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#anyway going back to only posting funny shit about d20
arainywriter · 28 days
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this is going to probably be the longest post of my life, and i HATE getting into fandom discourse which is why i don't usually write anything about fandom discourse, but i just want to address some things about our favorite rat grinders so if you want to read, click below
as someone who loves the rat grinders as nuanced antagonists who are also teenagers, i think the rat grinders before they ever joined in on porter and jace's plan were assholes.
i think they were the quiet bullies, the mean people who you never notice until they are mean to you, the ones who seem nice and respectable up close, but talk shit about you the minute you're gone.
i think most of them (kipperlilly in particular) were looking for a reason to be bad. and i know we might not ever get this confirmation, but based off kipperlilly's file and other moments with the trg, i think it's possible this is correct.
they were assholes who needed a reason to be even bigger, more dangerous assholes and most of them took it. and yes, it was either that or be dead, but i want you to know that sometimes that's not even a question. sometimes you don't even care about the other option, you just want to rage.
i think the one time all of them or maybe some of them even thought that what they were doing could be was when lucy died. and that's when i feel bad for them. they had to lock in right there because they all had made a decision, and they all needed to continue it. that's the manipulation.
i know they are kids. they are just teenagers. i work with teens, and guys, let me tell you, some teenagers are assholes. and i don't mean say a funny mean joke asshole, i mean literally going to grow up and be a shitty person asshole. i think some of the rat grinders were those kind of teens.
did they deserve to be redeemed? i think some of them do. i think buddy has a big shot at being redeemed, and i genuinely hated that he died in the last stand and had to make that decision. i think ally is going to try if they can. i think mary ann might be redeemed.
but also, you guys have to remember that this is dnd. i don't think many of you have played dnd before, or if you have you're just really conscientious about everything you do. because as a dm who has played dnd and has made nuanced antagonists, your players are gonna straight up kill them.
brennan knows that. i'm 100% sure he knows that. this isn't scripted. the intrepid heroes aren't thinking about what the fans want every time they play. in dnd, ESPECIALLY in brennan's dnd, it's kill or be killed.
the rat grinder's weren't going to use non-lethal attacks. they were going to kill the bad kids, and they were going to be UNNATURALLY happy throughout it all. they were going to spit in their faces and roast marshmallows on their bodies. they were going to not feel guilty.
sound familiar?
i think the bad kids have been nice to the rat grinders since day one. not kind, nice. they've been polite and nice to them, not going all in until this fight. if this fight happened before the finale, i think the rat grinders would have had more time to be redeemed (ex. see Ragh in season 1 who def would have died in the finale battle if the bad kids hadn't fought him earlier). but the bad kids are stressed and done.
there is no time to be polite and nice when the world is going to end.
i know you liked these characters. i did too. i'm sad to see them go, but even when someone is nuanced and could be redeemed, the person they were a piece of shit to doesn't have to be the one to redeem them. they don't have to be the one to keep them alive and make sure they only get taken the police instead of dead. cause trg would have gone to jail.
aelwyn did. so would they.
people you've wronged don't owe you forgiveness or redemption. trg didn't wrong tbk that bad, but they made them angry, they tried to kill them, and they're probably almost close to ending the world.
i'll miss you rat grinders. you guys were perfect narrative foils, but it was always going to end like this.
now stop being absolute assholes to the intrepid heroes just cause they didn't play how you wanted.
love this fandom, and yeah, d20 get shit wrong sometimes. always make sure to critique your favorite piece of media.
but at the end of the day, this isn't your table to play dnd at. this is theirs and they are having fun. why don't you go and play as the rat grinders in your home game and give them the ending they deserve, or make fanfiction about it?
put your anger into that.
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sunnysviolin · 3 years
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I myself love the idea of transmasc nb Basil. one of the things that really stuck with me is how on the nose his name is. like, Id get it if other people had on the nose names but their names are pretty normal (like Mari, Kel, Aubrey...) and then just... plant boy with plant name. feels like he picked it on purpose to me!! what do u think???
Nonnie your creative genius! It inspires me. Now consider the only other character that goes by a funny weirdly specific nickname......Hero. Run with me  dear sweet nonnie, this ends up being a little bit of a roundabout way to get back to Basil 
So we get the in canon reasoning of the hero sandwich, but yk what? I reject canon when I feel like it!! Or rather I do a soft retcon of canon. Also I only use he/him pronouns for Hero here to alleviate confusion but in reality they would probably be using she/her pronouns for him. Skip to the next set of bullets if you only want Basil (I probably should make these each their own post but whatever)
Mari and Hero have known each other their entire lives. They were born in the same year and their mothers are best friends. They’ve never known a time they didn’t have one another. So Mari is the only one in their group to really remember how Hero was before he transitioned
Hero’s birth name is Aurora (I really like to remind people that trans people don’t need to pick a name that’s anywhere near their birth name. There’s this thing in media where trans people only pick a name that’s like the masculinized/feminized version of their birth name. If that’s your journey then power to you and I love you for it. No judgement whatsoever because we all choose the name we feel destined for, but I want to share other journeys as well!!! My name is nothing like my birth name! purposefully!!) His mom thinks it’s very pretty and perfect for her eldest daughter 
Hero...disagrees. He disagrees with a lot of it, but most of it he doesn’t know how to put into words
The other kids sometimes tease him and call him Sleeping Beauty. It’s always meant as a joke, but he gets really upset by it. His teachers tell him it’s not meant to hurt him, but it does.
He’s six when he tells Mari that he doesn’t like his name. He can’t really tell her why (because he isn’t even sure why. It’s a nice name) but it doesn’t feel like it belongs to him. He tells Mari while they’re sitting at lunch
He feels small and fragile when he hears his name. Like he’s a princess who belongs in a tower waiting for someone to save her. He doesn’t want to be Sleeping Beauty. He doesn’t want to be that. He wants to feel strong. He wants his name to make him feel good.
Mari doesn’t understand the fullness of it yet, but she does see how upset her best friend is. So naturally her mind is racing to come up with a solution. Then she finds one. 
“Aurora is the princess right? Well then let’s make you the Hero! You can be Phillip”
Phillip doesn’t feel right either....but something in it does
“Hero,” He tries it out on his tongue, and it rolls off in the way that Aurora never did. He says it again, unable to hold back a happy burst of laughter. 
It feels right. Nothing ever felt right like this. Like putting on a pair of comfy slippers after only wearing too small shoes his whole life. Mari seems absurdly pleased with herself as well. She vows that no one is going to call him anything else. He’s too happy
That afternoon though as they’re walking home with their moms, she corrects Hero’s mother and tells her not to call him Aurora anymore. Everyone stops and asks her why, and Hero is next to her looking scared. So Mari panicks
“Because of all the sandwiches. Hero brings a hero sandwich every day, and I think that he might turn into one.”
The mothers think it’s a funny joke, but they’ll play along. By the time Hero comes out when hes ten, everyone has been calling him Hero for years, so no one accidentally calls him by his birthname anymore anyway. 
Okay now that HeroMari time is over, let me explain how this relates back to Transmasc Basil. I love parallels, so Mari helped to give Hero his name, and I think Sunny helped to give Basil his name. 
Basil is a nervous little bean. He isn’t really used to having friends, and he loves them all a whole lot. He’s only eleven and a half, but he already knows he never wants to lose them. They’re the best part of his life, and he wants to always be able to be there for them and never hide anything. 
But that doesn’t change how he feels inside. And he feels....not like who everyone thinks he is. Is that lying? Is it lying not to tell the others? 
Basil doesn’t know Hero is trans at this point. Aubrey doesn’t either. Hero doesn’t tell people unless he has to because he passes pretty well (and even though he’s 14/15 at this point he’s still working through some of the enforced cisgender society shit. He isn’t quite ready to be out and proud) 
So Basil thinks he might be the only person in the world who feels like this. He doesn’t have his parents to ask,  he’s too scared to tell his friend, so he just withdraws. They won’t want him once they know, so it’s better to go away now. 
Sunny is D20 perceptive though. 
Sunny waits on the stoop of Basil’s house until he comes out to talk to him. Basil is terrified, but he can’t hold it in anymore. He can’t keep this secret. 
So he blurts out that he thinks he might be a boy, but he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what that means, and he still likes some “girly” stuff, but he doesn’t know what anything means and he doesn’t want the others to look at him and think it’s wrong. 
And Sunny is just like “oh okay”
Basil is about to have a heart attack. It can’t be that easy. Sunny just shrugs because he grew up with Hero, so he gets it. He tells Basil Hero is like him too, and they should go talk to him. But first does Basil want to be called something else? 
Basil hadn’t even considered changing his name. He wouldn’t even know what to call himself. Before he can even start to spiral about making another huge decision, Sunny sees his best friend start to go into his mind, and makes the decision for him. 
“Basil”
Basil? The other boy gives Sunny a questioning look and Sunny blushes but he keeps going. 
“Basil is a plant. You like plants. Besides didn’t you say basil means good wishes and it’s synonymous with royalty. The “King of herbs”...right? That would be good...for you”
Sunny is blushing furiously at this point, and so is Basil. He knows that he goes into long tangents about plants, and the others sometimes let their eyes glaze over during them. Sunny was listening. Sunny cared enough to remember. Basil. 
“I like it,” 
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xaidyl · 4 years
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You could explain individual stuff! I find these explanations very fascinating, actually! OwO
okay! lets do this (this may be a very long post with lots of my random opinions but we’ll go with it) (and also please bear in mind these are jokey and in no real way a representation of these real people with real actual lives.)
***spoilers for most D20 seasons with this cast***
1.The babysitting 
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Actual parent:Brennan 
From my experience DMing, you are effectively a parent to the players. He would also be an excellent dad
Wine aunt: Siobhan
Siobhan gives me vibes of someone who would take a bottle of wine to go babysit, then sit and tell the kids stuff about cults that they weren’t meant to hear. She would definitely teach the kids swear words, and they would love their cool auntie 
Great at babysitting: Lou
Part of the key to babysitting is being relatable to the kids, but also self assured enough to get them to behave. the person who holds that key is Lou Wilson. He also has played dad-energy characters, and that is the kind of vibes that you look for in a babysitter. 
Mediocre at babysitting: Murph
This scenario needs some theatre of the mind. Imagine Murph, he’s read all the babysitting books, he knows everything he could need to know, he lives with Emily Axeford. He’s more than prepared for this task. He tries so hard. The kids love him. The kids also walk all over him. They don’t get to bed in time. He wanted to do a good job. He tried so hard to do a good job. Yet somehow, luck is against him. 
The house is on fire, God is dead: Emily
Fig. Sofia. Jet. All three of these characters would set a house on fire without hesitation, and not one fears God. What does this have to do with Emily’s babysitting ability? Well, all these characters are teaching us to be chaotic beings, just like Emily. We are the children, and D20 is our babysitter. Emily would only replicate the same thing in this babysitting scenario. 
The children: Zac and Ally
I believe it was episode 9 of the unsleeping city. Neither Zac nor Ally were involved in the scene in question. Siobhan makes a reference to Eliza Doolittle, to which Zac makes a Dr Doolittle joke. Beardsley then shouts ‘I can see my dick’, a reference to a different film. This is fairly normal behaviour, and would not make either of them children in this scenario, had they not continued to hysterically laugh for the next ten minutes or so. Sat at opposite sides of the table. I think Zac starts crying at some point. They are absolute children, and also both have strong baby energy. Neither babysit, they are the ones that need babysitting. 
2. Can they be killed?
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Cannot be killed: Brennan
The man is a God. Enough said. Also I’m pretty sure your body would reject your soul before it allows you to kill him. 
Can only be killed by one thing: Siobhan
You would be tricked into thinking Siobhan would be easy to kill- her constitution score is so low, after all. However, you would be wrong. The low constitution score has only made her stronger. More aware. What is the one thing that can kill her, though? Nobody knows, she’s only told those she truly trusts. It could be the most rare poison in the world. Or it could just be Mike Trapp. He (allegedly) has previous.
Can be killed but it won’t last: Emily
It is not anything to do with Emily that her death won’t last. In fact, Emily would be pretty easy to kill. However, if you kill her, Murph will do everything in his power to bring her back. He travels to the end of the earth, and then Emily Axeford is back and gets her new death date in a fancy gothic necklace.
Can be killed but at what cost?: Lou
What cost? The cost to the world. The world would be significantly worse off. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. It’s not worth it.
Can be killed but it’s not worth it: Murph
It’s not worth killing Murph because you would have precisely 0.7 seconds before you were killed by Emily. There is no way you can profit from this scenario, you would be dead before you even realise you’ve been successful. 
Can be killed and it would be pretty funny: Zac
I feel like we don’t discus the correlation between Zac Oyama characters and dying enough. Gorgug was the first D20 death. Lapain was the first D20 perma death. Ricky just like had a weapon that causes him to die. If you killed Zac, it would just be funny because its happened so much. Sorry Zac.
Can be killed but why would you, you monster?!?!: Ally
We’ve already discussed this. Beardsley is Baby. Leave them alone. 
Please kill them they suck: Box of Doom
I dont trust them
3. The fitness gram pacer test
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this is definitely the most controversial of the charts, but there’s three of things you need to understand about my reasoning.
1. Zac is fast at running  
This has been seen a couple of times, namely: adventuring party, where Zac tried to tease Brennan about showing off how fast he his at running, but it turns out it was just Zac speaking his mind, and he is the one who always shows off at how fast he is at running. Also, the video on Siobhan’s instagram of Zac jumping over that table. 
He is also very bad a squats. Why would you be bad at squats? Bad knees. Why would you get bad knees? Running without sufficient warm up. Why would you skip warm up? Because you are very focussed on being able to run fast. 
2. Zac is willing to defend his title of running fast
The way he accused Brennan on adventuring party, he knew what he was doing. Sabotage. Brennan may also be able to run fast, but Zac would prevent him from getting a good score. How? He has his ways. Zac is a good boy, but not when it comes to running fast.
3. I felt bad
I had to give Zac at least one good one :)
Anyways onto the other choices:
Actually tried and got a low score: Brennan, Murph, Siobhan
We’ve already spoken about how Zac sabotaged Brennan to be the best at running. Murph is here because he would try really hard but something unlucky would happen. His shoelaces come untied. He accidentally gets caught in the Zac/Brennan feud. 
Siobhan started off with the intention to try, but after Lou, Emily and Ally had all done, she realised they were in fact much more interesting than the fighting going on. She walks out mid lap 
Didn’t try, got a low score, doesn’t give a shit: Lou and Emily
Its important to understand that both Lou and Emily are capable of getting a high score, they are just better than the whole thing. Why is their DnD group doing a pacer test? Why did Zac suspiciously force them to do this whole thing? 
The difference between them is Lou knows the feud is stupid and has like actual work to do? He sits and auditions for some other big film. He still watches over his laptop. 
Emily however, simply wants to watch the world burn.
Despite their different approaches to the situation, they both have a bet going on who’s going to be the fastest runner.
Ran one singular lap and finished: Ally
Ally Beardsley shows up at the track wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt that is impracticable to run in. They have a llama with them. At no point do they explain this. They walk round the track once, drink their water from a plant pot, then spend the rest of the time cheering on the others with words that don’t quite make sense. 
4. Storming Area 51
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They cant stop us all: Zac and Brennan
Neither mean it maliciously, but both believe entirely in what they are saying. 
Brennan is definitely the guy to go mad over a conspiracy theory. He made all the crown of candy NPCs. He is basically betraying himself. He knows not to trust anyone. He doesn’t trust area 51. The next season of dimension 20 is this as a subliminal messages all the way through. 
Zac says it accidentally. He’s making a character for the charity livestream. He’s still got a hundred hours of character making left. He’s done so many bad squats. Unintentionally, he makes a character that forces all the zesbians to storm area 51. 
Have fun getting shot, dumbasses: Lou
The rest of the cast are being weird again. Lou is equally as capable of being weird, but sometimes they need to chill. It starts with Emily talking about diner ice. It finishes with Brennan wearing a foil hat at all times. 
You guys stop, someones actually gonna do it: Murph
Murph is a good, lawful boy.
Actually shows up: Emily and Siobhan
They ride a motorcycle there together. They wouldn’t have gone alone, but as a duo they are an unstoppable pair. Emily wants to break into a government facility. Siobhan desperately want to be in the real life x-files.
One of the Aliens: Ally
Emily and Siobhan open a door at area 51. Behind it is Ally Beardsley. They are wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt. They have a llama standing behind them. This is not explained at any point. They drink from a flower pot and eat a quesadilla that appears out of nowhere. 
5. Stabbing 
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Would never stab anyone: Murph
Murph is a good, lawful boy
Would stab in retaliation: Lou, Murph, Zac
Lets be honest, the entirety of a crown of candy so far has been these three taking stabs (or metaphorical ‘where is your bulb now’ stabs) as retaliation for a stab another one of these three had done.
Yells “I won’t hesitate bitch” first: Ally and Siobhan
I can’t really explain this one much more other than i’m pretty sure both these people have said this phrase at least once in their life.
Would stab as a warning: Emily
This would be promptly followed by Murph getting her to stop stabbing. Or, depending on the situation, encouraging her to keep stabbing.
6. The water fountain
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Fills up a bottle and drinks from it: Lou and Siobhan
This is the normal way to drink from the water fountain. They were also both very concerned at watching Beardsley’s various different drinking apparatuses in adventuring party. 
Bought 4 water bottles so this wouldn’t happen: Murph
He is prepared. Something probably still goes wrong, but at least he’s got three water bottles left. 
Drinks straight from the tap: Brennan
Brennan is a busy guy. The tap is there, it’s convenient, he needs to get back to planning. There’s so many campaigns, so many characters, so many voices. 
Dehydrates: Zac
Honestly I’m not sure if this man would drink water if nobody told him so
Drinks from a puddle: Ally
like they drink from a vase with a flower, a puddle really isn’t that much of a stretch.
Licks the tap: Emily
She just wants to see the world burn. Also, she knows Brennan drinks straight from the tap. She has to get payback somehow. 
7. A child starts crying
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Makes the child laugh: Lou
We’ve already discussed how Lou has dad energy. I feel like he’s know exactly what to say and how to act to get the child to stop crying. This is less stupid than the rest of my explanations, but I always love how expressive Lou is when he plays dnd. I’m not sure whether its the way he holds himself or the way he gestures, but I’m pretty sure if I was a crying child, I would stop crying if Lou Wilson told me a joke in that very soothing point.
Tries to play with the child: Siobhan and Ally
These two kinda give me older/younger sibling vibes. As a team I recon they could create a game that would calm this child down. Also Ally knows techniques to help adults calm down, they could probably implement these ideas into a game for children.
Gives detailed instructions: Murph
His knowledge comes from the books he has read to learn how to babysit, and the one time he babysat. His explanation is rather frantic however, mostly because he is trying to defend Emily in his answer.
Cries with the child: Zac
He’s sad because all his friends are speaking to this child an nobody noticed how fast he just ran.
He’s also baby, as we’ve said previously, so he probably relates to the child somewhat
The reason the child is crying: Emily and Brennan
The child just watched episode 9 of a crown of candy. 
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jq37 · 5 years
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[obligatory recap ask]
**spoilers for subway skirmish and borough of dreams**
@kickmuncher3 and @galfast: ty for your asks, I’ll use them for the next two recaps. this is probably the least efficient way for me to handle this but I want to keep all of these visually consistent dammit. 
One of the funniest things about this season of D20 is most if not all of the cast has lived in NYC which manifests as very specific references and in character complaints that you just know come from a place of truth and experience. Which is to say we got a lot of that in these episodes.  
Also, this has nothing to do with anything but living in NY update: On Sunday, I saw a man hanging upside-down from a tree--by his feet--and playing the flute. And barely anyone registered it at all. So I really cannot stress enough how much New York is Like That.
Pete opening the fight by blasting a fireball and then telepathically calling out Kingston is--como se dice--a Power Move.
Brennan *immediately* channels the opposite of whatever energy Emily's on and goes right for Ricky's dog to the horror of everyone at the table and his absolute delight. Like, it's a spectral dog but still. Bro. Dog. 
Kingston taking the heat metal damage to get Epona to drop him is so raw. But then, for the rest of the fight, he doesn't say a single thing except for his Command spells which is a very different kind of raw. 
Question: Is Riz's mom the only good cop that exists in D20?
I know this was an RP ep and I know they knew it was gonna be an RP ep but I wonder what would have happened if they had pretended to cooperate with Epona to get more info. Probably just an extended RP ep that would have segued into this same fight eventually. But I'm curious about what information they let get eaten by a swarm of rats.
Misty's Irresistible Dance spell is very clutch. 
The gators from the last fight are back in the form of Kug's summons and one of them still has a grudge against Misty. Misty is all, "send me your resume!" because she appreciates the spunk. I was starting a sentence about what the hell play this sentient gator is going to be in but as soon as I hypothetically asked it my brain was like, "Peter Pan. Next question."
Y'all, this really was Kug's fight. Between calling the roaches, crocs, and gators, channeling Moonshine to call lightning, and killing Epona within 40 mins of the ep, he truly was on fire. Good for him. He also turns into a bear but specifically a bear that would have escaped from the zoo. It's the little details that make this show great. 
Brennan putting his foot down on tying rats together not being acrobatics is the eternal DM mood. 
Back to Epona for a second, do we think she was working for Robert directly? Someone connected to him? Something else? When her shadow split after Ricky's attack was that meaningful or just flavor? Where did that badge come from? Has it always existed? What does destroying it mean? It didn't seem to help. The bad cop ghosts were still around, just no one could control them at that point. If they had yoinked that badge, could they have had a summoning item that hey could use? Or is it bad karma to use something like that? Is it still bad if you're forcing the bad cops to do good stuff? Did Brennan anticipate this or is the Coach Daybreak 2: Electric Boogaloo? Lots of questions.
Misty's cutting words to the cop (saving Ricky) making the Law and Order "DUN DUN" noise is great. 
Emily ends up not needing to roll to make rat nunchucks because her health goes low enough that her magic ring activates but I feel like she low key wanted rat nunchucks. 
Wild that Kingston went down for just long enough for it to be cinematic before being revived by Misty ("Get up, old man,")
Also wild that this whole fight only took about 45 seconds of in game time. It makes sense if you think about it the way you would a movie and that's how most D&D fights are but that's so much play time for so little game time and it hit me this ep because I was actually keeping track of rounds. 
Anyway, I have not mentioned up until this point that the whole crux of this fight is to last long enough for Alejandro to roll high enough to summon the train to Nod but, long story short, Pizza Rat shows up to save the day. Does that make more sense in context? Marginally. 
I like that the train to Nod shows up on the wrong side of the tracks. Like I said, man. Details. 
Oh and to my above point about the cast making comments about NY as people who have lived in NY, I loved Brennan looking directly at the camera when he was going off on people who just stand at the door like idiots while you're trying to get in and then Siobhan pokes like half her head into frame so she can also stare directly into the camera. Mood.
When Ally said Pete shoots Kingston I half believed it for a good couple of seconds. I was right there with Lou. 
OK, so I don't know how many of you have watched Sharkboy and Lavagirl (and, if you haven't feel free to skip this bullet) but no movie has brought me more enjoyment overall than SB&LG. Not because it's good because it's not. But it's so insane that it's amazing. It's right in the sweet spot. I always say, if it was any better, it would be Spy Kids 3 and, therefore, unwatchable (SK 1 + 2 are dope as hell though, for the record). I bring it up because the way Brennan describes Nod reminds me a lot of Drool in SB&LG. Like, the rollercoaster subway car def could be in the same universe as the Train of Thought. This is all to say that I think Brennan could have written a version of SB&LG that was better without being worse. Idk if that comes across as complimentary, but it is, and to both parties actually. 
From the way Nod (the kid) is being framed (in this ep and the next) I know we're not supposed to mistrust him but, put in that situation, there is no way I would trust the gray faced, black eyed, creepily gliding dream child. 
Post fight, Kingston wants to offer an apology for what he said about Pete and Nod wants to apologize for putting Pete in his current situation. Also, the group decides to be more open in general. Kug, as most of us guessed, got beauty and the beasted for white collar crime by his business partner (Gabby) who is Esther's mom and a witch (also, Ricky thinks his crush on Esther is a secret which is just adorable and completely incorrect).  
Brennan cuts sharing time off because this is the combat episode dammit! Save it for next session. But, because I'm behind, next session is now! Let's get into The Borough of Dreams.
Misty, as a faerie, is instinctively mistrustful of vising other magical worlds and eating the food or taking things at face value. I love that she's playing a character where she can ask these questions and not be meta-gaming because I had some of the same concerns. 
Wildly, WALLY walks out of the train as he just happened to be on it (as conductor) at the time. Kug bursts out with the fact that he's his dad and Wally takes this to mean that Rat Jesus is his bio dad but, even after being left alone for so many years, he claims Bruce as his real dad. He's wrong but he's sweet. 
"I thought you were mad at me." Brennan, you didn't have to do that.
Murph clearly trying to not accidentally call Wally a piece of shit because that's his go to Kug way to describe things is so funny.
"We could turn me into a rat." WALLY
Kingston and Misty looking at each other like, "These absolute children," while Pete and Soph are making Brittney Spears references. 
So we find out what all of the magic stuff they picked up does. Misty's mirror can see invisibility. Pete's grill helps with persuasion. The thousand hour energy makes you immune to sleep for 42 days(!) The bagel can be used for divination or to essentially kill a person but spread their essence throughout the universe  (which low key sounds like a sacrifice someone might make to help cancel the spread of say an undead presence or a money virus). 
I want Ricky and Wally to be friends forever. 
Kingston's lack of connection to the dream world is so sad. Like, he's no nonsense but he's like NO NONSENSE. Like no nonsense possible. So he's just walking around like Eddie Valiant in Toontown. 
And, at the same time, the rest of the party is doing the MOST nonsense. Mary Poppins-ing into the sky. Misty is making out with the moon. Wild. 
SOBER SALAD
Ally drops the ketamine on the tomatoes line and Brennan fully breaks
Very sweet for Pete to bring Kingston a salad, even though that's such a random food to just have in your pocket(???). Why does salad keep coming up on this show? One more time and it's officially a motif.
So the dream world basically works on Sharkboy and Lavagirl/Xanth/Phantom Tollbooth/Wonderland/Toontown logic. If you've seen/read any of those, you basically have it down. 
"Only people with Sprint have service."/"Oh, amazing!" Brennan threw that softball out for anyone who wanted it and Emily, as usual, hit it out of the park.
Brennan very clearly knows his NY history. The mob boss (lucky Luciano, no not that one) that he mentioned during the sleeping with the fishes bit is a real dude and basically the dude who brought organized crime to the US (in the form we know it now). 
Ricky and the mints. Lord.
Anyway, the one item I didn't mention earlier is the holy grail detergent which can literally clean souls. Which sounds mighty interesting considering some of the other stuff that's come up this campaign. 
(Also, I wonder if you could use the bagel as spell components since it contains everything in the universe in microcosm).
I can't believe Pete was the one saying, "At least eat before you shotgun that 1000 hour energy." By the by, the 42 hour span of the energy drink makes me suspicious. Is that just for humor (and accurate math) or it this a Chekov's Gun kind of an item indicating some kind of time jump at some point? Ricky drinks it later in this ep so, if there's a clock attached to that, it's ticking. I'm prob reading into this but I assume if you're still reading these, this is what you're here for. 
Ally making sawing motions before being told an egg creme has nothing to do with eggs and is in fact a drink.
Pete! OK, so Pete has made some good steps in this ep, starting with promising to start reining in the drug usage. Later he works on his magic and also gets over Priya. This is the most endeared I've been to him all season. Especially his, "I try to do a good job," line. I felt that. 
"It's still open to you." Aw.
Brennan clearly saw the chance for a lore drop this ep and boy did it drop. Let's run through the highlights.
Nod dumped all this on Pete the way they did because it's super super hard to contact a Vox Phantasmus beforehand due the the natural, waking world inclination to brush off dreams. You have to have the job before you can talk to the boss. Cruddy system but that's how it goes. 
When Sophie said the thing about Robert Moses creating spaces that can't be accessed she meant by magic but it's an interesting way to phrase it because the irl Robert Moses is known for (allegedly, but like, it tracks) trying to keep black people out of certain spaces. 
Robert Moses sold his soul to Hell and Faerie which is why he's still alive it seems. No one wants to collect on his soul and anger the other party.
Whoever predicted that the golden door for Emma Laz's poem was the rectangle from episode one, collect your prize because it's confirmed in this ep. 
We learn about the ephemeral axiom which basically says, a dream can be all things but once it manifests, it's a single thing. (you might even say, "it is what it is".)
So another big thing we learn is that if a dream gets so big that manifesting them in the real world would break the game, it's called a Paragon. There are four total: Heaven, Hell, Faerie, and The American Dream. (Wild that The American Dream is the only country specific one that exists. Like, I rep my home team of course but the U.S. is a pretty latecomer to the country party. You'd think someone else might have gotten Paragon status at some point.)
"Was one of them the Grand Canyon?"
Anyway, dragging the American Dream into the waking world would fix the American Dream to mean one thing--I assume making tons of money if Robert Moses has his way. I'll admit, I was a  little fuzzy on the mechanics of this on my first watch-through because pulling the American Dream into the real world sounds like it should be a good thing. But I think, at the most basic level, it's a matter of you shouldn't put magic that shouldn't be in a box in a box. I'm still wondering about the exact implications for the waking world if he succeeds though. Like, how would that manifest? Would everyone suddenly become money hungry (lol, how would you tell)? Would people still want what they want but the American Dream would just be understood to mean making stacks and none of the good Superman-y stuff?
"It's not Protestant work ethic is it?"
Robert Moses is undead and can't get into Nod, so those are good things to note. 
I was so ready for Wally is get dispelled and for him to be a figment of Kug’s imagination or a dream or something. I braced myself so much. I was ready to set up a firing squad for Brennan for doing that to Kug.  
Who tipped the bugsters off to where Pete was gonna be? As far as I can tell, the only people that knew were the gang plus Alejandro and Esther. Maybe someone was scrying on them and that’s what the roll Zac failed during the wedding ep was. 
As soon as Brennan mentions locking the door, Ally immediately makes the connection and goes, "Key to the city." Nod "locks" the American Dream and gets rid of the lock which seems to mean the American Dream is temporarily unavailable. Which seems not good and like it's gonna have collateral damage for sure but I guess you bad is a matter of degrees and Robert getting in would be worse. But still, imagine your immigration papers get declined because some random kid decided to close down the American Dream for a couple of days. 
So, we get some backstory of Misty. She apparently just was straight up not having a good time in Faerie so she stole Titania's shoes (allowing her to be in iron-filled NYC without triggering her fairy vulnerability) and peaced out. 
"She's gonna kill you."/"Only if she can get here and I have her Goddamn shoes." (**A million airhorns in the distance**)
I love that Emily is still on the souls thing. Emily doesn't believe in Occam's Razor. In fact, I'd like to propose a corollary called the Axford Axiom: The coolest path between two points probably isn't the correct one, but it should be! I want her to run a campaign so bad so I can see her be in a game where her crazy endgame is what's going on because she's the one who wrote it. 
Misty: Let's go to hell!
So much like a videogame, the map has opened up and we have three places to check out. The former locations in the dream world of Faerie (Carnagie Hall), Heaven (JFK airport), and Hell (where do you think? Hell's Kitchen). The gang splits up to look for clues (and drinks, in Misty's case). Actually, make that four places: Pete goes to the Met Museum of Memories to basically Avatar mind meld with the other Voxes and get a handle on his magic to a degree (thank God--Nod?). We'll take these in order of appearance, which means we're off to Hell with Kug and Ricky (plus Ox and Wally).
(Focus on the Pizza, baby!)
At first I wanted Ricky, the good boy, to go to Heaven, but the idea of a firefighter in Hell also has appeal. 
Re The rat holding his guts: Gross. 
Ricky holding his axe like a cell phone.
So we and Kug learn that the rat-spell that was cast on him wasn't actually a rat-spell. It was a spell that would make his outsides reflect his insides and his insides happened to suck. I'm wondering if that means that it's a static spell that reflects his outsides at the time it was cast and it would need to be recast to reflect any moral progress made or if it will just revert him once he's made enough progress. 
I'm also wondering (partially bc one of my players asked to do this last session) can a Druid wildshape into a person? I feel like no, but like, did any of you ever read Animorphs? You know how in book 1 Tobias gets stuck as a red-tailed-hawk but then later her gets his morphing ability back and then he can turn back into his human form for 2 hours at a time? What if Kug just started doing that? Just being a rat who is sometimes a dude. 
They also go to the statue of liberty (which has a French accent, natch) who shows them that there's, like, a money/greed virus infecting the Dreaming and the American Dream. Ricky smells undeath again. They think vampires. That's plausible but I'm not sure. 
OK, Heaven. 
WHOOOO, strap in y'all
(Sidenote: I wonder what would have happened if Soph hadn't chose to go to heaven. I feel like she could have easily run into you know who in hell had she chose to go there, but I'm getting ahead of myself).
Brennan actually tries to lead Emily into the thinking about Dale mindset but Emily, having reached a note of closure in Soph's character arc, pushes back on that.
honeyougotastormcoming.gif
Brennan,about to wreck her entire life: Cool.
I and the cast keep saying heaven a lot but it's like an all roads lead to Rome situation. It's heaven, Valhalla, Elysium, nirvana. Like, whatever Good Place you believe in. It's the Good Place. 
Sophie, upon being told that if she jumps into the fight at the Pearly Gates she knows nothing about, she might literally die: And what about it?
Emily's face when Brennan says, "And you see Dale," is so much. You can see the entire range of human emotion in her eyes in that moment.
Sidenote: I wonder how much of her backstory Emily planned and how much Brennan dropped on her. Like, she knew Isabella was part of her backstory obv. Did Brennan come up with all of this whole-cloth or did she say she wanted there to be something supernatural and and let him fill in the details. Very curious about the collaborative process.  
 When Dale's character art comes up, it says "Sophie's Angel" for Dale's descriptor so where I thought we were going was that Dale was Sophie's Guardian Angel who wasn't supposed to be romantically involved with her and the reason he was gone is that he was forcibly brought back to heaven. But that may be because I recently watched this.
Dale, is upsettingly sweet with Sophie, calls her "sweetie" the entire time they're together, fights a ton of angels to get to her, and says he got her text message. Emily is about to cry. *I'm* about to cry. I'm sure the only reason Brennan isn't fistpumping is because he needs to stay in character. 
Dale gives this cryptic piece of advice before he is dragged off by angel guards: When you get to the top, I know what it'll seem like, but there is someone there.
Emily, of course: I fight the angels.
The angels, hilariously, don't take it personally that she's fighting them--and very well, but not well enough to beat a nat 20. Sometimes the dice are spooky in tune with the story.
"He's got a job to do here. Who's gonna watch the deer?"
Dale also tells Soph to tell Jackson he said hi which is interesting to say the least. 
Emily gets two very dope lines in a row:
"Let me hold your hand through this Alejandro."
"I'm gonna kill her. And I don't think she's going to the great big airport in Brooklyn."
That's it for her for now, but let's put a pin in that for now and come back to it after we check in with the others. 
Siobhan and Kingston are at the former spot of Faerie, the Glamour Bar.
Zac jokingly (I think) guessing Dr. Doolittle as the thing Siobhan can't remember when she says Eliza Doolittle is so funny. 
Also, her terrible cockney British accent on top of her actual British accent is great.
I love that the two actual Real Adults are the ones who go and get wasted mid-mission. 
Brennan introduces "Bobby Goodfellow" and it takes Siobhan exactly four seconds after Brennan finishes the word "Goodfellow" to be like, "It's Puck." She knew and she knew her character would know it and she hardcore pounced.  
I meant to mention this before but it's super funny that Kingston has been around the magical block but there's still so much he doesn't know. He was surprised by a bunch of stuff in this ep that I'd think he would know about (like the Midsummer's faeries being real) but nah. He's like, "This is my specific brand of magic nonsense. That's what I know about. I don't mess around with any of *that* stuff. I stay in my lane. I stay in my city."
Ty Brennan for teaching me how to pronounce sláinte. This is the first time I'm hearing it out loud. 
I love his Puck voice. Like, the little British street urchin voice.  
No big surprise, Puck sent the mirror on the order of Oberon and Titania (who are not back together but are knocking boots according to him). 
Puck warns Misty, "The world of mortals is not long for this world," and follows it up with a seemingly sincere, "Come home. We miss you," which is an interesting thing to say after announcing that Titania is gunning for her. Who is this we, Puck? Your boss wants to bodyslam her!
Also, what do the faeries know that they're not saying? All of them in the bar seemed to know something was off but none of them said anything and Puck didn't elaborate. 
I've always liked the trope of the person from the otherworldly, magical or super advanced being like, "Idk what you're talking about. Humans are great!" because it's the opposite of the snooty elf/vulcan/whatever trope that I really can't stand. Misty showed shades of that in this conversation but I feel like there's still so much that we're missing in her backstory and I wanna know what it is.  
(Also, this is prob just me being a little pepe silvia but I would be very unsurprised if Misty got an opportunity to betray the party at some point. Don't @ me. It's just something I could see myself offering to a player for the drama of it all). 
Anyway, Kingston is extremely uncomfortable in the bar and makes a hasty exit so let's go to the museum with Pete and Nod.
Ally jumps onto the, "Suggested donations are for suckers" train w/ Siobhan. 
Turns out, Pete f'd up Robert up so much that he has kind of a brain link with him. I wonder how long that's gonna last. 
Pete gets proficiency in arcana and a choice between lesseing wild magic surges or gaining some control over them (2 wild magic rolls on a fail and ally gets to choose which effect takes place). Obv the second one is more fun rp-wise so that's what Ally picks.
It's a memory museum so OF COURSE he gets a chance to look at the memories of the rest of the party. But it's getting late so he only has a chance to check on one person's memories. He, naturally, picks Kingston. Makes perfect sense from an RP perspective but out of character I feel like Misty is the most closed book of the party. 
Pete sees Kingston's life from his childhood to the present (Brennan puts Lou on the spot to do some improv...I mean beyond the improv they're already doing) and it's about what you would expect based on what we know about Kingston but it's very beautifully described (sidenote: did any of y'all ever watch the life and times of juniper lee? where she can't leave the city bc she's like the buffy of that world? I really felt shades of that, except more self imposed).
During that montage, a character is like, "You could make hundreds of millions of dollars--I mean, I'm exaggerating," (s/t like that) and I'm not gonna go back and check but I feel like Brennan (or maybe Lou) made almost exactly the same comment in the first ep of this season in a very similar context.
Oh, also, Kingston gets dubbed Vox Populi by a dragon on Bleecker Street in case you were wondering about logistics. 
Again, Nod says that inviting Liz into his life was basically dooming Liz to be stuck dealing with the Unsleeping City but I feel like unless you have a Vox position or something similar you should be able to, like, opt out. So what you need to ignore some weird stuff day to day? May I direct you to my earlier anecdote about the flute dude in the tree. New Yorkers are good at that. And if she moved away, would it even be an issue?
Actually, that raises another question. Is NY the only place where magic is happening? It can't be because Santa is doing his thing at the North Pole. And NY has the Umbral Arcana which shields magic from muggles. Does that mean that elsewhere, magic just isn't hidden? I'm guessing that works because the bulk of magical happenings are happening in NY. Which, again, if so, couldn't Liz just move if she really wanted to? Or is she actually being *kept* there? 
Ahhhhh, that argument scene with Kingston and Liz. Ow. 
Robert's subconscious is heckling Kingston's memories the entire time. 
The party gets back together, Pete immediately lets Kingston know he was memory spying on him and hugs him (while Misty is drunk a singing over him). Their rift literally caused a kind of rift in NYC which is now healed (which causes Sophie to see the Unsleeping City/Dreaming Yin-Yang sign over their heads).
 Ricky drinks the 1000 hr energy so start the clock I guess. 
Misty, upon hearing that Dale is dead basically does that John Mulaney bit: Hey, do you want me to kill that guy for you? Because it sounds like [s]he sucks and I will totally kill that guy for you. 
It's the day of Priya's art show which I totally forgot was happening. Before that, Sophie finally goes to see her brother and we can return back to that pin I mentioned earlier.
(Also, it’s the 20th which means we’re getting really close to Christmas)
He says that their family got mixed up with the Confettis and they've been helping to launder magical items that Confetti is paying some rep from Hell (an associate of Robert's).
And by, "Some rep from hell," I mean Isabella Infierno specifically.
Emily, hilariously riffs for a while about how small it was of her to call Isabella a succubus even though she clearly knows at this point that Isabella is some kind of demon. I mean...Infierno. Come on. 
Sidenote: Which demon actually trying to be subtle would pick the last name Infierno? You wanna blow your cover for the aesthetic that bad?
Emily goes, "Oh my (beat) Nod," which I think is the exact way she dropped the first, "Oh Melora," in one of the first eps of Naddpod. 
Anyway, it turns out that Soph's family knew that Isabella was gunning for Dale (he was getting close to realizing something shady was going on) and, while they didn't call the shot, they let it happen.
Oh! He also says Dale was a chosen one from "some monastery" which, of course, fits in with Dale's comment about saying hi to Jackson. Now I'm wondering if his other comment--about there seeming like there's nothing at the top--is about whatever chosen one test he had to take to get the position to begin with. And maybe he was giving a clue to Sophie so that when she takes it, she'll for sure pass and get whatever dope powers or weapons or privileges come with the position. 
"The only reason I'm not going to go after you right now is because I'm not organized enough to give you the fucking revenge you deserve." Soph is cold as ice after hearing about what her family did. 
"Maybe you should have said that to Isabella before she went after me." Another mic drop line from Emily. This really was her episode. You can really see Emily channeling hr genuine emotional reactions into her character.  
La Gran Gata shows up to let Soph know she has her back to hunt down Isabella. The only other warlocks really seen played are Fjord on CritRole and Leiland on Bloodkeep so it's wild to see a character with such a chill relationship with their patron.
So, Priya's art show. They show up (to a distressingly unsafe building from Ricky's perspective) and it turns out, not only is it performance art (the worst kind) Pete *is* the art.
"I present to all of you: cruelty, a exploration of a relationship. Peter, take my hand."
major barf.
Pete goes OFF
Kingston: Picasso is art, this is bullshit!
Siobhan: Her last name is Danger? I hate this bitch.
Pete gets over Priya instantly which totally tracks because, like I said, barf. 
Sophie stealing Ricky's thing and rooftop jumping. Zac narrows his eyes when she says that.
I love Isabella's title card. It says, "Literal Succubus". It reminds me of the funniest scene in Bedazzled when the Devil (Liz Hurley) gives Brendan Frasier her business card and it just says, "The Devil".
But she's here and she's here to fight! I'm so excited for this one y'all! Unsafe building. Lots of civilians. Sophie (and Emily) going totally feral. I haven’t looked forward to a fight this much since Adaine went for Aelwen. Let's gooooo!
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