Everything is free mayakuro real estate. (ty @mikisayaka for letting me steal the typo)
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I imagine a modern AU scenario where Vanilla is invited by Strawberry Crepe to play some video games and is interested to buy some for him and his wife, but the catch is that he is literally so. God. Awful. At almost every single genre there is to the point where it pisses Crepe off so the only kind of games he bought are farming sims. Just straight-up, farming sims. Not even a different kind of cozy game, though Crepe tried to gift him a few puzzle and rhythm-based ones just to add some variety to his selection, but it still isn't too effective because that old geezer sucks THAT bad.
(P.S. I'm not implying that farming or life sims are for losers I'm just saying that PV would definitely pour hours onto his Animal Crossing island or something)
White Lily on the other hand... I imagine her having a bit more tech literacy than Vanilla somehow (being the smart one and working as a scientist and all) and is a literal god at puzzle and rhythm games for some unknown reason to the point where even her own husband and the other Ancients find her terrifying. Not a single breathing person knows how she reached that level of skill, and that's only the icing on the cake of how eccentric of a cookie she can be. That sopping wet cat...
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My tav Cinna is so funny to me because like...
I have A LOT of tavs: a refugee from Menzoberranzan with incredible sorcery and a hundred years worth of arcane knowledge, a girl who hunts bad guys for a living, a hardened criminal who spends his days running from Fist and fighting anyone against him, and a girl who grew up on the streets and had to fight to survive. ALL my tavs are experienced in fighting.
EXCEPT FOR CINNA!
By the time the nautoloid captures her, she's still a sorcerer-in-training. She's never fought any monsters, she's never been in charge of anybody, she's never even left the Upper City of Baldur's Gate! And she's never been outside her family's manor without a chaperone!
She has absolutely no clue what to do or what she's doing.
But for some reason, Shadowheart, Gale, and Astarion look at this helpless little dork who has no idea how she even managed to crash the nautoloid and they're like:
"Aw, yeah. That's our leader. We should put her in charge."
Lmaooo in a few short moments she went from a novice, to the leader of the most powerful pack you've ever seen.
A vampire, a Githyanki fighter, a Sharran cleric, the Blade of Frontiers, the Fury of Avernus, the Wizard of Waterdeep, the Archdruid of the Emerald Grove, and even the High Harper Jahiera and the Stone Lord Minsc, all follow the orders of this mousy young sorcerer who keeps accidentally summoning mephits in combat.
Its even funnier when the Archdruid Halsin and the Wizard of Waterdeep witness this foolhardy girl accidentally polymorphing into a sheep after trying to cast Speak With Animals and they're like:
"Gods, I want her."
The only thing standing between the cult of the Absolute and the life of everyone and everything in the realms, is a 22 year old half-elf that shoots fireballs when she sneezes. With the power of puppy-dog eyes and tism rizz, she manages to lead a pack of heroes to victory and defeat a netherbrain. And somehow nobody but her is surprised by this.
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I like to imagine that Ingo, in Iced Tracks, has to deal with a panel of advisors, as royalty so often seems to have to do.
Anyway, this is fine for the most part. A bundle of them keep trying to get him to hook up with some foreign princess to strengthen ties between regions, which is... understandable.
The problem comes up when Zisu enters the scene as a royal guard and Ingo is entirely enamored with this very much not royal woman.
Cue half of his council trying to encourage him towards maybe seeking romance elsewhere, maybe see about any princesses or widowed queens you could wed, your Majesty; your brother is courting the third-oldest Kalosion princess and she has three sisters, perhaps you could consider courting one of them (please)?
Meanwhile Ingo is just looking at Zisu and thinking, "Very beautiful. Very powerful."
(Zisu has been terrible for the council's average health, she keeps kidnapping Ingo during meetings with the excuse of him needing sunlight and rest because he works too hard)
(Spirits him off to some corner of the gardens for the rest of the afternoon)
In short, the advisors are thinking about strengthening ties with Unova and other regions, and Ingo is just deeply in love and is completely ignoring such matters.
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