Man I just went through your fics tab and it was sooo hilarious thank you for the laughs I needed that.😂

This just made me imagine you laughing while reading the scene where Dick had to go cry in the shower because he accidentally ordered a pizza for Damian even though Damian was dead ASLDKJA. Hehe silly Dick. Ordering pizza for the dead heeheehee.

/post/718441984343293952/no-actually-im-mad-enough-about-it-to-speak-up when we do it people get mad and say that we're misunderstanding the characters and that we're so wrong and that it's fucking shit. i don't know what to do, i feel pressured to not fuck up

Anon imma give you my biggest secrets to fanfic writing, the ones that have carried me thru 15+ years of fic writing, of unwanted critics, of haters, and of little to no attention to my fics.

1) this is the most important one: write what makes YOU happy. Writing fanfic is a hobby and it should spark joy. It should make you happy. If this means you’re taking the big bad of the series and turning him into a baby that the heroes have to raise? Go for it. If it means a villain is your meow meow and you’re gonna rewrite the story to make him a good guy? Go for it. Whatever makes YOU happy. Because in the end, you are writing for yourself and for you to have fun. Yes validation is nice, but—

2) —but it’s not the end all, be all. It’s always so so sooooo good when people comment on your fics and leave you reviews and go nuts for your work. But I write for dead or niche fandoms and I rarely get attention on any of my work. And I made peace with that. You need to make peace with that. Validation is nice, but kudo/comments/hits are not the goal here: you having fun is.

3) ignore the haters. There are SO many gatekeepers in fandoms nowadays that it sucks the fun and joy out of life. Block them, don’t even reply, just block them. AO3 has mute and block buttons. Use them. And if they are extra rude? Report them. In the old days, we used to say “flames will be used to warm cold feet” which translates to “your hate is less than dirt” (flames here being haters and unwanted criticisms). It still applies.

4) this one is optional but: find like minded people! People who’d enjoy your work! People who you love discussing ideas with! It goes a long way to give motivation!

5) this one is hella important: it’s not ooc if it’s an au!! :) A person growing up in a war zone is gonna have very different experiences than a person growing up with parents who run a coffee shop and will have a different experience to growing up in an orphanage etc etc. and all of these things WILL affect a person’s behavior and will change how they interact with the world. Even if all those three scenarios had the same trauma (i.e. a fire), each one would react differently and would lose different things, which again, affects how they’d act.

6) BE ooc!! DO IT. Why? Because NO ONE is gonna write the character as “ic”’as the original writers/creators. The character in your head is different than the character in another person’s head, and in another’s, and so on. This is because our own lives and experiences affect the way we interact with the world—and fictional works. And working super hard to please the public means that someone out there will always go “that’s ooc how dare you.” You can never please everyone, remember that!

6.5) but also: write crackfic. It will help you break out of the fear of oocness so much. Even if you don’t write them, have crackfic ideas. They’re so good for your soul—humor is so good and cringe is dead.

7) and this is hella important: Anon you are human. Humans make mistakes. We fuck up. It’s how we learn and grow. And NO ONE was born perfect. Writing takes practice. Writing in character takes practice for every new character you write! It’s not easy! But you gotta trust yourself and your writing skills, and that requires practice too! Practice practice practice!!

So, TL;DR: Do what you want. Do what makes you happy. You are not being paid for this, and if people don’t like your writing, they can pay you to write exactly what they want. And fuck up as much as it takes for you to feel satisfied with the pieces your working with. And most important—aus and oocness go hand in hand.

I Don't Know How to Love Him, Pt. I

Bruce Banner x GenderNeutral!Reader, Set during the entirety of The Avengers. Part I of Unknown- will likely span all of Avengers, Age of Ultron, and Infinity War.

You are a former shield agent who gets dragged back into the business after Loki steals the tesseract. You meet a cast of fun characters along the way, and maybe even fall in love.

Word Count: 2,357

Contains: A reference to Sleipnir, Water-based powers, Meeting for the First time, fluff?, talk of blood pressure

Inspiration: I Don't Know How to Love Him from Jesus Christ, Superstar

Comments and Reblogs are appreciated! Thank you for reading.

You are not surprised when Nick Fury comes to visit you. There had been rumblings about a major incident at a Shield facility from your former colleagues- enough to make you concerned. Enough that Fury would try to drag you back into the life you left. Still, you're concerned when you see him sitting in your area, waiting for his order to be taken.

“My name is y/n, what can I start you with?” You ask, getting out your notepad ready to take his order.

“I’ll start with a coffee, black. And toast sliced diagonally.” He doesn’t look up at you, instead hiding his face behind the menu.

You smile, writing down the order as if it wasn’t code for something else, and reply, “Just a moment!” You walk over to the counter, where one of your coworkers is sitting. She is a teenager, bored out of her mind, waiting at the register for people to come up after they’ve finished eating.

“Hey, Sally. Something came up and I’ve got to run out of town for a bit. Let Karl know some family stuff came up- he’ll understand.”

“Does this mean I’ll have to cover the tables in your area?” She’s looking at you like you’ve just delivered the worst news of her life.

“No, I’m sure Chris can handle it. It’s a slow day. But Julie’s number is by the phone if you need to call in back-up.” You respond, taking off your apron and hanging it behind the counter.

You leave the building, giving a glance to Fury on your way out. You find his car almost immediately- its slick, clean and fortified- nothing like the other cars parked out front. You lean against the driver’s side door, waiting for him to exit. A few minutes later, he does.

“That bad, huh?” You ask

“Worse” He responds, walking towards you. You move out of the way and begin to walk around to the other side of the car.

“Glad you reached out, then.” You say, climbing into the passenger side.

There is silence as he begins to pull out of the parking lot.

“So. Aliens. Asgardian or Kree?” You ask.

“Asgardian, and just the one. Loki.”

“The trickster God? The one who got impregnated by a horse?”

“That’s the one. He’s got the tesseract.” Fury deadpans. You turn your head to look at the man you used to work for, who’s asking for your help.

“Were you doing experiments on the tesseract?” You ask.

He does not respond. You throw your head back and let out a sigh. “I never should’ve left”

“You shouldn’t have. But you did. And now you are back. I hope you enjoyed your time off, Commander.”

“Don’t call me that” You dismiss, “I assume I’m not the only one you’re retrieving for this mission. You didn’t call Carol, did you?”

“For someone who never met her you sure like to act as if you did, “ He retorts,” And no. I didn’t. She’s got bigger fish to fry.”

“So who else is on the team?” You ask again, just as you pull up to the airbase. You can see there is a quinjet waiting for you.

“Why don’t you see for yourself.” You grumble at him, staying silent for the rest of the time it takes to stop the car.

You begin to unbuckle and get out of the car when he adds, “I’ll meet you on the Helicarrier.”

“You have someplace to be, Director?”

“Just a few errands. Now go, or I’ll let the quinjet leave without you.” You roll your eyes at him and shut the door in his face, before making your way over to your new method of transportation.

A familiar face greets you as you step inside.

“Coulson. It’s great to see you, how have you been?” You pull him into a hug before he can respond.

“I’ve been great, Commander. You seem to have done, uh. Well for yourself.” He replies cheerfully but clearly confused by the outfit your wearing. You grimace at the use of that word again.

“New work uniform.” You glance down at yourself to see if it’s really that out of place compared to what he’s wearing- it is.

“Commander? Are you Navy?” Another voice asks. Coulson had been blocking your view up until this point, preventing you from seeing the unfrozen, unaged, and very much alive Steve Rogers. You had heard rumors from your old Shield pals but you weren’t expecting this. You lightly push Coulson out of the way to get closer to him.

“Coast Guard.”

Steve holds out his hand to shake yours. “Captain Steve Rogers.”

You accept and give a firm handshake, “Commander Y/n, though I prefer Y/n.”

“Y/n. Got it. Fury recruit you too?” At this point, both of you are ignoring Coulson, who has moved on to preparing the quinjet for take-off.

“Yes. Plucked me right out of retirement.”

“He brief you on the mission?” Steve’s eyes are examining you, trying to figure out how someone like you, who looks fairly young, could have already retired.

“Yes. Some powerful alien got ahold of the tesseract and plans to destroy the world. Very original.”

“I have some videos for you to watch of the other recruits, then.” Coulson interrupts your conversation to put on a video all about Bruce Banner and The Hulk. You aren’t surprised by his recruitment even if you find it a little dangerous. Bruce seems like a sweet man, but he’s got little control over the other man living inside him. You take a moment to pull Coulson aside while Steve is watching the video to talk about the legend sitting a few feet away from you.

“Were you not going to tell me that you unfroze Steve?” You whisper, indignant.

“I thought I let that leak to you through an old channel” Coulson defends himself.

“Well, ‘we found the ice cube and turned it into water' is not exactly the same as ‘We have defrosted Steve Rogers and he is exactly the same as he was during fucking World War II’”

You glance back at him to see he is still staring at the video. His body language tells you he’s listening to your conversation. You glare at Coulson before composing yourself and sitting back down in your seat. Steve and Coulson converse about the different ways people tried to recreate the Super Soldier serum over the years, and the importance of his old uniform nowadays.

Once the quinjet lands, you are greeted by yet another familiar face.

“Natasha, great to see you.” You do not go in for a hug, as you aren’t sure she’d like that. “Where’s Clint?”

“Loki has him.” The happiness you had deflated like a pierced balloon.

“Fury didn’t tell me that.”

“Agent Romanoff, Captain Rogers. And you already know Commander y/n.” Coulson interjects once again. You give him a sideways glance.

“Ma’am?” Steve responds.

“Hi.” Natasha glances at Coulson, “They need you on the bridge. They are starting the face trace.” He nods, “See you there” And walks away.

You see Bruce stumbling around towards the three of you, clearly trying to stay out of everyone’s way, but failing. Whatever Steve and Natasha are talking about, you’ve blocked out.

“Dr. Banner.” You call out to him, and he walks over. You watch as he shakes hands with the other two first, and then shakes your hand. You can feel how nervous he is.

“They told me you’d be coming,” He tells the other two, “but not you.”

“No reason not to. It’s not like I’m the most top-secret thing Fury has under wraps. Though I guess that means he didn’t tell you about me either?” You look at Natasha as you ask her this.

She nods, “I would’ve told Dr. Banner about you had I known”

“I’m starting to remember why I left.” You say, feeling the water beginning to gather on the fingertips of your left hand. You brush past Natasha and head for the bridge.

When you get there, you see Nick Fury standing in his circle of computers, giving commands to start getting the Helicarrier ready to fly. He knows you're there before he sees you- the sounds of your feet are heavy against the tile floors.

“What aren’t you telling me? And more importantly- what aren’t you telling them?” You are confrontational, and the water in your hand has now formed a ball, encircling your fists.

“Is this because I didn’t tell any of them about you?”

The water ball condenses into a ball of ice. He glances down at your hand and back at you and rolls his eyes. “You said not to tell anyone about you, unless-”

“Unless they needed to know. I don’t know about you, Fury, I think my new teammates need to know” His blood pressure has gone up, and so has the blood pressure of every person on the bridge. You sigh, evaporating your ice ball away. You feel everyone’s blood pressure slowly begin to return to normal

“Look,” You say, getting closer to him. “Bruce doesn’t need to think he’s the most dangerous one here. And I certainly don’t need sideways glances from everyone who doesn’t know about me” You whisper.

“Don’t worry, y/n. I’ve got a plan.” He replies loudly, as the others approach.

You grumble under your breath as you back away from him “You wouldn’t have treated Carol like this.”

“A plan for what?” Steve asks.

“Capturing Loki. We’re running facial recognition scans now. I’ll let you know if we find anything.” Fury expertly redirects your previous conversation to fit in with the priorities of the mission.

“For now, you can get comfortable. Explore the ship, find where you’ll be sleeping.” Coulson adds.

The newly formed group of superheroes nod and set off in mostly different directions. You head to your old hang-out spot on the Helicarrier you once called home: The state of the art lab. You always enjoyed the view it had, both of the outside of the ship and the interior. It was a good place to get lost in thought and an even better place to observe the other people on the ship as they walked through the hallway. You take a seat on one of the tables, prepared to get lost in thought and clear your mind when Bruce walks in.

“Oh, are you- I can go.” His face flushes and he nervously scratches the back of his head.

“It’s fine.” You respond.

He hesitates but enters the room, beginning to investigate the various tools now at his disposal. He avoids making any eye contact with you as he walks around the room, looking, but not touching. You can feel that his blood pressure is elevated- and you're pretty certain it’s because of your presence. Eventually, he makes his way to a computer by the large window, overlooking the outside of the Helicarrier.

“Do you know what any of this stuff does?” Bruce inquires.

“No idea. This wasn’t my division when I worked for Shield.”

“Then why come here?”

You shrug, “It’s quiet, and not many other people come in here.”

“So Shield has a state of the art lab on their invisible, flying ship that they don’t utilize?” Bruce is perplexed by this revelation.

“There’s more than one. This one is the smallest, and the most exposed.” You reply, gesturing towards all the windows.

He nods at this, then opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, but closes his mouth again.

“You’re wondering about why I’m here- on this mission.” You guess what he was trying to ask you about.

“Yes.”

“I’m back up. In case one of you dies, or goes off the rails.” You respond.

“So you’re here to make sure the other guy doesn’t go on a rampage” He seems a bit bitter about it, and his increasing blood pressure confirms that.

“That’s not the only reason. I’m also here in case Natasha or Steve kick the bucket, or if they decide to turn on us.” You are apathetic in your explanation.

“And how are you going to do that?”

“Do you want a glass of water?”

“Touchy subject? Don’t want to reveal your secrets?” He’s testing you, but he’s misunderstood why you asked the question.

“Quite the opposite.” You reply, forming a ball of water in your hand. You blow on it, sending it towards his direction. He reaches out to touch it, and you turn it into a ball of ice, which he quickly catches before it falls on the floor.

“How’d that happen?” Bruce is hoping for an interesting answer or a common experience in having an experiment gone wrong. But he would be wrong.

“I was born with it. At least, that’s what the Shield scientists think.” You bring back the ball of ice towards you, before evaporating it.

“So you’ve always had these powers?”

“Nope. They came with puberty.”

“So they think there’s some kind of gene that altered your genetic code giving you these special abilities that activated at puberty?” Bruce asks.

“Pretty much.”

“I’m assuming your life became pretty water-based after that” Bruce surmises.

“Essentially. It’s why I went into the Coast Guard. That’s how Shield discovered me.”

“Why not the Navy?” It’s a valid question, one you’ve fielded since you were a teenager about to graduate from high school.

“Coast Guard helps more with civilian rescue operations, less with tactical military strikes. It’s less prestigious-”

“Which means a lower likelihood of your powers being discovered.” He finished your sentence.

“Exactly. You understand.” By now, his blood pressure has come down and is more even, suggesting he’s calm. His eyebrow furrows in deep thought, as you sit in silence waiting for him to ask an obvious question.

“How do your powers affect the human body?”

“Well, Bruce. You tell me.” You begin, hopping down from the table you’d been sitting on. “The human body is 60% water.” You leave the room, allowing him to figure out for himself what kind of destruction you’d be able to cause. You already know the answer

The Peepshow (chapter two)

Summary: Two months after his redemption journey, Sasuke is back to Konoha and Sakura couldn’t be more happy about them spending a lot of time together. However, things take a hard turn when Sakura is assigned a special mission and she has to hide it from the rest of Team 7. Everything comes spiraling down when Sasuke finds out exactly what she has to do. 

Tags: hard rated m, blank period, kinda AU-ish

Chapter one here, ffnet, Ao3.

Next chapter

Author's notes: An alternate title to this chapter could be "take a drink everytime sasuke activates his sharingan because of sakura" ;) I tried to keep my boy as much as in character as possible! My girl Saku is easier to approach thought wise. This the point of the three chaptered fic that things really take off :P Man, writing pole dancing is HARD ;) Enjoy some slowburn denial seduction sasusaku with a dose of humor, my loves! Also, big thank to everyone who read this, especially to those who left lovely comments! Thank you so much for your support! :D See ya next week! Just in case, english is not my first language and this chapter is only edited by me :D

“Act two: Seducing one jealous Uchiha”

Sasuke Uchiha, for the first time in years, sees red.

He feels his eye power activate before he can control it as his chakra flares at the images flashing before him.

Sakura, his lovely Sakura, up the stage right in front the pole, looking straight at him in the most alluring way possible. Her body on full display and her face looking so different from her usual choice of make up he almost would tell you this is not her. But, those unmistakably beautiful eyes belong only to one person.

The glass of whiskey in his hand is close to breaking when Kakashi's voice cuts through his rage filled haze.

"Sasuke, stop." His mentor warns in a serious voice, just in time before they are detected by other people. It has the desired effect because Sasuke deactivates his sharingan instantly.

Naruto places his arm on his friend's stump, feeling the chakra pulsating there. The blond man says nothing although a crease in his brow has formed. He looks at Sasuke worriedly awaiting his reaction, averting his eyes from the stage where Sakura is dancing as if she does not have a care in the world.

Sasuke is clenching his jaw so hard, his teeth are aching from the pressure he is putting them on. He cannot believe what his eyes are seeing right now. Sakura who is supposed to be back in Konoha is up there on stage dancing for a target she is supposed to seduce and she has not told him a single fucking thing about this.

In fact, no, she lied to him and told him she would be staying at Tsunade for some medical bullshit she supposedly had to do with her mentor. He remembers the fifth Hokage calling him an arrogant brat for disliking this kind of mission.

Taking a deep breath, he tries to calm his nerves, before he does something risky.

He feels his heart beating ridiculously fast in his chest for some reason as he looks up at the stage. Trying to see her face, he wants her to look him in the eye and tell him how does she feel now that she is making him hurt.

Does she not trust him enough with this information that she knew could potentially affect what they have? Why did she have to lie about it? Sasuke knows that there is some shinobi mission confidentiality, but they both know between them the barrier is drawn and she could tell him anything. Especially something that could potentially strain their feelings. Maybe knowing his nature she knew he would not like what she would have to do, but the outcome is the same anyways. Is he supposed to feel like this? What is the word again? Jealous, he thought.

Sasuke clicks his tongue and ticks his head to the right side. "I see," he says in venomous voice, uncharacteristic of him nowadays.

Acting unbothered, his eyes stay focused on the stage where the most important woman in his life is dressed in a skimpy lingerie trying to bait the target with her high class skills.

Naruto shakes his head knowingly and rests his forehead on his open palm, leaning on the armchair he is sitting on. "Man, this is bad," he says mournfully.

Kakashi finally breaks the ice by speaking again, trying to mend things in the worst way possible, "Damn didn't know she had it in her."

The gray haired man feels the Uchiha's rage before the sizzling stare reaches him.

"Shut it," Sasuke mutters angrily.

All their heads turn instantly when they hear a man shout in excitement exclaiming how hot Sakura is by throwing a bunch of money her way.

Sasuke feels the beginnings of a headache starting to form.

The heavy beat of the song is pounding strongly in his ears and he cannot help it when his eyes focus on Sakura once again. If he is being completely honest with himself, he did not know she had it in her either.

If you had told Sakura Haruno in the past that she would be pole dancing in front of Sasuke Uchiha, she would laughed straight at your face and call you an idiot.

But now, as she grinds her hips on the pole, she feels like she is the idiot. And the butt of her own jokes apparently.

She is really feeling herself actually. The lingerie she is wearing is top notch and it fits her body perfectly like it was made for her. It is dark red in color with stripes both on her chest and belly creating Xs. Her heels are not killing her like she imagined they would and she really likes the sparkle in them. And even though she is starting to sweat, she knows her make up will stay in place because she put all her time and effort on it to make it look bomb. It does look amazing on her as it accentuates her eyes in the best way possible. A red lip and black smokey look will do that to your face. Sakura also thinks her long curly hair really added a whole new vibe to her look.

Sakura grabs the steel in front of her and arches back. She rolls her head, moving her body and spinning around the pole. Her chest glistens teasingly thanks to the light and she pushes her hips forward to gain some momentum. She abandons the pole for now and dances a little around the stage to gain the attention of the crowd.

Stepping left and right, Sakura juts her pelvic side to side to create some form of belly dancing while her hands feel her body sensually, at last leading them to course through hair in an attempt to look sexier.

With all that effort she really feels like she is actually Misty Jade, the persona she is supposed to be impersonating. The pink haired ninja puts her hands on her hips and poses seductively. She looks around and spots her target right away.

Time to put on a show, she thinks bitterly and lifts her hands in air to grab the pole behind her. She pushes her butt against the pole and leans back in an effort to look like she is trapped and the pole is like a man who is holding her captive in a stimulating pose.

A happy yell confirms her move had the desired effect both on the crowd and the target as well.

But as she feels that familiar hot stare on her, she also knows how she fucked up big time. It seems her move had another effect as well. The making Uchiha very angry, hot, and bothered effect.

When she looks in his direction, Sakura regrets it immediately. Even though he is at the back of the club, she would recognize him right away no matter how far he is or what clothes he wears. She does not like the expression on his face one bit.

The moment she had turned around after being introduced she had felt his chakra spike up. It intrigued her how she had that effect on him when she knows for a fact the man is super calm and collected. Sakura will not lie to herself and pretend like she did not take great enjoyment from the fact that he reacted like that to her.

But, but, but.

He is very angry with her right now and it is apparent.

Sakura closes her eyes and pretends everything is fine. She knows the other members of Team 7, who look a lot more at peace than he is, will handle him if he gets too upset.

She decides it is time for some impressive tricks that will need her to use some core strength. She makes a quick spin with her hips sticking out and she starts to circle the pole and like it is a prey and she is ready to pounce. Her left hand reaches up and grabs the top of the metallic bar while she puts all her strength in her right hand which grabs the lower part near the base. Then, her left leg comes forward and almost warps around the pole.

Sakura closes her eyes as her right leg pushes her forward and the rest of her body gets send upwards. The beautiful woman feels her hair falling down to her face obscuring it from view for a few agonizing seconds as she stays upside down. With both legs secured on the poll she begins her ascend upwards trying to match her movements with the beat of the song to gain some momentum.

After climbing on top of the pole, Sakura starts spinning around using her hands as leverage. Putting her body in a fetal position, she locks her thighs together and descends towards the ground with her hands upwards pretending like she is falling down from the pole.

In flash, she squeezes her thighs together in an attempt to stop her body from falling down. Right before she reaches the base of the stage, her impeding fall halts.

With her body now close to the ground, she loosens and throws herself in compromising position on the floor. Her palms are flat on the stage, her chest squished together between concrete and her body. Her ass is high up in the air and she slowly goes forward like she is cat crawling her way towards the front row.

In the meantime the crowd has completely lost it. It takes athletic skills to do that and everyone is impressed.

Halfway through the song now with the performance reaching its peak, Sakura decides to pull out the big guns. In order to gain the attention of the target specifically, she will need to find a way to get him to focus on her. Even though he found her skills highly admirable, to him, she was just another girl pole dancing. That is why she has to act interested in him first.

Right now, Misao Takashi is smoking a cigarette like there is no care in the world and he is looking down at some papers.

Way to be inconspicuous, Sakura thought, dropping into a split right at the edge of the stage.

On the other side of the club, right at the back, Naruto is about to cry. He is so confused at the moment, it is not even funny. On one hand, he is really shocked by Sakura and the unknown skills she is displaying, however, he finds himself inwardly cringing because while she is very good at it, he sees her as a very dear friend to him. While he wants to hype her up because she is very impressive, he also wants to go up there and drag her far away from the leeching crowd and hide her from the world with a really big blanket.

On the other hand, he is very scared, because Sasuke Uchiha is about to have the biggest bitch fit of the year right next to him.

The blond man looks at his teacher for comfort only to find him staring him back with a desperate expression on his face which means he is also having a similar thought process. This leads to them having a battle of wills, holding intense eye contact, until one of them crumbles and has to be the one to take care of the green eyed monster that is Sasuke Uchiha.

"Both." Naruto silently mouths, pleading, not wanting to deal with this alone.

Kakashi clears his throat, taking the first step.

"Well, Sasuke, it looks like we won't be needed here," He says in a casual tone, although his voice cracks during the dialogue due to the fact the situation is awkward.

He feels uncomfortable, but he continues on speaking, "The Anbu specialist," he raises his tone slightly at this as if to reprimand him, "is doing a pretty good job on her own."

He folds his hands on top of his crossed knees after finishing his statement.

"I said help, not kill us," Naruto sweat drops and half whispers more to himself than anybody else.

They both hear Sasuke silently growl at this.

Naruto gulps down his saliva loudly and begins, "Look Sasuke, I know this looks bad," he pauses checking for a reaction. Seeing his friend only slightly pissed, he continues, "But, you have to look at the positive side!"

The black haired man looks at his best friend for a split second, his eyes glinting in the dark and says, "And that is?", he questions angrily.

"It is th-the fact that Sakura-chan is strong and she can handle herself!", he tries to explain lamely, "right Kakashi-sensei?"

"Of course, yes." Kakashi agrees quickly.

Sasuke sticks his tongue inside his cheek, pushing it outwards, trying to remain calm.

He wants to curse them, throw water at them or maybe punch them both in the throat, but he will not do it because Sakura would not want that.

His attention diverts back to her dancing on the stage.

"Tsk," he lets out a familiar annoyed sound.

Right at that moment, she decides it is the perfect time to do a split on the floor.

Sasuke feels a vein popping on his forehead while the other two screech like school girls next to him.

He watches as Sakura takes another route to her seduction game and she starts to rely on more sexual tactics. The last Uchiha observes as she starts to sensually rub her back against the pole, her knees slightly bend forward, in an almost squat.

Her right hand goes to her mouth, and she darts her tongue out as if to lick her long manicured fingers while she stares hotly at her target with hooded eyes. In the meantime, her free hand dangles teasingly in front of her torso and begins its descend down towards her pelvic area. Her green nails a stark contrast to her daring burgundy lingerie.

Sasuke almost wants to activate his sharingan just so he could commit that image to his memory forever. He has never felt more jealous and needy than in that moment.

Despite all this unfolding before his eyes, he know this is just a mission, but he cannot help the emotions he is feeling.

The song is about to end, but he knows the torture will not end here. It will continue when she shows up again to lure her target away.

He cannot help but stare as she strikes a pose around the pole; her legs crossed around it and her body circled around the rod like snake hanging from a tree. Her arms are stretched out evenly and her voluminous hair hangs from one side.

Sakura looks amazing, her abs straining against her skin and her muscles showing in all the right places. His imagination of her naked body did not do the real thing justice; so much beauty on that tiny body of hers.

Sasuke heaves a sigh of relief just as the songs ends and the crowd cheers like never before.

"Finally," Kakashi whispers, coursing his hand through his hair.

Naruto plops down on the armchair loudly after hanging on the edge of it for so long.

It feels like a relief for all of them, but they know it is far from over. The lights of the stage close and Sakura disappears in the darkness. Their trained ears hear her heels clanking away despite the buzz she left behind. Everyone is complimenting her and the target looks very interested in her, as his eyes keep searching for her ever since the lights have opened again.

"Op, there it is, it worked, he is into her," Kakashi comments. The red haired male just signaled at a bartender - possibly asking for her company.

"Of course he liked her," Naruto shouts and stretches his hands out in exasperation, "oh my god she looked amazing, I can't believe I just witnessed that," the blond continues to mumble incoherently about their female teammate.

"Did you see that?", The tailed beast owner exclaims loudly, hands coming at top of his head in silent plea for salvation. From the corner of his blue eye, he anticipates his friend's reaction.

"I did," Sasuke responds, "fuck, I know, I did, okay," he says, his voice raising an octave.

He knows the other did it on purpose to gauge a reaction out of him, but he cannot keep hiding from them anymore. It is obvious they both know how he feels about her; except for Sakura of course.

"Op, there it is again," Kakashi jokes this time, his mask hiding his grin. He takes great pleasure in watching his greatest student fall apart in front of him.

"You are both enjoying this, aren't you?", Sasuke asks a question he knows the answer to. He is grimacing, trying to wallow in self pity alone.

"Of course we are," Naruto answers proudly,"have you seen your face?", he wriggles his eyebrows and points an accusing finger at Sasuke's face.

"I hate you both," He says detestably, "Leave me alone."

Before any more banter could continue however, they notice Sakura walking out of the changing rooms in a nice long dress with a slit on the side. It is light pink in color, almost transparent, and it has fuchsia fur on its collar. She is strutting towards the red haired man in very determined steps, getting his attention right away. The pink haired girl sits next to the target and strikes conversation. They watch the scene play out like movie, their eyes and ears alert and attune to everything those two do. Whenever he or she moves, their attention is solely on them - like a hawk which is watching its prey.

Sasuke focuses on Sakura, his eyes calculating every move she makes. He watches as the civilian says something probably funny to her and she laughs heartily, one hand covering her mouth. The woman cocks her head to her right cutely and she blinks her pretty eyes at him while her other hand which is not covering her mouth works in other dirtier ways.

Touch is very important in order to seduce any man. She pats his knee in an attempt to hold her laughter in. To any other person it looks like she is enjoying his company and she is comfortable with him.

But, Sasuke knows, this is her way of making him fall right into her beautifully crafted trap. Her subtle flirting looks like it is working because they both decide to get up at that moment. He does not have a clue what she could have possibly said to him, but the foolish guy grabs her extended hand and follows her to the back rooms.

"She is going in for the kill," Kakashi speaks suddenly, "we better stay alert now in case something bad happens."

It seems he is not the only one interested in how things play out.

The black haired man feels the temperature of the room skyrocket to new heights and he decides it is high time he took off his jacket. In one swift movement the annoying garment is off him and he undoes one more button of his blouse which is straining against his chest.

"Ugh I don't like this at all," Naruto whines and chooses to look anywhere else to divert his attention from Sakura.

Sasuke sits up straighter on his chair, finishes his drink in one shot and puts the empty glass on the nearby table. He feels his throat burning from the sudden consumption of the strong alcoholic beverage. The Uchiha welcomes the pain and cracks his neck to the side.

Kakashi raises an eyebrow at this and he inches his body closer to the outer part of his armchair as if he is ready to get up at any given moment. Naruto quickly catches on and puts his hand on top of Sasuke's bicep.

He grabs the flimsy material of his white shirt, but rearranges his hand in flash in order to grip Sasuke better.

"No," Naruto warns.

The blond's palm discreetly emits some chakra, trying to cool down the raging Uchiha.

Sasuke turns to look at them, his mismatched eyes cold and detached. They see his rinnegan flash in the dark despite being hidden by his fringe.

The brooding male shakes his head slightly and looks down. "I am only going to make things faster," he tries to reason with them.

"Sasuke, no," Kakashi tries to explain calmly. They must not alert anyone in here with their status or their cover will be blown. "We are the back-up, remember?"

"My abilities are more useful than Sakura's right now." Sasuke continues as if he did not hear them, "One look from me and it's over. Tsunade should have thought this through better."

"Sakura-chan can do this, bastard," Naruto speaks in a serious tone and continues, "Don't ruin this for her."

Sasuke stays still for a few seconds, his immobile form having both men on edge.

Before any of them could react fast enough though, they feel Sasuke's chakra flare and they see him disappear in a flash right in front of their eyes. In his place there is a broken bottle of vodka on the armchair.

"Fuck," Naruto curses and Kakashi lets out an indignant sound.

They avert their eyes from the bottle and look towards the changing rooms near the bar. Sasuke smirks, the purple stardust of his eye power blending in with the lights. He bends his head down and steps inside the dark entrance into the hallway behind him.

From their periphery they have no idea what it is going on in there anymore.

Naruto lifts his hands up in the air and says, "I give up."

"I have to admit these events unfolding before me have a more interesting plot than the Icha-Icha Paradise books," Kakashi shrugs his shoulders.

Both of them let out long sighs and fall back into their armchairs.

Meanwhile inside the changing rooms, Sakura has led her target in the quiet corner of her room. She has him pinned against the wall, kunai against his throat, her chakra infused fist holding him captive by his shirt.

"Tell me everything I need to know if you want to live to see another day," she spits out, her glare a complete one eighty compared to the sweet eyes she was batting at him earlier.

"I-I- Who are you lady?" The man trembles in her grip, her threat working.

Sakura pushes him harder against the wall to make him hurt.

"Quit stalling," She keeps the kunai on his throat as her other hand searches his pockets for the key and the papers. "What information do have?" The kunoichi in disguise asks and feels the cold metal of the keys at the tips of her fingers.

Just when she was about to get the juicy info out of him, Sakura feels Sasuke's strong chakra presence behind her.

"You heard her," his velvety baritone voice comes through as he flash steps behind them, both of his eye prowess glinting dangerously in the dark.

The man in question is sweating profusely now as he is faced with two scary looking ninja who look to be very powerful. He knows if he spills out the information the feud lords will come for his ass, but right now as he feels the tip of the kunai on his throat and looks at the threatening eyes of the man next to his beholder, he knows he is dead either way.

"I will tell you everything," He pleads, "don't kill me!"

The red haired man's knees buckle beneath him and he falls down to the ground with a thud. Sakura lets him fall, huffs and stands back.

As she crosses her arms in front of her chest, Sasuke bends down to be at eye level with the target and activates his sharingan, tomoes spinning lazily.

"I could do this on my own, you know," Sakura says annoyed. She is pursing her lips, her eyes going to slits.

"I know," Sasuke admits and stands up. The man on the floor is under a genjutsu, spilling all the information they need.

Sasuke's sharingan still activated records everything the man says that is useful to them. Sakura dangles the keys and puts them inside her pouch. With the man passed out on the floor, Sasuke and Sakura hold eye contact for a few minutes, both silent.

"How did you get in here without me noticing?" She breaks the silence first, taking a few steps closer to the black haired shinobi.

"I concealed my chakra well," Sasuke says laconically, glad for his nimble fingers because he locked the door silently as well.

Sakura hates the way he is so aloof about this as if he did not interrupt her own mission. She is so pissed off right now, the woman can barely hold her wits together. The kunoichi feels herself popping off the moment Sasuke decides to turn his back on her.

"I am not a weak little girl anymore," She spits out fiercely, trying to keep her tone down, "I don't need you going all macho on me!"

Her dress flutters around when she moves suddenly and starts pacing around the room. Sasuke looks at her from the corner of his eye, his visual power no longer activated.

He pretends to ignore her anger and stays mute instead. Unfortunately for her, Sasuke could not help himself and stay put. His jealousy pushed him to go in here with her because the thought of another man even possibly touching her sent him reeling.

Sasuke is glad nothing more had to happen, but god, he is such a coward still and he will not admit to her right now why he did it. He knows she is strong, but her being alone with somebody else, anybody else who is not him...It is eating him away from the inside.

Sakura is furious right now, but she also knows she cannot make a scene in here because someone could come in without warning and start asking questions. They have a man passed out on the floor who is going to arise some suspicions.

Analyzing the situation, she needs to think fast and act later.

Putting her hands on her hips and giving him the angriest bitch face she could master, Sakura barks out her order.

"Go inform the guys the mission is accomplished and we leave tomorrow at dawn," she looks at him expectantly, waiting for him to try and defy her.

When she gets nothing but silence in response, she continues.

"Meet me outside across the street in twenty minutes," Sakura finishes her statement with a dismissive tone.

The pink haired medic raises her eyebrow at him, waiting for him to react.

Sasuke makes his usual humming noise in agreement, his lips slightly pursed. With a curt nod he leaves the room quickly, not once looking behind.

With the door now closed, Sakura lets out a silent growl. In her frustration she takes off one of her high heels and throws it across the room, her target where Sasuke was standing a few seconds ago. Disappointed that she did not hit his imaginary head, she tosses the other one too for a good measure.

Feeling accomplished, she gathers her stuff including the important papers and the keys and she changes to the civilian clothes she had brought with her. Seeing Misao Takashi slightly stirring, she takes that as her cue to leave. With one last look at him, confident that he will not have the guts to speak to anyone about this, she exits the room.

When the red haired male wakes up a few minutes later, he stands up groggily and looks around the room only to find it empty. Checking his pockets and realizing everything is missing, he recalls the events from before. That is when he takes a look at the mirror across him and he notices the gorgeous girl from before has left him a message.

A smiley face drawn with red lipstick is staring back at him.

He snorts and lets out a sad smile.

Twenty minutes later as promised everybody is out of the club with only Sakura still missing. Ever since Sasuke came back with the news no one has exchanged words besides Kakashi and Naruto who keep talking to each other.

The last Uchiha has been oddly quiet even for his standards. He keeps his face mostly hidden in the shadows of the night, his back against a nearby wall. Kakashi and Naruto are a few meters next to him throwing worried glances at him, fearing one word from them would set him off the wrong way.

The moment Sakura appears, it seems the gears in Sasuke's head have finished turning and he stands up straight ready to take off. The awkwardness in Team seven is palpable.

No one dares to look their female teammate in the eye, even Kakashi who is older than them. They do not speak to each other either. Instead, the male members of the group start following Sakura who is probably leading them to the hotel she has been staying. Sakura looks calm, but everybody seems to know that they should not try to cross her or strike a conversation with her.

Naruto who is usually lively and talkative feels like he is living his worst nightmare. He exchanges a few glances with Kakashi who keeps putting his finger in his mouth as if to signal the blond to keep quiet. Things are so awkward between the medic and the sharingan user that Naruto feels like a literal child confined between his two stubborn and angry grown up parents. Fuck being a third wheel to a conceited flirting Uchiha and a shy Haruno, this is so much worse.

Only when they finally reach the hotel and they forced to say their good nights, the Team manages to acknowledge and speak to each other. Of course it is typical conversation before you go to bed, so nothing weird here. Albeit, it was so disturbing to see Sakura faking a smile nowadays that Naruto wanted to bash Sasuke's head to the nearest wall for making this mission more awkward than it had to be. Thinking better than to try and talk to Sasuke about the situation right now, Naruto heads solemnly to his room.

Kakashi on other hand feels like those two are grown up adults and he should not have to interfere with their feelings. They have to work on their miscommunications on their own, especially Sasuke and his incapability to express his feelings.

With each person having their own thoughts in their heads, the members of Team 7 all go into their rooms respectively.

The moment Sakura steps inside the room, she starts to feel her tear ducts watering. Taking a deep breath in order to calm down, she starts pacing around the room while fanning her eyes.

In these kind of situations it always helps to think of something else to prevent her from crying, so she thinks about Ino and her holy grail set of girl rules.

"Never cry when you have expensive make up on," Sakura tries to pep talk herself.

Although she knows she will have to take it off eventually, she tries to hang on the smallest reason to stop herself from tearing up. If she slips up and allows herself to get sad, the woman knows it will be impossible to stop.

Sakura does have a tendency to get emotional despite being strong. Being apathetic is not one of her strongest assets, regrettably. In comparison to the man she is in love with, the pink haired beauty is quite the opposite of him when it comes to matters like these.

Thinking a good bath will clean her head (and her body), she steps inside the bathroom. Half an hour later, she comes out of it clean and fresh wearing her skimpy black pajama shorts and a white t-shirt. Knowing no one will come and bother her anymore tonight she skips putting on her bra.

Feeling rejuvenated and ready to go to sleep, Sakura starts making a beeline for her bed. She will figure out tomorrow what to do about her strained relationship with Sasuke.

Right just about that thought crossed her mind, she hears knocking on her door.

"No," the woman whispers, her eyes widening in horror.

There is no way Sasuke is behind that door, knocking it and expecting her to open up.

With two powerful stomps and a determined expression on her face, Sakura reaches for the doorknob and pulls.

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE ;   mun & muse - meme .

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

my muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless 

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

how strictly do you follow canon? 　i try to follow canon as much as possible for shinji in nge. for rebuild, mostly, only bc nge is my main version of shinji. it’s been a while since i read the manga, and there’s definitely stuff to like about it, but imo sadamoto’s writing there isn’t as good as anno’s is in nge ( and rebuild... to an extent ), so i’d probably end up changing some details for manga!shinji with whatever headcanons if i wrote him more often / went into depth about things? but it’s still interesting to see how different shinji and kaworu ( + other characters ) are in the manga, and new dynamics can be fun!!

SELL YOUR MUSE! aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.    lemme try and sell you nge first unless you’ve already sold your soul to it LOL join me.... tldr it’s a classic anime and still relevant today despite it being like 24 years old ( with tons of merch now most i would shamelessly buy ). there’s so many characters that feel real and human in nge. hideaki anno poured too much of his heart and soul into it, the reflections of himself and his personal feelings feel very raw. i could also try to sell you like every nge character bc they’re all so well written but mha;lskdjf on to the last point. being the main character for eva, shinji is iconic too... he’s among the best leads i’ve seen in anime. most critics will agree and have agreed with this for decades ( if you only ask me, he’s number one for everything bc i’m biased af ❤ ). i talk too much about how he’s bby / cute and does his best, but probably not enough about how flawed he is as a person too, his deeper wants and needs, and when those things go horribly wrong. the duality is really what makes shinji complex and human. also bonus points!! he’s frequently scored at the top for fav anime characters in japan since ‘95 in newtype and stuff n_n

now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting ( even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think? ).    next to louder and more colourful characters like asuka, for example, shinji can come off as quiet and boring ( especially compared to traditional hot blooded mecha protagonists in general ). shinji isn’t a genius or leader. he’s super passive, introverted, shy, and bad at fun conversations. he saves the world and tries to do the right thing, so by definition, he’s a hero--- but he’s also just a boy who’s gone through a lot. he has a lot of depth and hidden anger / feelings in general, but it would take a lot for him ( i.e. pressure, circumstances ) to express that outwardly--- daily shinji isn’t really like that. fandom wise, i think shinji recently came in 4th in the NHK eva popularity contest, so that’s pretty good, people do like him there. kawoshin is also as popular as ever ( and i’ve also seen more shinji fans in the western side too ). meanwhile old nge fandom be like ‘shinji u loser get in the fucking robot!!!111 ur surrounded by hot chicks every single day and still cry wow’ but that’s more like an ironic meme nowadays LOL

what inspired you to rp your muse?    i finally watched eva properly like two years ago?? ( too late 4 kawoshin 2015 fandom q-q ) it was good so i sold my soul to it and shinji mhasdflkj

what keeps your inspiration going?    eva being my fav anime and shinji my fav character, seeing fanworks of eva, and ofc everyone who interacts with me here on my blog q-q bless u and thank u

some more personal questions for the mun .

give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO ( sometimes )

do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO.

do you think a lot about your muse during the day?  YES / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO ( sort of?? )

are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?    yes to respectful and constructive criticism!! but i’m still pretty circumstantial about it for my comfort ( just to avoid random ppl being rude etc ), so i think i’d prefer to reblog a meme for that and / or ask for opinions and tips from my mutuals!

do you like questions, which help you explore your character?    yesss, i think most of us would love that n_n both unprompted and reblogged memes work for me

if someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?    i’m a private blog, so if it’s more of a plot based headcanon that a mutual wanted to discuss for fun and in a friendly way, then ok! i think there’d be room for constructive discussion there ( ah yes eva and its 24 years of pepe silvia meme.png complex lore discussion still going strong ) 

if someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it? ���similar to the above and the constructive criticism thing, i’ll only care / be open to discussing that kinda stuff if we’re mutuals and if you’ve seen eva, etc. 

if someone really hates your character, how do you take it?    as seriously as a funny meme when it comes to randos LOL buuuut long answer too: i’ve also seen passionately mean spirited, usually terrible and equally as unironic takes about shinji on the internet bc that’s the internet sometimes rip. this version of hate is more annoying and can suck just to look at, especially if it gets lots of attention in the form of agreement ( it usually makes me think, did we even watch the same show ). but also arguing endlessly with whoever wrote it / believes it would suck even more ( being a waste of time for one ). i guess that’s one reason why i care more about the personal safe space i’m trying to create on my dashboard etc. and people have very different opinions about anything in general. but basically, in general, this: if someone hates x or y fictional character with such a burning passion, and they won’t be satisfied unless they try to convince others to hate them too, or say that fans of x or y character are bad people irl and belittle said fans for it on their own time ( or openly harass those fans ), and if they’re crusading this idea, constantly?? block, blacklist, report for harassment if noted, filter it out--- it’s definitely better to stay away from that kind of negativity ( also bc it’s absurd and necessary ). i question anyone who finds joy / importance in trying to police the content and comfort of others, but i also know that they wouldn’t have fun hanging out with me LOL kaworu vc surround yourself with people who love shinji ikari 

are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?    sure, once in a while is fine, especially if i made a typo or something that makes the context or anything confusing / unclear!

do you think you are easy going as a mun?    i try to be!! despite that longer rant just now mhas;ldkfj thanks for reading this far if you still are LOL 

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

tagged by: @skyvar​ aka the creator n_n thank you omg?? this was awesome!! tagging: if you wanna!

The Happiest Accident: a Conversation With Motel 7 [Q&A]

Photo: Paris Brosnan

Anton Khabbaz and Dylan Jagger Lee’s collaborative project, Motel 7, is nothing short of a happy accident. Developed from an allegiance to authenticity and a genuine love of creating music, the two writers and producers have given themselves time and space to evolve their ever-changing sound. Their most recent single, “Things I Hate,” arrives as a young adult’s exposé on the chaotic moments we are so heavily consumed by, regardless of their regretful outcomes. We had the chance to sit down with Dylan and Anton of Motel 7 to discuss the duo’s formation, their latest single, and striving to create timeless music without thinking too much.

Ones To Watch: OK, let’s start from the beginning. Dylan, why don’t you tell us who Motel 7 is and how the duo came to be?

Dylan: Ok, well Motel 7… The way we always describe it is, “the biggest happy accident of all time.” So, essentially we both were working on music, separate projects, both in the EDM space, like making dance music, so we went to school and met each other at this place called Icon Collective and we connected over a different style of music than everyone else was doing. So, we were like, “let’s hang out, let’s make some music.” One day, we went to my house and sat in the living room, had no idea we could sing and just said, “yo, let’s turn some autotune on,” see what it sounds like… see if we can sing, see if we can even do this. Then we wrote this one song, we put it up on Soundcloud and we forgot about it. So two months, three months later, we were like, “what the fuck? The song has 100,000 plays, what happened? This is so weird.” So, I said we have to call it something and Anton said, “let’s just call it Motel 6.” Or maybe I said Motel 6 and he was like, “No, it’s already taken. There’s already a Motel 6… what about seven? Motel 7?” And so we were just like, “OK, it’s called Motel 7.” 

And then we [decided] we should take the song off of Soundcloud, let’s put it on Spotify since it’s working, obviously. You know, something’s happening. Then we came back, and it had 100,000 plays there. Then we just started putting out more music, started taking it more seriously. It just became a creative outlet for us, because we were both doing different music and no one knew who we were. It was just fun to do whatever we wanted with no pressure. And then, all of a sudden, it started actually working and then labels were hitting us up, management were hitting us up. We never expected Motel 7 to even be a thing and here we are. Motel 7 is just a creative outlet, a happy accident, that turned into this.

So it’s been two years since you first put out that track on Soundcloud?

Anton: I think it was 2018 actually, but we didn’t start taking it seriously, or kind of seriously, until two years ago.

Dylan: I mean, realistically, we didn’t have a team behind us until, like…

Anton: Like months ago. 

Dylan: It was really just a… let’s make music for fun, forget about it, put it out. Motel 7 wasn’t going to come and catch us one day… I mean, we’re just so happy to do it now, and it's really exciting because this thing that felt so organic and natural is now something we get to pursue. 

Anton: We always felt like it had potential to do things and we were kind of, like, scared of it. Like, shoot, we’re kind of just doing this for fun and not telling people we’re singing on these tracks, so if it does go somewhere, then we’re going to have to go play shows and like, now we’re kind of in that situation. We have a manager and it’s just kind of crazy to be making music and then taking Motel 7 very seriously as our main thing right now.

Your new single, “Things I Hate,” follows your singles, “Messing with Fire” and “Are We There Yet,” so tell us about the progression of your sound. What was the movement, in terms of production, from past singles to this one?

Anton: Me and Dylan just send stuff back and forth via email. Through the pandemic, it was hard to be in the same room. That song [“Things I Hate”] kind of came about with Luke in a studio session… and Dylan had the idea. Dylan, you had the original demo on your laptop...

Dylan: Yeah. I mean, our sound, the reason why you would assume there’s progression would be because we would probably never make a song that sounds the same. Motel 7 has always been no boundaries. One day we’ll come out with a rap song, the next day we’ll come out with a rock song, the next day it’s this and that. There’s no, “this is what we are.” It’s just… “This is a Motel 7 record.” We always thought about it like that, not pop, indie, rock, rap. 

Anton: I know for a fact we go into every single session being inspired by what we’re listening to in the past week or two, not like, “Oh, we’re going to have to stick to this genre because this is what’s working.” We’re open to new ideas and creatively inspired to challenge ourselves.

When you’re making music, what is the one thing you come back to as the most important? A motto or mantra that you stick to when you’re creating?

Dylan:  Our first project ever is called, A Reminder Not To Think Too Much. So we wrote all those songs super carelessly. None of those songs, if you listen to them one by one, really make sense. But when you put them all together with a title like that, it just puts it together. Like, wow. Those two years were a time period where we sat there, wrote music, did not care what it sounded like, if it was good, if it was bad. We just put it out. They all ended up working, people loved them, everyone connected with them. We just wanted to put a stamp on it so we called it, A Reminder Not To Think Too Much, because whenever we write music it’s just like, let’s write the song today or it’s not a song. It has to just come naturally. So, I assume that is the motto, A Reminder Not To Think Too Much. It’s what we always look back to.

Anton: Yeah, also, our lyrics are so honest and maybe, sometimes, being super honest could confuse us as being too cheesy or too on the nose… and going back to not thinking too much. That always plays again in our heads. Trust your gut and move on with it. Not like, spending three hours on one verse line or something. We’ve always been so good at embracing the imperfections of our writing and our production, because that kind of gives it its character.

If you could assume the music and the career of any artist, past or present, who would it be and why?

Anton: So many… one artist? Wow...

Dylan: Probably Jack Antonoff. He’s just so creative… like how do you even, I don't know. You just watch him and then you watch him talk, and I just want to write music with that mindset. It’s just crazy, so probably him. He’s so versatile, he’s writing the Lorde record, the Lana Del Ray record, and then he’s writing Pharrell… I don’t even know. He’s doing everything. Like how do you write a Bleachers record and then you write… it’s just so insane. He’s just a genius.

Anton: Producers like Pharrell, like, starting from the good ol’ days of Justin Timberlake. I feel like those types of records, you hear like right now and sound way better than anything else on the radio, Spotify, Top 10, Top 40, whatever. Timeless music like that is so special, and if someone, like a producer now or from years ago, was able to pull that off, that’s one of the greatest things ever. You rarely hear a song that’s timeless these days. I think Pharrell has been one of those guys that has had that under his belt from the get-go. 

Dylan: And probably Paul McCartney, because he’s just a legend.

Anton: There’s so many legends, you know. Like, let’s go down the list!

“Things I Hate” has this edgy, electronic, pop sound. Tell me the story of the song, what does it have to say?

Anton:  It was an ode to going out and those nights were you party and make bad decisions and regret it the next day… or see your friends do stupid shit and I’m pretty sure everyone has been there, right? Like, you’re on a night out in town and your buddies doing drugs or drinking way too much and passing out on the floor. And in your head, you’re like, “Fuck, what am I getting myself into? What am I doing?” I guess you get anxiety sometimes in situations like that or get in your head. It’s LA and nightlife and partying and the idea of going out as the young adult. 

Dylan: Yeah, just like falling back into people and places and things that I hate. Like that line…

Anton: Yeah, you just keep on going back to it.

Dylan: You’ll hang out with the people you don’t really like, always go back to the places you don’t really like. Even if you don’t like them, you’re still going to end up going. It’s the way our brains are programmed nowadays. I hate the club, but yeah, every once in a while I’ll go, I see people I don’t like but I’ll still say hi to them. I mean, you’re programmed to be a yes man.

Anton: It’s the same thing when you’re drunk and then you’re hungover the next day and you say, “I’m never drinking again.” And then the next day, you do it all over.

What would be the ideal spot to listen to “Things I Hate?”

Anton: It kind of feels like a nighttime song, the song you would blast in the Uber on the way to the club. I’m not sure if I see it as a sunset drive on the coast kind of song, but, I could also see it as a song you play in bed, just on your headphones casually, too.

Dylan: Or listen to it on the way home from a party, while you’re like, “fuck…” When you’re in those feels, like, “Damn, I shouldn’t have been there tonight.” Then, turn it on. When you want some reassurance of your thought process after a party, turn it on.

What would be three words you would use to describe Motel 7?

Anton: I just want people to feel like that rawness, like how we felt making the music. I want people to feel that... when we play it live. That’s probably the first thing. Second, I want the brand to feel authentic and unique.

Dylan: Raw, authentic…

Anton: That’s second, and then third… hmm. I always want to feel challenged with what we’re making, not staying in one place. I always want to keep things moving and step out of our comfort zone and challenge ourselves to be better and to grow and learn… and also to make mistakes.

Dylan: I would also say Motel 7, we want it to be very unique, raw, and authentic. Those three words probably put Motel 7 in its best category. When we’re working on music, we try to keep it as raw as possible. We don’t spend so much time on the tiny, tiny details, but at the same time, we want it to be how we made it in that moment, and that’s it. It’s just, how it is in that moment, is just how I assume everything should sound. I don’t spend too much time on the finer details, Anton’s definitely the guy who loves the little, tiny details but like from my side of things, I love to just…

Anton: You love to just get the idea down, vibe with it, and then I carry it through the details of like song stuff and other little things that no one will ever notice.

Is there anything else you would like to say, as Motel 7, either pertaining to music or something you just want to get out into the world?

Anton: I just feel like we’re always going to be creating. Like Dylan said, Motel 7 is a creative outlet.

Dylan: Pretty much, Motel 7 is an endless and endless hole. We’ll just keep falling until the time comes. I just feel like when we’re creating music, as Anton said, it’s like the next song is always better, the next song is always better. It just feels like we’re forever growing and I feel like Motel 7 isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, so people should just keep an eye out. There you go. Ones to watch, baby!

Merlin Short - The Youtuber AU

Alright, to start with, Gwaine [Username: AngrIrishman] mostly does prank videos; his is primarily a comedy channel. It starts off as in the moment pranks (probably while he is uni). As he gains more followers and grows more confident he starts doing a few sketches, usually the same characters in different scenarios (the series “drunk Irishman confused by British things is the number one favourite.) After a semester or two he drops out of uni, deciding it isn’t for him and he was only following family pressure, and he wants to do follow this youtube idea. He mostly pranks friends and family, all harmless stuff. After he meets Merlin he does a good deal of his pranks on him, but Elyan and Percival show up the mst as his victims (or partners in crime) since he’s lived with them both. He’s always willing to help out his friends with their videos, and often appears in Percival’s gaming competitions. Occasionally, for when Gwaine wants to address something serious or do a straight video of something bothering him, he has a series of “what’s aleing me today” where he talks about the serious stuff under the guise of drinking. His is one of the bigger youtube stars and his fame only skyrockets after he meets the others.  Percival [AllTankedUp] started in youtube as just responding to some of the more ridiculous challenges (planking, cinnamon challenge, parkour, etc) but ended up accidentally setting a ton of records. He started getting a lot of followers suggesting more challenges for him to do. After a year or two he began  

uploading video game run throughs after he purchased a video game and streamed playing it, not expecting anything big to come of it. The first video ending up trending for a few hours and requests came pouring in. However his biggest project, and the one he is most proud of and best known for, comes along in year three, after he met Elyan. They began recreating live action versions of video games, giant board games, etc. The internet fucking loses it over these videos. Most of them are endearingly low budget - the first is a live action super mario, where they had set up mushrooms and platforms in the park and a plushie princess peach is the prize. Elyan did MATH for this, guys.  Percival has to do exactly what Elyan tells him to do when Elyan holds the “controller” and vice versa. The video is ten minutes long and mostly consists of them falling over. Percy barely wins in the end, but he holds the plushie up all proud, looking adorable. By the next day they have over a hundred subscribers asking for more. Some of the live actions are HUGE events, brining in all of Percy’s friends and acquaintances and even family members but that’s usually only once a year. Typically, it’s no more than Percy, Elyan, and Gwaine or Leon or Merlin. Elyan helps out a lot with most of the recreations, but Percival came up with the idea and is the driving force behind it. He also has a side channel for workout videos after 2 1/2 years of requests, where he posts irregular updates. Elyan [Elyuminati] gets pulled into youtube by Gwen, and starts out as the occasional guest star in her vlogs, before submitting the odd vlog video himself, usually just him ranting about whatever in his life is annoying him at the time. It was meant to just be a way to let off steam, he didn’t expect anyone to watch them, but Elyan has a certain kind of odd charm and humor that attracts a humble but loyal following. During his gap year he travels around Europe and posts a lot of video diaries as a way of keeping in touch with Gwen, and it steadily improves over time. He starts doing “day in the life of” or “creepy ghost tour” or just sharing crazy stories about his travels. Elyan’s not a bad artist, so he’ll sometimes recreate brief sketches of the crazy stuff that happened to him while narrating what is going on. After his gap year (which almost turned into two) he returned to the UK and ended up rooming with Percy, who he knew from youtube, and started getting a degree in maths. His channel with Percy to do live action games took off, and he ended up being offered a job at a radio station after a year or so. The radio felt he had a personality that worked over radio just as well as camera. His radio show has a little bit of everything in it: acting as a voice of the millennial people, sharing whatever crazy thing happened to him that week, traveling and reviewing places and (his latest obsessions) weird news stories and conspiracies. (Leon and Gwaine could be blamed for the last one.) He doesn’t post as much except for the game videos or guest starring in others, since’s he’s busy with his radio show, but he will occasionally do a vlog session now and again, usually on his theories on conspiracies, game of thrones, and why the cosmos hates him enough to stick him with Gwaine. Leon [GiantRedGnomes], unlike Percy and Elyan, actually means to start a youtube channel. He starts off with gaming videos, including a dramatic series of the SIMS that everyone gets a little too invested in. However Leon is very conscious of the good that youtube can do, and so he also starts doing more educational style videos with fun animation. His main topics are history (but the fun kind, he focuses a lot on the weird parts of European history that no one ever talks about) space and alien life, etc. He also reviews a lot of popular tv shows and movies and shares his thoughts, opinions, and predictions for them as well as how the nerdier stuff checks out. Being the gentleman that he is, he typically tries to post both spoiler and non spoiler versions. He and Merlin start a Dnd series where they do short campaigns with different members of their friend group and other willing youtube stars. Lancelot [Lancephew], like Leon, does youtube “for the greater good.” He started youtube in high school as a project to bring “truly great people” into the spotlight by interviewing the people in his town about amazing things they had done in their lives, and he still tries to post videos like that whenever he can. Half of his videos are him taking news stories, politics, economic theories, etc and explaining it in layman’s terms for the average viewer. He shares his own opinions in the video as well. During college Lancelot started adding a musical element to his interview stories, writing his own songs to bring into the background. This branched out into him writing instrumental music, which he often shares on youtube and itunes. Lancelot is currently doing a YouTube Red project in aide of a charity that is about small town civilians having to deal with a zombie dystopia in a realistic manner - asking questions such as “do we still have to pay for data?” “Can someone take my braces off.”) Also, he’s dating Gwen and they do really cute “ask us questions” and dating game videos that the internet loves. There are also several videos of his dog doing crazy things he manages to catch on film. Gwen [GwenSmash] is mostly a youtube vlogger, and she shares a little bit of everything. Her day to day life, sped up streams of the cosplay outfits she makes the group, sims and gaming videos, ask/advice videos, review videos, and stories in a series called “Growing up Gwen” where she shares moments of her childhood/teenage years having to deal with being the only girl in a household of guys, such as buying a bra, trying to find a video game character that is a female without exposed breasts, etc. After she gets to know all the guys better, she will share moments of being one of the few girls among many guys, and has no shame in calling them out. Half of her twitter is photos of the guys holding up a sign saying “I said/made *insert sexist remark here*.” She doesn’t really try to limit herself to one brand and just does all kinds of videos. She and Morgana are often work together/guest star in each other’s videos as flatmates and best friends.   Morgana [ExplodingSparkles] got into youtube during college at Gwen’s encouragement. She liked to create her own music mashups and Gwen starting encouraging her to share them on youtube. Nowadays, she and Lance will team up occasionally to do music together, and she has written a few of her own songs, all released on youtube/itunes. A LOT of her video vlogs are feminist, LGBTQA, and wealth inequality rants, typically following her having to talk to Uther. She as a popular series called “Ask Morgana” where she answers questions her subscribers ask her. The beginning/middle of her channel (when it was getting big) has a lot of anger and rant videos about everything wrong with the world. Morgana eventually grew out of her angry stage, and began discussing the issues from a healthier pov, such as how you can be an ally, etc. She also started doing a lot more comedy sketches, all written and directed by herself. Some of them just have her in it as multiple people, others have her and Gwen or other guest stars. Some of them are just sketches about funny moments in her life, but most are original content, such as “Smart Shakespeare in Five Minutes” where she acts out a sketch of Shakespeare’s plays where everything goes very differently, usually based on one character making a smarter decision. Arthur [KingCamelot] started doing youtube in his final year of boarding school, and for the first year or so he and Morgana both tried to hide the fact that they were doing youtube from each other, until one day Morgana stumbled across his channel after it was recommended after one of Gwen’s videos. This was over summer break and the result was her barging in during one of his vlogs, and the entire (loud and hilarious) conversation was caught on film. Arthur later uploaded it to youtube, and neither will admit it is one of their favourite videos. Arthur kept it in a vlog style during uni, sharing his thoughts on current events, challenge videos, his favourite books and tv shows, his daily life and his struggle with uni/the business degree his father wanted him to get. He ended up switching to film editing sophomore year after Morgana, Leon and other youtuber friends supported his ideas. While it made things rockier with his father, Arthur was much happier. Videos became much more frequently after that, and Arthur began to guest star in his friends videos as well. Arthur became a big name on youtube almost instantly, largely because of his good lucks and his notoriety as the son of a famous parliament member, but remained a big name through his own merit. About midway through his time at uni Arthur began to post videos about insightful topics about things that suggested he was starting to see the world a bit differently. After he graduated about 4 years ago, it started to turn into full blown advocacy and outreach videos raising awareness for social change. Of course, Arthur didn’t get to that point by himself. Enter Merlin, stage right. Merlin [MerlinTrixx] started youtube HIS final year of public schooling, about two years after Arthur. He started with just short simple vlogs and magic tricks that even professional magicians couldn’t figure out. He followed Gwen and Morgana and saw Arthur a few times in their videos or recommended suggestions. After picking up on Arthur’s rather one sided view of how wealth and poverty work he called him out on it in a private message. Arthur did NOT take it well. There began a video war where both boys passive aggressively mentioned the other. Before it got to far, however, they accidentally ended up meeting at a youtube convention. (Arthur was there to speak on a panel, Merlin went to learn editing tips). The recognized each other and ended up talking for the remaining two days of the convention and became fast friends. Gwen, who had known Merlin through uni for about a year now, had had no idea that Arthur and Merlin had been complaining to her for the past few months about each other and was ready to knock sense into both of them when she found out. After becoming friends, Arthur and Merlin began showing up in each other’s videos more. Merlin, who hated his roommates, began hanging around more at Arthur and Leon’s flat (they went to a different uni in the same city, but had moved off campus) instead of Gwen’s as much. By the end of sophomore year, Merlin had gained a decent number of followers and his channel consisted of vlogs, his magic tricks, him and Arthur hanging out and being weird, and sharing his vast and unparalled knowledge of all things fantasy and nerdy. He, Leon and Gwen get into the longest discussions when they do reviews together. Merlin takes some time off of school, still unsure what he wants to do beside youtube, and moves in with Arthur to split the rent. The videos continue in earnest, and views/followers for both boys continue to grow as they feed off of one another, make more compilation videos, and add more content. After a couple of years, more than half their followers are wondering if they are more than just flatmates, but they are keeping quiet on the matter. The both still have their own channel, which they update frequently, but they also have a shared channel where they do reviews of shows they both like, ask/challenge requests, gaming videos, a few prank videos - they got into a prank way with Percy, Elyan and Gwaine once. Morgana and Gwen somehow won. They also do a deep discussion on Arthurian legend and other mythos, in comedic style. They are known as the “Avalon Nine” - a nickname given to them by the internet after they learned they all knew each other and they frequently appear in each others videos now that they all live in the same city. Morgana and Gwen had met in boarding school, and are currently living together after Morgana moved back after Uni until Lancelot finally asks Gwen to marry him, which Morgana suspects will happen soon. Gwen met Merlin at their uni, the same city that Arthur and Leon were going to uni in. Arthur already knew Gwen through Morgana and they had hung out fairly often, which only increased after they both befriended Merlin. Merlin and Gwen both met Lancelot separately at youtube conventions, and thought it hilarious the day they found out they both knew him. Lancelot moved to the city after graduating uni. Elyan met everyone through Gwen and Morgana met everyone through Gwen and Arthur. Gwaine met Merlin at a convention and later Merlin recognized him auditing his film class for “free editing tips/ideas.” They became fast friends and Gwaine spent a few nights in Merlin’s dorm when his water or heat wouldn’t work. He moves in with Elyan when he comes back from his gap years. Lancelot and Percival, who knew each other prior to the rest of the group, lived with each other for a while before the landlord sold the building. Lance moved to a single while Percival moved in with Elyan and Gwaine. There have been a series of “who knows you better” challanges and games throughout the group, including ones based off of dating games, best friend games, and family games. Merlin and Arthur have won them ALL. Even against Lancelot and Gwen that one time. Leon shared in one of his videos that Arthur and Merlin are also banned from teaming up in charades, pictonary and catch phrase in the gaming videos because they are undefeatable and possible psychic.  Bonus:  Mordred is obviously much younger than the others (just now starting Uni while the others are in their mid to late twenties). So he grew up watching a lot of their earlier stuff and he just idolizes them. He somehow managed to befriend them through social media/convenstions and is a bit surprised he is actually on first name basis with these amazing, talented (giant dorks). He appears in their videos sometimes but is hesitant  to upload anything on his own channel for a long time, since it is harder to get started on youtube now than it was for his older friends. After some encouragement he uploads a few, and the whole  group advertises him since they all kind of adore him, he’s like a little brother. Unlike the others though, Mordred doesn’t vlog or do video games or reviews or anything. Oh no. His videos are all freestyle rapping/spoken word poetry. About whatever catches his fancy. The weirdest thing is they’re GOOD. Its at such odds with his personality but it is what it is. Gwaine has started a betting pool on when Mordred reaches 1,000 subscribers.  Cenred is a little asshole who does mean/staged prank videos and blogs full of sexist and racist remarks on youtube. The group hates him, half of youtube boy cots him and he has had several scandals.  Elena is a youtube they all know and are friendly with, but because she lives in Scotland they aren’t as close. She does a lot of gaming videos, embarrassing stories from her life, and videos about her horse.  Morgause is a powerful admin/part owner of youtube and constantly makes decisions that hurt most independent and creative youtubers. At one point she tried to flag coming out videos or videos with content/opinions she didn’t agree with. She also pressures them to do advertising and tampers with the recommended and trending list. The group pushes back against these regulations, and it turns into an all out war, where Gwaine, Merlin and Arthur are all nearly banned from youtube before Morguase is fired. 

Also I actually do really like that Silver got an androgenous design without having a “reason”. Like uuhh, what i mean is the idea of him being cutesy and ‘feminine’ just cos his fashion sense is androgenous, and such. Anime tends to go all-in with the gender essentialism and be like ‘must have stereotypically gendered personality of the opposite gender’ instead of even just.. person looks like neither.. might have stereotypes of neither. And i mean in real life there are plenty of LGBT or gender non-conforming people who might be a dude with long hair who’s a tough sports fan, or a short haired girl who likes feminine hobbies or whatever. or just no correlation whatsoever between how you like to dress and what gender stereotypes you do or don’t have. Man when I was a kid I always felt weirdly pressured to enjoy sports and stop finding pet bunnies cute or else lose my ‘tomboy card’. aka the closest thing 90s era kids ahd to a conception of what being transgender is, lol. (man i wonder if i could have missed so many years of self hate if i grew up on today’s cartoons that have more canoncical non-negatively portrayed LGBT characters...)

Oh and also randomly a chance to mention how much i love Crona from Soul Eater, again! A canonical non-binary hero who’s 100% just portrayed as a normal person who exists and is nonbianyr. No overblown weird obsession with ‘uwu how sexay its a boy in a dress’ or ‘omg how weird we cant tell what gender it is’ or ‘omg stereotypical flambouyant scary gay tropes applied to a trans person who isnt really actually nonbinary but just comes off that way because this author somehow thinks that being gay and being trans are the same thing, and also that trans women are something less than full women’. And seriously Crona doesn’t have any steroetypical personality of either gender, and is a REALLY REFRESHING case of a socially anxious character being portrayed without either kind of weird gendered stereotype anime seems to have. Like the ‘uwu sexy helpless child’ if it’s a female characetr, or the ‘gross creepy nerd’ or ‘is allowed to perv on everyone because ha ha he doesnt realise he’s doing anything wrong’ version for male characters. Nah just.. shy person. Exists. Actual realism. Nothing else. kinda wish we could give more of this to the cis characters too, yknow? like seriously even nowadays we only tend to see ‘subversion! this anxious woman is actually gross and otaku instead of sexy!’ or whatever. just flipping the script instead of thinking ‘hey maybe we could write this personality like a personality instead of a pile of prewritten lines that nobody actually says in real life?’ ALSO ALSO!! I really like how Crona’s plot actually goes out of its way to subvert the idea of ‘must have a reason to be gender non-conforming’. Like there’s soooo much ‘this girl was forced to act like a boy because contrived circumstance and is really cis’ or ‘this character is just super depraved and thats why they act queer’ or ‘this character isnt human and their species is all nonbinary and thats the only reason they’re nonbinary’ or ‘this character got in a magic space rays accident that gave him a female body even though he was born cis, and him still identifying as male is thus kinda the opposite of what being trans is, yet we simulteanously use it as a chance to Talk About Why Trans Is Scary’. like the big sad twist of Crona’s plot is that they ARENT some magical created homunculus which would be an ‘excuse’ for being genderless. Its supposed to be a huge ‘holy fuck let me hug you’ moment when you find out they were actually the villain’s actual child that she experimented on as a toddler to turn them into a weapon. And like they also give a resounding no to the ‘crona identifies as genderless because they are two people in one body' thing because ragnorok is male. The actual creepy homunculus demon blood thing is the one who’s cis! Reminds me of how pissed off i get whenever people throw around the false fact that “Qus are a genderles species” in final fantasy 9. No, Quina is the only one who gets neutral pronouns, and the other two we meet of this magical fantasy species are both male. Quina is queer within the game’s world as well as ours! Also incidentally for some reason Quale was changed to female in certain european countries? I wonder why that even happened because he’s male in japanese too. Like thats an actual decision someone made, not a mistake. Maybe someone out there in the dubbing team crossed paths with my Really Weird Evidenceless Headcanon That Quan is Quale’s Ex Boyfriend and decided to pull a crusadermon censorship on him. Also that was funny because Crusadermon was a male-only species for ages in japanese, and female-only in english, so then when the japanese continuity introduced a female Crusadermon in one of the videogames it would give her an entirely different impression in the dub. Like the twist of her identity was way less surprising because we never had this perception of this species of magical robot monster as being male only. Though it was still a pleasant surprise in both versions to see a female alphamon! or transgender themes with a character who switched identity from male to female upon becoming human? it wasn’t super clear but either way she’s awesome!

OKAY IVE GONE ON EIGHTY TANGEANTS OKAY BYE

whatever in summary this is my reasons for still giving redesign-silver an androgenous fashion sense whenever he’s in different outfits, even though his hairstyle got shortified. You Have Implied The Potential LGBT Relateability, You Can No Longer Remove It. Also him and gold is a really cute ship in the manga, so i can’t not see him as gay/bi/pan. Every Route Leads To LGBT For This Man, Sorry You Cannot Stop It. ALSO crona and quina are great characters also, even if they have nothing in common with silver so this post is a big ol ramble of nothing i guess New Pokemon News just made me really hyper!

On Point With: Frankie Sharp

One of NYC’s few truly great and original nightlife event producers, this giant got his start at a small dive bar in San Francisco before making it big here with the notorious Westgay at Westway. He’s still giving us massive weekly kikis featuring the best of the scene and way beyond, but lately he’s been offering some more intimate vehicles as well. Thotyssey rides the cutting edge with Frankie Sharp!

Thotyssey: Hello there Frankie, thanks for finding a minute out of your super busy schedule to chat with us! How are you doing?

Frankie Sharp: I’m great! Super high from last night's MARY, my weekly cabaret at Club Cumming. It was a great show. But today, back at the grind. How are you?

I'm hanging in there, and riding these weird weather fluctuations! You're a San Francisco native... I think that city has the best weather.

SF has the best weather probably one month of out the year, September, which is their late summer. It’s perfectly sunny and warm, and not too hot. Otherwise, surprisingly pretty grey and nippy. But when its good it’s good. I respond better to the drama of the seasons. I need constant change around me. My blood pressure responds well to that, I think.

That probably translates well to your work as a nightlife event producer, where if you can't consistently change and innovate, then there's no point in being there.

I certainly can’t stand still or in one place for very long. That also probably has to do with me being a military brat, living in a new city every year. Every grade from Kindergarten to ninth grade was a new place for my family to call our temporary home. That also sharpened my skills on how to make new friends very quickly.

Were you always creative / artistic in some way when you were growing up?

Very much so. I had some friends, but usually only at school. I spent most of my time alone. I would write and draw my own comic books about gay superheroes, except I didn't know they were gay at the time. I just knew they were hot men I liked drawing, and powerful female characters whom I suppose were drag queens. I feel like I manifested those characters into my current adulthood. I’m surrounded by powerful creatures and gay superheroes all the time now.

I'm predicting a Frankie Sharp graphic novel in the future! So, I understand it was a dive bar called the Gangway in San Francisco where your nightlife career began?

Yes! I was working answering phones for an advertising / design firm. I hated having to be somewhere at 9am, and at a desk no less. So on my weekends I was eating ecstasy and running around with all the nightlife creatures, going to all these great club events listening to house music.The best house music outside of Chicago is San Francisco house. I was going to parties thrown by magnificent drag queens like Juanita More's Booty Call and Heklina's TrannyShack, fun club nights by Honey Soundsystem. SF nightlife is all performance-based and peacocky, I loved the nightlife there. 

But there was still something missing. When I first went to Gangway, I fell in love. It was a dilapidated dive bar--a half-working jukebox and carpeted walls, but 100% gay clientele over 50. I loved it. I grew up in bars, as my mother was a stripper in the Philippines and that’s how my father met her when he was a sailor stationed there. So for some reason, those kind of bars are very sentimental--almost spiritual--to me. 

So I decided to throw a party there on a shoestring budget--way before I knew what a "guarantee" was, or how to strike a deal. I just wanted to have fun, and be able to afford a pizza slice. I DJ'd from iTunes, and filled the room with 99 cent balloons. It was the best time.

OMG after that graphic novel you need to write a full-on book! 

What motivated you to come out and mix it up in NYC?

I was very into reading PAPER Magazine, The Face and i-D, and NYC was so fully represented in those mags. And then I became obsessed with all things New York. It was during Electroclash era. There were great bands like W.I.T., Fischerspooner, Scissor Sisters, the goddesses AVENUE D (”Do I Look Like A Slut?”) and wonderful performance artists like Sophia Lamar and Amanda Lepore. I I had them all cut out and taped to my wall like some kind of teeny bopper fan. They were all queer, bold, interesting and unapologetic about their message of both fun and consciousness. Talk about manifestation: all those people I mentioned who I was full-tilt-boogie fans of are now all very close friends of mine. 

Not to mention when I first saw Wigstock when I was 16. I knew New York was going to be my home eventually.

I was able to afford my pizza slice and I was having fun outside of work, but then it hit a wall. There’s only so much you can do in San Francisco; albeit a wonderful city, it’s a small town, too. I needed more room to grow. So a one-way ticket to NYC was booked, and I never looked back. I moved Sept 11, 2009. I remember ‘cause the ticket was super cheap to fly on that date.

Eventually you start meeting these people here, and making things happen with the Frankie Sharp brand. MySpace and Facebook were definitely around then, but I'm not sure how much they were being used to market nightlife... is that how you were doing it?

Sorta. Myspace was somewhat used for promoting, but I was still printing out paper flyers then. Passing them out everywhere, legit putting them on cars, etc. I kinda miss that old school aspect. Nowadays, being able to monitor the response gives me a lil’ anxiety. But I have anxiety over everything. I just wanna do a good job and make everyone happy.

I miss those days too! And yeah, having access to all that promotional data can  be information overload. 

The party that most people will always associate you with from your earlier NYC career is WestGay at the Westway! It was such an interesting location for a kiki because it was kind of isolated in its neighborhood, but that just added to the appeal. 

Yeah, exactly. Once you were there you were stuck.

What else was it about WestGay that resonated with people so much, do you think?

We had very, very, very few rules. I mean, dicks and titties were out, celebrities getting laid by gogo boys, the influx of Drag Race was just happening which we heavily included in our programming. Not to mention I had even more NYC idols who became friends perform: Lil Kim, Azealia Banks, Eve, Foxy Brown, Mel B from Spice Girls, Hercules Love Affair... I even had C&C Music Factory perform. They were the first actual CD I owned. 

I mean, it was just everything! And at the time, there was nothing like it. All the other parties were sorta people in black, all kinda looking at each other. Honestly, it was some guilt-free, shameless fun that you didn't have to feel bad about. It was chic, in that it was totally not at all. It was completely hedonistic. Over indulging was the theme.

In the event production world,  rules suck. Is that like one of the hardest aspects of planning a memorable event where guests can feel like they can really let loose... dealing with restrictions from the management, and the limitations of the venue?

Yeah it was one of the reasons Public Arts sucked so hard. A great venue to look at and on paper. But horrible behind the scenes.

You’re talking about a party you were heading this past summer for a brief but memorable run, Something Special. Who or what wasn’t working for you there?

A lot of venues want gay dollars, but they don’t want gay people. And it wasn’t Matt and Carlos (who also owned Westway), they were great. It was their partner, The Public Hotel. They were corporate assholes, and made life very difficult for me. The didn’t respect what we were doing, and took months to pay. They could’ve really ruined my reputation, because it took forever for me to pay my staff sometimes. And these are hard-working artists. 

But oddly, it was still a successful night and very well-attended. And it served me in other ways. At least it got the attention of the Moxy Hotel, who is a part of the Tao Group and the home for my new Sunday night MAGIC. They are incredibly supportive, saw what were up to and signed off on our buffoonery (because our buffoonery is also lucrative).

But it was very stressful [at the Public Hotel]. Not sure why anyone would continue doing things there, especially gay folks.

Ironically, you got a GLAM nomination this past year for Something Special, and the GLAMs were held in the Public Hotel!

I introduced [GLAMs producer] Cherry Jubilee to that space at the tail end of my time with Public. I was trying to do them a favor. The GLAMs had some very familiar technical fuck-ups throughout the night that were the venue’s fault. It actually gave me PTSD. But the GLAMs themselves were just that... GLAM!

I love what Cherry Jubilee does, what a great producer. I just hope one year it becomes more inclusive to all aspects and pockets of the city and surrounding boroughs. Because right now, it really is just a popularity contest for clubs above 14th street. Westgay won best party every year for four years. For that I am so grateful. But it seems things have changed. 

But maybe its not the awards--perhaps its the parties that have become more segregated. At least in the small time MAGIC has been running, it feels like a good bridge between uptown and downtown, Manhattan, Brooklyn and Queens. 

What are the seeds that need to be planted for an event to be Frankie Sharp-level great? And then, how do you know when it’s time to switch things up with something that’s already going strong?

In the beginning stages, I have a tight group of people I work with, and have for years since Westgay: DJs, performers, hosts and sub-promoters. Then with each new event, I hire a second string, usually of younger up-and-comers. 

But before everything else, it’s location location location... venue venue venue. Does the room have heart? Can you do Runway? Can you zigzag and find something new all night? Will Amanda Lepore look good in this lighting? Does the sound hit the bottom of my spine? There are many questions that need to be addressed. But it’s always an ongoing transformation. I’m never, ever satisfied. I’m always tuning something.

Always seeking that elusive perfection! Speaking earlier of Brooklyn, your Saturday party Metrosensual at Metropolitan Bar has been running strong for a while now, with top notch guest performers ever week. Metrosensual has definitely helped put Brooklyn nightlife on the map, as far as star power and general epicness. 

I LOOOVE METROPOLITAN. Those boys there who run the show are probably the most professional, supportive and friendliest out of every venue I’ve ever worked with. I always tell Steven Mac, who is the GM there, if I ever open my own club, he’s going to run it.

Do you have a favorite Metrosensual moment from parties past?

Bringing Brooke Candy and a her full band--people lost their minds. I loved bringing Latrice Royale there, because the crowd is just drunk and wanting to have a good time, and extend love to the performers and the performers only want to give the same in return. Valentina, of course, was a big night. What a pro, and in person looks not real-- like an Almodovar goddess. Frankly, every week rules. Its pretension-free, which is so refreshing and important to me. I think of Metrosensual as my Marc by Marc version of my bigger nightclubs. It’s really my favorite.

Dragula’s Biqtch Puddin will be there this Saturday! 

Her manager reached out to me about having her perform, and when I mentioned it to some kids they were like PLEASE have her. I think people are super excited to see her. I know I am.

MARY at Club Cumming is a weekly cabaret variety show that you produce, and it's a much more low key but still eclectic affair, in a very intimate setting. Ragamuffin and Tyler Ashley are among the performers who appear each week, and you frequently sing on the stage yourself as well! What prompted you to create this very different sort of production?

Our administration, and my sobriety. When Club Cumming was Eastermbloc, I was doing Friday nights there... a party called Dumb Club. It was house, hip hop, party jams, a short drag show, gogo boys, debauchery, classic East Village. When it was bought by Daniel Nardicio and Alan Cumming, they approached me about doing something there still. 

But I needed to give something more soulful, something more fulfilling and intimate. I needed to engage with the people who have been coming to my clubs. So I thought this was the perfect opportunity to do just that--while being radically queer, irreverent, political and warm, inviting, inspiring and honest. It’s all the club hosts, gogo boys and DJ’s I have at my club nights, who have all of these additional talents that have been laying dormant finally get to see the light of day.

There were enough unhinged, boozy, headless dance nights. I wanted to build an environment full or art and love. Music and Song. It’s been life-changing thus far. And my new sobriety needed a new project. I couldn’t have asked for a better sponsor.

Congratulations on your sobriety. There's a growing number of sober people in nightlife who keep at it, but it never ceases to amaze me with all the world’s vices at arm’s reach. Is it still a daily struggle? It was never a struggle. I’m not one who wakes up in the morning and wants booze or drugs, or is like "what a stressful day, I need a drink.” I would drink heavily at work because work was in bars and clubs, and I would work 3-4 nights a week and then I would recover from that 2-3 nights a week. That’s your whole week.

And I wouldn't be able to grasp reality. It really screwed with my emotional and mental state. I was unable to be productive, and that’s what I am: a producer. What is a producer who can’t produce? When I was doing WestGay, I was in a blackout pretty much for four years... and it was very successful. That was me at a C- grade level. I wanna see what I can do at a conscious, strong A+.

Being sober has changed my life rapidly, and I keep becoming brighter, lighter, stronger. And I feel love more than I ever have. I describe it often as getting as close to the divine as I’ve ever felt. Close to God. I know that’s heavy. But I feel very connected to the universe and our planet these days. The high that drugs and whiskey used to give me I get from hard work, building communities and hitting a high note at MARY. Cheesy, but true.

What an amazing place to be at! That brings us to MAGIC at Magic Hour, which I guess is only a month or two running now and already a tremendous success. Did everything just kinda “magically” fall into place here?

Honestly, yes. They called me. I called up my business partner in crime, Birdy Black, and we did a walk-through. When we realized the topiary of the bushes were teddy bears fucking, I knew this was our new home.

One thing I realize is, I’m huge on energy. Every event I’ve ever done is an exact representation of where I am in my life. WestGay was LOUD, ruthless and intoxicating because I was loud, ruthless and intoxicated. Something Special was just that: special and confused and erratic, because circumstances were just that. MAGIC is everything I’ve learned and manifested and called upon for everyone else. It has nothing to do with me. It’s not about my ego or money; it’s about giving a gift to New York City, the love of my life. It’s truth, acceptance, art and cuckoory harnessed.

There's always a great cast of hosts and performers there, and you've really done wonders bringing actual huge stars to appear or perform there. Damn, Charlie XCX is gonna be there this Sunday, that's amazing! How is this even happening?

I saw she was in town performing, and her show sold out in 60 seconds, or something absurd. I saw everyone on social media freaking out about not snagging tickets. So in my usual fashion, I wanted to find a way to give something to the kids and create something special for everyone. I reached out to a mutual friend and asked if she had an afterparty planned. She did not... so I made some phone calls.

She’ll be performing with a huge roster of other stars we’re not announcing just yet. But it’s going to be insane. It’s taking everything for me not to mention who they are! but everyone is going to gag with everyone on board. Which then inspired me to do a big performer once a month, moving forward. We have lots planned!

Lindsay Lohan hosted a Brian Rafferty party this past MLK Weekend.

I love Brian Rafferty. We were just texting the other day because he found some old tally list from his Griffin party, which I hosted once. I brought 25 people! It was my first NYC hosting gig. Hes a good egg.

Is queer nightlife now officially a vessel for major artists and celebrities to reach out directly to their fans?

I can’t speak on that. But personally, I’ve always tried to have bigger names perform or DJ at my events. It’s New York! I love the idea of having Andy Cohen DJing my small bar parties, or Azealia Banks at her career height performing the closing of WestGay so people can be really close to them. I love the surrealism of that.  I think, like me, those celebrities just wanna give something back.  

And everyone wants to be a part of New York Nightlife. It’s Legend.

Do you have anything else in the works, as far as events or other projects?

Jazz singer and musician David Raleigh and I are starting a monthly, social media free eleganza of a dinner party called IRL (In Real Life). I’ve been planning it for a couple of years now, but life kept happening. I have a gorgeous space in the East Village for it now. People will check their phones at the door, a small orchestra provides the evenings soundtrack plays, Stacy Layne Matthews will cater it for the first one, and we all just actually get to exchange with one another. All this exciting bumper cars we do in the club is wonderful, but I wanna know more about the people around me. We can still have club looks and glamour, but Its a classic dinner party where people TALK. 

Every month starting in August, we will always have a spotlight on a superstar chef, a bold-named performer from everything from Broadway, opera to hip hop, and a speaker doing an inspirational "TedTalk.” We already have very recognizable names scheduled to perform, and inspirational speakers we just love to hear preach their path of success: authors, filmmakers, writers, politicos... etc. 

So classy! That should certainly break some ground as far a nightlife experience goes.

Also, I’ve been working on a scripted TV show for what seems like years now. It’s gone through so many incarnations and different producers and networks interested, but we have a new avenue for it now, and that’s exciting. And pretty soon, my full attention might have to go there. We’ll see!

Right now, everything I’ve ever wanted is happening. And I know that sounds like I’m gloating, but I wanted to honor my sobriety once again--and not in a preachy way, but in a conscious way. With a clear head, strong muscles and sharpened tools, anything you want... you can just take. It’s a magnificent discovery to uncover.

A true inspiration! Okay, to wrap it up: what's the best piece of advice you can give to a newbie who wants to start producing nightlife events in NYC?

Stay out of my way. Just kidding! Be nice to everyone. You never know who anyone is. Plus, just be a kind human person. Life is better that way. Know your worth, but leave your ego out of it. 

Do not poach talent. 

Respect other promoters’ venues. 

And always find a balance of night with day. Vitamin D is needed, so is water and exercise. Feeling powerful from the inside out will get you far.

Thank you, Frankie!

Frankie Sharp produces MARY at Club Cumming (Tuesdays, 9pm), Metrosensual at Metropolitan Bar (Saturdays, 10pm) and MAGIC at Magic Hour Bar & Lounge (Sundays, 10pm). Check Thotyssey’s calendar for a full schedule of his events and appearances, and follow Frankie on Facebook and Instagram.

See Also: Frankie Sharp (11.30.2018)

On Point Archives

9,11,19,20,22 for the mun ask meme!

9. Tell me about your favorite group you ever joined

my favorite group that i’ve ever been in is @requiem-rpg​ which is the group i admin now. it’s a modern marauder group and i’m just a sucker for hp groups. i’ve done like disney and walking dead and modern royals but nope i always come back to hp. if i had to pick one that i didn’t you know make myself i would say wsmr. it was a disney/hp crossover rp where i met my rp friends that ive had for like nearly a decade and it was when i realllllly got into rp for the first time

11. Tell me about your favorite character you ever played

straight up i think glenda chittock is like my favorite character that i’ve ever played? just because i’ve literally never lost muse for her? i always have muse for that girl ugh she’s just so fun? and outspoken and gutsy and she’s my fave rn

19. What’s an old RP trend that you miss?

i miss back when everyone was super cool with short threads? i feel like there’s way too much pressure on paras and excess prose nowadays? which tbh i don’t really care i will continue to post one sentence long starters one day and a paragraph + the next

20. What’s an old RP trend that you DON’T miss?

stealing this from @musingsbyannabelle​ but (and im guilty of this too) back when we never used quotation marks and did like -- Hey, what’s up? *she smiled* HORRIBLE WHY DID WE DO THAT

22. Do you have any RP horror stories you’d be willing to share?

oof well the first thing that comes to mind is back when i was in that disney crossover rp i just had this character who kept getting stuck in these god awful ships and like she was with this one guy who tbh ruined robert sheehan for me for a while which is sad bc i love him and we had this ship together and irl i went on vacation with my family for a week and reasonably could not be on. i came back and the mun decided she no longer wanted to be my partner and jumped ship without telling me and discarded all our plots .then made me write a public breakup between the characters where she made it seem like it was all my fault and came off really weird idk. i later ran into that mun in a diff group but i dont think they knew it was me and i was like :)))))) there are more stories but shitty ship partners always stick out

 mun ask meme!

Heathers 2018

So when I saw @princess-has-a-pen​ post about the new Heathers remake I had to look it up for two reasons:

1. I’m a huge fan of the Movie and Musical and 2. I had to see the fucking horror show that Spike TV was no doubt going to turn it into.

Now Princess asked in their tags the exact same thing I asked myself when I saw the post:

“Why?”

Well friends, strap yourselves in cuz I’m about to take you for a fucking ride.

Why remake Heathers? A movie that has solidified itself as a cult classic for it’s gritty, fucked up story and characters that took pretty much every kid who went to high school in the 80′s (or any time really) life and amped it up to 11?

Cuz the original Heathers is full of 'problematic' things and they can now remake it to be more 'progressive' while snagging a new audiance of younglings who know about Heathers because of the musical.

Now my friends, as I stated before, I love both the movie and the Musical, but as a mature, rational fan over the age of 30, I can look at something I love and point out it’s flaws and believe me, when it comes to the source material, Heathers the Musical is stuffed full of flaws and that creates some problems.

I am pretty sure all the Tumblrinas who idolize ‘Heathers’ have only seen the musical because honestly, the ‘date’ scene where Heather McNamara gets raped in the background would be enough to make them REEEEEE all the way to the fucking bank.

Like legit, she is literally struggling under her date (and not in a fun way) to make him stop and Veronica just fucking leaves her there. We don’t see her get away or anything, so you can only assume that that whole thing didn’t end well, especially given how miserable McNamara is in the movie to begin with.

The Muscial made light of a lot of the grim parts the movie worked to highlight, specifically bullying and suicide and the dangers of giving into pressure and just  being a fucking terrible human being. Not to mention it twisted things in a way that actually reinforced some harmful tropes. Specifically with the two main characters JD and Heather.

JD in the movie is a completely sociopath who physically and mentally abuses Veronica for almost the entire thing and in the Musical they gave him the stereotypical ‘troubled boy who wanted to make the world better but it just got out of hand’ treatment. Like “Oh yeah, he murders three people and tries to blow up a school but his dad’s a jerk and his mommy committed suicide so you can’t blame him! Deep down he’s just a tortured soul who really loves Veronica!”. Spoilers! He doesn’t love Veronica, at least not in any way that should be even entertained as any sort of ‘love’. He and Veronica’s relationship coupled with his ‘sacrifice’ at the end of the play made me cringe extra hard because it felt like it was romanticizing abusive relationships and in all honesty it was. A specific scene from the Musical where I thought they were actually going to address the toxicity of their ‘relationship’ (at the end of the ‘Our Love is God’ musical number where Veronica seems to have a mental break down as she screams ‘Our Love is God’ over and over again as if to drown out the fact that she just assisted in the murder of two people), was brushed under the rug the next scene and seemingly forgotten about till something ELSE big happens and then it’s fucking Ground Hogs Day apparently.

Veronica in the movie joined the Heathers before the movie even began because she wanted to be popular and due to her skill in forgery is pretty much made their pet project. She’s not as much of a cunt as Chandler or Duke but she's still pretty fucking bad. She kills Kurt herself, blows off her actual best friend in exchange for shallow popularity, laughs over Heather Chandler dying and only turns on JD when the suicide note she writes for Heather Chandler backfires and causes people to glorify Chandler as a saint. This as well leads her to realize that it’s pointless to kill people because someone else just takes their place as “The Mythic Bitch” ala Heather Duke’s transformation (also because JD straight up slaps her in the face for trying to back out on him). She only ever does anything semi sweet at the VERY end after JD gets blown up. In the Musical she is portrayed as a sweet innocent little buttercup who is super besties with Martha and sticks up for the little guy and never meant to hurt anyone and was just dragged into everything bad by bad people. She feels constantly guilty for it and seems unable to make any actual choices herself outside of breaking into JD’s house to fuck him. She’s totally innocent guys. Totes.

And before you say “C’moooon it’s a fuckin’ Muscial!” you need to go watch you some Dear Evan Hansen or Les Miserables because those two Musicals are heavy as fuck and had no problem in showing how fucked up serious shit like war and suicide was through flawed characters.

Now with this new series coming out it seems destined to fail. It has only been releasing Instagram videos to promote the show and already it’s hitting all the same old PC points while being SO EDGY at the same time. It’s Riverdale all fucking over again.

“The terrible trio is more like a set of outcasts who have taken over Westerberg High School.” -EW article

Like really? Fuckin’ really? The Heathers were all popular girls due to their wealth (McNamara), beauty (Duke) and over all exuding of confidence and attitude backed up by all of the previously stated assets (Chandler). They weren’t a bunch of outcasts. They took pride in how they looked and how people saw them. I don’t understand this fucking need to make every kid nowadays an ‘outcast’ in an effort to make them ‘relatable’. They did it to every kid in the Power Rangers remake and MJ in Spider-Man: Homecoming and it’s starting to  get fucking annoying. Oh well, gotta get them kids with all that EDGE!

So let’s look at the ‘Heathers’ (I can’t bring myself to not put that in quotation marks when talking about these piles of hot garbage):

Heather Chandler is a plus-sized, Skrillex haired edge lord who looks like every Tumblr Feminist/Suicide Girls reject and literally gives off no aura of power or fear at all. She just comes off as some fat bitch who found the HAAS RadFem movement on Twitter and used it to fill herself with enough undeserved self importance to justify being a cunt to everyone. Yes, where the original Heather Chandler got her power and reputation through sheer intimidation and personality, this Heather Chandler looks like the type of girl who will physically assault you in the bathroom and threaten to sit on you till you die.

Gee golly, I see Heather Duke is a sassy gay male now (and a white one at that). Wow, it’s not like that hasn’t been done a billion fucking times. Funny that he’s a white dude whose character in the movie and play turns out to capitalize on Heather Chandler’s death to raise their own status to the ‘queen bitch’ of the school. That’ll do GREAT for gay stereotypes I’m sure.

Aaaaand Heather McNamara, our possibly Asian possibly Latinx butprobably just party bag of mixed race token character who is the literal punching bag of the group. At least that seems to have not changed but I am sure it’ll help add shallow sympathy since now it’s not a bunch of white kids beating up on a little white girl, it’s a bunch of white kids beating up on a little minority girl. Goodie goodie.

The rest:

JD literally gets nothing to show from his video except one speaking line where he is telling Veronica that she’s “Not like Heather Chandler” she’s “better” while quick cutting a bunch of random shots from the show that mostly seem pointless and just confusing with one flash of him apparently running the flat of a knife on his palm behind his back? So we get nothing from our poor, tortured sociopath. I can just hear the producers of this show now: “We can’t show him being too soft or the old fans might not watch it and can’t show him being a psychotic asshole or the Musical fans won’t watch it, so make it just as cluster fucking and confusing as possible so no one will ask questions and just be drawn in with all the cheap visual click bait!”

For Veronica we again get nothing. One line of “Dear Diary, I hate my friends but that doesn’t mean I want them DEAD!” followed by more random cuts of shots from the show, many of bloody scenes and hints of violence but a lot more of just weird confusing scenes that make no sense. It’s kind of funny for the sheer reason that they seem to be banking on people just already knowing who these characters are ala the original movie but at the same time are trying to pull in new audience members with all the vague quick cutting which they seem to have mistaken for ‘mystery’.

And last  but not least, we have Betty Finn. What’s that? “Who if Betty Finn?” all you fans of the Musical ask? Well you wouldn’t know who Betty is unless you watched the MOVIE cuz Betty is who Martha Dump Truck replaced in the Musical because Betty wasn’t fucking sad sacky enough and they didn’t want to clutter the script with such a minor character. Betty was smart and an actual good person, the only good person in the movie honestly, who was Veronica’s friend since they were in diapers. She didn’t have a huge part in the movie outside of providing some blackmail material for JD to use against Heather Duke and trying to get Veronica to stop being such a moron (which failed). Now she’s appears to be the stereotypical side character that will be prominent in the show, probably as a comic relief character or plot device to be used against Veronica at some point.

Now, there is a huge question you have to ask:

Where is Martha? Will Martha even be in the series? Alright, it’s two questions but you get the point.

I have two guesses;

1. Possibly

but more than likely

2. No. Absolutely not.

Why do you ask? Because Martha’s character served as a plot device in both the Movie and the Musical to show how awful the Heathers really were and how their bullying was actually dangerous. Martha was a fat, slow, ugly dump of a girl. Problem is, you can’t make fun of that anymore. It’s not ‘progressive’ to make fun of people with those flaws. As well it wouldn’t make sense, Heather Chandler is fat in this remake. Unless they’re going to go full retard with some kind of ‘internalized fatphobia’ shit it wouldn’t make sense to make fun of Martha for that. Heather McNamara is the stereotypical ditzy airhead which doesn’t seem to have changed in this remake so to make fun of someone being ‘slow’ while laughing at an Air-Head-of-Color would just be super duper mean!

If they DO put Martha in, she will either have to still be dumpy, slow and fat and end up being the most popular character in the end for ‘not giving into societies beauty standards’ or some shit, OR she will have to actually flat out die from her suicide attempt to push the EDGE and drive plot.

Either way this whole thing is going to be a train wreck that will either take off at the idiotic rate in which Teen Wolf and Riverdale did or be an utter failure.

I seriously hope for the latter. Sorry this is so long and there are probably some spelling and grammar errors. It’s literally 2:30 in the morning and the Monster I drank is starting to ware off so I’m running on fumes.

30 Day Trans-Challenge except not really bc my memory is too bad for that so you get it all now Little intro and context for new followers and also for me when I look back at this; I'm a 22 year old trans guy from Canada. I've been out since I was 16 and have been on T for 5 years in October. My top surgery is scheduled for 2019 with Dr McLean in Mississauga, Ontario. 1) When did you realize the term transgender referred to you? In grade 10 one of my best friends started transitioning to male. It was my first exposure to anything trans and everything just fell into place after that. I talked to my partner at the time about it a lot and how my identity suddenly started making sense. After around half a year i started going by male pronouns with my friends and I came out publicly a year later. 2) How did you choose your name, and what names were you thinking about using and why? Contrary to popular belief I didn't choose Cooper because of my high school obsession with Alice Cooper. I ripped it off of a cartoon character that had no discernible gender to me. I was also debating going by Kiefer but after some research found out it connects to Cooper like Bob to Robert and just rolled with it. At some point before transition I asked mom what she would have named me if I was born a boy and she said fucking Wayney (dad's name is Wayne) and yeah no I did not want that name at all 3) Have you ever been outed? Quite often. Surprisingly from the people closest to me. My mom and stepdad out me all the time and my best friend/ex gf used to do it a lot too. She stopped thankfully but my mom keeps insisting on making me a discussion topic 4) How did your family take it when you came out/ if you are not out why aren't you? I came out in stages to my family. Mom was first. I fucked up though and forgot I had a stepbrother and basically walked up to her one day and said “you only have a son” and then ran out of the room? She thought I was running away????? Woops. She was kind of ignorant about some stuff for a while but changed a lot of her views pretty quick. She wasn't initially going to let me medically transition before I was 18 but turned around over time and I started t at 17. Stepdad was awkward but supportive. I didn't come out to my dad. My mom had to for me a year after I'd been out to everyone else. I was terrified of rejection bc yay abandonment issues but it went over well! Right after I came out my dad started dating my step mom and she really helped things bc she wasn't afraid to ask the questions that he was too weird about to do himself. She actually administered my tshots for me for a while. Fast forward to last year and suddenly family I hadn't seen for 9 years wanted to get back in contact with me and mom. I was expecting my grandparents and uncle to be really weird about it but they've always been chill. They used to call me a dyke and tell mom she was a failure bc I wore boy clothes when I was a kid so obviously I was worried. 5) Are you active in the trans community or LGBT community? Not nearly as much as I'd like to be. My local active trans community is 80% 40-60 year old trans ladies. Like I love them to bits and I appreciate them sharing their experiences as older queer people but I feel very out of place there. I've been invited to a gay dude cafe meet a few times but am too nervous to go. That being said, my entire friend circle is trans sans a few sprinkled cis people. So I guess we're all just an informal support group lmao 6) Who was the first person you told about being trans? My first partner. She was super queer (was identifying as a bi male at the time we dated) and very understanding and supported me through a lot of the mental gymnastics of realizing I was a dude. 7) Who do you look up to? My friends, honestly. Like I don't know what else to say here lmao 8) How do you deal with being misgendered in the beginning of transitioning by people? Told them politely to only use he/him with me. If they were malicious about it I would try to explain how ignorant that was and if they still didn't get the hint I'd ignore them. 9) What is something positive about being trans? I don't have to hide awkward boners. 10) What are some of your fears in regards to being trans? I'm super afraid of top surgery ending in a result im unhappy with. Like I don't care about the pectoral scarring at all, but I'm worried about proportional problems or dog earring. Basically anything that would require a revision. I'm also super insecure about not having a bio dick. It limits me a lot sexually even with strap ons. No harnesses stay where they need to on me to get anything good happening and my dick always slowly drifts downward. Its frustrating. 11) How do you manage dysphoria? Hahahaahhaa ice cream And usually taking nudes. 12) What are you doing to stay healthy for transitioning mentally and physically? I'm working out every day now. Nothing too intense, but it feels nice. I want to drop about 30-40 pounds before top surgery so am slowly amping up the workouts. Mentally I'm a disaster and am frantically looking for a psychiatrist but can't find any open that have experience with a trans patient. 13) Bathrooms I haven't used a women's bathroom since before I was in testosterone. I'm not anxious about them at all unless there's a lot of drunk dudes or the locks on the stalls don't work. 14) What are some of your passing tips or things you do to pass? Confidence. Fake it till you make it. Being a walking masc alt stereotype got me through high school. 15) How have you embraced your trans identity? Tbh coming out and living life as trans is one of the few times I've been able to do one very important thing consistently: do something for myself no matter what people think. Its something that I've been trying to spread into other aspects of my life. If anything, my trans identity embraced me. 16) What's your rock anthem and why? I think this is the only answer that hasn't changed since last time I did this. I Am, I'm Me from Twisted Sister. 17) What's your binding choice and why? I use a GC2B binder. They're comfy, last long, don't roll, don't have prominent seams, and don't smell funky like my old underworks ones. If I swim publicly or want to slim out my hips for special occasions I wear a full length underworks swim binder. Fun fact: I didn't bind for a year and half bc I gained a fuckwad of weight and my tits passed as moobs. 18) How do you feel about the trans laws where you live? They're getting better. I live in Ontario, Canada so am pretty protected all around. I wish the technical side of transition (name, gender marker) was more streamlined. 19) If you're religious how do your views effect being trans? if you're not religious what about your family religions? I'm in no way religious. My mom had to jump through a bunch of hoops in her head to legitimize my transition through her religion/spirituality. Its a little disturbing to me for details I will not share publicly. 20) Do you want to be a parent? why or why not? I hate children. Keep them away from me. 21) Your views on the cis-gendered community? ??¿¿ they exist. I believe education about trans people and other queer identities should be taught in schools to help cis society not be as blissfully ignorant. I don't believe all cis people hate trans people, but they do have a lot of misconceptions about the community. 22) Do you feel being trans holds you back from your career choice? Fuck no. Honestly I haven't felt nervous about transition affecting my work since my first job. I was just coming out when I worked the museum and was scared they might kick me from the position. Nowadays, I do not disclose my trans status to potential employers until they're hiring me. I thankfully live in a place and time where I'm protected as a trans person in the workplace by the law so haven't felt held back at all. 23) What stereotypes are put on trans people? Undercuts Tbh The stereotypes that stick out to me are the fucking weight ones. Where the fuck are my chunky trans men and ladies at? As a trans guy I am pressured a lot by the representation in the community to aspire to be a buff/cut beefcake or stick thin. Hell, a few of my already very small trans girl friends think they're not as valid bc their bust/waist/hip ratio doesn't make them look like a model. There's literally nothing wrong with being any weight but I find the pressure to be small is even higher within the trans and queer community to fit the stereotype/preconception that we have to be conventionally beautiful to be valid in our identity. 24) Who is your favorite LGBT actor/musician/director/artist etc and why? Uhhhhhhh Tbh I don't even know 25) Doctor visits? I hate them. They make everything about my trans status even if I'm there for something completely unrelated. There is FREE training on trans care for doctors in our part of the province but none seem to opt for it and instead decide its appropriate to ask me transition questions when I'm there for something as unrelated as an impacted nail. 26) Do you feel comfortable answering questions about being trans if say your teacher/friend/stranger asked you? If I'm not paying for their time, if I'm not busy doing something else, and if they are polite, yes. I don't mind answering questions at all! But there's a time and a place and some people just don't understand that. 27) What goals do you have? Lose weight and tone up a bit in time for top surgery. Be aggressively body positive. Continually try to normalize trans bodies. Find a local community to be a part of. 28) What is something you have to do everyday or else you feel like your whole day is off if you don't do it? Shower. If I go out or if people outside of friend circle are near me I have to have my packer and binder. If I'm alone I need music or something on at all times. 29) Write out something positive about yourself using the letters of your name. Ex. Your name is Bob so B-Beautiful O-Outstanding B-Boy Um. I don't have a good name for this uhhh C-Creative O-Open hearted O-Okay P-Phenomenon E-Eager R-Rad I had to Google positive words to do that lmao 30) Write a haiku about being trans I hate writing these Please just cut off my titties Throw them in the fire

excessive hc meme: 2, 13, 19, 23, 34, 42

☛ GET INSIDE YOUR CHARACTER’S HEAD! aka The Excessively Detailed Headcanon Meme || Accepting

2. Do they have any daily rituals?

He tries not to have a set routine that occurs everyday, since those routines can get a person killed.  He wakes up at the same time each day, no matter how little sleep he got.  Writing down in his journal any thoughts or memories is a good daily ritual for him.  It helps Bucky feel grounded along with piecing together his mind to hopefully figure everything out in the end.  Cleaning his guns and weapons, or at least checking to make sure no one has found him, is something he does on a daily basis.  Right now, his daily routines more so revolve around staying alive and learning about the current era.

13. Sexual Orientation? And, regardless of own orientation, thoughts on sexual orientation in general?

I rp Bucky as bisexual.  He prefers the opposite sex but is also attracted to the same sex.  He is a bit overwhelmed with the amount of different sexual orientations in the current era, but he isn’t going to judge someone for their orientation.  He is willing to listen and learn before he passes judgement, but the issue seems to small in comparison to the world around him.  

19. What do they think about before falling asleep at night?

This one depends on what happened that day.  Most of the time, he is trying to remember and piece together things he has forgotten.  Other times he can be bombarded by memories that may have been triggered due to an event that happened or a mission he went on.  Usually he sends up a prayer that he can have a peaceful sleep free of nightmares.  

23.How organized are they? How does this organization/disorganization manifest in their everyday life?

I wouldn’t say he was ever super messy, but he developed the cliche army organization.  He will always put items back in the same place when he is done using them and doesn’t have too much clutter.  Since he still hasn’t found a true home, he doesn’t see the reason in putting down roots with “filler” items that might personalize his temporary living arrangements.  This organization manifests in how he goes about his life.  Anything he purchases or does usually is for self reliance or improvement.  He hasn’t gotten to the point of enjoying life yet in a relaxed manner.  He still feels out of place and not certain where he belongs.

34.Thoughts on privacy? (Are they a private person, or are they prone to ‘TMI’?)

He can be a bit outspoken and boisterous, especially when he was younger, but he is a private person.  Especially after everything that happened to him.  He does bury a lot and keep things to himself.  He might cover it up with tmi remarks to kind of divert a conversation, but he is a gentleman and still has his old upbringing.  Everyone has a right to a private life and they shouldn’t be pressured to share things they don’t want to.  There is a time and place for everything.  He isn’t going to judge someone for being too TMI unless it gets out of hand and the person needs to learn to keep their mouth shut.

42.How far did they get in formal education? What are their views on formal education vs self-education?

I rp Bucky as having a high school education.  He never got the chance to go to college due to enlisting, but he isn’t stupid.  He excels at his studies and would have done very well in college.  Bucky was pretty much the kid that didn’t have to work hard at certain subjects like math and science, which many others struggled with.  Not saying he didn’t struggle with other studies, but he got above average grades and could have easily received scholarships for both his studies and sports.

His views are mixed.  When he was younger, in his era, a lot of teens didn’t exactly go past high school due to various reasons.  Even Bucky would have already had a job to help his family our financially while in high school along with being a big brother.  I don’t have much knowledge of his era but I know it was a different time.  Nowadays, I think he would still feel that formal education is better than self-education because you develop more skills from being in a formal education system.  You might be intellectually better off in a self education, but nothing beats good old fashion schooling to help you develop a better sense of yourself.

I'm going to ask the most broad and annoying question so forgive me, but what happened to everyone after Through the Gay Days ended? I have never been more invested in a group of characters in my life and I desperately want them all to be happy, whatever form that takes, in the end. Also! what other sources did you draw from besides Coming Out Under Fire? I was so impressed with how well researched everything was. 💖

OH MAN I didn’t expect to actually get a question, lol!! And that’s one I’m happy to answer, because I did think a lot about it. idk if I’m ever going to actually write a follow up, because my WIP list is soooo long and, tbh, the 50s are SO DEPRESSING in terms of LGBT stuff.

IT TOOK ME AN HOUR TO WRITE THIS UP. I APOLOGIZE. UNDER A CUT BECAUSE HOLY FUCK. I apologize for any typos but I’m just publishing instead of proofreading because what the fuck.

In terms of sources... I really think Coming Out Under Fire was the main “intentional” one. I have a BA in history and I’m getting my MA right now, so I’ve READ a lot of history and probably unconsciously drew on a lot. the other one I can definitely think of is Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers, by Lillian Faderman, which covers lesbian U.S. history from the early 1900s to the 1980s. she draws on COUF for her 40s chapter (which is kind of a bummer because I was hoping for more WWII lesbian-specific content lol), but she’s good at covering some of the broad-strokes history of sexuality and LGBTQ identity. Becoming Visible by Molly McGarry is a really cool illustrated history, too, I’ve read that a few times over the years.

SO, for post-war lives, I’m going to warn you real quick it does get depressing for everybody for a little bit because uhhh the 50s fucking sucked? Faderman talks about this a lot, and actually Stephanie Coontz is a good source too--she has this book titled The Way We Never Were, which basically debunks the idea of “the ~traditional~ family” and looks at the ways our perceptions of society’s values have changed. and one thing she points out is that the 1950s are really the first time when society looks at single men--all single men--and thinks “there must be something WRONG with them.” before that, people were willing to accept that some dudes just didn’t want to get married, for plenty of reasons that had nothing to do with homosexuality, but in the 50s everyone was so gungho about The Family that anyone not into it was looked at with suspicion. add that to the whole “homosexuals are susceptible to Communist blackmail, better fire them all” and things fucking sucked.

I PROMISE HAPPY ENDINGS, THOUGH, because the whole “LGBTQ people lived depressing lives until these Enlightened Times” trope is my least favorite trope ever.

SO, for Gene Roe, my first thought for his post-war life was this Gaslight Anthem lyric that @antiquecompass prompted me for a Snafu/Roe fic foreverrrrrr again: “I’m in love with the way you’re in love with the night.” so I imagine that Snafu comes home, and they try to just settle into things as usual, but Snafu starts really pushing Gene’s buttons. being more snide, being disrespectfully obvious about being nonmonogamous (like it’s one thing to go cruising and another to bring dudes home to the apartment you’re sharing with your boyfriend, COME ON MAN), trying to pick fights. and of course the impetus for all this is Snafu struggling with PTSD and thinking that Gene is too good for him but not being able to end it himself. of course Gene doesn’t put up with this bs, so one day Snafu finally admits he’s doing this because he’s afraid the war turned him into kind of a fucked up asshole, and Gene’s like “you were always a fucked up asshole? what’s your point? I love you?”

so then things kinda simmer down. Gene’s not Officially a doctor anymore, but he and Snafu live in an apartment building in the poorer part of the city with a lot of ~ethnic~ folk nearby some black neighborhoods, so he does some informal community doctoring around those buildings, and that earns him enough goodwill that he and Snafu don’t really have to worry about getting caught out. it’s the kind of neighborhood where a lot of people have to... bend the law a bit to get by, to be happy, whatever, so people trade food and skills as needed and there’s always an alert if the cops are coming by. it’s a good place for them. they’re happy. I’ve only really thought ahead like ~ten years, but I can imagine them eventually moving on when the community moves on, you know, whether to another city or somewhere a little more rural, depending, and that being okay. and I think, with Gene’s influence, and seeing how strong the ties are between the Pansies with Parachutes(TM), Snafu is able to reach out to Sledge and Burgie and the rest more than irl/show canon.

Babe and Spina are the other two that totally make it, soulmates, heartbreakingly cute. but I promised a little heartbreaking, so basically my idea is that they actually move in together a little while after the war, but at some point Babe’s mom realizes what’s up and... does not take it well. gives him an ultimatum, break up with Ralph or she won’t let him near the family, which Babe finds agonizing because he’s really close with his family but Ralph doesn’t have very many relatives, at least not close by (in this verse at least), and even if he could bring himself to break up with Ralph, at this point he doesn’t think his mom will ever treat him the same anyway.

in my head there’s a really sweet scene when Ralph finds out what happens and a lot of hugging and comforting. but yeah. that briefly sucks. what DOESN’T suck is when Babe decides, after a few months, that he has to tell Bill (because Bill has gotten so close to the Heffrons that of course he notices when Babe suddenly isn’t speaking to them), and Bill proves himself to be a total Bro who decides that, well, the typical idea of a homosexual CLEARLY doesn’t fit Babe and Spina so... it’s all good? like c’mon they went through a war together, that’s worth something, right?

I think eventually Babe and Spina move, too. not super far, just maybe to, idk, New York, Pittsburgh, Baltimore, somewhere they can visit everyone but maybe far enough to put some distance between them and bad memories, and also because South Philly is small when your family isn’t speaking to you, you know? possibly they end up in the same city as Luz and Tipper (see next), I’m not 100% sure but I’m vaguely attracted to the idea of everybody ending up on a commune, lol.

so I think I’m probably meanest to Luz, because I imagine him getting arrested at some point. sorry, boo. his reaction is to pay the fine and slink out, and get out of dodge for a while to avoid his family getting any blowback, and he ends up visiting Tipper, who’s really frustrated (which I alluded to a bit at the end of Through the Gay Days) because he just doesn’t click with his old friends as much and he hasn’t had a lot of luck romantically. and again I have this clear scene in my head of Tipper helping Luz dress in drag for the first time, lots of giggling and teasing, but Tipper doesn’t really do drag anymore because he can’t keep his balance in heels, and they end up talking about their frustrations and venting and whatnot. and eventually Luz is like “you know what? fuck it! run away with me!”

and Tipper’s like “fuck it, let’s do it!” so they just kind of live a semi-nomadic life? idk, maybe not really nomadic, but they get jobs that let them move/travel, so they don’t have the pressure of expectations. I’m on the fence about whether they do this as lovers... I would say not, like, REALLY. like possibly a friends with benefits thing (and I’ll point out that Luz is one of the only other named characters who interacts with Tipper, other than Liebgott, because Tipper’s in charge of the map during the Major Horton scene, so that chemistry could totally work). because they’re, like, the two from the fic whose relationships don’t end up going anywhere, and I don’t want them to pine after the Joes forever, and they don’t, but sometimes people just don’t find their soulmates, it happens, and they can at least make each other happy.

this is one of those verses where I’ve decided Liebgott gets to keep his wife-and-kids dream. I do think he’s gay in this verse, and when he gets engaged he writes a letter to Tipper basically seeking closure, admitting he dealt with things in kind of a shitty way and admitting it might be nice to have a Gay Posse, but he also takes his marriage seriously even if it’s not a love match, and doesn’t seek romantic or sexual encounters with men. idk if Joe Toye actually gets married in this verse, but I don’t see him as gay. if we were to retroactively apply the Kinsey scale, I’d say he’d be a 1 or a 2, in which the situational aspect of war kind of pushed him towards interactions that he may have subconsciously desired, but definitely wouldn’t acknowledge in a normal time and place.

as for Chuck! I kind of like the future I give Chuck, partly because he conveniently is from the LA area. so for him, I imagine that at some point Ron Speirs just kind of shows up on his doorstep one day and they become, like, an actual Thing. and it’s good for a couple of years, but Ron seems... restless. and eventually Chuck sits him down and flat-out says “look, I really don’t think you’re cut out for this settled-down long-term-relationship kind of thing. we had a good run, we can part on good terms, but you can travel and have adventures and do all the stuff you want to do.” and then, correctly, points out that one of the reasons Speirs is so reluctant to do that is because he feels guilty for Chuck getting shot, which doesn’t really make any sense. Chuck’s only request is that Ron NOT GO BACK INTO THE ARMY, because fuck Korea, have you heard how many gay soldiers are getting kicked out of the military nowadays? Speirs agrees and they break up amicably.

(is Chuck still in love with him? yes. does it hurt like a motherfucker? yes.)

ANYWAY. the L.A. is where the Mattachine Society, the first official homosexual organization in the country, was founded in 1948... or maybe 49. I forget. the founder started asking around a while before he found people who were actually willing to join up. I figure Chuck eventually joins up and is the first of the Pansies with Parachutes(TM) to really develop a political gay identity. and through that org he eventually meets Beth, a lesbian who’s just broken up with her gf and is kind of panicking because now she might have to leave her apartment and go back to her parents in Nebraska, and they become fast friends and fuck it, why not get married? it’s good cover, and I could have also gotten a chance to talk about the working class lesbian bar scene in the 1950s, which is a cool topic.

if this were a formal fic, I would end it with 1952, when the entire group reunites in honor of the 10-year anniversary of them meeting at Toccoa. since it’s not, suffice to say they do have all-group reunions, and they also visit each other and call and write letters and stay friends 5ever. at some point Babe and Spina have a not-wedding (there’s a picture of a wedding in the 50s with two grooms in flower crowns in Becoming Visible, I love that picture) and they all come and celebrate. OH and at some point between Luz getting arrested and meeting with Tipper, he definitely visits Gene in Louisiana and they make out a bit. because, tbh, I caught a bit of UST in Through the Gay Days--I don’t know if it’s a ship I’d ship in any other verse, lol, but in this verse I feel like they need to make out.

anyway. eventually the 50s end. I want to say that by the time Stonewall happens, either Tipper&Luz or Babe/Spina (both??) are living in NYC and for three days everyone is frantically calling each other going “DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THIS???” and Chuck becomes totally into the California gay scene, and Babe’s nieces and nephews eventually reach out to him, Tipper and Luz either... idk, become real boyfriends or get hot younger boyfriends and become Wise Gay Dads to the younger crowd. Snafu and Gene grow old together, as hard as it is to imagine old Snafu.

EVERYBODY IS HAPPY AND FRIENDS AND GAY, THE END.

Riverdale: The Most Unreliable Narrator?

Full spoilers…

Riverdale quickly became one of my favorite new shows of this season, bridging smart teen drama with a murder mystery and a darker, Film Noirish tone. The show shoots for a mix of Twin Peaks and Dawson’s Creek and absolutely nails it. I’m definitely excited by the prospect of the show leaning even farther into the Twin Peaks side, potentially introducing Lovecraftian beasts and concepts next season! Riverdale was co-created by the author of the excellent Afterlife with Archie and The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, so a leap into that kind of horror shouldn’t be surprising.

With that in mind, I have what could be an insane theory…

Jughead narrates the series, but to my recollection, he’s never directly commented on himself when narrating. What if this isn’t just him keeping authorial distance while writing his true crime book about the events in town? At the end of the pilot, the narration even commented on an iconic scene of Archie, Jughead, Betty, and Veronica at a Pop Tate’s booth, saying “To someone on the outside peering in, it would’ve looked like there were four people in that booth. But I was there. And I can tell you, really, there were only three: a blonde girl, a raven-haired girl, and the luckiest redheaded boy in the universe.” That line has stuck with me for how odd it was that Jughead doesn’t even consider himself a person—at least not one worth mentioning—but what if Jughead isn’t speaking? What if Jughead is not the narrator?

What if the Narrator is just something with Cole Sprouse’s voice? We know Jughead was supposed to go on a road trip with Archie over the summer, but Archie ditched him to go camping with Fake Miss Grundy. Still, Jughead asked for a lawyer when questioned by Sheriff Keller and Fred Andrews gave him a fake alibi. Why would Jughead need an alibi? Is it possible he doesn’t remember what happened to him, because he was infected/possessed by whatever otherworldly beasts we might meet next season? It seemed odd to me that one blown-off road trip was enough to destroy Archie and Jughead’s friendship, but what if Archie not being there led to something horrible happening to Jughead that he can’t remember? That, I could buy driving a wedge between them like the one we saw at the beginning of the season. To leave all trappings of the grounded world of the show behind for a minute, I think one of these Lovecraftian terrors could be talking to us each week as the Narrator from within Jughead, and neither he nor we know it. It wouldn’t consider Jughead a person anymore, but a vessel it uses to walk around Riverdale.

Jughead is already something of a Lovecraft-styled hero in his detachment, isolation, and authorial pursuits. The word jughead was slang for a stupid person; clearly Jones isn’t a fool, but what if he just doesn’t realize what’s happening to him? He said in episode 10 that something was “wrong” with him, but what if that’s not just teen melodrama?  What if we haven’t seen Jughead eating many burgers (though he was scarfing them down the prequel comic) because of some side-effect of his possession? If Jughead isn’t fully Jughead and doesn’t know it, that makes him a pretty perfect match for Betty. The show revealed early on that she has some sort of dissociative disorder where she believes that she’s her sister Polly sometimes, but doesn’t remember it. I read this as her needing Polly to feel safe as a kid, and that she still needs “Polly” to cope with her parents’ pressure as a teen. If Jughead’s sorta in the same boat, I think helping each other through their issues would be a cool way to develop and deepen their relationship. Just like “Polly” broke through, what if Jughead lines like “It’s the Dark Ages…” aren’t just super-angsty declarations, but subconscious inklings of what’s really happening to him and the town around them? Is it possible that whatever’s in Jughead is not evil, but looking to save people from its own kind? If they go full, hopeless Lovecraft, probably not.

Alice Cooper made a crack about the Blossoms “worshipping some dark pagan god” in their gothic manor and in the latest episode Cheryl commented that her grandmother has gypsy blood (just as Grandma Blossom was using a crystal to correctly predict Polly is pregnant with twins). What if these aren’t throwaway lines, but hints at what’s to come; at what’s already creeping into the town? What if Jason’s death was accidental? What if it were a botched “baptism” of sorts (look at what Cheryl and Jason are wearing in those flashbacks: odd clothes to run away with your secret pregnant girlfriend in), where he was supposed to receive one of these Lovecraftian beasts? Perhaps it went south and one of his parents shot him in the head to stop it. Cheryl said Jason was “supposed to come back” early on. What if she meant “back to life” in a very literal sense (maybe temporary death is part of the process of being host to whatever they’re summoning) and not just him faking his death? If that’s true, maybe Cheryl did kill him to save him from full possession. What if Jughead happened by on his unexpectedly solo road trip, and that’s how he accidentally got the Narrator in his head? What if great grandfather Blossom killing great-grandfather Cooper was the result of a similarly failed communion with something dark, which started a feud because neither family wanted to accept blame for screwing up? Alternatively, the dark ritual could’ve been successful, starting the maple syrup company, and then Blossom really did cut Cooper out of it. Maybe Grandpa Blossom had his cut throat in a similar ritual to re-up on their demonic prosperity. I’m thinking the Lodges got the Blossoms out of trouble with the law (whether the murder of Great-grandpa Cooper was supernatural or not), and the payments the Blossoms were sending them all these years were repayment. What if the land everyone’s fighting for was the site where that original attempt went down, and the Blossoms need it to re-secure their fortune/future? That’d line up nicely with possibly-possessed Jughead actually living on the grounds for a long time. What if Undead Jason isn’t just a nod to Afterlife with Archie; isn’t just a guilt-driven hallucination, but a harbinger of these Lovecraftian beasts? What if Dilton has seen these beasts too (maybe via one of his inventions?) and that’s why he’s become a crazy survivalist? Maybe he’s training his scouts to protect them from what he knows is out there.

What if Fake Miss Grundy (a classic Greg Berlanti misdirect/repurposing of a comic book character, btw) is connected to these things and delivers teen boys to them as part of some kind of ritual? It was implied she was sleeping with Jason Blossom too and the last time we saw her, she’d already set her sights on another teenage boy; what if Fake Grundy (and possibly, possessed Jughead) killed Jason as a sacrifice or something? It’s also possible he was always intended to be the sacrifice, but was killed by someone else first. What if Archie was next, but Grundy had to wait for a preordained time or something and got kicked out of town before it could happen? Is that why he’s the “luckiest redheaded boy in the universe?” Is that why the Blossoms keep putting an unsettling amount of focus on the fact that Archie looks so much like Jason, because he was going to replace him in their ritual (either literally swapping his soul with Jason's, wherever it is, or just taking Jason's physical place in this hypothetical ritual)? I now think Cheryl’s being groomed to take Jason’s place since Archie bailed, but this could be a reason to suddenly charm Archie into their inner circle. That could imply Grundy and the Blossoms were on the same side, unless there are competing dark things out there. What if Archie’s stage fright manifestation of the jocks in werewolf masks was a result of coming into contact with magic via Miss Grundy, allowing him a glimpse behind the terrifying, sanity-shattering curtain? Though, that wouldn’t explain the mask Archie had in his drawer.

Why not go full-on crazy? What if Fake Miss Grundy is actually Real Miss Grundy given youth (or the appearance of youth) as the means to complete her side of the bargain with these theoretical beasts? What if stealing the identity of a dead woman is just a cover for an extremely long life? An old woman posing as a young one is a classic witch M.O., and we know there are witches just across the river in Greendale (Sabrina among them). I thought the Grundy storyline was the show’s one weak spot so far: it ended without enough punishment for her and without fully dealing with what this statutory rape did to Archie emotionally (as with most parent/teacher relationships on TV), but what if she’s coming back for a supernatural metaphor on that very subject?

Sure, a second season could just go full Afterlife With Archie and do zombies, but Lovecraftian beasts would be so much more original and fun in my opinion. Besides zombies feeling endgame with most everyone probably dying, everyone’s doing them nowadays. Lovecraft-esque twists on the 50s/60s-pulp monsters the Archie gang faced on Archie’s Weird Mysteries would be my dream season. And if one of those beasts drove its victims crazy, making them only see the world in “Classic Archie Vision” like Jughead’s nightmare, then I’d be all for that! What if that’s exactly what Jughead’s nightmare actually is?

I do think Jason’s killer (and likely their motive) is human, but I don’t think that eliminates the potential for events and characters around his death to be supernatural in nature. I think it’d be so easy to subtly shift context and throw the show we know into this dark supernatural world. What if the events that change Riverdale in the finale are the opening of seams between Riverdale and wherever these beasts are coming from?

What do you think? Is this crazy, or could it happen? Would you want it to?

A lot of people seem to miss the point on otaku culture in V3 to a pretty severe degree. There's a reason why Shirogane is the ringleader people.

I feel as though alot of people in the western part of the fandom might be sort of unfamiliarwith how much the idea of being an “otaku” is intrinsically tied with verynegative connotations in Japan. It’s easy in the west to treat it as a kind offunny term which basically just means really liking anime or Japanese media ingeneral, but it goes much deeper than that.

There is quite a lot of societal pressure to succeed in theJapanese education system. The same applies anywhere, of course, moresonowadays when millennials get looked down on no matter what they do or don’t doand the opportunities for successful jobs are slimmer than ever. But in Japanspecifically, there is a high rate of depression and suicide attempts amonghigh school students who cannot “keep up” or “fit in” with the pressure tosucceed academically.

These pressures include not only the usual things such asgetting good grades and getting accepted into a good school, but alsoexpectations such as attending club and cram school in one’s “free time.” Notparticipating in club activities or going to cram school (preferably a very good, well-accepted cram school) meansnot trying one’s hardest. And all of this, of course, is on top of otherexpectations such as responding to familial obligations, hanging out withfriends, possibly even having a part-time job. And school is five days a weekwith an extra half day on Saturday, usually.

Understandably, this pressure is just way too much torespond to sometimes. There are many high schoolers who respond to the pressureby simply holing themselves up in their rooms, refusing to participate in anyof it, passively rebelling against the norm by engaging instead in activitiesor interests which aren’t usually considered important or interesting to “normalpeople.” Otaku and NEET culture definitely emerged as a result of this forcedpressure to succeed—and the stigma associated with being considered either ofthese things is very negative.

I feel as though DR as a franchise has always tried toreflect and provide commentary on these super unrealistic expectations of highschoolers in its plot. The very concept of “SHSL talents” and Hope’s Peak as aschool for only the best and brightest in dr1 was very much a metaphor for theways in which only the smartest,strongest, most talented students will be provided the environment and materialsthey need to succeed, while the rest will be thrown by the wayside. Sdr2’s anddr3’s addition of the reserve course and Hinata’s character arc only fleshedthis metaphor out further.

Just as in real life, in DR, students who don’t exhibit any “noteworthy”talents or abilities are discarded and thought of as useless to society. There’sso much pressure and so many expectations on these kids that not being able torise up to those expectations causes them to want to do basically one of twothings: 1.) Give up and die, quite literally. Or 2.) Escape somewhere else withsome other option where they don’t have to respond to these expectations andcan be around people with similar interests and mindsets instead.

It’s not a coincidence that we’ve had a variety of otaku orNEET characters in DR throughout the years.

While Yamada was little more than a joke character, it couldbe argued that he’s the one who first started the whole “2D > 3D” languagethat is featured very prominently in ndrv3 with Tsumugi later on (my mind keepsgoing back to the “Yamada timeline” fake ndrv3 spoiler and I keep laughing).Meanwhile, more recently added characters to the franchise like Mitarai,Saihara, Tsumugi have touched heavily on what it means to truly become arecluse from society and reject the world around you.

Because of the way in which societal pressure quiteliterally can drive students to want to kill themselves, there’s definitely anunderlying degree of sympathy in the DR franchise with most characters who holethemselves up in order to engage in some kind of fiction or escape fromsociety. The pressure to succeed, to socialize, to behave “normally” whilestill striving to be “the best” and compete with everyone around you, isimmense and ruthless, and I’ve always respected that DR as a franchise handledthe topic rather well in addressing that it’s perfectly normal andunderstandable to be unable to respond to that pressure.

But the series has also not shied away from touching on the muchmore negative aspects of otaku/NEET culture too, and I also appreciate that. Asmuch as DR includes gross jokes and character tropes that it shouldn’t, it canbe serious when it tries to be. The ways in which otaku culture can and hasbeen used to defend very gross/insensitive topics by claiming “it’s just fiction,” “it’s not hurtinganybody,” etc. is something that got brought up specifically in ndrv3, and I’mvery, very glad for it.

Tsumugi’s desire to escape into the realm of fiction and “theworld of Danganronpa” because of the escape it presents from reality is easy tosee from an otaku context. Unlike the real world, where more questionable orsensitive subjects would never get to be thrown about carelessly, anything goesin fiction as far as Tsumugi is concerned. DR is a world based upon tropes,parodies, and super-caricaturized fictional characters. Blood, gore, death,sexual innuendo, you name it: it all goes, and it’s considered “exciting” andan “escape” from unchanging, bland, everyday reality—“because it’s justfiction.”

Ndrv3 highlights very clearly the dangers of throwingoneself into this mindset too thoroughly and too wholeheartedly. By castingaway one’s willingness to actually interact with or open up to people and to acceptthat reality is something which can be impacted by our choices and ourinterests, we run a very dangerous risk of not caring about anything thathappens as long as we can turn a blind eye to it.

There’s a very clear reason why Saihara and Tsumugi andprobably many of the other ndrv3 characters were so convinced that the killinggame show was “the best” and the onlypossible escape from the pressure in their lives: because they were taught tothink so. Because they lived in a society which made them feel worthless aslong as they weren’t performing according to ridiculous and extremeexpectations, and if they couldn’t perform to those then it’d be better off tobe part of something else that could actually help them forget about the realworld entirely.

Tsumugi as the ringleader in ndrv3 is undeniably aninteresting choice, and she’s absolutely incredible as an antagonist. The factthat she switches from seemingly harmless otaku who makes occasional referencesto visual novels and anime for most of the game to an incredibly effectiveblank-slate chameleon who has no empathy and no sense of self is chilling—moresoknowing that she’s actually a producer forthe show, in the same way that Mitarai who had a similar problem of escapingreality (though without being evil) made anime, rather than just consuming it.Again, I maintain my stance that Kodaka’s not trying to make fans of DR out tobe the villain in ndrv3: quite the contrary, it’s Team Danganronpa and thepeople who staff it who are seen as the biggest problem.

This was really fun to write about, thank you so much anon! There’sa lot with DR that comes back to these themes and social commentary, and I wasvery glad to see ndrv3 continue that trend. The franchise is hardly perfect,but its willingness to criticize the horrible societal pressure that’s soprevalent in Japan has been a constant, and it’s something I think Kodakareally does feel strongly about.