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soldier-poet-king · 4 months

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I'm experiencing existential shrimp emotions and yet still expected to play nice and go to work and it's just. Man. Man. I wanna sit around and think and feel until I reach some sort of tenable equilibrium. Not just crush the intensity under my heel into apathy, or at least the false facade of apathy. I care too deeply! Let me care about every little thing intensely and consumptively! I don't WANT to not be like this.

#work is good work can be good work is a worthy task #this isnt anti work #this is just anti work right now while im Experiencing Things #anyway sleep did NOT remedy yesterdays emotional time from finishing my durge run in bg3 #just. i cant think about it without going wild again #all new emotions unlocked #i cannot stop thinking abt astarion and durge and shared monstrosity and autonomy and freedom #and choosing to grow and be better and how awful and scary and terrible it is #when there is nothing left. you have nothing of yourself left #and you sitll have to go on and choose what you want to be #and that's so terrifying and so good #im kinda. like. the most insanely jealous ive ever been in my life #u know the sea longing? the soul deep ache for smthn you know you wont ever have?#because it's not for people like you. or that the acquisition would destroy you? or smthn else #but it's just. yeah. yeah. i am experiencing things #partially just maybe that dopamine crash. y'know the post concert blues #except not a concert. just a really good game. a really good story #i havent felt this intensely abt a game in awhile #or not for this long. it didn't linger to this extent.#alas. work to do.chores to do.etc etc etc #im so ready for vacation next week. im tired.#like on the one hand i need long term direction. i need a goal. a purpose. a duty #yes i risk the perception of the self as a non person and simply a tool with a use #but i already see myself as a thing with no value but use. at least with direction id have a purpose #on the other hand. i fear it. because i dont want to lose the intensity. i dont want to #i dont want to be even keeled and calm. i dont want to give up my anxiety and sadness if it means also losing the highs of joy and elation #is the dramatic swing of moods healthy? perhaps not. but how else am i to experience the breadth and depth of human emotion. of the soul?#i understand the poets. the romantics. i lack their skill. but i understand the heart of it.#the most important thing there is. maybe.

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yes-asil · 6 months

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Soul Melter Mode held it’s promise

#kirby #kirby star allies #asil and art #the new lore unlocked all my backup lore so now I'm emotional again

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 10 months

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Lmao Frank would absolutely keep a list of everything they tried to do to fix this situation. He has his work cut out for him with poor wally as well. Does he know what happened to Sally?

Frank does know what happened to Sally! ofc he caught his first glimpse of her when he sorta woke up, then after he Actually woke up, Wally made sure to sit him down and be like "she will kill you if you go near her <3"

still, Frank didn't really believe Wally. so Wally showed him proof:

and Frank quickly changed his tune.

and honestly, it's more like Wally has his work cut out for him with Frank lmao. cause by the time Frank fully wakes, Wally's pretty much given up. and rightfully so, there's... not really anything he can do except protect his sleeping friends.

so Frank's initial attempts to make a plan kinda went like:

Wally is very earnest about saying "that's nice". it is nice. it's refreshing to have someone around that still believes something can be done, however futile that hope is. Frank will catch on eventually.

#these two are very fun to explore in this au because its kind of a role reversal? in a way?#bc after literal decades of being alone in the dark #wally is jaded. hes learned things. hes unlocked a variety of emotions. hes adapted. hes had an all around bad time. hes Different Now.#and frank? frank (at least in the above scribbles) hasnt dealt with that #comparatively hes bright eyed and bushy tailed!!#so hes like drawing up plans and brainstorming #and meanwhile wally is just lounging off to the side with a book hes read about a thousand times #frank: I HAVE A NEW PLAN!#wally: *pats his head* good job neighbor <3 #wally: *goes back to staring into the void*#wh lights out au #scribble salad #welcome home au #within the year tho frank goes from We Can Fix This! to actively talking to a stick with eddie's hat hung on it #and i mean. there is really Nothing they can do. its out of their hands #but perhaps its in someone elses door....#also thank you for the opportunity to Talk about this au! ive been marinating it in the braintisserie a Lot!

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luminarai · 1 month

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I’ve spent all day trying to figure out whether or not to bid on an apartment and with my stress over my job contract coming to an end, finding a new place to live, making a (what feels like) permanent and life altering purchase re apartment, general anxiety & hatred of things changing, decision paralysis, pms hormones, and brand new adhd diagnosis… I’ve been pulling my poor mom and friends on a rollercoaster ride along my entire emotional spectrum today (all of which were panic tinged in addition).

I think I’ve cried like. 18 times today. Not even at anything specific necessarily. I’m just so goddamn overwhelmed. Thank fuck for patient and lovely friends and family.

#cecil blogs her life #new emotion unlocked: every emotion everywhere all at once (now with more anxiety!)

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ra-vio · 9 months

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Kainé, my beloved u_u

#nier #nier replicant #nier gestalt #kainé #kaine #i love her bro u_u i wanna replay so bad but my anxiety is through the roof and I’ve been trying so hard to lower it #ive been countering it by trying to draw #i need to 100% replicant again. i think it would fix me like genuinely #its gotta be on a new account too like with all the achievements not unlocked. ive done it twice already #its terrible. its the best thing on earth. i hate it. why would they do this. im so happy they did this #everyone talks about flower farming being the worst. no. flower farming is easy.#its the material farm that makes you wanna die #its me running the 15 nightmares for hours trying to hit the money achievement #if you wanna eagle egg farm dont do the aerie. do 15 nightmares #i can’t remember which door. i think i had a better time getting damascus steel there too #this is the worst grind in any video game ever but like. if they took this away from me? would actually be inconsolable #sir that is my emotional support material grind that makes me wanna die. please understand

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inutaffy · 1 year

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theo is such a good character because he was DEF bad. like. the hate for him by the pack is warranted. no other villain split them up like that, no one questioned scott as an alpha, or got that close to killing him for good. theo was right, emotional pain is the pain that lasts. and it lasted!!!! they aint forget!!!!!!

#now am i saying he deserved HELL? no #absolutely not. what in the FUCK.#THAT WAS TERRIFYING #new fear UNLOCKED #anyways. its pretty obvious for all the mistakes he made it was done out of his emotions #deucalion called him weak and he killed josh #like his calculated logical moves are when he's fine. dread doctors called him a failure and he killed tracy like #he was being manipulated or used most of season 5 either by the doctors or by deucalion #theo raeken #teen wolf #scotts pack has been a constant until season 5 really. thats how he's gotten through it all

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paarthursass · 2 years

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i do love assassin’s creed 3 but GOSH i wish it didn’t rob us of some story points...

like i know we see connor reading haytham’s journal at the beginning, but i wish we’d gotten MORE of a reaction out of him when he realized the head Templar was his father.

Likewise I know Haytham was able to put things together and figure out Connor was his son before they properly speak for the first time, but like...I wish we’d seen that realization. I wish we’d seen how Haytham initially reacted to that. How Haytham’s goonies reacted.

They give us this juicy juicy central conflict of Connor fighting against his own father and then they don’t...give us these moments. And it’s frustrating because i LOVE Connor. He’s one of my favorite assassins. But he’s got this Shakespearean level conflict going on and the game doesn’t dig into it the way it should.

#sophie.txt #assassin's creed #ac3 #connor kenway #full disclosure i still haven't FINISHED the game so it could surprise me with stuff later #currently on the 'connor and haytham are forced to work together' missions #i played the game YEARS ago but on the ps3 and it was bugged so i could never progress the main questline when i needed to go to new york #but gosh i wish wish WISH we had more to work with in this relationship #we spend two fucking hours with haytham in the tutorial stage and for what?#for the game to NOT give us these juicy emotional reveals with him and connor??#it just feels like they put their energy in all the wrong places #yes i do hate those first two hours with haytham bcs of how the game doesn't START until CONNOR IS WITH ACHILLES #u can't craft u can't hunt u can't start unlocking things until u get to sequence 6 and the game is halfway over #if you're going to spend the first two hours of the game focusing on story over gameplay mechanics then frickin commit to the story!!!#i do love this game and i do love connor i just hate to see these storytelling opportunities go to waste

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clusterblood · 10 days

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I think this might be first time in my life when I was sad to leave.

it hurts.

how do people do this? is that what everyone has been feeling all along?

#todays chronicles of me unlocking new unknown emotions amd fucking hating it #genuine human connection. but at what cost #actually aspd #actually bpd #actually npd #npd #npd safe #bpd safe #bpd #aspd safe #aspd #actually cluster b #tags give me attention at these trying times of experiencing whatever the fuck this emotion is #apathy maybe you have a point after all

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angiestown · 18 days

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guess who's playing new horizons againnn

#I was going to reset my second town since all I really had done was terraforming and my main player already did a few HHP houses #and the main thing I wanna do is start HHP from scratch #but I decided to just start a new player instead #and you know what it's kind of nice starting up in a town that already has a neat layout #it's like the old games where you just work with what you've got #even though I'm literally not doing that bc I made the layout #but it was like over 2 years ago that I did that so it feels different #still undecided on if I'll develop the town itself but I might #my main goal here is to get clothes get emotes design every HHP house #but uh don't expect any pics for a while bc I need to go through and 'design' every house to unlock all the furni #and get screenshots of their requests #so I can go back and redesign everything with a full catalogue available #which is what I did with HHD

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euphor1a · 1 year

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to the boyfriend i want so hopelessly but will never have, happy birthday milove ♡

#gyugyu 🐶#hiiii ! yes this is the mandatory ‘it’s my ult bias day’ sappy ass long delulu message from aleyna 💌#so pls proceed with caution bc once i start talking it’ll get ... yeah. anyway #happy mingoo day everyone 🥺🥺#he the loml 💖 (... one of many but let’s not talk about that *cough*)#i just love him so much :((#the giant puppy boy who stole my heart and never gave it back 😭😞#also he’s literally the most boyfriend to ever boyfriend?????? it’s so unfair ☹️#just another day of not having mangyu 😔... what is life #do you know the feeling when you like look at someone and your heart starts swelling in your chest so much that it hurts??#that’s exactly how i feel whenever i look at mingyu 🥺! i appreciate and love every little thing about him so much i :(( can’t explain #he’s soooooo comfort shaped i love him 😞. god. wanna pepper kisses all over his face and tell him how happy he makes me and #how precious he is and how i’d actually commit arson for him 😭#also wanna kith those pretty moles 🥺🤏🏼 nnnnnnnn #why so babie if so huge 😔 he’s literally a giant puppy baby ashtsjjdhk GOD #when he laughs/giggles >>>>>>>>>!! my heart is hurting so BAD i’m so fond of him 😭😭😭#every now and then i find myself going; SIR WHY ARE U DOING THIS ARE U WILLING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY POOR HEART??#like loving him literally unlocked a whole new spectrum of emotions for me idk how to explain this like a sane person #in short this is like. the most fucking delulu i’ve ever been in my life 💀? or at least it feels like it...#😩 just one chance PLS!!! PLS I BEG!!!! :(( i’m so down bad it’s SO BAD #a very brainrot inducing man (the type i always fall for 😔?! started seeing the patterns hhhhh)#the amount of love my little body holds for him is insane 😷 (little in comparison to him btw... i’m generic female height 👾)#loving mingoo feels like a rainy night where you’re cuddling with your loved one under a blankie; about to fall asleep bc of how cozy u are #i wish words were enough to express how i feel about this man... but it really isn’t 😕!#he just means a lot to me okay?#he’s everything and beyond 💓 i love him like my whole life depends on it (although i’m like that for several people)#not my fault that my heart is so fucking big and it has separate places to store everyone i adore 💖#happy bday babylove 🥺 i hope your day is filled with the happiest of moments and you can celebrate properly 💕#it’s so sad that you’ll never know how much you mean to this random girl on the other side of the world :/#i’m so done for aren’t i? took like 40 minutes to type and everything... sigh. i love him so bad </3

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icehot13 · 1 year

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here to report that sexism is still alive and well on the jobsite despite the groundbreaking “men/women at work” sign out front!!!!

#my new foreman is incapable of addressing me?????#i asked him a question and he walks over to SOMEONE WHO ISN'T EVEN WORKING WITH US #AND DISCUSSES IT WITH HIM IN FRONT OF ME #WITHOUT EVER LOOKING AT ME?????#AND THEN WALKS AWAY #poor dude on the ladder is like 'uuuuuh... i can.... walk you through it?'#no ben if he wants me to do it he's gonna have to speak to me like at all #dude showing the other two journeymen the wiring and prints WITHOUT ME #LIKE????#the first thing they did was COME ASK ME FOR HELP BRO #what the fuck???? what the fuck??????#i cannot adequately explain how it feels to ask a question #and then have him walk over and speak to someone unrelated about it #why are you asking ben how it fits???? i am the one???? who saw this problem????????#i am the one installing hte boxes???????#you unlock a new emotion: rage confusion

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jtbb · 1 year

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literally sound like a broken record but god i miss summer

#hello new mutuals . witness my yearly insnae weather opinions #its finally spring which is Good but its still like 50 degrees and cloudy every day theres not any tangible difference yet #its so infuriatingly close yet far . like only one or two months until it starts warming up but i literally cannot stand the wait #please just give me 70 degrees for one day . thats all i beg of u . literally bare minimum i need to feel alive #this post brought to u by: my pants were in the wash so i put on some cargo shorts i havent worn in 6 months and unlocked hidden emotions #i need . car stereo on full blast ice cream sandwiches loose tshirts fresh fruit stand watermelon hot wind on my face #hay bale archery . downtown boba . sleeping shirtless window open power out . golden hills . cargo shorts !!!#chugging three bottles of ice cold water to avoid heat exhaustion . etc #normal abt this season

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creetchre · 9 months

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forever chasing the emotional high of watching delta’s reveal in ztd for the first time

#zero escape #ztd #zero time dilemma #greatest plot twist of all time imo #that shit unlocked new emotions

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roughentumble · 10 months

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spn s5 had such a perfdct finale like im glad it didnt just call sam a blood freak over and over and then end with him in the deepest darkest pit forever im glad the show went on for fuckteenth seasons and then he got to go to heaven and know peace when he was done ans all that but literally s5 had such a good fucking endinggggggggg its ok dean ive got him. words that will rattle around in my skull until my dying day

#its ok dean ive got him unlocked new emotions for me #dean beaten to a bloody pulp kneeling on the ground defeated head bowed because it was all for naught #all thwir arguments and their best laid efforts and their friends who sacrificed their lives and the people he threatened #none of it matters because the world is saved and his brother is dead. sam was never getting out of this alive.#clawing at the walls biting everyone. his home has never been so empty. the AC still rattles #but no one will ever sit in the passenger seat again and know why that is. no one will ever sit in the passenger seat.#and no matter how happy he manages to be there will always be the tickle in the back of his mind #because sam's never getting out. and death will not reunite them. and sam will never know happiness again. eternal suffering.

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unfortunately-rogi · 2 years

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Gracie in the morning

(Oil on canvas)

#I just watched that doctor who episode with Van Gogh #and Loving Vincent in one sitting #so I unlocked a new emotion!#and just wanted to post my oil painting final #idk I guess I can see all the flaws with it and the reasons why I don’t like it but I just sobbed for like an hour straight #over the thought Vincent Van Gogh seeing how his work touched others #so I’m posting my actual art here too and not just my funny little cartoons #I promise I’ll keep drawing azula and the gang I just have been busy with this #and other art assignments #oil painting #oil paint #oil on canvas #chiaroscuro #oil portrait #portrait painting #traditional art #traditional artist #dramatic painting #impressionism

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toelessbastard · 9 months

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banging hands on table I want to see cute CXS ARTTTTTTT BUT ITS ALL S2 SPOILERS

#CXS I WANT U TO KISS. me ON THE FACE #new boy crush unlocked hope he doesnt die!! hahaha. stares directly at his pv. hahahahaa #im devestated.#yall . earthquake ep is ranging throught my brain rn. i wasnt expecting it.#je feels so MUCH all the TIME if u squeeze him his EMOTIONS LEAK OUT HIS EYES #AND THE M O M

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