Glow up or glow down?

I'm rewatching POTC *again*

Currently I film 2 and I realised how bad the 5th movie actually is. It doesn't line up with the story and the old characters(Elizabeth, Jack) are done so dirty.

The movie is still funny and I still love it, but its not good.

Pirates of the Caribbean 5: Salazar’s Revenge, or Dead Men Tell No Tales (2017)

A dead pirate is searching the ocean for Jack Sparrow to take his revenge and only the Trident of Poseidon can stop him.

 As far as the franchise goes, it’s not the worst one and many of the battle scenes are entertaining and amusing enough. One of the more interesting aspects was that we’re given a little more lore concerning the compass, the nature of the sea magic, and Jack’s past. None of it is made specifically clear but it adds a little more to our idea of the world.

 The humour didn’t work so well in places for this sequel. Many of the jokes seemed somewhat too obvious or just didn’t have the right performance. The family trivia of the new main characters was fairly basic and predictable; feeling like many other Disney action films to come out around the same time, the part on the anchor looked almost exactly the same and felt semantically similar to one near the end of Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (2017).

 This one did better than its predecessor because there was more focus on continuity and some aspects of each of the previous films were included, whereas the previous installment felt as though it was a spin-off from the main series. The effects were up to their usual high standard and were a large part of what made it entertaining.

 One effect that didn’t land so well was the age-down appearance for some of the actors that looked odd and was rather distracting. The villain was alright and performed well by the actor but was overall rather underwhelming. The most irritating thing was that a new token female was included in roughly the same role as the previous one who also appears briefly for a cameo but isn’t permitted to speak.

 3/10 -This one’s bad but it’s got some good in it, just there-

 -Some liberties were taken with the shark anatomy like giving them a larger, human-like, rib cage.

-Production locations were used secretly, naming the film “Herschel” so that fans wouldn’t interrupt filming.

-Despite roughly 25 years passing since last seeing Elizabeth and Will in the main body of the film, Will hasn’t aged due to his curse, however Elizabeth doesn’t appear to have aged the full time either.

Made a model of the Silent Mary out of plasticine, cloth, cotton, and necklace beads.

After a very impressive start and some standout moments throughout the movie, this latest installment was a bit mediocre.

Carina is the kind of person to read Percy Jackson in 6th grade and act like she knows everything about Greek mythology 

If only the movie didn’t ignore the books..

I really felt quite attracted to Capitán Salazar. Call me weird if you want, but I think he's really sexy even as a ghost!

Cleaning up after the mess that is PotC 5 *UPDATED*

Ok so I was thinking about how they completely screwed the lore up for Jack Sparrow, so I’m gonna have a go at piecing together his origin story, among other things. Please poke holes/ tell me where I’m wrong because I want to get this refined.

Problem: Jack’s compass was bartered from Tia Dalma, but in 5 he got it from a crewman. Solution: Jack did, in fact, get the compass from the crewman but later lost it at sea when Beckett sank the Pearl. It came to Tia Dalma (Calypso) who recognised its power and Jack had to later barter it from her to retrieve it.

Problem: the Wicked Wench was shown as a pirate ship, but Jack worked for the navy (’people aren’t cargo’ scene). Solution: The Wench was a pirate ship when she was under control of the previous captain seen in 5, but when he died and she became Jack’s ship, Jack decides to join the navy and work under Beckett (he was still very young + not yet branded and probably saw it as the best thing to do). When Beckett asked Jack to ship slaves, he liberated them, got branded, etc. and the ship sank. This explains the pirate flag in 5 and also the problem of ‘Why would Beckett sink a navy ship just to get back at Jack?’ Jack goes on to make a deal with Davy Jones and you know the rest. 

UPDATED Problem: Jack is a gallant hero and very intelligent, so why was he ‘drunk’ the whole time? This one really pisses me off personally Solution: it’s been however-many years since Jack has been on sea, as we saw in one of the scenes the thing he desires most is to sail again, so it could be excused that he wishes to drown his sorrows 24/7, considering he’s no longer a ‘wanted’ or famous pirate, he doesn’t have a ship or much of a crew and his friends aren’t in contact with him. *ALSO Angelica has the voodoo doll of Jack, as seen at the end of 4. This could be the reason for his misfortune and *ahem* strange behaviour. Thank you to the person who suggested this to me!

Problem: Why does Will Turner have barnacle-face when we know that this only happens to those who do not fulfil their duty (i.e. Davy Jones)?  Solution: Will did not have barnacle-face up until that point. It could be assumed he was doing his job well and then noticed Henry was drowning and stopped ferrying the dead in order to save him, i.e. as soon as he ‘crossed-over’ he gained the barnacles. This would explain why Will only had a few barnacles and not ‘transformed’ like Jones.

Problem: Why is Elizabeth in a dress and corset when the whole point of the first movie was freeing her from it? AARGH I hate this one aswell, completely undermines Elizabeth. Oh well. Solution: Elizabeth felt it necessary to return to civilization to raise Henry, she did not want him involved in piracy for his own good and therefore didn’t talk about Jack. At the time, a woman such as Elizabeth would have been known in civilized culture as ‘governor’s daughter’ rather than ‘pirate king’, so she has to live up to this name in order to be accepted in that society (remember we’re talking 18th century here). She doesn’t have her husband, Jack or even mentor!Barbossa to help ‘free her’ from these expectations

EDITED Problem: When, in the time between being cursed, dead, looking for Jack, joining the navy and controlling the ocean did Barbossa have time to have a wife and child? Solution: After the events of AWE,  he had Smyth as a wife, who later became pregnant and died in childbirth, afraid that Carina would be worse off as a pirate girl, and, of course, out of a sense of his merciful nature caring dad!Barbossa left Carina at the orphanage. Barbossa then joins the navy. (thanks to everyone who pointed out my mistake)

Please bear in mind that I am not defending Pirates 5, just trying to clean up the mess. Add your thoughts and drink up me hearties, yo ho! ( @dhiatzs ) 

C'MON LET'S MAKE A SOLO HECTOR BARBOSSA MOVIE

Captain Salazar x Reader

You were awoken by the sounds of shouts and thundering footsteps on the deck above you. It had been almost five days since your ship was destroyed by pirates. You were the only one that made it out alive, but were quickly captured afterwards to be held as ransom or worse if the pirates didn't get paid fast enough. There was definitely a personal fear of the pirates that you had gained over the past few days. They were going to be sure that you didn't give them any trouble either. During the five days that you had been onboard this floating piece of hell, you had only been given enough water to make sure that you didn't die before they wanted you to, but there had been absolutely no food. The mixture of these two factor made you extremely weak. You could still stand up, but just hardly and you had to lean on the bars of the cell you were in to stay up. The way that the pirates up on deck were running around and screaming orders back and forth at the top of their lungs made you told you that they were afraid of something. Part of you hoped that it was a naval ship that would get you out of the horrible situation that you had found yourself in, but most of you knew that that wasn't what was happening. Pirates fought the navy, yes, but most of the time they did not fear them. Not to the extent of what was happening right now anyways. Whatever was up there would probably be even worse for you than the crew it was after. It was either a strong pirate ship, or something even worse. There was much talk around the sea and its islands about the many supernatural beings and places that a person could run into if they were not careful. Surely those were just legend though, right? There was no way that things like krakens and curses actually existed. There was no time to contemplate the mythological aspects of life, however, because the sound of more feet running about the deck followed quickly by blood-curdling screams. Whomever was chasing this ship caught up with it before any convos could be fired. That was inhumanly fast, certainly faster than any other ship you had heard of. You thoughts were pulled back to the deck, or rather, what had started to come form between the boards of it. Blood in vast amounts started to drizzle from some less integral areas in the planks. You almost screamed at the gruesome sight, but stopped yourself right before you did. There was no doubt in your mind that whomever was up there would eventually find you down here,(it's not like you could run anywhere, even if you weren't in this cell) but you wanted to be sure that your presence wasn't known until the absolute last moment. There was a certain set of footfalls that caught your attention more than the others for some reason. Maybe it was because they seemed to somehow have a almost demanding presence with them, or how no other steps dared go near them. The ones that did were followed momentarily with a thump and more blood leaking through the boards above. Maybe what caught your attention about the steps the most was the fact that they were making they're way to where the stairs leading to the level you were on were located. It seemed as though a trip on The Dutchman would come sooner than you had thought. There was the thumping of boots on the thin, wooden planks that made the stairs, followed by the sight of boots the looked to be fancy at one point, but were now ragged from extensive damage. A uniform that had the same look as the boots. For a second you have a slight gleam of hope. Based on the uniform that whomever this was had, he was a high ranking officer in a naval fleet. Maybe he had just been in many skirmish while on the seas without a chance to port, and that's why his uniform was so worn. Those hopes were quickly shattered when he came the rest of the way down the stairs. As he came closer you noticed that part of his face, close to where one of his ear would be, was gone, replaced by what looked to be a black fog of some sort. The part of his face that was still there was crackled, and broken looking with deathly white skin. It looks akin to when someone dropped a porcelain doll. "Buenas tardes." He says to you with a slight chuckle in his voice, the tone of which lets you know that although he found the situation humorous, it was still potentially deadly for you. He also noticed that the slight recognition on your face meant you understood what he said. Whomever this being was finished walking the distance to your cell, using his sword as a makeshift walking stick. The whole time he came towards you his long, dark hair flowed and swirled to and fro as if it was moving through water rather than air, solidifying his unnatural presence even more. "¿Habla español?" The man questioned while locking his eyes with yours. His eyes were a bright amber, that almost looked looked they were made of fire. This made you feel ever more frightened than before. "U-un poquito..." you manage to stutter in response to his question. This made him laugh before saying, "And, I, a little English. But, we should still be able to understand one another, yes?" All you were able to do was shake your head in conformation. For as much as you hated these bars you were behind, at least they made a barrier between you and the apparition in front of you. "I am Capitán Salazar. And, I was chasing down a certain pirate when I intercepted this ship. Now, I USUALLY send the soul survivor of a ship, you in this instance, on a small boat to tell others of what they have seen. This worthless thing that the pirate vermin try to call a ship, doesn't have any life boats. None that would work at least. Do you see the problem here?" The one in front of you explained. This explanation made you even more uneasy than you were already. Of course you'd be the one who would be the exception to the man who usually leaves one person alive. The one time he killed everyone, you had to be there. The captain apparently saw the concern on your face, and moved even closer to tell you something. Most of the time someone wouldn't be able to get closer to you than he already was because of the bars, but he just walked through them like they weren't even there. You were almost too shocked with what he just did to hear what he said to you next. "Well, you are obviously not a pirate, or the English Navy, and I'm not in the habit of killing innocents, so I suppose you're going to sail with us for awhile." When he said that you almost fell onto the floor. Salazar caught you before you could, and leaned you back onto your resting place one the wall. "How long have you been here?" He asked you after a moment. "About a week." You managed to mumble to him while you were still trying to figure out what was going on. Not only did you just find out that ghost sailors actually existed, you were also just told that you would be on the same ship as them for awhile. "I've never been in a situation like this before." Salazar mumble in thought before looking at you with a sly smile. "At least my passenger is a visually alluring one." You almost fell over again, and once again he caught you. There was no way that any of this was real. You were just delirious after all you've been through, right? Then why did his strong hold on you feel so real?

Imagine Will and Elizabeth finding out that their son's girlfriend is Barbossa's daughter

throwback to the pirates of the caribbean : dmtnt premiere in shanghai!

Like/reblog if you save

tbh I think one of the saddest parts of the movie was Lesaro's look of realization as Salazar abandoned his crew instead of helping anyone else up onto the anchor. The way he was calling out to his capitan like he couldn't believe Salazar would leave *him* behind, even if he ditched everyone else. He even had that "but...but I thought you loved me!" expression on his face.