Gimmick blog where I just @ summon other blogs and pretend I’m interviewing them or add annotations like I’m a field reporter live at the scene of a news segment.

People can summon me by saying things like “discourse is heating up in the stationary fandom, we take you now live to our @shitpost-field-reporter who is live at the scene of the post” on some post about journal sizing

And then I’ll be like “thanks @willypadilly . As the new year has started, people who are into performative journaling debate the best kind of dot notebook. This year’s surprising new controversy is the shockingly low to complete lack of blood in the page ink in books marketed towards wizards. I’m here with @wizard-shitposter-extraordinaire to talk about this breaking scandal. @wizard-shitposter-extraordinaire, can you tell us how we are just finding out about these deceptively marketed tomes and what the spell crafting community can do about them?”

I KNOW the Pacific Rim sequel was “not very good” and “not well received” and “didn’t make that much sense” but hear me out: make a third one bc Newt’s mind-controlled-evil-scientist arch is boss bitch material, and he is very hot & sexy I would like to see him again

AND HEAR ME OUT. It would only be HERMANN who could save him in the end bc they are in love, and he is the only character the audience have seen Newt have any connection with, but more importantly because they are gay.

Do u think if Bret used the right hair products his hair would look like Kenny’s

robert carlyle specifically from the full monty chilchuck fancast

(I feel as though this has to have been done already but)

Revalink au where Revali is immortal and Link is reincarnated

*this was inspired by a writing prompt I saw on tiktok: a character putting bandages over the others bleeding wounds, but the character wounded is immortal and they are just preventing their healing process to keep the other close*

I have a few ideas how this could play out:

Link meets Revali all the time, maybe it’s just for a split second when they make small talk on the subway or by teaming up to fight an ancient evil for the 50th time and Link dies in the process. Revali always knows it’s Link but wether Link knows about Revali being immortal or the reincarnation cycle, Revali always keeps it secret, not wanting to ruin what little time they may have or scare him away

Or maybe it’s a soulmate au and they somehow always find each other in the chaos of life

Or a combination of the two

But Link will never remember Revali from his last life, so depending on how long or intensely Revali had gotten to know past Link, his approach towards Links current self will vary.

I feel like I always lean towards hylian - ish Revali in these scenarios but I like Rito Revali for this one bc then this can go from ancient hyrule to a modern hyrule and Rito and Zora etc. will still be part of modern society (usually if I do modern AUs that still deal with the calamity I just say that the other races - except the gerudo - died out 😧)

Soo I will be adding this one to my list

Guys…What if…Sodo/Dew…Was gay…Just think about that for a moment.

fun fact: it actually was Adam and Steve until Steve transitioned

I was trying to look through BTS to figure out some episode plots and I think I might of figured it out. Micheal directs episode 6 which was done between October 31st - November 4. Most of this BTS was posted on November 4 (or a little after since they spread out what they post) and I assuming this all has to do with the luau dance episode we’ve been theorizing about.

WAIT

and

makes

WARNING 18+

19

changes and trends in horror-genre films are linked to the anxieties of the culture in its time and place. Vampires are the manifestation of grappling with sexuality; aliens, of foreign influence. Horror from the Cold War is about apathy and annihilation; classic Japanese horror is characterised by “nature’s revenge”; psychological horror plays with anxieties that absorbed its audience, like pregnancy/abortion, mental illness, femininity. Some horror presses on the bruise of being trapped in a situation with upsetting tasks to complete, especially ones that compromise you as a person - reflecting the horrors and anxieties of capitalism etc etc etc. Cosmic horror is slightly out of fashion because our culture is more comfortable with, even wistful for, “the unknown.” Monster horror now has to be aware of itself, as a contingent of people now live in the freedom and comfort of saying “I would willingly, gladly, even preferentially fuck that monster.” But I don’t know much about films or genres: that ground has been covered by cleverer people.

I don’t actually like horror or movies. What interests me at the moment is how horror of the 2020s has an element of perception and paying attention.

Multiple movies in one year discussed monsters that killed you if you perceived them. There are monsters you can’t look at; monsters that kill you instantly if you get their attention. Monsters where you have to be silent, look down, hold still: pray that they pass over you. M Zombies have changed from a hand-waved virus that covers extras in splashy gore, to insidious spores. A disaster film is called Don’t Look Up, a horror film is called Nope. Even trashy nun horror sets up strange premises of keeping your eyes fixed on something as the devil GETS you.

No idea if this is anything. (I haven’t seen any of these things because, unfortunately, I hate them.) Someone who understands better than me could say something clever here, and I hope they do.

But the thing I’m thinking about is what this will look like to the future, as the Victorian sex vampires and Cold War anxieties look to us. I think they’ll have a little sympathy, but they probably won’t. You poor little prey animals, the kids will say, you were awfully afraid of facing up to things, weren’t you?

ineffable smooches for the soul <3

they had a great time

BigB is making me lose my mind.

—

My buddy @salemoleander made a post going over all the weird stuff with BigB’s unusual Secret and it got my mind racing. The red icon... The isolating, grindy, antisocial task... The strange phrasing… Makes you think 👀

(Even if it turns out to be nothing I WILL be headcanoning lore about it hehehe)

I think I’m onto something. Has anyone ever noticed how every time you enter a room with your cat in it and they meow at you, or you say, “hi (cat’s name)!” And the meow back that it’s THE SAME meow every time? With the same lil kitty accent and everything.

I think that’s them saying the name they gave us. In other words, we could probably decode their language if we tried enough.

Clone’s Best Friend

“Cute dog!” the girl says. “What breed is he?”

“Uh,” blinks Kon. "Are you asking what breed Superdog is?"

“Uh, duh?”

Well. She’ll have to forgive him his stunned expression, ‘cause he doesn’t usually run into other dog walkers on this path. This is, of course, because “path” is used in the loosest sense, the one that connotates direction and not tread ground, and the “walk” bit is entirely inapplicable, with all of them currently flying one thousand feet above sea level.

“Cujo’s a rescue,” she continues, swinging her feet in the sky, “so we don’t know for sure, but my sister thinks part husky, part shar pei. Half-and-half, like me!”

Cujo is also, apparently, half green and half glowing. He wiggles happily in a play-bow. It’s very cute, except for the way he’s the size of a small house.

Krypto’s tough, though. He barks and chases his new friend through cloud cover. Gamely, Cujo flees. They frolic in the chilly condensation, occasionally poking a head out before diving back in, like a fox in a snowdrift.

Neither of them see anything surprising about this. It’s all good fun. And, well. Krypto’s always been a good judge of character.

Kon turns back to the girl and gives her a megawatt smile.

“He’s Kryptonian. Like me. But he looks like a white lab!”