My human insides don't work like they should. I can feel my insides dead and dormant, yet my exterior seems alive. It doesn't last for long once the tiredness sets in. I become only a corpse with a small soul, staggering around with no aim. I can't feel food fulfillment nor hunger. I am dead. I am not living or beating. I feel empty.

hate all the non-dollkin stuff in the dollkin tag... its like they dont listen to us when we say "hey this isnt dollkin dont tag your stuff as such." i swear, do they even look into what theyre tagging? i just dont understand.. also with dollkin stuff that Is there... i dont know, none of it fits me. i feel like i have to fit into this certain label or look that is dollkin (porcelain dolls, lolita fashion, pastel clothing, overall a soft look to it). like yeah, im a bjd, but im just that! a bjd! i dont wear frilly dresses i wear pants. i dont wear makeup. i dont look 'soft' i look like ive been at a rave for 3 days straight. my body just so happens to be a bjd. i also dont feel like i need to be taken care of, played with, etc etc... im just . a doll. needing to be held by a doll stand. nothing else, thats it. i think also why i dont 'fit in' with dollkin is because im an anthro cat bjd, with felt (theres a specific material but i forgot the name of), fake fur, no hair style, resin eyes, etc. its very specific, so when i see other dollkin i feel alienated. you dont think of me when you hear dollkin,.. so i try to get into their 'look' but it just doesnt work. because its not me. absolutely no hate to any dollkin who are like what i just described, i love you all!!! /gen. i too love trad. bjd's and lolita fashion! but its just not me, you know? what im wishing for is just for more variety, more representation of myself.

🌌

( 🎀 ) :: ❝ Porcelain BJDollkin ❞

— ❝ Porcelain Ball Jointed Dollkin ❞ :: ❝ an otherkin term for those who identify partially or fully as a porcelain ball joined doll ❞

( 🎀 ) :: Rq’d by @starryvan622 ^^

Please read my rentry before interacting ! Don't repost ! ♡

I don't want to pick out my own clothes anymore. Dress me up, position me, play with me. I'm a doll meant to be adorned in all the fanciest clothing. Care for me and love me. I'm everything you want me to be and more. I'm perfection waiting to be shown. I'm nothing without it.

aren't I pretty?

home.

my joints ache and I feel so brittle. In those moments, I remember how fragile of a doll I am. How fast I can shatter in any given moment.

pain...

always pain.

I usually post fem dolls, but I do very much prefer masculine ones. I wish to look like them so dearly.

all-seeing. never moving.

On days like these I want nothing more to be just a fragile little doll, who does nothing but sit and look pretty. A display of beauty that is admired by all and is loved and played with. These human desires and ideals are too much for me. They break my poor doll mind. Why can't I just live my beautiful doll life? Empty and devoid of all otherworldly emotions and problems?

I feel my fangs, long and sharp. They pierce through skin and rip limb to limb.

My heart is a void, ever beating but never existing.

My eyes see all, glass eye to glass eye. I hear the void, through my toyed facade.

Ears perk up and I claw at the light, but only then I notice there was none to night.

sadness is so comforting, because then I feel void of everything. My body is empty and I am finally my true self. An empty, voided doll. With no feeling, no expression. Even if my tears fall I sit quiet and still. I become nothing.

they have so many doll me's! my perfect form :3

being a trad goth dollkin is weird sometimes because people expect me to be all dainty and frilly and soft but no. I am dark and ragged and loud. I have ripped tights and black clothing and wild hair. I'm covered in blood and sleeping in coffins. I'm not a cutesy frilly soft doll with poofy pink dresses and white tights. I exceed such an image nor do I fit it.

i love little dolls with carvings. they are just so beautiful.