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maxarchive · 25 days

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MAX-IMUM ATTACK 2017 Season Photos and words by Darren Heath

Monday lunchtime, Heathrow Terminal 5. Standing next to the slowly revolving baggage carousel, a fresh-faced, slightly awkward-looking - just out of his teens - young man is awaiting the arrival of his chattels.

Dressed in bland black trainers, similarly hued skinny jeans and an oversized hoody, this Young Turk ain’t winning any style awards. iPhone in hand, he’s busy swiping the screen in that head-bowed social media style billions of us now ‘enjoy’.

Max Verstappen doesn’t really do flash. He couldn’t look more ‘normal’. Yet put him in a racing car and he’s just about the most special talent to arrive on motor racing’s top step for decades.

Schumacher-esque – Michael of course! – is a term increasingly heard up and down the F1 paddock, such is the impact the Netherlands’ premier sportsman is now making.

I can see it too.

The fresh-faced 16-year-old boy who was, upon his arrival, so ignorantly dismissed by many within the sport is rapidly becoming a man. It’s amazing how quickly young sportsmen living life in the public gaze assume adulthood. Just take a look at Sebastian Vettel. The gawky kid of 2009 became the handsome dude of 2010!

What sets the potentially great apart from the mediocre? What makes Max Verstappen so, so much more special than, say, Carlos Sainz?

I guess it’s the whole package: the look; the mien; the steely character honed to be a racer almost from before he could walk; the utterly uncompromising way he dismisses any questioning of his racecraft; the toys-out-of-the-pram reaction to harsh penalties; the fast straight-out-of-the-box attacking style; and the rapier-like overtaking ability, the like of which we haven’t seen for many a year. Such was Max’s impact on the art of passing and defending, the rules had to be rewritten!

The way the car looks through the turns, the application of throttle, steering and immensely late braking. Metronomic in his blisteringly fast lap time delivery, this boy has the lot. He IS the future of Formula 1.

In so, so many ways – but let’s hope not all – Max is the new MSC.

Racing in an aggressive and forceful style often results in on-track contretemps with some of his more seasoned rivals. No matter, Max takes no prisoners, batting away questions about the legality of some of his racing moves with a dismissive arrogance that’s strangely appealing in its delivery.

Up to speed now and surely making Dan Ricciardo question his team-leading abilities, Verstappen is unquestionably Red Bull’s main man.

Off-track too, Max is sorted. Guided by his F1-experienced father, the young Verstappen has an able and well-qualified navigator at the helm. Learning from his own ill-advised 1990s F1 driving career decisions, Jos pays absolute attention so as to ensure his son maximises the opportunities on offer.

With top-drawer drivers in short supply, Red Bull had better make damned sure their 2019-and-beyond engine supply is top-notch. The bidding war for Max’s signature is already in full swing. Ferrari and Mercedes are enviously eyeing the Dutchman’s abilities with covetous desire.

It’s easy to forget that Max is only 20 years old. Way ahead in racing driver maturity - a relative term! – than so many millions of a similar age, Max has appeared mentally developed beyond his years since first he appeared in the F1 paddock at Spa 2014. It struck me then how entirely capable this 16-year-old boy was dealing with multiple language questions and untold camera lenses. Listening to his interrogator politely before answering calmly and intelligently, Max appeared born to the role…

Fast forward to now and Verstappen is a multiple grand prix winner and 2018 title-chasing challenger. Part of the new breed of F1 racers, Max leads the pack. Publicly respectful of his rivals, although privately dismissive of many, he well knows his place among the potentially great.

Michael Schumacher once opined – in an interview I photographed – that his father had advised him to heed well the arrival on the scene of the next great talent. The one who’d challenge and quickly replace the dominant male. Well, Lewis, Sebastian and Fernando, that man has arrived.

You’d best heed Herr Schumacher’s words well…

#max verstappen #f1 #2017

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verycharismaticdragon · 8 months

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Been thinking about Luo Binghe. As one does, but in this particular instance of why, waaaaaay before I actually like... understood large portions of his character and themes tied to it, I still came out of the novel having imprinted on him.

Because I've talked lately about how important it is to read deeply to actually understand him, but I definitely didn't do that on my first read. He was absolutely as confusing and weird to me as to any of the ppl that hate on him, I just. didn't feel the same despite seeing the same picture.

And after mulling this over, I think this is due to his character soothing a very particular anxiety for me. As a mentally ill neurodivergent person - and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one of those who feel this way - I have definitely wondered at times if I was much more difficult to love than ye average neurotypical. Not in the way of mental illness making one feel unlovable (though dam it sure does that.), but more in the "woah my symptoms are sure a handful to deal with, hard to imagine someone would sign up to do all that work on a life partnership scale" way.

And you see, in media you definitely get (positively portrayed) characters who have a similar problem. But the authors don't really... manage to portray those characters' concerns as having weight. Because they shy away from making those characters symptoms, well, too problematic - lest they actually become unlovable for the audience.

MXTX, however, goes full throttle with Luo Binghe. He's undeniably, glaringly difficult. He does so many things that he really shouldnt have (that he instantly regrets, actually), quite a few of those hurting the person he loves. He gets in his head so much he nearly causes an apocalyptic event over that person saying 'uh-huh' to someone else without even meaning it. He needs constant reassurances. "A handful" doesn't begin to describe him.

And... throughout all of that, he is loved. We are in the head of a guy who loves him. Who gets exasperated, and doesn't understand, and goes through a lot of shit because of Luo Binghe - and yet never stops just, loving him and caring about him, whatever happens.

So Luo Binghe is someone who is genuinely difficult to love - portrayed so without pulling any punches. Definitely more difficult than an average nd guy like me or u. But. He is portrayed as deserving of - and receiving - unconditional, boundless, and eventually commited love anyway. Even when it is actually, forgive the overused quote, rotten work.

He gets to have that.

Yeah, no fucking wonder I tucked him into my ribcage right next to my heart even before I really understood why.

#and once u actually start excavating the layers mxtx put in he is soooo interesting and fun #but even before that he really got me #luo binghe #svsss #svsss meta #(admittedly this is more 'svsss things i should probably talk thru in therapy' but still)

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sonicchaoscontrol · 1 year

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Alright, it’s close enough to the holiday here that we can go ahead and get started!

Hello! With all due sincerity, how are you? Have you been well?

It’s been a while, hasn’t it. Is this thing still on? Let me see if I can’t clear a few things up as the Moderator That Was, Once, And May Be Again. Read on for details, my friends! It’s long-winded, but I hope it suffices. If you’re new here, don’t worry about any of this, and simply enjoy the cheeky teaser. I’ll see you soon.

—---------

Of course, the obvious:

It wasn’t right of me to disappear. For three years it’s sat quietly as my greatest shame, and I still feel that guilt all the dang time. I was having such fun! This thing was on a roll! So…what happened in 2019? Truth is - I wasn’t ready. I had a lot of growing to do, both as a person and an artist, and I was winging it way more than I ever should have been allowed to get away with. Around the time I left, my living situation took a drastic turn for the worse, and I quickly arrived at every artist’s greatest enemy: Immense burnout. That shit sent me up in FLAMES. I was kindling in no time flat!

…So, like, what the hell man, where have I been in the years since? Twitter, mostly. Various MMOs. Discord, too. Learning and growing and finally getting my affairs in order. Are things okay now? Well, they’re a lot better than they were! Steady onwards. I’m out of that situation and on the mend. But lately? I’ve had this nagging itch in the back of my brain that it might be time to get back to where I feel I really belong. Revamp this shindig and fix it from the ground up, you know? It’s still a story I want to tell, but I feel that the time I’ve spent away has taught me a lot about how storytelling really works.

So what does the road look like from here?

Here’s how it’s gonna go - first, the fixes. I’d be functionally recycling the story in its current state, filling in the decade-old plotholes, and working with proper pacing ahead of time, instead of simply going page by page and seeing what happened (You don’t want to know what the old process looked like!). This time, updates would be sent out on a steadier, more reliable basis, instead of churning ahead at full throttle and reaching Burnout Station again. I don’t have an accurate estimate of how long this process will take or when new pages would be released, but I’d like to build up a little bit of a buffer, so we’ll see! At the time of this posting, several pages are already in the works - make of that what you will! I’ve also got an editor this time, for bonus points.

Secondly, the administrative aspect. Three years or so is a lot of time to lose grip on a website, and I haven’t actually USED this place in a while. So please bear with me while I make any necessary changes and see about adjusting things under the hood. Yes, the original discord was deleted. No, it doesn’t make it right. Yes, I have a new Sonic/SCC server that's waiting for the right time to go public. Communicate with me on that as we go - is that kind of hub still wanted? We’ll see.

This is an endeavor that will take time and patience, more than I feel I deserve after so suddenly ghosting everyone - mental illness and poor circumstance can make for a downright nasty combination, and I think we’re all juggling various struggles a few years into a worldwide pandemic. I ain’t special, I know a lot of us burned out like so many well-meaning meteors. But all that aside… I think I would like to try again. My inaction back then was borne of a terrible situation and no strength to keep the fire burning, but now? Now, I’m here, and ready to make the attempt.

I can’t promise immediate results, but the keyword here is ‘try’. Coming back to this place and seeing that there were still those hanging on, waiting to see if it would ever dig itself out of the snow? Warmed my heart like you would not believe. I don’t remember the state of mind I was in at the time, nor the current status of… a lot of things, actually, but y’know what, that’s okay. Clean slate. Fresh start. Powdered snow and broken ice.

You’re still here! You thought this was something worth waiting for! I will try my best to live up to that kindness, and do things the right way this time. Thank you for waiting for me.

Got ring? I do.

-Ness / RhythmCrown

#sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #sth #sonic #shadow #sonic comic #sonic fanart #hello gross amount of tags #and hello catharsis #mod post #mod draws #we all danced in fire; trapped in this machine #don't know how long we've waited; as the mod is watching #the code word is warp ring #please forgive me for my tag abundance #among other things #you'll probably also have to open that in a new tab because lol formatting

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nyxrev · 1 year

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Tsukuyomi ツクヨミ

alt. 月読、月夜見: Japanese Moon God, implied to be male, not major deity but has some tales, notably when he killed a food goddess at a feast bc he was disgusted by how she created food from her body. His sister-wife Sun Goddess Amaterasu, horrified by his action, was so angry she exiled him from Heaven and refused to look at him again, thus is how day-night separated as Sun & Moon never meet.

With our snotty sleazy God on the Moon, I must wonder if Tsukuyomi, lit. The Moon God Org., is related, as they seem so eager to fetch Psykos, the “Third Eye” who can see the future, who we know from the swirly planetary mental imagery, has had prior contact with God.

Chapter I: Apollo

——*Welcome to Moon Craters Highway Radio for road rage therapy and drive escapades, what a lovely sunny noon out here! All's calm yet why do I smell the musty rot of evil afoot? Whatever could it be?

We hear your engines rumble with excitement, so take a seat on the passenger's side as we go full throttle on a wild ride through the hearth of our roads! —Only at the Hero Association HQ~*

Commentary brought to you by Apollo's poison pill (still stuck in his eye help me out)

Of course, damp stagnant underground spaces, with lack of ventilation n ever loom of darkness, are the perfect ground for unhygienic practices, such as the proliferation of (virulent) microbes…

Why is it always the smiley mask suit man

Rich. Mysterious. Creepy. What an atmosphere.

He comes to collect samples for experiment on behalf of his assoc., “for research purposes,” he says humbly, but not surprised to see him refer to live human like an object. Mad scientist? No, meticulously evil scientist.

God I can smell his perfume two lots away and it reeks of evil, ill omen.

Which brand d'you bet the Moon agents wear? I throw Hugo as an option. Strong and obnoxious

Notice how a mere agent exudes enough latent, passive psychic energy for Fubuki to sense it? And she seems to feel it quite strongly. I expect him to be decently troublesome.

Oops… it would be all for naught if the precious brain gets damaged, now, wouldn't it… because as the rumoured “Third Eye” we heard so much about, the secret to future vision also lies here…he says, as cradles her head gently, coldly, with -out an ounce of affection, only ambition for an excellent sample acquired for nefarious deeds.

“Would you like to torture her?” “No need,” he replies, brief but courteous enough.

Now I'm not sure what he did to Psykos there, it looks like a psychic gunshot or taser, but clearly all they care about's her brain and what it holds. They may not torture her (doubt they wouldn't), but they would only keep her sane/alive enough to extract momentous pieces for their research.

ラボで開頭して隅々まで調べます

隅々まで sumizumi made (reduplicative): lit. to the end of every corner, every nook and cranny, all the ins and outs

調べる: to investigate, examine, check, look into

“We'll perform a craniotomy back at the lab to explore every nook and cranny”

No need for torture, they'll do much worse.

His way of speech makes my skeleton want to crawl out of my flesh.

Absolutely Unhinged.

I can't tell what emotion he has capacity for, but mb he's so surprised his pupils went o_o; or mb even it's his spark of idea expression to bait and catch Fubuki too. He has no eyebrows, must've exchanged them for maximum zappy. N why he look like a Demon Slayer chara except deflated.

Notice how exec went “Oi guards, can't you see our generous Mr. Sponsor is…” at Fubuki group, straight from diplomatic, an almost obsequious customer service voice* to an imperative voice of displeased authority.

*eg. prior scene when exec welcomed him with: お待ち申し上げておりました｡どうぞこちらへ｡ “We've expected you. Please, this way.” It's hard to explain but they used respectful language for every part there. It's humble deferential speech, expected formality, but the fact they're polite to an outsider w data (next) yet irritated by Fubuki and only scared when Tatsumaki comes… they know their shady deals can't be exposed.

Now as Tatsumaki cracks down the door roof to your crimes, fearsome as a tornado can be, I fell for their act like a diet pill down a beauty's tea.

“Don't interfere, you outsider!!” And she makes modern art out of our Moon agent.

Fear not, he is sturdy. And smart enough to knock out unneeded eyes of execs and security.

Don't we all love an ambidextrous multitasker?

“How convenient. I'll make you sisters souvenir too.” An excellent addition, if only you could get your hands on them so easily as you wish.

She yeet him so hard he lost his coat, or he took it off bc he activated Serious Solar Storm. Well, the starry Cosmic Garou shirt looks dapper but better not just toss your coat on the ground at a rival's house if it has your valuables.

His tie has a U crescent idk the specific term for but if I search without scientific names is weird. Prefer scientific detail til I can sort out the lores. Apparently, the moon is related to clairvoyance. Believe what you will but I feel Moon Readers of Tsukuyomi seek out prophecy not to be sought.

Maybe moon phases on their ties correspond to rank and power.He's just a henchman after all. If agents have phases, mb the boss has full moon. Mb also means “power” is completed, but I feel it is dangerous to reach completed power.

When we saw God crawl out of his crusty moon den, the moon was lit on top ◠ an angle difficult & unnatural from earth. If ◡ crescent is humans, opposite you reach God, “ascended” as Fubuki said. Except it's NOT somewhere to ascend. We already saw why not to connect with God.

So break my tangent, let's get back on track.

As his aura crackles with flames, our agent pats off dust and engages Tatsumaki. Heh, not bad… She looks down at him, literally and figuratively, a little lab rat should be no big deal for her, but,

Fubuki comments, “He's strong.” Perhaps not unmanageable, but def stronger than expected.

Sure enough, he starts off strong.

Fubuki may not be the strongest esper by sheer power output-wise, but she is not imperceptive. Remember when Gearsper's energy output was so strong she almost mistook it for her sister? When she senses power, she really senses it. So I'd trust her judgement of its strength at least.

Oof—the gust, the gales, what sandy breeze on our sails. Guess he can hold his own, for now.

Let's take a moment to appreciate Murata's flex of artistic muscles before moon agent tires out.

“…I may be at a slight disadvantage…” Slight??Pathetic, Tatsumaki ridicules.

Your starry scars look about to burst, heed your limit, man. You'll get dust in your eyes- oh oops, I'll shut it, I'm an ill omen. Bite my tongue Bide my time Baby I'm not even here

“Poor Guinea Pig”

“Hmph, you needn't belittle me so, you know…” I do wonder if you can still keep on your air of condescension if you know what I'm about to do.

Did she really just call him a “Pitiful Marmot”?

モルモット: transliteration - marmot.

I thought it strange for marmot to mean guinea pig as an experiment animal like an equivalent of lab rat, so I dug round, turns out it's historical language confusion, not much we can do about it now. What's the unfortunate chosen animal of your language(s)?

Tbh, I'd add Pitiful Marmot to my vocabulary, for most affectionate purposes, of course.

It looks like she hit the nail on the head cuz her slight hurt the artificial esper's pride enough to set off the next step of Apollo's mission.

Now y'all done it. He broke the capsule! sleepy…

No! You Fool. Afoollo Why you gotta expose me like that. Why'd you out your strategy?! You had Data yet can't grasp her ability??! Thought you could outsmart and overpower her? Fool. You just jeopardized your precious junior's effort and lost your trump card. Well, I don't know how precious he is to you but you should prolly cherish him a little for he's considerate enough to bail you out of your stupid mistakes and drive you home with a bloody concussion.

“Natural Espers are a defective species. Perish.”

Brother your logic is defective. If natural espers didn't exist how can artificial ones like you ever exist hah? You even need existent natural ones alive to create your artificial comrades.

I must ask though, what did he mean with they “lack balance and harmony”? Did he mean they rely on psychic power so much they're physically weak??

His face just gets creepier. Then he pulls a stunt and I wonder if Tatsumaki rly had a hard time or just let him get the illusion of victory to locate the pill. —*More on Apollo's Mission next post.

Notes:

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hangmanssunnies · 1 year

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Sorry it’s taken me so long, and I’m sorry to be bothering you again. But I told you I’d reread the whole series front to back when part 3 came out, I’m just 2 months late to the party and I apologize for that

I could tell when Jake first called the reader “my love” that things were changing. Every nerve in my body was vibrating with anticipation for what was to come. And the bed frame and dual table set just like Russell and Miss Celeste? Be still my beating heart 😭

I don’t think I realized how well they fit together until part 3. How Jake’s particularness is a turnoff for most people but the reader is happy to do that, or how Jake is always so soft and understanding when the reader gets triggered. Maybe they’ve always fit together so well, but I think they grew together and like you had said went full throttle with their relationship. Or at least after Jake came back from the shorter deployment and things went south. The culmination and stars aligning moment towards the end of the story made everything worth it. All of the miscommunications, and all of the words left unsaid because they were too scared or not ready. It was beautiful, thank you so much for allowing us to take this ride with you

And I know I don’t sound super emotional I just finished shedding tears from this story and I’m in full dissociation mode yay mental illness, but this is truly one of my favorite stories of all time. Thank you again 😭❤️

Oh my friend!!! You are never a bother at all! I am so happy that you got around to reading the end. I don't blame you for taking a while. Honestly, I think it's a bit outrageously long. I apologize that it's taken me a few days to respond. Timliness is unfortunately not a strong suit of mine. I appreciate you taking the time at all to read my work, and then the extra time to send me an ask letting me know some of your thoughts. 💕

The bed frame and dual table set!!! Ahhh gosh. I’m so pleased that you enjoyed that. When I was writing the ending I was struggling to like any of the ways Jake confessed his feelings in across the different drafts. Then I came back to Russ and Celeste and the fact that they are probably the only example of genuine love that Jake saw in his life growing up so thats what he panicked and defaulted to. He was like 🤔🤔🤔 okay well miss Celeste made Pops a bed set and then they spent their lives together… the obvious reason is the bed set which I don’t have. 🤨💡

Thank you again for you kind words and for willingly riding the rollercoaster that is house we share.

#house we share ask #1 million <3 for you!#coley's quorum

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daydreamerdrew · 2 years

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I am thinking about the development of Betty’s character and her role in the stories up to the point (early 1971) that I’m at in Hulk comics.

If I remember correctly, prior to the reveal that Bruce is the Hulk, that Betty was more of a girl that Bruce had vague feelings for but tragically couldn’t be with due to his terrible secret, and that it wasn’t until after Bruce and the Hulk’s true relationship was revealed that Betty firmly became Bruce’s girlfriend.

But after that reveal, Bruce and the army supporting characters became less and less prominent in stories as Bruce no longer had a job as a military scientist tying him to them and the Hulk being on the run meant that he transformed back into Bruce less and fought other monsters more than he fought the army. It wasn’t until Roy Thomas starting writing at the end of 1969 that Bruce and the other human characters came back into extended prominence.

During that phase where there was much more Hulk than Bruce, Betty acted as a damsel in distress for both the military characters and the Hulk to have to save, which meant that she fainted A Lot.

At the same time, I think she showed a bit of gumption at points because of her insistence that the Hulk would never hurt her and her dedication to Bruce. For example, running towards the Hulk when he’s starting a rampage while everyone else is running away to try to calm him down and to protect him from the military. This also reads to me like an unhealthy lack of concern for her own well-being. There’s one issue where she sees Bruce in trouble and immediately fully commits to driving her car full-throttle into the monster attacking him. It doesn’t help that we don’t really know anything about her outside of her role in the conflict between Hulk and the military, so she seems to only exist in different levels of freaking out about Bruce.

Since Bruce has been brought back into prominence, so has Betty as Bruce repeatedly tries and fails to live a normal life with her. These repeated attempts and set-backs seem to have taken a toll on Betty, who reacted with bigger and bigger breakdowns before finally being hospitalized when she believes that Bruce has become stuck inside the Hulk forever and blames her father for it with lots of screaming and crying and such.

Betty is under a lot of stress with worrying that her father will kill her boyfriend, or that her boyfriend will kill her father, or that her boyfriend will be stuck inside a monster forever and that she’ll never see him again.

I’m not sure if this was being written with her specific character in mind or if this all was intended as a more general ‘hysterical female’ thing.

The Hulk will at some point go through a recontextualization that frames the character through mental illness, right now there’s nothing to suggest that Bruce had any issues before the gamma bomb but I know that Bruce and the Hulk are later given a backstory with a history of domestic violence. I believe I’m right before the introduction of the therapist character Doc Samson.

I wonder if Betty will also get any sort of exploration of her mental health issues.

#marvel #betty ross #my posts

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reapxrs · 2 months

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𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑬𝑹 𝑺𝑯𝑬𝑬𝑻

𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐬 !

FULL NAME. Autumn Elizabeth Bailey NICKNAME. Calla, Cal GENDER. Cis Woman HEIGHT. 5’6” AGE. 26 ZODIAC. Scorpio SPOKEN LANGUAGES. ASL, English

𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬 !

HAIR COLOR. Jet black EYE COLOR. Brown-black SKIN TONE. 9 BODY TYPE. Built like a brick shithouse. She looks like she benchpresses cars for fun. Almost twice as wide as her wife. VOICE. Sharp and quick, unless the person she’s talking with isn’t fluent in ASL, then she makes an effort to slow down enough to catch. Usually, though, she lets Dahlia translate for her as needed, but if Dahl or Freesia aren’t around her speaking voice is slow and careful and even - she was subjected to too much speech therapy for it not to be. DOMINANT HAND. Right POSTURE. Loose and easy, hands usually free to talk SCARS. Burns on her arms from learning how to work on cars that hadn’t cooled down yet TATTOOS. Scythe on left shoulder, handle stretching half to her elbow, a faded black band around her left ring finger, Dahlia’s full name in Hebrew over her heart BIRTHMARKS. A mole half the diameter of a dime on her neck, almost hidden at her hairline. MOST NOTICEABLE FEATURE(S). &nbsp Her hands

𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 !

PLACE OF BIRTH. NYC HOMETOWN. Williamsburg, Brooklyn SIBLINGS. None that she’s aware of, but there might be some on her father’s side PARENTS. Kimberley Bailey, mother. Andrew Leeward, father. She doesn’t have much memory of him.

𝐚𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 !

OCCUPATION. Mechanic CURRENT RESIDENCE. Apartment above the garage CLOSE FRIENDS. Dahlia, Freesia, Daisy, Rose RELATIONSHIP STATUS. Married to Dahlia FINANCIAL STATUS. Barely breaking even most months, but breaking even. Rose helps. DRIVER’S LICENSE. Yes, and motorcycle licence since someone has to be able to drive Rose’s bike if she can’t. CRIMINAL RECORD. Car theft, destruction of property, assault and battery, assault with a deadly weapon, armed robbery VICES. Fast cars and good food

𝐬𝐞𝐱 & 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 !

SEXUAL ORIENTATION. queer PREFERRED EMOTIONAL ROLE. submissive | dominant | switch. PREFERRED SEXUAL ROLE. submissive | dominant| switch. LIBIDO. Zero to sixty in 0.68 seconds TURN ONS. Feeling the rumble of a good engine through her seat, adrenaline rush from a car with good pick up and opening the throttle on a straightaway, her wife TURN OFFS. Fuckboys who think they know cars better than her, fuckboys who hit on her wife, fuckboys LOVE LANGUAGE. quality time RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES. Eternal, unwavering devotion. She’s been in love with Dahlia since they were 5, and she’s still just as devoted now

𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 !

CHARACTER’S THEME SONG. Can’t Fight Against The Youth, P!atD HOBBIES TO PASS TIME. Cooking, trying to mimic the dishes Dahlia’s mom used to make them. MENTAL ILLNESSES. Some trauma reactions but not enough to be classified as PTSD LEFT OR RIGHT BRAINED. Fairly even PHOBIAS. Her mother finding where she is, small enclosed spaces SELF CONFIDENCE LEVEL. A little low, but not enough to interfere with her work VULNERABILITIES. Dahlia, Daisy

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unkn0wnusererr0r · 3 months

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It’s not a new thought but it is a frequent one. What am I doing here? I don’t know how to life, everything is exhausting. My brain is a hamster wheel that never stops doom spinning. I’m 25 and don’t know myself at all, which isn’t an original feeling or thought but it still exists in my chest. My chest that feels so heavy and tight an elephant could be sitting on it all the time. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always waiting to be dropped. The scariest part I don’t know that I would feel anything at this point if I were dropped. I’m so exhausted from feeling like a burden and like my mental illness is an inconvenience even when I am full throttle giving it all I’ve got. I just don’t want to feel that way anymore, I don’t want to be making life harder for other people to live because I have a hard time living. I hate being so codependent but I also don’t know how not to be because of how my relationship with attachment formed. It feels like it’s an inconvenience the amount of physical affection that I seek. I don’t want to be viewed as a nag for wanting the soft (and no so 🤣) parts of a relationship, I want the intimacy and excitement. I want there to be the same drive to at least want to feel close. I mull it over and have two doom spirals before I can even get the guts to even try and come on to you and get blown off every time… sometime I just want to stick my boyfriends dick in my mouth (among other places) without it being a big deal but also not forgettable. I wish I could just remove my emotions because it would be so much easier to live my life without feeling everything too much ALL the time. The thoughts and voices never stop, it’s like they are on loop. There is no escaping. I don’t know how to be alone but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be… my needs are too heavy for other people, there is no time to learn how to support me or help me regulate, which isn’t even a dig towards anybody. It’s just true, there is not time or space and I don’t want take away from other family stuff. I don’t feel like I really have a lot of redeeming qualities or aspects. There is not a reason for me to be around if I don’t present any positives.

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bubblegum-sullivan-13 · 10 months

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I think a lot of people fall for call outs and online moral panics just to be safe than sorry. Like I don't know a lot about kink. I don't look at porn and to be honest and really show my ignorance I can tell a lick of difference between any anime. It all looks the same to me. The porn or the not porn. The Japanese imperial apologia or the regular. But my motto with any kind of accusations is trust but verify but a lot of people just go full throttle with the believe "x people" mentality. So I can see a lot of people just going with the flow. And though it ain't common place there are people that abuse the trust they're given in leftwing and social justice spaces and exploit the well meaning but ill informed ally.

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kindlelovers · 1 year

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🍪🍪Out of the Pantry: A Disordered Eating Journey🍪🍪 by ✍Ronni Robinson

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Pre-teen Ronni is a seemingly normal #girl growing up in the suburbs, until the day her mom hides #cookies. Soon after, Ronni has an unexplainable #compulsion to #eat more and more and more #junk. In #secret and #shame, she overeats and binges through tween years, high #school, #college, an #abusive first #marriage, and even a loving second marriage. Over thirty years, she #steals #food, eats food off of others' plates, and #scavenges food out of the trash, until one night, once again stuffed after a binge, on TV, she hears the words “compulsive #overeater.”

She searches and she learns she has an #EatingDisorder, a mental illness, a disease. Armed with this knowledge she attacks her compulsion full throttle.

#Kindle #Book #ebook #reading

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thetiredandretiredavenger · 2 years

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“Okay my plan is to go at this full throttle for the first part, and then succumb to the mental illness to get through the second part.”

I hate to say it because in theory it’s somewhat entertaining to think about, but this is not a good plan.

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standingontheoverpassscreaming · 2 years

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No one ever talks about the part of mental illness recovery where all feelings feel like they’re kinda muted because you were so used to experiencing everything at full fucking throttle. I think I’m at the best state I’ve been mentally but I can’t help but miss the intensity because the worst feelings made me create and the best feelings felt like literally magic and now it’s just vibin.

#personal #ignore #it’s better tho

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mallratsys · 3 years

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Me when yr mom uh um uh yr mom

| He/They | Mutual Interaction Only |

#mallwrites #rewatching The Walten Files while drinkin a Full Throttle energy drink @ 1am? call that mental illness

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sorryimanon · 4 years

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Pairings: Bakugou Katsuki x fem!Reader, Izuku Midoriya x NB!Reader

Warnings: some angst, FLUFF, and our boys being the best boys.

In which they comfort you after a rough day or week

A/N: im sorry if Izukus section is shorter than Bakugou’s. trying to practice writing other characters. enjoy!

Saturday's are reserved strictly by the majority of the girls from class 1-A, leaving the guys to hibernate inside their dorms as they allow the commencement of girls night. You've never rain checked nor rejected the idea of spending quality time with your friends, considering all the tribe's and trepidation's everyone has endured together during their time at the academy. It's nice to just strip away the stress and dip your toes in pure relaxation.

Unfortunately, you woke up with a bad case of cloudy thoughts. For the past week you've been carrying the weight of dread, causing your mood to drastically change throughout the day. You'd be having a civil conversation with someone one minute and then the next minute you're completely irritated by their presence. You've tried to balance it out and fix it overnight with the regimes you researched on the internet. A new sleeping schedule, healthier diet, yoga, and even went to the extreme of writing in a journal. It was all so cut throat and prestigious, nothing close to your liking. Katsuki made fun of you for it one day when he snuck into your room and read the many inscriptions in your journal entries.

"This stuff reminds of Deku. Always shoving his nose in that stupid notebook of his," he didn't care much to hear your refutes about Izuku. "Anyways, what's with all this depressing shit you are writing? You don't really feel this way do you?"

You didn't give him a definite answer that day. Only a curt "no" and he resumed rambling about his day like nothing happened, having you listening with his voice like white noise going in one ear and out the other.

And that's how it went on throughout the duration of the prior week before Saturday.

Inside the confinement of your dorm, you made the rational decision to sleep in instead of attending classes. The chilling thoughts kept you up all night, never once allowing sleep to take full throttle. You tossed and turned around on your bed, unable to shut off your brain. So when you woke up in the peak of late afternoon, you weren't surprised to see the unread messages on your phone. All of them were from your explosive boyfriend.

King Explosion🤍: Oi you running late? Mr.Sleepy head is taking roll call

King Explosion🤍: y/n where tf r u?

King Explosion🤍: fine don't answer me ig

King Explosion🤍: are you at least coming down for lunch? i made curry last night and imma make you finish it

King Explosion🤍: fking hurry before dunce face eats it

King Explosion🤍: nvm he ate it 😐

Katsuki never intended for the message to be funny. He's probably blowing actual steams of smoke through his nostrils and ears while chasing kamanari amongst the halls. The comical imagery made you laugh harder. At least he made you crack a smile. You haven't shown any emotions let alone a hint of enthusiasm for tonight.

Maybe it'd be best to sit this one out.

"Hey, we're missing a person! Where's my y/n?" Mina asked after scanning the group of girls huddled around on the carpeted floor.

Momo shifted uncomfortably on the cushioned pillow she stole from the couch. "Y/N said she wasn't feeling too well to join us for tonight. Something about food poisoning and throwing up every hour."

In unison all the girls gasped, along with a concerned 'ribbit' from Tsuyu.

"Well I hope she gets to feeling better. I wouldn't want her to endure such sickness for much longer," Tsuyu croaked out.

Everyone in the circle agreed and promised to pay a visit later in the night to check on you.

On the fourth floor, Katsuki stared blankly at his phone, hands shaking due to the repressed anger he's been holding. Each of the messages he sent previously were all left on read, including the one he sent an hour ago asking if he could have a cuddle session with you before girls night. Yes, even an ill tempered guy such as him enjoys sappy shit like cuddling. After pacing back and forth in his room for a solid 5 minutes, he was now dead set on confronting you in front of your friends.

Katsuki made a beeline for the elevator and aggressively pressed the 1st floor button repeatedly in hopes it'll make the process go quicker. He reached the commons area in precision time, overhearing the girls giggle after someone suggested playing truth or dare. He towered over Uraraka's figure, casting a demonic shadow version of himself in the circle. Hagakure shrieked and clung onto Jirou.

"Where's y/n you extras?" He demanded, voice deafening the brunette under him.

"She didn't come tonight. She's in her dorm room sick," Jirou explained to him as she tried pry the invisible girl off her arm.

"Like hell she's sick!" Katsuki spun around quickly and retreated back to the elevator, mumbling obscenities under his breath. "She's going to pay for being so careless and irresponsible."

The commons room fell silent once the explosive blonde disappeared behind the doors of the elevator, all eyes searching each other in complete shock. Uraraka was the first to speak out of the small group.

“Should we warn y/n that Bakugou is coming for her?”

Jirou averted her gaze to the direction bakugou left off from, a ghost of a smirk spreading on her face.

“Nah. Knowing y/n, she can handle the asshole on her own.”

King Explosion🤍: can i come over? i wanna cuddle, i miss u

The text message kept flashing behind your eyes every-time you closed them - a sad image of Katsuki waiting impatiently for you to reply back with a heart or one of those unusual memes he unapologetically adores. You knew he’d be furious, no doubt about it, but you rationalized your decision and concluded it would be best to avoid your boyfriend like the plague till this undesired feeling dissipates. Katsuki doesn’t do well with people being emotional, let alone handle his own emotions for god’s sake.

Your own thoughts were interrupted by someone raping the outside of your door. The continuous knocks made your head spin, a painful sting ghosting back and forth between your eyes. Remembering back to an hour ago, you messaged one of the girls that you weren’t going to make it to tonight’s session. Surely they respected your wishes and continued on with their hangout? But you forgot about the one person who’s persistent and stubborn like a cat.

“I know you’re in there y/n! You may have fooled your idiotic friends with a lie, but you keep on forgetting you’re terrible at lying!” Katsuki hollers against the wood of the door, not once being considerate of those living above her.

He’s right. You’re absolutely horrible at making up excuses for yourself. Dating someone as intuitive as him will be the death of you.

“If there’s something going can you at least let me in? You can’t ignore me forever y/n.”

Again, he’s right.

You slipped out from the comfort of your bed and padded towards the door, mentally preparing for the blonde to scold you once he enters your room. What you weren’t prepared for was the tears swelling up in the ducts of his vermillion eyes - his hands clenched tightly into fists as he looked down at you. Your breathing hitched when his arm outstretched to rest on the door frame to keep his trembling body steady.

“What the hell y/n? Why the fuck have you been ignoring me?! Did I do something wrong?!” He asked, not caring about his current appearance.

You grab ahold of his other arm and absentmindedly started rubbing it affectionately, trying to coax him into calming down. “Katsuki no! You didn’t do anything wrong! Why would you think that?”

“Because dumbass, you’ve been distant this past week,” he paused, choking on his words. “Are...are you breaking up with me?”

Your eyes shot up instantly at his horrifying assumption. “Katsuki, if I tell you the truth, will you promise not to make things worse for me?”

He tilted his head in confusion, but nodded once you led him into your messy bedroom. Once inside, your boyfriend plopped down on your bed, watching intently as you anxiously bit down on your nails - a nervous habit you picked up at the beginning of the school year.

��I’ve been feeling weird lately. Ever since the beginning of last week. I don’t know how to describe it but, my brain is constantly feeding into my already negative state. Telling me things I know aren’t true but I’ve convinced myself they are. Almost as if a grey cloud is hovering above me,” tears were already starting to pour down your cheeks. “I just...I just feel so miserable and lonely and useless and irritated and- I’m so sorry for ignoring you. You probably want nothing to do with me after this!”

You manage to turn away from the sight of the blonde during your speech, ashamed of pouring out your emotions onto a person who disregards other peoples emotions and constitutes them as a quote on quote “pussy”.

From behind, you can hear faint shuffling nearing your already shaken up figure. A pair of muscular arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you into a wall that could only be described as his own chiseled chest, doing the same as you did moments ago with his arm - lulling you to calm down a notch before he stared speaking.

“If you been feeling this way, why lie when I asked you a few days ago after reading your journal?”

“I know how you are, Katsuki. You get very uncomfortable when people talk about their feelings. So, why should I be any different?”

Your boyfriend suddenly maneuvers you around in the circle of his arms, shifting to where you’re now making direct eye contact with him. His gaze intense and unwavering.

“Because you’re my girlfriend? I don’t give a rats ass about any of these extras. When it comes to you, I’d make an exception for. I made that promise to myself when we first started seeing each other. So don’t think for a second that I’ll disregard your true feelings, dumbass.” He stepped a couple of inches backwards, ankles eventually hitting the bottom of your bed - making him fall and dragging you along with him. You landed on top of him, head still buried in the depths of his hard chest. The vibrations of his chuckle shook your whole body. Katsuki gently titled your head to be leveled with his, a red tint of blush painting his pallid cheeks.

“I’m being serious though. Don’t be afraid to come to me when things get tough, okay? I love you too much to see you like this.”

Next thing you knew your boyfriend stole your breath away by meshing his plump lips onto yours, hands snaking their way into your hair and carefully massaging it. By all means, you let him have his way with you by kissing the sadness away, tears puddling together cheek on cheek.

He let go eventually, pecking a quick chaste kiss on the side of your mouth before hauling you further into the bed. You settled on letting him spoon you, knowing how much he likes the feeling of your backside pressed against him, and the fruity aroma of your hair infiltrating his senses.

“I promise Katsuki,” you said after some time during the cuddle session.

He shifted in his spot, head placed firmly in the crook of your neck. “Promise what?”

“That I’ll come to you when these thoughts return again. I should trust you by now, and I need to not let these emotions ruin everything in my life. I love you that much.

Your confession swelled the very last evidence of Katsuki being a human being, his heart.

He smiled weakly to himself and nuzzled more into your shoulder, brushing his warm lips against the tender skin. “You better, dumbass.”

Today was just so exhausting, and the big fat 'D-‘ written in red ink on your final report was the icing on the cake. To make things even worse, Aizawa reminded the whole class before the exam that this was to determine wether or not if you'll be joining the training camp that'll commence the following winter break.

Hopefully this was one of your teacher's terrible deception tactics into making everyone do their absolute best, go plus ultra even. But to your dismay, he was indeed very serious of the matter this time.

It wasn't your fault, not entirely. You stayed up all night listening to another one of your boyfriends rambles, the conversation lasting till 2 am. Izuku grew worrisome and anxious ever since his encounter with a gruesome villain, thus resulting in him to pour his emotions out onto you. Poor baby kept mentioning the safety of All Might and you.

Solemnly, you left class and trailed back to your dorm room, wanting to ignore the jovial atmosphere inside the cramped room as everyone traded and talked about their scores.

Izuku noticed you leaving abruptly and got up from his desk to follow you behind, bidding a quick goodbye to his friends.

Your room was dark and dramatically colder than usual, a trickle of light threatening to pour in from the cascading sunset. You laid down on your stomach with one of your pillows propped on your head, in hopes to shield away anyone from seeing your ugly-crying face.

Too late because Izuku was already standing outside your dorm room, swaying back and forth on his feet while biting down harshly on his lip. He can hear your soft cries seeping through the door. He doesn't know why he's hesitating, he's your boyfriend after all.

Moments later you hear the acute sounds of someone knocking on your door, followed by the soft spoken voice of your green haired boyfriend.

"Baby? Can I come in? I-If that's okay with you I m-mean! It's alright if you need some space but you left class so early I figured something happened to you and I got really worried because you always wait for Iida and uraraka to walk us back to the dorms as a group and maybe it had something to do with what I was telling you last night-."

You crack the door just a smidge before fully opening it, revealing your bloodshot eyes and tear stained shirt to him. His breathing hitched once his eyes fixated on your disheveled state.

"Can you comfort me? I need you right now Izuku," your voice cracked a little, throat still tight after the crying session.

His strong, lean arms wrapped around your body momentarily, encasing you into a bear hug. Hugs from Izuku were amazing, no exceptions. He placed a quick peck on the crown of your forehead.

"C'mon, let's get inside and snuggle. How does that sound?" he asked as he unwrapped himself and took your trembling hand, leading you back inside the dimly lit room.

Izuku laid you gently down on your side once reaching the bed, crawling alongside with you before draping the covers over the both of you. His familiar hands snake around your waist and nudges you to roll over. You obliged and shifted your body to face his, sparkly green eyes staring straight at you.

"Tell me, what's wrong baby? Does it have to do with the recent exam?" his thumb started tracing delicate lines on your hips, your uniform long gone and now replaced with comfortable clothes instead.

"I failed Izuku...I did so terrible on the written exam. I kept falling in and out of sleep during the test that I didn't have time to finish the middle portion of it," you exhaled a shaky breath. "Who knows what'll happen on the practical. I'll probably fail that too...I'm such a failure compared to everyone."

Izuku grabbed the tender flesh of your cheeks and directed your vision to level with his. He looked angry and concerned.

"Don't say that y/n! You're not a failure! That exam doesn't determine wether or not if you're good enough to be a hero. I've seen you in action hun, and I know for a fact that you're possibly the most strongest person I've met in my lifetime! You're ambitious, smart, determined, and so freaking beautiful." He then kissed you tenderly on the lips, his eyes closing slightly due to the contact.

"So...freaking...beautiful." He whispers against your mouth.

His sentimental words were enough for you to push back the negativity and simply enjoy the intimate moment.

Izuku lifted his head away from your face to rest it against your temple. "You're going to do great things, okay? One failing grade isn't going to be the end of the world. Trust me sweetheart, I've had my fair share in failures during our time here in Yuuei. But look at me now, still standing."

You nuzzled more into his chest, tickling his chin with your hair. Faintly, you can hear the pitter patter of his heart beat bursting through his rib cage.

"Would you love me even if I was a horrendous looking-failure?" you were clearly teasing him, but sometimes Izuku became dense when it came to that.

"Y/n! W-Why would you ask that! Of course I would you dummy! I'd love you no matter what."

This time you return the favor and kiss him, knowing how to easily fluster him in seconds. He whimpers into your mouth at the sudden contact and cups your jawline affectionately.

The two of you stayed like that till the moon shone through the balcony curtains, illuminating your skin in a dusty glow.

Lips bruised and swollen red, you laid lifelessly in his arms, letting him wove his scarred fingers through your hair. Izuku would occasionally stop to peck your lips, then resumes his attention back to your hair.

"I'm sorry by the way. I shouldn't have kept you up last night before the exam. I'm such a horrible boyfriend..." he admitted suddenly.

"Yes. Yes you are."

He gasped and stopped his movements altogether, obviously taken aback by your blunt words.

You giggled and said, "Kidding. You're the best boyfriend. Apology accepted.”

After hearing that, Izuku shoved himself onto your chest and let out muffled cry. "D-Don't scare me like that. Almost made me have a heart a-attack!"

#mha imagines #mha x reader #bakugou headcanons #bakugou x reader #bakugou x y/n #bnha bakugou #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugou x you #bakugou fluff #bakugou imagine #bnha izuku #midoriya izuku #izuku x you #izuku x reader #midoriya x y/n #midoriya x you #midoriya headcanons #deku x you #deku x reader

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