AU Thursday: Valicer In The Dark Vs Baldur's Gate III

Okay, so, yesterday I happened to mention that I'd gotten into Baldur's Gate III -- and that a certain Crime Trio of mine (based on an entirely different RPG, I might add), had decided to lay claim to it as a potential AU of their OWN AU. No, I don't know why I'm like this either. *sigh* Anyway, there's not really that much to it at this point in time -- while I have spoiled myself on the story (and seen a bunch of cutscenes thanks to my friend @gaydragonwizards), I haven't actually played that much of the game itself and thus don't know exactly how the trio would react to EVERY quest and NPC in the game. I do know some basics, though:

-->The AU starts with the Nautiloid happening to pop into the Valicer In The Dark universe by mistake while navigating -- the mind flayers decide they may as well abduct some people while they're here, and unfortunately Victor, Alice, and Smiler, walking the streets of Six Towers, are in range of the tentacles and taken aboard to be infected

-->Smiler wakes up in the canonical pod and finds their way to Us, saving them and immediately bonding with the little intellect devourer ("I'm a they/them too!"); Alice wakes up in a different pod nearby and is the first to meet Lae'zel, and helps her fight the imps; and Victor wakes up in the same room as Shadowheart, and is working on freeing her when the others arrive -- they get her out, get to the helm, and manage to fight their way to the transponder and connect the nerves

-->If you're wondering about potential language barriers, one of the good things about the tadpoles randomly connecting your mind to other people's is that it allows you to pick up Common super fast -- I basically see them getting a bit of an "information dump" on a few key things about the reality they're currently in during the initial connections

-->Also, in the process of freeing Shadowheart, the group find that woman in the other room and mess with her console, accidentally causing her to change -- a creepy moment made even creepier by Victor's Ghost Mind ability letting him briefly see the woman's soul escape...and then burn up as she transforms into a mind flayer. We will come back to this later

-->After the crash landing, Victor, Alice, and Smiler are very confused when they wake up to see a blue sky...and then, after waking up Shadowheart and being told, essentially, "it's blue because it's sunny?" are utterly GOBSMACKED to find themselves in a world with an ACTUAL SUN. Though shock and delight quickly turn to "oh wow, this is actually a lot hotter than we're used to, we need to find lighter clothes fast" XD

-->From there, they pick up the rest of the companions and work their way through the main plot, hoping to both find a way to get the damn tadpoles out of their heads and get home (because as nice as a world with a sun is, it's not Duskwall, and Smiler in particular would like to see their parents again plz)

-->Naturally, being pretty good-hearted people, they do the nice versions of the quests and help people out as much as possible -- though, also being a group of Shadows who nick things and sabotage schemes for their living, I can see them offering tips to the gang of tiefling children thieves and scam artists to help them in their chosen path. XD Also, Alice probably has to be talked out of killing Kagha right then and there when she threatens Arabella, and I'm not sure the snake survives THAT little encounter. Alice has a thing about people threatening children, as you might expect!

-->I foresee a lot of confusion on both sides about how different Duskwall and the Shattered Isles are from Faerun -- not just the sun thing, but also Victor having access to an entirely different form of magic (Gale in particular is like "wtf is this??? This is not Weave???"); the group not knowing what horses or cows are (both animals are extinct in their world) and having to be introduced to them -- while, on the flip side, being perfectly cool with eating rat; and the trio being briefly like "well, it's horrible what happened to that poor woman on the Nautiloid, but at least her ghost won't be slowly going insane and trying to feast on the life essence of the living" and the others being like "what." Leading to Victor, Alice, and Smiler learning that this world has an afterlife and being like D: as it dawns on them that the total destruction of the soul is not an accepted way to keep the world from being riddled from ghosts here. (The others are once again like "what the FUCK is wrong with your reality?")

-->Smiler spends a good portion of the early game looking for Us, before finally accepting sadly that the intellect devourer probably didn't survive the crash...and then they get to the mind flayer colony under Moonrise in Act Two and "Friend! You found the helm!" :D They are beyond happy to see Us and won't hear a word said against them from the other companions (who are naturally BAFFLED as to why Smiler wants an intellect devourer as a pet) -- and Us, for their part, is entirely loyal to their friend Smiler and all THEIR friends, because the kindness Smiler showed to them on the Nautiloid caused them to bond more closely with them than the rest of the hive :) Victor and Alice warm up to the little thing pretty quick, while the others...well, they get used to having a brain wandering around pretending to be a kitty. XD

-->Part of me would like Shar to somehow be responsible for the Shattered Isles no longer having a sun...and thus be real annoyed that people are still living in that world eight hundred and forty-seven years later (as Alice puts it, "you brought the darkness, and we just lit it back up again")

-->And in the "overpowered nonsense that wouldn't make it into any actual story stuff but is fun to think about," I enjoy pondering the possibility of the trio, when faced with the Avatar of Myrkul, using Victor's Whisper ghost-fighting stuff on it -- and successfully forcing it into a spirit bottle. I imagine the other companions would be like "how the FUCK did you bottle part of a GOD?!" while Myrkul would be just "...guess it beats dying again." Oh, and Withers finds it hilarious in his droll way. XD Bonus points for talking to Myrkul about what the damn plan with the Absolute even gets him, Myrkul realizing that he's somehow been had by the Netherbrain, and switching sides against his former compatriots because, yeah, this mind flayer invasion does NOT benefit him in any way, wtf.

-->Or, if you would like DIFFERENT godly intervention, I did have an idea where Mar-Mal is also able to access Faerun through the blessing they gave Smiler, and uses its influence to protect Smiler from the tadpole instead of Smiler having to rely on the Dream Visitor and the artifact. They task Smiler with spreading their influence and getting worshipers so Mar-Mal can do more on this plane, and Smiler happily talks up their god to anyone who will listen (also sharing what samples they have left of their Joy Serum). And fortunately for them, people are willing to throw at least a few prayers the way of a god of pure happiness...meaning that during the endgame, when it's time to fight the Netherbrain, Mar-Mal's gotten just enough power to come into Faerun, filling the sky with spiral clouds as they manifest. The gang still has to fight the Netherbrain, but it's easier as the Netherbrain is, um, a bit distracted trying to not be mindwarped by Mar-Mal! XD And once the threat is defeated, Mar-Mal is able to open up a temporary portal to bring Victor, Alice, and Smiler home. With the implication that they could get back eventually...like, say, in six months to catch up. :p

Whew -- bit more than I expected here! I don't know if anything is actually going to come from this -- I mean, I definitely have to get the REGULAR Valicer In The Dark stuff done first -- but it's fun to think about as I play the game. And it has inspired me to make a few not-incorrect quotes/shitposty scenes...

"chilchuck isn't a twink, he's a DILF!" now i get why you're saying that but i feel like you've maybe forgotten what chilchuck tims canonically looks like

i'm sorry but this man is a twink. also DILF isn't a body type it's a status (and technically, an opinion) so he can be both

"but he's middle-aged!" look at him. look with your eyeballs. his age has nothing to do with the fact that he Looks Like That. he's a twink. the sooner you accept this the less angry his fandom will make you

edit bc this post has become the bane of my existence:

FAQ

Q: wtf do you mean he's a dad? he looks like a kid. A: he is 29 years old, and a half-foot. half-foots are dungeon meshi's halflings, or hobbits, or whatever you want to call them.

Q: wait, if he's 29, why the fuck are you calling him middle-aged? A: half-foots have an average lifespan of 50 years. chilchuck was originally drawn with grey hairs (you can see that in the manga fullbody) but the mangaka gave up on that over time. he's middle-aged for his race.

Q: hey, doesn't that look like a little angry face on his boot in the manga drawing? A: yea kinda

Happy Valentine's Day! (and this blog's first post anniversary!)

Pokemon trainer AU, Reborn is the champion meanwhile Tsuna is his apprentice. Tsuna’s design belongs to my friend @Cloud_Knee (Twt or X)

One of the many Wolf 359 script directions that is Important To Me is this bit from Ep15 What's Up, Doc?, which comes after Hilbert has been threatening to tell Minkowski how Eiffel ended up on the Hephaestus:

"Stop saying Crowley won't help Aziraphale in S3 he'd go back to him in a HEARTBEAT and nothing would stop him" I get it no one likes the idea of Crowley being bitter after what happened for a long period of time but like can we at least acknowledge that he's currently going through probably the most emotional pain in his life since falling? Can we agree that he's opened his heart entirely - something you couldn't pay him to do unless the world is literally ending and he's desperate - to Aziraphale, and got shot down? Can we understand that he did it AGAIN only to lose Aziraphale again? Not that what Aziraphale did isn't without Crowley's own shortcomings (hiding the truth of Heaven's cruelty from him) but like,,,,

The appeal here isn't Scorned Crowley Doesn't Love Aziraphale Anymore, or Never Wants To Help Him Again, the appeal here is Crowley learning enough self respect to not just walk back right to Aziraphale like nothing happened after Aziraphale has had a pattern of consistently refusing him. Going years ping-ponging between "We're not friends I don't even know him" to "That's what friends are for right?" and "We're friends, why would you even say anything?" and "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon!"

Like I get it, Crowley is a heartbreakingly forgiving person. Of course he's gonna forgive Aziraphale, I'll be surprised if he didn't forgive him by the time he walked out the bookshop door, but gdi he could at least grant himself the luxury of being at least a little irritated for longer than however long it takes to make a globe and some books float and angrily cry out to God in his flat. But due to the change of pace and dynamic that is establishing part of the conflict for Season 3, I just really like the idea of him for ONCE prioritizing himself and being like "Okay, fine. We'll get back at it when you're ready, then," instead of just taking Aziraphale back like his words and actions meant nothing to him, when clearly they have an effect on him.

What is Aziraphale going to learn if Crowley just accepts what he did so quickly, like he always has the entire time they've been friends? Idk maybe I'm just projecting too much darkness on their dynamic but I mean, if the pattern of Aziraphale pushing Crowley away/disrespecting him one day and then being fine with his friendship the next + Crowley never stopping to be like "Hey, that's not cool, at least give me a little credit" or smth was fine all along and will continue to be fine in the future, then why, after 6,000 years of being friends and loving this demon, can Aziraphale still not accept that Crowley is just fine the way he is, and instead got excited to promote him to an angel in a heartbeat once the opportunity presented itself? You can't blame all of it on Heaven when Aziraphale has demonstrated his free will/defiance to Heaven so many times. Or, I don't know, I guess maybe we can? Maybe I'm just craving too much angst to the point where I'm letting it cloud my analysis of canon. Idk.

Teamwork!

What if I did this and never finished it. What then.

Thinking thoughts about Abuela being back and with this backstory about her being taken in by charlatans and Eddies whole catholic guilt thing and how the two things kind of play into one another as an exploration of faith and being taken in by something.

Abuela giving all her money to the tarot card readers etc because she was searching for something - for connection (with Abuelo) - trying to recapture what she had lost, and How Eddie has spoken about trying to re-find the magic he had with Shannon - how Eddie hasn't actually fully reconciled the Shannon of it all when it comes to relationships and how his Catholic guilt connects into that.

How Marisol as a physical representation of Catholicism is part of that narrative - how Eddie is entering a place where he has to chose his path - in order to move on from Shannon he needs to fully square the hole - catholic or non catholic. And how that needs to happen first - before he can begin his queer journey!

Textpost time yay! :-)

Okay but can we just talk about how Leo, Raph, Donnie and Mikey can FINALLY go to actual fucking therapy for once in this iteration of TMNT???

omg wait yeah a notif tag about the "isopods are cringe" thing just reminded me: you ever see that post on here with an addition where someone shyly tagged it with, "I know possums are "out" but-" what do you mean out they're an animal 😭 don't let people who twist themselves up trying to be unauthentically different to stay on trend make you insecure, none of this matters

like ready to be proven wrong, but I don't think that Cadsuane is necessarily gonna appear any earlier than she did in the books. I think they're just setting her up better than in the books (ie not introducing her as an important player like right before she shows up and expecting us to be impressed by that)

two wrongs WILL make a right! ive got another lease on life, and im using it well, who cares if this is all fucked up cause we're all GOING TO HELL! IM JUST WILLIAM WHO SHOULD BE DEAD, HAD TO FOLLOW THE THREAD, thought he was just chillin! now he is a villain! HES ALWAYS SUCH A BUMMER, HE WANTS TO TRUST HIS BROTHER WILLIAM IN A HALLWAY BY HIMSEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"

the majority voted for me to not photoshop and just work on the valentines day art to be posted later in the month. and yea I will do that. but I already started photoshoping regardless. so happy belated birthday Grelle!!

I was originally making William into Sebster, plus Nardo's face shape worked a lot more for William than it did for Sebs, and could I have just imported a whole new face in there? yea, but it would have taken longer, may not have looked great... plus I accepted that in the end, I do afterall headcanon Bassy to be Grelle's side toy while Will is her main. so she would want this.

Lightning, water, and fire! Like forever before the plot starts. By the time the plot starts, the lightning and fire deities have been subjected to punishment by the two gods that picked them.

Oh (the fire deity) is first to be punished. They basically decide that since they're going to live for a long time, gotta set some long time goals! And they opt to be the wrath of the gods since most of the other deities are too 'soft' in their opinion. So Oh just. Smites humans. This isn't really a /good/ thing and in their defense mentally, they do it to help Ymber since he's the softest of them all. So their punishment by the gods is to be split in two, effectively halving the power of one into two. (Now they are in a male and a female body and use both male and female pronouns apart since they together make they but apart it feels weird to be they. But prior to the split they use they/them. Also the split bodies go by the names Ohiwe and Ohime.)

Fulj is the second to be punished. She falls in love with a mortal woman and that is a crime according to the gods. Mortals and immortals are not to be together and it will only bring suffering to both sides. So her punishment is her memories of the woman are stripped and her body basically broken to the point she can't remain physical all the time.

Ymber, unfortunately, is the one who blames himself for the discoveries and punishments. If he had only tried to restrain Oh more then maybe they would have chilled out and stopped before being punished. If he had only tried to persuade Fulj to not continue seeing the mortal woman so often perhaps she wouldn't have been punished. So he's just increasing the guilt on his shoulders every day that he remains unpunished since the elder gods have both laid down to rest. They can't enforce their laws anymore and none of the deities are keen on harming one another at this point. They just want to continue existing in peace.