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hamletthedane · 10 months

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Love that Oppenheimer is a deeply disturbing horror movie about a man forced to accept that he is, in a person, the representative manifestation of mankind’s evil in committing one of the greatest horrors of human history - LITERALLY acting as the modern Prometheus, tormented by his sins for the remainder of time. Knowing that he will never be pitied and his actions will forever be utterly unforgivable because the blood of genocide and the potential of total human annihilation will eternally drip from his hands.

But also the simultaneous indictment by the film that to blame a single person for the Manhattan Project is to refuse to accept your own capacity for great evil if the ends ever seem to justify the means, and the culpability of every member of a species that lets itself create something so unspeakably terrible.

Hate that twitter’s take on such a nuanced and brilliantly handled examination of those issues is “movie bad because protagonist not evil enough.”

#what’s that quote about the problem with othering the enemy in media is that we can no longer see our own reflection in their eyes #oppenheimer’s motivations WERE sympathetic that’s the POINT #we SHOULD feel uncomfortable with our sympathy for him - the film goes out of its way to make us feel uncomfortable about it #we should be uncomfortable with the fact that we might have made the same decisions as him in his place #yes he’s evil but his evilness represents the evil that we might all accept in ourselves #twitter simply cannot handle nuanced takes on things ig (tumblr does though - the posts on here have been surprisingly excellent)#oppenheimer #(tldr - look if you walk out of Oppenheimer thinking it somehow celebrates the man then you may need to retake 9th grade Literature srry)#films

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 1 month

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Killua and the Power of Wishes

Okay going to try and make this coherent because the amount of wish association all through Killua's character development makes me want to chew plaster.

As a fair warning, this analysis ended up being long as hell, and I didn't even include everything I could've said. This is also just one lens to analyze Killua's story arc with, and I feel there are other valid interpretations of some of these moments. This is just one of mine, so keep that in mind please.

One last warning that this analysis does discuss emotional manipulation and abuse, as is par for Killua's background.

Let's set the stage with one important piece of info: Killua's birthday.

Killua's birthday is July 7th, the same day as Tanabata. Tanabata is a folklore-rich festival where according to legend, the two lovers, weaver Orihime and cowherd Hikoboshi, represented by the two stars, Vega and Altair, are allowed to reunite once a year after separation. A popular custom of Tanabata is to make wishes by writing them down on tanzaku, then hang it on a bamboo tree so that the wish might one day come true.

Tanabata is also known as the Star Festival. Please keep this in mind, because I'm going to come back to it.

To finish setting up the lens for this analysis, I'm going to need to dig into the game-changer scene for Killua's early characterization - his confrontation with Illumi at the end of the Hunter Exam, and specifically, the exact nature of Illumi's manipulation of him.

I say "game-changer" because it really is - up until this point, it's kind of fair to not fully know what to think about Killua. Certainly, he seems excited to hang out with Gon (he approached him first, after all) and he's friendly enough, but he's also arrogant and claims to be motivated mainly by boredom. For all intents and purposes, Killua seems set up to be Gon's dangerous yet charismatic rival... but then this scene happens and it completely turns it all on its head.

Because Killua may have mentioned his family was controlling before, but he seriously downplayed the severity of it - likely because he has no point of reference for how awful his situation actually is other than it makes him feel bad and trapped. Illumi's appearance immediately shifts our understanding of Killua from runaway murder kid with annoying murder family to straight-up victim of emotional abuse, and dissolves his cockiness instantly to terror.

What does all this have to do with wishes? Glad you asked. Let's look at some of Illumi's dialogue.

[ID: A screenshot from HxH episode 20 of the 2011 anime. Killua looks up, sweating and conflicted, as Illumi tells him "You don't want anything or wish for anything." End ID.]

This is the crux of Illumi's (and the family's) control. Killua's desires do not align with the family trade. They must be excised from him.

When Killua insists that he does have something that he really wants, Illumi says "Tell me what it is you want", in a mockery of a certain other sibling who would have helped fulfill this wish - Illumi asks only so he can completely dismantle it. And Killua isn't even really surprised at Illumi's words, just heartbroken. You can tell this isn't the first time this sort of thing has happened.

Killua states his wish quite fervently; he really means it. But his words are not rebellious, nor cathartic. Instead, he answers Illumi quietly, as if fearful or ashamed, almost reminiscent of a sinner's confession.

[ID: Two screenshots from HxH episode 20 of the 2011 anime. In the first Killua looks down with a troubled expression, saying "I want to become friends with Gon...". In the second, his face is hidden as he stands with hands clenched at his sides with a spotlight on him. He says "I'm sick of killing people..." End ID.]

It's such an innocent, simple want.

And Illumi proceeds to make him feel like even something so simple is harmful and selfish of him... not to the family, but to Gon.

In a matter of a few minutes, Illumi breaks down Killua's wish by:

Acknowledging this desire, but twisting it into something that will inevitably fade over time, thereby causing Killua to doubt his own conviction and feelings -> "Gon is a novelty, a radiant presence who has piqued your curiosity. No more than that."

Acknowledging that Gon is someone important to Killua, and undermining this by telling him that by his very nature, he will eventually bring harm to Gon, which makes him feel as though Killua cannot trust himself to be a good friend -> "If you try to be friends with him, you will one day want to kill him... because you are, by nature, a murderer." (As a... delightful... bonus, this is also apparently how Silva and Illumi justify their treatment of Killua to him - "This is the essence of your existence and we taught you accordingly." Like they adapted to Killua's nature, instead of them molding Killua into who they wanted him to be.)

Delivering an ultimatum - to fight Illumi and win, or else Gon will die - that Killua is doomed to fail due to his upbringing and the needle in his head. Since Killua doesn't know about the needle, he assumes this is his own personal failure, something Illumi feeds into -> "You're just not qualified to make friends."

And it's the last point that breaks him. The first two shoot down Killua's present wish, but the last proceeds to shatter any hope he might've had of wishing for anything similar in the future - he has told him that his desires are weak, temporary, inherently dangerous to those around him, and worst of all, aren't enough on their own for him to deserve friendship and love from others. And the clincher: Killua feels like all of this is his own fault, that there is something inherently dangerous and wrong with him!

So, it doesn't even matter to Killua anymore if he fails the Hunter Exam. To him, he just failed the only test that mattered.

10/10 manipulation, Illumi. Fuck you, seriously.

Killua's character arc is mainly his quest and struggle to refute Illumi's arguments and to shake off the manipulation and the ways in which his family have molded and controlled him. And by far, the most difficult part of his conditioning to shake off is this idea that he is undeserving of anything more than what he is already given.

It's almost like the family has drilled it into him that wishes are dangerous. How interesting.

Thankfully, however, there are two parties to Killua's wish here - Gon, too, is a part of it, and it is not simply his reciprocated desire to be Killua's friend that saves him, but also his recognition of Killua's situation for what it is (notably, when no one else correctly identified the true issue).

"You know it wasn't his choice. You manipulated him, kidnapping his spirit!"

The ensuing Zoldyck family arc emphasizes that Gon is 100% correct: the main hold Killua's family has on him isn't physical - it's all emotional.

Killua breaks one of his shackles when Milluki threatens to have his new friends killed, but he only breaks the rest when Zeno tells him he's free to go. So, if Killua could break loose at any point, was this still a rescue like Gon said?

Well, yes - just because he absolutely could've broken out physically at any time, that does not mean he could just leave. That's the nature of situations such as this - it's not as simple as "just leaving". Support is necessary, as is actually having something tangible outside the situation to go to - otherwise there is little point to leaving at all. Gon (and Kurapika and Leorio) showing up to free Killua showed him that his wish was reciprocated and allowed him to break one cuff - this is the start of his journey, but he still has a long ways to go. Notably, he again hesitates and closes off when Silva asks what he wants.

[ID: Three panels from HxH chapter 42. In the first, Silva asks Killua "...would you like to see [Gon]?" Killua's expression is complicated in the next panel - he's closed off and uncertain. Silva continues "Be honest, Kil... what do you want?" End ID.]

Killua will backtalk and casually break his shackles and death glare his family... but he's too fearful to voice his wants aloud.

And once again, asked by his father what he wants, he is subtly set up to fail. His wish is granted, but made conditional - "Do not betray your friends", something Killua is regrettably set up to do by virtue of the needle in his head that he, again, doesn't know about. Silva fully expects him to fail and come back home, disillusioned, believing it's his own fault due to his "nature", and trusting in Silva still as a "reasonable" figure in his life.

This condition placed on his friendship is what drives much of Killua's fear and insecurity with regards to Gon for much of the series - the idea that Killua has to earn his right to friendship, and that if he doesn't, he will lose it, one way or another.

It really makes me wish that Killua had actually gotten to hear Gon's views on friendship from the beginning of the Zoldyck Family arc, because it entirely refutes this entire philosophy. He even outright refuses to go through the Testing Gates at first, purely because he thinks the sentiment of needing to prove yourself just to be friends is completely outrageous - he only relents because there is no other way.

[ID: Two screenshots from episodes 21 and 22 of the 2011 HxH anime adaptation. Gon looks up at Illumi and firmly states "[Killua] doesn't need to earn the right to be my friend!" In the second, Gon's face is seen in profile and close up as he asks "Why would you test your friends?" End ID.]

I doubt it would've truly prevented Killua's insecurity from manifesting even if he had heard this, to be honest - his issues with usefulness are very deep-rooted in his upbringing - but still, it would've been nice for him to hear, I think.

However, that's not to say that this exact sentiment doesn't come through in their interactions.

Gon, as Killua's friend, cares about what Killua actually wants and wants to make sure Killua knows that - and that's part of what makes the Whale Island conversation between them really important.

[ID: Two images, both of the same scene from HxH chapter 64, and episode 37 of the 2011 anime. In the manga panel, Gon has turned his head to look at Killua directly, who looks shocked and taken aback, to say "I like hanging out with you." In the anime screenshot, Gon has turned his whole body to face Killua, and says "I think it's fun to be with you." End ID.]

I see a lot of people chalk this up to just Gon being Gon, but it reads to me as much more deliberate than even his usual honesty. He's turned so he's looking directly at Killua, which is a sure way to make his words come across clearly. The lead up to this is Killua, again, not knowing or being able to vocalize what he wants. He doesn't have a goal to work towards like Gon, he only knows what he doesn't want - he's a mix of envious and admiring towards Gon, who knows what he wants and simply goes for it.

But this conversation makes it clear that they have a shared wish - they both want to be friends, and they'd both like to stay together. It's not about earning, to Gon, it's only about if they both want the same thing - mutual, not conditional. There's a nice almost call-and-response type dialogue here, where Gon asserts that he likes spending time with Killua (very directly lol), then shares that Killua is the first friend his age he's had. This prompts Killua to say that Gon is his first friend ever, and that he does have fun with him. And just like that, Gon replies "Then let's stay together!" and pointedly includes Killua's desire to find a goal in their, now shared, upcoming journey.

Overhead, a shooting star appears in the sky. A mutual wish is granted.

[ID: A panel from HxH chapter 64. The night sky is full of stars. In the centre is a shooting star. End ID.]

Hm. Stars. Remember how I told you to keep that in mind, all the way back at the beginning? Their association with Tanabata, making a wish on a shooting star, etc. etc.?

Well, buckle up because this star is going to make you experience so much sadness now.

[ID: Panels from HxH chapter 286. The first is a conversation between Killua and Meleoron where Killua asserts he intends to "go down in flames with [Gon]". When Meleoron looks concerned, Killua brushes off the declaration as a joke. In the second image, Killua is turned away, his outline pale, as Meleoron thinks "Why... did you looks so sad... back there?" The last image is a cloudy night sky filled with stars. At the centre of the panel is a shooting star. End ID.]

Yeah, it makes its reappearance directly after Killua has "jokingly" resolved to die with Gon if it comes down to it, after "since it means nothing to you".

I am assured, in Japanese, the word choice here is 心中 (shinjuu), the word for double suicide, where the intent is to die at the same time in the same manner in order to be reunited in the afterlife. The implication here is that Killua, having increasingly grown insecure in his place by Gon's side but unable to voice this, knowing that Gon is hurtling down the path of no return, thinks back to their conversation under the stars where they both mutually wished to stay together and, because he believes that it is no longer possible for him to help Gon, has resolved to stay by his side in death, and after it.

...holy shit, kid.

[ID: Two screenshots from the 4th ending of the 2011 anime. In the first, Gon and Killua stand back to back as meteors fall around them. In the second, they stand facing away from the audience towards a body of water under a night sky filled with stars - Gon throws a stone, which flashes in the air like a shooting star. End ID.]

And of course, here's the shooting star again in the 2011 anime's Nagareboshi Kirari ending, as well as it being the subject of the song itself and rather explicitly referencing that wish to go on a journey together, to stay together, because... Madhouse hates us. I guess. :'(

What started off as a simple wish for a friend deepened into a wish to always stay by Gon's side. This is largely good at first! Killua is able to explore and experience genuine friendship, to get a taste for freedom, and use the power of his fervent wish to protect his dear friend in order to rid himself of Illumi's needle. However, the more Killua wants, the more he traps these wishes in monologues within his own head and does not voice them aloud. Part of it is that he already feels he's been given much more than he deserves - seeing himself as a creature of darkness and Gon as light - but a greater part of the issue here is not that Killua is afraid to wish for things, but that he is afraid wishing without "compensation" will inevitably lead to horrible repercussions - namely, losing who he loves.

In order to feel worthy of staying with Gon, of earning his friendship, Killua works hard to help Gon achieve his goals, taking on the role of wish grantor, growing to do practically anything needed to support him for seemingly nothing in return - but that's not 100% true. Killua wants at least some appreciation, whether he admits it or not - it's a security thing, and it also clearly makes him happy, even if he's not great at accepting it. He insists in Chimera Ant arc that friends don't need to thank friends, but this declaration always read as very sudden to me or like a rationalization, and it's relevant to remember that this is at the peak of Gon isolating himself and self-destructing before his eyes, and Killua's own insecurity regarding his importance to him.

Killua might not mind doing things without thanks, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like to hear that Gon appreciates him. He clearly does appreciate verbal confirmation of their bond! We know this.

[ID: Two screenshots from the 2011 anime. The first is from episode 61. Killua smiles down at the ground with his hands in his pockets, the colours having gone soft and bright. The second is from episode 70 during the dodgeball match. Gon smiles determinedly in the foreground as Killua looks shocked next to him. End ID.]

Keeping all this in mind, Killua's story, or at least this part of it, couldn't have concluded in a better way than his rescue of Alluka, the wish grantor.

Now, I could probably write an entire other analysis on Alluka and Nanika alone, but for the sake of not making this any longer than I already have, I'm going to go through only a few points. Alluka is incomprehensible to her family because they make no attempt to understand her, with the exception of Killua. The only thing they do seem to understand, when explained to them, is the demands made after Nanika grants a wish - this, of course, fits neatly into their own predetermined views on "earning" and "punishment". However, beyond this, they make no attempt to understand her, and since her power is deemed dangerous and uncontrollable, she is locked away.

They are worried, first and foremost, that Alluka will bring harm to the family, and there's two ways in which this could be true:

As a function of failing to fulfill her requests, of course

Because she, just by existing, threatens the family's status quo

I stated at the beginning that Killua's desires do not align with those of the family business, and he's always apparently been more open to understanding others - he asks Alluka and Nanika questions to understand them, and treats them with respect, while his family are more so focused on subjugating anything that might be a threat. This is what Illumi tried to drill into Killua after all; never fight a superior opponent - everything is about assessments of relative strength, which leaves no room for open-mindedness or getting to know people.

Faced with a daughter who is clearly incomprehensibly powerful, and a son, the would-be inheritor of the family trade, who is showing a disturbing amount of willingness to befriend instead of retreat from her, the family made the decision to excise Alluka not just from where she could "harm" the family power-wise, but also likely to secure their control over Killua, who they then set about practically programming to not have any more wishes for himself, or at least to not be able to vocalize them without fear of loss or retribution.

The family's nickname for Killua is "Kil" or "Killu", which is deeply fascinating to me as a reader - nicknames are expressions of endearment, typically, and I actually don't doubt that here. Killua's family does love him, but their love comes with conditions. He must be molded into the perfect son, and every part of him that doesn't fit must be excised.

So: Killua's memories of Alluka are suppressed with the needle, and she is further cut from his life by dropping the "a" from his name (the Zoldyck children are named like a game of shiratori - Illumi -> Milluki -> Killua -> Alluka -> Kalluto). The nickname is also like a command or order "to kill", which is of course what they want him to do.

Saving Gon through saving Alluka and Nanika forces Killua to have to face down the last and hardest of Illumi's manipulations to shake, and that's the notion that a wish, that kindness and friendship and love, cannot be unconditional without severe repercussions - where the people he cares about get hurt because of him, something he cannot envision being forgiven for.

It's a little sad to me that after spending most of the series struggling against his family's teachings that they didn't lead to Killua betraying Gon at all, as he'd feared... but to him betraying Nanika, by sending her away.

Here is this little girl with a bloodstained past, incredibly powerful and dangerous and capable of amazing feats, treated as some evil thing by those who fear her. But she is kind at heart. Her true strength lies in healing, not killing. And she only takes commands from Killua.

Illumi thinks this is because Killua is the only one with control over her. Killua believes this is because she wants praise. They're both partially correct, but this is not the full reason Nanika does what Killua asks of her.

[ID: Two screenshots from episode 146 of the 2011 anime. In the first, Nanika smiles and says "I love Killua." In the second, Killua looks at her, stricken. End ID.]

Nanika loves him. Everyone has been trying to figure out all these complicated rules and conditions on her wish granting and why Killua is the one exception, but the answer is exceedingly simple. She loves him, and wants to do nice things for him so he can have his wishes granted. It's the only way she knows to get the love that she wants in turn.

Just like her brother, Nanika makes herself useful to earn love and appreciation from someone who accepted her when no one else did.

Even though he knows Nanika just wants to help, he still sees her presence as a danger to the person he sees as pure and innocent who must be protected. He sends her away because her "nature" is to be a threat to Alluka's safety, even if she doesn't intend to be. Killua's fear of Illumi and repercussions causes him to make a horrible mistake.

And Alluka tears into him for it.

[ID: A set of panels from HxH chapter 336. A furious Alluka glares and asks Killua if he made Nanika cry. When Killua stutters, she demands he apologize to her. End ID.]

You tell him, girl.

Oh hey, this looks a little familiar, huh?

"Apologize to Killua!" says Gon to Illumi after Illumi sends Killua away.

Nanika should not be the one punished for the actions of those trying to control her. She certainly shouldn't be forced to leave those she loves, or have to earn love from them.

And neither should Killua.

[ID: Three panels from HxH chapter 336. Alluka yells, tears in her eyes, "If you're going to protect me... you have to protect Nanika too!!" Killua looks shocked, then his eyes widen. End ID.]

It's interesting to me that this is the line that snaps Killua out of his fear enough for him to properly speak with Nanika and apologize. One party cannot receive all the protection, nor can the other only give and give limitlessly.

Killua makes it clear to Nanika when speaking with her that he will protect her, and that she doesn't need to earn affection from people by granting their wishes. He promises they will both be there for each other - Killua will praise her whenever she wants, and not just when she does something for him, but he also doesn't refuse Nanika's desire to grant his wishes. It's mutual, not conditional.

And on the heels of this "betrayal", Killua asks for what he never thought he could receive - forgiveness. And even though Nanika is clearly still very upset...

[ID: Two screenshots from episode 146. In the first, Nanika and Killua face each other, both of them teary. Nanika says "Kay." In the second, he has pulled her into a hug. Nanika is teary, her fingers gripping Killua's back tightly. End ID.]

...she doesn't even have to think about it.

I do think Killua still has a ways to go, but he is in a position right now to learn from his relationship with his sisters about balance - that love is not just selfless devotion, but also allowing those who love you to help you and make you happy too. I think that's what unconditional love is, in a way - supporting and working together with the people you love to make each other's wishes come true.

#oh my god this was supposed to be a brief write-up what happened 😭#ugh i feel like this is a bit of a mess and there's infinite other little points i could've made or elaborated on or interpreted differentl #but i'm so tired lmao #anyways tldr fuck you illumi you suck #killua is a snarky little shit but he also has so much love in his tiny body and i think we should appreciate him forever and ever #this also accidentally turned into alluka and nanika appreciation. i love them #nanika sweet angel i love you so much i hope you get all the head pats in the world #ghhh i'm so scared this doesn't make sense anymore i've been working on it for almost a week #hunter x hunter #hxh #hxh meta #killua zoldyck #call me ace detective the way i am ace. and also a detective.#storyrambles #also that one scene where gon turns to look directly at killua and tells him he has fun being with him makes me jdfhbvsdjfbvh #he's so intense about it i start laughing. no wonder killua basically just went ??!?!?!?! and like. leaned back because i think i would've #done the same lmaoooo #it's very sweet though :')#argh. gotta post. i need to stop hesitating. let's go.

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localicecreambiter · 3 months

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there's nothing wrong with starting small

woah boy the quality of these are terrible and I really hope they can be read- i'd try and post all the individual panels but I'm not sure if they're going to fit in one post D:

also I apologize for the shadows </3 I could not for the life of me find an angle where they weren't there

enjoy some fluff @sapphicseasapphire (I have videos of close ups if you want me to send them to you :3)

below is all the text from the panels

1. *convinced legend has a death wish*

Ravio: Ok, I'm ready to go home-

Link: You haven't even touched the water yet!

2. R: Touch it? What do you take me for? I'm a merchant of high standard! Not just any water will-

3. *patented pout* *wind picks up*

R: D-Don't give me that look!

4. *deflate*

L: Then get in already!

5-8. *slump*

L: Come on.

9-11. L: If you don't like the ocean-

R: I don't appreciate when you throw me in the moat.

L: Well, now that you mention it...

R: Don't!

12. R: Where are we even going?

L: You'll see.

13. R in the background: Link. So help me- eugh- gimme a sec

14. L: We're here

18. L:Hey... Ravio..

19. L: Hey. You're crying.

20-23. R: Oh. Oh I'M- I'M the one crying.

Weird... Usually this is the other way around.

I think I just missed this.

Missed Link.

24. *Pluck*

L: Hey!

25-26. *toss*

L: Don't even think about apologizing.

You don't like the ocean? Thats fine. We'll start small. Sound good?

27. R: Yeah.

and now some panel close ups of my favorites

sorry for such a long post </3

#my art #loz #legend of zelda #ravio #the legend of zelda #albw ravio #cryptid legend #albw #chain as cryptids au #truly a test of my skills #cannot stick with an art style for the life of me #i like this one though its cute #tldr legend and ravio hike up into a hidden cove to go swimming

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aberfaeth · 16 days

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this is not going to be well articulated but i think the reason i and lots of other people feel a bit weird about certain aspects of tonights ep is that like. the ratgrinders have literally never posed a genuine threat to the bad kids in any aspect of their lives—social, academic, relationships, even their physical wellbeing, any of it. they bodied the last stand, they bodied the dragon fight. the closest thing to a bad thing happening this season was kristen almost getting expelled and that was all bobby dawn who wasnt even a part of the battle! like i genuinely cant relate to people feeling catharsis at the RGs going down bc i was just sat there like. what did they even do other than be kind of a general annoyance and a little bitchy lmfao

#like they wanted to do world ending crimes whateverr thats not PERSONAL yknow!!!#i just wasnt. mad at them. i barely knew them. ivy died and i was like aw. wish she had any lines or a personality other than shit ive made #up in my head #so i could feel Something about this #idk if this makes sense #GREAT BITS THOUGH. EXCELLENT BITS THIS EPISODE #fantasy high junior year #dimension 20 #d20 #fh #c.txt #fhjy #this isnt even a critique at the cast!!! this is just general musings on the nature of stories #esp improv ones #TLDR AT LEAST IF THEY GOT REDEEMED THAT WOULD BE INTERESTING

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14dayswithyou · 1 year

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Okay, I remember you saying smth abt Ren being self aware that he is in a game and he knows mc is not the player who is controlling them. This got me thinking smth.

...Does Ren like the mc or the player (the actual person behind the screen)? I NEED TO KNOW!!

✦゜ANSWERED: Hehehehehehe

This is difficult to answer because it solely depends on the route you take in the game!! If you play the main storyline as intended, Ren will interact and respond to you as if you're an actual character in 14DWY. Buuuut... If you get enough of his dead ends, then he'll interact and respond to you as if you're a real person on the other end of the screen.

Ren is aware that he can manipulate his surroundings, but he doesn't think it's anything out of the ordinary for his world. He's also under the assumption that you/the player = Angel, and he only becomes more and more "self-aware" each time you get his dead ends.

Collect enough of them, and Ren will reach the point where he'll start to wonder if his world is even real.

#Ren's existential crisis speedrun lmao #But tldr: it plays out like a normal otome/visual novel #but the dead ends change the narrative #I won't spoil anything else though!!#💌 — answered.#💖 — about ren.#🖤 — spoilers.#I guess???#It doesn't really spoil much #💖 — 14 days with queue.

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mistyunmoored · 1 year

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now that the shock has died down, I have both good and mixed feelings about a Mercer D20 campaign. on one hand, it was pretty much inevitable after exu calamity and aabria bouncing around everywhere to complete the trifecta, and I think if he has the right cast it could be really magical. d20 clearly wants to have a mix of folks behind the screen for different campaigns, and as they continue to be a huge name in the ttrpg space he was bound to come in. that being said, i don’t really vibe much with cr’s extended campaigns? i’ve tried, but I only really loved exu calamity, which i started watching for obvious brennan and lou-related reasons, and loved because of the tight plot, brennan’s mastery of storytelling, and the cast being laser-focused on it.

this might mean that matt’s style might work much better for me in a shorter campaign. or it could be really jarring and too condensed and weird without him in his usual element with his usual players. idk. i want it to be good, but i don’t think dropout should have teased it in the middle of the current season with JUST matt’s face and nothing else, it leans a little too hard on him as advertising. it’s clearly gonna make a lot of $$ for dropout, which we do always love to see.

#tldr i'm cautiously optimistic but also nervous #you know how people watched legend of vox machina and immediately started watching campaign 1?#i watched lovm and went cool! i have no desire to watch an extended version of that story #i love a good extended campaign but that held no interest for me #though the TRUTH is if a white man was gonna be the next d20 dm it really should have been murph tbh #d20 #dimension 20

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sensitiveheartless · 1 month

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hey i just saw a tiktok video with the horrors comic and i couldn't find any credit (also the comments were turned off ://) and i thought maybe you should know (here's the link to it: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGexd54Qx/ )

Ah, thank you anon! I'm not particularly surprised unfortunately, not the first time it's happened with that comic — sadly I don't think there's much I can do about it, especially since I don't have a tiktok myself. But thank you for letting me know! I do like to know whenever that happens, even if I can't do anything to get the videos taken down. At the very least, it's a reminder that I should really start putting some sort of signature on my comics 😅

...Also, in this particular case the video you linked actually made me laugh when I looked at it, because!! Quick storytime: the last time someone messaged me to let me know that a tiktoker had reposted the horrors comic, I went and looked at it and noticed that the reposter had put two of the comic pages in the wrong order. Somehow NO ONE in the comments had mentioned the fact that the order of events didn't flow right, it was hilarious.

Why is this relevant? Well, because this tiktok you've linked me to has the SAME EXACT MISTAKE, which indicates to me that this new person didn't even steal it from me directly, they stole it from the OTHER REPOSTER and also didn't notice the mistake in page order! The reposters are cannibalizing each other! I am both very entertained and utterly baffled by the lack of effort! They're not even stealing things well!

Anyway, all this to say: I have managed to find the humor in this kind of situation, but I still do not appreciate people reposting my stuff, especially without credit. And general PSA that if you see my comics/artwork anywhere that is not here on my tumblr, or on my AO3 account forest_raccoon, that is not posted by me, and it has been done without my permission.

#tldr; don't repost artist's work! it is not kind #...about this particular case though —#comparing the two tiktok pages really convinced me that that reposter 2 is just stealing from reposter 1 #they've even reposted some comics from artists that are missing full pages and thus do not make sense #similar complaint: reposter 1 also stole the 'wrecking ball; comic I did recently #and they DIDN'T USE WRECKING BALL BY MOTHER MOTHER AS THE BACKGROUND SONG #HOW DO YOU MESS THAT UP #I mean I know people who repost stuff are probably more likely to be lazy (since they're already just stealing other people's work)#but this is on another level to a degree that I kinda just have to laugh #anyway! I'll figure out a way to incorporate a signature into my comics and other than that I'm not gonna worry about it too much lol #not that a signature will stop reposters of course — reposter 1 has several stolen videos that say 'DO NOT REPOST' right on the screen #but at least then anyone looking for the original artist can find it if they want to!#ask box #senhart rambles

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letterlifter · 10 months

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hi mr mailman! i know you arent a part of the writing team, but is there any specific reason why pacesetter and firestarter ended up paired together? you've mentioned both of them having musical/metal inspo, was that part of it? or was it more of just throwing darts at a board? love your work!! <3

thank you!

this is just my personal/non-official/non-lore perspective on it, but I see a lot of character relationships in media that have some obvious shared theme, like fire and water, which is cool… But Pacesetter and Firestarter, despite being seemingly unrelated at a glance, actually have subtler things in common (shared music taste being among them… PS probably enjoys hearing about drama from FS too). their personalities complement each other well despite the visual differences. firestarter needs the confidence; pacesetter needs the appreciation, validation, and probably many other things… maybe he could learn some patience too…

as for the real-world reason why they're in a relationship… well… my memory is bad, but IIRC, it came up a year or two ago... I believe the idea for their relationship existed before either character had a tie to music, back when they just had personalities and designs (which are essentially the same as they are now), so in that way, the initial idea was very personality based

of course the previous paragraphs relate to it, but let’s say this– they told me personally that they wanted to be together

#they kind of make me think of katy and lammy #except the instruments are swapped #tldr: they have a lot of things in common and their personalities work well together #which i think is more realistic in some ways #as for the lore as to why they got together....... not my place to say....... i think there may be some clues out there though #i hope you enjoy the very old ms paint drawings i drew with my mouse

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peachfruitcake · 3 months

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did you hear about what Martin said about Susan and Linda on the Twitter space he hosted on the 27th? i thought of you instantly when he started talking about them and have been waiting for you to post your thoughts! :-)

HEHE YES IM THE ONE WHO’S QUESTION LED TO THAT!!!!!

Now for those who didn’t listen to that space, Martin said that Linda called her to say goodbye but never specified how it went of course. Besides “hey Susan I’m leaving sorry this is really impacting my mental health” “gaaaaaaaaaaey”/j

This is all a personal headcanon but I like to think that their friendship grew incredibly distant ever since Linda married Felix, Susan probably stopped talking to her altogether for a while and it would leave Linda very confused and upset. They might’ve started talking to eachother again a little bit as the series of events began to approach but only very brief small talk, maybe Linda complaining a little and giving Susan a few life updates and them both talking about stuff they’ve been noticing with others lately (especially Felix’s drinking), but nothing deeper than that.

I see Susan being extremely emotionally closed off to most people except maybe a select few that she knows very closely, so if you were to ask her what’s going on in her life she’d give you a very vaguely watered down version and not what’s actually going on or how she’s really managing herself emotionally.

So basically she used to be more open with Linda, but during that period she sort of just started treating her like a stranger.

So when Linda called her first to tell her that she’s finally leaving, Susan acted how she usually would, keeping it calm, understanding and respectful and wishing her luck, but she won’t really show any more than that. Or that she cried later and felt pretty bad that they couldn’t be so close anymore and that she’ll probably never be able to make up for herself acting so distant for the past many years again.

Of course this all comes from how I view Susan as a character myself though and also the fact that I refuse to pass up the idea that she has feelings for Linda. I like to think that she introduced her to Felix cuz Linda was getting more desperate to find a relationship and Susan was getting weird thoughts so in a panic she shoved her off to him so she could avoid the urges. They’ve been boiling within her since highschool and she always was able to push them aside or excuse them as “she’s just my very close friend I don’t have many close friends so she feels extra special” and as the years went by they began distracting her a lot from her work and were growing stronger and more unavoidable aaand they were really beginning to affect how she’d interact with Linda and you see Susan hates feeling like another has any control over her and Linda just wouldn’t shut up about hooooow badly she wants a relationship and hoooow many dates keep failing and Susan was at the point to where she was starting to get the kind of dreams that make you stare up at the ceiling in horror when you open your eyes in the morning so one day when she overheard Felix speaking about being single and wanting to start looking around, she decided to introduce her to him. Susan allegedly never finds a problem she can’t fix in some way so that was her solution.

They hit it off, Susan’s solution isn’t working for some reason cuz she doesn’t feel any relief at all and in fact feels worse but just sucks it up and just focuses on her work and looks the other way. Linda and Felix get married, Susan feels like throwing up the entire day and now feels somehow even more worse by now and suddenly whenever Linda wants to chat she’s suddenly always “busy” every time. Susan’s often busy anyways but you know yourself when there’s a difference between “shit I’m busy that day, let’s do Sunday instead” and “Sorry I can’t, I’m busy”, “I don’t know when I’ll be available.”

While Linda and Felix were dating, Susan probably assumed that she was just jealous that she couldn’t have a little fun at her age herself. When they got married, Susan told herself that she’s probably so depressed over it cuz it’s making her feel like she’s fallen behind others her age and that maybe she feels bitter that all of these people are moving on and going through these important life stages while she remains behind. Which made no sense otherwise cuz Susan couldn’t give any less of a fuck about starting any sort of family or going out. But that’s what Susan would tell herself that she feels so she wouldn’t have to think about it any further. By the time Susan thinks she’s over whatever it was, she begins having brief talks with Linda occasionally. Not often and still a bit distant, but way better than before.

So yeah can you imagine how shitty and guilty Susan felt that whole time of her weird bitterness toward Linda being in a relationship and not being able to approach her much anymore or how Felix turned out to be such a shitty husband.

If this headcanon is aligned with twf’s canon, she’d probably be dead before she even gets to actually acknowledge and accept her feelings as they are. Such is life though. Not like she could’ve done anything about it.

#tldr Susan is emotionally stunted as fuck and has no idea how to identify her emotions and struggles a lot with strong emotions. she’s the #poor bastard type to stand there light a deer in headlights whenever someone cries around her #you ask her how she feels and she doesn’t react on the outside and is like ‘it’s cool’ but deep down she’s falling to her knees and crying #plus she’s a busy woman and got no time for gay shit like pining #idk if u wanted that whole hc ramble but take it anyways (˘◡˘)#it’s cool that you thought of me though!!! means a lot I like it when I’m the first someone thinks of when it comes to susan Woodings :^)#now if you’ll excuse me my sleep gummy is kicking in #the walten files #twf #sulinda #twf sulinda #twf susan x linda #the walten files susan x linda #linda thompson #susan Woodings #headcanons #I remember after Martin announced them being school friends and that Susan introduced her to Felix I made a post mentioning how I see her #haven done that to push Linda away so she could avoid her attraction fo her and how that blew up in her face lol #and he liked the post heehee obv I know that that doesn’t mean it’s canon but it is to me 😁😁😁😁🌼#i stg if this is incomprehensible to read #I’m too tired to proofread and I just wanna post this lol

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wond-las · 1 month

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Gang I fear I'm not loving what they're doing with the aesthetics of this show. They de yassified Muthr. But at the same time Rovender looks great so there's that at least. But what I'm really confused by is the fact that they spoil one of the biggest twists on the first book in the press release????

#im lowkey unimpressed 😭😭#Alan Tudyk is playing Cadmus though so thats pretty cool #tldr im feeling very mixed emotions #wondla #the search for wondla

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royalarchivist · 10 months

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Richarlyson: [ What happened? ]

Roier: Richarlyson, I'll tell you what happened, ok? I'll tell you what happened. What happened is... Quackity was murdered, he was murdered by Maximus and Badboy because they thought it was the best decision, but...

Son, sincerely, I don't think it was, because Quackity is now very angry, and we know that Quackity is– well, I know at least, that this Quackity is not my carnal, he's not the friend I know. Everything is very strange.

Richarlyson: [ Is pa Quacks dangerous? ]

Roier: I think that right now he is, that's why I was going along with him, because... I had this feeling that maybe it was actually him. You know? But now, with the way everything has happened…

Richarlyson: [ Like a friendly feeling? ]

Roier: Yes. It kind of felt like it was him and everything was fine, and we were friends– and we are! But now he's mad, and I don't know what he's planning to do. I'm afraid for your life, and everyone else's, because everything is surely going to go to hell. I'm sorry Richarlyson. It's hard.

Richarlyson: [ I'll be fine, pa. I have you and my other papas on my side. ]