ADJALA BREKKER
POV : Ur so obsessed with the idea of Kaz Brekker having an adopted sister who is the only thread between his past and present that you wrote a whole ass fanfic and are now posting your first fanart of her on a platform for millions to see.
*In a soft smoll bby voice* : Her name is Adjala btw and she has thirteen knives...... and she simps for Inej secretly like her bro.... she ships kanej to......
• AND SHE'S A BAD B!TCH WHO BURNT DOWN EMERALD PALACE FOR HER BROTHER!!!!!
• ‘This city shows no remorse. Much like myself if I dare say.’
• LITERALLY MURDERED A TON OF GOONS FOR HER HUSBAND!!!!
• She likes to kneel down...... To Inej Ghafa
• Is the saint of the dead b!tches
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SHADOW BROKER: INTERCEPTED pt2
Subject(s): Tali’Zorah vas Normandy, Garrus Vakarian, Jane Shepard, Jeff Moreau
Location(s): Normandy SR2, Omega Nebula
Mode(s): text, group communication, screen captures
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20:15- [Tali has added Jane Shepard, Garrus Vakarian and Jeff Moreau to a chat]
20:15- [Tali named the chat Saren Hate Club]
20:16- [Jeff Moreau changed their name to Joker]
20:16- [Jane Shepard changed their name to Shepard]
20:17- [Garrus Vakarian changed Shepard’s name to Jane]
20:18- JANE: fuck off
20:18- GARRUS VAKARIAN: are we not on a first name basis, Jane?
20:18- [Jane changed Garrus Vakarian’s name to Assangel]
20:18- TALI: why do we put up with him
20:18- JOKER: he’s a diversity hire
20:18- JANE: his Cerberus dossier called him a ‘tactical genius’. shoulda guessed he was a smartass
20:18- ASSANGEL: words hurt
20:19- TALI: Gabby and Ken are driving me crazy they need to just KISS ALREADY
20:19- ASSANGEL: do quarians kiss the same as humans and asari?
20:19- JANE: yup
20:19- ASSANGEL: personal experience, Jane?
20:19- JANE: i use this crazy thing called the extranet, you should try it some time
20:19- JOKER: are you two gonna kiss?
20:19- JANE: in his dreams
20:20- ASSANGEL: you know… the other day Shepard told me about this extremely enlightening human game
20:20- JANE: no garrus
20:20- ASSANGEL: they call it ‘fuck, marry, kill’
20:20- TALI: humans are quite simple creatures aren’t they?
20:20- ASSANGEL: indeed
20:21- JANE: alright, i see how things are
20:21- JOKER: Aria, Sparatus and Udina
20:21- JANE: nope
20:21- ASSANGEL: fuck Aria, marry Sparatus and kill Udina
20:21- TALI: switch Aria and Sparatus
20:22- JANE: Sparatus is such an uptight asshole (like most turians). could never marry that guy
20:22- ASSANGEL: well… i hope so. if you know what i mean
20:22- JOKER: nice
20:22- JANE: hah ur gay
20:22- ASSANGEL: is anyone on this ship straight?
20:22- TALI: Zaeed maybe
20:23- JOKER: you really think that guy remembers all his sexual encounters?
20:23- TALI: maybe Grunt?
20:23- ASSANGEL: ive never heard of a gay krogan
20:23- JANE: you ever asked one?
20:23- ASSANGEL: Shepard, i didn’t even know krogan were capable of higher thought processes until I met Wrex
20:23- JANE: god you’re the worst
20:23- TALI: xenophobe
20:23- JOKER: i would actually argue that he’s a xenophile
20:23- JANE: why’s that?
20:23- ASSANGEL: please don’t
20:23- JOKER: big guy asked me for human/turian porn recs
20:23- TALI: HE WHAT
20:23- JANE: BUSTED
20:25- [Assangel changed their name to Garrus]
20:25- GARRUS: you’re terribly mistaken
20:25- JANE: joker, thank you. i owe you one. think t’soni would want this info?
20:25- TALI: already sent it
20:25- JANE: i think this is the best day of my life
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since the funny pink house seems to be stocked full of basic necessities do you think there might be alcohol in there i'm now just imagining them all being completely wankered off various spirits
do you think they'd use it to escape their reality ? maybe there isn't any in the house because it would 100% be abused, by red guy especially i'd imagine
thinking about if they were there while the time child visited
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