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thedovecollector · 2 years

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this sickness in me

CW: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat. Necro, canonical incest mention, rape mention, regret, throwing up, minor character death, vague ending, drunk sex, hints of unrequited Geraskier

Summary: Jaskier thought she’d simply fallen asleep, and had been too desperate to get off to stop, but no amount of shaking her after would wake her up. It plagued him for months after, but when every moment is filled with horror, eventually the morbid becomes the mundane - and he stops being able to bury the sickness in him.

For @thepassifloradiscord and the team bingo - loving the DD prompts already

The first time had been an accident. Too much wine, too long since his last good fuck, Jaskier hadn't noticed anything was wrong when he'd taken the whore to bed. She'd draped herself over an empty cart in the now empty market, and Jaskier hadn't given a single fuck beyond getting his cock in her, ignoring the rain and not even considering how uncomfortable the cell would be if he was caught fucking in public.

Wouldn't have been the first time he'd been caught, and he didn't care. Not when the wine had him so numb, not when he wanted to bury himself in her and forget everything else.

She'd stopped moving at some point. As disgusting as it might have been, Jaskier just assumed she'd passed out, and he'd been too desperate to get off to stop. So he'd fucked her until he shook through an orgasm, collapsing onto her after, a breathless laugh escaping him as he pushed his rain soaked hair out of his face.

Except no amount of nudging or shaking her after would wake her up. She hadn't been asleep.

It had been an accident, and Jaskier hadn't fucked anyone else for months after, shaking when he thought about it. He'd panicked and left her there, puked his guts out when he was far away, and had been down right miserable for weeks. For a few horrid days he'd even wondered if it'd been his cock that killed her - he'd had a good laugh at himself over that once the sobbing stopped.

With enough wine, he was sure he'd forget about it. It certainly worked here and there, but once Geralt waltzed right back into his life like he hadn't shattered his heart to pieces, well. Being constantly drunk while on the road with a monster hunter wasn't the brightest of ideas. Geralt was a magnet for trouble, no matter how much he wanted to stay out of it, and Jaskier made less coin when he was constantly moving about. What little coin he made was stretched thin between cobblers, food, and a place to stay out of the rain.

It would come back to him at the oddest of moments. Passing a whore on the street, she'd smile at him in just the right way, and he'd remember the lifeless way that woman's mouth had dropped open. How her eyes had glassed over, how her fingers and arms were limb, not even given enough time to stiffen up properly. Jaskier would shiver and fake his best smile back, and get away as fast as he could, desperate for a drink or for Geralt to snap at him or- or anything to make him forget again, just for a moment.

But the morbid became the mundane so easily around those he kept company. Yennefer with her dead animal parts for potions, Geralt reeking of monster guts and not batting an eyelash when a king fell in love with his own sister. Ciri had gotten a right taste of bloodlust at some point in their travels, having less restraint than her dear witcher father, hunting down any rapist she heard of and making them scream before she relieved the world of them.

Geralt didn't approve. Yennefer did. And between all of that and how Jaskier's nightmare plagued him at every corner, at some point it just...it stopped making him cringe in horror. At some point, Jaskier saw a dead whore being gently placed in a cart, a priest praying over her before she was to be buried, and instead of his mouth turning dry and his legs feeling like jelly he just...wondered if she was still warm.

The second time was no accident.

Jaskier had tried to fuck around. After a few months it was getting hard to not, even plagued with nightmares as he was. But he'd feel a cold patch on their leg from the night air and he'd be unable to breathe, they'd stop moaning for but a moment and he'd flinch before his fingers would fly to their wrist. It was too much and too weird, and he was tired of the odd looks it earned him.

With them hiding from so much of the world (Nilfgaard, basically every witch in existence, and Jaskier was pretty sure farmers had something personal against him), Geralt's contracts were fewer and far between. Which meant that each one he managed to get was critical, no matter how little it paid. Everyone usually pitched in somehow, and considering Jaskier was the only one who couldn't explode someone's head if need be he always got the easy parts.

A cursed little girl had been haunting the slums of this town for a good few weeks, and one important part of freeing her from the curse was a flower that only grew in the damp and dark. Jaskier cursed his life and luck as he shoved the door to the catacombs open, coughing as the dust and dirt was disturbed.

It would have been so much easier for Geralt with a cat potion. For Yen, who could have made her hands glow or some shit while she walked down the grimy hallways. But instead it was Jaskier, with his torch and squinting, barely able to make his way around without stumbling over some rocks or bones that had been carelessly left about the place.

Animal bones, he hoped. Or didn't hope. He didn't want to even think about it.

He'd found the flower with little real issue. Getting out was the problem. He wandered for twice as long as it'd taken him to get to the damned things, cursing the whole while, and had given up no less than three times before he finally saw some light up ahead. It couldn't have been where he'd come from but he didn't care, following the flicker of torches up ahead. Any way out was better than being stuck down here with centuries' dead rich bastards - and the unlabeled piles of peasant bones were wearing on him.

Up ahead was a well lit room. No door barred his entrance as Jaskier stepped into it, his eyes adjusting to the light, and he breathed a sigh of relief as he saw an actual door that would get him out of this hell hole. But as he stepped towards it something else caught his attention, making him pause.

In the middle of the room was a stone table. Upon it was a young man who could have been mistaken for being asleep if it wasn't for how still he was. His eyes and mouth were closed, face almost peaceful in death, though the stab wound on his bare chest said he'd not gone peacefully at all.

Jaskier's first thought was simply 'what a shame', and he couldn't help but step towards him. The light flickered across his handsome features, though it did nothing to warm him. Running his fingers down the man's bare thigh, Jaskier felt his first cold, dead body.

He shouldn't have been there. Disturbing this man's final hours before he was buried. Something twisted in his gut over it even as his fingers wouldn't stop, finding it curious that the man wasn't stiff - weren't bodies supposed to be impossible to move? And yet he was pliant under Jaskier's fingers, knee bending with ease, easily enough that Jaskier's heart flew into his throat and his eyes scanned the man's face for any hint that this was a trick, a trap, anything but an actual dead body laying here.

But the man didn't move, not unless Jaskier moved him. And when Jaskier lifted his leg up far enough the small cloth that had protected the last remnants of the man's modest slipped right off to the floor, his soft cock exposed to the air.

Jaskier's mouth went dry, but no panic found him. A different memory hit him then, of clumsy hands and terrible kisses - his first semester at Oxenfurt, far away from his fear of his own father, and the only time he'd ever let himself admit he'd craved the touch of another man.

Decades ago. He'd buried those urges and the memories like he had so many other things, drowning it in wine. But a dead man's tongue couldn't get him into any trouble.

He couldn't stop himself from reaching out. Even as his stomach twisted, as he tasted acid at the back of his throat, his fingers wrapped around that pretty cock. The skin was soft and cool, it felt so good in his hand. Jaskier's breathing picked up, tongue flicking out to wet his lips as he leaned over to watch the man's cock, wondering what it would be like to feel it fill out, see it twitch, feel it in his mouth-

Jaskier's hand jerked back as he gagged, doubling over, clutching the stone table until his knuckles turned white. Tears stung his eyes as he tried to keep his dinner down, but his own thoughts sickened him. Tasting a dead man's cock, even wanting to, Jaskier shook from how wrong it was, how it made his stomach clench itself into knots.

No. He couldn't, he wouldn't. And he told himself that, over and over, until he could relax enough to stand back up. Sweating, panting, wiping the tears from his eyes as he stared yet again at the poor man he'd been violating in death.

Something was wrong with him. Something sick. Jaskier knew that as he shook, resting his forehead against the man's cold thigh to stave off the last wave of nausea. But even knowing that didn't make him leave.

If there was a hell, he'd surely rot in it. He turned until his cheek was pressed against that cool thigh, blinking the blur out of his vision and staring up at that cock once more, his own twitching with interest despite it all.

No one else would know. Sure, he wouldn't be able to live with himself afterward, but he already couldn't - that's what the wine was for. Hiding all the things about himself he couldn't stand or didn't want to think about. What was one more on top of it all?

Jaskier hated himself for every second of it, and reveled in how it felt. Finding the man easy to fill, to fuck into, even if moving him about wasn't easy. It would have been easy to pretend the man was drunk, passed out, but any time Jaskier tried his mind would snap him back to the present. The man beneath him was cold, dead, and felt so fucking good around his cock.

The noises echoing in that small room were obscene. His own breaths, the wet slap of flesh, little moans that he couldn't bite back. Everything was his and he hated and loved it, nausea building along with that tight coil in his gut. He couldn't help but reach between him and the body, finding that soft cock again, wrapping his fingers around it and jerking it off like it would do anything but spur his own sick pleasure on.

Selfish. Selfish and greedy, things he'd been called so many times in his life but this was the first him he'd seen it. His own flaws raw and open for even his eyes as he bit back a whine, as his balls clenched tight, as he used the body beneath him. Jaskier was sick and he couldn't stop, gasping, hips stuttering and his grip on the man's hips slipping from the sweat on his hands.

"Jaskier."

He came with a cry of horror, slipping out of the body and jerking back, eyes wide. Pleasure shuddered through him even as he saw her - standing in the doorway, her hand on the handle, eyes cold and expression unreadable as she stared at the scene before her.

Ciri. Her dagger at her hip, sword strapped to her back, blood on her cheek. She'd been hunting tonight - and she'd found her monster.

There was nothing Jaskier could say to defend himself, and the bile burned its way up his throat at last. He was ruined, and he'd done it to himself.

#the witcher #jaskier #dd:ddne #dove writes

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homaholimob · 2 years

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weil-weil-lautre · 3 years

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In existing bourgeois society men are dominated by the economic conditions created by themselves, by the means of production which they themselves have produced, as if by an alien force. The actual basis of the religious reflective activity therefore continues to exist, and with it the religious reflection itself. An although bourgeois political economy has given a certain insight into the casual connection of this alien domination, this makes no essential difference. Bourgeois economics can neither prevent crises in general, nor protect the individual capitalists from losses, bad debts and bankruptcy, nor secure the individual workers against unemployment and destitution.

Friedrich Engels, Anti-Dühring, from MECW vol. 25, 301

#friedrich engels #engels #diss #quote #socialism

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elizabethanism · 2 years

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You would be wrong if you thought that I love books. I am a machine condemned to devour them in order to vomit them up in a new form, like manure on the soil of history.

— Marx in a letter to his daughter Laura, 1868

It's the letter from Marx to Laura and her husband Paul Lafargue on the 11th of April, 1868, MECW, vol. 43, p. 9-10. The translation is slightly less vigorous and a little longer than the version quoted here:

"You'll certainly fancy, my dear child, that I am very fond of books, because I trouble you with them at so unseasonable a time. But you would be quite mistaken. I am a machine, condemned to devour them and, then, throw them, in a changed form, on the dunghill of history."

#Marx #Books #devour #Karl marx #Reading #philosophy #Letters

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marcogiovenale · 2 years

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mecw (karl marx frederick engels collected works brickbats) / claire fontaine. 2016

da https://operavivamagazine.org/ _

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#art #arte #Claire Fontaine #Engels #Marx #OperaViva

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perkwunos · 4 years

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In any case, Marx did not aspire to “Marxism.” But not only that; when the German economist Adolph Wagner was the first to deal with Marx’s theory in his textbook and wrote of Marx’s “socialist system,” the latter, outraged, noted in his marginalia that he had “never established a socialist system.” (MECW 24, p. 533) “Systems” and worldview “isms” were never his thing. One looks in vain for statements in which he stylizes himself as the founding father of an “ism.” Besides seeing himself as a man of the “party” (by which he meant not a specific organization, but rather the totality of forces struggling against capitalism and for social emancipation), Marx saw himself as a man of science. Capital, which he regarded as “the most terrible missile that has yet been hurled at the heads of the bourgeoisie (landowners included)” (MECW 42, p. 358), he counted among the “scientific attempts to revolutionize science.” (MECW 41, p. 436) The emphasis on “scientific” is Marx’s. And, when Marx wrote in the foreword to the first volume of Capital, “every opinion based on scientific criticism I welcome” (MECW 35, p. 11), that was not simply rhetoric. Marx was fully aware of the provisional nature and fallibility of scientific assertions. “De omnibus dubitandum” – “everything is to be doubted” – he wrote as an answer to the question as to his life’s motto in a fashionable questionnaire that his daughter had presented to him. The enormous mass of manuscripts that he left unpublished, and the to some extent considerable revisions of already published texts bear witness to the fact that he did not exempt his own work from such doubt. In the history of Marxism, this work was often dealt with in a different manner.

...

Marx himself, in any case, did not seek final certainties. He was far more interested in the critical business of undermining certainties in order to open up new spaces for thought and action – in which it’s not immediately clear what the correct result will be.

In contrast to the “Marxism” that Marx rejected, with its identity-defining certainties, this critical, unfinished Marx has an extremely stimulating and subversive effect. Which of his analyses and concepts are useful, what can help to change the world, and what can’t, is not fixed for all time. One will always have to constantly discuss and make new judgements: “De omnibus dubitandum.”

Michael Heinrich, “Je ne suis pas marxiste”

#michael heinrich #karl marx

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textlab · 3 years

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늙은 마르크스의 고투, 『마르크스의 마지막 투쟁』

- 1881~1883년의 지적 여정

마르셀로 무스토

강성훈, 문혜림 옮김

산지니, 2018

- 『자본』 1권이 완성된 후, 새로운 이론적 성취들을 고민하고 발전시키기 위해 고민했던 마르크스 말년의 연구 작업과 그 과정에 겪어야 했던 병마, 그리고 개인사적인 고통 등을 통해, 한 인물이 얼마나 헌신적이고 엄정하게 대의를 위한 학문에 헌신했는가를 정리한 마르크스 연구자 마르셀로 무스토의 마르크스 전기. 사이토 코헤이가 다루었던 마르크스의 환경론적 전회에 대한 글들을 보고 다시 꺼내 든 책. 그런데 꺼내고 보니 예전에 보다가 화나서 때려 쳤던 것은 확실하지만 그 이유는 가물가물해서 읽다 보니까 되살아난다.

- 책은 다른 무스토의 책보다는 훨씬 이론적으로는 가볍게, 그러나 마르크스의 말년의 모습에 대해서는 더 생생하게 그려내고 있다. 그리고 ‘러시아 문제’를 둘러싼 마르크스의 이론적 전회의 모습을 보여줌으로써, 역사를 단선적이고, 법칙적으로 이해하려는 자칭 마르크스주의자에 대해 마르크스가 얼마나 경멸적인 태도를 취했는지, 그리고 강단의 이론가/평론가들의 올바름보다 헌신적인 혁명가들의 모습에 마르크스가 보여준 찬사를 그려낸다. 그리고 이 책은 무엇보다 마르크스가 아내와 딸들 그리고 손주에 보냈던 애정을 인간적으로 그려내며, 그러기에 말년 겪어야 했던 연 이은 비극 아내, 딸의 죽음에 무너져가는 모습에 대해서 보여준다. 그런 의미에서 인간 마르크스와 『자본』 이후의 마르크스를 이해하기 위한 짧은 입문서로는 꽤나 괜찮은 책이다. 특히 많은 마르크스 전기들이 놓친 마르크스의 학문 방식과 그의 탁월하고 예리한 감각을 보여준다는 점에서는 매력적이다.

- 그런데 왜 때려 치웠는가 하면 무스토의 문제는 아니고 전적으로 번역자들의 문제다. 특히 이 책의 경우 마르크스가 보여준 이론적 변화를, 완성된 책이 아니라 마르크스가 남긴 다양한 초고들, 요약 정리, 편지 등을 통해 확인해야 하기 때문에 섬세한 번역이 필요하다. 하지만 내용이 이상한 곳이 한 두 군데가 아니라서, 영문판(2020년에 출판되었으니 당시는 나오지 않았다)이 나오면 봐야겠다고 생각했던 것이다. 예를 들어 이런 식이다. 번역으로는 “영국은 인도에서 이중의 과제를 달성해야 한다. 하나는 파괴이며, 다른 하나는 소멸한 낡은 아시아적 사회를 재생시켜 아시아에 서유럽 사회의 물적 기초를 마련하는 것”이란 번역했는데 당시 인도 문제에 대한 마르크스의 입장을 아는 이들이라면 너무나 당황스러운 이야기다. 그래서 이번에는 다시 읽으면서 아예 MECW(소련에서 작업된 마르크스-엥겔스 저작선집)를 비교하면서 봤는데, 이 내용의 원문은 이렇다. “영국은 인도에서 이중의 과제를 달성해야 한다. 하나는 파괴이며 다른 하나는 재생이다. 낡은 아시아적 사회의 폐지와 아시아에서 서유럽 사회의 물적 기초의 전개” 러시아의 농촌 공동체 문제에 대해서는 번역에서는 “러시아에서는 역으로 공동 소유가 사적 소유로 변화되어야 할 것이다”라고 마르크스가 주장한 것처럼 쓰여 있지만, MECW에서는 “반대로 러시아 농민에게는 공동 소유가 사적 소유로 변화했을 수 있지만 그렇지 않았다”라며 마르크스 자신의 주장이 서유럽에 제한된 역사적 사건을 정식화 했으며, 그것은 구체적 정황의 역사적 사건이기에 러시아와는 다르다는 점을 강조한다. 무스토의 영어판을 보지 않았지만, 같은 MECW를 인용했으므로 무스토의 오류라기 보다는 번역자들의 오류로 보인다. 책을 번역하기도 하고, 그래서 다른 언어를 우리 말로 옮기는 것이 얼마나 힘든 일인지 충분히 공감하지만, 그래도 이런 수준의 오역은 마르크스의 기본적인 주장 등에 대해 알고 있다면 범하지 않을 것들 아닌가 싶다. 게다가 하필이면 미묘한 변화를 포착하는 것에 의의가 있는 책을 이렇게 번역해버리면 책의 가치를 완전히 상실하게 되지 않을까?

#review

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rotenotes · 4 months

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Marx on surplus value (Οικονομικά Χειρόγραφα του 1857-58 [MECW, vol. 28, pp. 248-51])

Για την κατανόηση του καπιταλισμού απο τον Μαρξ σου στέλνω ένα απόσπασμα (στα αγγλικά και ελληνικά)^* από τα Οικονομικά Χειρόγραφα του 1857-58 (πρώτη εκδοχή του Κεφαλαίου) του Μαρξ που βρίσκεται στο MECW, vol. 28. Στο απόσπασμα αυτό ο Μαρξ παρουσιάζει την υπεραξία. Γύρω απο την υπεραξία–δηλαδή τον ορισμό της και την καταγωγή της–μπορούν να εκτεθούν οι διάφορες οικονομικές θεωρίες^** για τον…

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#capitalism #equivalent #forced labour #Karl Marx #labour capacity #labourer #objectified labour #origin #surplus labour #surplus value #unequal exchange #value of labour #vitality #worker

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edwad · 3 years

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*Owns MECW and bookshelf is filled with the most niche shit on Marx and half his personality is based on Marx* "I'm not a Marxist." Yeah ok.

yeah what isn't clicking

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worklabournewsresearch · 4 years

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Marx and Engels and a Question of Intellectual Property

“Administrators of the Marxists Internet Archive (MIA) removed the texts based on Marx and Engels’ Collected Works (MECW) from their website on May 1, 2014. The works were taken down in compliance with a directive from the publisher Lawrence and Wishart (L&W) that claims ownership of the 50 volume collection. L&W’s directive sought to retract these works - works by, arguably, two of the most important radical intellectuals that have been deceased for more than a century - from free public access. This incident exposes continuing conflicts at the intersection of intellectual property, labor and digital technologies. More specifically, it demonstrates how legal and ideological discourses of ownership and authorship are mobilized to benefit capital at the expense of public knowledge and even authors themselves.”

“ L&W’s claim over these works stem from MECW’s status as a derivative work. An analysis of the history of these works reveals that they are the product of many types of labor including the work done by Marx and Engels, academics, students, translators, publishers and online volunteers. This paper asks: how have economic and political interests shaped discourses of authorship and intellectual property that allow L&W to assert ownership over some of Marx and Engels’ works? In what ways do new production practices and technological changes serve to challenge L&W’s claim? And, what alternatives to the current intellectual property regime can address the needs of knowledge producers and the public?”

Neilson, T. (2019). Marxists internet archive takedown. Fast Capitalism, 12(1). (8 pages, PDF)

Marxist Internet Archive

Marxism / Socialism / Communism Index of the

KWSnet : Annotated Subject Directory for the Web: Marxism / Socialism / Communism Index

KWSnet: Annotated Subject Directory for the Web

#Marxist Internet Archive #intellectual property #Marx #Engels #KWSnet #subject directory #socialism #communism #Marxism

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frankchessar · 4 years

Photo

Wrestlers Real Names

Frankie The Ace Valentine Is,

“The Ace Frankie Valentine”

Listed As:

“The Ace Frankie Valentine”

Ref : In Barry Gilberts Wrestlers Real Names.

https://bgwrn.weebly.com/names-c.html

Wrestlers:

Camron Elijah Chennault = Independents Camron Ozzy Zulu Cherry = Florida NXT WWE Developmental Malik Omari Frank Chessar = Independents The Ace Frankie Valentine Chris Chetti = CWA Masa Chono ECW MECW The Erotic Experience Georgeous Chris Van De Lay GQ Quartermaine Jack Chetti = Northeast New England ECW ICW IWCCW The Tasmaniacs The Brotherhood Mako Tasmaniac Tasmaniac #2

#FrankChessar Frankie The Ace Valentine The Ace Frankie Valentine Frankie Ace Valentine

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canmom · 5 years

Text

while I’m quoting Jasper Bernes on stuff, and given the recent... let’s just say “debates” about what role certain technologies might have in whatever communist future we’re hoping to somehow build, I really like this one:

But perhaps “repurposing” means for Toscano instead a kind of making-do with the machinery of logistics as we find it, seeing what other purposes it can be put to, rather than imagining an appropriation of its commanding heights? Any revolutionary process will make do with what it finds available as a matter of necessity, but it is precisely the “convertibility” or “reconfigurability” of these technologies that seems questionable. The fixed capital of the contemporary production regime is designed for extraction of maximum surplus value; each component part is engineered for insertion into this global system; therefore, the presence of communist potentials as unintended features —“affordances”, as they are sometimes called — of contemporary technology needs to be argued for, not assumed as a matter of course.[25]

[25] Marxist theories of technology often diverge along two paths, each of which can be traced to the works of Marx. The dominant view holds that capitalist technologies are fundamentally progressive, first because they reduce necessary labour time and thereby potentially free humans from the necessity of labouring, and second because industrialisation effects a fundamental ‘socialisation’ of production, obliterating the hierarchies that once pertained to particular crafts (e.g. e.g. Marx, Grundrisse [MECW 29], 90-92 [Nicolaus trans.]). In this Orthodox account, communism is latent within the socialised, cooperative arrangement of the factory, whose technical substrate increasingly enters into crisis-producing contradiction with the inefficient and unplanned nature of the capitalist marketplace.

But there is also a heterodox Marxist perspective on technology, whose exemplars are writers such as Raniero Panzieri and David Noble, and whose clearest sources lie in the chapter in Capital on ‘Machinery and Large-Scale Industry,’ and in particular, the section on the factory. There, Marx suggests that, in the modern factory system, capital’s domination of labour ‘acquires a technical and palpable reality’. In the factory ‘the gigantic natural forces, and the mass of social labour embodied in the system of machinery…constitutes the power of the master’ (Marx, Capital vol.1 [MECW 35], 420-430 [Fowkes trans.]). But if machinery is a materialisation of capitalist domination – an objectification of the ‘master’ – then we have every reason to doubt that we can undo such domination without negating the ‘technical and palpable aspect of machinery. If workers were to seize production machinery and self-manage the factories, this might only amount to another mode of administering the domination sedimented inside the production machinery.

The heterodox perspective is obviously in line with the conclusions of this article, but much work remains to be done in developing an adequate theory of technology. We cannot merely invert the Orthodox, progressivist account of machinery which assumes that every advance of the productive forces constitutes an enlargement of the possibilities for communism and declare, in opposition, that all technology is politically negative or inherently capitalist. Rather, we have to examine technologies from a technical perspective, from the communist prospect, and consider what affordances they really do allow, given the tragic circumstances of their birth.

Logistics, Counterlogistics, and the Communist Project - Jasper Bernes in Endnotes 3

You could argue that he’s not saying very much in this quote - sure, some technology will be good, some won’t - but I feel like the framing of asking about the ‘affordances, given the tragic circumstances of their birth’ is quite useful...

#paragraphs added to the footnote for readability lol #endnotes looks so readable on their website and you copy it into a 540px column and it's like whoah there

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