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steam-beasts · 4 months

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Snowy Sea Rescue!

Most of the time, Brendam Docks was quite busy with many dockmen shouting out orders, cargo being lifted and loaded on to ships to and fro, trucks being shunted by Salty as he bantered on with Cranky or even Carly like usual.

But in winter, it was significantly more busy than ever with the Christmas rush, so there are fragile and brittle gifts being held in multiple boxes that are carried out to sea.

Salty's driver's wife had presents which were amongst many gifts that arrived by boat to the docks, and his driver was eagerly anticipating its arrival until today...

____________________________________________

"Fourth cargo ship coming up! Get ready lads... and lass!" The Dock manager called out.

The three dock cranes were hard at work, unloading multiple crates of different gifts on to flatbeds. Salty was also hard at work, shunting as many flatbeds as possible to the right places.

Carly groaned "ANOTHER one?! That's the eighth one today!"

"It's the Christmas rush, Carly. It's a normal thing around 'ere..." Cranky creaked "Anyway, why are YOU complaining? Haven't you ever had a Christmas rush back in Southampton?"

Carly sighed "Yes, but...ugh, I never had to multitask unloading FOUR boats at once! Even a couple years back, it wasn't THIS intense!" She panted, sliding over to another boat. Down on the rails, Salty cackled at the portal crane's groaning "Hahar, sounds like ye are a wee bit rusty in the joints, lassie!" He said.

Big Mickey chuckled quietly "Trust me, you two. Be glad we aren't at Tidmouth Harbour. Over there's probably twice as busy compared to here, since it's the biggest harbour on the island!"

"Couldn't 'ave spoken truer words, me hearty. We'd ALL be tired out if we worked thar. Har....though, t' be truthful, it be takin' it's toll on me as well" Salty admitted a sigh, the work had been a bit straining with Porter away for his big sleep. Cranky and Carly exchanged nervous wide-eyed glances before silently going back to work. They couldn't bear the thought of being at Tidmouth.

Salty's driver poked his head and looked over at one of the ships "Oi, mate! Are there any red crates over there?" He yelled. One of the dockmen securing the crates looked back "Nah, can't say there are any. What about it, pal?"

"It's for me wife!" The driver yelled. Salty's interest peaked when he heard that "Did ye get a present for yer wife, driver?"

His driver smiled "Yep, four rather large ones to be precise. M' hopin' she'll like 'em"

"Oh I'm sure she will" the Dockside diesel chuckled. Just then, a chilly breeze swept through the docks, causing Salty to shiver, his frame rattling. Salty's driver exclaimed and kept a tight grip on the handles "Woah, ol' boy! Easy!"

Salty grunted "I get cold, driver. We diesels don't 'ave fur like the steamies!"

The diesel driver sighed and patted Salty's cab "I know, it's not really your fault. It's the winter! Everythin' around you gets as cold as ice, even the sea!"

Carly shuddered "Couldn't have said it better, Chuck! I took a dip in the water to find fish this morning, and it was freezing! My fins felt really numb and sore!" She said, flapping one of her fins "My operator had to hand-feed me fish"

Everyone murmured in agreement, including the Dock manager who was there to listen. The manager then walked over to Salty's driver with a schedule board "Alright, your crate should be here very soon"

"Hmph! It was supposed to be here yesterday!"

"Sorry. Bad sea conditions were causing the delay, I'm afraid" he shrugged before turning heel and leaving. The driver groaned, shaking his head "This damn weather" He muttered under his breath.

Salty let out a small dog-like whine at hearing his driver's dismay. Christmas Eve would be coming soon, so it made sense why the man was grumpy about it "Don't worry, driver. It will be here soon..."

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It was around 2:00 when the workload had thankfully died down, there were less ships coming in to the docks, and Salty had significantly less flatbeds to shunt. So, the cranes were able to get longer breaks and so did Salty, which was a relief! Working was ok, but admittedly a bit harder being one shunting engine short. But other than that, at least they could rest.

However, the peace and quiet was disrupted by a loud ear-splitting BANG!

Salty's whole body arched upwards like a frightened cat, and he even shrieked like one. Cranky, Carly and Big Mickey all nearly screamed at the loud noise, their poor sensitive ears!

"Flare spotted!" Big Mickey's operator yelled, pointing out into the ocean. Everyone immediately looked to where he pointed, and they all gasped in horror – it was a sinking cargo barge, and its crew were waving frantically for help and shouting.

"They're sinking!! Call the bloomin' Search & Rescue centre! Anyone!" The Dock manager barked from his megaphone. A workman spoke up "We can't! It'll be half an hour until they get 'ere in THIS weather! Those men will be down under by that time!"

The Dock manager was silent for a moment before looking up at the cranes "Do you think one of you three could get over there?"

"We would, chuck! But we're all sensitive to icy water! I got all numb and sore from a swim this morning! I was only in for a few seconds too!"

"Well, we need to get those men out of there somehow !"

Everyone murmured uncontrollably, no one knew what to do...except Salty.

Salty hummed thoughtfully to himself "Hmm...it be dangerous" He thought. Even if it was dangerous, SOMEONE has to risk it! Those crew members' lives were on the line. That's it. He MUST do something.

Salty's driver was on the diesel's footplate, nervously squeezing his handle bars when Salty suddenly jerked him off "Wha–?! Salty!" He exclaimed, landing on the ground with an oof.

Everyone watched with surprise as Salty jumped off the rails and went into his beast form. The monster diesel snarled and darted towards the ocean before jumping off the edge with a big SPLASH!

"Salty?!" Cranky and the diesel's driver gasped, the cranes spinned around to see him swimming towards the sinking boat. Salty wheezed and shivered as he paddled through the water, he was going to save those men no matter what!

His three pairs of limbs ached and clawed at the water, his finned tail giving him a boost. The crew on the sinking barge noticed the engine swimming towards them and all cheered and waved for his attention. Salty grunted and growled, trying to shake off the exhaustion as he reached the barge and its crew.

"Climb aboard, mateys!" He shouted hoarsely, the cold water had seeped into his vents. The crew didn't need to be told twice! They all crawled on top of Salty and held on tight as he bobbed about. Once he made sure everyone was one, Salty was about to leave until something caught his eye – something red.

It was the red crate his driver spoke about, floating on a single, small wooden platform. Conveniently, it was right next to him. Salty's eyes widened and without word, he quickly pulled it towards his buffers and pushed it along as he paddled towards the harbour.

Everyone from the docks watched in amazement as the diesel shunter rescued the whole crew "Salty's doing it!" Big Mickey cheered, and everyone followed suit. Salty's driver smiled "Go on, ol' boy". Despite how things looked from their perspective Salty panted tiredly, his body was numb and aching from all the paddling and the workers' small, but added weight along with pushing the crate was not helping.

Finally, the dockside diesel reached the harbour and found a ladder for the crew to climb. As soon as they all got off, Salty was wheezing and straining his breath, the cold was NOT good for him. Black spots were clouding his vision, along with a mild dizzy sensation, the struggle to breathe properly worsened from the water getting through his vents. It was then he soon realised it – this may be the end.

But he didn't fret, he instead smiled and chuckled wearily "Well, at least I did somethin' brave afore I go... har"" then in a flash, everything went black. The muffled yells from above silenced, and everything went numb...

He hoped everyone was safe.

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The darkness seemed it would go on forever. The silence was nearly deafening. But Salty wasn't afraid.

"Do...do you think he'll wake up, Sir?" Someone piped up. They sounded worried

"I can't say for certain, I'm afraid. We'll just have to wait" someone sighed. They sounded a little anxious, but they were also trying to remain calm.

The darkness then got brighter, big and small blobs taking form. Salty winced and watched as the smallest blobs were shuffling about, their shapes soon gathering more detail as the minutes went on.

"Wait...I think he's waking up..!" One voice exclaimed.

"Thank the lord for that..." another sighed, sounding relieved.

"Well? Step back, all of you! Give Salty some space!" The same voice from before boomed. Finally, Salty's vision fully returned, he could finally see where he was;

Salty was in the Dieselworks! A dim light shine over him. Surrounding him were the employees, and in front of him were none other than his driver and Sir Topham Hatt. Both were relieved to see him awake, as it seemed.

"Salty, ol' boy! Thank God you're awake!" His driver cried as he jogged over. Salty smiled "Ahoy, driver..." he replied tiredly, his driver then scratched under the dockside diesel's chin. Salty purred in response and leaned into the affection, his tail softly thumping against the ground. As soon as that was over, Salty asked "So, uh...wha' happened t' me?"

Sir Topham Hatt then stepped forward "You were a really brave and useful engine, Salty. You fainted right after getting those men back on land! Luckily, you were escorted to the Dieselworks as soon as Carly pulled you out, and the employees here spent 3 hours trying to clear out the water from your insides"

Salty's eyes widened "Well, blimey..." he then looked to his driver, and it was then he remembered the red crate. He didn't remember it being pulled up before he lost consciousness "But...I didn' save me driver's crate o' presents fer his wife..." he said in a quiet, guilty voice. Sir Topham Hatt's gaze softened and he looked to Salty's driver, who said "But you did"

"Aye?"

"After you were taken here, Cranky fished out the crate. I can't thank you enough for getting it..." he explained with soft smile. In return, Salty smiled back.

"Salty...." The Fat Controller began "For your bravery, you will be repainted into a colour of your own choice!"

"Oh, thank ye sir!" Salty said happily.

____________________________________________

A day later, Salty returned to the docks in a clean new red livery that would definitely get James feeling jealous. His buffers still had their oil weathering, but he didn't mind at all.

The cranes and dock men welcomed him back, and all congratulated him on rescuing the crew men.

Salty was very glad that day that he saved the crew, and his driver's crate of gifts. But asides from that, he was just happy to be by the sea, no matter how chilly it could get.

"Ooooh.... don't take me away from the sea, boys! Oooh....doooon't take me away from the sea! Harharhar!!"

#thomas and friends #thomas the tank engine #monster engines #ttte salty #ttte cranky #ttte carly #ttte big mickey #short story

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13o7billionyearsinthemaking · 4 months

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Isle of Engines part 17

<-Previous Continue->

#ttte #thomas and friends #thomas the tank engine #ttte humanized #ttte fanart #my art #ttte gordon #ttte Elizabeth #ttte millie #ttte whiff #ttte big mickey #tugs big mickey #web comics

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unpopularvivian · 6 months

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Incorrect Ttte Quotes 28:

Carly: Hey guys, what romance movie are your favorites?

Salty: Arrggghhh! Titanic!

Porter: Princess Bride!

Big Mickey: Yeah, Princess Bride.

Cranky: Don't have any. What's yours?

Carly: *Breathes* Shrek.

#thomas and friends #thomas the tank engine #ttte #ttte shitpost #ttte memes #incorrect ttte quotes #ttte carly #ttte salty #ttte porter #ttte big mickey #ttte cranky

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sirjosh9 · 5 months

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Today's the big day on the Island of Sodor, Mickey Mouse and his loyal dog, Pluto arrived at a station and were waiting for a passenger train to ride. Just now, Thomas the Tank Engine arrived with his faithful coaches, Annie and Clarabel. They're both happy to see each other as they're ready for the adventure of the day on the Island of Sodor.

Mickey: Hey, Pluto! Here he comes.

Thomas: Hello, Mickey and Pluto.

Mickey: Hiya, Thomas.

Pluto: [ Barks ]

Thomas: All aboard on the birthday train.

#thomasthetankengineandfriends #thomasandfriends #thomasthetankengine #therailwayseries #crossover #mickeymouseandfriends #mickeymouse #pluto the dog #plutothepup #mickeys95thbirthday #95thbirthday #Spotify

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mickeymouse-michaelrat · 1 year

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Mickey Mouse 'Michael Rat' is a popular cartoon character who has received cock and ball torture by Spongebob Squarepants. It all happened one day, Michael was coming home from The Vietnam strip club. Mickey noticed that the window had been shattered., he yelled into the house while pulling his minigun "Who's there!" The square like silhouette comes out from the shadows with a lustrous pose. "I'm ready for you". Mickey slowly lowers his minigun as he is blinded by the square's illustrious body. The sponge quickly removes both his and Mickey's clothes. Michael wants to refuse but he just can't, he gets into a playing position as Spongebob takes out the video camera and also the ball stretcher. The sponge quickly fastens the ball stretcher onto Michael. While Mickey was moaning Bluey's Dad and Thomas the Tank Engine immediately bust down the door, the sight of Blueys Dad and Thomas the Tank Engine makes Michael flustered, but then Daddy Hops cums on Michael flying at 75 miles per hour, Cotton Eye Joe suddenly appeared while completely nude. They immediately go into a bus with Ms. Frizzle who has a pair of cock and balls. They all commit cock and ball torture on each other while cruising on down mainstreet, Spongebob cried out to the heavens, "YASSS SLAY QUEEN!" Spongebob after the post nut clarity drives into the White house where they gain former president Donald Trump, Spongebob with the testicle cuff on hand immediately takes Donald Trump's pants off and slaps his thick ass booty, he fastens the testicle cuff around Donald's testicles. The moan attracts Cailou's Dad, he immediately takes his clothes off and stretches Saul Goodman's asshole because Saul is also apparently there too. After the stretching was done, they go back into the Magic and Horny School Bus, Spongebob with his balls hanging 12 feet from his body says "It's time for manhunt" and then Dream falls from the sky with his 17 feet cock with GeorgeNotFound on the tip of his dick while riding Spirit the horse. Spongebob thinks of an idea, he viciously vapes and then Andrew Tate cums in with his big erect forehead and takes the vape away from spongebob and viscously tortures his balls, Bluey's Dad was so aroused that he died of testicular cancer. To replace Bluey's Dad they gain The Rock with his giant booty, and inside the ass of The Rock is Mew which he caught. Mew uses their psychic abilities to make everyone simultaneously bust a nut. The force of the nut made it so the rock's eyebrow comes off his head. The busting of the nut also transferred them into Thanos's asshole, not knowing where they are they kick each other in the dick holes. Thanos feeling irritated in his booty hole snaps his cock in half which causes half of the world to uncontrollably cum so hard they die. Unfortunately half of the CBT crew got cummed to death. Only Mickey Mouse, Spongebob, Cotton Eye Joe, Thomas the Tank Engine, Cailou's Dad, The Rock's Eyebrow, Andrew Tate, Dream from Minecraft are the only ones left alive, mourning the death of their beloved friends they all go to Outback Steakhouse where they order brisket, also the Zodiac Killer was there and chopped all their cocks and balls off. Without their balls they gain vaginas and go to the Vietnamese strip club. And Mickey after all of this thought "Hitler was right." THE END cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum cum

#mickey mouse #disney #spongebob #thomas the train #dream mcyt #cailou #andrew tate #the rock #thanos #there's no way in hell that i'm reading all of that and figuring out the other characters

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gundamcalibarney · 3 years

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Aircraft and Cranes are the only ‘Mech/Robotic like’ Gold Dust beings.

(Height Note: Cranes usually exceed normal human height, both Cranky and Carly are 6’7 and Big Mickey is 7’5)

#core's art #ttte #thomas the tank engine #ttte harold #ttte jeremy #ttte carly #TUGS Big Mickey #Golden Whistle AU #The Height rule excludes Kevin: Who is 5’3 #This is TUGS

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greendreamer · 4 years

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📂 for Gordon, Scotsmans and/or Spencer? And to branch out from Thomas, what about 📂 for Mickey and Oswald?

Gordon - He used to work out almost daily. However, in recent years, he’s been slacking off, coming up poor excuses why.

Scotsman - Spooked by cars. An example would be the moment between him and Ace, he got a big fright from it. Mallard and co. did not let him live it down for weeks! [fantasy!AU]

Spencer - Jealous of Ruth (he has a good reason to) [fantasy!AU]

Mickey - The company expects him to keep in character 24/7. He will get into A LOT of trouble if he breaks character (e.g losing his temper or just express basic emotions beyond the ones in the shorts)

Oswald - The only one of the family not to have any magic. Which might explain why he’s allergic to magic, especially Disney magic ironically.

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laceys-little-space · 3 years

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Shows to watch in Littlespace:

• Peppa Pig 🐷

• Everything’s Rosie 🌹

• Paw Patrol 🐾

• Strawberry Shortcake 🍰

• Fifi and the Flowertots 🌸

• Pingu 🐧

• My little Pony 🐴

• PJ Masks 🎭

• Dora the Explorer 🗺

• Clifford the Big Red Dog 🐶

• Curious George 🐒

• Octonauts 🚤

• Spongebob Squarepants 🧽

• Sofia the First 👑

• In the Night Garden 🌌

• Mickey Mouse Clubhouse 🏠

• Doc McStuffins 🩺

• Thomas the Tank Engine 🚂

• Angelina Ballerina 🩰

• Timmy Time ⏰

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steam-beasts · 8 months

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I always wonder? What happens if you put a engine from another country In to sodor? Does the infection spread to them like the plague or something? I mean this world I'd very strange. Also I imagine morterbike having a deer body

Nia actually exists in the au, and since she's all the way from Kenya, her monster body is a mix between a cougar and a jaguar. British locomotive bodies are a mix between a cat and a wolf's.

As for how the infection would work on a non-sudrain engine, the monster engines are in a way, like zombies. So if they see a non-infected engine, they'll instantly be triggered into a wild, mindless state and bite the engine or ram into it.

For other vehicles like Bertie or Harold, buses will gain stubby little hamster legs and a little bob-tail, becoming hamster-buses. Helicopters and planes like Harold and Jeremy will gain more avian features like feathers. Jeremy, as a jetplane would have his landing gear replaced with talons for snatching up whales. Aviation vehicles would be considered a type of large bird.

Cranes like Cranky and Carly (and Big Mickey) have fish-like features, like large fins going down their support beams and on their heads. So now, if Cranky ever thought things were too much to handle, he could just jump off the docks and swim away...he's a giga fish. A Cranefish...

#thomas and friends #thomas the tank engine #monster engines #ttte cranky #ttte carly #ttte big mickey #ttte bertie #ttte jeremy #ttte harold #ttte nia

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13o7billionyearsinthemaking · 1 year

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Isle of Engines Part 9

(Comeon It's gotta do something right?)

2: Any capsules,net of anything. We need to get him, And quick! Even if it's one of the airy boxes!

...

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dieselstooyou · 2 years

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Hmmm more angst.

#ttte #thomas the tank engine #thomas and friends #art #my art #ttte au #ttte big mickey #ttte angst

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fairysweetheart · 2 years

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kids media that help me feel like a safe baby🍼🌸:

-dora

- blues clues

- arthur

- little bear

- old disney movies

- barney

- caliou

- magic school bus

- old studio ghibli movies

- thomas the tank engine ( + the movie)

- little einsteins

- bob the builder

- max and ruby

- dragon tales

- mickey mouse clubhouse

- clifford the big red dog

- wonder pets

- angelina ballerina

- it’s a big world

- jay jay the jet plane

- Lor

- kim possible

- Aladin tv show

- little mermaid tv show

- totally spies

- old powerpuff girls

- animated tales of the world

- bear in the big blue house

- backyardigans

- winx club

- kelly club

-harry potter

- old barbie movies

most of these are on youtube :) i will add as i think of more

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aion-rsa · 3 years

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Best Movies Coming to Netflix in August 2021

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As quickly as the summer movie season of 2021 seemed to come upon us, it’s already about to begin its long, languid slide through the dog days of August into fall. That’s not to say that theaters won’t still have plenty of interesting fare to encounter, with films like The Suicide Squad, Free Guy, Respect, Candyman and The Night House all on deck. Hopefully the other hideous sequel happening at the moment — Pandemic 2: The Delta Variant — won’t set any of these potential hits back.

In the spirit of keeping August entertaining, Netflix is rolling out a slew of new streaming additions as well, including an underrated Spielberg gem, fantastic teen comedies both old and new, a couple of stoner classics and perhaps the finest film from the canon of one of the modern era’s most revered directors. We’ve rounded up our recommendations below, and hope you stay cool and healthy whatever you’re watching!

Universal

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Beethoven (1992)

August 1

Hollywood in the 1990s was a glorious and furry era when studio executives never met a family movie that couldn’t be improved with the addition of at least one animal character. Beethoven is one of the most successful examples of this winning formula. Directed by Brian Levant from a script co-written by John Hughes himself (alongside Mystic Pizza co-writer Amy Holden Jones), Beethoven is basically the story of how a husband and father, Charles Grodin’s George Newton, feels threatened by the attention his family gives their new dog, a St. Bernard named Beethoven.

George eventually works through some of his issues and accepts the charming Beethoven into the family, a process that comes to a head when Beethoven is dog-napped into an animal experiment scheme run by evil veterinarian Dr. Herman Varnick. (Honestly, the plot isn’t dissimilar to the story in cinematic masterpiece Paddington.) The deep supporting cast includes Bonnie Hunt, David Duchovny, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Oliver Platt, Stanley Tucci, and Everybody Loves Raymond‘s Patricia Heaton. The film’s sequel, Beethoven Second, will also be available on Netflix starting on August 1st.

Dreamworks

Catch Me If You Can (2002)

August 1

As one of Steven Spielberg’s most charming and laid-back efforts, Catch Me If You Can is a breezy and star-studded entertainment. The story is loosely based on the real grifts of conman Frank Abagnale Jr., who beginning as a teenager was able to pass himself off as a pilot, lawyer, doctor, and many other things. But really, this is a cat-and-mouse chase movie between a still baby-faced Leonardo DiCaprio as Abagnale and Tom Hanks as the FBI stiff who hunted him down. It’s all good stuff, with the movie enjoying a light touch and fresh take on Spielberg’s favorite subject matter: fathers and sons.

Warner Bros. Pictures

Deep Blue Sea (1999)

August 1

A shockingly entertaining B-movie about a bunch of genetically engineered super-sharks which break out and take over a testing facility, this is horror silliness at its best with great turns from Samuel L Jackson, Thomas Jane, Saffron Burrows and LL Cool J. Partially shot on sets built around the same water tanks used for Titanic, with animatronic and CGI sharks, Deep Blue Sea is action-packed, schlocky fun from director Renny Harlin (Cliffhanger).

STX Entertainment

The Edge of Seventeen (2016)

August 1

A bit like Lady Bird before there was a Lady Bird, Kelly Fremon Craig’s Edge of Seventeen is an underrated gem that stars a teenage Hailee Steinfeld as a young woman stumbling through an especially awkward time in her life. Steinfeld is terrific in her best performance since True Grit, playing Nadine as a bundle of insecurities, yet still nobody’s victim. Also of special value is Craig’s hilarious and authentic script, which captures the specificity of growing up in the social media age while being near-universal in its accessibility and empathy for a wide ensemble which also includes Kyra Sedgwick, Haley Lu Richardson, and Woody Harrelson.

Paramount

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

August 1

Just in time for the dog days of summer comes one of the best summer movies ever. Relying on charm and sharp characterization instead of special effects for its spectacle, John Hughes’ Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is a truly great teen comedy that follows the easygoing bon vivant (or secret sociopath?) of a high school’s senior class when he decides to take the day off in the best fashion: by faking he’s sick and then guilting his BFF into giving him the keys to his dad’s Ferrari.

Should Netflix’s Pokémon Live-Action Series Explore the Franchise’s Dark Side?

By Matthew Byrd

Never Have I Ever Season 2 Review: This Netflix Teen Comedy Deserves to Run and Run

By Louisa Mellor

It’s silly yet curiously honest stuff about the pressures of young adult life, at least in 1980s suburban America, and a beguiling showcase for an ensemble that includes Matthew Broderick in his coolest role, as well as Alan Ruck, Mia Sara, Jennifer Grey, and a seriously stoned Charlie Sheen. If you haven’t seen it yet, you’re due.

Warner Bros. Pictures

Inception (2010)

August 1 Still Christopher Nolan’s most complete and satisfying film to date (yes, even more so than The Dark Knight), Inception is a cerebral sci-fi set of stacking dolls combined with a rollicking James Bond adventure that all happens to be mostly situated inside one guy’s head. Leonardo DiCaprio leads a team of professional thieves who steal things from people’s minds — only this time they’re hired to implant an idea, even if they have to dive deep into the mark’s subconscious to do it.

Mind-bending imagery and several jaw-dropping action sequences are wrapped around a surprisingly emotional core, with only the usual unwieldy exposition there to remind you that there are some things Nolan may never get right.

Lionsgate

The Lincoln Lawyer (2011)

August 1 Based on a novel by crime writer Michael Connelly, this gripping, suspenseful 2011 drama arguably kicked off “the McConaissance,” a shift from rom-coms to more serious roles by Matthew McConaughey that launched a new, largely acclaimed phase of his career.

McConaughey is formidable as attorney Mickey Haller, a slick lawyer who works out of his Lincoln Town Car and undergoes a crisis of conscience as his new case starts to feel disturbingly like an old one. In addition to McConaughey stepping up his game, this Brad Furman-directed thriller is the kind of character-driven, literate melodrama we don’t see much on the big screen anymore — although we see plenty of them these days on, of course, Netflix.

Paramount Classics

The Machinist (2004)

August 1 Director Brad Anderson followed up his cult classic 2001 horror effort Session 9 with this surreal, Kafka-esque psychological thriller. Christian Bale plays Trevor Reznik, whose inability to sleep leads him to cause an accident at his industrial job that costs a co-worker (Michael Ironside) his arm. Already physically and mentally deteriorating, Reznik begins an even deeper descent as he tries to unravel what’s happening to him and why. Bale is intense and viscerally shocking as the emaciated Reznik, with his riveting performance anchoring an atmospheric, visually striking film that is sometimes an exercise in style over substance.

New Line Cinema

Magnolia (1999)

August 1

Boogie Nights pushed director Paul Thomas Anderson into the spotlight, but it was his massive, sprawling jigsaw puzzle Magnolia that made him into a superstar filmmaker. Following multiple narratives and numerous characters all finally brought together by a climactic storm of frogs, this is high art packed with standout moments.

Movies

Top Gun: Maverick Footage Shows Tom Cruise in Real Jet Behind the Scenes

By David Crow

Movies

Best Modern Horror Movies

By Don Kaye

Tom Cruise is electric as a toxic motivation speaker, Julianne Moore is brittle and tragic as a trophy wife who has grown to love her dying husband, while the burgeoning relationship between Melora Walters’ addict and John C. Reilly’s cop added sweetness and hope to a tale of messed up people and damaged families. Epic.

Sony PIctures

Pineapple Express (2008)

August 1 After its trailer introduced everyone to M.I.A.’s amazing “Paper Planes,” Pineapple Express’s work was already done. It didn’t even have to produce a satisfyingly funny movie on top of that. Thankfully the filmmaking team of Seth Rogen, Evan Goldberg, and David Gordon Green decided to give us one anyway, because Pineapple Express is the ideal of the little-seen-or-attempted stoner action comedy.

Rogen stars as process server and marijuana enthusiast Dale Denton, while James Franco portrays his annoying drug dealer Saul Silver. When the pair witness a murder, they are forced to flee hitmen, a pair of corrupt cops, and worst of all, Danny McBride. The Rogen/Goldberg comedy catalog has very few misses and this one is particularly excellent.

Universal Pictures

Seabiscuit (2003)

August 1

No one would ever accuse Gary Ross’ Seabiscuit of being subtle. With its voice-of-god narration by Ken Burns fave David McCoullough, which helpfully spells out the themes of the movie every few scenes, and its achingly sentimental score and dialogue, Seabiscuit is a Cinderella story which all but asserts its titular race horse ended the Great Depression. Yet Ross captures some of the simple American grandeur of Laura Hillenbrand’s non-fiction source material book, as well as the beauty of this true story where a horse that everyone counted out as worthless was nursed by three men into becoming one of the greatest racing animals of all-time.

It’s the type of feel-good yarn that won people over in the 1930s and which is still winning now. When coupled with a handful of strong performances, including from Jeff Bridges, Chris Cooper, Tobey Maguire, and a seriously underrated Elizabeth Banks, you have a crowd-pleaser that actually pleases.

Paramount Pictures

Team America: World Police (2004)

August 1 Roger Ebert’s one-star review of Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s Team America: World Police sums up the film’s nonsensical political stance nicely. “I wasn’t offended by the movie’s content so much as by its nihilism,” the great film critic wrote.

Rog was right to criticize Team America’s incomprehensible worldview. Nearly 20 years later, its seeming position that Alec Baldwin and Kim Jong-Il are equally bad hasn’t aged that well (despite Mr. Baldwin’s best efforts). But it’s hard to argue that the South Park creators’ nihilism doesn’t lead to some great comedy. The novelty of Thunderbirds-style puppets saving the world amid graphic sex acts and voluminous barfing never quite wears off.

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