#and this is only one of them nooooo
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hello everyone 🔞
me and my friend oftentimes talk about tfp ratchet. and by "talk" i mean engage in direct sexual harassment. anyways, i made grandpa squirt
#valveplug#he's my friend's favourite tfp transformer of course i've gotta make him squirt. for her#me? i only like him a normal amount... haha...#i definitely havent drawn him pregnant and laying eggs and stuck in a wall... nooooo#also yeah in the first one that's megatron. i just needed a distinct pair of hands. not that i would have drawn them well#most of my artistic talent was used up by that point#but whatever. we're here for robot pussy not robot hands#tfp#tfp ratchet#transformers#oh holy shit i accidentally posted this. was gonna keep it in the drafts until i could find the courage to post but#well. here it is
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oh yeah i watched the new ii and it was pretty wack. my only two thoughts are
i love cabby
they had to neutralize clover?????? hello?????????
#melonposting#ii spoilers#clover continues to be one of the only good people here. like hello thank you for saying that cabby didn't do anything wrong#(though at this point ae's probably just kinda backpedalling after the ableism allegations so. yeah. anyway it's really the bare minimum)#also it made me so angry to see nickel again. nooooo we just got rid of him!!!!!!!!!! boo tomato tomato tomato#i did find it funny that they were gonna have the dumb fantube-bot family thing and then blueberry interrupted it. ha ha ha. ha#yeah about the other thing. now i'm worried that any victory cabby gets out of this will only be a result of ae backpedalling#it's already pretty weird that the show's general perception of cabby did a complete 180 out of nowhere#i dunno. everyone ganging up on mephone was kinda strange#like okay springy and walkie talkie have their beef with him. but the cameras? zoetrope??#forgive me if i'm being dumb but i can't remember anything so horrible mephone did to them to warrant (gesturing vaguely) all of this#i dunno it's just kind of silly to have the big-bad be 'all of these random guys mephone kinda annoyed'#like huh. huh?#idk i'll see where they'll go with this. hopefully cabby doesn't get screwed over <3 that's really all i'm hoping for haha
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lil asshole. kept me up all last night
#she knows what she did#her name is fluffy cuz when we were forstering her and her siblings we didn't want to gove them names in case we weren't keeping them#so we came up with nicknames such as Fluffy and Calico and Orange and Tabby and Mama#we only ended up keeping fluffy and calico#but we really couldn't decide on thematic names. so we gave up and kept the nicknames#i really wanted Nyx for cali and Bastet for fluff but nooooo. mom doesn't like one-syllable names#oh and i nicknamed mama Vanillabean because she's vanilla colored and a bean#but the names have stopped being their original stem#now it's Fluffers and Calibird#cali chirps like a bird so that's where that's from#she's also the embodiment of chaos which is why i wanted Nyx#i call Cali Calliope sometimes because i'm not giving up the theme. her chirps are vaguely musical so it counts i think#existenceunrelateds#cats#kittens#kitties#cats of tumblr
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i wish i could articulate the experience of seeing a band you're into live like actually seeing them in person because its so strange yet fascinating
#every time i hear take me for a ride by sparks it makes me think of the nyc show - the first show of theirs i saw#bc that was their walk on music. and i was front row for that show#and like. it was so surreal. so strange. obviously in a good way but its just something id never experienced before#and i noticed this especially with russell in that i had a weird thought that went 'oh wow thats him. he realls looks like himself'#and like of course he looks like himself but what i meant by that was he looks like that guy who ive seen 5 billion images of. hes that guy#like not only does he look like the him in more recent pictures but seeing him in person like 10 feet away#its like i could recognize every era of him. i could see like 70s russell in his face. bc of course thats his face! but still#is this making any sense.#like i feel like if you met 70s russell once and never saw him again until now youd immediately recognize him#and sure thats because of two other things - one that he has distinct facial features kinda and also that hes aged so well#but it was again so surreal to be like. in the same space. right in front of. fairly close to. that guy whos been in my phone. you know?#this was true for ron and the other guys in the band too of course its that feeling of wow its them! those people ive only seen pictures of!#and again being front row for that was bonkers insane. its like what do you mean these people are real#but the thing w russell i just especially noticed almost immediately when they came out onstage like hes that guy. for real#is this making any sense . anyway i just had to finally get this one out#the only downside of this experience was that yes these people are real and yes they can see me. a little anxiety inducing#its like nooooo dont look at meeeee im such a weirdo i bought a ticket to see you like everyone else here#anyway. concert thoughts
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every time I see people talk about the newest Sun and Moon Show episodes I grow more disappointed.
#I think I'm just gonna remove my CSS boys from it entirely#like sorry but comparing a character to a serial killer rapist isn't okay ever. they only thing Bloodmoon with this guy is killing.#^ has in common#tw rape mention#cw rape mention#it the tags but whatever#I also really don't like how the creators seem to be shaming fans for liking characters. fuck you. fuck off.#Amp said it well. Moon has also killed people. Monty is a manipulative asshole. Sun has also killed people.#I think the only ones who haven't killed people are Lunar and Earth#but nooooo they're the GOOD guys! you can like them but how DARE you like the villain!#fuck off and suck my entire ass dude.#tw vent#cw vent#I still enjoy au content for the show! but at this point the show itself just kinda sucks from what I'm hearing.#I'm not gonna subject myself to that shit. I deserve better then that sort of mental punishment#I have more important things to be angry over
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I feel like Steve and Frances would be friends. Just like,,,, buds. Pals. They meet to play chess out in Central Park every weekend and Steve wins most of the time but it's only because he eats Frances' pieces when she isn't looking and she's way too high to keep track of his strategy.
#bigtop burger#btb steve#btb frances#She just seems like she'd be really tolerant and even encouraging of weirdness#They give me an iroh and toph vibe#Or like an ice king and marceline vibe#Two bros#Two pals#Being buds#buddies#They go foraging for mushrooms in the woods together#Whatever mushrooms Steve collects she has to take from him because he tries to eat them instantly#While she has a recipe she wants to make with them#He eats the poisonous ones behind her back because they're extra tasty and prettier#Sometimes she points out the poisonous ones only to look back a minute later and she that they're gone and she's like#STEVE DID YOU EAT THAT? I TOLD YOU ITS POISON!#And he's like “Nooooo! Of course not!”#While his mouth is clearly full of deadly mushrooms
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[ID: A digital drawing of a polaroid picture captioned “To my biggest fan - Ariana Griande” in cursive at the bottom and has a lipstick kiss on the top left. In the picture, Ariana Griande is posing with Mumbo Jumbo, an arm reaching behind him to make heart fingers and her other arm out to presumably hold the camera. They are both smiling into the camera. /End ID]
#ariana griande#mumbo jumbo#grian#mcyt#hermitblr#i love this dumb duo so much it's unreal#brain keeps giving me new animatc ideas for these two and it's like oh my goshhhh nooooo stop giving me them#art by this machine#oh balls i forget her wings anyways#i'm slowly becoming one of those artists who only draws one character for like twelve years
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*Bangs table aggressively*
Okay soooo. I've told you about the underrated music group in my school. Well, this year's final event is going to be a compilation of Broadway musicals, not bad, but I fear how they're gonna represent it.
My group already had three songs completed, and we were thinking of a fourth song we could imply. We will see that possibility, but while we decide that we had a waaaay better idea...
WE'RE GONNA COMPOSE OUR OWN ORIGINAL SONG
I HAVEN'T WRITTEN A SONG SINCE LIKE FOURTH GRADE!!!
AND NOW I GET TO DO IT WITH OTHER PEOPLE!!!
MY BRAIN IS BRAINING TOO MUCH!!!
We have a little bit of the lyrics already, I came up with the melody and I'm pretty sure we'll record it so I miiiiight post the finished version. *Inhales...*... AAAAHHHH
Anyway, that's it, I have tk record some ideas because my brain is worKING SO MUCH!
#kaynai life#kaynai music#This counts as “kaynai music” right?#I guess so#School music?#Should we have a band name?#It is my last year at that school tho#HELP THIS IS GETTING SAD NOOOOO#😭😭#I'm gonna miss them 😔#Literally I'm the only one from my generation in that group!
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“reconciliation” that is just one person dying for the other or making a big sacrifice for the other is NOT reconciliation
that’s just GUILT and conflicting feelings about the person who died and who they were to you and what they did to you
reconciliation is about taking the time and effort and initiative to rekindle what once was and accept or at least acknowledge what was done and what has passed, it doesn’t happen in just one big moment all at once
#this is about the reconcilation fics i'm reading that are just#a takes a lethal hit for b#b gives their whole livelihood up for a#but NEITHER or them have actually reconciled or really even barely started#a reconciliation is not someone dying in your arms knowing that prior to all this your last words to each other were sharp and scathing and#perhaps even true#and then only now#in a moment of knowing this person is dying or that you will never see them again#you both#or maybe even just the dying one#drops the bombshell of actually they cared for you all along and forgive you or whatever#no no NOOOOO#not reconciliation#sorry this is about ragbros
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Third Act Breakup
#dumb doodles#mario movie#mario#luigi#i think alot about luigi's lil 'hahaha greeeeat' response to bowser's 'i'm the guy whose gonna take over the world'#i mean i get it; he's under a lot of stress and fear in that moment but uh. yeah.#i think; as a regular person who probably just wants to go Home and has only seen the Worst of this brand new world#i don't think he cares too much if bowser takes it over; as long as he and his brother can go home in one piece; who cares???#it's not like they would have any sort of magic of their own or powerups to help them against a giant fire breathing turtl-#oh no. mario forgot to tell his brother he has a way to fight back without getting burnt to a crisp right away oh nooooo#and y'know....if we're getting mario at his rookie-ist; why not luigi at his most selfish/cowardly too???#this is an orgin story right? gimmie the brothers at their lowest/weakest/worst before they become the heros of the mushroom kingdom
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I have the same problem in tears of the kingdom that I did with breath of the wild
Said problem is my short attention span keeps driving me away from the plot and straight into every last cave I see
#I just wanna know the damn story I swear to god#I have so many questions but am I getting answers for them?#nooooo I’m helping stage a political coup in hateno instead#this game is so funny I love how weird it gets#tears of the kingdom#I’ve done only one dungeon hhhh
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dude have you seen skip and loafer. dude. harutakacore. dude,.
DUDE WHAT THE FUCK THIS FREAKED ME OUT I LITERALLY FINISHED READING THE MANGA LIKE 2 HOURS AGO actual reply in tags
#THIS ASK MADE ALL THE HAIRS ON MY ARM STAND UP#DO YOU FOLLOW ME ON MY SIDE TWITTER OR SOMETHING!!!!#oh also abt haru.taka core. their looks Yes. their personalities ummmm Barely#i think mitsumi and takane are both socially oblivious#and haruka and shima are people pleasers#BUT MITSUMI IS WAY TOO SELF AWARE AND SHIMA IS WAY TOO SELF UNAWARE (BC HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT HE WANTS)#while haruka is the self aware one and takane self unaware in their case. erm.#anyways THEIR CASUAL FRIENDSHIP REMINDS ME OF THEM FOR SURE THOUGH LOL#the chapter where shima buys mitsumi hand cream was extremely haruka and shintaro core. i kept imagining it. sorry.#like set in hs days ofc. haruka wanting to buy takane a gift and shintaro being like. been meaning to ask but are u and enomoto going out#haruka immediately like NOOOOO NONONONO THIS ISNT WEIRD WERE BESTIES U DONT GET IT!!!!!!!!!!#shintaro being like but you like her??? and there haruka isnt as quick to answer so shintaro's like oh got it and harukas like GOT WHAT???#anyways. that last part doesnt happen in the manga its from my delusions.#erm. READ SKIP TO LOAFER ITS SO GOOD I WAS GOING CRAZY ABT IT IN MY GC EARLIER my good buddy joey recommended it to me#it tackles relationships and friendships so perfectly and the artstyle is so nomnomnomnomnom ugh#ask tag#if youve only seenthe first ep i see how u see haru.taka core because SAME LOLLL#shimas voice fits haruka so well too#especially their first meeting that was SO haruka and takane core
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i love when i make plans with other people and im super on top of it and everyone agrees to the plan. and then lo and behold nobody else goes with the plan
#whatsupray?#i am. going feral right now#noooo i have to be understanding and nice about it? nooooo#dont make me further repress my emotions 😌#im speaking about both a specific instance that is happening rn and one that has been happening for months#dont you just hate it when you cant get people in line yourself because you're not in charge??#and the person in charge is an absolute pushover???#like. i could solve this issue in a week YOU'VE BEEN LETTING THEM WALK OVER YOU FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS AND MONTHS...#like you're being so nice to them WHAT ABOUT ME?? YOU KNOW I CARE ABOUT THIS MORE THAN THEY EVER COULD...#this is not a ohhh nobody feels badly about this situation if i dont put my foot down#this is a every passing week i am not only getting even more done with the other people i am getting MAD AT YOU.#oh no! i stopped asking for updates! i stopped caring!!#i stopped caring because I TOLD YOU THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS EVERY FUCKING TIME I TRY TO DO THINGS LIKE THIS#I CARE AND NOBODY ELSE DOES AND AFTER MONTHS I REALIZE IVE WASTED A YEAR OF MY LIFE
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pov: You’re Jonathan Byers trying not to lose his mind on the way to Indiana.
#Jonathan “I put us in this situation goddamn I wish I hadn’t” Byers#My man somwhere in Utah: There is no God except the one between Nancy’s legs#I like to think the whole time he was thinking about how he could’ve had a nice relaxing vacation in Hawkins but nooooo#Meanwhile his gf is in a stolen RV being told she needs to have 6 of her exes children#I truly believe that road trip made him change his mind and say I can go to Emerson actually#What was the ride from Nevada to Indiana like I need to know#I just know he cried in the motel shower somewhere in Kansas#Did my man have a single mixtap with him? Did he force everyone to sit in silence?#Did he desperately dial the radio hoping for an alternative station? Only for Mike to complain?#Jonathan internally playing Road to Nowhere by Talking Heads on loop#Were Mike and El like making out in the backseat while Will just sat there?#Or was it more awkward like Mike and El hadn’t officially broken up yet and Will was just sitting in the middle of them#Did Jonathan say fuck it and drive solo from Nevada to Indiana#Or did he and Argyle take shifts#Did they stop anywhere or was jonathan like no fuck it we’re going pee in the bottle idgaf#I really hope my boy gets a nap before the apocalypse it’s the least he deserves#Jonathan @ Nancy: I’ll tell you everything#Jonathan @ Nancy: I almost killed your brother seven times#Charlie Heaton is just out here like I have played this character for 6 years I know exactly what I’m doing#stranger things#jonathan byers#cali crew#st season 4
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Essentially what it is all boiling down to is I have fully realized I am bad at being a person, that will always be true, and I don’t know how to handle that
#I’m going to be depressing and self depreciating in the tags so. fair warning to anyone who reads them#I’ve known for a while now that I don’t know what to do with my life. I’ve thought of a few ideas but none of them seem to be working. and I#think a good chunk of what it’s boiling down to is that I am quite literally just stupid when it comes to an actual useful real life skills.#and it’s frustrating because I can’t even talk to ppl I know and confide in them that I feel dumb and stupid without them being like ‘nooooo#don’t say that! you’re not stupid! you were top of your class in hs!’ (that is their favorite thing to fall back on) but like. the thing is#I wasn’t even smart in hs. sure I did good but that’s because I cheated my way through and got lucky a lot. I never actually learned anythin#I never understood what I was being taught or how to apply it. I was good at English and art classes and that was it those were the only one#I truly felt I knew what I was doing in and grasped the subject matter well. I know I’m good at those two things and smart when it comes to#those subjects. but the thing is. in real life. both of those are useless skills. I can’t make money with them and it is highly unlikely#that will ever change. and yes I know not being able to make money with it doesn’t mean it’s useless but like it kinda does. capitalism#sucks. I know that. we all do. but that doesn’t change that we live in a capitalist society and it’s unlikely to actual change in my lifetim#so I’m stuck to try and figure out how to live in it. but I have no skills I can make money with so I will live my entire life poor and#miserable and working dead end jobs that make me want to kill myself. I’m not good at socialization I’m so fucking bad at it so I can’t work#any kind of job that hinges on networking or sales or human interaction which is MOST JOBS but I’m also too stupid for anything related to#STEM. I tried two different stem degrees and flunked out of both of them because I am a FUCKING IDIOT and I know there’s no point in trying#to go back to school for another one. but no degree in anything I naturally have a knack for will help me find a decent well paying job. ill#just be wasting my money to go to school for something like that. and then like. I don’t even think I’ll ever get married and I def won’t#ever have kids. so I can’t even put any hopeful stock in just being happy with a family one day. I know a lot of ppl who don’t like their#careers but they’re fine with that because they’re happy with their family but like I don’t even have that and I won’t ever have that. I#have NOTHING to strive for and NOTHING I am good at that’s meaningful I’m going to fail at having a career and a family and I know that#doesn’t mean I won’t be happy in theory but by societal standards I am and always will be a fucking failure of a person and since I do live#in this society yeah. it’s kinda fucking true. and I don’t know what to do about that. I’m just tired. I’m tired of being afraid and#struggling and going through patches of wanting to kill myself because of this because like what’s the point. I’ll never have anything#better so what in the actual hell is the point of me existing. and I know I’m being ridiculous and my brain is eating itself and none of#this is probably even true but that doesn’t change that it FEELS like it is a lot of times and esp right now and I don’t know what to do#to anyone who reads this I’ll be fine tbh prob as soon as tomorrow like dw about it I just need to get it out so I stop stewing in it.#I’m just. yeah. not having a great time rn but I left work so I’m gonna cry and then maybe sleep for a bit and hope that helps#kaz rambles
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getting in on intently focused research and excavation mode about the christmas extravaganza (and of course. namely: the wroles) last night of course meant ending up with my life in shambles, going to bed past 6am and having related dreams, finding some relevant lore and some irrelevant, and having fun and being myself
#sure can make a few posts already but lord lol. it's always Enrichment it's cool#ending up down some avenues stumbling across totally inadvertent info like i wasn't trying to learn where you honeymooned but congrats#i want to know about Your niche sometimes perhaps one night only xmas xtrav roles and perhaps Your photographs of them#[hours later before passing out] and that's the magic of the joe iconis christmas extravatacular#hot mess of delights and ''nooooo'' feels perfectly apropos
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