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here2bbtstrash · 2 years

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LDOMLT 7 :

 ahhh you painted JK's picture so perfectly. Black outfit, chains and chunky shoes is so him !!!

 “You weren’t kidding about his ass!” nope, we do not joke about Park Jimin's ass in this house !!!!

 can i just say how comfortably mundane this sideline stories are, like nothing much just reader going about her day and mention of the devil here and there directly and indirectly.

 “Wonho would love a third. He can barely keep up with me. why does this feel so normal, like there is no other way i could have imagined Jimin to be in.

lol her struggle is so comical really and what a journey has she embarked upon from jerking off to yoongi's memory to almost submitting herself in studio, from screaming wrong person's name after begging them to fuck her in a very specific manner to seeing Yoongi everywhere quite litreally. poor woman has it bad and the devil is to blame. aahhhhhhhhhhh

@reader and i'm sorry but not only you are emotionally dense, you are also a poor observant as to how little baby goth really looks at you, which is both apparent to the guy you are hate fucking and your best friend who has only seen him for the first time !!!

and i wonder what was she hoping for really with which speed she just fled from her seat at the bar to see Yoongi! oh god stop following him, what are you even going to say ?? let's check out the bathroom at this bar ????? i want to boop and see if you are real or a figment of my imagination!!!!! GET A GRIP WOMAN !!!!

You don’t hear from Jimin after Jungkook drops you off that night, and you’re too stubborn to text first, secretly hoping he’ll make the first move and apologize for reading you for filth unprovoked. YOU EXASPRATE ME CHILD, REALLY

overworking herself to avoid thinking about things at hand or to face the consequences of what happened, i feel you !

Presentation room.

Better than his damn office, you think to yourself, and then two more texts pop up. are you sure woman ??are you ???

“Now, Yoongi,” you snap.

At this, his head snaps up. “Well, some of us got tapped to give a fucking presentation to the visiting overseas team. Tomorrow!” ssshhhhh deep breathes!!!! at least they are talking, this is still better than just running away ......

not gonna lie watching yoongi fumble at at least somethings is very very satisfying....

but his only response is the jerk of his adam’s apple in a hard swallow. heloo???? presentation ?????

“Finish the presentation,” whoa whoa nice to meet you miss ocassionaly-soft-dom-especially-when-you-want-yoongi-to-control

“We don’t have time, Yoongi.” Your hands fist in his shirt to pull him closer, and he steps in between your spread legs. “Just fuck me.” and there we have LDMOLT reader going down in the history as the woman who denied MIN YOONGI'S MOTHERFUCKING TONGUE !!!!!

i cannot believe that so far they are fucking like animals with only their genitals connected that mere thought of holding each other during sex sounds so reckless to her brain......

“Come.” His lips brush against yours when he says it, a touch so light it could’ve been an accident. FIST ON THE TABLE FIST in THE MOUTH SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT MY FAV MOMENT IN THE CHEP!!!!! oh god but you really love to edge huh!!!!!!!!!!!

whoa whoa what a turn that took in the end with finally them behaving like humans !!guess more fluff is coming (?)

i'm off to read new chep now bye *sob sob*

hfeiushfkdjfgklj the fact that you took the time to put this all together in prep for the latest drop is so sweet 🥺 ohhhhh chapter 7!!!!! 🫠

jk is fully in his JITB album release party outfit and i refuse to apologize 🥲 gahhhh.... baby goth 😩🖤

LMFAO NOT MENTIONS OF THE DEVIL.... you know.... just your very normal coworker that you are hatefucking and also he's min yoongi..... NORMAL THINGS.......

thank u for acknowledging that reader has GONE THRU IT 👏 my girl has not had a BREAK. not a moment of PEACE. it's a wonder she's still sane at all 🤣

hoooooo boy her obliviousness...... chapter 8 is sure gonna be fun huh 🤭

AHAHAHA NOT LET'S CHECK OUT THE BATHROOM. NOT A BOOP ON THE NOSE OMFG. thank god yoongi was a trackstar bc what the fuck WOULD she have done if she caught him hefudfjkgsdfhfdg girly did not THINK she just RAN!!!!! 🏃‍♀️

hehehehehe they share the soft dom and it's beautiful 🥲

SHE'S A FOOL !!! SHE'S A FOOL !!!!! SHE WILL COME TO REALIZE SOON ENOUGH THAT SHE'S A DAMN FOOL 😩

not the fucking like animals hfgdhkjlfsldgdg the half-kisssssss 💀 you know i couldn't just let y'all have it. absolutely not!!!! you must SUFFERRRRRR 🫠

if you had this much to say for chapter 7 i..... god rest your soul when you read chapter 8 🙏 will say nice things abt you at your funeral 🤣 nahhhh but thank you so much for reading and for the lovely feedback, i can't overstate how much it means 🥺💜 this story is my baby and i will always love screaming with y'all about these idiots!!!!

#anonymous #mbox 📮#fic review #look down on me like that #LDOMLT spoilers #queue what you want ㄱ -ㅅ-ㄱ

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trickster-whim · 2 years

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So, my sister and I had kind of an amazing trip to Goodwill!!

(Kind of long, so I'm gonna put it under a readmore. Also nothing at all explicit, but slightly adult for doujinshi and body pillow covers)

I'm going to go out of order but in the order I took pictures, so first up are these two Dungeon Tiles Master Set boxes! They're really cool, especially since we've been playing dungeons and dragons more lately. Also there were some people's printouts of dnd books, which is adorable. The only thing is that the sets were kinda mixed up, and they were the most expensive single items we got ($6.49, I think?), so we left one behind at the store and who knows what was in that one??

But I definitely want to try to use these sometime, and the boxes themselves are really cute, so ✅

The thing that drew us in and convinced us pretty quickly this was going to be a wild trip, though, was a stack of Japanese novels and doujinshi! This was the same goodwill that I once found a gay space furry retelling of Beauty and the Beast (which turned out to be v good, btw), so there's precedent for some choice smut, but I've never found doujinshi before!

Mostly it's things I'm not super familiar with, and it all appears to be in Japanese, so we can't completely read it (although my sister's kinda learning it in her free time), but it's still awesome.

The non-comic books were these three Gankutsuou novels. Of course I've never seen it, but I did read Count of Monte Cristo in high school! (I remember reading it during my welding class lmao. And I had the teacher who tested us when we got to school over minutia that wasn't in the abridged versions, so yes I read the whole book.)

Can't read it, still cool.

The doujinshi/fanbooks I'm having a harder time finding info about, despite the fact that most of them list an author/illustrator and date. Again, they're in Japanese, but these have (more) pictures 😎. And they're quite nice pictures too lmao.

Three of the books are fanbooks from Magi (I'm not sure if that's Magi the Labyrinth of Magic, but I've been reading that, so I guess I'll see within ~300 chapters), two are from Tiger and Bunny (which I wanted to watch but just haven't gotten around to it), and one from Heat Guy J (which I've never heard of, but it looks kind of great, but it's not available for streaming right now).

Again, I haven't seen any of the anime these are from, and they're in Japanese, so I've been using an online translator to translate (and the pictures help ngl), but I fucking love them. Some aren't 100% my style (I was literally talking the day before about how many fetish-y amputee mods there are for Fallout, and one book is about a character with amputated limbs in a way I'm not sure isn't fetish-y, but it's not, like, offensive I don't think), but I'm a big fan of smut idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (Also! I forgot to add that the art is very good. I'm going to keep looking up the artists to see if they've done anything else I might also like :p )

(I do have to say: these books are mostly censored [that is, no explicit shots of genitals without censor bars], but they are very adult, and they were just sitting out there for anyone to stumble on. Like when I found a Torchwood book in the kids section of Bookmans. Idk.)

Anyway! The next stuff is not smutty (sadly): Daisuki Magazine!

I hadn't heard of this magazine, but it's a mid-2000s German-language manga mag, so almost exactly a one-to-one match for my interests lol. My German is rusty, and some of the words are specific, so it's slow going reading it, but look! Fruits Basket! Which we called Frubba when we were kids because we had a million inside jokes!

(I also went back later and got Juni 2007. Also heatstroke because it is hot as all hell here.)

And lastly was another impulse purchase but also amazing: a Nightwing body pillow cover by soltian!!

Sorry for the terrible shot lmao. I wanted to put it on my pillowcase-less pillow immediately, so I had to wash it quickly.

I love this art (༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ)

I don't follow comics, but I read almost every DC (especially Batman) comic in our city's library system when I was in high school, so yeah. Also I really do like the art; it's very cute.

(Side note, all of soltion's art is cute. They have charms, and the digidestined are absolutely perfect and I love them. They also have the pillowcases in stock right now so, you know, support the artists! I'm really eyeing those keychains honestly!)

A better(?) picture of the pillowcase which also shows off the last thing I got while we were out: new bedclothes!

We stopped at Walmart because my mom had a gift card, and they had a nine-piece sheets and stuff set for $9, and I've been looking for a new blanket and pillowcases, so score! It was full size, and my bed's a twin, so it's very large, but who cares? I get almost all my bedclothes at goodwill, so I'm pleased :p

Anyway back to the goodwill trip. It was expensive, ha. Everything we got cost between $2 and $7, which is amazing but adds up, and I am so, so grateful that goodwill has a 20% off $20+ coupon and also that my sister who has a job bought this lot UwU

So it cost about $37 for a stack of doujinshi, manga mags, light novels, dnd tile sets, and a body pillow cover. So, um. Yeah. My sister and I were freaking out lmao. I don't know if we'll find such a good haul again, but I'm super happy with all this. Now I just need to make room on my packed shelves.

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thegeminisage · 3 years

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my secret galaxy brain reading of spn s11 is better than yours

or: why season 11 is good actually. this is a long-ass meta, so it's going behind the cut

some disclaimers before we get going

absolutely all of this is accidental. nobody does this shit on purpose. this is ~my interpretation~ or whatever. i'm not actually trying to argue the writers meant to do this lol. what i'm saying is that this is the way to make season 11 make sense in your brain because it makes sense in mine and it's one of my FAVORITES. it could be one of your favorites too if you stop limiting yourself

there is heavy discussion of sexual violence in this meta so read safely etc also spoilers for all of s11 obviously

unless you watched the anime, i've seen more supernatural than you have, so i'm right >:)

for the uninitiated, the basic plot of season 11 is that eons and eons ago, before there was heaven or hell or earth or humans or angels, there was only god (chuck) and the darkness (amara). amara kept destroying what god made, so he and the archangels locked her away in a cage, which removing the mark of cain from dean's arm opened. amara escaped and dean was the first thing she saw, so she spends the season using some kind of thrall over him to make him feel drawn to her and unable to hurt her, and also looking for chuck so she can give him a little payback.

ALRIGHT HERE WE GO

season 11 & sexual violence

you don't need to look very far to find examples of sexualized violence and outright sexual violence on supernatural, but s11 is lousy with it. just to name a few examples:

amara's "thrall" on dean, which we will absolutely get into more later

crowley's jokes about altar boys and the tastes of catholic priests

ALLLLL the pedophile jokes made when crowley was raising baby amara

angels torturing cas and threatening to cut his genitals off, only to send in hannah (an angel who formerly had unrequited romantic/sexual feelings for him) to play good cop(/honeypot??) in hopes of making him talk

the return of lucifer, who possessed sam (spn has a history of equating possession and sexual violence) and is heavily implied to have raped sam in hell, and the MULTIPLE times he menaces sam throughout this season, including forcibly touching his soul

lucifer possessing castiel and using him to enact violence on the winchesters, his loved ones

i absolutely REFUSE to acknowledge the lucifer/crowley stuff but if you know you know

the episode with the kissing curse, using "love" as a means to deliver death

dean's possession in the soul eater episode

the "chitters" monsters involving mating, orgies, and forcible impregnation

you get the idea

i could write a whole essay on almost all of these but for this post we'll be sticking mostly to dean & amara

@marcusantonius pointed out while we were watching season 11 that what amara does to dean is basically speedrun his two major attachments - sam and castiel. she starts out as a baby, someone in need of protection, and quickly grows into an adult who attempts to romance/seduce him. the feelings dean has around amara aren't feelings FOR HER, they're feelings he has for SAM AND CAS that are being TRANSFERRED onto her through means of her power. (this is important for later.)

what amara does to dean is sexualized violence bordering on outright sexual assault. compelling him to feel drawn towards her and to protect her, frequently getting in his personal space and touching his face, and even kissing more than once when he is quite literally unable to resist (it's stated many times that he is unable to kill or even harm her, so he is completely helpless in the presence of someone who makes no secret of her intentions for him, sexual or otherwise).

dean says many times that what he feels for amara is not love or desire or attraction. he can't put a name to it at all - not once in the entire series is he able to properly define this thrall she has over him, which leaves us the audience a little confused (amara asking "what IS happening between us?" in 11.06 as a teenager making sexual advances on a grown man does give me a good laugh, because it was written SO WEIRDLY)... BUT we know that it is definitely sexual in nature, and not at all something dean wants to be happening.

this is addressed kind of strangely in 11.13. the villain of the week is a witch moonlighting as a hairdresser, who puts a kissing curse on her clients. the curse must be passed along like a hot potato - if you kiss someone else, it's passed along to them. if they kiss someone else, it's passed along to them. but eventually, a monster called a qareen will show up in the form of "your deepest desire" and kill you, and work its way backwards to the original curse-ee. in the episode, dean kisses the vic (i'll point out this was also technically done w/o her consent, though it was a very businesslike kiss) to put the curse on himself and protect her. the qareen takes the form of amara, and she gives Dean this little speech:

Qareen!Amara: You're a mystery. I can see inside your heart. Feel the love you feel. Except it's cloaked in shame. When it comes to this, you can’t help yourself, so why fight it? Just give in.

then, at the end of the episode, after dean reveals who the qareen was for him, we get this conversation between sam and dean:

Dean: You seriously think the sister of God is my deepest darkest desire? Sam: She isn't? Dean: No! She can’t be! Sam: Why not? Dean: Why? Because if she is that means that I'm… Sam: Means you're what? Complicit? Weak? Evil? Dean: For starters, yeah. Sam: Dean. Do you honestly think you ever had a choice in the matter? She's the sister of God, and for some reason she picked you and that sucks, but if you think I’m gonna blame you or judge you…I'm not.

the "shame" part of both of these is really what stuck out to me - the word itself isn't in the second passage, but dean's vibes are absolutely filled with shame. to me, this always read as being shame about the sexual violence and about the complicity/weakness that "allowed" that violence to happen.

and as a reminder, sam is just a few episodes past the confrontation with his own rapist (he returns to the cage to speak with lucifer in 11.09 & 11.10, and canonically struggles with what happened there even after the confrontation ends). sam made a point earlier in this episode of making sure the victim of the curse knew it wasn't her fault her husband died, but the fault of the witch who cast the curse. sam is VERY emotionally intelligent, and i honestly believe that he was speaking as one survivor of sexual violence to another here. what he's telling dean is something victims often need to be reminded of: it's not your fault. you weren't complicit, or weak. you didn't have a choice. you don't deserve blame or judgment.

we've had bad guys make sexual threats at both dean and sam many times before this and a few more times after, but as far as i can recall, this is the only conversation in the entire series that even attempts to address the impact of that particular kind of violence on dean. it's short, and strangely written, but nonetheless: there it is.

season 11 & the dean in the closet

for the purposes of this post, i'm not going to go through the entire series and find examples to try and prove dean is bi and has feelings for cas. if you don't believe that then what are you doing here? we're skipping to the goods.

actually, i always got annoyed at people who read the fake-amara's speech in 11.13 (or any of the other times people spoke about dean's shame regarding amara) as being about dean's sexuality, because in my mind it was ABSOLUTELY about his being a victim of sexual violence, which was far more important to me, as it is discussed far less often.

BUT, knowing what we know now (that cas was always canonically in love with dean, and it's all but canon that dean really was bisexual), i'm willing to entertain another notion:

Sam: ...you're what? Complicit? Weak? Evil? Dean: For starters, yeah.

the "evil" bit never really sat right with me as part of the narrative of sexual violence, aside from touching on dean's general self-loathing, but it fits the narrative of being closeted MUCH better. dean, a self-hating homophobic bisexual, would probably use a similar word, if not something heavy as "evil," to describe the way he feels about other men. it's a malevolent feeling. (if you're like me and ascribe to the jackles headcanon that dean resorted to turning tricks to make food money when he was underage, we could also consider the extremely fucked up fact that almost every queer man dean's ever met is someone who hurt him.)

dean is ashamed of who and what he is, and the way he feels about cas. living like that, that's violence. he lives violently day in and day out with that feeling. (and amara knows it. it's worth nothing that she uses cas to communicate with dean MULTIPLE times in this season, both by carving messages on his body and psychically, through his own connection to dean - and when dean "betrays" her to rescue casifer, she's horrified at whatever she sees in his head.)

equating sexual violence to the violence of being closeted

but what's amazing about this weird badly-written little 11.13 conversation (and indeed, the season-long plotline of dean and his shame) is that we don't HAVE to assign it to the purposes of being about sexual violence OR about being closeted. it can be and IS both.

my favorite reading of this is that BEING IN THE CLOSET IS INHERENTLY A VIOLENT AND TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE. many of the same feelings are involved: shame, guilt, self-loathing. sam's comforting words to dean - that he will not be blamed or judged - are equally applicable in both cases. dean is a victim of sexual violence, and he is also in the closet, and both of these experiences are traumatic ones, and they are intermingled with each other in a big way (again, if you're into dean-turned-tricks headcanon, they are intermingled INSEPERABLY - the sexual violence being one of the direct causes of dean not wanting to accept or address his own sexuality).

the bait-and-switch

the real galaxy brain moment of this whole thing begins at the end of 11.22 (an otherwise lackluster episode that played sam's lucifer trauma for laughs how dare they ugh god whatever that's off-topic but i HATE IT) when amara and chuck finally have the confrontation she's been fighting all season for. she is attacked by witches, demons, angels, and then stabbed by lucifer himself, before she's finally on her knees before chuck, and then we get this little exchange:

Chuck: I'm sorry. For this, for everything. Amara: An apology at last. What's sorry to me? I spent millions of years crammed into that cage alone and afraid...

maybe you already know where i'm going with this. a cage isn't so different from a closet when we're working with metaphors, right?

amara talks about her grievances with chuck many times throughout season 11 - that he was spoiled, that he created the earth to stroke his ego, that he couldn't handle her as she was. and once he finally makes his appearance he tells it his own way - that he had no choice but to lock amara away, that she couldn't stand the things and people he made, that he did it to protect people. but something about THIS conversation in particular - even though it's not written into the dialogue - gives me a particular kind of vibe.

there is something innately, unspeakably WRONG with amara. i don't mean unspeakable as in very bad, i mean unspeakable as in LITERALLY undefinable. it's just like dean being unable to put a name to the pull she has over him. no one talks directly at it or about it, they go in circles around it, but facts are facts: amara simply couldn't be allowed to exist as she was because there was just something innately wrong with her. and it's this conversation in particular, the first one they have together onscreen, that really slams that feeling home for me.

the entire time chuck and amara are talking, the camera repeatedly cuts to dean - he is so visibly upset that the first time i watched this, i was certain he was about to jump into the middle of things and put himself between the two of them. we're meant to believe that dean has trouble hearing this because he "cares" about amara, but i have a different take.

i think it's empathy. real, actual empathy - not the kind of feeling that amara had to force out.

stay with me here. eventually, after chuck tries to lock amara away again, she gets her second wind, attacks him, and leaves him for dead - and as he dies, the sun dies with him, and so too does all life on earth.

in the following episode, the finale, amara finds her way to a park, where she takes in god's creation, visibly upset as she realizes that his flowers die at her touch (again, hammering home the point that there is something innately wrong with her that means she cannot live in this world), and eventually speaks with an old lady feeding the birds.

Woman: Do you want to feed them? Amara: I shouldn't. Woman: I've been feeding these birds going on 20 years now. They're practically family. And I know that makes me sound like a crazy old bat, but...heck. My husband died a couple of years ago, and my son keeps slipping me these brochures for retirement communities - a.k.a. where they send old folks to die, but not to make a fuss about it. Amara: So you hate him. Woman: Well, a little bit. Sometimes. But you know family. Even when you hate them, you still love them.

this speech brings tears to amara's eyes. what's more, she spends this entire section with her hands in her lap. after a season of killing her way through humanity to get god's attention, she is afraid to touch these birds for fear of killing them. she feels empathy for them. she and dean are connected, after all - so as soon as he began to feel true, genuine empathy - so did she.

when dean shows up to kill amara (via a bomb made out of souls hidden in his chest), she immediately clocks his plan. she practically dares him to do it, and - he can't. he is, as always, helpless against her.

what dean does instead is talk to her. more importantly, he listens to her. when she says her brother sent dean here to execute her, he tells her chuck actually didn't want this - that it was actually his very last resort. he asks her if this, the death of everything, is what she wanted, and she tells him all she really wanted was payback. again, dean EMPATHIZES:

Dean: Yeah, that's revenge. It'll get you out of bed in the morning, and when you get it, it feels great... for about five minutes. I've been there. Me and Sam, we have had our fair share of fights—more than our share. But no matter how bad it got, we always made it right because we're family. I need him. He needs me. And when everything goes to crap, that's all you've got—family. Now you might be a—an all-powerful being...but I think you're human where it counts. You simply need your brother.

what's really neat about this section, and the scene before it where amara confronts her brother, is that they mark the first times dean felt any sort of genuine emotion for amara at all - one that she didn't force out of him or one that he felt for someone else that she just took for herself. dean genuinely EMPATHIZES with her - after everything she's done to him and his loved ones, and to the people on earth, dean sees the humanity in her. that's kind of his and sam's M.O., loving monsters into men - the number of non-human adversaries who eventually became allies because of the winchesters’ empathy or liking for them or even just their influence is staggering. cas, gabriel, meg, benny, crowley, rowena, metatron, to name a few off the top of my head - and now amara.

and then we get THIS:

Dean: You don't want to be alone. Not really. I mean, hell. Maybe that's why you wanted me. But deep down, you didn't really want me... 'cause I'm not him.

(emphasis mine)

and here's my galaxy brain take: dean empathizes with amara - TRULY empathizes with her - because they're both queer (or queer-coded).

I KNOW THIS SOUNDS NUTS BUT LISTEN. this weird creepy stalkery hetero "romance" was fake on both sides all along. dean and amara are the same. that unspeakable and innate wrongness lives in both of them. they're self-loathing and furious at god for his failures and callousness, outcasts in a world that isn't for them, a world that has HURT them simply on account of them being what they are. the violence done to amara was done to her BECAUSE of this unspeakable wrongness about her - her queerness, or her queer-codedness - and we already decided this was, for the purposes of this season, functionally the same violating and traumatic experience as sexual violence.

amara's been using dean to try and replace chuck this entire season. it's some weird comphet bullshit tied in with the fact that dean was the first part of chuck's creation she ever saw. it stands to reason then that she was trying to force dean to be with her and love her the way she wanted to force CHUCK to be with her. that's part of why she started life as a baby - as someone he'd protect as he did his own sibling.

so in some weird, warped, very roundabout way, amara was enacting on dean the violence that chuck enacted on her - making him feel the same shame and weakness that chuck made HER feel when he locked her away eons ago. if amara unknowingly replaced chuck with dean, then she also unknowingly took part of her revenge on him. the only way she knew how to love someone was to force them to do it, because the only ways she had ever been loved until now involved violence - until dean and his moment of genuine empathy.

consider this final speech:

Dean: Maybe I can kill you. Or maybe I can't. Maybe if I pull this trigger, we all live happily ever after, or maybe we die bloody, or maybe it doesn't matter, because maybe there's a different way. So I'm gonna ask you again. Put aside the rage. Put aside the hate. And you tell me...what do you want?

dean is the only person in BILLIONS of years to ask her this! one queer to another! and it turns out that and all she wanted - the ONLY thing she needed - was to be understood and accepted by her family. immediately after this, amara summons chuck to their park, and the two of them talk it out in what is genuinely a very moving scene. amara - perhaps because of her connection with dean, perhaps because she's finally admitted to herself that she does still love her brother - sees the beauty in the world now, and feels love for it, and she doesn't want to destroy it anymore.

and at the end, after she's made her peace with god, and the sun has been turned back on, amara says:

Amara: Dean, you gave me what I needed most. I want to do the same for you.

and what do we get at the end of this episode? mary winchester, risen from her grave. dean's family. and - SPOILERS FOR SEASON 12 - though at first mary rejects dean (and sam) as being the same children she remembers from 1983, after a long and rocky road, at the end of the season, they eventually come to a reconciliation where she sees them for who they truly are. it's never ABOUT being queer because this show uses the fucking hays code when it comes to dean's sexuality, but it's still about being queer!!

dean gave amara what she needed - acceptance from her family - and she gave him that back in turn. all it took, the entire time, was one SHRED of empathy from one queer to another. all dean had to do was recognize her - REALLY recognize her - not as a replacement for sam or cas but as who she really was. and he saw himself in her, and the empathy that followed was genuine because it was the most natural thing in the world. in the end neither dean nor amara needed the "romance" they thought they did/were forced to want. they never did. they only needed acceptance and understanding.

supernatural is always about family and the power of love, and this season is no exception.

other great parts of season 11

if you're still not convinced, season 11 is full of other things that make it amazing:

GOD'S RETURN. after SIX YEARS he's back, this is canon, we finally get to hear what he has to say. they did more with him in a handful of episodes in this season than all of season 15

also, something else returns after six years. i'll give you a hint: it glows hot in god's presence. it was last seen being dropped into a motel trash can.

and of course the big one: lucifer and sam. what great callbacks to seasons 4-6 when lucifer and what he did to sam in hell was actually scary and mattered a lot! lucifer returns to being scary in this and i can't get enough of it.

this is also inseparable from sam's arc involving his faith - he begins praying again, having visions again, and is GUTTED when those prayers and visions lead him back to the place of his worst trauma. he gets to MEET GOD this season. it's fucking insane

the inherent melodrama of castiel, someone loved and trusted by the winchesters, being possessed by someone who they hate and who has hurt them. you get all of the sam drama with him accidentally trusting lucifer with his soul and his brother's life, and all the dean drama where he watches the devil run around in his boyfriend. also, misha collins does an uncanny impression of mark pellegrino. it's actually really creepy

somehow, they managed to make metatron, a deeply hated villain by all, ACTUALLY LIKEABLE. for TWO whole episodes. it was NUTS

this season starts off rowena's long arc with lucifer and her lucifer trauma that eventually becomes the catalyst of her bonding so profoundly with sam <3 best friends forever <333

sam and dean bond with a pair of canonically gay hunters who DON'T DIE

billie is introduced in this season and she's super hot and cool and awesome

eileen is also introduced in this season. her arc mirrors sam's so well, it's SO good. i never though i'd care about sam and a girl who wasn't jess, but i care about them SO MUCH it makes me insane. if you don't love eileen you're wrong!

anyway, watch season 11. it's weird but it's really fucking good. THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK

[spn masterpost]

#supernatural #dean winchester #amara #supernatural meta #destiel #in a roundabout way #i needed a 5th tracked tag lol #i stayed up ALL NIGHT writing this but im gonna be a smartie and schedule it to go up at noon when ppl are awake #liz watches spn #liz's meta #liz's spn stuff #liz makes stuff #long post #just in case the cut fails #this meta really is 3800 words long lol #as a bonus it was implied in late season 10 that amara is the older sibling #even though they retconned it and made them twins later #like amara and dean are both eldest sisters.......

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yikesharringrove · 4 years

Note

Hi!! I was just curious about Nancy and Jonathan’s relationship in your mango series! I was wondering if Nancy was an alpha? If she is, does that mean that Jonathan is a Beta or an Omega? Kids??? I have so many questions and am way too invested in this tiny part of this universe lol Please feel free to make this into a part with Steve and Billy talking to them about pups and bonding if you would like.

Masterlist

Part 29

I realized I literally haven’t mentioned the Wheelers this entire time rip to them I guess

Also I’m using this part as background to everything esp how Billy and Steve got together. Also no monster au I guess? tbh this part just made me realize NONE of this series is thought out

I literally never established a timeline, so I’ve decided it makes more sense for Billy to come to Hawkins earlier. You’ll see lmao. (this started as a little nonsense thing so the timeline of the whole Mango series is so whack pls no one try and do the math)

+I had traumatic emergency surgery on my uterus several years ago, so I’ve based all of Steve’s stuff on that

Steve dated Nancy Wheeler for about a month.

He was always drawn to fiery alphas, liked when they had sharp tongues, weren’t afraid to speak their mind. He liked ‘em smart.

Nancy seemed perfect to him, but Nancy didn’t like how much work omegas were. They needed constant reassurance of love, so much touching and cuddling, and that’s just not how she operates.

They had been casually dating for about a month early in her sophomore year when he asked her to spend his heat with him. She knew that meant he was serious about her, and let him down as gently as she could.

He didn’t take it too hard, and even invited her to a party he was throwing at his big empty house.

That was the first night she really talked to Jonathan Byers.

Their families had always been close, and they had been uncomfortable acquaintances for a long time, but she found him making a pip out of an apple, sat in the kitchen with him and got stoned for the very first time.

They were sitting close to one another, leaning closer, about to kiss when there was a splash outside, there was screaming.

They rushed out to see Steve Harrington, wet and shaking in the cold November night air, doing CPR on, on Barb.

He yelled at Tommy H., told him to call an ambulance.

Barb looked bad. Her lips were tinged blue, her skin pale.

She sank down next to her. Jonathan gently touching her back.

Most of the kids ran when they heard authorities were coming.

She held Barb’s freezing hand until the paramedics arrived.

Steve hadn’t stopped doing CPR the entire time had heard Barb’s ribs crack and splinter from the force.

The paramedics called it.

Steve was never really the same after that. He had become more withdrawn, had quit the swim team and stopped throwing big parties, he started babysitting Dustin Henderson, ended up babysitting most of the party soon enough.

He was still nice to Nancy, would ask her and Jonathan to hang out sometimes. She always thought he was sweet that he was a big heart. Hell, she sat there while he did CPR on her best friend for twenty minutes, but it was easier with Jon. As a beta, she didn’t have to be someone she wasn’t just to keep him from emotional breakdown.

But then Billy Hargrove rolled into town in the beginning of the summer, was all California golden, a big imposing alpha, and she began seeing less and less of Steve.

She thought it was just a summer fling, Billy didn’t seem like the type to stick around for very long, didn’t seem like the monogamous type.

Steve had a bad habit of trusting alphas too quickly, had been with alphas that just wanted to be able to say they’d fucked a male omega.

They were so uncommon, and usually these alphas were just curious, knew male omegas were the only presentation identifiable at birth due to their genitals, had wanted to see for themselves.

But Billy stuck around, starting hanging around Steve wherever he was, joining him when he spent time with the party, or with Jonathan and Nancy.

Billy was starting to grow on her more, as she watched and realized he loved Steve, that he wanted to be as clingy as Steve needed.

They would go on double dates sometimes, and Billy would pull Steve to sit on his lap just as often as Steve would plop himself on Billy’s lap. So she guesses they’re kind of a match made in heaven.

And then Steve got pregnant.

And she expected Billy to run for the hills, but he didn’t. Got kicked out of his house for Steve, changed his whole world for Steve and their pup, and at this point, they were four years in, had two happy pups and we in the process of moving into their first house.

She and Jon hadn’t even talked marriage yet, let alone bonding, were focusing on getting through school.

They had both gone to New York without even consulting one another, decided they didn’t want each other’s college choices to affect the other, that they should pick the best school for themselves.

When they revealed to one another, Jon showed her his acceptance to NYU, his dream school, while Nancy had handed him her Columbia letter.

She got regular updates from Steve, letters stuffed full with photographs and weekly reports. She contacted a bakery local to him to send him a cake when he called and excitedly told her that he had finally gotten his GED, had dropped out of high school in the February of his senior year when he got kicked out of his house, when he was the talk of the whole damn town.

“Letter from Steve.” Jonathan placed the rest of the mail on the counter, ripping open the envelope. “He put in updated pictures of the girls, look.” Nancy cooed over the photos. There was a gorgeous one of all four of them at the beach, Steve had infant Zara strapped to his chest, Billy was holding Mina. It was so cute. “He said they finished painting the house and should be moving in this week.”

“He mention how he was doing?”

“Of course not, have you met him? The only reason we actually knew he almost fucking died was because Billy called us.”

“I guess you’re right.” She was still flipping through photos. “Oh look at this one!” It was Steve caught mid laugh while Mina was doing him hair behind him. “We should go out to California soon to see them. Especially once they’re in their house.

“I’m gonna write Steve back, maybe we could go for New Year’s, or something.” She smiled up at him, stretching on her toes to kiss his jaw.

“I think that sounds nice.”

Mina was currently in the process of showing Jonathan every single toy she owned.

His lap was full of plastic food, blocks, dolls, stuffed animals, books, everything. She was talking excitedly about her little toy Camaro, the one that looked just like Daddy’s!

Nancy was just laughing as Jonathan nodded along patiently. He talked to her like she was an adult, asking her details about each toy in a very serious voice.

Steve slowly set himself on the couch. His abdomen still sore from surgery a few months ago. He was holding Zara, all dressed up in a little onesie that looked hand-knitted.

“How are you doing?” Steve rolled his eyes. Jon and Nancy kept asking.

“Nance, I’m fine. Just sore is all.” He kept dodging her real questions. She knew that the doctor had told Steve there was a chance he wouldn’t be able to be pregnant again, knew it was probably weighing on him. She just looked back and Jon.

“How is Mina doing with Zara? I remember when Mike was born I wanted nothing to do with him.” Steve laughed, bouncing Zara a little.

“She loves her. I swear if she could get me and Billy outta the picture, she would rather raise Zara on her own.” Zara gave a little choked off wail. “Sweet Pea, you are fine.” He put her on his chest, patting her back. “How’s school and everything?”

“It’s good! Jon’s going to end up graduating a semester early, so he’ll be finished by this time next year.”

“Oh, wow. Good for him!”

“I hear you left work, how’s that going?” Steve shrugged.

“They could only offer me one month of leave, and with the surgery and everything, I needed much longer. But you know I don’t mind staying home with these two. I mean, Mina’s in full day preschool now, just Monday to Thursday, but Zara is pretty fussy, so it’s okay. Once she’s not breastfeeding anymore, I’ll probably find a new job.”

“And Billy’s school is going okay?”

“Oh you know him, just overachieving at every stage. He had to cut back on his hours at the garage, he got a really nice internship at a law firm in town, and he’s actually getting paid for it.” Billy had been studying pre-law at UCSD, wanted to go into some kind of prosecution, possibly specialize in domestic cases. His internship was more personal assistant work to one of the partners of the firm, but it was better money than the garage, and something to beef up his resume a bit more.

Steve could hear the garage door beginning to rumble and whine as it slid up.

“Speak of the devil.” He smiled at Billy as he came in, kicking off his shoes. Mina sprinted up to him, wrapping her arms around his waist, standing on his feet as he walked over to everyone.

“You talkin’ ‘bout me, Pretty Boy?” He picked up Mina so he could perch on the armrest next to Steve, giving him a kiss.

“All good things. Kind of.” Nancy doesn’t think she’s ever seen Billy Hargrove in a suit. He loosened his tie, had take off his jacket to place into the coats closet, was currently rolling up his crisp sleeves. She could see edges of a few tattoos. She knew he and Steve had each gotten each others initials on their shoulder blades, adding the pups initials underneath them both. Apparently Billy was beginning to work on sleeves. “How was work?”

“Eh. Same old.” He shrugged, putting Mina down to go back to “playing” with Jonathan. He lifted Zara from Steve. “How are you doin’, Nancy? How’s the Big Apple?”

She waved a hand non-noncommittally. “Oh, it’s good. Jon’s working for some underground paper, shooting for punk shows.” Billy grinned.

“Well done, Byers. I’m sure your kid brother’s plenty jealous.” Jonathan laughed.

“He’s come up for a few of the shows he’s really wanted to see. Which is to say most of them.” The timer went off from the kitchen. Steve went to stand, only to have Billy push him back down, handing Zara back to him.

“Sit tight, Pretty Boy. I got it.” Steve rolled his eyes, but smiled softly at Billy all the same.

“He was a nightmare when we were moving in, wouldn’t let me lift anything over ten pounds.”

After dinner, Steve and Billy tag teamed putting the girls to bed.

It was kind of amazing to watch. Billy got Mina dressed for bed as Steve fed Zara, then they swapped, Steve made sure Mina brushed her teeth while Billy changed Zara, swapping again so that Billy could read a book to Mina and Steve rocked Zara to sleep.

They were so practiced and efficient, both girls were asleep with half an hour.

“You get a lot of practice with the bedtime thing. I mean, it’s every night.” They were sitting on the back porch, on patio furniture that had apparently been a gift from Claudia Henderson.

It was a perfect night, the Southern California air was just chilly enough to warrant a sweater, but perfect for just being in.

“There’s a park a few blocks that way that’s doing fireworks, we should be able to see them from here.” Steve had poured them each some champagne. Steve and Billy were sitting one the chairs across the little coffee table between them.

They chattered through as the clock ticked down, getting closer and closer to 1989.

Ten seconds to midnight, Billy helped Steve stand up. Five seconds to midnight, Jonathan was digging in his pocket.

The fireworks began as Steve pressed his lips to Billy’s. Nancy turned to do the same, choking on a gasp as she saw Jon down on one knee. Steve shrieked, scrambling for a camera.

“I wanted this to be the first thing I did this year.” Billy was grinning like an idiot, Steve was taking picture after picture, his big eyes full of tears. “I know you want to establish our lives before bonding or having pups, and that’s okay, we can just be engaged for a couple years, whatever you want.” Nancy had one hand in front of her mouth, tears dripping down her cheeks. “Whatdya say?”

“Oh my god, absolutely yes!” Billy and Steve cheered as Jon stood up, kissing Nancy before sliding the ring on her finger.

#yikes writes #mango #me before this part: I have never heard of the Wheeler family ever in my life #harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #harringrove abo #steve harrington x billy hargrove #billy hargrove x steve harrington #omega steve harrington #alpha billy hargrove #mpreg

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justlookatthosesausages · 4 years

Note

Yo! For the prompt request, seeing that Elsa has a buddy like Nokk the water spirit, how about Anna finding an old childhood friend which is a dragon in the Enchanted forest?

(an… old childhood friend?? XD did i miss something in frozen? lol)

=======

“That’s a… A… A…” Blabbered Elsa, eyes wide, struggling as she gulped. “A…”

“A dragon, yes.” Said Anna in a flat voice.

Elsa’s pointing finger fell in disbelief, her wrist hanging.

“For someone who lives in an Enchanted Forest, I expected you to find your vocabulary way easier.”

Elsa’s shoulders had slumped, but now she suddenly raised her arms.

“But that’s a DRAGON, Anna!! A dragon!!”

Both the creature and Anna winced at her sharp scream.

“Well spotted.” Chuckled the redhead.

“How- When- WHERE did you even find a dragon in the forest, Anna?!”

The Queen shrugged. “A bit more West.”

Elsa’s eyes now were two huge balls or utter panic and incomprehension. “There’s NO dragons in the forest. Like, nowhere.”

“Seems like I have better eyes than you.” She said, proud, her hands on her hips.

Elsa had never been closer to a facepalm in the entire year. “I can sense all magical creatures, Anna. This dragon isn’t from there, I would have noticed it.”

Anna now pouted. “Well, you didn’t, because I found it, and--” She then interrupted herself, and clapped her hands together. “Ooooooh, wait! I know!”

She turned her head up to the dragon’s face. “Hey, Amber, can you do your trick?”

The dragon seemed to understand, and before Elsa even reacted to the name Anna apparently had given them, the latter’s scales vibrated in the day light and slowly turned transparent. In a few seconds, the whole dragon disappeared, and the Northuldra, who were present and had assisted to the scene since the dragon landed in the meadow with Anna on her back, all gasped in surprise.

It wasn’t all: Elsa abruptly couldn’t sense it anymore. The magic it emanated had vanished. It was like it was gone, and yet the grass bending was clearly indicating the presence of the giant animal.

“So that’s how.” She muttered in an exhale.

The blonde blinked and suddenly shook her head. Now wasn’t the time to admire magic. Now was the time to scold her younger sister for ADOPTING A DRAGON.

“Anna... You named it?”

The Queen smiled with a nod, and the dragon’s scales reappeared with the same vibration. She petted their belly - which was so high that she had to stretch all her arm vertically - and giggled.

“Yes. Amber. It’s a play on words, because of ‘ember’. You got it? Because she’s a girl.”

Elsa blinked in confusion for probably the thirtieth time. “It’s a she??”

Checking the dragon’s genitals really was the last thing she wanted to do, so she believed her sister right away.

“Yes, and she loves belly scratches. Don’t you, pretty girl?” Said Anna with a baby voice and a kiss pout.

The dragon groaned in a way that sounded like a purr.

“I’m dreaming. Tell me I’m dreaming.” Whispered Elsa.

“You’re not dreaming.” Said Honeymaren and Ryder on the same voice, standing on each side of her. Their jaws hadn’t come up since the dragon did her invisibility trick.

The Snow Queen stepped closer. “I know what you’re going to ask. If you can keep her. And Anna, I regret to tell you that, but it’s out of question.”

“And I knew you were going to say that. Breaking news: I’m the Queen. I do what I want. I now officially declare that it’s legal to adopt dragons.”

“Oh, you want to play that game?” Frowned Elsa. “You’re in Northuldra territory. And that dragon obviously lives here. It’s up to the Northuldra people to decide if you take it or not.”

“Well, as I’m half-Northuldra...” Started Anna, standing stiff.

“It’s also up to the dragon herself. I doubt that she wants to go down Arendelle with the city life. If she were able to talk, she would tell you she’s not interested.”

Elsa had her hands on her hips, sarcasm overflowing, convinced she had won.

“Oh, but I can talk.”

Everyone jumped and turned their eyes up at the deep and hollow voice that had just resonated. The dragon looked down at Elsa with intense orange eyes and attentive pupils.

The Snow Queen started so much she almost fell back. The Northuldra gasped in unison. Two Northuldra instantly fainted. Northuldra children screamed in joy. One Northuldra ran to launch himself in Yelana’s arms and she pushed them away with her staff.

Elsa’s widened eyes were fixed to the dragon’s smiling ones. “Y...” She murmured, sound barely escaping her throat.

“You can TALK??”

And to everyone’s surprise, she added:

“AND YOU DIDN’T INTERVENE BEFORE?!”

Anna and the dragon stared at her. Was she being bossy? Towards a giant dragon she had just met?

“Well, I like to listen to humans and spirits. I preferred to let you two finish before saying anything. The Water Spirit told me you were a very stubborn one.”

Elsa’s jaw first dropped, and then she vividly twirled to Nokk who was standing nearby, and they immediately retracted at her gaze.

“You knew?”

“It’s kinda obvious that she can talk.” Said Anna, reminding her of her presence. “How do you think we came up with the name Amber? She fully agreed on it. Just like she’s okay to come live in Arendelle.”

Elsa stood still, and everyone turned to her. A long silence passed.

“I... I need to sit down for a moment.”

As she walked to the Northuldra camp, she passed by Nokk. “You and I are going to have a little discussion after that.”

A lump of water went down Nokk’s neck, and it had nothing to do with the fact it was made out of water.

Gale twirled above them with a giggling sound of bells.

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purplesurveys · 3 years

Text

1013

surveys by -thoughtlessdork

Have you ever had the chicken pox? No. I’m constantly in a place of waiting for it to pass by, because everyone tells me all people are bound to have it at one point in their lives (idk how true that is, though). I am also told it gets a lot suckier as one gets older, so...not too thrilled about it at all.

how often do you do laundry? I don’t handle that chore myself, but it’s done 1–2 times a week in our house.

Have you ever been evicted? Nopes.

would you grow your own garden? I don’t see that happening. I’m a magnet for killing plants.

do you know anyone who snores? I do.

Trigger warning kinda, by the end.

what is your favorite font? Proxima Nova. It’s the default font that my org used for all documents and works-in-progress, and it ended up becoming my actual real-life favorite. I’ve always picked out that font even outside of org matters.

do you know what a wombat is? Sure.

would you make a good movie critic? Not at all. I don’t know enough about different filmmaking elements to make a reliable critic. I’ve criticized things like acting, plots, and dialogues in the past, of course; but there’s still so many things that go into films that aren’t overtly projected like lighting, symbolism, hidden meanings, etc. I don’t have a very good nose for those.

what goal are you aiming for this year? In the last 8 weeks of the year? Hmm...avoiding corona would be at the top of that list, lmao.

are you currently reading any books at the moment? No. I’ve stopped opening the book I used to constantly mention on here.

when i say foxy lady what comes to mind? Beyoncé’s character in the Austin Powers movie she was in lol; her name was Foxxy.

would you have liked to have lived during the Victorian times? Wasn’t this era like a golden age of sorts for the UK? I’d love to visit for that purpose; but given the still-horrible hygiene and living conditions for most people of the time, I wouldn’t choose to live there.

would you own a Siamese cat? No.

have you ever had an ultimate adrenaline rush? I don’t think so. I’ve had bursts of energy in the past, but I wouldn’t call any of them an ultimate adrenaline rush.

do you like deviled eggs? I’ve never had them; it’s not a common dish here. But they always look so good in the American shows I watch??? I really hope they taste as good as they look.

what tends to upset you? Hearing anything about animal abuse.

what's the farthest you've walked? I can’t give you a distance, but my parents opted for us to walk the whole time we were in Bali (except if we had a tour day which included transportation). Walking in an unfamiliar - and very humid - country and not knowing where anything is (this was before food and travel apps got as detailed as they are today) and ending up walking long stretches because you can’t locate any good local spots is a very easy way to run out of patience, apparently.

what is your favorite horror movie? Carrie was pretty fun.

what does your favorite shirt look like? It’s a twist on the Chicago flag, made black and red and with a raised fist in the middle. At the back it says “CM Punk: Best in the World.” Been my favorite and most overused shirt for the past 9 years. My friends tease me about it sometimes, but I don’t care lol, the shirt is very significant to me.

is your life like a daily routine? It is, but I prefer that it is. I like when things are in my control and, for the most part, predictable. I enjoy spontaneity in short bursts.

were you ever told as a child if you eat carrots you'll have pretty eyes? So many times.

what career are you most interested in? Communications and media, so it’s great that I’m headed there so far.

have you ever seen a rooster? Sure.

what time do you usually wake up? I wake up wake up by 7:30 or 8 AM, but I usually also wake up for a bit any time between 4–6 AM. Sometimes I choose to stay up from then, and sometimes I’d want to go back to sleep.

what do you think about religion? It’s good when people use it for good, or if it has helped save a person’s life. In my own personal experience, though, it’s beenhard to find Christians who aren’t hypocritical. So even though I see religion’s potential, I don’t have a lot of trust in believers themselves.

what made you feel most accomplished in your life so far? Graduating college.

have you ever seen a lunar eclipse? I saw the super blue blood moon two years ago, which according to a quick Google search is a lunar eclipse! So yeah, I’ve seen one.

what are you allergic to? No allergies.

do you ever feel like people hold things you do or say against you? Only my mom does this.

what can't you afford but wish you could? Front-row Wrestlemania tickets. My childhood (and now adulthood) dream is to go to Mania 50 which is only 14 years from now, but at least I still have more than enough time to save up for it.

what is one word that sums up this year so far? Revelatory. ever felt like you were putting your life in danger? [trigger warning] Yes, it’s called suicidal tendencies. what do you like with your eggs? If scrambled, with cheese. If omelette...stuff that crap up with everything lol. Tomatoes, bell peppers, mushrooms, cheese, ham, bacon, and onions are all good in my book. what remedy do you partake when experiencing the common cold? The good ol’ wait-for-it-to-go-away life hack. would you ever spend a weekend in the mountains in a log cabin? That sounds amazing. I sure would. have you ever been called a psycho? No. have you ever taken martial arts? would you? No but I was always a little envious of my cousin who was taken to taekwondo class every weekend when we were kids. Sure, I’d take classes if I had the chance. who is someone you look up to? Nacho, but he’s gone now. is there something you're anxious about? I have work jitters for tomorrow, but they’re manageable for now. Otherwise I’m feeling pretty good. what is the longest you've gone without sleep? A little above 24. what is the longest you've been on the phone? This makes me cringe now, but it was like 8 hours long or something like that. It was still the ~honeymoon phase of that relationship and we were still clingy. We never did it again after that. do you care about calories? No. do you know someone with a really annoying laugh? Nah, can’t think of anyone. what band do you mostly always listen to no matter what mood? Paramore. have you ever been to Indianapolis? Nope.

what type of bread do you like to eat? I eat white bread all the time, but my favorite kind is brioche. do you have any great great grandparents still living? Two greats is a bit too much don’t you think? Lmao. Anyway, my last great-grandparent died in 2010. I never knew my dad’s grandparents, and my great-grandfather on my mom’s side had died all the way back in the 70s. what is one country that you really want to visit someday? India. who usually cooks or what do you usually crave the most? Those are two different questions haha. My parents take turn cooking; and as for my craving, I find myself seeking sushi most of the time. ever been associated in a program that was a complete waste of time? Yep, like that one time I had to attend this 5-hour mandatory program/seminar before my driver’s license could be issued to me; it taught me nothing I didn’t already know about driving, and it used driving tutorials that I’m pretty sure were recorded in the 90s. This seminar took place in 2016. do weird numbers call your phone? Not regularly. Occasionally an unknown number will come in, but I reject all those. where are you right now? Sitting up on my bed. do you tend to care about other people's feelings more than your own? Yes. I really shouldn’t. what type of lifestyle do you want to obtain? if you haven't obtained it [trigger warning] I haven’t even figured out yet if I love life enough to want to stay in it. A type of lifestyle isn’t much of a priority for now. what was something that use to frighten you as a child? Getting lost at the mall. have you ever been on a train? Just once. who's been in your life the longest? did you expect this person to still be around? Apart from family, Angela. Yes, she’s here for the long haul. how do you feel about anatomy? Fascinating. I’d take a class on it. Insert interesting fact here: Read this on Reddit a few days ago, so I’ll just copy-paste the whole thing: “When Jadwiga, the King of Poland (medieval Poland referred to every ruler as King regardless of gender), was considering a marriage proposal from the Grand Duke of Lithuania, a chief concern among her court was that said Duke was rumored to have massive genitals to the point that they would kill his wife on their wedding night. Two of her councilors volunteered to travel to Lithuania to try and discover the truth of these rumors, which naturally meant they would watch the Duke as he bathed. They returned and happily reported that not only weren’t the Duke’s genitals fatally large, they were in fact a tad smaller than average, so nothing to worry about. Thus Poland and Lithuania were united, and the rest is history.” Got a chuckle out of that one when I read it that I just had to scroll through the entire thread again just to be able to share it here lmao.

#survey #surveys

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radmanraditz · 5 years

Text

SHIPPING INFO. Answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog. REPOST. Don’t reblog.

{Mun Note: Did this all the way back in September, at the end of December in 2017, and again in May 2018 so this needs an update! Cuz whooo boi shipping on this blog has been a wild ride.}

{icon art by @bardocks-bandanna // @bluexblonde}

WHAT’S YOUR OTP FOR YOUR MUSE?:

As of writing this, Raditz is actively involved with @stoplickingthingsweird‘s Turles and @bluexblonde‘s Launch.

I also have a crossover crack!ship with him for the fanfics I want to write.

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO RP WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?:

I’m good with doing anything I feel would be in-character for my muse to do.

I’m used to shipping him with women, but my portrayal of Raditz is bicurious/bisexual. Men mostly come at my muse with a competitive attitude in the past, so he has more of a preference for women.

Raditz himself might be less comfortable with being pushed out of his comfort zone in terms of emotional intimacy, but with the right muses he will get there. Eventually. Some will get it sooner than others depending on their personality and how they treat him. He can become emotionally withdrawn too if your muse treats him in a way he doesn’t like, or he feels pressured to say things like “I love you” too soon or when he doesn’t mean it. I wouldn’t take it as a bad thing though, because if he is saying he loves you soon, he’s probably just saying that to keep your muse appeased and get what he wants. My writing will hint to that if he doesn’t truly care about your muse.

I do tell people I won’t hold their hands for wooing my muse(s), but I do leave breadcrumbs in my writing and in asks and memes. If you are shipping with me or are interested in it, you have to talk to me directly OOC and do so on a reasonably regular basis in order to plot things out.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?:

Any muse or mun under 18 is not allowed to ship with me or my muse, or put themselves into dating/intimacy situations either. If you are over 18 and your muse is at least 18, they’re fair game to Raditz. (Though I’d prefer if your muse isn’t that young.) He’s not into people who are a lot older than him that look their old age, and he might look down on a person who acts too young.

Keep in mind that Raditz’s age in canon is generally estimated between 29-35.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?:

I wasn’t in the past, but currently yeah, I am pretty selective. Dangerously close to being disinterested in shipping with other people aside from my two current shipping partners. I’ve just dealt with too much bullshit from ex-shipping partners.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY’RE CONSIDERED NSFW?:

After the Tumblr Purge of 2018, it’s supposed to be ok to write naughty time stuff, but I’m still pretty much keeping NSFT things to Discord. (Yeah that means I’m finally comfortable writing smut again. Just in private, and only with partners I’m comfortable writing that with.)

When it comes to talking, anything that starts to get dirty with graphic sexual activity details is what I’d consider NSFW. Detailed descriptions of sexualized body parts, groping/stroking of genitals or breasts are things I consider NSFW. Also detailed sexual fantasy thoughts and emotions felt during physical activity can be too. Basically if you could get into trouble for getting caught reading it at work, or I don’t think the content is suitable for minors to be reading, I’d consider it NSFW and tag it accordingly. Since the Purge, my tags are #Lemon Goodness and #Touch of Citrus

Blatantly stating things like: sex, penis, vagina, kinky, “let’s fuck” or other such things, I wouldn’t think are worth labeling and tagging. Grabbing, smacking, or rubbing a butt isn’t NSFW to me unless said butt is bare and/or the muses are starting to do something sexual in nature.

WHO ARE OTHER MUSES YOU SHIP YOUR MUSE WITH?:

Turles and Raditz were friends back when they were children. (No we don’t follow the doujinshi Dragonball Zero story as part of our canon.) At least until they became more distant with one another and Turles went AWOL from the PTO. In his Wished Back to Life verse, Raditz uses the dragon balls to wish Turles back to life, and now the two estranged friends are trying to get to know each other again. There is more plotted out, and we’ve had more interactions on Discord due to my busy schedule and the close IRL friendship between Skully-mun and I have. This is not our first venture into writing a ship together, so the friendship and eventual romantic relationship between the muses is something I look forward to since we’re such close friends ourselves who have been through a lot and we already know how to work with one another.

Launch and Raditz aren’t romantically involved at the moment, but he has a one-sided crush on her with a plotted plan to have them get together sometime after the Cell Games. They have a lot of rocky moments since they’re meeting at the lowest points of their lives in that AU. Also because Raditz is trying to adjust to life on Earth, and he’s not the easiest person to get along with. But there’s decent chemistry potential between them, and I enjoy plotting and writing with Reggie.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:

Yeah. Otherwise I won’t recognize it.

Chemistry between muses can develop slowly or out of the blue, but I still need to see that Raditz is indeed interested in the other muse and confirm OOC between us muns before I recognize it as a ship.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?:

Whenever I see potential chemistry. I like ships that help both characters grow as people, especially if it’s a positive relationship.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?:

Yep. Raditz’s blog is a multi-ship blog where every ship is its own AU.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?:

I enjoy shipping and crack!shipping with fandom stuff. When it comes to roleplay though, I just do my thing and see what happens. I want to see strong chemistry to write a convincing relationship between two characters when I ship for RP. I’m not fond of easy fluff or insta-romances, or the anime romance tropes that perpetuate unhealthy relationship habits. So I guess I’m more in the middle, someone who enjoys shipping on a healthy level.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?:

I like Raditz x Turles for M/M shipping. Thanks Skully-mun!

For the heterosexual side of things, I like seeing Raditz shipped with Launch, Maron, (Krillin’s ex not his daughter) and Princess Snake.

I crossover crack!ship him with Mihoshi Kuramitsu from Tenchi Muyo! too. (For my own fanfiction.)

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?:

I would appreciate it if people gave me my space on the subject if you’re interested/potentially interested in shipping with me and we aren’t already. Because I’m afraid I’m not going to be positive about it for awhile. Shipping takes a lot of time and effort with me, and I’m dealing with a physical illness that makes me a really slow RP partner. Not only that, but I’m still trying to get over how salty I feel towards shipping thanks to several ex-shipping partners who made shipping and roleplaying unpleasant for me last year because of how they use/used rp for toxic selfish reasons, and how their shitty behavior affected me and a lot of other people IRL. I really don’t want nor need any extra drama that often comes with shipping partners that I don’t know too well personally. So right now, I feel like I don’t have the proper attitude or time to devote to newer shipping partners along with my current ones. And I’m not sure when that’ll change. But if you’re really interested? Stick around, talk with me OOC, see if we have good mun and writing chemistry, and finally just interact with Raditz for a bit and we’ll see if chemistry can develop naturally between our muses. Because sometimes ships happen when we least expect them to.

Thanks for reading.

TAGGED BY.

This is just another update since a lot has changed since May last year.

TAGGING.

Anyone else who would like to do this!

#long post #tag meme #shipping info for partners #(got rid of more exes)#(coming out about how I've felt since December)#(but yep this is where my muse and I are on the subject of shipping)

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cooljazsheepie · 7 years

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Webcomic Creator Interview with Kosmic of Feast for a King

Hi, all! I usually don’t post my webcomic creator interviews on this account, but this one is special since the comic is explicitly NSFW. The creator, Kosmic, is super awesome though and deserved an interview anyway. Check it after the cut.

Me: Please introduce yourself.

Kosmic: My name is Kosmic and I make two comics currently, Feast for a King and Eggshells. Although I mostly focus on Feast for a King! Which is a really graphically violent/sexual story about man eating worms in a sci-fi setting. I started it in September 2014 and I’ve basically been working every day on it since then.

Me: What made you pick sci-fi?

Kosmic: I’ve always really loved sci-fi stuff!! Many of my favorite stories/movies are sci-fi or have some robot/alien elements to them. I think it’d be more accurate to say that sci-fi picked me because FFAK was inspired by a dream I had which had some very strong sci-fi elements and visuals. I think at the time when I started FFAK, I was also feeling really inspired by the first two Terminator movies and wanted to like, take the elements about that i found successful in those movies and include them in my own story! I liked how much the characters struggled and how hopeless it felt to face their enemies, but they kept going anyway despite being so afraid. I also had a bunch of stories/characters I worked on sometimes that was really just my own version of Trigun that I didn’t know what to do with and just...felt like building on more of that type of world. I think I first started those characters in like 2009 but they were basically just back-burner ideas for something eventually. I got a lot of story material like that!!

Me: Do you have a favorite part of the creative process when you're working on your comic?

Kosmic: Favorite part of he process...That is kinda difficult. There are so many parts that I enjoy that blend in with each other, it’s hard to determine when one step begins and the other ends. Brainstorming with music is always really nice, especially if it’s in the afternoon and I don’t have any responsibilities to worry about. I do a lot of self RP too. I can go anywhere in the story I feel like and just let my mind explore freely!! Its always very fun/exciting to discover things I didn’t expect or when some connection suddenly clicks that opens up new doors of ideas! SO.. daydreaming is my favorite part, I suppose. That feels kinda basic to say, but I can’t think of anything that tops it!

Me: Nooo. I totally get what you mean. Just letting ideas come to you is the best! You do color and black&white comics. Do you prefer one over the other?

Kosmic: I don’t really like the look of colored comics for the most part, honestly. I find it way too mentally distracting and I find it often takes me out of the story by making me too aware I’m reading something. So, I generally prefer the look of B&W comics when I’m the one reading. However! I personally find it boring to do for too long if I’m the one working!! I hate doing the same stuff for too long and black/white communicates a certain type of atmosphere to me, so after a while it can feel kinda stiff or limited when I don’t...really need to be?? I used to be determined to only use B/W ONLY EVER!!! and now I am allowing myself the freedom to experiment using some aspects of color to communicate my ideas and not worry about a consistent look too much lol. I sort of feel like my comics fall somewhere in the middle because they obviously DO use color but aren’t like the ‘typical’ full color comic, I guess? I dunno. That’s how i interpret it anyway. I am breaking my own rules of what looks good!!! If I had to make a decision, it would still B&W over color. :3

Me: Do the colors you pick have a certain significance for the characters? Like I know you have several named after them and the worms are colored by status.

Kosmic: Yes! Totally. They are super important! I have a whole color lore or color language I have built in the story. I dont really focus on like...every color in the rainbow though. Its mostly with basic default-y colors of Red/Yellow/Blue + Green. Red and Green being the most important ones I use in FFAK. I reflect a lot on their dynamic and parallel in several different ways with various designs and narratives, Crimson and Celadon’s relationship is also meant to be a direct translation of that conflict and bond I see with those two colors in the context of the story as well. Red and Green is like the ...PURE EXPRESSION OF LIFE AND DEATH!!! or something.

Me: For your worms, do you choose certain animals for them or you just go by whatever? Like how Paper is a bunny.

Kosmic: Nah, I mostly go by whatever and many worm designs are just improvised on the spot as these weird...animal chimera things. Paper is sort of an odd one out because she’s specifically very bunny-themed.

Me: Do you have a favorite character?

Kosmic: Crimson’s my absolute favorite character!! However... Knife is also very important. I guess he’s a close 2nd. I just have put a staggering amount of work/history into both characters they both kinda stand out a little bit from the rest lol.

Me: I know you said to just read whatever, but how does the use of gender shape your comic? As a creator.

Kosmic: I suppose it shapes a lot and yet it...doesn’t? IDK, it’s difficult to explain cause I think gender is a broad topic and I’m not sure what parts to focus on with it shaping? Haha. Most of my characters are just self-inserts really. It’s not really a conscious thing that I feel like I need to fit a quota of or something. I just sort of naturally feel the need to articulate feelings about my experiences using the characters sometimes. I also generally use my comic as a safe place to explore my thoughts about identity and sexuality. It makes the comic really personal/vulnerable/stressful sometimes, but I also feel like I understand myself a little easier. As much as I reflect on it I don't really have a concise answer or reason.. it’s just part of life! So there it is!

Me: Do you find that you attract or put off readers with the sex? Like do people expect a hentai situation? Or ignore the warning and get mad about it?

Kosmic: Yeah, it definitely rocks the boat a bit. I get a lot of polarized reactions from my sexual content. Mostly it’s supported and people understand and respect what I do with it, but I have definitely received negative comments or like, people feeling betrayed it was included at all. (Nothing upset people more than that period sex scene in chapter 11 for example .) It’s also often described as a vore fetish comic which I also...have mixed feelings with LMFAO. It just feels really misleading and simplifying the narrative. I think the fact that I include genitals in my drawings [means] people get the impression it’s supposed to be a smutty hentai comic, but then when they read it isn’t that either. So it’s hard for people to determine what it is. It pushes buttons, I guess. good and bad.

Me: Who is your intended audience or do you not have one?

Kosmic: I don’t really have an intended audience!!! I just draw it as much for me as possible. :D

Me: What made you decide on making a webcomic?

Kosmic: I’ve been determined to make comics since i was like...13 or 14? And webcomics are very freeing!! You just post it and go!! Nothing can stop you from making your story how you want and I love that.

Me: Do you have any advice for other creators?

Kosmic: Advice is tough... But I suppose it is important to establish your boundaries between yourself and the audience. Your enjoyment and relationship you have with yourself and your art is what is most important. So be careful not to burn yourself out on what people will think/say/ask and it’s OK to feel overwhelmed and over-stimulated sometimes. Even when it’s positive attention, it can still be just as stressful and draining. I find that’s the hardest part about making a comic is learning how to deal with the reception rather than making the comic itself lmao. So yeah! Draw and write what you want! Always. But also give yourself a private place only for you, so you can reflect on your journey. :3

Me: That's great advice. Do you plan on making a print version?

Kosmic: My friend Cameron made Chapter 1 into a book and mailed it to me as a surprise. But besides that, I have no actual plans or real desire to make a printed version.It seems like it would take a lot of work to do and I’m very lazy. Maybe some sort of art book would be more ideal, but who knows!

Me: Will you be attending any cons or making any merch?

Kosmic: I went to one con in 2015! I sold like...a single poster I think. It was fun (especially because a friend from Canada was staying and helped tremendously with it,I also got interviewed the first time there!) but not exactly the ideal experience. Another friend also made keychains for me of the characters that we sold online. But, besides that, I don’t have any cons planned. I want to make t-shirts in the future, but I’m so slow to do these things. I just really need to take the plunge, but I generally get intimidated by money making stuff!!

Me: Do you do art full time?

Kosmic: Yes LOL. FFAK is basically my life. I do educational/instructional flash animations as well for the monies, but I am pretty broke most of the time. If it weren't for Patreon, IDK what I’d do!! I am so thankful for it.

And that’s it. I already linked Kosmic’s Tumblr profile, but you can also follow them on Twitter for personal or comic updates! If you have any comments or questions, feel free to post here or submit an ask. If you would like to be interviewed for your own comic, contact me here for explicitly NSFW content or over on my literacy blog if your work doesn’t have content restrictions that make it NSFW. Please also feel free to suggest artists for me to interview.

#kosmicdream #kosmic #feast for a king #webcomic interview

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hgfstreamchats · 4 years

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El Arca

Hello! Hello there! paused Castlevania for christian lion sex Castlevania would understand. but they just found the giant demon that I very much wish to smooch!!! Is the sound functioning? tis! Excellent! Oh, there we go Sound seems okay Well, in that case, I won't delay! Onto the lions we go. It was being... "funny" he wants a cursed kids show he should go watch donkey ollie agin Deleting my messages and so on OH NO NOAHS ARK Ahh, I see you're ahead of the game! I'm deeply suspicious already. did Saberspark ever upload his edited version that includes *all* the jokes You'll love it, night human. It's got lovingly rendered animal excrement. No, but this is the uncut version. oh good Jesus it does not help that they have regular human hands youre gonna see chicken strips, night When you say "chicken strips"... do you mean that a chicken strips? you'll see mr.... noseybonk.... jesus fucking christ And fire. Uh.... yeaah that's about normal for discord servers As you can see, we're off to a great start. prostitutes thinkin he's Zeus

Ha! HAH! I really dont wanna see that one dude's teeth like that again This seems. Familiar but not too familiar.... Oh man you are NOT gonna like what happens to those trees when they get soaked in seawater. the children are brats she's dumping him lmao Good for her! This is perverse. "are you... the devil" It really is. Especially your grandparents' trees. -calmly- "that's enough :)" And all those slaves you went into debt to free. I mean hey, at least the debt will be gone too! "what do you mean, the fuck do I know about boatbuilding" That's something! "well then. we're all going to die!" "Oh, finally!" "haha, we're all going to die" Oh. Well, that answers that. this is.... surprisingly well done "No more, no less. I want lots of sickly, genetically doomed animals in this new world." Is this some kind of... antisemitic caricature Probably. "kind of making me feel inadequate" chicken strips! Still less self-centered and malevolent than Primus. Pffff Okay, so, chickens don't have... mammaries. So is this some kind of weird roleplaying thing? Are the chickens furries?? He's summoned as many animals as he knows how to spell. Sorry, Xoloitzcuintli. this movine needs to slow the fuck down oh my god official favorite character I like how he spent valuable time illustrating each one. "I am SO going to this sex resort" She looks awfully happy for someone who just learned everyone she knows is going to die in a flood And the parents look awfully happy for people who just learned THEY'RE going to die in a flood they're going to spend the end times fragging I would. ...And did, come to think of it. Ayyyy. Her? Ahhh, a liar. I like him! I love her They're one another's beards for the sake of surviving the flood. And that's wonderful. True. Who made that chair. some of these animals are super uggo Wait, did both of those kangaroos have pouches? Hang on, were those--yeah, that They do! lesbians I support them The orangutans weren't the only ones to beat the system. Maybe they're pregnant That'd explain how come there's still kangaroos Ironically, if they got pregnant by different parents, they'd be the most genetically diverse species in the world. *partners Yes, exactly! "what was that last one 8)" ...Want to know a fun fact about kangaroos :) that they have multiple vaginas? ...Yes. that still fucks me up Their genitals are positioned in reverse? Oh, that. All this out of a patch of trees? They are PROUD of that model Y'know, you'd think that a LOT of other people would have survived. There was more than one boat in the world at the time this is set Okay so what ARE the carnivores going to eat idk why they call her fat. she's got an ass that just don't quit and I think that lion;s a fool for choosing some other lioness But the other one has tiddies. Lion tiddies. And a clever mouth, apparently. Where's the pig's partner? he is a bi disaster The male lion, I mean he is He'd be dead after that. But what ARE the predators going to eat There was a single, doddering old lion in the group. Maybe they're going to divide him up? Write up her report. "Write up my report" = "Legitimately weighing my choices between mating with you or a watery death." Harsh but fair. Ahhh, Perfect Storm-ing it. Well well well. "See, I'd rather room with that tiger" Hello! Hello! Hello, sorry I'm late--is this that weirdo Noah's Ark furry disaster?! It is! It IS Damn "hey do you guys hear music" ....Carrion. *Dear Unicron, are they feeding on the drowned corpses of the dead?* .... oh hey it's the vampires' plan from castlevania Oh hey, that's a possibility They bob right by and they just scoop them up. It makes as much sense as anything else Although, after forty days... reptile room Heheheheh those snakes just wanted to mlem!!!! hahahah "woah that is NOT the letter I got" okay well that explains how the carnivores arre geting fed FEESH Oh right I guess the carnivores are eating fish Fish aren't people! Considering they haven't broken out into an orgy, I'd say they're showing surprising restraint. a least he feels bad about it She has lipstick THATS THE SECOND TIME They... both have pouches. The good ship Bad Decisions in action The kangaroos got away with it. thats way more than two chickens though I guess to be fair eggs are necessary "THEN we can eat them" FISH AND EGGS YOU DUMB LASS this dude has the right idea What...w as that what is ANY of this Who even knows? Where's your *one* female? I like that he's buds with the pig trying to think of what a panlion would look like given ligers and tigons exist she's giving u the key to her vag I wonder where the male panther is https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/39/Leopon01.jpg Found some. oh cute! Huh. In this scene: shadows are rendered. I'm sorry is her name "panty" Panthy, I think, but that's still BAD How charming and necessary. Wow, what a necessary scene those jerks should be thankful the raccoons helped them out All that craftsmanship and you couldn't rig the piles and piles of excrement to dump neatly into the water? nah that'd be too easy Ease of cleanup and sticking it to your god at the same time. Bah I bet he's not even dead that's three Oh no, they kicked the ladder down. How will he ever get out now he pinched a tiger's rear Does it even matter who steers, I mean none of them know where they're going "quick, smear this blood on your tits" lock him in the slammer oh so that's why it matters whether they can steer Where's he going to pause or rest? ... this is the worst haka I've ever seen doc I'm begging you to look up real hakas after this film to cleanse my eyes Will do. hahahah That was dark. "surrender, we can have a threesome" how convenient Already so many rabbits Monarchy or cannibalism. The only two choices. "You're here even though you got to this point in your life without knowing fire does that!" "did that lion just look at me?" holy shit lmao It gets caught in a southwesterly breeze and the ship goes up in flames. hukkhhkhkjhjk well the polar bears will be fine! Right? well I guess it woulkdnt be a south american made film without a huge party at the end Uh They're. Making her cage dance? I don't think they're making her do a thing LOL ALSO I'M SORRY WERE THE DONKEY AND DEER DOING IT IN THE CONGA LINE They've told her multiple times she's free to leave that cage. that was Well, then! look at that dummy thick jaguar That sure did happen That WAS. Let us be thankful it is over That certainly was a thing that happened. now for a much needed reprieve Peel off the tracksuits. I've seen some vids of the womens soccer team from NZ doing hakas and it's absolutely great Much better than the orangutan doing it. for sure Oh, good, she's sixteen Yikes Ewwwwwww I will be honest I thought this was going to be an LP a Planet Coaster thing It's exactly that, but you know...real. God "due to tax state regulation" ...oh, I bet that was LAX state regulation He's clearly someone who has any business demanding "the prettiest girl." [wasted] The advice in question" "Don't" Right? "We are smarter than everyone and that's why we're building the MURDERCOASTER" That one got to live. that kid's smart Apathetic Child is the smartest one in the video. Well that's not good jesus christ is that blood It is. They certainly did show those idiot mathematicians, physicists, and engineers. JESUS CHRIST Jesus Questions about the inspection process. Something special. "We all have something special to hold onto." Like a severed head. christ I'm gonna bump out for now. take caare all! Goodnight! Good night! Wait, did we watch the roller coaster one? I know I've seen THIS one... hmmmm Oh! With the giant hole! The giant body trench? Yes! Glorious! In that case, I'm all out of light notes to end on. Suggestions? SNL What's That Name? We could just browse this channel a little bit and look for one we haven't seen! All the ones I've seen have been... fun. This, then we'll browse the channel. I'm for it. God Hahhahaha Ohhh boy Finish that thought God They all look good tbh. True, true. Fire. I like it. Now I'm slightly nostalgic for Interface on Wheels. Do tell! Ohhhh I've forgotten everything about the game save that my city was called that. Just imagine driving through this place I will not. Well then. Drive into the Void. Hey, it makes sense, you can bet on the games. I'm curious to see how the fire's going to happen. I mean, they seem to be happening on their own just fine Lovely. Oh no! The orphanage! It's Little Lamplight! Hey, I'm up for another if you are. same! Excellent! THIS is the one. Ha! Dear lord. It lives there now. This is like bizarro Ratatouille It's majestic. How else will the customers get their daily dose of broken glass? So ungrateful \o/ Yes. Yessss. One more? Sure! Yes. And why wouldn't it be. I like how carefully they rendered the butt. Priorities. VERISIMILITUDE I've known medbay Eradicons that would if they could. Amazing. Oh Boy As a doctor, I can verify every single thing about this. I love it. I love their walk animations. It's like they're on roller skates. It does! or those wheelieshoes Heelies! yes! those. 24/7 Are those bloodstains Oh yes. Uh oh! I like the blow dryer next to her bed. Amazing. The only note worth ending on, something terrible happening to Grace. You might even call it... a Grace note. ;) Terrible. Shame on you. I love it. It's what I'm here for! It is, in fact, your saving grace HAH! :D Although, frankly, I don't think ANYONE'S saving Grace. She had her chance to run. She sure did. Well--thanks for the stream! It's been a great time, as usual. :) Thank YOU for gracing me with your presence! Ha! Good night! good night! Good night!

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tumblunni · 7 years

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MAN I tried messing around starting newgame plus on Digimon Cyber Sleuth, even though I’ve played more than enough already so I’m not really gonna play again so soon after finishing. And... WHAT THE HELL?? Seriously this is like a one game microcosm of how you don’t realise how much you’re being mistreated until you see how the other side lives. Specifically on the subject of weird minority stereotypes... The difference between the designs/animations/general presentation of the two gender options is REALLY BIZARRE?? I had no clue! Playing as the girl you just kinda think ‘yeah thats weird maybe’ but you dont realise the dude doesnt have the same problems. Like... she VERY MUCH suffers from the ‘miss male character’ trope. She’s the weird sort of ‘lol sexy genderswap deviantart fanfiction’ version of a female option. I thought I was just reading too much into it with how the girl is posed like a supporting character on the boxart and literally never appeared in any of the promotional material until the game came out... Its just so... ODD! Everything EVERYTHING about her is defined to be this overthetop stereotypical idea of ‘we have to let them know she’s the girl version’. She’s far more sexualized, she always does these ‘girly’ or ‘hot’ poses for LITERALLY EVERYTHING! Like, the dude’s animation is just running but she has to run with her arms wide out to the sides, skipping like a five year old and swaying her hips. And her standing pose also has the hands out, her toes inturned, her chest thrust forwards and this general sort of ‘tee hee hee’ thing?? It really REALLY started to bug me how her chest is ALWAYS thrust forwards, I started to get super anxious about ‘holy shit am I ever doing that when I walk and i dont know it? is this really how female bodies are supposed to work??’. Its like her resting pose is this thing and its extremely painful for her to fold her joints back into a normal mode. And she’s always always posing when the dude isnt posing AT ALL, even her selection screen image is her doing the ‘one leg bounces back while you kiss someone’ type pose, contorted into a wild accordion while he’s just looking at the camera. I jsut... didnt even realise what was bothering me so much about playing as this character, til i saw the total absence of it on the dude... SERIOUSLY! He doesnt have some overstereotypical super huge macho animation set, his design isnt made to yell ‘I’M MALE’, he isnt sexualized, he isnt the ‘one body type everyone in this gender has to have’. He’s a scrawny androgenous waif that could have worked equally well if you slapped the label female on that design, somehow to make him female they decided they had to scoop out holes in his waist and hips and shove them on his chest. While also adding a bazillion extra animations that make her walk around everywhere like that one damn gif of terrible ragdoll physics as some guy walks down a road. I did not understand that whole assassins creed controversy about ‘but women need more animations, it’d be too much work to add them’. NOW I UNDERSTAND. Why on EARTH do they think they need these animations?? Women dont have to do everything differently to men to prove theyre women, in real life literally nobody worries about accentuating stereotypical gender roles while doing COMPLETELY NORMAL THINGS. Women dont put huge effort into looking cute or sexy while they’re just frickin walking down the street or standing alone in the privacy of their own home. Its like these people know so little about women outside of hollywood femme fatale movies that they legit think that sort of walk cycle is biologically ingrained into one gender???? The fact nobody ever acts like macho bodybuilder walk cycles should be given to normal tiny teenagers in every situation makes it pretty clear the difference here... And seriously, what is even this universal THING that ‘male are default, you need to mark a character as different to show she’s female’? Which usually means making her more feminine than the real female actor playing her, like that even makes a damn lick of sense :P I mean seriously if we’re gonna talk actual biology, men are the ‘different’. A species cannot exist with only men, the only one sex species are all female. Or lack a sex, or contain both sets of genitals. Also there is at least one bird species that has two male genders as well as female. And male seahorses get pregnant, and male clownfish can physically transition into females as part of their natural life cycle. And all sorts of far more diverse things we humans can barely understand! And like... you can say ‘women are the different and men are the blank, because women have boobs and men don’t’. But you can also say that women are the default because men are the same thing with penises added. And seriously, boobs are just nipples that actually serve their intended purpose. Women have this extra function compared to men because MALE BREASTS ARE VESTIGAL! The organ still exists, it just sits there doing nothing and never changes at puberty. (Though even that is more fluid that you’d expect, there are ways to induce lactation even if you’re a cis man. i dont really know why anyone would want to do that, it wouldnt exactly work as well, but whatever.) Aaaaand OF COURSE this entire thing is a stupid argument anyway because it only talks about biology, which is not the same thing as gender. Not to mention that biological sex isn’t all cut and dry either, the human species has A LOT of different intersex conditions. You can even have people who don’t have significant enough outward symptoms to be recognised as intersex at birth, who go their whole life thinking they’re a cis male only to suddenly find out they had an undiagnosed hormone condition and are technically a trans man. There is most definately no magical biological guideline for how men and women act. Especially frickin stupid nonsense like overspecific cultural guidelines on what’s cute for a woman to do while running, geez. You really can;t just ‘tell’ that someone is ‘really a woman’ or ‘really a man’ cos of how they act, and thats why this stuff pisses me off even when the story isnt saying anything about trans people. I’m so used to seeing this overexaggerated japanese concept of feminine/masculine mannerisms being used on trans stereotypes, it bugs me even seeing it being done to cis women... gahh this has gone wildly offtopic and I’m just venting Everything Bad About Stereotypes rather than the specific thing about this specific game I need to logoff and go cheer myself up. OH BUT yeah this game also literally has a friggin ‘we can tell this man is really a woman because mannerisms’ scene :P which also dissappointed the hell out of me cos it seemed like a trans character and instead it was the cliche I Had Some Reason To Pretend To Be A Man thing... Also apparantly instead of acting like that male persona, the male persona was magical brainwashing virtual reality stuff. What a wasted opportunity! You could have told us a lot of stuff about her personality from comparing how she acted while under this other fake personality, and what it implies she hides from other people. Like ‘hey, maybe she actually can be confident as long as she’s wearing a mask!’ Nah, everything badass or tough or sassy she did was just mind control. And she’s not trans. And blehh being outed by ‘acting like a girl’... Its so weird cos the game actually does have one trans npc in a sidequest, and has trans themes with a few major digimon. In the sense that they were male in previous seasons and have designs considered ‘masculine’ but take female forms when disguising themselves as humans. (and the player-controlled versions of these digivolutions even have different masculine voices matching earlier seasons!) Gahhhh at least I can sit here hugging my ambiguously genderqueer alphamon headcanons and nobody can tell me those arent canon cos the question was never answered either way! I hate the cliche answer that ‘yes all alphamons are male cos they ‘look male’, this one was just a man disguised as a woman’, but still even if that was the intent, it means the character is trans coded! EITHER OPTION IS TRANS TIME protect me, alphamon protect me from super gender essentialist game how do you even EXIST in this game?? seriously even your human disguise was super fanservicey weird female stereotypes mannnnnn i guess I had a few problems with this game aside from the one stupid rape scene :P aaaaand the problem of the game clearly being written assuming nobody would play the female option, so characters still constantly call you ‘he’ and such the only good consolation being that the game accidentally becomes Hella Gay, though I would have preferred canon lesbians instead of this weirdness WHY CANT FEI AND YUUKO BE CANON IT GOT SO CLOSE TO BEING CANON THEN FEI DISSAPPEARED FROM THE PLOT FOREVER only reappearing as a postgame newgame plus bonus boss that makes it impossible to complete the damn Masters Cup damn you fei damn you awesome amazing hella gay fei whom i love you deserved to be in a better game you deserved to be the matt-esque rival, i will never forget that you started off teasing that role and then just vanished... HELL, CAN SHE BE THE PROTAGONIST OF A SEQUEL OR SOMETHING game entirely about her and yuuko’s amazing story of love! also alphamon wandering in just to yell ‘I AM CANONICALLY TRANSGENDER’, make everyone a cup of coffee, and leave aaaaa why did i spend so long rambling every single complaint about this game, games in general, gender stereotypes in gender, life in general... its weird how just realizing ONE THING about a stupid walk cycle animation made me realise my general nebulous feeling of uncomfortableness that I could never explain about this game :P I am really excited for digimon world next order being better than this!

#long post #sorryyyy #bunni is a bit tired and sad and venty

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