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cuubism · 1 year

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A little headcannon that has been stewing in my head for a while and has absolutely no proof from the cannon

Death has wings right? What if Dream used to have wings too but when his kingdom got invaded for the first time(that story he tells in the Overture) the invaders cut his wings off. That's the part of the reason why he crafted his helm and why's he so dependent on it. They took his wings so he took their skull and a spine, an eye for an eye kind of situation. Also, that's when Dream first started employing a raven. He still has scars on his shoulder blades that follow him to any form he takes. He's ashamed of them, sees them as a sign of weakness, a reminder of his failure and his flaws and goes to great lengths to cover them up. That's about it, but I'd love to hear what you think of it^-^

(Plus: Hob gently running his hands over the scars, showing Dream his own ones and reassuring him that there's nothing broken, or wrong with him)

NO BUT THIS IS SO ANGSTY I LOVE IT. i love suffering

i feel like a permanent injury like that would have to be done to dream's core essence, such as it is, rather than his 'physical form' - i don't know if dream's physical form in the waking world or other realms can even be hurt like that. it would have to be like, something that deeply wounds the dreaming, or the concept of dreaming, or just like the deepest core of dream as an 'entity' rather than it being a physical wound. (this is leading me on a mental tangent about injuries to large groups of dreamers also injuring dream, like, extinction events and such, but that's for another time).

you managed to rope me into it, congrats XD

content warning for blood, gore, violence, Things Done That Can't Be Undone, etc.

There is not much, in his long life and memory, that Dream is able to forget. Thoughts do not drift into irrelevancy, into the past, the way they do for humans. He is able to hold much, all at once, in the cavern of his mind, eons of all that has happened hovering close enough to touch. It is a heavy weight more often than it is an aid.

But he forgets, sometimes, with Hob.

With Hob, the rare points of their contact stand out as singularly bright stars in the nebula of Dream's existence. All else within him fades. When Hob takes his hand Dream feels clear as a desert sky, when Hob kisses him for the first time, Dream is floating free in a great salt lake, hanging weightless.

He forgets.

It's only after, bodies pressed together with pleasing heat and sweat-tackiness, Hob tracing patterns over his back, that Dream begins to remember again.

"Dream..." Hob's fingers stutter over his shoulder blades. His voice catches with the hesitance he has often displayed with Dream since their reunion. I think you're here for friendship. Dream feels the echoes.

He kisses Hob's throat, tastes the salt tang of his skin, hides his face away there. The weight of embodiment returning. "Ask your question," he says. "I swear not to part from you now."

"Is this from...?" Hob's fingertips dance up the raised arcs of scar tissue over his back. Pain sparkles in the wake of his touch like the sharpness of a hand-drawn tattoo in the permanence of its inking. As humans imagine it. Dream is not truly physical and could not bear such a mark. Except for this.

"No," he tells Hob. Blame for many of Dream's recent ordeals can be laid at Roderick Burgess's feet, but not this one. "Much older than that."

"Oh." Hob keeps tracing the scar over Dream's right shoulder blade. The touch aches deep in Dream's being where those wounds originate, but he does not tell Hob to stop. Even like this, Hob's hands bring him back, and back, and keep him here.

Hob is waiting, leaving an opening for him to elaborate. Dream is not yet sure whether he wishes to.

"It is not a pretty story," he says.

Hob strokes through his hair. Dream keeps his head tucked under his chin and so feels each word as it's spoken. "Neither of us is a pretty story, darling. Tell it if you want to."

Dream has not spoken of this in many years. There are those in the Dreaming who have served him for millennia whom he has not told. He has taken lovers, had them see the scars during their lovemaking, and still not relayed the story.

"When I was young," he begins, "and still coming into my power, the Dreaming was invaded. My borders were not as strong, then. My realm, less populated. Ancient beings, older than I was at the time, hungered for my realm. Sought its power for their own."

"Older than dreams?" Hob asks.

"In their universe, there were no dreams," Dream tells him. "Perhaps it is what drew them to me."

"Alright. Wow." Hob sounds thoughtful. He rubs Dream's back, between his shoulder blades where it doesn't hurt. "Go on, love."

"I fought them. But the collective unconscious of this universe was young and undeveloped, as was I; I had not mastered all elements of my domain. I fought, but inelegantly, and struggled to counter dreamless beings when all my power was in the unconscious. They were wholly anchored in the present; I, in the space between seconds; we were poorly suited as combatants."

"What did you do?" Hob asks, quiet. He can sense, Dream thinks, the direction this is going, that Dream would not be so hesitant to tell the story of scars born of victory.

"I did not know," Dream admits, equally quiet, still shamed by it, his own failure, and its branching repercussions, "what to do. And the Eldest God, he who had first rent open the walls of my realm, pounced on my uncertainty, captured me, held me--"

The memory, never forgotten, always just within reach should he turn towards it, rises again -- the silk-smooth black sand on the shores of the Dreaming, crushed into his cheek; the warm waters lapping at his mouth, nose, eyes, drowning him; the impossible weight on his spine of the impossible dreamless creature holding him down, arms wrenched behind his back, the feral animal growl that had escaped him, the equally animal panic beating under his ribcage, the fragile spun dreamstuff of him held in the sharptoothed maw of cold reality, his wings--

"Dream?"

Dream comes back to himself. Comes back to Hob. The overwarm flannel sheets. The soft press of Hob's body. He's tapping something on Hob's arm, and hadn't realized he was doing it. It's the rhythm of an old song from before the time of men, the electrical beats passed along root chains from tree to tree to tree, all the way across the great forests that now exist only in scarce patches on the earth.

Dream shifts ever closer to Hob's body, slips a knee between Hob's thighs to tangle them, bare skin to bare skin, limb to limb, root to root.

"I had wings, then," he says.

--his wings, flapping frantically in the face of the thing that pinned him, feathers catching and tearing on jagged armor, held to the ground the way a creature of flight was never meant to be--

"Oh," breathes Hob. He touches the long scar over Dream's shoulder blade again and pauses there. The pain catches the story to Dream again like a hook and holds it there as he continues bleeding it dry.

"The Eldest God dug his claws into me and tore the wings from my body." Dream's voice doesn't shake but he does not manage more than a whisper. "I am not a physical creature, Hob, understand this, I cannot be so easily harmed, it was not a physical form that was damaged, rather, the Old Gods came from stone and earth and it was stone they harnessed as their claws, ancient stone to carve into my being and tear out my wings from the essence of me, root and stem, flesh and bone, air and feather and starlight."

All of this comes out in a continuous rush, and Hob kisses the side of his head, says, "Breathe."

He can still feel, if he but thinks back, the tearing of the claws. A cold so bright it felt like burning. His face ground into the sand to muffle his scream, the howling whiteout of pain overtaking all other noise, the crack of his shoulder joint as it was broken. Star stuff spilling out over the sand - Dream hadn't even known he could bleed until then. Hands that should never have touched in the first place releasing him. Collapsing, disarmed, to the ground. Every limb on fire, the ones that were left.

"Dream."

He lost himself, and found himself again some time later curled in the shallows of the Dreaming sea, seeking shelter from the cold in the warm waters. Face half submerged, breathing as much salt water as air. Blood still spooling around him like leftover paint whirling in a water glass.

"Dream."

Even in those warm waters, he was shivering. Dream doesn't think he's ever been quite warm since; that cold latched itself in him somewhere and never left.

Hob's voice, now, against his ear. He's curled himself around Dream while Dream wasn't paying attention, Dream's back to the warm protection of Hob's chest. "You don't have to finish if you don't want to."

Dream will not leave a story unfinished, not even one such as this. "When I had regained my strength enough to fight back," he continues, "I was... not in control. I knew only survival. If the Old Gods had wished me to understand their world, they succeeded. I abandoned my powers and fought with my hands and my claws and my teeth, and I tore the Eldest God's skull and spine from his body. Both of us would be maimed, I thought; if he would have my dreams then I would have for my own the backbone upon which he held his earth. I listened to him scream. I watched each rib pry up from his chest and snap, my hands slick with his blood, his with mine, and felt nothing but the raw satiation of a wolf setting upon meat. I have told you, Hob." He takes his first breath in a while and feels it rattle, hollow, around his ribcage. "It is not a pretty story."

"No." Hob's hand finds Dream's against his middle, tangles their fingers, holds him. His breath is shaky in Dream's hair, words more so. "No, darling, it's not. I'm sorry."

They rewrote the story of the Dreaming, Dream recalls saying to Destiny, after. Before he had come to know, truly, what Destiny was. Kneeling in his garden, blood still draping his raw back like a shroud, Dream had sought meaning, answers, reason. Foolish, in retrospect, to even consider asking for succor.

Destiny had said that the Dreaming had seeped too far into the Waking world. That what had happened was a necessary rebalancing.

Had Dream not been forbidden from physical violence against his siblings, he would have bitten off one of Destiny's hands with his own sharp teeth and asked if he felt more balanced then.

"Now you know what vicious creature you lie with, Hob Gadling," Dream says. The words are heavy in his throat, but he can't find it in himself to slip from Hob's hold. Now you know the jagged turn at the beginning of my story.

He wonders, sometimes, what the Dreaming might have been like had it continued on the other branch of Destiny's forking path. What he might have been like. There is so much space between a winged creature and a once-winged creature. The entire sky.

"I know." Hob bites at the back of Dream's neck, light but sharp, then kisses that same spot. The nip of pain is unexpectedly soothing. Hob too knows what it is to bite and claw and writhe and maul. “I know. I’ve known your darkness, honey. Don’t you worry.”

“They fled me,” Dream tells him. “The Old Gods. After. I did not understand why at the time.” He had stood, bloodied, shaking, over their Eldest one, bones grasped in his hands, and watched them disappear. These beings that could still have shredded the Dreaming and swallowed it, but chose to run. “Now, I imagine it is like the way men will flee from an animal that is so much smaller than them but has gone rabid. The wrongness. The danger of irreparable madness. They saw me ruined and wished not to catch it, saw the Dreaming—”

This wound has dulled over time and become but a throbbing ache at the base of his skull, a reminder of something missing. But it never disappears.

“The Dreaming, changed, from what they had wanted.”

Dream’s back has never been quite right, since. His anatomy is meant for two sets of joints, not one. But it is only a fitting marker of the permanent damage done that day.

“Changed?” says Hob, so gentle now, lips brushing his skin.

“There was once more,” Dream says. “The collective unconscious was once more… collective.”

“Wait. D’you mean…?”

“Yes. There was more interconnection between minds when I was young. There were not human minds in the sense that you would know them, not yet. But there was communication, and knowing, back then.”

Vestiges of it still linger. In the vast underground networks of the trees, the paired spins of distant atoms. The matched steps of lovers finding perfect synchronicity in a dance. But—

“That was sundered with my wings.”

The cold that had washed over Dream when that realization hit had been worse than the pain of losing the wings in the first place. How he had failed the dreamers under his care. Let things fracture and tear and separate when they were meant to be together.

Hob sighs against the back of his neck. “I’m so sorry, Dream.”

“I am sorry,” Dream says. “It should never have happened.”

“No, it shouldn’t,” Hob agrees, and it’s sweet pain sliding between Dream’s ribs, for Hob to press his fingertips to the rawness of him and say, yes, failure, failure, I see it now.

But Hob kisses the point of his shoulder, the ever-tense muscles of his upper back, the hard curve of his scapula and the calcified line of another almost-joint, lost to time. His lips find the uneven scar tissue and press there, which is its own sweet pain, but sliding towards sweet, a sharp bite to kissed lips.

“It shouldn’t,” Hob whispers, and the words vibrate to the core of him. Hob does not see his failure, will not; Dream had forgotten Hob’s charity towards him, how he will see the blood on Dream’s hands and wipe it away instead of asking how it got there. Dream’s failures have stolen something from him he does not even know to miss, and still.

Now Dream does wish for Hob’s hands slipping under his ribs. Hob would find the aching wretched thing within him that had been loosed that day and hold it in his palms, wash the blood from it with careful strokes. Would that Hob could have held him then, submerged him deep in the waters of the Dreaming sea until the dark and the warmth and the strong hold of his arms had soothed the flayed and violated creature that Dream had become back to sanity. Before the gnashing rageful part of him had turned predator and fully grown its claws.

Perhaps there is succor to be found, after all. How quickly Hob Gadling has become it.

“I wish that I could have…” Hob sighs. It sounds mournful, longing. “I don’t even know. Helped you. Held you. Futile, I know.”

“I would not have you feel badly. It is long past and cannot be undone,” Dream says, as if Hob’s words don’t mean more to him than he could possibly know.

“Nothing can, sweetheart,” Hob says. His hair brushes Dream’s shoulders. It is terribly soft now, in this day and age. Dream suspects it was not always so. Human lives have rarely been soft on their bodies. He appreciates the softness of Hob’s body now, and how it cradles him. Dream himself has long been unchangeably hard-edged. “But I would still help you.”

“Sweetheart,” Dream repeats. Dream might have been sweet, once, at the end of a different story. “You would call me this, at the end of this tale?”

Hob turns him so they are facing each other once more. A tear has gathered in the corner of his eye, and slips down to wet his pillowcase as Dream watches. Tears for Dream. Warm salt water. He smiles at Dream anyway.

“You’re my sweetheart. My dear one. You think I would think anything about this other than sadness for you?”

“Dear one,” Dream echoes. “Always good to me, my Hob.”

“‘Course.” Hob squeezes his hand. Hands that too have known violence, but soft for Dream, always. “Is there anything I can do for you? Anything at all?”

“Only what you have already done,” Dream says. “Be a cavern where I can shelter from the cold.”

Hob kisses him, hot and lingering, and pulls the blankets up over their heads.

#thanks for sending this anon i'm extremely obsessed with it now #thinking about young dream still new to the world building the dreaming for the first time and learning his powers and still full #of softness and wonder and getting ripped to shreds for it #and now i am Screaming #dream of the endless #hob gadling #dreamling #my writing #ask #anonymous #tw gore #tw blood #fuck i did this while i'm supposed to be working so i should really get back to that now. adios

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bizarrelittlemew · 7 months

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genuinely thank you so so much for the beautiful gifset of Lucius and Pete <3

i love them so so so so so much and being able to stare at them staring lovingly at each other is such a gift

"I love it, I love all of it" 😭😭😭

literally they're the cutest sweetest most precious how dare they 😭

#asks #neon-slime #this gif is for you <3 #ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #our flag means death #ofmd gifs #ida.stuff #lupete #lucius spriggs #black pete #also no need to thank me i LOVED making that gifset they mean the world to me #can't wait to see more of lucius in his brooding era and i'm obsessed with the jeans he wears in the preview akdjfjdsk

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somegrumpynerd · 19 days

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Poor angsty lil oreo 😟 maybe he could need a reboop of his installment... or preferably a nice comforting hug from New Rat friend?? UwU seriously, would be sooo cute omg! 2 cuties hugging it out is just soo awww~ pls?? ✨🥺🙏

- 🍓

Well, the rat is me (hello!), so I guess I could give Cross a hug if he needs!

But he should be warned, I am a bear hugger >:3c

And while I'm here hugging skeletons, if I could be serious for just a second (because any longer and I'll die of sillyness deficiency)

This is the anniversary of a really sad day for me, and if I hadn't had undertale to be obsessed with and distract myself I can't imagine how much worse it would have been. So I just wanted to say thank you for letting me jump into the fandom and make stuff and have fun, it really means a lot <3

#Ask #Anon #UTDR #UTMV #I won't get into the sad thing don't worry - no bummers here!#But for realsies thank you guys for being really sweet and nice and making such amazing things #Getting absolutely obsessed with all these skeletons has been the best thing I did in the last year #and I'm super glad I got to know all you and see your amazing art and be friends <3 #Anyway serious time over - I am hugging every skeleton until they make a squeaky toy noise #Who do you think makes the best squeak when you squeeze them?#I could see it being Blue or maybe Horror

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canisalbus · 5 months

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why must Finns always tell people to try salmiakki? you guys sadistic or something?? visited over there some years ago and was given that stuff without explanation or warning and was told "just try it". and then the person laughed at my pain 😭 (and now I sometimes sadistically tell people to try it eheheh)

lmao love your blog tho, your art is very shaped and your dog men are very anguished and it speaks to me as a gay man from a very religious area (not religious myself, tho). also love reading your responses to asks, interesting stuff in there. anyway keep doing what you do! unless it's feeding salmiakki to unsuspecting foreigners, pls don't do that lmaooo

I guess it's just very funny to watch how people react to it! Salmiakki is extremely popular here and comes in many forms (my current toothpaste is salmiakki flavored, so are my d-vitamin supplements), yet it's absolutely inedible to many people who aren't used to it. They aren't offering it to people out of malice and I think in most cases you get a little warning beforehand, that it's a weird local food that might taste strong and unpleasant. I've known people who have moved here and gradually developed a liking for it. It goes well with milk chocolate and that mix might be a more palatable option if plain salmiakki doesn't appeal to you.

#thank you! I'm glad you like my art and anguished dogs and my aimless asks!#answered #anonymous #it kind of tastes like if salt was angry at you #in candy form it's mixed with sugar so it's also subtly sweet #tends to make you salivate a lot #in high school I developed an obsession for turkinpippuri which is a classic hard candy salmiakki #and I ate them so often they burned this open sore on the roof of my mouth

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psymachine · 30 days

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Your art is sooo good. 😵‍💫

To be contrarian, TOP fat Mac, maybe feeding Dennis and massaging him?

sorry to make this a little bit dumb but it was too good

uncensored version

#macdennis #macdennis art #fed fucked and massaged is exactly how dennis expects to be treated #i'm obsessed thank you so much for putting this ask in my inbox #honestly idk if this is totally finished but i need to post it so my brain will be released from its spell #and allow me to go eat dinner at fucking 9PM lmaooo #colors are weird i think but overall my favorite child right now #machinegoods #machinequarantine #also thank you for the compliment!!

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noir-renard · 1 year

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So I haven't really had time to do art for fun in a while and I want to do more fan art and also finish this someday, but I've left little projects like this to rot before. I didn't want this to end up abandoned without you ever seeing the fan art I made for your fic, so here's a sketch from chapter one! It's very rough 😅

👀👀👀 oh my!!! this is gorgeous!! I am having so many thoughts and none of them are very coherent but a;lkjda;lkja;l I LOVE THIS!!! thank you so much for sharing it with me 😭❤️😭❤️😭 this is gorgeous, even if you don't add any more details to it, I'm just,,,,,stunned. floored. in awe. It's so soft and tender and just?? I love.

THANK YOU!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#answered asks #batburger au #iygabab #darkeneddawning #I am obsessed with this I wish I could express it better but I'm just overwhelmed with emotion (pos)#thank you so so much!!#iygabab fan art

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bakughostly · 6 months

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SPARE VAMPIRE BKG THOUGHTS ??? SPARE VAMPIRE BKG THOUGHTS SIR MAAM ??

omg i have been traveling so it took me forever to respond to this because i wanted to be able to type out my Thoughts on the computer but WILLOW omg..... u spoil me by asking this. because i have so many and they constantly live in my brain ldfskjfslkdjf

i think what i love about bkg so much as a character is that he has desires but most of those desires take the form of achieving a goal. he has so many things he wants to be the best at and so many heights he wants to reach and yeah, part of this is because he's an ambitious person but part of it is because of his ego and his insecurity and the expectations placed upon him by the people around him/society at large. and i think bkg in any context has these things that he wants to achieve because his desire to reach his lofty goals is integral to his character.

and vampire bkg... think of all that time. what do you do when you've achieved everything you've ever wanted to achieve? what's left after that? for a century he has been achieving his goals, and now he has everything. money and power and even respect from locals in the villages near his castle (though that respect is tinged heavily with fear, because even if they don't know exactly what the handsome bachelor that lives inside the creepy but beautiful castle on the horizon is, they know he's something other... and not to mention he looks exactly like his father, and exactly like his father's father, and isn't it strange that none of us have ever seen their wives, have never seen these men at any point in their lives outside of their late twenties/early thirties?)

i don't think stagnation sits well with bkg. i don't think he's ever learned how to be still. despite having unlimited time, he had to accomplish everything as quick as possible, because he just wanted it all. he wanted to be the best so bad that it sung in his veins like adrenaline. and now, in the aftermath, he feels that same emptiness. adrenaline come and gone and only a hollow tiredness in its wake. now is when you feel the pain--nothing distracts you from it.

and one day... you, cat-curious, find your way to his castle. (this has gotten long lmao so im gonna put a read more)

maybe you're a traveler, or an adventurer, or simply someone in one of the nearby villages that doesn't believe the rumors. but no matter who you are and where you come from, you've heard the stories of his Otherness. though you don't know it yet, just like him, you thrive best with adrenaline thrumming through your veins--you thrive when you have something to want. and you want to know the secrets behind the Otherness that everyone else is so afraid of.

does that mean you're not afraid? god, no. of course you are. but you've reached his castle under an auspicious moon and you're sure this is a good omen.

here is why desire is such a dangerous thing: it is often insatiable. for a long, long time, bkg has survived from the blood of his livestock which he cares for, from game on his land. deer in spring, grouse in winter. to live like that for so long, and then to have something so much more tempting come directly to him, delivered to his doorstep--it's almost like a gift.

at the same time, i don't think bkg relishes the idea of drinking human blood, and certainly not killing a human. i think he could be a bloodthirsty vampire, but specifically when it comes to vengeance. he could hurt someone that wronged him, but not someone whose only crime is their curiosity.

you offer to work for him. to clean his castle, to tend his grounds, to care for his cattle. you know how to cook and how to bake (though you're unaware that this means little to him), and you have more fortitude than your appearance belies--his long-fallow farmland would thrive under your hands if he gave you the opportunity to work with it.

if it was years ago and he was still the same man, he might have said no. but it's hard to care when you feel empty. fine, he says. but don't expect fancy lodging or riches beyond measure.

you work, you investigate, you sleep. it's a cycle. and bkg watches you the whole time, though you're none the wiser. he's smart. he knows what you're doing. but you've broken up the monotony for him.

there's no food in his pantries, and you have to find him to ask for coin to go into town and buy groceries. he doesn't provide you the coin directly--a smart move, perhaps--but later that day, what you've requested has been stocked in the pantry shelves. and that's how you mainly interact with him for a while--weeks, maybe. you wake at dawn and clear the land and feed the cows and pigs and begin the monstrous task of cleaning a castle that has been left to rot and you go to the room you've chosen when the sun is long set, settle into your moth-eaten bed, and sleep harder than you've ever done in your life. if you need tools, feed for the cattle, groceries, supplies to clean, you relay this to him, often finding him in his study reading or in the greenhouse, pruning exotic plants. he never gives you more than nods and grunted words of acquiescence, but despite his temperament, he always provides what you ask for.

he's surprised by your tenacity. by your boldness, to ask for so much, even if it's not for your direct benefit. when you cook dinner each night, you make a serving for him as well. he can admit, begrudgingly, though you are in his space and disrupting his quiet, that he admires the way you chop vegetables so uniformly, that you're so careful with the way you measure out the spices he has filled his cabinets with for you.

and above all, for the first time in a long time, he feels something like desire.

he's never been intrigued by other people--he has friends, other vampires he has known for decades (kirishima and mina), but their friendship was foisted upon him until he gave in. he doesn't think he's intrigued by you. but your blood--

it has been a very long time since he has been tempted by something so sweet.

(i think there has to be so much context for this situation because i truly believe that the longer bkg is alone, the harder it is for him to let someone in. after a century of shutting himself away, it would be almost impossible for him to open himself back up in any significant way. it's the situation that allows for this desire to grow. the lack of anything else to hold his attention, the feeling of achieving everything you've ever wanted to achieve and having nothing left to strive for, the unobtrusive yet spellbinding nature of your presence. he remembers what it was like to want something. this, at first, is what draws him to you. nothing more.)

vampires are always hungry. even when sated, they know that hunger is going to return. there's nothing to stop it. it's the nature of their existence. so yes, at first, it's his hunger that draws him to you, though he wouldn't ever do anything about it.

he talks to you more. finds out things about you. your father was a drunkard and you never smile with teeth. you've worked on farms since late childhood and your right pinkie is crooked from a bad break. you read romance novels late at night and deny that you've been in his library when he asks you about it.

and after dinners spent together where he doesn't eat, after early evenings when he joins you outside to feed the cows, he tells himself this pull he feels is because of that hunger. because of that desire--not for you, but for the lifeblood that nearly intoxicates him just by scent if he gets too close to you.

(though you are aware of his Otherness, he is disarming to you. it's something about the earnestness in everything he does, despite his gruff exterior. he seems rusty at conversation, but his efforts are genuine. he doesn't eat your food, but he picks at it so as to not make you feel bad. you find this more endearing than you care to say aloud.)

and then kirishima and mina visit, and they meet you, his new human employee that lives in his castle and reads his books and touches his shoulder gently when he steadies a ladder for them so they can rehang one of the long-covered paintings in the drawing room, as if he has ever let anyone touch him, as if he has ever let anyone close enough to try--

and it's kirishima that finally asks what's going on, and when bkg says nothing, obviously, he asks again because he knows his best friend better than anyone else in the world--now, perhaps, better than anyone except you--and the truth is more simple than expected.

for so long, bkg had only ever experienced desire as hunger. hunger for blood, hunger for power, hunger for everything greater in the world. he was hungry to be the best. whatever that meant. because becoming the best meant that no one could question him. no one could doubt that he was powerful and all the things that came along with it. no one but himself. surely, he had thought, once he got to the top he would stop having those doubts because he would, unassailably, be the best.

just like hunger, doubt is something that can never be truly sated.

and for a long time he sat with that.

but then, to his own surprise, he was shown that desire can be something other than hunger. something softer, a smile with less teeth. desire can be vegetables chopped precisely, or dirt from the fields caked under fingernails, or a badly-healed little finger. desire can be a gentle hand on his shoulder, an act of trust: i know you'll be there to steady me.

he never knew he could want something without being hungry. never knew he could have his teeth to someone's throat without drawing blood. but now it's all he wants to do.

#i like am going insane over this #willow i'm SO sorry it's a big ass thing #like this has been living in my head for so long #the idea of him being like. i want i want i want and not knowing how to separate that from the hunger he's always had #and then learning. and then realizing that desire without hunger can be even more fulfilling than the ravenous want he felt throughout yout #like omg.....#thank u for sending in an ask. i am honored #HONORED #and i am sorry for my fuckin. rant lmaoooooooooooo #please whenever u want to talk about vampire bkg. hmu #i'm obsessed

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strangefable · 7 months

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The Chariot

Micah Hale, Deputy, Hope County Sheriff Department

The Chariot is a card of willpower, transformation, confidence and determination. It's a card of forward movement and action, determinedly pushing into victory and overcoming challenges. It's a card of intention and resolve, facing obstacles head-on and never backing down.

For Micah, her motorcycle is her chariot, a symbol of her sense of self and her sense of freedom. The wings and antlers are symbolic of both her past and the guiding forces in her life, as well as representing her status as 'Rook' and her place with the Whitetail Militia.

Instead of the traditional wand, she's holding scales, weighed with planes. The allusion to John is obvious, as is her precarious balance between the Resistance and the Project; her torn loyalties and her desire to balance them despite all odds being against her.

Her sphinxes are Boomer and Peaches, opposing forces of their own that she walks between, keeping them together and working smoothly, and earning the loyalty of difficult and varied personalities.

Ultimately, she's a harbinger to both the Project and the Resistance, a hero and villain to both sides of the conflict, desperately, and vainly, trying to forge a path to peace.

She fits both upright and reversed readings of the card, as torn as she is in an impossible scenario she can't win, yet she never quite gives up.

All my deepest heartfelt gratitude to @redreart for so beautifully bringing this concept to life for me. She took my idea and turned it into something beyond my wildest dreams. The details are so perfect, from the colors to Micah's hair... every little bit is all I could've asked for and more. Thank you for bringing my girl to life so incredibly! <3 If you get the opportunity for a commission, don't hesitate! <3 <3

#micah hale #fc5 #far cry 5 #fc5 deputy #boomer #peaches #tarot #the chariot #redreart #awesome art #commission for me #this is everything to me absolutely *everything*#my birthday is next week and i couldn't have asked for better timing #i tried to make a proper write-up but i'm absolutely beside myself over this so forgive me if it's a little incoherent #it's so so so so perfect better than even my imagination #my whole heart is in this piece #it's HER and it's got just the right infusions of john happening and i'm just completely obsessed #my baby my deputy my girl look at her #thank you again redre <3 <3 <3

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marimayscarlett · 7 months

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Quick question, have we figured out why Richard is so damn ATTRACTIVE??? Like he was so fine during the Mutter and MiG Era but he's even better now??? Sir I have questions!!!! What is it about you that's so addictive??? And that belly??? A MASTERPIECE!!!! He needs to pay for my rehab I'm dying over him at this point lmao

Hi hello how did you get into my head and write down exactly what I think about daily?? Because I'm still so fascinated regarding how he changed over the years, while remaining so enticing and attractive, always reinventing himself a bit, experimenting with different looks and styles while maintaining his overall vibe and aesthetic 😌 This of course includes his physique and wonderful chunkiness, but I'll shamelessly use this ask to venture out in earlier decades, to appreciate this man in all his glory 😩 (I hope that's alright with you)

Let's take a tiny look at Mr. Richard Z. Kruspe over the years, just to process this delicious evolution of his:

Very early on we had a lean Richard with the dreads, for some a no-go, for others quite a charming look (i know exactly i'm not the only one who's down for dreadlock Richard 👀), picture from ca. 1993:

In the beginning of Rammstein, we have some brown and blond haired, somewhat muscly Richard (ca. 1995/1996):

Then of course the ethereal look of Live aus Berlin (recorded in 1998) and his general style during the Sehnsucht era (Viva interview from 1997):

Moving on to the Mutter era, the first time his iconic spiky black hair was introduced to the world (picture from 2001 in Tallinn, gif from 2001 at the Velodrom Berlin):

He maintained a similar style and physique (very much toned and gym-trained I guess) or a while, for example during Völkerball (recorded in 2005):

or in various music videos, such as "Mein Teil" (2004) and "Benzin" (2005, albeit with some very much 2000s eyebrows):

In 2009 while LIFAD was released and during the LIFAD tour, he shortly ventured into another hair style (I won't comment, it was.. something, picture of 2009), then again back to the spiky style and tried out the mohawk (picture from 2012 I think), while parts of his typical stage outfit were born plus he's rather muscly here too:

During the festival tour 2016/2017 you can slowly see him becoming a bit broader/meatier in his physique, which I find just absolutely wonderful, plus some combacks like his spiky hair (gifs from an interview in 2018):

And slowly but surely we arrive in the current time and Richard's current style and physique: vampire coat, chicken coat, meaty and chunky Richard in all his glory:

All in all I have to say: It's so interesting to see how he changed and still stayed true to himself and his aesthetic, to his enthusiastic and genuine self while continously trying out new styles. And this includes his physique!! His appearance of course changed over the span of 30 years, that's aging for you. Of course he put on some weight - but that doesn't negate the fact that someone can be unbelievably attractive. And yes, I wholeheartedly agree, his belly now is a master piece, forged by the heavens, a gift from god, just perfection 💖

#WOW ok this took a long time to answer sorry I kind of lost track looking at.. him #this got way out of hand AGAIN #why do i have zero control over me when it comes to answering asks idk why I always go so overboard regarding richard #i'm so sorry for everyone who has to witness this obsession of mine #i promise you i'm kind of normal still #thank you for this ask!!#rammstein #richard kruspe #rzk

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respectthepetty · 7 months

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Not to rehash the kiss discourse but if you look at the the official twitter account they posted BTS pics of ep 6 and it looks like the first take of that kiss scene was better.

https://twitter.com/Dangerous_Rom/status/1705230453761036623

So I wonder why they reshot the scene later. I know PerthChimon can do better so that’s giving me a little bit more faith that the next kisses won’t be as awkward.

I'm going to believe that the kiss we got in the show was intentional because the length of that scene was too long for Lit Phadung, the director, to think "Oh, yeah, that's sooooo amazing." Mostly when this is the same man who directed these kisses in Love Mechanics and Love in Translation.

He was also the director for SOTUS, so he knows how to film kisses without them being intrusive.

Yet he was all up in the actors' business for Dangerous Romance.

So I'm taking a leap of faith in Director Lit that he decided whatever kiss he filmed the first time around was not right for the moment

So we got a reshoot.

About that kiss, @kessthenorthface perfectly summed up in the tags of a post how I feel about it.

I'm sure they reshot several scenes (from the trailer and previews) which tends to happen because Chimon's hair is longer in some scenes than what we got in the official trailer and the romantic trailer. I mentioned this in my other post about the possibility of a kiss happening in episode 7 as well because I think this scene

is now this scene (which thank goodness because Chimon with wavy longer hair is the glow up we all deserve to witness).

Be My Favorite taught me to have faith because I was skeptical of Krist and Fluke kissing, yet the kisses were soft and sweet, so since we KNOW Perth can kiss, and even though my OG Slut for Christ Chimon hasn't kissed a guy yet been in several BLs and even the lead in Sweet Boy (@twig-tea, this is for you!), I'm going to believe they will pull it off.

But even if they don't, I'm going to place it in the "Grand Scheme of Things" pile - the show is still giving me everything I need, I watched enough awful Korean BL kisses to be okay with it, EarthMix only kiss in the last episode of their series, and Cherry Magic didn't even give us a kiss until the movie, so . . . in the Grand Scheme of Things, this kiss isn't a biggie.

Even though I'm absolutely 100% totally obsessed with it.

#dangerous romance #that kiss #I'm obsessed with it #thanks for asking #sailom x kanghan #Even if I didn't have faith in the actors (which I do)#I have faith in the director #he knows how to fix this with angles #yet he gave us that #it's intentional in my book

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daydreamerwonderkid · 1 day

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since we've established that you're 'country enough' whose your favorite country icon?

Gifs courtesy of @shania-twain

#dreamer ask #anon ask #dolly parton #dolly is an icon #and I've been obsessed with her #probably my entire life #also love the fact #I'm receiving quote unquote #validation for being country enough #like that's actually a thing haha #awesome question anon #thank you <3

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whywoulditho · 7 days

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ough... sorry for jumping in when you said you're still reading stuff, i hope this doesn't come off annoying or anything! but that thing the prev anon said about timkon is... a WILD take.

tim wasn't trying to "replace" kon, he was having a grief-induced mental health spiral and was doing anything and everything to get a chance of getting his best friend back. (the "resurrection of ra's al ghul" event goes over this too - tim and dick have a short fight that ends in tim crying in dick's arms because tim was tempted to use a lazarus pit to try and bring back his dad, steph brown, and/or kon.) it's an unhealthy coping mechanism he exhibits during a period of his life where he's experienced several catastrophic losses back to back, and he's coping poorly. moreover he literally apologized to kon for trying to clone him in adventure comics (2009) #3.

also saying that kon is created as a replacement for superman is true, but acting like he never has an established character outside of "replacement for superman" or that other characters treat him as just a replacement superman, is not. in world's finest three (tim and kon's first meeting) we literally see tim initially turn to kon for backup with metallo, a superman villain, and at first he's dismayed that kon doesn't have all of superman's abilities, but over the course of the two issues, he admires kon's use of his ttk and they establish a mutual respect with each other (they both save each other's lives at the end).

and generally, kon & clark have a very positive relationship in postcrisis comics (aka the continuity that the cloning stuff with tim happens in) - if you want to see more of it, i'd rec "adventures of superman" #506 and superboy (1994) #59 and #70. kon definitely has plenty of issues, but his identity and relationship to superman aren't really the ones in question. (although i'll admit there is the caveat that kon's [lack of] superman-related identity issues is kind of soft retconned in teen titans (2003), which is where the lex luthor retcon is introduced - fun fact, luthor has nothing to do with kon initially!)

this got long i'm SO sorry - it just gets my goat when people tell straight up lies about comics to people who are just getting into reading comics 😭😭 i hope i didn't come off aggressive bc thats def not my intention but i'm sorry if i did!! and i hope you enjoy your comic journey and have fun with it overall!!!

do NOT apologize! i really appreciate this!!

i have a couple more people on my inbox yelling things like "how dare you even entertain the thought of them together!!!" i wasnt expecting to see so much passion on this subject when i first talked about it but it seems like DC comics fans have very strong opinions about that pairing hahaa

as i said in my previous reply to that anon, i really need to do my own reading before i form an opinion on the ship but your reflections seem very fair and i really appreciate the comic recommendations! and honestly, the whole reason i was interested in timkon was that their relationship seemed very complicated, and therefore very angsty, which is what i live for. so i do really understand why some people like it and some hate the idea of it. from what i've seen so far.... i like it. but i can't really speak on whether or not it is compatible with the canon dynamic of the characters. does that make sense?

also like on another note. HOW do you guys give such specific references when talking about these things?? 😭 DC universe seems HUGE and i have no clue where to start and then i see people giving like the exact issue number of events and stuff and i'm like.....HOW?? and also like. teach me. guide me. i'm lost 😭 HQJSKFKCJDJ

#anyway thanks for the explaination!!#in all honesty i enjoy how chaotic DC fans are #like why are you so obsessed with hating on a pairing?? but also i admire your dedication so much 😭#and like. this debate will probably never end and that makes me giddy #lolll #on another note my asks are STILL always open for anyone. drop that essay i'm listening #asks #timkon #discussions #DC comics #dc

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boyfridged · 1 year

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You may have already mentioned this in some of your other metas, and I just missed it, so please ignore this if it's redundant.

Do you think Bruce is projecting onto Jason by pushing him as a Robin? Obviously, Jason wanted to be Robin and was excited about it, and Bruce let Jason do other things, but (if I'm not mistaken) before Tim came into play, solidifying the whole Batman needs a Robin/support to keep him upright, Bruce and Dick becoming Batman and Robin, in the beginning, was also sort of a coping mechanism.

I think there are a few examples of Bruce enabling this kind of mindset. Like in Gotham Knights #43–44 (sorry), every time Barbara brings up Jason's inner turmoil, Bruce refocuses on his ability as a Robin; similarly, when Jason finds out about Two-Face and his dad, he is hurt, and Bruce acknowledges that but then does the same thing, zeroing in on reassuring Jason that he made a mistake but is still a good Robin.

Like, Jason got it from Bruce, but he unintentionally encouraged that kind of thinking.

oh, i definitely think that bruce is projecting on jason and that it profoundly affected jay. and, while every single one of your observations is apt, i would add that what truly made it so tragic is that he projected his own worst traits on jason while being blind to the fact that jay already shared his best qualities.

tldr: bruce projects himself on jason in terms of grief (saying that jason needs vigilantism to work his grief through) and sees his own worst traits in jason (anger) but doesn't see his own best traits in jay (compassion, love, and sensitivity). ironically, jason does end up developing all of the (projected) worst characteristics of bruce (obsessiveness, and relentlessness in pursuit of the respective perceived idea of justice). this happens even though they were barely present in his early storylines, and only ever manifested when jason was scared or lost. later, they truly came to be because of his trauma relating to vigilantism.

and the long, long version, coming with panels and quotes: under the cut.

first i want to say that the following analysis focuses very specifically on bruce's mistakes, but i don't view the overall of jay's upbringing by bruce solely in these terms. from text it is also clear that bruce deeply loves and cares about jay, and that jay enjoys being robin. now that this is clear, let's get to particularities, and start with jay's origin story.

i truly never stop thinking about the significance of bruce meeting jay in the crime alley, the place of his parents' death. there's a lot to be said about it, but here the focus is, of course, on the fact that he sees a little boy, very much similar to himself, angry and hurt, in the same scenery that brought him so much grief. and jay in some ways does appear to be a mirror of bruce's own agonies, as well as a mirror of his own inclination for seeking justice; and somehow, bruce fixates on the first one, while almost completely dismissing the latter.

bruce looks at him and assumes that the remedy to jason's pain and anger is being robin; and he doesn't stop to think about it. (it has to be noted that there's also classism at play, classism that is mostly a result of writers' own beliefs – collins did state in a couple of interviews that that the motivation behind jason's background was to make his introduction into vigilantism seem less offensive, as jason has already been exposed to crime...)

i think, in this context, it's interesting to look at the two-face storyline even closer, and from the start too. in the beginning, bruce talks of jason's 'street' roots and assumes jay would go "down the same criminal road that took his father [willis] to an early death." he also talks of jason making a lot of progress. later, in batman #411, after jason learns that willis has been killed by two-face, bruce comments that jay "has never been like this...listless...almost pouting--"

this all, along with jay's cheerful and diligent behaviour from the previous issue builds an interesting picture for us: because we essentially learn that jay has been overall an unproblematic child. bruce, of course, attributes this "progress" to the training. however, for anyone else, the logical conclusion would be that jay's quick adjustment was simply a matter of finding himself in a safe and stable environment and receiving continuous support and attention from a parental figure. i find it rather questionable that jason's personality softened down because he had something to punch in the cave–– the more intuitive explanation is of course that he was angry and quick to fight when they first met because he couldn't afford anything else and because he was scared. but months later, in a loving home, he can allow himself to drop his guard; and his cocky attitude disappears until much later.

so the rather unsettling picture that we derive is that bruce is training jay to become a vigilante in order to "channel" his (nonvisible at this point) anger into something useful and just. and he clearly links this to his own trauma in batman #416 (that’s already starlin btw), in his conversation with dick, explaining why he took jay in: “he’s so full of anger and frustration… he reminds me of myself, just after my parents were killed.” bruce also mentions that soon after their first meeting, jason helped him and "handled himself well" in the fight, but he doesn't mention that jay has ran away from a crime "school" and intended to stop injustice on his own only because he was ignored.

the theme of bruce comparing jay to himself appears again in detective comics #574 (barr), where it is approached with a much more... critical look, thanks to leslie's presence and her skepticism of bruce's actions. after jason has suffered nearly fatal injuries at the hand of the mad hatter, bruce reminisces on his own trauma and motives. he tells leslie: "i didn't choose jason for my work. he was chosen by it...as i was chosen." leslie replies: "stop that! (...) you do this for yourself... you're still that little boy (...)" then, the conversation steers to the familiar ground and the topic of anger. in bruce's words, again: “i wanted to give jason an outlet for his rage…wanted him to expunge his anger and get on with his life…” and finishes "and instead, i may have killed him."

the recognition that bruce's projection on jason and involving him with his work might have fatal consequences is, as always, fast forgotten once jay wakes up and proclaims that he wants to continue his work as robin.

but to circle back, i think there's something else worth our attention, something deeply ironic, that is showcased in that issue: that bruce has no evidence for jay's "rage." when leslie talks of bruce's past, she recalls his tendencies to get into brutal fights at perceived injustice as early as in school; when bruce talks of jason, two pictures that are juxtaposed, are that of jason fighting as robin and jason... smiling, playing baseball.

so, in the early days of jason's training and work in the field, we see bruce talking of jason's anger a lot; but we barely see it.

that being said, jay is angry sometimes– and i think your observation about how bruce deals with it is incredibly interesting and accurate.

we first see jay truly and devastatingly angry in the two-face storyline. bruce focuses on jay's reaction as robin, which is, in fact, aggressive. but something that he barely addresses is that jason's first reaction is sleeping all day, and not beating anyone to a pulp; in fact, this vengeful instinct seems to arise only when he is put right in front of two-face. and his third instinct, once the rage (very quickly) dies down after the altercation with two-face, is crying, because bruce hid the truth about willis' death from him. jay, while crying, asks bruce: "you have taken me out into combat-- but you spare me this?" in response, bruce lectures jason about how grief inspires revenge, which is, again, deeply ironic, given that jay seeking out revenge seemed to be prompted and enabled solely by the role of robin. moreover, his question suggests that at this point he saw grief ("you spare me this") and fighting as two different things.

the final is, as you said, bruce focusing on making it into a lesson on vigilantism, or, in his own words, "tempering revenge into justice." personally, i think in this way bruce directs jason to bring his grief into the field as a powering force, something that he didn't necessarily have an own incentive to do. the flash of compartmentalisation between his ordinary life and being a sidekick that jay has shown by questioning bruce's decision is lost. emotions are now a robin thing, and they have an (informal) protocol, a moral code. and when jay is confronted with an emotionally exhausting case next – the garzonas case, i believe that the focus on "tempering revenge into justice" is exactly the problem– we don't see jay crying, we see him frantic about finding the solution. this, right there, is bruce's obsessiveness, that in my opinion, was developed in jay specifically as a result of how his engagement with vigilantism combines with his deep sensitivity.

and, needless to say, his sensitivity is all the same as that of bruce – they both can't stand looking at other people hurting, they both wear their hearts on their sleeve, caring way too much – the thing is, bruce never quite acknowledges how they are similar in this matter. instead, he focuses on his sparse bursts of anger, wanting to bring jason closure in his grief the only way he knows it – in a fight for a better world. so, as you said, he focuses on jason's ability as robin.

which just doesn't work for jason. at all. we know it from how his robin run comes to an end: in the first issue of a death in the family (batman #426) alfred informs: “i’ve come upon him, several times, looking at that battered old photograph of his mother and father, crying.” to that, bruce contends: “in other words, i may have started jason as robin before he had a chance to come to grips with his parents deaths.” he also tells jay that the field is not a place for someone who is hurting; a message that is the opposite of what he's been saying for years now, and something that i imagine was difficult for bruce to conceptualise, because then he would have to question his own unhealthy tendencies. it's a bit late to come to this realisation; bruce's self-projection that caused him to worry so much about jay's anger has already turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy that will fully manifest itself in utrh, when jason does the only thing he was taught to do with grief: try to channel it into justice.

#AHHH this took me so long for no reason at all. so sorry anon <3 #anyway. i'm obsessed with your observation regarding bruce's focus on robin in the two-face storyline #i've already briefly considered it but you made me go back and reread it #and i just stared at these panels of jason in bed all day for like good 5 minutes thinking. jesus christ. jesus christ #“you spare me *this*?” <- this line is making me feel SICK TO MY STOMACH.#so maybe bruce is right when he says that he made jason like this in tfz.#and jay is of course even more right when he says that he didn't make him. he raised him #also don't apologise for bringing in gotham knights #i actually talked about it some before because it is a very good illustration of bruce projecting on jay #<- i didn't include it here bc my post was getting insanely long.#anyway back on the topic. i think it's so deeply sad that jay genuinely has no idea #that this is what bruce thinks #i think he would be DEVASTATED if he knew the way bruce fixated on the idea of his anger #hm. normal now.#thank you so much for this ask. you can tell i was delighted to answer it <3 #i actually already had a draft about it when you sent it... but i'm sooo slow with editing my word vomit #outbox #jay.zip #jay.txt #dc #jason todd #core texts

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