It happens at lunch. Tommy suddenly chokes on his drink. Steve pats his back, laughing at Tommy's red face when he gets his own spitefulness returned to himself. He stares at Billy and swallows his sandwich the wrong way, starting to cough.
It's the end of March and way too cold outside. Despite that Billy wears a crop top, showing off his blond happy trail and abs that are still tanned as if they're in California.
Carol sighs, putting on new lipstick. "Jesus, you guys are hopeless. Hey Billy!"
She waves at him. Billy gives her a short nod before setting down his tray next to her.
"What's up, losers?" He grins and it's like the sun has just risen inside the cafeteria. His nails are painted black, Steve notices absently. The crop top reveals so much of Billy's skin and for the first time Steve realizes that Billy's got freckles everywhere.
"Earth to Harrington," Billy says, clapping his hand in front of him.
Carol laughs so hard there are tears in her eyes and judging from Billy's pissed off face it's not the first time he addressed Steve.
"What?" Steve asks dumbly. From the corner of his eyes he can see Tommy's dreamy expression. At least he's not the only one who has gotten a bit distracted.
"Boys are so stupid," Carol wheezes. Billy glares at her, but there's a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
"You wanna hang out after school?" Billy says slowly like he's not sure Steve is listening. But Steve is listening. It's just that Billy is so distracting.
Carol kicks him under the table.
"Fuck," Steve groans.
Billy tilts his head, raising a brow.
"I mean yes," Steve says, neck burning.
"Cool," Billy answers, leaning a bit closer. "We can also do your idea," he whispers.
Steve's mouth hangs open. Carol clutches her belly, shaking with laughter. Billy smirks.
The bell rings. Tommy blinks. "What's goin' on?"
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OUTBROTHERED chapter 5: Billy gets more than he bargained for when he elects to drop off the catering at a local tech convention.
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It had to happen. Billy knew that. But why so soon?
Just after sex, still stretched out on Steve's bed, toes tingling. Billy wants a cigarette, but he also likes to watch Steve's flushed skin and listen to his ragged breath, satisfaction purring inside him.
"I wanna ask you something." Steve swallows hard.
Billy's heart sinks.
"Are we… a couple?" It's more a breath than a question. Steve watches him with his dark eyes, brows furrowed.
Billy isn't a boyfriend. He's a flirt, a fling, temptation and sex, but he's not love and hugs and cuddles. He has never been that. He's a dirty secret for a while, like a magazine hidden away until you forget about it.
Billy tries to imagine it. Kissing Steve at Skull rock, going on a date, eating ice cream or whatever. The thought is too bright for his mind. He blinks.
"I… don't date," he says and each word aches, because Steve looks so unsure, so hopeful and so fucking vulnerable. So easy to hurt and that's all Billy knows: hurting and getting hurt.
He looks away, because he doesn't want to see Steve all sliced open, because Billy is a coward, just like his das always tells him.
"Oh." Steve pauses. The silence strangles Billy. He should go, leave and never come back.
"Why?" Steve asks after a while.
Billy opens his mouth, waits for an insult, a scoff or something bitter to jump off his tongue, but he can't find the words.
How can you explain to the sun that you can't see it shine at night?
"Do you wanna be my boyfriend?" Steve is so close, Billy can feel his breath against his cheek. If he turns around, he could kiss him.
"I don't date," Billy repeats, his voice gravel.
Steve's nose brushes against his face.
"I want you to be my boyfriend," Steve whispers.
Billy chokes on his own heart.
"Okay," Billy breathes. He feels like a thief, taking what doesn't belong to him.
There's a hot tear running down his cheek. Steve kisses it away and wraps his arms around Billy.
Maybe the sun does shine at night.
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Billy, who is still overcoming his internalized homophobia, takes a small but necessary step to overcome it by introducing Steve to other people like: “Hey, nice to see you again — this is my Steve.”
And Steve, who is so overjoyed every time it happens, he has the biggest grin as he shakes the other person’s hand because he is Billy’s Steve.
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