beloved !! for c!dteam and og 8 and c!dnf Thoughts (tm)

@hiding-in-the-vault vault has AWESOME art and such cool AUs and comics !!!! and also i'm trying to steal her cat shh

@vioarry ry isn't always super active nowadays but their art is literally gorgeous . go show them love :D

@the-final-sif u probably know sif but gotta recommend them as well, one of theeee coolest writers here and always a good source of Brainrot and also life advice. they've also got the dreblrsmp and dreblrsmp discord for a great place to meet and hang out with other dreblr members!

@simplepotatofarmer LOYAL OUR BELOVED !!! for chickenposting and c!rivals thoughts, could not recommend more 

@dreamhot honorary lorehead dreblr member XD lee is more cc focused but also my friend and dreblr kind of kidnapped him so, you know, reccing him here as well

there are lots more people for sure on dreblr, these are just some of the people i know well :] (hi frens!) but yeah -- hang out, lurk a bit, talk to people, and i'm sure you'll have a great time here.

how would u describe evan hansens whole like. Deal. any character analysis for him? i love the way u write him

firstly: thank u!! ;_;<3 i feel as if my current stuff up on ao3 doesn't 1000% reflect how i Would write him now or maybe i just hate my old writing who knows 😭 but regardless it's for the most part up to par w/ how i feel abt heem....

so what i think his deal is is that he's an unintentionally sorta selfish kid riddled with severe self-loathing and mental illness and a desire to be wanted for Something despite the fact that He doesn't believe there is Something there for him to be Wanted for. and the selfish part mainly being in how he is so In His Own Head and kinda chooses to accept that he's a failure and that no one likes him and he has nothing no one alone when that isn't / doesn't have to be the case. like.... thinking he's the main character but in the inverse/wrong way if that makes sense some sort of inferiority complex 😔 i also believe he intrinsically can be kind but i don't think he's Nice, just overtly polite and therefore sorta Appearing as nice

when i was a teenager and just starting to write fic for the first time i would write evan kinda like... purposely a bit meaner than one might fkjgsndf at the time out of spite because it annoyed me so much seeing a lot of people in the majority of fanon spaces depict him as an uwu smol anxiety boy... however, looking back on it i Do think i was onto something for Different reasons 😭 mostly being that 1. i tend to lean a bit towards the arena stage characterization of him, which was objectively a bit more harsh and a bit more rude and 2. in most of the contexts i had written him in, it was w jared specifically in which case i do think he would more or less abandon most of his Need to Be Nice / Polite / Unoffensive because depending on the context 1. he's accepted the fact that 'jared doesn't like him' and therefore doesn't try as hard to give off a good image or pretend to be something he isn't because he doesn't really see a point and thinks jared is just Always gonna be a dick to him / think of him as a 'family friend' (which i'd like to believe he knows is bullshit regardless) or 2. he Does recognize jared as a friend and for the same reasons feels comfortable enough to not put up a front. maybe a mixture of both ! again it sorta depends on the context

his adamance (i'm not sure if that's a word) to the idea that he's such a loser who can't get better no matter what i think makes it much harder for both himself and others to like Be Close to him but yet he wants it so bad and simply doesn't realize he is inadvertently part of the problem. there isnt specifically any One Way he wants to be, he just doesnt want to Be Him... because to him it's clearly wrong and not right and why nobody sees him and why he feels alone etc etc etc

but all that to say -- that's how i personally try to write him when i do jsdkfnsdf obviously that's not The Right Way[tm] or how i expect everyone to see his characterization (and it probably doesn't encompass like even all of My thoughts either i'm just rambling a bit as i procrastinate further on a paper) but! hopefully that answers ur question

In honor of the end of the year (and mostly just cuz I want to) here are some of my favorite builds I’ve done! (And some explanations abt them)

I’ll put a cut so it’s not super annoying to scroll past! :D

Starting off with the build I’m currently working on, the ruined fortress and the tree!

I started the fortress because I wanted a bigger structure in a similar style of the jungle temple. I wanted it to be an impressive build near the jungle temple to imply that it was both, mad at the same time, and has a similar importance as the original temple to those who previously resided in the jungle!

While the fortress had a lot of planning and forethought go into it, I built the tree kinda on a whim. I had wanted to build a Christmas tree in my base for the holidays and had almost forgotten to. I then mentioned to my sisters that I wanted to build a tree, and they both really liked the idea of a huge tree that had grown into the fortress and caused big cracks in the walls. Once it was mentioned I fell in love with the idea. I think it only took about 6 hours total (including resource gathering) and while I’m much more proud of the lower branch then I am the upper two, I still enjoyed the process of building it, and I think it’s fairly reflective of my skills

Next up we have the cave tm (along with the entrance to it)

This build was my passion project. Years of turning caves into homes, living in the sides of mountains, and having secret underground bases under my house led up to this.

There were a handful of lore reasons for why my character had a secret kingdom underground, but they all kinda summed up to he thought it would be safer.

To me this base represents everything I love about Minecraft.

The smelters, and snow farm show the chaos of a large scale, and how little things like that may be an eyesore for a while, but can save you a lot of time in the long run.

The head wall represents how meaningful a bit can be to a player. The wall started as a bit, but quickly became something I couldn’t bring myself to tear down, and eventually got incorporated into my characters lore.

Mushroom and Floyd (the giant moths) simply represent the pets you have and how many players wish to take good care of them and make them happy. I made them stables, but I never ended up putting them in there because I didn’t want them to be caged, I wanted them to have the freedom to roam.

Everything else represents the story. While there are specific details you can’t pick up from just these images, there’s still a lot that just a build can tell you!

The lack of a stairway to the bedroom main part of the build tells you the people who live there can either fly, or have another way to get around

The openness shows that this is either a trusting community, or maybe just one person.

The dining/meeting room implies that other people are there or at least frequently visit

The bedroom can tell you some about the character, the main thing is says is that he was important to this build and community

I never got to finish this build while the server was live, but I have the world download and I’ve been slowly finishing it there.