~Why have you forsaken me?~ Tw: Religious Symbolism, Blood, Slight glitching effect

Made with: Powerdirector Song: Chop Suey by System of a Down (Sped Up) Fyodor and Jesus parallels. I’m not a digital artist but hey I tried 🤷

Fyodor resurrecting for the first time: 🤷🏻‍♂️:3

Fyodor needs help sometimes even if he doesn't want it

Content Warnings: Self-neglect, degradation, humiliation, (Neither of which are particularly "sexy" it's more just Fyodor being put in his place through his own stupidity), this... isn't healthy for Anyone...

no smut today, sorry :( there Is a part 2 to this with smut. So if you want to see the pathetic, problematic, and malnourished, twink getting railed come back in a bit :3

You sigh as you look at Fyodors pill bottle. You'd recently put a cap on it that had a timer telling when it had last been opened. You suspected that he hadn't been taking his meds. The timer showed that it had been over two days since Fyodor had taken his medication, and even then, he only took it because you brought it to him.

You head up to his computer room where you find him hunched over his keyboard, typing away at lines of code. "Hey Fedya?" He hums as if he hears you but isn't listening. You continue anyway. "You haven't taken your meds in a few days... how are you feeling?"

"Fine," He says without looking up from typing. "When's the last time you got up to eat or use the bathroom?" You ask worriedly. Fyodor sighs. "I do not need you babying me. I can care for myself, you know." He says flatly. "You haven't taken your meds in two days... I worry about you. When's is the last time you slept in a bed and not at your desk?" He stops typing and pinches the bridge of his nose in irritation. "Not all of us get to sit around and do nothing you know some of us have actual work to do." This makes you pause irritation boiling under your skin. "Excuse me? I do plenty thank you very much. I'm the only one who does anything around here." You snap he has never been this expressly disrespectful to you. "You do nothing but annoy me and take me away from my work! I don't need your help! I realize you are too dumb to understand how important what I'm doing is, but you can at least have the decency to let me do it. As for what you do around here, you do nothing but take up space and money!" He snaps angrily you pause your eyes wide, all the times you've made sure he had water and tea as he worked, made sure he was eating, brought him food if he hadn't eaten yet, brought him his meds, all of that to him was simply an interruption? An irritation? Not to mention you took care of most of the chores, though he helped with a few such as the trash ...Fine then if that's how he saw it. "Very well, then I'll stop." You sat icily your eyes narrowed. "Since you will be fine without me helping, I'll leave you be." He seems pleased at that. "Good." Is all he says before he turns back to his monitors. You don't hesitate to turn and leave.

True to your words the next four? Maybe five days? You don't do anything for him. You knew when you two started dating, he needed something akin to a caretaker as he was oblivious to his own health, unable to feel hunger, thirst, or even exhaustion the way most do. It stemmed from his autism and you were willing to help him out of love for him. You never thought you'd have that affection thrown back at you in such a volatile way. You haven't seen him for a few days making no effort to seek him out.

You are sitting in the living room reading a book quietly when he stumbles in. He looks terrible. He hasn't showered in about two weeks at this point, hasn't had his meds in a week, and God knows when the last time he ate was. You only barely glance at him before returning to your book. You watch him lean against the counter as he makes his way to where his meds are stored. Once he get his hands on them, he looks at the caps timer, showing him its been almost a week since he's taken them. His hands shake as he struggles to open the pill bottle, the childproof cap, making it impossible for him when he's this weak. You watch him from over the edge of your book. He is genuinely struggling, but you can also tell he's putting on a bit of a show to garter pity from you to make you feel bad for leaving him to fend for himself. You don't give him any instead of going back to actually reading flipping the page. After quite a bit of time, he finally stumbles over to you and holds the bottle out to you. "Open this." He says gruffly. "You don't need my help. You should be fine." You say not looking up at him though you can see his hand trembling in your peripheral. Your words make him pause.

He tries to open the bottle again with no luck he stands there swaying slightly, his pride not letting him admit he was wrong or that he needs help. He tries to pull your book down, but he is too weak to succeed. You watch him sway again before he crumples at your feet, the pills bottle rolling away from him. You still don't look up from your book as you flip the page. If he wants anything from you, he needs to put his pride aside. He sits there, trembling at your feet for a few minutes before weakly whispering, "I'm sorry..." It's makes you laugh a little inside. "Pardon? I didn't hear what you said. Would you like to repeat that?" You ask without looking up from your book. "I'm sorry..." You nod. "Hmm, that's a start. What are you sorry for?" His eyes are unfocoused, and he's barely keeping himself upright. "I'm sorry for yelling at you."

"And?"

"...And I was wrong."

"About?"

"I was wrong, I do need you..." You nod again as you flip the page. "Yes, you do, don't you." He waits for a moment before he continues "...Are you going to help me now?" You laugh finally closing your book. "And why would I do that? You've done the bare minimum." Fyodors eyes widen, "please..." He whispers weakly. "Please, what?" You ask with a smirk as you watch him sway on his knees. "Convince me." He takes a shakey breath. I'm looking like he might cry. "Please help me... I feel like I'm going to pass out, and I can't... I can't take care of myself right now." You tilt his head back so you can observe him better. "It's almost a pity I have to put you back together... I kind of like you like this. Weak and pathetic, not that you aren't weak and pathetic normally, but... it's just you look pretty when your half way from deaths doorstep." He whines a hint of fear in his eyes. Sure, he could kill you with a touch, but the idea that he is weak and pathetic normally makes him uncomfortable. "I really should make you work for my help... but I'm feeling... Generous. So instead, I'll only make you beg. Sit back on your knees and put your hands up to your chest like a dog. I want to see you beg like one. After all, I have to care for you like a pet."

Fyodor shudders but does it his body barely stable for very long as he holds his hands up in an imitation of paws he looks at you, embarrassment evident in his face. "Good enough, I guess." You sigh idly, he whimeprs, letting his body relax so he doesn't fall further to the floor he rests his forehead on your knee. "Please~" He whispers meakly. Finally, you move him onto the couch and lay him down with a sigh.

You go get his meds, water, and soup since you don't trust him to keep solid food down right now. You come back to him asleep, and you almost feel bad about having to wake him up, but you know you need to. He needs to eat and drink. You carefully nudge him awake and set about nursing your brilliant moron of a boyfriend back to health. You wake him up not as gently as you usually would. You shove the pills into his mouth, then yank his head back and force him to drink, double tapping his cheek once he swallows. "T-thank you... my love..." You help him eat the soup since his hands tremble. "You wouldn't be in this mess if you simply listened to me, you know." You sigh as you pet his hair the soup bowl finally empty "If you had just been a good boyfriend and accepted my care you would fine, but no you have to be a selfish stubborn brat." He looks up at you with glassy eyes. "I'm sorry... I'll try and be better..."

You shake your head and sigh, carrying him to lay down in bed. A shower will have to wait till tomorrow. "Sleep, you can make it up to me tomorrow, Fedya." He nods and nuzzles into you, clinging to you out of anxiety that you'll abandon him again. You kiss his forehead as he drifts off.

Bible study with Fyodor when?

i couldn't stop thinking about the rat man so here he is

Rat vents to Atsushi about Fyodor

The original idea under the cut.

I couldn't find the original post, so here's a screenshot of it. It belongs to @starlightshadowsworld

i'm still in a dream.

Women!!!!!

rat man sketch today

colors reflecting my bram sketch from the other day bc i love pain apparently

more traditional artttt

FYODOR!!!! (anemic rat man)

fun fact: i rewatched dead apple today and decided to study the architecture and dimensions of draconia (which i estimated in the measurement of Dazais) because i’m clearly a functioning neurotypical member of society

and through my research (if you could call it that) i discovered that there are roughly 1,728 gems in that building

and if we combine that knowledge with the fact that every single gem came from the life of a gifted killed through shibusawa’s fog, that means that number is also shibusawa’s body count. listen to me okay listen to me me that’s the MINIMUM number. the MINIMUM. he could’ve killed DOZENS more than that without even using the fog and we don’t know we’d have no idea okay do you hear me

so there’s some lovely knowledge for you all have fun with your “[insert character] is the most powerful bsd character” theories, this enby hoe could’ve easily killed every gifted in the world if he didn’t get nerfed by russian ratatouille over here i. i think i’m gonna go to sleep now goodnight i

i have a confession

this man is SO fine and i will not take any criticism on it. hes tall, good-looking, and a girl dad. what is there to hate?

oh? what’s that? he’s a vampire and has infected half the population? he was feeling a little silly can you forgive him? it’s been several centuries he is a CHANGED MAN

aside from that i’m glad the manga is finally adding new info we didn’t learn from the anime. not much to say now because there’s too much we DONT know, but i’m thinking fyodor’s ability has something to do with killing people and taking their life force for his own. maybe. super excited to see the next chapter

PROBABLY . HE SAID PROBABLY . NOT DEFINITELY . SIGMA IS FINE THIS MEANS HES FINE EVERYTHING IS PERFECTLY FINE .

𝗦𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗱 𝘂𝗽, "𝗥𝗮𝘁 𝗠𝗮𝗻," 𝗼𝗻 𝗣𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗮𝘂𝘁𝘆:

He's washing him and his clothes bitch

He's washing him and his clothes