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#I technically could have DM y’all like a normal person
starry-miki · 2 months
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Well when I said I might post something in March I didn’t actually think I’ll have something done and posted the first day on March, put it’s also an appreciation post to a small handful of people I see (semi) often for a while, I don’t know where this is coming from but I just decided to do it, like every other major “project” I do.
During my time when I was in my art slump I have missed valentines and I’m still upset by it cause I absolutely love valentines and it’s beautiful aesthetic, so this is kinda my “redemption” for it, technically white day is coming up in March but I just feel like it doesn’t feel just as special. 🥲
But I drew old man and barbs as markable plushies, and honestly turning them to markable plushies is oddly therapeutic, since it was so simple and fast. Still debating if I should do the entire side characters plus the additional trio, so I’ll see if people would like for me to do it. 🤔
Aside from that i just wish to to give my wonderful gratitude and appreciation w/ little note for those specific people, but to everyone else in general, I would like to thank you all for your patience’s and interactions, while I haven’t been that active until the last few months of last year, and once again haven’t been that active the last month, I do see people’s comments and replies and fully enjoy reading them, even if I don’t always reply back, I truly enjoy interacting with the OM community, and everyone who I’ve met thus far, and hope to continue being in the community for a while. ☺️💕
To my cutie patooties: 
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💕 @nevvn 💕
Frankly I think I might be a person of few words when it comes to expressing my feelings and really try my best to come up with something to say in the last hour but nothing comes up, all I have to say is: “you cutie patootie” and the saying: an artist will draw if they like you. 🥰💕
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💕 @blithesharem 💕
I really enjoy reading and seeing your post and your OCs and your occasional fanfics, expect that one time, I’m think I’m still in shock about it. 😀
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A few days ago I did ask if you had a persona so I could draw them into a markable plushie, but if you would prefer one of your kids (OCs) into a markable plushies that’s cool too, but would love to draw out your persona if you were to create one. 🥰💕
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💕 @yurihisachi 💕
I do see you occasionally pop up time to time in my nonfictions, but I still would like to appreciate your presence, thought it would be pretty funny if I’ve already mentioned you in post in a different username and this is a side account of some sort. But if it isn’t, feel free to contact me so I can draw you up a markable plushie of an OC you have or a persona. ^^ 💕
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💕 @impish-ivy 💕
Another face I occasionally see pop up on my nonfictions, thank you so much for interacting with my posts! I’m not sure if you would like Minnie to be turned into a markable plushie or if you perhaps have a persona, but do let me know. ☺️💕
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💕 @undertalefanzz-blog 💕
I honestly got no comment to you, if you know you know. 😘
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💕 @venusdaplanet 💕
I don’t see you too often but when I do, I absolutely love seeing your comments, very interesting to read and makes you stand out in the crowd. If you got a persona or an OC I can draw up into a markable plushie let me know, I’ll be happy to draw one up for my application to you! 🥰💕
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boqvistsbabe · 2 months
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Update!!!!!!!!
Hey Y’all!!
Here is the start of hopefully monthly updates. I know in my last update I said I was going to be more consistently here and active. Obviously, that didn’t happen lol. Trying to hold myself to that rn. So this is probably going to be the format for all of my update posts, just so they are easier to follow.
Refresh:
So I am almost completely done with the blog refresh. I think all that is left is updating links and getting some other posts (ex: theme days) made/redone. Most of that got put on the back burner due to how long they were going to take lol. But hopefully, over Spring Break, I’ll be able to get those done (no promises, another thing I’m trying to do, is be more realistic about what I want to get done by when so). 
Writing/Other Content:
Ik I said I’d write more. Once again didn’t really happen. Well, I have written a decent bit, but never finished anything. There is one fic that I am going to try and work on after this week (midterms lol) and have someone look over it (the first time I’ve had a beta reader, look at me go lol). Like the blog as a whole, I am trying to organize my writing, like requests and my ideas and what is going out when etc. (@ any of the other writers if you have any suggestions of what to/where to organize my stuff so it doesn’t get all confusing and mixed up you should def let me know). Speaking of requests, I am going to try and do at least two requests a month. That doesn’t sound like a lot but for me, that feels like something I can realistically do. I will be doing old requests first because even though they are years old at this point, I liked the ideas so I genuinely want to write them. I am still going to be accepting new requests (esp because sometimes that helps spark creativity/help with writer’s block so feel free to send in any ideas!!) but I will try to get those older ones done first. As for any other content (playlists, moodboards, IG edits, drawings, etc.) I am also taking requests for those so feel free to send in any of those requests too. 
Another Blog?!
As of rn the second hockey blog has not been “released”. I want to catch up on things for this blog before I throw that into the mix and try to grow that as well. I am hoping to add that sometime this summer. Also, I do technically have a sideblog already (@samistheman) which is normally where I reblog random things, and I don’t really have tags for that blog I just kinda willy-nilly reblog there (it used to be mostly PJO stuff but now that’s kind of here because of how much of it there is lol).
Life Update:
College is a lot rn. I’m doing 17 credit hours and tbh do not know what possessed me to do that. At first, I was doing pretty good, but now not so much. Like I said earlier I have midterms this week. If y’all didn’t know this, I’m shit at taking tests so not doing great rn. Thankfully one of my classes ends on Sunday so at least I don’t have to worry about that. I’ve had a lot going on in my personal life recently that is impacting a lot so trying to navigate that as well. I am moving out in May, which is yes months from now but there is still a lot that I need to do beforehand. Anyway, I’m going to a college hockey game on Thursday and I am super excited. I haven’t been able to go to a game since October. Also little fun update, I’m going on a weekend (work) trip to Boston. Super excited for that. I’ll be getting to go to a Celtics game and a Red Sox game (I’m a Royals girlie tho). I’ve never been to an NBA game so that’s for sure gonna be really cool. I’ve been to many MLB games before but this will be my first at a different stadium. Anyway, I think that is it for this update. Hope y’all are doing well!!
As usual, if y’all ever want to talk dms/inbox are open <3
I am going to tag some moots, I am totally forgetting some people so I am sorry for that (if y'all could reblog that would be amazing)
@2manytabsopen @krugstrash @jimmystrudel @andreburakozy @sidneycrosbyhoe @fallinallincurls @timstuetzle @typical-simplelove @ilyasorokinn @drei-mrssvechii
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currywaifu · 4 years
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𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: a waltz to remember 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩: tsukioka tsumugi/reader 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: sfw 𝐰𝐜: 3.1k words
𝐚𝐧: I really liked this idea, so much that I got excited and wrote a lot of plot and lead-up to the floof oops. I might have made some errors w/ my waltz descriptions, it’s been a few years
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“A modern, theatrical take on Swan Lake… hmm, wouldn’t that fit someone from the Spring troupe more?”
Izumi pouted, “I already asked! None of them are free to be a guest actor, you’re my only hope Tsumugi!”
Tsumugi considered the director’s offer. Truth be told, he wasn’t that familiar with the original ballet nor did he know what to expect out of a modern retelling, but it was always good to get experience in different genres and modes. He currently wasn’t expected to be in any Mankai Company plays either, so as long as he organized his tutoring schedule he should be fine.
Turning back to the director he nodded. “I’ll be taking the role then, director.”
Clapping her hands together, Izumi grinned excitedly. “I’ll make sure to tell their director! Ah, hold on, I haven’t told you what your role will be yet, oops.”
Sensing it, he immediately shook off the upcoming apology. “It’s fine, it’s my fault for not asking either. I didn’t agree to a weird role or anything, right?”
Shaking her head, the brunette looked at her phone. “It says here you’ll be playing the role of Wolfgang, Prince Siegfried’s tutor.”
A tutor? With a laugh, Tsumugi thought how fitting it must be for him to take this role. He doesn’t know much about the tutor’s personality, but at the very least he’s ready to deliver any teacher or educator type of action need be.
Though the feeling was nothing new with every new role he took, he found himself buzzing with excitement for the future practices to come.
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“Thank you for taking up the role, Tsukioka-san,” the troupe president said, shaking his hand, “it’s a bit last minute, but Tachibana-san was kind enough to help me look for a guest actor.”
“Thank you for having me as well,” Tsumugi replied, “I read through the script and I can’t wait to become Wolfgang onstage.”
In the ballet, the tutor gets drunk on wine during Prince Siegfried’s birthday celebration. Eden Troupe’s playwright decided to transform that character, now nicknamed Wolfie, into a normally well-mannered tutor who has passionate rants about history when drunk.
Izumi and Tasuku had laughed when he told them. It was rare to have Tasuku laugh out loud, but they were also at a bar so that might have something to do with it.
“Eh? This role should be easy for you then! I was right to give it to you!” The director exclaimed, clapping him on the back with a lot more strength he thought possible from her.
His best friend shook his head in disbelief, “not too far off from the truth then, based on how the three of us are like when we drink.”
While the role itself was new, there was a sense of familiarity to it that made it easier for Tsumugi to slip into character. The lines themselves rolled off with ease from his tongue, and with guidance he trusted himself enough to embody the mannerisms of the character.
There was only one problem.
He watches you get up from your seat in the audience and head up the stage, your back turned to the chairs to face him and his fellow actors. You walked with such confidence that it was hard not to be captivated by your presence.
“Looks like I’m back again,” with a broad and charming grin several members of the troupe cheered loudly, while the newer and quieter members clapped politely.
“I see some new faces, welcome!”, you greeted everyone, telling them your name, “and I’ll be your choreographer!”
Dance. They had to dance and unfortunately for him and the poor souls that have to partner up with him, Tsumugi has two left feet.
The last time he was required to dance was probably way back in high school for a school play production, and no way did dancing to Seussical the Musical qualify as recent or relevant experience.
You threw a glance at him, noting his worried gaze, and tried to indirectly reassure him and the rest of the actors.
“I’m not a strict coach nor do I expect perfection right away, but what’s important is that you constantly put your best efforts. Understood?”
The actors all replied in chorus, and Tsumugi tried to reassure himself. At least it wasn’t some high energy, action-filled choreography or an overly technical dance. A waltz, he can do that much.
“Alright, let’s do some stretches first!”
“Ah! I’m sorry,” he’s been apologizing for a couple minutes now, and while he tried to keep it discreet between him and his dance partner it didn’t go unnoticed, at least by you.
You’ve been paying special attention to the man with dark blue hair for a while now. At first, you merely observing the unfamiliar faces, new additions to the troupe and guest actors, but something about him struck you as special.
When you watched him during rehearsal an hour ago, you had wondered if the president picked up a new talent. He was able to pull off the tutor’s initial modesty through his subtle acting, and in his silent acquiescence of a glass of wine, he switched into Wolfie, the talkative drunk who was incredibly passionate about history.
“Where’d you pick him up, prez? He’s obviously no rookie,” you asked the blond beside you, who simply chuckled.
“That’s Tsukioka Tsumugi, he belongs to Mankai Company actually,” he explained, “it’s his first rehearsal today. He seemed a bit anxious at first, but he’s doing really well.”
“Mankai? Should DM Izumi later to reserve a ticket for their next prod,” you murmured, quietly watching the rest of the rehearsal.
He didn’t show any signs of frustration, and he was obviously listening attentively when you did the demonstration, so was it a matter of a lack of practice?
Well, you were gonna find out.
Tsumugi had an idea of what was to come when you called him after rehearsals concluded.
“Tsumugi-kun, sorry for calling you all of a sudden,” you apologized with a bow, to which the actor returned.
“Not at all, I probably looked like a newborn fawn out there,” well, that much you couldn’t deny, however, you didn’t like that he was putting himself down after his first time. There have been a lot worse than him, whether it be talent or attitude or otherwise.
“It’s your first rehearsal, don’t be so hard on yourself,” you paused for a moment, closing your eyes.
Well, you didn’t plan on reaching out this much to help him, but somehow you couldn’t help yourself.
“Tsumugi-kun, would you like to have extra practice sessions with me?” Hmm… The wording seemed a little better in your head, but it seemed to get the message across.
He was hesitant to accept, “I wouldn’t want to be a bother.”
“Trust me,” you clasped his hands between yours, missing the pink dotting his cheeks as you looked at him with determination in your eyes, “by the time you’re done with me you’d be able to waltz even with your eyes closed.”
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“You really told him that? You made it sound like you were talking about a different kind of one-on-one~” Eden Troupe’s director let out a blaring cackle, slamming his beer glass down the bar table.
“Wahh, so naughty uwu ♡~ who knew our ☆ dancing diva ☆ was so forward~~” the troupe’s playwright said, rubbing his shoulders against yours, “why can’t you be like that with ♡ me ♡ wink wink oOF-“ a slight kick to his legs halted wherever that conversation was going to go.
Your head was beginning to hurt, and you didn’t know if it was from the alcohol or whatever the hell you were all talking about. You could even hear the hearts and stars, how was that possible?
“Argh, unlike you perverts I’m sure he understood what I meant from the get-go,” you groaned, briefly swishing the liquid in your glass before downing it in one go. You’d probably end up with a hangover tomorrow but so be it if you could survive tonight without getting charged for homicide. Or maybe even double homicide.
“He’s not an angel, even if he does look like one~”
“Tsumugi-kun is one compared to the two of you. Do your troupe members know that behind closed curtains y’all share one brain cell?” You retorted, completely ignoring the latter comment because yeah, he did look like an angel, what’s there to it? So what if he radiated such a gentle light around him?
“I’m just saying, he’s your fucking type,” the troupe’s director pointed out, the man beside him nodding fervently.
“And I’m a fucking professional,” you insisted, not even an ounce of denial towards his statement.
Raising his hands, the playwright put on his most nonchalant look, a very difficult feat for a drunk person, “oya oya, who can say if y’all decide to bow-chicka-wow-wow, hohoho ☆~”
Calling the bartender for another drink, you came to the realization that you needed better friends.
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Two days after the bar night out and your raging hangover the morning come, you could still feel a migraine coming at the thought of your two friends. Honestly? Fuck them for making you realize that Tsumugi was extremely cute and 200% your type, that wasn’t very fair of them- or HIM for that matter!
Is it even legal to be so cute? The two of you exchanged details on the optimal practice time, and even his texting style was cute! Who knew he’d be so polite even in text? Bless him.
You were going to meet up with Tsumugi at the Mankai Company Theatre, apparently, rehearsals would end earlier tonight so the two of you had the stage for yourselves. You looked around outside for a bit before a familiar face with dark blue hair opened the doors to greet you.
“Thank you for taking the time to teach me,” he said, “I was able to practice the steps on my own, but I just get lost with a partner.”
Oh, if that was the case you have a good idea of what his issue is.
“It’s no problem, Tsumugi-kun. Let’s review the individual steps first before we continue.”
Feet, hip-distance apart. Step the left foot forward, then the right follows. The left meets the right foot. The right steps back and the left follows. Place the right foot next to the left.
A full box step.
Tsumugi was right, he was able to get the basic steps of a waltz down to a tee. That must mean…
“Alright, now try those same steps while leading me as your partner.”
He let out a breath to prepare himself, before standing in front of you. The distance was far too much, and you ushered him to come closer, “shoulder distance, Tsumugi-kun.”
“Right, sorry,” he walked forward a bit more, awkwardly mirroring your actions, extending his arms forward.
“You’re the lead, and I’m the follow, so place your right hand below my left shoulder blade,” you waited for him to do as you said before continued with your instructions, “and our hands go like this.”
You wrapped your right hand around his left, and was it just the stage lights or were his cheeks dotted with pink? Well, now wasn’t the time to tease him.
Tsumugi’s difficulty stemmed either from being too tense around his partner or from being too afraid to take the lead. Whichever one it was, you were going to crush it as hard as you were crushing on Tsumugi.
“You know, I find it pretty funny,” you began, hoping to ease up his tension by lightening the mood, “that you’re supposed to be playing a tutor, yet I’m tutoring the tutor.”
His left foot forward, your right foot back.
He laughed, amusement visible in his features. “I actually work as a tutor, too, so it’s just as funny to me.”
His right foot forward, parallel to the left. Your left foot back, parallel to the right.
“Eh? No wonder it looked so natural! Ah, although you’d probably be good in other roles too? What other roles have you done?”
His left foot meets his right, and your right meets your left.
So far, so good.
“My first role for Mankai was an angel in love with a human,” Tsumugi said, becoming more immersed into the conversation, “though I’ve done a bunch of roles when I attended school.”
He steps back with his right foot, and you step your left foot forward.
“I’ve never actually acted, but I’ve always been interested in theatre. I’m always helping productions,” you replied, “an angel? It’s the perfect role for you.”
His left foot steps forward, and unfortunately steps on your right foot.
“Ow, a little too early, Tsumugi-kun,” you wince slightly at the added pressure, and Tsumugi hastily steps back looking extremely apologetic.
“Sorry! I lost track of what the next step was,” he explained, “can we go back to the start?”
You smiled, at least he looked like he was raring to try again. Without a word, you signaled him to begin at starting position once more, your hands linking together.
One, two, three. One, two, three.
“Were you caught off-guard by what I said?” You asked, his grip on your hand slacking slightly before fixing it, “sorry, I just said what was on my mind.”
“It’s fine! You just surprised me a bit.”
Forward, side, close, back, side, close, forward, side, close, back, side, close.
“It’s just the two of us, Tsumugi-kun, so don’t be afraid to make mistakes, okay?” you locked eyes with him, waiting for him to respond.
“Thank you.”
“See? We were able to do a waltz box step together! If you’re free Thursday, I’ll help you fix the underarm turns!” Your smile was bright, radiant and blinding, all directed at him. Suddenly his face felt warm all over.
He was quick to arrange the next session.
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“You know, if you’re supposed to act drunk, it wouldn’t matter if you stepped on your partner’s toes here and then,” Tasuku said off-handedly.
Tsumugi didn’t reply immediately. Eden troupe’s director had actually told him after their latest practice that it didn’t matter if he made a mistake every now again as long as it wasn’t too exaggerated.
He hesitated a bit before responding, “that’s true, but it’d be nice to get a whole sequence right without stepping on someone’s feet.”
It wasn’t a lie, but he was still relieved Tasuku looked like he accepted that answer, “would be nice to have that skill stored just in case.”
Even so, you looked so delighted when he did well. If just for a little while longer, he’d like to see you direct a smile at him again.
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You were really, really grateful to see Tsumugi again. It was always a pleasure meeting up with him, dancing with him, learning something new about him.
Despite all of this, your toes could only take so much pressure in one session.
“Somehow, this is kind of embarrassing,” Tsumugi said as he stepped on your feet for the umpteenth time tonight.
Unable to resist the urge to tease him, you replied, “huh, you’re really tripping all over your feet for me, angel~”
You felt a little bit guilty when you saw his cheeks kissed pink like a carnation because no matter how cute he was when flustered, you didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. Your lips parted to apologize, but you found yourself befuddled by how he remained silent.
One, two, three. One, two, three.
He was quiet, merely staring at you until he moved to turn you around, letting go of the arm beneath your shoulder. The two of you were facing each other once again when he finally said anything.
One, two, three. One, two-
“You’re the one who’s the angel here.”
You stepped forward, accidentally stepping on his feet. The two of you were caught off-guard, you more so by his response than the fact that you made a mistake. As you stumbled forward, he circled his arms around you to serve as an attempt to steady you.
Tsumugi looked at you worriedly. He meant it as a compliment! You let him off easy every time he made mistakes while simultaneously helping him improve, plus giving him praise every time he did something right. Like a guardian angel of sorts? Or the angel over the shoulder?
His thoughts get interrupted when he hears you mutter something with a semblance of his name.
“Tsumugi-kun,” the said man watched in awe as you widen your eyes, a flush creeping across your cheeks like a vine of scarlet honeysuckle, or a freshly bloomed rose bush or a myriad of other flowers he could associate with you right now but one thing was certain.
This was different than the admiration he felt for you and what you do when you would dance with him, in front of the other actors. This was different than the appreciation he felt when you gave him words of encouragement. This was different from the pang in his chest when you teased him lightly.
No, not different.
It was an amalgamation of all of those things and more.
Tsumugi knows a crush when he sees it; when he feels it. This was a full-blown crush.
He knew from the rush of endearment he felt when you stepped back slightly from his grasp, your hands fanning your face wildly. He knew from the way you shifted your eyes around the room, avoided locking eyes with him and yet giving him millisecond glimpses to search for a reaction.
There certainly was a better way of saying this, of doing this. Maybe after he’s returned back to the dorm he could mull over his feelings and think of a better way to confess, maybe bring you to one of his favorite coffee shops, maybe even ask Tasuku and Izumi for advice…
but he wants to let at least a fraction of his feelings out, to relieve him if not for reassurance. He allows himself to be a little hopeful, a little confident that your feelings resemble his if he was to base it off of your reaction.
“Even after our lessons end, could we continue seeing each other?”
For the first time in what felt like hours, which in reality was likely three minutes, your gaze met his own. You’d think about it more later, but his pupils were dilated as he looked at you. Yours might have been, too.
“I’d like that, a lot.”
Tsumugi didn’t step on your feet for the rest of the night.
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want to order again?
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hahanoiwont · 5 years
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so in my dnd campaign we’re doing puzzle rooms. and one of them in particular was my absolute favorite puzzle of this arc, and maybe ever. I think it was just so clever and it gave us a lot of fun character development, so let me tell u all about that.
The party entered a plain, empty room with a big mirror in the center. In the mirror, we could see a pedestal reflected. In the real room, no pedestal. So that’s probably our goal.
Also in the mirror, every party member was reflected, recognizable but grotesque. Each was a monster in ways that corresponded to their character traits/flaws--except pizza bard. pizza bard was reflected in the mirror exactly as himself.
(I’m like 80% sure this is because pizza bard is a fae, so the “monster” version of him is actually just himself. technically fae are monsters. but the party doesn’t know about any of that in-character, and pizza bard refused to comment on any difference between his reflection and the others’.)
Every time we tried to enter the mirror world to get to the pedestal reflected in it, our monster selves would mirror our movements and block us. They would match us just like a normal reflection, except that they could be affected by spells and abilities. So our fighter knocked all the monster selves prone with an effect, and pizza bard’s first reaction was to reach through the mirror and offer his other self a hand up. mirror!pizza bard accepted, and disappeared into a cloud of smoke that soon joined with real!pizza bard. He was free to pass through.
No one could figure it out for a while, but eventually each other party member found their own way in--the rogue snuck in so well that her monster self couldn’t find her, the fighter offered himself a beer, the artificer just asked to be let in, and so on. We knew that each party member had to do something unique to them to get in, but even after everyone got in, we couldn’t figure out what the rule was.
Our DM decided to Word Of God it, since we’ve already solved the puzzle--each party member had to get rid of their double in the way that they’re most likely to die. The rogue had to lose herself, the fighter went for alcohol (violence would have also worked, he’s a pirate), the artificer was literally asking for it, etc.
pizza bard’s solution was kindness. He got in a good 10 minutes before everyone else because his first instinct was also the answer to his puzzle. And as each party member came through, we learned something more about them, or we got to see a snapshot of who they are as a person.
Even two years into our campaign, we’re having a lot of fun with character development, and bringing our characters closer together. This puzzle was perfect for this group, because it nicely complemented our mostly-social playstyle by letting us capitalize on our characters’ uniqueness as the only solution to getting us all across. I just really liked this puzzle, y’all.
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bobbystompy · 7 years
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My Top 132 Songs Of 2016
Previously: 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011
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Haven’t started writing this yet, but after peaking at 73 songs in 2013, then dipping to 67 and 71 the last two years, it is unbelievable we hit 132 (blame Spotify’s easy ability to save music and create playlists).
I debated skipping around, but nahhh, let’s get it.
As always, the criteria/info:
This is a list of songs I personally like, not ones I’m saying are the “best” from the year; more subjective than objective
No artist is featured more than once
If it comes down to choosing between two songs for an artist, I try to give more weight to a single or featured track; it’s not the ultimate factor, but it typically makes sharing the music easier
Speaking of... each song on the list is linked in the title if you wanna check out some for yourself
BOBBY VS. THE SONGS, FID
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132) Kendrick Lamar - “untitled 07 | levitate”
Yeah, not gonna do the thing everyone else is doing where we pretend Kendrick is making amazing music with 2016′s throwaway release. I had to trudge through so much weird-and-not-fun stuff on “Butterfly” last year; it’s time to be done with it. Kendrick is obviously a top flight MC and could end up as an all-time great, but, like, come on -- this is from an EP of b-sides, it’s (probably) the best song... and it’s still not that memorable. How this record is ended up on so many year end best of lists mystified me.
131) Young Thug - “Drippin'”
Thugger spazzin’ around.
130) 2 Chainz f/ Lil Wayne - “Gotta Lotta”
Eh, this song’s aight; beat good, kinda sticks with you sometimes. Funny it should be listed as “2 Chainz & Lil Wayne” -- peep the very creative album art -- yet ended up as a 2 Chainz solo feature (on technicality alone) due to Weezy’s ongoing label issues. These two play off each other well.
129) Real Friends - “Mokena”
This song is good, but it’s... a little too angst-y at points.
128) Iggy Pop - “American Valhalla”
The best compliment I can give this song is it sounds unlike anything I’ve ever heard. Not a fun listen every time, but if you consciously immerse, it can definitely work.
127) The Avett Brothers - “Ain't No Man”
Good mom song; feels like fun. passed the torch with this one.
126) Paul Simon - “Horace And Pete”
Louis C.K. got Simon to write a theme song for his dramedy “Horace and Pete”, and the diminutive one came through in spades. I sometimes like to shoehorn in the f-word when singing along to help break up some of the seriousness. But yeah, this feels like a ‘60s classic even though it’s essentially brand new.
125) Frank Ocean - “Nikes”
The A.V. Club summed up my opinion of the Frank Ocean record with one swift line: “On first listen, Blonde feels like a Cracker Jack box with no toy in it.”
Amen.
Don’t get it twisted: I love Frank, still believe in Frank, and of course consider “channel ORANGE” to (objectively) be one of the greatest albums of this generation, but “Blonde”? It didn’t connect. Somewhat reluctantly, I picked this song for the list because it was the first one I heard, and it stands as a symbol of the initial hope which faded over a few listens. But when Ocean breaks in after all the high pitched singing, it does feel like a moment.
Also, this line will always stick: “RIP Pimp C / RIP Trayvon, that n**** look just like me”.
124) DJ Khaled f/ Jay-Z & Future - “I Got The Keys”
DJ Khaled is a talentless jackass, annoyingly ad libbing his way into our brains. Unfortunately, my personal favorite artist chooses to make listenable songs with him. Alas, No. 124. Jay slaying with “My wife Beyoncé, I brag different”. Future... being Future.
123) Slim Thug - “King”
The always underrated Slim Thug, hangin’ out and tellin’ you about his life. Also lifting weights. Minus points for using the Pimp C sample Jigga used in “FuckWithMeYouKnowIGotIt” only three years ago.
122) American Football - “Give Me The Gun”
This band will never hit for me as much as it does with cool/laid back guitar people, but I enjoyed this tune. And I wish my friend Luke were here to listen with me.
121) Craig Finn - “Screenwriters School”
Craig Finn, as slow and chill as you’ll ever hear him.
120) Mikey Erg - “1001 Smashed Motel Rooms”
Solid verses, big chorus, and you can almost, like, tell he’s bald by the voice (not an insult).
119) Cassadee Pope - “Summer”
The former Hey Monday singer goes in on the strongest season.
118) The Cool Kids - “Connect 4″
It’s very difficult to write about The Cool Kids without using the word “cool”, but man, these guys have such a great interplay. It’s not two separate dudes taking turns; it’s a glorious intertwine with true chemistry.
117) Third Eye Blind - “Cop vs. Phone Girl"
This is our first song I’d call an imperative listen. I say this because you need you to hear Stephan Jenkins sing “Why's it so hard to say ‘Black Lives Matter’? / Doesn't mean that you're anti-white / Take it from me, I'm super fucking white”.
He remains bulletproof.
116) Wakrat - “Sober Addiction”
I was positive this song was a jam after one listen, but I’ve listened 3-4 times since, and it’s gotten progressively worse each time. If that’s not enough of a hook, the singer is the Rage Against The Machine bassist.
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115) Owl Meet Rabbit - “This Side Of The Nut House”
A Christmas song with a “National Lampoon” reference.
114) YG f/ Drake & Kamaiyah - “Why You Always Hatin?”
Still a little unclear why Drake keeps agreeing to be in YG songs. His verse references sliding into DMs.
113) Yo Gotti f/ Nicki Minaj - “Down In The DM (Remix)”
...and we also have a track titled after it. My biggest memory with this song will be feeling sick in an Uber from Chicago to Forest Park on, like, a weekday morning but still mustering the nerve to laugh at the chorus, which is egregious enough before the “bridge” of “Snapchat me that pussy, if it’s cool”. Seriously. RIP, music.
112) The Dirty Nil - “Zombie Eyed”
This rips.
111) Microwave - “Homebody”
A good song that pulls you in further when the distortion gets bigger in the chorus.
110) AJJ - “Terrifyer”
Some days, you're a member of Queen Other days, you're a Kottonmouth King Some days, you're Emilio Estevez Other days, you're Charlie Sheen
109) Band of Horses - “Casual Party”
These guys are all smooth harmonies.
108) Fitz and the Tantrums - “HandClap”
This song is pretty unoffensive, but it’s catchy enough to work.
107) Nothing - “The Dead Are Dumb”
“The Dead Are Dumb” -or- if the “Twin Peaks” theme actually went somewhere.
106) Car Seat Headrest - “Unforgiving Girl (She's Not An)”
This band kinda reminds me of The Strokes; just a liiiiiitle less New York street and a tad more indie.
105) Vince Staples f/ Kilo Kish - “Loco”
Vince got into the news this year after defending the mom who had an extreme distaste for his lyrics in 2015′s “Norf Norf”. Let’s just say she also would not enjoy this one. His interplay with Kilo is on point.
104) GTA f/ Vince Staples - “Little Bit of This”
‘ey, it’s Vince again, and this one is stronger; somehow topping the high energy of “Loco” with another level of fire-spitting.
103) The Living End - “Monkey”
The Aussies broke a 13 year album hiatus with 2016′s “Shift”, and “Monkey”, one of the lead singles, did not disappoint. There will always be a place for songwriting like this.
102) Vic Mensa - “16 Shots”
This song is so raw and street and real. Sometimes you hear something, and it just cuts like a knife. I’m talking a “Straight Outta Compton” level here. Mensa has thoughts on police brutality in Chicago, and he ain’t holding back. He played this live on Kimmel, and his solemn-yet-wired energy could not be ignored.
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101) Boyd & The Stahfools - “Summerly”
Some might say BATS sold out with this very commercial ode to Pollyanna’s raspberry wheat ale, but when you consume as much of it as those boys do, I say it’s legit art.
100) Macklemore & RL f/ J. Woods - “White Privelege II”
This is kinda like the Third Eye Blind message on Black Lives Matter, only the exact opposite. It’s... quite heavy handed, and while I like that from Macklemore, I realize a lot do not. All I can say in his defense is, like, man, it really seems like this dude is trying, and he certainly attempted to involve the right people. If that’s not good enough for you, I get it.
(Plus, he kinda digs on Iggy; throwing y’all a bone, just take it.)
99) Conor Oberst - “A Little Uncanny”
Oberst sounds a ton like Bob Dylan in this one, but he also sounds a ton like Oberst. It’s kinda like two massive folk tidal waves crashing into each other.
98) Cymbals Eat Guitars - “Have A Heart”
CEG -- despite a terrific name -- have always made music that felt obtuse, but this is the first song that felt ready-made to, like, give normal people a window to check out the band.
97) Green Day- “Bang Bang”
Everyone wants to over-analyze Green Day. But if you don’t do that, you’ll enjoy this as a fast and easy pop-punk song. It plays at my gym sometimes, and I always kinda assume people are annoyed by it. To quote Josh from “Heavyweights”, this pleases me.
96) James Vincent McMorrow - “Get Low”
Chill/cool.
95) The Flatliners - “Hang My Head”
This won’t end up in their all-time Top 5, but it’s a good song, and it was nice to hear from this band in 2016.
94) AFI - “Snow Cats”
This would sound right at home as a mid-tempo number on “Sing The Sorrow”.
93) Jay Electronica - “#TBE The Curse Of Mayweather”
Oof, what a shitty title. So, this is Jay Elect’s “blast back” at Kendrick Lamar after K-Dot slaughtered the rap game (and shit, maybe rap itself) in 2013′s “Control”. But here’s the thing... “Control” was “Control”. No one is topping “Control”. No one is successfully going at “Control”. That’s in its own stratosphere. Was it fun to see the enigmatic MC try? Sure. Did it make any type of impact? Eh, no. But I did enjoy the fake Kendrick voice.
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92) The Dyes - “Loudmouth”
Out of every song so far, I’ve found this the toughest to write about. My favorite part is probably the way the guitar and bass play off each other, but my second favorite part has to be how sinister and swaggery it sounds.
91) Big Sean - “Get My Shit Together”
Maaaan, I missed Big Sean in 2016 after an extremely fruitful 2015. The few times he did surface -- on other people’s songs -- he stayed in form, so you’ll see more of him as this goes.
It feel like young Ray Allen with the white twins
90) Emeli Sandé f/ Jay Electronica & Áine Zion - “Garden”
Serene, with a fitting Jay Elect verse.
89) Yumi Zouma - “Haji Awali”
Chiller than a Coleman.
88) Jimmy Eat World - “Get Right”
We’ve talked about this before, but JEW typically have sunny day feel good songs, or nighttime darkness-type songs; this one’s the latter.
87) Into It. Over It. - “No EQ”
Sooooo good; melodic and percussive and soulful. It tugs at your heart just the right amount.
86) The Front Bottoms - “Joanie”
This really, really sounds like a Front Bottoms song, which I mostly mean as a compliment but also... am slightly worried about as it pertains to future material.
85) The Lumineers - “Ophelia”
Would I like to steal this song and give it to a girl and say I wrote it to mega impress her? Uh, duh. Piano for dayz.
84) Viola Beach - “Swings & Waterslides”
Kinda a lighter version of the Arctic Monkeys; mostly the singing... but in a big way.
83) The Game - “92 Bars”
It’s sposta be a Meek Mill diss, but it’s basically Game freestyling about a buncha stuff over a workable beat. Some real solid lines, too. My favorites:
- “I can kill you in four bars, that's a Kit Kat”
- “Let me tell you who suck, like banana Now and Laters” (haha)
- “Give me Left Eye back, take Fetty Wap and the Raiders”
- “Gum by them Yeezys, I'm the 6'5" Eazy” (MVP bar?)
- “This the Golden State and my shooters ain't on no hoop shit” (coooold)
82) OMI - “Hula Hoop”
I’mma give the write up here to my girl Alyssa Pawola, via her husband, Jeff Pawola (who watched the video after she was told the song reminded me of him):
She agreed with you!
She says it's because the singer dances similar to me and is a little goofy (compliment?), whereas all the girls around him are really good dancers (thus, her).
81) Joey Purp f/ Chance The Rapper - “Girls @”
If you’re not all-in on this song by the seven or eight second mark, then you can probably pass. HOWEVA, Chance and his 3 hat appear later on, so we call that incentive, young Bucky.
80) Vinnie Caruana - “I Don’t Believe You”
The feels like a last-song-on-the-record kinda track.
/looks up if it was the last song on the record
...8 of 10!
(Close enough.)
79) No Lenox - “Leave”
This song is heart and blood, with a rare use of “fucking” from Chris Trott.
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78) JANK - “Versace Summer”
JANK is interesting. All of their artwork and motif make them seem like stoners (and maybe they are), but the music itself is so technical and synced. Like, you know they’re trying and very capable. So as weird as seeing “Versace” next to “JANK” might look, maybe it’s this high end brand that truly does fit their sound over, say, Faygo. But yeah, by the time this song is done, even though they’ve played the chorus a handful of times, you probably wouldn’t mind a handful more.
77) White Lung - “Dead Weight”
This band is just the coolest shit. They always go so, so hard, but this time, there’s a guitar playing mega bad ass leads to help even things out. I would believe you if you told me the guitar was also shooting lasers.
76) Descendents - “Without Love”
Like The Living End, the Descendents have also been out of the ‘releasing new records’ game for over a decade. And as jokey of a band as they’ve been in the past, this song has some of the same earnestness and vulnerability we heard on 2004′s “Cool To Be You”.
75) Andrew Bird - “Roma Fade”
For sure a candidate for coolest song title of 2016.
74) LVL UP - “Hidden Driver”
This is too indie for its own good.
73) A$AP Ferg f/ Big Sean - “World Is Mine”
Mostly included for Sean. Sorry, Ferg -- but you did give him the hook and a verse.
72) AM Taxi - “Enough To Feel Like Enough”
Like The Front Bottoms song from earlier, this AM Taxi song is very AM Taxi. But I ain’t ever worried about AM Taxi.
71) Rozwell Kid - “Baby’s First Sideburns”
Not sure I’ve ever heard a weak song by this band.
70) PARTYNEXTDOOR f/ Drake - “Come And See Me”
If you wanted to upset your love interest in 2016, hitting him or her with the “I hear you talkin' 'bout ‘we’ a lot, oh, you speak French now?” line was probably a good place to start.
69) Tancred - “Bed Case”
Kinda ‘90s, right? Nice.
68) Thrice - “Blood On The Sand”
Moderate take alert: I purport the Thrice singer sounds like Dave Grohl in this song, particularly during the chorus. Come at me with your agrees or disagrees.
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67) MakeWar - “Ode”
The dude on this band’s album cover always reminds me of Rafa Nadal, which is weird, as I’d argue he looks -20% like Rafa Nadal. This song has a downcast energy. I think I wanna see these dudes live.
66) PKEW PKEW PKEW - “Asshole Pandemic”
Party punk, wooooo. You will not find a more circular 2016 lyric than “Why’s this fuckin’ dick gotta be such a cock?”
65) Adam Friedman f/ Mike Posner - “Lemonade”
blue eyes >>> brown eyes, Adam.
64) Matt and Kim - “Let’s Run Away”
As always-always-always, Matt and Kim are having more fun than we are.
63) Ariana Grande f/ Nicki Minaj - “Side To Side”
As recently as 40 days ago, I was emaling my friends about this track with the very loaded “I’m not sure this song is good at all”.
My buddy Brian’s response will probably jar you like it jarred me:
Gotta say, I have a soft spot for this song. I think the beat is pretty banging and the subject matter is a plus. Like, we do have to acknowledge that she's walking side to side because she's been having sex with dude all night and day and now her vagina is too sore to walk like a regular person. I can dig that.
Well then.
62) With You. f/ Vince Staples - “Ghost”
Weird music video, but definitely my favorite version of Vince that we got in 2016.
61) Fifth Harmony f/ Ty Dolla $ign - “Work From Home”
I was listening to this song with my girlfriend the other day, and I said something like “This song could really use a rap cameo”. Enter: the very forgettable Ty Dolla $ign. Still, a fun, sexty song. Also, I believe this is our first -- and only? -- song to have over one billion YouTube views (!!!).
60) Masked Intruder - “If Only”
This made it over other MI candidates due to the Winnie Cooper reference.
59) Fat Joe, Remy Ma, Jay-Z f/ French Montana & Infared - “All The Way Up (Remix)”
An easy chorus for sports teams to co-opt, as well as a “fuck off me” Jay verse. He bucks “Lemonade”, ups his products for the infinite time, and drops the mic after:
The OG's say, "Hov, how high is high enough?" I said "'till we eye and eye with the higher ups" Until we let 'em know, we ain't those n****s Until our baby's showered in gold, n**** Blue looking like Pac in the tub David LaChapelle levels of not giving a fuck Prince left his masters where they safe and sound We never gonna let the elevator take him down
Man.
Worry not, cockroach French is around to muck things up. It’s salvaged by a real dope Remy Ma verse, though.
58) Al Scorch - “Everybody Out”
The perfect soundtrack for escaping a busted speakeasy.
57) Tegan and Sara - “Dying To Know”
This song makes the list because the “Boyfriend” chorus was lazy as hell; it was like the “Closer” chorus, version 2.0. Conversely, “Dying To Know” has real emotion and a big, legit chorus.
56) Bloc Party - “The Good News”
A song I fear no one will like but me... but hey, my list.
55) New Lenox - “It’s Its Own Thing”
This is a song I wrote (and drummed on) about how winter sucks. It’s also about Chicago, being alone, finding someone, and using Banner Pilot to get through tough, frozen times. Shout out to Dave Rokos for singing the majority of the leads and Chris Trott for producing.
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54) Julien Baker - “Photobooth”
I became enamored with the voice and talent of 21-year-old phenom Julien Baker throughout 2016, and though she released her debut album in 2015 (ALL TRACKS DISQUALIFIED, CHICA), she did drop this Death Cab cover for The A.V. Club this year, so I found a way to get her in the door. Now that we’re all here, I’ll give the floor to Deadspin’s Tom Ley:
What I did not expect was to like this version of the song so much that I now become visibly disgusted when I try to go back and listen to the original. Like all the good, thoughtful teens of my era, I spent a lot of time listening to Death Cab in my car, and I used to nod along pleasantly when “Photobooth” came on. But now I’m just angry I ever wasted any time listening to a lesser version of the song. In my opinion, Death Cab should just turn their entire catalog over to Julien Baker and be done with it.
Ironically, I will be seeing Baker open up for Death Cab singer Ben Gibbard later this January.
53) Desiigner - “Panda”
This is a bad song... but it’s incredibly listenable (for about 30 seconds, only it keeps going for a normal amount of time). It got upped on Kanye’s album, which likely sparked public interest in this mumble rap disaster. Literally the best thing you can say is it’s a Future rip off -- and he’s not all that great to begin with.
/sadly looks up YouTube view total
190 million; Fifth Harmony is like “pshhhh”.
Yet, “Panda” somehow endures. It feels fresh, saying “panda” repatedly never seems to tire, and it burned down the dance floor at Brian Pawola’s wedding this summer; old and young alike wanted to be pandas.
Now is also probably a good time to disclose my Halloween costume...
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52) Cloud Nothings - “Modern Act”
Me, blogging about my excitement for the new Cloud Nothings album that drops in three weeks.
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51) A Tribe Called Quest f/ André 3000 - “Kids” (no link)
Welcome back.
50) Run The Jewels - “Talk To Me”
Haven’t listened to RTJ3, but it’s only been out for, like, 10 days. Still, this song is as reliably dope as they’ve always been. I also felt compelled to include ATCQ and RTJ in these spots to ensure they were not above “Panda”.
Brave men didn't die face down in the Vietnam muck so I could not style on you
49) Kevin Devine - “No History”
My aforementioned buddy Dave Rokos likes this song because of its big chorus, and I’d also like to use it as a selling point.
48) Kings Of Leon - “Reverend”
For as big as Kings Of Leon are, I haven’t really heard this song anywhere.
47) Rae Sremmurd f/ Gucci Mane - “Black Beatles”
I always thought Rae Sremmurd were kinda meh (at best) and Gucci Mane was an idiot’s idiot (at absolute best), but this song’s a banger -- and this conclusion was reached prior to it going viral with the Mannequin Challenges. Speaking of... my 2016 Black Wednesday:
A video posted by Bobby L (@bobbystompy) on Nov 23, 2016 at 7:15pm PST
46) Grimes - “Kill V. Maim”
This song is straight out of a video game or action movie. Like, get ready to fight a boss or something.
45) Dave Hause - “With You”
Heartfelt ballad that feels sprawled out across a few genres.
44) Robin Thicke f/ Nas - “Deep”
What do we get when we combine a dude with no credibility and feature a dude with tons of credibility? A sneaky sizzling collab. And if you still got beef, remember: it ain’t that deep.
43) Against Me! - “Rebecca”
A lot of people have had this AM! song on their year end lists, and I wasn’t seeing it, but after a few extra spins, it became pretty clear this was thee highlight from the album. It’s got this kinetic energy, spinning out of control while somehow maintaining perfect balance.
42) Restorations - “See”
Restorations make spectrum songs; ones you listen to while the world moves in slow motion at an airport reunion, while time stops after a death, or stretches out on an overly contemplative Sunday evening. What I’m saying is, these dudes control the clocks.
41) Aaron West and the Roaring Twenties - “Green Like The G Train, Green Like Sea Foam”
Soupy from The Wonder Years’ solo project keeps -- PUN INTENDED -- chuggin’ along with this one. He’s singing in the same gear he always sings in, but the chorus and always trusty synced rhythms that break it in two definitely get me goin’. 
40) Titus Andronicus - “No Future”
Titus Andronicus covering Craig Finn, and they add just the right amount of anguish to the proceedings. There’s such an obvious-yet-still-clever element to the “February’s about as long as it is wide” line.
39) Rihanna - “Needed Me” (NSFW-ish video)
This song is good -- Mustard on the beat, natch -- but RiRi murdering a dude in the back of a strip club in the video might be better.
38) Jeff Rosenstock - “Festival Song”
The former Bomb the Music Industry! singer dipped his toe in a few genres throughout his 2016 album “Worry”, though I’m not sure how to describe this one; it’s kind of spastic punk with some synthy keyboards and a catchy outro, strong enough to throw two capable haymakers as the song enters its final minute. 
37) The Steve Adamyk Band f/ Colleen Green - “Carry On”
I hadn’t even heard of this band a month ago, but “Carry On” has quickly become a favorite; toe-tappin' rock.
36) The Naked And Famous - “Higher”
This band seems like they’d have -- there is no better word I’m so sorry -- epic concerts. Also, don’t miss out on the “In The Air Tonight”-sounding fills.
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35) Phantogram - “You Don’t Get Me High Anymore”
Brilliant drum samples, drug stuff, and a pop sensibility; you seriously could not ask for more.
34) Child Bite - “Vermin Mentality”
This song is quite harsh, and I imagine if you had individual approval ratings for all 132 of these songs, it would very easily finish in the bottom five. That said, I think it rocks, and it reminds me of the Dead Kennedys’ best scenario.
33) Joyce Manor - “Last You’ve Heard Of Me”
Sure, I reacted like a mom when I saw Barry’s new neck tattoo in the video, but the song was the redeemer. Recommended if you like the Everclear “Santa Monica” intro, marijuana makes you tired, or you’ve found love in the parking lot outside a karaoke bar.
32) Cassino - “Alabama Song”
If you did happen to listen to “Vermin Mentality”, this’ll probably be the song to get that taste out of your mouth. I love its overall laid back vibe, even if what it’s about remains unclear after a good chunk of listens.
31) Direct Hit! - “Was It The Acid?”
This one lost several punk points after the singer revealed he did not use hard drugs. But still.
30) Bayside - “Pretty Vacant”
My buddy Brian Pawola doesn’t like this song because of the teenage-y “I can’t believe this is my life, I’m pretty vacant all the time” chorus, but that’s precisely why I do. Also, apparently the album it’s off of is called “Vacancy”, haha.
29) PUP - “Familiar Patterns”
Feels weird not picking a single, but this one was always my favorite; the same percussive power, shreddy singing, and unrelenting noise we got in their debut a few years ago. Also funny: they named their 2016 album “The Dream Is Over”, which is what the PUP singer’s doctor told him after diagnosing his vocal chord ailment.
28) Tokyo Police Club - “Not My Girl”
Sometimes, I wanna tell non-punk fans TPC is what all punk rock sounds like, because even though the band has more of a pop-indie element, they do seem like the genre’s best case scenario more often than not.
27) The Falcon - “If Dave Did It”
Feels like sacrilege picking a Dave Hause fronted track for my Falcon choice. After all, this is Brendan Kelly’s group, and after an EP and two full lengths, it’s Dave’s first ever time fronting a song in the band. But this song kept standing out. It also has a small drum solo, and even though basically all drum solos are bad, Neil Hennessy’s on the kit -- so you know you’re in good hands.
26) Chance The Rapper f/ 2 Chainz & Lil Wayne - “No Problem”
Chance’s “Coloring Book” was so positive and creative and multi-faceted that it feels a little wrong to pick a song that’s more traditional rap with typical guests, but it really is the best song, you know? For whatever reason, Lil Wayne’s nonchalant verse was my favorite, with his initial bars being the highlight:
I got problems bigger than these boys My deposits, they be on steroids Lord, free the Carter, n****s need the Carter Sacrificin' everything, I feel like Jesus Carter
But sure, we can also highlight funny 2 Chainz things:
- “Inside of the Maybach look like it came out of Ikea / Run shit like diarrhea” (oh my god)
- “Aye, aye, captain / I'm high, captain / I'm so high / Me and God dappin'” (haha)
Also, if you don’t raise-and-drop your arms for the “huh! huh!” part before the beat kicks in at the beginning after “lobby”, you’re a monster.
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25) David Rokos - “Pacific Time”
Falling in lust with a California girl who has the keys to bomb ass hotel room overlooking the ocean? What self-deprecating heterosexual dude isn’t signing up for this?
24) NOFX - “Six Years On Dope”
Thrash punk, with Fat Mike and Eric Melvin divvying up the vocals after arguing to start the song. Here’s the July 2016 description I emailed to the gf:
So, the lead singer has kind of a flat, annoying voice, but then there's this guitarist who mostly does yell parts and not a lot of leads, but in this song, they both basically trade off yelling, and the guitar is blaring, and it just does not relent. They've released a million records at this point, but something about it feels so fresh. Like new blood has been infused into all of them.
You will like... 0% of this.
Her response: “Hahaha. I wouldn't say that I hate this...but it's pretty close.”
23) Beach Slang - “Future Mixtape For The Art Kids”
Of all the artists on this way-too-long list, I had the hardest time picking a Beach Slang song. This is probably because all of their songs sound the same. But as a writer earlier this year said, it’s still a good song. So true. I went with Track 1 from their album “A Loud Bash of Teenage Feelings” (this is the actual title) because it has the biggest chorus:
We're not lost, we are dying in style We're not fucked, we are fucking alive I hope I never die
Every Beach Slang song also has to include “die” or “alive” in the lyrics; this one gets both. Minor gripe: that vocal distortion you hear is an effect used on every other song on the 29 minute record.
22) Kid Cudi f/ André 3000 - “By Design” (no link)
When you think too much, you’re removing what’s moving
This song could literally be in a made up language, but the diction, beat, and Caribbean stylings from Cudi and 3 Stacks would still make you wile out. The full version appears to be nowhere on the free Internet, but I highly recommend finding it.
If you’re too lazy, peep Cudi’s “Goodbye” instead. It’s a pump up track that samples 2Pac and Pink Floyd -- what could go wrong?!
21) Anderson .Paak - “Come Down”
My buddy Ceebs used this as the entrance song at his wedding; he and his wife looked so cool.
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20) The Weeknd - “False Alarm”
Listen, I wanted to include “Starboy”. But after shunning “The Hills” for “Can’t Feel My Face” in 2015, I wanted to pick the weird song over the poppier one this time, OK? This music video is so violent. I also really do wonder if this song has borderline punk elements.
19) Carly Rae Jepsen - “Higher”
Just a Carly Rae “Emotion” b-side cracking the Top 20, no big deal. Seeing CRJ in Milwaukee in March was my favorite concert of 2016; so much so that I saw her in Chicago the next day and even exchanged a shirt (...cutoffs) with the merch guy I’d met already.
18) Brian Fallon - “Red Lights”
We have The Gaslight Anthem singer’s solo project here. This could definitely be a TGA song. “I only stop to tell her that I love her at the red lights” = unstoppable swoon.
17) Jay-Z - “Spiritual”
I need a drink, shrink or something I need an angelic voice to sing something
A song that should’ve had a much bigger spotlight in an incredibly tumultuous year. I remember listening to this during the Dallas shootings, my heart absolutely breaking for the country. Here is the statement Hov released with the track:
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16) Justin Timberlake - “CAN’T STOP THE FEELING!”
Our Song of the Summer, 2K16.
The one critique you could give is maybe it’s a little too easy, a little too low hanging fruit, but my counter would be: who said pop music has to be terribly difficult? And if you’re still folding arms during the “Can’t stop the fee-laaaaahn” falsetto part, having fun probably isn’t your bag.
15) Get Well Cards - “Is It Worth It?”
I think you’re trying to kill me, when you said you’d lick my wounds
I play drums on this jam, but it’s Dave Rokos’ songwriting that gives me all the feels. It always reminded me of a slightly more restrained “Good Things”. This song is about sleeplessness, deep contemplation, and a deteriorating relationship; you don’t know if you should do everything you can to hold on... or mercifully let it all go (”And they say time is all we have to give / And I think I’ve given you enough”... oof).
14) Resolutions - “Daily Train”
Blindly assumed this band was from Canada, but, upon further research, it looks like Germany. Hmm. The singer sounds like the Rise Against dude to me.
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13) Mike Posner f/ Big Sean - “Buried In Detroit (Lucas Lowe Remix)”
Hunger > Strategy
The Mike Posner comeback was one of the more delightful storylines of 2016. Though I liked “Ibiza” quite a bit, I had a softer spot for the one with his fellow Michigander. This is my favorite Big Sean performance of the year, and Posner’s verses and choruses are straight anthemic.
12) blink-182 - “Rabbit Hole”
Though we can all agree “Built This Pool” is the best song of all-time (Travis’ “Is that really it?” = completely perfect), “Rabbit Hole” was a bit more well-rounded -- and it’s Matt Skiba getting in the mix in a blink-182 song (verse two); I can’t believe we’re here.
11) Kanye West f/ Kendrick Lamar - “No More Parties In L.A.”
In honor of its number on our dear list, my Top 11 favorite bars from this banging banger of a song...
11. Kanye: “And as far as ‘Real Friends’, tell all my cousins I love 'em / Even the one that stole the laptop, you dirty motherfucker” (he’s not over it)
10. Kanye: "My psychiatrist got kids that I inspired / First song they played for me was 'bout their friend that just died” (creepy, ominous)
9. Kanye: “Hey baby, you forgot your Ray Bans / And my sheets still orange from your spray tan” (very South Naperville)
8. Kendrick: “She said she came out here to find an A-list rapper / I said baby, spin that 'round and say the alphabet backwards” (the young MC will not be slighted)
7. Kanye: "Thinking back to how I got here in the first place / Second class bitches wouldn't let me on first base" (those days are probably over, Yeezy)
6. Kanye: “Got pussy from beats I did for n****s more famous / When did I become A list? I wasn't even on a list” (those days are also probably over, Yeezy)
5. Kendrick: “Well cutie, I like your bougie booty / Come Erykah Badu me" (that’s just good game)
4. Kanye: “Every agent I know, know I hate agents / I'm too black, I'm too vocal, I'm too flagrant” (empowering)
3. Kanye: “I was uninspired since Lauryn Hill retired / And 3 Stacks, man, you preach it to the choir” (golden)
2. Kanye: "Mulholland Drive, need to put up some god damn barricades / I be paranoid every time, the pressure / The problem ain't I be drivin' / The problem is I be textin'" (we’ve all been there)
1. Kanye: “I be worried 'bout my daughter, I be worried 'bout Kim / But Saint is baby 'Ye, I ain't worried 'bout him” (and we’ll end with my favorite rap lyric of 2016)
10) Daya - “Hide Away”
It took a few listens to realize how sublime this one is. The lyrics are solid, the beat is great, and they display some real patience with how the hi-hat notes are deployed, and it really helps control the flow of urgency (Posner uses this tactic in the “Buried In Detroit [Remix]” as well).
Also, don’t sleep on its grocery store banger potential with the happier sounding and cutesy “Tell me where the good boys go” bridge.
9) Beyoncé f/ Kendrick Lamar - “Freedom” (note: link is to the live performance)
This is big.
I remember when “Lemonade” dropped, I was txting with my friend Buffalo Grove Tina (she’d heard the album and I hadn’t yet), giving her selective feedback as I was progressing through the tracks. She then sent a message that stuck with me every listen since:
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Hooooooly buckets, she nailed it. The Just Blaze beat should be sent to the CDC, Yoncé is breathing fire, and once you start to finally wrap your head around all of that, you get a K-Dot verse as icing on a cake that already had great cake and great icing. It’s run-through-walls time.
8) Drake - “One Dance” (note: link is to the live version)
Drake has been so consistent with his output this decade, turning every year into a "Should I pick the hip-hop song or the pop song?" debate when it comes to list-making. This time, the pop song wins (or dancehall, really).
"One Dance" is a good joint to drink, dance, or sway to. There's a reason it became his most streamed song of all-time.
7) The Hotelier - “Piano Player”
What a beautiful piece of music. The warmness I feel during the “I don’t know if I know love no more” is unmatched. Their album (”Goodness”) is one of the year’s best.
6) Culture Abuse - “Dream On”
This song is automatic pulverization. Like, about 80% of the way through, it tries to end but somehow can't. The chorus isn't ready to be done. Some have compared the singer's style to a robot, but I think it just sounds *cool*.
5) Japandroids - “Near To The Wild Heart Of Life”
She kissed me like a chorus
Skeptics might hate on this song for sounding like a retread of their sound from 2012's legendary album "Celebration Rock", and even non-skeptics may roll their eyes at the "I used to be good, but now I'm bad" line. But I shun these trigger happy notions. Enough time has passed since “CR”, and I was ready for this band to come back; beyond ready. This song gave me everything I was missing during the Japan-void.
/walks out of the room with an unflinchingly straight face
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4) Pusha T f/ Jay-Z - “Drug Dealers Anonymous”
My pick for the best hip-hop track of the year. No choruses, no trade offs; it’s one long Pusha verse, then one long Jay verse -- the best rap verse of 2016, by my count. Pusha’s is galvanizing too, though. He paints pictures, conjures the Flint water crisis*, and sets up a bowling pin for the GOAT to roll one at...
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/deep breath
Just, like, fuck, man.
JAY-Z IS SO GOOD AT RAPPING WORDS
Shawn Corey Carter doesn’t walk, he weaves. He doesn’t blast, he shoots silenced. I’d love to use the word “ether” to describe the verse but won’t out of respect. What doesn’t it have? I don’t know. Here’s what it does have: Tomi Lahren she gone, drug dealer stuff, rich guy stuff, historical and pop culture references (I’ll defend the “Damn, Daniel” line to the death), and this piece of divinity: “Y’all think Uber’s the future, our cars been autonomous”.
Sometimes all I can do is put my head down, bite my lip, and bob when this song comes on; lucky to be alive, like always.
(* - Pusha apparently donated water to the city but wanted it nameless, rationalizing it in the song with: “And I can’t even mention what I sent or what I spent / Cause my name in 18 wheelers is evidence”)
3) Modern Baseball - “Apple Cider, I Don’t Mind”
MoBo’s “Holy Ghost” was a little uneven as an album, but I’m just happy to have singer Brendan Lukens here with us after his bout with depression, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts. By the time he got back to the studio after rehab, he was ready to give us at least a little insight into his psyche -- and it’s desperate, scary, and beautiful. My favorite overall musical moment of 2016 is the pleading “I can’t” he hits at the 1:15 mark of this one.
Clocking in at a tick under two minutes, this song almost feels incomplete in a way that 2014′s “Rock Bottom” (2:14 itself) didn’t. It’s like Lukens wants to sprint so hard he passes out, worrying not as much about finishing the race but instead focusing on giving the audience all of himself while in the booth.
2) Pinegrove - “New Friends”
Hit me, Spin:
Pinegrove are almost radically likable, soft-spoken in a year of grandiose statements, filling a void that only existed in retrospect.
Damn straight. I hadn’t even heard of these guys at the start of the year.
This goes from indie folk to a Weezer-y outro with only a short build up, but the songwriting and lyrics are in a style all their own, really. That’s it.
1) The Menzingers - “Lookers”
When this dropped, my buddy Chris Trott emailed me what he always emails me when a new song piques our interest: “Holy good god damn this is good. This is like 'I believe in music again' good.”
Shortly after, I remember leaving work for lunch and bumping the song for the first time in a parking lot. I wrote him back: “Was staring at this brick wall while listening and the first thought that popped into my head was something like 'It feels like they are taking my soul out of my body and splattering it on that wall' (in the best way, of course).”
Nostalgic verses, massive Jersey chorus, an “On The Road” reference, and the desire to want more of these songs even after you were just given everything in a single installment.
This god damn band.
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