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#as much as I wanted to write something that made chronological sense or
Note
Can you write something with gale and Maureen? Like him taking care of her when she’s sick? Or trying to help her fall asleep?
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Love this request doll, thank you. I’ve gotten quite a few requests asking for a fic of him taking care of her when she’s sick/cold, etc, and while I’ll certainly write another corresponding with those, I felt like yours gave me a chance to establish a little chronology of his doting on her. Which leads us to—helping her fall asleep on the:
First Night
It had been lights out for over an hour now, and still, Gale could sense the shifting restless around him. As the men’s initial post-battle fatigue had lessened and the dull predictability of one’s camp days settled in, the nights became longer, less restful and more of a routine than a respite. They could lay in their beds most the day or else walk and sit and lay somewhere else, there was no exhausted relief to be found climbing into a bunk. Gale missed the taxing demand for rest that came with a regimented military life. He knew he wasn’t alone in it.
Now there was the invigorating addition of the presence of the women at camp, and like kids at a sleepover -or so Gale heard sleepovers were like that, he’d never been to one- all rooms were filled with restless chit chat and lack of calm. He’d had to go along the hall of his integrated combine before lights out to warn everyone to shush it.
At least they were amalgamating well.
There was so much to catch up on by each crew and any new bit of information a new prisoner carried in was worth more than Broadway tickets back home, added to that was the old natural way of men not knowing when to shut the hell up around the fairer sex.
So Gale had knocked on doors and doused lightbulbs like the bucket of cold water that he was, and then returned to his own bunk in the subsequent quiet, only to cave and allow John Brady thirty more minutes of risky light use to keep mending -and watch his tolerably death-like and unconscious sister as she shallowly breathed on a lower bunk.
Gale had once hauled himself up and out of his second tier bunk opposite her to put his hand in front of Ida’s lips, she had gotten so still for a bit. “You should sleep by her.” he told Brady, recalling times his father’s warmth had been the only thing to keep him alive some nights in the park. He was rather certain Johnny meant to do it anyway, but he wasn’t a readable fella and his curt nod was all Gale got along with the ever faithful, “yes sir.”
When Gale had finally demanded they cut the bulb, he watched as Brady carefully climbed in and lay behind Ida without disturbing her, two lanky, stacked sardines with plenty of room and not enough fat on either of them to keep a water bottle thawed in this weather. Gale shrugged and flicked the light -family genes couldn’t be helped.
What could be helped was Maureen’s dripping hair. After the showers she had sat herself down at the table and demanded they deal her a hand of cards, burnt auburn hair dripping ice water down the back of her borrowed shirt.
Her shivers rattled her so badly she had dropped her cards multiple times, made worse by her mangled hands. They’d paused the game to have Hambone and Tallulah come in and wrench her middle and fourth fingers straight. Hamilton swore he had experience from his own injuries and T. Smith had grown up on a farm, excellent referrals both. The ordeal could’ve been worse, Gale supposed.
Benny had gagged while watching it, Gale had wanted to while holding her wrist down, Hambone had growled “fuck” more times than John had ever heard him during a mission and Ida didn’t even wake from Maureen’s yells -so out of it was she on the bunk she’d wobbled into and fallen asleep on.
Now Maureen sat stubbornly at the table in the dark, still consulting her deck of cards as if she could discern a diamond from a spade.
“Bed.” Gale told her despite her petulance, and the boys were good enough not to encourage her rebellion for once, taking themselves to their own bunks with little fanfare, “Don’t wanna get us in trouble for lights on your first night do ya? Make Ida stand out in the cold for inspections? Good, because I don’t want you out there with that hair.”
“It’s taking forever to dry and I don’t want to get my pillow wet.” Maureen protested.
“You can’t just sit here in the dark.” he muttered.
“Johnny would’ve.” she hit back. Gale wasn’t sure since when John Brady had been the yardstick by which Maureen measured human behavior, but it had been about as long as Gale knew her.
“Yeah but now Johnny’s in bed like a good boy.” Gale observed.
He heard someone titter and if he had to throw a dart at the offender in the gray dark it would be aimed towards Demarco’s bunk. “Johnny hasn’t got my hair. Ida either…anymore.” she added with childlike insensitivity.
“You should braid it.” Demarco’s voice suggested from the dark of his bunk.
“Hands can’t do squat.” Maureen was starting to sound offended by how often they forgot about her hands. She’d dropped her cards as often from their gnarled swelling as from her shivers, and every time one of the guys tried to ignore it or give a kinder explanation she would hold them up like she wanted them to recall what she was working with. Most of the fellas would’ve rather looked into hell’s portal than keep contemplating her hands or what they meant.
“Lemme braid your hair.” Gale told her, he didn’t ask and he didn’t thank Benny for the suggestion.
Maureen scoffed as he scooped up the frigid, wet strands from her shoulders and began to divide them in his hands. “Like you know how.”
“I do.” he patiently insisted after a few moments of the more convincing argument of his actually braiding it.
“Who else have you done this for? Who taught you?” Maureen’s jealousy was palpable to everyone and even Brady snickered softly at her this time.
“Horses, Maureen. My uncle had horses.”
Maureen didn’t reply to that, in fact, besides brawling japes during cards and her arguments against bedtime,
she hadn’t said much since coming back from the showers. She was cold to the touch when Gale finished his braid and squeezed the last bit of wet he could from the woven rope and then he bodily deposited her in her bunk. An adjacent one to his, on the same level, their heads were nearly beside each other’s in the cramped stack.
And now, an hour afterwards, everyone was still tossing in the dark except for Ida and her brother, and Gale had no peace with Maureen’s chattering teeth just a few inches away and her crushed hands dancing in front of his eyes everytime he closed them.
He thought of a lot of things to whisper to her, questions, comforts, even jokes. They never got out of his tightening throat as sixty minutes ticked by and he kept staring up at the slats of the bunk above him like that would keep the flashing image of her hands away. Suddenly the chatter of teeth stopped and he felt himself begin to relax in turn, hopeful she’d drifted off.
The unmistakable sound of a sob followed shortly after and it messed with the rhythm of his heart worse than jumping from his spiraling plane had.
“Maureen?” he questioned softly, as if there could be any doubt.
The sobs only gained frequency and vigor. Gale rolled himself over on his belly, and without thinking it through for once, impulsively threaded his arm through the divide to her bunk, laying his arm along her pillow and cupping the cheek closest to him. The humid blast of her breath against his palm tore at him and he thumbed over her wobbling lips. “Maureen,” he begged again, hoarse from his damn throat and in an effort to be quiet, “what- what is it?”
What can I do?—is what he meant.
“Having a cry Cleven.” She informed him angrily and without discretion in her volume except for what her sniffles required, “Can’t a gal have a well earned cry? Told you I wouldn’t manage to sleep.”
Ah, so the cry was his fault. Gale sighed and couldn’t help his sideways glance at Ida’s bunk. Not that he wanted such unnatural, deathly peace for Maureen. It would scare the fuck out of Gale, just as it was scaring the fuck outta Johnny who Gale knew was owl eyed awake right across from him and his now sobbing bombardier.
“I’m sorry.” Gale offered her impotently, childish habits coming to the fore in his helplessness, -how sorry he’d been time and again growing up, sorry for wall street crashing and Hoover having won that last time and the fact there weren’t any more quarters left for a soda and that the malnourished dog lost that one race and being sorry, so goddamn sorry all the damn time just so his father would finally absolve him with, “it’s ok, son” in return.
“And now my pillow’s wet!” -Maureen never absolved him of shit, she piled on and somehow Gale found himself devoted to that honest cruelty too, in a more mature, twisted, fucked sorta way. “I told you my pillow would get wet and I’d be cold!”
“You can have mine.” he tried.
“Oh yeah, and get it wet too.” her anger huffed out into his palm and it made him feel funny, like he was feeling her breath all along him, her emotion too, her outright disapproval of him. It always made him feel funny, feel desperate without feeling wrong or sorry. He’d never taken the fall for something that wasn’t his to own up to, not since he became a man. Not until her. He felt himself swelling against the mattress and wanted to say sorry for that, too.
—can’t help it around you.
He’d taken up excuse making as well since her, it proved so damn effective. Way more than his apologies.
“I could use cooling down.” he realized aloud and tugged her damp pillow out from under her head without warning, “Don’t fuckin’ test me Kendeigh, not tonight.” he warned at her stiff neck as he used her braid to lift her head and slide his under her head.
He settled his confiscated pillow closer to hers, his cheek pressed to her tears and shower wet, their heads practically aligned and in the dim light he could make out the curve of her nose. Such a pretty nose, he’d been enchanted with it from the minute she cocked her head at him in the glass nose of Our Baby.
Maureen had stopped crying. Her arm swung above her head and slithered under his blankets until she’d grabbed hold of what she wanted, bringing his hand up by the wrist until it was cupping her cheek again. She nuzzled her face into it and kissed his palm, the glitter of her eyes discernible between his fingers to the scrutiny of a lover as enamored as Gale.
“Sorry.” she whispered at long last into his palm and he shuddered.
“Don’t be sorry.” he commanded.
“I feel better.” she said.
“Good.”
Her hand darted out the top of her blanket and cupped his cheek, mirroring him. She thumbed at the smooth skin of his face with a swollen thumb until she found his poorly healed scar. “Wanna give it a try?” she asked. “We swapped pillows, it’s wet anyway, no one would know.”
“I don’t need a cry.” he declined gently.
“Ooh, does my Major need other things?” Maureen’s voice had gone saucy -and thankfully hushed- despite the stuffed up quality of her nose but the thought of her hands curdled his reaction to the tease immediately.
“No.” he breathed, hating the crowded room and the faux intimacy of this moment. Maureen was always more immune to intrusion but he couldn’t pretend to match her. “I just need you safe.” he begged, for if her ordeal had ended at her arrival here, he felt his had just begun.
The thumb stroking Gale’s cheek dipped lower until it was tracing his upper lip, slipping to the crease of his mouth, gently parting his plush lips until she had her finger past them, resting on his teeth. “I’m with you.” Maureen muttered, “Of course I’ll be safe.”
Gale closed his mouth around her, tongue lathing at the pad of her thumb, cheeks hollowed in an innate impulse for suction. Maureen’s presence made him feel odd, always had. Her nose came to rest against his and that was the last he recalled of the night, the gusts of her breath evening out against his face, the weight of her thumb on his tongue, the drowsy and unheeded regret that he had already compromised so far on their first night.
When he was startled awake next morning by a shake to the shoulder, mouth dry and her thumb still between his teeth, Cleven could only be grateful it was by Brady and unseen by the rest of the still sleeping men. The fact Maureen seemed to have been already awake and merely staring at him while he slept was another unsettling matter. As were the deep circles under Brady’s soft eyes: the kid looked like he hadn’t slept a wink and Gale wondered briefly how long his poor subordinate had stared at his bunk and hoped the thumb would fall out before rousing his superior. Or if Maureen had made eye contact during it. Oh for God’s sake...
Obviously Brady’s patience had run out with a hard shake, because -“It’s Ida, she won’t fuckin’ respond but she’s bowin’ up till I think her neck might snap.”
Well that got Gale tumbling out of bed.
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1-800-kami · 8 months
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picture perfect | geto suguru x gn!reader (1.1k words)
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this drabble is actually so corny but i love the idea sm so i wrote it. i love this man so much i want to eat him (i'm also starting to realize that all of my works so far have a similar overarching theme in them... hm)
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artist!geto who would always be willing to show you his latest works. in fact, you’re the first one to see them. as soon as he finishes an artwork, he calls you over and shows it or sends a picture. you’re happy that you’re the first one that he always thinks about when he finally puts down that brush. you’ve seen most of his artworks…
…except for one sketchbook. it was a regular old leather sketchbook, and you never saw the inside of it. whenever geto was drawing on it and you walked in the room, he’d quickly hide it and play it off as if he were doing nothing at all. it always made you curious, but you just assumed that his sketchbook was something like a diary. you knew that people owned private journals where they wrote down things only meant for their own eyes to see. art could be nothing different, so you tried not to pry on what geto drew in that sketchbook… even though you itched to ask at times.
you remember one time when you had an idea of what that sketchbook contained, though. you were curled up next to him in bed, fast asleep. you awoke to the gentle nightlight softly awakening your senses, and you stirred. 
that’s when you noticed that geto was drawing on that sketchbook again. curiosity took the best of you, and you pretended to be asleep as you observed geto. a pattern quickly formed over the next few minutes–he would look at your “sleeping” form, flick his eyes back to the sketchbook, draw a few lines, and then repeat the process.
ah. so he was drawing you.
the idea made you smile subconsciously. it also made you feel a little shy. geto dedicated a whole sketchbook just for drawings of you? the thought was so adorable that it made your heart beat a little faster. still, why didn’t he let you see them? was he too shy?
this memory all comes back flooding to your head in your current situation. you had a nice at-home dinner date with geto earlier, and he surprised you with all your favorite meals. these dates weren’t too out of the blue for the both of you, as sometimes, home-cooked meals just tasted better than a fancy restaurant’s meal. there was a notion in your head that today’s date felt a little different than usual, and it seems that you were right.
geto specifically told you to walk down this hallway of your house, as he said that he had “a surprise for you”. you were in awe at what you saw–along the walls of this corridor contained drawings–so many drawings strewn across the hall one by one. all of them were drawings of memories that he shared with you in chronological order. the day he confessed his love to you, your first kiss with him in the passenger seat of his car, your first date (out of many) with him, the first time you celebrated your birthday with him, your anniversary… you relived all of these moments as you walked down the hall. these drawings were all so accurate–geto getting your face shape just right… and the way he was somehow able to capture your smile so perfectly.
you wonder how much time he’s spent on these drawings, especially with how amazing they were. you think all of his works are great, but these are all so personal that it warms your heart differently compared to seeing his typical artworks. 
more memories are envisioned in your head as you continue walking. the exciting day you spent with him at the carnival, (feat gojo as the unhappy thirdwheel) your third holiday season spent together, the-
the last drawing catches you off guard, though. the writing on the bottom states today’s date, and it’s a drawing of you, standing up, and geto, kneeling down while holding a box with a shimmering ring inside. wait, that hasn’t happened before-
oh.
oh.
it was like you could literally feel his presence behind you. tears fill your eyes as you turn around, and there he was, seeing your boyfriend of over three years deciding that he officially wants to spend the rest of his life with you. 
the two of you recreated the last drawing perfectly. 
“i’m so nervous about all of this going wrong that i completely forgot half of my speech… fuck.” he says, and you giggle despite your heart hammering in your chest. you were just as nervous as he was. “i never really saw myself as a marriage type of guy. i thought that i’d spent the rest of my life not being held down by anyone… until i met you, of course. you’re just so enamoring to me, and i bought that sketchbook so i can illustrate each important memory that i’ve spent with you, so i can look back on them until i’m grey and old and i can hardly remember what i’ve had for breakfast in the morning. i’ve spent hours and hours with a pencil in hand, sketching every detail of you until my hand is all cramped up, but i’m willing to do that for the rest of my life if you’re the subject of my drawings. i want to spend the rest of my life with you, so…
y/n l/n, will you marry me?”
you waste no time in nodding your head furiously, tears now flowing freely down your cheeks. you often thought about marrying geto, picturing his proposal as something grand–like in front of all your friends or during a fancy night out at the beach. this… was not something that you pictured at all, but it feels so domestic and real, and now that it’s happening, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
you pull your now-fiance into a much-needed kiss, and he takes your shaky hands in his cold ones as he slides the engagement ring down your ring finger. it was so beautiful. he’s so beautiful. this entire moment is so beautiful, and you’re glad you have a drawing to commemorate it forever. there are so many things you want to say to him, and you don’t know where to start, so you just utter the words that are at the forefront of your brain. “i love you suguru, i love you so fucking much.”
“i love you too. ‘m so happy you said yes,” he breathes out, cupping your cheeks with his hands and smiling at your tear-struck face. “i can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
you nod your head in agreement, closing your eyes. “yeah. me too.”
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this was based off of that one extra gum commercial <3
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whumpsday · 11 months
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Kane & Jim #52: Trust
Chronological masterlist / Writing order masterlist
content: kidnapping, rescue, comfort, vampire whumpee / caretaker / whumper, whumper turned whumpee turned caretaker, caretaker turned whumpee, begging, humans as livestock, mild classism?
Whumpmas in July Day 12: Search & Rescue
here it is! i've been trying to write this one since literally april, sorry it took so long. i imagine the present arc as divided into 3 parts.
this is the finale of part 1!
-
It had been six months since Jim brought him home, and Kane was fully on a human schedule. He'd gotten into human music as well, with Jim bringing home new CDs for him on a regular basis. He liked to listen to them before bed, after Jim had locked him back downstairs and the sun had set. He would take notes on the music, his hand no longer shaking with weakness. And when he was done and the basement he'd come to think of as home was silent again, he would drift off to sleep. Plagued often with nightmares, but he always knew that he'd wake up safe and unharmed.
A quiet, peaceful life. Kane got a shallow bowl of fresh blood each day, Jim never hurt him, and he had his own little space with possessions of both need and want. He didn't care that he was a prisoner, that the now-fixed door bolted shut each night, that he was made to wear chains upstairs, that he couldn't leave if he wanted to. He was safe. He was happy, something he never thought he would be again.
So it was all the more worrying when his quiet night was interrupted by the screech of tires and the sound of someone's frantic struggling with the front door.
Kane got up from his desk and went to bed immediately, wrapping himself up in his blanket as his mind raced with possibilities. The hunters, always his first fear. It made no sense, they'd handed him over to Jim willingly, but he couldn't stop picturing it. His tormentors coming to snatch him away from his new, peaceful life, where he didn't hurt anybody and nobody hurt him, bringing him back to that horrible place where there was only pain. He shuddered at the thought.
The front door clicked open upstairs, the right key finally inserted. "Jim!" Liz's familiar voice cried.
Kane allowed himself to relax, somewhat. Yes, a hunter, but one who he knew by now wouldn't hurt him without cause. He could never bring himself to feel fully comfortable around her, but she hadn't harmed him yet. And if he kept being good, maybe she wouldn't ever.
Jim's footsteps came quickly, and though Kane couldn't make out the exact words of their conversation after Liz's initial shout, he could tell it wasn't good. She was crying, he was pretty sure.
Kane slowly got out of bed, concerned. Something was wrong, that much was obvious, but he was locked in the basement, and there was nothing he could do. He crept over to the stairs, but didn't climb them, unwilling to get closer to the silver door.
"They took Laken!" Liz sobbed. "They're gone!"
Kane felt his heart drop into his stomach. There was only one thing Liz could have meant by that, only one they she could have been talking about. The relief he would always feel when one of the more sadistic hunters never came back, his gratitude that vampire hunting was such a dangerous job, come back twisted and cruel. The kindest hunter he'd ever met had been taken.
He imagined Laken, always sweet and friendly, Laken who fed him with their own blood as his birthday present, alone and scared and in pain. Shipped off to the blood farms, or kept as someone's personal blood source, their mind stolen from them over and over until persuasion erased their warm, loving personality entirely.
Tears sprung to his eyes at the thought. He couldn't breathe all of a sudden, Liz's sobs perfectly encapsulating his own roaring despair. His head fell into his hands as he cried along with her, sitting on the bottom step. Laken was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Wasn't there?
Kane picked his tear-streaked face up as the gears started to turn. He stood and knocked on the wall, unable to touch the door itself. "Hello?"
"Kane, man, just- not right now, okay? Go back to bed," Jim called, voice choked up.
A direct order. Jim hardly ever gave those. Kane scurried obediently back to bed, listening to the humans cry.
It was only a few minutes before he got back up. He was defying orders, now. He hadn't defied orders in years, hadn't ever defied one of Jim's, not since coming here. His legs felt like gel, his hands shaking at the prospect. But he had to.
He knocked on the wall again. "Jim?" he asked, wincing preemptively.
The door flew open, revealing Liz: bleeding from a wound on her jaw, her eyes red and puffy from crying, glaring down at him with unrepentant disdain. Stakes and nasty silver weapons still hung from her belt.
"What? What could you possibly want?" she snapped, her voice breaking.
Kane took a few steps back, heart pounding as he stared at her weapons. He'd disobeyed, and now the hunter was angry with him. He knew all-too-well that hunters always got more sadistic after they'd lost one of their own to his kind.
"I- I'm sorry, never mind," he backtracked, cowering away from her.
Jim peered over from behind his sister, wiping his face. "Lizzie-"
Liz paid him no mind, stomping down the stairs. "What? What is so important right now?" she demanded through tears.
Kane felt sick with panic, his safe haven suddenly horribly unsafe. He'd been doing so well, and now it would all be over, pain introduced back into his life. He bumped back against the wall, no more space for him to put between himself and the hunter.
"No, no, please!" he begged, holding his hands up defensively. "I'm sorry! I'll stop, please don't hurt me!"
"Liz?" Jim came down after her, arms wrapped around himself, looking haunted.
She kept her attention squarely on Kane. "No. I want to know. What?"
He should just make something up, he really should.
But Laken.
"I had an idea." He drew out each word as if to stall, his voice barely above a whisper.
Liz's voice came deadpan, devoid of anything besides resentment. "An idea."
Kane couldn't bear to look at her. He looked past, at Jim. Jim who had never hurt him, who had assured him over and over again that he was safe here. "I could- if you allow it, I could go over and try to bring Laken back?" he squeaked.
Liz pounded her fist against the wall next to him, making Kane yelp and duck for cover. Jim winced at the sound.
"Are you fucking serious!?" she shouted, her features contorted with fury. "Now? You're using this to try and escape, now of all times? What, so you can go join the party and take a human too?"
He cowered on the floor, breaths coming quick, like he couldn't get enough air. He knew this would be a mistake. "N-no, that's not what I meant! I'm sorry!"
Jim approached slowly, stepping past his sister despite his apparent fear. "Kane, you can get up. It's okay," he said softly, eyes distant.
"It's not okay! Nothing is fucking okay!" Liz screamed. She kicked the desk hard, and both men flinched. She sobbed and kicked it again, shaking.
Jim uncurled his arms from himself. "Kane. Look at me."
Another direct order. Kane looked up.
He had never seen Jim so serious. "Do you really mean it?"
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up, I really didn't mean anything bad by it, I'll-"
"Did you mean it?" Jim repeated. "You could get them back?"
Kane knew he should be begging for mercy right now. The last thing he should do was double down. But... it was Jim. Jim was safe.
"I don't know," he admitted. "I would need more information." He glanced briefly at Liz, still sobbing brokenly, before looking back to Jim. "I'd need at least a description of who took them. I'm sorry. Please- I was just trying to help." He wrung his hands anxiously. "I care about Laken, too."
Jim stared at him long and hard. "I've really tried to help you, you know that, right? Make life here not suck."
"I know." It was the one constant in Kane's new life. Even when he got scared and panicked, he knew Jim would make it better, help him calm down. "I would do anything to make it up to you. If you let me go- I would try my best to find them, and I'd come back either way. I'd go back down in the basement and you could still keep me here. I don't mind. I like it here. Please, I swear I'll come back." He stood up. "Please let me help."
Liz was paying attention again, but the fury had faded. "What's in it for you?"
"I just want to help." Kane had nothing more than that. He had no way to prove himself. All he had was his word, and given what he'd done, his hopes that they would believe it were slim.
The Liebermans shared a glance.
"I think he really means it," Jim offered.
Kane couldn't believe this was happening. Jim actually believed him.
Liz sighed wearily. "It was two of 'em. They were wearing the same clothes, like a uniform."
"Blood farms," Kane realized. That was good- it would be a lot easier to get them from one of those than someone's house, and there would be a lot fewer places to check. "I mean- a blood processing facility. I can find them. There's only so many of them nearby."
That broke her. For once, Liz looked at him with something other than poorly disguised hatred or the bare minimum of tolerance- she looked hopeful. "Please bring them back to me. I can't lose them," she pleaded.
It was surreal. A hunter had never begged him for anything before.
"I will," he promised. "Jim, could I borrow a suit?"
-
Kane was ready. Jim only had one suit, and it didn't fit him quite right: Jim was a few inches taller than him, and while Kane had made a lot of progress in the past five months, he still hadn't completely recovered from his years of starvation. But it would have to do. He looked more like his old self than he ever had, now.
He stepped into the front doorframe. He was outside, at night, fully fed and able to run. He'd never thought this would happen again.
"I'll see you soon. With Laken," he promised, determined. He put his hand forward.
Jim nodded. "Alright. You just- yeah." He shook Kane's hand, like they were making a deal, one Kane would be sure to honor. "Stay safe out there."
"I radioed base and let them know what's going on, so you shouldn't run into trouble with any hunters as long as you stay in our district on the way to the border," Liz added. "Straight shot."
The thought that every hunter in a 100-mile radius knew where he was and what he was doing was horrifying, but this meant he had permission. This was safer, he told himself. "Thank you."
And with that, he ran off into the night.
Kane hadn't run like this in years, hadn't even been physically able to until recently. There were no chains binding his ankles, not the hunters' cruel burning ones or Jim's soft padded ones. There was no weight of starvation sucking the muscle out of his body and the energy out of his stride. He ran faster and faster, and he would have laughed gleefully into the cool October air if he weren't so worried about Laken. Even the fact of being free brought fear- Jim wasn't here to protect him if something happened.
Despite his nerves, he crossed into vampire territory without issue. Like it was easy. Like it wasn't something that had been an unattainable fantasy just months ago.
It was only about two hours before he made his way to civilization. He slowed as he got to town, got to people- it was the middle of the night, and the streets were full of vampires, like him. He didn't have to hide. He didn't have to be afraid. He stopped for a few minutes and just watched, mesmerized. He hadn't seen more than Jim, Liz, and Laken since Jim rescued him, hadn't seen another vampire in so long-
"Doesn't that guy look like Kane de Sang?" a woman whispered to her friend, a hand shielding her mouth like that would prevent her from being heard.
"Stop reading tabloids. He's dead," her friend reminded her with a roll of her eyes.
Right. Father was a very public figure, his death must have made the news. He couldn't deal with this right now. He had to find Laken.
Kane hustled away. He almost went into a store to buy a map, before he remembered that he had no money. It was a strange feeling, not having any money, one he'd never experienced before. Technically he hadn't had any money since his capture, but he hadn't been in a position to buy anything either, so it hadn't come up. But now, he really could use some.
His bank accounts would be closed, of course. Not only did he have no money, he had no ID. He felt like one of those older vampires who complained that everything required paperwork these days, like Father.
That was one way he could solve things, he supposed. He could go home to Father. The thought of confronting him with the fact that he'd been held captive by humans all this time was unbelievably unappealing, but he would of course do it if that would help him save Laken. Though, his father would surely put a stop to any plans for him to take a human from the blood farms, no matter what excuse he used, naming it an embarrassment to the family. Nobles were supposed to catch their own prey, demonstrate their superiority.
But those women had mentioned a tabloid. That would mean his face was known, wouldn't it?
Kane ran a hand over his cheek, hardly even sunken anymore.
He was Kane de Sang. He just had to act like it.
-
It took him a while to find the closest blood farm, the one most likely to have Laken, but he found himself there eventually. He strutted in like he owned the place. Confident and assured, everything he used to be and wasn't anymore.
The blood processing facility was not a customer service establishment, and there was no obvious place to go to find someone to talk to. He approached a man carrying buckets of human food, foul-smelling as always. Cereal, he was able to recognize one as, after months of sitting with Jim as he ate his meals. The other contained some sort of organ meat he couldn't place, aside from the fact that it thankfully didn't smell human. Jim didn't eat meat anymore, said he'd stopped sometime after his escape.
"Excuse me, I need to speak to a manager?" His first words to another vampire in years.
The man eyed him up and down. "Yeah, place is too spread out for you business-types. They really should put some signs up. Follow me."
"Thank you." He definitely wasn't acting like his old self. The old Kane de Sang wasn't polite to commoners. But after years of having politeness drilled into him, it was hard to stop, and he saw no reason to.
The man took him to an office, Kane thanked him again, and it was over. He wanted to take the man's hands and weep, tell him how he was the first vampire he'd spoken to in years upon years, but he couldn't do that. He just watched him walk away to deliver the food to captive humans.
Right. Captive. Everyone in this place was keeping defenseless humans captive. They'd likely taken Laken, and even if they hadn't and Laken was at a different facility, they'd taken so many more.
He knocked on the office door twice before pushing it open. A normal office, an environment Kane was more familiar with.
"Hm?" An older man, clearly a manager, looked up from his desk.
"Ah, yes, I'd been told you're the manager? Kane de Sang," he introduced himself.
The manager raised an eyebrow. "Like the dead noble?"
"Like the living noble," Kane corrected. "I've been living off the grid, as they say."
The manager squinted at him, shock slowly dawning on his face. Perfect: he was recognizable enough to be believed. He wouldn't have to involve Father.
"I see. And what can I do for you, Mr. de Sang?"
"I believe a couple of your employees accidentally snatched up my escaped human." It was a lie that would have been completely unbelievable for anyone else except for him, given his lack of persuasion. "It wouldn't be hard to find mine, one with blue hair, just brought in earlier tonight?" It was possible that Laken could be at a different facility, but this one was so close to where they'd been captured that Kane was almost certain it was this one.
"I'm afraid I can't help you, Mr. de Sang," the manager said. "All of our humans are sourced directly from human territory. If you lost track of your human so much that it was willing to make it back there... well, a human belongs to whoever's taken it over the border."
There was no way a commoner would speak like that to any other noble besides him. The old anger rose up in him, like being back in vampire territory had allowed his old self to come crawling out of where Kane had buried him. He almost went to push away the bubbling rage, but...
He didn't need to anymore. He wasn't in danger. He was in vampire territory, and this man was keeping Laken away from him. Keeping Laken captive, hurt and scared-
Kane slammed his hand on the desk. "You will return my human at once!" he shouted.
He winced at his own outburst, visions of punishments flashing through his mind, eyes wild with fury and terror. Still, he did not stop. "Or I will do everything in my power to ruin you, through means legal or otherwise. I am not leaving without my human."
The manager seemed to mull over the idea before deciding that dealing with Kane was far more irritating than losing one human. He sighed, standing up. "Very well. Follow me."
Kane pulled his hand back, trembling. He should be punished for that. The hunters would have a field day with him if they knew how he'd acted out. Though, he doubted they'd care that he was disrespectful toward a fellow vampire.
"Yes, sir," he said on instinct.
The manager didn't seem to take it as unordinary, nodding and leading him to where the humans were stored. Kane followed along, bewildered it'd been that easy. They passed hundreds and hundreds of humans with dazed eyes and gone minds, packed into livestock pens. He was just glad they were too far-gone from persuasion exposure to feel anything at all.
Past that were closed rooms. Kane could hear someone shouting expletives behind one of the doors, like he had when he'd first been captured, and someone crying behind another, like him in all the years after. But he couldn't do anything about that: he had to focus on Laken.
"We keep the new captures in isolation," the manager explained, briefly peeking through small peepholes in the doors.
Kane remembered how Jim was when he first brought him home, a defiant teenager who hadn't yet learned fear. "That makes sense."
At last, the manager stopped in front of one of the doors, satisfied with what he'd seen through the peephole. "Blue hair, brand-new capture. This one was reported as a hunter, though, so probably not yours. I can-"
Kane practically leapt at the doorknob. "No, this one's mine! This is my human, you must be mistaken! Open the door!"
The manager sighed again, but obliged, unlocking it.
And there they were.
Laken sat huddled in the corner inside, just like Kane had been in his cell, stripped of their hunting tools. They were in bad shape: it was obvious they'd put up a fight before being taken. Their shirt was torn in a huge gash at the side, blood staining the edges, though Kane could smell that they weren't bleeding anymore. They clutched their arm to their chest defensively, like it was hurt, and looked up at him with fear in their eyes.
But he couldn't comfort them yet. "This is my human," he insisted.
"Kane?" Laken asked, voice drenched in fear and betrayal.
It broke his heart to see Laken so terrified. Of him, at that. They either didn't realize what his plan was, or... didn't think him morally capable of coming to their rescue, after everything they must have heard from Jim about what he'd been like in vampire territory.
"Huh. I guess this is your human. Up you get, then." The manager waved them over.
Laken slid up the wall and shuffled over, shaking.
Kane scooped them into his arms, careful to avoid aggravating their injuries. Laken was bigger than him, but far weaker, he realized. He was strong now. He'd been strong for a long time, ever since Jim started feeding him. He just felt so consistently vulnerable that it hadn't really sunk in until now.
Laken didn't resist, the fact of their helplessness equally obvious to them.
"Thank you," Kane told the manager, curt. He turned and hasted toward the exit, relieved it had gone so smoothly.
As soon as they got out, he opened his mouth to start explaining, but Laken beat him to it.
"Kane? Buddy?" Their voice was too strained to sound natural as they peered up at him with nervous eyes. "We're friends, right? Remember when we did your birthday together? Listen, if it's my blood, you can have some! That's fine! I just-"
Kane hugged them close. "I'm here to rescue you," he choked out, trying not to cry. "It's okay. You're safe now."
He felt Laken untense all at once. "Oh, thank fucking god. I totally thought..." They laughed giddily, wiping their tears away with their good arm, but more came anyway. "Dude, you're a lifesaver. Like, literally."
"I'm- I'm trying to be good. I want to be better." Not just well-behaved. Good.
"Well, you're being pretty damn good to me right now." Laken reclined in his arms. "Hey, how fast can you get going? Those assholes who took me were pretty fast, and they didn't even seem like they were trying all that hard. What's, like, the fastest you can get?"
Kane burst into a grin. "You want to find out?"
-
He could tell it wasn't as fast as he'd ever gone. Kane was still in the process of recovering all the muscle he'd lost during his captivity, and though his speed was still at least forty miles per hour if he had to guess, it wasn't top-level for a vampire. Still, Laken seemed impressed, so he took it as a win.
Liz was waiting on Jim's porch, Jim just inside, talking to her through the window. As soon as he set Laken down, they ran at Liz, but not as fast as she ran at them. They met in the middle with such force that Laken cried out in pain, but neither stopped, wrapping each other in a tight embrace.
"I thought you were gone!" Liz wept. "You were gone, they took you!"
Laken laughed, alight with joy. "Can't get rid of me that easy."
Jim opened the front door, and almost took a step out onto the porch, but hesitated, obviously frightened by the night's events.
Kane scampered up to him. "I came back. Just like I said," he reported, grinning.
"You really did. Huh." Jim stared at him like he'd never seen him before.
"And- and now you know. You know I'd always come back. And if anyone ever tried to take you, I'd bring you back, too. Just like how I saved Laken." Quieter, he added, "Just like how you saved me."
Jim smiled at that, finally finding the courage to step onto the porch. He nudged Kane's shoulder. "Right back at you."
Kane beamed. Jim had promised him he was safe from the hunters over and over, but it felt different this time. Not an attempted comfort during an episode of panic, but mutually-assured protection. There was something to it that felt stronger, more real. A bond.
"I'm gonna take Laken to the hospital!" Liz called back. "And hey, Kane? Thank you."
A thank-you from Liz was almost as precious as the fact that she was trusting him unrestrained, alone with Jim, at night. She still wore her hunting gear, but she felt less scary for once.
He nodded back at her. "Any time."
"See you guys!" Laken gave them finger-guns, punctuated with an "Ow," when they moved their injured arm wrong.
Liz laughed and helped them into her truck, leaving him alone with Jim.
"I'll go back in the basement," Kane promised. "Just like before. Nothing has to change."
Jim blinked with disbelief. "Are you kidding me? Kane, I'm not gonna keep you locked up anymore. I'm not saying I'd never be scared around you again, but... you're not a prisoner anymore."
Kane should feel happy about that, shouldn't he? That's what he'd wanted for so long, trapped in his cell back with the hunters.
Why did it make his stomach turn with dread?
"Um, I don't-"
"I mean, there's not enough time left before sunrise for you to get home tonight, especially if you wanna pack first. But you're not trapped in my basement anymore. You're free to go, man. You can head back home tomorrow night if you want."
Kane shuffled his feet awkwardly. "What if I... don't want?"
"Don't... want? You don't want to be free?" Jim asked, baffled.
Tears sprung to Kane's eyes. This was his home, the only home he'd known in years. "I don't want to leave," he whispered.
Jim exhaled a long breath, the smile dropping from his face. He was silent for a moment before taking Kane's hand. "Okay."
"Okay?" he sniffled, fingers curling around Jim's.
"Okay, you can stay. Long as you keep your promise and protect me. Plus you gotta get your own blood now. And I guess-" Jim chuckled, shaking his head. "I guess we can figure it out as we go."
"I can still wear the chains," Kane offered. "So you feel safe."
"Man, fuck the chains." Jim led him inside, kicking the door closed behind him.
Kane went back down to his basement, tucking himself into bed. As the sun crested over the horizon, he fell asleep behind an unlocked, open door.
-
thank you all for coming with me on 50+ chapters of this journey so far :) i hope you guys like present arc part 2 just as much as you liked part 1! we've got some fun stuff coming up! i know a lot of you have been asking after two things in particular, a kane/bellamy reunion and kane reading jim's book. both of those will be in present arc part 2! as well as a bunch of other fun stuff :)
tune in on saturday for some non-K&J vampire shenanigans, and more K&J (jim recovery arc) on the following tuesday. present arc part 2 will start in august.
taglist in reblog, as usual.
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event: @whumpmasinjuly
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A Precariously Stacked Pile of Random Season 2 Thoughts
These are notes I took as I watched the season. Usually after I’d already posted about the episode in question, and I thought of something I would have added to the post. Rather than edit them into my posts, I’m rounding them up and posting them all at once. As such, they are vaguely chronological. Unfortunately, because I made the notes legible to me and me only, I didn't bother to write down what episode I was referring to. I've also added some notes in as I was editing these notes. So this is also a bit of a scavenger hunt. Enjoy!
Iroh poisoning himself: dumbass moment or 5D chess?
My autocorrect corrects “Sokka” to Sock, and “Sokka’s” to socks. This causes double takes when editing.
Badgermoles have excellent eyeliner. Is that where the Kyoshi Warriors get their jaw dropping cat eye?
Why is Ty Lee spelled Ty Lee and not Tai Li? Why is Dai Li spelled Dai Li and not Dy Lee?
Sometimes Sokka makes me think of Mulan. Am I crazy?
Are the swampbenders’ moves based on a real martial art style too?
Why didn’t Aang use his swamp sense to locate Appa post-appanapping?
Where did Toph, who spent her whole life as a prisoner of her parents’ house and a moonlighting WWE wrestler until Team Avatar busted her out, get such emotional intelligence?
Why did Zuko’s dad put forward the plan to disinherit Iron in favour of him less than 24 hours after Lu Ten’s death? Why did he think that moving quickly was the right approach? Does the Fire Nation not do grieving periods? In what world was 'strike while the iron is hot' the correct course of action here?
Looking back, I’m amazed that season 2 didn’t end in Zuko’s redemption. I didn’t much like Zuko Alone, but I was sure that a season that included that much set up for a Zuko redemption arc would prioritise finishing that arc.
I haven’t even met this Firelord guy yet, but I am peeved that that twerp has a name as cool as Ozai.
Why haven't I met that Firelord guy yet?
I really thought that the older brother character in Zuko Alone would make an appearance later on in the season, giving Zuko a chance to flex some newly acquired morals. But the parallel to Lu Ten and the general message about the evils of war lands better if we never hear of him again.
Zuko in the first half of season 2 had me so annoyed that I was incredibly uncharitable to him in my write ups. Reading through some of the stuff I wrote while watching episodes, I kind of wince now. Zuko in the second half of the season was much less annoying. Which I feel bad for saying, because he’s clearly not in a good place in the second half of the season.
I would love to know why the writers decided to have Toph and Iroh meet in the wilderness. I think it’s a good choice, but I want to know how they came up with it, and why those characters? Is there anything about Toph (especially at that point, when we’ve known her for 1 episode) that suggests that she and Iroh should meet? Or would get along if they did?
Zuko has so many rock bottom fake outs this season: Zuko Alone? Nope, he gets worse in The Chase. The Chase? Nope, he gets worse in Bitter Work. Bitter Work? Nope, he gets worse in the finale.
I’m still peeved that Azula won a 6 on 1 showdown. Sorry, but that breaks immersion.
I bet the Blue Spirit could make lightning.
If water is the element of change, why does the Northern Water Tribe have such strictly defined traditions? I get that it's literally the element of change, in that water can exist in different physical states, but shouldn't the metaphorical interpretation also be true?
I like that Toph can think like an Airbender sooner than Aang can think like an earthbender.
What is Sokka’s boomerang made of? Is it metal? Because if it’s metal, does that mean that there’s a blacksmith somewhere in the South Pole? With a forge?
I still can’t get over how dumb the whole eclipse plot was.
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Suki is TINY!!!
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I mocked this guy’s 80s aerobics video leotard aesthetic, and I stand by that mockery, because this guy is ugly. Those colours are awful. But do you know who else has those colours?
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Jet this season fascinates me. He’s positioned as genuinely repentant and legitimately seeking a second chance and I don’t believe him for one minute. Why don’t I believe him? This show has a theme of learning from mistakes and doing better, so shouldn’t Jet be a perfect fit for this show’s themes? I should be primed to believe him. And yet I don’t.
I have to applaud Iron’s enthusiasm for their new life in Ba Sing Se. A lot of that cheer (at least before the tea shop) is put on for Zuko’s sake. I don’t know where Iroh gets the energy to keep trying with Zuko after years of minimal results, but I’m glad he does.
I think Aang and Ty Lee should hang out. They have similar circus energy. Or maybe it’s that they’re the only two characters in the show so far who are remotely playful.
Aang = surface silliness, core of calm. Not that the silliness doesn't run deep, but he seems to have an untouchable anchor of calm deep within that rarely gets disturbed. Gyatso raised him well.
~~*~~*~~*~~*~~Poetry bouncer ~~*~~*~~*~~*~~
I need next season to have more Appa & Mono subplots à la their escapades in The Swamp. Not à la Momo’s Tale.
Tales of Ba Sing Se definitive ranking: Momo Aang Sokka Zuko Iroh Katara & Toph
I love that Momo still sleeps in the Momo bag from The Blind Bandit
Are Suki and her warriors sitting in the middle of some Earth Kingdom forest in their underwear?
So are Smellerbee and Longshot just done? Will they be back in season 3? What happens to their life now? They are known associates of an enemy of the state who was just executed. It doesn't look good.
Everyone on this show has big ears. Zuko has the smallest ears simply because he has the least amount of ears remaining. But everyone else? Big ears.
Can I have more Gyatso? I forgot how cool he was. More Guru too please.
Hakodilf.
Everyone in the SWT has such wonderfully fluffy hair.
I like Sokka’s boots. Southern Water Tribe boots in general.
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If this is the grand total of the SWT, I have some bad news about population dynamics.
Is there a proper naval term for what the SWT are doing? They’re a stealth strike force that seems to be going after individual enemy ships, using both direct and indirect tactics. Not pirates, because as far as we know they aren't going for FN supplies. They're doing what submarines do, but above water. There’s got to be a proper name for that.
Is there a raft of FN corpses chilling in the waters in front of the NWT's big wall?
I saw ATLA described as a show where all the characters are Asian-inspired people of colour, but isn’t Suki a blue-eyed redhead?
I had no idea that you could decline an Agni Kai. Zuko should have done that.
Why are the Dai Li so in love with Azula? I get that they're pissed with Long Feng for getting arrested, but wouldn't the logical choice be to direct their loyalties to the Earth King rather than a wildcard princess? I'm not going to pretend for a minute that the Dai Li are loyal to the Earth Kingdom or to Ba Sing Se, but the Earth King is a known quantity. Seems to me that it would be easier for them to re-puppetify him, rather than a FN princess.
Katara & Zuko bonding over their missing mothers is the same “makes sense until you think about it for five seconds” as Song & Zuko bonding over losing their fathers to war. Technically the same, sort of, on paper, but actually kind of rude to equate them once you know the full story. Same with the parallel between Lu Ten and the older brother in Zuko Alone. The proper dead mom parallel is Katara and Jet. Although Katara doesn’t object to the Zuko comparison, so I have no grounds to do so.
I’m really glad that Katara didn’t remove Zuko’s scar with her spirit oasis water. Both because she kind of really needed that water, but also because one thing this show has always done right is permanence. No quick fixes, no fake outs, no take backs. Lu Ten is dead, and he stays that way. Princess Yue is the moon, and she stays that way. Half a dozen people’s moms are dead, and they stay that way. Aang is the last Airbender, and he stays that way. Zuko is scarred, and he stays that way. There are no hand waves, no easy fixes. All the characters can do is learn to live with it, and go forward. And I’m grateful the show is like that, because that permanence, as well as being a good lesson to learn, functions as a reward for audience investment.
Aang did come to a crossroads of destiny in the finale, chose his duties to the world over his friends, and got aggressively slapped down for it. I have a feeling that he’ll take the wrong lesson from that, since he was already inclined to shun that path.
Overall Season 1 was prettier.
Ty Lee was the cause of more than one Beat Up Sokka Quota fulfillment this season. Make of that what you will.
Will Zuko & Azula spend season 3 bouncing between the FN and Ba Sing Se? They could be heavily involved with establishing the FN governance over Ba Sing Se, since the city is already inclined towards royalty.
Favourite episode this season? The Guru. The Blind Bandit and The Swamp are tied for second place.
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lavender thread // a curated imodna playlist
I started curating this playlist over two years ago, and it’s still one of my favorite creations because I put arguably way too much thought into it. I soft-launched this a couple weeks ago, and I was genuinely surprised by how many people checked it out.  
It’s in rough chronological order from pre-relationship to post-campaign. Every song goes through a fairly thorough vetting process for thematic appropriateness, accuracy, tone, and genre. For example, if there are too many references to modern technology, days of the week, months, real places, religion, etc., it will likely be cut to build the "world of the story." Imodna playlist, but make it hyperspecific. Like, corpse falling in love with an embalmer specific. (you can find the "rejects" here)
Right now, the playlist is broken into two acts, with a prologue, an epilogue, and a couple of sub-sections sprinkled in. I personally recommend not shuffling, at least on a first listen, so you get to experience the full journey. But hey, I can’t stop you.
This playlist is a constant work in progress. I’ll add new songs I find that feel fitting, and sometimes they live at the bottom of the playlist for a while before I get around to slotting them in. “Dance in the Graveyards” will always be the end of the structured playlist. Rarely, I’ll remove or shuffle a song if I think it doesn’t fit the vibe, the lyrics aren’t specific enough, or it’s just not working. 
I’m making this post to share my playlist with anyone else who might want it and to write down my reasoning for every song so I don’t forget it. It’ll be updated as new songs get added. Enjoy!
I laid out my reasoning for each song mostly for my own benefit. You'll see the "section," song title, artist, a little blurb from me, and one/two of my favorite or the most relevant sections of the song. Sometimes, I just had to pick something because the whole song was perfect.
Prologue: 
“Stories” - Lilli Furfaro
It’s a beautiful framing device. It’s the premise of the game, the world, the show, and the characters. Fun fact: I found this song two full years before I learned she made a whole Vox Machina album lol.
“We are stories / Bеginnings, middles, ends / Our power lies in living lives that touch a life or two [...] / In this world we’ve built on games of chance / And hours of introspection”
ACT 1
Laudna, Before:
A general note: I looked for songs that were just slightly off-putting with darker over and undertones to match Laudna’s energy.
“Old Churchyard” - The Wailin’ Jennys
Welcome to the world. Foreshadowing and a set-up for the downfall of Whitestone. Speaks to the exhaustion. I imagine a tiny Laudna being ever so hopeful that it might get better but embracing the eeriness of a graveyard in the meantime.
“I rest in the hope that one bright day / Sunshine will burst through these prisons of clay / And the trumpets will sound on the hills near and far / Will wake up the dead in the old churchyard”
“Funeral Bell” - PHILDEL
The aftermath of the banquet. The fear, sadness, and resignation. The sense of relief. 
“Oh mother, I’m scared to die. / Where, where do my good deeds lie? / Oh father, I’m scared to live, / Takes more than I’ve got to give.”
“Apple Tree” - Marika Hackman
Hanging from the tree. A crowd gathering. Wanting to be remembered. Enough said. 
“Here I hang for the sated crowd / To look upon my eyes, look upon my mouth / And say, ‘We were there that day / I saw a face, heard a sound’”
“Special Death” - Mirah
Asking, “Why me?” A sense of confusion and loss along with the saving of Whitestone. Concludes with the beginnings of the la-la-las. 
“But it's a special death you saved / For me, the brown-eyed daughter”
“Ain’t No Grave (Sparse)” - Crooked Sill, Aoife O’Donovan
It’s a little on the nose, yes, but I chose this version specifically for the sense of emptiness it evokes. There’s an implied skepticism of seeing people you think you’re able to trust, specifically “gods’ people” (as I’m choosing to interpret it), and thinking of the clerics who saw a monster. The dismay of being resurrected into a world that hates you. We’ll see if this one sticks; it’s a little heavy on references to Christianity.
“Ain't no grave gonna hold my body down / When I hear that trumpet sound / I'm gonna get up out of the ground”
“Don’t Know Who I Am” - Rebecca Roubion
The distinct loss of identity and a surprisingly apt description. Laudna had no name and no sense of self or what she was. She’s searching for something to identify.  
“Black tears on my shirt / Black tears on my freckles / I've been stung by this hurt / I've been stung by a stinging nettle”
“Lying Beast” - Run River North
Running. Running far and fast, leaving home behind. Seeing herself as a beast and being terrified of it. So alone. 
“And so I flew away with myself / I was the beast all alone in my hell!”
“Drinking Song” - House Phone
What could she have become if she hadn’t been murdered so soon? We see her begin to play and fantasize and dream and grow. 
“'Cause you won't rewrite history / To commemorate the likes of me / And you would not believe me if I tried / To tell you all the things I've seen / And all the places that I've been”
“Mile Magnificent” - molly ofgeography
Starting to explore her magic and Delilah’s influence in her head. It starts to feel... good? The pent-up frustration and anger have a release.
“We bloom beneath the blessings of a goddess with no face [...] / All my better demons have gone the way they came”
“Stolen Roses” - Karen Elson
Digging into the anger, searching for a purpose. Too old and too young at the same time, forced to grow up too fast. 
“There once was a time when I was a girl / That darkness hung in my sky / I was old before I learned to be young / Stone cold till I learn how to cry”
“These Bones” - Azrai (ft. Momo O’brien)
Searching for a home, a place to rest. Crossing the sea to Marquet. (The intro, as you’ll hear, foreshadows the pluckier sound of Imogen’s section.) Skeletal imagery. 
“I am a long time finding home / I have only ever wandered before / It′s a savage sea we're made to roam / Every tide can turn to haunt us / But the ocean reaches past these ghosts / And I will always sail for more” 
“Mountain Song” - Little Chief
A beautiful, adventurous musical introduction. Open to the possibility of new things, still weary, but there’s more here. 
“I’ve been living in a hole in the mountain / Ain’t no sins in there / Oh, these memories they keep on following”
This is our transition into...
Imogen, Before:
A general note: I tried to seek out songs with more of a folky-bluegrass vibe for Imogen to match her background. 
“Second Child, Restless Child” - The Oh Hellos
I imagine a very young, carefree Imogen. Well before her powers kicked in. I like to think she thought she was a bit of a troublemaker, but anything she did was so endearing and mild that it was sweet. A happy kid with big dreams until the signs of something else started to appear. 
“With a spirit running wild, running free / And they saw trouble in my eyes / They were quick to recognize the devil in me”
“I’ve Endured” - Tim O’Brien
Growing up with her father in the mountains and in the fields. The nightmares begin. But this is fine, right? She can handle this. 
“I've seen the lightnin' flashin', I heard the thunder roll / I've endured, I've endured / How long must one endure?”
“Wander. Wonder.” - The Arcadian Wild
The powers are coming on strong. Post-nightmares and in pain, nothing she did was good enough. She felt trapped in her own home, shackled by her mind and father, perhaps, as she tried not to let on that she was changing.
“Half awake I wander through this house / Lost in a labyrinth and left with no way out / I built this hall of mirrors all myself / Faces staring back at me look like somebody else”
“Lost in My Mind” - The Head And The Heart
Everything is So Much. Thoughts of leaving but–
“Momma once told me / ‘You're already home where you feel loved,’ / I am lost in my mind / I get lost in my mind”
“Trouble and Woe” - Ruth Moody
The voices are awful, and the world is so bleak. People are cruel. Getting worse, and hoping it will get better. 
“This world is full of trouble and woe / All I see is trouble, everywhere I go”
“Little Bird” - The Weepies
People have noticed. Trips to town are much harder. The voices are louder. 
“Sometimes it's hard to say even one thing true / When all eyes have turned aside, they used to talk to you / And people on the streets seem to disapprove / So you keep moving away”
“Storm Comin’” - The Wailin’ Jennys
It’s getting worse. Nightmares getting more frequent. Control is slipping. And, you might notice this song is by the same artist as Laudna’s first. I do love a bit of symbolism. 
“Will you listen to that thunder roar and let your spirits soar / When that love calls, open up your door [...] / No, don’t run from the coming storm, ‘cause it can’t keep a storm from coming.”
This leads us to…
Connection
General note: a blending of both genres and styles. 
“Mostly” - Vian Izak, Juniper Vale
A prelude, almost. Are you real?
“I've bought up all my dreams and sold off most my heart / I'd been lying to myself just to bury all my thoughts”
“Maybe” - The Henry Girls
The timid hope of meeting someone and realizing you feel like you’ve known them all your life. Suddenly, things might be okay.
“I feel like I should know you / I feel like we have met before [...] / And all these things that I don't really understand / Would be much simpler if you'd only hold my hand”
“Dandelion” - Heather Maloney
A moment of peace. I like to think of this as Laudna’s adoration of the natural world and its beauty. Her will to bend the laws of the world to give Imogen what she deserves. And, on a more literal level, to offer Imogen the gift of flowers because Laudna has little else to her name. This song also begins the recurring flowers-in-hair motif.
“I have nothing but these weathered hands / And I live nowhere on this wild land”
“Rain Clouds” - The Arcadian Wild
A connection over shared struggles from both sides. A mutual agreement of trust. 
“I’m being frightened by the people / They look at me like I’m a scar upon their perfect skin / Perfect to only them / I’m being shadowed by my past / Reminding me of what I was and what I could become” 
“Daylight” - Watchhouse
Realizing that this person might’ve saved you. 
“My search was unending, and my soul was bare. And darling you came to me like a midnight flare.”
“The Devil In You” - The Haunted Windchimes
The joy of being seen. Of being known. 
“I've walked a long long way it ain't new / Here I sit face to face with the devil in you / It looks a lot like someone I've spoken to / We were broken together it's true”
“Curses” - The Crane Wives
The fear that neither is good enough for the other. Basic choice? Maybe. But it’s too good to pass up. 
"Every word I say is kindling / But the smoke clears when you're around / Won't you stay with me, my darling / When my walls start burning down, down, down?”
“Wildflowers” - The Wailin’ Jennys
You deserve better. You deserve the world, and I can’t give that to you. The feeling that this is too good to be true. Surely, it can’t last. 
“Go away somewhere bright and new / I have seen no other / That compares with you”
“Bruised Feet” - Haunted Like Human
Laudna’s invitation to leave. Together. An escape from mistakes and the past. 
“Do you want to hear the stories these bruised feet could tell / ‘Cause I’ve been chasing sunrises, throwing change in wishing wells / And I’m running to and I’m running from and oh Lord knows that I ain’t done / Running for the sake of running wild, so come with me child”
Unless...
ACT 2
On the Road
“Light in the Sky” - We Banjo 3
And they’re off on a search for knowledge and freedom. 
“So if you’re lost in the night / Stuck between the demon and the knife / As it traces a line across your heart”
“Apple Pie” - Lizzie McAlpine
Transient, finding solace in one another. Home after home. How long can this last? This one has a few more references to modern things than I’d like, but I can’t pass up the vibes. 
“Every house looks the same in my dreams / Every house feels like home for a couple weeks / I've been runnin' 'round trying to find a place where I can breathe...Home is wherever you are tonight.”
“Almost Home” - Keston Cobblers Club
In search of a person, a place to settle. As long as they’re together. 
“The clouds will break the wind will brace these sails of stone / And I have never known a journey take this long / But I'm almost home”
“You and Me” - You+Me
They fit together. 
“They say everything, it happens for a reason / You can be flawed enough but perfect for a person / Someone who will be there for you when you fall apart / Guiding your direction when you're riding through the dark”
“Witchcraft” - Vian Izak
I like to think Imogen is... realizing some things, and getting attached. (We all know she fell first.)
“It's witchcraft / And I've got no defense for it / The heat is too intense for it / What good would common sense for it do?”
“For My Emablmer” - Emily June
Laudna’s turn. Still seeing herself as a dead thing, a little confused by Imogen’s friendship but embracing it all the same.
“I hope you know I won't complain / If I decompose and you're to blame / Abandon your duties, lay down next to me / Grab my hand, feel no shame”
“Home to Me” - The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea
Keep coming back to each other regardless of what other people think.
“How dare you love me like you've never known fear / You've got more troubles than minutes in the year / And a voice like your father's tells you nothing good's for free / Well, that may be / But you're walking home to me”
“The Moon Song” - Brittin Lane, Mitchel Morse
Foreshadowing the importance of the moon later. For now, it’s peaceful. 
“We're lying on the moon / It's a perfect afternoon / Your shadow follows me all day / Making sure that I'm okay”
“You Are My Sunshine” - Lena Hall
Contrasting the last song, when the moon becomes too much… there’s the sunshine. Specifically for Imogen constantly fighting the pull of the moon, Laudna is the sun, her spark, her light. What happens if she disappears?
“As I lay sleeping / I dreamed I held you / In my arms / When I awoke, dear / I was mistaken” 
“Two” - Sleeping At Last
These two self-sacrificial, loyal, dedicated characters. Bonus points for “I will love you without any strings attached.” A double meaning for Laudna and Delilah.
“No, I don't want to talk about myself / Tell me where it hurts / I just want to build you up, build you up / Till you're good as new”
The Campaign
“Growing Up” - Run River North
Apt for both of them as they come into their own. Growing together as they explore the world, adventure with their friends, and learn to take what comes.
“I used to close my eyes / To what stirred under my bed / Now, they're open wide / To the monsters in my head / Instead of claws, they whisper lies”
“I found my way without your help / With broken family / I'll take my breaks with my sins / Do as I do, please / With my friends 'til the end / There lies my loyalty”
“Anything Can Happen” - Tors
Imogen is being pulled. 
“But even when I start to dream / Every little piece of me / Gets a little close to the edge of darkness / I know I've been here before / Long as I'm not falling off / I'll be fine”
“Crawl In” - Upstate
Things are getting harder, but they’re seeking comfort in each other after nightmares and bad days alike. 
“Crawl in my head tonight / Read my thoughts so I don't have to speak / It's been a long, long week but I'm tryin’ / To make do and stop fussin’ and fightin’”
“Bottom of the River” - Delta Rae
The crickets chirping continue the nightmare-ish theme of the last song. However. Shit’s getting real. Holding onto each other as they sink deeper. 
“Hold my hand / Ooh it’s a long way down”
“Raise Hell” - Brandi Carlile
Can’t believe Laura Bailey beat me to this song by 2 days with her Imogen playlist. It’s the perfect mix of angsty and bluegrass-folky. Being born cursed and learning your strengths. May or may not stick because of the substantial references to Christianity, but I do love it for Imogen coming into her god-like power.
“It came upon a lightning strike / And eyes of bright clear blue”
"I'll Bend But I Won't Break" - Red Moon Road
First of all, could that band name be any more perfect? Second, this song is such a good tribute to Imogen's character. The tempo is quick; the drums like rolling thunder; and allusions to dreams, storms, the dark. "Still I will endure" calls back to the second song in Imogen's section, "I'll Endure," and "Still in the eye of the hurricane" is both great storm imagery and foreshadows "Hurricane" which is a song further down the playlist. I imagine this during Otohan Round 1, but it may shift around the playlist depending on how I feel about the flow.
"Lighting lights the sky like it's looking for me / Flashes of the forces the dark has set free / Thunder strikes the land / With the mighty heavy hand / It rocks me to my core / I won't fall down / I'll stand my ground / I'll bend but I won't break"
“Bury Me Smiling” - The Ballroom Thieves
Laudna’s second death. Love and loss. 
“I stood in silence / A mind's worth of violence / Strung me a short rope / Round my neck / A love like an old home / Breathes in these dry bones”
“Afterlife” - Haunted Like Human
Laudna on Imogen’s desperate search to get her back. Asking Imogen not to waste her time. The choice to return. I particularly love the chimes. Musical thoughts and the reflection of death. 
“So darling don’t go digging up graves / When love is lost the afterlife is a choice you gotta make / So put the nails in the coffin, let them rust in place / But darling don’t go digging up graves”
“The Mountain Song (First Dance Version)” - Tophouse
The “I would do anything for you” of it all. Resurrection. Hope. Bonus points for flower-in-hair motif.
“Well the clouds rolled in / There was lightning there was thunder there was rain / As we hid beneath our shelter / All the doubts that we had felt / Came pouring in as a flood we had to face”
“Flowers in My Hair” - Wes Reeve
Yearning. A bit of good old fashioned wanting what can’t be had. I imagine this is the last of the first Whitestone visit and the orange tree is the golden glow of the sun tree. Whitestone Andy mention? Continuing flower motif. 
“I had a dream of a boy who loved me and / We danced in the leaves of an orange tree [...] / Then I went my own way, and you crossed the highway / But just maybe someday we’ll be, my pretty”
“Haven” - We Banjo 3
The Rudius arc is kicking into gear. “You have the biggest spark of anyone I’ve ever seen” vibes. 
“The moonlight's a path we can travel down / River runs wild with what has gone before / Cast aside for new and more and more and more and more and more and more / Let me be your haven / Let me be your light”
Moon Arc
“Wax & Wane” - Alana Henderson
Oooh tension. The drama. The moon is affecting the relationship. We’re starting to see a shift to a darker mood around the Solstice and all that’s around it. Mirrors “Moon Song” - “There’s nothing I’d keep from you.” Oh yeah?
“But we bent and we broke and I meant what I spoke / And the blame game does not produce a winner / We went as far as we could go we had to go that far to know / That we had nowhere left to aim / And no one left to blame but / The moon’s wax and wane and the turn of the tide”
“The Moon Will Sing” - The Crane Wives
This reminds me of Laudna during the separation and immediately after, starting to question everything, seeing herself as dark. That extreme co-reliance. Clinging to each other. Is it a good thing? Laudna starting to lean back into Delilah’s burn. 
“The moon will sing a song for me / I loved you like the sun / Bore the shadows that you made / With no light of my own / I shine only with the light you gave me [...] / I want to feel the fire that you kept from me”
“Always You” - South for Winter
The rush of reunion. The high-pitched start, disbelief. Then: the warmth of returning to Your Person. Being able to rely on them. A bright spot. 
“Should the blood red tides run o’er / Should our nightmares all come true / Should we lose this holy war / I know there’ll still be you [...] Oh my love / The skies are growing colder / Oh, my love / I need you more than ever”
“Tether Me” - Galleaux
In addition to the obvious tether relation, they’re both feeling pulls in different directions: Imogen to the red dawn; Laudna to the darkness of her mind. Being tied to her limbs earns you more puppet symbolism. 
“For a moment, I was gone /  The speed of light into the red dawn / In this space, do I belong?/ It’s dark out here in my own thoughts / Pull me back out of my body / I’m tied to my limbs”
“Blood Moon” - Saint Sister
The moon sure is tempting. The pulls for both of them are getting stronger. Things are getting darker, harder, more intense. 
“And so I wonder will those scattered pits / Take root behind your cracking lips / They are always doing that [...] / The hunter’s moon was bleeding red / The night you left our thorny bed / You were always, always”
“If We Were Vampires” - Baggio & Hannah Kol
The looming sense that one of them won’t come back. As the end draws near, even if the upcoming fights don’t kill one of them, Imogen will out–age Laudna. 
“It's knowing that this can't go on forever / Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone / Maybe we'll get forty years together / But one day I'll be gone or one day you'll be gone”
“Hesitate” - The Harmaleighs
They’re hiding things from each other as the tension builds. 
“You keep saying you love me / You keep telling me you’re proud / But you don't know who I am / 'Cause you're not even living out loud”
“Soothsayer” - Haunted Like Human
Not gonna lie this is my favorite song on the entire playlist. It is peak Laudna-Delilah. I would quote the entire song if I could. It’s dark, thematically perfect, and haunting. It's also by the same artist as "Afterlife," Laudna's "death" song to reflect that link. I imagine this is late C3 as Laudna continues to feed Delilah. My favorite line: “The thing that you hate / Is the thing you've become.”
“There's a price to be paid / But ain't that every trade? / You're just looking for strength when you're weak / Oh you know there's a flickering darkness / And it sings out like sirens to you / Yea it's sickly sweet and elegantly violent / But these debts that you take / They will someday come due / Hungry hands reaching up / Crave for more, lust for blood”
“Hurricane” - Bandits on the Run
While still being them having to navigate their relationship in the midst of the impending end of the world, this song brings to light Imogen’s relationship with her mother, too. She meets her mother in the storm. 
“They told us run for cover / Stay close to home and mother / Don’t seek out any other”
“Chasing Twisters” - Delta Rae
It’s time. Make or break. 
“I was born with lighting in my heels / Sewed a spur onto my ankle / Bit a horse under the steel / And I lost hope when I was still so young [...] / I’ll take you to the grave / The only love I’ve ever known / The only soul I ever saved / And I went home”
Epilogue
At the time of writing, we’re around C3:E95, so from here on out this is even more so my reinterpretation or guesses about the future. I’m hoping to flesh out this section and the middle/end of Act 2. 
“Oh Mama” - honeyhoney
Our transition song. The cacophonous high of the last song into the unbelieving stillness of the piano, the end of a battle. The world has shifted. There’s no going back. 
“All covered in mud the day is done [...] / Oh mama look at my heart / I’m useless now that it’s dark / We’re praying for rain a thunder of change / And lightning to lighten my way”
“If She Ever Leaves Me” - The Highwomen
Alright, this one’s a little self-indulgent, even more so than the others. But don’t we deserve a little wholesome “we made it” energy? 
“I’ve loved her in secret / I’ve loved her out loud / The sky hasn’t always been blue [...] / She loves wild horses and tumbling dice”
“The Time for Flowers” - Emily Scott Robinson
The bookend and parallel to “Dandelion” from much, much earlier. This time, from Imogen’s perspective. Conclusion and continuation of flowers motif. “The skies are clear now. The moon is new.”
“I came upon a woman in a field on her knees / Singing ancient songs and sowing wildflower seeds / Tell me what the point in planting pretty things / In these days of darkness and disease [...] I have witnessed funerals and wars / Worried mothers, empty shelves, and empty stores / The storms will rage and the winds will blow / You are gonna find out that you're stronger than you know”
“Dance in the Graveyards” - Delta Rae
I always knew I was going to end the playlist with this song. It perfectly mirrors “Old Churchyard,” the first of Laudna’s songs. It's also by the same artist as the "climax" of the playlist. The drums give me Laudna, while the folksy sound gives me Imogen. Finding joy in death, in life, in love. Life will go on, new friends and old will come and go. And that’s alright. She’s happy. They’re happy. 
“When I die, I don’t wanna rest in peace / I wanna dance in joy / I wanna dance in the graveyards, the graveyards / And while I’m alive, I don’t wanna be alone / Mourning the ones who came before”
If you're listening to the playlist on a loop, you'll return to "Stories." It reminds us that it was all just a story. It will happen again. Stories and characters and people will move us, make us feel and hurt and love. It is an ending just as much as a new beginning.
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v0rewhxre · 3 months
Note
Heyy could you write abt how Noah would be having a gf/partner with past trauma/ SA trauma and how he would help with that? No worries if not I get it’s triggering <3
Hello! I can write this, but this content may be triggering for folks to read! I am only writing this because I am someone who has personally gone through past trauma/SA trauma. I'll write this more as a head cannon.
I will not be going into full detail of types of trauma. I will be writing entirely from my experiences in my own personal relationships from the past or things I wished I had in relationships.
18+ MDNI
CW: [Mentions of past trauma and SA trauma, mentions of emotional distress due to past traumas, mentions of relationship strife due to past traumas, conversations may be distressing as well, mentions of sex and sexual relations]
This isn't in chronological order I'm sorry :)
This is also all I can write cause I do not/will not make up experiences I haven't had surrounding trauma/SA. These are very personalized things I needed in relationships/I have experienced in my relationships related to my trauma. This may not apply to you and/or your trauma
Noah is extremely supportive with your therapy and things you do for your mental wellness. He often buys you expensive journals and fancy pens to keep up with your journaling. He will drive you to therapy and wait for you (when he's home from touring). He will research ways to support you in his own time too, making sure that he approaches everything in a trauma-informed way.
The relationship moved very slowly. It took you a lot of time to trust Noah, you didn't even kiss until the 4th date! But that was ok! Noah was so in love with you the minute he met you, he moved at the pace you wanted and needed. He saw parts of himself in you, realizing that you had a lot of lived experience in life and that there was the good and the bad. He was just as patient with you as you were with him.
The first time you had a panic attack was really scary. You freaked out when Noah touched you in a way that caused you to have a flashback. At first Noah freaked out, unsure what to do, but then he slowly realized you were having a panic attack. He sat with you, holding your hand and taking deep breaths. He asked you what worked best for you in those moments, offering snacks and water if you needed. He just sat with you, which no one had every done. Just being there for you made you realize how in love you were with Noah.
Now Noah is a pro at panic attacks. He can sense them coming on, he has categorized all your triggers in his mind. He knows when they are about to happen, helping you remove yourself from situations when you can. Although, a few still surprise you both and he's there holding your hand. He places kisses on your forehead when you want, sometimes he even shares some of his meditation techniques he's learned for his own.
You don't always share what is going on, internalizing things deeply. This sometimes comes from a place of trust, other times because you don't want to burden him. It can be hard when you have so much going on internally, and Noah has so much going on externally.
When you shared what happened to you for the first time, it broke him. How could anyone hurt you the way those people did? He listened intently, only asking questions he deemed comfortable for you. He didn't want to ask anything too intense at first. Over time you did share the details he had wondered about, conscious that it was something you needed to share and not something he should ask. He listened to you and when it came time for him to share, he made sure you were also ready to receive his trauma story.
Noah also has significant trauma. And sometimes he has the same reactions or the same issue you do in the relationship. This can lead to a lot of fights or contention, but at the end of the day you both try to understand each other.
Noah tries to fix you sometimes and it drives you crazy! He comes from a good place, only wanting you to be ok, but it's not always helpful. You have to explain to him that sometimes he just needs to listen and be there rather than trying to fix everything.
You have an extremely hard time trusting Noah because of your experiences with your ex-boyfriend. This has led to you constantly asking if he's cheating on you, where he was Friday night, why his texts came in late. You were weary when his moods were off and often times you were stubborn in believing him, even when he was telling the truth.
The first time you had sex was hard. Being so vulnerable with someone after being violated was hard. Being able to trust him enough to be naked, alone in a room was really intense emotionally. It took a few times to fully have sex with each other. Noah never made you feel bad about anything, he took things slowly. He always looked in your eyes to make sure something was ok, he didn't overtly ask because he didn't want to put you on spot either. The experience was very emotional for you, but also very liberating. You were taking your body back, you felt sexy and beautiful for the first time in a long time. You cried in Noah's arms after sex, Noah rubbing small circles over your lower back.
When he doesn't want to have sex, you take it extremely personally and have a hard time believing that he still loves you. Sometimes when he's extremely horny, you take that personally as well. Thinking he only wants you for sex.
*************************************************
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nanowrimo · 2 years
Text
Making Time: 5 Ways Writers Prepare for Success With Timelines
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Every year, we’re lucky to have great sponsors for our nonprofit events. Aeon Timeline, a 2022 NaNoWriMo sponsor, is a visual hub for your entire story. NaNoWriMo writers can try out a free trial of Aeon Timeline through December 15! In this post, the folks at Aeon share a few ways that making a timeline for your novel can help your story:
If you are like me your story has been gnawing inside you for months. An intriguing premise; a character to explore; a surprise twist; a cliffhanger ending—something is telling you that you are the person to write this story.
Yet every year, only one in ten Wrimos make it to the end. Over 200,000 promising novels are abandoned—typically in the sticky middle stages.
At Aeon Timeline, we believe that visual planning with timelines can bring purpose to your writing, add depth to your characters, and sustain your creative energy until the end.
With help from authors David Williams and Andrew Hanson, let’s look at why so many stories fail in the middle stages, and the planning you can do now to avoid those mid-novel traps.
1. Steer your story in the right direction
Writing a novel any time is tough; finishing one in a month is crazy. To get to the finish line, you need to make sure every scene is pulling in the right direction. 
I find it easier to maintain momentum when I have the lure of a compelling climax to write towards. Creating this sense of direction is what building a visual story timeline is all about.
Don’t worry: 50,000 words provides abundant room for creativity. Planning a few signposts won’t change that, but it will make writing less stressful.
“I like to write fast and I like to write loose. Aeon Timeline allows me to do more of that, because it encourages me to be spontaneous in the space in-between. It’s actually going to enhance your creativity, and give you more freedom.”
– David Williams
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2. Perfect your pacing with the right time frame
We writers talk a lot about setting, but stories live in time as much as they live in space. Time is crucial to controlling pace and tension.
Ask yourself:
What is the chronology of my story? What are the key moments and when do they need to happen?
What if I compressed my timeline? Would it increase tension, and force my characters to act impulsively? Or do my characters need more time to grow?
You could use pen and paper, but using a digital timeline encourages you to freely experiment and find new possibilities:
"Looking at this on the timeline, I thought, that's actually the beginning and end of the story. I’ve taken 20-odd years of information, and reframed it around a single weekend. Just the freedom to be able to throw these events around made me realize I had been getting it entirely wrong.”
– David Williams
3. Cultivate characters with purpose
You determine every choice for your characters, but you want them to bring their own goals and motive to every scene. To pull off this magic trick, each character’s stakes need to be high enough that they can’t simply walk away.
To ensure authentic choices, it helps to build thorough backstories for your characters and your world. What recent events instigated your story? How are they compelling your characters into action? Which historical scars and social pressures provoke their reactions in each scene?
By plotting these histories visually, you can cross reference personal and world events—prompting fresh insights about your characters.
“I start with the characters, and then flesh out the backstory events to make sure that the story logic makes sense. By story logic, I really mean that the events leading up to the present day of the story make sense to the reader.”
– Andrew Hanson
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4. Amplify tension throughout your middle chapters
The first quarter of your book is done—your characters have taken that first irreversible step. The final chapters are whispering to you with the siren call of crisis and resolution.
But first, you have half a novel to increase stakes and layer pressure on your characters. That is a lot of empty space to fill with complications that don’t feel repetitive or contrived. You can drop another dead body, but can you really drop five?
It is easy to see why so many stories are abandoned in the middle. Why not plan your escalations in advance, while you have time to experiment and your story feels fresh?
If a better idea strikes while writing, that’s great! But if it doesn’t, your story timeline can keep you on solid ground: 
“The timeline is my barometer of story. It gives me an idea of where the pressure points are in a story, whether the story is working or not. It’s my eyes and ears on the story.”
– Andrew Hanson
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5. Plan scenes as agents of change
We have all stumbled on that one scene that doesn’t want to be written. You can’t wait to throw yourself at the next crisis point, if you could just get that one scene right. But until then… Everything. Just. Stops.
Often, this block is surprisingly simple: your scene isn’t doing anything:
“The most important thing that every single scene has to have is change — external plot change or internal character change, but ideally both. If I am struggling with the writing of a scene, I can go into Aeon Timeline and fill in the details to work out where the scene has gone wrong.
– Andrew Hanson
Aeon Timeline is a flexible visual hub for planning your entire story. You can find detailed case studies describing how David and Andrew use Aeon Timeline on our website.
Download a free trial on Mac, Windows and iOS.  Discounts are available to all NaNoWriMo participants until December 15. To claim, log into your NaNoWriMo account and visit the Offers page.
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When We Are Together - Matty Blurb
Author's Note: Just a little something to tie you over whilst I try and spring some creativity from my brain and write my new Matty piece. A little blurb that stems from the When We Are Together imagine. p.s If you would like to discuss the playlist, I know some of them might not make sense, but I can tell you my reasonings behind picking the songs etc just send me an ask! Enjoy! x
Warnings: None really. Use of the word fuck if you'd like to be warned!
762 words
When We Are Together
Since finally getting with Matty, you had been essentially been MIA from anyone that didn’t have direct contact with you. Luckily for you, you were essentially shagging the boss so it didn’t really matter if you were late for work or not because he was the one who was making you late in the first place.
Your eagerness to always want to just be on him was easily accepted by Matty because the desire to have his way with you was constant. Much to your brother’s dismay but he kept his mouth shut because he had already given you his blessing but it didn’t stop you catching him looking at you like he wanted to gorge his own eyes out whenever he caught the two of you with your hands all over each other even if it was innocent.
The two of you were sat together on the sofa in the rehearsal room. The boys preparing for an upcoming performance on The Jonathan Ross Show. The boys out on a cigarette break/coffee run whilst the two of you sat intwined as he pottered about on his laptop. Your head on his shoulder, his hands rubbing soft circles into your thigh that were draped across him when a thought popped into your head causing you to sit up suddenly.
“Everything alright darling?”
“You said you’ve been writing songs about me for over a decade.”
“Yeah of course I have. I’ve been in love with you since I was 17 years old.” He laughed against your temple as he pressed a kiss to it.
“Can you tell me? Seeing as I’m such a muse for you rockstar!” You smirked pressing a kiss to his lips.
“I can show you, if you like? I’ve got a Spotify playlist.” Matty chuckled as he turned his laptop in your direction before passing it over to you.
You looked at his open Spotify profile for a moment before turning back to your boyfriend. “Am I supposed to guess which playlist I’m listening to or are you going to give me a clue Healy?”  You cocked an eyebrow at him playfully causing him to roll his eyes at you.
Reaching over you, Matty scrolled through his playlists before landing on one. Your breath immediately got stuck in your throat as you caught sight of the four word title.
‘Love of my Life’
Your eyes flitted to him for a millisecond before turning back to the playlist. Your hand flying to your mouth as you tried to process the information. “It’s in chronological order too.” Matty whispered, squeezing your thigh. You would have laughed if you weren’t so overcome with emotion as you read all the songs that you had inspired. You really were intertwined with every era of this band without realising.
Fallingforyou
Settle Down
This Must Be My Dream
I couldn’t Be More in Love
Be My Mistake
Tonight I wish I was your Boy
You and Me Together Song
Oh Caroline
All I need To Hear
When We Are Together
I’m in Love With You
Happiness
About You
“Seriously?”
You managed to choke out. Your eyes glossy as you turned to look back at him. He nodded. “But Fallingforyou came out like a million years ago!” You laughed through the sob that had erupted from your chest before falling against your boyfriend. 
“I told you, I’ve been in love with you for forever.”  
Which just made you cry even more.
Then the boys returned, your brother leading the troops. Two cups in his hand, your fave coffee order ready for the long day of band stuff they had ahead of them when he spotted you crying in Matty’s arms.
“Dude why the fuck is my sister crying? What the fuck have you done Healy?”
The anger bubbling in him, thinking he had hurt you in some way. Not wanting a fight to break out, you pulled away from Matty, sleeves of shirt wet from where you’d try to contain the emotions that were spilling out of you. When you finally felt composed enough to converse with Ross, he was already on his knees in front of you ready to comfort you. You reached out to hold his bearded cheek sweetly.
“He’s done nothing. He was just showing me this.” 
Dropping your hand, you turned the laptop round to show him what had made you so emotional. Your heart physically bursting from how much you loved this stupid curly haired man sat next to you. The two of you watched your brother flit his eyes across the playlist of songs before his eyes landed on you wide.
“Seriously? This entire time?”
Matty just smiled.
“The entire time.”
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emmettland · 15 days
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when the guidebook comes out or if you feel like it. would you have advise about how to make one? like for my own ocs world.
The way you explain world building for your stories and aus is wonderful! plus I can understand the lore in them quite well when reading them.
however understanding my own words building or lore is more of a challenge for me.
I struggle a bit with wording the information in ways I myself am confused by and feel it'd confused others to. Especially stuff contrasting something else or a new thing gets added.
thank you! i'm glad that it's easy to understand. <3 and i would be more than happy to give advice. if you'd be comfortable sharing your own guide book document if/when you start it, i'd also offer to be your editor if you wanted feedback from a reader's perspective.
so i won't go into formatting here because there are a lot of different ways you can format a guide book, but you said that you're worried about the information being confusing. here are some things i would suggest based on my own past mistakes and my perspective when reading other people's OC information.
don't add too much info all in once place. for a clear, concise summary of information, adding too much info will make things confusing and hard to read. i used to think that i had to cut in with context for every little thing, but over time i realized it was better to stick to one or two main points in a given paragraph and then expand upon the things needing context in a separate paragraph. so what do i mean by too much info? something like this: "The hierarchy from bottom to top is Greenies (Greens who are still going through their Basics), Greens (Greenies who have graduated their Basics), True Greens (Greens who have children for their Golds/Goldens), Golds (the ring fighters), Goldens (the ring leaders), and the Gods (Goldens who have ascended via ritualistic suicide)." all of those parentheses contain context, but putting all that in the same sentence bounces the focus away from the main point: the hierarchy. this is how i would write it now: "The hierarchy from bottom to top is Greenies, Greens, True Greens, Golds, Goldens, and the Gods." and then i would expand upon each one in a separate paragraph, where the focus can be on that specific rank and how it fits into the hierarchy.
be conscious of your fantasy vocab. this is moreso a general worldbuilding tip, but it goes into the whole 'being easy to understand' thing. i can't tell you how many times i've struggled to understand someone's lore or just lost interest because every single word was replaced with a word they made up for their story, or there were a bunch of made up new words that i struggled to remember. i get it, especially if you're using fantasy, sci-fi, or futuristic settings (G/G is one of them), but if you need to consult The Fantasy Glossary before reading someone's lore, imo it's not a great way to motivate them to read. using my own lore as an example: the G/G AU does replace certain words, like using drops instead of stars and Dim and Glisten for night and day. greft is their form of birth control. but most of our words still apply to G/G. they sleep on beds with pillows, they use knives and swords as weapons, etc. the only times i replace it with a fantasy word are if i don't believe our concept applies to the Gelion version, or if it's something with particular significance -- i.e., a sacred or blessed sword may have a special fantasy name.
organization matters. if i'm explaining the stigma against Reformed Greens, i would probably need to explain what Reformation is first before i get into the effects of it. it's important to organize your info in a way that makes sense to someone who isn't in your head -- they don't know what Reformation is until i define it, and then i can go into further detail. it may also help to organize your thoughts based on chronological order; the G/G guidebook starts with Earth's downfall, then the slow reconstruction that leads to Gelion, and ends with modern day Gelion. or you could choose another means of organization, like maybe you want to go by specific character, country, tribe, magic type -- whatever big thing that you can group little things under, and all of those little things will be the bulk of your information. and though i said i wouldn't get into formatting, headlines, categories, bullet points, and even color coding can all help with organization! i guarantee you, if someone's sending me their OC lore, i would much rather see THIS--
Backstory
(Brief introduction to character.)
Childhood
(A few paragraphs about character's childhood.)
Teenage Years
(A few paragraphs about character's teenage years.)
Adulthood
(A few paragraphs about character's adulthood.)
--than either a wall of text or a bunch of unlabeled paragraphs. (and please, no walls of text. always indent your text. i will flat out refuse to read something if it's not indented because my eyes will mix up the lines of text and i'll get a headache.)
i hope that helps! always feel free to any questions. :3
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waitmyturtles · 1 year
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Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: Love Sick/Love Sick 2 Edition
[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. I’ve covered SOTUS so far, but now I’m correcting for chronology, and present to you today my review of Love Sick.]
Well. I climbed the mountain and saw the view from the top. After 48 episodes -- BL edit cuts, mind you, but still, 48 episodes -- I finished Love Sick and Love Sick 2. 
Before I dive into the review, I want to meditate on something that kept cropping up for me as I was watching the show. I always say this in my writing, but I’m an #old cishet gal, in my early middle-aged years, and when I was in high school in the States, casual homophobia likely looked different than it does now, or maybe even at the time of Love Sick’s airing in 2014 and 2015. 
I’m not sure if young people in high schools do this now... or maybe they do. Maybe I’m clueless and just not watching enough Western and/or cishet content to know. But when I was a teenager in the ‘90s, “gay” was the adjective for everything. "This bagel is gay.” Your handbag was “gay.” Your handwriting was “gay.” The way in which you stapled your papers together could be called “gay” -- I literally heard that in high school, and I still remember it as being one of the dumbest things I had ever heard. And, of course, most doomingly for certain individuals -- many were labeled as “gay,” too. 
As I rejected much of the biases and racism that my Indian family operated by when I was growing up -- so I also rejected the nonsensical usage of the word “gay” as an adjective for anything else but someone’s sexuality.
I was a seriously protected, hugely nerdy Indian kid growing up. But I kind of inherently knew that this unconscious/conscious/implicit/explicit/simmering hate for a group of people vis à vis this adjective wasn’t for me. At that time of my youth, I didn’t actually know queer communities. I just didn’t want to be associated with biased people who insisted on seeming like utter idiots via their language against a minority group. 
(I’m aware now that “gay” as an adjective is likely being appropriated back by young queer communities, just like the word “queer” itself. I want to clarify that “gay” was NOT being used in a "nice” sense when I was a kid.)
I’m meditating on this because, of course, I watched Love Sick well out of order of my introduction to Thai BLs. I started with KinnPorsche, with The Eclipse, with Bad Buddy, and then began to correct that by watching SOTUS -- all shows that have dealt with homophobia in various ways...or seemingly not at all, in the case of BBS, and to just a touch of an extent in KP between Big and Porsche. 
So. I watched Love Sick to learn about Thai BL history. But my mindset is out of order, right? It’s because I’ve already watched many influential shows that carry the influence of Love Sick within them. (As I did in my SOTUS review, I’ll cite @miscellar‘s tremendous analysis of how Bad Buddy was based on Aof Noppharnach’s meta commentary on existing BL frameworks, and I’ll do a lot of comparisons to BBS in this piece, as I’m aware that P’Aof was influenced himself by Love Sick.)
In rewinding my perspective and my mind to set myself up to watch Love Sick: I wanted to be very aware of how this show would deal with casual homophobia among teenagers, and the ever-present question of how it would deal with the question of if the main coupling of Phun and Noh would fall into the “gay for you” category that I discussed in my SOTUS review, and that @absolutebl discusses in this post. 
If @absolutebl flagged Love Sick as likely problematic of mistakes that are being corrected for now -- of course, they’re right. The casual homophobia was rampant. The “gay” question was easily squelched, loudly and early by Noh, who clarified throughout the show that he was not, and never would, be gay. And Phun clarifies that as well, later in season 2. Our boys “called it love.”
Bad Buddy dealt with this differently, very obviously. There was no homophobia. Pat likes all genders. Pran will consider liking girls at some point, to Ink’s joy and advice that it’d be “gainful” for Pran to do so. 
But. (And I think P’Aof recognized this.) In history, we have to start somewhere. I had to get comfortable in my jibblies to watch this, and be reminded from whence I came, an environment of casual homophobia that very directly led to my deciding to live my life in part as an ally.
It’s unfortunate that I don’t get to read commentary on the regular about these shows from a Thai queer male perspective. (It’s why reviews from the very dear @bengiyo are so important for me to read, from his queer male perspective.) (And I think I need to watch more Soonvijarn.) I want to know, from a Thai queer male perspective, if it was OKAY for Love Sick to depict the casual homophobia that we saw, and if the perspective accepts Noh and Phun’s trajectory as a couple, calling their relationship not gay, but love. And certainly -- maybe that perspective has changed over the course of the airing of BL in Thailand, as expectations and artistic strategies have changed with the progress of time.
Throughout my liveblogging of my watching the show (and I want to take a second here to give a HUGE SHOUT-OUT to the DARLING MUTUALS who commented on my seriously late-night posts: @clairificusrex, @lurkingshan, @nieves-de-sugui, @aliceisathome, and many more, I LOVE YOU ALL, YOU AMAZING STANS!), I expressed a lot of love for Phun and Noh, and for other characters, too, like Yu, Per, and Win. (Yu and Per have a special place in my heart as allies-in-the-making, and Per trying everything to make Win, his BFF, happy -- and recognizing his limits while doing so.)
But now that I’m done with the show...I feel like a line of intimacy wasn’t crossed. Maybe I shouldn’t blame the show for this. The show WASN’T a BL. The show wasn’t SOLELY focused on Phun and Noh. Maybe the line of intimacy that I’m thinking of COULDN’T be achieved in a high school setting in 2014 Thailand.
I really wondered about the length of the show as I was watching it. For the MAJORITY of the second season, I thought the length HELPED the boys grow into their relationship. We really saw shades of gray. We saw shades of emotion, of development, especially from Noh to Phun. We saw Noh grow TREMENDOUSLY, maturely, figuring out his boundaries with lovely Yu. We saw Noh figure out his boundaries with Phun. I thought all of that development was truly lovely, very important to see between two young men, and gorgeous to watch. Captain acted the hell out of it.
At the same time, I think the length of the second second ultimately hurt the endgoal of the revelation of their relationship to their communities and family. To the end of the show, we were hearing that the boys were not gay. I think this was designed as a necessary part of their coming out in their relationship -- because I’m not sure that the airing of Love Sick 2 could have been considered successful at that time if it did NOT include that element, the element of MAKING SURE that the audience was TOLD that the boys were not gay. 
And I think -- because I watched things out of order, I’ve watched brilliant shows already correct for these mistakes -- that deflated me just a touch as I wrapped up the series.
As well, up until the VERY end, we saw that the boys were still in a place to consider heterosexual relationships, as in the case of Phun and his friend, Pam, who Noh confused for being a potential interloper. With Phun *not* communicating and clarifying to Noh immediately that Pam had a boyfriend, it set up a moment of real confusion for Noh, as if their already-committed relationship (which they had committed to multiple times already!) was on the rocks, for an interloper of another gender.
While I was watching it, I was confused -- I was wondering why the show needed THIS to close out Phun and Noh’s storyline. 
I wonder if it’s because, in 2014, the show could not have ended WITHOUT that question. The boys would be in a relationship now... but in the future, would things “straighten” out? (Of course, years later, we had ReminderS, which I haven’t peeped, but did establish that the guys were still together, as BL continued to be filmed and as attitudes slowly have changed.)
I think that if Love Sick 2 had ended after the pharmacy camp -- I would have felt settled and happy about this show. Phun and Noh ARE darlings, after all. Captain as Noh, his AMAZING ability to demonstrate a teenage kid’s overwhelmed reaction to the world around him so comedically -- it was really perfect. Both White and Captain are fantastic actors (especially as compared to Krist in SOTUS). 
But there was something about the ending that gave me the jibbles. As if the show couldn’t just leave the guys alone in their happiness. There HAD to be one more dramatic storyline that wasn’t clear. There HAD to be the clarification that the boys were not gay -- not to their schoolmates, not to Phun’s dad, not to the audience. No way were they gay. Again, I think this was where the length of the second season ultimately hurt this series.
And Ohm’s internalized homophobia as well. The way in which he rejected James, left James in the dust. The way in which things were left not quite clarified between him and Mick, although their relationship was alluded to at the end. (I might have missed some clarifications in the BL edits, but I ain’t going back to the full-length episodes to find out.)
And Earn and Pete. Good LORD, Earn. An “I fucking love you” next to the urinals? Dude. PETE COULD DO SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU, EARN. (I frankly wanted to see Pete with Yu. Earn was the Thai version of The Situation from Jersey Shore, getting all up in Noh and Phun’s business and trying to break them up. Fucking Earn. SMDH.)
I have complaints. And I can’t help but think... yes, THIS is what Bad Buddy corrected for. THIS is what The Eclipse corrected for. With Kinn being out and out gay, THIS is what KinnPorsche corrected for. 
Phun and Noh found their love, which I am desperately happy for. Captain acted the HELL out of Noh -- I could not help but laugh out loud, night after night, at how Noh wiggled his way in and out of situations. He is, in Asian parental parlance, a good boy.
But, as dear @absolutebl meditated on, there were mistakes in this show that, thank goodness, are being corrected by the filmmakers that I have fallen for now. I see what Bad Buddy was doing. Instead of “I’M NOT GAY” -- P’Aof had Pran be gay, and Pat be bi, and Pran consider girls to Ink. That flow of that conversation among Pat/Pran/Ink/Pa -- that was sophisticated stuff. P’Golf had Akk say to his parents, not that he was in love with Ayan -- but that he likes men. 
I have previously loved these nuances in Bad Buddy and The Eclipse. Love Sick now makes me WANT THEM, HUNGRILY, as admissions of truth and acceptance. 
Do I need characters to be out and out, like Kinn? NO. That’s a person’s business, that’s a character’s business, if they want to define or call themselves gay. I’m not here to tell anyone where to land on the sexuality expression spectrum, that’s not my place. I’m not here to ASK anyone’s preferences. Just live. Pran certainly wasn’t out and out. He loved Pat -- that’s who he loved, he loved Pat, and there was no other nonsense, no other side explanations, no covering up or jibbly clarifying of any other positions. (And Pat’s statement was so simple, too: “I like both genders.” Boom, done, move on, live and LOVE and be happy.)
What was hard for me was the repeated denial of gay throughout Love Sick and Love Sick 2. I just didn’t think the show needed that -- because the love between Phun and Noh could have spoken volumes WITHOUT those statements. But I also get it. I get that the writers of Love Sick likely thought they NEEDED those statements in order to get the dang show aired in the first place, in 2014 Thailand. I get that there wasn’t that paradigm, yet, as leveraged by people like P’Aof, P’Jojo, and P’Golf, that lets love STAND as the STATEMENT ITSELF, à la Bad Buddy and The Eclipse.
I see what Love Sick did to begin setting up a tremendous, TREMENDOUS paradigm of BLs in Thailand. It was simply groundbreaking. And the ads! The advertisers were also making their statements. These boys were drinking and eating the Oishi like there was no tomorrow. That was big for nascent BL and capitalism accepting nascent BL.
But the show wasn’t perfect, not by a long shot. And @absolutebl Sensei -- you nailed it by listing it as one of your three original recommendations for us understanding what GMMTV is doing, NOW, with their progressive and groundbreaking art. I’m glad I watched Love Sick. I’ll get more Phun and Noh when I catch up with ReminderS -- and I’m glad, for me, that Love Sick is over, and that I know that Phun and Noh end up happily together in drama land, hopefully in a place where their cinematic preferences are NOT in control of the fictional communities around them, and the real audiences watching them.
[For those of you who are following, I’m now going to make a purposeful dive into a few shows that cover a number of priorities. I’m going to watch Make It Right, Make It Right 2, and Love By Chance -- all to learn about the works of the very prolific New Siwaj, as recommended to me by @bengiyo. I’ll also be crossing off groundbreaking shows featuring my simpy darlings, Ohm Pawat and Perth Tanapon, who are currently destroying in Double Savage. Finally, with MIR and MIR2, I’ll learning more about the early high school pulps after having watched Love Sick. Here’s the road front and back. I’ll ALWAYS take input if anyone reading thinks that something’s missing on this list! 
AND AS ALWAYS: MANY, MANY THANKS TO THE FAM that always comments on these posts and gives me unbelievable feedback: @bengiyo, @shortpplfedup, @respectthepetty, @lurkingshan, @wen-kexing-apologist, @clairificusrex, @nieves-de-sugui, @manogirl, @miscellar, @dribs-and-drabbles, @solitaryandwandering, and anyone that I may have missed! I so appreciate you all, and I LIVE for the conversations we have about these shows. 1) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) 2) SOTUS (2016) (review here) 3) Make It Right (2016) 4) Make It Right 2 (2017) 5) Love By Chance (2018) 6) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) 7) He’s Coming To Me (2019) 8) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) 9) TharnType (2019) 10) Theory of Love (2019) 11) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) 12) 2gether (2020) 13) Still 2gether (2020) 14) ITSAY (2020) 15) I Promised You the Moon (2021) 16) Not Me (2021-2022) 17) My School President (2022-2023)]
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adidegmez · 2 months
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I finished rebels nearly a week ago. It took me a while to finish cause i had to study. and then i finished it but i couldnt write. now i can write, finally.
First of all, i loved this show. I loved the chracters and the story so much.
Art style is different than clone wars clone wars art style is my favorite but rebels art style was good too. In the beggining i didnt like both art style but in time i fell in love with them. In time both of these art styles improved so much and i like the way they ended.
Rebels, bad batch(a little), Ahsoka(a little) and Avatar:tla Spoilers
I love our space family. their relationship with eachother is so good. I loved kanan hera ezra sabine zeb chopper they were all such good written characters.
Episodes were fun. seeing rebels try to make galaxy a better place and save galaxy from the empire is what ı wanted bad batch to be when i was watching bad batch s1. but they were all tired and wanted to give omega a better life than a life with war and ı understand that.(everything comes back to tbb these days ı cant help it😅 ) after bad batch, seeing rebels trying to manage making galaxy a better place and being a family is so nice to watch.
Now i am going to write about last season's last episodes. There was so much more I could write, but I forgot most of it because I watched it a week ago. I took notes of the parts that stuck out to me in the last episodes and I want to write somethings about them.
I really liked Kanera they were so good together i shipped them from the beginning but hey didnt get a happy ending and i am so sorry about that but they have a son he was cute.
Kanan and Ezra fulfilled their destiny. And it is sad that we had to saw master and padawan sacrificing themselves for their loved ones. I wish we could have saw more of them happy with their family but they were meant to sacrifice themselves.🥹
And Ezra had to let go of his master it was too painful to watch. He could save his master, but at the same time he couldn't. But at least he saved Ahsoka.
I wanted Kallus to have a character development like Zuko. Well he did but i thought he was going to go more adventures with the family. I am sorry that he didnt spend more time with the family but i love him and his character development.
Gregor died.I loved him. It is so sad to see clones die.It breaks my heart i hope we wont see more clone deaths.I love clones so much.
I am watching star wars for the first time in chronological order (ı am now watching empire strikes back) ı havent seen ahsoka yet but i saw some spoilers. From what i understand ahsoka and sabine is try to bring back ezra. It makes sense ahsoka is like rebels s5 but I wish they had made it animation as the 5th season of Rebels.(i like animations more).But I don't have any prejudgment and I'm sure I'll love Ahsoka too.
And finally,
Kanan saw Hera one last time as he sacrificed himself, right? I didn't get it wrong.
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rifki16 · 26 days
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At 25:00, in Akasaka Episode Two Review
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Photo credit: At 25:00, in Akasaka Twitter Promotional Account
A very healthy delicious congee
I don’t know what to write about the episode. The episode was really a slow-pacing one, which I have written on Twitter, as something that I welcome very much – as in the recent BL LA series which I have watched like Love is Better the Second Around, Perfect Propose, or Although I Love You, and You? Those series all have less than 12 episodes, and the pace always needs to be amped up so much.
Trigger warning: mentions of rape.
The critiques which I have about this episode still stem from the previous episode. I really think they did Shirasaki dirty, by making him a very unknown actor who has never done any stage or TV works. I’m getting ahead of myself, I think I’m gonna make just simple chronological points review like the one I made for Living with Him episode two last week.
This Live-Action is made for a vanilla audience I get that. However, I think that there are good plot points which make sense, not just because the series is supposed to appeal for a broader range of audience, one of those plot points is the way Asami teaches Shirasaki acting.
I’m not one of those orthodox fans of a work. If the film is different than the book, or a live action series, it’s not really a problem as long as there are reasons to it, and the plot is not ruined by it. In the manga, Asami teaches Shirasaki acting like lovers only through sex. Shirasaki doesn’t have a lot of experiences in having sex like lovers, and hence, that was what Asami teaching him. We don’t really get to see the common project that Asami and Shirasaki partake in, however in the scenes that we see in the manga, all of them are about how Shirasaki doesn’t really want to let Asami go. I think the manga was rational in only showing Asami “teaching” Shirasaki sex as the emotional depths which Shirasaki wants to evoke can come only from sex. However, the manga seems to only focus in this one method in teaching Shirasaki, which seems to be like something that you can easily encounter in porn mangas – not a diss, actually a compliment.
In the live-action series, as I have typed in capital letters last week, Shirasaki and Asami seem to be going to a date. The reason why is that when Shirasaki eventually had some private time with Asami at his place, Asami refused to bed him. No shocker, that was also what happened in the manga. However, rather than Shirasaki demanding gallantly that Asami bed him, what happened was, Shirasaki respected Asami’s decision and they agreed to do whatever the couple is doing in dates in the series within the series. I think it worked in the LA series because the series has established how Shirasaki never really had a lover and hence, even the pretend dates with Asami were welcome.
Going back to what I prefaced in the second paragraph, Shirasaki had an episode of a panic attack or some manifestation of completely losing his confidence, after Sakuma took the initiative to tell Shirasaki on the bad reviews about the first promotional posters of the show. It was a little bit unsettling that they made Sakuma this very playful, no-filter, kind of guy. Sakuma was actually quite helpful and really mindful of Shirasaki’s feelings in the manga. However, I cannot say that Sakuma is this insensitive guy, it’s still the second episode after all. I really hope that Sakuma will actually habilitate in non-gender-conforming attires, and I hope he can be more mindful to Shirasaki’s feelings.
Then, after reading all the bad comments, when Shirasaki was coming over at Asami’s, Shirasaki had this outburst episode, when he got out of Asami’s place mid visit, because he saw himself of unworthy being the costar of Asami. I don’t get why the outburst episode needed to happen when Shirasaki visited Asami. Shirasaki was reading the bad comments since they were filming the episode. Maybe it was just that the pressure kept increasing through time, despite the absence of an external stress stimuli.
After that scene, Shirasaki and Asami worked like usual. Then, they went on a pretend date together, it was nice. The date set the basis that Asami seemed to be the only builder of Shirasaki’s self-confidence. The point of contention was that, Shirasaki felt invincible. Side note: me too haha. He felt that no one really expected anything of him because he was good for nothing of an actor – this was already emphasized greatly in the cold open monologue of Shiraski about how he “banged” at the gates of the Japanese media industries in being an actor. I really hate it. Shirasaki has pride in the manga. My Shirasaki ☹. I’m just down so bad for him.
The episode ends with Asami and Shirasaki needing to hug so that Asami fans who noticed of his presence will scatter away. During the hug, Shirasaki felt like he didn’t feel like he needed to let go of the hug, that he wanted to hug Asami even longer. This is where I think the LA screenwriters and showrunners want to differentiate themselves from the anime: Help, I’m Being Harassed by the Sexiest Man of the Year. In the Anime, Junta was practically fucking his way to Takato’s affection. This LA wants to say that well, the affection comes before the sex, we swear. I mean, I have my fair share of NSA sex, and I know what the Anime series has is practically rape plot line, but it does make sense that sex can breed affections between the participants of the sex. If what the LA fears is the backlash by the international viewers, they shouldn’t really shy away from the spiciness of the raw material. At 25:00, in Akasaka manga is already heartwarming enough and Asami was rational enough not to rape Shirasaki. Again, I’m not an orthodox fan of the work, it’s just disappointing a little bit that people have hyped up this show as not vanilla yet, it’s still quite vanilla when it airs. However, I saw on the trailer for the third episode that Asami will actually stay ovet at Shirasaki’s. The scene when Asami got into the same bed with Shirasaki actually exists. I don’t know how will this vanilla show handle the first chapter scene, however, I still have high hopes for them.
Post note: I have posted this on Twitter. I really envy these Japanese semes who take a million pictures of their ukes like Kurosawa and Asami. I mean, if I can land an uke like Kurosawa or Asami I will also take a jillion pictures of him.
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taddymason · 7 months
Text
Brother
One shot of Kaida and Noah (from @finn-m-corvex)!! This au has possessed my mind and made me really want to write something after reading Finn's amazing one shot. Chronologically this would be a continuation (not relevant, but at least in this one Jay hasn't recovered his memories).
I will publish the next chapter of Lighting Pin soon, these weeks I have been with exams and for some reason the third chapter has been quite heavy to write.
(also sorry for any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language!)
Words: 2.9k
TW: implied child abuse.
Living in the monastery is weird. Kaida feels like an outsider and that sucks.
It's weird because there are times she's too aggressive to let her guard down for a fucking second and stop yelling at any of these people. It's weird because sometimes she allows herself to stop and think about how screwed the Administration was with the rest of the world, that these kids here weren't ordered to kill from a young age or that they've never washed someone else's blood under their fingernails. That there are things that she thought were normal and when she says them out loud she realizes that they were not.
Sometimes she feel like a rabid dog that just wants to bite something and not let go, she feel like if any of them talk to her the first thing they will say will be an insult or something hurtful. She is angry at how things have changed, that her father is no longer hers, that there is no normality to return to because there never was one.
And when Tessa tells her how her father treated her and Noah, that anger doesn't diminish. Not when she knew every word was true.
It was hard to process… that. Especially when her Jay would probably set the world on fire before letting something bad happen to her. When he preferred to stay in the Administration despite all the bad things that happened there, the bad things that they had to do in their job, just so as not to lose her.
They had never talked about it, she didn't even know how he would react if she told him, but she was sure that the reason the Administrator had let him adopt her was solely so that he would stay there. Have two elemental masters nearby. It had worked well she supposed.
After her training, she enters the monastery dining room once she saw that it was partially clear. Only Noah was there, lying on an couch reading a book with complete concentration. She didn't have as much trouble talking to him compared to the others. He was calm in a way the others weren't and he wasn't actively trying to make her angry like Jenna.
"What are you reading?" She asks, raising her voice, a few steps behind the couch where he was.
She had been trying to talk to them more, to build a relationship that wasn't based on her speaking sarcastically to them, to be more empathetic as Jay liked to say. It was an effort, but she felt like she should at least try.
The boy looks up, startled by her presence, smiling friendly in a rather familiar way as he gestures to his book.
“Hey, Kaida! I was working on some ideas for a future project. You want to see?" He says in a kind and jovial voice. It was quite difficult for her to believe how he and Tessa could be so calm, have so much patience with what they had had to suffer. How could they make it look so easy? She supposed it was something that came with having siblings.
Kaida nods somewhat uncertainly, and he holds out the book for her to see, a few scribbles and paragraphs of engineering terminology written on the pages that seemed to be some time old.
She can't help but roll her eyes while huffing. She shouldn't be surprised that half of them were so passionate about inventing. “A mech. You really like these mechanical things, huh?”
Noah raises an eyebrow curiously, not responding to the mockery. “Do you know how to read Ninjargon?” She nodded vaguely with disinterest as she continued searching through the notes for some idea similar to a weapon or a ship. "I had no idea. Although it makes sense I guess…”
She didn't miss the way his tone fell at the end. It was easy to read between the lines. Hoping it wouldn't show, she clears her throat. “Yeah, actually, I have quite a collection of books from here. They are better than any shit from the Administration. Especially the animal ones.”
His face lights up with a smile, he brushes away the blue locks that fell from his forehead as he sits up slightly. "I also like them a lot! What’s your fav-?”
His tone is suddenly cut off when a voice interrupts him from behind them.
“Hey, kiddo.”
Both she and Noah turned their gaze toward the door. Jay enters at a brisk pace while giving her a half smile. She doesn't miss the way Noah tenses next to her at the sound of his voice.
That moves something red and burning in her chest and she pushes it down, remembering Tessa's words. She couldn't blame them.
“Hi, old man.” Kaida waves mockingly, hoping the worried look she gives the boy next to her wasn't obvious. It seemed like he could run away at any moment.
“How was your training?” he asks and she's grateful that in that moment he keeps his distance and doesn't get too close to where they were. She felt stupid for not realizing why sooner, but Noah never liked being in the same room with him for long.
Kaida glances at him carefully, gauging his withdrawn expression before turning to Jay as she takes a few steps forward.
“Well, I still insist that target practice is better.” She jokes, although she actually meant it half seriously. She wasn't used to fighting for so long without using a weapon or her powers, physical strength had never been one of her advantages. The fights had to end quickly in her opinion.
But she had also been able to talk to Tessa more, which ultimately must have been something.
Jay laughs softly while rolling his eyes. “If you want, early tomorrow we can do target practice in the yard.”
She smiles. “Don't you think the green one would be against that idea?”
He frowned half defensively as he snorted arrogantly. “Well, he's not my leader.” And that's when he scans the room, paying attention to the boy on the couch for the first time. Jay's gaze lingered on Noah for a moment, no doubt noticing the boy's rigid posture, the way he had deliberately turned his eyes to his book, how he avoided looking at him or making the slightest sound whenever he spoke.
His brow furrows slightly, and for a few seconds, he opens his mouth as if he wants to say something, struggling with the words with a slurred sound.
However, in the end he just sighs dejectedly and mutters a few words under his breath.
“Let me know if you need anything.” He murmurs, keeping his voice deliberately calm. His hand absentmindedly pats her shoulder as he passes, giving the other teen one last look before he leaves.
She nods firmly, waiting for him to leave the room before turning around and walking over to where the other boy was. He was hunched over, his black hair completely covering his eyes as he read his old book. Although it seemed more like he was glaring at the pages more than reading them.
"Hey." She calls, attracting his attention. Kaida took a deep breath before saying. “You don't have to be afraid of him, you know. He’s not going to hurt you.”
Noah frowns with a small inhale, his mouth opening and closing a few times as he lowers his gaze. His fingers absentmindedly run through the pages of his notebook.
“It's… complicated, Kaida.” He whispers, almost as if he was preparing for her to fight and argue like he had with Tessa. His body was so stiff that he was practically shaking as he crumpled in place. “I don't think you understand. You don’t want to hear about this.”
She didn't really want to hear about it, what Tessa had said had been too much. She might as well have taken that as a sign to continue on her way and mind her own business.
But she didn't want them to continue being afraid of Jay either. Especially when he could definitely tell, and she already knew he was dealing with too much shit right now.
Instead of leaving, she makes a sympathetic face, hesitating for a moment before sitting down in one of the other chairs. Her hands clenching together as she absentmindedly pulled at her cuticles.
“Tessa told me about your timeline.” she murmurs, trying not to make her voice sound as sharp or harsh as she felt. She had noticed that he didn't like it when she and Jay spoke loudly, which was all the time because they were both terrible at speaking softly. Noah's gaze clears with understanding and wonder as he sits up straighter. “I'm sorry about what happened to your parents.”
He seems to bite his tongue and his own voice, running a hand through his hair several times between slow breaths.
“He never tried to be my father.” He says in a heavy voice, slurring his words. His tone is calm, however, there's more resignation than anger than she expected and she didn't know what to do about. “All he did was… make things worse. For me and Tessa. He didn't even care when he hurts us or-“ he cuts himself off as he shook his head in regret. "No, I'm sorry. You don’t want to hear this, kid.”
She frowns, trying to think clearly as she spoke. “If you want to talk about it, I can handle it.” Her eyes dart back in the direction Jay had gone before looking back at him. “Jay is not like that. He wouldn’t hurt you, much less want you to be afraid of him.”
He shakes his head slightly. “I just don't think I'm ready to give him that chance.”
Kaida took a deep breath as she bit her lip nervously. She knew he wasn't winning any awards for emotional talks and she appreciated the infinite patience this boy had in handling her pathetic attempt.
“Look- Noah, I'm telling you this, because I know how you feel.” she explains, the words something bitter that she spits into the air with difficulty. “I know what it's like to be… scared like that.”
He looks at her uneasily, looking her up and down intensely. Looking genuinely confused as he cleared his throat with halting words. "How?"
“It wasn't Jay, if that's what you think.” she assures with a rigid tone. The scars on her eyebrow stung with a burning sensation, the memory of the grip of a gun crossing the air, and she absentmindedly scratches them as she looked away.
She hears him sigh in relief before starting to speak. "But then, what-"
She cuts him off with a sharp sigh, speaking quickly as she waved a hand in the air.
"I, um, I grew up in an orphanage, you know? And it was a military orphanage, so it was double shit." "She explains, clicking her tongue between the pauses in her words. As if she had a mouth full of cotton." "They trained us to be agents. Soldiers." She could hear him swallowing hard, swallowing whatever words he wanted to say, but he doesn't speak. “And the people there didn't treat the children well. We were supposed to be tough and disciplined. They did not tolerate mistakes and they had their… methods to make us obey them.”
Noah looked at her intensely the same way Jay did when she said things like that. When she was a fucking mess who bit the hand of anyone who came near, when her first instinct for any mistake was to run because she didn't know what the punishment would be.
She can imagine what it must be like for Tessa and Noah and it doesn't help her calm the knot of anger that coils in her throat and chest. It was one thing for the stupid Administration guards to give her a scar on her face because of her intelligent mouth, but for their father to do things like that to them? That made her stomach turn.
She makes a sudden gesture with her hand, trying to downplay it, so that it doesn't show how much that look affects her. “I'm just saying, I'm still- I'm still dealing with it. Being distrustful of people. Or- “she takes a breath before continuing. "-being afraid all the time."
Noah purses his lips, his face pale as he rubs his eyes, a tired expression that underlines everything he has endured. “Kaida, I-“
"I just want you to know that Jay helped me with that. It didn't matter if I was practically a burden, or if I was too screwed up not to get upset over the smallest thing-" Noah frowned as if to interrupt her, but she continued. "What I'm trying to say is that you don't have to be afraid of him. He's never laid a hand on me. And I know he wouldn't do it to you either."
He is silent for a moment before speaking. “It's just… it's harder than it looks. It's too much. For me and Tessa. It doesn’t help that he- well, he doesn’t even remember Nya or the others.”
Kaida grimaces, rubbing her hands restlessly. “Yeah, I don't think I'm helping with that.”
Noah frowns immediately as he shakes his head a few times again. "It's not your fault."
“Yeah, but I'm not making it any easier either, right?” she snorts harder than she intended. It takes her a moment to catch her breath again between her teeth. Noah looks at her attentively and not for the first time, she wondered where he got the desire to stay and listen to what she had to say. She wasn't good at this. She clears her throat, eyes closed. “I don't want to pressure you to see him as- you know. Just give him a chance. And, uh-” her tone stumbles stiffly and struggles to keep her words steady and not shake pathetically. “I want you to know that you can talk to me about these things if you want, not just with Tessa. I can deal with it.”
She opens her eyes to see his expression, Noah, to his credit, just blinks in surprise for a few seconds before nodding. Clearly confused as to whatever peace attempt they're forming here, but taking it at least. There is a softness in his gaze that she cannot decipher and she tries to ignore it as she crosses her arms.
"Alright." She hears him say in a stiff voice and she only nodds once.
"Good." Her fingers drum against the arm of the chair several times for a moment before she clicks her tongue sharply. “Anyway, do you know the story about the claustrophobic astronaut?” She asks in complete seriousness, he looks at her blankly as she waits dramatically in silence. She waits just a second before smiling. “He just needed some space.”
If she had known how he was going to laugh at a joke like that, maybe she would have told one of her stupid puns much sooner. His loud laughter only encourages her own, and soon the red acid burning in the pit of his stomach evaporates like a cloud.
Noah interrupts himself in the middle of his laughter with a firm and intense voice.
"Hey, Kaida, you can talk to me too if you need." He wasn't lying. He makes sure to add emphasis to his words as he leans forward. "And you're not a burden. You know that?"
She doesn't really agree with that, but the way he says it sends something warm and safe in her chest and she doesn't have the strength to contradict him. Instead, she nods vaguely with lost eyes.
He gives her a tentative smile and looks back at his book, although he still didn't seem to be reading the pages. Kaida, once she is sure that no one is approaching, takes courage before speaking.
"Do you want to tell me about any of your inventions?" Her hand vaguely points to the notebook.
His gaze practically glowed as he looked at her with a dumbfounded smile. "Really?"
She shrugs, approaches him less cautiously than before. "I'm sure there must be something good about Ninjago's primitive technology, right?"
He laughs again, not even bothering to respond to her mockery, before delving into complex, technical terms about his inventions at full speed. She stays by his side, still a good distance away, but listens to him attentively while he speaks without even stopping to breathe.
Maybe having a brother wasn't so bad after all.
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xzaddyzanakinx · 1 month
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Hii I love the way you write. I am reading your anakin stalker fanfictions and I honestly believe they could be made into a movie. Of course in movie it couldn't be so damn sexy (unfortunately😿) but the plot and everything that happens is so intriguing. There is so much depth to this character (Anakin) the first time I read it it blew my mind because I don't expect this level of writing from fan fictions usually!! There is something about your stories that makes it feel like you can touch them, see them, taste them. And the storyline is well thought-out. I accidentally read part 7 first (i think, the one after she got drugged) and thought it was part one, went on to read part two and it still made a lot of sense so that I only realized when I noticed the dates (even then I still briefly thought you maybe just didn't write it chronologically). I think this says a lot about your writing, everything connects. I just wanted you to know that and I hope you keep this series going because I would honestly read 10 books of this. And not simply because of the smut or bc Anakin is hot as hell😻 I can't comment on your posts thats why I tell you here :)
YOURE SO SWEET OMG THIS MADE MY DAY!!!
Thank you love bug.
I try my best to make things tangible bc that’s what I like to see you know? If I wouldn’t read it, I won’t write it.
I will continue this series until completion, not sure how long it will be… I’ll do little oneshots and stuff maybe with stalker/ghost Ani after the series is over too.
Tbh the dates started as a way to keep my thoughts lined up and was like hmmm, yeah let’s keep that
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deceptivemorals · 5 months
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META + Tristan (Because you subjected me to the arduous challenge of writing something concrete about these two with a meme first so now it is your turn to suffer. Best of fortunes!)
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*         send   META   +   a   word   ,   a   name   ,   or   phrase   and   i   will   write   a   head  canon   based   off   of   this   !!!  || @lordofthestrix || accepting
first of all, i have to apologize because you already sent in a similar request in … may. i don’t always respond chronologically and i take forever but it's not forgotten. i also wanted to answer this properly and knowing that i tend to make things long, i needed the right time for it to be answered. and yes, after i finished this really long headcanon/meta post, i noticed that i rambled. i still hope this thing here makes sense and i hope you all enjoy reading it and discovering more concerning young!vampire!elijah.
tristan is a black spot in elijah's story. elijah avoids mentioning him or even worse, giving him recognition for anything that makes elijah elijah. however, tristan had an impact on what & who elijah is now.
to make this meta work, i have to go back a little further.
it is known that elijah is descended from a witch and a viking warrior. rich people (rebekah explains in tvd that they were rich landowners in europe), but simple people. i firmly believe that elijah has been trained to be an outstanding fighter (mikael says he is proud to call him his son which confirms this). even as a human, elijah was gifted in strategy, different fighting styles, the ability to hunt, etc.
elijah has always been naturally gifted at being charming and polite, but as already mentioned, he came from a simple family. he lacked what makes him today: the elitist behavior, the formal language, and the way of dressing.
but until he came to the court of the de martels, elijah had not considered that this attitude/lifestyle was a direction he could take that would complete him.
in the originals 3x01, klaus described the situation of the mikaelson siblings as the following:
"in the beginning, we were so naive. our mother had made us into beasts who fed on blood. but immortality was beyond our grasp, compulsion a trick we had yet to learn. all we knew was a fear of being hunted… that, and a terrible hunger."
but despite this, elijah is shown as the one who is capable of acting farsighted. he's the one who covers the tracks, who insists that they stick together, he's the one who made the rules (of not letting anyone live who saw what they are). i think it's fascinating to say that even finn turns to elijah to present his desire to split up. finn wasn't simply deciding that this would be the way it's done, he's asking elijah.
it should also be added that back then, the mikaelson siblings didn't see themself as vampire royalty, solely because a) they were still figuring vampirism out, b) they were the only one of their kind, c) because they were very much focused on being on the run.
nevertheless, even back then elijah appeared to be a natural leader although i think elijah also had an identity crisis during that time.
elijah was a man who had long had the age and the necessary maturity to lead his own life. he had concrete plans with tatia (i think they soon would have married and started their own family). his parents' decision to turn them into vampires deprived him of this life and stripped him of his wishes. he was no longer human, he was something he could not fully comprehend, something he considered a beast, tatia was dead (and as far as he knew it was her blood that he was forced to drink which made vampirism worse), they were fleeing from their own father, they were in an entirely unfamiliar environment, living in fear and suddenly it was he who was responsible for the welfare of the family, as even their eldest brother finn didn't seem to take responsibility and take leadership. suddenly he found himself being head of the family which wasn't an easy task, especially at this time of new beginnings. in addition, there were also feelings of guilt in connection to klaus which had been intensified by the whole vampirism.
he also had issues with being 'in control' / having the necessary (from him desired) self-control. i think that self-control was already important for elijah as a human being. a good fighter needs self-control, control over the situation and a clear head. i think it's something that was expected in his upbringing (mainly from mikael) and also some kind of protective instinct.
i think the desire for self-control has increased since he attacked tatia. he obviously does not remember, but the trauma of his loss of control remained subconscious. so yes, he strives for (self-)control and to be in control of the situation which gets harder as a vampire.
but how does that get us back to tristan?
funnily enough, elijah was the one who was totally averse to the idea of posing as nobles:
"masquerade as nobles from a land we do not know and whose customs we cannot begin to understand? ridiculous!" - the originals 3x01
his objections were overruled and they were on their way to a real castle, in an environment where they had to be careful not to attract attention and elijah was very aware that this was a dangerous decision ("we're placing our lives in the hands of a stranger." - the originals 3x01) while his siblings mainly saw the luxury of having a comfortable life.
when presented to the count, elijah was impressed by the building, the high ceilings, by everything. he could see the appeal of it, of being something more.
again, it was elijah who stepped forward to answer the counts' critical question of never having heard that his actual expected guest had children.
even later at the party, elijah is shown to converse with the count. on another day, elijah was the mikaelson-sibling in an axe-throwing contest with tristan. he seemed to integrate into this lifestyle with the right amount of confidence while it seems that the other siblings did not do so to that extent and rather focused on romance or feeding.
since the siblings had a very long stay at the court, elijah had a lot of time to watch and learn. he adapted to the 'correct' behavior and the proper way to speak. elijah is a quick learner. he is someone who does a lot automatically after having it picked up and considered it important, and he had copied most of it from tristan.
so why tristan of all people? why not the count? why not aurora?
i think he identified with tristan (a bit) over time.
they probably have roughly the same age and i think they did spend some time together. out of curiosity perhaps, out of sportsmanship (the competition of throwing axes, perhaps even swordfight etc.), out of recognizing that they are both brilliant minds.
although far from being as educated as elijah is now, he was even back then a smart mind with diverse interests, which have been increased during their stay at the court and the new possibilities that it brought (a library, for example). although i do wonder how they even communicated (how did the mikaelson siblings learn to speak french within a year after turning into vampires?).
tristan was an older brother who was always concerned about his younger sister’s well-being, even though elijah soon noticed that this concern was (almost) an obsession. nevertheless, this reflected what elijah felt for his siblings: concern for their welfare, and the need to protect them. they also shared their disdain for their respective fathers.
but above all, tristan radiated control. tristan always seemed (outwardly) self-controlled and he was in control of the situation. a (self-)control elijah was looking for and something he desired as being in control/self-control is up to this day an important matter to elijah.
tristan also radiated a matter of course to deal with power. it struck elijah how naturally tristan saw his position of power, how he rose above others, but mostly how he wasn't scared to use what was given to him. power wasn't a curse, it was a gift. of course, elijah’s power (even with his limited knowledge of vampirism at the time) differed from the power that tristan had, nonetheless, he learned how to handle/use power by watching tristan.
and even if elijah did not always approve of the treatment of tristan's (or the counts) subordinates, he also learned qualities of leadership from his time with tristan. something elijah had to deal with as his family relied on him (and not on the oldest brother finn). don't get me wrong, i think elijah was taught how to be a leader by mikael but that kind of (required) leadership was different.
elijah learned valuable things during his time in southern france and there are two quotes from 'game of thrones' that fit the situation:
"power is power" – people like the count martel & even his children radiated a different kind of energy when it came to leadership, power, and control. a unique power that elijah (and his siblings) now held as well. a power elijah learned to use and not be ashamed of doing so (the first time when he compelled aurora to despise klaus).
"power resides where men believe it resides. it's a trick. a shadow on the wall. and a very small man can cast a very large shadow." – this can’t be transferred one-to-one to the situation, but it’s also something elijah had learned. appearance is important, without the right clothes (and of course without the initial help from lucien), they would have been noticed immediately. the right clothes/appearance/demeanor immediately brought their family a different kind of power, and respect. through the right appearance, you can achieve a lot without having to play the real trump cards. in the originals season two, esther explains to elijah that he dresses the way he dresses because he subconsciously wants to be 'clean'. i don’t think that’s the only reason, he prefers his suits because they give him authority / strengthen the authority he has. because the right clothes are important to make an impression. his suits are like an armor.
of course, the second quote is no longer quite so relevant, because elijah is now a powerful man. appearances are no longer deceptive and he no longer has to hide behind a false facade to be considered powerful. nevertheless, it is still a valuable lesson when it comes to assessing others. opponents are sometimes just puffed-up pomp, to whom one attributed too much power.
what i find interesting, however, is that tristan (and i am referring to my interactions with @lordofthestrix) acknowledges elijah’s power/monstrosity, while he does not acknowledge klaus' position and considers him small (x) (x).
learning from tristan gave elijah direction and i think that also ended his identity crisis.
nonetheless, elijah was not blinded by the lifestyle. he knew the count was a cruel man (a warning lucien had issued). that not all gold is what shines and a beautiful appearance deceives, was also confirmed when elijah (and klaus) discovered how tristan tortured lucien. there was nothing noble in these noble people. elijah was admittedly appalled by that discovery because despite being a monster himself, elijah still did value humanity and decency.
elijah found the fact that a man was capable of such a terrible thing, although lucien, a loyal servant, had done nothing wrong, horrible and he was disgusted by it, especially because tristan felt entitled to give such a vicious punishment and didn't even question his position as 'judge'.
this behavior, this entitlement, and the lack of humility are also something that elijah still has in mind and that he condemns. my elijah had a magnificent exchange about this topic with @lordofthestrix here.
fun fact: this situation was also the moment when elijah should have intervened. not to stop klaus, but to finish off tristan as soon as he had made his threat to spread the news of their true nature. because even if this threat hadn't been a bluff, they would have had enough time to flee. it's something he regrets in retrospect.
i think it's interesting that elijah and tristan left together after the latter was done torturing lucien. i assume they made some kind of deal (which had nothing to do with turning tristan at a later point).
so what does it mean to say that tristan contributed to making elijah elijah? it was definitely not an active process in the sense that tristan had consciously taught elijah. elijah evolved through interaction and observation of the 'wordly power'.
and he embraced the qualities he had picked up in this place.
"we made each other" - the originals 3x04
without tristan, elijah would have taken a different path or would have taken much longer to become the elaborate, elitist man he is now.
he enjoys not only being 'vampire royalty', but also presenting himself as such: powerful, superior, unassailable. over time, the mikaelsons have repeatedly presented themselves as nobility, 1112 in italy and most prominently 1492 in england.
so yes, tristan did have a major influence over what elijah is now although elijah would detest having to give him credit.
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forlix · 21 days
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HELLAUURRR!!!
You're literally the best writer on tumblr, so I'm here to ask for some advice 🥹
So you know how stories have a timeline and some may cover like two years for example but be only around 2k words. HOW TO DO THATT??!? 😭 I always get stuck in time when I write something. If there is monday then there has to be tuesday and I just can't do a smooth slide to let's say the next week of the story. I really can't figure out how to do smooth time skips. So perhaps you have some tips? 😋💖
Waah my English isn't good so idk if you get what I mean. It's alright if you don't want to answer!! ^^
hiii my love!
firstly, u flatter me hello. best writer on tumblr is complete craziness!!! thank u so much for saying that though, you're very kind :') and i'm honored that you're entrusting this question to me!
secondly, this is all sooooo valid. navigating time is one of my biggest writing challenges among MANY so i'm not really sure i have the solution myself, but i can try to walk you through my process if you think that would help. i'm sorry in advance if it comes across as convoluted as i think it does 😭
instead of chronological, day-to-day accounts, i like to think of my fics as collections of important moments. "important" meaning significant for characterization, relationship progression, worldbuilding, etc. these moments don't usually happen back-to-back, because all change takes time.
if i can reference my own "ace," which i took special care to map out the timing for, about a week passes between every scene for most of the fic. i made it this way because i wanted there to be a lot of implicit development during those weeks; the couple needed to make their transition from acquaintances to lovers in a way that felt natural. but of course the development couldn't all be implicit, so the fic ends up being a collection of important moments that gives the reader just enough information to tag along on their journey. which is why u get scenes like mc taping hyun's hand in the training room, mc running out of the arcade heartbroken, and mc and hyun having a heart-to-heart on the gym floor
you can think of it as planting the seeds in one scene, letting them sprout and blossom "off camera" (aka during the timeskip), and then doing a garden reveal in the following scene. the two scenes are still very much interconnected—they still depict the same people in the same universe in the same storyline—but something about them has changed, and with it the plot has progressed
depending on what kind of story you're writing, consecutive days makes total sense, btw. in "crying lightning," i explicitly point out the timeskips with headers containing new locations and times preceding every scene because it the couple is a stylist/idol pair that travels together often over one year. in "everything has changed," which is probably closest to ur example of 2 years spanning 2k words, two years pass between every scene to place byeol growing up in parallel with felix and mc falling in love. but maybe you're writing, say, a camp counselor au or a zombie apocalypse au, and the characters only have limited time together; the way you'd write about a five-day period would look super different from a six-year period, u get me?
i am SO sorry about how long this got holy fuck i am truly terrible at putting anything about my writing process into words 😭 but TL;DR: 1) think of ur fics as compilations of important moments, 2) ~plant the seeds of change~ in one scene and reveal the end results in the next, and 3) think ab what timeframe/time-related format would work best for ur fic and go from there! your english is perfect btw <3 don't hesitate to lmk if u have any other follow-up comments or questions!
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