kishimoto might have been a mostly bad writer but he kinda went off with Breaking The Cycle as an overarching theme of the whole series

How would you have the canon pairings in naruto get together if you had total creative control? :00

THEY ALL LITERALLY JUST NEED TO *TALK* 😭

Naruto and Hinata needed to interact more, and Neji should not have to die for them to have a reason to finally talk again. (I mean interact throughout the whole series, from part 1, and also after Hinata's confession!? Pls!!)

Sai and Ino would both have to be introduced as their own people from the start and not Sakura/Sasuke's substitutes/foils and also talk to each other. I love them both and it felt like they were just "the spares" for sasusaku! ;-;

To suggest anything for Chouji and Karui I'd first need to now how did that even happen. When did they even meet? Did they ever talk??

Shikamaru and Temari are okay? Better than the rest at least, but as a character Shikamaru still needed to learn to treat women better by the end of the series and I cannot see how someone like Temari of all people would ever go along with that. Other than that they're fine.

Finally Sasuke and Sakura? Oh god I would need Sakura to get over her crush!! So that they could start over and Sasuke could have the chance to earn her feelings back properly. I like to think how the scene where she fails to kill him could have been useful for that if, instead of hesitating because of her feelings, she hesitated because she was afraid to end what team 7 once had and also because it would hurt Naruto. After the war they could go back to how it was as genins, but now as actual friends and then I could see the relationship develop.

In conclusion: Details aside, they all needed more interactions!!

This is your idea of a Hokage?

If you couldn't tell by the title, this is an anti Sarada post, keep scrolling if you're not into that

Let's begin with the outfit:

ok, so the pose is just… she looks like a wanna be prostitute. Sakura didn’t even dress this way when she was OLDER than Salad, let alone when she WAS her age.

let’s start with the heels. even Tsunade didn’t wear heels that high when she, too, was OLDER than Salad. how can she fight in those? I’m surprised she hasn’t hurt her ankles yet.

those gloves… I have nothing to say about them, they’re normal.

her miniskirt tho, ewww! she has nothing to show at the bottom, but in the Chunin Exams arc, when she stopped when Bolt was attacked, you could see her fucking underwear. it just me hard moving in that ugly ass miniskirt.

the top, oh my god. what if she had a chest? it would be revealed.

her hairstyle too. that is the most disgusting hair style in the entire series.

the glasses, oh don’t get me started. they suit Karin, but Salad, it makes her look even more disgusting and I didn’t think that was possible.

with this design, at least she’s modest (not that much tho). I still stand corrected with her hair style and glasses 🤮.

I have so many things wrong with her timeskip design.

her hairstyle is a lame copy of Bolt’s. she tried and failed.

the outfit! It’s going to fucking fall off her. I’m just waiting for her to be in battle and it to just slip down and show her chest (not that she is one) and it will only be connected at her waist and lower. it also must be uncomfortable moving with such short shorts.

the jacket is a BIG no no. it’s gonna fall off her shoulders. it also looks like a bad copy of Bolt’s jacket, like her hairstyle. she admires Bolt so much that she’s a cheap copy of him (🤢🤮).

her shoes, oh my god. they, too, look like they’re about to fall off. how can she fight in those ugly things? I can’t wait for her to be in the middle of battle, trip in those ugly heels, fall face first on the ground, and break her glasses.

she’s inappropriate (this is probably the biggest board):

there’s plenty more scenes, but I just couldn’t fit them.

she’s always hiding behind people’s backs:

there’s so many more and let alone all the ones in the anime, but I couldn’t fit anymore on there, but there’s so much more.

like, can’t she defend herself??? some Hokage she is gonna be. if she’s like this then I want Iwabe as Hokage.

her Sharingan/Mangekyou awaking was the dumbest and lamest thing in the whole Naruto universe:

she’s rude to her “friends”:

she hit Bolt and drags him and shouts at him. she ditched Mitsuki because he was Orochimaru’s son. she spent an entire arc crying for a dad, and when she got one, she was rude and mean to him. she wanted to ditch Sakura because she thought she wasn’t her mother. she was rude to Kawaki and said he should use his past to justify his actions, which is ironic consider she has done the same thing.

her personality:

don't even get me started

she's a crybaby

she thinks she's oh so good yet needs saving

Mary Sue

rude to people

underestimates her enemies and ends up needing to be saved

overestimates her abilities

constantly belittling Boruto for the tiniest things even tho he's BETTER than her

always shouting

picking fights with anyone

she's dumb

I could go on and on.

she’s such a crybaby:

she cried when she first met Sasuke and he didn’t even show any emotion, goes to show how little he cared about her. she cried when she couldn’t bring the dummy fish alive. she cried for no reason when she questioned Sasuke about her mom. and she cried for no reason when they were fighting Shin.

at this rate, she’s becoming more and more of a lame and useless girl with a boring backstory. I hate her, her looks, her personality, and her in general.

my concerns for her at that she’ll never amount to anything, she’ll go blind by 20, maybe 18, she won’t achieve her dream, she’ll become the most hated character, she will get killed off. I have so many concerns about the direction this character is going.

enjoy Salad’s real face:

I hate that out of nowhere, a bunch of people are calling Kakashi a fraud. Saying that "he never lived up to his hype" or "he copied more than 1000 jutsus and only used 3" or "he never had a w", It's something I don't understand, because they never told us that he was the strongest, and also the fact that he always faced the most powerful even without having large amounts of chakra and a kekkei genkai. It's stupid to think that he's being slandered for facing Itachi, Pain, etc. and not winning, as if it were a shame, when they are the strongest and even so Kakashi gave them a fight and made them sweat.

I also hate that all this comes up because they always compare him with Gojo (that is, the strongest in his manga) and the fans don't know how to defend without hating Kakashi for no reason.

Sorry for bothering you with this😔😔

Never had a W? Did they watch him whoop Zabuza and almost kill him until Haku showed up to take the hit? Did they miss that he was fighting Kakuzu without using the Mangekyo sharingan at all? Did they just not watch any of the war arc where he was constantly kicking ass and leading a whole devision???

Gojo is (from what i inderstand) an all powerful character who legit could not be beat and had to be written out by having him sealed away

Kakashi is an incredibly powerful shinobi known for his versatility in skill and intelligence but never painted as ‘unbeatable’ which i think is cool. He’s an exceptional shinobi but he cannot win them all and that’s awesome. It allows other’s to shine without Kakashi being stomped on (like Konohamaru is in Boruto). Even when Kakashi does lose it’s against impossible odds (pein is legit stated as a god like character where as Kakashi is not, and Pein STILL felt threatened enough to have two pein’s fighting Kakashi at once)

With Itachi there’s only one fight itachi won and that was the first one when Kakashi came in unprepared because he didn’t know shit about the sharingan and Itachi (rightfully) used his MS to put Kakashi under a genjutsu that no one except Sasuke could eacape. Like, that alone tells you how much of a threat Kakashi was to Itachi. Itachi put Kurenai (a genjutsu specialist) under regular genjutsu. He whipped out his MS and exhausted himself to take Kakashi out right away instead of risking an actual battle.

Their second ‘fight’ (stated this way since Itachi was not really there and there was no winner on either side) Kakashi tricked Itachi into putting a shadow clone into a genjutsu using his MS (it was the exact same genjutsu but Kakashi was preppared this time and tricked Itachi).

Kakashi is also a character who talks about teamwork a lot and he doesn’t just talk about it, he lived it. He fights with his students. He fights with his friends. He does not take everything onto his shoulders and fight alone like naruto and Sasuke. He is also very aware of his skill level, telling Naruto he needs the back up against itachi but also being the dude who predicts ‘certain death for the 50 nobodies’ in Kakashi retsuden when Nanara asks him how a fight with the sixth hokage vs fifty shinobi would end (and he was right. They didn’t die but he demolished 50 shinobi without breaking a sweat)

Anyone talking like this about kakashi 1) is probably someone who only likes over powered characters which i personally find boring af cuz there’s no risk 2) is just lying. Kakashi win’s all the time and is a little shit in a fight and that’s the best thing about him. He’s not the strongest but he is strong and with his strength comes a certain level of arrogance when he knows he’s going to win.

Man faced Hidan with nothing but a Kunai and wasn’t even really sweating. Kakuzu was more of a threat but again, not enough of a threat for Kakashi to even use the MS

As for the ‘never used 1000 jutsu’s’ like… how is that the characters fault? Kishi decided to always have him spam Chidori instead of showing his 1000+ jutsu. Kakashi retsuden is fun for me because we get to see him use all diffrent sorts of jutsu so anyone who wants to see Kakashi’s range of skills i highly suggest his books because they portray his diffrent skills so very well.

In short: i suggest ignoring people who say that kind of thing. They clearly watched/read Naruto with blinders on and didn’t actually care to pay attention to anyone but their fav. I mean, they’ll probably talk up how strong sasuke is and never address the fact that he took a lot more L’s than Kakashi

And for those who think Kakashi lost all his battles

Kakashi vs Zabuza: Win (Haku saved Zabuza)

Konoha crush: defeated 21 enemy no sweat and then a draw (Kabuto ran for it) against Kabuto

Sent away during the sasuke retrieval arc

Ripped off deidra’s arms and sent him running for it (naruto was also facing him so is that an L for naruto? Or do people just ignore it?)

Kakashi vs Kakazu: interupted, but kakashi destroyed two hearts, three with shikamaru’s help and his work

War arc: defeated multipule enemies including the seven deadly swordsmen

Kakashi vs obito: draw

Team seven defeating kaguya? Managed because of KAKASHI’S plan

Kakashi is also a big reason Gai was able to hit madara while using the eighth gate of death. He kamui’d away a piece of Madara’s protective sphere and gave Gai an opening to actually strike and nearly kill madara

2.- was sasuke right? || 3.- were naruto's intentions with sasuke selfish? || 8.- show a screenshot of your latest draft with no context ((always gonna pick the excuse to see sneak peeks lol)) || 14.-openings or endings?

For the Controversial Naruto Take Ask

2 - was sasuke right?

I'd like to preface this by saying I find it utterly insane how everyone (in canon and also a bit in the fandom tbh) says stuff about sasuke needing to atone for his crimes and whatnot when he literally has never killed anyone in the whole series. Even Naruto has, and he hasn't. And it's explicitly said that he has gone out of his way not to, and that he has asked Taka not to either while they were working for him. So, of course, the whole barging in at the gokage summit thing was not very cordial, but compared to what most of the characters have done, he's pretty fine. (Kakashi kills a child in the very first arc, may I remind everyone.)

Anyway. If the question is "Was Sasuke right about wanting a revolution and to take down Konoha's government?" I mean. Yes, I think that genocide is bad and that states that have been built in a way that allows and, furthermore, have flourished on them, should be undermined. I don't know if he was going to have a plan for that that would have led to something more functional to be built, I'll give you that, but yes Homura and Koharu should have died in a jail cell decades ago.

The part where he went full "I am going to become an eternal god hated by all and ruling by fear" was probably ill-advised though.

3 - were naruto's intentions with sasuke selfish?

That's an interesting question because I've never thought about it like that? I think that one thing happening in their dynamic is that they have very similar problems and trauma, but very different ways to react to it. And so they can relate to the other's motivation, but tend to think "but you are being mistaken about the solution because I know how to solve this and it's not that". But the truth is they are both traumatised teenagers willing to literally die for attention and a feeling of accomplishment and purpose, so I don't think either of them really has it figured out 😭

I don't think that Naruto's intentions with Sasuke were selfish, in the sense that I think he genuinely was doing what he was doing with the belief that it was the right way and that it would help and save him (which, for a part at least, it did). But maybe it was selfish in that he wasn't able to consider that because just he is seeing one path out of his problems and pain, then that path has to be right for Sasuke as well. To consider that he was a different person who maybe needed to make different choices and that's okay.

Not to do my self-promo but actually yesdo this authors, it's good: this is part of what I wanted to explore in Take You Heart Above The Water. Sasuke cannot (and as a matter of fact, in canon, does not) come back to Konoha and integrate into it the way Naruto does. And it's not necessarily a good goal for him to have. They have different relationships with the village, the people, different needs, or maybe similar ones but different ways to meet them. Helping people grow and feel happy and loved doesn't always mean helping them have the same life as you do.

8 - show a screenshot of your latest draft with no context

The last thing I worked I just posted it, so I'm going to take sneak peek of the last WIP I've worked on. It's All Bones and a Beating Heart, my ShikaChou modern AU.

The breaks in his voice takes him by surprise like a tide rising while one’s looking away, only catching back their attention when the cold water reaches their feet. The admission he’s about to make has been building in the back of his mind for weeks, unspeakable but unshakable too, feeding on him like a parasite that will now gush out through his throat after having overgrown his guts, and there’s nothing he can do to stop it. His lashes stick with tears when he blinks and his lips are dry when they part. “I don’t want anything in me anymore.”

Fun times 👍

14 - openings or endings?

I'm gonna say endings just for Nakushita Kotoba.

Thank you for asking!!

I have several questions in just one ask for you.

I think sakura is a fujoshi too lmao did u see her reaction to the boy on boy action? Idk about hinata, but as u said she n sakura forced sasuke and naruto to marry them, even though hinata knows too little of naruto to know hes gay.

naruto and sasuke love each other,there was no one around in sasukes confession, why not say, hey i like you in 'that' way, usuratonkachi? Just confessing, no need to start dating yknow.

There are lots of gay portrayals in shounen now, it wasnt there b4. So kishi couldve let it out anyway right? In interviews and all, but no he has to label them as more bros than blood bros, spitting on the subtle purpose of his story, making his audience get it wrong. Whats the point of writing a love story when hes giving gods word that it is a story about two brothers?

Why WHY did he have to make them reincarnated brothers?

thats all, have a good day sneeze! Sorry if i loaded u up, but i see longer asks sent to u, so it wont be a problem right?

Hi. Hope you have a good day as well. Long ask isn't a problem.

1) Sakura is not a fujoshi, just a hormonal boy crazy girl. I have talked about it here.

2) It's not really a confession, it's Sasuke's thoughts. It doesn't matter whether anyone was around Sasuke's confession. Because the point was that Kishi could not have made his main characters confess their love explicitly in the manga. But it doesn't matter, because he did so much else. SO MUCH. And that is enough. Anyway, the ending was supposed to be tragic so as to facilitate the story line of Boruto, as in with the new generation kids. Naruto and Sasuke were never supposed to end together once Boruto went on board. If it weren't for Boruto, it would have been open ended, and the takeaway/impression would have certainly been that they did end up together. So you can take some comfort in that, but if you can't, I will understand.

3) Most people feel miserly about that one interview where Kishimoto called them blood brothers. But ignore the nuance of the whole piece.

Look how much he is struggling to explain their relationship. The interviewer was being quite assertive about getting his answer too. I am telling you, Kishi was sweating balls here. He couldn't have revealed the actual nature of their bond, and like I said, a lot of people can tell what the story was about. Like this interviewer. Who is being cautious but smart. Kishi is talking about loneliness and abandonment. Both Naruto and Sasuke suffered from it. Kishi finds it hard to put in words but he is trying to explain the underlying feeling of it anyway. It's not hard to see.

Look at this. Don't you find it weird that there is SO damn much conversation around defining this relationship? It's there in the manga in a major way and it's there in the interviews because that's what the manga is about. Kishi is explaining how some bonds are taken for granted because they already have quite a strong impression in the intuitive memory of the audience. Like bonds of family. Like Sasuke and Itachi. You can tell in a story who is family. But the bond between Naruto and Sasuke is hard to explain no? Even Sasuke wants to know the answer! Lol. And he gets it, in the end. Friendship is hard to explain, he says. And yet a lot of characters were pointedly portrayed as friends. Like Shikamaru and Chouji. Properly emphatically friends. Kakashi and Obito. Jiraiya and Tsunade, Inoichi and Shikaku, Lee and Neji, Ino, Shikamaru and Chouji.

All FRIENDS. And we got it very easily too. What he found difficult to explain was the 'friendship' between Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto keeps calling him friend. But obviously, Sasuke isn't satisfied. Again, until the end. Like the audience can obviously tell that when Naruto goes absolutely berserk at the mere name of Sasuke, or that Sasuke gives up his life for a person he didn't even like apparently, yeah that stuff is beyond friendship. Audience isn't dumb. Well not all.

One doesn't really have to go interview hunting to find the veracity of Naruto and Sasuke's love. It's all in the manga. It's the real source. But if you have to refer to the interviews, don't ignore the rest of them.

Everything depends on how Kishi is able to put their relationship into words. Hmm. He did. He didn't have to make them say 'I love you, let's date'. He made them say different words that were much more significant, that made more sense with them, that matched the quality, nuance and emotional heights of their love. Kishi does stress on the importance of words and communication though. I have talked about it here.

Love triangle? Yes, in team seven. Both Naruto and Sakura like Sasuke romantically. Naruto experienced love and became an adult, he surely did. Thanks to Sasuke. It was his memory and Naruto's feelings for him that goaded him to become stronger and more mature and determined af. It isn't a coincidence vote two was right after it was revealed that it was Naruto's seventeenth birthday, he has literally and metaphorically come of age. And then he tells Sasuke again how much he loves him, how he really truly felt about him. In chapter 698. And Sasuke concedes, he is finally at peace, now that he has heard it from Naruto's own mouth. It was important for him to know these 'words'. Words are what gave him his resolution. Naruto's words that he couldn't very well say before.

Kishi was writing this story at a time when it was not acceptable in shounen to have major gay characters. I don't think that's the case today either. Although what we do know is that Naruto anime did try to hetishize Naruto and tried to distract from many sus scenes by adding non canon stuff to it. From Wiki.

Especially not the MC. Naruto is supposedly the first shounen MC to have kissed another boy on the mouth. In canon. This was written under the facade of comedy, as a lot of scenes were especially with Naruto, Kishi had to find a way to create smokescreens and red herrings so as not to get caught red handed. It's not an easy job for the writer to do this and make it believable and effective and so impactful. The average shounen consumer was happy with it, those who looked for a fuller and more layered approach, and complexity in their media also loved it. There was something for everyone in it. This was no easy feat. This takes real talent. And kishi was motivated to do it and how. And he did it too. But it wasn't smooth as butter. He had to fight his editors several times on multiple scenes. Like the reverse oiroke jutsu you are talking about. Very sus, wasn't it? It was meant to be. Or the fight at the vote two. He didn't compromise with his story to the best of his ability. But imagine the pressure he was under. We need to dig a little deeper. It's never that black and white. If it was that bad, then it is safe to assume that Kishi didn't feel comfortable revealing the nature of their relationship explicitly. A lot of artists have gotten canceled or blacklisted for less. Plus, if the gay tones were so overt, the anime would have faced difficulties getting distributed in other countries, mainly North America, because of their syndication rules. From Wiki.

And I have a feeling that Kishi was also reticent because of his own orientation. There has been much debate on this. But I strongly suspect that Kishi relates with Naruto's character. He has said it himself that he sees himself in Naruto. Naruto is his projection, self insert. And Sasuke is his muse, the classic archetypical, dreamy, beautiful but deadly bishounen, that everyone desires, including men. Like Sasuke has been clearly depicted. And I think Kishi is in a similar predicament as Naruto.

4) Naruto and Sasuke are not reincarnated brothers. It's their chakra. That doesn't make them brothers. How exactly does that make them brothers? Where does Kishi make anyone say it or imply it? Madara and Hashirama also had Ashura's and Indra's chakras but people are okay with calling them gay for each other. They were also given very homoerotic scenes. Just like Sasuke and Naruto. But the same people who deny SNS ship Hashimada lol. Unfair, isn't it? They have the special chakras because they are the fated saviours of their world. That reincarnated chakras make them brothers, though is already a ridiculous argument, in no universe cancels out the rest of the story. That's not how it works. The point is Sasuke and Naruto were written as main act of the story. This was the main act, vote two. You know which other thing has a main act just like Shippuden? This.

A double suicide narrative was already in the making, and then Kishi makes sure that his main act is the same as the main act of Chikamatsu's shinjuu plays. Chikamatsu is considered as one the greatest, most prolific playrights Japan has ever produced. His work is pretty much a part of the cultural and literary imagination of Japan. Kishi wanted to pay homage to him, like many other modern Japanese creators.

The main act comes at the end, led by everything that has happened before. The hero and heroine have already tried everything else. But in the main act, they die together after the most profoundly emotional interaction/depiction that rends your heart. Although, in Kishi case, they think they are dead, but they aren't. They live. Kishi had already thought of this ending panel by panel and line by line many years before chapter 698 was published. Hehe. Writers are serious about these things, they have to be isn't it? It's their job. Anyway, that's how crazy this man is. And I love him for it. Don't underestimate him. He did a lot for fans. He is a wonderful artist. He had to give up at the end. And it sucks. But he did his best.

Hopefully this answers your questions.

random question but if you were to change ONE thing about the naruto universe (naruto, naruto shippuden, baruto), what would it be? i love reading your opinions. they're so well-put but feel free to ignore if you don't want to answer or if you've answered something similar before :)

Oh, thank you! *-* And I have before maybe? But my answer might’ve changed by now!

I’m such an idiot though, I read over the ‘Universe’ part and wrote a whole answer about what I would’ve changed about the story itself :’)!! I changed it~

Do you mean the Setting? Politics? The System? Powers? It’s hard to say what I would change because any necessary changes had to be discovered by the characters themselves. For most questions we already have answers. (Though not all are executed.) The Setting was a platform for problems and the characters caused a plot to happen which purpose was to find answers, right? On towards the great aha-moments~

To me anything ‘boruto’ isn’t included in the Narutoverse though, because it really has nothing to do with ‘Naruto’ and it’s an entirely different world where a lot of things contradicts what we knew about it and the issues about the world are forgotten and blamed on aliens because that’s easier I guess and we can keep pretending to all be happy besties because Sasuke was right and we have a common enemy 🙄

But introducing that concept in Part 2 with Kaguya and her sons is definitely something I would change. Everyone can start reading/watching 'Naruto' and understand that using Jutsu through energy from within the body is more than enough. A little exposition here and there to see how that works with the body or whenever anything new came up, was all that is needed. But even then, it wasn’t really necessary to understand the physics of it all and I bet rarely anyone really remembered the first time as I rarely see 'stamina' mentioned. Literally no one. No one ever. Not a single soul needed an explanation about some magical fruit hanging from the 'god tree' that one alien lady one day decided to eat. (I'm getting scared for Sasuke now ngl.)

It’s like watching horror movies. The ‘horror’ literally gets destroyed when they show what the mysterious and invisible antagonistic demon/ghost/killer ACTUALLY is. Give it an appearance or over-explain and you ruin all the fun. Have you seen Paranormal? That's why the first one worked despite the low rating and why the ones where they gave the ghosts a shape/body didn't. And this sorta happened with ‘Naruto’ as well. We didn't need it, nor Kaguya's sob-backstory, or the excruciatingly drawn-out Shinobi war because of it. I guess one thing that really has always annoyed me about it as well is that it made people believe that Naruto and Sasuke’s bond solely relied on fate/destiny even if that wasn't said specifically. That their feelings all of a sudden were presupposed and had nothing to do with.... the entirety of their journeys like wth! The whole point for them was to find their individuality only to say in the end that SIKE the only reason they even interacted was because they had ancient chakra clinging to them. As if all they have done didn’t matter because it wasn’t even them, it was influenced by Hagoromo's alien children. Come on now. 

So, I would remove the entire explanation about the origin of Chakra. It is perfectly fine to create a world where that just is. We don’t need to know why and neither do the characters. Shinobi are all born in a world where that is normal and no one cares about finding it out either because it doesn't even matter, IT WASN'T THE ISSUE. I would keep the real issues in the world and have them fix, acknowledge and face them all because it is the world that they’ve always known and to their knowledge always has been. Rabbit aliens be damned. 

Hello, this is a rant post because I need to evacuate some thoughts, I know this blog isn’t for it, but don’t hesitate to respond in anyway, if you agree or not. I would seriously really appreciate, this blog is the only place where I can really discuss about stuff with people outside of my work environement (because my work is my life, and funnily enough I hate my work.)

Upon rewatching Hellsing (the 2001 show) and now ultimate (the ovas) I’ve come to realize something.

See I’m not usually one for the edgy, I tend to find it more funny and litteraly cringe than cool, it’s not that I don’t like a bit of edge, A dark character can be very cool when done with an appropriate tone or contrast, or just being an evil fucking bastard, for example ruin from UU is very very edge and cringe, but I don’t consider it bad writting at all, he’s litteraly an overzealous fanatic who think he’s god favorite very probably because he got 2 UMA in him who groomed him into thinking he was gonna survive ragnarok, ill never say that the edge in berserk is bad for example, (well I do for some of the stuff that comes before golden age. Before GA guts is a dark sasuke on steroid and outside from the halucinations, I can’t take him seriously)

But anyway, even without my not trully appreciation for the edge, nowadays when someone tells me "oh that show is so cool it’s dark and mature" I’m SUPER OFTEN disappointed. I mean come on guys, really, solo leveling is "the peak of maturity and badass?" "Omg sun said arise, and summon tons of ex bosses he fought that constantly praise him like fangirls" (And for those who haven’t read the manwha, I’ll add that those shadows are among the best characters in the series, and they aren’t great or profound.) or to change series "wow rimuru is so cool now that he transformed into a demon after eating one". "Annos is peak badass, he killed a guy then used magic to resurect him and killed him 100 times!" or even mentioning how there’s people out there who consider stuff like kingdom of ruin or redo no healer "deep and mature" because girls get r*ped in it. Rudeus being labeled as a good guy for doing absolutely no effort in helping a girl who is trap in this world with him because "ugh real world was bullying me" where we’ve seen him do litteraly no effort in real life at all.

It made me realize something, for a while I thought that "yeah it’s just not your age anymore" or "don’t be a boomer, you were cringe too back then" "you lack objectivity" but fuck it I’m gonna say it those series ARE trash, mid at best, but if you consider stuff like THAT peak, really ? You clearly haven’t watched good series, and it’s not an issue of "but it’s the genre / trope" you want good mature show ? They exist, you want a good isekai ? Same, log horizon’s worldbuilding and not have the entire world rely on the powerfull but not op protag is right there, you want a good power fantasy ? Ever heard of fucking dragon ball ? (I know it’s a shonen neketsu first, but really shonen neketsu is power fantasy except with a minimum of depth and characters with personality)

I won’t spoil in details Hellsing / Hellsing ultimate because I really think it’s a story that needs to be watch, but it’s not just good because "ahahah ultra badass psycho vampire, girl with huge boobs and even huger guns and English lady boss kill nazis" the whole story is a parallel about moving on from traumas of the past and the idiocy of following dogmas / the past without thinking, and that’s just scratching what’s good.

Meanwhile what does a show like solo leveling teach us ? "Be on the grind and a sigma male and be super handsome rich and strong because that’s the only way girls and people will care about you and respect you ?" "Be a piece of shit to people and you’ll be rewarded" "every Japanese is an asshole" (ok in all seriousness that last one is something in manwhas in general and it can easily be understand that Korea has a grudge against them because of history)

Anyway all that to say, I’m tired of pretending that mediocre, or even bad series are good just because duhu they’re popular and it’s the new style. There’s PLENTY of good new stuff. But people don’t focus on it and it’s fucking pissing me off.

Just in the shonen genre : dandadan, yozakura familly, undead unluck (duh), jjk ( i mean it’s not very "new Gen" and tbf the last arc crumbles because of gege’s writing and him being stuck with underdeveloped characters that no one care about because he put all his eggs on just a few chars. Basically it was very good for a while, like mha really (even though for mha it’s because the author takes 0 risk and just wants to please the fans) didn’t paid off, but you can respect the work) sakomoto days or yes even kagurabachi (throw in the memes) and even BIG SHOCKER one piece.

And that’s JUST SOME of jump’s content (well dandadan isn’t in the main magazine but shut up) AND I just talked about the most apreciated genre of battle shonen, staying in jump you got very fucking cool stuff like blue box, akanebanashi, csm, witch watch, elusive samouraï.

And once again, that’s just from jump and currently running. If you want good writen stories of any genre theres TON, and I can assure you that you will find badass and cool characters you can self insert into, difference is that they have actual care put into them, and say stuff, and have more than 1 character.

To chill me out I’ll remember than frieren and apothecary diaries got freakishly good results and that’s very fucking cool. I’ll also remember that we have very good non shonen targeted stuff like some high quality rom coms (dress up darling (in its first parts, gojo’s continuous depression and self doubt is getting on my nerves personally, they made him regress and it sucks) komi can’t comunicate, bochi the rock or dangers in my heart come to mind) Go watch them (the diaries have like, no action at all, but at the minimum go watch frieren, there’s a reason why people are saying it’s a new goat on the level of a fmab, as long as you have two neurons and now how to focus on a story, you’ll have a wonderfull time, it’s also plenty epic)

Anyway all that rant to say : it’s ok to like trash, I do to for other stuff, everyone does, it can even be your favorite thing. But please for the love of god and anything sacred, do yourself a favor and actually watch / read good stuff, varied at least, try to analyze what makes a good story and don’t be a slave to market that copy paste formula harder than an ai fucking could. It’s so fucking tiring to see authors and passionate project crash when next to them a copy pasta formula who does no effort and just rubs the viewer in the good way to have them brain disconnect on it. I know that anime and manga is a distraction, it’s for fun, but respect work and creativity for f sake (Queue the joke about the fact that a person who does ai art says all that)

how can people say sakura loves sasuke? ha, if loving is caring about someone's appearance and mysteriousness, i get it.... Sakura's "love" is so selfish, I wouldn't call it love. it would be a toxic love. at the beginning of the story (and throughout part1!) she acted totally like a fangirl. no one can deny that. then we have to go back to when Sasuke left the village... the speech she gave there was manipulative and selfish!! ughh... she was the same in part2, she didn't change, then she tried to kill Sasuke which is fair and normal because Sakura is a kunoichi who works for that Konoha sh*thole. but I HATE it when some fans say "she's doing it out of love, that's true love". love????? anyway, we know Kakashi isn't the best about emotions no need to talk about it after that. but people shouldn't call it love... Sasuke repeatedly said he didn't love her, but she was still obsessed with him. Like Kishimoto said, she's ADDICTED to him. sorry for being so angry, but really...😞

ohh, anon i definitely understand your feelings. you're so right and you've to say it! sakura's love is toxic, it's only blind fans who ignore this fact 😮‍💨😮‍💨

sakura never changed throughout the whole story. if you read kishimoto's writing carefully and w logic, you can see. sometimes i think kishimoto hate her

some fans say "she's doing it out of love, that's true love"

oh my goddd, what a love to treat sasuke like an animal that needs to be killed 😭😭❤️❤️

i think it might be coming from this panel, yknow.. some ppl take what the characters say very seriously (but for god's sake it was sai who said this bullshit... and i don't need to tell you how he is about emotions) kakashi is the same way btw

sasuke repeatedly said he didn't love her, but she was still obsessed with him

in the text here, change genders :) and everyone's behavior will be "different" 😮‍💨

yes, she's addicted to sasuke. no more no less. and anon, i suggest you don't take sakura or sasusaku fans seriously :)

i kept the answer short but i agree with EVERYTHING you said. you're right, like sasuke ❤️

have a nice day! 🌼

Hello, I am just curious about two questions:

1. If you absolutely need to pair people up in Naruto like kishimoto did in chapter.700, who would you prefer with Sakura? Take myself for example, I am not opposed to Rock Lee with Sakura. In manga, they seem to have some chemistry similar to the anime version of Naruto and Sakura, and she was much nicer to him after being rescued by him.

2. Are there any chances for some future Uchiha kids in KH universe? I like Sarada but she sometimes seems more Sakura than Sasuke. I am so in for kids of Naruto and Sasuke. Black hair, blue eyes…definitely cute kids.

You know Naruto could give birth to kids based on the information provided in the databooks.

Tks!

god, yeah, i think rock lee would be the only option I'd have for sakura- although inosaku is so damn pretty together, i just can't see them in canon unfortunately 😭. i really enjoyed the softer side of Sakura that lee brought out of her, and i enjoyed her character growth in regards to him.

as for Uchiha kids, I don't think Sasuke will ever try for biological kids. keep in mind, my brain is still in the mindset of where we left off of him- a few days away from turning 19 in the epilogue- so that might be clouding my judgement. he definitely isn't ready for it, and he'd have a hell of a basket case to unpack to be okay with it. i currently find it so much more likely that he and naruto adopt some orphan child in the woods completely on accident they just save the kid and a month later they realize the kid has been living with them every day and calls one of them "dad" on accident anf it's a whole revelation

......please fucking enlighten me with what in the fresh hell this data book info is that says Naruto can get pregnant bc what in the actual fuck did kishi contrive to make his oc capable of mpreg i NEED this information so i can dissect his brain

Are there any Soriku / sasunaru parallels in particular that make you lose it?

Okay there’s at least 15 that have been rattling around in my brain for months, but this post would be a mile long. So I’m gonna pick out the 7 that slapped me across the face the most upon first going from Naruto to KH. Let’s start with this one cause I sorta mentioned it not long ago:

My Riku / My Sasuke

If I had a nickel for every time a usually cheerful protagonist searching for their broody best friend who tried to kill them snapped because some slimy scientist who likes to play god spoke possessively about their best friend, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice.

Screenshots cannot do this justice. You have to see Sora literally bent over shaking in rage to understand why this is a remotely applicable comparison to Naruto going 4-tailed Kyuubi mode on the bridge… I hit the 10 pic limit, so iykyk… Also interesting how both boys have a demon form that’s triggered by rage, though Sora doesn’t have Rage Form yet in CoM.

The Dark Margin / The Valley of the End

Honestly, what beats finally starting to share your feelings and understand each other after so much conflict, which is meaningfully reflected by the setting — a place where two opposing but complementary forces meet and reconcile? Saying, “I love you,” without having to say it? At peace with dying because you’re finally together? Nothing. Nothing beats this. Together at the end of the world. Together at the end of this life, to walk side-by-side into the next one.

Yin and Yang, babey

Naruto and Sasuke quite literally possess the powers of Yang and Yin, respectively, to save the world. They get these sick sun and moon tattoos. Their chakras — yellow, hot, bright/purple, cold, dark — also reflect this dichotomy. Sora and Riku have the whole Symphony of Sorcery, which is very day, sky, warm/night, ground, cold — visual representations of their complementary heart songs. Their [light and darkness are] Eternal Session. The Gayblade.

What’s nice about Sora and Riku is that it’s more obvious that they work in yinyang, though. During Eternal Session, for instance, they switch between who uses light and dark abilities, whereas Naruto and Sasuke’s chakras are strictly light and dark, respectively.

Taisetsu [na hito]

“When a person has something precious to protect, that’s when they can become truly strong.” Riku and Naruto actually share this parallel — becoming strong to protect their precious people (Sora and Sasuke). This is a core aspect of their characters and respective arcs. It’s pretty self-explanatory.

But this theme applies to Sora and Sasuke, too, as the ones who first show Riku and Naruto this strength of heart — they “save” Riku and Naruto, literally and figuratively, and this is part of what drives Riku and Naruto to return the favor when it’s Sora and Sasuke in need of saving.

Additionally… Sasuke has to kill the person most precious to him to achieve ultimate power but can’t no matter how hard he tries because he loves Naruto more than anything. This is the final tie to his heart, his humanity, that he just cannot sever… Sora spends all of CoM trying to find his most precious person. His memories are completely scrambled by the end and, amidst the chaos and lies, he clings to a singular truth, the only tie he knows is real — a promise to protect his most precious person. A promise, as it would turn out, he exchanged with Riku… Naruto and Riku are the final ties to their hearts and selves. That’s what I’m saying.

Riku and Sasuke laughing

…because of Sora and Naruto :) The two’s earnest foolishness, like making a funny face or still caring about a childhood rivalry on their deathbed, breaks through Riku and Sasuke’s doom and gloom, and for the first time ever we see them laughing! Despite everything that’s happened, everything they’ve done, there are truly some things that never change and some bonds that are unbreakable… It’s unconditional love, Sora and Naruto’s stubborn refusal to treat their beloved friends any differently, that warms Riku and Sasuke’s cold hearts.

Kakkoii

A Japanese term used to describe someone as cool/handsome/good-looking… and the word both Sora and Naruto use when they let slip that Riku and Sasuke are attractive.

Sora does this when he remarks that he’s not as handsome/good-looking as Yozora (though the clothes kind of match), to which Goofy is quick to point out Yozora looks a lot like Riku. In the EN dub, Donald simply agrees — but in JP, Donald actually teases Sora, “Very good-looking, huh?”

In early Shippuden, after Sai is introduced to the team, Sakura remarks that Sai looks a lot like Sasuke. Naruto, who wants nothing to do with Sai, is quick to scoff that Sasuke is way better looking than Sai, before he realizes what he said and quickly tries to backtrack.

It’s also worth noting, in earlier concepts of Sasuke’s character introduction, Naruto’s initial reaction to Sasuke (in this case, after being saved by him) is blushing and thinking, “Sasuke kakkoii…”

“Your hearts are always in tune, so they’re free to sing.” / “I know your heart, and you know mine.”

Homoromantic quotes that more or less mean the same thing… and more or less reveal how both pairings can sense/feel each other in different worlds, dimensions, etc… things that make me crazy. The Naruto series uses chakra connections, while KH has connected hearts. Naruto/Sasuke and Sora/Riku take those connections a step further… basically giving you the series’ equivalent of soulmates.

Each relationship is also the heart of their series. They embody the themes, the messages. They are the emotional core. They are what the story is about… And that story is undeniably a love story, regardless of what kind of love you see it as. ❤️ While there are many parallels between Soriku and SNS, they are by no means the same. But I adore both relationships.

What do you say to the people who think the show should've ended after the Pain arc?

Found this on Reddit. "Because pretty much everyone got what they wanted, Naruto is acknowledged by the village and on his way to become hokage, Hinata confesses her feelings (just have Naruto reciprocate), Sasuke gets his revenge on Itachi, Sakura gets Sasuke back."

Did this person watch the same show I did?! Halp.

Uhhh???

[[Disclaimer : Naruto stans and Sasuke stans. Just don't Interact]]

So, Naruto's only goal was to become an Hokage by getting acknowledgement from the people??? Not because he genuinely want to help people who are not even from his Village, Right?? Such a classic moron!!!! Because, Gaara is not from Suna Village. He is from Konoha... Oh!! Woow.

Naruto protected his Village from Pain after learning Senjutsu.... All because he wanted some fucking Acknowledgement, Right?? Not because he lost his Master, his Sensei and his Home, eh??? Oh, Naruto definitely wasn't Applauded by the Villagers after his battle with Neji...

ALT

ALT

And Iruka didn't even casually mention the fact that the Villagers are talking about Naruto in high regard???!!! 

ALT

But he still wanted more Acknowledgement... Oh My God!!! Naruto is Such a Validation seeking Whore.

So, No... Naruto’s dream was never about getting Acknowledgement. It was always about making the world, a better place. 

ALT

And that’s why Naruto said his dream was to make everyone to co-operate with each other... with the help of Sasuke. A Boy who started out as someone who wanted to find a place in this world has now evolved into someone who wanted to change that world... 

Claims like ‘Naruto only needed Acknowledgement’ is such a disgrace to Naruto’s character. He is not a fucking Sakura for shit sake!!! To have no mental development since forever. Yes, Naruto’s dream started out as too naive and ambitious... But after every Arc, Naruto learns something, Changes himself and his dreams too evolved as a whole... (His Dreams evolution has everything to do with the Series theme as well... Which I’ll do in my other post)

As for Sasuke, Hmmmm......

Am not going on detail with Sasuke's character Journey after Pain Arc because even his rabid stans themselves don't get his character right. They keep on harping about "Sasuke wanted to Change the rotten System" agenda when in reality Sasuke only came to that conclusion towards the very end of the Manga with just 65 chapters to go (Chapter 635). Whereas Sasuke knew the truth about Itachi at around 401st chapter. What was he doing for 200+ chapters though???

They keep on raging about Sasuke wanted justice for Uchiha Clan... When in Reality Sasuke was lounging around with Obito, a guy who massacred his Clan out of pure whim... A guy who kept 100+ sharingans which he stole from his dead clan members right after the massacre... A guy who brought utter disaster to his clan by releasing Kyuubi (a fact Sasuke knew all too well but ignored it conveniently).

They keep on screaming fucking Capitalism and Communism nonsense when in reality Naruto series has never ever hinted such concepts anywhere... Neither did Sasuke.

If his stans themselves don't get his character right close to a remote 10%, It's very much expected that Reddit Dudebros also won't get it...

So, No... The Series couldn’t possibly end around Pain Arc... That’s the path decider of Naruto and Sasuke.

YOURE SO FUNNY STOP😭 the Uchiha clan really r just a bunch of brother/cousinfuckers and we love them for it! I also dont think Sasuke needed saving, hes one of those characters I wish had done even worse tbh. I watched Naruto as a child and it was like The biggest formative influence ever but growing up and coming back to it I started to better understand the politics of Narutouniverse and lots of things changed for me. including the way I wish things had gone differently for Sasuke but oh well

😭😭😭 if only you saw me back in 2020 spending hours upon hours discussing politics of the narutoverse and writing essays on the konoha propaganda 😭😭

It"s still SUCH a sore spot for me bc no one, no one ever acknowledged how fucked what happened to the uchiha clan was. Why shouldnt have Sasuke be angry, why shouldn't he want to kill everyone after learning the truth. When in Swan Song Dean said, "so what about Sam? What about me? Where is my grand prize? all i got is my brother in a hole." Really, what about Sasuke? Naruto becomes the Hokage and Sakura gets to be with man of her dream & everyone is left unaware of the rotten deeds of the village and all Sasuke got was a massacred clan and his brother in a hole.

I'm not saying it was right that Sasuke wanted to kill every kage (i mean god wasn't his attack on their meeting so so sexy?? Shouldn't he have simply killed more??) But i think his anger is very palpable and justified. to me at least.

Who wouldn't go batshit after having their world crumbling down like that, who wouldn't lose it after knowing they killed the one person who loved them more than the whole world?? And sometimes i just think about how itachi said "no matter what you choose to do i love you" how itachi knew he had to tell sasuke he loves him even if he goes off to mass murder the whole village.

Sasuke and Sam both share this very interesting trait i think where it's easy to dislike them when you are younger because you don't really understand why they did what they did. But you grow up and at one point it hits you. You need to have experienced certain degree of grief and anger at your own loss and weakness to be able to get them. And i think both series are always worth a rewatch as an adult.

I know you are a hardcore NaruSaku shipper but do you ever feel like a good chunk of the hatred for SasuSaku is because people just hate Sakura? People recognize it as problematic and will describe how Sasuke treats Sakura as abusive but then they will just use it to bash Sakura because she "didn't pick the right guy". Sakura gets most of the hatred in their dynamic.

This leaves me with the impression that a lot of Sakura haters who swear they hate her for being poorly written, would STILL hate her regardless of who she was paired with. And I feel like it all boils down to her first impression. Hinata is introduced as this shy girl who roots for the main character (who was an underdog). Sakura is introduced as an Uchiha fangirl who made fun of the MC. People don't care that Sakura regrets being mean to him in like the same chapter and that she arguably becomes his closest friend.

Basically, I guess I'm trying to say that I feel like if NaruSaku was canonized or Sakura moved on, Naruto fans would continue to hate her over something she said as a 12 year old.

Oh, they'd definitely hate her for that, but the reasons are because people would hate Sakura for anything.

As I said in a previous ask, even if there wouldn't be a reason to hate, they'd invent one so they can have the excuse to hate on her, cuz God forbid they'd be accountable for the fact that they are hate filled people and Sakura is just the medium they use as an excuse for their actions.

However, let's be real, the fact that she is still with Sasuke after the way he treated her is a major factor as well. You know why?

Because it speaks in terms of self respect. I always said it. She could've just stay single. Didn't have to "choose Naruto over Sasuke". She doesn't owe Naruto anything for the love he had for her. That's the whole point of pure selfless love. This kind of love just gives without waiting for anything in return. It's just people that wanna have a go at NS fans that use that silly argument.

But the fact that she chose to CHASE after a guy who treated her poorly throughout their teen years tells to the audience that she had no respect for her own self.

Ask any self-respecting woman, any self-respecting adult if the characterization of Sakura in the SS dynamics is okay and let them tell you the truth.

But I'm talking about someone who's not in the entertainment industry, who is put there to entertain your ideas as long as the money comes in.

Nah.

I'm talking about normal human beings. Parents. Go to a dad or a mom and ask them if they'd advise their daughter to chase after someone who treated their daughter the way Sasuke treated Sakura.

Or ask them if they think the way Sakura's behavior is around Sasuke (cuz boy she has her own share of fault here, too) is a healthy one and a behavior that needs to be encouraged?

Or a psychologist.

Or a relationship expert.

So you see, the thing is things generally with Sakura are way more complicated and complex.

I love her character to death and I consider that she is unfairly hated for many stupid reasons.

However, I also agree with the fact that some of the hate is founded on problematic aspects that do exist within her character.

Let's not hide the dirt under the rug.

But at the end of the day the reality is that this hate is a mix of all these aspects, but mainly hating her is a popular trend so everybody that wants to "get famous" on the internet, just jumps in the wagon of Sakura hate.

The Sakura hate is more of a social phenomena.

AO3 wrapped!

Respond to this with what you would call the top 5 fanfics you’ve read in 2022. Any genre! Any ship! (Bonus points: if you’re a creator, make this a 5+1 and include your favorite fic you wrote in 2022!)

Then leave this in your friends’ asks too. Let’s give creators one more spotlight before the year ends, and share some of what we’ve enjoyed along the way!

Hiii mikey!! Had to go dig in bookmarks and deliberate how to narrow it down to five, that is so little to account for all the amazing ones I’ve read this year 😭 so I’ll try to put a few from different fandoms. 

TCW

politicians in my eyes by jaigeye. A Fox kills Palp fic, but I will know it as THE Fox kills Palp fic. This fic still lives in my head rent free all the time. It’s amazing. I remember reading it while listening to the accompanying playlist. A whole different experience. Remi’s writing is just, I can’t even explain it. Amazing amazing stuff. 

their days are darker by Cal. CAL FIC BELOVED. Thank you so much for hyping this fic up on the dash when it was ongoing. Because I would have never seen it. The first cal fic I read and how I got to meet Cal. Holding this most belovedly because e mo tions. 

Naruto

The Last Time I'll Abandon You by professor of naruto. Just holy shit. I’m in the process of re-reading it right after catching up because I can’t put my thoughts about it in words just yet. Because it’s just so so SO good. I went through the entire thing like, ‘oh god everything happens so much to him. Oh god someone PLEASE help him’ It’s :(((( I’m so emo. It’s so good. I love the way they’ve written each character, especially Rin. This fic hurts my heart and I love love love it.

Dance of the Dog God by Tartarun. AU where kks went rogue before Kannabi. And Obito adopts Naru and Sasuke. Cool exploration of how different everyone’s dynamics would be in this situation. Awesome mission arcs. The words they string together are breathtaking. Sometimes I just reread certain lines like wow. I need to print these words out and eat them. The worldbuilding of Uzushio is so so cool. Very highly recommended. 

Disco Elysium

10,000 Things According to Will by Lepak. Kim reconnecting with his Seolite heritage and all the mixed feelings that come with that. This one made me genuinely cry and feel so homesick. There were so many moments in this one where I had to stop and say, ‘hey, I’ve felt this. Hey, I’ve had this dish before’. Just very genuine and beautiful writing. 

+1 

My favorite this year of my own writing is Of Hair Dyes and Dolls  This was my first time writing Sabine and Rebels fic in general. But I really loved the way I wrote this. It felt like a little movie, and I’m so glad I was finally able to convey that grandpa granddaughter relationship between her and Remedy. 

10, 15, 20, 29 for ao3 wrapped o.o

sdfhfdkgh i wish i knew who you were my beloved anon <3

answers below the cut xoxo

10. What work was the quickest to write?

spoken words by a landslide. i've talked about this before, but that fic, start to finish, maybe took me 5 - 6 hours at most. i had exactly one scene marinating in my head with no contect for a month ("Lee comes to Sunagakure, and Gaara comes to him in the dead of night." and associated like... four lines) and i was like hey uh brain what do with this? then one sunday i brained the summary text, took a nap, woke back up, and wrote the entire fic in one go. what you see on the archive is essentially it, i sat on it for two days looking for edits and just didn't feel like it needed any. one and done babey!

15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

god there's SO MANY HELP. but with exclusively wips i've actually done work for, here's the list: from these bones, untethered, my insidious au, sing a song of sleeptide, a fluffy 5+1 things about sleeping together, The Grapes of Debauchery, another explicit comedy fic about drunken shenanigans, if it's the last night of your life, a one-night-stand-has-results fic, and my untitled enemies to lovers longfic based on the video game ghost of tsushima.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

skfhdkgh We Don't Talk About Fight Club for sheer volume of editing, i think. there was a point where it's the only wip i looked at, every single day, for months. i probably put more work into that fic than i did my master's thesis. i've probably read it over a hundred times and that's not an exaggeration, i can probably recite parts of it. i still reread it occasionally, i'm very proud it (plus like. art. pls, how can u not just keep looking???)

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

how dare u ask me to Pick One. i cannot do this, instead u are getting several of my faves. rekt

from spoken words:

Lee is brave. But Lee is not fearless.

no ok so like there's a LOT of lines in spoken words that i think smash it out of the ballpark and deserve line-of-the-year status, but this one is special because it beautifully encapsulates lee's entire character in under 10 words. the brevity! i will never be so concise ever again

from sailing stones

“You – you do not find me unattractive, like this?” Lee whispered. I have never once thought you anything but beautiful, Gaara thought to himself. For a moment, they remained, suspended in time, the world blurring to nothing around them. Gaara brushed his lips over Lee’s, once. Twice. Chakra crackled, electric in the space between them. “Gaara…?” And Lee, the paragon of formality, breathed his name with no honorific, so low Gaara wondered if he’d imagined it on an exhale, and the moment was so intimate it bordered on painful, tipping them both over a precipice across which there would never be any return.

ok so this was one of those bits where i wrote that last line, looked at it, announced out loud, "fuck yeah, i wrote that," then proceeded to treat myself to oreos. i fully stand by this today. sailing stones my first child, i love u dearly and will edit u soon, but this piece won't be touched. i feel like it captures the feeling of the whole fic exactly how i wanted it to.

from We Don't Talk About Fight Club (length warning but it's all short lines)

“So… you did fuck,” Naruto said gleefully. “Who topped?” “Naruto!” Sakura stage-whispered, appalled. “What? I always thought Bushy Brow kinda had like, bottom energy, ya know?” Sai’s face went suddenly curious, and he pulled out a notebook from seemingly nowhere in an action that reminded Kankurō creepily of Lee. He asked, weirdly polite, “Is this ‘bottom energy’ a mutually recognisable feeling between those with a proclivity towards that position? Because Sasuke is always the penetrating partner when you two fuck, Naruto.” Hot damn. The table went eerily silent again. Naruto inhaled his water and came up sputtering. “That… how the fuck do you—no. No. We’re talking about Gaara and Bushy Brow right now! Anyway, Gaara?” “That…” Gaara said sedately, returning to his lunch, his sand silent, all his composure returned, “is not your business.” Kankurō filed away that tidbit of information to snicker at later, returning to focus on his brother. Gaara wasn’t tall enough to bone someone on a kitchen table comfortably, and now that he thought about it, that crater on Lee’s kitchen table looked a lot like a handprint… “Please at least tell me you were responsible and used protection,” Temari asked, one hand rubbing her temple like she was in pain. … Gaara had been walking slow all day, had barely moved in his seat, and he’d definitely winced at least once this morning… The answering silence told everyone far, far too much. …oh man… “Gaara!” Temari scolded. …his little brother… “I mean, does it matter? Sai confirmed they both have dicks, they probably can’t knock each other up,” Naruto said, still laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes now. …Gaara of the Desert… “You can still. Get. Herpes!” Sakura shrieked. …the Kazekage of Sunagakure… Naruto looked at her, skeptical. “If Bushy Brow has herpes, I’ll eat Gaara’s Kage hat. You think he’s actually piped anyone before?” …had let a foreign ninja… Temari choked on her tea. …had let fucking Rock Lee… “Oh my gods, Naruto, I’m making you sit through Sex Ed again, did you learn nothing!?” …green jumpsuit enthusiast Rock Lee… “Hey, at least the lube we gave him for his last birthday would have come in handy!” Naruto chortled, completely ignoring his teammate. …bowlcut Rock Lee… Sakura sighed. “I’m sorry to ask this,” she said to Gaara, “but as a medic… please tell me whatever lubricant you used was sealed in a white tube with a yellow label? If it was, that’s the one we got him , and it wouldn’t be expired, since that was only a few months ago.” …who wore orange fucking legwarmers... Gaara nodded to her. She nodded back, as pink as her hair. …rail him over a kitchen table. That was so fucking funny he was going to shit—

ok so this passage i think is the absolute most Chaotic Stupid piece in the whole megadong anime crackfic extravaganza and that's exactly the energy i wanted to convey. i loved writing from kankuro's pov because i basically use him to write from My POV so it's just dumbass hours all day, plus naruto is just an absolute meme in this fic and i love it. bonus points to me for including 1(one) brooklyn99 reference. i will never be this funny again i wasted all my life savings of comedy on this one fkcmdngnldgjd fic

and finally, from in the space between:

Pressed between their bodies in Gaara’s coat pocket, a pale jade ring, inlaid with a delicate, winding ribbon of Gaara’s chakra-infused sand, burns like a star.

not only does this line out me as have fiance fever because i was thinking about the ring im shopping around for when i wrote it, but also SOMFT, and i think it's the most stunning ending line i've written for it's simplicity, though in context it answers multiple questions and completely changes what the scene means when you read it again. and i will use it to end my really long answers! hope u enjoyed thank u for enabling me xoxo

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