#but anyways so much happened that i will pretend didnt | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

voguewoozi · 11 months

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can't believe people are still out here accusing real ass people of queerbaiting. at this point just admit you like forcing people to come out before they're ready because that's what the result of this continues to be. coming out to anyone isn't an obligation for any queer person and people shouldn't have to alter their behavior or personality or presentation just because you personally think they're cishet. that is literally your own personal problem to work on. keep it to yourself

#anyway i can't believe i actually saw - in my pride month - someone accusing onlyoneof of queerbaiting #and using gayness for 'clout' like. 1) if any of them actually came out it would probably end their careers. casually #like why do kpop fans constantly forget that queerness isnt a globally accepted thing #2) the fact that they even do these gay storylines in their mvs is insane to me and they already got so much hate for it #like literally what clout are you talking about. this was honestly a risky thing for them to do #and the only reason it paid off at all is bc they have a pretty big supportive international fan base #but otherwise libido literally could've been the end of it for all of them #3) despite getting straight-up hate instead of pretending like it didnt happen and trying to just move on they doubled down #like idk how ooo of all groups is getting ridiculed by gay people like you are sooo online like #meet a gay person from a different cultural background than yours im begging you #you can't say that gay people have to come out without compromising our autonomy #you literally sound like a homophobe forcing us to be categorized and this is why this mindset is not fucking safe #im talking again

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neolxzr · 24 days

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Literally a genuine question no ill intent

What do you like about Aira? As much as people are absolutely adamant Akira is projecting (I really don't think he is (I'm not saying Akira is innocent) I just think he's trying to address the prejudiced thoughts the average Japanese person will have on the Ainu) Aira's weird comments and behaviour to Hiiro have been there since day one. And I also think Aira being the one who says all this is because he's supposed to reflect the fans and the average Japanese fan probably isn't that educated on the Ainu + there can be a good few racist enstars fans...

I'm not trying to sound heated about this I'm just coming from a genuine place, what appeal is there in Aira?

Also, as much as the Aira fans are talking about blaming Akira, I feel like there should absolutely be a focus on Hiiro right now considering that comment was... yknow said to him. I just think we should actually be talking about the Amagis considering that comment was intended to discuss the Amagis and their culture and the discrimination they go through.

i had someone ask me a similar question once but not in the context of all thats happening currently so you can read that here if youre inclined

buuuut what made me like aira so much in the first place was honestly that his concept as a character is really funny. i made a post a long while back that went into the funny meta jokes that you could make using aira as a character before i really knew much about enstars at all. having a character in your idol series that loves idols and canonically reads fanfic about them is just a funny concept in general. and as i continued to read more he continued to be funny and annoying and endearing (his little mini interaction with midori comes to mind immediately. there is something wrong with him)

also i tend to gravitate towards characters that give me like. little sibling energy. i love having a favorite little guy to dote on

but afterwards what really drew me to him was the main story!! thermometry specifically comes to mind (ouuugh,,,,). his feature scout stories are also great and so is feather touch! i wont like. go into detail really cause my blog is covered in me talking about aira already

his dynamic with hiiro is one of my favorites too, especially in mainstory. their dynamic isnt JUST aira says shitty things to hiiro and thats it. their relationship develops really far to the point where aira admits that he needs hiiro as much as hiiro needs him. they're young and inexperienced and kind of codependent as they're trying to keep themselves from going under in a sort of cutthroat industry. i think thats really neat. their relationship is really sweet to me and aira is a great tsundere type of character. he regularly is shown to actually like hiiro a lot as mean as he can be to him sometimes i.e. here. and you know the whole holding hands thing (which they also fucked up in the climax story but Whatever)

theres also this. which i think about regularly. the hiiai shipping fuel is vast

and additionally i think aira has some really great relationships with other characters too, alkaloid especially. feather touch develops his relationship with tatsumi a lot and its one of my favorite aira moments. i couldnt find my screenshots for this one but basically aira gives tatsumi his unlocked phone (something VERY important to aira since hes a little screenager) and it shows tatsumi just how much aira trusts him and he realizes how important aira is as a friend to him. being someone with a history like him aira's friendship is sort of new to him and it helps them both grow

he loves his friends so so much and he’s had a positive impact on all of alkaloid. he is its heart after all

but in any case i'm not going to like, defend myself for liking aira. i am aware that the shitty stuff has been there from the start but i've said something similar in the past that was like. aira isn't real and he cannot take accountability for what he says. he's a character written by real people who doesn't have any control over how he acts. so i guess that's why when i think the writers write something i dont think he would do or say in my own personal aira opinion i can sort of brush it off as just bad writing.

and not in the sense that i dont recognize that enstars sucks, because it does. enstars can be terribly racist sometimes and not just when concerning aira, and thats important to talk about (i.e. the orient cards, the king of thieves cards, etc). but at the end of the day the most important thing to recognize is the people and company behind the game as well as the real people who play the game and are affected by it. and not like, the specific characters in the game. cause they didn't actually do anything or feel anything you know

#cryn answers #anon #enstars #media analysis #im a miraculous ladybug fan im used to pretending that the thing i like is better than it actually is lmfao #was including sources for what im saying too much??#anyway i didnt even touch on airas own experiences with racial discrimination #i dont think its written perfectly so thats why i didnt talk about it but its an important aspect of his character too #and an important part in his place in alkaloid #also i hope i dont come off as rude or upset in this anon #i appreciate you being respectful #but also im a little tired of talking about this ill admit it #i enjoyed rambling about aira again im just like :( that its cause of all the discourse and whatever happening right now #blegh #i think its kind of like. i mean if you only hear little tidbits of what a character is like through twitter screenshots #youre not gonna have a full picture #and i think thats how it is for a lot of enstarries with aira #and thats not a jab at anyone i dont know jackshit about like. mama or undead or fine or akatsuki. and thats fine #theres too many characters for me to know everything about everyone #but with aira specifically his only character trait to the people who dont produce alkaloid is 'the racist one'#and that sucks #but anyways. thats all i have in me for now

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vse-kar-vem · 3 months

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weekly breakdown post 😁 none of you hate me right !

#feeling a bit down ☹️ idk i just feel like #am i not social enough am i just annoying ☹️ i dont post a lot so idk what people follow me for but if i post too much am i being annoying ?#oueagh #vee rambles #like i know everyone has their own niches whatever but i don't know how you just establish connections with people so easily 💔💔#am i brushjng people off without knowing ???? am i just prickly??????#also as a conversationalist i know i dont have much to offer ☹️☹️ im not very funny or capable of very clever adult insights #so really im just kinda there 😞 and like i HAVE real life friends i HAVE a social circle theres no need to base my fulfilment socially on #online interactions 😭#idk maybe its because its harder or its something i feel i cant get that makes it such like a thing that bothers me #like 7 times out of 10 if im sadposting because of that #and its really embarrassing to say that the reason all these like moments of insecurity happen is because my mutuals. have friends #NOTHING AGAINST ANYONE OBVS THIS IS 100% A ME PROBLEM AND NOT EVERY INTERACTION SENDS ME INTO A TAILSPIN ITS JUST SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS #i thjnk it says something about me idk i dont like to think of myself as very jealous but i am i just dont like dwelling on it #trying to figure out if what makes me upset is other people not liking me or my own personal inadequacies #anyways if anyones reading this pretend they didnt i will be over this tomorrow i just #ugh 🥹🥹🥹#i wish i could wake up funnier #or smarter #maybe better at art #🙏 god bless #IVE FIGURED IT OUT #being in such a tight knit fandom reminds me of being in 8th grade again 🥹 not to tragic backstory everyone but like i had no friends #i think it kind of dredges up that kinda loneliness and insecurity in me #wow i should be a psychologist #anyways i still love fandom im not gonna stop it just. sigh. gets to me sometimes

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attaboy-art · 2 years

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day 07: legacy

[Image ID: A darkly colored digital painting done with oil brushes of Alfendi Layton, from Layton Brothers Mystery Room, sitting at his desk in his office at dawn, as seen from the back corner of the room. He is sitting cross-legged with a cup of tea in his hands and he is blankly staring forwards. Behind him is a large window with the blinds half-down showing a grey dawn sky with mutliple buildings and Big Ben in within view. The same wall the window is on also has shelves, newspaper clippings, and a framed letter of apology addressed to Alfendi. In front of him is a messy desk with a lamp, a rotary phone, and a typewriter sitting on top, dimly shining in the light. /.End ID.]

#lb;mrweek #i know im late im sorry im so sorry #i spent tonight and last night looking for my cat up in the park for a couple of hours so i havent had much time to paint #but. I really didnt wanna miss the last day. So #fun fact i started seeing bugs on my ipad while drawing this #anyways. ANYWAYS its time for me to Explain My Reasoning #originally i had a ton of different sketches right. i couldnt choose which one i wanted to do for this prompt #one was of the layton fam greeting al post-game. one was a polaroid of lucy and al posing next to the letter of apology #and the last one was gonna be an abstract-ish portrait of al #but none of them were working with me so i decided. Actually. What do /I/ Think #basically. u know me u know im always on my poor little alfendi shit.#and i was like. well. post-game #post-game hes probably still reeling from everything that happened. Fendi that is but also Al #and hes probably just. like. Holy fuck. Holy shit man #after 4 long lonely years he's finally gotten his name cleared and has gotten an apology from the Nebulous Yard #but. its not like he can go back. Its not like hes going to pretend that none of those years ever happened #he cant forget that ostracization. the alienation. the demonization. The Izations #the wounds of being left behind cannot heal just yet. and thats okay #and its just. What really is al's legacy. He doesnt fight a big robot or save the world. He fought trauma. He fought suppression. And he won #and you KNOOOWWWW my babygirl is a workaholic. you know he stays at the office because its better than being surrounded by reminders at home #AND. LASTY.... dawn is a recurring motif in the laytonverse. dawn symbolizes the end. it symbolizes new beginnings and rebirth yadda yadda #lastly* good lord #so i reallt wanted to capture that feelinf of like. Pulling an all nighter when youre in a fucked up area of your life #and just looking at the grey skies above and thinking sunrise was supposed to be more worthwhile than this #hope u all enjoy. im going to hide my ipad and stylus in a safe for the next week #art #professor layton #lbmr #layton brothers mystery room #alfendi layton

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butchvamp · 1 year

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really disliking this new corporate strategy of using trans people as marketing (hersheys and now bud light(?????)) where these massive billion dollar brands just expose trans women to the most vile harassment possible while they get to profit off their image and pretend to be progressive. like wow cool you put trans women on your chocolate bar and your beer cans but are you like, doing anything for them and the wider community or are you just parading them around...lol. also it really frustrates me that people will eat this shit up. brands targeting the lgbt community as a marketing demographic is not a good thing, actually. it should piss you off that target sells tshirts with the word queer on it. it should piss you off that hersheys "we use child slave labor" chocolate is trying to target you specifically with their advertisements

#obviously im sure fae and dylan are being paid and i dont think theyre bad for taking the endorsements #but are these companies doing anything else to like. protect them.#it feels so gross and exploitative lol #dylan has already been getting so much online harassment #and after that hersheys womens day ad fae had to like scrub some of her online presence to avoid being doxxed #and for weeks afterwards on twitter people were just being so horrible about her #and hersheys specifically never came back out in support of her #they made a very vague wish washy statement abt ‘inclusion’ where they didnt even mention her or trans women at all lol #like again im sure both women took the endorsement with the knowledge that this would happen #but i do think. as being 'inclusive' has become a clear marketing strategy then these companies #need to be offering more than just money for parading marginalized people around #especially with the. current Political and Social climate. lmfao #idk the hersheys thing really pissed me off earlier this year especially when the company completely failed to really support her #i dont know whats going on behind the scenes but they should have done something publicly anyways #tfw you want to pretend to be progressive but also dont want to completely alienate your bigot customers... lol!#also they only donated 30k for those ads which is less than pennies compared to the 4.4billion they made last year

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youarealwaysenough · 5 months

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I hate how if I don't explain a situation with my parents perfectly I just sound like a brat and not someone trying to set boundaries for abuse

#so when i was growing up my mom would ALWAYS get me clothes she knew i didnt like for gifts #that way she could yell at me for not “being excited enough” when i opened them #and then yell at me again later for not ever wearing what she bought me #and i was trying to explain to someone how one time i just told her to stop buying me clothes and it was fine not to get me any gifts at al #and how much she blew up at me for that and then pretended the conversation never happened #but i didnt give all the backstory detail and now im pretty sure they think i was an ungrateful bratty kid too :(#anyway yeah thats just one small part of why i dont do holidays with my parents any more

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uchimakis · 1 year

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been seeing so much unnecessary bi mike slander on my dash recently. sometimes selfcare is blocking 15 people and going into the bi mike tag for an hour <3

#while we're at it im also sick of those condescending 'bi mike is valid too even if its incorrect <3' posts #istg sometimes people in this fandom forget that literally nothing is confirmed and everything is up to personal interpretation #why do some gay mike truthers get so pressed about the possibility mike could be bi huh #ive never seen the same level of aggression from any bi mike truthers about gay mike hcs . ive only seen it from gay mike truthers #obv a lot of gay mikers are great and chill and know how to be normal but there are some people out there who seem to be basing their #entire byler experience on being as biphobic as possible lmao #in the most smug condescending way!! its so annoying!! ive seen people genuinely claim gay mike is Confirmed Canon #and bi mike is just a silly little incorrect hc for people who arent as invested and arent watching the show correctly #ive NEVER had this much trouble w biphobia in fandom before. in all my 12 years of being in fandom #and sorry but im sick of pretending its not happening. anyone who is rolling their eyes at this or thinks im being melodramatic:#its not even about mikes sexuality its about how the discourse is really revealing some peoples true colours wrt general biphobia #idc if mike is gay but i DO care if you have a problem with other people hcing an unconfirmed chara as bi #anyone who doesnt think theres any biphobia in byler fandom needs to unfollow me actually.#ive seen too many horrendously awful takes and blatant misunderstandings of the concept of bisexuality #for people to say its not happening. bc it is .#anyway didnt mean for this to turn into a vent post but ive been feeling this for a while #might delete this later and write a proper vent post thats more coherent at some point but for now im too tired for that #so have incoherent venting ig #me.txt

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our-lady-of-mcr · 14 days

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#also god bless my friend who pointed out that im moving up and im going to be in a salon soon and will actually be doing something good with #my life vs the friend who did me this way pretending shes still in high school that freaks out and loses all her friends every 6 months #i wish it didnt bother me. and i know in 2 months im going to have brushed it off and move on like i always do when bad shit happens #but for the wound being fresh this shit just fucking sucks i hate it i hate it i hate it #i made a very very very vague post on reddit just asking for advice #and the more popular reply was someone more on my side who basically said i should tell her to go fuck herself pretty much #and the second one was someone who v obviously did not actually read the post who said it was all fluff and basically defended her even #when in my post i am saying i defended myself while still listening to the shit she says #and i fucking hate reddit bc people are so.....quick to be hateful and judge #and i knew to expect people being hateful but god DAMN like you yourself are basically saying theres not enough info (yes there was) and you #still are quicker to assume im in the wrong #meanwhile everyone who knows her is like bitch we told you to not forgive her last time and now look where you are #and i am not a perfect person i have flaws the same way everyone else does. literally everyone has said and done shit they regret #and i have fucked her over before because she lost her fucking mind on a campus manager and an educator and she told me to find my own ride #home because i didnt defend her losing her shit and screaming at everyone and ended up having to write an incident report (so did the other #girls who watched it happen so nOT just me) anyways now she uses that as an excuse for treating me like fucking trash because she finally #found out about the god damn incident report which made it so now anyone can say i said anything and she just believes it #its such a fucking joke to me because like ????? girl if we were in opposite positions you would have filled out the fuckin report too #granted it was a handwritten letter and not a report but it was basically the exact same thing as an incident report #my bad that a year ago i wrote a letter saying i was scared you know where i live and that youre mentally unstable. funny how a year later i #feel the same way all over again! except i dont because im not scared of her anymore shes a fucking theater kid who needs to get a grip #i cant wait to look at my self tag again in 2 years and be like DAMN REMEMBER WHEN THAT HAPPENED #every single person who knows her that isnt friends with her (i am basically refusing to text her friends bc i dont even want to know)#keeps telling me i didnt do anything wrong and ive given her too many chances and she fucks me each time #i just wish she would go get help bro there is something so wrong with her #self

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snekdood · 1 year

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whats really unfortunate is im p sure my sister was the catalyst for why people in my town like to just gossip and make shit up about me without asking. like it started with her talking to my middle school bully about me behind my back, probably telling her all kinds of bullshit bc my sisters a compulsive liar, then that bully followed me to highschool for a brief moment before leaving, spreading all the bullshit that started at my old school to my new one before dipping. and then people started making shit up about me at highschool. i was so excited to finally get a fresh start in highschool only for that bitter cunt to come along and sour shit for no fucking reason bc idk she has a weird hate boner for me, who can say (maybe it was some bullshit my sister said 🙃 i wonder!). and since my high school was way bigger and she had a wider range of people, word just spread through the grapevine of whatever dumb shitppl were coming up with mixed with actual events that happened that painted me in an embarrassing light or whatever. and im like. kinda sure that the only reason my ex decided to turn on me so hard, shaming me in every capacity down to just who i am inherently was bc alllll of those stupid rumors came to them after we broke up. like. yall just wont let me escape this NOR EVEN GIVE ME THE FUCKING CHANCE TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT IN ANY CAPACITY. why in the FUCK are you SO FUCKING INVESTED IN TRYING TO FUCK UP MY LIFE?? WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING DAMAGE??? LEAVE ME THE FRESH FUCK ALONE!!! IF YOU’RE STILL TALKING ABOUT ME AFTER HIGHSCHOOL WITH PEOPLE WE WENT TO HIGHSCHOOL WITH YOU LITERALLY HAVENT MATURED FOR SHIT AND I FEEL BAD FOR YOU ABOUT THAT. LIKE HOLY FUCK. yall are dense self absorbed pieces of shits who think you’re so above whoever you decide to throw under the bus but you’re literally the same staple mediocre mean girl from every other fucking school anyone has ever fucking seen. if you’re not even going to give me a list of my sins. if none of you assholes are even going to approach me to ASK ME DIRECTLY IF WHAT SOMETHING SOMEONE SAID WAS TRUE. INSTEAD OF HANGING OUT WITH ME TO SECRETLY GET INFO AND HOPEFULLY GET INFO ABOUT THAT OUT OF ME. IF YOU’RE NOT EVEN GOING TO WELCOME ME INTO THE GOSSIP CIRCLE SO I CAN TELL ALL OF YOU **AT THE VERY LEAST** MY PERSPECTIVE, OH, LETS FORGET BELIEVING VICTIMS WHEN IT COMES TO ME, REMEMBER, IM PROBABLY LYING ABOUT EVERYTHING MY FAMILY OR ANYONE WHOS ABUSED ME HAS EVER DONE RIGHT LOL 🤪 KILL YOURSELF. You literally dont deserve anything you could ever benefit from being my friend. i hope all of you selfish drama-vampires, who apparently cant survive without gossiping like its fucking air, rot

#anyways yall remind me of a catholic cult #anyways idc what happens to anyone in my old town either #yall basically exiled me so now i just kinda dont give a single fuck or shit what happens to any of you c: !#hows it feel bitch?#dont think imma do anything for any of yall if you ever need me to. dont think ill be there. lord knows none of you were.#lord knows none of you cared #what. whats your justification for treating me this way?#tell me in detail. exactly. why?#because i grew up rich? well so did my sister and brother and yall had no issues with them #because i was blonde or something? because i was confident? because i didnt know how to socialize in an Un Weird Way?#because i liked playing pretend? because i liked drawing? because i watched tv shows and liked making ocs and drawing tv show characters #fucking or whatever?#is this really my greatest sins?#bc like before highschool? yall dont really have shit to hang on for why you treated me the way you did. like AT ALL.#granted bc of ptsd i cant remember much of my childhood anyways but i knew i didnt hate anyone ever #otherwise why would i keep letting my middle school bully in to interact with me and hoping we could mend things and become friends?#only for her each time to lie and go make fun of me with other people in the class?#and when it came to highschool. the worst thing about me was that i thought it was ok for me to say slurs it 100% wasnt ok for me to say #bc i was under the impression that 'the world was peaceful now and these thingsd didnt have impact and ppl could start saying whatever and #it wouldnt hurt people anymore and the world is healing and its just a word now and my brothers friends seem ok when he does it so?'#yeah ik ik i was optimistic. maybe my middle school couldve done a better job at emphasizing that *those were still issues people faced #and that the world isnt healed and perfect and that it doesnt always get better' bc one of my teachers 100% directed me to the-#it gets better website #regardless. that along with group roasting sessions essentially with my brother and his friends where we made fun of the way we all looked #kinda made me think saying some things were okay that weren't. not an excuse but i wasnt a fucking bigot and ill die on that hill :)!#and sure i got into new age conspiracy theories but *i* didn #'t know it was anti semitici in nature. ive mentioned before that any websited i read never mentioned jewish people EVER #i just liked the idea of aliens being real as it was an idea i never let myself explore before. i was more into demons initially sdhdhgs.#aliens and the new version of spirituality which essentially promised me everything as long as i believe strong enough lol #regardless- im pretty sure other ppl at the time didnt know it was bad either. or if they did. then they should take issue with my ex nick

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malkaviian · 1 year

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now that i've developed maverick a bit more, i have to think about how he was before the whole incident with zachary.

#as i said his brain did a complete change to deal with everything that happened; including killing zachary #after having his dead body in his house for hours he started to connect the dots of the situation he was in for months. he couldnt believe #it truly was zachary; the cheerful; perfect student everyone loved; who stalked him to the point he was terrified for his life #and that made him stop going to college because he was too scared to leave his house. but at the same he was scared to stay in his house #since his stalker knew where he lived; and they could just attack at any moment. man he wasnt even that close to zachary #he doesnt understand what happened for him to get that obsessed over him. but it was over. he killed him after he tried to murder him first #so that was it. but before he started to freak out over the possibility of going to prison for murdering someone #he just... changed. he turned into a totally different person; with his old personality completely dying and... well #replacing it with no actual personality besides someone obsessive who adapts to whatever his current beloved likes the most #and likes to pretend 'innocence' so his beloved would be quick to trust him. he wouldnt hurt a fly :)#and while the whole stalking was happening he turned into an anxious mess who would break down very easily and was generally very fragile #so... before that; i think he was probably trusting of people; maybe a bit too trusting. he was very shy #which made it difficult to make friends; but tried his best to be social and do it anyway. so it turned into trusting people easily #and anything slightly weird was assumed to be his mind playing tricks... which is why probably he didnt notice sooner who his stalker was #i mean; zachary was great at pretending; but he did started to get more 'protective' when the stalking started; when they werent that close #but it must have been because he was worried like the rest of their classmates! and after all he was the definition of a perfect person.#it would make sense for someone as good and caring as him to feel the need to protect a sort-of-friend; right? nothing bad; really.#he would also try his best to help someone if they were in that horrible situation anyway #i imagine he also had a slightly low self-esteem; but not to the worrying point. mostly because of his own shyness #alongside friendships; he didnt really that much luck with love in the past. but tried to stay positive and think he would find someone #and yeah; he was someone who tried to see the bright side of things; in a healthy amount. but that didnt really worked while being stalked #if someone left him gifts on his desk in college; that would be one thing. he may as well thought it was sweet in a 'secret admirer' way #but this person literally started to leave gifts on the door of his fucking house; when he never told anyone on college where he lived #and he was already out of touch with the few friends he had in high school + they were no longer his friends. so yeah #even he couldnt ignore that wasnt good or sweet; it was a real problem regardless of how much he couldve liked the gifts in another context #let alone when the goddamn love letters started. he could receive multiple in a day; he even got 15 in a single day #it couldnt be justified at all; and it made his already growing fear even worse.#so basically: he was a person who tried his best to do better; but someone had to ruin it. thanks; zachary /j #oc talk

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delcakoo · 1 year

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OMGGG I CANT STOP THINKING ABT JOCK NIKI AND SHY TUTORRRR I NEED MOREEEEEE

WHAT HAPPENED AFTER THE MAKE OUT SESS IN THE LIBRARY I NEED ALL THE DEETS 😍😍

part 1 lol

PAIRING ! jock!niki x tutor!gn!reader

WC ! 800ish

WARNINGS ! smooching and u and riki being so so cute

a/n: I DIDNT THINK ITD BE THAT EFFECTIVE ON ANYONE HELLO?? IM HONORED OK ENJOY !!

niki pulls away from the kiss, chuckling proudly at the string of saliva connecting your bottom lip to his. his right hand still rests on the back of your neck while the other grips the library table firmly. “and that one?” he inquires again.

you gulp, nervously glancing around the surrounding shelves of books. “it.. it was good..” as you mumble pathetically, you suddenly remember what you’re supposed to be doing. “..will you at least tell me what’s below the catella?”

he bursts into a disbelieving giggle, eyes crinkling into half-moons at your words. “all that and you’re still focused on tutoring me?” when you send him a warning glare (which he wasn’t phased by in the slightest), niki smirks. “the tibia.”

you nod, affirming that he was correct. “good job.” before he can do anything else, you swiftly stand to your feet and throw your belongings into your bag quicker and messier than you’ve ever done in your life. what made it all worse was that along with the piercing, hungry stare you could feel on your back the whole time, the taste of the boy was still fully on your tongue and lips.

“so thats it? gonna pack up and pretend nothing happened like last time?” he spits. you thought the jock was just playing with you — finding ways to make his ‘tutor sessions’ a bit more exciting — but you swear a hint of genuine frustration could be heard coating his sharp accusations.

you grit your teeth either way. “niki, this session ended ten minutes ago.”

tonguing the side of his cheek, he stands up himself while running strong fingers through his bangs. “and? fuck the session, i only care about you anyway.” you freeze. niki seems equally shocked, only realising his confession after another moment of silence passes.

“i..”

“look, i know your standards are too high for some fuck up like me so just- just pretend i didn’t say shit.”

it takes you a few blinks to process niki walking away, textbook and pencilcase tucked securely under his arm for you to hurrily chase after him. you pull the back of his navy hoodie with vigor, not taking another moment of hesitation before smashing your lips on his as soon as he stumbles around to face you.

he was the one to pull away first (which, for the record, had never happened before). “wh.. what- y/n?” niki questioningly stares down at you, a shimmer of hope reflecting in his pupils.

“i care about you too. i mean i- i think i like you, too,” you rush out.

his expression morphs instantly, a small beginning of a smirk forming as he leans against the nearest bookshelf. “i never said i liked you, did i?”

you frown, sending him a harsh glare. “niki.”

“sorry.” it was clear the male didn’t have much experience with such conversation judging by the way he scratched the nape of his neck, glancing off into space shyly. “so like.. i have a basketball game friday..”

“mhm..” you try not to laugh at his sudden change of attitude, edging him on with a nod.

“and if you wanna like- i don’t know, wearmyjerseyandcomewatchme or something.. i wouldn’t mind. and- and we can go eat somewhere after if you’re okay with taking the bus.”

you never imagined nishimura riki could be so cute, but somehow it brings butterflies to your stomach. “yeah, sure. that sounds good, text me the details?”

his eyes widen, mouth stammering as he takes in your response. "oh, uh- yeah, yeah i will.” pushing off the wall, niki only begins to walk away before he's quickly swivelling towards you again, rushing to plant a kiss on your forehead before taking off with promises of a text.

you nearly fail to miss the giddy smile on his face as he exits the library — not that you were any better with cheeks as red as your swollen lips.

one chance niki !!!!!!! ++ reblogs n comments r always appreciated if u enjoyed n want more pspsps

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spigobath · 5 months

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thinking about jay ferin and guilt. thinking about how the black sea to her is impossible decisions one after the other. thinking about how she blames herself for every bad thing that has happened. people keep saying like "oh imagine gill's horror of walking in on his best friend being killed", but like imagine the sinking feeling of dread in jay as she realized that she had done this, inadvertently. that because she didnt want to lose a leg to feed the queen, chip lost his heart.

and then she goes and fucks up her leg anyways, and it all seems so pointless, and death is not such a distant thing anymore. but they get through it. and she hides her pain away because it doesnt amount to what anyone else is feeling at the moment. because she can surely suffer a little but as retribution. and she doesnt tell anyone because of this guilt. (if i remember correctly, grizzly described her injury as this: it stretched to right under her ribs, afflicting the whole side of her body. but the worst of it was seemingly only up to her knee, where the spread was inching up. i know he described her leg as mangled, and i know he said that she could see the bone of her own knee)

and then after they leave, and she still hasnt done anything, they go to the navy stronghold. and we all know how that went. and jay once again blames herself for the whole thing. and jay probably feels so guilty that gillion just lost a pivotal aspect of himself with the tree conversation, and that he was skinned alive and basically died twice, and she probably feels so stupid for letting them split up at all.

and then i think about previous things. i think about how she shot gillion in the BLOCK, how she lied to them for half of their journey. i think about how much she loved them, and how bad she felt, and how guilty she was. to her, she is the worst of them all, someone pretending to be someone else. navy pretending to be pirate, friend pretending to be friend. and then i think of when they had to fight kira, how she misses everyone she used to have in her life, and how guilty she was over how she left. how she will never get over all that she has lost and all that she has to lose.

this isnt coherent at all. but jay ferin is a character built on guilt and retribution. she is vengeful in the way she revolts against authority without thinking, and only minds the consequences afterwards. she is just like the gun she wields, and she is much like the linger of smoke and the sting of recoil.

#jrwiblr #jay ferin #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #jrwi jay #jrwi gillion #gillion tidestrider #jrwi chip #fuck my gay ass life - jay ferin #i love her

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blueskittlesart · 1 year

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can we talk about how rauru is literally like. just zelda’s dad. like in that one scene where zelda looks like she’s gravely contemplating turning into a dragon and then rauru goes “i believe the answer lies in more research and understanding your power!” and she looks at him with such shock and awe. zelda’s adventures in the past are literally like her life but with a better dad. the queen promises her to help her figure out her power but dies before they can figure out a way how to use that power to safely save everyone. zelda desperately wants to help everyone and is clearly feeling the pressure of it all and the king is the one to tell her “hey i understand how hard you’re trying and how much you want to save everyone and we’re thankful for what you’re doing”. rauru actually acknowledges zelda’s dedication and the importance of research and technology, he is kind to her and never blames her for any of the bad things happening. he also never pushes zelda to make sacrifices and is the one sacrificing himself in the end - in botw, all the champions and zelda have to choose to make sacrifices to save the kingdom, but in totk rauru doesn’t ask that of any of the sages, instead recognizing his own responsibility as king and basically dying to save his kingdom. he’s literally zelda’s better dad.

same anon as the one raving about rauru also the differences between how the two kings treat link. they’re both tutorial figures but the way they guide is SO different. pretty much the first thing rhoam does is lie and pretend to be a random old man, being quite annoying as he sends link to do a bunch of challenges for a paraglider. the framing is so fundamentally different, rauru freely offers the information he has to link upfront, he apologises for the body modification, acknowledging link’s potential distress. rhoam basically keeps link on the plateau arbitrarily, presenting giving items and teaching link about things as challenges for link to overcome. rauru on the other hand aids link as best he can, tells him what he needs to do from the beginning (tells him to open the door which is pretty much the last thing he’ll need to do in the tutorial, telling him about the ultimate goal from the beginning), proposes solutions when it doesn’t work out (directs him to the shrines as a way to help him gain the strength he needs, as opposed to making him complete challenges to get a paraglider that in the moment seems like literally arbitrary conditions). rhoam telling link how much responsibility and pressure he has on him all of a sudden and how much he needs to do vs rauru telling link that it was wonderful to meet him and zelda’s accounts of him were all true. like. the framing. the difference in character. the deterioration of knowledge within hyrule falls parallel to the deterioration of its king’s kindness and virtue.

the differences between rauru and roham are crazy to me because one of them was so fundamentally good and one was so fundamentally flawed and yet. neither of them were able to save their kingdom. no matter how good a king of hyrule is, no matter what he gets right or wrong, he is still doomed to die. rhoam tried to sacrifice his daughter to keep hyrule alive. rauru did everything in his power to make sure she DIDNT have to be sacrificed. and in the end the outcome was the same. but the KINGS were not the same, and that difference in framing you mentioned i think is fundamentally a difference in legacy. rhoams legacy is to forever be the king who sacrificed children to save himself and died anyway. rhoam died a loser through and through, a king atop a throne of nothing but failure. i think that’s partially why he appears as an old man at first, because he KNOWS what being the king of hyrule means and he’s EMBARRASSED that his legacy is what it is. but rauru. in complete contrast, rauru was so GOOD. rauru died with his sages and his DAUGHTER alive to see another day. rauru ENSURED they’d live no matter what. he wouldn’t LET them sacrifice themselves for him. rauru put everyone else before himself. he didn’t expect or even tolerate self-sacrifice and yet when the time came he sacrificed HIMSELF selflessly despite knowing that it wouldn’t even WORK. rauru’s legacy is something to be proud of. he’s open to link because he has nothing TO hide. no regrets or stupid decisions. and he is remembered so much more favorably because of it.

#all rhoam had to do was not sacrifice child soldiers but that is apparently too high a bar for him #even in death rauru is like. apologetic to link about having to do all this shit too #which is crazy different from rhoam ‘go save my kid who i abused for years. fuck you no paraglider’ hyrule #LIKE. rauru and sonia are transparently the father and mother zelda never had. and then they both DIE. AGHHHHHH #totk liveblog #totk spoilers

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iisowks · 4 months

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bbg….imagine-teen mommy! reader who works with PM dazai and through a LOT of drama he finds out he’s the father (drama💗) you decide the rest~ or!! Another idea!! Idea no 2; chuuya finds out its dazais kid. ((Smut or no smut idk))

PM! Dazai… and chuuya x Pregnant teen! Reader

Warnings: it can be a trigger for some people, mentions of suicide, mention of alcohol, mention of sex, suggestive but not smut detailed, it ends bad so yeah, and kind of cheating too.

Note: Heyyy so i don’t know what i did so i just did an like PLUS CHUUYA or sum but i guess it’s ok even tho i hated :3, but i really hope you like! and yes i think i’ll do an part two where Y/N finds him when they’re adults!

★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★

you joined the mafia very young but already a teenager, you don't actually like to be there but you had no choice or where to go. When you joined you didn't want to be with anyone and you didn't actually wanted to have friends, but two teenagers around your age did NOT leave you alone, and you enjoyed it after some time! you felt less lonely.

but then things got complicated. After some time, you catched yourself attracted to Dazai, even though you knew he wasn't the best person to be with, and you denied for a long time until one day Dazai was at your door, drunk.

“heyyy Y/N, i missed you!” dazai said with a messy voice… “Dazai, what the fuck? it 's 2 AM!” you said quite angry at him, but you took him in and gave him water, trying to make him sober, “Dazai, you really shouldn't be drinking that much.” you said worried about him, after all you guys were just teenagers. “and what? were all fucked up, it wont change anything! That's why I came here, I want to experience something before I die and you can help me with that, darling.”

you knew what was he talking about even tho your thoughts are saying not to do it because youre a fucking teenager, you wanted to. “Dazai, i don’t think we should-” “shut up.” right after that he kissed you… and you didn't stop him, i mean, who would 🧍‍♀️

Well you guys had sex, and you didn't know how to react at first… when you woke up he was gone, and that confused you, but you still wanted to talk to him.

After some time you guys became very close and sex became something normal for you two, until one day you two argued about something very silly but you were so done with him that you just walked away just like he did!

well you were walking through the city when you had the thought of drinking something, and since you were from mafia, almost no one questioned your age.

Well it was your first time drinking so you didnt knew what to ask for thats when you saw your friend Chuuya, “Chuuya! hi!” you said happy to see someone you could talk to. “oh, Y/N…” Chuuya said quite… normal? “do you mind helping me? i dont know what do drink…” “its your first time drinking alcohol?”

the night passed really fast, it was already like 1 AM and you and Chuuya were definetly drunk, “hey Chuu, can we have sex?” Chuuya frozed “huh? i thought you were with that morron” “well im not dating him!” Chuuya hesitated, but he was too drunk to have filter. “i… i guess then it’s okay?” you kissed him almost immediatly, you needed that because you were still feeling bad because of Dazai… and you know he probably did the same and that fucking hurted you.

well you woke up in your bed but no Chuuya, so you thought ‘oh thank god it was dream haha’ until you saw a note of Chuuya saying he should have stayed until you woked up but he didnt want to make you uncomfortable, in that moment you thought of suicide.

You simply pretended that nothing happened and prayed for Chuuya to do that too. Well you ignored everyone in the mafia for 2 weeks, until one day you just didn't feel well and runned away from mafia because mori would never let you go earlier, well you had your suspicions you were pregnant and you were going to do the test anyway.

When the test was positive you panicked, you were 16 and now pregnant?! you just wanted to die, but now you had to discover who’s the dad, and you don’t think Dazai would be happy with something like this. You were scared, but you thought it was better to let Chuuya know, since he was the last person you had a sexual relation.

You used protection with both. so one of them just didn’t work or something, you couldn’t think about any other reason but now the problem is not even that, is that you were pregnant with one of those man’s baby.

Well, Chuuya’s reaction was kind of… not good, and you understand that since you both were teenagers and definitely not ready to have a baby, but you also told him that could be Dazai, in the end he just accompanied you to do the test to see who is the father of the baby.

Well, now you have to wait, both of you, because Dazai has no clue what is happening and he probably thinks you still hate him. You were almost dying to know who the father was but part of you didn’t want to be Dazai because you don’t know how he would react.

A call, the attendant started to talk… after a time you just asked for her to say who was, when she said, you hung up and started crying immediately.

“Chuuya, thank you for the help, but i have to tranquilize you. You are not the father.” Chuuya was incredibly silent. “Be careful, Y/N.” That's all he said.

You lefted immediately to look for Dazai, you tried all the places you could, he was in none of them.

��Mori, hello.” It was your last chance. “Y/N, can i know why you are here after disappearing for 4 weeks?” “I just wanted to ask you if you know where Dazai is.” “Dazai is no longer a part of the mafia, miss Y/N.” “what?..” “he lefted.”

You ran. You ran the fastest that you could… you hated him, you hated him so much even though he doesn't even know you’re carrying his baby.

I guess until you meet him again.

★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★

#bungou stray dogs #x reader #bsd x reader #dazai osamu #chuuya x reader #light angst #dazai x reader #bsd #iisowks

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thelov3lybookworm · 1 month

Text

You Think I Wanted This (part 4)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Summary: Breakfast was never this tense

•○●⛦●○•

A/n: aight so i didnt know that Alic was supposed to be dead, and that Halden was the living brother, so now please pretend i never mentioned alic and that the brother had always been halden in this series 🥲 i will be going back to change the previous parts and editing alic to halden to prevent any confusions, but im sorry for and confusion now hehe

anyways, enjoy!

Breakfast was always a quiet and quick ordeal in the royal family.

The day after Y/n's wedding, it was also tense.

Her father seemed oblivious as he scraped up his eggs with his fork and chewed, his focus solely on the reports his second in charge had handed him the moment he sat down. He did not pay much mind to anything other than those papers, and Y/n was grateful for it as she drowned in the fury radiating off of her brothers and husband.

Directly opposite her sat Halden, glaring holes into his plate and occasionally sparing Xaden a glance filled with murderous intent.

Cam was no better from where he was stabbing his sausage with his knife as if it had committed a personal crime against him. His shoulders were almost touching his ears from how tensed they were, his jaw clenched as he kept his stare fixed on Xaden, warning in his eyes.

Y/n sighed lowly, looking at Xaden from the corner of her eyes. He looked... constipated, if she put it nicely.

Before she could formulate another thought, her father's chair scraped against the ground, and she shot up, along with her brothers, as was expected.

Xaden though, he had a death wish. He remained seated, even as the king turned to glare at him. It wasn't until Y/n tapped his arm that he followed suit, albeit very slowly.

The king's eyes were glazed in ice, steam practically coming out of his ears at the blatant disrespect, that too in front of so many guards.

"Y/n. Your husband needs to have some lessons in manners for the royal family, doesn't he?"

Y/n bowed her head.

"Yes, father."

"Make sure something like this doesn't happen again."

"Yes, father."

He left then, and Y/n finally let go of the breath she was holding.

"Fucking bastard." Y/n's head snapped up at Cam's use of the words, her jaw hanging open.

Royal children did not curse. That was an unspoken rule in the family.

Cam cursing would have been punishable had their father heard.

Y/n had no time to do anything but watch as Cam rounded the long table, coming face to face with Xaden as he sneered.

"You will learn, Riorson, because if my father loses his temper on my sister, you will be the one to suffer. You hear that?"

Xaden said nothing, and Y/n turned her body so she could jump in if Cam decided Xaden was not worth warnings and words. Halden had the audacity to sit back down and continue eating, amusement shining in his eyes as he witnessed the scene in front of him.

Y/n shot him a look of betrayal, and all he did was shrug.

"Back off, Aaric." Y/n's eyes shot back to the two men, still going at it.

Cam didn't move for a long moment, the tension in the room becoming suffocating.

But then a muscle ticked in Xaden's jaw, and Cam finally stepped away, smirking.

Xaden stalked away, bumping his shoulder into Cam's, who chuckled. Like this was the most amusing thing in the world.

As Y/n remained standing, watching Xaden walk out the doors, Cam took the seat next to Y/n, seemingly unfazed by Y/n's glare.

"Halden, pass me some juice. I need to refresh my energy."

Y/n sighed, settling down onto her chair.

"You two need to calm down. He is pissed as it is. You are not helping."

They seemed to have gone deaf, for they did not respond or even pretend to have heard her.

"Aaric?"

Cam choked on his drink.

"Um, yeah. I got myself a new name so no one would recognise me in the quadrant."

Halden snorted, shaking his head. "And you couldn't find any better name? You do love to copy everything about Alic, don't you?"

"Die."

Y/n rubbed her brows, deciding to leave the two fools that were her brothers to their bickering and to go find Xaden to see if he was in the mood to bring down the castle. She didn't know much about him yet, but if she knew anything about men, it was that they had overinflated, fragile egos. And Xaden's ego was surely hurt by what happened, and it would be better to calm him down before he lost whatever he had in that skull.

She didn't want anymore drama than she already had to handle, and add to that his upset... butt.

No, she was quite fine with how things were already going. She didn't need them becoming worse.

That, and she wasn't as heartless as she pretended to be. She did care about keeping everyone happy, even when she was unwilling to.

So that meant checking up on her ugly husband, even if she just wished for him to return and stew with his dragon.

Y/n wished she had just sat her backside down and listened to her brothers bicker, because the alternative was not really something she wished to have seen.

There, in the hallway leading up to her own chambers, empty of guards, stood Xaden.

And Violet Sorrengail.

Y/n simply blinked, taking in the sight she had unfortunately stumbled upon.

Interesting. That was the only way she could describe the scene.

The two of them were standing next to the two opposite walls, only a few feet between them, though they seemed to wish to erase the distance, with the way Violet was leaning forward, desperation seeping from every pore of her being.

Xaden looked like a huge hand had slapped him onto the wall like a ball of dough, his head resting back, his eyes closed as Violet screamed at him.

"Are you even listening to me Xaden?"

"Violence, please. Don't make it harder than it already is."

"Fine. I'll leave you alone."

Y/n's eyebrows rose.

"Vi-"

"Trouble in paradise?"

Both their heads snapped to Y/n as she strode towards her room from right between them, fixing her tiara.

"No. We were just talking about how we'll manage our schedules because of our bonded dragons."

Y/n hummed, glancing once at Xaden with one brow raised. "Just make sure you discuss about your schedules in private, because being found screaming in the palace hallways is the easiest way to bring yourself in the line of the king's attention. You don't want to be found talking, especially when our marriage is based on your separation."

She turned to give Violet a look, who turned away, holding her head.

Then Y/n continued on, towards her chambers where her academic work was still pending.

That was all that mattered, really. Her studies.

That was the only way she could stop thinking about anything, really. It brought her peace and calm, even if she hadn't wanted to be a healer.

The day was only starting, and she already had to try to drown herself in studies to keep her headache at bay.

How fun.

Fourth Wing Taglist: @byyalady @gardenofrunar

Xaden Taglist: @sidrapotter @anniiittttaa @pirana10 @harrystylesfan2686 @artists-ally @riddlesb1tch @thebeautifulmysteriesoflife @bubybubsters

YTIWT Taglist: @thebeautifulmysteriesoflife @wallacewillow0773638

#xaden x reader #xaden riorson #fourth wing #fourth wing x reader #rebecca yarros #fourth wing headcanons #xaden headcanon #fourth wing fanfic

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stealingpotatoes · 7 months

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Invitation to talk about Sayuri and Nymie?

:D CAN OF WORMS: OPENED!! i'll tell u abt how they got found as Jedi

ok so Sayuri is one of the students that doesn't rlly go home bc there isn't much to go back to. Basically her parents were Rebellion pilots (or one was a pilot the other a mechanic. kinda unsure) but were both killed in action against the Empire abt 3-4ABY ish. obvs the Rebellion couldn't look after a 7-8yo while fighting the Empire

so the remainder of the squad manage to get her back to her parents' home village/ where she was born. so having like Everything change all at once leaves her pretty ?? and gives her some serious trusting-her-environment issues. her coolgirl "i dont care" persona is very much a result of this bc she's worried abt getting too comfy in smthn. (which is at odds w the OTHER issue she got from this event which is "deathly afraid of flying" an issue not helped if Master "traffic laws are just guidelines" Skywalker is piloting. but she tries 2 act like shes fine)

this is gonna get kinda long so im gonna smack some unposted art here and then go into a readmore

anyway fast forwarding to when Sayuri's abt 13 (roughly 9aby) she's visiting her parent's old squadron on a New Republic bc they'd all come visit whenever she could and after the Empire's fall they did a lot more pick her up and fly her to a base to ALL see her. and they're like omg Sayuri you came at the PERFECT time bc this rlly amazing pilot war hero who's also some like. mystical whatever is here!! he's on his way to some magic place we heard. maybe u can meet him!! which sayuri meets w her usual whatever bc she's not that gassed abt war heroes.

very worth noting that the squad's probably all seen her move shit with her mind, but theyre like oh you know how it is with teenage girls. the "nobody knows what a jedi is" + "the empire existed for a decent bit of her childhood" thing has kept anyone from being like yeahh sayuri should like. talk to someone abt this.

anyway she goes along when the squad are like c'mon let's see if we can see him. ok the only way i can describe this is you know the spiderverse like... spidey-sense recognition thing? that's basically what happens LOL Luke and Sayuri both have a FORCE USER RECOGNISED?? moment and Luke then makes a beeline for her then realises oh shit tiny teenager not jedi. would you LIKE to be a jedi?? and sayuri who hates her village and is feeling the strongest emotional connection she's felt in forever w this stranger she met 2 seconds ago is like okay fuckin sure yeah. and woo jedi!!

i posted my unposted nymie art yesterday but likkeeee pretend theres some here <3

So Sayuri falls into the "one of the Jedi found them thru the force or by chance" category of students who get found. However Nymie very much falls into the second category, which is "CAN SOMEONE DEAL WITH THIS WEIRD SUPERPOWERED CHILD FOR US????"

So 2 things about Nymie: 1. like i've said before, she's from a very rich high class pantoran family. super stuck up, mostly raised by nannies & tutors, but somehow Nymie just didn't get the stuck-up genes like all her (4!!) siblings who are just obsessed w their social standing etc and is instead just :D all the time. 2. her proficiency ig is the living force esp in the 'good at connecting to animals' way (which I think means I legally need to draw her w Ezra).

so the former often led her to escaping her family's stuffy parties and galas or whatever (usually to whoever's house it is' garden or somewhere she wasnt meant to be) to find something interesting. usually a pet <3 one particular time when she was 9 she was following her Pet Sense but couldnt find anything in the house. so she kinda just reached out more and long story short thats how Nymie managed to call this hugemassive beast (i'd tell u what it was if i knew pantoran animals LOL) out of the nearby countryside to her. massively distressing for everyone, all these rich ppl were like "OH MY GOD I NEARLY DIED" (it didnt attack anyone). very funny exciting time for Nymie who was enjoying this new beastie friend til animal control showed up. saddening. everyone is confused bc HOW did that happen

a dude old (and cool) enough to have seen more than one jedi in their heyday (+ idk uni researcher knows his shit) noticed what happened w it going straight to Nymie and overheard her account and realised what happened and was like hi nymie's parents. i think u need to get into contact w the new republic bc thats a jedi right there (which they take and go oo social climbing. we have a jedi child people will think we're cooler. bc theyre assholes)

and yeah im losing steam now but luke shows up and she joins the academyyay!

#i tried to NOT go on a 2000 hour ted talk #bc im pretty sure i could give a solid 5k of meta on top of any explanations of abt... 95% of my OCs lolll #which does mean this comes off as a lil messy but hey #sayuri ireshla #nymie #oc #original characters #luke's students

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